#i was going to take longer to make this post but i feel sad today so i decided to write it to cheer myself up

[sojirosteacup]

Hanadan character name meanings

As it is common with anime/manga characters, the characters in Hana Yori Dango have names that relate to their storyline. In this post, I'll attempt to translate the names of the main characters from Japanese.

Warning, long post under the cut:

Before we begin

All their names are pretty much the same in mandarin, with the exception of Tsukushi/Shancai, so these translations partially fit Meteor Garden too. (but I don't know mandarin, so I can't give you more than this, sorry)

Due to the way korean names work (and the unfortunate implications of giving korean characters japanese sounding names), they were completely renamed in the K-drama. I'm gonna make a separate post for their korean names later.

They were also renamed in the thai drama but I know nothing about thai, so I won't even try to translate those, sorry (I make one speculation in this post and that's it, lol).

Japanese names, when written in japanese characters, have the family name coming first and personal name second. That's the order I'm gonna use here.

I make a few stretches here and there because I'm not a native japanese speaker nor a specialist in japanese name meanings. This was translated with the help of two japanese dictionary apps/sites and my obsession with this fucking manga.

Now that you read all of this, let's begin with our protagonist:

Makino Tsukushi (牧野つくし)

Her name is the most obvious one because the story revolves around it, but lets take a look at it anyway

牧野 (Makino) Let's look at the kanji for it separately:

牧 (Boku, Maki) - breed, care for, shepherd, feed, pasture

野 (ya, no) - plains, field, rustic, civilian life

牧野 (Makino), can also be read as Bokuya, which means "pasture land" or "ranch".

Her name つくし (Tsukushi) doesn't use Kanji, but it's mentioned many times in that story that is a type of weed plant.

If I were to put everything together and attempt to translate it, it turns into something like… Pasture land weed.

Poor girl.

Doumyouji Tsukasa (道明寺司)

道明寺 (Doumyouji) - If you look at these characters apart, they don't mean anything in particular

道 (Dou) means road, path, street, teachings (like in the martial art judo, or the art of tea ceremony, chadou)

明 (myou) means wisdom, mantra, light, bright [insert obvious joke about F4 thailand here].

寺 (Ji) is a counter for temple, which is why Yuuki's ex, in the double date in the manga, makes fun of him asking if his family lived in a temple. 寺 is also a radical in the kanji 時 (toki) (hour) and the word 時間 (jikan) (time), which I guess is where they took Thyme`s nickname from.

But 道明寺 (Doumyouji) as a whole is the name of a japanese street candy. Kamio once said on her twitter that the F4 was based off a dango and all of them were supposed to be named after candy, but she ended up scrapping the idea because she didn`t have time to think of candy names for all of them. Doumyouji was the only one that kept the original naming concept.

Now let's go to the rest of his name:

司 (Tsukasa, Shi) - director, official, rule. (Fun fact: there is a verb, tsukasadoru, that means "to be in charge, to manage, to rule, to govern, to control")

This one is obvious, Tsukasa is the leader of the F4.

If I were to put both names together and translate his full name it would mean something like… Candy ruler. He is the leader of the dango that is the F4. 🍡

He doesn`t sound that threatening when we put it like this lol

Hanazawa Rui (花沢類)

花沢 (Hanazawa) - Let`s look at the words separately:

花 (hana) means flower

沢 (sawa) means valley, swamp, marsh, brilliance, grace

Hanazawa would mean something like "flower valley" (I don't know if it could translate as "flower grace")

類 (Rui) means sort, kind, variety, similar

If I were to translate his full name, it would be something like: "A kind of flower valley" or, if I really stretch it, "Like a flower valley"

And notice this funny thing: Tsukasa and Rui's names are a walking spoiler! Hana Yori Dango, the name of the manga itself, is oficially translated as "Boys over flowers", but another translation of it could be "Candy (Dango) over flowers". If Doumyouji is the candy leader and Hanazawa is a flower valley… Damn, I wonder who the main character is going to choose. /s

Now to my favorite boy Nishikado Soujirou (西門総二郎):

(西門) Nishikado:

西 (nishi) means west

門 (kado, mon) means gate and, as I recently found out, "branch of learning based on the teachings of a single master". Obviously, his name comes from the second meaning.

So, Nishikado would mean "Branch of learning (tea ceremony) from the west" or "Lineage of (tea ceremony) masters from the west".

With "Soujirou", let's start with Jirou first:

二 (ni, Ji) - Two. That's literally the kanji for the number 2. No mystery here.

郎 (rou) - Counter for sons.

So if it's not obvious yet, 二郎 (Jirou) is used in names to mean that the person is the second son. You see it in anime character names all the time, look for it, you'll find it.

総 (Sou) - whole, all, overall, entire

The "Sou" part is maybe not supposed to mean anything in particular, but if you are still reading this long ass post you want to see me try to find a meaning for it. So if i stretch it, maybe it could be "full second son" (which doesn't make much sense) or, if I really stretch it, it could maybe mean "Second of all sons"

So his name would be: "Second son overall from the west lineage of (tea ceremony) masters"

Boy that's not a name, that's a whole ass title. 😭

And, yes, his older brother is called Souichirou, and by this logic his younger brother is probably called Sousaburou, or something like that.

Last but not least: Mimasaka Akira (美作あきら)

美 (mi, bi) means beauty, beautiful

作 (saka, sa, tsuku) means prepare, to make, build (it's the same kanji used in the verb Tsukuru - to make, to produce)

Mimasaka would mean something like "Make beauty" or "beautifully made"

Akira (あきら), on the other hand… it doesn't use a Kanji. It's the same case as Tsukushi, except with her we know the meaning because the character herself says it. But Akira doesn't, so i have no idea what it could mean since we don't have the kanji for it.

(sorry Akira)

But translating what it can, it would mean "Akira makes beauty" or even "The beautifully made Akira" (which at least sounds cool asf, come on)

#hana yori dango #boys over flowers #meteor garden #meta #i was going to take longer to make this post but i feel sad today so i decided to write it to cheer myself up #japanese

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#srry for the continued pause in scribbles ive been feeling not very good at all #idk something just broke in my brain after our last sampling trip idk y bc it wasnt that bad but when i got back #it was just a couple days of my brain being real crazy in terms of thought patterns. it still kinda continues to b like that #but idk i haven't had a session of hysterical crying today so maybe im on the mend. its weird i haven't felt this bad in a really long time #i dont even have the energy to complain about it its just no joy. burned streight thru that. bruned streight thru my desire to draw #i mean i still draw every day but its like shitty i dont have time scribbes bc idk it all feels so fucking pointless. and im terrible at #hiding how i feel abt things so my boss is like: maybe u should take a break this weekend i dont want u to burnout. like. lady we crossed #that bridge way back in March. u r speaking to a ghost. i just. i dont kno if i can stay here until like next july at least if not longer #and it sucks bc i kno someday ill look back and this time in my life will make me real sad bc im laying here choosing to make myself #miserable and i somwhere halfway across the country my mum has tumors growing in her abdomen. and i cant go home for Thanksgiving and idk #how long ill get at Christmas. not bc anyone is telling me i have to stay. my brain just wont let me do things. i just lay here in my #increasingly chaotic apartment not taking the steps to get refunded for travel expenses worrying over deadlines and agonizing over social #interactions. worrying about all the things my brain wont let me do that need to be done and not taking the steps to get better #its stupid and annoying and i know its only going to get worse when i have to start taking measurements in the lab #ive at least been practicing a lot of german tho lmao. someday ill look back like: lol remember when u got super depressed and filled the #void with learning german? literally today my dyslexic read the word albeit as aber and it was v disorienting #idk its just fun and i feel like im at least being productive. so yea idk when ill b able to post scribbles again #but i thought id at least post something while i had the energy i accumulated by taking with a happy Canadian lab group #maybe ill join them in a year idk idk decisions decisions and so many applications the cost of which is trying to dissuade me from #getting a tatt0o :-P ay ay ay live a little! pls i beg u. but no prob not. against the rules #unrelated

[rosyblooom]

I just finished watching Daisy Jones and the Six and I wanted to ask if you could write a Charles SMAU where his wife passes away from illness and leaves a video behind for him to find happiness. They can have a little child together please. Thank you😊❤️

when i die, i want you to live | cl16 smau

PAIRING: charles leclerc x wife!reader SUMMARY: after battling illness, y/n unexpectedly succumbs to it much sooner than expected, leaving behind her husband and their daughter. 8 months later, charles is not coping very well, so your best friend hands him an envelope addressed to him from you. WARNING(S): mentions of death, sad A/N: ooh i love that show!! anyway, this is my first ever request (!!), so hope it's as u imagined 🫶

creds to @classiclitfreak for proofreading!! <3

yourusername posted to her story!

[ caption 1: I sure hope so!😌 ] [ caption 2: my heart is so full🥹💕 ]

charles_leclerc

liked by yourusername, arthur_leclerc, scuderiaferrari and 735,290 others

charles_leclerc Today, 27 years ago, is the very special day that brought me my beautiful wife and best friend. Forever grateful for that. Happiest of birthdays to you, Mon cœur ❤️

view all 3,958 comments

username HAPPY BIRTHDAY Y/N WE LOVE YOU😍

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yourusername ❤️❤️

(liked by author)

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scuderiaferrari happy birthday y/n 🥳🥳

username if my man ain't like charles i don't want him

username real

yourusername

liked by charles_leclerc, carlossainz55, yourbestfriend and 263,719 others

yourusername had the loveliest birthday with my dearest people!💕thank you for all the birthday wishes, they've been such a joy! 🥹 here's to another beautiful year, here's to 27🥂

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yourbestfriend ily to the moon and back ❤️❤️

yourusername love u so much🥹

username queen🫶

username 27 and still looks young af iktr! see what happens when u're unproblematic😌

username that's bc 27 IS young lol

charles_leclerc belle👸

yourusername 😘 username you guys are so cute omg username *cries in 29 and single*🤧

username girl drop the link to the dress RIGHT NOW @/yourusername

yourusername it's from my spring collection love! xx username you ate that y/n😌

iamrebeccad you look so pretty 💗

yourusername my girl 🤍

Three weeks later...

tmz_tv

liked by username, username, username and 1,005,862 others

tmz_tv Tragic news emerged in the early hours of this morning as Y/N L/N-Leclerc, a renowned fashion designer and philanthropist, passed away unexpectedly, just three weeks past her twenty-seventh birthday. Her untimely passing has left her family and friends in shock and disbelief.

In a statement released by her family, it was revealed that Y/N had been battling illness for an undisclosed duration. However, medical professionals had initially estimated a longer prognosis, making her sudden passing even more devastating.

During this profoundly sorrowful time, we extend our heartfelt condolences to Y/N's family.

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username wow and to think she was always so smiley even with all this going on behind the scenes

username a literal ray of sunshine🥹

username I can't imagine how charles feels right now omg, please take care charlie🫶

username this doesn't feel real...

username y/n was always working with charities all across the globe, she was an absolute angel. her impact will live on 💛

username is it just me who's thinking about their little girl in all this?? she must be so heartbroken :(

username I think bc she's so young she probably doesn't even understand what's going on😭💔

username y/n, you were a great addition to the paddock, always smiling and just all around lovely to fans. we won't ever forget you!💕

username sending prayers to the family 🙏

scuderiaferrari

liked by username, username, username and 594,752 others

scuderiaferrari Due to personal matters, Charles Leclerc will not be continuing racing for the remainder of the season. Ollie Bearman, our reserve driver, will take his place instead.

This was not an easy decision, and therefore we ask that you handle this news with respect and sensitivity.

Our thoughts and support are with Charles Leclerc and his family during this challenging time. 🙏❤️

comments have been disabled

8 months later...

Charles enters the living room, ensuring the door closes softly behind him to avoid disturbing his little girl. Running his fingers over his beard, he examines the envelope in his hand and sighs. Y/N’s best friend pressed it into his hand at a dinner party the previous evening, insisting he watch it as soon as he finds the time. And here he is now, holding the thin envelope.

If someone had told him when he was younger that he’d get emotional over something as simple as seeing his wife’s handwriting on paper, he would have scoffed in disbelief. Not him, that would have seemed absurd. Yet here he is, feeling a lump form in his throat over mere black ink on paper.

As peculiar as it seems, he brings the envelope to his nose, and memories of Y/N flood his mind. He can almost feel her soothing touch as she works the knots out of his back after a gruelling day of racing. Inhaling, he feels Y/N’s sweet scent—it is as comforting as her smile.

A smile tugs at Charles' lips as he pictures that infectious grin that lit up his wife’s face at the most unexpected moments. It was one of the things he loved most about her—she had a way of bringing brightness to even the darkest of days.

Shaking his head, he snaps out of the trance, shifting deeper into the living room until he sinks into the welcoming embrace of the couch. There, he retrieves the laptop resting on the coffee table, feeling the weight of the moment as he opens the envelope and extracts a flash drive from within. Rolling it between his fingers, he inserts it into the side of his laptop with a determined motion.

Once all is in place, he watches a file labelled “To my dearest Lover, brightest Heart, and deepest Soul” materialise in his list of files. The sight catches him off guard—his throat constricts, making each breath a struggle, and his eyes well up, though he fights against the tears. Not now. He can't afford it. Allowing himself to be consumed by grief would mean losing precious time, time he needs for his daughter waiting in her playroom down the hallway.

He takes a moment to regain composure, squeezing his eyes shut, focusing on the rhythm of his breath until the tension in his chest begins to ease. With a sharp intake of air, he opens his eyes wide and taps the file, revealing a video. Running his teeth over his lower lip, he hovers the pointer over the play button, then taps the mousepad with a steady hand.

The video opens with Y/N seated on the very same pale couch he’s currently occupying. He places both hands onto the soft sofa, yearning for a connection, a way to feel her, even though he knows he can’t—touching the past is impossible.

Y/N walks toward the camera, readjusting it before taking three steps backward and retaking her seat. Inhaling deeply, she hesitates, her mouth opening, then closing again, like a fish out of water.

“Mon cœur,” Charles whispers, moving the laptop onto the coffee table.

“Hmm,” Y/N drops her hands into her lap and smooths down her flowery dress. She stares directly at the camera, tilting her head sideways with a crooked smile. “I don’t know where to start.”

Her eyes widen. “After all this planning, I still don’t know where to begin.” She lets out a few chuckles and then purses her lips. “Well, I suppose greetings are in order?”

Her expression softens as her brows furrow. “Hello, my darling, my world, my everything.”

“Hey,” Charles whispers, his throat tight with emotion, barely allowing sound to escape.

“Although I'm very happy to see you, if you’re watching this, it means you're not living as I want you to,” Y/N's voice trembles, causing her to pause and swallow. “I know it’s hard, baby. I don’t expect this to be easy on you, but I don’t want you to spend the rest of your life looking back at us in sadness, you know?”

Charles leans forward, elbows on his lap, eyes fixed on the screen, his face tinged with a faint shade of red.

“Remember our first date, when we had to cancel our reservations at that restaurant because you felt sick on the way there?” Y/N bursts into laughter but quickly stifles it, her hand covering her mouth.

“No, no,” Charles pleads softly, shaking his head, “please don’t hide your beautiful smile, my love.”

“It’s not like there was anything you could do about being sick, but I remember feeling miffed because I already had a stressful day, so for you to cancel just like that, it irritated me,” she reminisces with a nod. “But you were quite pale, so I wanted to make sure you got home alright. And we walked, barely talked,” she giggles, the joy reaching her eyes, “but then this little kid appeared, his name was…”

“Benny,” they both say simultaneously, a faint smile tugging at one corner of Charles' lips.

"Boy, was he excited to meet you, his idol. It was like seeing a completely different person. You became someone entirely new for this little boy whom you didn’t even know. Nobody forced you to take time out of your day when he came running, his arms wide open," Y/N says, extending her arms along with the words. "You could’ve just walked away. I mean, you had a reason to: you were sick."

Pausing for a moment, Y/N sits up straighter, leaning forward and shaking her head. "But you didn’t. You put on a brave face, and you turned into Benny’s hero and so much more. I think we stood there with his parents for about half an hour, and you didn’t complain once. And that’s when I knew."

