#i will probably mellow out a little bit after today but i am (and the rest of yirlies(gn)) allowed to be annoyed abt this thing

[tsu22]

What he says in post race interviews: 

"I just saw the replay and it wasn’t blatant. I’ve gone in, locked and crashed into him. I feel like I held a pretty tight line. It was maybe a little bit me, there’s a lot of blind spots, but all we needed was to give each other 30 more centimetres and then we were good."

"Like, of course you never want contact to a point where the other guy goes off but I just saw a replay just before I did the media and I don’t feel as bad about it now, of course I still wish it didn’t happen. I think it’s one where for sure I’ll take a bit more responsibility, but I can’t say it’s 100% my fault."

What the FIA decision says:

"The stewards considered that Ricciardo's attempt to pass Tsunoda was both too late and too optimistic and find Ricciardo wholly at fault."

What I say: YUKI WAS ALREADY AHEAD HIM AND IN THE PROCESS OF MAKING TURN 6 WHEN A WILD DICCIARDO BARRELLED INTO THE SIDE OF HIS CAR AND SENT IT AIRBORNE. IT WASN'T "A LITTLE BIT HIM" AND SEEING AS YUKI WAS AHEAD GOING INTO THE TURN, HE SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE ONE MINDFUL OF YUKI'S POTENTIAL BLINDSPOTS IF BEING NON-VISIBLE TO YUKI DUE TO BLINDSPOTS WAS ONE OF HIS CONCERNS. IF SPACE IS HIS EXCUSE, HE CAME BARRELING DOWN THE INSIDE-WHERE'S THE SPACE HE'S SUPPOSED TO LEAVE YUKI? DICCIARDO CAN SAY WHATEVER EXCUSE HE WANTS, BUT HE'S SOLELY AT FAULT AND SHOULD GROW UP AND ACCEPT SOME RESPONSIBILITY.

Sorry for the caps and long message but oh my god, the entitlement. People criticize George but this is about as close to a "he was in my way, i'm entitled to that area on the track" excuse as a driver could get. George also admits and apologizes when he's found at-fault for something. To say this instead of apologizing afterwards? I can only hope karma treats him good and well these final two races.

(anon im including ur other ask below)

NO. your asks are not too much, they’re exactly the inside of my brain for the past few hrs.

i didnt watch the race, and wont watch the re run, so i clearly dont have a lot to go off abt this matter other than: the facts you dished out above, tiny clip of the incident that f1 posted on twt, and info i read post-race on the internet. but I WHOLEHEARTEDLY AGREE WITH EVERYTHING you said above. fia ruled out that its fully his fault but him trying to shift some of the blame to the dude he rammed and dnf is soooo fucking shitty of him (man icb i am with fia in this ehdjjskskw, yuki first everyone second). i tried to be chill but, just like u said, the fact that everyone and their grandmas celebrated his comeback on track at the expense of yuki’s race and points makes me want to be a hater (just for a couple of days, join me 🤡). praying the last two races will be kind to yuki (and unnecessarily cruel to car #3).

#and anon! i know it is overplayed but… #yuki has seat next year bur he doesn hehe 😉 #i know his seat next szn is absolutely not related to yuki’s race today but we can hang onto that a bit tighter shxjjsjdjdkd #anon thanks for coming to my inbox and sharing ur thoughts #i will probably mellow out a little bit after today but i am (and the rest of yirlies(gn)) allowed to be annoyed abt this thing #ppl unfollowing me in 3…2…1…

[bratzforchris]

Sunflowers

Summary: Chris gets distracted easily. Like really, really easily. When he gets separated from Matt and Nick in the mall, he meets a lovely soul who understands just a little bit more than anyone else.

Pairing: ADHD!Chris x autistic!feminine reader

Warnings: Neurodivergent overstimulation, getting lost, crying, brief mentions of ableism

Word Count: 2.1k

A/N: The sunflower lanyard (pictured above) signifies that someone has a hidden or invisible disability and may need extra assistance/patience/kindness. I am not saying or assuming Chris actually has ADHD. If he doesn't, cool, if he does, also cool! This is all for fun and for diversity in the fandom<3 Enjoy!!

ADHD was a difficult thing to live with. It was more than just the stereotype of “Oh look! Squirrel!”. It was a constant condition that caused a lot of impact on one’s day-to-day life and happiness. Chris knew this better than just about anyone. Having been diagnosed in middle school, he found himself on a constant pendulum between spaced out with his head all over the place and extra hyper. Though he was medicated for it, there were still days where his body and mind were consumed with extra hyperactivity and energy, meaning he could be easily distracted, rambunctious, and fidgety. 

Both Matt and Nick were aware of their younger brother’s diagnosis and were extremely supportive of it, letting Chris run wild when he needed to and gently reminding him to take his meds and do his other daily tasks now that they no longer lived with their parents. The youngest really couldn’t have asked for a better support system, but that didn’t mean that there weren’t days where his brain betrayed him for quite literally no reason. 

⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡

“Do you want your lanyard, Chris?” Matt asked as he grabbed his car keys off the hook near the garage door. 

The key rack held all of the boy’s keys and things they would need when they left the house, but it also held Chris’ green and yellow sunflower lanyard. These lanyards were a universal symbol that someone had a hidden or invisible disability and might need some extra kindness and assistance when they left their house. Chris had fought the idea at first, claiming that he didn’t need that; he rarely struggled in public. However, the change after he had agreed to try one due to Nick’s pleading to give it a shot had been immense. Strangers no longer looked at him like he was rude when he couldn’t help to butt in or play with his fidget toys as an adult, nor did shop owners hastily bat his hands away when he just wanted to touch things in stores. Of course, there were still bigots, but the improvement was more than he could have asked for. 

Now, Chris possessed his own sunflower lanyard, complete with a small card attached that read “I have ADHD. I can act restless and tend to fidget. I may act on impulse and have trouble concentrating. Please be patient and understanding.” and had both Matt and Nick’s names and phone numbers on it in case of an emergency. His lanyard also had a few pins, buttons, and pop-its on it so that the boy would always have something to fidget with. 

“It’s probably a good idea,” Nick added, coming down the stairs and typing out something on his phone. “Christmas is next week. The mall is going to be busy.”

Being triplets, Matt and Nick were incredibly in-tune with Chris and each other, and both boys could tell that today was going to be a more hyper, easily distracted day for their younger brother. Normally, they would’ve postponed busy, crowded spaces and must-do errands for a day where Chris was feeling more mellowed out, but they flew back home to Boston in just a few short days and had yet to buy Christmas presents for, well, anyone. 

Slowly thinking over the situation at hand, Chris grabbed his lanyard off the hook and placed it over his neck, but it wasn’t long until he had moved on to something else. “Do you guys think that there are triplets just like us?” he asked as Matt corralled him out the door. “But like, in China or something?”

The drive to the mall had been much longer than anticipated with all the holiday traffic, which allowed Chris more time to let his mind wander, blurting out every random thought he had as he played with the shark pop-it on his lanyard. Luckily, Nick quickly engaged the youngest in all his conversations so that Matt could focus, his own head spinning as he tried to keep up with Chris’ mile-a-minute chatter. 

“We should go people watching,” Chris announced as Matt parked their car inside of the heavily filled parking garage. “We could probably see some crazy shit. Speaking of which, did you guys see that episode of Live PD last night?”

Matt and Nick shared a glance over Chris’ head as they walked into the mall. The more Chris talked, the more he began to fidget, earning stares from onlookers, despite his lanyard. The mall was insanely crowded, which could either help or hurt. Somedays, Chris absolutely thrived in chaos, able to hyperfocus and get tasks done in record time. On others, his brain became so stimulated by chaos and change that he would shut down, often losing his ability to executive function in the process. Today was an absolute toss up. 

“Let the games begin.” Nick mumbled, grabbing his brothers’ hands and sliding through the crowds. 

As ‘cringy’ as it was, the triplets still held hands with each other in public, especially after Chris had received his ADHD diagnosis. Matt and Nick felt an almost protective sense over their younger brother, opting to help keep him safe when his brain didn’t always remind him to do that himself. 

⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡

Things had been going fine for well over an hour now, but it was starting to become too much for Chris. They had already gotten presents for their dad and Justin, and were now on the hunt for a gift for their mother. As much as they loved and adored MaryLou, shopping for a woman as 20 year old men in a mall this crowded was a task. 

The youngest triplet was beginning to become overstimulated. His own thoughts had already been so loud and so chaotic this morning, and to add hoards of people, blaring Christmas music, screaming kids, and overwhelming smells from the food court wasn’t helping. He hadn’t meant to get separated from Nick and Chris; the boys had been poring over the jewelry counter in Macy’s when Chris dropped Nick’s hand, opting to pull his Airpods out of his pocket. Maybe if he could listen to the music he liked and that calmed him down, he could manage the rest of this trip without a meltdown. 

Chris had just slipped his earbuds in and pressed play on Life of a Dark Rose when he realized that neither Matt nor Nick was standing next to him. Not yet panicked, he looked around the floor of the department store, searching for Matt’s Red Sox hat or Nick’s blond hair above the crowd. When that didn’t work, he simply shot a quick text in their sibling group chat that read where are you guys??. Much to his discomfort, the text quickly came back with a ‘cannot be delivered’ message, making the brunette curse when he realized that the signal in the store was awful. 

“Excuse me, ma’am. Did you see where my brothers went? They have tattoos. One’s blond and has a nose ring, the other was wearing a hat?” Chris asked the lady at the jewelry counter hopefully. 

Either not noticing his lanyard or not caring, the employee turned her back to Chris, leaving him desperate. He didn’t know his way around this mall at all, his phone wasn’t working, and it was beyond crowded. How was he supposed to find Matt and Nick? What if they left without him? He couldn’t drive and he had left his wallet with Nick. How would he get home? This was just a glimpse into the anxiety that circulated through Chris’ mind whenever he became overstimulated. 

The brunette felt his eyes beginning to grow wet, cursing himself under his breath. He wouldn’t, he couldn’t cry. Not here. Chris wiped a few stray tears that were running down his cheeks and began to retreat to a quiet area of the store to contemplate his next move. The last thing he needed was for a ‘fan’ to snap a photo of him crying and overstimulated and post it online. 

The children’s toy area proved to be the perfect place for him to hide. With all the stock having been bought out for the day in the holiday rush, the department was completely empty. Chris sat down on one of the leather benches, running his hands through his hair as a stim and anxiously checking his phone in hopes of regaining signal. He was so caught up in his anxious stimming and trying not to have a meltdown, that he hadn’t even noticed someone appear beside him. 

“Are you okay? I saw your lanyard,” You offered kindly. “You don’t have to talk if you don’t want to.”

Chris looked up at you, taking in your appearance. You were absolutely beautiful, dressed in a soft, sensory friendly outfit with a purple cow Squishmallow clutched to your side. That wasn’t what caught his attention, though. What truly caught his attention was the sunflower lanyard hanging around your own neck. Glancing briefly at the card, Chris noticed it read “I’m autistic”. 

“Can I sit?” You asked, gesturing to the empty spot next to the boy. 

Chris nodded, wiping his eyes and clearing his throat. “I can’t find my brothers.” he admitted tearfully. 

“Is that who’s with you?” You asked knowingly, having been in similar situations yourself. “Do you want to call them?”

“I can’t. My phone won’t send the fucking text and they were just with me and I can’t find them. What if they left me?” the more Chris talked, the upset he became, anxiously chewing on his nails. 

“Hey hey hey, it’s okay. They wouldn’t leave you. Would you like a fidget?” You pulled a tangle from your purse, holding it out for the boy to take.

Chris stared at you for a moment before tentatively taking the toy from you, instantly focusing on the colors and movement of the plastic. “...thank you.” he whispered. 

“Would it be okay if I touched you?” You asked gently. From your own experience, you knew that it was important in situations like these to ask for consent to touch someone who was overstimulated. “My lanyard has my emergency contact on it. Does yours? Maybe we can work together to find your brothers.”

Chris nodded softly, allowing you to softly look at his lanyard and identify both Matt and Nick’s phone numbers and names. By some miracle, your phone had much better service than Chris’ did, allowing you to let both brothers know where you were and that Chris was looking for them. 

“So, tell me about yourself if you want to.” You tried to make easy conversation to take the brunette’s mind off his current overstimulation and panic. 

