#he'd cry and I'd cry and we'd be a mess | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

shootingstarwritings · 11 months

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"Hey bro, how does a crew battle work...?"

Hey, it's me again! The name's James. Last time we checked up like this, I hopped my roommate's body so he'd get better at fighting games. His name's Korrin, but he prefers Kor.

I gotta admit, these powers were a pretty sweet deal. He suddenly had a brand new genre to enjoy and I got to play with his body every once in a while. Seemed like a win-win, right?

Well, we got caught up talking just a bit too much shit during one of the weeklies. Think I ended up messing with my roommate's personality a bit too much while I was jerking off as him. He was far cockier than before I started taking over.

"Yeah, that's right. $500 crew battle," said Kor, flexing his muscles through the tight t-shirt I had mind-fucked him into preferring to wear. "Me and James could beat the shit outta everyone in this venue. Easy."

I wrapped an arm around his shoulder, saying, "Chill the hell out before you spend all our rent money," through clenched teeth. In response, he leaned over and gave me a deep kiss before talking more shit.

We didn't have to play everyone in the venue, but now we were stuck in a 4v4 crew battle; and Kor had successfully pissed off just about everyone who was a regular. We had two weeks to find two other guys to fill out our team or we'd be going hungry for the next month.

The ride home was quiet, although Kor didn’t seem to mind. He stared straight ahead, one hand on the steering wheel while another was on my thigh. Occasionally, he would squeeze while smiling at me. The way his eyes lit up whenever we were together dazzled me. I couldn’t stay mad at him, especially when it was my fault he was the way he was.

"Aww, don’tcha worry," said Kor as he massaged my shoulders, another trait I had bestowed him. My bed was a bit small for the two of us, and Kor had often wondered out loud if we could fit a queen sized bed in my room. “I’m sure we’ll find some guys. Even if they’re dead weight, you and me can wipe the floor with everyone there.” Before I could say anything, he leaned over and kiss my neck. I shivered, toes curling as he greedily licked one of my more sensitive spots.

After I let out a few… unbecoming moans, Kor pulled away and tittered. “Love making you cry out like that,” he said in a sensual tone. “Well, good night. Gotta get to the gym early tomorrow.”

As the door to his room shut close, I stared up at the ceiling and sighed. I had a few other friends that liked games, but they had no interested in fighting games like me. Of course, that had never stopped me before…

Two weeks should be enough time to make two pros, right?

The first guy on my list was Jason. He was a buddy of mine that I met in college. Smart, kind, and eager to show off the gains he'd made at the gym. "I spent three years to get this bod," he had bragged to me, showing off his toned and sweaty torso. Even so, he still enjoyed playing games, particularly RPGs. He was always throwing one my way or another--with tons of fan translations and cryptic guides as well.

I'd have to play one of them to completion one of these days to thank him for the service he was about to provide.

The night after Kor made his bet, I made my move. I locked my door and focused on flying. My body slowly lost its weight, density, and then mass in general. Skin peeled away and disappeared into dust, waiting for the chance to reform once my mission was complete. Organs twisted into neat little knots that blinked out of existence. My bones ground up against each other before vanishing.

It was only during those few precious moments that my soul was free. I sailed through the sky, unable to feel the wind on my face yet elated all the same. The moon was so close to my fingertips that it felt unfair that I couldn't grasp it. However, I knew exactly what I could grip instead.

I phased through Jason's apartment with little issue and found himself soon afterward. He was playing a battle simulator without a shirt on. "It's about a 73% to one-hit KO," he muttered to himself as he clicked through an innumerable amount of tabs. I knew for a fact some of them were months old and untouched for just as long.

Probably another habit I’d have to kick, but it was hard to focus on that when I kept focusing on that tight body he had. I would’ve licked my lips of I had any in that form. Not wanting to waste any more time, I hopped into him.

“Hnng…! Ahhh…hah…!” Jason let out a moan, tongue sticking out involuntarily as a shiver of pleasure ran all throughout his body. “Wh-what the fuck—is happening—“ Jason moaned as he turned around and began to hump his seat cushions. “AH! NRGH AAAAAHHHH!” Any words Jason would’ve tried to cry out were soon overpowered by panicked pants of pleasure. His hands, which would’ve normally reached for his phone to call for help, could only play with his chest and sensitive nipples.

My will overpowered his own, but Jason didn’t seem to mind. He kicked off his shoes, socked toes curling up in pleasure, and rubbed his trembling body all over the coach. “I-I…! K-Keep go—OOAHH—Keep going!” He said, panting and laughing the whole time. His back arched once more as he let out a strangled scream while his erect cock spewed semen all over his shorts. Jason, mind drowning in a hurricane of euphoria curtesy of me, collapsed covered in a sweaty, semen-covered mess.

Eventually, I opened my new eyes and felt my chiseled body. “Mmm, oh Jason. Let’s get your hand-eye coordination to my level.” As I began to strip so I could play in the nude, I saw angry DMs from Jason’s opponent.

Smirking, I walked over to the laptop and messaged him back. “Sorry bro, too busy playing games and fucking bussy to play with a pussy like you. GG you win, loser.”

I laughed as I got another stream of profanities from Jason’s old opponent, but I didn’t care. I was covered in sweat, smelling like a real man, while I was playing my favorite game.

Once Jason was done and truly mind-fucked, I had one more person I needed to visit.

#male possession #male body possession #ghost possession #spirit possession #astral projection possession

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queerstudiesnatural · 1 day

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i was in a full 2010s romcom in my dream last night lmao. i was in some sort of school and this boy started talking to me about the? idk i think it was swordfish figurines i had? i think they were supposed to be snails. anyway he said they were cool and i was cool and long story short i got a boyfriend. i was my middle school self btw and i couldn't believe someone actually liked me and i was vibing with this boy so much, he was sweet and funny. and then one day i was on the bus and the only seat left was next to my middle school bully and her pack of mean girls. so i sat there and tried to ignore them and i was texting my boyfriend and of course they all started reading over my shoulder. and then they all started laughing and i was like what. and they told me they had asked the guy to pretend to be interested in me to humiliate me. he never actually liked me, he was dared to talk to me and date me and how could i think anyone could actually like me etc. it was all them, they just hired this guy to mess with me for fun. so of course i was devastated and confronted my boyfriend when i got off the bus, and he admitted he'd started talking to me as a dare at first but he'd grown to genuinely like and even love me, and he begged me to forgive him etc. but of course i didn't. i told him never to talk to me again and i was soooo hurt like i remember crying so much in my dream because i genuinely liked and even loved him, and i'd trusted him. anyway he tried everything to get me to talk to him again, he'd send me cards and messages and try to get us into situations where we'd have to talk to each other like getting us partnered up for art class etc, but i always refused to engage. until one day sjonnie my beloved @castielsprostate was texting me and telling me about his day and how he was at a party for his friend ils who had just gotten his degree in like engineering or something. and sjonnie said oh btw your boy is here. and i was like my boy? and he said yeah your ex. he's here. and i was like tf is he doing there why is he in the netherlands hello?? and sjonnie was like idk apparently he has family here and he's been talking about how he hurt someone he cared about and he needed to get away and find himself or something. and idk i guess i was moved by that and i finally decided to drop my wall and reach out to the guy. so i answered his latest text, and he was so happy i was talking to him, and i asked him what he was doing in the netherlands and he said how do you know i'm there?? and i was like you're at a party with my friend. apparently you both know ils who's passed his engineer exam. and he was like omg ils brought us back together??? i'm gonna kiss him!! and yeah anyway we started talking again and i said i just wanted to be friends, i needed to get to know him and trust him again. so we did that but of course i still loved him, and we eventually ended up back together and lived happily ever after the end

#this is soooo something that middle school me would dream about lol #god these girls made my life hell #i can't believe they're still haunting my dreams 13 years later #rain.stuff #rain.dreams #<- new tag lol i think i should start saving those

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kuailiangshellfire · 10 months

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every road that i've been on.

When I was a boy, I was stung by a scorpion.

It lit on my blood on fire, turning me into a restless, drooling mess. Twitching in my bed before stiffening with a seizure. The doctors within the Lin Kuei had written me off, condemning me to death before my seventh birthday. Bi-Han had been indifferent the entire time, keeping his distance from me, like it had been a disease I contracted. We'd never been close, him and I, so it betrayed nothing when he stayed away. Tomas, from what I heard, was a wreck. He'd beg Father to let him see me, but he had insisted of keeping him away as well. To keep the thought of me alive and well in his mind, just in case I had perished. Father had been getting ready to bury his youngest son.

