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matan4il · 3 years

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Hello! I wanted to tell you that I love the posts you make and how you appreciate every detail of Buddie that I haven´t noticed. I wanted to ask you, do you think Buk already has feelings for Eddie? Maybe it´s a feeling of mine, but this season I see Buck sad in general. Could he be affected by spending less time with Eddie and Chris because of Ana? I think they have put Ana in the moments when they were Buck and Eddie (and Chris). Thank you very much and sorry for my English.

Hello and thank you so much, this is incredibly sweet of you! I hope it’s ok to send a hug! I’m really happy you enjoy my meta posts... Also, your English is absolutely awesome and you rock for speaking a foreign language! Never apologize for it, lovely. *hugs*

As for Buck, I do believe he already has feelings for Eddie, though I tend to think he’s not consciously aware of their nature. That he just classifies them as thinking that Eddie is amazing and hot and he wants to spend as much time with Eddie as he can and he cares about Eddie so much... without connecting all the dots and realizing this is more intense than just regular friendship. I have to emphasize: this is just my take based on canon, on how fully he’s immersed himself in the life of Eddie and Ana. Which is in part why I can’t believe they’re not all still hanging out together. Maybe less often, def off screen, but the supermarket argument pretty much established that these three want and need to be together. Ep 408 also reassured us that Buck’s importance not just to Eddie but to Chris as well hasn’t changed. I think it’s not been said explicitly, that they still hang out, and we haven’t seen it in the eps, which is why we feel this absence, but 911 has in the past hinted that Buddie hang out and share a lot more than what is shown on screen, so based on everything we know of them, I have to believe this is still true for them.

Buck has been sadder this season, but I think is starts before Ana came back. He’s getting to articulate that he does want a relationship again, after denying it in 312, following what he saw with Red back in ep 316, then going through the whole Daniel reveal and fallout. But hey, maybe whatever happens in the finale will remind him that we’ve seen him at he’s happiest when he’s with Eddie and Chris, so maybe that’ll help him move in that direction. ;) I hope I helped? Please don’t hesitate to let me know! xoxox

(more under the cut)

Hi Alice! Your recent asks have me wondering about Taylor. Do you think the friendship episode was supposed to be something of a mini redemption arc for Taylor? 🤨 it’s interesting to me how, despite Buck’s close relationship with Bobby, we’ve never really heard how he felt about her terrible intentions in her first appearance (unless we did and I forgot?). It seems everyone sees the error in her ways except for Buck and I dislike how that whole thing has been swept under the rug for many viewers who’ve become captivated by her sassiness. Maybe I’m being harsh, but personally, I don’t feel that being sad about covid is enough to erase her cruel intentions, whether she’s a career-driven independent woman or not. Do you think the show will ever address her past directly? I know she hasn’t had too much screen time overall and in my opinion I’d rather it stay that way (because I don’t want her to be endgame and I feel absolutely starved for screentime with our mains! There’s too many characters now lol). If you get around to this ask, then thank you so much!! 🥰

Hi Nonnie, of course I’ll reply to your ask! If I ever don’t, I either haven’t had a chance to answer my recent asks yet, or I didn’t get it. Never hesitate to check in with me if I don’t! *hugs*

I actually have used the words ‘mini redemption arc’ myself when talking about Taylor. It’s not the most classic redemption arc, those usually entail the antagonist facing what they’ve done wrong and directly making up for it or indirectly doing so by making some meaningful sacrifice/proving themselves to have learned and changed in a big crisis.

Taylor didn’t get exactly that. I think the show didn’t wanna bring up what she did wrong in 206 and kind of brushed it aside in 208 already (when Buck sleeps with her despite how much he cares about Bobby and when Buck mentions her to Bobby, who doesn’t say anything in particular about what she had done to him... though we don’t know if Bobby is aware that she was gonna air her piece about him). Back then, the show didn’t need to redeem her anyway, she was still an antagonist. In s4, I do think she got something close to it, because the show doesn’t want us to think of her as an antagonist anymore. So if in s2 her career came before everything, including Buck and possibly a human life (Bobby’s), in s4 she’s shown to now care about saving lives and justice, about Buck, and her job is no longer her main priority.

I hope the show does re-visit what she did, but right now, I tend to think it won’t. They’ve had two eps since her return this season to address the stuff from 206, but they haven’t touched any of it other than indirectly, by showing us she’s changed. It may be to make it easier for us to side with her if Bobby confronts her about those things at some point, but the way they haven’t shown him saying anything about that in 208 or in 408, when Bobby and Taylor were both present at the same call... I’m sorry, Nonnie, I hate to feel like I’m disappointing you. If it helps, I don’t think she’s endgame, as I mentioned in my 411 meta and I’ll delve a bit into why in my next reply... Hope it’ll make it better! xoxox

Not an ask but! I kind of like how they are developing Taylor right now. I really really disliked her in the beginng, partly bc of her character partly bc she was Buck's LI. But now i really don't mind her being here. At least for a while. I dont at all think that she and her are engame but she might stick around longer than Ana bc she's definitely a more interesting character and her and Buck's relationship is also way more fleshed out than Eddie's and Ana's is

Hi Nonnie, It’s a great ask even without including a question. ;) Thank you for sending it!

I agree that she and Buck aren’t endgame, and that she has more potential than Ana and I can see Taylor being around for longer, too! To expand on the endgame angle, as I mentioned in my 411 meta, I feel like a big question in fandom right now is whether Buck and Taylor will get together romantically. I currently tend to think they will at some point. Beyond something I had mentioned to @yelenabelous (that men and women with a past are never treated as fully platonic on TV), there’s also the indicators of character investment and integration.

Because Taylor and her relationship with Buck ARE more fleshed out than Ana and her r/s with Eddie, but they’re still not at the level of making her a character in her own right on 911. She’s still there as a satellite of Buck’s. Yes, we have a much greater sense of her personality than Ana’s, and yes, with one appearance less than Ana, the show has already invested more in telling us about Taylor, who she is and how she’s changed since s2. But how much do we know about her? Other than her dreams from a young age regarding her career and her history with Buck, not much. What are her likes and dislikes outside of work? What’s her romantic past like, has she dated seriously before and got burnt or will dating Buck be a totally new experience for her? How about her family, does she have any, is she in touch with them? And other than in 206, everything scene she’s been in has revolved around Buck. She also hasn’t been integrated into the larger ensemble. Think of Albert, for comparison, who has ties to several people from the team and who has hung out with the 118 a few times on screen. He’s a character in his own right and as such, he’s a long term one.

Ep 411 could have used Buck and Taylor teaming up on a case to allow him to get to know her better (as we saw with Buck and Abby when searching for her mom in 103), but the show didn’t go there. We also could have seen more of an interaction between Taylor and Athena (along the lines of Maddie and Athena getting to know each other in 205), but we didn’t get that either.

It feels like just enough development to make her an interesting LI, not enough for her to become a long term LI who will be Buck’s endgame. That might change at some point and we’ll also have to see how she’s treated in 412, if they’ll raise the levels of investment and integration when it comes to her. But yeah, this is why I’m currently thinking Buck and Taylor will get involved as more than friends at some point, but they won’t be endgame.

At what point? Looking mainly at the pace of things (so I’m going off almost nothing, which means I am warning you to not take this as anything other than conjecture), I would find it interesting if they did a contrasting parallel, where Eddie and Ana, who’ve been calmly sailing along as a couple through most of the season, will hit a rough patch towards the end of it, while Buck and Taylor, who are doing the ‘just friends’ things will get together at roughly the same time.

But again I’ll stress, much like Jon Snow, I know nothing. ;) I hope this was still helpful in some capacity! xoxox

I was so inarticulate in my last flirting ask 😭. Thank you for answering. I meant more like the casual touching is less (like no tailpipe rescue), not no touching or no flirting. But like in the *kitchen scene* if they'd touched it would have been done. Like they're careful to keep the casual touching flirting minimized. And my little pining heart is hoping we'll see how it's just not right with who they're with now... and then one of them whump and they'll be like, we shouldn't have waited.

