#i should be working on school stuff but then i figured im def not focusing with pearls stream

[isjasz]

brush experiment pearl stream doodles o/

#pearlescentmoon #ft ren gem impulse and grian #hermitcraft #hermitcraft season 10 #hermitblr #isdoodles #i should be working on school stuff but then i figured im def not focusing with pearls stream #so i tried to do ddd but ended up with these instead HSAJKDAEHLHA #pearlo :D

[blueskiesandstarrynights]

Aight, so while you type that up, Imma do the Douglas ask.

When he was younger, his parents always favored Donald. They blatantly preferred him in everything. He always tried to do better and make them proud, but they didn't care, they only really cared about whatever Donald did. Anything that he did was overlooked and anything that the two of them did together they only praised Donald for. (Albeit Donald was held to incredibly high standards to the point where any little thing could get him in trouble, so he didn't have it that good either.) Donald never really stood up for him, though, when he was getting in trouble despite him always doing so for Donald, so while, yes, Donald did definitely care about Douglas immensely, he still left a bad impression on him. (He was really cool in school, though. A troublemaker, yes, but he was freakin' cool. All the kids loved him. Donald wasn't so lucky, sadly.)

His parents were also really traditional and strict about religion, so he was raised with a shit ton of internalized homophobia. He realized he was bisexual after a couple of kids in middle school were making fun of one of the janitors for being gay. Obviously, he had no fucking clue what the meant. So he asked, and after it was explained to him, he really just went Oh. Him and the janitor became good friends after that. He was the only adult he 100% trusted and I'd like to believe Douglas was one of the speakers at his funeral. He has a few relationships with people of both genders, but all of his same-sex relationships usually ended pretty quickly because of his internalized homophobia. He came out to Donald when they were in high school, although that was a complete accident. (He caught him in bed with someone while their parents were away.) It went well, albeit very awkward and embarrassing. Donald is many things but homophobic ain't one of 'em.

After Douglas and Donald kind of separate from their parents a bit, he starts to come into his own person and get over some of his fears. Davenport Industries really takes off, and he actually gets a fair share of spotlight. But the praise kind of gets to him, which sets him on the bad path he went down. After some conversations with Donald, though, he decides that what he was doing was too much, and figures that android would have been a better idea. Donald catches him and doesn't give him a chance to explain anything or defend himself, though, so he's kicked out. He fakes his death thinking that its for the best, but manages to grab Daniel in time and takes him with him. Realizing that he can't exactly provide for Daniel, he puts him up for adoption, and works on his plan for revenge.

He figures that he should follow up on that android idea, hence Marcus' creation a little down the line. Without a lot of funds though, he tries to break into some rich guy's place and rob him. Enter Krane. Unlike Donald, though, he gave him a chance to explain himself before giving up to the authorities. And, Krane, being the fucking crazy person he is, decides that they should work together. Douglas gives him bionics, he gives Douglas funding for his experiments, its a win-win situation! This also leads to a relationship spawning between them, which turns out really well!! Except for the fact that it doesn't. Krane is very obviously not a good person and was really abusive towards Douglas. In all ways. I'd like to think that the dad Marcus was talking about would hurt him for ruining his guitar wasn't Douglas, but Krane, because, let's face it, Marcus would be fucking scared.

Fast forward to the current canon, not much is different in my mind. Douglas and Tasha definitely have wine nights, and his relationships with Donald are slowly but surely mending. He has tons of stuff that he does with Adam, Bree, Chase, Daniel, and now Oliver, Kaz, Skylar, and AJ. Things are going pretty good for him.

Y'know, until he got shot with a death orb and the series got cancelled without telling us what fucking happened. No I am not still salty.

bestie,,,,this is so good oh my god you just fed me so much content. I'm irrationally attatched to these two shows and find so little content for it, this is so good.

Man totally grew up with so much internalized hemophobia its ridiculous. Also, they definetly gave off the vibe of donald being the favored sibling by their parents, so excellent point there.

also yeah lbr krane and douglas had a relationship but it was def one sided, krane was def using him :(

also i love him being responsible enough to realize that hes not fit to raise a kid rn and puts him up for adoption, i know this is canon, but I love how he's like "yeah lil too focused on the revenge plan to raise a kid, ill give him to someone who can"

also i got distracted and im thinking about lgbt lab rats, correct me if im wrong, but when that lead actor dude(who was the robot giselle made) wasn't like everyone swooning over him? guys and girls? like it wasnt subtle right? im p sure both adam and bree found him hot, and chase def would have if he wasn't so suspicious of him (douglas too, but he was too busy going 😍 ex pls notice me 🥺(but again correct me if im wrong, its been a while)

#i love our infodump solidarity right here #asks #lrefmm #douglas davenport #marie (champion of making plankton a tumblr sexyman)

[notmanagingmymischief]

ok ok first of all, thank you for being so sweet with me :") i love you sm sxjnsjxhs 💕💕

now. im just going to say that this happened irl btw lol so. yeah, theres this friend of mine who i like quite a bit, they have always managed to be nice and understanding of my anxiety, adhd and what else is probably going on inside my brain lol so i grew very fond of them and also came to trust them a lot.

