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runningfrom2am · 3 months

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cold nights // part eighteen

summary: you showed him colours he knows he can't see with anyone else.

pairing: coriolanus snow x fem!reader

wc: 3.8k

masterlists / nav / requests

tags/warnings: tribute!reader and mentor!coriolanus, r is very sweet (too kind for this world. literally.), sunshine x grumpy trope kinda, he falls first, violence typical for the source material, depictions of mental illness, also she's is very smart (as she should), district twelve!reader.

a/n: hiii posting this early bc bestie and i are ab to start a 24 hour readathon! if i'm not active for the next day, that would be why. anyway wish us luck!! also i didn't edit this as thoroughly as i should have so i'm sorry lol

my asks are also open to talk about this series! (i do have emoji anons open now too!)

send me any and all of your thoughts! here!

series masterlist // playlist

You called out of work indefinitely, after that. You didn't want to quit, you wanted to love your job and you honestly couldn't see yourself doing anything else but right now, you just couldn't. Luckily, the girls who worked down at the library were incredibly understanding according to Lennox, who was sent to deliver your letter of leave and apology.

It had been close to a week when you finally ventured out to the back porch to read rather than rotting in bed all day staring at the ceiling. Your mother made you tea, and insisted she come sit with you. You enjoyed the company.

"Would you like to talk about it?" She asks, just as you're turning the page. Under normal circumstances, you'd resort to Romeo and Juliet, but now you feel like you couldn't stomach it. So, Much Ado About Nothing would have to suffice.

"I'm okay, Ma." You say softly, giving a slight shake over your head as your eyes fly over the faded lettering on the page.

"Lennox told us what happened, you know." She adds after a beat of silence.

You look up at her, frowning. "I'm sorry. He wasn't supposed to tell anyone."

"Don't be, dear." She shakes her head quickly, gently resting a hand on your thigh. "I wish you had told us. I wouldn't have invited him in that day, I could have told you he stopped by and we could have made a plan. I shouldn't have sprung that on you."

You sigh, pursing your lips and closing your book. "I didn't want you to dislike him, that's why I didn't tell you. I thought... I wanted to come home with at least something positive to talk about. And I thought that if I gave it enough time, thinking positively about him, I could try to contact him without seeing... that."

She smiles sadly at you. "You really love him, huh?"

"How could I not?" You admit quietly, staring at the cover of the book on your lap. "He was the first person there to show me kindness, to make me feel like I wasn't alone." You explain. "It felt... Like Romeo and Juliet. Star-crossed lovers, because of course I didn't think I could really have him. I was living in a dream, in a way."

"And now?" She prompts you to continue, thrilled that you are finally opening up.

"Some Cupid kills with arrows, some with traps."

She chuckles, gently rubbing your leg. "So that's a yes, then."

"How I wish it was not." You groan, reaching for your cup to drown your predicament in tea.

"Your brother," She sighs, gently removing the book from your lap. "came home that night just... just shaking with anger. And he looked me and your father in the eyes and said he was going to kill Coriolanus. He was set on it." She explains, and you look at her.

"He said that?" You ask, and she nods.

"I could see it in his eyes, he meant it, and we were so confused. Because, after all, it had been Coriolanus and Sejanus who came to the door seeking help for you, and your father told me Coryo looked like a ghost- bless him." She chuckles slightly.

"What I mean is... Your brother is not immune to violence, either. He would hurt someone for you, I know it. Just because you don't wish him to, doesn't mean he doesn't love you so much that he would do anything." You mull over her statement, chewing passively on your lip. "And boys... boys just do things differently than you and I would. Or Lucy Gray would. I bet if you asked her about Billy Taupe, Tam Amber, or little Clerk Carmine, that she'd tell you they've all had their moments. But boys aren't treated fair in this life, so sometimes, they don't fight fair."

"Coriolanus killed someone, Ma."

"Why?" She asks. "Lennox told me you saw it. Why did he kill that boy?"

"Because..." You shake your head. "He was trying to kill him, first."

"Okay, well-"

"But that I can understand, given the circumstances." You quickly explain, guilt settling in your stomach like a weight as you put your mug back down. "It was after. Bobbin had so clearly already passed on, and he hit him again. It was anger, and it was not necessary. A waste of precious time he didn't have but he did it anyway and that... that scared me."

She hums, listening to you intently. "If it helps, dear, and this is my honest feelings... I still think he is a good man, with a good heart." She says. "I know what you've seen is... gosh, it's unfathomable, and I wish I could take that pain from you, but I really do think that if you still feel anything for him you should talk to him."

Your eyes snap up to hers, and you look scared.

"I've only met him once, but gosh, the way he looks at you, and how he spoke about you, he thinks you put the stars in the sky." She grins, trying to relax you by taking your hand. "No problems have ever solved by hiding. And even if you turn out to be correct, that he's never been who you thought he was, you'll get peace by having answers. And even so, he deserves that peace too."

"I... I'll think about it." You nod softly, reaching for your book again.

"Hello? Boys?" Lucy Gray calls out, walking into the small house Coryo and Sejanus have been occupying.

"In here!" Sejanus calls back, and she follows his voice into the small kitchen where he's attempting to make something to eat.

"Ooh, what's for lunch?" She asks, sitting herself down at the dining room table.

"Eggs... I think." Sejanus laughs. Lucy Gray had been coming by to try and keep them company, and she did really like spending time with Sejanus. Coryo didn't have a whole lot to say, though.

"Yum." She giggles, sitting up straight to look into the pan. "Where's Coriolanus?"

"Guess."

"On the back porch staring at the trees?"

"Pretty much."

Lucy Gray sighs, pushing herself up. "Okay, well, The Covey and I are going to the lake tomorrow. It's a hike out, but it's beautiful. You guys should come."

"I'll be there, but I don't know if we can convince blondie." Sejanus nods toward the back door.

"Oh, I'll convince him." She smiles smugly, brushing past him and out the door.

Lucy Gray finds out quickly that apparently she had guessed wrong- he was sitting on the porch, like he had been every day, but today he was reading rather than just staring out at the mountains. "What are ya readin'?" She asks, standing in front of him.

"Nothing that's any of your business." He grumbles, not looking up from the pages of the worn down book.

She leans over him, attempting to read it upside down. "Ah." She grins. "Romeo and Juliet? Good choice."

"What do you need, Lucy Gray?" He asks, closing the book and glaring up at her.

"I've come to extend and invitation to you, we're all going to the lake tomorrow. I think you should come."

"No, thank you."

She rolls her eyes, arms crossed over her chest. "You didn't chop off all those beautiful gold curls just so you could never see Y/N again, did you?"

His eyes visibly brighten at that, only for a moment. "She's going?" This was the chance he was waiting for. He intended to go to your house that following morning, maybe pick up flowers on the way, a book, or some kind of peace offering, but Sejanus and Lucy Gray shut that down very quickly. Even though he cut his hair almost as soon as he got back to this dump they called a house, they said you still needed time.

"Mhm." Lucy Gray nods, smiling at him knowingly. "She hasn't been working, so I was able to book her for the day."

Had Lucy Gray talked to you about this yet? No. But she knew it would do him some good to get away from this house for a day, whether you were there or not, and she knew that deep down you would want to see him again. A group setting was the best way to do this for everyone. She knew he would be easy to convince, but getting you to agree would be the hard part.

"Okay, okay yeah. I'll come." Coryo nods, looking down. He doesn't know what to do with himself, but he feels like he should be doing something to prepare somehow.

"She's still... sensitive. So be nice."

"I have never not been nice to her."

"Never said you have." Lucy Gray raises an eyebrow at him. "I meant be careful. She may not want to talk to you. I won't tell her you're coming so I can at least get her out the door."

"Why not?" Coryo asks, immediately knowing how stupid that sounds when Lucy Gray lets out a laugh. "I mean, I don't want to scare her off, so she should know. Please be honest with her." He pleads.

Lucy Gray's eyes soften at that. "Okay, you're right. But I'm not tellin' you if she says no. You still have to come." She points at him and he sighs.

"Okay, whatever. Sure."

"You're both just rotting and making it worse for yourselves. You need to get out." She says as she walks back inside, leaving him alone to read.

Coryo smiles to himself as he picks the book up again, continuing where he left off even though he's already read it five or six times.

"You're gonna be fine just fine, Y/N/N. I promise." Lucy Gray assures you as you walk down the path toward the forest where the Covey and Sejanus were waiting. With Coryo.

"I won't let him near ya." Lennox adds, kicking a rock aside as he walks in front of you and your friend.

"Whatever you want, sweetheart. If you want space, tell him. I talked to him about this. He knows not to push you." Lucy Gray whispers to you and you nod, teeth digging into the softness of your cheek.

"I know." You say quietly, arm wrapped around hers. You loved going to the lake, and you've been a couple of times since you've been back, but you'd be lying if you said you weren't hesitant to bring him with you. If it goes poorly, you don't know if you could ever go back.

"Yeah, I gave him a stern talkin' to. Put the fear of god in him, he'll be on his best behaviour." She giggles.

"You didn't actually scare him, did you?" You laugh nervously.

"Of course I did." She says, but you know she's just joking.

"Is Billy Taupe coming?" You ask her after a moment.

Your friend wrinkles up her nose and shakes her head. "No, lord, no." She chuckles. "He's off with that Mayfair. Real class act, they are."

You giggle, squeezing her arm. You take it as they're broken up, at least for now. "I'm sorry, Lucy Gray." You add and feel her shrug under your grip.

"I'm done with him this time." She tells you, shaking her head. "I can't trust him no more."

"One foot in sea and one on shore." You comment and she looks at you, a smile pulling on her lips as she gently pulls you closer, leaning her head on your shoulder.

"Y/N!" Maude Ivory greets the two of you first, running up and throwing her arms around your waist. You jump slightly at the sudden contact, making every effort to catch her with nothing more than a slight gasp and a smile. "I've missed you!"

"Hello, dear." You chuckle, running your hands over the length of her blonde hair. "It's only been a couple of weeks, and you do know where to find me."

"Your friend has a gift for you, come on." She grins, letting you go only to grab your hand and pull you up the rest of the hill.

When Coryo sees you, his instinct is to push his hair back out of his face. That can't happen, so he settles for shifting on his feet and gripping the flower he's holding in his hand as you avoid his gaze and he avoids your brothers. Of course you would hide from him- he doesn't fault you for it. You were nervous, he could tell. And of course Lucy Gray neglected to tell him that Lennox was coming, though, he understood why.

He just wished you were angry at him. That would be far preferable to you being afraid.

"Y/N, hi." Sejanus greets you and you smile at him, giving a quiet wave as you adjust your bag over your shoulder. You packed your book and a blanket with some cherries you picked from the tree behind your house to share with everyone. You can see in your peripheral vision that Coryo has gotten a haircut, but you can't bring yourself to look at him just yet. Or comment on it.

"Alright, let's get movin'! The sun is only up for so long." Lucy Gray claps, not forcing you to have to say hi to Coriolanus before she's urging the group on.

Coryo looks at you as everyone else starts walking, and you nod through everyone to go ahead of you. You hate the idea of having people behind you that you can't see.

Then, finally, your eyes land on him. He smiles, hoping you would want to walk with him.

"Go ahead." You say softly, quickly looking up ahead and Lennox has stopped to wait for you.

"Oh, uh, this is for you." Coryo takes a step closer, holding the yellow daisy out to you that he picked on the walk out. Apparently, you didn't want to walk with him- you just didn't want him behind you. That was a thousand times worse.

You look down at it for a moment, reminding yourself quickly to take it instead of just staring. "Thank you." You reply quietly, delicately plucking the flower from his hold.

"Yeah, of course." He grins, not wanting to give up your attention just yet. "I... I'm really glad you agreed to come."

"It'll be nice. The lake is beautiful." You tell him, glancing over at your brother.

"Come on!" He calls out, impatient. "They're gonna leave us in the dust."

You hold back a sigh as you feel Coryo's eyes on you. You guess you will be walking with him, after all. "Coming!" You smile at him.

It's fine- he's fine. He won't hurt me.

You look up at Coryo, and his eyes are still on you. "Shall we?" He grins, gesturing to the path ahead of you.

Okay, he looks normal. His eyes are normal. Blue, sky blue. Gentle.

"Let us go." You grin at him, holding tightly onto the strap of your bag as it rests across your chest. You look back down at your feet as you walk, mindful of the roots and sticks that may trip or scratch you. You spare a glance at his feet as he joins your side on the narrow path.

Lucy Gray knew that even with her warning that Coryo would likely corner you, but she kept a close eye on you even from up ahead while she talked to Sejanus and practically dragged Lennox along with them so he would give you at least a little bit of space.

You walk in silence for a long time. The trees get thicker as you separate from the meadow and the town, isolating you only further, but you didn't feel unsafe. Not really.

Coryo would take what he could get, but he had to try to talk to you eventually. When he planned out this trip in his head the night before they were set to board the train, he had hoped that the days and nights would be spent together. That you'd say you understood, that you were happy and okay and yes! You would love to take him to the lake you frequented, just the two of you, and 'Oh, we should bring a picnic and just spend the whole day there. It will be so much fun!' And he'd get to see your smile without it quickly fading and he could hold your hand and get that second kiss that he never thought he would receive and everything would be perfect.

He never considered himself much of a dreamer, but something about you made that change. After he got to feel his lips on yours, then on the soft skin of your shoulder and his hands on your waist or locked in yours, there was no going back. He was all yours.

"So," He starts talking after only about an hour of walking. You were almost there, so you took a sharp breath in. You could talk for forty minutes. You could do it. And you wanted to, you remind yourself. "This is quite a hike, isn't it?"

"Oh, yes." You nod. "But we aren't far out now. It's worth it, I promise." You say, eyes still locked on the ground just in front of you.

"Don't get me wrong, it's a beautiful walk, just... long." He comments. "And lots of bugs."

"Yes..." You chuckle nervously.

"What's it like?" He asks, desperate just to continue to hear your voice,

"The lake?" You ask, risking a look up at him. His lips form into a smile and he nods, urging you on. "Well," You swallow, trying to organize every detail you remember from last summer, before the games. "The water is very blue, and quite clear. There's a dock, we have the most fun jumping off of it."

Coryo watches your expression intently, trying to inhale every word. You pause, and your face lights up with remembered joy. "My Pa put a rope swing up here for us kids when we were young, and a few summers ago I went to take it- I climbed as far back up as I could before jumping. Then, I felt the branch jerk and I grabbed it tighter, it ended up wrapped around my leg on the way down and I got stuck." You recall the injury, but you're almost laughing. "I got this massive red burn all up the inside of my thigh, and then Lennox ripped the thing down." You giggle, and Coryo swallows. "He was joking, just pretending to even though it was my own fault, but the branch broke clean off and me and Lucy Gray tried to jump out of the way and ended up falling straight into the water."

He laughs with you at that, shaking his head. "Well, I hope your leg wasn't serious." He watches you and you're quick to shake your head.

"No, gosh no." You giggle. "Not worth pulling the whole thing down over, but it wouldn't have been kind to the next kid who swung- that's for sure. So it was probably for the best."

"Fair enough." He shrugs, eyes still glued onto you.

"I'd rather get a burn then have that big ol' thing fall on Maude Ivory or CC. They were just little at the time." He nods. That sounds just like you.

"So you've been friends for a long time, I take it?"

"Well, yes. Since they got stuck here, pretty much."

"Stuck here?" Coryo asks, looking up ahead at the group that was still just within sight.

You look up as well, just to make sure they weren't in earshot. "The Covey isn't District." You explain, voice lowered. "They used to travel everywhere to perform, but then when they got here peacekeepers rounded them up. Executed all their parents, and the kids got stuck here." You tactically leave out the part about his father being the commanding officer at the time.

"Oh."

"I think that's why Lucy Gray can't get over Billy Taupe." You add quietly, watching your friend as she laughs with Sejanus up ahead. "He's one of them, they have so much history. They're on and off, but she'll never abandon him. Not when they've been through so much together. They're the oldest- they've had to take care of the rest of them for almost their whole lives."

Coryo doesn't know what to say. "That's... yeah. I can imagine it would be hard to move on when they're so tied to each other."

You hum in agreement. "Anyway, we met when they were begging outside the market. They set their instruments up and were playing for tips just so they could eat, so my parents stopped and invited them for dinner. They've been with us ever since."

"Your parents are really good people." He comments.

You look up at him, a small smile tugging at your lips. "I told you that, didn't I?"

"Well, you told me they weren't rebels. That doesn't mean they're saints." He jokes.

"Feels like anyone less than a saint these days is considered a rebel for one reason or another." You argue, but there's no harshness at all behind your tone.

"Regardless, your parents are safe." He says, hoping that you've forgotten about his father being a peacekeeper general.

"Well, thank you." You laugh slightly, shaking your head. "How is Tigris, by the way? And your Grandmother? Have you spoken to them since you've been away?"

"I've called a few times, yeah. They're doing well." Coryo smiles. "Tigris is taking some time off, she's working on some different projects at home."

"I'm glad to hear that." You smile. "They must be missing you."

"So they say, yeah." He chuckles.

"It's hard to be away from home." You tell him. "I know it all too well."

His smile drops steadily, but he just nods. "Yes. At least I have the guarantee of returning."

You try so hard to steer every conversation you have away from the games, but it never seems to work. People have so many questions, so many comments, and it's a shame that Coryo is no exception. You suppose that was inevitable. He's one of very few people who somewhat know what you went through.

You really wish you had met him some other way.

"I'm sorry." He quickly apologizes, sensing your shifted energy. "That was... I shouldn't have said that."

"No, no. It's okay." You insist. "I just... Everyone wants to talk about it all the time. I can't escape it."

"I should have known better. I'm sorry." He says again, taking in a deep breath. "I wanted to be different. I try so hard to not make you think about it and I should have remembered that before I said anything, I just-"

You shake your head, frowning as you look up at him. "I wouldn't expect you to." You tell him. "If I'm honest, you're the one person I think I am okay with discussing it with."

Coryo has to fight back the smile threatening to pull at his cheeks from the relief. You weren't planning on never talking to him again. This was a great sign. He opens his mouth to speak when he hears shouting from up ahead.

"We made it!" Lucy Gray cheers, and sure enough, he can see the lake appearing through the trees.

"Coryo, you gotta see this!" Sejanus's voice follows.

"We made it." You smile, happy to change the subject. "Come on, the water is going to feel so good."

Then, you're jogging up ahead of him and pulling your bag off to leave on the dock.

taglist: @soulessjourney , @that-veela-girl , @dreamyysouls, @rockstarbfs , @maysileeewrites , @baybieruth , @kitscutie , @fratboyharrysgf0201 , @totallynotkaibiased , @stelleduarte , @secretsicanthideanymore , @bejeweledreverie , @drewsandsebastianswife , @niicole-87 , @queenofshinigamis , @innercreationflower , @nallasstuff , @scorpiolystoned , @iovemoonyy , @thatmarvelchick19 , @wearemadeofstardust0 , @regulusblackcore , @puredreamagination , @fantasticchaosthing , @becauseseaotters , @secretsicanthideanymore

okay suddenly tumblr isn't letting me tag more people than this so i just made some cuts unfortunately :') i just left the max amount of people i could whose users i recognized and see in my notifs all the time :) if you're not on here and you should be i'm so sorry!

also this taglist is closed now!! if you’d like to get a notification when i update, turn on my post notifications!! i promise i won’t spam y'all :,)

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bellaxgiornata · 8 months

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Maybe This Time

Pairing: Frank Castle x Fem!Reader

Summary: You often work through the night at the Sunny-Side Up Diner just off of I-80, but sometimes during your long shifts your favorite drifter stops in for a meal. Even if nothing has ever actually happened between you two, there's certainly been plenty of flirting. But one morning he stops in before your shift ends and you wonder if maybe this time things will be different.

Warnings/Tags: 18+; smut and soft Frank, need I say more?

Word Count: 7.9k

a/n: This one is long and it got a bit away from me because I just had to add plot, but there's a lot of smut at the end! Normally I'd edit a lot more as well, but hopefully you enjoy my first Frank Castle smut (though certainly not my first time writing smut in the slightest if you know me). Feedback is always appreciated--especially since this is my first smutty Frank one-shot!

Tag List: @heimtathurs @linamarr @mattmurdocksstarlight @thepunisherfrankcastle

Hoisting the clean stack of plates up high, you set them on the shelf in the kitchen, standing on your toes just to reach it. Lowering back down to the flat of your feet, you grabbed a couple of clean glasses you’d just finished washing and drying from off of the countertop and stepped to your left just past the large sink. Rising up onto your toes once again, you neatly placed them on the shelf beside the one with the plates. As you turned to grab another couple of clean glasses to put away, you heard Jimmy calling your name from behind you. Hands hovering over the line of clean cups on the countertop, you looked back over your shoulder at him.

