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isaacathom · 9 months

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i had a ridiculously long post in my drafts about my lil firefly knockoff thing ive got buzzing around the brainpan but what if i didnt do that, and made it much shorter

basic setting shit - different systems are daisy chained together by something called the Interstellar Highway, which are fantasy bullshit that basically tunnels through space and loop around the edge of systems for a speed boost. Because of the speeds needed, every system on a highway has a structure called the OnRamp, which basically fucking catapults you onto the highway. theyre great.

it used to be that you would stop at every system on the highway to refuel and to check ship integrity, because engine efficiency wasnt good enough for long journeys. however, in the last 40 or so years, industrial-grade engines have gotten to the stage that they can go 2-3 systems without stopping, and that has naturally meant some systems have started languishing.

the system the story takes place in is one of those, where it primarily acted as a pit stop. the only traffic it really gets now is its own import traffic, which generally goes maybe 1 system over in either direction for essential goods.

because of the lack of Business, the systems sucking shit, and a lot of people in the inner system rely on a gig-economy of delivery ships that travel between them and the onramp.

the ship at the story's core is one of these gig economy ships. it's a like 30yo ship, bought on loan by one Captain Foster Cline, whose hectic routes throughout the system have gotten him within sight of owning the ship outright, but not quite.

the crew can be divided into sub groups, starting with the "captain core":

Foster Cline, a guy in his 50-60s. pretty nice guy overall, jovial and hard-working. owns and manages the ship, and can do most of the jobs alright

Andrea Seward, lady in her 40s. shes very cautious and 'safe', preferring known routes and repeat customers. handles a lot of the paperwork and accounting, though she can apparently pilot.

Ogawa Yuuji, guy in his early 50s. really sweet guy, always trying to help and offer advice even when its unasked for. works as the ships gunner and security guy, as well as being a general strong pair of arms.

These three have known each other for years, Cline and Ogawa in particular going back to before he bought the ship, and Seward being one of their first 'hires' when they went into business.

Then we have the younger gen:

Jalen Romilly, man in his late 20s. He's a guy who likes to follow rules and structures, always wanting things planned out and knowing what's happening. He's also particularly worried about diseases and germs, so he keeps his areas of the shop spotless. He's the ship's slow and steady primary pilot.

Gideon van der Karmozijn, man in his early 30s. He's a creative guy, loves tinkering and trying new shit, and he's always confident it will work. He's the ships primary mechanic, and secondary pilot.

These two are more recent hires, the last 5 years or so, replacing an irregular churn through other pilots and mechanics over the 30yrs of the ships operation.

The basic vibe is this ship always starts its route at the OnRamp, and the captain core + Romilly will sit down and plan out what jobs they're taking for the next little bit, trying to layer as many on top of eachother as they can for maximum profit, with the understanding that they'll revisit the list at every stop to tack more onto the end, continuing a month-long rush of work before they will return to the OnRamp station for a week.

It's gig economy delivery, and it can vary a good deal. You'll get people asking for medicine, businesses asking for raw materials, groups requiring transit from point a to point b, people needing you to transfer shit on their behalf, so on. Most of them it's pretty uneventful, though the need to try and get good profit margins means sometimes tensions can flare. it can be a big mess.

The "show", such that it is structured in my mind, would begin with 2.5 ish episodes of the 'regular shit' for these guys. obviously some of their more exciting or complicated jobs, drama with someone unwilling to pay, so on. at one point they do end up picking up a package from a shady 'merchant' where the implication is that their goods are all stolen. And it's like, well... ? not much we can do. Cline has been a good client of theirs for years, yknow how it is.

then during the third episode, they follow up on a job that needs them to go to a vineyard in high country of one of the planets to pick up a delivery bound for a bar on a different planet. they land a little ways off, and the captain core traipse off to go sort everything out with the owners while the younger gen man the ship.

at which point a group a ruffians descend upon the ship to try and take it.

karmozijn manages to barricade himself and romilly into the bridge and radio for help, and ogawa bounds off. before the others can respond, they get cut off by some members of the group, and shit just fully ensues. cline and seward get into a short firefight in the woods, ending in cline being fatally shot and seward scaring off the hijackers by convincing them that the vineyard owners are coming with firepower (they are, but they were still a few minutes out). on the ship, meanwhile, ogawa ends up fighting the hijackers in the engine room, managing to defeat or scare them off but receiving serious injuries.

with the aid of the vineyard owners, they get cline's body back to the ship and karmozijn is able to very patch-repair the mechanisms in the engine room so the ship will go. because, well... they're in the inner system, aren't they? high country, no less, middle of fucking nowhere. ships damaged, going slow as shit but theyre in a rush. nearest hospital? nearest hospital with SPACE? fucking hell. romilly is eventually able to make contact with an ambulance ship thats willing to make a detour to meet them on its way to somewhere else, and thus they get on a fuking move.

they don't make it to the rendezvous before ogawa dies.

whereas there was nothing they could do for cline, ogawa shouldn't've have died. his injuries were bad, yes, but evidently manageable. with prompt medical treatment, he would've pulled through. and they couldn't get him there.

the ship, two crew down, hobbles back to the OnRamp. each begins a rapid suite of various tasks - Seward is handling job cancellations, paperwork, the police investigation, and also volunteers/demands to be the one to tell Cline's daughter what happened. Romilly is handling talking to Ogawa's family, as well as hiring a new gunner on the double so that they can try to resume work quickly. Karmozijn is handling ship repairs, trying to make it fit into their suddenly stretched budget. and everyones grieving, and everyones handling it pretty poorly.

into this hectic period, covered by a few episodes in my mind, the crew expands not by the expected one, but by three - the new crew:

Petra Cline, Foster's daughter, in her early 20s. she's an adventurous sort who loves to try new things, and in this specific instance shes pissed. She all but demands to be allowed aboard by reasoning with Seward that since the ownership deeds were in Foster's name, as his next of kin she legally owns the ship. Seward decides not to press the issue (it may come up later anyway)

Zayvia Eskarra, nb in their mid 30s. An awkward and poorly social but lovely individual, they're brought on as the ships new gunner largely by dint of being the first person to apply for the position.

Ko Xue, woman in her last 20s. She's confident and brash, working on a vibes-based level on a lot of things. after the first 4/5 crew job goes Okay Ish but not ideal, it's agreed that they need a new pilot to replace Romilly so that he can shift into a managerial position (Sewards idea), and Ko takes that primary pilot role.

A new crew of 5/6 established, they continue on, doing a whole bunch of shit. its largely the same work, very episodic job-of-the-week business. the main underlying thing is the way the crew adapts and grows close, or apart, as the case may be.

there are a few key plots that would occur throughout in the show:

Ko is an extremely qualified ship pilot. like, highway certified. The fact she's working as the primary pilot for a dinky gig ship is bizarre, and it eventually comes to light that this is effectively a side gig for her main job, which is working for a prestigious, slightly dubious inter-system organisation who have their fingers in a lot of pies. she joined because she thought they'd help her make a difference in her dead-end system, but has found that to not be the case, and is locked into an exceptionally long contract. this interferes with her work on the ship on a number of occasions, and some members of the crew are PISSED when her status is revealed because it means shes loaded. its a whole thing.