but, today, while we were doing a group project w the just the two of us, when deciding upon a few matters i became overwhelmed and couldnt think properly - which happens quite often tbh - and they then suddenly snapped at me for being 'way too slow' regarding figuring things out for said project, and that i should just do things on the spot, and do them quickly - even though thats something i kept on telling them about ever since we met, that this is definitely not how it works for me, unfortunately.

i became rather defensive because if that was something that i could change for their sake then i would do so at any given moment, trust me on that. but i couldnt. i mean, its my brain after all-

i tried to tell them that we were different, that despite whatever they tried to say i couldnt just work at the very same pace as them. but after some ridiculous arguments being thrown, i was just tired and decided to shut up and continue on doing what we were doing anyway.

so.. what made me extremely confused is that they never acted that way with me, they were always so sweet and just. so understanding of me. i was genuinely sad to see them angry like that and cant stop wondering if i did something wrong, or if me being so slow was actually my fault.

i just. dont know what to think of this and wanted a clearer picture before just deciding to talk to them about this, you know ?

im sorry if this is confusing, and if so i can totally make a few things clearer for you - add details and such.

i just want to know if im in the wrong here, and if im the one who should be properly apologizing to them about this-

also. theyre very focused on the school system and tend to be very strict regarding lessons and stuff like that, so them lashing out like this because we were late to deliver this project would be def reasonable, but they always seemed to understand where i stood in such a fucked up system and that i couldnt function or thrive in a place as such like they could, so i always hoped and assumed that they truly came to know about matters like this, and that they wouldnt get mad at me for not being able to fit in properly.

(i too dont know why they kept on being by my side all this time if im way too slow for them, or why they kept on pairing up with me if they have more than friends than i will ever have on that school. they could have just picked someone else, but despite knowing how slow i am they still accepted being my partner and still came to lash out on me for being. me apparently ?)

i genuinely dont know what happened and dont want to continue on making them angry at me because of this, and i surely dont want to lose the only friend i have there.. so, if you have any advice or if you might know what the hell just happened id greatly appreciate it ;;

(sorry for the huge text btw. im just bad at like. summarizing things)

sorry this took me forever to answer i was proofreading some work mbgfhtjv

ANYWAY i did my best to space this out well enough to understand--at least how it would help me to understand hyugtjhrytnh-

now this is...this is a really tough topic hun. as someone who also has executive dysfunction--not that i'm saying that's what you necessarily have, i'm just using the term from my end--i know what it's like to not be able to work at the same pace as everyone else.

so i'll let you know the most important thing first: this was not your fault. it will never ever be your fault that you don't work the same way that they do. alright? that's very very important to remember, no matter how much you may feel like it.

it is not your job to apologize for being different, that's like me apologizing for not liking guys when my best friend is only attracted to men, you understand? you didn't choose to be born different, just like i didn't choose to be born gay.

now that that's through. i realize how difficult this is to comprehend, especially as it's coming from someone you trust and has been here through this, working with you. it's exceptionally strange that they would just....do that randomly? however they could have issues at home, or online, etc. there's a multitude of reasons why they could have snapped today; things could have been building for a while and your comment might have just made them break.

i think the best approach for you--and you in no way have to do this, i'm just going off personal experience yet again--would be to address them privately, ask them if they're doing well and be nice about questioning what happened. don't accuse them of doing something wrong, just tell them that, hey, that really hurt me and i'm really confused on why you'd do this when you've been nothing but sweet with me.

you know? i hope that all makes sense, again i'm sorry for taking ages to answer hutrgjhn

i love you!! 💚💚

#ask #my beloved jupiter

[dicaeopolis]

Srry idk if this is out of line & if it is I apologize & feel free to delete etc but iirc uv posted abt being diagnosed with adhd b4 & I was wondering if ud mind me asking when/what was that like? Bc as a young adult woman Im finding myself relating 2 a lot of tumblr adhd posts goin round (+ im in grad schl & starting 2 feel like my life is spinning out of control & im barely holding it 2gether) but idk if these r just normal feelings or if its actually worth being concerned & going to a dr abt

Yaa ok so. I got formally diagnosed uhhhh like midway through college?? (symptoms I had/have down below the cut) ADHD and Asperger’s at the same time. Didn’t go on any meds cause I’d seen ADHD meds take a lot of people’s personalities in exchange for productivity. Which isn’t to say that meds can’t be useful or wonderful for people?? It’s personal preference and I think usually worth a try. I was just mostly focused on treating depression, I was on Lexapro for a really long time. I think it’s defs worth going to a doctor, worst-case scenario it’s not ADHD but then at least you’d know, best-case you start getting treatment you need.

I wanna say about my experience with school. there’s a lot of comorbidity between ADHD and depression/anxiety, usually with the mental illness as a symptom of the disorder’s difficulties. i spent 8 years of school getting treated for depression. and then i started spending my summers working in the outdoors and i forgot my meds one July and. i was okay? It would’ve been Code Red Danger Imminent during the school year, but when I was moving around and doing things with my hands and in an interesting environment and only working 45 hours a week (I was spending 70-80 on schoolwork) I didn’t need meds one bit.

and i realized that it wasn’t that ADHD makes me a bad person or worker, just that sitting and typing and reading all the time is a bad environment for me. esp because everything takes 3x as long with ADHD and I didn’t have enough extra time/energy to do anything else active/interesting with my life. I graduated last May and I’ve been doing full-time work in the outdoors since then (trails and chainsaw crews, going into wildland firefighting next fall), and I’m not on any meds and I’m the steadiest I’ve ever been. i keep schedules, i’m emotionally stable, i’m good at interacting with people, i’m reliably good at what i do, all like it’s nothing. that’s huge for me.

