#i have therapy in 45 minutes

[roryfrommybabysittersavampire]

I did not choose to have fucking cannibalism as a special interest but here we are folks :3 painted this in art class for a typography assignment.

#cannibalism #watercolor #I love the bible #there are surprising amount of bible verses about cannibalism. not one of them distinctly says not to do it :3 #i am not planning to eat anyone #autism posting #my evaluation is in exactly one week I can finally say that without feeling stupid soon #meow #gray stop typing pls #i have therapy in 45 minutes #this is a great use of my time #also writing a poem about being a dog #dog motif wants me dead #I'll update if I'm so insufferable she discontinues my care #my art #hey this animal can talk #yo update I'm autistic

[mintedaisies]

coming to the realization that im insanely cagey about sex & intimacy and its so fucking hard to even ATTEMPT to break out of it without professional help and even that is out of the question until at least november

#it SUCKS SO BAD #i dont like talking about it. at all. #my bf was talking to me about how his therapist recommended exposure therapy with touch and then he just. #held and rubbed my knee while touching our foreheads together #and it conjured this INSANE feeling of yearning and grief inside my chest #its so hard realizing just how much your trauma has affected you #i had to pull into a parking lot and cry about it for literally 45 minutes earlier #i have so many thoughts #but i want to feel comfortable with intimacy again #and not absolutely terrified of it #where the mint grows

[eggs-can-draw]

Me, immediately after having a stage 4 panic attack: maybe drawing my blorbs as furries will fix me

#eggs can speak #every time I have one (since I recently discovered my “freakouts’’ are actually panic attacks via therapy #) #I keep sitting there like #THIS CANT BE 45 MINUTES LIKE THAT ONE TIME #NEVER AGAIN #honestly that deserves a story time post all its own #but SADLY #ONE OF MY IRL MOOTS IS A BIT OF A NARC #AND TELLING THAT STORY COULD GET ME IN TROUBLE #so use your imagination ✨ #(this isn’t me like. mad at them btw. I’m not mad. love that moot to death. #you know who you are go drink some water) #oh shit wait #panic attack #tw panic attack #tw panic mention

[ouchhq]

this is an illustration from my illustrated book project !! ive been working on this whole thing for months now and its finally starting to take form and this is a v significative double page

#i painted two double pages in the past two weeks and i have to paint at least 4 or 5 before the project is complete and ive been working my #ass off betweeen doing this and going to the hospital for all kinds of exams and tests and now i have to work on a friends graduation party #as well and im just . exhausted #also i had covid for the past two weeks and its all just so much #im just trying to go on one day at a time #those 45 minutes of therapy every week have been the highlights of this past month

[wodnes--coyotl]

listening to this cover of johnny and mary that's so amazing.

i looked out the window and realized id been so enthralled in being on my phone and writing,

that i was surprised to see clouds gathering for rain,

because it's been so warm lately.

i thought about a face my dad used to make, and this feeling of his presence that i sometimes dream about in a distorted and grotesque way

sometimes this happens in a fleeting moment, i cant hold onto it, it slips between my fingers, and when it happens,

i cry, and i try to catch the feeling, to sit in it, but i can't

and in that moment, i related to him again and wished i could tell him sorry

maybe something about the synth in the song, the small window im looking at

i thought of a steakhouse we went to as a kid. i didnt understand why we were there. if we were poor, how could he afford it? he was always so unhappy after work. he would say something, his eyes were so exhausted, he was so defeated, but like a steer pressing on to survive, he continued to do so. that's how i knew him, my entire life, until the day he died.

sometimes i feel a heavy tired pressing-on that makes me feel similar to him. and mom. it's a texas thing. especially when the clouds gather over the plains.

i think about the slow silence of white walls and isolation and negligence and being left alone, the sorrow of my childhood that is a snowglobe of pain and mystery, and a safe haven that no one can take away from me, in a fucked up way.

i live in perpetual fear of the future

and trapped in the snowglobe of pain of the past

i see a break of blue in the clouds and think of the windows 98 i grew up learning how to use faster than my parents, at a very early age. i was younger than 6, because we still lived in dallas.