Romilly has a family (siblings and parents) he supports with his delivery money, who occur throughout depending on how he's doing. there's a lot of drama there about whether he can afford to send the majority of his paycheck their way, especially closer to the vineyard thing, and later too. complicated stuff for him.

Eskarra is, notably, the only member of the crew who is not from the system. They're actually from a place some 4 systems down the highway, having been stranded here when the ship they were working on got 'pulled over' for illegal smuggling, being briefly locked up, and then being unable to pay for passage back home. This causes a sense of disconnect, since they arent anywhere near as familiar with the system as the others, which Eskarra attempts to rectify by like. doing chores. i love them.

Ko and Karmozijn hit it off really well because they both like pushing the ship to the limit, something that upsets both Seward and Romilly, with Romilly taking particular issue with the way Ko handles the ship - he is forced to concede she is the far better pilot, however. As close as the two become, though, Ko expresses little interest in him outside of their shared interests.

Eskarra and Romilly start lowkey dating. its a whole thing

Seward basically alienates everyone aboard the ship as she tries to live up to being the kind of captain that Cline was, which she demonstrably cannot be. she takes a special dislike to Eskarra because they are 'inferior to Ogawa in several ways', many of which have nothing to do with Eskarra's job.

Petra Cline, on the other hand, gets to be on pretty good terms with the majority of the ship, though shes on better terms with the new crew than she is with the others owing to, yknow, The Situation With Her Dad. She's the main person who is still close to Seward, because shes the one person Seward isn't rude to (or the one person who gets an unforced apology from her when she is).

She also bounces between different sectors of the ship as she learns various parts of the trade - piloting from Ko, mechanics from Karmozijn, and very limited combat stuff from Eskarra (predominantly knife-based and gun safety, with very limited opportunity to actually fire the gun bc Eskarra refuses to discharge the gun on the actual ship on principle). She does not interact with Romilly much at all, lmao.

and then we hit Da Big Thing, da big plot that i have in my noggin - a few episodes long arc in the acute sense, and certainly a longer thing overall. The Party Split.

now i have no fucking idea how we get here. my vague vibe is that there's possibly a ship that crashes off the highway into something, and theres a general sense of oh. we should uh. we should do something about that. after maybe arriving to help ferry some of the passengers to the OnRamp, maybe one of them goes 'hey. my mcguffin. can you go back and get it. ill pay you to get it' and the crew goes... yeah. sure. sure we can fetch your mcguffin. just sign this thing right here to show that we're not scavengers in case anyone asks and we'll go for it. its good pay.

and basically they're hunting for this thing, and since the ships fucked its basically picking through debris, and they aren't the only ones. guess who shows up? the shady merchants from earlier! where better to steal from than a downed ship? and they heard about a valuable mcguffin 👀

conflict ensues t'fuck. seward, romilly, and eskarra basically head out on the hunt, leaving ko, karmozijn and cline (lol) on their ship. everyones under fire. this is a mess. at some point, karmozijn tells cline that the communications are being jammed and she needs to go tell the captain (seward) that, and also that the shields are busted. she agrees, books it out. she doesnt find seward, instead finding eskarra, who is maybe Understandably Unhappy that she entered what is at this point an active fire fight, gives her a knife JUST IN CASE and tells her to fuck off back to the ship, they'll deliver the message. off they go.

on the ship, karmozijn has abandoned his station and headed to the bridge, has a conversation with Ko that quickly devolves into 'we should just get out of here, this isnt worth it' which Ko seems very lukewarm on.

on the ground, Karmozijn finds Seward to relay the message, which confuses her because Ko has been communicating with her consistently throughout the whole thing, including during her conversation with Karmozijn. And the shields seem fine? Somethings up.

Karmozijn abandons his attempt to be coy and flat out asks Ko to elope with him, which she rejects. He knocks her out, seizes the controls, and ITS. GO. TIME.

Karmozijn, Ko in tow, leaves the crash site.

Seward and Eskarra, stuck out far from the ship, end up being cut off from connecting with the rest of the crew by members of the shady group, being captured.

Cline and Romilly end up meeting up at the site where their ship used to be, and witness the departure of Seward and Eskarra with the other group.

the next bit is basically an episode for each team:

Karmozijn keeps Ko under lock and key, telling her that she could just travel with him (the under appreciated mechanic), but that if she won't he plans to just drop her off on the outskirts of some town somewhere with all her things. She manages to finagle him into letting her start packing said things in preparation, then slips away from him and leaves in the emergency shuttle. he does not pursue. she puts up a report about the ship theft, particularly paging her wealthy primary employer about the matter, and heads back to the crash site.

Cline and Romilly are forced to survive together, which is somewhat difficult because they aren't close, the ship is in so many pieces that its not a super viable shelter, and they aren't in a very hospitable area. Romilly focuses on finding things for their survival (food, shelter, so on) and Cline tries to apply the things she's learned from Karmozijn to create a distress beacon. The two end up genuinely coming to some understandings about the other, as their respective skillsets compliment fairly well. its a good camping time. it is pretty dicey though.

Seward and Eskarra are taken back to the shady merchant's base of operations and interrogated about whether they found the mcguffin or know anything about it. Despite her general demeanour, Seward holds up really well under the pressure, whereas Eskarra cracks pretty early - (un?)luckily for them, they don't know anything anyway. Seward makes a few escape attempts, without Eskarra, and for which Eskarra is punished - this does nothing to change Seward's actions. It doesn't help Eskarra that it is revealed (to Seward, anyway) that Eskarra was a former contractor of the shady merchants.

Finally, Ko returns to the crash with the shuttle and picks up Romilly and Cline, gets them fed and warmed up, and then they all mutually agree that they need to at least make an attempt to rescue Seward and Eskarra. They are actually successful, despite Seward trying to convince them to not go back in for Eskarra (Romilly, their pseudo-boyfriend, insists. thank god for homosexuality). its drama

the mcguffin almost certainly ends up being in Cline's possession, or possibly Romilly's, as the two people who remain at the crash site. so they can get back to the station (possibly with a detour for a refuel) and they can get that good good money.

obviously there are still like. consequences from this. which take some time to resolve. for instance, Karmozijn still has the fucking ship. Seward has made her dislike of Eskarra pretty fucking explicit. theres shit going on. they gotta fucking figure that out. they're also down a mechanic, a role cline probably fills at least in the interim.

its a whole thing. this is all meaningless.

#story blogging #*slaps ship* these bitches gay and the shows structure follows an anime rule for some reason #karmozijns an ass but the vibe is 100% that - despite being in the crew the whole time - hes kinda. shafted?#and it was okay-ish under Cline because Foster is a generally pretty chill guy. he smooths it over #but the status quo continues under Seward and she lacks the tact to keep him chill about it #and then he gets a fucking idea in his head and tries to elope with a woman who is nooooooot into him #and thats ignoring the fact that Ko's entire vibe. her whole motive. is trying to actually help people #so peacing out in the middle of a fire fight is a bit fucked up. she'll get his ass later #ko pays for eskarra to buy a new gun (over sewards protest) and probably even tells them to. yknow #just like. save a bullet for karmozijns knee. just in case :)#she almost certainly punches his lights out when she gets to confront him over the whole thing. itll be great #the names thing is consistently surnames in this post but theres definitely some Name Stuff happening in the actual thing #because showing how people relate to each other by what names they use is so fucking cool to me #like eg everyone on the ship calls her 'Petra' with the possible exception of Zayvia Eskarra #because for the surviving crew she's always been the captains daughter. and then Xue calls everyone by first name #whereas Eskarra is not great with social cues and defaults to surnames with everybody in an effort to be respectful #things like that. its fun. i love it #also zayvia has actually met yuuji ogawa before and when they figure out thats the former gunner its like. Ohhhhh #oh you know what i think i get where sewards coming from now. yeesh

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goodgooner · 1 year

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Help elect former Gunners to the Hall of Fame!