Y/N nods, crossing her legs and slinging one hand behind the sofa. "That’s when I knew you could be the man I was going to marry. And turns out you were," she says, smiling sheepishly. "The love you have for people, for our daughter, it’s… it’s so profound, it’s boundless. So don’t limit it. Don’t you dare limit yourself just because I’m not around anymore."

Her expression turns serious as she exhales. “You’re such a bright light. You bring happiness and purity into people’s lives—into my life,” Y/N presses her hand against her chest. “I don’t want you to dim it. I want you to shine for as long as that candle burns. Don’t let it die prematurely because of bad happenings. There’s so much more to love, to live, to enjoy. And while you may not see me at your side anymore, holding onto D/N, I’m right here.”

Charles sniffles, folding his hands over his mouth as he swallows his sobs, while Y/N points to her heart.

“I’m with you forever and always. I’m protecting you and D/N, and I’m watching over you, making sure everything’s alright.” Y/N releases a sigh before chewing at her bottom lip with a wistful smile. “And part of that means making space for more love, for you. You have a big heart, you know? There’s enough room for you to find happiness with someone new. There’s no shame in it, and there’s no guilt in it. It’s what makes being alive such a beautiful thing: your love is yours, and it’s not confined to just one or two people. You can spread it, and still, our love will remain unchanged.”

Tears stream down the sides of Charles' cheeks as he struggles to maintain his composure, his eyes fixated on the screen as if afraid that if he peels his gaze away for one second, his wife will disappear.

Y/N briefly looks off to the side, her attention seemingly caught by something in the room, before snapping her head back to the camera with a bright smile.

“It seems I have to go,” her shoulders sink.

Charles leans forward, the screen mere inches away from his face, as he strokes the outline of Y/N’s face on the screen, whispering desperately, “Please don’t, mon cœur…”

“I love you so, so much. You and D/N are the most precious gifts, the greatest joys I have had the privilege to experience, so please, please,” she claps her hands together, moving them back and forth, “please…when I die, I want you to live.”

Y/N rises from the couch and walks towards the screen, her eyes unwavering for even a moment. “Give my little girl all my love, and kiss and hug her extra tight for as long as you can, for me.”

Offering one final smile, she blows a kiss at the screen. “I love you. Please don’t stop. Don't stop loving and don't stop living.”

The video freezes with Y/N frozen in place, a beautiful smile etched onto her lips, filled with the purest form of love.

Feeling suddenly overwhelmed, Charles collapses, the weight of the world pressing down on him. He drops his face into his hands and releases all of it: sob after sob after sob. There’s something liberating about finally letting go; the burden pours out of him, leaving behind a fragile yet tranquil Charles as he gazes at the still shot of his beloved wife, whom he adores so deeply.

A soft click draws his attention to the door just in time for it to creak open slowly, revealing his little girl standing there, her favourite yellow teddy bear clutched tightly in her arms.

“Papa,” her voice floats like a gentle breeze.

Charles smiles, opening his arms wide as she runs towards him. He's momentarily winded as she reaches him, but he quickly regains his composure and lifts her onto his lap.

“Hello, my love,” he whispers, touching his forehead to hers.

Her tiny hand pats his cheek, her expression filled with concern. “You’re crying?”

Charles shakes his head, trying to reassure her. “Happy tears,” he explains, “look.” He points at the screen, where Y/N's serene face is frozen in time.

“Maman!” D/N exclaims, slipping from his lap and heading towards the screen. Her small hands tap the screen eagerly as she calls out, “Maman! Maman! Maman!”

“Yes,” Charles swallows, ignoring the pang in his chest as he shifts his focus to his little girl. “You want to see Maman, huh?”

He rises from the sofa and lifts D/N into the air, settling her on his hip. “How about we go take a look at the photo albums, okay? There are lots of beautiful pictures of Maman in there, alright?”

“Maman! Maman! Maman!” D/N continues to exclaim, squirming excitedly in his arms as they walk through the door and down the hallway into the living room.

f1gossipofficial

liked by username, username, username and 14,296 others

f1gossipofficial Nine months after the tragic passing of his wife, Y/N, Charles Leclerc has been spotted for the first time on a beach in Spain with their shared daughter.

Witnesses who captured the photographs above mentioned that he appeared to be coping well, and fans respectfully gave them space while appreciating the sight from afar.

We're glad to see Charles out and about again, and we extend our best wishes to him and his family as they continue to navigate these changes.

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username im so glad the fans kept to themselves

username right?? so respectful🫶

username charlie🥹❤️ it's been so long but we'll always be here whenever he's ready

username tbh I was very worried during the radio silence but I think him being out there is a step in the right direction🥲

username still can't believe y/n is no longer here... i miss her sm😭

username omg there's a vid on twitter of them playing ball and u can hear their daughter giggling 💕

username I can't find it could you pls send the link?🙏 username dmed u! username me too pls

username it must be so hard to grief y/n while also trying to be strong for their daughter :( sending him all the strength!!

username 😭😭😭

4:44 ────────────ㅇ 4:44

#f1 smau #f1 fanfic #f1 #f1 x reader #charles leclerc #charles leclerc x reader #cl16 #cl16 x reader #cl16 imagine #f1 imagine #cl16 x you #charles leclerc smau #charles leclerc x female reader #charles x y/n #charles x you #charles leclerc fanfic #smau #charles leclerc angst #charles leclerc imagine #f1 instagram au #fanfic #f1 fic #charles x reader #cl16 fic #f1 scenario #formula 1 x reader #cl16 fanfic #formula 1 fanfic #formula 1 #charles leclerc one shot

[cafterdark]

Posted 16:35, 12/5 to r/puppyplay

How do I get used to nerve integrating tail

So my gf a few weeks ago admitted she was into puppy play. Now I'm a pretty vanilla guy so I was a bit wary, but open to try it. We've gotten a collar and leash that I wear when we play, but I just got my Christmas bonus, so we splurged on a nerve integrating tail. It feels pretty weird to have it on, but my gf is ecstatic. It certainly has brightened up our bedroom life lately. I'm still not entirely into puppy play, especially when she calls me a "good boy" but I do admit it's quite fun. My only question is how do I get used to it.

Posted 22:51, 12/17 to r/puppyplay

Is it dangerous to wear NIT for more than two weeks?

Hello again,

Thanks for all the advice y'all gave me in the last post, I'm really used to the tail now. I love the wave it wags when I'm excited and so does my gf. It has come to the point I feel like I'm missing something when I take it off. I know the general advice is not to keep it on for more than two weeks but I kind of want to keep it on. I work from home so none of my coworkers know I'm wearing it. And when I do need to go out, it's really easy to hide it under some clothes. So is there any risk to having it on for more than two weeks?

Posted 08:11, 1/7 to r/puppyplay

Skin grown over NIT port

So I just woke up and looked at my NIT and saw that skin has grown over the port. Whenever I try to take the tail off it hurts like hell. What can I do?

Posted 09:12, 1/7 to r/medicaladvice

Any way to remove an overgrown nerve integrated prosthetic?

I wore a NIP longer than the recommended time and skin has grown over it, is there any way to take it off?

Posted 18:15 1/7 to r/puppyplay

Gf is okay with permanent NIT

It's been an eventful morning for me and my gf. I told her the news that I'm stuck with a NIT from now on. I expected my gf to leave me, but she's been nothing but supportive. I'm usually not one for being the little spoon, but she cradled me and comforted me. I love her so much. Thank y'all for your kind words and support. I know it's fairly common for people to have eccentric prosthetics nowadays, but as much as I love this tail, it's going to take a while to get used to it. I'll keep y'all updated.

Posted 13:43, 2/9 to r/puppyplay

Side effects of permanent NIT?

Hey again,

So I've gotten used to the NIT being permanent, but I've been having some things happen to me that I'm wondering if they're caused by it.

To start, when I was done with a workout, my gf noticed I was panting with my tongue out. I hadn't even realized I was doing that.

Another one is that my body and facial hair have stopped growing. Not that I miss them, but it's kind of weird. Weirder still, my hair has been growing rapidly. I was starting to bald before, but now it's down to my shoulders. It's gotten so long and full that my coworkers joked that it looked more like a woman's hair.

Are these side effects of the tail or am I just losing my mind?

Posted 12:21, 3/15 to r/puppyplay

More side effects of tail?

Hi

So I know y'all said that permanent tails don't have any mental or physical side effects, but I'm not so sure.

I'm not sure when it started, but I'm starting to make more dog like noises. When I'm excited I bark up a storm, whimper when sad, growl when angry. I'm not doing any of those on purpose, it's like the rise from my throat. When I see a squirrel, I feel the urge to chase after it now. My gf has joked that she needs to collar and leash me when we go out, but I'm a bit nervous.

Speaking of my gf, I used to tower over her. Yet today, she was my height, maybe even a bit taller.

Other strange things, my nipples is a bit swollen and puffy. It really hurts to touch them.

What's happening to me?

Posted 10:23, 3/30 to r/puppyplay

Tits?

So I've been in denial for a while, but my tail is making me grow tits. I realized this when I was putting on a tight shirt and my boobs were really clearly visible. My gf nearly died when she saw them. After a bit of laughing/leering, she measured and found they're A cups. She gave me one of her bras to wear, which feels a bit itchy.

Posted 17:12, 3/31 to r/puppyplay

My tail is feminizing me

Hello again,

After looking at old photos of myself compared to me now. I'm certain my tail is feminizing me. I'm shorter than my gf, my skin is soft, I basically have no body hair, my hair is super long, I have tits, and um, my equipment is tiny now. I look better at least, but idk what to do.

Posted 15:35, 4/10 to r/asktransgender

Why does my GF calling me a "good girl" make me so excited.

So I'm a cis? guy. Due to a faulty prosthetic I'm wearing, it has slowly been feminizing me. Now, I'm having some mixed feelings about it and my gf asked if I liked being a guy. I really hadn't cared about my gender before so I said yeah. She then asked me how I felt about the phrase "good boy." When I told her it made me feel weird and awkward, she called me a good girl. I suddenly got so happy and my prosthetic went wild. My inside felt so warm and complete that I couldn't even try to hide how happy I was. What does this mean? Am I trans?

Posted 11:13, 4/19 to r/asktransgender

New Name!

After a week of introspection with my gf, I've realized I'm a trans woman. And to thank her for all the help she's done making me realize that, I let her pick my name.

So hi, I'm Bella

Posted 22:12, 4/21 to r/puppyplay

Gf acting weird

So me and my gf do a lot of puppy play and usually it stays in the bedroom. But lately it's been weird.

To start, she insists on cooking for me. It's such good food, but what's weird is that whenever I eat it, she clicks something. Weirder still, its the same click that I hear whenever I cum.

Also, she's gotten a lot more dominant lately. She's constantly telling me how cute and hot I am. How much she just wants to mark me up. She insists I wear my collar 24/7 so "Everyone knows who owns me." She even asks me to call her owner sometimes.

I get so flustered and my tail goes wild any time she acts like this but it's still weird. She never used to be this direct and dominant. I'm not against it but it's kind of weird.

Posted 16:37, 4/30 to r/asktransgender

Why do clothes feel weird?

So me and my gf have been clothes shopping for a new wardrobe lately and we've run into a brick wall. Every bit of clothes I've worn lately has felt tight and itchy. Even my old boy clothes.

Why is this?

Posted 18:15, 5/7 to r/puppyplay

Why can't I disobey my owner?

Um, so my owner has made some really big changes to my life lately. She's told me I'm not allowed to wear clothes anymore, sleep on the bed, eat on the table. She's gotten me a dog bed to sleep on and some labeled dog bowls for me to eat out of. I have to wear my collar 24/7 and whenever we go out I need to be leashed. I can't even walk on two legs anymore.

Yet I don't want to disobey her. It's not like she's abusive or anything, the opposite really. But my brain can't even think of not listening to her. Especially when I hear a click and every bit of my brain is filled with devotion to her.

What am I doing wrong, why can't I disobey her?

Posted 11:17, 6/5 to r/puppyplay

Y'all were right

Y'all were right. It's so much better being a good puppy for my owner. I don't have to worry about anything. She's so kind and sweet and wonderful and caring and ugh my tail is wagging so fast just talking about her. I'm so glad I've accepted my place. Thank you all so much for helping me realize this.

Posted 14:25, 12/5 to r/puppyplay

Gifts for a really good Puppygirl?

Hello

I'm the owner of a wonderful little puppygirl. She's had a big year of changes and I want to get her something wonderful to cap it off. Any suggestions?

#t4t lesbian #t4t ns/fw #queer nsft #t4t nsft #lesbian nsft #lesbian ns/fw #mtf ns/fw #wlw nsft #lesbian #bottomposting #puppyposting #puppy sub #bd/sm puppy #dumb puppy #transformation #hornyposting #high effort hornypost #hrt that turns you into a puppygirl #smut

[pomefioredove]

You know what would be sad? If you/Yuu breaks up with Vil (or vice versa) and then runs to Rook afterwards. I wonder if Vil is going to feel betrayed again? If you could do a little scenario for this, that’d be great!

this is such a good prompt, I love rebound scenarios omg. needed this today. and here comes rook with the steel chair!!!

summary: getting dumped by vil schoenheit type of post: long fic characters: rook additional info: romantic, established relationship, vil breaks up with reader, reader is gender neutral, reader is yuu, kinda angsty, hahhhh, my god

"It's not personal. I just don't think it's fair to you," Vil says.

He doesn't fidget. Maintains perfect eye contact. He doesn't even try to act sorry, which, perhaps, is what stings the most.

He's supposed to be an actor, after all.

That's what this is all about.

"You must have always known this was a possibility," he says. "My schedule is getting busier, I simply don't... want to push you away."

Each word is spoken with a honeyed softness, as if he's trying to cushion the blows. It doesn't help.

Your heart thuds in your chest, your eyes burn. This is the worst thing you've ever experienced. You would take a thousand overblots over this. Any day.

What a bitter sentiment.

"You don't mean to push me away. What is this, then?"

A look of guilt finally crosses Vil's face, cracking the mask of professionalism he'd been hiding behind. It offers little comfort.

His brow furrows, and he sighs. "A preventative measure. It would hurt more if I'd waited,"

A million questions fly through your mind, faster than you can catch them. You want to shout, to tell him exactly how he's making you feel, to ask him who he thinks he is- but all you can manage is a stare.

He frowns, extending a hand as if to caress your face, but you turn on your heels and leave before he has the chance.

You wouldn't sit there and let him make a fool of you any longer.

You had become comfortable with the Pomefiore dorm in the past few months, but today, its elegance feels suffocating. The white and gold decor seems to mock you, every vase of perfect flowers laughing at your imperfection as you pass them by.

It hurts.

Stings, burns, makes you feel like you're drowning in a sea of perfume, choking on lilac and rose. Has the air here always been so sickeningly sweet?

There's still a lingering part of you that wants to run back to him, to beg, to negotiate, but you know he's right. You hate that he's right.

This... whatever it was... wouldn't last.

And you'd always known it.

---

How does one recover from being dumped by Vil Schoenheit?

Short answer: you can't.

You can wallow all you want, drowning yourself in the unhealthy foods he forbade you from eating, skipping the classes he'd so encouraged you to excel in, and using cheap tissues on your formerly-perfect skin, but that doesn't change a thing.

Perhaps if it hadn't been so public, you might have pulled yourself together sooner. But the very second all of your pictures were gone from his profile, everyone knew.

On some nights, you'd torture yourself by reading the thirsty comments from desperate fans under his latest posts, all of them pointing out his recent singleness. You would wonder to yourself if you had sounded that pathetic when you were dating Vil.

Just another hopeless, desperate fan, hoping for a piece of him.

People on campus avoided you. Not out of fear, but pity, a lack of knowing what to say. How do you even comfort someone after this?

It was like having an open wound on full display. No matter how you tried to bandage it, it kept bleeding through.

Even Grim was keeping his distance.

What little comfort came in the form of an anonymous knight in shining armor. Roses left at your doorstep, letters of love and encouragement on your assigned seats, little baskets full of your favorite foods and trinkets on your kitchen table...

You would have questioned it if you were not so consumed by your grief. At least the mystery offered a distraction.

"Another one," Ace comments, pulling a letter off your chair before you can sit on it. "Whoever this guy is, he's slick."

He hands you the letter, which you gracefully accept.

Deuce watches cautiously. "And you're sure it's not just... some kinda of prank, right? I've known my fair share of nasty types, this could be a trick."