so yeah I think you should probably go to a doctor. even if it isn’t ADHD that’s a step towards figuring out what’s up and getting help for it. and I wanna say, you can do school with ADHD. it’ll be hard, you’ll have to sacrifice one thing or another, but if you love your field and you want to do this with your life you can. im still glad I got my degree. I know tenured professors with ADHD who are managing just fine.

but everyone is gonna tell you that same thing so i’ll give you my side of it too. school is stressful. ADHD makes you bad at sitting still and focusing which makes it more stressful. You can get on meds and get therapy and learn all the coping mechanisms possible and it’s still gonna be more stressful and harder for someone with ADHD. idk details but it sounds like you aren’t having a great time being in school. and yeah you could force yourself through classes and listen to everyone telling you that you need to be melting your brains out at a desk somewhere cuz capitalism, but you don’t gotta. if school isn’t worth it you can go find something that’s better for you, it’s okay to leave, i mean it.

(symptoms mentioned above below the cut)

hyperfixating as a kid but it’s on stuff like princesses or warrior cats so it doesn’t get noticed

having a hard time taking notes/listening in class unless you’re also doodling or fidgeting with something

getting REALLY into the internet bc it’s pretty much just a constant high-speed stream of stimulation and hyperfixation content

getting good grades until it stops being easy and starts requiring focus. I did continue getting good grades all the way through college but it started taking worse and worse tolls on me, it’d take me like 2 hours to read a 20-page article and I wouldn’t remember anything unless I took detailed notes and I missed deadlines etc etc etc.

i was a nervous fucking wreck in high school but my grades were still pretty good so it never really got looked into i think

echolalia

good at things but. only sometimes and it’s completely unpredictable

forgetting Everything

interrupting a lot

impulsiveness, but also getting frozen up over all your different impulses and ending up doing Nothing

that advice about “oh just do a little bit each day!”/”take a break every half-hour!” being like. The worst advice ever I will do this all in one go or I will do it never

overexplaining everything cuz your thought patterns look like a scribble

I was a really quiet kid in elementary school into middle school but when I started my (pretty drawn-out) coming-out process i got a lot more confident, and with that i got just IMPOSSIBLE to deal with in school. Like off the fucking wall bonkers. And started being the kind of troublemaker that boys with ADHD often are in elementary school. So I feel like it’s less about genetic differences between afab and amab people, and more about socialization. Either way I’ve always been super social online, just too awkward irl to exhibit it for a while

^if that paragraph was a lil tough for you to get through and your eyes kinda skipped over it. That might be a sign.

#long post #adhd #Anonymous #.txt

[thattaekwondoblog]

Green Stripe: blanking out & stuff

so this is the first belt that i really didn’t feel ready for. I had gone to practice every day in the month of January (except sundays & the last two days bc I fell sick), but in February a bunch of stuff kept me away from practice (mostly grad school apps & work). this is also the time stuff happened in my personal life which may or may not have involved some dojang members (not so much beef as communication issues in a few friendships) so i was feeling extra insecure. So much happened since this so I kinda forget but essentially the test was at the end of February and i felt #severely unprepared, despite my instructors encouraging me to test. honestly my test day was so traumatic i blocked out most of my training from that period sadly.

Things that happened:

dear reverse inner forearm block: you little shit. you absolute mess. coordination was never really my thing so that sht messed me up really bad. it is a really beautiful block though.

원효 wonyo was a cool form, even though confusing; first time that a ‘common stance’ isn’t used always. also we’re not going in straight lines anymore??? what????

i don’t remember struggling too much with the one steps except for like the order of them.

sparring! i like!! sparring!! so much more than i thought i would. the only thing i dislike about it is the Eventual Lower Belt Man who is ‘afraid to go too hard’ or ‘can’t control his strength’ and talks all the fcking time. bro shut up, stop being a dck and humble yourself will ya. your masculinity issues have no place in fighting. we all are learning so stfu and try.

I’m still very much in ‘defense mode’ while sparring; i like to observe more than attack. this is bc i feel like the ppl i spar against generally have more experience or strength and so i overcalculate everything bc i think im gonna make mistakes. this has brought particular joy to one red belt friend who Will Not Attack Me on purpose so I attack first. i love you bro but i also know as soon as i attack you’ll see all my openings and murder me. it’s def something im working on.

Advice/what helped:

some days you’re gonna feel awfullll and it will transpire in your practice even if you try to hide it. there was one day i was Not feeling it and of course my master wanted to tease me and make me laugh as he usually does. it was really hard to not say Sir Please Leave Me Alone I Need To Be Left Alone, but i also knew I would never have wanted to take my sht out on anyone. pushing myself to practice that day was good, but also know that if you’re feeling too bad one day skipping practice is okay.

i got to know some dojang members better, which was fun! plz talk to your older/younger/higher level/other members and get to know them. even when some seem intimidating, it’s so interesting to hear everyone’s tkd stories

on the flip side, training with ppl you love and ppl you not longer vibe with so much can be complicated. im still figuring it out. i guess ive mostly opted for respect and have fun during training, not letting issues transfer to the mats. i love my instructors and tkd wayy too much to let personal issues interfere with class (even though it’s not always easy to do).