Tony Adams, Sol Campbell, Ashley Cole and Petr Cech have been included on a 15-player shortlist for consideration

#Arsenal FC News Feed #Help elect former Gunners to the Hall of Fame!

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gunnerina · 1 year

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Icl i forgot Emi is Argentinian

#he’s just former gunner to me

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chaotic-toasters · 9 days

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wHy wOulD yOu dO tHiS iN tHe LiViNg rOoM?

Caitlin Foord x Teen!Reader (Platonic)

TW: Alludes (mentions of?) to smut, no actual graphic descriptions or anything

Minors DNI just to be safe

-------------------

"-No, of course not," you scoffed to your former teammate as you walked onto the driveway. "That's summin' Kyra would do, not me."

Jen smiled. "Well, you might do it if you're sleep deprived. You're nearly as crazy as Kyra when you don't get your rest."

You climbed the steps, pulling your key out of your pocket. "I take offense to that, Beats. No one likes being compared to Kyra, ever. Don't tell her I said tha-aUGH!"

You didn't know what you were expecting when you opened the door, but it was not your sister engaging in... sexual activities with your third captain.

"WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!" your hands flew up to cover your eyes as you stumbled about, hitting your back on the doorframe and falling over as Jen sat on the other end of the line, confused. "CAITLIN!"

The frantic rustling of clothing sounded out. "I-"

"wHy wOuLd yOu dO tHiS iN tHe LiViNg rOoM?" You shrieked, voice pitch rapidly changing as you shot to your feet. "YoUr liTtLe siStEr lIvEs wItH yOU!"

Caitlin's Aussie accent was thick with embarrassment. "Y/N, you said you wouldn't be home 'till tomorrow!"

You screamed, blindly sprinting out of the house, phone forgotten on the floor with your hands clawing at your eyes. You didn't even know where you were going, but you from the aggressive honking of cars, you'd crossed the street at least twice. Thankfully for you, your feet had brought you to a familiar house in St. Albans.

"KIM! KIM! KIIIIIM!" you sobbed, desperately banging on the wooden door as the earlier image lingered in your mind. "KIIII-HIII-HIM!"

Your captain yanked the door open, clad in old Arsenal sweats and a jumper. "What happened, Y/N? Are you alright?"

"Caitlin and and and Katie THEYAUAHAUHAUHLBLUHUUHUH!" You babbled, hands rubbing frantically at your eyes like someone had pepper-sprayed you in the face. "AUAHAABUHHUH!"

"Caitlin and Katie what, sweetheart?" Kim pulled you inside worriedly, moving you into a sitting position on the floor and joining you after closing the door. "I can't understand you."

"THEY WERE HAVING SE- SEH—"

Kim gently pried your hands from your eyes as you launched your face into her shoulder, lips pressed into a thin line. "Did you knock, kiddo?"

"THEY WERE IN THE LIVING ROOM!" you cried hysterically, shaking your head as you tried to shake the ghost image. "I DON'T 'WIKE IT!"

The Scot choked on her spit. "What?!"

As you screamed bloody murder into her shoulder, Kim reached for her phone, dialing your national team captain's number. "Steph? Can you and Leah go to Caitlin's flat? She and Katie need a stern talkin' to."

"Why?" you could hear the defender ask.

"They were doing it in the living room. Y/n's in bits."

"Put Y/N on the phone."

Kim obliged, holding the phone to your ear.

"Hey, kiddo—"

"THEY WERE DOING—THEY WERE— THEY AUHHAUGHH—" you cried again, struggling to free your hands from Kim's firm grasp. "I STILL SEE IT, I STILL SEE ITTT!"

Steph sighed. "We're on our way."

"Thanks, Steph, I'll talk to you later. Bye," Kim hung up the phone, wrapping you up in a tight hug as you squirmed. "It's okay, Y/N, it's okay."

You dug your face deeper into her shoulder with a whine. "I don't wanna go back there, Kimmy. I don't wanna."

She murmured her agreement. "You can stay in the spare room tonight, kiddo. I'll have Steph and Leah pick up some of your stuff, and we'll figure out the rest tomorrow."

-------------------

"Hey, Y/N, how's it‐ why are your eyes so red?" Cloe questioned as she sat next to you in her own cubby, concerned. "Have you been crying?"

"Maybe," you answered hoarsely. "I don't know."

Steph whispered something into the Canadian's ear, your teammates eyes filling with surprise and pity. "Oof, sorry, kid."

"Me too, Cloe," you mumbled miserably. "Me too."

The last of the gunners filed into the changing room, your sister one of them. "Y/N, could you step outside so we ca—"

You screamed at the top of your lungs, jolting away and diving into Cloe's arms. "NO!"

"Give her time, Cait," Steph advised, directing her away from you. "You might've scarred her for life."

You sniffled in Cloe's comforting hold. "Why did you have to be the naked one?"

Katie shrugged apologetically. "She is a pillow princess."

You shrieked. "EWWW!"

What am I doing

#Woso x reader #Caitlin Foord x Reader #Caitlin Foord #Arsenal wfc x Reader #Arsenal women x Reader #Arsenal women #Arsenal wfc #kim little #cloe lacasse

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adascore · 3 days

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Hello! Not sure if you’re taking requests but would you consider doing an addition to TSS where young!arsenal reader was starting before Beth and Viv came back and has been benched majority of the time since (Kyra core☹️). Maybe during like the west ham game was one of the subs thrown on halfway through and after the loss made a snarky comment about “being thrown on to unfuck everything” type of thing to another teammate and Viv/beth overhear and think she’s talking about them (maybe they’re already a little insecure about losing such an “easy” game, self doubt post ACL) and things are super frosty and weird at home until one of them snaps and makes a comment about how they still wouldn’t have won even if R started. Hurt/comfort angst but with a happy ending!! Not sure if any of that strikes your fancy but I had the thought and you’re so talented:) no worries if not!!!

TO JUMP THE GUN(NERS)

pairings: arsenal x teen!reader / meadema x teen!reader / kyra cooney-cross x arsenal!reader

warnings: the west-ham match. swearing. angst. awkwardness.

author’s note: OMG LOVE THIS IDEA ! like this was right up my alley I felt like 😭 thank you so much, and I hope you enjoy the story!

masterlist

February 4, 2024 - Essex, England

It had become a routine, seeing her name and number on the bench. She took a glance at Kyra, a knowing look in her eyes.

The young Arsenal homegrown wondered where it all had gotten wrong. Well, she knew the answer, but it wasn't exactly something she could say out loud to anyone.

She was transported back to the 2022/23 season, where she would warm the bench until either Vivianne or Beth were too tired or they needed to be rested for the next match.

Their injuries had changed everything.

Y/N not only became a regular starter, but became a vital part of their game. Her absence would be noticed.