"Too much effort," you shake your head. "I mean, whoever this is is spending a lot of time and money cheering me up. Not to mention... I've tried looking up some of these poems, and no matches. They're originals."

You wave around the letter in hand, a faint smile tugging at the corners of your lips. "Though, I'm sure whoever's doing it is just being nice,"

"Nice. Right," Ace rolls his eyes. "Cause I know like, a million teenage boys who are just dying to write poetry for their friends."

Even Deuce snickers at that. You roll your eyes.

"Point taken. I guess I just can't believe that anyone would want me after..." you pause. There's no pleasant way to put it, so you let Ace and Deuce fill in the blanks.

"Hey, Vil is a jerk. He doesn't deserve you," Deuce says. "And trust me, if I ever catch him disrespecting you again-"

Ace scoffs. "Woah, there, tiger. Calm down. Vil could kick your ass and we all know it,"

"He really was something, wasn't he?" you sigh, slumping in your seat. Ace and Deuce give each other a panicked look.

"We didn't mean-"

"No, I get it," you say, reaching down to the floor in an attempt to touch your toes. Vil had told you that little exercises help calm the nerves. You hate how you still need his advice.

"Oh, hey, look," you sit back up, another pink envelope in hand. "Another one."

---

There's something about these gifts that doesn't sit right with you.

Each one is arranged to perfection, obviously crafted by a very thoughtful individual, just personal enough to suit your tastes but distant all the same.

It's almost as if the sender is holding something back.

But, not today.

You're greeted by a trail of rose petals leading up to Ramshackle's front door, which itself is ajar. Not uncommon, considering Grim's inability to take care of the makeshift dorm, but with the scent of roses and the candlelight inside, you know it's something more.

You walk in, setting your things aside, and continue following the path of petals into the kitchen, where a rickety wooden table has been set for two.

You, however, are the only one in the room.

"Hello?" you ask, turning in circles. The space is empty, save for a small letter on one of the chairs.

Beautiful,

A little bird told me you doubt the intentions of my admiration. I must amend that immediately, and I see no better way than to say it myself.

Yours truly.

"Trickster," a familiar voice comes from the doorway behind you, and you whirl around to face your admirer.

"Rook!" you gasp, clutching the letter to your chest.

He beams in response. "Oui, c'est moi. Though I was so enjoying the mystery, I feel it's time I made my intentions clear. Sit, please,"

You don't hesitate to follow his suggestion (the surprise left your knees feeling weak, anyway), and he joins you in the adjacent seat.

"But what-"

"Please," he says, holding a finger to your lips to shush you. "Let me start. I first want to say that I have meant every single word, in song and ink, that I have given to you. My heart is true."

Your mind is overflowing with questions, none of which he seems keen on answering in full just yet.

"I have spent the past several months allowing our Beautiful Vil to woo you. I have so enjoyed watching your love blossom from afar, despite my own feelings towards you. But things have changed," Rook says.

"For as much as I love him, this was his own doing. He has made a fatal mistake, one which cannot be undone- he has wounded you, mon amour, in a most vulnerable fashion. Months ago, when we both realized our feelings for you, I willingly stepped aside," he says. "I thought Vil would be the best option for you. I thought I was not ready to commit myself. Now I see what a mistake that was, and I hope you might find it within yourself to forgive me..."

You can only stare back. "Rook..."

"I cannot resent our Roi du Poison for his choice, for it's his to make. But he hurt you dearly, and in the process, he has relinquished his claim on you. I know your wound is still fresh. But, please, Mon Trickster, mon véritable amour, be mine?"

You're silent for a moment, processing every detail of what he said, what he's offering...

He's right. The wound Vil created is still open, and despite the weeks of "recovery", had yet to improve.

If you kept waiting for it to heal, perhaps it never would.

You nod. "Okay. Okay! But-! Let's take it slow, okay?"

Rook just barely manages to stop himself from leaping across the table to take your hands into his, and he reaffirms your request with a nod.

"Of course, mon cœur. What is a hunter if not patient?"

---

Pomefiore is beautiful again.

There are still times where you swear you can see Vil staring at the two of you, a look of discontent on his face, from across the room.

He doesn't utter a word about the way Rook has his arm over your shoulder, or the many terms of endearment he uses on you, though he doesn't have to. The lingering guilt and regret has made a home for itself in Vil Schoenheit.

You're sure Rook has noticed by now, too, although this isn't the first time he's pulled something like this on the housewarden without a second thought, and it likely won't be the last.

Perhaps it's for the better.

#twst x reader #twisted wonderland x reader #queued #rook hunt x reader #can't stop thinking of the logistics of this bc if rook and vil both liked the mc at the same time they would NEVER fight over it #rook would totally let vil go ahead and then either become vilyuu number one fan OR polycule OR be there to steal mc when vil fucks up #and alas polycule is probably the least likely because vil would Not Want to Share

[yanderenightmare]

can we have more yan DEKU who terrorises his exgirlfriend? like, he sends her creepy letters and gifts, without mentioning it's him of course, scaring her straight back into his arms??

Deku - Midoriya Izuku

TW: yandere, hints of dubcon/noncon, size difference, stalker, mental abuse

Green Paisley

You’d felt watched lately, and things were rarely where you remembered putting them. But thinking it was all in your head, you’d ignored it until you received the first gifts and saw the pictures. Eyes peeled while reading the letter with a shaky hand covering your mouth, you dropped everything on the steps to your apartment when quickly reaching for your phone.

I wasn’t going to write you any letters. I was happy just watching because I knew you were already spoken for. But I’ve noticed that the green-haired guy hasn’t come over lately, and I feel so sad knowing you’re home all alone…

You contact the police, but all they tell you is to invest in a new alarm system. After a little crying at the station, they show you enough sympathy to post a squad car in your neighborhood – but all in all, you’d say they didn’t seem very convinced.

That green-haired guy is a fucking moron. If you were mine, I would never let you go. I would take care of you, much better than he ever could. I would give you only the prettiest gifts and call you only the sweetest names. I’d treat you how someone like you deserves to be treated. Keep you safe and sound and happy to be mine…

You read the stalker’s letter again while browsing ways to upgrade your security – your thumb in your mouth, nail bending where you chewed on it – eyes panning over the photos that came in the box. Taken through the window – some innocent enough, candid pictures of you cooking in the kitchen or watching a movie on the couch. 

Others were not so innocent.

Your nail broke between your teeth as you looked at the revealing pics of you in your bedroom – wearing nothing but flimsy underwear. 

You looked back to the screen and continued scrolling through deals – but more than that, you were trying to distract yourself from what you really wanted to do…

Izuku had always been a source of comfort when it came to safety, and you know he’d come if you called, but since you broke up with him only a couple of months ago it seemed too selfish to ask. Besides, the reasons you broke things off were all because of his derogatory tendencies, and to beg him over because of something like this would only prove his point.

You couldn’t call him over. He’d see it as a win, and you’d decided you wouldn’t lose to his patronizing ways any longer. You needed to do this on your own – without his help.

You had to wait through the weekend until Monday to call a guy. A new box came both days, each one more terrifying than the last. But after installing a new alarm system you felt a little safer.

But the next box stripped that safety away.

I know I must be creeping you out. After all, you have no idea who I am, whereas I know you so intimately. But you shouldn’t feel scared. I would never hurt you. My gift to you today is proof of that.

P.S. Security systems aren’t enough to keep me away from you. 

Beneath the letters were more pictures of you – this time sleeping – inside the house. 

You fell apart – caving in, calling Izuku in tears, begging him to come over in a hurry. “Izu- please, please, please come home-”

He’s sitting on your couch only a curt fifteen minutes later, a tight arm around your midriff, holding you close for comfort while you sobbed against his chest – a furl deepened his brows while reading, holding your stalker’s letters in the other hand with green eyes narrowing for every sentence he finished.

I dream of making you mine. As I watch you sleep, I wonder what you dream of. You look so lonely lying there. Maybe if I keep you company, you’ll start dreaming of me too.

“How many of these have you received?” He questioned when done, looking around at the gift wrap on the floor, green-paisley-patterned, and the several boxes filled with crepe and untouched pieces of what looked like different arrangements of lingerie, candy, and sex toys.

“Four, I think…” You muffled against his tear-soaked shirt, clinging to him with your legs tucked onto his lap.

“Four? Why didn’t you call me sooner?” He echoed, looking down at you with heavy curls shadowing his eyes.

You looked up at him through the blur, lip sucked between your teeth before answering. “I- I went to the police-”

“The police? You went to the police instead of calling me?” He cut you off harshly, making you flinch.

“I-I-” You stuttered, crying, and he shook from his misplaced anger and took your face in his palms.

“Shh-sh- I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to yell at you.” He apologized with a kiss on your forehead before pulling you close to his chest again. “It’s just… this is exactly what I warned you about. You should have called me sooner.”

“I’m sorry.” You whimper, calming down to the warm strokes his large hand smoothed across your back.

“Shh- it's okay… I’m here now… and I'm not gonna let any sicko touch you. I promise.” He soothed – his voice a calm and strong anchor for you to grip onto. “Come, I’ll help you pack a bag. You’ll sleep at my place tonight.”

“Okay…” You sniffle. “Thank you.”

He drove with only one hand on the steering wheel, the other on your lap, holding your hand – your bag by your feet – and you’re reminded of the first days you started dating. Sleepovers and overnight bags – his hand between your thighs on the drive.

His new place is bigger than the last – like something out of a magazine. Modern and simplistic – a little too clean, maybe, but very stylish. 

You knew he’d been climbing the ranks a couple of spots a week since you broke up with him, but you hadn’t known the new paychecks could afford something like this. It made you feel a little guilty thinking about it, then a little embarrassed, causing you to flush – standing there in guest slippers, bag in hand – your presence sticking out like a sore thumb.

“You hungry?” He asked, shaking you out of your meekness, where you looked up with a small nod and a slight hum.

He smiled, turning to the kitchen. You were so cute.

At dinner, it almost feels like old times. Izuku plays with your legs under the table even though you give him a look. He gets you to giggle after a while, surrendering to his hopeless flirting. You help him carry the dishes after you’ve finished – and even though he has a washer now, you slip right into that old routine and start filling the sink with warm water and soap. And then you stand there, the two of you – shoulder to elbow, and your chest flutters, wondering if he was always that tall.

You blushed and ducked your head, not wanting him to see you getting so flustered. You pretended to be throwing some scraps in the trash and that's when your eyes caught hold of it.

Green paisley.

You’re stunned for a moment. Still crouched down, your head hovering over the trash – face blank, body still.

“You weren’t meant to see that.” Came a voice.

Izuku stood next to you. Washcloth in hand, dripping soapsuds on the floor.

You’re breath shivers in your throat, and you drop to the ground with a gulp, looking up at him – now with building fear accenting your still shocked expression.

You blink a couple of times, trying to make sense of it but getting nowhere. “W-why?” Left you then, along with sudden tears that started slipping down your cheeks.

And it really was the only question you had. Why would he do this? Why would he torment you like that? Why would he-

“’Cause you left… And I needed a way to get you back.”

You cringed. Feeling sick – almost sick enough to turn around and throw up the entire dinner in the trashcan, all over that stupid green paisley print. But you didn’t. “You’re pathetic.” – is what you said instead.

You got up from the floor. Upset tears still rolled down your face, but you were mostly just pissed – kicking off your guest slippers, you sat down atop the shoe bench and started doing your laces.

“I’m leaving. Don’t call me. If I ever see you near my place, I’m calling the cops.” You uttered, grabbing your bag before yanking the door handle.

It didn’t budge – some strange new type of locking mechanism, which really made no sense to have on the inside.

“I’m going home, Izuku. Unlock the door.” You huffed, turning around to look at him sourly, only he’d approached you all too silently – making you gasp to see him standing right behind you.

“You’re not going anywhere…”

You’re taken to the bed, kicking and screaming – then pinned by hands thrice the size of your own beneath the big-boned body they belonged to. And now you’re really feeling scared.

Before, it had been such a distant threat – something you could pretend wasn’t there for most of the day and otherwise deal with by the soothing presence of a weapon in your house or a quick phone call to the police. But now – there was no comfort to be found anywhere.

“Shh, baby~ don’t fuss. It’s better this way.” He tried soothing, holding your fighting wrists tightly above your head in one fist. The other kept your lips shut, muffling all screams. Barring your thrashing legs beneath his own. “You need me- you couldn’t even last a single week without calling me.” He justified, hunched over you with his mouth only an inch above the knuckles draping your mouth. “But that’s alright, I don’t mind it. I always planned on taking care of you.” He cooed, rubbing his nose sweetly against yours despite you trying to shake away from it. 

You felt something rub against your thigh, and you knew all too well what it was. Fat tears streamed down your cheeks, facing the next events.

But Izuku shared none of your discomforts, rocking the bump against you with a moan slipping into his rant. “You like the new place I got, don’t you? You can stay in all day- I’d give you all you’d ever need or want- you’d be so comfortable you wouldn’t ever even want to leave-”

He sounded just like the letters.

And where it had ached you to know that he’d been the one to write them all… now it terrified you to understand how he’d meant every last word of it, too.

#yandere bnha #yandere boku no hero academia #yandere mha #yandere my hero academia #yandere midoriya x reader #yandere midoriya #yandere midoriya izuku #yandere deku x reader #yandere deku #yandere izuku #yandere deku x y/n #daddy deku #deku x reader #deku x you #yandere izuku x reader #yandere izuku midoriya #izuku x reader #izuku midoria x reader #deku smut #izuku smut #midoriya x reader #izuku midoriya smut #midoriya smut #deku x y/n #yandere

[joelsgreys]

lean on me

Post Outbreak! Joel Miller x Female Reader

series masterlist

summary: It's been three months since you and Joel left your baby daughter with Bill and Frank in Lincoln; you aren't coping well and Joel tries to help you get through it.

pairing: Joel Miller x Female Reader

warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, MINORS DNI. BOSTON QZ ERA ((TW)) though it is not explicitly stated, it is implied reader is suffering from postpartum depression. mentions of being unable to breastfeed. angst, hurt, comfort, tiniest hint of fluff at the end.

word count: 3.7k

a/n: this was only meant to be a short drabble, but it ended up getting longer than i anticipated. sorry for more angst.

September, 2020

Joel had known things would get bad.

But he hadn’t expected for them to get this fucking bad.

He glanced across the table at Tess, quietly asking, “She eat today?”

Tess let out a small sigh, shaking her head. “Nope.” She picked up her chipped, ceramic mug and took a sip of crappy, two decades old dark roast coffee and stated, “She didn’t eat anything yesterday, either. Or the day before that or the one before that. I can barely get her to take a fucking sip of water these days.”

“Fuckin’ hell, Tess! We can’t just sit around watchin’ her starve herself,” he hissed at her, his hands curling into fists on the table. 

She shot him an irritated look. “You think I don’t know that already?”

“Tess—”

“What are we going to do, Joel? Pin her down and force feed her?”

Joel’s jaw clenched, his lips pressing together in a tight, thin line. He glanced over at you with a heavy, sinking feeling inside of his chest at the mere sight of your current state. 

You were sitting on the bed in the same pair of gray sweatpants you’d been wearing for the last couple of days, your knees pulled up to your chest as you stared blankly, vacantly, out of the window beside you at absolutely nothing. You were beginning to appear frail—the current tone of your skin was so dull, so washed out that anybody who took one glance at you would probably think that you had spent your entire life locked away in some basement, never having seen the fucking sunshine before. The pallor of your skin was only emphasized by the dark, bruise-like circles underneath your eyes, courtesy of the long and sleepless nights you’d been having, especially lately. 

You had fallen deep into a sadness, a darkness—one so deep that you had become nothing but a mere shadow of your former self. You were an empty shell of a human being and it was starting to scare the fucking shit out of Joel. 

“Maybe if we took her to see the baby?” Tess suggested, quietly. She took another sip of her coffee and then set her mug down. “Frank has been wondering why you two haven’t been over there to see her. Hell, even Bill is curious why I’ve been going over there alone.” After having done some digging around, Tess managed to find someone in the QZ who had helped her get her hands on homemade infant formula; it was worth gold and only ever went to officials of a higher ranking who could actually afford it. Somehow, she’d pulled a few strings and the next thing Joel knew, Tess was loading a pack full of cans to take over to Lincoln. She’d made a couple more trips since then, and each time, she had gone alone. “It’s been over three months, Joel. Maybe it’s finally time—maybe it would help her.”