Oh no, Nonnie, you’re great and your ask is fine! Sorry if I missed what you meant! *hugs* Please don’t be too upset due to me being thick! And OMG, yes. The kitchen scene was so charged already, actual physical touch would have made them (and our TV screen, lbr) spontaneously combust! And God yes, I would love the scenario that you described SO MUCH. They and we deserve all the epic pining that will finally explode because they can’t contain themselves anymore and the very touching of their hands sends sparks flying! Thank you for this follow up ask and big hugs to you! xoxox

#anghy11850 #buddie #buddie meta #911 meta #911meta #9-1-1 #evan buck buckley #evan buckley #eddie diaz #edmundo diaz #ask #anon ask #ana flores #taylor kelly #fandom love #kindness #911 on abc #911abc #911 abc

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deluweil · 3 years

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4x14 review - don’t read if you haven’t watched

I’ve been trying to write the review on and off the entire day, but the truth is that there are too many details and I sure as hell can’t go over all of it in one post so here’s my initial one and the rest will come in bursts later.

First off I want to start by saying that I’m glad that Maddie told Chimney, she looked so miserable, and she loves Jee-Yun so much, she was so happy to have her and the fact that PPD can creep up on a new mother and mess with her head like this is so horrible. 😭😭

I truly hope that she and Chimney will be able to overcome it and enjoy (read exhaustingly but happily) raising Jee-Yun. I have to complement both JLH and Kenneth both did their parts so well. I absolutely love them together! ❤❤

Second (and I know it’s at the end but I’m too excited) I was so happy to see Nia!! 😍😍😍 I had the stupidest smile on face that wouldn’t go away, and now that they met by chance Hen and Karen can be part of Nia’s life too, make a new friend and Nia will be able to see her Denny regularly. It was a perfect scene! 👏💕

Third, I’m glad Athena and Bobby managed to finally sit down and talk about the attack from 3x17. It starts with both apologizing which is good, I’m curious to see how it would have played out if Eddie hadn’t been shot. 🤔

But that was such a sweet and heartfelt long overdue conversation, I absolutely adore bathena and I would have been a wreck if they broke them up!

Bobby telling Athena: ”There’s this thing people say, ‘I don’t know what I’d do without you.’ Because losing someone you love is such an alien concept you don’t want to imagine what it’s like. I was sitting in that engine thinking I was listening to you dying and I didn’t need to imagine anything, I knew what my life feel like without you in it, and it scared me.” - It was something that held true in this episode for both bathena and buddie, and it was completely heartbreaking. 🥺🥺

Bobby finally coming to terms with what happened and Athena going back to work, once she explained why she kept it from him. And both say the name of the episode as is apparently now tradition lol “Survivors” - and they really are.

I love how Athena talks Buck into helping her get into the building, even though it was a ‘help me save your dad’ moment for a lot of people, in my eyes she is appealing to the Buck who just nearly lost Eddie, begging him to help her not to lose her husband.

Buck is reluctant at first because he knows how much Bobby loves Athena and wouldn’t want her to risk her life like this, but Buck has been on Athena’s side very recently and understands Athena’s pressing urge to go in for her husband.

Buck wanting to go in with her was expected, Athena’s insistence that she will not be able to protect him in there was expected too, she is going to save her husband but she wants her chaos child to be safe outside. I loved the Buck and Athena’s interaction here. 🤗🤗

“I got you.” Was said by two people in this episode, and in both cases it was to the most important person in their lives. 😭❤ (I meant adult partners, don’t give me the ‘but they have kids’ - kids always come first, it’s different.)

“I didn’t imagine that part right? you actually walked through fire.” Bobby was so cute asking that, it sounded half teasing - something similar to “You like me”. 😉

But Athena’s answer was serious, “Well, you were inside, I wasn’t going a little fire to stop me, I needed my partner back.” 🥺❤

We got a call back to 4x02 - only the roles were reversed now:

Bobby telling Athena, “Thank you for coming to get me.”

And she promises, “Always.” It was sweet, and moving.

Have I mentioned how much I love them???

A little side-note - Athena telling Bobby that she wasn’t going to let a fire stop her from getting her partner back - is paralleled here, in my opinion to Buck actually going through gunfire to get to Eddie - to get his partner back.

Athena never walked through actual fire, the firefighters deal with, before.

This was Buck’s first time operating under sniper’s fire - something Eddie has experience with. (”At least no one is shooting at us.”)

They both committed this extraordinary acts to get their PARTNERS back!!

Fourth and last for this post, Congratulations firefighter Albert Han - tell the truth, we all saw this coming from day one, when Albert was fangirling over his brother the life-saver and Chimney was trying to be rid of him lol.

I’m happy for him - I really like John too, I’m happy he’s sticking around.

Now, I know you’re missing my buddie part of the review - but it is so long - it’s getting it’s own post this time. 🙃

Overall it was a good episode, we got a mostly good story told here, I do however take issue with the time-jump. 🤦‍♀️

I mean what is that? Sorry too much actual, emotional, vital stories can be written here, but you know us male writers, we’re not good at this so we’ll just time-jump to where we can screw with you in other ways and leave you wondering about what actually went down in the time elapsed.

I will say this, however, this isn’t a monster of the week kind of show, emotional baggage and trauma doesn’t just disappear. And though I am concerned that we will not see the emotional fallout of Buck and Eddie’s shared trauma and the fact that they heal together this time, I’m talking about Maddie - showing her like this and then just give us an ‘oh, it was fixed when you looked away and she’s good now’ excuse, that will not be tolerated! - this storyline deserve a proper process and resolution.

Hope you enjoyed this post, buddie post will come up soon. 👀💜

#9-1-1 4x14 #9-1-1 episode review #118 firefam #bathena #madney #albert han #buddie #henren #nia wilson #buddie and bathena parallels #9 1 1 spoilers

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ecoamerica · 2 months

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bbclesmis · 5 years

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Lily Collins on overshadowing dad Phil, beating anorexia and starring in the BBC's Les Misérables

As one of the defining voices of the 1980s and a man who remains one of the world’s bestselling artists, it would have been easy for Collins to overshadow his multitalented daughter’s success. Certainly, when I first interviewed Lily five years ago for the romcom Love, Rosie, she was still being defined not just by her famous father, but the Audrey Hepburn-esque looks that had won her modelling contracts as a teenager living in LA.

Since we last saw each other, Lily has redefined herself on her own terms. And when UK audiences are treated to her nuanced, poignant portrayal of Cosette’s desperate mother, Fantine, in the lavish new six-part BBC adaptation of Victor Hugo’s Les Misérables, they won’t see Phil Collins’s daughter but a remarkable British-born talent at the top of her game.

‘I had a few friends in the musical version, and I was so keen to play this part in what’s a very different adaptation,’ says Lily of the role that won Anne Hathaway an Oscar – a role she begged producers to be allowed to audition for, so desperate was she to be involved.

That the director, Tom Shankland, had decided against his being a musical adaptation meant the all-star cast – including Dominic West as Jean Valjean, David Oyelowo as Javert and Olivia Colman as Madame Thénardier – were able to return to Hugo’s original characters, she says. ‘And getting to work through the whole arc of Fantine’s life was incredible. Although in fact the death scene was filmed on day two,’ she adds with a side smile. ‘So it was a case of, “Hi, nice to meet you – I’m about to die”.’

Crushed and betrayed by a pitiless society that demands the most from those to whom it gives the least, Fantine’s character is emblematic of so much. During the six-month shoot in Belgium and northern France, Lily found filming in minus-13C Brussels gruelling (‘I grew up in England, so I should know about cold – but this was something else’), but says it helped put her in the right state of mind.

‘My lips started to go blue and I began to shake. Even in my breaks I wouldn’t keep my jacket on for too long because I had to be at a level of discomfort that I hadn’t experienced before.’ And when a degraded and desperate Fantine is dragged through the snow wearing minimal clothing, ‘I was able to let go and be that vulnerable. It’s those parts that are the most fulfilling: that’s when you can see what you’re made of.’

Lily’s early roles were hardly inconsequential. She starred alongside Sandra Bullock in the Oscar-winning 2009 film The Blind Side, and with Julia Roberts in Mirror Mirror in 2012. But it wasn’t until 2013 with her portrayal of Clary Fray in the film adaptation of Cassandra Clare’s bestselling cult fantasy series The Mortal Instruments that Lily seemed to come into her own.