"What's up, Jimmy?" you asked.

"Can you take out the garbage?" he asked, flipping a pancake in the pan. “Before it starts overflowing from the morning crowd? I'd get it but–”

You rolled your eyes, grinning as he gestured his hand at the food he was making on the stovetop. Usually Jimmy tried to take the trash out before the morning rush came along; he knew it was often a bit of a struggle for you trying to toss the heavy bag up into the dumpster out back, but you knew he’d been a bit distracted tonight, too. Maria and him were in another fight and whenever that happened, Jimmy was only ever half-present at the diner.

"Yeah, yeah," you said, wiping your damp hands on your apron. "I got it."

"You sure?" he asked.

"Yeah, Jimmy, I can handle it," you assured him.

He focused back on the eggs in the frying pan as you headed over to the garbage bin. With a sigh you began to tie the bag into a knot, cringing when something wet touched the side of your hand. Once the bag was tied, you managed to pull it up and out of the bin, grunting at the effort. Struggling with the bag now in both of your hands, you shuffled your way over to the door just to Jimmy’s right. Pressing your shoulder against it, you pushed it open and stepped out into the early morning, both of your hands hefting the bag of garbage outside with you.

Blissful silence met your ears the moment the door shut with a click behind you. If you hadn’t been toting a very full bag of disgusting garbage to a dumpster right now, you’d have enjoyed the brief break from the noise of the diner. But as you awkwardly shuffled your way over to the dumpster, carrying the garbage in both of your hands, you felt the bag beginning to tear beneath your fingers.

“Come on,” you groaned. “Don’t break open on me. That’s the last thing I need right now.”

Huffing in irritation, you set the bag down, leaning it up against the dumpster. You took a moment to rearrange your grip along it, examining the hole that had torn open from your nails as you did. You didn’t want to hoist the bag up overhead only to be doused in garbage if the hole just tore wider open on you. That was also the last thing you needed.

Bending down, you got a better grip on the bag and were mentally preparing yourself to heft it up and toss it into the dumpster, but before you could even attempt to pick it back up again, you heard a voice call out your name. You froze at the sound, head spinning over your shoulder towards the direction it had come from as your pulse sped up in excitement and recognition.

“You need some help there, darlin’?”

A smile gradually broke wide across your face when your eyes landed on Frank standing there at the corner of the building, his hands stuffed into the pockets of his black jacket. He eyed you with a grin on his own face, the sight immediately turning your entire shitty third shift around.

Heart fluttering in your chest, you released your grip on the bag and turned towards him, straightening back up as you took in his appearance. There were no bruises or cuts on his face this time. It also looked like his beard had grown out just a bit more in the past almost week and a half since you'd last seen him. You secretly always liked when he showed up unshaven like this; there were many a night or early morning where your fingers itched just to feel the scratch of that darkened stubble beneath them. Though of course, you never had touched him like that.

But he looked good–not that he didn't always.

Frank was your favorite customer at the Sunny-Side Up Diner. He always came in sporadically at varying hours, but he always came in during your shifts which ran through the night until you finished at seven in the morning. Generally after a few days had passed since his last visit to the diner, you found yourself working through your shifts and always perking up when you heard the bell over the diner door ring. Every time it did, your head darted up at the noise, hoping you'd see Frank making his way towards a table with his eyes searching the diner just for you.

It had been almost six months now of Frank’s random visits to Sunny-Side Up. From the very first time you'd served him breakfast at almost one in the morning–pancakes and scrambled eggs with a side of bacon–Frank had flirted with you. Not quite so bold and openly at first; initially it had been the way his eyes had lingered on you along with the little smiles he sent you. The jokes he’d made just to make you laugh. It had actually been you who had begun to make the more brazen comments to him, enjoying the way his deep brown eyes had lit up each and every time. Soon he’d started calling you pet names–darling or sweetheart. You’d loved it every single time he said it in that deep, rumbling voice of his with the way the corner of his lips would always quirk up in a smile. For months now you’d been dying to know what it would sound like to hear him whisper one of those terms of endearment in your ear.

And that had quickly become the norm between the pair of you. Frank would come into the diner during your shift and you would seat him in the booth that you’d come to associate with him. He’d order one of the handful of things he usually ordered, and then for the duration of his time at the diner, the pair of you would openly flirt with each other until he inevitably finished his meal. He would always generously tip you before making his way across the parking lot towards his van, leaving you to watch it pull out towards the interstate again. And each time he left, you were left wondering if that time was the last time you'd ever see him again.

Admittedly Frank’s last visit to Sunny-Side Up had been a bit more eventful than usual, though. An older man had been dining in on that early morning and he had been frustrating and incredibly rude to you while you'd waited on him. A handful of times Frank had actually paused eating his meal, shooting the man a look that could’ve certainly killed as he repeatedly warned the man to be respectful. But the moment the man had slapped your ass as you'd turn to leave the table, Frank had risen to his feet and latched onto that man's arm so damn fast that you hadn’t even seen it coming. He nearly broke the man's wrist when he forced him to apologize to you.

You'd truly thought that time might have been the time that things would’ve been different. That maybe that time something more than just flirting might finally happen between you both. But no. Frank had lingered for a bit longer than usual after that man had left, making sure you were alright. But as usual, he'd inevitably gotten into his van and headed back on I-80 like every other time he'd stopped at the diner. After that, you had completely lost all hope that you'd ever do anything more than flirt with him.

"I'm good, Frank," you called back, waving a hand at him. "Why don't you grab a seat and I'll be right in to get your order?"

"And leave you out here struggling?" he asked back.

Shaking his head, he began to saunter his way towards you. There was always a sort of confidence to the way Frank walked, you’d noticed; his gait alone had turned you on many times before as you’d watched him make his way through the parking lot to the diner door. And right now was no different as your gaze openly surveyed him with each step.

"Tell you what, sweetheart,” Frank continued, an almost cocky grin on his face. “You let me take care of this for you, and then I'll grab a seat. Alright?"

"Well now I hardly think that's fair," you pointed out, watching as he quickly closed the distance between you both. "You shouldn’t be doing my work for me, Frank."

He came to a stop just in front of you, his deep brown eyes locked on yours. Loosing an amused chuckle, he bent down and grabbed the garbage bag with one hand. Effortlessly he lifted the bag up, tossing it into the dumpster beside the pair of you. His lips soon curled into a smirk, his eyes never having left yours.

"Hardly call that work," he teased. "Don't worry 'bout it. Just means I get more time having you grace me with your presence, darlin’."

You laughed lightly, the usual flood of elation you always had around Frank flooding you once again. Despite how much you’d tried to force yourself to believe nothing more would ever happen between you two, you always fell fast and hard back into your feelings whenever he was right there in front of you. It was impossible to ignore just how bad you wanted him and how much you’d grown to care for your favorite drifter when that handsome smile was on his face and directed at you.

"You know you almost missed me entirely this time," you teased back. "Cutting it real close with the end of my shift, Frank."

His head tilted to the side, his tongue darting out between his lips as he eyed you for a second. You fought the shudder that threatened to race down your spine under the weight of his stare.

"Is that right?" he murmured, the deep rumble of his voice raising goosebumps along your arms. "Glad I didn't get held up any longer then. Would have been a damn shame showin' up here without you brightenin' my day."

"Ever the smooth talker," you replied, nudging his solid arm with your elbow as you stepped past him and towards the kitchen door.

"Just being honest, sweetheart," he called after you.

Biting back the smile on your face, you pulled open the door and stepped back inside the diner. Kim stopped mid-sentence in her conversation with Jimmy the moment the door opened, her eyes shifting towards you. When she saw the look on your face, her own face lit up into something mischievous.

"Your man finally back in?" she asked, gesturing a hand to your face. "That why you're smiling so wide?"

"He's not my man," you corrected her, cheeks burning. "But yeah. He's here."

Making your way over to the sink, you turned on the faucet and began washing your hands. Kim made her way over, bumping her hip into yours as you lathered your hands with soap. Glancing over at her, you shot her a questioning brow.

“When are you going to actually do something about him always coming in here for you?” she asked.

“I don’t think he wants me to do anything about it,” you replied, rinsing your hands under the faucet. “It’s been how many months of constant flirting. He’s never done anything more than that. And he’s not here for me, he’s here for the food.”

“Nearly broke that asshole's arm the other week for you,” Jimmy called out from beside the stove.

“Okay,” you agreed, grabbing a nearby towel and drying your hands along it. “But that guy was an asshole and he had it coming. That doesn’t mean anything.”

“He only ever comes in during your shift,” Kim pointed out. “He’s never come in during mine. Only times I’ve seen him here is when you’re working. But,” she continued, that mischievous glint returning to her eyes, “I can always play matchmaker.”

Removing your hand from the towel you’d been drying it on, you pointed a firm finger at Kim. She cocked an eyebrow in a challenge at you in return.

“Don’t go making things weird,” you warned her. “I have no idea what the hell is or isn’t going on between us, but I don’t want you scaring him off before I ever have a chance to find out.”

You hung the towel back up on the hook on the wall before turning, heading towards the door that led out to the diner. From behind you, you heard Kim calling out after you.

“Better make a move before I do then!”

You flipped her off as you made your way out of the kitchen, the sound of her laughter following after you. Though the moment you spotted Frank sitting in his usual booth, you lowered your hand back to your side and hesitated. He’d turned towards you a bit in the seat the moment his eyes caught yours, his teeth biting at his bottom lip as that sexy smile of his pulled the corners of his mouth upwards. It took you a few seconds to manage to stop staring at him, blinking rapidly a few times as your feet finally carried you over towards his booth. Frank’s grin only seemed to spread wider, having noticed you staring at him. That had your face burning as you approached him.

“What can I get you this time, Frank?” you asked when you reached his table.

He leaned back in the booth, his thumbnail slipping between his teeth as he grinned back at you. Eyes dropping down to those lips of his, you felt something stirring within you. What would that mouth feel like on yours? Trailing kisses down your neck? Making their way towards the place that was currently aching for him as he sat there?

Chewing the inside of your cheek, you did your best to focus back on his eyes. You needed to stop thinking about that. At least until your shift finished and you could go home and deal with that growing heat between your thighs.

“Besides your company?” he asked, one dark brow rising up onto his forehead. “How ‘bout a stack of pancakes and a side of bacon.”

“Always with the pancakes,” you teased.

“What can I say?” he replied, shooting you a wink. “I like what I like.”

You couldn’t fight the grin that slipped across your lips at his words–and goddamn was he always good with them.

“I’ll go put in the order,” you told him. Gesturing your hand at his empty coffee mug you asked, “You want me to fill that?”

He nodded once, his eyes never leaving you. “Yes ma’am,” he answered. “Been a long night, I could certainly use some.”

“I’ll get right on that,” you told him, turning back towards the kitchen.

You managed to take one step before you heard Frank behind you. At the sound of one of those pet names of his for you coming out in that near purr of a voice of his, you nearly died on the spot.

“Thank you, sweetheart.”

That voice of his did something to you every damn time he came in here.

°•°•°•°•°•°

Eyes focused on your feet, you headed over towards your car, entirely aware of Frank’s presence just at your side. He was admittedly impossible to ignore to begin with, but with the way he was walking so close to you, his hand kept occasionally brushing against yours. It had become an actual struggle for you to refrain from trying to just grab it each time it did.

“First time you’ve walked me to my car,” you said, breaking the silence.

“Well usually you’re still workin’ when I leave,” he pointed out. “Otherwise I would’ve. Gladly.”

His hand bumped up against yours again and your eyes briefly closed, that urge to just grab it washing over you again. Exhaling a breath, you opened your eyes and saw that you were just beside your car. Coming to a stop, Frank came to one with you.

“This is me,” you said lamely, gesturing a hand at the car.

He nodded back at you, his hands returning to the pockets of his coat. Another little silence fell between the pair of you and you awkwardly hugged your arms over your chest. Did you just say goodbye now? Except Frank hadn’t made an attempt to leave. Instead, his eyes narrowed at you as his brows pinched together in what looked like thought. Nerves began to shake loose in your stomach, causing it to knot together. Normally Frank wasn’t so quiet and pensive around you.

“Can I tell you somethin’?” he asked suddenly.

Your heart nearly skipped a beat in your chest at his question. “Yeah,” you answered, nodding. “Of course.”

Frank ducked his head, shuffling his boots along the pavement. He almost looked nervous right now which only made you more curious.

“I knew you were finishing your shift soon when I showed up,” he admitted. “Truth is, I came here hoping you’d…maybe want to grab a cup of coffee somewhere afterwards?”

Your mouth dropped open in surprise at his question. You had not been expecting it despite the months of flirting. Frank glanced back up at you, his head still partially ducked down as something almost timid and nervous overtook his expression. You’d never seen him quite like this.

And did he really just ask you out?

Before you even had a just to respond he pulled a face, shaking his head. A frown settled on your lips, your brows partially drawing together in confusion at the abrupt shift in his mood.

“You know what? Nevermind, I shouldn’t have asked,” he said quickly, waving a dismissive hand. “I’m sure you’re tired and don’t want to grab coffee with some–some strange guy that shows up every few days at your diner.”

“Or you could come have coffee at my place,” you blurted.

Frank stiffened in front of you, his eyes landing back on yours. He stood there staring at you for such a long time that you’d almost backpedaled the offer, thinking you’d gone too far. Should you not have offered that? Was that not what he wanted?

“Yeah?” he asked curiously, his brows briefly drawing together.

Nodding quickly, you hummed out an affirmative. “Yeah,” you answered. “You uh, you can just follow my car?” You gestured a hand down the road. “I’m in a duplex just a few streets over. It’s–it’s not far. If you want, I mean. You certainly don’t–”

“I’d like that,” he said, cutting you off.

“Okay,” you breathed out, nervous excitement coursing through you. Gesturing your thumb at your car you said, “I’ll just…lead the way?”

The grin slowly returned to Frank’s face as he nodded his head once. “Lead the way, darlin’,” he said.

Mouth suddenly feeling dry, you made your way over to the driver’s side of your car. As you began to get in, you could hear Frank opening the door to his van nearby. Another wash of nerves shot through you. You couldn’t believe this was finally happening. Frank was actually coming over to your place. And you were pretty certain he was coming over for the same reason you’d invited him, which only had you feeling even more nervous. It had been months of you wondering if this time would either be the last time you saw him, or the time something more happened.

Apparently today was the day something more happened.

Starting up your car, you waited for Frank to start up his van before you’d finally pulled out of the diner’s lot. The drive back to your place was short, just as you’d told him it would be. It had taken only a few minutes for the both of you to get there, and by the time you were trying to unlock your front door with Frank just at your back, your hands were already shaking.

Opening the door, you stepped inside and quickly surveyed the state of your place. The blanket was neatly folded on the back of your couch, your books mostly picked up and put away on the bookshelves. Thankfully your place wasn’t in disarray and you were grateful for having recently done the dishes so your sink wasn’t currently piled embarrassingly high.

“So this is your place, huh?” Frank asked, stepping inside.

Closing the front door after him, you glanced over to where he had stopped. He was standing in your living room, scanning the framed photos on the wall with a smile on his face. It was in that moment that the reality of the situation was beginning to really settle in on you with the sight of him standing here in your space. You’d only ever seen him in the diner before.

“Yeah,” you replied softly, slipping your shoes off your aching feet. “It’s nothing extravagant. Don’t really make that much being a waitress, after all.”

Frank’s attention shifted from the photos, his eyes scanning the living room and what he could see of the kitchen with an approving nod. “I like it,” he said, glancing back at you with a smile. “Suits you.”

“Thanks,” you muttered. Clearing your throat, you gestured a hand towards the kitchen. “Do you, uh, want me to get a pot of coffee brewing?”

“If you’d like,” he replied.

You nodded, your hands fidgeting together as you took a step towards the kitchen, but you stopped a second later, hesitating. Looking back over your shoulder at his curious face, you nervously chewed your lip.

“Sorry, I–I don’t usually do this,” you confessed.

“Neither do I,” Frank told you.

You laughed nervously, eyes dropping down to the worn and faded wood floor of your living room. Soon Frank’s black boots came into your line of sight, your eyes immediately drawn towards them. And then you felt Frank’s fingers lightly gripping your chin, tilting your face back up towards his. You nearly stopped breathing when your eyes met his.

“Can I tell you somethin’ else?” Frank asked.

“Mhmm,” you hummed back.

His eyes searched back and forth between yours for a moment, his fingers still gently gripping your chin. Your breath was starting to come in faster the longer he remained touching you, your own gaze dropping down towards his lips. They were currently pressed together as if he was struggling to just say what he wanted to.

"I only ever stop into that diner for you," Frank finally admitted. "Sometimes I–I even go outta my way just to stop in and see you."

A soft, surprised gasp fell out of you in response. You'd always assumed he came for the food and because he was often on the interstate nearby. You figured the flirting was just something he did because he was there and you returned it. You'd had no idea you were the only reason he kept showing up for months on end.

“Never thought you’d want something more,” Frank continued. “With me, I mean. Always figured you probably had someone.”

“I don’t,” you breathed out instantly, shaking your head.

The corner of his lip briefly twitched upwards. Readjusting his grip on your chin, you felt the calloused pad of his thumb brush your bottom lip. Almost immediately you took a step towards him, breath still coming in faster. The way he was just staring at you had you feeling lightheaded.

“You sure ‘bout this?” he asked, thumb sliding across your bottom lip. “We don’t have to.”

“I’ve barely thought about anything else for months,” you whispered.

The muscles jumped along his cheeks at your admission, his thumb pausing its movement across your bottom lip. Something like surprise glinted back at you in his eyes for just a brief second. But then his fingers released your chin, his large hand instead cupping your cheek and tilting your face further towards his as he stepped into you, closing the remaining space between your bodies. You could feel the heat of him warming up the front of you, the edge of his jacket brushing against your stomach.

Nervously your hands rose from your sides, landing on his firm chest just over that thick jacket of his. Your gaze held his, noticing the way the corners of his eyes twitched ever so slightly at your touch. A sharp exhale fell out of him next, his nostrils flaring, and your hands soon balled into fists against his chest. The anticipation of what happened next was killing you right now.

Almost as if in slow motion, you watched his focus gradually shift down towards your lips. Your heart was racing as if you’d run a marathon, pounding erratically in your chest as you silently begged him to just kiss you. Slowly, Frank finally leaned forward towards you and your eyes fluttered shut. The moment his lips touched yours, you melted into him.

The kiss was gentle and hesitant; you could feel the way Frank was holding back. And his lips–fuck, his lips–they were as soft and warm as you’d always imagined. He tasted sweet like the syrup and pancakes he’d just been eating at the diner. But he pulled away from you far too soon.

Eyes flying back open, you saw Frank’s face just inches from yours. His eyes were on you, searching your face as if he was looking for further permission. Knowing that he wanted this, too, that last bit of nerves quickly faded from you. Hands sliding their way up his chest, you wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him straight into you, pressing yourself to the front of him before you connected your mouths again. This time, Frank wasn’t so hesitant.

His tongue sensually slid along the length of your lower lip, warm and wet. You moaned at the feel of it, unable to fight the sound down. Taking the opportunity, he slipped his tongue inside your mouth, languidly lapping against yours. A burst of pleasure raced through you, your hands sliding up the back of his neck, fingers desperately trying to grasp at his short hair.

As he kissed you, his tongue still taking its time exploring your mouth, his hand made its way to cradle the back of your head as he held you more firmly to him. You were struggling to breathe with the assault he had on your mouth, your nails lightly scratching along his scalp as your thighs pressed together in search of friction. That warm, wet heat was building between them the longer he kissed you like this.

And you needed more.

Reluctantly breaking away from his mouth, you were nearly gasping for air. Frank’s chest heaved as he glanced down at you questioningly, his own breath coming in hard and fast. Wordlessly you unwrapped your arms from his neck, one of your hands undoing the zipper of his jacket. Then you reached up, pushing the coat from off of him as he stood there, watching you.

You threw his jacket across the room towards your couch, and when you glanced back up to meet his eyes again, that questioning look had vanished from them. Reaching down, your hand clasped onto one of his large ones before you turned, heading through your living room and down the hall towards your bedroom. Frank willingly and silently followed after you.

When you’d led him to your bedroom, you released his hand and took a few steps backwards from him. Frank stood there, his bottom lip caught between his teeth as he watched you slip out of your jacket before tossing it onto the floor. You grabbed the hem of your shirt afterwards, pulling it up and over your head before discarding it on the floor beside your jacket, your eyes still locked on Frank’s. Silently, his own hands grabbed the hem of his black long sleeve shirt, effortlessly pulling it up and removing it in one swift motion before he tossed it aside.