“‘M a YouTuber,” Chris muttered softly, highly subdued. “And I like rap music and y’know, I have ADHD.” when he saw your soft, blushy smile and attentive listening, Chris became more animated. 

“I’ve always thought YouTube would be a cool job. I’m a pet sitter. I love animals so much. They’re one of my special interests.” You nodded to your cow stuffed animal. 

Chris remembered reading about the term when he was doing some self reflecting on being neurodivergent. Although he didn’t experience them himself, he knew that they were an enormous part of being autistic, and he felt grateful that you were willing to share something like that with him. 

“How did you, um, find me?” Chris asked shyly. 

“Well, I came to see if they had any stuffed animals because I love them, but instead I found you.” You smiled, fiddling with your own fidget toy. 

You and Chris continued to chat as you waited for his brothers. The difference in his personality when you first found him to now was like night and day. He had become more animated over the course of your conversation, talking with his hands, eyes aglow. You looked up when you noticed two men who looked eerily similar to Chris walk up next to you. In your head, you connected the dots that the boys must have been triplets. The blond who approached you had a hard look on his face as he noticed his brother talking to a stranger, but when his eyes caught your lanyard, he visibly relaxed. 

“Matt! Nick!” Chris squealed, leaping off the bench and pulling his brothers into a hug. 

You watched with a soft smile, thinking the sibling’s embrace was cute until the brother in the Red Sox hat turned to you. 

“Thank you,” he told you sincerely. “Thank you for helping him.”

“It’s really not a problem.” You were becoming shy under the attention, but Chris came up and wrapped his arm around you. 

“I love her,” Chris said, before blushing as he realized what he had said. “Not like that! I…I mean…” he stuttered. 

“I’ll give you my number,” You chuckled, standing on your tiptoes and kissing Chris on the cheek. “For being such a sweetheart.”

tags ♡:  @jake-and-johnnies-slut @chrissfavwh3re @suyqa @chrissturnswife @mbsbaby @herxysc-blog @lovingchrissposts @caffeinatedscorpio @spencereidenthusiast @crazychrisl0v3r @sturnioloxlver @whicked-hazlatwhore @blahbel668 @sturncakez @junnniiieee07 @biggesthat3r @sturniolowhore @patscorner @julesgrl @0strawberrysorbet0 @strombolilovr @matt444nixi @remussbitch @devthepoet1221 @mattyblover07 @loisnotaa @mollyquinnxoxo @graysturns @pepsicolapussy333 @ginswife @emmagirouard @athaliahxoxo @bitchydragonparadise @ilydeaky @soggyslugg169 @m00n-0n-paws @books0fever @stingerayyy2 @sunsetsturniolos @mimi-luvzyu @raysmayhem-72 @faygo-frog @oobleoob @billsslutt @aemrsy

note ♡: if you'd like to bed added to my taglist, click here <3

#chris sturniolo #chris sturniolo smut #chris sturniolo x you #chris sturniolo x reader #chris sturniolo imagines #chris sturniolo fluff #chris sturniolo fanfic #christopher sturniolo #christopher owen sturniolo #matt sturniolo #matt sturniolo smut #matt sturniolo fluff #matt sturniolo imagine #matt sturniolo x reader #matthew sturniolo smut #matthew sturniolo fanfic #matthew sturniolo imagine #matthew bernard sturniolo #matthew sturniolo x reader #matthew sturniolo #nicolas sturniolo #the sturniolo triplets #sturniolo smut #sturniolo triplets

[orion4ever]

hi so im the person who requested the derren/outcasted reader and AHHH it was great!!! thank you so much!!!

i wanted to request another ren fic, this like with a trans masc reader

basically its just ren comes out to the reader as trans and then we’re just like “wait your trans? me too!”

have a good day or night! don’t rush and take care of yourself! thank you!

Author’s Note: Hello! I am glad you liked it , I was worried I didn’t portray her correctly! I hope you enjoy this one as well ^^ Although since we didn’t get much info about Renee and her transition for now, I wrote this under the assumption that she has warmed up and mellowed out over time.

Also I totally wrote this with them being in high school but then remembered that in Step 3, they are probably not in high school anymore so I changed it to be a local community college.

Pairing: Renee Murray x TransMasc! MC

🥾🍁

Renee was worried about people’s opinions of hers changing when they found out that she was trans.

Would she be seen as somewhat hypocritical to her younger self? Would people still want to be friends even if she was a girl? How would they treat her now?

While she is way more happy and content now truly understanding her feelings and identity, coming out is a very nerve-wracking experience.

You had been the first to know, of course. You have been Renee’s friend(and crush) for a long time and she felt that no matter what; you would be there.

She just wasn’t expecting what came next…

The school day just ended, you were packing up your backpack to go home when you felt a hand hold on to your shoulder. When you turned around, it was Ren; her newly dyed red hair glimmering in the classroom's fluorescent lights.

“MC,” Renee greeted, her mouth appearing to smile but her eyebrows were worried.

“Oh, Hey Renee” you greeted in return, slinging your heavy backpack over your shoulder. “We’re still hanging out at the bridge today?” You asked, tilting your head towards your friend.

“Uh. Yeah, obviously… Let’s hurry. I-.” She paused on her words before continuing. “I want to tell you something important.” She finished, feeling more sure of yourself.

“Something important? Important enough that you can’t tell me here?” You had teased a little bit, moving towards the door while Renee followed with a nervous chuckle.

“I want to tell you somewhere more private, so yeah.” She answered, walking out the classroom door and through the hallway with them.

“I understand.” You nodded.

After crowd-surfing and dodging other students, the both of you got off campus and made your way over to the familiar patch of woods near the hiking trail.

While the trip felt short for you, to Renee; this trip over to the bridge alcove felt like hours. She overthought your reaction to her coming out as a girl and played around with her gloves to distract herself.

“Is there something wrong?” You had asked, stopping in front of the diner on the way to the remote bridge. “You’ve been a little restless..?” You added, looking gently at her.

Her unease lessened when she noticed your genuine expression, appreciating how supportive you are.

“I will be ok... It's just related to what I wanted to tell you.” Renee reassured, who started walking again.

“You’re kinda worrying me a little bit, Ren” you admitted, following a bit behind her. “Is it something bad?” You asked.

Renee paused a little bit but answered, peaking over her shoulder at you. “Depends on what you think is ‘bad’..”

You didn’t reply, you didn’t have a clue what this secret information could be.

Finally, the two of you made it, Renee got comfortable and leaned on the bridge. While she didn’t say it straight up ;she was hinting for you to join her side.

You stepped towards her but didn’t lean on the bridge. “Ren, What's wrong?” You asked again. “Did something happen?”

Renee looked nervous but replied “No, nothing happened. I have something I need to tell you.” She took a deep breath before continuing.

“I need to be honest, I have been having identity issues; for most of my life at this point.”

She admits, her hand moving towards her nape. 

“After a while, I think I finally get it.” Renee then moved her gaze away from the bridge and faced you.

“I am a girl. I’m trans..”

The woods went silent, the both of you staring at each other. Renee teared up a little, really worried that she was about to lose you over this. Before the silent woods could swallow her, you replied.

“Oh! Me too!” You chuckled. Renee went deadpanned, her hand that was resting on her nape fell to her side.

“what.” She raised an eyebrow. “Oh, Uh. Not the girl part, I trans too!” You elaborated with an equally nervous smile. Renee, just in case asked.

“Do you accept me?” You looked over surprised that she would think you wouldn’t.

“Of course! This is awesome, I am really happy that you finally understand yourself!”

You said supportively.

“I can say I understand too. I guess we both get to start this new journey together huh?” You smiled.

“When did you know you were a guy?” Renee asked, acknowledging that you came out too.

“A while ago. I just didn’t find a moment to tell you.” You shrugged a little, shoving your cold hands in your jacket pockets.

The two of you stood there in silence, Renee turned back towards the side of the bridge. You joined by her side. Renee sheepishly put her pale hand in your pocket to hold your hand, which you held back.

“Is this ok?” Renee asked, side-eyeing you.

“Yeah.” You said quietly with a little blush.

It was silent again, but there was more question that you needed an answer to.

“What do wanna be referred to now? Still Ren?” You side-eyed her back.

“Call me Renee.” She answered with a smile.

“Okay, Renee” you replied for the last time, rubbing your thumb on her hand.

#fanfic #olnf #our life now and forever #orion4ever #gb patch #olnf ren #olnf darren #olnf renee #olnf mc #renee murray x reader #ren murray x reader #darren murray x reader #darren murray #ren murray #renee murray

[symphonyincoordination]

Charles tea set appreciation. I love that he drinks his booze out of his dainty little teacup.

His tea is identified as Earl Grey (I think in Mash Olympics?) which is exactly what I would assume he was drinking. I am sure he prefers it in the “proper” way, with no milk or sugar and a slice of lemon. I can’t remember if we see if he uses bagged or loose leaf tea, but I suspect he would go for loose leaf by choice, perhaps tolerating bagged at the 4077.

I also don’t remember if any other varieties of his tea are named. I see him as mostly a black tea drinker, but maybe he acquires a taste for green tea in Tokyo. If he does he definitely gets really into the elaborate preparation and brewing it “properly.” I bet he went to a tea ceremony on R&R at least once, and then bored everybody silly relying it at length. He’d probably like those blooming teas. I think he’d be snobby about herbal tea initially, but I could see him maybe getting to like some after he mellows a bit. I can imagine him enjoying like a relaxing chamomile or something after the war. He’d hate those fun tea blends you can get today, like cupcake flavour or whatever. At least publicly. He might enjoy them secretly.

100% he only drinks out of bone china and swears he can taste the difference

#mash #mash 4077 #charles emerson winchester iii #didn’t realise I had so many thoughts about Charles and tea but there you go #I think he acquired the teapot in Tokyo but the cups are from home #not the Winchester’s finest though they for sure have multiple sets

[jade-of-mourning]

hiiii lychee :))

as you can see I have too much free time on my hands. but I have a decent amount to say today, so prepare yourself

I’m gonna try and keep this organized and maybe short so 1: do you have any more thoughts on the avatar mako au to share because it’s been rolling around in my brain a lot and I want to know what you have to say about it bcs the way your brain works is so. hajdhskapxn/pos

2: mako learning to draw by engraving his parents’ faces in the dirt of an alleyway over and over and over for years even as he starts to forget their faces. mako who wishes he could’ve afforded paper and charcoal at eight to put down something permanent, something accurate. mako getting their family photo from yin and giving her the scarf, redrawing the picture on the nicest paper he can find to give to her as well. artist mako,, save me artist mako,,,

3: more fem mako thoughts but makorrasami love triangle/eventual polycule(?) except they’re all girls. I just feel like the pining after your team captain who you now do know is gay except it’s because she’s dating a rich girl who’s also very hot is just a whole lot more fun than what they had going on in canon because. girls but sports au. sooo in love w that. also I don’t think makorra would get together in b1 like canon did for a couple reasons. for one, the girl trauma in addition to general trauma of being a homeless orphan. touch and gestures of affection from a person she doesn’t know well yet would probably be a no-no, and korra seems like a very touchy person, just in the natural way that her space is yours and your space is hers. also her energy? like obviously mako would come around but korra in b1 is so much more excited about the world than mako and I think that would kind of, like, intimidate her. (<-also reasons makorra could’ve worked later on but not when they happened) but as the series progresses, korra mellows and mako gets used to her. it works.

but then how does masami happen so early? because asami is the moon to korra’s sun. she’s calm and a careful thinker and after korra’s exuberance breaks down mako’s walls a little bit, asami would be able to slip in being everything mako imagines herself wanting. also more than financially stable. so masami becomes a thing, and korra is jealous, but she’s not sure of who which I personally think is so funny

but yeah that’s basically it. I always love how you take my silly little commentary and give actual thoughtful replies, it makes my day 😭

with love

🐌

snailon! good to see you here haha i totally didn't die for like two weeks what fjsgjhjkgfhs (i'm so sorry i took so long that you thought you imagined this ask hhh)

okay i actually have not thought about it for a hot minute but get this… i get like 40 hours a week back because no more percussion! so i have so much time!!! dude i'm going to rewatch lok AGAIN and then brainrot some more. avatar mako's love hate relationship with the entire fucking world is the only thing about it in my head. i'm sorry i don't have a lot to say about this au right now :(( it'll happen,,, one day,,,,

oh! (sobbing!) personally i am a fan of aspiring writer mako but also artist mako is extremely valid and i love the hc's you've built around it :)

girl for girl for girl makorrasami is really the best version of it tbh! love all your thoughts and actually that's a hilarious angle of korra getting the Sapphic Confirmation but it's not a good thing bc the love interest is actually dating a girl who is NOT korra except oh shit this girl is also super hot and attractive. what the fuck is this. korra my favorite girl in the world ever you're allowed to like all the girls in the world if you want and no one has the right to fault you for it.

anyway thank YOU for always sharing your thoughts with me!! i love to hear it and i'm sorry there was such a delay bhjfjgfh i'll get to your other ask soon promise. my commentary is a little bit dead today but i wanted to get this out instead of leaving it rotting in my inbox forever because i promise i have been turning it over in my head for a minute now :P have a good day snailon!