There was a concerted move towards tragic, multi-layered heroines like heartbroken Cecilia Brady in Amazon Prime’s The Last Tycoon in 2016, and recovering anorexic Ellen in Marti Noxon’s To the Bone the following year, and I wonder whether it was the writing of her startlingly honest 2017 memoir, Unfiltered: No Shame, No Regrets, Just Me, that marked the start of Lily’s real evolution.

Five years ago a sweet, wholesome and reticent young woman in dungarees and Dr Martens boots had assured me that prudence had ‘always been my natural feeling’. And yet, outing herself as someone real and flawed in her memoir – someone who had suffered from a debilitating eating disorder as well as self-confidence and relationship issues – was anything but prudent. ‘Writing the book helped me let go of things I was holding on to emotionally,’ Lily says. ‘And in order to take on the baggage of the characters that I wanted to play I had to let go of my own.’

That she chose to play a recovering anorexic in To the Bone the same year she’d detailed her own illness in such detail – the diet-pill and laxative addiction, the bingeing and purging that started at the age of 16 and went on into her 20s – could be seen as brave, foolhardy or both. But her parents (Lily’s mum is American socialite Jill Tavelman) didn’t try to stop her, she says. ‘In fact, they were more like, “Wow, you’re writing a book!” And it turned out to be a form of therapy,’ she insists.

‘Luckily, we shot To the Bone in LA, I worked with a nutritionist to prepare for the part responsibly, and my mum was on set with me, so it was a way for me to harness something that had truly controlled my life for such a long time. Being able to turn the tables and really have control was amazing. Finally I could say to myself: “I am living my life and this is not going to be a part of my story from now on.” I’ll be 30 in March and I’m so glad that I dealt with these things in my 20s, because now I can get excited about what’s to come.’

As part of her research she went to an Anorexics and Bulimics Anonymous group, and an LA clinic for eating disorders, ‘where they gave me a lot of the factual information to understand the basics of the disorder’. Does she feel her illness is firmly behind her now – or is it important to remain vigilant? ‘Well it’s never going to be erased because it’s part of who you are, but it doesn’t define how I live my life daily any more,’ she says. ‘When I was going through it, I couldn’t imagine there being a day when I didn’t think about it. So really it’s about seeing myself as a priority.’

She’s in no doubt that doing To the Bone and Unfiltered in the same year was worth it in terms of getting the message out there. ‘We’re all flawed,’ she shrugs. ‘Giving a loud voice to a subject that people are often very ashamed of really inspired me to pour myself into characters that have something to say.’

Her accent may be pure La-La Land, but Lily’s got British steel, our madcap sense of humour – and a love of Topshop. And when she lands at Heathrow and drives out into the country towards her father’s Surrey home, ‘That’s when I feel most myself,’ she says. And yet only-child Lily was just five when her mother moved them back to California, where she was from, and away from the very public fallout of her and Collins’s divorce.

It was the musician’s second marital break-up and the press feasted on every acrimonious detail of the split, from the fax her father reportedly sent Tavelman terminating their 10-year marriage (he denied it) to the reported £17 million he was forced to pay out. But although Lily admits in her book that there was ‘anger’ towards her father and a ‘terrible disconnect’ between them in the subsequent period – Collins went on to marry Swiss translator Orianne Cevey, 20 years his junior, in 1999, whom he later divorced and remarried – she is now very close to the 67-year-old and her four half-siblings. Two of them, Simon and Joely (whose mother is Collins’s first wife, Andrea Bertorelli) live in Canada, and two, Nicholas and Matthew (sons of Orianne), in Geneva, but the family all assembled in London for their father’s 60th birthday.

Lily remembers the advice Phil gave her when she started out: ‘For every positive review you read you’ll probably find two negative ones, so if you’re proud of something, don’t let anyone take that away.

‘And it’s true that being proud of the work matters more than anything,’ she says, adding that growing up immersed in the industry allowed her to ‘see the pros and the cons of it all and really understand what happens when you decide you’re going to be in the public eye. Because of that I feel like I already have this armour built in, which I can use at any moment.’

The armour went on when I asked about her ex-boyfriend, actor Jamie Campbell Bower, and an alleged fling with Zac Efron five years ago – and she’s not about to tell me who she’s dating now. But as well as her book, Instagram – on which Lily has almost 12 million followers – has opened her up in other ways. ‘I used to be quite anti social media,’ she says. ‘But after the book I found that this hugely supportive community was forming around the world.’ Anyone who assumed that the gorgeous LA actress whose circle of friends includes the actors Eddie Redmayne, Jaime Winstone and Sam Claflin couldn’t connect with ordinary people, ‘I wanted to prove wrong,’ she says.

Instagram has also proved to be a great platform for Lily to showcase her love of fashion and photography. The Dr Martens are now long gone and today she loves mixing up pieces by Givenchy, Miu Miu and Chanel with vintage brands and high-street finds. ‘In Brussels there were so many amazing vintage shops,’ she says. ‘I found some incredible old adidas and Fila jackets. But I’m constantly changing when it comes to fashion.’

Many of these experiments have been exhaustively covered by the fashion bloggers who dissect paparazzi pictures of Lily out and about in LA, where she lives – ‘which can be frustrating when I’m just going to the gym’, but is an inevitable part of any coverage involving red carpets.

Asked whether she minds the ‘Who are you wearing?’ question that many A-listers have railed against post #AskHerMore, she deliberates for a moment. ‘Well, I like to give credit where credit’s due, and if I’m wearing something a designer has created, they deserve the credit. One hopes there’s going to be more than one question – and if it is just the one, I’d rather be asked what I’m doing there.’

To see how quickly her industry has changed since #MeToo went viral just over a year ago has been fascinating, she says. ‘And I feel very fortunate that the films I’ve been in have always involved very strong independent women – whether it’s Julia Roberts, Sandra Bullock,Julianne Moore, Annette Bening or Jennifer Connelly: they all took me under their wing.’

Watching #MeToo filter down into other industries has been one of the most wondrous things about it, she enthuses. ‘But whereas this year has been about trying to level the playing field, I keep hoping that one day we won’t have to start conversations with, “Well, it’s great because she’s a woman…”’

In her next big screen role, Lily will star as Edith Tolkien – the wife and muse of Lord of the Rings creator JRR Tolkien – opposite Nicholas Hoult in Dome Karukoski’s biopic, Tolkien. ‘And what an amazing experience to shoot in Liverpool with someone like Nicholas, and be able to play a character that really inspired a series of stories I grew up loving.’ But prior to that, and also due out next year – she filmed Joe Berlinger’s Extremely Wicked, Shockingly Evil and Vile, in which she plays the long-term girlfriend of mass-murderer Ted Bundy, Elizabeth Kloepfer – with whom she spent time.

‘The preparation to that – and meeting Elizabeth and her daughter – was so unsettling that I kept being woken up by all these images,’ she says. ‘And I had tried not to read the harshest and most visceral information out there because in truth my character didn’t know anything, and the story is from her perspective. But it’s such a fascinating story – and in the end storytelling is what connects us all.’

Les Misérables begins on 30 December at 9pm on BBC One (x)

#les mis bbc #bbc les mis #Lily Collins #fantine #Interviews #articles

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sinsiriuslyemo · 6 years

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Halloween is upon us!! I love these two so so much and with the last few weeks I’ve been having, I needed these two to brighten my life. Thank you guys so much for reading and commenting/reblogging. It means the world that you’re enjoying Rabastian as much as I am <3

tagged: @bullet-prooflove, @delia26, @ghostofachancewithyou, @whiterose2664, @blown-transistor, @esparza-army, @mikeydodds, @southern-magnolia

7. Halloween

Rafael sighed exasperatedly as he finally made it into his office, carelessly laying his briefcase on top of his desk. The last week had been nothing short of hell on earth; SVU had picked up Eddie on suspicion of rape, and the pandora’s box that had opened thereafter had left him feeling betrayed all over again.

The fallout from it all had only begun it seemed and judging by the vast amount of press that was outside Hogan Place waiting for him, it didn’t seem to be slowing down any time soon either. Alex had somehow topped himself by claiming that Rafael and a few choice others were setting him up to keep him from winning the election. It certainly didn’t take long for a leak from wherever to tip off reporters that Rafael and Alex had a history, which of course was followed by the insinuation that the timeliness of the information SVU had dug up was some kind of payback for something that had happened over twenty years ago.