As he began to kick off his boots, each one landing with a gentle thud along your floor, your eyes traveled across the expanse of his muscled torso. He was thicker and more defined than your imagination had ever pictured him being. Undoing the button of your jeans, your tongue ran along the back of your teeth as you itched to touch all of his bare skin. Sliding your jeans down your legs, Frank began to unbuckle his belt, the clink of metal causing your jaw to tighten.

Undoing your bra next, you watched as Frank’s eyes dropped down to your breasts the moment they were no longer covered, his fingers unzipping his jeans before he pushed them down his own legs. Breath coming in shallow, you could feel that dampness in your underwear before you even reached down to remove them. The pair of you had barely done more than kiss, yet you were completely aroused. You wanted him. And judging by the large bulge in his dark boxers, he felt the same.

You couldn’t help but to stare when he’d slipped his boxers from off of himself, either. Bottom lip rolling between your teeth, a soft whine left you at the sight of him. He was so thick and long, your cunt throbbed in desperation at the sight. Taking a step forward, your eyes still focused on his erect cock, you had every intention of falling to your knees and taking him into your mouth, but Frank’s voice broke the silence.

“On the bed, sweetheart,” he ordered.

Eyes rising up to his face, you stopped mid-step. There was a grin on his lips as he gestured his head towards your bed.

“Go on,” he urged. “You been takin’ care of me all these months. ‘Bout time I repay the favor.”

Legs trembling slightly at the prospect of what he meant by that, you turned and made your way over to your bed. Climbing up onto it, you made your way towards the top of it before you turned back around. Frank was already kneeling just behind you on the mattress, watching as you laid down along it. His large hands landed on your thighs, sensually dragging their way up the length of them. Goosebumps rippled across your skin at the touch of his warm, rough hands on you, the heat of them lingering long after he’d touched you.

“Gonna take real good care of you, sweetheart,” Frank murmured.

A ripple of excitement shot through you at his words as he lowered down to the bed before you, his eyes locked on yours. One of his large hands slipped underneath your left knee, raising your leg from the bed just a bit. A second later Frank’s face turned and he began trailing open-mouthed kisses up the length of your inner thigh. It felt so damn good that you couldn’t resist the resulting moan that slipped out between your lips as you watched him. His other hand slid over your stomach, holding you to the bed when your hips began to buck the higher up his mouth went.

Lowering your leg back to the bed, he turned his attention to your other thigh. Your hips struggled beneath his strong arm that was holding you still as he began to trail those same delicious open-mouthed kisses up the length of that thigh next. Your hands gripped the bedsheets, curling them into your fists when he finally reached your cunt. The tip of his tongue just ever so lightly grazed the length of you and you lost it.

“Fuck, Frank,” you whined, voice so high and needy you didn’t even recognize it.

Frank chuckled, his hot breath washing over your aching cunt as he did. You squirmed along the bed at the feel of it, your eyes snapping shut as an overwhelming need for him took over you.

“We’re gettin’ to that, sweetheart,” he teased. “Just gimme a minute.”

You felt one of his fingers slip between your dampened folds, his hot breath still washing over you as he gradually ran his fingertip back and forth through your slick. Eyes opening, you focused on him between your thighs. He looked content positioned there, naked and relaxed as he began to tease your entrance with his finger. You sucked in a sharp breath the moment the tip of it dipped inside of you, the sound drawing his eyes up to your face. He smiled back at you, gradually plunging the entire digit into your cunt as he did. You groaned out, head dropping back onto the pillow behind you.

“That’s it,” he praised, his voice sending a shudder through you. “Just like that. Already so wet for me.”

“Fuck,” you whimpered.

He slowly fucked you with his middle finger, his eyes on you for a few moments as he watched you pant and gasp above him. But after a few pumps of his finger into you, he gradually lowered his mouth to your clit and began gently circling the tip of his tongue along the sensitive bud. A jolt of pleasure raced up your spine the second his tongue touched you and your back arched along the bed. His arm was still slung low over your stomach, keeping you firmly pressed to the bed and allowing him to continue the delicate ministrations of his tongue. Though the moment he slipped another of his thick fingers inside of you, picking up the pace of them as they continued to pump in and out over and over, you cried out. Everything he was doing felt so fucking good that you could already feel your climax nearing. Releasing your hold on the bedsheets, one of your hands flew to the longer dark hairs on the top of his head, gripping a handful of it in your fist.

“Thatta girl,” Frank murmured against you, his lips brushing your clit as he spoke. “I got you. Go on.”

“Shit,” you cursed under your breath. “So close, Frank.”

“That’s it, good girl,” he murmured.

Clamping your eyes shut tighter, you felt that crest of your climax about to wash over you. His fucking voice saying things like that in that husky tone of his, while his fingers were deliciously curling deep inside of you with each and every thrust, was about to send you straight over the edge. And when he’d returned his mouth to you, he’d begun to suck your clit into those plump lips of his so perfectly that your eyes rolled back behind your closed lids, the rough scratch of his stubble against your skin pushing you closer to your peak.

“Oh, fuck, Frank–yes,” you breathed out.

Hand fisting his dark hair tighter in your grip, your head rolled back along the pillow. You felt that knot in your gut about to loosen as your back steadily arched off of the bed, breath coming in harder. When he abruptly thrust those two thick fingers of his inside of you so sharply he hit that spot deep inside of you just right, you cried his name out through your bedroom. A warm wash of pleasure flooded your body as Frank continued to work you through your release, his fingers still pumping into you while his mouth continued to eagerly suck your fast-becoming overly sensitive clit.

It was a moment before his lips released you, your body feeling weightless as you sunk into the mattress. Frank gradually slipped his fingers out from inside of you with a soft, wet sound. Your eyes shot open a second later when you felt his tongue lapping up everything that had spilled out of you. A pleased hum vibrated in your throat as you watched him between your thighs, your hand loosening its grip on his hair as you carded your fingers through the short strands.

Eventually he pulled away from you, sitting back on the bed as his tongue ran along his lips. You could see them glistening from your slick in the morning light sneaking in through your closed blinds. Inevitably your eyes dropped down to his still erect cock as he sat between your damp thighs; the tip of it was wet with pre-cum. Your cunt clenched at the sight, desperate to feel him inside of you already.

Pushing yourself upright on the bed, unable to wait any longer, you rose up onto your knees. Frank chuckled when your hands landed on his shoulders and gently pushed him towards the mattress. You grinned at the warm sound but were pleased when he allowed you to push him down to the bed on his back.

“Someone’s eager,” Frank muttered.

“Mmm, someone made me wait almost six months for this,” you replied, throwing a leg over his hips as you straddled his waist. “And now I’m tired of waiting. Aren’t you?”

Frank’s teeth clamped down on his lip, both of his hands landing on your hips as he gave them a squeeze. His eyes were on yours, a warm glint in them that had your heart stuttering at the sight.

“S’pose it has been that long, huh?” he mused, his head playfully cocking to the side. “Want me to grab a condom first, though, sweetheart?”

You shook your head, eyes still on his. “Not unless you want to,” you answered. “I’m on the pill. Haven’t been with anyone in a bit, either,” you admitted.

“Neither have I,” Frank told you.

You gripped the hard length of him, your hand stroking up and down him once while reveling at the soft hiss of pleasure he emitted when you did. Humming out a pleased noise yourself, you lined him up with your entrance and very slowly sunk down onto him. But he was so thick that your eyes immediately snapped shut and both of your hands flew forward, landing on his chest with your nails biting into his skin. You’d just barely managed to get the head of him inside of you before you’d needed to pause, giving your cunt a moment to adjust to the pleasant stretch of him filling you. You weren’t sure if he was just that big or if it had just been that long since you’d last been with someone.

Frank’s hands slipped around to your back, both of his large, warm palms gliding up and down your bare skin. The hairs along your forearms rose at the sensation and the tenderness of his touch.

“Take your time,” he urged. “Feels so goddamn good already, sweetheart.”

Something like a moan vibrated in your throat at his praise, your eyelids fluttering open. Frank was gazing up at you from the bed, a warmth in his eyes again. His hands were still running soothingly along your back, steadily drawing more goosebumps along your skin with each pass.

Slowly, you sunk just a bit further down on his cock, your gaze holding his. A soft gasp fell out of you as you continued to lower onto him until the entirety of Frank was sheathed inside of you. Nails still biting into his chest, you couldn’t fight the pleased groan rolling up and out of your mouth at the feel of him so wholly filling you. You swore you could almost feel him up to your ribcage even though you knew that wasn’t logical.

“That’s it, that’s it,” he murmured, pulling you down towards him with the hands he had on your back. “That’s my girl.”

A faint whine slipped from your lips just before Frank connected his mouth to yours. Your mind quickly grew blank as your lips met his over and over. It wasn’t until your cunt tightened in need that you remembered he was still inside of you. Gradually rolling your hips back until only the tip of him was inside of you, you carefully thrust your hips forward again until he’d once again filled you. A pleasant sting shot its way up your spine and you broke away from his mouth, crying out at the unexpected jolt of pleasure when he hit just the right spot. Frank’s fingers roughly dug into your back, his blunt nails scratching along the expanse of it as he urged you on. Obliging his silent request, you began to move your hips.

At first your pace started slow as you adjusted to the position and the stretch of him inside of you. Though it wasn’t long before your pace began to speed up, Frank’s grunts beneath you reaching your ears and further encouraging your movements. Soon his own hips began to eagerly fuck up into you, matching your pace as you continued to sensually rock into him repeatedly.

Frank’s mouth was at your ear, his tongue swirling around your earlobe as your breasts pressed into his chest. Your fingers were digging into his broad, muscular shoulders as you tried to keep yourself steady while you continued to ride him on your bed, your breath becoming loud and sharp as it mingled with his in the bedroom. When Frank’s mouth lowered to the pulse point on your neck, sucking a patch of skin into his mouth and running his tongue along it, your cunt tightened around his cock as your hips jerked against his.

“Frank,” you moaned. “So good. Feels so good.”

One of his large hands made its slow descent all the way towards your ass, his fingertips dragging down the length of your spine as they went. He palmed your ass roughly when he reached it, a whimper slipping out of you. Soon after he was gipping it firmly and using it to guide your hips a bit faster as he continued to thrust himself up into you. With the way both of your hips were moving now, Frank’s cock continually hit that delicious spot inside of you that repeatedly sent a shockwave of pleasure racing up your spine every single time he bottomed out inside of you. You were so close to cumming again that your mouth lowered to his left pectoral and your teeth clamped down on it, not a single other thought in your mind but how close you were to your release.

“Yeah, there you go, sweetheart,” Frank breathed out beside your ear, his voice strained as he spoke. “Let go for me again. That’s it. Just like that.”

You whined at the sound of his soothing voice beside your ear, your cunt tightening around his cock. With his heavy grunts and panting breaths filling your bedroom, his hard body flush to the front of yours, and his cock continually barreling right on into you, you inevitably hit your peak once more. Teeth releasing the bit of muscle you’d bit along his chest, your head rolled back over your shoulders as a long moan loosed itself from inside of you.

The sound of it only caused Frank’s hand to grip your ass even more firmly, his other arm wrapping around your back like a vice as he held you to himself. And then he began roughly thrusting up into you, loud grunts further filling your bedroom as he chased after his own peak. Your eyes had rolled back yet again behind your closed eyelids, your hips struggling to match his pace until you’d finally felt his own stuttering beneath you. A moment later you felt his warm release inside of you, a deep, gravelly moan falling from between his lips and sending a shudder down your spine as Frank came inside of you. He thrust up into you a handful more times before his hips finally stilled beneath you.

As you both slowly came back to yourselves, you slipped his cock out from inside of you before collapsing on top of him, spent and flushed as your cheek rested on his chest. Frank’s hands began affectionately running along the naked expanse of your back, the feel of his fingertips dancing along your skin almost tickling you as they moved. For a few minutes both of you lay there, breathing hard and trying to catch your breath without a word.

“‘Bout damn time that happened,” you said, breaking the silence.

Beneath you, Frank laughed lightly, the sound drawing a smile to your lips. You rocked a little at the movement from your place along his chest, never having felt more content than you did in that moment.

“Not wrong there, sweetheart,” he agreed.

One of your hands began absently tracing patterns along his bare skin just beside your face. Bottom lip slipping between your teeth, you gathered the courage to ask him what was quickly becoming the focus on your mind.

“So…what’s this mean now?” you asked carefully. “Are you…going to just disappear on me again in a few minutes?”

“You want me to?” Frank asked.

Shifting your head on his chest, you turned until you could glance up at his face, your chin resting against him. “No,” you whispered. “I don’t.”

A smile tugged at his lips as he gazed down at you, his hands still roaming along your back.

“Then I won’t disappear on you in a few minutes,” he promised you.

“Do you–” you paused, eyes nervously dropping down to where your fingers were still tracing patterns on his chest, “–you maybe want to stay for a bit? Clean up and–and get some sleep? And maybe I could…make us some dinner later? Unless you can’t stay that long.”

“I can stay,” Frank stated, that smile still on his face.

“Yeah?” you asked hopefully, brows rising onto your forehead.

“Yeah,” he replied. “I’d like that.”

You grinned, lowering your head back to his chest. Turning just a bit, you pressed a lingering kiss to the skin beside your mouth. Frank hummed out a contented noise above you, the sound only growing your grin.

“You know,” you whispered coyly, “now that you know where I live, you don’t have to always stop by the diner just to see me.”

“That right?” he asked.

“Mhmm,” you hummed out. “Maybe you could actually stop by to see me here. On purpose.” Your tongue ran along your bottom lip, your eyes still focused on the absent movements of your fingers on his chest. “And maybe you could actually call me first because you have my number.”

Frank chuckled beneath you, his arms wrapping around you tightly. A moment later you felt his lips placing a kiss to the top of your head.

“Think I like the sound of that, sweetheart,” he told you, glancing back down at you.

“Is that right?” you said, shooting him a teasing grin.

A bark of laughter flew out of Frank, the sound causing you to join in with him. He looked more handsome with the way his face was lit up right now, the largest smile you’d ever seen on his face seemingly permanently residing on it right now. And in that moment, lying in your bed laughing with him, your eyes locked on each other’s, one thought ran through your mind.

All those months of waiting for this moment with him had been worth it.

#frank castle x reader #frank castle x you #frank castle smut #frank castle #the punisher #frank castle x f!reader #frank castle fluff

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ofmdlovelyletters · 26 days

Text

💌 Welcome to OFMD Lovely Letters! 💌

This blog is intended to be a space that celebrates Our Flag Means Death and its incredible fandom. While the show may have been canceled, its impact continues. There are still more stories to tell, more art to draw, more gif sets and edits to create. There will still be cons and meet ups. There will still be new fans discovering the show every day. There will still be friendships to be made, and existing friendships will continue to grow stronger.

In short, this fandom isn't going anywhere.

But right now we’re all at various stages of being mentally devastated, and as a wise captain once said, the best thing we can do is talk it through as a crew. That’s where OFMD Lovely Letters comes in.

How does it work?

Ask Box: Is there someone you think deserves a lovely letter? Someone who really makes you smile, who makes your time in this fandom better? Maybe they’ve written a story that makes your heart sing, or made a shitpost that you’re still laughing about days later, or they’ve been a really good friend to you when you’re in your blanket fort era. Maybe they’re a blorbo from your notes and you just feel good seeing their URL all the time. Use the ask box (on or off anon) to send them a lovely letter. We’ll tag them when we post the note in hopes it’ll give them a smile. And if you see the post in the wild, interact with it! Shower that person with more love and remind them that you’re happy they’re here.

Submission Box: Is there a post you’ve written or that you’ve seen on your dash that you think would help improve the general vibe around here? Submit it via the submission box. We’ll be looking for posts that celebrate fandom (specifically OFMD) and the positive impact it’s had on people’s lives.

Please note: all messages will be moderated. We want this to be a safe space ship for everybody.

Our hope is this blog will be an avenue to spread love and positivity throughout the fandom, through these lovely letters as well as some low-pressure events we’re planning for the future. If you have any ideas, please don’t hesitate to reach out.

Long may we roam. 💕

#ofmd #our flag means death #intro post #pinned post

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fillinforlater · 1 year

Text

Dr. Minji

Male Reader x Kim Minji

Length: 1127 words

Tags: prostate exam, fingers up your bum, semen sample, also called cock sucking, p-gasm, anal, butt stuff, riding a dildo, loud sex, proffesional_doctor!Minji

TW: butt stuff with the reader, also Quickie

Inspiration: @worldsover who wrote the prompt and inspired me to go for it, @kaedespicelatte who just says random shit and IT WORKS lmao

Credit: @worldsover for editing. Thank you!

“Bend over.”

Swallow the enormous lump in your throat. You were mentally prepared for the worst, a weird, ugly male doctor shoving his fingers up your ass and rubbing your prostate. For the sake of your health, yes, you would do it. But as it turns out, Dr. Minji is definitely not ugly and most certainly not a man. She is a cold killer, her gaze unimpressed as she watches your face fill with blood. A sigh comes from her lips as she grabs her gloves.

“Sir, I have a lot of patients waiting. I’m sure your prostate is fine, but if you want to get it checked, we should not waste time.”

“I, uhm, uh…”

You stutter, you sweat. Dr. Minji is enveloped in this imposing aura. The way she stretches the white gloves on her fingers looks menacing, as if she is about to murder you without leaving traces. From a drawer, she grabs a tube with lube and places it on her desk. Another sigh.

“Sir, I—”

“I-I’ll do it, sorry.”

You interrupt her and scramble to open your belt. Fiddle at it for a second that feels endless. Your pants fall to the floor and soon your boxers follow. Although you try to hide your cock throughout the process, the doctor certainly caught a glimpse of it. Life is cruel.

“Okay then,” Dr. Minji says, her voice disinterested, yet softer than before, “I need you to relax now. I know this is hard, but it is necessary, okay?”

“Yes,” you say in between labored breaths and bend further down. You expected her to move behind you, but Dr. Minji decides to kneel in front of you. Her fingers, cold and covered with glove and lube, dart through the opening of your legs and search for your puckered hole.

Your entire forehead is a sea of sweat. You wish you could wipe all these beads away, but both of your hands are occupied: the left gives you stability on Minji’s desk; the other hides your manhood. You have to suffer through this ticklish feeling on your temple as Minji tickles your butthole. It’s still too tight for her to insert a finger, and the coldness of her glove doesn’t help.

Suddenly, one of the many salty beads loses its grip and falls down on the doctor’s face. It leaves a wet trail on her cheek and she looks upwards, straight at you. Her disinterested, unimpressed expression has not changed, even though you're looking at her with the most pitiful, disgusting contortion of a face imaginable. With yet another sigh, she gets up from her knees and grabs something from the drawer.

“Sir, let me show you how it’s done,” she says bluntly and plants a massive, suction dildo onto the tiled floor. You gawk at the absolute insane length, and for a second, fear that it is meant for you. That is before Minji pulls down her pants and steps out of them. No panties to speak of. No hair as well, her legs, crotch and pussy are smooth masterpieces.

“Come closer,” Minji commands, while putting a healthy amount of lube on the silicone phallus. As you carefully shuffle forward, Minji strokes the fake dick a couple of times and then squats down. Like the professional that she is, she takes it up her ass with no effort.

“Fuck,” the two of you groan. Before you know it, Minji has slapped away your hand. Your cock has already become erect at the sight of seeing this young, attractive doctor half naked, so there is no use hiding it anymore. Quite frankly, you do not care anymore as Minji starts to slowly go up and down on the silicone monster.

She once again reaches for your butthole, but this time, she won’t be denied.

Her finger pierces you open. No time for it to adjust to Minji; it’s time for you to learn what the doctor is showing you. Relax, relax, and take it up there without whining. Whine you do, however, at her first touch of your prostate. From that moment, you feel things spiral out of control.

"Also, I'll need a sperm sample,” Dr. Minji says, her breath quicker than before.

"What for?" you respond with less confusion than you would hope for. Minji reaches for your hard shaft.

"Me."

That's how a good doctor multitasks: she's sitting on that silicone dick, taking it in her guts while being more thorough with her prostate exam. Her finger not only grazes your prostate, it begins to poke it. The friction of her in and out movements makes your knees quiver, and every touch on your sensitive organ fills your mind with fog.

"I'll have to make sure the taste is normal too,” Minji bluntly adds and goes from just staring at your length to putting her lips onto it. But when did they learn about kissing the tip in medical school? Of course she is an expert in anatomy, but this knowledge is not part of the curriculum, right?