She scored the goals that got them to the semifinals of the Champions League, keeping them level with 2x champions Wolfsburg.

However, Beth and Vivianne were back now. Alessia's arrival also didn't help much, the former Manchester United player having cemented herself into the starting line-up.

It also didn't help that Jonas was not a fan of rotating. Only in specific Conti Cup matches or against what he deemed 'weaker' teams in the league would he make changes to the usual starting XI.

In other words, she was back to step 1.

That's why it was hard to watch her teammates falling 2-1 behind against West Ham, with no one seeming to find an answer or any will to turn the game around. It was a painful spectacle.

In the 63rd minute, Jonas decided to throw herself, Kyra and Cloé in the match, and take out Vivianne, Victoria and Beth. It was a desperate attempt, and the three Gunners found themselves on the pitch, tasked with the challenging mission of trying to fix everything that had gone wrong so far.

Y/N and Cloé quickly created some chances but the West Ham defense or the swift reflexes of Mackenzie Arnold saw them go in vain.

The teenager could see the expressions of her teammates on the bench, visibly frustrated with how the match had unfolded since Alessia's successful header.

Vivianne couldn't hide the discontent in her eyes as she sat with a subtle shake of her head. Her partner, sitting beside her, noticed and Beth patted her thigh, offering silent support as they continued to watch their team scramble for a late equalizer.

As the final whistle blew, the disappointment within the team was high. Y/N did her usual post-match routine, and congratulated all the West Ham players on their win, while giving and receiving solace from her own teammates.

The teen found Kyra again, someone who she had found a friendship in over the months the Australian had joined the Gunners.

''You alright?'' The midfielder asked her, a dejected tone in her voice.

Y/N nodded. ''Yeah, you?''

''Not too great, but there are worse things in life.'' Kyra responded, trying to put the loss in perspective.

''True,'' the striker agreed, ''I can't believe he keeps putting us in these positions.''

Kyra nodded. ''You think he would learn after Tottenham.'' She sighed.

''Apparently, we're not good enough to start, but when he needs us to unfuck everything that happened, then he knows who we are.'' Y/N said, her frustration evident. The unfair treatment of some players during the season lingered in the air, leaving a bitter taste after the defeat.

As the youngsters continued their conversation on their way to the locker room, Vivianne and Beth, unintentionally overhearing their discussion, exchanged puzzled glances.

''Did you hear that? 'Unfuck everything'?'' Beth repeated her housemate's words to her partner.

Vivianne's brow furrowed as she processed what was said. ''Yeah,'' the Dutchwoman breathed out, ''not very nice.'' A hint of sadness lingered in her voice. It stung that their efforts were being discussed in such terms, especially by the young girl they were living with.

They didn't say much else to one another as they strolled through the corridor.

The atmosphere in the locker room was subdued, void of any banter and entertaining chats. Most of the players were already there as the couple walked in.

Beth took a glimpse at Y/N and Kyra who still seemed in a discussion with one another, although they were whispering now.

''Girls, we're a lot better than this.'' Kim broke the ice, a neutral expression on her face.

Everyone nodded at the captain, the collective disappointment from the match was visible. ''Well, it's done, we can't change anything about it. So, everyone just do a reset, try to get some sleep or distract yourselves on the bus, and I expect everyone with fresh minds and legs at training.''

The team nodded and weakly applauded Kim's small speech.

As the team began to disperse, Y/N caught Beth's eye, offering a faint smile in greeting. However, the winger's response was noticeably strained, her usually warm demeanor replaced by a subtle tension.

"Everything okay?" The younger one ventured, her concern evident.

Beth's smile faltered slightly, her gaze flickering away before returning to meet Y/N's. "Yeah, everything's fine." She replied, though her words sounded hollow even to her own ears.

The striker's brow furrowed further, a flicker of uncertainty clouding her features. "Are you sure?" She pressed gently, not used to this awkwardness from her teammate.

"I... yeah, I'm sure." She retorted, her voice tinged with irritation.

"Okay..." Y/N trailed off, unsure of how to proceed. Sensing the dismissiveness between them, she offered a hesitant smile before turning back to where she had been talking with Lia.

As her housemate walked away, Beth's expression hardened, a pang of guilt gnawing at her conscience. She knew she shouldn't act like this towards her, but her words had really struck a nerve for some reason and it was hard to pretend it didn't.

The drive home on the bus wasn't that different, though the atmosphere was more subdued due to the loss. Y/N and Kyra were seated next to each other, Katie and Caitlin sitting on the other side of them.

''You alright, Y/N?'' Caitlin asked, noticing the youngster's quietness.

Y/N looked up, glancing away from her nails to the older Australian player. She hesitated answering, not knowing if it was appropriate to say anything about her interaction with Beth.

She sat up straight and motioned for the three of them to huddle together over the small table. They got her message and did just that.

''Did anything happen on the bench or something? Cause I had this weird exchange with Meado, and it's just stuck in my head.'' She explained, her voice hushed.

They all frowned at her words. ''No, she was just frustrated about the game, but so was everyone else.'' Caitlin responded.

''What happened?'' Katie chimed in, curious to know about this exchange.

''I don't know. She was looking at me in the locker room, and I smiled at her, but she, I don't know, just looked weird at me. I asked her if she was alright, but she was kinda distant with me? She responded a little irritated so I left her alone, but it was weird.'' Y/N gave a small summary of the interaction.

"That is strange." Kyra mused, breaking the silence that had settled over their huddle.

They nodded at her words, agreeing with the young Australian.

''I didn't notice anything.'' Caitlin said with a pout, feeling sorry she couldn't help her younger teammate out. ''Me neither, kiddo.'' Katie added, a similar expression on her face.

Y/N smiled sadly, disappointed she wasn't any wiser on Beth. Katie rubbed her arm once she noticed her dejected expression. ''Hey, I wouldn't worry about it. It's a tough loss.''

The youngster nodded at the Irishwoman's words. ''Yeah, you're right.''

Katie was not right.

As soon as she got in the car with the beloved couple it was clear that something had gone down for them to act in such a sour mood. Vivianne's knuckles were white against the steering wheel, while Beth stared out of the window, her expression unreadable.

Sensing the palpable tension, Y/N shifted uncomfortably in her seat. The youngster wanted to break the silence, but the words wouldn't come out. It felt like they were stuck in her throat.

The drive home felt like forever. Every minute made the atmosphere worse. Y/N tried to catch Vivianne or Beth's eye, hoping for some sign that things would get better, but there was nothing.

Car rides after losses were never filled with much conversation, but it had never been like this.

A wave of relief went through her as the car was parked in front of their apartment complex, longing for the comfort of her room where she could hide from whatever the situation was.

Y/N couldn't even come up with a guess on what had transpired. Did they have a fight? Did she do something? Did someone else do something?

She had absolutely no clue.

However, the tension seemed to follow them into their shared home. The silence had become even more deafening with each step they took.

Beth disappeared into her room without a word, while Vivianne headed straight for the kitchen, her movements stiff and mechanical. Y/N stood in the hallway, feeling like an outsider in her own home.

Their behaviors made her feel anxious, feeling that knot inside her stomach. What had happened during the game? What had caused them to retreat into themselves like this?

Unable to handle any of it longer, Y/N tentatively approached the Dutchwoman in the kitchen. "Um, Viv?" She began, her voice small.