In the end, on the fifth day, I prevailed.

I awoke, covered in stale sweat and drool from the night before. Standing up, I walked out, scaring the doctors of the Lin Kuei. It had been different after that.

Despite recovering from the rest of my symptoms, the fire in my blood never receded.

It scared me. I had dreamed of taking up the mantle Sub-Zero after our father, perhaps before Bi-Han, as much as that had been a pipe dream. It was dashed after scorpion sting. Holding out my palms, the fire manifested itself. Bright and warm. I gasped, trying to hold in the tears. I sobbed once, and it was all over. It spread up my arms, and my panic caused me to flail about, trying to put it out. It did nothing but spread it to the walls of my quarters.

The room was engulfed quickly. Thick, black smoke filled the room, my lungs, causing me to cough. The tears I struggled to keep inside left me blind as they poured down my cheeks. I fell to the floor, coughing. I was barely aware of Tomas wrapping his arms around me. Immune to my flames and the smoke, he dragged me outside. I gasped and coughed and clung to him like a lifeline. Sobs began to wrack my body. I almost wanted to push him away, as if I'd burn him if I held on too long. Tomas said nothing. Just held me close.

Half of the Lin Kuei's quarters had to be rebuilt. I kept my head down as Father surveyed the damage. He frowned, displeased at the wreckage. I suppressed a wince. I bit the inside of my cheek, as to keep from crying again. He sighed, and I dug my nails into my palms. Glancing up at him, I was stunned to find that there had been no anger as he looked at me. He looked almost amused. I opened my mouth to ask why, but he turned from me and the question died in my throat.

My survival and the fire earned me the name Scorpion.

Father smiled as he gave me the moniker. The yellow mask feeling heavy as he handed it to me. I swallowed. It tasted like ash on my tongue.

When I placed the it onto my face, I felt like an impostor. A traitor to the Lin Kuei. A clan of cryomancers and I had fire in my veins. I had hoped I'd been a late bloomer. That the ice would manifest itself as it had done for my father and brother. As I watched the fire dance in my palms, I willed it to turn cold. It did not.

Years passed. My dream of being Sub-Zero melted away as ice does around fire. I fought with feelings of jealousy and inadequacy as Bi-Han placed Father's mask onto his face. Tomas squeezed my wrist before joining his side. After a moment, I followed, forcing the feelings back down into the box I kept them in.

The feeling of being an impostor didn't fade. It had only grown. Even as I wore the yellow mask, and the yellow garb my father had made for me, my world felt tilted. I would look in the mirror and see someone else. A stranger, but so familiar. A man I knew like the back of my own hand, but as soon as I'd try and recall his face or name, it would be gone. Touching the mirror, tracing the mask's reflection with a finger. It was on the tip of my tongue, who this person was. I knew him. I knew him.

Tomas started teasing me about it, as he became my confidant. I couldn't tell Bi-Han, so focused on helping the Grandmaster lead the Lin Kuei into greatness. His eyes blatanly focused on the title of Grandmaster. To him, anything else was a distraction, one that we couldn't afford. Still, the thoughts that troubled me were getting increasing harder to ignore. A longing ache in my chest had settled in, becoming almost unbearable as I thought about the unknown man. I was no longer comfortable in my skin and there was something in me calling to seek him out. Find this mysterious stranger that bore the mask on my face.

I just didn't expect to find him as soon as I did.

The Grandmaster had gotten reports from our scouts of enemy activity in one of our outlying villages. One that neither Tomas or I had heard of. Accused to harboring enemies, and them using the village as a base of operations, Tomas and I were the first ones tasked with spying on them over the next few days, with relief coming then. Tomas jokingly complained the entire time we traveled there.

It had been a farming village. A simple life compared to ours. Everyone pitching in, almost like they had been a family. Watching them filled my chest with an unfamiliar longing. Touching my chest, I had no idea where it came from. Tomas looked at me with an odd expression.

“You alright?” He asked.

My tongue felt heavy with the answer. It felt like a lie. Maybe it was. “Yeah, I'm fine.”

Another few days passed and nothing changed. No enemies. No secret armies. Nothing. I began to question why we were here in the first place. I huffed, rubbing my eyes as Smoke shifted next to me. The sun was high overhead, bearing down on us in our makeshift camp. Familiar footsteps behind us were welcoming, asour relief. Back to base for rest, a wash and a decent meal. I was ready to leave this village behind and whatever uncomfortable longing it was bringing me.

“I'm so glad to see familiar faces,” Tomas chuckled.

I shot him a glare. “You tired of seeing my face every day?”

Smoke's eyes crinkled with a smile. “Something like that.”

Bi-Han shook his head at the two of us. “Find anything interesting?”

Smoke stood, stretching. “Not a thing. They're farmers. Seemed to be getting ready for their harvest.”

Bi-Han hummed, low and thoughtful. “Doesn't prove their innocence. The Grandmaster has instructed us to observe for another week. If we observe nothing, we move on. If not, we...”

As I stood, Bi-Han's voice fell away as my eyes landed on a villager. He was a bit older than myself. He held himself differently than the other villagers, almost like he had once been a fighter. At rest, but there was a tension in his shoulders, almost like he was ready for an attack at any point. Trailing after him, a young boy with a small stuffed animal tucked under his arm. The boy was his clone – his son – and warmth filled my chest.

He stopped, picking the boy up and putting him on his shoulders. As they passed down the street, people were greeting him, smiling, waving. Whoever he was, he was well known. Watching them, the warmth spread through me and I found my eyes getting wet. The urge to sob for joy, for happiness was getting overwhelming and I blinked hard and fast to clear my eyes. I bit back the sob that was caught in my throat, but I know I had made a sound, because Smoke's eyes were on me instantly.

He made his way to the town square and familiarity washed over me. A tear escaped down my cheek. Smoke moved closer to me. Watching them, I suddenly couldn't breath, like the mask that was never mine to begin with began to suffocate me. I tore it off and with clarity, I knew. I knew what I had to do.

“Kuai?” My heart was beating so loud in my ears that I almost didn't hear him. My feet started moving. Slowly at first, but quickly picking up speed down the hill towards the village. I heard Tomas calling after me, while Bi-Han roared at me to stop. I didn't care.

I ran into the village at top speed. The man had stopped, placing the boy gently onto the ground. He said something, giving him a smile before his eyes met mine. In them, there was no confusion, no hostility towards the man running at him. Only familiarity and warmth greeted me.

I barreled into him, causing both of us to whirl around as he wrapped his arms around me. I squeezed him tight, burying my face into his neck and inhaling. The scent of pine and freshly fallen snow hit my senses and I gripped him tighter. His nose buried into my hair as we just stood there for a moment. Eons passed and everything was clicking back into place. The man I saw in the mirror, the man I ached for, was here. The clarity that eluded me for as long as I carried the name Scorpion was now a welcomed friend as I gazed at the man who I knew like the back of my own hand. My thumb brushed against his cheekbone. He leaned into the touch, before grasping my hand with one of his own. The coolness of it seeped into my skin.

“You have my ice,” I whispered, “Hanzo.”

“And you have my fire,” He returned, “Liang.”

He brought his other hand down, wrapping it around the forgotten mask. Bringing it up into the light, he smiled. “Scorpion.”

My face heated with a blush. He dropped the mask before catching my eyes. The fire in his eyes ignited my own.

Our gaze never broke as our lips met.

(updated 7/30/23, also x-posted on ao3)

#subscorp #kuai liang #hanzo hasashi #mortal kombat #mk 2023 #mortal kombat 1 #scorpion #sub zero #smoke #tomas vrbada #small spoilers for mk 2023 #also based on some personal theories

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pierrot-bly · 1 year

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Ranking Obey Me Characters By How Down Bad I Am For Them

Pairings: N/A

Characters: Lucifer, Mammon, Leviathan, Satan, Asmodeus, Beelzebub, Belphegor, Diavolo, Barbatos, Simeon, Solomon

Genre: Crack

Warnings: Horny Brainrot

1. Satan

I love this cat boy almost as much as I love Obey Me. He is a snarky, angry blond and I'm here for it. Please sir slap me and spit in my mouth ilysm istg

2. Diavolo

A sweet himbo who has canonically told MC he wants to kidnap them and keep them locked up forever? Sign me up. Sir, I will willingly stay forever, just ask smh. Please bend me in half and blow my back out until I have your babies jk jk unless...