“In her condition?” Joel shook his head, adamantly. “No. For one, she wouldn’t fuckin’ make it a mile down the road before collapsing—from exhaustion, from starvation, you name it. And even if she could make the trip somehow, the truth is, she’s not ready to see her.” He lowered his voice to keep you from overhearing him, although at this point, he was certain that you were too zoned out to even pay attention. Every word was probably going in through one ear and out the other. “I hate to say it, but she’s just not strong enough to see her yet, Tess.”

“And what about you, Texas? What’s your excuse?”

He glared at her. “You really think I can leave her here alone in a state like this while we go skippin’ off to Lincoln together?”

“Good point.” Tess paused and peered curiously at him. “You haven’t even told her what they named her, have you?”

“Don’t think that’s such a good idea right now, either.” Joel held back a heavy sigh as he looked down into his own mug of shitty coffee. A huge part of him wished that she hadn’t told him what Bill and Frank ended up naming the baby. Since then, his daughter’s name echoed in the back of his mind, over and over again, damn near constantly.

“Joel, if we don’t do something, she’s going to wind up—” Tess could see his jaw clench again and she stopped herself, choosing her words more carefully. “She’s walking on thin ice. She’s not eating, she’s not sleeping. She’s already been in lockup twice this week alone because she can’t even keep up with work detail anymore. I know this is hard for you to hear, but if something doesn’t change soon, things are only going to get worse from here—she’ll get worse. You’re the only one of the two of us who actually has a chance of getting through to her and you need to fucking do something.”

“Tess, I’ve tried—”

“Well fucking try harder, Joel. If you don’t, you’ll fucking lose her. You know that, right?”

“I know.” Joel rubbed his face tiredly with both of his hands. He knew it was nothing but the truth that she was speaking, but goddamn the truth fell onto his shoulders heavy, almost too heavy. It felt as though he were carrying the weight of the entire fucking planet. But she was right. If something wasn’t done, he was going to lose you. “Tess, you mind if I have a minute alone with her?”

She nodded and took one last gulp of coffee before standing up from the table. “Yeah. I have to go see Robert and a couple of his buffoons about something anyway.” As she walked past him towards the door, she stopped and tossed him a pointed look. “Maybe today is the day that you finally decide to give her that thing that you’ve been carrying around in your pocket,” she suggested. “We went through a lot of shit for it, Joel. It’s the reason we have been drinking crappier coffee than usual for the last two weeks.”

He nodded, watching her as she grabbed her jacket and left.

After a minute or two, Joel finally pushed himself away from the table and rose to his feet. He made his way over to you, and he wasn’t even the slightest bit surprised at how you didn’t turn to acknowledge him despite the sound of his heavy boots on the creaking hardwood floor. He said your name as he came closer to you, but you remained as still as a stone statue, your eyes still fixed outside of the window.

“Alright,” he said, standing next to you at the side of the bed, both of his hands placed firmly on his hips. “Enough is fuckin’ enough. I can’t and I won’t let you keep carryin’ on like this. Either you get up and get your ass over to that table and eat somethin’ or I’m going to pick you up off of this bed, take you over there, and feed you myself. And don’t think I won’t. I’ll tie you down to the chair if that’s what I’ve gotta do.”

Finally, you turned to look at him. You spoke, your voice sounding just as fragile as you looked. “I’m not hungry.”

Joel’s expression immediately softened.

Fuck. 

He couldn’t be tough on you, not in the state you were in—he thought being hard on you would be the way to get through to you, but he just didn’t have it in him to be stern with you, not when you were like this.

“Baby. Please.” He knelt down beside you, reaching for your hand. He winced at how frigid your hand felt in his palm, as if he were holding a block of ice. He brought his other hand up and placed it on top, doing his best to warm it up with both of his. “Look, I get it. I know that you miss her. I know that you’re hurtin’ over her. You might not think I get it, but I do.” He paused, feeling sick to his stomach upon noticing the lifelessness in your eyes. He almost wished that he could see you cry, because at least he would know for certain that you were still in there somewhere—but Joel hadn’t seen you shed a single tear since you’d broken down sobbing in his arms that night in Lincoln. “You just can’t keep goin’ on like this. You don’t eat, you’ve barely slept in weeks. You keep fallin’ behind with all your work assignments and you’ve landed yourself in lockup more times than I can fuckin’ count because of it.”

You simply shrugged, as if you couldn’t give two shits about any of it.

Joel managed to bite back his sigh of frustration. He knew that losing his temper would do nothing more than sink you further into the hole you were currently in. But he was angry. He was just so fucking angry about about everything. Here you were, just slipping right through his fucking fingers, slowly fading away right before his own two eyes and he didn’t know what to do to stop it from happening. He felt lost. He felt hopeless—useless. 

He squeezed your hand out of desperation. He would fucking plead if he had to. “I need you to fuckin’ snap out of it. Please,” he begged, as he continued holding your hand tightly, holding onto it as if he were holding onto dear life itself. “Please, for the love of fuckin’ god, I need you to just snap out of it. If not for yourself, fuckin’ do it for me—do it for her.”

“Snap out of it?” You repeated. “You want me to just snap out of it?”

“Baby, please just listen to me for one goddamn second—”

You snatched your hand out of both of his. “I can’t just fucking snap out of it, Joel!” You nearly shouted at him, speaking the loudest he’d heard you speak in several weeks. “Alright? I can’t snap out of it! My heart is shattered into pieces, don’t you fucking understand that?”

“‘Course I do. Givin’ her up was hard for me too,” he reminded you quietly, resisting the urge to match your tone. 

“And I don’t deny that,” You prefaced yourself. “I know it was hard on you too, Joel. But you’re not the one who came this close, this damn fucking close to aborting her.” You held up your index finger and your thumb close together. You’d started trembling as everything seemed to catch up to you all at once—sleep deprivation, malnourishment and of course, the emotions you had been bottling up inside of you for the last three months. “You’re not the one who carried her inside of your womb for almost nine months, who felt every one of her flutters and her kicks. You’re not the one who had to go through the excruciating pain of giving birth to her in this crumbling apartment, only to have to place her in someone else’s arms and leave her behind three days later. You’re not the one who had to deal with the aftermath, Joel. Do you know how much it fucking hurt not to be able to feed her? How much it fucking sucked to have to wait for your milk supply to dry up because you no longer had a baby to feed?”

For the first time in a long time, Joel was left speechless. 

He didn’t know what to say. Hell, there was nothing he could say.

Because you were absolutely fucking right.

None of what you’d just said to him was a lie. Of course he knew that giving the baby up had been a hundred times harder on you than it’d been on him—mentally, emotionally, and even physically. He thought back to the nights when he would see you sitting there with your own arms wrapped around your chest, knowing you were aching, knowing that although you said nothing about it, you were in unbearable pain from being unable to breastfeed. 

And what could he do about it?

Not a goddamn fucking thing.

Still, Joel had tried. He always made the attempt to comfort you, only to be shot down time and time again. He’d been so used to being the one who rejected any kind of support that, when the tables had been turned on him, he hadn’t known how to handle it. Joel could feel the guilt slowly creeping in as he wondered if perhaps he just hadn’t tried hard enough for you. He was your partner—it was his duty to take care of you, to look out for you, to protect you, and yet here he was, failing to do any of that. 

He could have done more. 

He should have done more.

Especially after all the friction he’d caused from the beginning of your pregnancy. From letting you go to those crooked motherfuckers for a procedure that could have cost you your life, down to the way he had treated you the night you’d brought up Sarah, it seemed as though all Joel had been doing was fucking up, time after time. 

Seeing the expression on Joel’s face, you immediately knew what he must have been thinking. Your eyes widened and you quickly uttered a nearly breathless apology. “Joel, I’m so fucking sorry—”

He stopped you, tightly shaking his head. “No, don’t be. It’s true, it’s all fuckin’ true.”

Finally, after three months of bone-dry eyes, a warm tear slipped out, falling down the side of your face. Your entire body shuddered as the flood gates opened and more followed in suit, each one falling faster, harder than the last. The next thing you knew, Joel had pulled himself up onto the mattress beside you, pulling you into his arms just as you had started sobbing. With one hand, he delicately cradled the back of your head as you cried and cried into his shoulder. The other rubbed a soothing circle into your back over and over again. 

And just like that night in Lincoln, Joel just held you, waiting patiently as you finally allowed yourself to release each and every single one of your emotions out into the open. He didn’t say a word to you, nor did he attempt to stop the tears—he just held you close, merely using his touch to silently let you know that he would wait as long as he had to until you were finished.

“Joel,” You sniffed his name, your hands clutching fistfuls of his shirt.

“I’m right here, baby,” he assured you, holding you even closer against him, as close as humanly possible. His heartbeat was right in your ear and you closed your eyes, listening to it and letting it calm you. “I told you I wasn’t gonna let you carry this pain alone, darlin’. You remember that?”

You nodded against his chest, whispering, “I remember.”

“Well then, you’ve gotta let me help you,” Joel said into your hair. “For three months, I’ve been tryin’ but you just keep pushin’ me away. It doesn’t work like that. I need you to lean on me. I need for you to let me back in and help you because the road you’re headin’ down right now is a dangerous one.” 

Opening your eyes, you pulled away from him slightly, just far enough to meet his worried gaze. You could see the absolute fucking hell that you had been putting him through and felt your heart clench painfully inside of your chest. “I know I can’t keep going on like this, Joel,” You admitted softly to him. “Believe me, I know that. I tried so hard to get a fucking grip. There have been so many days where I think to myself, today is the day that I’m going to get my shit together. But then I just think of her sweet and innocent little face and I just fall apart all over again.” You muffled another sob with the palm of your hand.

“Oh, baby.” He gave your body a gentle, but firm squeeze. If he could take your pain away, all of it, and carry it along with his own, he would do it in a fucking heartbeat. 

You swallowed harshly. “I know she is far better off where she is, Joel, I know that she is. I never want her falling into the hands of FEDRA. It kills me to think of her being here in this shitty fucking place, going to their shitty fucking school.” Your voice broke at the mere thought of it all. “We know what would happen, Joel. As soon as she comes of age and meets their requirement, they will put her through their recruiting program. After her training, they either deem her worthy of becoming a fucking ruthless officer or they will give her the shittiest civilian jobs making her work for scraps of nothing, the same way they do to us.”

Joel sighed, rubbing your back again. “I know, baby. I know. It’s why we did what we did. We did what we had to do to spare her from that shit.”

“But then there’s this selfish part of me that wants her back so badly, so fucking badly that it makes me fucking ache,” You confessed, guilt lacing your tone of voice. “I just want the hurt to stop. I want to be at peace with the decision that we made, but the way I miss her, it feels almost impossible. I feel like I’ll never be able to accept that this is the way things have to be.”

“You have to accept it—we have to accept it. We ain’t got a choice,” Joel spoke the truth to you as gently as he could, though he knew it wouldn’t make a difference.

“I know,” You whispered, your eyes glazing over with fresh tears.

He stared at you for a moment and then pressed his lips against your forehead. Deciding it was time to show you what he’d been keeping a secret from you, Joel reached into the pocket of his jeans, pulling out a small, crumpled up wad of brown tissue paper. With one of his arms still around you, he used both of his hands to unwrap the tissue paper only to reveal a delicate silver chain—a bit too old to be shiny, but still in good shape nonetheless. Joel picked it up and tossed the tissue off to the side. He held it up in front of you to give you a better look at it. 

A single white pearl hung from the chain. 

“Joel, where did you get this?” You gasped lightly, taking it from him with trembling fingers. You didn’t even want to know what the hell he must have had to do or trade for it. Sure, jewelry was one of the most useless items that anyone could possess in this world because it no longer had any monetary value, but if someone wanted something bad enough and another person had it, then advantage was going to be taken somewhere, somehow. 

“Don’t you worry ‘bout that, darlin’.”

You glanced up at him, an incredulous look in your eyes. “Joel.”

He almost chuckled, knowing you wouldn't let him off that easy. “I’d mentioned to Tess that I wanted to get you somethin’ special to carry around with you, somethin’ that would remind you of her. Tess said a pearl was the birthstone for June, and so I asked her to help me find one a few weeks ago. She found some guy and I cut a deal for it. But that’s all I’m tellin’ you.”

Joel took the necklace from you and beckoned for you to turn around for him. Moving your hair aside, he reached around you and clasped it at the back of your neck. “I’d rather only you wear it when you’re here in the apartment. Once you go outside, it stays hidden in your pocket so no one sees it, alright?”

You turned back around to face him. “I don’t even know what to say. I can’t believe you did this for me, Joel.” You reached for his hands and held them tightly in your own as you shot him a sincere, grateful look. “Thank you.”

He leaned forward, lightly brushing his mouth against yours. “Baby?”

“Yes?” You murmured against his lips.

Joel squeezed your hands, hesitating for a moment before he said, “I know I’ve only ever said it to you once—that night. Outside of Bill and Frank’s place. But I need you to know that I love you. The truth is, I’ve been lovin’ you for a long time now. Never had it in me to admit it, not even to myself.” His eyes met yours in such a tender way that you felt a part of your broken heart begin to heal itself. It was just a small part, and you knew that unless you had your daughter back, it would never mend itself completely. Still, it was enough to give you a sense of hope. It was just enough to remind you that you would be able to find the strength in you to survive this pain. If you had any reason to keep going, it was right there it front of you. It was Joel. “I love you. I’m gonna do everythin’ that I can to help you through this. All you’ve gotta do is lean on me, alright?”

“I love you, Joel.” Though you’d said it to him once before, it still felt a bit foreign to say out loud.

It felt right, though. And it felt right hearing him say it to you. 

Reaching up, you lightly clasped the pearl in your hand. You leaned into Joel’s chest and felt him wrap his arms around you. 

“Y’know,” Joel said, breaking the momentary silence that had fallen over you, “Tess said Frank’s been wondering why we haven’t been over to see her yet. I know it might still be a bit too soon for you, but—” He let his sentence trail.

Though he didn’t say it out loud, you could hear it in his voice.

He wanted to see the baby.

“I’m not ready for that just yet,” You admitted. “I want to see her more than anything, but look at me. I’m a fucking mess.” You paused, clutching onto the pearl a little tighter. “Maybe we can try in a few weeks? What do you think?”

Joel kissed the top of your head. “Soon as you’re ready, say the word and we’ll go.”

#joel miller x you #joel miller x reader #joel miller imagine #joel miller angst #joel miller hbo #joel miller pedro pascal #joel miller x female reader #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x wife!reader #joel miller x y/n #joel miller drabble #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller fic #fic: tdtrt

[cyberkinks]

𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐈𝐃𝐀𝐘 𝐒𝐔𝐑𝐏𝐈𝐒𝐄 ︙ 𝐊𝐈𝐌 𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐘𝐔 {KINKMAS}・♡

⤷︎︎ 𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐥𝐮𝐝𝐞𝐬, wom!reader, fiancé!mingyu. surprises, him being the kind man he is, him meeting your family and friends, you two being lovebirds throughout this, kissing, sexual interactions, multiple sex scenes, your mom scolding you. ✨

⤷︎︎ 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬, use of foul language, use of pet names (maybe), misspellings (maybe. english isn’t my first language). 🎄

⤷︎︎ 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞, smut, fluff, CEO au. ⛄️

⤷︎︎ 𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲, christmas. a wonderful time of the year that you share with your precious family and in this case, your fiancé. you honestly felt as if mingyu forgot about the week you two were supposed to visit your family in LA but little did you know. ❄️

⤷︎︎ 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐫!, this is for entertainment purposes only! 🌨️

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: ❛Hello, loves. I know it's been a while but I'm back with a longer imagine this time. hope you all enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed writing it for all of you. I still have more things in the works so look out for it! love you all, merry chrismas (if u celebrate), and happy new year! muwah! (I'll try to post for new years as well!) ♡ ❜ ☃️

𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐨𝐟𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝: no, unedited.