As if Alex throwing both he and Eddie under the bus in order to try to save himself wasn’t enough, Yelina had turned her back on him, too.

The best parts of his days had been Sebastian’s company every morning and every night. Had it not been for the fact that he started and ended his day in such a peaceful presence, Rafael might’ve been in much worse shape.

Taking a long sip from his coffee, he settled into his seat just as a knock sounded from the door to his office. For a moment, he thought it could be the DA and he felt the muscles on his shoulders tighten as he placed his cup on his desk and slowly sat up.

“Come in,” he called out, letting out a silent breath when Liv walked in. “I suppose there’s very little chance that you’re here to deliver good news.”

“Relax, I just came to see how you were doing,” she answered with a disarming smile.

“I’ve been better,” he replied, bobbing his shoulders as he took up his coffee again.

She narrowed her eyes at him. “He was your friend--”

“--He was a lot of other things, too,” Rafael mumbled.

Despite the fact that he’d opened up to her when Eddie was first brought in, Rafael was still weary of forming a bond closer to friends than colleagues with Olivia. Part of the reason he’d had such an incredible record at the Brooklyn DA’s office had been due to his strict boundaries with the detectives that he worked with. His intentions when he’d moved to SVU in Manhattan was to keep the same boundaries in place. Up until the week before, it had worked perfectly, but after Eddie’s arrest, Rafael had needed to unload and Olivia had been a sympathetic ear. Still, he was cautious of letting it go any further than one colleague taking consideration with another.

She looked about to say something else, but seemed to think better of it and lowered her eyes.

If he were being honest, he didn’t really want to speak anymore on what had happened and he instead tried to think about his breakfast with Sebastian earlier that morning since it had been the best thing about the day thus far.

“Actually, I’m glad you stopped by. I was hoping I might ask for a favor.”

She arched a brow. “Name it.”

“Could you look into an old case for me?” he asked carefully.

“How old are we talking?”

“25 years..?” he replied.

“You thinking it might be tied to a current case?” she asked.

“No, this would be more a personal favor,” he answered.

She seemed somewhat pleased with his answer, one corner of her mouth quirking upward as her brow knitted. “Okay. You know the case number?”

“No...but I do have a name, Delilah Everette. She was shot on her way home from work,” he replied.

“Do you know where?”

He shook his head.

“I can run her name, see what shakes loose. Was it someone you knew?”

“Not exactly,” he said. She seemed to want him to say more and he cleared his throat as his fingers gently twisted his coffee cup on top of his desk.

“Barba, seriously? What’s with the cloak and dagger?” she asked playfully.

He sighed softly, eying the open door for a moment before he went and closed it and looked back at her. “I met someone.”

She looked surprised and for a moment, he was almost offended.

“You don’t have to look so surprised,” he quipped.

“I guess I just assumed you lived at the office,” she teased. “Is this...Delilah Everette, is it a relative?”

“Yes. The police never caught the man responsible. I thought maybe you could take a look, maybe find something the original investigators missed.”

“Yeah, I could try,” she replied, nodding her head.

“Thank you.”

“Sure,” she said, sliding her hands into her front pockets as she gave him a polite smile. “You know...after last week, everything you told me about Eddie and...and Alex and Yelina...I thought maybe our relationship had developed a little. It almost felt like...”

He knitted his brows, and even though he knew what she might’ve said, he still asked, “What?”

“Like we were friends,” she said, brown eyes trained on his green. “You don’t strike me as the kind of man who makes friends often, not because he can’t make any but because he won’t let himself be vulnerable to most people. I think you made an exception for me last week because you needed someone to understand, someone to be your friend. I was happy to be that for you because you’ve always been that for me and I just want you to know that I don’t take your trust lightly. You can talk to me.”

The corner of his mouth quirked upward briefly as he nodded once. He hadn’t expected for Olivia to be so intuned with him and realized that it was likely due to the fact that whether he had realized it sooner or not, they were in fact friends. And unlike Alex Muñoz, Rafael knew in his heart that Liv would never betray his trust. He couldn’t have explained the feeling if he tried and his cynical nature nagged at him that he needed to be careful to not confide too much in the detective despite his intuitions telling him that she had his back.

“Thank you,” he said.

Olivia nodded back. “I’ll look for Delilah Everette’s casefile and let you know if I find anything.”

“I appreciate it.” She began to walk to the door and he reached out to brush his fingers over the material of her sleeve. “Liv?” She looked back at him. “Thank you...for everything. My friend.”

Olivia smiled, nodding again. “You're mine too,” she whispered before playfully adding, “Happy Halloween.”

“You too.”

By the time he got out of the office just after six o’clock, trick-or-treating was already in full swing. He’d never seen so many children out all at once despite the cold that had come in just the week before. Even just outside Hogan Place, where the surrounding structures were all government buildings, kids dressed as vampires and princesses walked along the sidewalk, likely on their way to one of the parks on either side of the courthouse.

Rafael quickly decided to take an Uber to his neighborhood instead of taking the subway as he usually did--he could only imagine what kind of circus would’ve awaited him on the subway. Aside from avoiding children in costume, the clouds in the sky gave indication of oncoming rain and there was nothing worse than a muddy, old train station on a night when kids ran freely. His suit would have most definitely not survived a train ride to Greenwich Village.

Sebastian hadn’t asked him to bring anything, but still Rafael was used to never showing up to someone’s home empty handed. He’d stopped at his apartment and changed into more comfortable clothes and rifled through his kitchen cabinets until he’d found a bag of unmade popcorn and walked down the street to Sebastian’s building. A light sprinkle of rain had already begun to fall and Rafael quickened his stride in order to beat the possible storm that was approaching.

He let out a breath as he went in through the door beside the bar entrance and climbed the narrow staircase to the lone apartment. Knocking on the door, the ADA shifted his weight from one foot to the other as he waited for an answer. It wasn’t long before the door opened, revealing Sebastian in jeans that hugged him just right and a black tshirt.

“Hi,” the pianist said, stepping aside to let the lawyer cross over the threshold. “You look amazing.”

Blue eyes looked over him appreciatively, causing Rafael to blush as a heat quickly rose on the back of his neck and he felt his nipples harden beneath his dark blue button down.

“So do you,” he replied, smirking as he leaned in and dropped a chaste kiss on the pianist’s lips.

“So I was thinking pizza,” Sebastian said. “And I thought I’d leave the movie for you to pick. Took out all my scary ones just for you.”

“Oh, how thoughtful,” Rafael replied with a smirk as Sebastian helped him out of his jacket. “I brought popcorn.”

“I like it,” Sebastian said in a chuckle. “Dessert?”

“A salty, buttery dessert,” Rafael mused with a smirk. “That’s new.” He handed the square packet over and stepped further into the apartment. “Wow,” he said, looking at all the movies stacked on the coffee table. There must’ve been at least forty of them, spanning over thirty years. “So is it safe to say you love horror movies?”

“I love movies in general,” Sebastian answered as he walked past Rafael to cross the living room and go into the kitchen. “Beer?”

“Yes, please,” the ADA answered as he picked up The Shining and flipped it over to look at the back of the cover. “This movie terrified me when I first saw it.”

“Yeah, me too. Still does,” Sebastian said as he came back into the living room and handed Rafael one of the bottles in his hands. “You know it’s actually based on a real experience Stephen King had?”

“I thought I read that somewhere,” Rafael replied, looking back at the musician and tipping his bottle so that the neck clinked with the one Sebastian held. “Misery, too, right? Real experience?”

“Not as extreme, but yeah, it actually happened to him,” the pianist answered.

Another DVD caught Rafael’s eye and he snorted as he picked it up. “Not exactly scary.”

“Please, Hocus Pocus is, like, the classic Halloween movie,” Sebastian replied with a grin. “It’s got Bette Midler, witches and a talking cat, what else could you want?”

“You sold me with Bette Midler,” Rafael said, setting down The Shining and handing the other DVD to the musician.

“What do you like on your pizza?” Sebastian asked as he loaded the DVD.

“Mushrooms and pepperoni.”

“Eik, so maybe we’ll do a pepperoni and half with mushrooms,” Sebastian replied.

“You don’t like mushrooms?” Rafael asked.

“Nah, I don’t dig on fungi,” Sebastian said. “Pepperoni is good though.”

The ADA chuckled as he sat on the couch. “Fungi?”