Vivianne glanced up, her expression guarded. "Yeah?” She replied, accent heavy.

The younger girl hesitated, unsure of how to broach the subject. "I, uh, did, uh, something happen at the game?" She stammered, her words stumbling over each other in her haste to get everything out.

The striker's eyebrows furrowed. "What are you talking about?” She asked, her face neutral.

Her response only added to the youngest one's confusion. It seemed as though they were both dancing around a subject neither wanted to address.

"I-I just... noticed things were a bit off between everyone after the match," Y/N explained, her voice barely above a whisper, "and, well, the car ride home was... a bit weird, you know.”

Vivianne's expression softened slightly, though her guard remained up. ''Don't worry about it. Just… frustration from the game.''

But Y/N couldn't shake the feeling that there was more to it than just frustration. She wanted to press further, but the fear of causing further conflict held her back.

Instead, she offered a hesitant nod. ''Okay, good.'' She murmured to the floor, retreating back to her room with a heavy heart.

The Arsenal homegrown player pulled her phone out of her pocket, searching up Kyra's contact. It only took a few rings for the Australian to pick up, she was probably already on her phone as she was called.

''Hey.'' Her accent momentarily bringing a smile to Y/N's face.

''Hey, you're home?''

''Yeah, just arrived. What's up?''

There was a brief pause before Y/N continued. ''Things have gotten a bit weirder since, uh, on the bus.''

''Shit. What happened?'' She asked, her voice filled with genuine worry.

''It's just... the tension at home is almost suffocating," she explained, ''it was completely silent the entire time we were driving home, and when we got home, Beth immediately went to her room. I tried to ask Viv about, but she told me it was just frustrations, but it clearly is not just that.''

There was a moment of silence as Kyra processed Y/N's words. "That doesn't sound good," she finally replied, ''you really have no idea what might have happened? Maybe they had a fight or something?''

Y/N shook her head, even though her teammate couldn't see it. "No, that's the thing. I'm completely lost." She admitted, frustration lacing her words.

''Same. I wish I knew what to say to help.'' Kyra said softly.

''It's alright, Ky. Thanks for letting me ramble.'' Y/N chuckled, appreciating the opportunity to unload her worries onto her friend.

''It's fine, honestly. It must not be fun to be in this situation,'' the Matilda replied, feeling for her friend, ''if anything else happens you can always let me know, okay? I'm gonna have some dinner now.''

Y/N smiled gratefully. "Thanks, Ky. I really appreciate it.”

''Anytime. Take care, I'll see you at training.''

''You too. Bye, bye.'' They bid each other goodbye before hanging up the phone.

Y/N prepared to leave her room again, wanting to check if Vivianne had started dinner yet or not.

Just as she stepped into the hallway, she nearly collided with Beth, who was coming out of her room with a tight-lipped expression. The sudden encounter caught them both off guard.

''Shit, sorry.'' The younger one apologized first, giving her housemate an awkward glance.

''It's alright,'' Beth brushed off, ''uh, were you on the phone just now?" She asked, her brow furrowing slightly.

Y/N nodded. ''Uh, yeah, with Kyra.''

Beth's expression shifted, a flicker of something unreadable crossing her features. "Oh, Kyra." She murmured, her voice tight.

The younger girl simply stared at the winger, not knowing what to say to her words. "Is everything okay?" Y/N ventured, her voice hesitant as she searched Beth's face for any sign of what might be bothering her.

Beth's lips pressed into a thin line, and for a moment, she seemed lost in thought. When she finally spoke, her words were tinged with a hint of irritation. ''Everything's alright.''

Y/N offered a small, uneasy smile and nodded. "Oh, okay." She said, though her words felt hollow even to her own ears.

With a nod of acknowledgment, Beth turned to walk away. As she watched Beth disappear around the corner, she wondered if it had been something she had done. However, she couldn't recall saying or doing anything that day that would have provoked this kind of demeanor from the couple.

The young striker walked into the living room, noticing Vivianne bustling about in the kitchen. But what caught Y/N's attention was the hushed whispers exchanged between the couple, Beth and Vivianne not being subtle about their gossiping.

A sense of discomfort washed over the youngster as she hesitated in the doorway, unsure whether to interrupt or retreat unnoticed. But before she could make a decision, the Dutchwoman glanced up and caught her eye, her expression inscrutable.

''Hey, dinner is almost ready. Just some leftover pasta from yesterday.'' She informed Y/N, her tone somewhat forced as she attempted to maintain a facade of normalcy.

Y/N forced a smile. ''Nice, thanks, Viv.'' She answered, trying to ignore the awkwardness that hung in the air.

She retreated to the couch, feeling as if she wasn't welcome in the small space. Something was off, and she couldn't help but feel like she was on the outside looking in.

She scrolled on her phone for a few minutes before Vivianne called her to the table as the food was ready. As they gathered around the dinner table, the atmosphere remained strained, the tension thick enough to cut with a knife.

Vivianne served up the leftover pasta, her movements brisk as she avoided making eye contact with anyone. Beth sat across from Y/N, her expression unreadable as she picked at her food.

Y/N tried to focus on her food, but the uneasy feeling in the pit of her stomach made it difficult to swallow.

For a few moments, the only sound was the clinking of forks against plates, the silence punctuated only by the occasional awkward cough or clearing of throat.

Finally, unable to bear the tension any longer, Y/N opened her mouth. "So, um, what did you guys think about the match?'' She asked the pair, her voice coming out more high than she had intended.

As if on cue, Vivianne and Beth glanced up from their plates at the same time.

''It was tough, but it shouldn't have been tough. We lacked a clear tactic.'' The experienced striker answered, filling up the silence.

Y/N nodded, relieved at least one of them responded to her attempt at conversation. She took a peek at Beth, who did not seem amused in the slightest to talk about the surprising defeat earlier that day.

''It was just another match of us fucking everything up, and you kids having to unfuck it all.'' Beth said, her tone dripping with sarcasm.

The youngest's eyes widened slightly at the cutting remark, not expecting those words to come out of the Brit's mouth.

Vivianne shifted uncomfortably in her seat, casting a quick glance at Y/N before fixing her gaze on her partner. "Beth, that's enough.'' Her voice was stern, warning Beth that this was not the way to go about this.

But Beth ignored her girlfriend, her eyes fixed on Y/N with an intensity that made her squirm. ''No, she needs to learn to not talk about teammates that way, especially the ones that have just gotten back from serious injuries, and need time to reintegrate into the group.''

Y/N felt a flush of embarrassment creeping up her neck, she cast a desperate look at Vivianne, silently pleading for her to intervene and diffuse the situation before it escalated any further.

''Beth, I wasn't-''

''You weren't what? You weren't talking shit to Kyra about us right after the match? You weren't talking shit about us to Kyra on the phone just now?'' The oldest continued in an accusing tone.

Vivianne let out a sigh, her frustration evident as she attempted to defuse the situation. ''Beth.'' She said firmly, her gaze shifting between the two other people at the table.

''I wasn't talking shit about you guys. I would never do that.'' Y/N managed to let out, offended at the mere idea of her not appreciating the two women who'd let her move in with them a 1,5 years ago.

''Y/N, we heard you. On the pitch after the match, with Kyra.'' Beth responded bluntly.