Even though her gloves are cold, her tongue's certainly warm enough to make it feel all better. It makes you relax. The pleasure is a comfortable couch and you just lay down on it—perfect for Minji to carefully ease another finger up your rectum. The double attack on your prostate leaves you with gritted teeth and an unhealthy amount of precum on Minji’s taste buds.

"It's okay, this amount of precum is normal with all the stimulation," the doctor gives her medical expertise, interrupted by moans.

So this is where the distrust of doctors comes from: you're absolutely leaking from the slit of your dick. How normal can this be? It's a test of all your senses, the fingers in your asshole, the lips around your frenulum, the sight of Minji slowly bouncing up and down—what happened to sterility? Oh, it's gone now that she's drooling; you might as well be too.

Let's call it doctor-patient confidentiality, how she swallows your semen sample, even as the orgasm keeps going, doesn't let any of the seed go to waste as the orgasm keeps going and going, because your ass is clenching hard around her cold gloved fingers—can't let there be any evidence, can't let it show up on a black light. The orgasm is so intense, you have to bite down on something: Minji offers a finger—oh, is that—you almost cared, until you start watching Minji's ass ripple too in her own orgasm, so your lips wrap around her digit as you throw your head back and give Minji much more than a sample of semen in her mouth. The whole clinic must have heard that one. Better hope the walls are soundproofed well.

#kpop smut #girl group smut #female idol smut #kim minji smut #newjeans minji smut #newjeans smut #male reader insert #male reader #male reader smut

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ecstasyhighway · 30 days

Text

You & I | E.Williams

chapter i

CW, ellie is a pervert here she watches the reader masturbate… there is smut towards the end guys (im not good at smut but i tried my best) masturbation (reader and ellie) , stalking, y/n is used

this might be straight cheese ngl…im not good at ts 😭 but enjoy ig

wc: 1.4k

read the prologue here ch 2

———————

“Hi! Hello”

A voice chimes from behind her, she turns around, and a lump forms in her throat.

it's…you.

Ellie quickly clears her throat and begins to talk, her eyes scanning your features. She is infatuated with you, you’re gorgeous, ethereal even…

“hi sorry how may I help you?”

“Yes, do you guys happen to have 21’s new album?”

you ask so sweetly, Ellie watches you speak, your oh-so-beautiful smile just making her want to fall to her knees. Ellie signals you to follow her, heading back to the rap section of the store, her eyes scan the shelves as she looks for the album, She reaches up and pulls out the ‘American Dream’ and hands it to you.

“This one?”

You smile and giggle a little, “Yes! this is exactly what I've been looking for… I couldn’t find it anywhere else I've looked all over thank you um…?” You trail off looking for a name tag, “..Ellie, thank you”

Ellie smiles, her face feeling warm, she knows she's red as fuck right now and her feeling embarrassed about it is just making her even more flustered “Y-yeah no problem, is that all? I can ring you up over here” She chuckles softly trying to cover the anxiety in her voice.

You and Ellie head towards the register, she rings you up and you hand her your card. Ellie examines your card trying to get your name, she needs to know, she knows nothing about you, just some things like you like 21 savage and Tyler. But that’s not nearly enough, she needs to know everything about you, things even you don’t know about yourself...

“y/n? That's a really pretty name” She smirks and takes a mental note of your first and last name, she will most definitely be looking you up later.

“oh thank you so much!” you say with joy in your voice, “I might come back another time, I uhh really like music and I really want to learn how to play an instrument so maybe I’ll see you again?” you ask so innocently, Ellie, on the other hand, was freaking out on the inside, she just thought you were so gorgeous and she needed to know more about you and she needed you to come back

“yeah, uhm I teach acoustic guitar, and piano so if you ever want lessons just show up, I'm here pretty much all the time, haha yeah this store is actually my life and-“ She cuts herself off realizing she's just rambling about nothing. “sorry yes you will definitely see me again” she is mentally cursing at herself for being such a nervous wreck in front of you.

“awesome, I’ll see you laters Ellie” and with that, you turn around and focus your attention on your phone, a message dings and you begin typing away. Ellie noticed this and is already feeling a certain way.. do you have a boyfriend? girlfriend? Are you single..? its okay she’ll figure all that out.

Once Ellie’s shift was over she went down to her music room. She sat there for a second and put on some jazz, she grabbed her laptop and began her long and tedious search, y/n l/n, she scrolled through the search page filled with many other y/n l/n’s. she stops. ‘bingo’ she thinks to herself, she found you ‘y/n.oncam’ on pretty much everything. Luckily all your accounts are public, unluckily she notices that you literally post your entire life on the internet, ‘do you know how many creeps are on the internet? oh once I have you to myself no one will be able to ever know anything personal about you’ she scoffs.

Here's what she knows, you’re 20, you’re single, you like to read, and you lovee music.. you live in an apartment with a big window.

Wait, she knows that complex, yeah she knows where that is, it's right across the street from the bookstore Dina works at. Shit Dina! Ellie forgot that she promised to bring Dina a limited edition 2Pac vinyl she had in storage. Ellie jumped up, grabbed her jacket, went to the storage to grab the record. She gets in her car and heads to Dina’s bookstore.

‘D are you still at work?’

‘yes’

‘I'm bringing the record rn’

*Dinabina like a message*

Ellie arrived at the bookstore, the words ‘Hidden Pages’ flickering softly as one of the letters had gone out. Ellie walks into the store and walks up to Dina, who is reading.

“D, I got the record”

“yayy thank you Ellie” Dina walks up to her smiling and gives her a hug “I’ll give it back as soon as I'm finished listening to it”

Ellie said her goodbyes and left the store.

She looks around trying to find the apartment, she found it. ‘Havenwood apartments’ She walks to the tall building and examines it and she spots the only big window, no curtains, lights on, and a woman's figure dancing around. She gets closer to the building, not too close but close enough to see into the window. Sure enough, it's you, dancing and singing, oblivious to the world around you, if you would just stop and look out of your window you would see Ellie, watching you closely, biting her lip and just enjoying the view of you.

You had gotten tired, turned off the music and began getting ready for bed. Oh, but that feeling between your legs was getting stronger, you tried to ignore it, you’ve been pent up and so busy lately, mostly because of work and shit. ‘Fuck’ you curse quietly to yourself and you head to your couch, you slip your hands down your pants and begin rubbing circles on your clit, dipping your fingers into your hole and gathering your juices to add more lubrication. Your eyes close and as you add pressure to your throbbing clit, you feel yourself bucking your hips for more friction. Fingers pumping in and out of your hole. Your other hand fondling your soft tits, adding more stimulation ‘mmph fuck’ The noises coming from your mouth are almost pornographic, your neighbors could probably hear you as the walls are thin. You feel yourself getting closer so you begin moving faster your mouth forming an ‘O’ shape “Mmpfh shit’m gonna cum fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck” You get that feeling in your stomach and let yourself go, your orgasm hitting you like a truck, you continue rubbing your clit riding out your orgasm, legs shaking from the overstimulation. Once you’re done you sit up and head to the bathroom to clean yourself up and you go to your bed to watch a show, you feel so comfortable and safe in the warmth of your bed so, you drift off into a slumber…

Oh but little did you know. You weren’t alone. Ellie saw what you were doing, she saw your most intimate moment and you didn't even notice you were being watched. Like she thought you were oblivious to the world around you, a normal person would sense another watching them, but not you…or maybe you knew she was watching and you put on a show for her and only her. Ellie’s hand reaches to unbutton her jeans, reaches her hand into her underwear, and begins rubbing her clit to the thought of you, your body, your pussy just begging to be touched by her, your soft tits and your skin needing to be marked by her…she needs you so bad.. just as she’s about to come undone. an elderly opens the door behind her, luckily Ellie had her back turned so the lady didn’t see her pleasuring herself to you. Ellie saw that the lady had many bags and offered to help her.

“Can you call a cab for me dear, they all just speed right passed me?” the woman asked kindly, and Ellie did what she asked, grabbing the cab’s attention and opening the door for her, all with a smile and her juices dripping down her thighs. The cab leaves and Ellie walks to her car.. “why were you touching yourself out in public while watching an oblivious girl masturbate..you’re so fucking weird.. fuck Ellie what the fuck, you need to be more careful, that could’ve not gone in your favor…” she whispered to herself, her cheeks red from embarrassment. She gets in her car and heads to her apartment….

——————————

idk what a tag list is but someone said “need to be in the taglist” and my gf said that means they wanna be tagged when the next part comes out so yeah

🏷️ @vqxen

#—ecstasyhighway #ellie smut #ellie williams smut #ellie williams #tlou smut #tlou2 smut #smut #lesbian #wlw #wlw smut #ellie x fem reader #ellie the last of us #ellie is so hot #i need her so fucking bad #nah imma do my own thing #ellie tlou #ellie tlou smut

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navaldiver · 6 months

Text

The Life of a Successful Fan

TW: Sexual Slavery, Piss drinking, Slight Scat, Slight Feet worship, Femdom.

A/N: OMG life took a real toll on me and my mental health was in the dumpster for quite a while. Finally got back to writing and got this out for you guys. I'm so sorry that I've been MIA as of late, but will try to post more.

Barely edited, and proceed with caution!! Read the tags before reading!!

It's six a.m. and the alarm on your phone rang. You stirred from the cot on your floor, rubbing your eyes and silently stretching until you hit a state of nirvana from that one particular pulled muscle. You were never a morning person, but for Chaewon, well you will be whatever she asks from you. And one of Chaewon's first requests after you decided to devote your life to her was to be her human alarm clock. Finally awake enough, you climbed out of the mattress and headed toward your master's room.

Opening the ornate wooden door, you were met with a sight that you could never get tired of despite seeing it every day. Kim Chaewon in all her naked glory, lay sprawled on the bed, the contour of her ass could be visibly seen even under the thick sheets. You gulped, knowing full well your Master's needs come first before your own. You are her slave after all. With another firm gulp, you suppressed your urges and crawled your way underneath the sheets to wake up your Master the only way you were supposed to.

"Good morning Master." You whispered, as you stroke the soft yet firm skin of her ass with your fingers, gently pulling the cheeks apart as you snuggle up against the tender skin right by the rectum, already fluttering in excitement as to what comes next. It is tempting to swipe your tongue against it, but you know better than to do something you are not supposed to. And besides, there'll be ample time for that later. You shift your face that much closer, pressing your own cheeks against her cheeks like you're in love with her ass. Which you probably are to be honest.

And just the way you knew she would, Chaewon shifted a little, pressing her ass into your face slightly as she reached over to pet your hair. You reciprocated as you shifted that infinitesimal distance closer to her ass in your own display of affection. With a murmur and a tug to your hair, she lets you know that it is time to move on to the next part of your morning routine. You retreat back under the covers, allowing her room to flip onto her back and spread her legs, propping her feet on either side of the bed and giving you a clear view of her pussy in front of you. You used to muse at the fact that the Kim Chaewon's pussy was so accessible to you, yet so desired and mysterious to those so desperate for her. But now, her glorious folds stared back at you, giving you a verbal command that it demands tribute. You heed its call as you wriggled on your belly, hands placed on the outside of her thighs and you pressed your mouth to her pussy, meticulously forming a seal with your lips as you flatten your tongue. You waited patiently for your first drink of the day, as Chaewon played with your hair, twirling and plucking at it as she waited for her own body to respond to her mental order.

With a strong hand, Chaewon grabs a fistful of your hair and lets out a sigh of relief and starts pissing, straight into your mouth. The flow is intense but the taste is familiar and nostalgic as you gulp it down without missing a beat. It did take you a while to reach this level of sucking down Chaewon's piss. Initially, you struggled to even cope with the taste of her piss but after a few stern beatings, you gargled down her piss like a pro.

As the stream finally stopped, you detached your mouth and licked your lips, before struggling out from under the covers and sinking onto the floor, greeting your master on your knees.

"Good morning Master."

"Good morning slave." Chaewon sat upright on the bed as you propped up a pillow for her. As a small reward, she leaned over and gave you some of her morning spit. You gratefully opened your mouth and accepted the gift, which earned a chuckle from your master. Chaewon giggled at the thought that now your belly is mixed with her urine and now her spit. She yawned and stretched, before she finally got off the bed and headed off to the bathroom. You followed behind her, on your hands and knees.

Chaewon picked up the toothbrush you had already prepared for her, while you peppered kisses all over her feet. She loves it, the feeling of being adored and pampered to the most extreme, and you love showering your master with all the devotion and attention you can spare. From the corner of your eye, you could see Chaewon was done brushing her teeth. You quickly crawled over to the next station of the morning, the toilet bowl. You see, when you signed that contract to be Chaewon's personal 'assistant', it included that you take care of anything that would bother her. And this includes her personal business.

"You better clean me up good, I have a long schedule ahead of me today and I don't want my ass to bother me." Chaewon growled as she sat on the toilet backwards, her ass facing you as you kneel in front of it. You nuzzle into her ass cheek and press a kiss to it, your own way of acknowledging what was to come.

A cute grunt and a whoosh of gas later, you see her asshole start to dilate and you start kneading the flesh around her ass, acting as some encouragement as she strains against the cistern. Soon, you could see a greasy brown log appearing from her asshole. You shifted your hands from her ass to her inner thighs, palming and massaging the flesh as you patiently waited for Chaewon.

"Mmmm, such a good slave for me." Chaewon mutters as your massage was hitting the right spots, as the log stuck in her ass finally breaks off and falls into the toilet. Chaewon makes more soft, guttural noises as she pushes more logs out, as you stay kneeling in front of her ass, massaging her until she's done. She leans forward a little more, her asshole gaping and inviting you toward the next step of your morning routine. You took a deep breath and closed your eyes, pressing your tongue and dragging it all over her brown-smudged asshole. The taste is as bad as one could imagine, but you obviously weren't doing it for the taste. You were doing it because of Chaewon, because this is what she needs and what she demands. So, you carefully and diligently lap her clean, listening to her praises and swelling with pride. Your favourite compliment was that you were the 'best toilet paper' she's ever used. You chuckled a little at that one, as she got off the toilet bowl and headed back into the room.

"Come slave, help me get dressed." Chaewon pulled out a long-sleeved crop top, a miniskirt and a pair of thigh-high leather boots from her dresser and tossed them at your face as she sat down back on the bed. You mused for a moment at the colour choice. It was all pink, her favourite colour. You slid the miniskirt onto Chaewon, tightening it at the hips, before helping her tie her boots as she wore the top herself.

"I have to go now. But as a reward for your good performance today, you get to kiss my boots." She said as she pressed the soles of her boots against your face. You happily lapped up at the soles like the dog you are, before she finally kicks your face away and heads out.

"I'll be back after midnight slave, use this to keep yourself entertained while I'm gone." Chaewon threw a used sock at your feet as she slammed the door behind her. You heard the familiar beep of the electronic door lock, meaning that she has already left the house. You stared at the sock in front of you, picking it up like it was your most prized possession.

"Thank you Master." You bowed even if Chaewon had been long gone. You heard your phone ring in your room. You rushed over to see if Chaewon had left something behind, but it was just that your brother had called you once again for the umpteenth time. You immediately cancelled it, and looked at the sock lovingly in your arms. This is your new life now, and you are loving every moment of it.

#kim chaewon smut #kpop smut

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golbrocklovely · 6 months

Text

cultish love // colby brock

A/N: first off, so sorry for this being so late, i had a lot of things i had to edit about this fic. also this is my longest fic ever ! like the other fic before this, this is a AU version of colby… where he, you guessed it, is a cult leader. and he is also corrupt (but like aren't all cult leaders). again this deals with some possible heavy themes, so give a good read of the trigger warnings before reading ahead. i've always joked about colby being able to lead a cult, and that's basically where this idea came from. this fic also took a turn i wasn't expecting, but i like it anyway. also the first half is written as a journal entry (all italized) and then the rest is an actual fic (not italized). lmk what you think, and happy haunting !

prompt: you're a journalist, and your next big story is on the 'empathic love' cult, led by none other than colby brock. this cult is not known well, but you are getting a first hand look at them and what they do. and quickly, colby takes a liking to you. || fem!reader x AU!cult leader!colby brock

trigger warning: SMUT, no actual sex but you do get mentally fucked (it will make sense in the story), cult vibes all around, love bombing, cursing, supernatural powers, colby is very intense and kinda scary but also still his charming self, slight dubcon similar in vain to sam's story - you never say no outright, but you do have general feelings of 'wtf is this, idk if i like' so if that's too much for you, feel free to read something else :), colby's aura is crazy good at giving you visions, strangers-to-soulmates?? don't know if that's a tag lol, also…. colby's technically bisexual in this????? but like barely

word count: 8610

I've been a reporter for only five years, and this story.... it could make or break my career. Cults aren't as prevalent as they once were way back when. They still exist, just in the shadows. A lot quieter on most fronts. Usually disguised as a business or religion, for tax reasons of course. But this cult, Empathic Love, is unlike any cult I've heard of.

Of course, they don't call themselves a cult, but that's what they are. How else would you describe a bunch of randos following one man around wherever he goes?

They only started so many years ago, right before I graduated university. The main founder, Colby Brock, is a pragmatic individual, according to his followers. The cult began blowing up in my town a little over two years ago, and now people flock from all over the world to visit the Love Compound. You would think it's Disney World the way people grow excited about it.

But I am here to get to the truth of this cult. What is their motive? What are they planning to do? Will this be another Waco or Heaven's Gate? What sinister beliefs hide underneath the modern-day hippie aesthetic they show?

These notes will document everything I experience for the next couple of days. And in case I go missing, these are my proof of who's to blame.