3. Beelzebub

Another sweet himbo who could snap me in half. He loves food, I love food, we have so much in common. I got something else he can eat wink wink

4. Mammon

Another himbo, but plot twist, I wanna snap him in half. I just wanna make him feel so good he cries, I'll give him the world. He's bad with money, I'm bad with money, we have so much in common wow

5. Belphegor

Besides being a tiny murder muffin, I wanna make him ride me and cry from exhaustion. Lovingly bullying him, ya know? He's cute but I'm a little hung up on the murder still smh

6. Solomon

Shady magic man? Sign me up. I bet he fucks while experimenting with magic on you. As long as he doesn't offer to cook afterwards, I can rock his world

7. Leviathan

Finally a bottom I can be more confident than. Literally we'd both be a mess just holding hands so unless we have hand sex 👉👌 I don't think we'd do anything

8. Barbatos

Scary but kinda in a sexy way. He's way too good for me. I'd be honored if he was down but he's like perfect so I'd just be insecure the whole time

9. Asmodeus

Personally I'm just platonically into him. I would bestie fuck just once with him tho

10. Simeon

I love corrupting religious boys as much as the next but not him. Again just platonic feels for him and I couldn't see myself doing that with him

11. Lucifer

He'd make me cry and probably have a breakdown. Also Satan supremacy, sorry old man

#obey me #obey me fanfic #obey me satan #obey me x male mc #obey me x male reader #obey me luficer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me diavolo #obey me simeon #obey me solomon #obey me simp

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yanderes-galore · 2 years

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May I request a TMNT 2012!Raph with the reader's actual boyfriend (still dating before Raph took her) helping her make an escape attempt? Like they surprisingly get far enough to go up to the surface and hot wire a car but completely forgot about the Shellraiser so it kinda turns into a high speed chase in the middle of the night. When the chase is over, they're in deep shit. Especially the boyfriend. But if you can't do it because of the other requests before mine, it's alright ^^ Please take care, sweetheart! <3

He's the most aggressive of the turtles too 😰 Aged up, as usual!

Highway To Hell

Yandere! 2012! Raphael Short

Pairing: Romantic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Kidnapping, Forced relationship, Breaking and entering, Implied murder, Jealousy, Possessive behavior.

"Go faster!" You cry to your boyfriend, looking out the back window. The large vehicle barrels towards you both at an insane speed. You needed to be careful.

"I'm going as fast as I can!"

How you got into this mess was a long story. A story showing how jealousy can ruin lives. How your life was stolen away by just one mutant.

Before you and your boyfriend got together, you were friends with a mutant turtle named Raphael. You had been saved by him and his brothers and managed to stay in contact. From what you knew of, you were close friends.

You visited often, heading into the lair to hang out with the mutants and their other two human friends, April and Casey.

Over time you then heard rumors amongst the brothers that Raphael had feelings for you. You could not reciprocate due to your own feelings but you found it cute. You never expected someone like him to be head over heels for someone.

You never fully accepted Raphael's advances. You just... weren't into him. Especially when your now boyfriend confessed to you.

Dating your boyfriend felt like heaven to you. While for Raphael, it felt like hell. He was heartbroken and enraged.

You thought Raphael could take the rejection well with help from his brothers and master. Sure, he'd be moody but you knew his heart and mind would be in the right place.

You were quickly proven wrong late at night with your window shattering.

"Just who does he think he is, huh!? Taking you away from me when clearly we'd be the better pair!"

His rage scared you. The mutant was strong and had lost it. You couldn't even talk him out of it when he pushed you against a wall so hard you blacked out.

When you woke up you were in a dark room. Restraints held you still, you only felt one presence in the room...

"Good to know you're awake. Now, let's talk about last night, alright?"

Your life was hell after that.

Silently, every night, you pleaded your boyfriend would help you. Raphael was delusional to the point of forcing you to love him. No one was happy in this situation....

You could only endure the forced affection and belittling for so long. He loved you yet hated you. You both had betrayed each other, that's why you were in the situation you were in.

Soon, you managed to find a beacon of hope. Just before your mind left you, you saw him.

Your savior... your angel... your boyfriend.

The one you truly loved.

"I've been looking everywhere for you... come on."

It didn't matter what you two had to do to escape. You were up for anything. Theft, violence, it didn't matter as you felt you endured worse.

Now here you were, in a stolen and hotwired car, fleeing for your life. Your boyfriend drove quickly through the dimly lit roads of New York. Trying his best to outrun the Shellraiser....

There was no doubt Raphael was in there.

"If we slow down even a little bit we may be crushed-"

A hook from the hulking vehicle behind you then shoots into the car. You scream as the shellraiser stops, pulling in your car slowly. Both you and your boyfriend panic before opening the doors and exiting.

"Let's go-"

"I knew I'd find you...."

You turn, fear on your face when you saw a furious Raph glaring at both of you. This was it, he could easily outrun you if you ran. You were caught... again.

"Now, (Y/N), get in the Shellraiser while I take care of HIM."

He gestures to your boyfriend.

"No...!"

"Then you'd like to watch?"

Raphael grins, eyes unhinged when he pulls out his sais. You know he was taught never to kill people... but with that look in his eyes-

You already knew what would happen next.

"Stay still and maybe I'll go easy on you...."

#yandere tmnt #yandere teenage mutant ninja turtles #yandere 2012 raphael #yandere tmnt 2012 #yandere raphael

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fezwearingjellybananas · 5 months

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❝ ... i guess i'm just scared of losing you. ❞ + Barry & Nora West-Allen?

Nora had never seen her dad so angry. He had never been the sort of person who got angry, not with them, but she'd said about time travel and he'd just-

He'd time travelled. She knew that. She'd grown up hearing stories about superheroes and time travel and aliens and magic. Uncle Jax used to live on a time machine.

But she'd done one little bit of time travel and her dad had been furious. She hadn't even meant to do it.

He'd been acting weird ever since she told him her name. And when Nora had told him that, he'd stopped yelling, and he hadn't tried to follow her when she'd stormed off to her room.

Well, if he didn't want her now, she'd go be Uncle Wally's sidekick instead.

A knock came from the door she'd slammed shut.

"Nora?" Dad asked softly. "Can I come in?"

Nora huffed and ignored him. He'd only yell at her again.

She heard him sit down. That didn't matter, she'd just run out the window, he knew that.

"I messed up," he said. "And I'm very sorry. I'd like to talk to you about something, when you're ready."

She scowled at the door. He sounded sorry, but why should she believe him.

Uncle Wally would probably call him if Nora showed up anyway.

She opened the door with a scowl and looked down at him. He looked like he'd been crying.

"Go away," she said.

"Sweetheart-"

"You don't want me any more. I don't care, I don't want you either."

"Sweetheart, no," he said. "That's not-"

"You want me to go back to being-"

"No," he said firmly, suddenly on his feet and hugging her tight. "My beautiful girl, I want you to be exactly who you are, and I love you so much. I'm so sorry I made you feel like I didn't. I shouldn't have yelled, Nora, I'm so sorry. I..."

He trailed off and Nora stepped away from him.

"I'm going to go stay with Uncle Wally," she said.

"Okay," he sighed. "Okay. You're fifteen. I should have-" He covered his face with his hands for a moment and took a breath. "Nora, do you remember when you came home asking about a man I fought called Cicada and I said I would tell you when you were older?"

"I thought he was dead," Nora said. "Did you kill him?"

"No," her dad said. "No, we'll talk about that another day-"

"You killed people?" Nora almost yelled.

"Not- I didn't ever plan on- Nora, I still feel very guilty and they happened a long time ago," he said. "No, Cicada, he- He wanted to kill other metahumans. He almost succeeded in killing Uncle Cisco. He- I'll tell you the whole story when your mother gets home but I didn't fight Cicada alone. I had help."

"From Team Flash."

"From my daughter from the future."

"Me?" Nora asked.