“That’s what it is,” Sebastian answered with a grin as he bobbed his shoulders.

“Fair, but they happen to be good for you.”

“On pizza, huh?” Sebastian replied as he took up a stack of menus on the coffee table and flipped through them.

“Touche,” Rafael mumbled with the smirk still on his face.

“I still like ya,” Sebastian teased with a wink as he pulled out his phone and called the pizza place two blocks down.

Rafael took a moment to glance around the musician’s apartment and noticed what looked to be a guitar stand sitting by the window, though there was no guitar. He found himself wondering where the guitar was when Sebastian hung up the phone and looked over at him.

“Forty minutes,” he said, putting his phone down on the coffee table. “I guess pizza is more popular on Halloween than I thought.”

“That’s alright,” Rafael replied, turning his head to gesture to the guitar stand with his chin. “Didn’t realize you play guitar too.”

“Oh yeah,” the musician answered. “I don’t know if I’d say I play guitar, but I dabble a little.”

“I’d love to hear you play sometime.”

“Maybe, sometime,” Sebastian replied. “I never asked, you play anything?”

“Me? No,” Rafael answered. “I’m more of a crosswords guy. New York Times, they usually have the best ones.”

“Must be why you’re so good with words,” Sebastian said, earning a grin from the ADA. “I’m glad you decided to come over.”

“So am I,” Rafael answered. “Though I am a little curious as to what you usually do for Halloween.”

Sebastian bobbed his shoulders. “Last couple years I went to my buddy, Casper’s place. Dressed up, watched movies, hung out.”

“I see...so why no costume this year?”

“You want me in a costume? I can take care of that right now,” Sebastian replied, smiling as he stood and looked around his living room.

He reached for a red blanket that had been carelessly tossed in a bean bag chair in the corner of the room and hung it over his shoulders. Stepping to the bookshelf beside the window that faced the street, he gently flicked through the contents of a small tin on one of the shelves until he found a safety pin and used it to secure the blanket around his neck. Turning and holding his hands out, he grinned in triumph at the ADA.

“There, I’m a superhero,” he said.

Rafael laughed as he stood and walked up to the slightly shorter hand, straightening either side of his makeshift cape, pulling either side securely around the pianist’s shoulders. “I would’ve guessed Prince Charming.”

Sebastian grinned bashfully as the light tapping on the window by the piano became a pitter-patter of thick, heavy raindrops. Faint shrieks of surprise echoed from street level, and still all Rafael could see in that moment was Sebastian.

He could smell the other man’s soap, the same hint of cedar that had ingrained itself in his memory from the first time the musician had kissed him and Rafael found himself taking a small step closer. Eyes falling to Sebastian’s lips, the ADA let his fingers loosen until they released their hold on the blanket and grazed over the pianist’s broad chest. A barely visible shudder fell over Sebastian’s frame and his hands moved to grasp Rafael’s waist as he closed the space between them. Humming as Sebastian’s pout pressed against his, Rafael curled his own arms around the other man, one hand flattening against his back while the other took a fistful of soft, dark-blonde hair.

A tingle of what felt like the most gentle electricity traveled from his lips to his groin as he tilted his head to deepen their kiss. He groaned against Sebastian’s lips when he felt the pianist’s hands slide down to his hips and carefully squeeze, pulling him even closer. The skin beneath his shirt grew hot, aching to be touched and his heart felt as though it would burst through his ribs at any moment. A movement over his shaft caused a rush of blood to the area and Rafael groaned as his tongue slid along the musician’s wantonly. He took a step back when the pianist stepped forward until the backs of his calves met the edge of the couch.

The hand in Sebastian’s hair slid down his chest, over his stomach, inching towards his belt. When his fingers reached the hem of the musician’s tshirt, Rafael slipped them under the fabric to trail over the heated skin beneath. A moan vibrated against Rafael’s lips as Sebastian’s hands grasped his hips, gathering the material of his shirt and tugging until it was untucked from his jeans. He felt the gentle pulls of his shirt being unbuttoned and the cool air that hit his lower belly with each fasten that Sebastian loosened.

Rafael slid his hand further beneath the hem of the musician’s tshirt and stroked over the shorter man’s hairy belly. Moaning as Sebastian trailed kisses over his jawline and down the length of his neck, Rafael began to push the musician’s tshirt up when a loud crackle of thunder caused the two men to jolt in place. Their eyes met as they both panted softly, chests steadily moving up and down.

Before either could say or do anything, a sharp buzz cut through the air as the lights went out, leaving them with only the lightning and street lamps outside to illuminate the apartment.

“Well shit,” he heard Sebastian mumble. Rafael couldn’t help the chortle that passed through his lips. “I think I might have at least one candle around here somewhere.”

“You need help looking for it?” Rafael asked as the musician took up his phone and turned on the flashlight on the device.

“Nah, I’m pretty sure I know where it is, I’ll just be sec,” Sebastian answered.

“Okay. Where’s your bathroom?”

“It’s that first door in the hall. You gonna be okay without--” Sebastian’s inquiry was cut short when the ADA produced his own cell phone and turned on the flash.

“I’ll be fine,” Rafael answered with a smirk before he walked to the restroom. As he closed the door to the bathroom, he let out a breath and set his phone on the vanity before going to relieve himself.

His heart still pounded mercilessly in his chest and his lips burned from he and the pianists kissing as he shook off his semi erect penis and tucked it back into his jeans. Moving to the sink after he flushed, he turned on the water and splashed some over his face, effectively cooling the heated skin, before he washed his hands and fastened the unbuttoned bottom half of his shirt.

Despite his urge to go back into the living room and bend over Sebastian’s piano, the reality was that they’d never had a conversation about sex and Rafael knew that before they went any further, that talk would have to take place. Still, he wasn’t entirely sure he was ready for that conversation just yet. It had been so long since he’d been with anyone or even felt interested in anyone beyond admiring them from a distance. The idea of getting close, of being so painfully vulnerable to someone was still something that made him nervous.

Picking up his phone, he walked out of the bathroom and found Sebastian had lit a large, four-wick candle that was now situated on the center of the coffee table.

“I just got off the phone with Joe--he owns the building--said he’s working on getting the power back on, but it could be a little while,” the musician said. “These old buildings, you know? Fused blow all the time.”

“That’s okay,” Rafael answered as he sat down beside the pianist on the couch. “It’s kinda fitting for Halloween night, don’t you think?”

“Yeah, it definitely makes it a little spookier. Doesn’t sound like the rain’s gonna let up any time soon either,” Sebastian answered, looking over at Rafael and biting his bottom lip.

Rafael could feel a stir in his belly as the musician carefully slid closer to him and draped an arm over the back of the couch. He opened his mouth and looked about to say something when a knock sounded at the door and Sebastian sighed. He stood and answered it, paying for their pizza before he came back to join Rafael on the couch again.

For a moment, the two were silent and Rafael gently cleared his throat.

“So, I think we should talk about what happened before the power went out,” he said

“Yeah, that, uh...that kiss was really…” He watched as Sebastian searched for an adequate word to complete his statement and Rafael subconsciously licked his lips.

“Yes, it was,” he said, admiring the way the candle light fell over Sebastian’s face. “I want you.”

Sebastian’s chest expanded as he inhaled deeply and let the breath out. “I want you, too.”

“But it’s been awhile since I’ve had any kind of intimacy and I think, maybe we should just wait until...you know, we’re both ready,” Rafael replied.

“That’s the thing, I don’t really uh…” The pianist chuckled nervously and swallowed. “I can’t...ever really tell…”

“What do you mean?”

“Uh, let’s see how do I put this?” Sebastian mumbled to himself as he turned his head to look at the TV as though he would find the answer there. After a moment, he turned back to Rafael. “Okay. So...I was seeing this guy a few years back. Nothing serious, but I liked him and we pretty much slept together right away, right after the second date. I thought maybe we might’ve been exclusive, but he, I guess, didn’t think the same. He just wanted to have fun, which is fine, but it’s not what I wanted, you know? Then a couple years later, I met another guy and I figured, since having sex so quick didn’t pan out the first time, I figured I’d get to know him first.”

“That seems logical,” Rafael offered.

“That’s what I thought,” the musician answered with a somber smirk. “He told me he was looking for something serious, so I took him at his word.”

“But he wasn’t?”