#lychee acquires and answers asks

[wartakes]

What Comes Next? (OLD ESSAY)

This essay was originally posted on January 21st, 2021.

This is the essay that actually responds to January 6th (as the one that was posted on January 6th was actually before everything happened and had nothing to do with it, lol). (Full essay below the cut).

So, I guess it’s finally time to talk about the last couple weeks.

On the morning of January 6th I had just posted an essay I’d rant-written over an hour or two the night prior about an op-ed on Military.com calling for war criminal Robert Bales to be pardoned by now former-President Donald Trump (thankfully, Bales does not appear to have been included in Trump’s last minute Pardonpalooza – sucks to suck Bobby Boy). I figured that would be the thing I’d be the angriest or distressed about that day, or even that week.

Yeah, so, we know what happened in the second half of the day.

I’ll be honest, I intended to write something about all this sooner. God knows that I’m a little late to the game on all this. A lot of my favorite analysts, podcasters, and other content creators have all already done their bits on the January 6th insurrection/riot/whatever by now. But I decided to sit tight before I put my thoughts down on “paper” as it were for a couple reasons.

The first reason was equal parts paranoia and selfishness. I held my fire because with the threats and increasingly tense situation surrounding the inauguration, I wanted to wait until after Biden was sworn in before I wrote anything because – much like my Bales essay being overcome by events – I was afraid I’d write something only to have an actual coup de tat kick off five minutes after posting it (Note: as of writing this, Biden has successfully been sworn in and is in the White House probably saying “listen Jack” to his staff repeatedly).

The second reason was, I honestly didn’t know what to write and didn’t know exactly how I felt about everything and I still am struggling. Since January 6th, I’ve felt just about every emotion I think is possible at least once a day – often more than once. I’ve mellowed out a lot since then and feel a lot better today, but I’ll be real with you all, I was kind of a wreck for a bit with everything going on (if you’re worried, I’m ok, and thank you).

This essay is going to be a bit disjointed compared to some of my other works, but this is just something I wanted to get off my chest and out of my head to help myself make sense of things, and maybe it’ll help other folks in that way too. I’ll try and follow it up with something approaching intelligent analysis on how we should think about this and deal with it going forward. Hopefully in the next few weeks I can get back to my usual fare. For now, let’s do this.

How Do I Feel?

I’ve spent most of my adult life learning and training to be a national security professional and then (finally) starting to work in the field. I’ve typically been what you’d call a generalist. I’ve dipped my toe in a bit of everything, but I’ve largely focused on conflict between states in all its various forms throughout my academic and professional career.

With that in mind, another reason I was slow to write about this was that I’m not the best person to. While I’ve always been aware of and concerned about the dangers of the far-right and white nationalism and all the other toxic elements in American politics, it wasn’t until the last four years – and the final stages of my radicalization as a leftist in the last year in particular – that I truly began to appreciate the gravity of the threat. I’ve never focused on any of this in my studies or work. I’ve never been an expert on far-right paramilitary violence and domestic terrorism and all of that. I’ve never even been an expert on terrorism and political violence in general. I watched what happened on the 6th unfold in real time over livestream, talking with my close friends and family as it occurred – which in a way, made it even harder and take even more time to process it. I’ve seen plenty of events unfold like that in other countries before, but it was just that: foreign. Something that happens over there, not back here.

In a way, I had a massive cognitive dissonance about the event as it was happening. On one hand, it was entirely shocking and surprising that this could happen in the United States of America of all places, in the 21st century. And yet, at the same time, I couldn’t help but think “well of course something like this finally happened, how could it not have?” We’ve been building up to something like this for years now. It didn’t help that while I now view the government and many institutions with a much more critical eye given my change in politics, I can’t deny the monuments and symbology still hold some kind of value to me emotionally, and seeing far-right Trump supporters bashing their way inside and running amok fucked me up some (this in addition to some personal connections I have to the Capitol that made it all hit a little close to home, but I don’t really want to get into that here).

So, where am I going with this? That’s a good question. I guess my point here is, amidst the mix of emotions I felt over the past week or two, the overriding one was fear. I was scared. And I’m here to tell you that if you were scared as well, that’s ok. That’s valid, and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. Was what happened at the Capitol as bad as it could have been? No. I’ve heard a lot of 9/11 comparisons and while I agree some are ham fisted, and while January 6th was nowhere near as deadly as 9/11, it still left me with the same sense of fear and uncertainty that event did when I was a kid. It was still a traumatic event in a lot of ways, and if you feel scared by it, don’t let anyone make you feel like shit for feeling what you feel.

I’ve seen a lot of people cracking jokes about what happened on twitter and elsewhere. That’s fine. Honestly, one reason it’s been hard to make sense of everything after the 6th has been the fact that while the insurrection was serious, it was also in many ways, laughable in its events. I mean, c’mon. You have the Q Shaman dressed up in a fur faux-Viking outfit. How can you not joke about this shit in some shape or form? It’s impossible not to.

I’ve absolutely made a lot of gallows humor among friends myself to deal with what happened. As Hawkeye Pierce once said on M*A*S*H, sometimes joking is the only way you can open your mouth without screaming. When this becomes unhelpful or hurtful is when the joking becomes less about working through something you’re feeling and more about trivializing it and dismissing it as something that is not worth your concern and attention. That is not fine, and it pisses me off in a major way. Not only does it feel like punching down, but it also feels like it misses the implications of what happened for us as leftists and the country as a whole.

Again, was this as bad is it could have been? No. Was it the worst thing ever to happen to or in America? Not by a long shot. But it is extremely concerning and should be a warning to us for what might come next. Even if the riots themselves didn’t amount to much, and in many places were laughable, it was also extremely fortunate they were not worse – as there are now plenty of indications that they could have been much, much worse.

While there are a lot of people on the left that have been keenly aware of the threat of right-wing violence for years now, this may be a wakeup call for many who either weren’t as aware or didn’t think it was as serious or extensive as it’s turned out to be. While we all may have been affected in different ways and to different degrees but the last few weeks, what we need to agree on is that far-right violence and extremism is a problem that is only going to get worse before it gets better, even now that Trump has left the White House. Trump was only the beginning. We need to brace ourselves because what has become clear is that the last few years if we want to stop things much worse than what happened on January 6th from occurring in the future.

Where Do We Go From Here?

Ok, so I just disgorged about a thousand words or more in change at you about my own jumble of personal feelings about all this. I feel like I owe you something a bit more thought out on what we should be trying to do from here on in to deal with the oncoming wave of chuddery.

First off, there are two important ideas that need to be understood in tandem – to some folks these may be obvious but I’m going to state them anyway to drive the point home: 1.) this is not a problem that cropped up overnight; and 2.) this is not a problem that will be taken care of in four years or eight years or even more than that. The current form of far-right extremism that we face is not one that suddenly cropped up after Trump became President. It has its roots going back more than thirty years. The problems of white supremacy in particular are entwined with the very founding of the nation. These are problems that are going to need to be dealt with over the course of a generation – more likely, multiple generations. It is going to require us to fundamentally change as a society, which I do not believe is impossible, but I do think it will be a long and hard effort with many twists and turns and missteps along the way.

Another key takeaway that I don’t think that a lot of people on the left are going to need convincing on is that this is not a problem that can or should be solved solely through arrests and imprisonment and violent crackdown from the state. I’ll say right now that some new Patriot Act II: The Patrioting, is 100% not the answer. As a national security professional, I can tell you right now that if the government can’t stop what happened on the 6th or any of the other incidences of far-right violence in recent years with the massive toolbox of domestic surveillance and counter-terrorism infrastructure it already has – and arguably shouldn’t have in the first place, there’s no way some new domestic version of the Patriot Act is going to do it (and it’ll just get turned against leftists and minorities anyway, let’s be real). Giving more money to cops certainly isn’t going to solve shit – especially when a number of them are part of these movements, as well as more than a few troops in the military).

That being said, another thing that the left may need more convincing on is that some of these people will never be convinced to give up what they believe. That is not to say that all of them are lost causes. I don’t believe that every person who voted for Trump is a QAnon adherent or a fascist in waiting, and they can’t be forgotten and need to be brought along for the ride in building a better world – after all, I became a socialist because I want life to be better for everyone, not just everyone I like who believes in my ideology. Likewise, I don’t believe that every person that gets caught up in far-right extremist movements is necessarily a lost cause. Some of them may be able to be helped through some kind of de-programming and de-radicalization effort (there’s a lot of discourse on how appropriate the cult comparison is QAnon, but I think this is an apt one), but we need to accept that some people are never going to surrender their beliefs and will always consider people like us as an existential threat.

Where am I going with this? Well, here’s that part that may not go over as well. I definitely fear state overreach and abuse of power in light of what happened on the sixth – which I hope was already demonstrated by my apprehension about any kind of new domestic terror law. But even with all of that in mind, some of these people are going to have to be arrested and go to prison.

Let me be clear: the criminal justice system and law enforcement in this country are fundamentally flawed. I think they need to be completely rebuilt – not reformed but torn down and rebuilt from scratch. Not only that, but they also need to be rebuilt as part of a system that prioritizes social services that prevent crime and violence from occurring long before it ever gets to the point of involving law enforcement or any form of detention or corrections – and that those need to be done in as humane a way as possible. But I still think they need to exist. Why? The same reason I think a military will still need to exist. Because no matter what, somehow, some way, there will always be someone who wishes to do harm for one reason or another. We can try and help as many people who have been drawn in by far-right movements as we can, but we need to come to terms before we get deeper into the struggle that we cannot help them all.

What that point gets across is that dealing with this problem in the years to come isn’t just going to be accomplished by doing all the good things we’ve always wanted to do. It is going to require us doing things that some leftists may be fundamentally uncomfortable with. Things that involve the use of force and wielding of power by the state. I wasn’t happy at all about the fact we deployed more troops in Washington D.C. than we have in both Iraq and Afghanistan combined in order to guarantee what normally should be a peaceful transfer of power. But as much as that made me uncomfortable and scared and angry, I can’t say that it wasn’t entirely necessary.

I am not saying we need to discard our own principles to deal with extremism. In fact, I would argue against that strongly and forcefully. If we acted in a way contrary to every concept of social justice and human rights and democracy that we claim to uphold, then we’d be no better than those who passed the Patriot Act, let alone any authoritarian police state that has existed past, present, or future – be it fascist or socialist. But there are things that we are going to need to address and come to terms with as a movement. I don’t begin to claim to have the answers, but I do know there are tough conversations that will need to be had. I believe in a better world, but not in a utopian one. We need to come to terms with that going forward.

Keep On Keeping On

I’ve been a little all over the map since the 6th, but as my mind has cleared some, if nothing else I’ve emerged with a renewed sense of purpose in the aftermath of what happened that day. It has reaffirmed the beliefs I started to be honest with myself about almost a year ago when the mask finally began to come off to me. It has made me more certain about what side I am on and the kind of future that I want to live in.

While I still believe things can and will get better, I also unfortunately believe they will likely get worse before they do. As Joe Biden is inaugurated, there are already signs that the disillusioned once-QAnon faithful who for so long “trusted the plan” only to be let down and questioning everything they believe, are being targeted by more violent and accelerationist far-right groups for recruitment. There are also plenty of people who will likely maintain their loyalty to the QAnon theory in some shape or form and that movement is in the process of an uncertain transformation. And while many Republican have tried to disconnect themselves from far-right elements, there are still more than a few who not only remain tied to them but court them as a power base. This is a problem that is going to stick around in multiple forms for a long time, whether it be QAnon, a Q offshoot, your basic white nationalism, outright fascism, and etc.