I don't think it will go that far, but you can never be too sure.

~~~~

Day 1 - Investigation

I'm still incredibly surprised I was allowed to come onto the Love Compound. The leader himself apparently reached out to my boss and told them that they wanted someone to come down and interview the group. They allow visitors from time to time, "new recruits" as some of the townspeople call them, but reporters have never been allowed in. Not once. Until me.

Driving up to the compound was nerve-wracking. I never imagined I would be nervous; I've interviewed plenty of criminals in my years, have done full blown investigations into scary, horrifying crimes. But something about this place freaked me out. Partially because I didn't know what I was getting into. But another part of me, and I will never admit this out loud, felt... at home.

The only promise I made to myself was I wouldn’t drink any kool-aid while there. So, I plan to stick to that. Pretend my previous statement never existed.

I was greeted by a beautiful woman when I got there: Avery. No one went by last names. And some apparently changed their names altogether, which was not surprising. My guess is there were most likely criminals hanging out amongst the group. But I had no proof of that, just a hunch. It easily could be a safe haven for those wanting to escape whatever life they had before.

The compound was three Victorian style mansions connected to each other and had a decent size farm attached - about 222 acres. Avery told me about all of the vegetables and chickens they farmed. Everything was organic and used up as often as possible. Anything that couldn't be eaten or produced too much for the only 100ish people in the compound, was sold at the farmer's market or given away to the local food bank. Avery explained to me very clearly that everyone in the compound chipped in one way or another. Some still worked normal jobs, but just lived here with everyone. But she noted that Colby hoped in the near future no one would have to work at all and they would be self-sufficient in a couple years.

A cult with future plans? Almost unheard of.

I told Avery that I was given an all-access pass to ask anything I wanted to, and nothing I asked could be ignored or deflected. She agreed to an interview. I recorded all of it, but here are the highlights of what I gathered.

I asked her why Colby was such a secretive man. There were very few photos of him that did exist out there, but all that was rumored about him was his alluring eyes and generally attractive presence. She agreed that he was handsome, describing his as having "ocean blue eyes" and his voice was to die for. "Deep and arousing", as she explained.

I noted that she seemed almost lost in thought at the idea of him, like she was envisioning him directly in front of her. Strange behavior; but not for a cult follower. Many end up falling in love with their leader, believing they have a genuine relationship with said person.

I bought up the name of the group, Empathic Love, and said it felt a little too inviting. She laughed and told me that it was right on the money - the best way to describe why everyone was there. She expressed to me that so many of Colby's followers wanted peace and love and light, and that being in this group felt like that. It was rewarding to be surrounded by those that cared and wanted to see each other succeed. Life outside the walls of the compound was rough, scary, draining; but inside, it was all love.

Call me cynical, but I don't believe that for a second. It took all the strength I had to keep from rolling my eyes at her. But I could tell from her voice, her motions... she was telling the truth. Well, her truth.

I wanted to know what brought her here, so she spoke of her previous life. She was abused growing up, moved around a lot in foster care. She was almost homeless, and then one day she ran into Colby. He had just begun the Empathic Love group, and she just knew she had to stick with him. Her life immediately turned around the moment he was in her life. The adoration in her eyes told me a different story, so I pressed her - "are you and Colby... together?" She smiled and said no, but she knew that they were life partners before, just not currently.

Oh... so it's one of those types of cults.

She said that Colby doesn't have a second in command, wife, girlfriend, whatever. Everyone is equal and heard. He's just the face of the group, which is a bit ironic given even I have no clue what he looks like. I knew he was young, in his mid-20s. But other than that, no idea.

I needed to know, why stay? What keeps you here? A dreamy look came over her, like she had said this a million times before: "Colby. He is love, and that's all anyone could ask for."

Chills ran up my spine at the tone of her voice. It was dull, and her words sounded like a mantra, the way she said them so easily.

I wrapped up my interview with her, quiring if I was allowed to interview others. She said yes and began sending over random people one-by-one to me.

If I hadn't gotten chills from her first, I would have from everyone else. Something about seeing everyone saying similar things, smiling happily, like the ship isn't sinking around them was eerie. It made my stomach churn when I would ask questions I already asked Avery, and get almost the same speech back.

I interviewed about 15 people. All variety of ages and genders. I suddenly realized that there were no children around, and everyone was over the age of 21.

Consenting adults… minus the supposed brainwashing.

A couple of the interviewees stuck out to me:

Penelope, 25. Her upbringing was similar to Avery's, but she still kept in contact with her family. Apparently, she wasn't the only one like that either. Many still kept in touch and even visited their loved ones. I asked her to describe Colby, tell me anything about him. She giggled, almost like a schoolgirl, and began to weave such a story about him. He was kind and caring. His smile was contagious, just like his laugh. And his singing voice was fantastic. She talked about him like he was a boy band member, and she was his biggest fan. I asked her to give one word to describe him, and she said "Love. He is love, and that's all anyone could ask for."

Greg, 36. He had fallen into rough times, and desired a fresh start. He had heard about this group online, and figured checking them out while he was in town wouldn't hurt. And that was a couple years ago. I wondered why he didn't feel weird listening to someone that was younger than him, and he shrugged. It was nice not having eyes on him. He loved being in a wallflower, and he believed that Colby deserved all the love he got from everyone in the group. Every ounce he got was ten-folded back into the group. Greg had never felt so connected to a group of people and he knew it was all thanks to Colby. "He brought love into my life like I never have had it before. Because that's who he is: love."

Heather, 29. She mentioned how for most of her life she felt like shit. Her confidence was at an all-time low when she met Colby. He encouraged her to keep at it, to love herself and find happiness everywhere. And by spending more and more time with him, she did. She has never felt more confident about herself, her life, her direction, and Colby is the reason for that. The tone that took over her voice when she bought him up was odd. It was very similar to a partner describing the love of their life, almost like wedding vows. I asked her haphazardly about her love life, how that was going for her. And she told me she had been on many dates - something she never used to do back when she was younger or before Colby. But she did note that regardless of who she ends up with, she knows that a part of her heart will always belong to Colby. They were connected, forever. "Love and light and happiness is what I desired, and I got it - all because Colby exists in my life now."

It felt like I was getting nowhere with some of these interviews. Many said the same thing, Colby being love and light and blah blah blah. I wanted someone that wasn't gonna just quote to me whatever mantra he made them learn. And luck was on my side, because I was able to interview their newest member, Ash. They were 23, and very beautiful. There was an almost smugness about them, like they knew they were the shiny new toy on the block. The confidence only a young 20-something year old could have.

I asked them, point blank, about Colby. Be brutally honest. They told me he was hot, and that's what drew them to him. They liked the idea of living in a group setting, especially since they grew up with many brothers and sisters. They liked helping out, and they liked knowing that Colby was keeping an eye on them the most recently. I then followed up with how long it took for them to join the group. "Three days. That's how long it takes for everyone."

I questioned them about the "Colby is love" thing, and they agreed it was a bit strange, but they couldn't help but feel the same way as everyone else. They were like a moth to a flame when it came to him. Everything about him was hypnotizing, entrancing. It was like staring at the sun; even though you knew to look away, you just couldn't help it.

Then I had to know: were they sleeping with him? Most of these cults feed off of the leader fucking every person they wanted to and leaving other members high and dry. But for some reason, it felt as if Colby was sleeping with everyone with the way they all talked about him. Ash dissented, saying no one was sleeping with him. He didn't sleep with any of his followers. But they all shared a deep, sensual mental connection with him. They felt like, sometimes, he was in their soul. And that sensation alone was euphoric, bordering on orgasmic. They also knew that in another life, they would have been together, similar to what Avery said.

It was then I knew that this group was clinically insane, or just really infatuated by what Colby was selling. It had to have been some crazy brainwashing. But it was odd; people were allowed to leave, to see loved ones, to have lives outside of the compound walls. Hell, some had dating lives that included those not here! That's unheard of, and completely stupid on Colby's part if he wants to keep things going.

A cult leader that wanted to watch his world implode.... I had to meet him. I had to meet the myth that was Colby Brock. And tomorrow I get my chance to.

~~~~

Day 2 - Interview with Colby

I feel the need to explain that these are my notes, not really meant for anyone else to see. And really, the only reason anyone would be seeing this is if I disappear or got murdered.

So, I say all of that just so I know, for myself, that this is a safe space for me to express my truest emotions and thoughts after interviewing Colby.

And all I can say, honestly, is that... I get it. I understand it now.

I felt my nerves hit their break last night before going to sleep, unable to stop my mind reeling from what was to come. I ended up bringing along a bodyguard, or really a photographer. I had known Trey since I started working as a journalist, and I knew I could rely on him to get us out of the Empathic Love compound if anything went south. I wasn't sure what I was up against when I went to interview Colby, but God... I didn't think I was so underprepared.

I met him in his office, Avery walked me over to it. It was up in the attic of the third house. It overlooked the entire property with wide windows. For an attic, I expected it to feel dark and dusty, but surprisingly it was light and airy. Almost like being out in the woods and taking a deep breath.

Colby was sitting in his main office chair. He spun around to see us, a light smile on his face. I'll be honest - I was taken aback by his beauty. I understood Ash's whole spiel about him being attractive and looking at him was like looking at the sun. It was intense. He was intense. His blue eyes bore into me, almost like they could see through me. I felt chills, but they weren't of fear. It was out of... excitement, of awe.

He greeted me, giving me a warm handshake. I hate to admit that I almost blushed at the sound of him saying my name. I had to take a couple deep breaths before starting. Avery left the room, and Trey sat outside the door, in case of backup.

I recorded our interview, knowing that I couldn't keep track of everything he said. But listening back to it now, his voice.... it's like a song. A beautiful, spellbinding song. I could almost fall asleep to it....

I asked him about his life, and how he came to be a leader for a group like Empathic Love. He spoke of his upbringing lightly, barely scraping the surface. He talked about growing up pretty normally, having a loving family, a great friend group, and then one day realizing that he could make a change in the world. That many people loved him and loved being around him. And that's when he knew that if he could make their lives better, he would. So, he started Empathic Love. Originally, it was just gonna be a safehouse for those that needed it. But then more and more people joined and suddenly, it grew into what it was today.

I asked where his family was now. "In Kansas," he told me. He said nothing further than that.

He humbly spoke of all the love he received from his followers, or his "friends" as he put it. They all cared about him in a way that he only wished he could return tenfold. I questioned him about the whole "Colby is love" thing. "How come everyone says almost the exact same thing, like they've been brainwashed into saying it?" He didn't even trip over his words as he spoke matter-of-factly to me. "I didn't come up with that phrase, they did. You would have to ask them. I take it as the highest form of a compliment, truly. I'll be honest, it's a bit embarrassing at times when they call me that, but I can't help what they do. I appreciate their love, nonetheless."

I continued asking him about different topics, until finally reaching the one I was most intrigued about. "How many of your followers - excuse me - friends, have you slept with?" He smirked, smirked, at me and said "None. Did any of them tell you that we slept together?"

"No, but the way they talk about you like the sun shines out of your ass does seem a bit odd, don't you think?"

He looked unphased. God, he had an answer for everything. "I'll be honest with you, some of my friends might be in love with me. But I make it abundantly clear that while I love them, and love their love, I don't have feelings for them. I'm still looking for the one."

I remember holding back a glare, "So, you're celibate?"

"Now, I never said that." He let out a chuckle, then his eyes darkened. "Why do you care so much about my sex life? Unless of course, you want to join it."

I tried ignoring his gaze and his words but stuttered through my next question. “Then who exactly is the right one for you, if it's not one of your followers or friends?”

It took him a while to answer, he even closed his eyes for a bit. He sat up once he knew, sauntering over to his window that overlooked it all. "I imagine the one for me is someone that will bring peace to me and my life. Someone that for all my faults, can see who I am truly deep down. She will love me, and I will worship her. I will show her what true love feels like. Our souls will be one, because they always have been."

Something strange came over me. I don't know why I said it, but I uttered, "What about looks?"

Who cares about looks! Why did I ask about looks? I was a serious journalist, not a reporter for Star Magazine!

He looked over his shoulder at me, "Looks aren't that important to me. What matters is mind and soul. Who you are deep down. But if I had to pick… someone like you. I feel someone like you would be a perfect fit around here."

I wanted to give him the sassiest voice and rebuttal I could muster, but deep down I was shaking. Energy raced through my body, like I had been electrified.

He kept his back to me, staring out the window. “I'm not trying to be overly complimentary. I'm just being honest. But I can tell that you would do so well to have us around. To have... me, in your life. I bring a lot of love to people's lives, that's for sure. But I also bring a lot of drive, and passion, and intimacy.”

Intimacy?

“People open up when I'm around. They tell me everything, even things they never dreamt of telling another person. And I allow it, because clearly, they needed to express it. And once they do, it's like the floodgates open. Love and light just start pouring into them, into their life, and it's overwhelming - but so worth it. Doesn't that sound nice?”

I guess so...

“I bring happiness to so many. My friends have told me that they get jittery around me, I'm like a shot of adrenaline. And that energy, that power, courses through them. And when it gets expressed, it comes out in…” He took a long pause, turning back to me. The look in his eyes… I can remember it as if he was still in front of me. “Pleasurable ways.”

I hate admitting this, and it's embarrassing to say it even now, but I felt a jolt of... something, run through me. I won't even say what it was out loud, in fear of never being taken seriously again. But what happened after that, I don't know if words can even express it well.

Colby continued talking, but I couldn't pick up on any of it. He was talking up a storm, but I couldn't help the sensations I was feeling. Even in my wildest of fantasies, I've never felt anything in reality. It was all in my mind. But in that very moment, it felt like it was happening to me.

I felt lips tread up my neck, stopping just below my ear. A hot, low moan breathed into my ear. My spine tingled at the sound, my hands gripping the armrests of the chair. If I didn't know any better, I would think Colby was behind me, making those noises. My hands suddenly felt hands on top of them. My eyes widened, looking down, but nothing was there. I couldn't really move my arms once the invisible hands were there. My whole body felt numb and heavy, relaxed. My mind was the one on edge, worried as to why I was feeling all of this.

I hadn't eaten or drank anything at the compound. Maybe it was being poured into the room by the vents? I don't know, but something was making me feel this way.

The invisible hands drifted up my arms, massaging my shoulders for a moment. My head lulled back, almost hitting the back of the chair. My mind was on high alert, but my body was about ready to fall asleep. The hands relaxed me so much that my eyes began to flutter.

But then... they drifted down my torso. They traced along my neck gently, drawing small, insignificant patterns. The hands grew lower and lower until they finally were on my chest. I felt the hands cup my breasts softly, my breath hitching in my throat. They kneaded my tits gingerly, my nipples hardening in my bra. I bit my lip, praying that I wouldn't make a sound. It was hard not to, especially when the delicate fingers of these invisible hands found my nipples, gently pinching them.

I remember closing my eyes tight. Trying to clear my mind. This wasn't actually happening to me. There was no way. This was a psychosis or a drug hallucination that was happening to me and Colby was doing nothing about it.

One hand drifted down my body, stopping right above my sex. I suddenly became very aware at how wet I was, my eyes widening. I felt a rush of blood flow through my cheeks. I was about to get caught. These invisible hands made me wet, and I couldn't stop them.

And the terrible thing was, I didn't want them to. I wanted them to finish the job. To get me off... in front of Colby. One hand rose back up my body, grabbing my neck and turning my face to look up at him.

A deep voice whispered harshly, "You want him, don't you?"

I didn't say anything, afraid of what would come out. But deep down, I knew.

"Say it, and it's yours. Say you want him. And he'll have you... forever."

I opened my mouth. I felt the words almost leave my lips. I stuttered out something. I closed my eyes, my body feeling high.

And then in a split second, it was all gone. The room grew quiet, and Colby cleared his throat. "Y/N, are you okay? You look flush."

I jolted out of my seat, being able to move freely again. I looked around and realized Colby was sitting once more, staring at me concerned. I finished the interview abruptly, saying I had everything I needed - even though I definitely didn't. And then he uttered words I wish I didn't hear.

"If you want, come back tomorrow. We are having a celebration here. I would love if you came by, even if for an hour."

I nodded, not even really taking in what he said, and left. Trey was confused as to why I bum-rushed out of the room, but I never told him the truth. How could I?

I knew deep down I shouldn't have said yes to go to the party. But getting that footage would be killer for my article. Interviews are great, but a party at a cult compound? That's bound to end terribly (for Colby, but great for me).

But something in me can't shake this feeling that I basically signed myself up for the end. End of what? I'm not sure. But I'll find out tomorrow.

~~~~~~

Stepping back onto the compound made my heart race. I was nervous as all hell, and just wanted this day to be over with already. Today was my last day doing this story. I was counting the minutes to when I could go back to my office and write about how this place was insane, or whatever narrative I planned to write.

I had enough proof that something was up here. All I needed to do was a bit more digging. And during the party is when I planned to do it.

Avery walked up to me, smiling brightly. "Hey, Y/N! How are you doing today?"

"I'm okay. I know it's a bit early, but Colby never specified when the party was going to take place." I replied.

"No, you're totally fine. The party is gonna happen later. Right now, though, we have something going on that you'll definitely want to see." She clapped excitedly.

"Oh? And what is that?" I questioned.

"We are inducting a new member!" she exclaimed giddily. "There's a whole process that we do, and everyone is involved. I imagine that will bode well for your article if you see it firsthand. It's all taking place in that tent."

I stared over at the huge tent, its plastic cover doors strangely inviting.

I hummed, "Sure, I'll be there in a moment."

Avery nodded, turning on her heels and prancing over to the tent, following in other members.

"What's happening in there?" Trey asked.

"Apparently they are inducting someone new into their cult." I informed him.

He blinked. "Group, you mean."

I rolled my eyes, "Yeah, whatever. Make sure to capture as much as you can."

He shook his camera, giving me a wink, "On it."

We both walked in, many members still up and around, giving everyone hugs and chatting. Avery waved me down, patting the seat next to her. I walked over and sat. My body tingled in anticipation. I wasn't sure what was going to happen. My breathing picked up as everyone grew silent, the doors opening. Colby walked in, and people rushed to their seats.

Colby called out, "Hello everyone, good morning."

"Good morning, Colby." Everyone said in unison.

Jesus, that was creepy.

"A lot of things are going to be different today. First, we have guests watching our festivities. Y/N and Trey. Everyone, give them a hand." He gestured to the two of us.

The tent exploded in applause, Avery evening rubbing my back sweetly. It felt like I was being congratulated on something I didn't achieve, my cheeks flushing at the acknowledgement.

"And secondly, sadly, the new member we were going to have decided not to stay." He frowned, his face dropping.

Members gasped, some audible "oh no" echoed around the tent. Colby nodded his head sympathetically. “I know, but fret not. I think this will be a learning experiment for our new guests. We can still do our traditional motions of having someone join us. But, imagine it as if it's a mock ceremony instead. Ms. Y/N, would you please step up here?”

My heart stopped when he looked into my eyes, the first time since yesterday. I glanced at Avery, who grinned enthusiastically. She pushed me out of my seat, my body following her lead. I gazed around, finding Trey, who pulled away from his camera with a concerned look. I stumbled up the walkway, stepping on stage with Colby.

Colby lowered his voice so I could only hear him, moving away from the microphone. "I know you wanted to know about how we induct someone into our little home, so I figured why not use you as an example? We aren't actually inducting you, in case you’re worried. This is just what would happen if you were joining. Are you okay with that?"

I gazed around the huge, white tent, making eye contact with many people in the audience. They all looked so eager, waiting to hear my response. Some were even shaking with excitement.

I stuttered, feeling Colby squeeze my hands to bring my attention back to him, "I-I guess so."

"Fantastic." He turned, still holding one of my hands, "Alright everyone, you know the drill."

The crowd cheered, suddenly many lining up to a microphone at the side of the stage. Colby lightly pulled me to a cushioned throne, sitting me down. "So here's what's going to happen. People are going to come up to that microphone, and they are going to give you plenty of love. Genuine love. And then the next person will go, and so on until everyone has spoken."

"Everyone here? Like, all hundred plus of you?" I whispered.

"Yes. It's gonna be a while, so get cozy." He laughed, rubbing my shoulders.

Time felt frozen as slowly everyone came up and said something nice about me. Some were quick, mostly just commenting on how nicely I dressed or how the stories I had covered in the past were interesting and thoughtful. But others, it's like they could see into my soul and point out the exact thing I was insecure about. Everyone was complimentary and it was nice, but exhausting.

The line had dwindled down, and the next person to speak was Avery.

She stepped up the microphone, giving me a huge smile. "Hi, Y/N. I know we don't know each other that well, but I feel like I've known you my whole life. These couple days of getting to know you, being interviewed by you, have just been the highlight of my life. You are such a lovely presence to be around, and you deserve all the success you've gotten these last couple years."

Lots of people in the crowd nodded, agreeing with Avery. She continued, taking a deep breath, "I wanted to add - you are so deserving of love. You are easy to love too, and I hope that you are surrounded by people that make you feel that way. I know that this is just a mock ceremony, but I truly believe you would be such a great addition to us. I know you don't trust us, but I hope that soon you will find that you have a safe place here. Even if you never come back here again. This is your home now, and forever will be."

My chest heaved suddenly, tears welling up in my eyes. What the fuck is happening right now? Why was I crying at what she said? Sure, it was sweet and kind, but... how did she know I needed to hear that?

I turned my head, wiping the tears before anyone could see them fall. The crowd clapped as Avery left, going back to her seat.

The last couple people were a blur, my mind still hanging onto Avery's words. Suddenly, a hand was placed on my shoulder, jolting me out of my thoughts. I gazed up, seeing Colby's beautiful face staring down at me.

"The ceremony is done. Now, time to party."

~~~~~~

It had been a couple hours since the ceremony, my body feeling almost numb but jittery all at the same time. It was hard to shake all the love and words that were thrown my way today. Sure, some were probably just lying and saying random things because they had to, because they were conditioned to. But it freaked me out how some just... hit the right spots, knew my insecurities.

The party itself was fine. Two of the houses had parties happening in them, and since all three houses were connected, you could leave one and walk into another. There was a dancefloor full of people, and multiple fully stocked bars. Tons of food was at each table. It honestly looked like an adult prom. But I wasn't in a partying mood. Trey, on the other hand, was enjoying himself immensely. Girls and guys surrounded him, laughing at his jokes and bringing him plates of food and wine. One girl kept rubbing his thigh, staring at him longingly.

I wanted to leave. I had had enough of today, and I just wanted to be as far away from Empathic Love as I could be. I decided fresh air was what I needed, so I got up and slid out the back door of one of the houses, taking a deep breath. There were still too many people around, but I noticed the last house, the one with Colby's office in it, had no lights on and no one around it. I walked through the yards, stopping once I was by the back porch of the third house.

I sighed, leaning back against a railing. I could still hear the party going on, almost getting louder now that I wasn't there. I shook my head, feeling overwhelmed.

“Hey, Y/N. Fancy seeing you here." Colby's voice broke through my thoughts.

I exhaled. “Hi, Colby.”

He cocked his head, “Are you doing okay? You seem... upset.”

I felt this sudden rush of anger, knowing in reality he was to blame for all of this. “No, I'm not doing alright. I want to go home, I'm extremely overwhelmed by this party and all the people around here. That ceremony was too much for me to deal with, and the only way for me to get out of here is Trey and he's getting rubbed down by your followers!”

He took a step back, putting his hands up defensively. “Woah, that was a lot. You must have needed that release.”

I glared, “You think?”