Y/N swallowed hard, slightly ashamed of being caught. ''We were just... we were just frustrated, okay? That comment wasn't directed at any of you guys, it was more at Jonas, to be fair.''

The couple grew silent at the admission, realizing they had greatly misunderstood the two young girls' conversation. ''About Jonas?'' Vivianne repeated, her voice carrying a note of embarrassment.

The young striker nodded. ''Yeah, me and Kyra have just been a bit upset with our game time, that's all. It felt like a repeat of the Tottenham game.''

Beth and Vivianne exchanged a glance, coming to a silent understanding. ''We're sorry for jumping the gun on that one, darling. We really thought we needed to teach you some manners.'' The Brit nervously apologized with a chuckle.

''It's alright, we probably should've been a bit more discreet.'' Y/N brushed her apology off with a hand gesture.

''No, you two are in your full right to complain.'' Vivianne retorted, agreeing on the playing time matter.

The teenager waited a few moments before elaborating. ''I don't mind sitting on the bench, it's great to get rest, you know? But it almost feels like he doesn't trust me to get the game starting or something. I like to think I did great last season, so this kind of sucks.'' She opened up, not having voiced these thoughts to anyone but Kyra.

''You did amazing last season, you stepped up when we needed someone and the team will never forget that.'' Beth smiled, squeezing the youngster' s hand.

''It seems that Jonas forgot.'' Y/N muttered bitterly, looking down at her empty plate.

The couple silenced themselves at her mumbled words, not knowing what the appropriate response would be to cheer her up about the situation. They were indirectly responsible for the young girl to not get as much game time anymore, so whatever they would tell her, she would most likely not feel much better afterwards.

''Just focus on what you're doing right now. Show up to training, recover well, maximize everything in the minutes you do get. Show him that he should trust you to start, and that you deserve to have that spot in the line-up.'' Vivianne chimed in, her voice soft but resolute.

Y/N nodded at the older woman's words, though her demeanor still seemed dejected. ''Yeah, I'll continue to do that.'' It came out somewhat passive aggressive.

''I know it doesn't fix the situation, but you're my personal star girl, regardless whether you play or not.'' Beth softly smiled at her.

The teen managed to crack a small smile back, appreciating the sentiment. ''Thanks, Beth.''

''You're mine too.'' Vivianne added.

''Hey, that's my compliment for her! Find another one if you want to be cute!'' Beth scolded her partner, dramatically feigning annoyance.

The Dutchwoman frowned. ''Everyone calls her ‘star girl'! You're not original either!'' She pouted back.

Y/N couldn't help but let out a chuckle at the banter between the couple, happily accepting the momentary distraction from her frustrations.

Beth playfully rolled her eyes. ''At least I'm complimenting her!''

''Sorry that I was just giving useful advice, Bethany.'' Vivianne retorted.

''Useful.'' The Brit repeated, her voice heavily tinged with sarcasm.

Vivianne's mouth gaped, pretending to be offended. ''It was useful! That's what I would have wanted to hear at 19 year-old.'' She defended herself.

''19 year-old's want to hear praise, Viv. They want to be called star girls, not receive a lecture.'' Beth quickly replied, with a smirk.

''Y/N, it was useful, right?'' The older striker turned towards the teenager.

''Yeah, Y/N, tell Miss Miedema how useful her advice was.'' Beth chorused her words, grinning from ear-to-ear.

The youngster simply glanced between the two of them, before picking up her empty plate and standing up from her seat. ''I'm taking this as my sign to leave.''

She ignored their pleas with a satisfied grin, making her way to the kitchen to dump her plate, and walking back to her room.

The couple watched her depart, sharing a knowing look, a hint of amusement dancing in their eyes. ''She's gonna call Kyra, isn't she?'' Vivianne chuckled.

''She so is.'' Beth agreed with a laugh.

requests are always welcome!

#woso x reader #woso fanfics #arsenal wfc x reader #arsenal x reader #woso imagine #woso fic #beth mead x reader #vivianne miedema x reader #kyra cooney cross x reader #meadema

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picturesofthearsenal · 10 months

Text

Newcastle United's Joe Willock in action during the Premier League match between Newcastle United and Arsenal FC at St. James Park on May 7, 2023 in Newcastle upon Tyne, United Kingdom. (Photo by Alex Dodd - CameraSport via Getty Images)

#joe willock #newcastle united #former gunners #premier league #arsenal #070523

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writingoddess1125 · 6 months

Note

Since you wrote dee and Bee as adults drabble will you be doing the same for shank’s daughter

I gotcha! Had this brewing for a bit but hope you like it!

Vivian As A Adult

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Check out Old Man Series! <-

• Vivian set off on her own, wanting to be like her Idol Monkey D. Luffy- The Pirate King.

• Being trained by The world's current best Gunman and a Yonko had some extreme benefits. She was training to be the Best Gunner in the world. However no one really paid much attention to that- It was more that she was a pretty girl who looked fairly similar to a famous Emperor of the sea.

• She set out on her own at 17, wanting to get a head start on her pirate career... which had started out as sort of a flop-

• No one wanted her on their crew, both out of fear of what it could lead to from her father and doubts about her abilities. Assuming she must be a spoiled brat with her ego inflated-

• And truth be told- Vivian was terrible with money... horrible infact- She went broke in less then a month and with bleeding pockets didn't know where to turn-

• Till she stumbled on a old acquaintance- non other then her former childhood crush Dracule Alucare- He had recognized her immediately and bought her a meal. The two talking and agreeing to temporarily join together- Especially since

• Both their navigation skills were lacking however and it didn't take long to find trouble again- This time by Alucares old 'Ex' who thoroughly beat his ass {Literally} and took the ship captive.

• Knowing if both of them were captured it would lead to trouble, so Vi being small enough to take cover on the ship and watched Alucare get taken. Knowing he wouldn't be killed off that quickly especially since Lyra seemed to have a vendetta against him and wanted to prolong it.

• So once sure the coast was clear she set off to rescue Alucare and make sure they didn't get killed.

• Weeding through the security to make sure it was light for the escape. She met up with Alucare and a grew of blue haired twins- Later learning they were The Buggy Twins.. Which sounded familiar but she didn't want to think too much on it.

• The teenagers managing a narrow escape from the Marines and setting off to the sea- truthfully without a true plan and only wanting to save their own asses-

• "Where is my Bounty?!" She said screamed looking over the stack of new wanted posters that had been delivered- it had been a week since the Marine Ship incident and Vivian didnt see a wanted poster for herself anywere! Groaning into the table as she felt the papers being yanked from her hands.

Alucare looking over the posters and snorting a laugh. She glared at her peer as he stared at her..

• Despite all of this, Vivian is probably the best marksman of this era- A true devil in her craft as she can hit any target bullseye. The Marines hadn't forgotten her nor her abilties on the navel ship being forgotten... as it seemed the reason the ship seemed to quiet was that the Marines later found 63 men with perfect bullet holes in their forehead well stashed away on the ship.

"Maybe you have too low of a Bounty?-" Alucare teased, earning a harsher glare from the red head who smacked him in the head with a spoon which he got pelted with perfectly on thw forehead-.