This all should give us a renewed sense of urgency, as well as purpose. If we didn’t believe it before, we have to believe now we are engaged in a political struggle for the future – our right to exist in a more just, safe, peaceful, democratic world. January 6th and the reactions and aftermath of it should drive home to you that the stakes are very much real. That we need to work even harder to organize and mobilize the people of this country to enact change for the better.

Moreover, as things will likely get worse before they get better, we need to be prepared for that. While we should never seek out violence, we need to be prepared if violence seeks us out – as it has been apt to do so far. Much has been said about the police response to the insurrection on the 6th. The bungled response appears to have not been due to any one factor, but that none of them bode well in sum. Police collusion and sympathy, a lack of taking the threat seriously, and a lack of the necessary skills or competence when it actually wants to deal with the far-right threat means that we cannot depend on law enforcement to protect us as it is currently structured.

Again – and I cannot stress this enough – this does not mean we should seek out violence. If anyone has fantasies about a Second Civil War, take it from someone who has spent their entire adult life watching still-ongoing civil wars in Syria, Libya, Yemen, and other places: you don’t fucking want that. Period. Full stop. But if anything has been made clear by the rise in right wing terrorism in the last decade, is a reality that we need to watch out for ourselves as we try to move forward. Simply put we can’t make a better world if we don’t live to see it through.

Its ok to be scared. Let yourself be scared for a bit if you feel the need. My Mom always has said you have to let yourself be sad or upset for a while before you can be not upset. But don’t despair. Don’t give in to hopelessness. Nothing is set in stone. Time is not a flat circle, despite what many might tell you. We can make a better world, but we need to be clear headed about the challenges we are going to face going forward in doing that, and we need to be ready for them. So, suit up for the long-haul kiddos. I’ll be here with you, contributing in my own way, going on about war and foreign policy and my usual hobby horses. I don’t plan on going anywhere and neither should you. If we have that resolve, that in itself is a starting victory.

#War Takes #War Takes essay #essay #January 6th #January 6th 2021 #january 6th insurrection #Donald Trump #socialism #leftism #democratic socialism #far-right #fascism #terrorism #domestic terrorism #insurrection #qanon conspiracy #anti fascism

[hyunsuks-beanie]

Someone Like You

Pairing: Hyunjin × gn. reader

Genre: Fluff/Angst

Content Warnings: Jealousy; possessiveness; insecurity; potential hints towards reader being bisexual, but nothing stated explicitly

Part of: Mellow's You've Got A Letter Event 

Mellow speaks: Happy pride🏳️‍🌈 to the anon d requested this!! Thank you for the lovely request, but I just wanna let you know that I decided to keep things not too explicit, to make the reading relatable for all my readers. Hope you don't mind haha, especially since June is the month of celebrating equality among everyone!

Tagging: @sweethyuka @yedammi @enhacolor @yunhorights @axartia @yogurteume 

Hey Y/N? 

I know you're probably confused about finding a note sticking out from under your pillow, right? But uhmm........I just wanted to ask you if you're still up for our paintball date later? I mean, you can totally tell me if you don't want to, or if there's something else you'd rather be doing, or even someone else you'd rather be doing that with. 

Ugh, this is going nowhere. But now I don't have time to restart this letter, because I need to be at the pre-recording session in 30 minutes. And I'm sure you're even more confused by now, so I guess I'm just gonna come clean. When you came to the music show to support us, I saw you talking to a few of the makeup artists. You looked so adorable smiling like that and it really seemed like you were enjoying getting to know someone new.

It's been a while since you got to do that, isn't it? You've just been so busy, and at first, it made me smile seeing you spending time with someone that's not me, and I was happy because I'm not able to always give you as much time as I'd like to. But then, that smile slowly started to fade when I realized you were spending a bit too much time with them. It soon got annoying, and I wanted you to be done and come over to me already. It started to get on my nerves and I found myself wanting to pull you away from them and just hug you tight. 

You guessed it right, I was just being a jealous idiot. But that uncalled for, and I know you're definitely not in the wrong for trying to befriend them. It's just.....we both know you and I are so different from each other. You're literally a ball of sunshine and all I am is a shy, dorky, lanky guy. I sometimes feel I'm holding you back from living life, always wanting to stay indoors and not being too quiet half the time.

And even when I try to be more open to new things and plan dates like the one today, I end up being nervous that I won't be able to make things fun for you and things just spiral downwards. So when I saw you finally find someone who is as into "late-night drives with the windows down" as you are, I guess I just got a little possessive and insecure. I almost did reach out to grab you by the arm and pull you to myself, but in the end, I couldn't bring myself to. 

Why? Because in that moment, I felt guilty. Guilty for not being good enough, and guilty for still having the audacity to think this way. I know it's my fault that I was jealous, and after having stayed awake last night thinking about the way I acted, I also know that you deserve to be free to meet and spend time with people who aren't me, or even like me. And that needs to be the case whether it's you befriending a guy, or a girl, or someone else. 

I'm sorry for feeling this way, baby. I'm not the best with words, but right now, all I'm hoping for is that you realize that I do care. 

I love you, and I'm sorry.

Hyunjin 

#hyunjin #hyunjin fluff #hyunjin angst #stray kids fluff #stray kids angst #bang chan #bang chan fluff #bang chan angst #felix #felix angst #felix fluff #lee know #lee know angst #lee know fluff

[xdomi-nationx-old]

I Don’t Know About You - Grace & Max (Part 3)

Who: Max and Grace ( @gracevandixn )

When: September 28th - September 30th

Where: Los Angeles, CA and surrounding areas

Description: After growing closer via text, Max shows up in LA to see Grace unannounced. The two come to realize that feelings were present on both sides after spending time together and growing even closer.

Triggers: Mentions of type 1 diabetes

Disclaimer: I did my best to be accurate based on what i was able to find through google (i know it’s not always correct) and what Max himself has spoken about in interviews and in his book! He’s very open about his health in real life and it felt wrong to not acknowledge it here. Title based on the song “I Don’t Know About You” by Chris Lane