“Look, I get it. It's a lot to take in. I myself don't love going to all these parties. It can be really overwhelming and if I'm honest, it gives me a lot of anxiety,” he admitted casually.

“You get anxiety?” I scoffed, “How? Everyone here loves you.”

“I know. That's the stressful part!” He sat on the railing, turning to me. “I'm the leader of this family. I have to make all the right decisions, and sometimes that means upsetting some of the people closest to me. Not to mention, so many eyes are on me, and it's just all too much sometimes. Even if you think this group is a cult, I still care for everyone here. I make sure they are fed, have a job, and have a life outside of here. And that's a lot to take on.”

“How do you deal with all of it, then?” I questioned.

“Patience. And a lot of alone time when I can get it - through meditation, specifically,” he laughed. “I was actually going to go meditate before I found you. Would you like to join me?”

I shook my head. “No, I'm good.”

“Are you sure? Look, at the very least, it will get you away from the party and all the noise. You don't even have to join me, you can just... sit in the room with me while I do it.” He argued, shrugging his shoulders.

I gazed at the party, everyone had grew rowdier while we were talking, and I didn't even notice. But my head felt like it was spinning from the noise alone. I sighed, nodding my head. Colby smiled, opening the door to the house, and I walked in first. I followed him up to his office, sitting down on his couch as he sat in the center of the room on the floor.

I raised an eyebrow. “That's where you meditate?”

“Yeah, I know it's a bit silly. But I feel so much more grounded... on the ground.” He replied cheekily.

I snickered, sitting back and watching him. He crossed his legs, resting his palms on his knees. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He took multiple breaths until they were low and shallow. I furrowed my brow, my eyes never leaving his form.

It almost seemed like he was asleep, or in a hypnosis of some sort. He was completely still and silent. A dull glow appeared at the top of his head, growing brighter and larger. I leaned away from him, my eyes widening at the sight. What the fuck is that...?

An aura grew around him, surrounding him completely. He didn't move, unfazed by it. His eyes remained closed, and with each breath it grew.

"How... are you doing that?" I uttered, my mouth a gape.

"Doing what?" He spoke in a monotone voice.

"That... aura. How are you doing that?" I pressed.

“I've always been able to do it since I was young. You can get closer if you want to.” He suggested.

How did he know I was still far away?

I stepped off the couch, moving closer to him. I kept my distance, but the aura was almost pulling me in. It was beautiful, the light reflecting and growing bigger. I was almost engulfed by it, but it stopped right before getting to me. I could feel its warmth, its energy. It was calling to me, beckoning me to step towards it.

The aura wrapped around me, filling me with light and love. Or at least that's what it felt like. I gasped at the sensation, my legs shaking underneath me. I breathed in deeply, my lungs filling up with fresh air. I didn't feel like I was in the room anymore. I felt like I was flying, the world almost zooming around me.

“Let your body relax, Y/N. I know it's so much to take in.” Colby’s calming voice spoke.

I felt my body give out on me, falling onto the soft rug. I laid down on my back, staring up at the ceiling. Visions began to swirl in my mind and around me.

How is any of this happening?

He answered, reading my mind. “Because of me. Because of us. Because of the connection you and I share.”

My body felt very heavy, unable to move even if I wanted to. I could move my eyes, and out of the corner of them, I saw Colby stand up. The aura remained around us, almost engulfing the entire room.

“You know, I knew the moment you stepped foot on to the compound's grounds, you were going to like it here. You were going to stay.” He smiled sincerely, gazing down at my body.

I blinked, confused. “What? I-I don't plan to-“

He cut me off, “This is the final step, Y/N. Everyone gave you love, people celebrated you, and now... I'm allowing you in.”

I wanted to shake my head, but couldn’t. “But I don't want to join.”

He chuckled, “Yes you do. If you didn't want it, none of this would have worked on you. You wouldn't be seeing what is directly in front of your eyes.”

The visions morphed around me, suddenly showing Colby and I. But we weren't us, we were different people, at a different point in time. But I could feel it was us. We were in love, growing a family together. Our lives were beautiful.

What the fuck is this?

“That is our past, or present, or future,” he winked. “The thing is, Y/N, I never seek out anyone. They all seem to find me.”

“That's not true, you emailed my boss about being interviewed.” I remarked.

"Oh, you are so forgetful, Y/N. You emailed us, begging to interview me and anyone else that said yes. I only agreed because I knew you wanted to meet with me. You sounded very eager to join in your email." Colby pulled out a piece of paper, reading from it happily, "Dear whoever reads this, I'm hoping to score an interview with your group, Empathic Love, for an article I am writing. I would love to meet Colby, and really pick apart his brain on why he created said group. Maybe I could even join if you guys win me over. Please let me know if any of this sounds of interest to you. Sincerely, Y/N of Global Gazette."

He leaned down, staring into my eyes mischievously, "Now does that sound like someone that didn't want to be here?"

My heart raced, suddenly scared. “Why don't I remember writing that?”

“I couldn't tell you. All I know is you wanted to be here. And there's a reason for it.” He sat down on the ground next to me. I wanted to get up and run, but my body stayed still, heavy. “Growing up, I realized very early on that certain people just... gravitated to me. A lot of women, yes. But really it was anyone. And not only did they gravitate towards me, they became obsessed with me. At first, I was confused, uninterested in ever going through that. Who wants someone obsessed with them? But then I realized how much good I could do with so many people rallying behind me.”

He continued, “As I got older, my ability, or power, or whatever it is - grew twice as strong. Suddenly, all the people around me followed me, did anything and everything I could ask for. Then, I began getting visions, and I understood why this was the case. Everyone here: we had a past life together. Their souls and mine have always been connected. They find me and then continue to stay. And almost always, they fall in love with me. It's just so glorious.”

“You're insane.” I mumbled.

He hummed, “Interesting, especially since you’re seeing the same things I am.”

It was true. The whole time he spoke, I saw vision after vision of our past lives together. We were always destined to meet, destined to be with one another.

“But the thing is, I know you're different from all the rest. You and I, we are meant to be together forever. You are meant to love me forever, and I am meant to love you. That's why my abilities affect you so greatly.” Colby divulged.

“What if I say no? What if I want to leave?” I grunted, trying to shake free.

“You've had the ability to go all this time. You just don't want to. You know how much love I can give you. You know how much pleasure I can give you as well.” He bit his lip, his eyes snaking up and down my body, “You've known that since yesterday, haven't you?”

Blood rushed to my cheeks, memories of yesterday played in my head.

“And do you know what’s crazy about that? That's not even half the pleasure I can give you.” Colby kneeled next to me, a devilish smile on his lips. His hand lightly brushed my face, cupping my warm cheek sweetly.

A burst of arousal raced through me, my body spasming in ecstasy. “Oh my God!”

“I know, it's a lot to take in. But I just want to make you feel good, darling. You deserve it.” He leaned in slowly, “You are mine, after all.”

"This is what your followers meant by a deep and sensual mental connection," I groaned, feeling hands all over my body, touching me in the most lustful of ways. "You got inside their heads and mentally fucked them."

“...That's one way of wording it. But if they didn't trust me, if they didn't already want me, it wouldn't happen.” He winced playfully, “So in reality, it's your fault.”

“Fuck you.” I growled.

“But baby, that's what's happening,” Colby laughed darkly. “Those hands, those kisses and bites... that's all mine. I can tell you're losing it. You want me real bad, but you don't want to admit it. I get it, you’re overwhelmed.”

I felt like my body was getting electrocuted with pleasure. My hips grinded into the air, needing some form of relief. My nipples strained against my bra, wanting any form of touch. I closed my eyes tightly, embarrassment rolling through me as I felt my damp panties against my sex.

Fuck, he was right. I did want this, and him.

I didn't even need to say it out loud. Suddenly I felt a cock slid inside of me, too easily from how wet I had become. I ripped my eyes open, looking around. Colby was watching me from his chair, smirking.

He palmed his hardening dick through his jeans. “Imagine how much better it would be if I was actually inside of you, filling you up with every. fucking. inch.”

I thought about screaming Trey’s name. Maybe he could help me.

He grimaced, rolling his eyes. “He won’t do anything for you, sweetheart. He joined our group just a couple weeks ago. Right around the time you sent the email. So really, you have all the more reason to join us.”

“Even if I join this cult, I will never stay here. I will leave here and never come back.” I hissed.

“And that is your choice to make. But Y/N,” his gaze lowered at me, his eyes intense. “You will never be satisfied. You got barely a taste of what I can offer you, and you're gonna want it forever. Just like everyone else here.”

“You're a- fuuuuuucckk!” I moaned, the cock inside of me hitting my spot deeper. I caught my breath, glaring at him. “Y-You're a freak.”

“Says the girl almost coming to my invisible dick.” He spat, clenching his jaw.

I bit my lip, annoyed at how right he was. The hands exploring my body gripped my ass, slapping it lustfully.

“Okay, okay. I'll agree with you. I am a bit of a freak of nature. But let's not act like I'm some monster. I let people leave. But they always come back because they choose to. I can't force people that far. Pinky promise,” He stuck his pinky out, and I rolled my eyes defiantly. He huffed, “It's not like this place is Scientology, for Christ's sake. We are love. I am love.”

“You are the most tainted form of love that I've ever met.” I retorted, gripping the rug to hide my building arousal.

He deadpanned, “Ow. That hurt.”

Colby strutted over to me, laying down right beside me. The pleasure grew more intense, my hips bucking desperately. His one hand hovered over me, never touching me. It didn't matter, because having him this close felt like his whole body was on top of mine, fucking me hastily.

“If you allow yourself to enjoy this feeling, you might actually come. Because I won't force you to. I'll just keep you here, for hours, riving in pleasure until your brain melts into goo.” He smirked, “How's that sound?”

"I-I hate you." I gritted my teeth. Why did I feel like I was lying?

"No you don't. But soon you'll be able to admit the truth." He leaned his mouth in close, his voice low and sincere, "I know that this place might not be what you imagined your home to be like, but it is. You will always have a place here. You will always be loved here. And I know that's what you want deep down. To be loved unconditionally. To have every fiber of your being satisfied. And if you let me, I will do that. I will please you every night, however you want me to. But for me to do that, you have to let me in. You have to let love in."

The cock inside of me pounded faster and faster. I could barely think anymore. The only thing on my mind... was him. The lives we had together, the life we could be having. I knew I shouldn't want it, but I did. I wanted him in my life, forever. He was what was missing, and I couldn't live one more day without him.

I mewled loudly, my hips thrusting up erotically. Colby's hand cupped my face gently, turning my head to look him in the eyes.

His alluring eyes stared deep into mine, his jaw clenched. "You will always be mine. I am love, and that is all you could ask for."

"You are love, and that's all I could ask for." I repeated mindlessly, grabbing onto his arm desperately.

His face softened, “That's right baby. You're such a good girl for me. My good girl, forever. You want that, don't you?”

“Yessss, please Colby. I want to be yours forever.” I keened.

"You will be. I promise, you will always be mine." His eyes darkened, the pupils almost completely blown out. "You will never leave."

"I won't!" I trembled, my orgasm building closer and closer to the edge.

“You wanna come, Y/N? Get close for me. Don't I feel so good inside of you? You like when I do this?” Colby's hand snaked down my body, rubbing my clit sensually.

I begged wantonly, dying to come. "Pleaseeeeee! Please let me come! I need it! I need you."

"Of course you do, baby. You and I need each other. Our connection is unlike anyone else's. Tell me the truth and I'll let you come." He leaned in close, his lips brushing against my ear, "Tell me, baby. Say it..."

"I love you," I cried out, right on the edge. I direly wanted him to say it back, knowing it was already the truth.

“I love you too, baby,” he smiled sweetly, kissing my cheek. “Now, come for me.”

Hot, white pleasure shot through my body. I had the strongest orgasm of my life, my mind shattering as I rode every wave of pleasure that went through me. Colby stayed by my side, shushing me as my high lowered down more and more. He kept whispering 'I love you' repeatedly, my mind unable to hear or think anything else after a while.

I blacked out at some point but awoke when my body was lifted off the floor and placed softly into a bed. “Wha... happenin?” I slurred.

“Relax, darling. I just brought you to my bed. Well, our bed now,” he chuckled. “I want you to get your rest because tomorrow is a big day for you.”

“What's tomorrow?” I murmured.

“Your introduction to everyone as my soulmate.” Colby informed happily, tucking me in. “Everyone will be so pleased that you changed your mind about joining us.”

I nodded my head, snuggling deep into his bed. He dimmed the lights, whispering softly, "Welcome home, Y/N."

#colby brock #colby brock fanfic #colby brock fic #colby brock fanfiction #colby brock x reader #colby brock smut #colby brock one shot #colby brock oneshot #golbrocklovely's 13 nights of halloween

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melodygatesauthor · 1 year

Text

Chapter 1: The Awakening

prof!Steven Grant-Jake Lockley-Marc Spector X f!Reader

Edited by: @welcometostayingawake (she's the real MVP)

Mood Boards - Book Cover - Masterlist

Summary:

Doctor Steven Grant accepted a job as a professor at a prestigious college in New England. While you're on your way to your first history class in your second semester of your junior year, you run into an attractive English man at the coffee shop. The two of you hit it off, and since you're both headed in the same direction upon leaving, you decide to walk together. You're both excited to have met someone you have clear chemistry with right off the bat until...you realize that you both were headed to the same building, and that he's your new history professor.

When you discover that there's even more to this man than meets the eye, things get even more complicated than you could've imagined. Loving one man who's almost twice your age in a place where your relationship is forbidden is hard enough, nevermind three.

Chapter Summary:

It's your first day of class, and you meet a nice guy at the coffee shop on your way in. Too bad when you find out he's just out of reach.

Tags/Summary (these are for the ENTIRE fic):

college AU, no powers/not in MCU/no Khonshu, talk of mental illness, Marc has DID, forbidden relationship, age gap, reader is 21y/o, Boys are 38y/o, reader attends college in America but isn't necessarily American, smut, sex, masturbation, p in v, creampies galore, reader is on birth control, dubious consent due to identity issues, ANGST, romance, fluff and smut, oral sex, falling in love, reader is not race coded.

Word Count: 3.8k

It was the first day of the semester and you were already looking forward to it being over. With the holidays out of the way, you should be feeling refreshed and ready for the second half of your junior year, but when the sun beat through your dorm room and directly into your eyes, in combination with your screeching alarm, you wanted nothing more than to stay in bed. Your roommate was stirring on the other side of the room in her own bed, and you were sure she felt the same.

Coming back from winter break was never easy. You had to get used to a new schedule, and leave behind the laziness of gorging on food and festivities with your family. You picked up your phone and turned off the alarm with a groan before flopping back over on the mattress. It was only 7:15am.

Layla grumbled into her pillow. “I don’t want to go.”

“Yeah, me neither.” You agreed, throwing your blanket off in a huff.

“What class do you have first?”

“History with… Dr. Grant, I think.” You rolled your eyes.

“Oh, he’s the new professor who came over from England I think.” She sighed and got out of bed.

Her dark curls were a mess and bouncing all around her as she walked over to the small mirror in the wardrobe and picked something out of her teeth. You remembered hearing there was a new professor for this history course after the last one got kicked out for having inappropriate relations with a student, but you had forgotten the name of the replacement until now. History wasn’t really your strong suit anyway.

“My parents told me I have to ask him for tutoring.” You said, picking some clothes out of your drawer. “I flunked last year.”

“I remember.” She said with a hair elastic in her teeth while she pulled her curls back into a messy bun.

You got yourself dressed, put a little makeup on and finished getting ready. The air outside was chilly, and you pulled your coat tightly over yourself. You stopped in at Moonbean Coffee to get your usual pick-me-up before your first class. One of the perks of an open campus was the luxury of grabbing a real coffee before spending hours in a lecture.

The line in front of you was fortunately short, only one person stood between you and the barista. You noticed the man in front of you fumbling around in the pockets of his gray jacket. He let out a sound in frustration.

“Bollocks.” He said under his breath, patting himself down. “I think I left my wallet…”

He looked panicked, and you felt bad, having been in that position before. You decided it was time to do your good samaritan act of the day and you pulled your own wallet out of your bag.

“Here.” You reached around the man and handed the woman at the register a bill.

The man turned to you and his lips curled into a big smile. His tired eyes looked you up and down. You took note of his disheveled appearance. He clearly needed his drink as badly as you did.

“Oh! You don’t have to do that, I’m just-erm…I don’t have to have it.” He said, clearly anxious from your kind gesture. You took note of his thick English accent.

You shrugged and smiled at him comfortingly, “I’d die without my morning coffee. Don’t worry about it.”

“Good morning…” the barista said your name.

“Morning, T.” You said as she got started on your usual drink.

The man still stood there to the side. “That really was very kind of you. Very sweet.” He sipped the cup. “Oh bugger.” He cursed. “That’s hot.” A small chuckle escaped him.

You giggled. “Don’t mention it. I’ve been there, done that.”

His gaze lingered on you, lips still curled in a cheeky grin. He gasped when his wrist buzzed. He looked at it quickly.

“Oh, I really have to get goin’. You come here often, yeah?” He asked, looking at you eagerly.

“Y-yeah, I do.” T handed you your coffee as you handed her another bill and told her to keep the change.

Following him to the door, he opened it for you, letting you out first before exiting as well.

“Good, maybe I’ll catch you another time then, I’ll getcha back.” He nodded. “Alright then. Bye!”

“Yeah, sounds good!” You smiled foolishly at him, “bye.” You waved before realizing he was walking the same direction you were going.

He let out a laugh as you kept pace with him. “Well of course we’re walkin’ the same way. That’s not awkward at all.”

You chuckled, “Well, you can make it up to me now then, walking alone can be boring.”

When you saw the way he looked at you, your stomach fluttered. You’d seen that look before. He was interested in you. The man was clearly older than you, but you didn’t care. He was good looking, and judging by his messy curls, gentle gaze and overall demeanor, he was just your type.

“Alright sure, yeah, I can do that.” He said eagerly.

You introduced yourself. “…what’s your name?”

“Oh, name’s Steven, with a V.”

The two of you started walking in the direction of the building your class would be held in.

“So, Steven, clearly you’re not from around here, what brings you to a small college city like this?” You sipped your warm drink while the two of you walked through the chilly September air, not wanting to rush.

“Well, a job, actually.” He sipped from his cup, too, this time not flinching at the temperature.

“Oh, what do you do for work?” You asked, realizing you were approaching the brick building where your class was held all too quickly. You wished it was just a little further so you could get just another moment with Steven.

He stopped in front of the building, as if he knew you were stopping there before you told him your destination.

“I’m a history professor. This is my stop actually! Sorry, not a long walking partner.” His friendly and naive smile was about to fade when he realized the awful irony of the situation you were both in.

It hit you like a truck, “a-are you…Dr. Grant?” You asked, brows stitched together as your heart dropped into your stomach.

It made sense now: the English accent, out of place in a New England college city, the messy hair, the messenger bag and binder of notes that you just then took notice of. It should’ve been obvious from the moment you met him, everything about his appearance screamed ‘college professor’.

For some reason, this felt awkward. It was obvious just in the short time you’d known this man that you both were somewhat attracted to one another. Not that it was serious, of course, but there was an undeniable flirtatious air surrounding the whole encounter. The way he looked at you, and the way you looked at him, sharing timid smiles between promises of coffee, it was plain as day.

Now, he was shifting awkwardly in front of you as you were tapping the paper cup in your hand deep in thought. There was nothing wrong with buying your new professor a cup of coffee when he forgot his wallet, and there was nothing wrong with your new professor walking his student to class. You were both walking the same way anyway.

“Erm…yeah, yup.” You could see him trying to shake off the fog, the fantasy you both had entertained for the two minute walk.

“Well, that’s so ironic.” You tried to push past it, hoping it would help diffuse the new tension. “I’m in your class.”

He nodded despondently, his dark circled eyes looking to the ground to avoid your gaze. He hastily opened the door for you, and you thanked him as you walked in. You were stiff as a board as you made your way inside the classroom. Even though there was really nothing wrong with the interaction you’d had, something felt maddeningly nerve wracking about the whole situation.

You took a seat somewhere in the middle next to someone you remembered seeing around in other classes last semester, but never remembered her name. You hoped Dr. Grant would take you sitting in the middle table as a way of saying, “that whole interaction was totally normal, not awkward at all, see? I’m sitting in the middle instead of all the way in the back corner to avoid you.” You silently hoped the message translated.

You pulled your laptop out of your bag. You opened it and peered over the top. Dr. Grant’s eyes were stuck on you for a second while he shuffled the papers on his desk before he nervously looked away and sat down.