Sebastian sighed. “No. We were uh...we were sharing a cab, on our way back from a date and he…” He took a deep breath. “He lived closer to the place we were coming from so, I gave the cab driver his address. We’d been seeing each for a little while by then and I figured, maybe it was time we took things to the next level...I didn’t tell him that, I just told the cab driver to go to his place. Anyway, right after I give the address, he says ‘Oh, I’m not going home yet. I’m gonna hit up Splash.’ Splash is a--”

“--The gay bar, yeah, I’ve been before. A long time ago, but I know the place. Why was he going to a gay bar if he was seeing you?”

“That’s what I said,” Sebastian answered. “And he said, ‘Well, I like you and all, but I’m horny, I wanna fuck.’ Needless to say, that was the end of that...and I haven’t dated since. So after both those experiences, I never know when the right time is to take that step. If it’s too soon, I risk that the relationship is built on something physical, which eventually won’t be enough for any kind of longevity. But if I wait too long, I risk that either the guy will get bored before we get there or that the sex will be terrible, in which case we’ll both have wasted our time.” He carefully turned in his seat to better face Rafael. “And the thing is I really like you a lot. So, I wanna do this right. You know, whatever’s right for us. I just don’t know what that is.” He chuckled and rubbed a hand over his face. “I’m broken.”

“You’re not broken,” Rafael whispered as another strike of lightning illuminated the candle-lit apartment. “And I like you a lot too. I really like spending time with you, even when it’s just coffee in the morning or a nightcap and a short walk to my building. And I’ll admit that sex has entered my mind, but...I want it to be right for us too. And I think we’ll know when the time is right for us to take that step.”

Sebastian smiled. “Think so?”

“I do,” Rafael answered, smiling back as he nodded. “I have a pretty bad history with relationships, too. I fell in love with one of my closest friends when I was a kid. Alex. I thought about telling him how I felt but I never did. Looking back though, I think part of him always knew in a way… Anyway, we got older and then I started to have feelings for this girl, Yelina, that we went to school with. I finally got to courage to ask her out and she accepted. I was so crazy about her and I even convinced myself that we would get married someday, have a family. After a few months of us dating, I noticed that she was spending more time with Alex.”

“Alex...you’re first love,” Sebastian said, gently squeezing the ADA’s hand in a form of comfort.

Rafael nodded and whispered, “Yes.”

He bit his lip as the memories came flooding back, the pain so vivid that it was as if he was right back in that place in time. A sting on his nose threatened to bring the long forgotten pain to the surface and he inhaled slowly, pushing the ache down into the depths of his subconscious.

“Pretty soon she only wanted to go out if Alex was going, and a few weeks after, she dumped me and started dating Alex. They’re married now...they have kids,” he said. “But I hadn’t seen them in years up until last week and judging from what happened it doesn’t look like I’ll see them again for a very long time, so at least there’s that.”

“Wait Alex...as in Alex Muñoz, the guy was running for mayor?” Rafael nodded. “I saw him on the news the other day. Sound like a couple of idiots, those two,” Sebastian replied. “They’d have to be to not see how lucky they were to have your attention.”

Rafael smirked sadly. “I had a couple of relationships in college but by the time I got to law school, I just kinda gave up on romance. And I was so busy that I never really noticed it’s absence...until I met you.”

Grinning at the ADA, Sebastian rocked forward in his seat to drop a brief kiss on the prosecutor’s lips. “I’m glad I met you too.”

There was a buzz that sounded just before the light flickered on again and Sebastian chuckled softly. “Well...why don’t we eat some pizza and settle in for Bette Midler. Then later we can pop that popcorn, scare ourselves with a little Nicholson. Sound good? Fun Halloween?”

“I would love that,” Rafael answered as the corner of his lips curled upward.

Sebastian opened the pizza box and held a hand up. “After you, please. Plates?”

“I think we can manage,” the ADA replied, still smirking as he tore a piece of pizza from the pie and took a bite. “So, does she sing in the movie?” he asked as Sebastian turned on the TV and started the DVD.

“Does she sing in the movie,” Sebastian repeated in a chortle before playfully adding, “Come on, it’s Bette Midler.”

“You know now I fully expect a big, diva performance,” Rafael teased.

“Oh, you’ll get it. I have this song on a playlist.”

“Interesting, what do you call this playlist?” Rafael asked.

“Pretty sure it’s just called Queens,” Sebastian answered, earning a hearty laugh from the ADA.

“I like it,” Rafael replied.

Sebastian grinned. “Oh good. How’s your pizza?”

“Delicious. Yours? Fungi-free?”

It was the musician’s turn to laugh. “Yeah, it’s good,” he answered as they both settled comfortably against the couch and placed their attention on the movie.

#the prosecutor and the piano bar #rabastian #law and order svu

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angelfireeast · 7 years

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You must really dislike Caitlin

Oh, boy this is going to be a long answer. I wish it was as simple as I don’t like Caitlin. I dislike what a waste of potential Caitlin is. I dislike how badly written she is. I dislike how writers always take the cheap way out with her, the lazy way and story always end up sucking because they don’t give crap tell her story the same way they tell Barry, Cisco, Harry and Iris’s stories. Finally, in season three by end of terrible writing, I completely stopped liking Caitlin as a character over the deeds she did as character & interaction of other characters in relation to said deeds. It was the final nail in the coffin of ‘I can’t keep hoping for better or pushing the bad writing side to enjoy the good bits there. I dislike her now in such manner of I don’t even want to see her on my screen without some big changes to how she handled.’ It was such a bad story in s3. It made her look bad in every way possible and not the good kind of ‘oh I love that bad villain’ sorta way. Everything sucked. Season three and spoilers thus far for season four have made lost complete faith that writers will do right by Caitlin Snow.

But lets talking about writing because that’s the root of the problem.

Caitlin has few problems that define her character. She’s static flat character that suffers “factory resets” at the start of every season that means hardly from last season effects her save the odd time here or there. She’s also completely defined as the love interest and makes her character who lacks depth in a sea of characters with way more depth growing deeper with each passing season.

Think about every season:

Her plot in season one was grieving Ronnie & helping build team Flash. At a certain point, she was a fun more happy character.

Season two Ronnie died for real. Six-month time jump & Caitlin magically moved on back into bouncy fun character eyeing Fake!Jay’s abs and making friends with Harry as of 2x02. They did touch on her grief with Ronnie but only with they gunning up kill fake!Jay and start Hunter/Zoom story. S3B ended with Caitlin suffering extreme PTSD due to her kidnapping.

Season 3, post-flashpoint, it’s like Zoom never happened! She’s back to a bouncy fun character again. All the development that should’ve come from Fake!jay/Zoom was completely wiped away. They Flashpointed away all her growth! Even when she started a relationship with Julian it was still like there was nothing that happened in s2. Not even in a way that you go ‘so what happened instead’. No there is just a blank hole like season two never happened to her. A season’s whole juicy development just brushed aside like nothing.

You know who that doesn’t happen to? Cisco. Barry. Iris. Cisco was deeply affected by Eobard’s betrayal. His issues with Wells manifesting different ways carried on into s3 with HR. Barry does bounce back to the ‘happy guy’ at the start of each season but he doesn’t lose the development from last season like Caitlin does. Things from last season shape his actions in the next. Caitlin is the only one not to address Eobard’s betrayal. All she got was angry but didn’t speak to Eobard about it. They didn’t show her feelings after the initial point of revealing his betrayal. That’s where story basically ended because her story served Barry (& Cisco’s) in the prove Dr. Wells was the Man in Yellow plot. Barry, Cisco, and Joe all talked to Eobard in the cell but Caitlin? Nope, she got married. Had to get her heart broken in time for s2 to cause to leave the time for 6 months and then Factory Reset. Meanwhile, Cisco & Barry were deeply affected by Eobard. Joe has affected which in turn affected things with Harry. Iris was grieving Eddie which showed it’s self by putting a stop on westallen for s2B. What did Caitlin get? She got a man with nice abs and it was like she wasn’t grieving for Ronnie at all in 2x02. When Reverse Flash returned we again saw Cisco and Barry’s feelings on the matter. This time with Harry’s feelings thrown in there but Caitlin was a background player. Why? Why can’t we ever hear or see her feelings? She was just as betrayed as others. She lost her husband twice due to Eobard’s evil plans. Okay, that’s now as bad as murdering your mom or being murdered in AU timeline but still. We hear Joe’s voice and even Harry’s voice more Caitlin. Because the writers don’t give a crap about her. They don’t care about telling her story. When you add it all up everything out its incredibility frustrating. Everyone else got have a story dealing with Eobard and fallout from season one and Caitlin got story about new man in her life as Fake Jay then scary Hunter/Zoom.