friday morning

MAX: He woke up the next morning around 7 am, carefully pulling himself out of bed; trying to not disturb her. He ran his fingers through his hair, using the bathroom before gathering the dogs to take them outside for the morning. He started breakfast once they were back inside, knowing he'd need to eat relatively soon and she would probably be hungry too. GRACE: She didn't even feel him get off and out of bed, she'd been that tired. An emotion filled past couple of days with very spotty sleeping had left her completely knocked, and even though getting to talk to Max about them and what they were and what this meant going on, she still needed this rest probably more than she knew it. Waking up without him next to her had her frowning "Max?" She mumbled again, but this time, upon not feeling him further away, she bolted up. The worst images of him sweating beads the day before came back into her mind "Max!?" She almost fell off the bed all tangled in her sheets. She walked quickly to the bathroom and he wasn't there. "Max?!" Had he gone to get something for breakfast and fallen down, was he okay, where was- "Ma- Hey" She said, letting a loud sigh of relief out of her chest "Hi..." Yeap, it was official, she needed to calm the hell down. MAX: He couldn't help but laugh when she appeared in the kitchen, trying to not be obvious about it. "Yeah, hi" he said softly  "sleep okay?" He asked after a moment, setting her coffee over on the table; having made it the same way she did the day before "you seem a little....frazzled this morning" GRACE: She only now realized that she hadn't even brushed her teeth, or her hair, and probably looked like a god damned mess, but her brain had shown her the worst possible outcome and that kinda went over everything else. Running a hand through her hair and rubbing her eyes, she let out a nervous chuckle "Hi... Yes" She walked over to where he was and took the coffee cup, taking a short sip before putting it down and getting on her toes to wrap her arms around his shoulders "Mhm, I woke up and chose worry today, sue me" She kissed his cheek "Next time, please leave a note. 'Went out to walk the dogs. Not in a coma' and I'll be okay" She joked with him. MAX: He shook his head at that, unable to contain a laugh this time "you worry too much" he teased, pressing a kiss to her lips before taking a bite of his breakfast "but alright if that'll make you feel better, I can do it." He said softly, brushing her hair back GRACE: "I know, I always do... I'll start worrying less at some point, when I get used to the idea that not all nights are like the past two nights, I promise" She said with a little sigh, humming happily into the kiss, smiling as he pulled her hair back and she opened her eyes again "Thank you.... For that and for breakfast" She kissed him quickly again before going back to her coffee MAX: "You'll mellow out when you realize I'm not really that close to death." He teased, before shrugging slightly "the fact you haven't run for the hills yet, you deserve that little bit of reassurance if you need it" he said softly "as for breakfast, I needed to eat anyway, would have been rude to not make food for you too." GRACE: Grabbing some of the breakfast he'd laid on the table for them, she nodded as she leaned back against the counter instead of sitting down on a chair "Exactly... It'll happen, I'll eventually calm down" Smiling when he mentioned her leaving, she shook her head, taking another sip of her coffee "I could never, kid, who'd worry for you if I didn't?" She finished with a little wink "Mhm, yeah, and since I've gotten quite used to kissing you whenever I like, I really need to learn my glutens from my non glutens, because I really don't wanna semi-almost-kill you again" MAX: "I appreciate that you don't actively want to make me violently ill" he teased, "i wasn't going to die, even if it felt like I was" he added with a laugh "Basically anything with wheat, rye and/or barley is out. All have gluten, all will make me sick and do more damage to my body" GRACE: "Of course, kid, I got you" She laughed and winked at him, twirling around the kitchen and the table with her coffee in hand as she ate "You looked like you weren't having a good time, dead or not, so like... Yeah, no more to that- Wait... Wheat, rye... Barley" She rummaged through her head, which was pretty confused by having woken up all of ten minutes ago "Rice... Rice is fine, right? But I think white rice has a lot of like, sugar and carbs, and stuff, so that's not the best too?" She had hopped onto the counter and was now narrowing her eyes to concentrate as much as she could. MAX: He shook his head at her, rolling his eyes playfully "yes babe. Rice is fine. White isn't the best, no, but brown rice is alright. Thats a staple for me, actually." He said softly, watching her climb on the counter "what exactly are you doing" GRACE: Kneeling on the counter, she'd wanted to check if she had some kind of rice cracker on the top of the shelving she never really was tall enough to reach, but then again, she never ate rice crackers so it could be a good place for them to be. She snooped around and by the time he asked what the hell she was doing, she turned around and sat on the surface "Nothing... Just looking... Okay so rice... Brown rice" She hummed, her legs swinging, almost touching the ground "Is that about it?" MAX: "Honey, you can relax you know?" He said softly, resting his hands on the counter on either side of her. "I just can't have things like regular pastas or breads or baked goods. I can have those things in the gluten-free alternatives. As long as they're not processed or cooked where there's gluten present" he explained "and no beer either" he added kissing her cheek. "I'll show you what to check for on labels if you want" he said quietly, looking at her GRACE: Grace finished her coffee and let the cup down beside her just as he came to frame her into the counter top. She wrapped her arms around his neck "I know, I know I can relax and that you know what you're doing and stuff, but I also like... Have no idea what I'm doing, I never got into the gluten free fad and never even paid attention to that sort of thing, and now I'm faced with either understanding something I ignored forever or harm someone I really care for, so I wanna make sure I know" She let out all the rant in a sort of melody "Please... I know it's like a little wheat thing crossed over, but it's also like, really popular now to eat gluten free just because you don't want it? Not because you really can't eat it? So what if I buy gluten free bread from a bakery and it happens again and you're sick for five days... Okay two, but whatever" MAX: "Then that would suck"  he said, pretty bluntly. "But that's just the nature of it babe, there's always going to be a risk in places like restaurants and bakeries unless they're strictly gluten free- and thats not always easy to find." He said softly, pressing a kiss to her cheek "i really don't run into too many issues now though, honestly. So you really don't need to worry about it GRACE: Grace felt calmer when he kissed her cheek, her arms hanging from his neck a bit more relaxed now "Fine... I'm sorry I was a bit... Intense this morning" She said with a little smile, leaning over to press a peck on his lips "Hi. Good morning" MAX: He shrugged at that, kissing her back gently "just not used to that, is all. Having someone care that much and be concerned, i mean. Aside from my parents and my sisters at least, and they've mellowed out now." he said with a laugh,  keeping his arms wrapped around her. GRACE: Grace rolled her eyes a little and smiled "I know, I'll try to calm down" she moved her hands to frame his face "i'll always care this much though... I'll try to make it less intensely, but I'll always care this much, kid" MAX: "If you never do, that's okay" he said with a shrug "but I hope for your sake you do, this isn't your stress to carry" GRACE: She kissed his lips with his face in her hands, nudging his nose with hers "I'll get better, promise" She kissed him again "So, what are we doing today? Feeling better? Wanna go for a walk?" MAX: "We can go for a walk this morning, flight isn't until this afternoon. I'll get back just in time to go to practice" he said with a laugh,rubbing her back gently. GRACE: Grace smiled at the idea of the plan, finally leaving the house not to go get groceries "Cool, i like that. We could go to the beach" MAX: "Beach doesn't sound bad" he agreed, pressing a kiss to her cheek "we can go whenever you're ready, I'm gonna pack up my shit now so I'm ready to leave." He added, running his fingers through his hair GRACE: His hands in her hair made Grace smile, closing her eyes and pressing her nose to his for a second, just enjoying the moment "Mhm... Beach jt is. Go pack, I'll figure out flights for tonight or tomorrow" MAX: "we will figure out a flight for you" he said simply, kissing her cheek again "and I'm paying for it. You took care of me pretty much the whole time i was here, so I'm gonna take care of that. No ifs, ands or buts." He said seriously, poking her nose gently GRACE: The poke on her nose made her giggle, and she bit her lower lip for a second "Okay, I won't argue with that" She shrugged a little and kissed him "Come on, go pack, kid" MAX: "What if I don't want to?" He shot back playfully, pulling her in a bit closer and resting his head on hers. He held her there for a few moments before sighing softly and letting go "I suppose I do actually have to do that though." GRACE: Grace's eyebrows went up at the defiance, pursing her lips "Oh, you don't?" She let out a little giggle "Well, remember what I mentioned about being really persuasive?" She asked just when he started letting go "Shut up" her arms instantly tightening around his shoulders, hands carefully hanging down his back, and pushing her lips on his for a kiss MAX: "Mm. Am I gonna see your persuasion in action?" He asked with a smirk, humming softly when she kissed him again, feeling her arms tighten around him GRACE: Grace grinned into the kiss as he spoke "Mhm, I don't know" Her hands moving to frame his face for a moment, then moving her hands to let her lips trace a trail from his lips to his cheeks and down his neck, leaving dainty little kisses all over his skin "Can you please go pack, Maxie?" MAX: He bit his lip when she started kissing down his neck, breathing in sharply. "Mhm. Yeah. Pack." He mumbled softly, though in reality that was the last thing on his mind. GRACE: Grace giggled quietly, paying extra attention to where she'd been kissing when he pulled in a tight breath "Please" She hummed, kissing up towards his ear and repeating the same word in a whisper next to it "Please, go pack, Maxie" She continued kissing and returned her trail from his ear, down his cheek bone and back to his lips. MAX: He pulled back only slightly when she whispered in his ear, drawing in another sharp breath. He was convinced she was actually trying to kill him now, biting his lip even harder. "Right. Okay. I- yeah. I'm gonna go do. That." He mumbled, trying to pull himself out of her arms. GRACE: She had her lips on his cheek again when he started talking, and all she could do was sport a triumphant smile as he slowly started to back away. She dropped her hands next to him and kissed his cheeks "Thank you" She grinned when he took a step back "See? Very persuasive" MAX: "No, I just decided it needed to get done. Nothing to do with you" he said seriously, walking out of the kitchen and hoping his shorts weren't showing too much off after her antics. GRACE: Grace bit on her lower lip as he walked away, running a hand through her hair, and once Max was out of range, letting out a loud huff, closing her legs and cooling herself off a little, the biggest smile plastered on her lips, feeling like a teenager having her first kiss all over again. MAX: He closed the door to the guest bedroom, running his fingers through his hair with a groan; opting to hop in the shower first. If she asked, he'd just tell her it was part of his routine, she'd believe it right? He couldn't very well tell her he had to get in the shower for other reasons, even if it was all her fault. The longer he thought about it, the more he decided the packing could wait until more pressing matters were addressed. GRACE: Grace stayed in the kitchen, a small hope that he'd turn around on his heels and come pick her up and kiss her silly slowly extinguished by the passing of the time and the closing of the door. So she stayed there for a few extra seconds and then, the smile still ever present, picked up after their breakfast, threw everything in the washing machine and went upstairs to start her own packing process. She had no idea when they'd be able to fly, so she managed to throw a few jeans, shirts and rompers into a suitcase, skincare and whatnot. She wasn't even halfway done when she got distracted by Googling on her iPad if dogs needed passports and chips, all the things she needed to do today if any shops were open, and pick a formal name for her dog. MAX: He wasn't in the shower too terribly long, but stepping back out into the bedroom he felt a lot better; pulling on another pair of shorts and tugging a tshirt over his head before gathering up all of his things and throwing them back in his bag. He grabbed his backpack next, taking inventory to make sure he wasn't forgetting any of his supplies, and restocking it with the juice boxes she'd bought him the day before. He did his best to clean up the bedroom and bathroom, not wanting to leave a terrible mess for her to deal with before grabbing both of his bags and heading back down the hallway. GRACE: She also took a short shower, just in case she had to fly out later tonight, and blew her hair out a little with her dyson, styling up some pretty curls and doing the minimal skincare and make up she did for everyday things. Once she was dressed in a white tee and some jeans with a pair of Chucks, she made her way back downstairs, whistling "Baby" She called out, hearing the sound of his paws racing from the guest bedroom "Hi baby! We gotta go get your papers for your flight.. I know you don't like the vet, but if you wanna keep hanging out with your best buddy over there, you gotta" She'd knelt down and was talking to the dog in a baby voice, kissing his head. MAX: He was leaning against the kitchen counter when she came back down, scrolling through his phone and sipping on a glass of water; Orion laying at his feet "god, took you long enough" he teased, giving her a grin. "I cleaned up that bedroom as best I could, I promise. I'll empty the trash in there before we leave too." GRACE: She'd not even seen him when she came down, and her comment made her roll her eyes "Excuse me, all of this doesn't happen on its own" She rounded her face and hair with her hands "Don't worry, kid, thank you though, I'll figure it out. You ready?" MAX: "No, I'll get it." He said softly "the trash can in there is full because of me" he added, heading down the hallway to grab the garbage from the guest room. He went outside to toss it before coming back in and grabbing his bag; tossing his backpack over his shoulder. "Ready when you are." He said softly, stealing a quick kiss from her GRACE: She stood for a moment as he went back to the room and came back to toss the garbage outside. She'd have to give the room a good clean, and especially pay attention to all his kitchen stuff to put them away in a separate place, but she'd do that later. Grinning as he kissed her, she nodded and crossed her bum bag over her chest, clipping the leash on the dog and walking outside to the car. Once everyone was in, she pulled out and headed towards the coast, trying to find a less populated beach than Santa Monica "I need a real like, full name for the dog" She said with a laugh, looking sideways at Max MAX: "Yeah, probably a good idea huh?" He teased, reaching for her hand once they'd gotten in the car. "Have you thought of anything yet?" He asked, sipping his water again GRACE: She looked down at her hand in his and felt her heart beating a little faster, her fingers quickly intertwining with his as she kept them other one on the wheel. "Not at all.. I don't know, he looks like so many things" She looked back through the side of her mirror, the aussie pup curled up against Orion. MAX: "You're gonna just keep calling him Baby forever, aren't you?" He teased gently, kissing the back of her hand. Both of the dogs seemed to be napping in the back seat, with absolutely no issues being together. GRACE: She gave his hand a squeeze and kept her eyes on the road "He'll always be my baby, but I feel like he should have a name, like, a real name, that when I call out only he'll come back and not 120 other dogs who also get called baby" She gazed back again with a smile "I think he's completely obsessed with his new best bud" MAX: "They both seem to have taken to each other, huh?" He said with a laugh, sipping his water and leaning back in his seat slightly "they really have gotten along well, haven't they?" He added, looking over at her GRACE: "What can I say, us Van Diens are kinda irresistible" She said with an overly exaggerated shrug and a quick wink at him, bringing their hands up to her thighs and letting them rest there "But I'm so glad he wasn't too on him, maybe he'll learn a thing or two from Orion" MAX: "Can't say I disagree" he said with a shrug,humming softly when she mentioned the puppy learning something from Orion "I mean, maybe. Orion is the best boy on earth, after all" He teased, glancing back at the dogs again. GRACE: "I know you can't" As they got closer to a further away beach, Grace let go of his hand, leaving it on her thigh, and found a spot to park the car "Alright, here we are, beach time!" She clapped her hands excitedly, getting out of the car and clipping the leash on the dog, getting him out and once Max and Orion were ready, making their way down the the coast. MAX: "Beach time!" He mocked playfully, tossing his backpack over his shoulder and getting Orion's leash on, the dog immediately taking his place on his left side. "I forgot what being in the sun was like" He joked, looking over at her. GRACE: She laughed at his joke "Mhm, where were you before Chicago? I feel like it must suck not knowing where you're gonna be like, two weeks from now and stuff, you know? You can't settle down" MAX: "Immediately before Chicago? I was home in Toronto for the summer" he said with a shrug "but I was playing in Carolina from the end of March until the middle of May. I was in Columbus before that though, and I kinda had a feeling I'd get moved by the time the trade deadline came around." He added, watching both of the dogs "I had no idea where I was heading but I just had a feeling I wouldn't finish the season in Ohio." GRACE: "No, like, playing for the season, yeah" She said with a nod, hearing him explain. Once they'd gotten to the shore, Grace bent down to kick her shoes and take her socks off, tying the laces up and throwing the over one shoulder "Trade deadline, that's like, a limit in the year to get moved? During the season?" MAX: "Yeah, teams aren't allowed to trade after a certain day until the off-season rolls around again." He explained "last year it was at the end of March, this year I think they said it's March 3rd" he added, running his fingers through his hair GRACE: Tied to his leash, the pup ran ahead of them as they started walking, splashing with the water and running around in the sand "Oh... That's interesting" She said, understanding nothing of what he said except the date "Do you think you're gonna stay in Chicago? Like... Do you have a way of knowing?" MAX: "Do I think I will? Probably not" he said honestly "I'd like to, I like it there so far. but this team is trying to rebuild, get younger you know? I knew when I signed there, that there was a really good chance I'll get flipped at the deadline. Doesn't necessarily mean it'll happen but I'm prepared for that." GRACE: Grace pouted at the way he spoke about the team, pursing her lips after and reaching over to hold his hand "I'm sorry... I don't know if you like the team a lot, like... But you- I don't know, I don't know how it works and I bet you're used to that, like, getting moved around" She shrugged, stumbling over her words as usual "Where would you wanna go?" MAX: "I asked to go there you know? Coach Luke is the head coach there now, he was an assistant coach when I was in Montréal. I knew what I was walking into" he said softly, shrugging a bit "getting traded isn't fun, but you adapt you know?" He mentioned before shrugging again "I dunno. Toronto would be cool, since that's where my dad played and one of my best friends is there. but....thats a long way away from you" GRACE: "You can ask?" Grace looked confused, nodding once he explained "I bet it's not fun... It's like... We get to work like months away from home, but you don't get moved from project to project, and you always come home afterwards" She tried to relate, but felt like she fell short. He definitely had it harder "Yeah? I mean, must be nice being next to family" She said, rolling her eyes a little when he mentioned her, taking a step closer to him and wrapping her hand around his bicep, kissing over it lightly "There's always flying" MAX: "I mean, yeah? If you're a free agent you can, doesn't mean it will happen but you can have a preference and your agent can try and work something out"  he said, shrugging again "it'd be nice to be home but honestly my dad lives in New York with my stepmom now. My sister's and my mom still live near Toronto." He added, smiling a little when she said there was always flying "I know,but still. It's not a whole lot longer flight than Chicago but. . .it's still further" GRACE: "Oh, so you like, can sorta pick, that's really cool" She nodded to his explanation. "Right, yeah... And New York? I lived there for a while and loved it so much.. It's kinda mad for a city, and way too cold in the winter, But it's so nice" She remembered the memories fondly "Hey, don't worry about me for now... I'll- We'll make it work" MAX: "Honey, it's only cold to you because you grew up on the west coast" he said with a laugh "I know. and that's something that probably won't happen anyway" he added, shrugging again as they walked along the beach. GRACE: Grace laughed and shook her head "LA baby, born and raised, I don't even know what the seasons mean, it's all spring and summer here" She spoke between laughs "Won't happen? Like... Nee York? Why? I mean- You don't have to tell me, sorry" She blurted out and shrugged, swinging their hands as they walked MAX: "I meant getting traded to Toronto," he said with a laugh "its probably a long shot, is what I meant. So we don't have to worry about you having to come even farther to see me, that's all" GRACE: Grace grinned at the thought of him taking her into account. It was something very sweet of him, and something that she'd never felt when meeting someone, seeing as most people in the business she was in were in the LA or New York area. "Again, there's always flying, kid" She added with a shrug "So wherever you're playing, as long as I'm not filming, I'll be there" MAX: He smiled a little at that, pressing a kiss to her temple "You're right, obviously. We'll figure it out whatever happens I guess?" He said softly, keeping her close to him GRACE: "As usual" She added after he pointed it out, giving his hand a little squeeze and kissking his bicep again "I'm actually really excited to go to Chicago... I don't know why, but I really wanna go now" MAX: "Are you really?" He said with a laugh, humming softly when she kissed his arm "I'm excited for you to come there, not quite ready to let you go yet" he teased, but it was the truth. "Maybe sometime this week we can get you on the ice too" GRACE: "Yeah! I can't remember the last time I went to Chicago for like, not a convention or work and stuff, so it'll be fun to spend the