It was kinda expected and you were torn apart but you kept a smile on your face around your family since you didn’t want them to know.

mingyu promised to come with you to LA to visit your parents since he’s never met them and as always, his schedule said otherwise and he was 'disappointed' also. you had left days before chrismas since it was gonna be a long flight plus you needed to help out your mom.

you looked around as your family mingled and talked amongst each other but you kept your life private which means it would’ve been an even bigger surprise since they didn’t even know you’d thought about dating. you were the most career focused person they knew.

you sat there trying to maintain a happy face but it eventually failed and your face turned sad at the thought of Mmngyu not being able to come.

your mom noticed and came over and sat down by you. “everything alright?” she asked with a look of concern and you nodded immediately, covering up your true feelings. “yeah, I’m fine.” you reassured her and flashed her a small smile.

she looks at you and chuckles. “y/n, I can tell when you’re not fine.” caught. she caught you in your “I’m okay” act and you sigh deeply. “it’s just….someone was supposed to come but…” you didn’t know how to finish off your sentence without ruining the surprise. “the person couldn’t make it.” you look down at your coffee mug before taking a sip.

“and why not?” she asks “they’re just…busy busy.” you replied trying your best not to spoil anything. “I see and this person is making you this upset? must be important.” you raise an eyebrow at her words, wondering if she knew already.

she winks at you before walking off and you shake your head, trying to clear your thoughts and have a good time but it was hard with mingyu being on your mind so you pick up your phone from the table and sent him a quick “I miss you” message then sat your phone face down back on the table.

soon, the doorbell rings throughout the house and you look over and see your mom going to answer it. you think nothing of who it might be until you hear that familiar voice and you stand up and walk into the living room from the dining room only to see mingyu standing there with his bags in his hands. “Sorry I’m late.” he says softly before kissing your forehead as you stand there in shock “the traffic was terrible” he continued. “I thought you said you were handing things today.” I ask him with a confusing frown.

he smiles down at you. “I wanted to surprise you, love. I took a few days off.” a smile appears on your face and you lean in and kissed his lips softly. “this is one hell of a surprise.” you say with a smile before looking back and seeing most of your family standing there. “oh sorry, uh mingyu this is my mom, (F/N). mom, this is my fiancé, mingyu” you stand aside watching as they greet each other.

soon after, you introduce him to your dad, (F/N) then the rest of your family as you hold onto his arm.

After introducing him, you two sat down on the sofa looking around. you look over at him. “I honestly thought you forgot.” you spoke softly and he chuckled softly at your words. “I know but I would never, i know how important this was for you.” said mingyu with a soft smile across his lips and you smiled back before pecking his lips “well, I’m glad.” you grabbed his hand, intertwining your fingers with his and he kisses your temple.

you couldn’t have been more happier in this moment. surrounded by your fiancé, friends, and family. being together with him on your favorite holiday was all you needed for christmas.

・ ・ ・ 𝐀 𝐅𝐄𝐖 𝐇𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐒 𝐋𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐑, it was now 11 PM and everyone went to bed early and it was just you and mingyu awake in the guest bedroom.

you were relaxed and laid back against the headboard, watching TV in your nightgown, rubbing your legs against the silk sheets trying to get comfortable as you waited for mingyu to finish up showering.

you couldn’t sleep without him being next to you. you were slightly clingy.

when you hear the water turning off, a smile forms on your lips but what happens next is something you didn’t expect. you looked up and saw him with a towel around his waist as water dripped down from his body and his hair, running down his abs and his neck.

you closed your legs at the sight before looking away not being able to handle the view and a light laugh came from his lips. “can’t handle what you see?” he says in a low whisper and you chuckle before looking back over at him. “of course I can, I just…it’s different.” you clear your throat before facing the tv again, trying to get your mind off what your eyes just saw.

“different? how so, love?” mingy says in a seductive tone before drying the water from his body and you take a deep breath. “I’m not sure what I meant by that either.” you say pulling the covers down a little, trying to show him what you were wearing and he raises an eyebrow. “now? In your parent's house?” he says as he climbs onto the bed, hovering over you. “such a bad girl, aren’t you?” he moves closer, positioning himself between your legs.

you bite your lips at his words before nodding as your hands rest on his shoulders now, feeling his cock resting against your thigh as he leans in closer, moving his head down to your neck and placing soft kisses and leaving love marks behind. “wanting me to fuck you right now..” he whispers against your skin, sending shivers down your spine.

your body was heating up at this point. your underwear were now soaked in your own juices. his hands grabs onto your hips, pulling you closer towards his own body.

“please, mingyu.” you breathe out, rubbing on his shoulders and biting down on your bottom lip after.

“please what, sweetheart?” his lips trails down to your collarbone, kissing on it softly while his hands slide up your gown tugging at the hem of your underwear.

you felt as if you were slowly losing control at the way he was teasing you. his thumbs trace circles on your hips, trying to contain himself since there were other people here.

“Mmmph, i need you.” a soft whine escapes your lips. a soft smirk appeared across his lips. “do you now?” he said in a low and husky manner before moving back and slowly pulling your underwear off. he smiled at how wet you already were for him and threw your underwear on the floor.

with his two fingers, he spreads your wetness around your clit then carefully dips his fingers inside of you making a sharp gasp leave your lips.

mingyu slowly thrusts them into you, prepping you for him as he bites down on his bottom lip. he loved listening to the sounds you made and knowing it was him that could only make you feel this way excited him more. he watch as you squirm underneath him “b-babe.” you moan softly, wanting to squeeze your thighs together but he stops you before leaning down between your legs and wraps his lips around your clit sucking on it gently and you quickly cover your mouth to prevent yourself from waking everyone up.

you look down watching as he pleasures you. he grabs ahold of your thighs, pulling you closer. he begins to devour you as if it were his last meal.

he moans softly against your folds, diving deeper as he continues to hold you in place. his tongue laps at your clit over and over again. he loved the way you taste on his tongue. you tried your best to suppress your moans, trying your best to keep quiet but he was visibly making that hard.

your thighs begin to shake while your hole starts to pulse. you felt your orgasm approaching just by him using his tongue. you were almost there but he quickly moved his mouth from your folds.

his chin and lips were covered in your juices. he licked it all off his lips before leaning down to kiss yours softly, letting you taste yourself as he lines himself up with your aching hole. “ready, my love?” he whispers against your lips and you nod quickly, your eyes were full of lust along with his.

he carefully slid himself inside of you, grunting instantly at how wet you were meanwhile you covered your mouth once again, trying your best not to moan loudly as he stretched you out.

“Oh god..” You gasp, gripping his shoulders for dear life. “I could cum like this..” he groans pushing his cock further into you, filling you up to the brim.

his forehead rests against yours as he slowly thrusts into you, letting you get used to his size while waiting for your cue.

after a few more slow thrusts, you nod for him to speed up his pace and he does at that moment. he grabs your legs, pinning them down on both sides of your torso.

your head went back, moaning softly into the air as you grabbed onto his shoulders tightly. “m-mingyu!” a whimper left your lips.

“you’re so fucking tight, sweetheart.” he moans, leaning in closer. the bed creaks at how fast he is going as the headboard thuds against the wall.

you knew by now that your parents knew what was going on since the guest room was next to theirs and you cursed inside your head knowing your mom was going to scold you about it today. you began to scratch at his back, moaning a little louder and he shushed you with his lips, grunting into the kiss as his pace quickened.

"you're so fucking deep!" you mewl, looking down and watching as he pumps into you with sharp and quick thrusts.

his hands grab onto your hips tighter. "(Y/N).." he grunts, throwing his head back this time. you could feel your orgasm building up and the pressure was becoming too much and it wasn't long until it finally broke loose and flooded all over his cock. you gripped onto his back tightly as your orgasms hit you like a freight train. your walls tightened up squeezing him tighter.

“fuck, (Y/N)…” he muttered through the kiss, releasing his thick ropes of cum into you and you panted heavily as he let go of your legs.

once your breathing settles down he kisses your sweaty forehead softly, his heart beating out of his chest as he holds you close. “I love you so much." he whispers “I love you, too, mingyu.” you smile, holding him tightly. after everything was settled, you both lay down in silence, listening to each other's heartbeat.

"my moms gonna absolutely scold me." you mumble softly before drifting off to sleep and he chuckles at your words before kissing your forehead one last time before falling asleep as well.

・ ・ ・ 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐍𝐄𝐗𝐓 𝐌𝐎𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆, you wake up in Mingyu’s arms, laying on top of him and cuddling closer to him. his arm wrapped around your stomach and you snuggle into him, your face nuzzling against his bare chest and you hum softly under your breath. “good morning.” he says in his raspy morning voice before kissing the top of your head causing you to giggle quietly. you lift your head slightly, staring into his dark brown eyes. you watch as they scan over you and your face immediately heats up. “morning.” you say smiling widely at him before giving him a soft kiss.

"Enjoyed last night?" he smirks, caressing your cheek as he gazes into your eyes and you nod "I always enjoy anything with you." you tug down on your bottom lip, pulling him closer. "I'm glad." he hums, climbing on top of you and kissing your lips softly. his lips move down to your neck, leaving soft kisses behind. "Mm, mingyu we can't. I have to help my mom prepare and the kiddos are opening their presents now." you hum, wanting him to continue despite that. “even though we’re missing it.”

"We'll be quick.." He says rubbing his now hard-on against you and you chuckle. "promise?" you open your legs a little wider, letting him between them. he nods before kissing your neck again, running his hand up and down your inner thigh, making you bite your lower lip and arch your back. he pulls away, lifting himself a bit before he slips his cock inside of you and you gasp, wrapping your legs around his waist as your back arches upward.

He moves his hips slowly as he looks into your eyes, watching your facial expressions before burying his head into your neck, nibbling on your earlobe while pumping his hips harder and faster, his teeth scraping lightly. you start moaning softly again which causes him to grow even harder at seeing your reactions. “fuck..” he groaned, grabbing ahold of your hips and slamming himself into you. “yes…” you whisper into his ear, gripping his shoulders tightly. he lets out a guttural growl, his hips pounding against yours with every movement of his body and soon you start feeling waves of pleasure washing over you, your moans getting louder and he quickly kisses your lips to shush you.

He picks up the pace once more and you clutch on his shoulders, your nails digging in, as he comes into you hard. you both collapse back onto his bed, exhausted from the intense sex. Mingyu rolls over on his side, hugging you close to him while you wrap your arm around his waist. "Nothing like morning sex, huh?" I mumble as I snuggle closer. he chuckled and kisses the top of your head before replying "not at all."

Mingyu pecks your lips before removing himself from the bed. he walked into the bedroom and grabbed a clean rag and wets it up. after he squeezed the unneeded water out of it, he walked back into the bedroom and saw that you were trying to sleep and he quickly woke you up. “no no, we have things to do.” he says as he pulls you towards the edge of the bed and cleaned you up.

After you two were all ready and fully showered and cleaned, you walked down the steps and your mom instantly looked at you two. you gave mingyu a kiss on the cheek before walking into the kitchen and you looked up at your mom who was preparing the food alongside my dad. I raise an eyebrow “what is is it, mom?” I ask her with a confusing frown.

she chuckles. “you know, I couldn’t keep my hands off your dad either but… there are children here.” she says quietly and you gulp. “first of all, ew I don’t think I needed to know that and I know, we were just caught in the moment and it’s been days since I’ve seen him since I was here half of week but I do apologize.”

“Thank you, now I need help with this.” Your mom says and you grab the cake and carefully carrys it into the dining room and places it down on the table with everything else.

After everything was prepared and ready, you all began to eat after a prayer. you sat down beside mingyu and instantly smiled at him.

“My mom scolded me as I told you.” he chuckled at your words “I know, she scolded me too, didn’t expect it if I'm being honest.” you giggle at his words before starting to eat your food little by little as your family talked in the background.

I took a deep breath. “this is the best christmas ever, mostly because i have everyone to share it with.” you smile softly at him. “I’m glad, because…this is my favorite christmas ever.” he said looking over at you and you smiled. “I love you.”

“i love you too.”

𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟑 © 𝐚𝐭𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐰𝐡𝐨𝐫𝐞.

#svt #svt smut #svt fanfic #svt fluff #svt x reader #svt mingyu #svt mingyu x reader #svt mingyu smut #svt mingyu x y?n #svt mingyu x y/n #seventeen fanfic #seventeen mingyu #seventeen scenarios #seventeen #seventeen smut #seventeen imagines #seventeen x reader #seventeen fluff #kim mingyu x you #kim mingyu x reader #kim mingyu smut #kim mingyu imagines #kim mingyu fluff

[ryker-writes]

damn that leech sibling post really made me wanna make them sad, so can i request a scenario where reader starts ghosting them? basically just dodging them and their attempts at conversation, and one day the leech twins hear reader trash talking them. perfectly okay if you can’t!

I'm actually glad I get to do another part to the Leech twins one. This branches off from the original post

For those who didn't see the original leech twins sibling angst, you can find it here

Request rules and Masterlists

Leech Twins as siblings (Broken relationship: No forgiveness ending)

the two of them were spending an awful lot of time around you today and insisting on doing whatever you wanted to do

there wasn't any teasing or insults either

it was very...suspicious

you knew of Azul's magic with making contract and how clever they were at luring people in

so you were a little concerned that they wanted you to sign a contract

deciding not to dance around it you asked

"Are you guys trying to get me to sign a contract or something?"

Floyd was very blunt with his response

"Eh? What would we even need from you? You already work for Azul"

Jade was more polite

"We simply wanted to spend some time with you is all."

he smiled, but it wasn't his menacing one

it was a more genuine smile

they genuinely wanted to spend more time with you

but it was far too late for that

after years and years of being cast aside by the entire family and being called the boring little sibling by everyone was already enough

but then they had you working yourself nearly to the point of passing out every other day, all while they continued to make fun of you

and after all of that, they wanted to try and spend time with you now?

you're too tired to deal with this

to deal with them

you just can't anymore

so, without a word, you just turned and walked away from them

from then on, you did everything you could to avoid them

for about a week after that, Jade made consistent efforts to try and talk to you

he would often try to create conversation during your shifts at the lounge

usually it was about orders or certain customers

each time, you never responded or even looked at him, and continued working

but he was persistent and kept trying every chance he got

it's because of his persistence, everything that happened, and their presence at all that you decided to quit your job with the lounge

no longer would you see them on a daily basis

that's what you hoped

not to long after that you noticed Floyd "coincidentally" passing you in the halls or needing something from your classroom

and of course, he had to try and talk to you while you were there

you made a point to leave the room or pass right by him whenever you saw him

as soon as you left you could hear him grumble and sigh behind you

you were beyond exhausted of them at this point

each day they tried to talk to you seemed to chip away at your nerves

it didn't take long for you to finally express how over it you were

they finally gave up after hearing you talk to one of your classmates

the classmate mentioned wanted help with some of the tougher homework from class

they thought you were still associated with the twins and the lounge, so they came to you asking if your brothers or Azul would be able to help since they seemed smart

at that, you laughed

"Smart? I wouldn't call them that. If they've convinced you that they're smart, then they've managed to manipulate you just like they do everyone else. Those two can't even tell when someone doesn't want anything to do with them. They're pests that don't go away."

sure it may have seemed mean from an outsiders perspective

but they heard it, and they got the point

after growing up being the outsider, constantly ignored in the family, and deemed the boring sibling, they got a little taste of what you went through

but of course, they would never be able to feel the full extent of pain you went through because of them

they completely stopped trying to talk to you after that and finally, you could be away from them

there wouldn't be any chance of them hurting you again now

#twst #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #twst jade #jade leech #twst jade x reader #jade leech x reader #twst floyd #twst floyd x reader #floyd leech x reader

[whileyoureinschoolidothisallday]

OKAY it has been a day of being sad and panicky. Time to move.

Yesterday, I made a post detailing the cdc announcement that there will no longer be an isolation requirement for covid. If you are one of the thousands of people rightfully raging in my notes, here's some steps to focus on.

We're not gonna give up. I've seen quite a few comments with things like 'what's the point', 'why should I even try anymore' etc etc and what we're not gonna do is give them what they want! It helps the eugenics cause to be apathetic and listless. We've made it this far, we will continue to make it. I know it's hard, but I am at least right here with you. Give yourself whatever time you need to grieve, and then I need you to get up.