Caitlin is the most underdeveloped character on the show. All her relationships, save Cisco, are defined by being a love interest. Even her friendship with Barry was based in bonding on a shared understanding of loss in s1. Ago connected to Ronnie making her love interest. Which would be no problem if did repeat the being love interest every damn season. Season two the only character she becomes real friends with was Harry and rest of her story was about being a love interest to Jay and minor friendship stuff with Cisco/Barry. The writers choose NOT to give Caitlin and Iris a big friendship story when it was the perfect time to give them one! These two women just have in a proximity friendship or as the writers liked to call it ‘work friends’. Iris learned the secret, she joined team Flash, both women were going through the same thing losing a lover it was the perfect time to build their friendship. Instead, they choose to build Caitlin & fake!Jay & focus on that. Caitlin has no close friendship with Joe, Wally or Jesse. Think about it when has Caitlin ever had one or one scene with Joe? or Wally? Harry tried to get Caitlin to talk to Jesse on bases of ‘great close relationship’ and even she was like ‘we’re not even close!’. The writers do not care about writing her beyond the tiny little box. I don’t feel that distance with Cisco/Iris or Cisco/Joe as I do with Caitlin. How many close female friends does Caitlin have? None. Work friends with Iris & Felicity. She had a random friend from her six-month job when the show needed a one-off villain. The writers let Iris be friends with Linda and Cecile. Yes, there more of connection but my point is the writers don’t try to make ANY connection with Caitlin and other women on the show. Given Harry & Julian, they prove Caitlin is easily more to friendly and open and welcoming on the team. They just don’t care about writing it. Harry is the only non-romantic character who the writers actual spend time letting Caitlin develop a relationship post s1. Which is ridiculous given how much the team has expanded since then - Iris, Jesse, Wally, HR, and allies like Cindy, Cecile, Linda, real Jay + every other superhero.

So yeah, I don’t like Caitlin anymore. I’m beyond frustrated with the writing. I’ve given up hope of better things. If they can’t put the effort into Killer Frost plot then when will put the effort into her character? There is no reason she can be written with same respect and development as everyone else on the team. This show has a problem with misogynistic writing. Just because Iris gets off lighter then Caitlin does make it less of problem. Two women on the show but they friends till one is married and they bridesmaid? The narrative problems with that be damned. Upwards of four women on the show at best but we are lucky if two interact in a truly positive way. (I’m talking Iris/Linda or Iris/Cecile because of she as hell never Caitlin or Jesse or Cindy with someone.) We don’t have strong female drive plots on this show. Iris’s mom plot? That was a nothing story, terrible, didn’t get to see much of Iris’s feelings or even Wally with his mom over in two seconds. Jesse become Jesse Quick? The only speeders to hand-me-down suit. What other hero or villain wore the same suit as another character? Besides the two actors playing Reverse Flash. They don’t care enough to give Jesse Quick her own suit. They gave Fake!Jay a suit, Zoom a suit and the real Jay a suit modified twice plus Rival got a suit! That’s not even touching on Jesse’s rushed plots lacking logic or the disrespect of characters not thinking her as skilled as male speeders or letting her do things ‘because think of her father’.

Caitlin is always defined as a love interest. Frist Ronnie, they fake!Jay/Hunter, and Julian. Even Killer Frost story had love interest tacked on. Julian trailing around behind her telling her he loved her when there was hardly time for to fall in love with her. Her feelings weren’t that strong but it doesn’t matter. We suffered through the plot. Julian’s voice ended being louder then Cisco and Barry when it came to Killer Frost. Never did hear Iris, Joe or Wally say a damn thing because it was always Julian, Cisco or Barry talking. The only thing Iris ever got to save was ‘We have to help Caitlin. Think of Caitlin. What about Caitlin’. Yet we never got see KF and Iris confront things.

Killer Frost should’ve been her biggest story but instead, it was an inconstant mess that left me hating her. I can’t enjoy Killer Frost the villain or Caitlin Snow “the hero” because didn’t commit to either. Caitlin sure as heck didn’t act like a good person in s3 but show kept having the other characters abolishing her all responsibility for everything. From KF or betraying the team with stone. Likewise, the story started Killer Frost isn’t Caitlin’s fault it’s evil meta powers but wait no it isn’t, but wait for the characters on the show still, hold don’t her responsible even the show proved she had a choice in her actions. The writers tried to have cake and eat it too when it came to Killer Frost or maybe they just stopped caring. She had clear motives then it became meta power=evil just because. She started with logical motives in s3A. She used her powers with and without becoming Killer Frost. It was very clearly an emotionally driven thing which like she became very angry and lashed using her powers. Such as trying to kill the man who tried to kidnap her, all the times you start eyes go in 3x07 because she was more and pissed at Barry & upset and situation. Everything made sense. Till it stopped making sense… She was scared of becoming KF, but acted counterproductive to preventing it, KF just seemed cartoon evil. Evil for the sake of it. It looked for a minute like KF might have ‘anit Caitlin Snow thing’ and the show was going play two personalities but then made clear nope one person. So that just left KF as power high that comes out during emotional distress? I guess. Caitlin decided powers=evil so was she was evil? Why? What made the evil. it seemed like she saw E2 KF was evil and decided that what her powers were. S3B KF just wanted to as powerful as god. The writers didn’t even care enough to play angle like she was sick of feeling & was choosing KF/power to get away from pain. She just wanted to be God didn’t give rat behind about killing Cisco her best friend. It was too big of jump just wake up evil & not caring killing Cisco. Didn’t even flinch on three times she tried to kill him. I’m supposed to take that fact that saved him after he threw the cure at her AFTER her side was had clearly lost (so no goddess power for her)? It felt hollow. Completely and totally hallow. I had no basis in which to understand anything or sudden change so she feels hallow. If they stuck with one thing like Mupility Personality or made it clear she was making choices because X or had other characters react better SOMETHING maybe I could get my head about things.

Now, what season four is coming along and it sounds like another factory reset is coming. Sure we might still get some minor Killer Frost stuff but all her relationships? Her being the team? Back working as a hero? All factory reset. It borders on negative continuity a lot of the time. In fact, failing to address things with Killer Frost like stuff between Caitlin & Iris is outright negative continuity. Caitlin’s going change her style and work bar. Maybe that will something but given way KF is just being pushed aside in her relationships. The show is just acting like Iris and Caitlin was even bigger pals then before. Caitlin picked herself, the fear of the possibility of becoming KF, over Iris’s life every day for months when she kept that stone. That’s 100% Caitlin Snow and it’s never been addressed with Iris. Just Julian because all the love interest’s feelings matter remember. Suddenly I’m supposed to think Caitlin cares about Iris as a friend after no friendship for four years? After how she treated her as Caitlin in s3 on top of KF? As if. Caitlin stood there watching the West family suffering in a family for months testing that piece of the stone. Watching Iris tearful confess to her father that she was going to be murdered. Watch, Iris, Wally, Joe and Barry’s total heartbreak as they struggled to find a way to save her. To stop Savitar. Much like Caitlin’s sudden show of friendship for Cisco after trying to kill him three times it rings completely hollow.

I have interest in putting any more goodwill and hope of better things in Caitlin’s character when each season the writers find a new way to fail her character and let me down. They really excelled at failing her in s3 and it’s already blowing over in s4. So yeah, I really don’t like Caitlin anymore. I don’t like how other characters are being negatively affected by the lack of growth and bad storytelling Caitlin gets.

#anti caitlin snow #the flash spoilers

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agentmarymargaretskitz · 7 years

Text

I am meant to be wherever you are next to me

*shamelessly writes E4 Captain Canary for the F*** Destiny campaign*

AO3, Fanfiction

Earth-4

Rain pelted the windows of Sara and Leonard’s apartment lightly, a relief from the downpour that had gone on earlier. The couple was curled up together on the couch. Sara was wrapped up in a blanket, leaning against Leonard. Both were in their pajamas, not saying a word. Music from the player played softly to fill the space of their home.