"Not exactly," he said. "She was from the timeline where I died in the Crisis."

"But that was before I was born."

"When I first saw the newspaper it was meant to be April 2024. It changed when she time travelled. She didn't mean to. She came back because she wanted to save me and a man promised he could help her do that. Only the man she trusted was Eobard Thawne and he tricked her and time changed too much. Your mother and I- She faded away in our arms. And then we were told the Crisis had moved and we thought all we ever going to be able to do was lose a child we'd never had the chance to have a life with."

He wiped a tear from his eye.

"Should I pick another name?" Nora asked quietly. "One that isn't hers?"

"It's your name," he said. "You get to choose it, and I know my mother would have loved you, and choosing her name means so much, I promise. And you know about Oliver and the other Barry. You know my friends saved me, that they gave me this chance to have a life, to have you. And, a couple of years later, I met my two children from the future and the oldest was a daughter named Nora."

"Did you know the whole time?" she asked.

"No," he said. "I just thought I'd lost you again, Nora, but here you are, right in front of me."

He held out his hands and Nora looked at them.

"My beautiful girl," he said. "From the moment I first held you, I have been so unbelievably happy to be your dad, and I would not trade a single moment of it for anything. Even if you turn out to be someone else entirely, if everything changes, I will always love you for who you are, not because of the versions of maybe you I met a long time ago. I love you, Nora. I just... You told us your name and then you said you time travelled and I got scared I might lose you again. I can't do that. I know shouting at you was wrong and if you're still angry with me and you still want to go to Wally, I understand, but I am so, so sorry, sweetheart, and I promise I have always wanted you and I always will."

Nora threw her arms around him and he held her close.

"I love you so much," he said.

"I won't time travel again," Nora said.

"I'm not going to make you promise that," he said. "The first time I time travelled it was an accident. I'm going to show you how to control it, to somewhen I know we can do it safely, and then it's up to you. But maybe wait until you're a little older before you go running through time?"

"I'll try, Dad," she said. "We can really go time travelling? Now?"

"After your mother gets home and we've told her everything and you everything about Cicada," he said. "I love you, Nora."

"I love you too, Dad."

[Prompts]

#longer than i thought it would be #thank you!#replies #shrinkthisviolet #dc tv universe #dc #nora west allen #barry allen #look i wrote a thing #*

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mixelation · 1 year

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deidada and tsunade in honor of that one fic of yours

send me two characters

Who would win in a fight?

I'll give this one to Tsunade. Deidara's range and sheer destructive abilities are kind of OP so there's probably some scenario where he could win, but Tsunade can recover from massive damage and can also dish out just as much sheer destructive force. Plus she has more experience and if Sasuek can bullshit his way out of "microscopic explosive dust rips you apart from the inside" then the world's best medic definitely also can.

Who would be a better roommate?

Oof, I'd live with Hokage!Tsunade over Deidara, but Deidara over pre-Naruto'd!Tsunade. Deidara is likely a messy roommate who doesn't give a shit if he breaks something accidentally (or on purpose), but I don't think I personally do many things he'd complain about so we'd probably largely get along? But Tsunade also doesn't strike me as someone who gives a hit about what her roommate is doing as long as it doesn't interfere with what she wants to do, so a vaguely organized Hokage!Tsunade would be a fine roommate whose most annoying habit would be mooching my booze. But she's also a huge mess pre-Naruto and I don't want to have to deal with that.

Who’s better in bed?

Unclear. Tsunade has more practice but Deidara has extra mouths.

Who I’d pick to be my presidential running mate?

Tsunade. She's already ninja president, so.....

Whose shoulder I’d cry on?

I think both would just push you off LMAO

Who would make a better parent?

Tsunade successfully raised Shizune but she was such a mess I'm not convinced it wasn't Shizune raising herself. At the same time Deidara is a walking disaster, so..... idk, I think Deidara would probably be okay at interacting with kids in short bursts but maybe doesn't have the discipline to be a good parent by himself. Tsunade is probably better at making sure a kid has material possessions and is eating right and going to school but might emotionally check out for long stretches. So I will.... pick Tsunade but know the bar wasn't very high.

Who I’d rather date?

(steeples fingers) I like them both as characters and I don't think either have personalities that would instantly drive me insane. So.... either? LOL

#ask meme answer

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levitiquee · 11 months

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Letting go (Eren x female reader)

(I'm afraid it's a little cliche, it seemed much better in my head. Or maybe I just suck at writing. Oh well. I'm not really into Eren that much, but here's a random something.)

Eren's room was empty.

I knew so, I wasn't expecting anything else.

And yet, my heart hurt.

Eren escaped his cell today. Nobody knows where he is now, except the supposed yeagerists. The moment I heard the news, I bolted out of the room, all the way to the residential quarters and now here I am.

I knew all too well he wouldn't be here but doesn't mean it hurts any less.

I know I shouldn't have left. It was an important meeting. I don't know why I did it. All I knew was that it was too much.

Talking about holding a search party to round up Eren like he's some low life criminal?

All too much

I knew I had to get away from that suffocating room and so I did. Without thinking, without even processing, I found myself here.

My safe space.

I stepped inside the dim, lifeless room. It was clear no one has been in here for months. The desk was dusty, the ceilings with webs. The bed was untouched, the sheets smooth, showing no signs that anyone has laid here recently. The only sound was my soft breathing and the tics of the clock hung on the wall, almost echoing in the silence. The sunlight barely came through the heavy curtains along the window, causing an odd contrast with the darkness of the room.

It felt omnious. Unfamiliar. Like I shouldn't be here.

It's not like I have never been here. Because I have. Way more than anyone else probably ever had. We'd spent many hours together, in this very room. Sometimes as friends, sometimes as more than friends.

The room wasn't so unfriendly then.

There were nights when I couldn't sleep. Those were the nights I'd always find myself back here, in front of this door.

I'd never even had to make a sound, he always seemed to somehow sense I was there. Before I even raised my hand to knock, I'd find it open, with him standing before me. He'd step aside, silently gesturing me to come in.

("How did you even know I was here?" I'd ask.

"You're too damn loud" he'd grunt.)

I knew. He couldn't sleep either. The same memories that kept me awake at night, kept him up as well. So, I always ended up here, to the one person who'd always understand.

Some nights, I'd fall against his shoulders and cry my heart out, desperately clinging to him like I'm drowning and he's my anchor, the only thing that's keeping me afloat. He'd hold me against him, smoothing my hair, his chin resting on top of my head, just letting me fall apart. "I got you," he'd whisper sometimes, repeating it over and over until I calmed down. Because I knew. I knew he's got me. No matter what.

Some nights, we'd just lay together silently, without saying a word. Eyes locked, legs tangled, fingers entertwined. Finding peace in each other's soft inhales and exhales, until we fell asleep.

Some nights, we'd lean against the wall on his bed, soft whispers and hushed laughers filling the room. Sharing secrets and silly little gossips. We'd be so sleep-deprived and tired, to the point out head would be fuzzy and we'd just laugh about anything and everything.

( "Captain Levi should really check out his gut health, bro always looks constipated."

"Shut the fuck up," he'd let out a snort. "You should go and tell him that. You'll be the one getting constipation then.)

Some nights, we'd be a little bolder. One of us would lean their face too close and the other would reach in. Soft, light kisses until it turns to barely audible moans and breathy gasps, along with the creaks of the bed.

In the morning, we'd wake up and pretend like nothing happened. We'd go to the mess hall to eat breakfast separately, greeting each other good mornings. Sitting with our friends and having friendly little squabbles and leg-pulling.

No one knew about us.

I don't know why we hid it, but we just did.

It felt better this way.

Our little secret.

Until, it all went wrong.

I realized it. More before than anyone

I knew him too damn well to not notice the empty eyes and the tired smiles. How he started isolating himself, always stuck in his own head. Barely ever talking to anyone.

Barely ever talking to me.

I still spent nights in his room, because the loneliness sometimes got too much. Except it wasn't the same anymore. He'd let me lay beside him, but never faced me.

He wouldn't even look me in the eye.

And in the morning, he'd be gone. I'd wake up in a cold and empty bed. I'd barely ever see him on the breakfast table either. He'd eat silently and be the first to leave.

All the signs. And I chose to ignore it all.

Never even bothering to ask him if he was okay.