i think about being autistic, and my parents.

texas, the 90s, the pre-social media-readily-accesible-information world

the slow way people were allowed to not know everything

and the way that life will never be the same

how i think about killing myself every day but i dont want to and hopefully never will

and then i think of my parents dying hollow

at least my fathers skeletal self looked more human than hers did.

i wish i could scream.

im so alone

i dont know if anyone will ever understand me

and this is why i want to die

sometimes

thinking it will preserve me into a framed art piece behind glass

forever

but it wont, it will be nothing.

and that isn't what i want.

i dont want to die.

#i am really mentally unwell right now #i have therapy in 45 minutes and i have to mask because im in my inlaws house #i need the space to be crazy and unhinged

[gender-snatched]

i want onion rings so bad

#i usually get them when i get therapy (mondays) but this time im having therapy virtually later so no onion rings ;-; #its cuz the therapy is like 45 minutes away #and theres this place with INCREDIBLE black bean burgers and very good onion rings

[lover-of-mine]

Me: *has been going to therapy every week for the past 3 years*

Me: *mentions my therapist*

Mom: wait you have a therapist?

Me: 😶😶😶😶😶😶😶😶😶😶😶

#no mom every Tuesday i leave the house and sit in an empty room for 45 minutes #.-. #im so confusedi #its not? new information? #i go to therapy? #of course i have a therapist? #dad was the one that found her for me? #you know that? #????????? #thoughts thoughts thoughts

[anderperries]

anybody wondering, i am… i still love her. very very much. i haven’t unstanned, at least yet. i just also don’t feel comfortable stanning rn either if that makes sense. i need to make it through my concert this weekend and then take a deep look at my brain and everything.

#i have therapy today but like y’all… this is genuinely one of the lowest things wrong with me rn landianfjwb #like my therapy session is 45 minutes and imma need at least 4 hours today #i don’t even know if i’ll be able to GET to discussing the taylor part of my emotions #molly talks swift

[sourkitsch]

If I was able to look at my own face without feeling viscerally uncomfortable or was able to follow through on things I say I’m gonna post but never do I think I’d kinda be cool as a YouTuber

#obviously about art history. imagine. I just rant at you for 45 minutes #several people have said I should do asmr or voice audiobooks #multiple years of speech therapy will do that I guess #unfortunately I still do have a bit of an accent so like. niche asmr . asmr guy from new york

[fingertipsmp3]

The amount of people who seem to enjoy spending time with a lot of people for a long period of time baffles the shit out of me man

#like gatherings and such #don’t get me wrong; if i’m functioning at above 80% of myself i can happily spend time with my friends or pleasant people for many hours #especially if there is alcohol and i am sitting in a comfortable chair. never underestimate the power of the comfortable chair #you put me in a stool and i’m bowing out an hour in. give me an armchair? i’ll still be there 8 hours later flirting with someone ineptly #you make me stand? i’ll walk away in 5 minutes or less #anyway what prompted this was my mom is currently at an all day; 12 hour long wedding #it’s all happening at one fucking venue. ceremony; meals; drinks; everything #in fact i think it was technically 14 hours because doors open at 10:30am and you don’t have to leave until 12:30am #the way i’m so glad i wasn’t invited. i would’ve rsvp’d saying unless you can pay for 14 hours of therapy i will not be spending 14 hours #in PUBLIC. fucking HORRIBLE #imagine choosing that for your wedding though. imagine thinking. i know what i want to do. spend FOURTEEN HOURS with not only my closest #friends and family; but also a couple hundred of the biggest randos we can dredge up #you had the ability to plan Everything and you were like. yep. let’s make it fourteen hours long #bro i’m too much of a loser to ever get married; but if i did it would start to finish take an hour #you get 5 minutes to get your ass in the venue and sit the fuck down and then i’m walking down the aisle. if you’re late you’re not coming #ceremony takes like 10 minutes then for 45 minutes we’re having drinks of some sort and maybe an ice cream van #and stay if you want but i’m leaving an hour after i arrived. i don’t care if the minister was delayed an hour and i’m not actually married #yet. i allocated an hour. it’s taking an hour. don’t hug me. i’m going hone #*home #a fourteen hour party is incomprehensible to me. i would rather do just about anything else for 14 hours #personal