morning walking around with this one to find cute coffee shops and book stores and parks... I know he's gonna be spending his time with you-" She signaled with her face towards Orion "But I could take him with us if you're ever busy" Her eyes flew wide open when he mentioned going on the ice "What? I... Uhm.. I don't... Do you- Are you sure? Not with anyone around, like, your friends, right?" MAX: "Maybe you can take him with you when I'm at practice?" He suggested, unable to help but laugh at her face "if you don't want to, I'm not going to force you. But I think it'll be fun, and we can go when the other guys aren't around if that's more comfortable for you." GRACE: "Yeah, of course! I think Baby would enjoy that very much, wouldn't you, boy?" She whistled at the dog who looked back, only to ignore them and keep moving a second afterwards. He laughed at her face and she elbowed him in the stomach, careful with his two little devices, but still "Don't laugh, I don't wanna make an idiot out of myself in front of like, your friends and the people you work with" MAX: "Guess he's too busy to listen to you" he teased, laughing when she elbowed him "you won't make an idiot of yourself, and they wouldn't give a shit anyway" he reasoned, kissing her temple "but like I said, we can go when they're not around." GRACE: "He's either too busy or too uninterested, but I've kinda given up" She joked, rolling her eyes at his comments "Still, I'm probably gonna fall more than once and I'd like to do that in the privacy on my own... Place.. Ice thing.. Without people watching" MAX: "Then we'll go when they're not around" he said with a shrug, pressing a kiss to her cheek. "The only one who will see you bust your ass, is me. Okay?" He teased, nudging her gently GRACE: "Thank you very much" She rolled her eyes at him, smiling while he kissed her cheek, turning around to kiss his as she rose on her toes for a moment "Hey, you better be there to catch me, or I'm gonna be real mad" MAX: "I'm not taking the chance of you pulling me down with you!" He teased, stopping to wrap his arm around her and pull her in close "I won't let you get hurt, I promise." He said softly, gently stroking her cheek and giving her a kiss. GRACE: Grace's eyes flew wide, a laugh coming out of her chest as he brought her in close, her free hand went around his shoulder "Max Domi, take that back!" She bit on her lower lip, kissing him back sweetly "You better not" MAX: "What are you gonna do if I don't, huh?" He teased, pulling back with a laugh "I won't. I promise. You'll be perfectly fine" GRACE: "I don't know, maybe I'll realize I'm better off staying here in LA, not freezing my ass of in a hockey arena" She nudged her nose with his and kissed his lips quickly again "Good... I don't think I've ice skated in years... I need to get skates... Shit" MAX: He pouted at that "hey, that's not funny" he said softly, before shaking his head "don't worry about it, we'll get you skates okay?" GRACE: "Me falling on my ass isn't funny either" She traced his pout with her thumb and then kissed it softly "Mhm, okay... I can probably rent ones over there... And leave them there too, because I'm sure as hell I won't ever use them in LA" MAX: "We'll buy you some" he corrected gently, kissing her back softly before pulling away just a little so they could keep walking. GRACE: Reaching down for his hand when they started walking, Grace furrowed her brow "What am I gonna do with a pair of ice skates in LA?" MAX: "I dunno. You can always leave them at my apartment. But I'd rather buy you your own and know that they're comfortable for you than just have you rent something old and worn" he said softly, holding her hand in is as they continued down the beach GRACE: She shrugged her shoulders. In the end, if she liked him as much as she did, and Grace really did like him, investing in a pair of skates now would mean that every time she visited or he did, they could do something related to ice, which... Would be fitting and fun for him, and she'd learn. "Alright, I guess you've got a point, so we're going ice skate shopping" MAX: "We could get you some pretty little figure skates" he suggested, nuzzling at her gently. "But if you don't wanna do it, you really don't have to. You know that right?" GRACE: Grace looked at him and shook her head "The white ones? Can they be like... Blue or something? But those are boring, I saw the ones you were wearing the other day, those looked cooler" She said, almost sounding like a child "I know... I know, but I wanna share something with you... Like, this is your life, you've been doing this forever, and if this means I'm gonna be sharing something and learning something with you, then I'm in" MAX: He couldn't help but laugh at that "Alright, alright. I'll get you some like mine then" he said softly, smiling a little when she said she wanted to share something with him "it is, but I know it's not for everyone so if you didn't want to, I'd understand. Maybe you can teach me something you really enjoy too, and then we'll be even" GRACE: She grinned up at him when he agreed, beaming like a kid who got the treat she wanted "Yay!" Shrugging her shoulders when he spoke, Grace agreed "I know.. And like, I'm not gonna go wild like you and I'm definitely not gonna like be super into it, but if we go somewhere and you wanna go skate, I don't wanna have to sit on the side and wave like an idiot, you know? And I can totally teach you, like, to play Valo or something" MAX: "If you're sure" he said softly, shrugging a bit. He smiled when she mentioned teaching him games "I'm an amateur gamer, maybe learning from a pro would do me good" he said with a laugh, nudging her gently as they walked along; Orion walking in front of him after a moment, causing them to stop abruptly. GRACE: She nodded her head, shrugging "Yeah, of course I can! You guys play like... Madden but like, hockey version, right? Or is it one of those 'I play hockey all day, I don't wanna bring-'" Grace stopped on her tracks as the dog stopped in front of Max, making her look at him. Baby tugged on his leash, and Grace reeled him back him "You okay, Maxie?" MAX: "We play Madden, we play Call of Duty. Mario kart. Whole bunch of things" he said softly, swinging his backpack off his shoulder and pulling his monitor out. "I'm fine" he replied as he went about testing himself, licking his finger. He shrugged at the number that popped up, grabbing a juice box and zipping the bag up again "he caught that one quick, I didn't even feel it yet" he said with a laugh, sipping at the juice. GRACE: This felt a lot more... Subdued. And calmer than before. He got the thing out of the bag, did the thing, it all was very... Calm, would be the one thing she'd pick out of this, when in previous situations she'd been in, well, the one before, it was definitely more of a whirlwind. While the machine ran, and Max complimented Orion, Grace went down on her knees and pet the lab gently "Such a good boy, thank you" She kissed his head and got back up "Well, that was a much nicer experience than yesterday afternoon" She added with a laugh MAX: "Yeah typically it's a lot nicer for him to just cut me off than jump on me and bark when I'm dead asleep" he teased, finishing the juice box and grabbing a protein bar; if they were going to keep walking and he was on the lower side- it'd be best to have a little something else along with the juice. GRACE: Watching him grab the granola bar, she only then recognized that they'd been walking for a lot longer than she thought "Yeah, trust me, I feel the exact same way" She laughed a little bit, stopping a little and looking at him "I don't- What time's your flight? Should we start going back? If we have to go home and pick up stuff and then go to LAX" MAX: "I think we're okay for a little longer" He said with a shrug "I threw my bag in the back so we wouldn't have to go back, figured thats easier" he added, grabbing her hand again. GRACE: Grace smiled "Okay" She said with a nod, now catching up with him and going back to wrapping her arm around him and walking by his side "Smart boy, that's a good idea... We still have to figure out when we're gonna get there" MAX: "I'll look at flights when you're driving back, we'll find something for you" he said simply, kissing her temple gently "we'll have to start heading back soon though, as much as I don't want to." GRACE: "Alright" She quipped back, looking ahead at Baby running around like crazy, and Orion walking by Max "I really hope he picks up after Orion this week" She joked, leaning further in on his side and nodding "Yeah, I know, I'm upset too... And you said when the season starts, this just gets crazier, right?" MAX: "Right. It's a busy schedule, that's why I wanted to get out here to see you now....because I wasn't sure when I'd get another chance" he said softly, squeezing her hand gently in his "but there will be breaks, we can figure stuff out" GRACE: Grace smiled when he mentioned coming up to see her "You know, I forget we like, just met" She said with a little laugh, looking down at their feet for a moment before going back up to look at him "I don't know, I feel like we've been friends forever and that I've known you for a really long time, and... I don't know, it probably sounds stupid, but like, I never expected to like... Be this into- like, like you this much" She put it all out there. He was leaving in a few hours, and she was going after him. If that didn't mean that she liked him that much, it really shouldn't be any surprise to him "We'll figure this out, kid" MAX: "Yeah, me too. But sometimes when you know, you know I guess?" He said with a shrug, running his fingers through his hair. "I'm pretty happy about how things are going so far though" GRACE: When you know, you know had been a thought that'd been running through Grace's mind for a while, and when he said it, it kinda made sense "Yeah, I guess so... And I'm really happy too" She came up on her toes to kiss his cheek with a giggle, coming down with a sigh and checking her watch "We should-" She stopped and pulled his hand, turning around on her feet "It'll take us a while to get back to the car- Baby, come on!" She whistled at the dog, and for once he obeyed, dashing like a bullet on the direction they were now going "Oh God, he's insane" MAX: "Yeah, you're probably right" he said softly, laughing when the puppy took off running "good god he's full of energy" he joked, sticking close to her as they started to head back. He was not looking forward to leaving, at all, but he didn't have much choice and at least this time- she'd be following after him. GRACE: Grace laughed, shaking her head "Maybe I'll name him Dash, after the kid from the Incredibles" She got the idea and chuckled. The mood turned a bit upset when they turned back. Their three day little holiday was over and Grace knew how upset he was, because it was kinda the same way she felt "Okay, when does the season start? Like... For reals, not these fake games?" MAX: "It'd be fitting" he said with a laugh, kissing her cheek gently "regular season starts October 12th for us." He said softly "we're starting on the road. Colorado the 12th, Las Vegas on the 13th and San Jose on the 15th" GRACE: Nodding her haed, she listened to him list off the dates, until she heard the last one "Aww, that's my birthday! You're gonna be busy... Okay, then you go back to Chicago?" She asked as they walked, swinging their hands gently. MAX: "If you can get to San Jose, I can at least take you out for lunch" he said softly,pulling her in a little closer "but yeah, then we go back to Chicago. We won't have another game until our home opener on the 21st, but I'll have practice most days." GRACE: Grace smiled at him "I appreciate the offer, kiddo" She said with a big smile up at him "I'll probably spend the day with family, but I'll try to make it before and after, like, maybe the first game I could be there... And home opener is like, the first game like... In Chicago, right?" MAX: "Maybe I can come see you the day before then" he said softly, kissing her cheek gently "yeah, home opener is the first game in Chicago babe. We'll have home games for about a week I think." GRACE: "You focus on your hockey and making the team and all that stuff that's important, working out and being healthy and stuff, okay?" She said, shaking her head "As long as I'm not working, I'll try and like... Figure out flights and visits and stuff, but I really want you to do well" She was sounding like a mom right now, but really, all she wanted for him was to succeed so the team would want him to stick there and he could get some kind of stability "Okay, then maybe I can do those games" MAX: "Yeah but, you're also important. And if I'm going to be busy on your birthday, the least I can do is figure out a way to do something with you on another day around that time" he said softly "and I hate that you're going to have to travel so much, that's not fair to you." GRACE: She leaned on his chest when he mentioned her being important, biting on her lower lip and nodding "Yeah, I know... I know, and I really appreciate that and if it can happen, I'll be the happiest... Maybe I can go where you'll be" She shuffled that in her mind, laughing when he brought up having to travel that much "Who knows, maybe I am cut out for the groupie life... What sucks though is that my agent isn't gonna be paying for all of them, but I'm gonna be frequent flyer miles rich, baby" She joked, squeezing his hand a little bit "I'm more than used to flying, and soon enough Baby will be too... And when the season is done, you can like, come do nothing wherever I'm working" MAX: "Honey if you're coming just to see me, I'll be paying for your flights" he said with a laugh, squeezing her hand back gently and kissing behind her ear "yeah? That sounds like a good way to spend my summer" he acknowledged, finally making it back to the car with her and getting Orion in the back seat. GRACE: She laughed and shook her head when he mentioned paying for her flights "Halfsies, I'm not letting you pay for all my flights... I can pay for my own" She said with a shrug as they walked their way back to the car "Mhm, I mean, again, you have your very own un-glutened kitchen set, and you've proven that you can keep me fed, so why wouldn't I keep you around?" She joked, wiping the sand off her feet and slipping her shoes back on after getting Baby in the car, turning it on and heading over to LAX. MAX: "We'll talk about it" he said simply, rolling his eyes at her playfully and giving her a gentle shove. "I knew you only kept me for the food." He said, shaking his head with a grin before getting back in the car; both dogs curled up together in the back seat. GRACE: Laughing when he spoke, Grace nodded "Ah yes, I completely outed myself... I'll probably also keep you around to reach for things in high shelves, move large boxes and open really tight jars" She joked, placing a hand over his thigh as she drove. She caught a sight of the dogs in the back and pouted "I think that'll be the hardest goodbye" MAX: "Uh huh, I see how it is now." He said with an eyeroll, resting his hand over hers. "Mm. I dunno, I still think ours will be harder, but I think they'll struggle too" he said softly, leaning back against the seat as they drove toward the airport. GRACE: He placed her hand over hers, and she took it and placed it over her thigh when she had to put both hands on the wheel, turning to him and smiling "Yeap, only here to serve a purpose, Domi" She joked "Well yeah, but like, I know I'm seeing you soon because I'm flying over... Baby probably thinks he'll never see his best bud ever again!" She said with a childish voice and a pout "But yes, I don't like the idea of driving you to the airport, this is gonna suck every time" MAX: "I'm glad I can be used for more than just a warm body" he joked, before humming softly "yeah that's true, they have no concept of when they'll see each other again." He said softly, shifting a bit "unfortunately that's just how it's gonna have to be, as much as it sucks" he added, kissing the back of her hand. GRACE: "Mhm, you're more than just a pretty face and great arms, kid" She looked at him through the side of her eyes and winked, chuckling afterwards "Yeah, that's the sad bit... But it'll be fun when they see each other again... Well, maybe just for Baby, I think Orion will just go Ugh not this one again" He kissed her hand and she brought his to kiss it too "I know... Can't you just get an office job? Nine to five? A finance bro?" She joked. MAX: "Not much though." He said simply, shrugging. He laughed when she mentioned the dogs again "no I think he'll be happy to see him. I don't let him around other dogs very often, because if he were to get attacked or something it could ruin his training. I wasn't worried about that with your puppy. . .and I don't worry about it with my sisters dog either." He said softly, rolling his eyes at the mention of a 9 to 5. "Babe, I'd lose my mind. . .the little bit I have left." GRACE: She grinned "So much more" She spoke her words between kisses to the back of his hand, before putting it down on her thigh again "I know, I always see like, service dogs and help dogs around and their people asking to not let their dogs near because it could be dangerous, and I was... Like a little worried, because like, he's a pup, he has no idea what's going on, but he really behaved and took well to him" She shrugged her shoulders and smiled "Yeah, me too, I'd rather you have fun and fly around the world than have you like, upset in an office" MAX: "I don't know that I agree but" he shrugged, holding her hand on his leg "I was a little nervous too but, it worked out. The worst is the parents with their little 5 year olds and the kid wants to pet him. If I say no, I'm an asshole. But depending on what kind of day I'm having, sometimes I really can't afford having him be distracted. ." He said softly, shrugging again "maybe some day I'll have a desk job, but probably not. That's not how I'm built" he said with a laugh, looking over at her GRACE: "I fully agree with myself, you're so much more than that, kid. You're... I'm not gonna go into it, but like, you're amazing" She said with confidence, shrugging her shoulders at the end. Nodding, she got where he was coming from "Yeah... It's really hard to understand from the outside, but you can't have him be distracted or pick something else up because you could be in danger" She laughed when he brought up the office job "Listen, go wild, play hockey. I play pretend for a camera and build stories in my mind... We're not built to be sitting in an office all day" MAX: "Mhm, if you say so" he said softly, running his fingers through his hair "the really sad part is, if I say no - the kids usually are just like 'okay' the parents are the ones who throw a fit." He said, shaking his head "exactly, we're not office job, 9 to 5 people" GRACE: "You really are, so stop doubting yourself" She gave his hand one last squeeze before putting it down and focusing back on the road "Well yeah, parents are the really rude ones always, like, you never see kids being rude in stores and stuff" She shrugged her shoulders "Okay, but like, if hockey hadn't been an option, what would you have done?" MAX: "Pathetic when kids have more maturity than the adults do" he said with a laugh, shrugging a bit "I dunno, honestly. Maybe music or something? Not that I'm any good at music, but I might have put more effort into learning if I didn't have my heart set on hockey." He explained "what would you have done?" GRACE: She laughed along with him and shook her head "Music?" She asked, nodding her head and passing his phone to him "You wanna do some car DJ, show me what you like?" She said with a big smile "Two of the Stranger Things guys do music and it's so cool, I love that... Me? I always said writer, and I do love writing, but I've slowly really gotten into psychology and like, reading psychology books, so many something like that, or neuroscience... School would've been a bitch, but I really love the human mind" MAX: "Locker room dj is the most underrated skill there is, for the record" he said, taking the phone from her "but yeah, I played guitar a little bit - I haven't played much in years though" he said with a shrug "psychology? That would have been killer in terms of school but I can definitely see that for you I think." GRACE: "Are you usually the designated one?" She said with a big smile on her face, biting her lip at the fact that he played guitar "Really? Must've pulled all the girls with that" She joked, feeling so comfortable and confident around him, she really couldn't believe they'd only just met "Yeah, psychology... I don't know, like, how the brain works and helping people through their issues, it's really interesting" MAX: "Sometimes. It's tricky because you have to have something that everyone likes, and everyone likes different things. Plus you want different stuff for before a game or before a practice and stuff." He said with a laugh, rolling his eyes "I didn't pull the girls, believe me" he responded, nodding when she spoke "it's fascinating for sure, maybe you can do that in the future if it's still something you might have interest in." GRACE: Grace chuckled as he brought up the intricacies of the job description, nodding her head "And what do you usually play? Like... I don't know, I mean, I'd play old rock and dance around in socks and a t-shirt, but I think that's not the vibe" She said with a laugh. "You didn't?!" She teased "And yeah, it's really cool... I don't know if I'd do anything with it, but I definitely love reading about it and knowing more" MAX: "Rock, rap, country. Little bit of everything, we've got a good mix usually" he said with a laugh "it's worth at least looking into yeah? Nothing wrong with expanding your knowledge right?" GRACE: "A little bit of everything, yeah" She spoke over him and nodded with a grin "And yeah, it's definitely super interesting, so who knows... Never say never" The sign of LAX suddenly came into view a little ways away and Grace pouted, sighing and reaching over to hold his hand again. MAX: "I see that pout" he teased, kissing the back of her hand gently. He might have teased her, but he was just as upset about having to leave as she was. "You're gonna come see me, so this is fine. Won't be that long" he said softly GRACE: "What pout" She mumbled, pouting even harder before laughing "I know, I just... Hate that you have to go. The business I'm in kinda puts a lot of miles between you and the people you care for, but eventually you come back to the same place... And I had to go and find someone who lives on a plane for a living to like, huh" She gave him a side eye and pulled into the airport, driving over to where his airline was flying out of. MAX: "I know, how awful is that right?" He teased, leaning over to give her a kiss once she'd parked. "I don't like this either, but we don't really have any other option babe" he said softly, nuzzling at her nose gently GRACE: Grace chuckled and smiled, parking the car "Totally terrible, worst idea ever" She said between short kisses, unbuckling her seatbelt and reaching out to give him a hug "I'll see you soon, okay?" MAX: "Maybe I'll just retire" he deadpanned before laughing "kidding. That was a joke. I can't fathom the thought of that yet." He joked, hugging her back and giving her one more kiss before gathering his bag and Orion out of the car "text me when you get in so I can make sure I'm there to get you yeah?" He said, giving her a wave before heading into the airport with Orion to catch their flight home. GRACE: She laughed "As if you could ever stop, kid" She said, kissing him back and watching him take all his stuff. Watching Orion get off, Baby just looked out the window confused "Yeah, I'll let you know the details. Fly safe, you two" She said, blowing them a kiss and waiting until they were inside the airport to turn around and drive home.