Clearly wanting to mess with her as he reached into his shirt picket and slammed down his own, Vi snatching it quickly and damn near hissed as she read the paper-

'GOLD GAZE' ALUCARE

Updated Bounty: Formally 50,000,000 Berry

Wanted Dead or Alive

Current Bounty: 85,000,000

'Gold Gaze' Seriously?" Vivian sighed at the choice of Nickname. Alucare shrugging as well-

"Well I didn't pick it.." He defended, the twins now coming up to see what the commotion was all about. Alucare sharing his wanted poster with them-

"Not Bad!" Bee said and him and Alucare shared a high five- Weirdly the two seemingly growing close in a chaotic lawful and chaotic evil sort of way..

"Your guys bounty is higher" Alucare pointed out which Dee shrugged at.

"Yeah but you got a better Nickname then us-" Dee said- As the three repeated 'Gold Gaze' in a series of different voices. Vivian staring at them all like she was in a sick form of hell...

"I hate you guys..."

• Shanks of course keeps track of Vivian, even if she's out on his own he had eyes and ears everywhere.

• It seemed the marksman of the Pirates had made sure security was light-

He smiles brightly and starts to laugh hysterically- He didn't know if this was some sick form of Karma or the universe repeating itself-

However that morning it seemed to be the newspaper that informed him- Opening up he went to see what new thing was happening his eyes widening at what he saw.

New Pirates on the Scene!

🌅 The Sunset Pirates! 🌅

Marines say they disapeared and appeared with the rise and fall of the sun-

Including In the Crew-

- Dee Dee The Jester - 150,000,000 Berry

- Bee Bee The Joker - 150,000,000 Berry

- 'Gold Gaze' Alucare - 85,000,000 Berry

And New Pirate {Unknown Name- nicknamed}

'Crimson Shot' - 85,000,000 Berry

- Wanted Dead or Alive -

Shanks shook his head, recognizing his daughter's skills immediately and the rough sketch of her as well- He knew her identity would be revealed soon enough. However that didn't matter, if anything it would boost her credibility.

"Good Job Vi- You did it.."

#x reader #one peice x reader #one piece #one peice live action #one piece shanks #shanks one piece #dad shanks #red haired shanks #shanks #dracule alucare #buggy twins #Vivian one piece

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outsideratheart · 1 year

Text

What’s Love Without Tragedy (Alex Scott x reader)

A/N: This one is for @wosoobsessed I hope you like it and it has enough angst for you.

There is a difference between having something private and keeping something a secret. You knew this, your girlfriend at the time did not. At first it wasn’t an issue because the sneaking around was fun but then you told a select few you were dating and it gave you a taste of what it’s like not to hide. You knew you wanted the world to know Alex Scott was yours, if only she shared the same enthusiasm.

In the end, the secrecy was the demise of your relationship and you made the decision that, whilst you loved Alex with every fibre of your being, you couldn’t hide anymore. It wasn't an ultimatum but you thought she would choose you over public perception.

5 years past and you healed. Your heart wasn’t whole as a large amount of it belonged to Alex but you found to way to stay friends or as close to friends as two people can be with the past the two of you had.

The two of you had moved on but the past came back to haunt you and it did so at the hands of your ex girlfriend.

Alex Scott How (Not) To Be Strong. It is the book you should have read when the author gave it to you which now that you think about it was long before anyone else got a copy.

A few days after it’s release you found yourself the centre of attention. Looks are exchanged by your team mates but their gaze ultimately falls on you.

“Have you read Alex’s book?” Leah whispers closely as not to bring attention to the both of you. Deep down she knew the answer because one, you wouldn’t be this calm if you had and two, Alex would have told her your reaction.

“She’s keeps texting me about it but I haven’t had the time” just as you finish your sentence your phone goes off “this must her her again”

Leah watches over your shoulder. She sees the notification and it wasn’t from Alex, it was your mentions on twitter.

“I don’t understand” you whisper in disbelief.

Your twitter was flooded with details of Alex and yours relationship. You read anecdote after anecdote of moments with Alex but you didn’t understand how they knew.

“Her book” Leah answers your unasked question “this is why she wanted you to read it”

“Read it!” You raised your voice “she should have discussed this with me before writing it! This is just as much my story as it is hers. How dare she share these details with the world and not have the decency to tell me first”

Given the change in team since your break up there was only a couple of players that knew about your relationship with the former gunner. The faces of those that didn’t know were priceless.

What was Alex thinking? She told you about the book and what it would be about but she failed to mentioned the part in the book about how she refused to put a label on her sexuality, the part which included how she fell in love with her Arsenal team mate.

In that moment, Colony was the last place you wanted to be and given the training was over you didn’t have a reason to be there for a second longer. With no see you laters or good training, you leave.

The days that follow are quiet as you only leave your house to train but it’s what you need. The time spent in your own company allows you think about what you’re going to do. You can’t avoid Alex, well you could but it wouldn’t be professional.

Leah had told Alex about your reaction and much to the blonde’s disbelief as she thought you wouldn’t have minded. You always encouraged her to be her true self and that is what she is doing.

“Why didn’t you tell her what you wrote?” Leah spoke through the phone.

“I told her to read the book Leah” Alex, in her eyes, did the right thing. It wasn’t as if she was asking permission, she just wanted to know if she would need your forgiveness. Now it’s clear that is definitely the case.

“Alex you’ve handled this badly. You say you loved her and that you knew her in and out. If that is true then you know how she is hurting right now. You went behind her back and told the world the love story that belonged to the two of you”

“She isn’t answering any of my calls” Alex had tried numerous to call you after she saw the reactions fans had on social media and how they were calling you a hypocrite. You preached truth and honesty yet in their eyes you hid the biggest part of yourself.

“She isn’t answering anyone’s calls. The only time we see her is at training. I suggest trying to speak her after a game and hope she is in a good mood”

Alex took Leah’s advice and gave you space. A couple of weekends later she was covering an England friendly with the BBC and given that you were the captain she knew you would be there.

After the match you were given a headset that linked up with the BBC studios. It is then that you hear her voice and wish that Gabby Logan would the one to interview but the world wasn’t easy that way.

You keep your answers short and sweet not wanting to show too much emotion in your replies. Fury was building in your belly and you knew that now, on live tv, was not the time for you and Alex to hash things out.

“It’s always a pleasure speaking to you Y/N. I’ll let you get back to celebrating with the team” Alex waits to you reply, for you to say it nice to talk to her too only it doesn’t happen. You remove the headset, the only reply coming in the form of a nod and fake smile.

The pace in which you walk is slower than normal as you make your way around the stadium thanking the fans even stopping to sign autographs & take photos, anything that will delay you going back into that locker room because you know who will be waiting for you. So far the team hasn’t brought up your past relationship with their former team mate but the ones that knew about it, Lucy and Jill, they keep you close just in case you need them. It’s why when you enter the locker room you notice their faces first and the way their heads tilt towards the physio room.

“Y/N” Leah is the one to speak first and you shake your head “she just wants five minutes”

The internal battle you are facing must be evident on your face as Lucy comes over to you to offer you some reassurance.

“Do you want her to leave?” She doesn’t get a response, your focus is on the room which holds your ex girlfriend.

“I —“

“Y/N please” Alex feels all eyes on her as she walks through the locker room and towards you.

She reaches out for your hand and you hated how you body betrayed you. Her touch reminded you of home and for a brief moment you allow yourself to enjoy the feeling of her skin on yours. You were overwhelmed and you had been for the past few days, the only thing that has been on your mind is Alex.