[bibleofficial]

my brother is being so weird like leave me out of it !!!! i mean he’s having an emotional breakdown or smthg idk but why’s he bringing it to ME !!!! take it to SOMEONE ELSE mr. MONEYBAGS !!!! what do u want from ME !!!! take ur own advice & ‘get over it’ !!!

#diary #like ‘it’s all in ur head !!!’ like yea buddy now u don’t like that it’s in URS huh #wish i cared ! #go DRINK ALONE like an ADULT #or do other DRUGS #like sorry i’m spending all my money on drugs & i love it #not him going ‘i love u’ ‘i’m happy that we’re siblings’ girl STOPPPP the DRAMAAA #shut the fuck up !!!!!!!!!!!!!! i’m not payed enough for this !!!!!!!!!!!!!! #he’s like ‘wow work is so tough’ bro u play video games for 6 of the 8 hours u are on the clock #what do u WANT FROM ME !!!!!!!! #i’ve been live typing this since he’s come to bother me #‘do u ever overthink’ what are we 12 i swear to god if he doesn’t threaten to kill himself im going to put my head through a wall ur a grown #he keeps talking abt ‘when u used to go to therapy’ like yea when i went to therapy after telling our father that he was the reason i kept #wanting to kill myself #like nearly 10 years ago & haven’t been back since like 2018 😭😭😭 #like if u want to go to therapy do it on ur OWN TIME #bro it’s been like 20 minutes i’m so fucking mad i was going to rest by eyes for 45 minutes before showering but he’s eating up like half of #it & i still have to fucking shower #i’m fumin #the way i’m just laying on the couch silently minding my own business full resting bitch face staring at my phone while he sits on the stool #w his head in his hands like girl get a GRIP #go do this BY URSELF ALONE IN UR ROOM #LIKE EVERYONE FUCKING ELSE IN THIS WORLD #like oh my GOD #if i can do this ??? if i can unhealthily stuff my emotions in myself while relying solely on nicotine caffeine & thc constantly so i can’t #focus on anything in my head :3c #SO CAN U !!!!! #develop REAL addictions douche bag !!!!! #the way he’s saved this shit to pull for MY spring break like ok #so i just can’t fucking enjoy anytbing

[omarfor-orchestra]

Ok I'll try to go study in the library next month

#i can't do this anymore #i need to get out of this house #i hate studying in the library it doesn't work for me but I'm going insane #you know what they don't tell you about therapy? #that you have to deal with the things you talk about during those 45 minutes for the rest of the fucking week #and i can't get out of the appointment with the realization that my parents are doing things wrong and there's not much i can do right now #and go home like nothing happened #sorry I'm worse than usual today but i found out i lost weight again and I'm frustrated out of my mind #tw weight mention #rant

[fantabulisticity]

I should apply for Medicaid before my therapy appointment, but I just wanna nap, lol

#i'm gonna nap for 45 minutes then eat then go to therapy then clean the kitchen then apply for medicaid #bc if i get this job then i won't need it and i can always unenroll but if i DON'T get this job then i'll have no insurance next year #personal #i also want to set up my dressers and loset but there's only so much time in a day etc

[musical-chick-13]

See, the WORST thing about discovering a new OCD Issue™ is having to go, “Guess I gotta talk about this in therapy.”