the belt test:

nothing prepared me for how this test went. i was stressed about it bc i was feeling unprepared but the week before I went to practice very often to try to catch up and in the end was feeling a little more confident. the test day arrives and my body feels ok until im called up. i was the only one testing in my category. My mind felt fine, I stayed focused, but my body... started shaking while i do my techniques. and it was only the first part of the test. i was like wtf bc id never experienced anything like this before. then came the form. I began and after the fifth move... i got tunnel vision and my mind went blank. even the grand master was trying to help me and my master asked me to relax. i started again and finished, albeit not greatly. the one steps are a blur bc i just wanted to get back to my seat and disappear. I saw stars when i sat back down. pretty sure i was about to faint up there. my master came to check on me after the test saying my face became white through the test. why? how? i dont fcking know. again this had never happened to me before. ive done tons of presentations, theatre performances ect... even though i felt ok mentally my body was like Nope Absolutely Not and launched in a panic attack (i used to have an anxiety disorder where i would get anxiety attacks, but i hadn’t had a panic attack in like.. years). i think it’s the combination of stresses in all the parts of my life (social, school, work, somewhat tkd) that culminated and i freaked out. i took the day off of work the next day bc stuff like this Never happens to me and you gotta listen to your body when it’s screaming this loud.

main lesson: you’ll never be fully ready for things. but also listen to yourself. it’s a veryy fine balance. it was really not a big deal that my moves weren’t as perfect as I wanted to since my master thought i was good to go I should have been more confident. at this time though, my life felt like i was going at 343242 miles/hour and i absolutely should have taken a full day of time alone to lay out my thoughts and feel more secure. bc what happens in your mind directly influence your tkd, and that’s why you need to take care and listen to yourself even when everyone else is so loud.

#budoblr #tkd #taekwondo #martial arts #mine #belts #green belt #anxiety #panic attack

[queeranarchist]

uhhh every 5th q for the ask meme?

:O

5) What was the first time you suspected you were transgender?

uhhh first time i remember was when I cut my hair off - for an SPN Lucifer cosplay of all things - and was like hell yeah I look like a dude! Radical! and then was like oh that is not a very CisThought™️

10) What have your experiences with packing or wearing breast forms been?

you know i bought a pretty expensive packer and it was waaay too large despite being one of the smaller ones of that model - this was apparently a problem a lot of guys had and their were videos on how to cut it to make it fit but it cost a lot and i was too worried about ruining it - anyway i moved house three and a half times in six months and my stuff is currently in between two houses and I have No Idea where it is and in the back of my mind there is the constant fear that someone will find that dick 

15) What labels have you used before you’ve settled on your current set?

i’ve used pretty much every label sexuality wise bc attraction is weird. gender wise i ided as a trans man until last yearish and now im just like im queer in all senses

20) What do you wish you could have shared with your younger self about being trans?

prooobably a lot of gender abolitionist stuff like meets past self and just holds a reading group of Nobody Passes by Matt Sycamore - like i hate the transmed/truscum view point but i see that a lot of it is pushed by 15 year old trans guys and the whole wanting to be cis/as close to cis as possible and you can have pride in being LGB but not in being trans thing is pretty much how i experienced gender until last year where i was like time to make the Conscious effort to rework my thoughts, i didnt end up in the dysphoria discourse largely bc it wasnt a big thing when i first realised i was trans (lmao no trans issues were big things at that point) - in general i’d want to get myself to work on a more intersectional approach in terms of understanding that the gender binary is a western colonialist construct and that capitalism pushes queerphobia by wanting to minamalise community reliance and further their profit by pushing a nuclear child producing way of structuring relationships - basically get little me to turn all that angst and anger @ the system

25) What do you wish cis people understood?

that they arent the end goal, i detest the view they have that trans people should be glad to be told that they look like a “”””real”””” women/man - also that they dont need to understand, i dont give a flying fuck if they dont get how someone can identify differently to their assigned gender/be nonbinary/have a gender that changes, just use the right pronouns and name and be ya’know a decent person - and! that they dont need to know what “makes” someone trans and that that line of thinking veers dangerously towards eugenics

30) Who is the transgender person who has influenced you the most?

ahhh good question - i realised i was trans in a pre Caitlyn Jenner pre Orange is the New Black era so a lot of it was just me figuring out shit on my own - which gotta say wasnt necessarily a bad thing bc more visibility has also lead to more bulshit

I would probably say Matt Sycamore - the first book i read that was edited by her was Why are Faggots so Afraid of Faggots and like the queer radicalism and like anarchy from that helped me figure out and voice some of my disquiet with queer assimilation stuff and also the big We Won the marriage campaign queer stuff is Done mood that was 2017 after Australia’s same sex marriage plebiscite. her book Nobody Passes which focuses purely on gender stuff also follows a similar vein and its very very good

35) How do you feel your gender interacts with your race, disability, class, weight, etc. from the perspective of intersectionality?

outside of queer stuff i fit into a pretty privileged life, defs gonna say class played a major noticeable role in being able to get hormones despite having to go through a whole court process (pretty sure the government being the Worst to baby me is what made me an anarchist) and get top surgery pretty quickly once out of high school, my whiteness also provides a certain protection when you see the much higher rates of violence at trans POC, and I'm also able to access queer events and spaces without having to consider accessibility etc