When he first disappeared, I was scared out of my mind. The others had to quite literally drag me out of Marley, because I refused to leave without him.

And then the letters started coming. Each leaving me more confused than the other.

Burning questions were on my mind.

Where were you?

What were you planning to do?

Until we received the final letter and that's when I realized, I couldn't keep lying to myself.

Not after this.

As I watched him destroy the city, killing hundreds of people, my heart tore.

Innocent people.

Children even.

Children like we were when Wall Maria fell.

I looked at his empty expression and realized.

He wasn't Eren anymore.

He was someone else.

Someone I didn't know.

So much has happened since then. So much pain in me, but I didn't have anyone to fall apart to me anymore.

It made me wonder if you needed someone to fall apart to.

It broke my heart that I couldn't be that person to you.

Now here I was, back here again, looking for a sanctuary. Somewhere to hide from the cruel reality outside the door. The room seemed to be glaring at me, threatening me to get out. It took me every bit of effort I had to plant my feet to the ground because all I wanted to do was turn around and run away. Because where do I go from here?

Where are you, Eren?

"I thought you might be in here."

My eyes widened.

I know that voice.

I swallowed as I turned around and saw the last face I had thought I'd see today.

"Eren."

My voice cracked.

He was there. Standing on the doorstep.

His emerald green eyes glinting in the sunlight. He half-turned, closing the door, not before I saw the two soldiers guarding outside.

There was only us in the room now, face to face. I gazed at him, frozen in place, scared to even move.

He didn't feel real.

Like he'd disappear if I even blinked.

I took him in, every bit of him. My eyes wide, my mind sending me warning signs, my heart wanting nothing more than just to touch him, just to confirm that he was actually here in front of me.

I haven't seen you for so long, Eren.

He was leaning against the door, hands in his pocket, his expression empty of any emotions. He had his hair up, but I could tell his hair got longer. A few stray strands were on his face, reaching his eyes.

His eyes.

Dark shadows clung under them, sunk deep in his face. The beautiful green flashed through his lashes.

He looked tired.

So tired.

Why do you look so tired, Eren?

I could only stare, my brain lost all capability of thinking rationally. I wondered if it'd be okay if I took a step forward. I wondered if he'd mind if I touched his face and ran my hands through his soft dark hair and pulled him down and kissed him. I wondered if I was dreaming.

My knees were weak, my head dizzy. I took a step backwards, trying to stabilize myself.

"Eren"

I repeated his name, my voice barely audible. The sound felt unfamiliar as it echoed in the silence.

He gave no sign that he heard me. Just stared, unblinking.

What happened to you, Eren?

"Where have you been, Eren?" I whispered. My lips were chapped and my throat dry. My heart banged on my chest desperately, trying to find an escape from this small, suffocating room. My lungs screaming at me to take in some air cause I can't remember how long I've been holding my breath for.

Why are you looking at me like that, Eren?

I took a sharp breath, my lungs contracting. The clock ticked off somewhere in the room, I can't really remember. It was vibrating through my blood, syncing with my heartbeat. I wanted to scream now.

Stop looking at me like that, Eren.

"Why are you here, Eren?" I asked him.

No response.

I wondered if the figure before me was just a figment of my imagination.

I needed answers.

He wasn't giving them to me.

I was going to lose my mind.

Why won't you speak, Eren?

"Speak, Eren," I begged him, "Please."

Give me answers, God damnit.

"Speak!" I finally yelled out, losing my patience. The words rang across the silent room. I felt the heat pricking behind my eyes.

"Explain this to me. Talk to me. Tell me what the fuck has been going on!"

Give me a reason.

Give me anything.

Don't just stare at me like that.

Not a hint of emotions in those eyes. I wondered if this was his idea of tormenting me.

"I missed you," I whispered, my lips barely moving. The room seemed to be choking me now. Squeezing my eyes shut, I tried to get the tears back to where they came from. It hurt.

As his eyes met with mine once more, I realized with a tug of my heartstrings.

There's no point talking to him.

He isn't Eren.

Not anymore.

Eren's eyes were never this empty.

Where's the spark in your eyes, Eren?

My chest heaved with unexplainable emotions, but my mind settled down. I was tired. I can't keep screaming at him anymore. It hurt too much.

I can't make him talk, not if he doesn't want to talk to me.

"What are you going to do, Eren?" I asked, tiredly. I wasn't even expecting an answer anymore at this point. I just don't know what else to do. I didn't have the energy to yell at him and as much as I wanted to smack him in the face, I didn't even have the energy to do that either.

He took a step towards me finally, walking towards me. Closer. Come closer. I wanted to beg him. I need to know you're real. He came closer, he was inches away now.

What do you want from me, Eren?

A hand touched the side of my face, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear.

Eren's hands, I realized. Rough, calloused hands.

I teared up.

Why?

What was wrong with him?

Why was I scared?

This isn't Eren. It can't be.

I couldn't possibly ever be scared of Eren.

His other hand reached to cup the other side of my face, pulling my chin up.

His green eyes seemed to be burning mine.

"Talk to me, Eren," I said, broken words barely coming out of my lips. I reached my hand up, tracing my thumb along his jaw, moving the hair from his eyes. His expression tightened.

The first reaction I got out of him.

I leaned in to him, his breath now caressing my face.

"Talk to me,"

A small gasp escaped his lips, his eyes widening. Cupping the back of my head with both of his hands, he pulled me up to him, closing the gap as he kissed me.

Just there.

Lips barely touching.

My heart may have stopped.

Are you real, Eren?

I grabbed his hair, pulling him closer to me, inhaling him in me, deepening the kiss. My lips telling him all that I was too scared to say out loud.

Stay.

Stay with me.

Don't fade away.

I felt his small intakes of breath against my lips, as one of his hands slid down my back, the other wrapping around my shoulders. Slowly, almost cradling me, he lowered me onto the bed beneathe him until I was fully on my back. He was on top of me, hands and knees caging me in. Raising my head, I pulled on his neck, trying to pull his head down. To close the space. To feel his lips on mine again. To take him in.

Stay with me.

In this room.

Forever.

The world could go to hell.

My brain was empty. I couldn't think straight. A part of me was listing all the reasons why i shouldn't be under him right now. That part of me was drowned out by the part of me who wanted nothing but to taste him again.

I shouldn't be doing this.

But I want to.

His hands ran up my arms, pulling them up and pinning them up on the headboard. And he was kissing me again, his free hand grabbing my jaw firmly as his lips moved, just in perfect sync with my own.

But this was wrong.

Something was wrong.

He felt wrong.

Everything was wrong.

The cold of something metal grazed my wrist.

Realization hit me. My eyes flew open and I pulled my face away. Yanking down my hands, trying to escape his grasp.

Too late.

It was too late.

The metal chains clinked as I looked up to see both my hands handcuffed and chained to the headboard.

When did he even pull them out? I thought as my mind panicked, struggling to free my hands. I felt a sharp pain through my wrist as the metal loop dug into my skin.

"I'd stay still if I were you," he finally spoke , his lips barely moving. "you might get hurt."

I whipped my head to look down, he was staring at me with the same expressionless face. Angry tears rolled down my cheek.

This is what he came here for?

"Are you fucking kidding me?" I yelled under my breath. "What the fuck, Eren? What the hell is this supposed to mean?"

He sighed. Leaning in closer, resting his forehead on mine, eyes closed. His nose touching mine. His hands barely skimming down my sides.

"I'm sorry," he said. "I had to come see you. One last time."

My heart pounded against my chest erratically.

What do you mean, Eren?

"I need you to stay here," he said quietly, "I need you to stay alive."

He opened his eyes, his lashes almost touching mine.

"Once I step out of this room, it's gonna be pure chaos. They'll be too busy trying to deal with me, no one would realize you're missing. And even if they do," he paused. "Who would think to search here?"

No.

He was going to keep me chained here while he went off and did something terrible.

"What are you going to do, Eren?" I said, fear replacing the anger in my voice now.

His lashes fluttered.

"I'm going to cause the rumbling," His tired eyes. Empty. "I will ruin the world."

A silence settled. My eyes wide with disbelief as they met his heavy half-lidded ones.

He's serious.

My heart panged.

No.

The air in the room disappears as I struggle to breathe. I couldn't believe what I just heard.

No.

"No," I said, shaking my head.