#not that going to therapy is bad or even that I have problems talking about my Stuff™ during sessions it's just that this illness is #so fucking weird and it's like 'welp gotta have ANOTHER conversation about 45 unrelated logic loops that lead me to a conclusion that #makes no objective sense but invades every braincell I still have' and like. I'm tired y'all. #the SECOND-worst thing about discovering a New Issue™ is when you spend 45 minutes on something and then belatedly realize that #you just did a compulsion and it's too late to go back and use the Therapy Tools now #LOVE IT HERE -_- #mc13 and her ocd

[readychilledwine]

Heavy

Summary - Being a mother is so much harder than you expected, especially when Cassian is gone

Warnings - motherhood, signs of postpartum

A/N- I needed therapy, and this happened. To all my readers who are moms, readers who want to become moms, or dedicated aunts who are bonus moms: you are all amazing, strong, and valued.

You closed your eyes as your daughter cried out for the fifth time tonight. 

She had just fallen asleep. She was warm, content, fed, clean diaper. You didn't know what you were doing wrong, but when she wasn't on your chest, her small wails would break the silence of the House of Wind. You sat up, picking her up to try to stop the crying and sat against the headboard. 

Cassian had been gone for the past 4 days in Windhaven. He had, begrudgingly, agreed to go with Rhys and Azriel. Each item he packed was slammed into his bag haphazardly before he finally realized his anger was keeping your daughter awake, her little wings fluttering with each loud noise. He had slept with her skin to skin the whole night. He refused to allow anyone else to hold his girl before he left in the morning. 

And Gods her cries when she realized daddy wasn't there, that daddy wasn't going to cuddle after feedings with mommy that day, they shattered you. 

She loved her daddy. She loved you. She wanted you both at all times.

But daddy had to work, you would whisper before crying too. 

Tonight had been your last straw. You didn't remember the last time you bathed and changed clothing, the last time you slept for more than 30 to 45 minutes at a time.

The tears came before you could stop them. Cassian's absence had taken a huge toll on your mental health as you constantly had your newborn attached to your breasts, in your arms sleeping on you, crying for you if you so much as left the room to go to the bathroom.

You leaned your head back crying with her little sniffles, “I know, babygirl. I miss daddy too.” 

Cassian glared at Rhys as your stress and emotion stuck him. You had grown so exhausted that keeping the bond locked tight was no longer an option. "She's fine, Cassian. She's a great mom," Rhys said softly. "I wouldn't have pulled you away if she couldn't handle it."

Azriel made a face, having stayed the past week with you and Cassian at the house to be an extra hand. "She's an amazing mother, Rhys, but Sulwyn is a daddy's girl," Azriel leaned against the wall in the cabin. "This is probably overwhelming for all three of them. It's only be 4 weeks."

Cassia was about to respond, thanking Azriel for understanding, but you sent him one last wave before you realized the bond was open. It was that last emotion that hit him that had him standing without warning and taking off. 

That he had never felt from you before. That feeling of completely worthlessness, of self doubt, of complete self loathing. 

He pushed himself, straining each sore muscle before landing hard on your shared balcony in record time. 

And the sight inside broke his heart. 

Your daughter crying on your chest, and you with her, telling her you didn't know what else to try, what was wrong.

“Give her to me,” he said softly. “Give me our daughter. Go bathe. Do something for you.” You shook your head, holding her tighter. “y/n, give me our baby. You need a break, sweetheart. I can feel it. I can feel you falling apart. I can feel the pit forming. Let me take care of you two.”

“But Rhys-”

“Can fuck all the way off. My wife isn't okay. You need to give me Sulwyn and take a break.” You moved slowly, handing Cassian the tiny Illyrian female who instantly calmed in his arms. His face softened immediately, heart warming. “I missed you too, baby.” 

He felt the moment that shattered you too. Another heavy emotion hitting the bond. 

You sat curled up in the tub for what felt like hours. It was long enough Cassian had put Sul down and now sat next to you.

“Tell what’s going through your head,” he pushed wet hair behind your pointed ear. “Talk to me, sweetness.”

“I feel worthless. Like I've lost my sense of who I am and all value I held to the court.” You paused, wiping a few stray tears. “I feel like a burden to you, her, and now our family.”

That one struck Cassian straight in his heart. “You could never be a burden.”