If you have stopped masking for any reason, or you haven't upgraded to a respirator style mask, now is the time to change or start. From now on, we will be living in a country where you could assume there are multiple covid positive people in the room with you at all times. Surgical masks will not handle that load, and cloth masks will be even less effective at that point. Obviously, this is an unprecedented situation we're putting these masks in, and I'm not gonna sit here and pretend to be an expert that can tell you with certainty that even respirators will hold up with this amount of viral load for a long period of time, but it's the best and strongest tool we have. I'm considering using my p100 more, so that's always something to consider as well (and they make you look like a cool raver when you wear them!!!). You can buy all sorts of masks here, there's more links in the comments of my original post, and most states have their own mask blocs. To find them, go to Instagram and type "[your state] mask bloc". Here is a google doc of verified advocacy groups and mask blocs all across the country here is a diy fit test kit you can buy for $30 (unfortunately they are sold out right now. shocker.) PLEASE remember to take a layered response in these times. Masks are not the only tool in our arsenal. PLEASE for the love of God keep up with your vaccinations. Make a corsi-rosenthal box or buy a high quality air purifier if you can afford it--at the very least our homes can be safe havens (you can even put a hepa filter on your furnace!!!! And in your car too!!!!!). Use CPC Mouthwash, nasal irrigation, and nasal sprays like this one. Make it a routine: you come home, you shower, you brush your teeth, you rinse your nose, you change your clothes. And, like I said in another one of my posts, DO NOT TAKE OFF THE MASK.

3. If you would like an outlet for your rage and you're into calling your reps, feel free to calmly but firmly let the cdc have it at these numbers!!!!!

[alt text: a tweet by user silly_paulie that reads:

"Disdain for the CDC unites us all. Call today and demand isolation policies be returned to 10 days, and reducing it further to 1 day would be criminally dangerous. Call both:

404-639-7000 (press 8)

800-232-4636"

end text.]

4. If you need more outlets for your rage, I STRONGLY encourage you to get involved with your local union. Moreso than calling the CDC, tbh. I've seen multiple comments telling people just to lie about your symptoms to get more sick time off, but since there's no legal precedent to allow employees sick time for covid, all that's gonna do is get people fired. I truly believe in my lefty heart that the ONLY way we're getting anything close to mitigation is through labor rights. Even the standard for the fucking flu is 3 days, and that's nowhere near as contagious or disabling as covid. I say this as a high risk person with a neuromuscular disability: covid is an intersectional issue, but where we have the most leverage to get what we need is through labor rights.

It is NOT safe for workers to be working while ill with a Level 3 Biohazard (same as TB and the FUCKING PLAGUE. Seriously we have more regulations around fucking lice)

It is NOT safe to willfully EXPOSE your employees to a Level 3 Biohazard

It is NECESSARY for all employees to be allowed up to 10 days to recover fully from Covid-19, in order to avoid possible further injury from or hospitalization

You will NOT die or be disabled for the sake of the wealthy!!!!!

(and while you're at it, ask for better air filtration too!!!! At least 5 air changes an hour, MERV-13 air filters!! Then we won't have to constantly worry about virus bs and policy changes in the first place!!!!)

5. Closing statements. Nothing has changed with covid, this is just policy. Covid still isn't magic, she still has to get in you before she can do damage--mask up, arm your home with clean air, and don't let her. It's always worse toward the end. This is not the time to give up, it's time to dig in your heels and get to work. There are so many good things happening with covid. They are finding encouraging treatments for long covid. Finally, after years of nothing, a new prophylactic for the high risk was submitted for emergency use to the FDA, and it looks like this time it's built to last against new mutations. Covid is here to stay for the rest of our lives, but the real science hasn't given up on taking the worst of its teeth out. We WILL get to the point where the extreme fear of catching covid is nothing but a bad memory for EVERYONE. All I need you to do is commit to the belief that you're gonna survive long enough to be in that moment with the rest of us.

Now stay safe, and give em hell!!!!!

#covid 19 #covid safe #covid advocacy #covid is not over #mask up #danger days: truffula flu simulator #truffula flu survival guide

[ddejavvu]

Okok. A little Dbf hotch scenario I thought of🤭

Imagine the reader occasionally smokes weed with friends and she can always get past her dad high without him noticing. But when she gets dropped off this time she comes home to Aaron and her dad having a drink… and he immediately knows she’s high.

Do with that what you will!

- eloise!!💌

today is multiverse monday, send me any au you can think of! :)

this post is 18+ (because of an age gap and drug use), minors dni.

You don't think anything will be different about tonight than any of the other nights you've come home high. Because your dad never notices, and you don't linger in his study when you announce your return home. You're not quite perceptive enough to pick up on Aaron's prolonged stare on you as you greet your father and his guest, but you do happen to notice when Aaron steps into the kitchen behind you not a minute later.

"Y/N," He announces his presence, and you turn, trying to keep your mind solely focused on him. It's hard, it wants to wander into a foggy haze, but Aaron's a treat to look at, so you start there.

"Hi, Aaron," You hum, a glass of water in hand to take back to your room, "Did you want water too?"

"No," He doesn't stop in the doorway, instead he makes his way over to you, stopping slightly too close for normal conversation. You lean back slightly out of instinct, though if you had your way you'd lean closer, and he studies your face.

"How much weed have you smoked?" He asks a moment later, interrupting the thick beat of silence that had befallen the cramped kitchen.

"What?"

"You're high," He raises a hand to your cheek, tilting your head down so that he can get a better look at you, "Your eyes are red. And you're spacey; you're high."

"I am not!" You feel petulant, like a toddler caught with their hand in the cookie jar, "I'm not high, I just- I've been crying."

"Really? About what?" He hums, eyes narrowing ever-so-slightly as he stares down at you, your chin still held in his large hand.

"Um- I broke up with my boyfriend," You fib, because you didn't have one in the first place, "And I'm just sad. That's all."

"I'm sorry to hear that." Aaron croons sympathetically, then drops his hand from your face so that his wrist hovers in front of your nose.

"What time is it?"

You squint at his watch, confused, "What?"

"Tell me the time," He urges, angling the face of his watch towards your own, "If you're not high, you'll be able to read my watch."

"But-"

"Come on," He murmurs, and the smooth tone of his voice sends your insides whirling, "What time is it, sweetheart?"

You don't know. The numbers just aren't making sense, and you're more focused on the dark hair lining his thick wrist than you are on the hands of a clock.

He gives you ten seconds, longer than he needs to know, really, then sighs.

"That's what I thought. Drink this, all of it, and go sleep it off." He gives you an unamused glance, lips turned down as he taps at the rim of your glass, "And don't ever let me catch you coming home high again, do you hear me?"

He seems to take your stunned silence for an answer, and relaxes slightly, backing away. But you find your voice before he's gone, "You're not my dad. You don't live here," And he's stiffening again, turning back to face you.

"I'm not your dad," He repeats, eyes a shade darker than they normally seem. "Your dad's so unobservant he wouldn't notice if you got a face tattoo. But I would. I know you, I notice you. And if it takes me moving in to stop you from smoking, I'll be here every night, sweetheart."

He lets his words hang in the air, exhilaratingly firm. It's a thrill to be noticed by him, even if it means he wants you to stop smoking weed. You watch him with parted lips, not a gawky gape to your mouth, but just enough for a soft intake of air to hit your lungs. You're speechless, and this time silence is your answer.

"Drink your water, and go to sleep," He instructs you, nodding towards the glass as he makes his way back to your dad's study, "Don't let me catch you again."

#aaron hotchner #aaron hotchner x reader #aaron hotchner imagine #aaron hotchner scenario #aaron hotchner oneshot #aaron hotchner one-shot #aaron hotchner one shot #aaron hotchner headcanon #aaron hotchner headcanons #aaron hotchner hc #aaron hotchner hcs #aaron hotchner fanfiction #aaron hotchner fanfic #aaron hotchner fic #aaron hotchner blurb #aaron hotchner drabble #aaron hotchner dialogue #aaron hotchner fluff #aaron hotchner x reader fanfiction #aaron hotchner au #dbf!hotch #multiverse mondays #ddejavvu’s multiverse mondays

[thewxtchwhowrites]

Hola, oke no sorry haha. I can’t speak Spanish, just a bit hehe.

I don’t know if you write for request but because I wanted to say Hola I think about an idea now. What about Bucky taking you out for Dinner and your ex is there as well and tries to convince you he is the right one but Bucky is such a sweet gentle man and super protective?

Thank you in advance, even when you don’t write it hehe.💕

Ha. Did you think I forgot about you? Well no darling, it wasn't like that.

Here you have (late, but sure) and at once I took the opportunity to do therapy writing this. I was dumped about seven months ago by my partner, when I received your request, so I thank you very much for the idea, although it took me a while to prepare it.

I really hope you like it and it's what you expect, I interpreted it this way.

summary: you finally come out of an emotional sadness and decide to go out with Bucky to dinner, without thinking about who you would end up running into.

words: 3219

Beautiful dividers by @cafekitsune

You were carefully walking down the stairs and your heels started making noise as they hit the steps, causing Bucky and Steve who were talking near the door to turn to look at you.

Bucky looked nervous, and it was no wonder, the truth is that he had not been on a date in more than 70 or 80 years, with everything that had happened in his life these last few years since the 40s.

Steve seemed to calm him down, when the blond turned to look at you he had a smile on his lips, he looked like a proud older brother.

As you walked down the stairs you wondered how you had really gotten to this day, and the truth is that the whole series of events had been very convoluted and fun...

Or at least now that you were feeling better.

You had been depressed for a couple of months and it was because your boyfriend with whom you had been in a relationship for five years had broken up with you overnight with a simple message:

"I can't keep doing this, forgive me."

Your eyes began to fill with tears as you continued reading as best you could:

"I owe you what I am today. And it hurts me to tell you this, I don't know, I feel like I'm really screwing up by leaving all these years behind." Your tears no longer let you see, your vision was blurred. "But I want to make that decision and continue alone from now on. Maybe we can be friends in the future."

Bastard. You thought to yourself, it was obvious that there was something strange about his behavior after you both had your last movie date, but you decided not to listen to your intuition even though Natasha had warned you.

"I don't know, honey, I think you should be prepared…" Natasha sat on your bed and sighed, taking one of your pillows in her hands, and noticing one of the photographs you had on your wall where you and your now ex boyfriend ex-boyfriend, were at a Coney Island fair with ice cream on your faces.

"But Nat…" You said while shaking your head. You were delusional, without a doubt. "We've been together for five years, I don't think we'll break up. He's just a little stressed because his business isn't going well."

There were times where your ex-boyfriend would disappear for weeks, claiming that he was busy working or trying to run his business (a music store that his grandfather had owned for many years) and sometimes when you logged on to social media after work, you would notice that he was still online sharing posts or tweeting, although he didn't respond to your chat.

Sometimes he'd leave you on 'read' or sometimes he just wouldn't seem to open the chat, which was… strange.

Until it happened.

Even the final message of that long paragraph of excuses had a rather late apology that said:

"I'm very sorry, not only for the moment in which I'm telling you all this. But also for what I've put you through and how I treated you, not speaking to you for weeks and then coming to you to write all this shit."

That last message definitely led to long hours of crying, especially at night in your room at the Avenger Compound, not wanting to leave your room, maybe just to eat with everyone or for missions, and then return to your room.

You were even more temperamental during missions, you hit harder and you were even more reckless, which Bucky noticed immediately, he knew that attitude and hatred.

The first thing Nat, Wanda, and Maria Hill did when they found out was bring you ice cream and have a girls' night out, which ended relatively well, at least until Wanda put on a movie and the guy's name was your ex's.

A couple of nights later you heard a soft knock on your door, you were crying as quietly as you could and you thought that maybe you had woken up Steve or Nat who were sleeping in the adjoining rooms, when you got up and opened the door, it was Bucky.

"Bucky?" You asked with some confusion.

"I… I brought you this." Bucky took a cookie out of his pants pocket, when you took it you could feel that it was broken. "I accidentally sat on the cookie while I was on my way here on the motorcycle, sorry."

That, even if it was something simple, made you laugh and maybe it was the first time in five fucking months that you laughed sincerely and not in a forced way.

Bucky after you thanked him, he nodded softly with a shy smile on his lips and left saying goodnight.

You look at Bucky's face as a smile began to form on his lips as you walked down the stairs, it seemed like he saw the most beautiful thing on the planet and he even had a small bouquet of flowers for you in his hands.

As soon as you finished walking down the stairs, Bucky approached you at the bottom of them.

"You look…" Bucky started to say, but stayed silent.

"Do I look too dressed up? Is too much?" You said nervously, touching your hair and ironing your dress with your hands at the level of your stomach, it had been Nat and Wanda's idea to groom you as if you were a little doll even though you weren't totally used to it.

“No, you look like an angel…” Bucky interrupted you. He continued to look at you with those blue eyes, it was a kind, sweet look. You felt your cheeks redden and you let out a nervous laugh.

Steve raised his eyebrows at such a compliment, and since you had your back to Steve, he took the opportunity to give Bucky a thumbs up.

"Oh, this is for you." Bucky gave you the small bouquet of flowers that you took carefully, they smelled delicious.

“James, you didn't have to do it." you said in a whisper, looking between the flowers and Bucky.

You didn't remember that a man had ever given you flowers before, your ex in itself was not a person to give you that type of details and you, sometimes, didn't allow yourself to receive them either.

But for some reason with Bucky, the fact that he gave you those details, it felt different.

“It's true.” He put his hands in the pocket of his black pants, nodding at your comment. "I didn't have to, but I wanted to do it."

That comment caught your attention.

Steve patted both of you gently like a father and opened the door to the compound, smiling.

"Have fun…" Steve looked at you and nodded his approval as if you were his little sister. "But not too much."

Steve looked at Bucky when he said that last sentence, that was definitely a warning to him, Bucky just shrugged and let you take his arm as they walked to the motorcycle to Izzy's.

Honestly, you don't know how it happened, but it happened.

You began to spend more time with Bucky as the days and even weeks went by, first he asked you for help to play a prank on Sam by painting Nightwing as if it were a stingray and recording it to show in the group chat that you all shared.

Then you would help him with technological issues or you would end up sitting in the compound's cinema watching old movies while you listened to him tell you things about how things were in those times.

And maybe some embarrassing stories about Steve.

You discovered that he was chivalrous, opening the door for you and even letting you in first by placing either of his two hands just under your back in a protective manner. Even when you had to take something somewhere he offered himself, not allowing you to do it.

Including the bowl of popcorn, because he didn't want you to get burned.

You thought that sometimes Bucky was an exaggerator, but you began to notice that he did things that even your ex-boyfriend had stopped doing after being together for a while.

When you and Bucky went out on the street, he always offered you his right arm, since he felt a little insecure offering you his left arm, the mechanical one. However, that insecurity started to disappear and then he didn't care which arm you grabbed as long as you held his arm when you walked.

The times when neither of you could sleep and you stayed talking, whether in your bed or his, he didn't fall asleep while you were talking about those topics that you were both passionate about, nor did he change the subject, he just watched you with attention.

Bucky even remembered the things you had said to him a couple of months or weeks ago and that you didn't even remember what you had said to him.

You were healing little by little, starting to be you again.

And somehow he was healing too.

If you were at one of Tony's parties or maybe at a mission meeting, sometimes you would look at Bucky when he wasn't looking at you, and the other way around would also happen, and if you caught each other looking, both would just smile like a couple of fools and look away.

One night you heard a soft knock on your door, you recognized that soft knock, when you opened your door it was Bucky again, but he looked different tonight.

"Hi..." Bucky said slowly, seeming a little nervous, his right hand resting on the frame of your door, trying to look casual. "I wanted to invite you to dinner, well, it's not really a dinner."

You could notice and see Bucky's nervousness when trying to say things as he had (probably) rehearsed them in front of the bathroom mirror and he added:

"Or yes, maybe it is, I don't know."

You interrupted his rambling with a smile on your lips, gently raising a hand to the level of your chest.

"Yes..." That's what you said, you noticed how his eyes softened at the fact that you had agreed. "Yes, I'd like to go."

He nodded repeatedly and sighed in relief, letting out a soft chuckle.

"So Friday at eight sounds good to you?" Bucky was clearing his throat, trying to hide his excitement that you had accepted dinner, you nodded. "Okay, I'll see you on Friday."

Bucky quickly kissed your cheek, wished you goodnight, and left without stopping smiling like a fool.

When you two arrived at Izzy's, Bucky greeted Leah with a smile, she seemed surprised but happy that she now finally saw him with someone other than Mr. Nakajima, especially seeing you walk in with him.