I looked down.

Shaking my head.

"No, you wouldn't," I repeated again, blankly.

I'm sleep-deprived and I'm imagining things.

"I have to protect the island. If I don't kill them, they're going to kill us,"

I shook my head again.

Please shut up, Eren.

Maybe if I pretended I didn't hear his words just now, it'd all go away.

I closed my eyes, shaking my head again.

He dragged his thumb over my lips, shushing me from repeating the words again.

"I don't have enough time," his voice strained. Finally showing emotions. His eyes wide with urgency. "Listen to me."

"No," I shook my head, getting angry now. Yet again, struggling fruitlessly against the restraints. "No, let me go Eren." I hissed as my wrists stinged. "Let me go damn it, I'm begging you."

"I can't" he breathed. "You're going to get in my way otherwise,"

I tilted my head, my eyes narrowing. "Yeah, no shit" I snarled. "What? Did you think I was just going to clap my hands and cheer on you, 'Jeez Eren, good job, let's burn the world together'? I won't let you do this!"

"I know. That's why you're tied up right now."

Rage rushed through my blood.

"What the hell are you thinking, Eren? Have you lost your damn mind?" I gaped at him. " What, is this your idea of peace? You can't fight fire with fire, that's not how it works! Killing everyone wouldn't solve shit. Can you just stop and calm down and think about what the hell you're doing? What you've been doing these past months? What you have done already?" I yelled, my face heating up. I wanted to cry because of how helpless I felt. I was falling apart now, on the edge of losing the little sanity I had left in me.

He stayed silent.

"Why?" My voice cracked. "Tell me why. You have to tell me why. You need to tell me why you're doing this. Why is this the only way? Why can't you just shut up and think this out through for one damn second?"

Talk to me, Eren. Tell me what's wrong. I can help you.

"You will be killing eldians too! Children who doesn't know shit about the world! How can you possibly think this is justified?" I cried out, his figure blurring because of the tears in my eyes.

He won't give me an answer.

Why won't you answer me, Eren?

"Tying me down is your solution? You think the others wouldn't fight back? You think they wouldn't try and stop you from commiting fucking genocide?"

"I know," His voice was so cold. "I know. All of you are a bunch of insane, righteous, stubborn fucks."

He paused.

"They'll try to stop me," he closed his eyes and ran his hand through his hair, his face twisted.

"And they'll probably die in the damn process."

I felt a shiver down my spine.

"What?"

"This has to be the way it goes. But I can't risk you. You have to be alive, no matter what,"

I couldn't believe his words.

"So it's okay if Mikasa and Armin die?"

I didn't understand. I didn't understand shit.

I don't understand what your saying Eren.

"No," he shook his head. "No. But they're my gamble. I need them for this. They're strong and skilled, they might survive. But you? I can't gamble you, I can't risk you. I can't have your blood on my hands too."

You aren't making any sense, Eren.

He slowly moved himself, standing up from the bed.

I was having a full-blown panic attack now. The chains were the only thing holding me back from dragging him back.

"Eren, Listen to me! We can still talk about this, figure out another way! It doesn't have to be like this! At this point, all of you are going to die!" I was desperate. I can't let him leave. I can't have this on my consciousness.

Don't do this Eren.

Won't you listen to me?

He pinched his brows together. Slowly shaking his head, he responded, "There's no other way," he looked to me.

"Hate me, I don't care. As long as you're fucking breathing and unharmed, hate me all you want."

He said as he walked away, looking away. Leaving me there.

He took a step towards the door.

Closer.

I lost this battle, I realized. I can't stop him.

He was reaching for the doorknob now.

Don't go, Eren.

He's going to leave.

Stay with me.

I don't have the power to stop him. He won't listen to me.

He's going to go out and unleash chaos.

And I'm going to be stuck here, helpless.

Will I ever see you again, Eren?

I opened my mouth, tears rolling down my cheek. This is my last chance.

"I love you,"

A broken sob racked my chest almost drowning out the words. "I'm sorry I never got to tell you. But I need you to know this, before you go."

My eyes locked onto his, as he froze. His lips parted.

There was a spark in his eyes.

What a beautiful shade of green.

Don't go Eren.

This wasn't how it was supposed to end.

Don't go.

He opened the door and stepped outside, leaving me alone in the room. I heard a click as the door locked.

"I'm sorry," I whispered.

"I can't save you."

I gasped for air as I broke down. Mikasa and Armin's face flashing through my mind. Jean, Connie, all of them.

I remembered holding Sasha's limp body to my chest as she bled out on me. I remembered the thousand other comrades and friends I had to bury. I remembered Shiganshina.

Are you all going to die today?

I remembered 11 year old Eren telling me he was going to kill all the titans.

No.

We went through so much, survived through so much. All for us to end this way.

Am I going to lose all of you?

I can't save you, Eren.

I can't save you.

#aot #aot fandom #aot fanfiction #aot x reader #aot x female reader #eren yeager #eren jaeger #eren x y/n #eren x you #eren x fem!reader #eren aot #snk #snk fanfiction #Spotify

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laf-outloud · 1 year

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The thing about that party is how incongruous it all was.

If a year or two after spn had ended, we saw a post wherein Jared and Jensen had been in town together for something like a convention and had gone out for a drink and it happened to be Dean's birthday, and they posted a pic saying they were toasting to Dean on his birthday or even 'We're having a party for him on his birthday, lol', we'd all have laughed and thought it was cute.

Because that's the kind of thing you do when you played a character for over a decade. And it would make sense. Even if he'd been out with friends or coworkers from his latest gig and said raised a toast to the guy and posted about it, I'd have thought that was cute and apt because hey, it's Dean's birthday!

But this thing they did with the hats and the play acting wasn't just cringe, it was destiew online make-believe wedding levels of cringe.

As far as the actual cast of that show goes, if any of them last in the business I expect to see this mess in someone's biography in the chapter about jobs that sucked and that still give them nightmares.

I'm with you. I'm fine with simple homages like a toast, or a throw-back post. The birthday party was a full-on cry for help from someone who can't move on.

I found it interesting that JoJo went on IG Live and at least one of the questions they answered was whose idea it was for the party. They're sitting there prevaricating over the fact that it was everyone's, but you could tell they were trying to absolve the Ackles from that cringefest. As if Jensen and Danneel weren't in a party store earlier that day picking up supplies.

"...it was destiew online make-believe wedding levels of cringe." Who would have ever guessed that Jensen would be resorting to Misha-stan levels of desperation only two years after SPN ended?

#ask box #anti jensen #anti jensen's ego #anti dean's birthday party

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fictionkinfessions · 5 months

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goddammit i miss my family!!!! the best family in the world!!!! goddammit!!!!

peter was always really nice and supportive. after our parents died he had to raise dee and i (i was like fourteen, but dee was a baby) and i wanted to try to take the work off of him a little so i started working and doing a lot of chores to help. he sat me down to make sure i wasn't overworking myself and tried to get me to understand that he could handle it. he liked to mess with my hair and he called me buddy or little buddy a lot, sometimes he'd let me sleep in his room because i was scared and we'd make it a sleepover. after i died for the first time he was the first person i went to, and he heard me out before jumping to conclusions and then helped me get cleaned up. neither of us knew how to do stitches but i was a dead man walking and a wanted criminal (wrongfully, at that point) so we made do with what we had. he let me choose what colour thread i wanted but pointed out specifically two shiny ones, gold and silver, because he knew i liked shiny things. i chose gold and every so often after that i'd run my hands and fingers over the stitches just as a nervous habit, though sometimes while thinking about him or dee. i ended up moving back in with him after the bakersfield location, which he was also the phone guy for. he didn't remember everything but god he was still him. i think i almost started crying when he let me in. after that he'd occasionally ask me questions about things i'd done since we'd lost contact after..everything, i remember one time specifically he asked me if i'd ever ended up dating anyone and i actually started choking before just going "oh you are going to be so mad at me" because yes! i had! ..i dated dave miller. the menace to society/aff. peter was absolutely horrified and very concerned. i think he used the "i'm not mad just disappointed" line. there also was one time, probably not too long after i started staying, where he sat me down to talk to me about everything i was doing around the house because i was taking on a lot of work again, in part because that's what i was used to by that point and in part because i felt i had to earn my place there. he asked me to rest and threatened to lock me in my room to get me to rest if i did not do so and that was...a mildly mortifying experience. i loved him so much he was the best brother ever