40) How did/do you manage waiting to transition?

mmmm honestly at the time it was the worst and looking back on it i am still very angry and bitter at both my school and, you know, the government in general

i did the whole im trans use the right name and pronouns @ the school people (with my parents there so they couldnt use that as an excuse) about nine months before they started doing so AND this was also after my parents flat out ignoring that I was trans for months before that and i did not uuhhh deal well with any of that mentally At All. my school was pretty much like yll be bullied we cant as if every kid i interacted with didnt already know - and when they eventually did it wasnt a big deal with kids - i only heard second hand about some shit that was said about me which gotta admit was kinda laughable bc i had people i barely knew tell me what people in my grade had said and i was like….dont know who that is but Okay - i was too out of the gossip loop to have anything to be upset about 😂 also i had two (2) teachers in the entire school that used the correct pronouns despite me fully out for near three years by the time i left school tho i didnt actually recognise how bad that was for me until i left high school and was like ???? dont want to die all the time ?? what is this

medically was also bulshit bc the australian system used to have anyone under 18 have to go through court to get HRT, it took me nearly three years and was incredibly fucked and even tho the laws been changed now i am still ready to throw down with whoever implemented it in the first place even tho their probably old and close to death themselves

ANYWAY in terms of providing a better answer than i didnt and was v sad and angry for a v long time - i surrounded myself with queer people, i ventured into the city for some youth queer groups, went to a camp purely for young queer people, read a lot of books about trans people etc 

Ask me questions ~

http://queeranarchist.tumblr.com/post/183686207345/datgenderqueerboi-trans-ask-game-what-has

#maddy #ask

[liberalbubbles]

i guess we're talking about english teachers again

i know this was my last topic i just have more thinks and i have no idea how long these should be.

ill get this out of the way now, we all know there are only two types of them, the amazing parental figure ones who you never want to leave and the crazy ones who have no idea they are talking to an audience of sentient beings.

my school has two main english teachers and those two each fall into one of the classic types but today im focusing on the good one. def my favorite teacher not just because he is the only teacher who likes me. as a super cool person with many pogs in the chat, its important to note that at a school with mostly youngish teachers, its not just the kids that care who is popular and thus here is i. strange gremlin child with strange gremlin friends and strange gremlin humor accented by strange gremlin mental illnesses making me an all around, strange gremlin. based on the stuff the cool kids think is funny, i am very ok with not being in their group but maybe being liked by a few teachers would be nice. enter stage left mr english teacher. a very cool dude who's job is to be a nerd meaning the gremlin children are actually the favorites and wow is there a difference in class when you like a teacher and they like you. the quality spike in ones schoolwork alone is the coolest thing ever. the most important lesson i took away from that class was to do all my work as if it wasn't for grumpy mrs math teacher or biased mr history teacher, i now pretend all my work is for someone who doesnt roll their eyes when they see my name on the class list but instead goes out of their way to make comments about the fun extra things you put in your work. i cant make my teachers like me but i can make myself more confident in my own work which is a pretty cool upgrade to my introverted software.

[comicteaparty]

August 9th, 2018 CTP Archive

The archive for the Comic Tea Party chat that occurred on August 9th, 2018, from 5PM - 7PM PDT.  The chat focused on Himawari Share by Harmony Becker.

Featured Comment:

Chat:

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

COMIC TEA PARTY START!

Good day everyone~! This week’s Comic Tea Party is now officially beginning~! Today we are discussing Himawari Share by Harmony Becker~! (https://tapas.io/series/Himawari-Share) For those new or in need of a reminder, discussions about the comic are freeform, so please feel free to bring up whatever you wish. However, every 30 minutes I will be dropping in a discussion question to help those who would like a prompt. These questions are totally OPTIONAL to answer, and you can pay them no mind if you wish. If you miss out on any though, they’ll be pinned for the duration of the chat once they’re posted~! Remember, constructive criticism is allowed, but the primary focus here is to have fun and appreciate the amazing comics that the community makes~! As a bonus, each chat a top comment will be picked and featured in the archives and on an ad for CTP! All that being said, let’s get started and have a great discussion!

QUESTION 1. What is your favorite scene in the comic so far and why?

snuffysam

It's really hard to pick, but I'd say the Hyejung-focused parts (chapters 5 & 6) were my favorites. Focusing on her studies, not knowing what she wants to be, tearing out her roots to move to Japan, getting homesick and feeling guilty for it.

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Hello!

snuffysam

like, emotions and stuff

also hello justin!

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

hey~!

yeah heyjung's backstory is a lot more tense than i was expecting. but i loved how everything was visually framed

although my favorite moment had to be when she went to that counselor and she just flat out couldnt say what she wanted to do with her life

cause man have i been there and that moment so purely relateable

snuffysam

yeah that was a big turning point, and my favorite moment in her backstory

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Thanks for the greeting~

I have to run a quick errand but I'll be back!