You and Bucky sat at one of the tables and you had a sneaking suspicion that someone was watching you, but you weren't sure after all there were more people than usual today, it was Friday.

After a couple of laughs, drinks, Asian food and bad jokes, a few caresses on your hand from his you noticed out of the corner of your eye that someone was approaching the table and you swore it was a waiter.

But it was your ex.

“Y/N…” Your ex said in a firm voice, looking from Bucky reluctantly and then back to you. "What are you doing here with him?"

The audacity of this idiot. You thought as you heard those words come out of your ex's mouth.

"The real question is, what are YOU doing here?" You responded rudely as a frown began to form on your forehead.

"So you're the… man who broke her heart." Bucky told him in a calm voice, but he was really trying to stop himself from smashing your ex-boyfriend's face into the pretty little sushi boat that was on the table, because he didn't want to ruin your night.

Bucky slowly stood up from the chair, making your ex jump a little, maybe he was nervous with Bucky's presence.

And the truth is he should be nervous.

Bucky was quite tall, strong and even if he didn't have a vibranium left arm, he would have enough strength to change your ex-boyfriend's health status to deceased if he tried to go far with you.

And on top of that he had to avoid at all costs breaking the second rule that he had agreed upon with Dr. Raynor in therapy: No one gets hurt.

Your ex scrunched his face in disapproval at Bucky's words, not believing what he was hearing, but now you understood many things, you had been receiving notifications on social networks, especially from Instagram indicating that your ex occasionally looked at the stories you published.

Part of you didn't understand why you continued to have him on Instagram, perhaps because you used that social network very little, but whatever, now you understood what your ex was doing there.

"What? N-No, I was confused…" Your ex started to speak, he even tried to get a little closer to you, but he couldn't since Bucky gently moved his left arm that was covered by a glove. "Now my mind is more than clear and I want us to go back Y/N."

Bucky tried to talk to him by placing his right hand on his shoulder.

"Look, son…" But your ex just moved, removing Bucky's hand from his shoulder.

"Don't call me son, we are the same age, pal." Your ex responded aggressively, while rolling his eyes, looking back at you.

Very few knew that Bucky was actually 106 years old, which if you had been in another situation you would have found it funny.

"Look, I don't know what you've been through in these eight or nine months, but she and I are together, and she's not interested in getting back with you or anyone else." Bucky spoke in a fairly firm tone of voice, being respectful.

You began to feel anxious, you felt your stomach turn not only from nervousness, but from the embarrassment you were experiencing in the establishment, many of the people at the adjacent tables were looking towards you.

"Are you really going to throw away all these years together with me, by being with him?" Your ex-boyfriend spoke softly, as if he was trying to manipulate you. "Y/N? I know you haven't forgotten me, you still love me, I know that."

You looked between both men, there was some doubt in your eyes or that's what Bucky thought he saw in you, maybe it was embarrassment.

You got up from your seat and enter the bathroom of the place with tears in your eyes, on many occasions you had dreamed of something similar, dreams that ended in nightmares that you tried to ignore some nights, many ended with your ex calling you different things like 'bitch', 'whore' or 'ungrateful witch' while throwing things at you or shaking you.

You ended up waking up drenched in sweat many nights, breathing heavily and then crying silently until sleep overcame you, although those tears and nightmares ended up being silenced by Bucky on more than one occasion while he slept next to you, stroking your hair or hugging you in his arms.

You had entered the bathroom and locked yourself inside one of the stalls, you were hyperventilating, you didn't think the wound would reopen again, you really thought you were over that, you didn't know how much time had passed, you were just sitting on the toilet seat with tears in your eyes.

Until your train of thought stopped when you heard the door to the women's bathroom open wide, hearing soft footsteps coming in and seeming to have stopped near the mirror.

"Y/N?" It was Leah's voice, it sounded soft because the bathroom had quite an echo. "Are you okay, do you need anything?"

"He's gone?" You asked shakily, leaving the bathroom stall, as soon as Leah saw you with your makeup smeared with tears, she gently tilted her head, giving you an empathetic look and approached you.

Leah nodded at your question.

"Yes, between Mr. Nakajima, Bucky and I, we took that being out of the restaurant." Leah rolled her eyes, she reached into the pockets of her apron for a handkerchief with a couple of flowers embroidered on it and wiped your face. "I really thought James was going to break his face, I was already thinking about what to replace the restaurant furniture with… they are made of old wood."

Both laughed at the comment, although you also imagined Mr. Nakajima, who had a bad temper, pushing your ex out of the restaurant door.

He was a man with a quite volatile temperament, like Bucky's.

When you returned to the restaurant you didn't see Bucky, he was outside leaning on his motorcycle, you said goodbye to Mr. Nakajima who was also leaving the restaurant with you and of course to Leah, thanking both.

Mr. Nakajima opened the door for you and let you out first.

"Pretty ladies first" Mr. Nakajima said with a kind smile, which made you laugh, and that made Bucky turn his head to the door of the establishment and approach you.

"Are you ok?" Bucky gently took your face in his hands, caressing your cheeks with his thumbs.

You looked into his eyes and you could feel that he was still upset by your ex's attitude, in fact, he seemed a little uncomfortable, perhaps remembering your look of doubt.

You nodded silently. You had a thoughtful look again.

"Honey…" Bucky began to speak softly, lowering his hands to his sides. It was the first time he had called you that pet name since you had started talking and going out. "I know I'm not the easiest person to deal with."

You remained silent, listening to what he had to say.

"I have nightmares at night, I have anger issues, I'm 106 years old…" Bucky chuckled, looking away from your eyes for a moment to see a couple of people crossing the street during the lonely night. "Even other problems, especially because of my past, so I will totally understand if you want to get back with him."

You didn't know what your expression really was, but Bucky seemed surprised as he looked back at you.

"What? I said something wrong?" Bucky asked, maybe you looked at him like he was crazy.

"I'm really going to have to talk to Dr. Raynor." You said nodding with a smile on your lips.

Bucky looked at you confused, he didn't understand what the mention from his psychologist that he was seeing it had to do with this conversation.

“Oh please…” You rolled your eyes, sometimes you forgot that Bucky was born before penicillin. "It means that I'd be crazy if you think I'm going to choose my ex. I like you, James B-"

Bucky leaned forward, crashing his lips against yours and bringing his hands back to your face, your eyes instinctively closed, enjoying the kiss which became more intense and then you both separated, gasping for air, without saying a word...

You two now knew how the other felt.

#bucky barnes #james bucky barnes #bucky barnes mcu #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x female reader #bucky fanfic #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes fanfic #request one-shot #request #one shot #thewxtchwhowrites

[bedoballoons]

─⊰⁠⊹ฺ❄️𝔾𝕖𝕟𝕤𝕙𝕚𝕟 ℍ𝕖𝕒𝕕𝕔𝕒𝕟𝕠𝕟𝕤⊰⁠⊹ฺ❄️

{༻~How do I escape this now~༺}

CW: Angst to fluff, Gn! Reader whos comfort language is physical, reader is mentioned to have anxiety and depression! Very slight mention of a panick attack in Tighnaris.

A/n: This is completely self indulgent, it's been so long since I've written anything and posted it so this is a little short. Just a little comfort for a mentally struggling reader, in case anyone else has been feeling this way too. You're not alone okay and I hope you feel better soon, you're amazing and no one should say otherwise. If you ever need someone to listen, I'm here. <3

(Includes: Lyney, and Tighnari)

𑁍༄Lyney:

You pulled yourself into a tighter ball, making it harder to breath even though it was already a struggle...you could feel the area under you head, wet with tears that clung to your face...what was happening. When had things started to hurt so bad...when had your mind started to think the way it did now, you shut your eyes tighter, wishing you just didn't exist...that everything you'd ever said could just be forgotten, there would be no stress anymore and no more hiding under the blankets so no one would see you upset.

"My love..."

You audibly sucked in a breath, like being silent would make him think you weren't there...you didnt want him to see you like this...you didnt want him to worry...to feel like he had to help you even though he had other things to do. "I'm okay, just taking a nap Lyney. Super tired..." You tried, but the rasp in your voice and the sad tone in your words instantly gave you away.

You heard him sigh and listened as his footsteps grew closer...until suddenly you felt his weight all around you. He'd hugged you along with the blanket and just, held you like that. Never forcing you to talk or show your puffy eyes and sniffly nose. Never forcing you out of the room or to try harder to be happier, just held you comfortingly until you moved. It helped...infact it didn't take long for you to calm down after that, tell him how you were feeling and let him help you...let him tell you you're beautiful and that he loves you. Let him listen to everything because he simply wanted to...let him in and never have to face everything alone again.

𑁍༄Tighnari:

How long had you been in his arms...minutes? Hours? Days? You had no idea...you'd lost track in seconds, but honestly...it didn't matter anyway. You just needed a little more, just needed to hear the soft hum in his voice a little longer...just needed to feel the gentle circles he rubbed into your back a little longer...was that selfish...were you annoying him...should you put on that tough face you always wore and say you felt better...even when you didn't?

"I...I'm feeling better Tighnari, I'll-"

"Mhmm, you know I can hear your heart rate speed up when you're lying right? You don't have to lie lovely...I'm not going anywhere...and there's no where I'd rather be then with you, helping you feel better...calm down after the hundreds of near panick attacks you almost had today. The only thing I want is to see you happy and I mean really happy, not pretend happy..." He pulled away from you slightly so he could place a light kiss on your puffy cheek...

It was hard, to accept his words...to think he truly wanted to be there with you even when you were at your worst, but even as you once again rested your head on him and let your emotions all out...he didn't dare move. He wouldn't, not until you truly felt like you could face the world again...and it only reinstilled that faith that he'd never leave you to handle everything all alone. You'd always have him. No matter what.

ଘ(੭*ˊᵕˋ)੭* ੈ♡‧₊˚~Love you all~*⁠.⁠✧

#genshin impact #genshin headcanons #genshin #genshin fanfic #genshin x reader #genshin x you #lyney x you #lyney x reader #lyney headcanons #lyney fluff #lyney angst #tighnari x you #tighnari x reader #tighnari headcanons #tighnari fluff #tighnari angst

[mothdruid]

Within the past 72 hours the TGM fandom got a fire put under it's ass, for lack of a better term/phrase. Even though I'm not as active in the fandom anymore, it did make me want to talk about a few things. This isn't the first time that I've had to make a post similar to this, usually speaking about reblogs and keeping your fanfic writers feeling wanted within the fandom spaces, but today I'm going to talk more about fandom etiquette and my experiences in fandom spaces. So, if you want to hear my opinion on fandom etiquette, how I learned fandom etiquette, and my thoughts about the doxing situation that has happened, keep on reading.

My Fandom Experience.

The first fandom that I was ever a part of was The Hunger Games fandom in the 8th grade (if you don't include my anime fandoms). I was 12-13 at the time. This was when I was first introduced to Tumblr and being involved within a fandom online. At the time I was super young, barely even knew who I was as a person, let alone in a fandom space. All I did was reblog little gifsets and fawn over Josh Hutcherson. I remember getting my first hate anon, even though I didn't do anything that would generate that to even happen. Even when I was 12-13, I couldn't understand why anyone would send a hate anon. That was when I found out a friend of mine found my Tumblr and actually secretly hated me, so she sent me hate anons. Still, before I knew it was her I didn't understand.

Fandoms were a formative part of my childhood. I think that main one that helped form me though was the Supernatural (yeah, I know, eye roll), Naruto, and The Hobbit fandoms. I had made friends on Tumblr and Instagram through these fandoms. During these times was when I had first started consuming fanfiction. Specifically, destiel and thilbo fanfiction. This is how I started to find the things in fanfiction that I loved, and the things that I hated. Instead of sending hate to the writers for their thoughts and stories that I didn't agree with, I would back out of the story or just scroll past. Not only that, I also started to use the filters on AO3 constantly, ensuring that I was only reading the fics that I knew I'd enjoy. Also, I was careful to read warnings and tags prior to reading the fic. Never once did I blame the writer for something that I knew I didn't like and accidentally read or read for see what it was about.

After high school was when I started getting into fanfiction writing. I've written for a lot of fandoms during this time. The IT movies, Total Drama, Haikyuu, Attack on Titan, Marvel, Bridgerton, Top Gun: Maverick, and currently ASOIAF. As a writer I've never gotten hate, thankfully, but I have had a lot of friends that have. It's sad to see so many people who take the time to write, whether it's enjoyable or not, receive hate. As writers we are simply expressing our creativity for the things that we love. Since posting fanfiction on tumblr, I have experienced a lot of people pestering for new updates and when the next fic is, and so have a lot of other writers on here. Even though people only know us as a little icon and username, fanfiction writers are people. We have lives outside of writing fanfiction. Everyone also isn't the same type writer. One person may easily write multiple fics every week, some of us take longer, and some of us are even just passion writers (me lol).

The TGM fandom has been one of the most negative fandom experiences I've ever seen/had. It is full of some of the meanest people/anons I've ever seen. From writers being attacked for fic ideas, people being sent hate for something that the anon has full control over, and people constantly expecting new stories to read on the daily. Yes, I do know that other fandoms have these issues, but it seems to be almost a weekly, hell, even daily thing within this fandom. A lot of the issues that I see happen in this fandom are from people who don't understand fandom etiquette.

Fandom Etiquette.

If you had noticed there was a few things I put in bold above. These are key things that I learned during my time that attribute to fandom etiquette. So without further a do, I'll list out some fandom etiquette rules that I follow all the time.

Don't send hate anons to people

Block/unfollow people you don't like

If you don't like an idea or fic, don't read it

Read through all warnings and tags that the writer provided

Use AO3 filters

Don't blame the writer/creator for reading things they created that you actively know you don't like

Writers/Creators aren't "content farms"

There are people behind these blogs/usernames, treat them like someone you'd see on the street

Writers/Creators are expressing love/passion for something, don't hate them for doing that

If you see something fandom related that you don't like, scroll past it or ignore it

YOU CURATE YOUR OWN EXPERIENCE (ESPECIALLY ON TUMBLR)

The Doxing Situation.

For those who are unaware but decided to read this anyways, recently there was a writer (Mama Mayhem) on here who got doxed from another writer in the fandom. Mayhem has since lost her job due to the doxing. This was apparently from her breaking HIPAA by posting a picture into a private groupchat/discord. This picture was posted almost a half year ago. Meaning that the person who reported/doxed Mayhem had known about this picture for months and only recently decided to do something about it.

I'll start by saying that I also work in healthcare, and know many other people here who do. I understand that a HIPAA violation is 100% an offense that gets you fired. I'm not excusing the HIPAA violation if one did occur.

Some people have brought up the idea that maybe the person that reported the picture, and doxed Mayhem, was doing it out of the goodness of their heart. Due to the timeline of it all, that doesn't seem likely. I had a previous coworker get fired for HIPAA violations and it took a total of a week from the initial report for her to be gone.

The biggest thing I want to convey is that TWO WRONGS CAN HAPPEN AT THE SAME TIME. Yes, if Mayhem violated HIPAA, it is wrong. But at the same time, the person held onto this information for months only to use it out of spite, pettiness, and cruelty, is wrong.

My Thoughts.

Due to Mayhem being doxed, a lot of people have decided to leave this platform, take indefinite hiatuses, stop writing, or move to AO3 exclusively., and I don't blame them. I'll be honest, I'm thinking about moving to AO3 exclusively now. AO3 feels a lot more rewarding in my experience. I already only post my fics for ships to AO3, so why not just post everything on AO3 (which I usually do).

I think a lot of people have forgot what it feels like to feel shame in something they say or do. When I say this, it's directed towards people who send hate or do other malicious things in fandom spaces. Fandoms were never this clique-ish and mean. I think it has to do with the pandemic, meaning that a lot of people who would have never joined a fandom did because they weren't allowed to do anything outside of their house. So, those mean girls that made fun of fandom girlies (g/n) previously, joined the fandoms and decided started bullying the people within them.

This situation is super shitty and people are now scared. It makes complete sense, especially after seeing someone, that many of you were close to, be doxed. A lot of people are scared of it happening to them now. I don't think this fandom will be the same after this situation, but who knows, maybe everyone will just forget and move on. Either way, I think I'll be taking a step back from the TGM fandom. I'll still be here, but until further notice, I won't be posting any TGM fanfiction. Maybe a gifset/picture here and there, but I don't think this is a fandom I feel comfortable writing for anymore.