“What do you want?” It was a stupid question one that didn’t need asking.

“To talk”

You gesture you hands in a way that tells her to go ahead.

“Not here”

“Why not? They all know about us now thanks to you. Me, meanwhile had to lie to them for years so I’m not hiding anymore. If you want to talk then talk but I’m not leaving this locker room” you sit down in your locker as a way to prove that you’re being serious.

Alex didn’t know what to do. She knew that this was the best chance she would get at talking to you but in front of your team mates and her past team mates, it wasn’t exactly ideal.

“I asked you to read the book”

Out the corner on your eye you see Leah bury her head in her hand and Lucy roll her eyes. Good, you think, it’s not’s just you that can’t believe this is how Alex is starting.

“Yes you did and in that message you could have told me you planned on exposing our relationship to the world but instead you to choose to keep it a secret. Then again you always liked your secrets, it’s what ended our relationship in the first place”

“That’s not fair. I was telling my truth“

“No, what’s not fair is for you tell the world about us without thinking of me at all. As for truth, I don’t know how you dare. It wasn’t just your story you were telling, it was ours”

That’s what it was; your story, the one you shared with her for many years.

“I have spent the past week reliving the past, all the moments that brought me the most happiness then caused me the most pain. You broke me Alex just like you did all those years ago”

The angry front you had put on came falling down with the last sentence you spoke. You were hurt that Alex didn’t think your relationship was important enough to discuss, instead she told the world as if it was nothing. On the top of that it led you to question your relationship: if Alex was comfortable enough to share her sexuality with the world now, was she back then but it was you who she was ashamed of.

You wasn’t aware you were even close to crying until you felt a tear fall down your cheek, one which you are quick to wipe away before anyone sees it.

“Alex I think it’s time you leave” Lucy comes to your defence. She knew this was a bad idea.

“No, I’m leaving. I’ll meet you all back at the hotel” you grab a jacket and leave the locker room.

Your head hangs low as you wander the halls that you hope will lead you back out onto the pitch. Just over half an hour ago you were on cloud nine having won with with the lionesses, now you feel broken and beaten. There was no light at the end of this tunnel, an apology would no longer fix this and you didn't know how you and Alex could move forward.

With the stadium empty you sit on the bench allowing your mind to wander but it goes no further than the brown eyed woman that you once loved with all your heart.

Alex faced the same fate. She never imagined that her book would cause this much fallout and she definitely didn't expect to lose you again but it was obvious now that she had made a mistake, one which has deeply hurt you. The eyes of your team mates burn into her and she cannot help but feel like prey that's about to get attacked by its predator.

"Do you know how hard it's been for her?" Lucy makes her way towards the retired player "She loves you Alex, always has and always will. The secrecy isn't the main problem here, it's the fact that you happily told the world now when you wouldn't before. You know Y/N doubts her worth and you have made that worse by doing what you did"

She hasn't even thought out that. Alex thought you were mad because she made a made a decision alone when she should have discussed it with you first.

"You should go find her" Leah suggests much to her team mates disagreement.

"No" Lucy interrupts.

"No Lucy. Despite Alex's actions and Y/N's words, this is between them and only them"

Alex sends the blonde a look mentally thanking her before walking towards the door.

"She'll be —“

"I know where she is" Alex says knowing full well the place you would have gone given where you are and she was right. She watches you from afar hoping that you will look over and give her some indication that you are happy for her to be there but you don't. Instead she sees you lean over with you head in your hands and seconds later your body starts to shake slightly; you were crying.

Wanting nothing more than to comfort you, Alex abandons her need for permission.

Your eyes are fixated on the green grass beneath you, that is until you view is obscured by a pair of trainers. What follows is something that always brings you comfort even more so by the person who does it. Alex’s hands begin rubbing circles over your shoulder blades and you're not sure if it your need to be held or the desire to be close to the brunette but your arms wrap around her waist. The close contact immediately steadies your breathing and the tears subside.

"Why did you do it?" you ask whilst keeping your current position.

It was a question that meant several different things. Why did Alex tell the world? Why didn't she tell you? Why now?

"I thought you would be happy"

"Alex I am happy that you're finally telling the world your truth but doing so by outing our relationship without talking to me about it first, why?"

Again it was another question.

"You didn't have an issue about people knowing before, in fact you told me you wanted the world to know so I didn't thing you would be so against people knowing now" rightly or wrongly, this is how Alex saw it.

"I'm not"

"Then why are you upset?

"Was I the problem? Did you not want the world to know that you were in a relationship with me?"

When you looked up at the older woman she sees the pain in your eyes and the toll the last couple of days have taken on you. The dark circles under your eyes were a give away that you hadn't been sleeping.

"Y/N I am not ashamed of you" Alex couldn't believe what she was hearing.

"You're not?" she shakes her head "Then I don't get it Alex. When it was me and you, you didn't want anyone to know about us but now i'm out of the picture you want everyone to know. How do expect me to take that?"

"Back then it wasn't you, it was me"

What was that suppose to mean?

"You very confident and one of the best football players I have ever seen, you still are" your cheeks heat up a the compliment "You were open and honest but the biggest thing was that you were 8 years younger than me, I know you were mature but the age mattered. You became a fan favourite and I didn't want our relationship to tarnish your reputation"

"Alex I don't care what other people think"

"But I do or at least I did back then" Alex knew that she shouldn't have let other people affect her relationship but the thought of being the hot topic within the women’s football world scared her.

"It hurt being left in the dark about something this important. You told the world about us and I had no idea. I walked into Colney and I felt like a circus animal the way everyone was staring at me"

A small chuckle escapes Alex's lips before you had the chance to cover it.

"It's not funny"

The woman standing in front of you mumbles an apology.

"So you're not mad that everyone knows about us?"

"I'm not. It's what I've wanted for years. I'm mad that you didn't tell me you were going to do it, i’m mad that every one knows our story through your heartbreak and i'm mad that we couldn't do this earlier because if we did then I could still call you mine"

You couldn't help it, the last part just came out. It's as if you heart had taken the reigns.

"Y/N"

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that"

But little did you know that is what Alex had been wanting you to say. She had wanted a second chance since the two of you broke up but she never thought it would happen. You continue mumbling as if the more you say the better it will be but that isn't the case, you are digging yourself a deeper hole but Alex doesn't care. You had given her hope.

She felt the overwhelming desire to kiss you whether this was the right time or place, she didn't care.

You are half way through your fourth attempt at apologising when you feel Alex's hand cup your cheek. Your head leans to the side slightly as you melt into her touch. The look in her eyes is recognisable but you hadn't seen it in a long time and you had missed it. Before you have the chance to stand to her level Alex leans down and kisses you. You grab her hips pulling her onto your knee as your lips move in sync. It’s like no time had passed but the passion that follows proves otherwise.

"I know that a lot has changed but I still love you and I hate that I let my own insecurities ruin what we had. I know I don't deserve it but I want you back" Alex stays sitting on your knee whilst her fingers player with the loose hairs at the nape of your neck.

"I won't be a secret Alex" it was you one condition. It had been a big issue in your relationship before and if there is a second chance of happiness then everything has to be out in the open.

"I want the world to know about us"

From that day on there was no secrets between the two of you and you were honest with your relationship. Your families, friends and the fans supported the two of you and for the most part the age difference never got brought up much to Alex's shock.

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