You tried to look at anything other than him, but you couldn’t help stealing glances at him over the top of your screen. He put his laptop on his desk and opened it. You watched him inconspicuously as he put his jacket around the back of his chair and he pulled out a pair of glasses, placing them on his face. They made him look older, but you didn’t think it made him any less attractive. In fact, you liked the way they looked. You quickly shook the thought from your head.

You need to stop this, you’re acting ridiculous, you told yourself.

“Alright, well.” He stood up, let out a deep exhale, and put the glasses back on the table. The final students were trickling in. “I’m Dr. Grant, but you can all call me Steven. Dr. Grant is a bit formal, innit?” He chuckled, but the rest of the class remained silent. “Alright.” He rubbed his hands together nervously.

You felt bad, seeing him clearly trying to connect with the uncaring class. He messed idly with his dark blue tie before patting it down and clearing his throat.

“Well, I won’t start us off with anything too flashy today. It is the first day after all.” He began.

The lecture was a couple of hours, but Dr. Grant made it feel like it was much shorter than that. He was like a completely different person than the anxious man you’d met at the cafe. He was excited, smiling and full of energy while he taught the first lesson. To see someone so passionate about something sparked excitement and admiration inside you, even if the subject itself wasn’t your strong suit.

The amount of times he said, ‘I mean, wow’, was surprising and more than a little endearing. He certainly had a way of making a topic that you weren’t very adept in much more interesting just from his own enthusiasm. As he was wrapping up the lecture, you checked the clock. 10:20am. Your next class wasn’t until 1:00pm, leaving you plenty of time to talk to him about tutoring. Only tutoring, you reminded yourself.

You felt anxious though, standing there after the last student left. You clutched your satchel to your side like your life depended on it. He didn’t notice you at first, because you’d started to walk away with the crowd, trying to decide if you were even going to ask him to tutor you or not, but then you remembered your father’s words. I’m not paying for you to waste your time in school, you already picked a meaningless major, the least you can do is get decent grades.

You stepped up to his desk and cleared your throat. He peered up over his reading glasses and jumped when he saw you.

“Oh, erm, hi, class is dismissed.” He said anxiously, so different from the person speaking with utmost confidence to fifty or more students just a few minutes ago.

“Yeah, I know,” you started, “I know, I just needed to talk to you about something.”

He started getting nervous, you could see sweat beading on his forehead above his strong eyebrows. If someone asked you why you were so anxious about asking your new history professor to tutor you, you’d tell them you had no idea, but deep down you knew it was because the two of you definitely had a weird connection at the coffee shop.

“Oh, is this about…it’s about the coffee, yeah? I really-”

“N-no, Dr. Grant-“

“Steven.” He corrected you.

“S-Steven.” You cleared your throat once again. “No, I’m, uh, I’m not worried about the coffee. I need to ask for tutoring.”

He pressed a hand to his chest in relief, “Oh, heh, right, yeah, ‘course.” A large smile on his face.

He felt the connection, too, you thought, and he’s relieved you didn’t bring it up.

“Well, there’s plenty of other students around who do that, yeah? Maybe go to the library, I think that’s where you sign up for something like that.” You didn’t know what it was about this man that captivated you, but when his eyes locked on to yours you felt your stomach twist in yearning.

“Um…yeah.” You were wearing a faint smile while accepting his rejection. “Yeah, I guess I can try that. They didn’t have anyone last semester, but maybe they will this time. Thanks.”

It was probably for the best that he didn’t tutor you, judging by his reaction, and that’s not even considering if the connection was real and you hadn’t just made it up. You gave him a friendly nod and turned on your heel toward the exit. Just as you were grabbing the door handle, Steven spoke up.

“Wait, hold on.” He said, standing up. You turned to him. “They probably aren’t very good anyway, the students they have tutoring. Why don’t you come by after your last class on Wednesday? Not sure why time you get finished, but I can make something work.”

“M-my last class on Wednesday gets over at like seven.” You explained.

He shrugged, “M’sure my goldfish will be alright if I get home a bit later than usual.”

“Wow, okay, brilliant, yes Dr. G-uh-Steven!” You couldn’t contain your toothy grin as you thanked him profusely and left.

You felt like you were in a trance for the rest of the day. You’d thought that by not having Steven in your direct line of sight you’d be able to move on from the feeling in your gut, but it only festered. He was occupying your mind. The way he laughed, the way he talked, the way he looked at you, it was maddening.

You kept thinking about his messy hair, wondering what it would feel like to run your fingers through it. When he got nervous just from looking at you, straightening his tie, you wondered what it would look like to have him loosening it, maybe unbuttoning the top two buttons of his shirt. His eyes are what really captivated you, he looked exhausted, but they still shined so brightly when he looked at you, before he’d realized that you were his student.

When you got back to your dorm and turned in for the night, you took it upon yourself to look up your college’s specific rules around student and teacher relationships. Even though the last history professor got fired, you were trying to convince yourself now that there had to be a different reason. There just had to be.

There wasn’t a different reason though. The rules were plain as day: student and professor relationships were a no go. No one seemed to care what happened when you graduated, but until then, it was strictly forbidden. There was even talk in some resources you found about the student being expelled since they are, after all, a consenting adult who knew the consequences of their actions.

With that, it was time to lay your growing need to put yourself in Steven’s presence as much as possible to rest. At least, you wanted to. You couldn’t though, while you lay there in the dark, with Layla snoring on the other side of the room. You couldn’t stop thinking about the way he looked you up and down, his hooded eyes drinking you in, the way he exuded confidence to the class, and then became shy around you immediately after.

Your hand trailed down under your pajama bottoms to your already soaking folds, slick with your desire to know what else Steven was proficient in. You thought about his hands around the coffee cup earlier, how big they looked, veins rippling under the skin when he brought the cup to his lips. You wondered what they felt like, what one of his thick fingers would feel like inside of you. Slipping one of your own fingers inside wasn’t enough, you wanted more, you wanted to feel him.

You wished that you could fit a second finger inside, but it was too tight. You felt hot with need as you pumped in and out of your slick hole, imagining Steven hovering over you. He would tell you how wrong it was to be doing what you were doing as he trailed his hands up your ribcage and to your breasts. Would he moan loudly when he came, or would he be quiet but breathy, pressing his face into the nape of your neck to muffle his sound?

You didn’t know much about sex, not outside of porn that is. You’d done other things before. You’d tried going down on someone, but had a hard time figuring out how to do it right, at least according to the guy you were with. He had tried eating you out, but you found it was either very overrated, or he was really bad at it.

Thinking about those things made you wonder what Dr. Grant’s cock tasted like, or what it felt like. If you couldn’t even fit two fingers, you weren’t sure how you were going to manage to take him. Just thinking about it was making your arousal become unbearable. You needed him, badly, no matter how wrong you knew it was.

You could hardly take it, feeling your orgasm approaching as you fingered yourself to thoughts of your history professor. You decided you didn’t really care what he sounded like when he came, you just ached to hear him. It almost hurt how hard you bit your lip when your cunt clamped in waves over your lone digit. Your breathing was heavy, and when you felt clarity once more, you fell back onto your pillow. You had to let it go, you had to get over him somehow.

But Steven had to get over you, too.

When he got home that night after a long day of classes, he found himself standing in front of his mirror. It had been so long since he’d heard their voices. At least a couple of months. They said they wouldn’t come back, they said they would stay in the headspace, and that they wouldn’t say a word. They hadn’t said anything specific yet, but he could hear them becoming more active since that morning.

That wasn’t the only thing bothering him, the thought of you danced in his mind. You were there, causing his heart to race; causing him to feel a pang of guilt that was vastly outweighed by the arousal building behind his zipper. He had been fighting the pressure all day, fighting the heady thoughts. Steven liked to think he was mentally stronger than the primal desires that came with sex, but just seeing you in that coffee shop that morning, and the way you looked at him, it kept playing in his head over and over again like a movie.

It got to a point that he couldn’t bear the ache any longer. He took off his pants and boxer-briefs, freeing his weeping erection. He crawled into bed, not even bothering to remove his jacket or shirt, as he was too eager. Nothing had inspired him to relieve himself like this in a long, long time. He crawled into bed and laid down on his back, taking his cock into his closed fist.

Dry…s’dry, need some…

He leaned up, spitting a glob of saliva into his palm before going back to work on himself. He gripped his length, sliding over it with his fist much easier now, tossing his head back as he reached the tip. He ran his hand through his curls to get them out of his face, looking down at his cock while he thrust upward into his fingers.

“F-fu…” He said, trembling slightly.

He kept thinking about you, your hair, your sweet lips, the way you giggled when he burned himself on his hot coffee that morning. He whined, reaching down to grab the sheet at his side. He exhaled sharply, continuing to glide into his palm smoothly, increasing speed as he got even closer. The way your face lit up when he agreed to tutor you was etched into his memory.

So young, though…he thought, too young…

It didn’t stop him from bringing his hand back to his mouth, adding more saliva to continue jerking his length. He was putting his hips into it now, imagining what it would be like to have you, just for a second he let himself go there in his mind. He thought about having you on top of him, legs on either side of his hips. You, lowering yourself over his cock, taking him all the way to the hilt. Another whine escaped him. You were so pretty, he imagined looking up at you, maybe you’d bite your lip and throw your head back with a moan. Maybe you’d grab your breast, pinching the nipple, maybe you’d tell him how good he felt inside of you. That’s all it took. He filled the apartment with his moans as he coated his fingers and abdomen in hot sticky cum.

Steven’s brain was empty, other than thoughts of you that still plagued him. He’d hoped that by doing this, it would help him let it go, but now he wished you were there for different reasons. You were so bubbly and full of energy. He wanted to talk to you, he wanted to learn more about you, get to know what else makes you laugh.

With a heavy sigh, Steven slid off the bed, careful to keep his cum coated fingers from touching anything. He turned on the light in the bathroom and started rinsing his hands in the sink, finishing and grabbing a towel. When he started drying his hands, his eyes looked up into the mirror again.

His heart stopped. He waved at himself, checking to make sure his reflection kept up. They said they weren’t coming back…

Next Chapter

AO3 LINK

TAGLIST (please let me know if you would like to be added or removed): @my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction, @my-secret-shame, @thatmomwitchfriend, @alexxavicry, @welcometostayingawake, @jake-g-lockley, @campingwiththecharmings, @steven-grants-world, @lia275, @minigirl87, @ahookedheroespureheart, @ninebluehearts, @outmodead, @sleepyamaya, @pimosworld, @ababynova, @flordelalunas, @360iris, @momo-mochiball, @missdragon-1

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bucknastysbabe · 5 months

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Champagne and the Profane - Victor!B. Barnes

Rating: Explicit

Tags: TW!!! Bad mental space described, reader is an active alcoholic, implied prostitution and sexual abuse!!! Hunger games alternate universe, Pnv!sex, v!fingering, rough sex, confessions of love, two depressed ass hunger games victors, John Walker is still an asshole, Bucky is Tired and in a Situation

A/N: Reposted and edited a little from my ao3 :)

You swirled the champagne around in your hand, tuning out the nasally drone of the Capitolites. It was the season of the games and you were District 10’s female mentor. So you had to ride the train up to the Capitol, play nice, try not to think of your tributes inevitable death. They were extra pitiful this year. Sometimes District 10 would have a real rough-and-tumble ranch hand that makes it out. Most don’t see it through the cornucopia.

John Walker’s ass was an example of a real rough, gritty winner. He had it lucky, came from money, biggest ranch in the district. Like your mentor before— both men made through the games with an eerie rage. John was all easy smiles and perfected class now. Behind closed doors he was a nightmare.

He was across the room, gesturing to a group of bright colored ladies clad in feathers. Disgusting. A man with silver hair interrupted your thoughts. “What was it like throwing that knife into that District 2 boys throat? He was the last— I’d imagine you were elated.” Holding back a gag you swigged your champagne. Barely enough to put on a fake smile. He watched intently as you cheerily responded, “I was just glad to win. I didn’t really think about it, not any of them actually.” Your stomach roiled at the obvious lie. The man and others cooed, one whispering dramatically, “How cold of you! But the way you mesmerized us all with knives!” The group laughed and you politely excused yourself to the balcony.

Few people frequented the balcony, a couple here and there. You took a deep breath to calm your nerves. You were haunted by the dead tributes in your dreams every night. They stared and stared with knives stuck oddly in them— faces, necks, chest. You’d wake up screaming and down what was left of the bottle next to your bed. You’d wake up just as tired but at least there was the comfort of the void for a couple of hours.

Snagging a flute or two off the waiter next to you— those were downed in two gulps each. You discarded them on a nearby table and sighed, leaning onto the railing. Tired eyes stared out at the glimmering city as hate bubbled in your chest. You heard a shuffling and glanced over at a familiar figure loosening his bow-tie. You rasped, “Tired of the circus Barnes?” He hummed lowly in agreement and collapsed on the chair nearest to you.

Bucky Barnes won two years before you. He was a charming boy then, easy smiles and a flirty personality. He was a career tribute, a finely honed killing machine when released into the games. Like you, he was good with knives. After the games he had never been the same. Trauma rendered Buck passive and quiet. Anyone would be if immediately after a tragic victory you were whisked off to live among the Capitolites that designated you as a pretty toy. Or weapon. He wouldn’t elaborate very much on the subject during your brief meetings.

His empty blue eyes made you sad. The emptiness matched up with the same hole in your chest. You weren’t good looking or charming enough to garner the Capitol’s demand, which was a small blessing in your miserable existence. Bucky huffed, “How’re you?” You sighed, “Not drunk enough.”

“Never are, are you?” You nodded, frowning at his observation.

He merely peered up, brow slightly furrowed, reaching a hand out to grasp your own. Always the flesh hand first, thick calloused fingers intertwining with your scarred hands.

“My tributes are going to get slaughtered this year. Yours look tight per usual, another District 2 win in the books I’d say.”

He chuckled flatly, “Yep. Nothing new there. One’s attractive enough that maybe they’ll replace me.” Bucky’s arm whirred as he flexed his palm. He lost his arm in the last few minutes of the games. Of course the game-makers weren’t going to let him die so they gave Barnes the silver arm adorned with a bright red star. You bitterly added, “Maybe then you can run off to District 10 and help me butcher the cows. Put those knife skills to a better use.”

Bucky’s chest pressed to your back suddenly, a hand on your waist. You jumped in surprise, painted pout opening in a gasp. Moves like a damn cat. He murmured, “I wish. I really do.” The fellow victor nuzzled into your hair, breathing in deeply. A whimper slid out as his hand massaged your rail-like waist. You whined out, “Need you— fuck, meet me in the bathroom in ten. Last stall.”

He let you go with a nip to your shoulder. You hurriedly darted through the crowd, shooting some colorful liquor from a glass along the way. John tried to get your attention but you were already at the bathroom door. Slinking in to the last door, the only sound was the click of your heels across the marble. Once inside, you shucked off your shoes and dress. You sat down on the bench and tried to present yourself sexily. He doesn’t even give a shit, it’s just the yearly fuck.

He merely didn’t mind a sickly looking drunk who might’ve been prettier if she put down the bottle. Or Bucky needed someone real, that was the second guess on why he desired you so.

Bucky entered later than expected but was already removing his clothes as soon as the door was locked. He hissed, “Fucking vultures, I had to stop three times.” Pausing to eye you reverently, Bucky growled lowly when he eyed your tits. He rumbled, “Fuck you look good. Natural. A goddamn natural.” Barnes shucked down his pants and underwear, his hard cock bobbing proudly. You stood up and closed into his space, leaning up for a kiss. The brunette grabbed your ass and hoisted you upwards.

You let out a squeak cut off by a moan when he closed his lips over yours. He started a rough pace, forcing an opening up to plunder your mouth. Your back slammed against the cold wall and you gasped into his mouth. Bucky sucked on your tongue with a low groan, big hands massaging your ass harshly. He moved down to thin neck, unceremoniously biting and sucking like an animal. Your head hit the wall with a shuddery moan. The metallic hand gripped your breast, the soft flesh spilling between his fingers.

“Buck— god! Fuck me please! Fuck me fuck me fuck me!” you cried out desperately.

He rasped into your bruised neck, “Yeah? Want me to ruin your perfect pussy? Fuck that noise outta’ your pretty head? Huh slut?”

“Please, baby please,” you moaned with jerky nods.

He tweaked your nipple roughly before moving down south to soaked cunt. He slid two body heated fingers across your slit, twirling around your engorged clit. You clawed at his broad shoulders and bucked wildly with whines of his name. He pumped his fingers in roughly and stretched you out for a couple of minutes, rambling dark nonsense. The fingers were replaced with the blunt tip of his cock, pushing in slowly. Your insides burned sweetly with the stretch.

Fuck. Pain was so nice. What you deserved.

You panted against his veined neck as Bucky pushed into you, fully seating his dick inside. He peppered a couple of kisses to the tops of your breasts and began a harsh rhythm. His metal hand joined the flesh one in gripping your ass. Smacks of his hips against yours echoed in the bathroom. Not like these debaucherous people cared anyways, encouraged it actually. You dug into the thick muscle of his shoulders, drawing blood. He grunted with the force of his thrusts, long hair stuck to his face with sweat. You stared into his blue eyes and whimpered, “So good Buck, so fucking good. Don’t stop.”

“Not gonna- ah- stop sweets,” the man panted. The ever roaming hand settled on your throat, gently squeezing the sides. Your eyes rolled back at the rush of blood to your head combined with Bucky’s cock maddeningly brushing your sweet spot. He groaned, “Gorgeous baby, gonna come on my cock like a good girl?” You were too gone to speak, only a pathetic noise slipping out. Bucky grinned, “Gone dumb, that’s good. C’mon now.”

You whole body was quaking with pleasure, legs squeezing around his toned waist. You sobbed and writhed as he battered your sensitive core, just enough to blur the lines between pleasure and pain. Another well timed thrust and husky murmurs in your ear shot you over the threshold. Your vision whited out, spasming around Bucky’s length, warmth gushing from between your legs. Bucky let out a long drawn moan at the feeling of your pussy pulsing around him. He whined, “Awh fffuck— love you!” The brunette released in hot bursts; grinding his hips up to ride out the pleasure, huffing like a racehorse.

You pushed his long hair from his face, chest heaving in pants. Bucky maneuvered you two onto the bench and slid out with a soft noise. His cum slowly dripped from your core. You whispered, “Did you mean that?” Bucky’s eyes widened and he asked, “What?” You looked away in fear, sudden trepidation.

It was just an in the moment thing. Maybe.

“That you love me?”

Bucky swallowed thickly, big hands petting your scarred skin, eyes darting around.

“Uh. Yes,” he shyly admitted.

A flit of manic glee struck you. Out came a laugh, “Love you too. Star-crossed lovers added to the list of misery now.” Tears began to fall soon after, Buck kissing them away, pink lips pouting. He sighed, “M’sorry, M’sorry, I know.”

“No, no, can’t help the way we feel sweets.”

Sharing some sweet nothings and a couple of more kisses, you shakily got dressed. You were worried about falling with how weak your legs felt. With an intimate goodbye, you smoothed back your hair and rejoined the party. You met back up with John who snarked, “I see you got your yearly fuck in with Barnes.” You smiled and grabbed his drink playfully, people were staring with intense curiosity. Always nosy, these folk. You gulped the drink back to settle the growing pang of loneliness in your chest. You caught his blue eyes across the room, Bucky was back in actor mode. He flirted with a group of scantily clad people, doing that beloved half smirk, showing off his arm.

When the party was over and you sat dazedly in your bed, you dreamt up an alternate reality where Bucky could join you at home. Tending to the cows and working together. Tears slid down your face as you tipped up the almost empty bottle. Buck was right, never enough.

#bucky barnes fanfic #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes smut #bucky barnes angst #hunger games au #victor bucky Barnes x Victor reader #dom bucky barnes

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pyeonghongrie · 2 months

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champagne problems

Summary: Sometimes you just don’t know the answer, until someone’s on their knees and asks you.

Characters/Pairing(s): San X Reader

Genre: Angst.

AUs/Trope info: Established relationship, marriage rejection, song fic

Word Count: 586

Warnings: Swearing, mental health mention, alcoholism mentions, sloppy POV changes

Rating: 16+

A/N: repost from my old blog @cryrieariver, I'm reuploading my own work, I did not plagiarize. This is also reformatted and edited for ease of reading.

You booked the night train for a reason So you could sit there in this hurt Bustling crowds or silent sleepers You're not sure which is worse

San was slumped over on the train seat, elbows on his spread thighs and nails scratching at the velvet flocked box sitting on his fingers. He looked pathetic, sitting alone and dejected in an empty train car, trying to hold his tears back. He hung his head low, biting his lip until it bled. Who knew this would happen?