If you've read all of this, thank you.

#moth talks #here it is #sorry it's so long but i couldn't convey my thoughts any other way

[scoonsalicious]

Unwanted: Chapter 8, Unexpected - Pt. 2

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Fem!Reader

Summary: When your FWB relationship with your best friend Bucky Barnes turns into something more, you couldn’t be happier. That is, however, until a new Avenger sets her sights on your super soldier and he inadvertently breaks your heart. You take on a mission you might not be prepared for to put some distance between the two of you and open yourself up to past traumas. Too bad the only one who can help you heal is the one person you can no longer trust.

Warnings: (For this part only; see Story Masterlist for general Warnings) Language, poorly translated Russian, bad jokes all around, Jade Carthage (she's a warning at this point), mentions of Bucky's sad past.

Word Count: 851

Previously On...: You and Bucky were enjoying some Thai makeout takeout in the common room, but you were rudely interrupted. Now you have to deliver Jade to her new room. And why is Steve acting like such a dick?

A/N: A short Part 2 for your 2sday! Feeling generous; might post Part 3 later today; idk. Just kidding; I'm going to do it, either on one of my breaks or when I get home from work, lol.

Thank you to all those who have been reading; if you like what you've read, likes, comments, and reblogs give me life, and I truly appreciate them, and you!

Banner By: The absolutely amazing @mrsbuckybarnes1917

Taglist: (Please let me know if you’d like to be added!) @jmeelee @cazellen @blackhawkfanatic @les-sel @marcswife21 @buckybarnessimpp @mrsbuckybarnes1917 @erelierraceala @hayjat @capswife @itsteambarnes @jupiter-107 @marygoddessofmischief @sebastians-love @learisa @lethallyprotected @rabbitrabbit12321 @buckybarnesandmarvel @fanfictiongirl77 @calwitch @fantasyfootballchampion @selella @jackiehollanderr @wintercrows

You were leaning against a couch and mindlessly scrolling through your social media feed when Jade walked back into the common room about twenty minutes later.

"Where's Sergeant Barnes?" she asked by way of greeting.

"Bathroom," you said, slipping your phone into your pocket. "Should be back in a minute."

Jade sighed and walked closer to you, her stiletto heels sending her towering above your head. "You know, you really don't have to come with us," she drawled, as if offering you a way out was doing you some kind of favor. "I'm sure Bucky can show me to my room all by himself. There's no need for you to inconvenience yourself to babysit him. Unless, of course, you don't trust him around me." She smirked at you, emerald eyes hard and cutting.

You chuckled, moving away from the couch and standing up straight, though you couldn't hope to match her height. "It's no trouble at all," you replied, your tone sickeningly saccharine. "I'd hardly call it an inconvenience to take a nanosecond to point to your door while my boyfriend and I are already on our way back to my room to fuck."

"You're a real bitch, you know that?" Jade seethed at you. Well. That took you aback.

"Excuse me?" you countered. "I'm a bitch?"

"It wasn't enough for you to humiliate me in front of Stark and Rogers during my interview, but you had to go and make a play for Bucky once you knew I was interested in him," Jade scoffed. "That was a real mature stunt you pulled at dinner, by the way, storming off like a baby, hoping he'd follow you."

You stared at her, at a loss for words. She couldn't be serious; no one suffered this heavily from Main Character Syndrome. "Look," you said after staring at her for a moment, "you're free to think whatever you want, but Bucky and I--"

"You and I what, Sweets?" Bucky returned from the bathroom, wrapping his arms around your waist and pressing his lips to your temple. "Hey, Vixen; ready to see your new home away from home?"

Jade battered her lashes up at him. "I can't wait, Sergeant," she purred at him.

"Uh, Bucky's just fine," he said, a slight blush creeping up the side of his neck. You couldn't help but wonder what that was all about. No, you reminded yourself. You two were in a good place. It wouldn't do you any good working yourself up over something that was most likely nothing. Instead, you took Bucky's hand.

"Ready to go, then?" you asked him. "The sooner we show Jade here her room, the sooner you and I can take advantage of my impromptu half day."

It was a tense trip from the common room down to your floor, though Bucky was doing his best to keep up a casual and friendly conversation.

Exiting the elevator onto your floor, Jade said: "Sorry if this is overstepping but, they kept you at the facility in Siberia, didn't they?" You froze in your steps, immediately squeezing Bucky's hand as you felt his entire body go rigid alongside you.

"Jade," you said, your voice almost pleading, "he doesn't really like to talk--"

"Yes," said Bucky, stiffly, as though his voice was coming on autopilot. "Yes, they did."

"They kept me there for a little while in the early 2000s," she said. "I wonder if our time there ever overlapped."

Bucky coughed into his hand. "I, uh... I wouldn't really be able to tell you. I was on cryo most of the time."

Jade gave a soft laugh. "Nu, dazhe ne nakhodyas' na l'du, etogo mesta bylo dostatochno, chtoby zastavit' menya nenavidet' kholod do kontsa moyey grebanoy zhizni." Well, even without being on ice, that place was enough to make me hate the cold for the rest of my fucking life.

Bucky's barked a short but genuine laugh, startling you. "Kholodneye, chem ved'minskaya sis'ka, ya prav?" Colder than a witch's tit, am I right?

"Vo vsyakom sluchaye, kholodneye, chem moi sis'ki." She said to him with a wink. Colder than my tits, anyway.

Bucky threw his head back and laughed aloud at that, and Jade shot you a side smirk. You rolled your eyes.

"If you want to stand here all day and make jokes about tits, Bucky, I may as well go back to work." Your voice was annoyed as you made to extract your hand from his and move away, but Bucky's grip on you tightened.

"What? No! You are not going back to work, Doll," he said as he pulled you into him, letting his arms envelop you. "Vix, your door's right over there," he pointed down the hall, "and please feel free to let us know if you need anything. But for now, if you'll excuse us," without warning, he picked you up and threw you over his shoulder like a goddamn caveman, "I have to fix it so work's the last thing on this one's mind." With a grin, he carried your shrieking self down the hall and into your room.

<- Previous Part / Next Part ->

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky x you #bucky x reader #bucky fanfic #bucky barnes #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky x female reader #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes fanfiction #james bucky buchanan barnes #james buchanan barnes #mcu bucky barnes #james barnes

[strniohoeee]

Dolor

Pairing: Chris Sturniolo X Female Reader💌

Synopsis: Y/N can sense that Chris and hers relationship might not last. When they talk will they work it out, or call it quits?🫂

Warnings⚠️: None, I was just feeling a sad Chris imagine today 🥹 shit lowkey made me tear up….it do be hitting home

Song for the imagine: Changes- XXXTENTACION

You’re changing, I can’t stand it

My heart can’t take this damage

And the way I feel, can’t stand it

Everyone knew….everyone saw it, but I chose to ignore it. Not wanting to come to terms with how Chris and I’s relationship was truly going. We were dating for two years at this point, and it just wasn’t the same. Chris was no longer mine….we just weren’t meant for each other.

This started within the last 2 months, Chris just started being different, and I feel like we almost grew apart? I was always with him and his brothers, but it just wasn’t right I wanted us to go back to normal? I’m not sure what I wanted honestly

It really started to make me question what was going on between us when their fans started commenting on their videos, their posts, my posts….making edits, and assuming things about our relationship. It made me physically sick….if it was clear as day to their fans why couldn’t I just come to terms with it?

There wasn’t any anger towards one another, but there just wasn’t any of that love we used to have….our honeymoon phase was finally over, 2 years later….. I just couldn’t let Chris go. He was all I had…he was all I ever wanted, but I knew it was coming soon.

I knew Chris was going to break up with me at some point. As a woman you just know when a man no longer has interest in you, and it broke my fucking heart.

Currently I was at the triplets house, and I just sensed this vibe from Chris all day. He was constantly in thought and anxious, and it made me sick to my stomach. I know what he was thinking, what he was plotting, how he wanted to go about it, but I couldn’t bring myself to talk to him. I wasn’t sure if his brothers knew because it didn’t seem that way, but man I have never wanted to disappear more than in this moment.

I was watching Chris in the kitchen pacing back and forth, deep in thought. God I hated this, he was so unhappy with our relationship, and trying to make it work, and here I was dragging him along forcing him to do something he doesn’t want to.

Chris had finally walked down to his room, but before going down he looked over at me…..no emotions, no smile, no warmth, his eyes looked saddened and burdened like he was fighting himself to talk to me. I looked into his eyes, and looked away. I couldn’t sit here and hurt myself

About five minutes later my phone vibrated with a text from Chris

My Baby🐣

-Hey, could you come to my room I want to talk

My heart sank…I felt a lump in my throat begin to form. I just wished in that moment I was not in this position, that I didn’t know Chris, and that I didn’t put myself through this for two years.

Reluctantly I got up, telling Nick and Matt I was going down to talk to Chris. I headed down the steps and walked to his room….not wanting to enter, but I took a deep breath and walked in shutting the door behind me

He was sitting on his bed with his head in his hands…make this stop….take this pain away from us

I sat down next to him hoping he’d start talking first. I felt this overbearing feeling of nausea

“I’m so sorry” he said finally looking up

“You don’t have to be…I know where this is going” I said looking over at him

“I just….I just think we shouldn’t be together anymore” he said finally looking at me

“I had a feeling” I said rubbing my lips together in anxiety

“I just feel like we’ve grown apart. I feel like what we had was amazing and I’ll cherish every moment. You were the best thing to happen to me in my whole life, and I love you so fucking much, but I just feel like we’d be better off separate” he said getting tears in his eye

“I should’ve known sooner when everything changed. I’m sorry for that, sorry for not allowing you to feel safe enough to come to me sooner, and express how you felt” I said to him allowing my eyes to get watery

“This isn’t your fault okay. We are humans you know, we grow apart, and although it may suck it’s what’s best for us” he said letting tears falls

“I just love you so much this is hard Chris” I said letting my tears fall too

“I love you so much, okay? I’m just not in love with you anymore” he said sniffling

My heart shattered at those words. The only guy I’ve ever loved, and he’s telling me he fell out of love with me

“I just don’t understand how we got here” I said wiping my nose

“It’s normal. People grow apart, relationships end that’s just how life works, and it’s not fair, but everything happens for a reason” he said wiping his nose

“I know Chris, it’s just hard I’ve loved you for so long, and now we will no longer be together” I said crying a bit harder

“I’m so sorry, I need you to know that you’re the woman I want to want. You have no idea how badly I want that to be you” he said looking down and shaking his head while crying

“I know…and that’s okay” I said in a whisper

“It’s just I’m going to keep pursuing what I’m pursuing, and you’ll be doing what you want, and we just won’t have time for each other, and this will cause us to resent each other. I’d much rather break it off now than to ever grow any form of hate in my heart for you, okay?” He said rubbing my back and crying with me

“Yes…yes I know, and I’m so glad that you’re doing what’s best for you, but this is going to be so fucking hard. I don’t know that I can let you go” I said breaking down even more, choking out broken sobs

“You will okay baby, you will hurt and so will I, but we’re both strong and we will be okay. We will survive this, and who knows it could be the right person at the wrong time. But without taking this break we will not know this” he said wiping his nose again

“I love you Chris. I love you so fucking much” I said sobbing

“I love you, and I will always love you. You will always be my number one girl. You will always be in my life no matter what, but for now we have to take this time away from one another” he said pulling me in to side hug him

“Yes Chris. We will be okay, I will be okay. I will keep it pushing for you. You will always have my heart, and I hope that you eventually see a future with me” I said hugging his arm that was wrapped around me

“But for now you have to let me go, you have to let me let you go. I need you to do that for me” he said pulling away

I leaned away, keeping my head down and nodding. I finally lifted my head up to look into his red eyes

“Okay I can do that for you” I said crying

“You will always be my girl okay. You are my life, and I love you so much” he said smiling at me

“You’ll always be my number one guy. I love you so much” I said smiling back at him

He pulled me in for a hug, and one last kiss

“I’m going to miss you” I said pulling away from him

“I’m going to miss you too, and I hope we’ll eventually cross paths. If you ever need me just know I’m here for you okay. I will always be just one call away. I hope in a few months time we can hang out again as friends” he said smiling at me

“I hope we cross paths too, and I hope we can continue this friendship in the future” I said wiping my eyes

“We will..I’m never not seeing you again” he said laughing a little bit

“I love you” I said looking into his eyes as I choked on my words a bit

“I love you too” he said giving me a reassuring smile

“Should we tell your fans? I won’t be in the videos or with you guys anymore” I asked him

“Only if you want to” he said

“I think we should. Maybe uh you can make a post about it tomorrow, and then I will too” I said nodding at him

“That’s fine with me” he said standing up from his bed

“Okay cool. I uh think we should tell Matt and Nick” I said

“Yeah we should” he said

We both left his room, and walked to the living room where Nick and Matt were.

“Hey guys” Chris said

“Hey you guys okay?” Matt asked

“Um yeah. We just wanted to let you know that we broke up” Chris said

“Oh…” They both said

“Uh yeah it’s for the best, and we’ve decided to full on break apart, so I’m going to be taking time away from you guys as a whole” I said to them

“We’re going to miss you so much” Nick said looking sad

“I’m going to miss you guys too, but maybe we’ll eventually see each other” I said trying not to cry

“We will. I hope nothing but the best for you guys” Matt said smiling at me

I looked at them before fully breaking down

“I love you guys so much, and please never forget me okay” I said crying

“We would never. We love you so fucking much” Nick said getting up and running over to hug me, Matt getting up and joining us in a group hug

We all pulled apart, teary eyed and sad

“I love you guys, and I’ll be seeing you soon. I’m going to head out now” I said wiping my eyes

“We love you, and always reach out to us for anything” Matt said

“I will. Thank you guys so much” I said waving at them

“I’ll walk you out” Chris said wiping his eyes

“Okay” I said giving him a weak smile

Chris walked me down to my car before giving me one last hug, and then he pulled away

“I guess this is bye for now” I said, unlocking my car, and sitting in it. Closing my door and turning the car on and rolling my window down

“It’s not bye, it’s see you later” Chris said wiping his tears again

I smiled at him putting my car in reverse

“I’ll see you later then Chris” I said to him slowly backing up

“I’ll see you around” he said trying to give me a reassuring smile

“See you” I said giving him one last smile before rolling up my window, and backing out his driveway, and then driving down the road

Leaving behind the man I’ve loved for two years, the man who was my everything. Just completely driving out of his life and potentially never seeing him again. Of course we would love to see each other again, but that could be 1 year from now or 10 years from now….I allowed myself to break down in my car. This was going to be so fucking hard.

The next day Chris and I decided that he would make the post and collab it with me, so I can share it as well, but he picked the picture and wrote the caption attaching the song see you later by Jenna Raine. He posted it and within minutes the comments and DM’s were flooding in. Our post getting shared and edits immediately being made. Nick and Matt even shared our post adding comments on it, and what to expect from them now that I’m no longer in the picture. So many people accepted our decision, and so many people were sad about us splitting. Most of his fans loved us, and they were so distraught.

I hadn't read the post yet I was scared to have to finalize this decision we made, but when I did I broke down immediately

❤️nicolassturniolo, matthew.sturniolo, sturniolo.triplets and 650,000 others

christophersturniolo: I have loved this girl for the past two years of my life, and I will continue to love her. We have decided to separate as it’s what’s best for us in this chapter of our lives. We will always love one another, and we hope that one day we cross paths again. Y/N may be the right person at the wrong time, and while we figure this out we’d really appreciate it if you guys respect our privacy. She will no longer be in our videos, and we want you guys to respect that decision we have made. We love you guys dearly❤️. But most importantly I love Y/N with my whole heart….she will always be my number one girl. Even though you didn’t make it to the end of my story, I’ll always have the corner folded down on your page; because it was one of my favorites. I love you Y/N🥀

This message broke me. I loved Chris so much, but I had to let him go. I hope to see him in the future.

The End

This was pure self indulgence and now I’m sad LMAOAO. But let me know if you liked this one 🥹🖤

-J💅🏽

#sturniolo triplets #sturniolo x reader #sturniolo #sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo triplets imagines #chris sturniolo #chris sturniolo imagine #Spotify