Sara was still recovering from getting kidnapped the previous week by the Rogues and two metas who had decided they would strike back at the Flash. Lisa had been taken too, but she was dealing a lot better. Leonard knew that his fiancée was blaming herself for her sister’s hospitalization. She had told him that they had threatened Laurel’s life if she didn’t give up the identity of the Flash. When she refused to say a thing, Laurel had been attacked in her office in Star City by one of the metas, Shade. Now, she was lying in the hospital with a broken leg and Sara was wracked with guilt that she had gotten her big sister hurt.

When they had gotten Lisa and Sara away from the Rogues, Leonard had wanted to go after them for hurting the people he cared about. Lily had been right there with him, but Linda and Mick had talked them down before they did anything stupid. But now Shade, the other metahuman, and the Rogues had fled town. They had tried to trace where they had gone, but Allen had gotten smart and disabled the tracker that had once been on his gun. For the time being, all of them were in the wind. The next time any of them showed up in Central City, Leonard was planning to go head to head with any of the people who had hurt one of his sisters and his fiancée.

The song that had been playing came to an end, and the player moved to the next one on the playlist. Soft piano music started out.

Can’t say how the days will unfold

Can’t change what the future may hold

But, I want you in it,

Every hour, every minute

Beside him, Sara shifted a little, her hand emerging to pull the blanket. Her engagement ring became visible with the action.

Leonard stood at the doorway of one of the rooms that was an offshoot of the cortex. Exhaling, her took a step forward. “Sara?”

The blonde scientist looked up at him. “Hey, what’s up?”

“So everything’s died down with Everywoman and her plot to replicate her ability in other people,” Leonard said, taking a step forward. “Much of which is thanks to you.”

“The Flash was the one who got her subdued and into custody,” Sara told him.

“Which he never would have been able to do without the help of a biochemist and her serums to neutralize Everywoman’s abilities and undo the damage her experiments had done to her subjects,” Leonard added. “Not to mention Eddie and Mick’s helping out too. Especially Mick working with Dr. Jiwe without either of them trying to rip out the other’s throat.”

Sara shrugged. “Fair enough. We all make a good team.”

“Indeed we do,” he agreed. “But since things seem to be in a lull, do you want to go out sometime? Dinner perhaps?”

She smiled. “Is the Flash asking me on a date?”

“No,” Leonard shook his head. “Leonard Snart is.”

“Then I’d love to.”

The world can race by far too fast.

Hard to see while it’s all flying past.

But, it’s clear now.

When you’re standing here now.

I am meant to be wherever you are next to me.

Leonard closed his eyes.

“I didn’t see it,” Leonard lamented. “I should have seen it coming, and I didn’t until it was too late. I was too focused on Grundy. I didn’t even think he’d have help.”

“I’ll heal,” Sara told him, wincing a little as she tried to push herself in the bed. “It’ll be a lot slower than you, but I will heal. But you have to stop blaming yourself.”

“It’s my fault though,” Leonard replied. “I wasn’t fast enough for you.”

“I’m still alive,” she reminded him. “I’ve got a couple of stitches, but I’m alive. It was a win in the end for Team Flash. We’ll all learn from our mistakes, beef up security, and move on.”

He nodded and turned to leave the room.

“Leonard?”

“Yeah?”

Sara blushed a little. “Can you say with me until I fall asleep?”

No words needed to be said. Leonard simply grabbed a chair and sat down beside her as Sara drifted off.

All I want to do,

Is come running home to you

Come running home to you

And all my life I promise to

Keep running home to you

Keep running home,

To you.

A small smile crossed over Sara’s face as Leonard’s arm slipped around her.

Leonard was staring at the military facility that lay ahead of him. The one where his sister was trapped inside. Finally, after a year since she’d vanished, the mystery of Lily’s disappearance had been solved. They had found the security footage of her and the other woman who Sara had been friends with that showed the merge the night of the accelerator explosion. Sara had told them the military had taken her after Linda tried to contact her.

“I’m here,” he said into his comm. “How are things back there?”

“Eddie and Mick are almost done with the splicer,” Sara replied. “I know you know this, but-“

“Be careful?” he finished, smirking a little.

“I’m serious, Leonard,” Sara told him. “We’ve met Luthor before. We know she wants to use metahumans for the army. She already has Lily and Linda. Don’t let her take you too.”

“I won’t. I promise, Sara. I’ll come back to you.”

And I could see it,

Right from the start,

That you would be,

Be my light in the dark,

Light in the dark.

Oh, you gave me no other choice,

But to love you.

Sara walked into the cortex where Mick had set his best friend up in. Leonard Snart was still in a coma today. For the past months, this had been the norm every day. Between working with Mick to find ways to one day revitalize STAR Labs and monitoring Central City for any aftereffects of the accelerator fallout, this was her life now. The career of biochemistry she had hoped to jumpstart at STAR Labs had taken a sharp downward turn. Not only that, but Linda was dead and Eddie had gone to Mercury Labs.

“Okay, Mr. Snart,” she said aloud, pulling up the data for him on her tablet to fill in his current condition. “Same as always.”

Letting out a sigh, she looked down at the tablet. Before she could make an entry of data, she heard a gasp. Her head snapped up to see Leonard Snart bolting upright. He was looking wildly around in confusion. Sara typed out a quick message to Mick to get to the cortex as soon as possible. Then she set down the tablet and hurried over to evaluate his state.

“Look at me,” Sara ordered, pulling out a flashlight to check his pupil response. It was normal, although he was frowning at her.

“Who the hell are you and where am I?” he asked, trying to crawl out the bed.

“Dr. Sara Lance,” she said quickly. “You’re at STAR Labs. Please, just stay where you are.”

Leonard stared around the room again. “How did I get here?”

“I brought you here.”

Both turned as Mick entered the room.

All I want to do,

Is come running home to you,

Come running home to you.

And all my life I promise to,

Keep running home to you,

Keep running home,

Home to you.

As soon as Leonard sped into the room, Sara could see that he was hurt badly. His suit was torn horribly in what seemed like every place possible. She could make out blood in the scarlet of his suit. Quickly, she ran around the table towards the medical room as Mick and Eddie helped Leonard up. Leonard was barely able to keep himself on his feet as they got him up onto the bed.

“Oh my god,” she uttered as she started to clean the gashes on his arm out. “What the hell happened?”

“I don’t know how to describe it,” Leonard groaned. “I barely got out of there with my eyes.”

“If you were a normal person, you’d in serious trouble right now,” she lectured.

“Luckily, I’m not normal,” he chuckled weakly. “Besides, I made you a promise. I’ll always come back for you.”

Sara smiled briefly before moving over to clean the injuries on his chest.

Can’t say how the days will unfold,

Can’t change what the future may hold.

But, I want you in it,

Every hour, every minute.

“Sara Lance, I love you. And I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Will you marry me?”

She nodded vigorously. “Yes. Yes, Leonard.”

Leonard smiled as the song died away. He remembered how terrified he had been of proposing to Sara. It wasn’t so much the proposal that scared him as the response that Sara would give him. But she had said yes. Both of them had been overjoyed for different reasons, but happy all the same.

Sara looked up at him. “You’ve always come back to me.”

“And I promise I always will,” Leonard said. “No matter what happens to us, who tries to hurt us, I’ll always come back to you, Sara Lance.”

She smiled. “I might not be a metahuman, but if anything ever happened to you, I would do everything possible to find you again because I love you.”

“I love you too,” he murmured back as she cozied closer to him.

Slowly, they fell asleep together like that. The music acted as a lullaby, encouraging them to fall into dreamland. Neither were sure of what the future had in store for them, but they were willing to take it on together.

In the early hours of the morning, at Central City University, a student woke up with a start suddenly. He sat up in bed, still breathing heavily. Yet another strange series of dreams had decided to visit him that night. He still didn’t understand why he kept having them. Whatever the reason for them was, he hoped that the white haired woman who had sent spikes of ice at him only existed in his head and wasn’t a real metahuman.

#captain canary #earth 4 captain canary #legends of tomorrow #earth 4 #earth 4 sara lance #earth 4 leonard snart #fanfiction #earth 4 mick rory #earth 4 eddie thawne

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