He didn’t like the bustle of the city, everyone only cared about the place they wanted to go to, not bothering to check the man that was clearly hurting.

Because I dropped your hand while dancin' Left you out there standing Crestfallen on the landing Champagne problems

Your mom's ring in your pocket My picture in your wallet Your heart was glass I dropped it Champagne problems

He replayed the moment in his mind, the way your grip on his hand faltered, the way you looked at him with glassy eyes when you told him you didn’t want to dance anymore. He should’ve known, should’ve taken it as a sign.

You told your family for a reason You couldn't keep it in Your sister splashed out on the bottle Now no one's celebrating

Dom Pérignon you brought it No crowd of friends applauded Your hometown skeptics called it Champagne problems.

He remembers telling his family about his plan to propose to you, he was so sure that you’ll be his future, his new chapter in life. His sister was just as excited as him, taking up all her savings just to get a bottle for the soon-to-be celebration.

When you rejected him, all his hometown skeptics told him it was never a good idea to marry a city girl. He thinks maybe he should’ve listened.

You had a speech, you're speechless Love slipped beyond your reaches And I couldn't give a reason Champagne problems

He remembers closing the box in silence, no cheers, no music, no words. He walked out of the restaurant with a blank face and a broken heart.

Your Midas touch on the Chevy door November flush, and your flannel cure "This dorm was once a madhouse" I made a joke, "Well, it's made for me"

How evergreen, our group of friends? Don't think we'll say that word again And soon they'll have the nerve to deck the halls That we once walked through

You knew you could trust him, he was the love of your life, he did everything for you, supported you through your episodes, and made you feel happy and loved. He was your shoulder to cry on and the sun to warm you. Nothing could replace him, but you let him go because you didn’t deserve him, he didn’t deserve someone like you- he deserved someone better.

One for the money Two for the show I never was ready So I watch you go

Sometimes you just don't know the answer 'Til someone's on their knees and asks you "She would've made such a lovely bride What a shame she's fucked in the head"

They said, but you'll find the real thing instead She'll patch up your tapestry that I shred And hold your hand while dancing Never leave you standing crestfallen on the landing

With champagne problems Your mom's ring in your pocket Her picture in your wallet You won't remember all my champagne problems

You won't remember all my champagne problems.

Tags: @kwanisms, @yoonguurt, @shinestarhwaa, @stardragongalaxy, @wooyoungmybelovedhusband, @anyamaris, @dimpledsatan, @haosweater, @starlitmark, @seongwin, @midnxght-sky, @nebulousbookshelf, @piratequeen-queenofgames, @northerngalxy, @yourfatherlucifer, @twisted-tales-of-all, @seumiley, @pocketsky

Network Tags: @cultofdionysusnet, @wonderlandnet, @kflixnet

Strikethrough: cannot tag

#cultofdionysusnet #wonderlandnet #kvanity #k-labels #kflixnet #kwritersworldnet #hiraya-m #pyeonghongrie #ateez angst #ateez #ateez fanfic #ateez san #choi san #ateez x reader #san x reader angst #san x reader #ateez imagines #ateez scenarios

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localcoffeeshop · 8 months

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okayy seeing finn mental health takes in the tag and reminded of something i wrote in a rush before work today which i will now edit...

I think my opinion on finn is that hes not doing exceptionally horribly or exceptionally well. obviously he has issues and is literally refusing to think about sad things and grief... and he keeps roping jake’s descendants in to be his partner on adventures because hes trying to relive that… but i also think like its not all like. “omg things are so bad, he's in such a bad spot right now oh my god" because finn has like. always been like this. using adventuring/fighting as a coping mechanism which isn’t really inherently wrong? there have been times where adventure has been genuinely helpful for him to get through something and reach self-actualization. not just hall of egress, but the dungeon train was a way of distracting himself from the break-up with FP, and while he had to learn to put a limit on it and chill instead of obsessing forever, he also decided to stay on for "a week or two" because it was helpful for him to process what he was going through by getting enthralled in adventure and knowing he could return to mundanity after. and then on the opposite side of things, there are times where actually getting carried away with his feelings and "working stuff out" has put him in danger and not led to the result he anticipated, like the tower. i don't think that where he's at in fionna and cake is a regression as much as a constant.

i think he has some good things going, but he also has some really sad things going where he’s trying really hard not to think about the sad stuff. so its like. i just think there's a balance, just like real life, like people who "keep living their lives" as BMO said in the finale. his life isn’t horrible and terrible and sad, and it isn’t wonderful love light and healing and growth either. like, he’s just Finn. exactly as Finn is. even though he wasn't magically cured of all his troubles, traumas, and problems in his coming-of-age story - in fact a lot of things definitely slid backwards as a result of losing jake - there were still valuable lessons he learned and carried with him that influence the person he is in fionna & cake. we know he stays a bit of an adventurer into his older years, but i also really believe that it's not just all running from the pain - there's always a feeling of grief and sadness in him, but that doesn't keep him from experiencing genuine joy and happiness, having good times and bad times, enjoying his life and struggling with it... being finn

#adventure time #fionna and cake #fionna and cake spoilers #actually been thinking so much about finn because i resent the idea that it's all so entirely sad... i think its more than that!#and i could talk so much about finn and about his piss poor attempts to Be Jake to simon in this OOOOOOUGGHH

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r0w0fie · 11 months

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Update on the CK situation:

I'm shocked I'm saying this but, instead of Carnivorekitty giving it some time to settle down & to use that time to grow . . He just deleted/deactivated his art accounts???

His Tumblr has been deactivated & his Ck twitter account has been seemingly deleted. The Lurking for Love twitter account is still up.

Edit 2: his art twitter is still up but the tag have been changed & the account privated. Any use of the direct link to the old tag doesn't work, hence why I thought it was possibly deleted.

He has changed his now deactivated Tumblr name to "don't make your fanbase on here" which says alot . . .

His Carrd has also been cleared out, including the Toyhouse account. Although his Ko-fi & Itchio are still up. You can see a preview to the old links in the second screenshot below.

Edit 1: his carrd has also been deleted now

He has renamed his previous Carnivorekitty twitter account to yeehawcrow and has privated it.

The background image was changed after the situation. This is just another jab at his fanbase, same as all his other account name changes.

His Niwi account, the one with the transphøbia & -ism interactions, is still up but has been privated.

The name change is still up which shows that he still stands by his views. Do with that info as you will, just no harassment towards said account please & thanks.

I hope this is the last time I have to say anything or update people on the issue.

Some personal thoughts & feelings under the cut ⬇️

I am now further disappointed with Tom. I do not know if he said anything before deactivating, like a farewell or a "will be back eventually".

If he had of simply given it some time, let the dust settle, realign his mental state and then try to figure out why this was so hurtful to his fanbase. He could of had a chance to return & continue on; if he wanted too.

Of course, not everyone would be happy to see him return. Not everyone would even interact with his accounts or be willing to be in the fandom again. But it was still an option, especially if he uses this as a learning opportunity, not just for past fans or present fans, but for himself.

I personally won't be supporting Tom unless some serious growth & acknowledgment is shown. Unfortunately, I don't think thats going to happen any time soon due to the examples & links above. It might never happen or it might take months/years.

I hope Tom is safe & I hope everyone else is safe aswell. Make sure to look after yourselves & reach out to those you trust if you're not doing too hot xx

For now I will change my hyperfocus from Jacob & co onto other games & characters. It hurts to do so but there are so many good peeps out there & we shouldn't be afraid to trust them. I hug anyone who now is because of this situation 🫂

I will forever be into Milo (@/solarchaotica's oc) & will be getting back into LoveLock so I can bully my fave character Walter even tho Seb is the fan fave lol

My personal feelings on all of this? It's shitty.

People defending all of the horrible evidence, without saying they don't agree with aspects of these "questionable" simply because they want to defend CK; is shitty.

People putting things in other people's mouths, is shitty.

People burying their heads in the sand because they want to ignore it all; is shitty.

People giving excuses, even excuses as to why they are ignoring this issue or ignoring certain parts of this issue, is shitty.

People who genuinely support these types of beliefs, only joined in because they're genuinely phobic & aren't even in the L4L/murdersim community; is shitty. (& Yes I've seen it happen)

People who harrass anyone involved, Tom himself, is shitty.

People who use this as evidence to defend other past users actions, is shitty.

People who lash out their hurt through nasty words & ill wishes upon others, is shitty.

People who say anything about Tom or others ky$-ing themselves, are super mega shitty like wtf??? Don't do that???? I only saw one person but still????

It's all just super mega shitty and I hate it so much and it hurts so much to see other people be so so hurt and just aaahshsgskxbdjfb. I cried the first day, not because of my personal feelings, but because of others talking openly about how hurt this made them. Seeing my friends be hurt. Strangers be hurt. Mutuals be hurt. I could still cry if I let myself dwell on it for too long.

I wish things could of ended up better. When I posted on the situation I tried to tell peeps to keep an open mind & to look after themselves. I just hope this is a learning experience for alot of people.

#murdersim #jacob alden #carnivorekitty #lurking for love #jacob lfl #l4l #niwinoodle #tw: discrimination #tw// lgbt+phobia #tw// transphobia

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cookiesupplier · 2 months

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Every Rose Has Its Thorns - Part Twenty-Seven

pairing: Ricky Olson x ofc x Chris 'Motionless' Cerulli

warnings/tropes: slow burn, soulmates, strangers to enemies to lovers, betrayal, angst, fluff, smut, language, panic attack, stalking, online bullying, serious mental health issues.

summary: In a world where soulmates inexplicably receive a tattoo that will match that of their soulmate the moment they turn eighteen years old, being famous and covered in very visible tattoos can make finding your true soulmate a questionable fate. For everyone involved.

❗❗ author’s note: This chapter includes serious mental health situations in the past of a character, involving in this case voluntary treatment in a mental facility. Treatment for Depression, Anxiety, and Grief Counselling. Please beware of these potential triggers. I am in no way a medical professional writing this.❗❗

an2: finished editing last night, so you are getting this baby EARLY, going to try and be back to my usual schedule! Now.. concerning this part.. *hides*

tags: @tearfallpixie @cncohshit @jordynyingling0219 @faceless-mirror @nyxthedestroyerofworlds @wild-child-7747 @witchyweeb34 @black-damask1999 @jilliemiw86 @ilovesamkiszka @lyschko666 @lacktoesandtoddlerants @bngurngheart @collapsedglasshouses @laurpartyprogram @sunsshinesunny @malerieee

Tag List is Open, please let me know if you would like to be added to it or in general.

Talia took in a surprised breath when Chris said he’d been committed. She would never in her life say that she thought he was the type, because who in their mind was the type, was she the type? No. No one was a person she could look at and think, oh, that would be someone she for sure thought should end up in an institution at some point in their life. She would absolutely hate herself if she did. Even the people who talked to themselves didn’t deserve to be thought of that way, they were people who were in desperate need of help, not people who needed to be judged like that, it was cruel. Still, at that moment, knowing what she did already, she was lost.

She glanced from Chris to Ricky, unsure of what to think, and saw the concerned expression passed between them, Rick reached for Chris’ hand, and she swallowed slightly, her soulmate tattoo tingling, but it wasn’t upsetting, it was… she wasn’t sure how she’d describe the feeling. When did she start categorising them? Pleased.. Whatever was driving these feelings, it was pleased.. Seeing him comfort his friend, seeing this side of him, was that it, was it pleased, this, the bond between them. She watched, staying quiet as they spoke softly, whispering, not wanting to interfere, but hearing whispered words, knowing they weren’t for her though.

“Are you sure..”

“She’s bound to find out-”

“But-”

“Rick, I know you’re worried, I get it, but I trust her.”

As Chris’ whispered explanation of why he should tell her to Ricky continued, Talia chose to purposely pushed them from her mind. She didn’t want to be unworthy of that trust, unworthy of her friendship with Chris, because with how close they had gotten, he meant the world to her. He had become more important to her than he could possibly know, and it, and the thought that he was willing to trust her with something so personal like this.. Looking down at her hands, trying not to think about the fact that she’d just trusted them with something that she’d not spoken of out-loud about since she’d left the facility, to anyone. Not even Ava.

She should tell her the truth, she should tell all her friends and hope that they won't hate her for hiding it from them for so long. Taking in a deep breath, holding it for a moment to ground herself, before letting it out slowly, just grounding herself for a moment while the boys sorted themselves out. Chris’ voice, clear and no longer whispering, brought her back.

“You okay, JellyBean?”

Chris looked across the table, whispering with Risky, semi-arguing with him about the validity of telling her the whole story about everything that had happened. Rick didn’t understand why he had to tell her, when part of the reason his life was as peaceful as it was from stalkers and shit these days, was that no one outside the immediate band and crew that we trusted implicitly, knew. The thing was, he wasn’t sure he could explain it to Ricky, but even though he’d only known her for a short time, he did trust her, especially after hearing what they’d just heard.

This was a woman who has had her soul bond ripped open by not only her own flesh and blood family, whom she could no longer trust, but strangers that her family put their trust in more than her, and she still came out fighting to keep going. He’d seen her over this past week, sitting in that café, laughing, and smiling, and was the most wonderfully sweet person, even after what she’d been through. Yes, he trusted her, because, above all she was right here, sitting with her soulmate, she didn’t give in, she didn’t give up. Well, some might say she did, but she didn’t do that because of the doctors, she did that because of a fucked up stalker that tipped the scales just a little bit too far, and frankly, Chris got it now. The day Talia had seen Ricky with Grace, had seen them together, and seen what she thought him to be, happy, he more than understood why she took that giant step back and didn’t fight against it. When someone you were destined to love was happy, all you wanted, was that happiness for them.

When Talia’s eyes opened and met his and a soft smile curving across that beautiful face, Chris returned it,

“There she is, are you okay? We don’t have to talk about this if it’s going to be too much?”

And yet it was Chris’ hand that Ricky was squeezing slightly, his fingers tight, he knew how he got about the whole thing, if he only knew lately.. If he only knew.

“I’m okay, Chris, are you?”

He nodded slightly in response to her worry, just keeping his gentle smile.

“Yes, but I should really start from the beginning, it’s a bit of a story, some of which you probably know, but not everything. Are you okay with that?”

Hearing everything, Chris didn’t want to put this all on her, it had been an intense day, and he didn’t want her to feel like she had to take the weight of his story on top of it at the same time. However, before he had much time to worry about whether she was going to have a hard time with the situation, she was shifting her chair along the table so she could reach for his other hand, a comfort from both of them, his fingers curving around her delicate ones.

“As long as you’re comfortable, Chris, I’m not going anywhere.”

His smile growing at the thought, squeezing both of their hands gently,

“Well, you probably know I was in a long-term relationship, we were engaged, wedding planning, had a date set.. Venue booked.. Her dress was picked out and being altered, it was..”

He sighed remembering, looking down at the table, just finding a spot on the wood, barely paying attention to the fact that neither of them had let go of his hands, but at the same time, his fingers were clinging to theirs a bit tightly. Chris needed the touch not to get lost in the memories, for in more ways than one, which he knew she’d understand.

“It’s common knowledge in the fan base that she wasn’t my soulmate, but neither of us cared, we loved each other, and wanted to be together.. At least that's what I thought, how we felt at the time.”

Chris shook his head slightly, this wasn’t even the hardest part to talk about, but it all lead to why he’d been committed, because if he just said the little bit at the end, it didn’t tell close to the full picture.

“A few weeks before we were meant to be married, a woman claiming to be my soulmate turned up, her tattoo was perfect, a fake, but perfect, so she thought. I knew she wasn’t my soulmate, I proved it easily, I’d laid out false trails for my soulmate tattoo years ago. Where it was, what it was, how big it was, she was not my soulmate.”

He felt Ricky’s hand squeeze his firmly, he knew, Ricky had been through all of this with him, he’d had to deal with the whole debacle as well, and now again with Grace on a whole different level. Chris felt for Rick, because hiding his tattoo was so much worse for him than Chris, at least his could go under his shirt most days, there was a reason that there wasn’t very many shirtless photographs out there of him in the world. Those that there are, he’d covered in paint and makeup usually, so it worked for him.

“My fiancé, however, didn’t take it well, she tried to continue like it didn’t matter, but during the lead up to the wedding my fiancé became, distant. Worried about what she was thinking I tried to reassure her, I tried to help everything go as smoothly as humanly possible, but, nothing helped, nothing worked.. I loved her, and she.. A few days before the wedding she broke it off. She couldn’t handle the possibility my soulmate could turn up, and so publicly try to claim me.”

“The way she fucking said that, as if you were something for your soulmate to own.. Cunt.”

“Ricky!” Chris looked over at him, scolding him, despite the fact this was no the first time he’d heard him speak of her in such a hostile way.

“What? She was! I’m sorry Chris, but what she did was fucking shit, I get it, she was having second thoughts, but she blamed you, and how you were famous, how and your soulmate could turn up at any time. Well funnily enough, her soulmate could have turned up at any fucking time too, but she didn’t think about that, now, did she?”

Chris took in a breath, yea, that was something he’d thought about as well, and Ricky was spot on, but he didn’t want to argue about it, not in front of- oh- he looked over towards Talia as he felt her squeeze his hand again.. Seeing her nod with a small smile, she got it.

“It’s okay, Chris, he’s right.. You both had other soulmates, her putting it on yours turning up, wasn’t fair. Especially if she loved you.”

“Exactly.”

His breath was shaky as Rick agreed with Talia,

“the Story isn’t over, and Ricky knows it, so…”

A half-hearted glare at Ricky which pointedly said a silent shut up, which earned a bit of a giggle from Talia, Chris smiled as he continued.

“After the wedding was cancelled, I hit a patch of depression, which wasn’t helped when the stalker saw an opening, and started attacking my life since her main obstacle was suddenly gone. She came at me in so many different ways, you don’t want to know, it will keep you up at night, it was, frankly, terrifying thinking about all the different things that did and could have happened, I ended up in the hospital A&E more than once because of her, and it wasn’t pretty.”

Taking in a deep breath, he didn’t want to go into detail, because it was hard enough to talk about as he was, and Ricky being here with him, and knowing he wasn’t going to be home on his own after all of this, was a fucking comfort if he was being honest.

“Eventually they caught her, we were able to keep most of it out of the press, because the stress, the pain, had me cracking.. But, but um.. About a little over two months after I was supposed to get married.. My soulmate tattoo..”

Chris’ voice cracked, and he felt both hands almost simultaneously grip his so tightly, even if only one of them knew for certain wasn’t coming, the other could fucking guess, there was one thing everyone in the world knew happened to the tattoos without a doubt.

“It turned white.”

The moment it did, he knew his soulmate had died.

“I never even got to meet them. Never knew who they were.. And ah,” Chris heaved a deep sigh, pausing before he continued. “Because of government regulations, everyone that loses a soulmate, whether met or not, bonded or not, I had to go through the mandatory grief counselling within six months. So, I knew that with everything that was happening, there was no way that I was going to be able to handle, ah, I couldn’t handle doing the basic therapy, so, I willingly admitted myself to a private confidential inpatient care, with a NDA twist. Of course, most facilities have those included when it comes to medical patients, but I went into one specifically for those trying to stay out of the press. Not just for grief counselling, either, but also for depression and generalised anxiety.”

Chris glanced at Rick, before looking towards Talia,

“Sort of felt like therapy for the soul for me sometimes.. And Talia, I hate that what you went through was so horrible.. Because it should have never been like that.. JellyBean.. They’re supposed to help you, listen to you.. Not assume, and from the sounds of it, that's all that they did to you.”

They hadn’t helped her, they’d listened to her parents and given in to the money that talked. Taking in a deep breath as he squeezed her hand back slightly, hating that she went through something so horrific when his time in the facility had been so therapeutic in the long run. Now, now, back to the whole point of why he was telling the story in the first place, back to the point of why everything was happening. Their soulmate marks.

“Ever since I finished my treatment, I’ve been kind of fascinated by all the theories and different studies involved with the soulmate phenomenon. It is a phenomenon, because no one can fully prove or explain how or why it even exists. Not one scientist in the world, that I have found in any publication, can scientifically prove a damn thing. For all the studies, and papers, it is all theoretical.. Even what's happening to you was nothing but a proposed theory that I’d read about, until now.”

Dividers by @saradika-graphics (roses) and @cafekitsune (trigger)

#motionless in white #miw #ricky olson #ricky olson fanfiction #original female character #soulmates #fanfiction #miw band #soulmate au #ricky olson fanfic #chris motionless #chris cerulli #chris cerulli fanfic #tw mental health #tw stalking #fic: every rose has its thorns

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