“I can't even calm our daughter to sleep,” you broke again, voice shaking as you began to sob. “All I am her is her personal food slave. No one said it would be this hard.”

“I know, y/n.” Cassian sighed deeply. “We need to get you out of the House,” Cassian tilted your head to him, kissing your forehead lightly. “Madja warned us about this, remember? She warned us that you potentially would start to feel really down. Everything you are feeling is normal, even if it's so far from true.”

Cassian kissed your lips gently. “I need you to listen to me and hear me right now, okay? You are not a burden. You are not worthless. You are not her personal feeding dummy. You are her mother. Her  best friend. Her safe place.” Cassian paused, wiping your tears. “You are my wife. My mate. You are the strongest female I know. You birthed an Illyrian with the wrong anatomy and somehow survived. You're caring for a newborn the size of your torso, and you do it with a smile and without voicing these feelings. She and I would be lost without you.”

He paused again, a small squeak being heard from the bedroom before silence fell back over. “You are her favorite person. She lights up at just the sound of your voice. I have to cuddle her under your blanket. Yes, she was upset and missed me, and Gods I missed her, but you are her world. And you both are mine, and it is killing me to see you like this.”

Another small squeak came. “She's hungry,” you whispered. 

“Would a shitty mom know that just from the noise she's making?” You shook your head, allowing him to help you stand And wrap you in a warm towel. “I'll hold you two while she eats, so you can fall asleep if you want?” 

It was such a little gesture. One of his small smiles gracing his face as he carried you back into your shared room. 

Cassian dressed you gently kissing your fingers, your palms, your cheekbones. He laid in the bed with you two motioning for you to come between his legs and holding Sulwyn to you. 

“Tomorrow mama is going to leave for awhile, Sul. You, daddy, and Auntie Nesta will hang out while Uncle Az takes mom to the Cafe they like to go to so they can discuss the latest in gross spy shit-” Cassian froze behind you. “Stuff.”

He smiled looking down and realizing you had fallen asleep in his arms. “You, little baby,” he looked at Sulwyn, “Are beyond loved. We need to make sure mama feels that way too, okay? Daddy is going to tell Uncle Rhys to shove it tomorrow. Then we're going to work on spoiling mommy.”

Your daughter gave Cassian a small smile, looking up at him with bright doe eyes as she continued eating. “That's my girl.”

#acotar #acotar x reader #cassian x reader #cassian #cassian acotar #girldad!cassian #girldad!cassian x reader

[waynefamilyreactions]

The Batfamily goes to Group Therapy

- How am I feeling? Like I want to be dead again.

- You mean depressed?

- Jesus Christ.

- Why can’t we leave again?

- Alfred locked the doors.

- I am too sober for this.

- I don’t have favourites I love all my kids the same.

- Oh please, Father, we have all made peace with the fact that Grayson is your favourite. He is also my favorite. Drake is last.

- How honest Can we be without being sent to the psychiatric?

- Ma’am please, I didn’t ask for this. I was adopted last.

- I refuse to stay here and listen to Drake talk about his issues.

- Daddy issues? Yes thank you we had not a fucking clue.

- I am sorry I can’t help being awesome all the time and that you’re all jealous of me.

- The day I am jealous of you Todd, please feel free to put me out of my misery.

- Maybe if I hold my breath for long enough I’ll pass out.

- I swear to God, Goldie if you post another picture on instagram stories of this shitshow, I will kill you…

- …I’ll kill you with kindness.

- Can we order pizza? We’ve been here for hours.

- it’s been only 45 minutes

- yes I second that.

- Vegan if you must.

- Alexa, How many apples do I have to eat to get Cyanide poisoning?

- come on brat we’ve been here for hours just say it.

- seriously ma’am I shouldn’t be here.

- Fine. Drake you are mediocre at best but Father could have done much worse. In fact he has. He adopted Todd.

- It’s not too bad we’ve done some improvement

- quick someone knock me out.

#jason todd #damian wayne #tim drake #dick grayson #batman #batfamily #bruce wayne #batboys #duke thomas #batbrats