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

i also loved the aftermath though of all the others bringing her stuff for her hangover. like that was just sweet and heartwarming.

snuffysam

sweet and heartwarming seems to be the general theme

for example, the scene where tina brings nao a soda

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

yes. also a great scene. but also that scene made me like tina a whole lot. it had that element of goofiness (since she just picked her favorite) but had that immense kind-hearted underbelly. because i mean really, i dont know anyone who would bring me a soda to congratulate me on my first day of school.

i think my personal fave scene is actually when nao and masaki are walking together and each just having these thoughts about how they should interact and the various scenarios. especially nao imagining the music would bond them as friends while masaki is like "oh no i will be looked down upon for liking lady gaga."

snuffysam

and then they both end up too afraid to talk to each other lol

relatable scene, and i love how it helps build the characters of nao and masaki

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

yes. i also love that it shows a good side to masaki in that hes basically just an average, socially awkward dork who is probably having some language and cultural gap problems. since ya know, our first impression of him was just rudeness otherwise.

i want to say in general i really love this comic's pacing though. like i always feel like the emotions are given time to be showcased but dont drag on too overly much.

snuffysam

the pacing is a real strong suit of the comic, agreed

were we ever told what masaki and shinichi's nationality/native language was?

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

no albeit i assume for shinichi its japanese since he doesnt seem able to really do english and speaks quickly. which generally if youre a native, the quicker you speak. at the very least theyve gotta be fluent.

snuffysam

wait, i guess they aren't international students, because the comic description only says there are three

so they're just two japanese brothers who happen to live in the same house as three international students

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

yeah. for reasons O_O. although i am curious if anyone else lives there. cause nao asks tina who the curly haired guy was and tina was like "hmm maybe masaki" and then nao had to say rude for tina to be sure

so either this is just a writing goof or its implied more ppl live there?

snuffysam

yeah you'd think if it was only the five of them, "curly haired boy" would narrow it down quite a bit

also i think we ignored @Sa💅

hello Sa!

not really a scene per se, but i really like the way the comic scratches out words that aren't understood

like this page: https://tapas.io/episode/756155

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

ah i just thought it was a reply to the hellos. welcome @Sa💅 if you felt ignored O_O;;;

of all the things that is my fave part

cause i was skeptical on the language thing when i read the description

but man do i think it actually captures the language gap well

since it is what happens

you know lots of words but then theres always those difficult ones where youre like "omg wtf was that"

snuffysam

hamini really delivered in terms of showing how second languages work

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

i also selfishly enjoyed that nao and i are decently close in japanese language understanding cause i wound up reading a lot of the japanese she could understand.

but then kanji

always kanji everywhere all the time

snuffysam

i took a semester of japanese four years ago and flunked lol. i can get through "はい " and that's about it.

i'm a bit better with spoken, but not much

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

hey its something.

this reminds me, i really liked that scene where tina applied language knowledge to figure out vacuum

snuffysam

that was a really cool moment!

as were the rest of the parts where tina had to figure out the instructions given to her

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

yes. like man do i give tina all around props for that. i would have left crying cause new jobs are stressful enough without adding a language deficiency to the mix

QUESTION 2. Of those staying in Himawari Share, Shinichi and Masaki are the two we know least about in the current story. Do you think there’s any particular reason the two are staying at Himawari Share, or does it just happen to have a convenient location for them? Like the other characters, do you think they have personal histories or pasts that will come to light? Do you think that it is significant in some way that Shinichi and Masaki are mentioned to be brothers? As time goes on, do you think the others will bond with Masaki, or will the language and culture gap keep interfering? What about Shinichi? Will Nao, at least, become able to understand him better, or will his fast talking still prove too much?

i want to go out on a limb and just say theyre there cause convenient location. but i do think they got some sort of hidden past history. cause at the very least shinichi and masaki dont really look like theyre related. so it makes me wonder if this is maybe a half-sibling relationship going on

snuffysam

oh theory time?

i think they are actually brothers, they just happened to look different. that's how it goes somethimes

i think himawari share is a convenient location for them, but i have no idea what it would be convenient too. like, what are their jobs?

also, my guess - nao is going to start understanding what shinichi is saying, but at first it'll only be, like, she catches every other word.

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

yeah im confused at what the share is. cause the girls make it look like its like a special house dorm house for international students who are coming to work and learn in japan. but shinichi and masaki definitely dont appear to be international, so what are they doing there? now its possible they are also going to college in some fashion. but im not entirely sure since it still seems weird to have potentially two natives with three international students.

but to be fair, maybe they own himawari share

cause shinichi and masaki are def both first name

s

snuffysam

yeah maybe that's just their family home that they rent out

perhaps there are plenty of other people there, and the girls just don't hang out with them because they don't relate as much

international students sticking together and stuff

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

yeah that could also be. although the house seems in a residential area so there cant be too many

alternatively

theres only one other dude living there and hes a shut in that you see once in a blue moon

and theres gonna be some other festival and suddenly hell come out and nao will be le gasp

snuffysam

that sounds about right, yeah

and it would explain tina not knowing who nao was talking about

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

alternatively alternatively, it is just the 5 of them and tina just happens to know a lot of people who look like masaki and forgets who even lives with her

snuffysam

maybe masaki doesn't live there, he just really likes the bathroom

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

masaki lives never door but his bathroom broke and hes too lazy to fix it. comes over to his brother's place all the time.

i really hope we get to see more of shinichi cause of all the characters he seems the most one note atm. and idk what to make of him. although i do like that hes kind of like their tour guide who take sthem to festivals

snuffysam

i think it's just that the comic isn't particularly long yet and shinichi isn't one of the main characters

the description says romance is in the cards, but it doesn't say between whom

that may be where shinichi gets some development

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

it could be. and to be fair, shinichi's mystery kind of suits the fact that theres the language gap cause he clearly doesnt know english well or at all. so its hard to get to know someone well when theres only so many words shared between

like how that convo between nao and hyejung was really formal and stifled before they realized they both spoke english

snuffysam

well, hopefully shinichi is more open to talking about his interests than his brother