i didn't get to spend much time with dee while she was alive because i was working a lot but i remember that she loved drawing, and she would stick around me usually whenever i was home. i think either peter or i gave her her scarf. i ended up moving out and taking dee with me shortly after i turned 18 because i didn't want to keep making peter have to take care of us. she was absolutely amazed by fredbear's and had been asking if she could have her party there for ages. i let her have it there and took my eyes off her for one second and she just. disappeared. i was fucking broken after that. i don't know how long the time period between then and getting the job at fredbear's was mainly because i think i just started drowning myself in alcohol after dee died but i don't think it was that long. i found her again at bakersfield and tried to help her and the other souls move on, but i think she ended up stuck in the flipside. when dave and i found her again in the flipside she was very, very defensive and she just wanted to do what was right, which she thought was taking us down. she apologised profusely after the fight. she was probably one of the strongest people i knew, both physically and mentally, if that makes sense. she wasn't afraid to stand up for what she thought was right, and she cared so, so much about all of us. she couldn't use the age card since she was much younger than me but she pulled the height card constantly no matter how many times i told her that that did not matter. she loved to jokingly bully me and about half of the time i just accepted my fate. i loved her so much she was such a good sister

-jack kennedy (dsaf), #☀🌵🎭

📦

#fictionkinfessions #fictionkin #☀🌵🎭#jackkennedykin #dsafkin #chara love #orphaning cw #death cw

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grizzlyofthesea · 2 years

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Mushy Personal Emotion Turtles

So, as you can tell, I absolutely adore the Rise iterations of the turtles and April. I'd like to take this time to expound on just how much they mean to me, though.

The Mad Dogs' significance to me ties into my sibling relationships. I only have one biological brother, but I could make a case for there being two sibling figures in my life--my brother, and one of my cousins who may as well have been an older sister to me. My histories with both of them are rocky.

My brother has been part of my life for as long as I can remember; he's only a year younger than me. I've spent nearly all that time bickering with him and sometimes getting into more intense fights. It was at its worst when he was about 10 to 16 years old, so when I was about 11 to 17. We're doing better now. I think we've learned to appreciate each other's company more since we've both gone off to college. But having such a negative force in my life for so long was...not fun, to say the least.

Then there's my cousin. We used to play together all the time. When we were old enough to set up our own email addresses, we emailed each other basically all day, every day. It was fun at first, but something turned our relationship toxic. I'm still not quite sure what the catalyst was. She cut off contact with me after a particularly brutal argument, and I did not cope with it well at the time. At all. This happened during an already difficult time in my life, so I was a total mess. I'm doing better now, but it's not perfect. Family gatherings where I see her are still awkward even though this happened several years ago. I want things to go back to how they were, even though I know it was terrible for my mental health. It's awful. Every time I think I'm over it, I break down crying whenever the topic comes up.

In summary, even though I've always had at least one sibling figure present in my life, my relationships with them have almost always had some sort of strain on them.

This is where the turtles come in.

Seeing the turtles just...be brothers, with April as basically their sister, really struck a chord with me. I really wanted that in my life. For once, I just wanted to have a nice, normal, relaxed sibling relationship. Do they have silly arguments sometimes? Yeah. Do they have some major disagreements? Of course. But they always stand up for each other in the end. They never get into fistfights with the intent to seriously hurt each other. They never intentionally ignore each other's achievements. They love each other to the core.

I started joking with my friends that I'd "adopted" the turtles and April as my siblings, but then I decided to take it just a bit further. For fun, I did some tarot readings to determine what my relationships with them would be if they were my siblings.

First, I checked to see if they'd even accept me as a sibling. My deck has you draw three cards for a yes or no reading; the answer depends on how many "no" cards you draw. All three cards I drew indicated "yes." :)

Then, I drew individual cards for each unique sibling bond.

April: Queen of Swords

Indicates strength and resilience. I took this to mean a close, trusting bond.

Raph: Three of Cups

Represents comfort and fun. I feel like he'd be my "big little brother," protecting me just like the others even though I'm older than him.

Leo: The Hanged Man

Symbolizes uncertainty and limbo. It isn't a lost cause, but there would be the least trust between us.

Donnie: Seven of Pentacles

Stands for dedication and potential. We'd be loyal as all heck to each other, and we may even enble each other to excel.

Mikey: Nine of Cups

Represents support and love. We'd hang out a lot and get each other through tough times.

Are any of you weirdos like me who get way too attached to fictional characters? (I mean that in the kindest way possible.) Feel free to share your thoughts.

Thank you for coming to my Turtle Talk.

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wolverinedoctorwho · 1 year

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when people tell me i'm pretty - vent poem

when people tell me i'm pretty i think we're looking at two different people.

when people tell me i'm pretty i think they couldn't possibly mean me. they mean the idea of me in their head. they mean the me that comes out of my mouth, my traits, my personality. i'm funny enough that they find me attractive.

when people tell me i'm pretty i think they're looking at me from a completely different angle. like watching a show on a monitor where the colors are more vibrant than they should be.

even on the days when i feel pretty, i couldn't tell you what features of mine are actually desirable. undesirable, sure. i wish i was in better shape, i wish my hair wasn't a mess all the time, i wish my face didn't just look "wrong" in photos without great lighting and effort.

when i wear skirts i feel the least feminine i've ever been. when i try to do my own makeup i feel like the kid in the movies everyone made fun of for putting on his mom's dresses. i feel like someone trying to do what's expected of them, and failing, miserably.

when people tell me i'm pretty, i want to tell them they're wrong. i want to tell them they don't have to say that, that it's ok for me not to be pretty, that it's fine if i'm average at best. i want to tell them it hurts more to hear that than it would to just not talk about my body ever.

whenever i dress up and try to do my own makeup i feel like the ugliest person alive, and when people tell me i look pretty that way or smile and compliment me on stepping out of my comfort zone i want to cry. why are they so invested in me getting a passing grade in gender expression?

when people tell me i'm pretty, i wonder why it bothers me so much. is there another word that would suit me better? or is it simply my own anxiety and dislike of my body that makes me uncomfortable? is it because growing up i was never remarked on positively, only chastised by my mother for my messy hair and my stretch-marked thighs and my small chest and my stomach that sticks out no matter what i do? is it because nobody my age ever told me i was pretty, only old people who would have said that to me no matter what?

my ex-boyfriend used to call me sexy. we'd be in his bathroom, nude in front of the mirror, and he'd smother me with compliments, and i would stare at myself in the mirror and wonder what he saw that i didn't. it's hard to leave a bad relationship when they're the only one who's ever found you sexy.

when people tell me i'm pretty, i wish for a moment that we could swap. that i could see the girl they think is so pretty, and they could see the me that i think is not. maybe then we would understand each other. maybe then i'd *get it*. maybe i'd think she's pretty, too.

when people tell me i'm pretty, i smile, and i thank them. like you're supposed to do when someone compliments you.

and then i change the subject.

#poem tag: and miles to go before i sleep #vent tag: i never let them see the worst of me #i wanted to make this rebloggable but i don't want my notes full of people missing the point and going 'im sure youre pretty op!!'#it doesn't matter whether i am or not!#what matters is the divide between my perception of myself and others perception of me and how the two clash #i'm supposed to be singing in this event and people got really hyped to see me in a fancy dress and it's squicked me the hell out. so here.#i want to be pretty. i want to be sexy. but i'm just not #i'm just. not. yknow??

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moa-broke-me · 2 years

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Random PJO Drabble

Standing there in the infirmary, with my only living son laying on a hospital bed as machines beeped incessantly and the hiss of the oxygen mask filled the room, the tension was so thick I could barely even think about how ironic that the god of death should visit a place of life.

I squeezed his hand, his tiny, cold hand, for, what some irrational part of my mind insisted would be the last time, even though if someone was truly dying in this room, surely I, of all people would know. I suppose it's leftover anxiety from that one horrible winter.

His eyes fluttered open. "... Dad...?" He croaked out. "What... What are you doing here?"

I felt a rare smile appear at the sound of his voice, at the sight of his eyes. "I wanted to see you." I explained, sitting down on the rather uncomfortable plastic visitor's chairs. "I wanted to make sure you'd be ok."