#p: grace van dien #i don't know about you - max & grace #tw: long post

[rattling-the-teacups]

We had the memorial. No fights broke out. There were many conversations that took place that weren't about Tyler, which unfortunately is to be expected when people who haven't seen each other in a long time get together again. It got annoying. My mom insisted on taking a million pictures with me and everyone. I let my displeasure be known. Both sets of my grandparents were there. My grandma on my dad's side loved our picture slideshow and Tyler's sketchbook drawings, some of which she has taken photos of to show one of my younger cousins, who is also trans and draws. I don't know that she was thinking about them both being trans specifically, but my younger cousins liked Tyler a lot and I feel like he would be proud to be a role model for them, especially to live as themselves. My family was annoying, but they were mostly supportive. We didn't get to listen to as much music as we wanted, but I did get quite a bit of time to talk about Tyler to a captive audience until late at night. I was glad to see my friends, although they didn't get to stay until very late, and like five or six of us wore plaid, Robin being the trendsetter (as usual). It was low-key and mellow, I smoked not as much weed as I thought, and I didn't break down into terrible tears, although I did cry a couple of times. Maybe emotions will hit me tomorrow, but so far the anxiety and surge of emotion has been worse in the lead up to today than it has been on the actual day. So frequently that happens. I'm staying at the airbnb my mom booked for the event and for some people to stay at. My dad's parents and sister stayed with my mom (lol, also side note my aunt and mom are sleeping in the same bed, also lol), as well as my brother, in the house. So tonight I'm going to sleep in the other bed in the room my brother is in. Just like old times when we went on vacation. And I'm ten minutes from home if I want to leave, unlike vacation.

It's finally quiet, and as I have time to reflect, I think more feelings will probably come up, but it just happened that my therapist's next available appointment was the day after our event and we both agreed it might be nice to be able to decompress the next day. I'm taking Tyler's ashes in with me to bed tonight. I don't think Seth will care honestly, but I'm prepared to have a real sibling fight if he has a problem with it. Tyler and I would've slept on that twin sized bed together and cuddled up real tight to not fall off, that's what we did on my childhood bed at my mom's house, and Scotty would sleep on top of us. Good times.

I was literally interrupted by my grandma (not the one I live with) and I just talked to her for two and a half hours. Grief, love, loss. I am so tired. So much of my remembrance of Tyler happened after the actual event ended. I showed pictures, I talked to my dad, I talked to my grandma, I talked to my brother. So many conversations. It doesn't bring Tyler back, but it felt nice to be listened to, even if it took all day. I'm going to get so little sleep. Goodnight... I mean, good morning everyone.