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

yeah. although backing up the train for a moment, id like to know why both brothers seemingly dont seem to know any english. cause english is generally required learning in japan and while a lot of ppl arent good at it, theyed probably at least know a few basic phrases. so it strikes me as interesting neither has attempted that much. tho tbf has masaki even said anything?

snuffysam

i think masaki corrected the neighbor lady about his name

but that's it

we don't know if they can speak english or not, i think

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

yeah i mean they could. but i could also see them choosing not to since the girls are all there to kind of learn japanese

snuffysam

oh no wait, there is a page where it's shown shinichi doesn't understand english

https://tapas.io/episode/839877

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

QUESTION 3. One of the comic’s themes revolves around finding yourself, and this issue has given many characters quite the obstacle. In the case of Nao, do you think she will come to terms with that missing part of herself by being in Japan, or will there forever be a gap no matter how much time she spends there? As Nao spends more time there, do you think she’ll feel the culture gap grow or shrink, and how might that affect her? In the case of Hyejung, do you think she’ll figure out what she wants to do with her life, or do you think that still might remain elusive? Additionally, do you think she’ll be able to reconcile with her family? Lastly, in the case of Tina, do you think her part time job will work out, or will the language gap make things too much of a struggle? If she does lose her job, what do you think she’ll do and how might this affect her reasons for being in Japan?

snuffysam

do we know why tina is in japan?

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

i dont think so. and if you dont think so, im gonna feel safe in saying we havent been told

although tina seems like the type to just like adventures

although whereas nao and hyejung give me the impression that they might someday go back to their home countries, tina gives me the impression that this is a permanent thing

at least compared to hyejung, tina seems to care the least about reliving her own culture persay

snuffysam

i think it's not going to turn out how any of the girls' plan. maybe hyuejung finds her purpose is back in korea, maybe it's in japan, etc.

nao is here to reconnect to the missing part of herself and re-learn japanese. while she may end up learning japanese, i don't think reconnecting with her past will happen so much.

she'll see a large culture gap, or get distracted with something else

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

I'm back!

snuffysam

hi justin!

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Hey Snuffy!

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

wb!

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Thanks!

Ooh, a Japanese festival?!

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

there was one in the comic, yes already, yes.

tbh i do think hyejung isnt going to find exactly what she wants. because i feel her desire to go to japan was driven more by a desire to escape her reality versus thinking "yes this is the place where i can find myself"

and shes the one who seems most homesick as well

not ot say i think the journey will be in vain

and i think shell at least learn things about herself

like how to live independently for herself

away from the parents

in nao's case, i think shell...come to terms that she cant have a different past. im actually thinking whats going to happen is shes going to run into something that makes her go "whoa wait america was way better in this aspect" and then shell realize that if she had stayed in japan, she also wouldnt know the american culture she grew up in.

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Perhaps

snuffysam

at some point nao likened it to having a twin that was separated from her at birth. and i think her journey will involve coming to terms with the fact that she can't recover that lost twin. she's gone forever.

lots of great metaphors in this comic btw

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

I thought Nao was from Korea.

snuffysam

no you're thinking of hyejung

nao is the one who was born in japan but grew up in america

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Oh right, my bad I saw this page and I thought wrong because of it https://tapas.io/episode/1021922

snuffysam

yeah that chapter follows hyejung

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

aye, thanks

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

yeah i do think thats the case with nao. shes going to have to realize that she cant have two pasts or that other half. but i do think being in japan will be both good and bad for it. cause on the plus side, she gets to see what she missed out on, but on the otherhand shes also going to feel the sting of that gap cause im sure shes gonna run into a festival where shes plain just like "i dont understand this"

although assuming her mom is still alive(?) then itll be interesting if she can talk to her mom in japanese again or something

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Yeah.

You know, reading this comic made me remember how much I thought it'd be cool to visit Japan back in high school and planned to go there as a graduation present. How wrong I was.

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

this comic gives me the should go to japan itch again. especially to eat the food

which im glad food is involved a lot

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Mmm

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

cause thats a huge facet of the culture

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

I wish I loved Japanese food.

more than I do now

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

on a side note

i loved that little moment where hyejung bitched that the kimchi wasnt even spicy

and how it was made by a japanese run restaurant

cause i liked that detail that just how america amercanizes certain foods, other countries do the same

or at least japan does for sure XD

their mcdonalds are crazy

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

lol yeah

This hit home for me, in a way

like it's not "authentic"

snuffysam

I’ve had Korean food in a restaurant owned by Korean people. And yeah, it’s a lot spicier

I don’t blame Hyejung lol

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

nah i dont blame her either. cause regardless if you grow up used to one flavor, you probably arent gonna be a fan of change

QUESTION 4. Given the focus of the comic is on international students and cultural gaps, to a degree, there are lots of interesting potential scenarios. Did you find the comic’s unique method of showcasing language gaps interesting? How did it change how you viewed the characters’ experiences? Are there any cultural experiences that you’re looking forward to seeing the characters experience? If so, why? Do you feel our heroines will continue to be able to wing it, or will they commit some sort of cultural blunder? If the latter, how do you expect that to play out and emotionally affect the culprit? On a more character oriented level, what other struggles do you think the characters might have in their everyday, personal lives? Do you think everyone will continue to get along, or might tension in Himawari Share grow for some reason? Lastly, do you think romance might be in bloom with any characters?