He looked me up and down. "... Why?"

It was barely a whisper, but it hurt me more deeply than the cut of any spear or sword. I thought we'd made up, I thought our relationship had been repaired. But that he's in such disbelief that his own father would visit him in the hospital, even when I gave him the quest that landed him there... Indicated otherwise.

I took a deep breath, not usually necessary, but it helps. "Son, I... I haven't been nearly the father you need. And that's nobody's fault but my own. I just hope you don't see me as a monster like everyone else. Even if I've... Acted like it, in the past." My heart clenched as I remembered the cruel remarks of 'your sister would've done it better' and 'I wish it had been you'. My lying to him. My palm filling with black fire. Not exactly my proudest moments as a father. "I'd like to formally apologize, for all the wrongs I've inflicted upon you. Because I don't think I ever have. I... I know that I'm not good with words, or emotions, or people. But I truly do mean it. I..." Tears gathered in my eyes. "I don't want to lose another baby." I sighed. "I know it's ironic, but I... I've never had many mortal children, even before the oath. So I... I never quite became... Numb to it, the way the other gods have. And I suppose, since my first taste of grief in decades had been your sister..." From the corner of my eye, I looked over at Hazel. "... Your older sister... I reacted rather explosively. But I never should've taken it out on you, little one. You were in just as much pain as me, if not more. And I should've seen that." I wiped my eyes. "Oh dear, this is humiliating."

His brows scrunched in confusion. "Dad, are you... Crying? I... Didn't know gods could do that."

"Of course we can, have you seen what a mess your eventual father in law becomes when he gets rejected?"

He laughed, and then that laughing devolved into coughing, and I looked to his lover anxiously, who was chewing his lip. "He'll be ok. Well... Mostly. There's dust in his lungs, but this little stint on the mask should fix that. Broken ribs, a broken leg, internal bleeding, a concussion... Ok, maybe 'ok' was overshooting it. What in tarnation happened?"

"It was all my fault. I sent him after this ghost. Another Poseidon kid, apparently just as stubborn as the living one, because he escaped."

"I prefer determined." My nephew piped up.

I rolled my eyes. "Apparently, this one retained his powers after death. I sensed he was in danger, so I appeared by the cave he was in, and... He'd been crushed by falling rocks. I don't know if the ghost had lured him there intentionally, or had just been cornered, but either way, he must've generated an earthquake to shake the debris loose." I sighed and turned back to my son. "I can't let this happen again."

"I could..." Hazel spoke up. "... I could take on some of his-"

"Absolutely not." He interrupted. "I'm not letting you get put in harm's way. I'm stronger, I can handle it."

I was proud of him, for the love he held for his baby sister. "... Well, I'd love to say the same for you, Nico, but someone has to help me take care of things down there. However, from now on, whenever I need you to handle something like this, I'm sending a kindly one with you, to protect you."

He scoffed. "I don't need to be babysat."

"Clearly, you do, if this is what happens when you're not. This is for your own good, and it's not up for debate."

He sighed. "Yes, father."

"There's no need to be so formal anymore, bambino." I brushed a little hair out of his face, and turned, one last time, to his boyfriend. "Take care of him."

He cleared his throat. "U-um... Sure thing, sir. I will."

#hoo #percy jackson #pjo #hades #nico di angelo

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andswarwrites · 1 year

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Day 14

We're almost halfway through the month and the last few days have been pretty heavy. If anyone read all four days' worth of “bipolar” writing, thank you so much and I'm so sorry. And if anyone has read all fourteen days' worth of writing total , besides S-, who reads everything I write, I don't know what to say. Anyone who reads my writing and enjoys it moves me to continue my craft, and I am exceedingly grateful. So today's thousand words is going to be about my love of storytelling.

We've already established that I love reading, and I love writing. I also love movies and TV shows, Youtube and/or Tiktok videos and online articles: stories can unfold in so many different ways. From an anecdote over coffee to an epic tale at the cinema, storytelling shapes and enriches my life. I love a story that makes me laugh or just feel good, that's why my go-to favorite shows are comedies and slice of life anime. I also love something that stretches my imagination or makes me reflect, and that is why I love science fiction.

When I was little, my parents would rent a few movies over the weekend, and that would be how we would unwind as a family, we'd watch together. After S- and I got married, we would rent movies too, but he would rent movies he'd seen that I hadn't and I would rent movies that I'd seen and he hadn't, so we could get to know each other's tastes. He only messed up twice: he had me watch Twelve Monkeys (1995) and Hero (2002). I would probably be able to watch them at this point in life, but then I was too sensitive, and those movies made me cry uncontrollably. S- was very distressed.

One of my very best friends took a cinematic course in college where she learned about film noir, westerns, and I can't remember the third genre. Anyway, she would come over and we would watch classic movies from One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest (1975) to In the Heat of the Night (1967). I was used to classic movies because my mom loved old musicals, but exploring everything from Hitchcock's works to Casablanca helped me to develop a taste for pacing, dialogue, jump scares and plot twists.

When S- and I were dating, I told him how much I had loved the movie Serenity (2005). When he figured out that I had seen the movie but was unaware of the show, he went out and bought the DVD box set and I watched it. Apart from some TV shows I had watched as a kid, like 3rd Rock From The Sun and The Pretender, oh, and of course Star Trek Voyager, I didn't watch that much TV. Our TV was reserved for movies; we didn’t have Cable.

So S- and I started renting or buying certain boxed sets of TV shows on DVD, from House MD to Babylon Five and Stargate SGI + Atlantis. I developed such an obsession with the Stargate world that I wrote a fanfic about Elizabeth Weir, called Weir's Gate. It's the only fanfic I have ever written. When we finally broke down and got Netflix, we started watching a lot of shows, and some of them were anime. Thanks to anime, I started reading manga, because I wanted to know how the stories continued.

Anime on Netflix led to anime on Crunchyroll. That was when my appetite for slice of life formed. From Laid Back Camp to Chihayafuru, I love to immerse myself in Japanese culture. We didn't keep Netflix. I know, what's wrong with us? Crunchyroll seems to suit us better, as does Disney Plus. If we start subscribing to all the streaming services out there, we'll go broke. We have to pick and choose. I'll be honest, even though I have a healthy (or unhealthy, depending on your point of view) love of science fiction, it wasn't until The Mandalorian that I started to have affection for Star Wars. Please don't hurt me.

So the point I am trying to make is that as time has gone on, I have found all these different formats of stories to entertain me, from musicals as a kid, because my mom had four VHS tapes that my sister and I would watch together, to science fiction and sitcoms as a young adult, and also anime, in healthy doses, as well as classic black and white movies: my tastes in stories are ever evolving. And that is only visual media. In my reading I have discovered authors like Ken Follett and Barbara Kingsolver. Plus we lived near a comic book store for a few years, so I accumulated TPBs and graphic novels!

My daughter recently introduced me to certain Youtubers who tell stories through their artwork, most notably Neytirix. One of her videos features her garden, and how she fixed it up with the help of her mom, and at the end of her video she shares the art piece that she was inspired to create from her experiences. Spoiler alert: it is breathtaking. Another artist who uses nostalgia in her storytelling quite a bit is Whatsupbeanie, who I first started following on Instagram, but now also follow on Tumblr.

Most of the stories I enjoy are wholesome. From Fred Astaire to Alina Tysoe, all my life I have gravitated to something visually colorful and uplifting. And yet. Sometimes I crave a story that will destroy me. Run me through, pierce me to my very soul. Why? I have no idea. And yet other times I want to escape to a completely different reality: far off in the future or far off on some distant planet. All of these tastes are reflected in my writing. We write the stories we would like to read. Or at least we should. Our stories should stir us first. When I cry while writing a scene, S- cries while reading it, I kid you not.

So to cap it all off, what I am trying to say is with each passing year I am honing my skill as a storyteller through my love of stories. I'm not copying or plagiarizing, I'm absorbing. I'm assimilating and creating my own spin. Because nobody can tell a story the way I can, and I can't tell a story the way anyone else can. I need to embrace my distinct perspective, my distinct style, my choice of words. A close friend told me recently that I can't write a weak character. That made me want to try. She also told me my weak character would turn out to be strong in the end. That is probably true. Some of my friends REALLY know me well.

#storytelling #personal #movies #shows

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