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

It's certainly very interesting and it shows up the potential troubles of going out into a whole new world

snuffysam

Everyone gets along so well, I just know someone’s going to mess up

Call me a pessimist lol

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

lol

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

snuffy, youre a pessimist

but no i agree

they have been getting along real well

and at some point theyre going to fight

cause at the very least living together isnt easy

cause everyone has different habits

and call me biased, but pretty sure if its a living together thing tina is gonna be the cause of it just cause she has the most unreserved personality

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Yeah.

Eventually all that rage and stress will just need to be all let out.

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

one thing i didnt mention about the language thing was that i was glad to see there was a difference between nao and tina. cause tina clearly has a better grasp and that shows, both in how much she understands and how she has learned to learn via context clues.

snuffysam

yeah there's a clear difference between everyone's skill level

even just the "yeah it took me a while to get used to shinichi talking" is an example of that

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

It's great seeing everyone talking in all the different languages(edited)

Especially since it's not easy to do Japanese and Korean in comics unless you're overly familiar with the language yourself (or have a translator)(edited)

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

yes thats also true with the shinichi talking part. i really felt for nao in that moment.

cause its an easier said than done thing

im gonna ship nao and masaki. thats where im putting my shipping chips

snuffysam

perhaps a source of conflict comes from romance coming about with an odd number of people in the house?

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

I made it for the last bit. O.o Though you mentioned a lot of the stuff I liked in the first half hour already, I'm noticing. The bit where Tina brought the soda for Nao and the bit where the two characters were having different music conversations in their minds.

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

eey Math

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

I enjoyed those two. The Hyejung at the end, I can see how it's very relatable, and it was emotional, but I guess I just like a bit of funzies in my fave scenes. ^.^(edited)

I'm gonna ship Nao and Tina, because you KNOW me.

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

hi math~! was even just thinking "aww i guess math isnt coming after all."

plz math

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

mmm, ships

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

clearly tina and hyejung are the ship

they have more history

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

That's just it, they haven't fallen in love yet. Chips go on the new relationship.

Also, related to what SJ was saying before, the author must be very good with languages or know many herself... I have zero clue if it's right or not, but it's a pretty gutsy venture.

snuffysam

yeah either the author knows three plus languages, or has some really good friends

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

the japanese is correct from what i can tell. at least the parts i could read.

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

There's also those little things that can trip one up in translation, like the "Let's Eat" kind of being the Japanese thanks for the food thing. I think the author even pointed it out once, with the part time job, both of them thanking the other for working, not really being an English thing.

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Yeah, I wouldn't ever think to do a foreign language in something of mine unless I rely on a translator.

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

I didn't totally pick up on the skills of the individual characters either, but since you did, it's cool that it can come across too.

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Yea

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

I'm bilingual for English and French and even I'm not sure I'd want to do it.

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

what you mean you dont want to do a strip where all the tans start speaking french? XD

i feel like shinichi would be the one to bring a relationship in from the outside

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Not so much, no.

Yeah, we haven't seen much of the guys (which I notice you mentioned earlier)... honestly, I'm okay with that. I like the focus on the women (and not just because I ship that way) as they all have sort of a bond.

snuffysam

shinichi seems a bit more outgoing, so i wouldn't be surprised if he turns out to already be in a relationship

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Oh, and the speed-talking thing was well portrayed.

I also want to say it was neat having that character who lives across the street come back in a later scene, when they were going to the post office. Helps make things extra real, incidentals like that.

snuffysam

i liked how she didn't know masaki's name lol

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

Lol

snuffysam

he might not get out much

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Could be to avoid talking. And just not wanting to talk even to strangers for fear of making a mistake.

Maybe that explains the rudeness too.

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

to be fair, i dont know a single one of my neighbors. and if you dont interact with your neighbors, you dont know their names

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

If you start with rudeness, people won't talk to you either, and you won't have to interpret. Yeah, I don't know my neighbours either. ^^;;

Superjustingo of ✨Time🕑&Space☄✨

I don't even have any neghibors

MathTans the super Pun 👑Prince👑

Final thought, super impressed by the translation stuff. Including the blurring of just some words, which was also pointed out earlier. I don't think I've seen anything like that.

Also, Nao + Tina.

✨🐱 RebelVampire 🐱✨

COMIC TEA PARTY END!

Unfortunately, the scheduled Comic Tea Party time is now up~! Thank you everyone so much for reading and joining this week’s chat~! We want to give a special thank you to Harmony Becker, as well, for making Himawari Share and volunteering it for our reading queue. If you liked the comic, please be sure to support Harmony Becker’s efforts however you’re able to. All that being said, if you would like to continue discussing this week’s comic, we highly encourage you to do so~!

For next week, Comic Tea Party will focus on Raison d'Etre by Cloud Fourteen (Funari and Leigh). As always, please use the next several days to read as much of the comic as you would like. We hope to see you next Thursday on August 16th from 5PM to 7PM PDT for the chat~! Until then, happy reading~! Comic: http://raisondetrecomic.tumblr.com/

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