#grief

[all-the-fun-of-the-cirkus]

so my great album odyssey has apparently turned into a great neil young odyssey, bc today's was zuma

when i started properly familiarising myself with neil's stuff, there were a fair few albums i'd heard a lot about, that i was (and am!) excited to get to. rust never sleeps, his defiant statement of intent in the punk era. tonight's the night, a gruelling howl of pain into the void. after the gold rush, the moment when he figures himself out and brings it all together. zuma, on the other hand, seems to be "the one with cortez the killer on it." which is a damn shame, bc man is this a fantastic record

obviously cortez is the best song on it, and possibly his finest moment. i've heard it well over a hundred times in all likelihood, and what always stands out to me is that it's not an epic guitar workout. it's mostly quiet, subtle, and the lead guitar is effectively variations on the theme, but wow it's utterly hypnotic. "solemn" is the best word i've seen used to describe it. it could go on another ten minutes and i don't think it would get boring, an absolute masterclass in quiet sadness. i think the lyrics are more interesting than people make out, too, but i'm writing a separate post on that

the actual guitar workout is danger bird, which was apparently lou reed's favourite song of his. apparently he had good taste, bc this song rules. the chorus in particular is utterly crushing; i'm always weak for "vocalists sing different lyrics against each other" anyway, but the sheer majesty of the backing vocals is stunning, especially in the contrast between their stateliness and neil's screaming, hoarse and more than slightly off-key performance. plus, the final chorus, unexpectedly quiet and instrumental, is a showstopping moment and the solos on here are just amazing. i really like neil as a guitarist; he's sloppy, often simple, and that's exactly the point. i'm not sure any other guitarist would improve his songs. actually on that front this is an incredible guitar album. the tones are great, and every song has interesting interplay and solos, even the relative filler. fav moments would include the haunting distant melody in pardon my heart and the burning fuzz of drivin' back

i'm not going to go track-by-track, but the slight weak point is stupid girl, which is a little similar to danger bird musically and the lyrics make me feel a bit squiffy, even if they seem a little half-hearted (it's not exactly idiot wind levels of venom). every other song has something really interesting. take lookin' for a love, which is probably a lesser track and sounds kind of generic at first. but then you notice just how sad neil's vocals sound for such an upbeat track and lyrics. and then you notice the cool guitar interplay, and then you get to that lovely chorus, with the moment of darkness, the wonderful descending guitar line, and suddenly it doesn't seem so lesser after all. it's sort of the mellow my mind of this album. but every song on here has something like that

the album structure intrigues me a lot, too. i'll talk about it more when i talk about cortez, but there's an interesting ebb and flow to the emotions. it's not quite "five stages of grief" or anything, but, like, this is a breakup album, and the shifts from sadness to anger to fondness are fascinating. this is a fabulous album, and the first major surprise i've had with neil's repertoire so far

#neil young #folk rock #the next album i get to will probably be by someone other than neil young at this point #didn't expect this to turn into a fan blog but y'know

[ourlittledinosaur]

Dear Stranger...Please Don't Touch My Baby!

New Post has been published on http://ourlittledinosaur.com/dear-stranger-please-dont-touch-my-baby/

Dear Stranger...Please Don't Touch My Baby!

We’ve All Been There…

You’re in a public place with your little one and a kindly stranger approaches to express adoration over your baby. Whether you’re carrying a newborn just days old, or a giggling toddler, you probably don’t want a stranger to touch your child.

I had been warned about this from seasoned mothers, but still I wasn’t truly prepared for how I should react to this situation. This letter was written in response to this very situation. I’m not going to lie, I was a little fired up about this when I originally wrote it. Needless to say I sat on it a while before posting in the hopes that I could mellow it out. I don’t know how successful I was, but I’ve come to the conclusion, it’s ok to protect my child. It’s with that thought that I write this letter. (Keep in mind, my son was 12 months at the time of this scene, and I was still able to wear him.)

Don’t Touch My Baby!

First things, first!  A little humor:

“Dear Stranger,

I hope this letter finds you well. We’ve not met before today, but I was compelled to write to you because of something that bothered me about our encounter earlier.

Today, my sister and I went to the grocery store together to do some shopping. I was carrying my son as I always do in his infantino carrier facing towards me. I find that wearing him helps to keep him from getting antsy in the cart seat. Also, we’re learning that he’s a bit shy and he feels more safe and secure close to Mommy.  Let’s face it, all the people in the store can be a little overwhelming for us grown-ups, not to mention little ones.

I saw you smiling at us in the checkout line today, and I smiled in return. It’s always nice to see a friendly face, as that is so rare these days. Moments later, I was looking the other direction to say something to my sister. Within a few more seconds, I was facing forward again, and taken aback, when I suddenly realized that you had approached us and had your hand on my son’s face. Shocked, I immediately turned my body to move my son away from your touch.

Please understand, I am not trying to be rude. I think that if you were in my place, you might feel as dismayed as I did. You see ma’am, it’s flu season and although you seem nice, I don’t know you. I don’t know what germs you may carry. I’m not saying you’re dirty – you certainly seem nice enough, but not even you are aware of all the germs that may be on your hands after all the grocery items you handled just now. I also have been handling groceries, which is why I refrain from stroking my son’s cheek until after we return home and I have washed my hands. I realize some may consider this overprotective, and while I’m all about kids building immunity, I prefer them to do it playing in the dirt or petting our animals.

We grown-ups also have to realize that although he is small, (and absolutely adorable, I agree!), he is still a person. Let me explain what I am getting at. You and I, being strangers, would never imagine walking up and stroking each other’s faces, would we? I think it’s important for us to remember that these little ones still need the respect of personal space. He is young and cannot speak for himself just yet, but he is his own person. It’s my job to protect him and to be his voice while he is learning how to find his own and can communicate that he doesn’t like a stranger being so close to us. Stroking his cheek or his hair, or really any touching in general without permission, just isn’t appropriate.

I must admit, I was upset with you, although I didn’t say anything. Truth be told, I was more upset with myself because I didn’t say anything. So I’ve made up my mind that in the future, I’m going to allow myself to speak up, even at the cost of seeming rude.  This isn’t the first time a stranger has approached us this way, and in my opinion, I have erred on the side of “grin and bear it” too many times. It’s not fair to my son for me to do nothing and for you to think that this is ok.

In the future, I encourage you to refrain from touching children and babies you do not know. I don’t know of a any parent who doesn’t have a problem with this on some level, and you are putting people in a really awkward position of having to be direct with you, which may put yourself in a potentially unpleasant situation.

In closing, if you would like to chat with me and my child in the store, I am more than happy to do so. I actually love talking to strangers! And my son loves to smile at you too. We welcome the conversation. Just please. Please don’t touch my kid.

Sincerely,

Lil’ Dino Mommy a.k.a. Momma Bear”

Like this post? Help us and others by Sharing!

Share List

SGMB_URL = "/wp-content/plugins/social-media-pro/"; jQuery(".dropdownWrapper").hide(); SGMB_GOOGLE_ACOUNT = "UA-88059982-5"; jQuery(document).ready(function($)var widget = new SGMBWidget();widget.show("id":"1","title":"Share All","options":"currentUrl":"1","url":"","shareText":"I really enjoyed this, I think you will too!","fontSize":"20","betweenButtons":"1px","theme":"classic","sgmbButtonsPosition":"bottomCenter","socialTheme":"classic","icon":"default","buttonsPanelEffect":"No Effect","buttonsEffect":"tada","iconsEffect":"No Effect","buttons":"\"mewe\":\"label\":\"Share\",\"icon\":\"default-mewe\",\"stumbleupon\":\"label\":\"Share\",\"icon\":\"default-stumbleupon\",\"email\":\"label\":\"E-mail\",\"icon\":\"default-email\",\"linkedin\":\"label\":\"Share\",\"icon\":\"default-linkedin\",\"pinterest\":\"label\":\"Pin this\",\"icon\":\"default-pinterest\",\"tumblr\":\"label\":\"Post\",\"icon\":\"default-tumblr\",\"twitter\":\"label\":\"Tweet\",\"icon\":\"default-twitter\",\"via\":\"\",\"hashtags\":\"#parenthood\",\"twitterFollow\":\"twitterFollowShowCounts\":\"\",\"setLargeSizeForTwitterFollow\":\"on\",\"followUserName\":\"OurLilDinosaur\",\"facebook\":\"label\":\"Share\",\"icon\":\"default-facebook\"","roundButton":"","showLabels":"","showCounts":"on","showCenter":"on","showButtonsAsList":"","sgmbDropdownColor":"","sgmbDropdownLabelFontSize":"14","sgmbDropdownLabelColor":"","showButtonsOnEveryPost":"on","selectedOrExcluded":"","showButtonsOnEveryPage":"","textOnEveryPost":"Like this post? Help us and others by Sharing!","showButtonsOnCustomPost":"","textOnCustomPost":"","showButtonsOnMobileDirect":"on","showButtonsOnDesktopDirect":"on","sgmbSelectedPages":[""],"sgmbExcludedPosts":[""],"sgmbSelectedCustomPosts":[],"showButtonsInPopup":"","titleOfPopup":"Please share it!","descriptionOfPopup":"Go ahead and share our site if you liked it!","showPopupOnLoad":"","showPopupOnScroll":"","showPopupOnExit":"","openSecondsOfPopup":"","googleAnaliticsAccount":"UA-88059982-5","buttonOptions":"mewe":"label":"Share","icon":"default-mewe","stumbleupon":"label":"Share","icon":"default-stumbleupon","email":"label":"E-mail","icon":"default-email","linkedin":"label":"Share","icon":"default-linkedin","pinterest":"label":"Pin this","icon":"default-pinterest","tumblr":"label":"Post","icon":"default-tumblr","twitter":"label":"Tweet","icon":"default-twitter","via":"","hashtags":"#parenthood","twitterFollow":"twitterFollowShowCounts":"","setLargeSizeForTwitterFollow":"on","followUserName":"OurLilDinosaur","facebook":"label":"Share","icon":"default-facebook","button":["mewe","stumbleupon","email","linkedin","pinterest","tumblr","twitter","twitterFollow","facebook"], 4, '', '/wp-content/plugins/social-media-pro//img/no-image.png', '', ''); );

jQuery(".socialMediaOnEveryPost").addClass("sgmb-center")

#Parenthood #Teaching and Guiding our Children

[ist-das-kunst-oder-kann-das-weg]

Look who’s back! Actually, I picked my accordion up last week but only on Wednesday I properly had time to play again and torture my neighbours. 

Even though the lady who tuned it told me she had changed the sound of the tremolo I had not expected it to sound that... musette-y. So now I really sound like all those buskers with their shitty instruments, and not only because I play badly. I actually told her to change it but rather in the opposite direction, making it kinda more mellow and a bit more like those fancy soloist instruments. 

When I am grown up and rich, you know, perhaps I might get myself one. Also it should have free bass, so that you can play melodies over more than an octave in the bass. Alas, they only come in black or white, but I have always wanted a red accordion (probably because my mother’s is red (and her’s has a fantastic sound, even though it is not a soloist’s instrument)).

Now I am torn, because on the one hand, I also like that sound and, let’s be honest, I am not playing on a level where the sound of my tremolo matters, but on the other hand it sounds brutally kitschy, which I only sometimes like. Well, everything is in tune now and I hope it stays that way for quite some time, but I was told it took quite some time because it always lost its tuning, sooooo. Gah.

At least, playing is still fun. Now I only need to find my sheet music for Csardas by Monti which has been missing for years now but I want to play it so badly now, lol. 

Whatever.

I actually got the ticket for Le Corsaire, which I will be seeing on Sunday, but only after Bs little birthday party. A real party (by our student representatives) is tonight. It’s been so long I went somewhere you dance, I am really out of practice! The other’s probably never were in practice, so we’ll see how much fun we’re gonna have. As A defended her bachelor’s thesis today and got a nearly perfect grade, we’ll be celebrating her. 

#dear diary #kinda ranting #accordion #akkordeon

[baroquebucky]

smooth like butter

bucky just loves flirting with you

word count: 3.7k

masterlist

a/n: hi hi bffs !! hope ur all doing well <3 here is a flirty bucky fic inspired by butter !! he is so charming i am gonna punch a wall,, hope u all enjoy let me know what u guys think & remember to stream butter <33

Bucky didn’t think he had it in him anymore, he thought surely that part of him from the 40s was long gone, erased from him after all these years.

Then his eyes landed on you at the coffee shop, a bright smile on your face as you picked up your order and made small talk with the barista, you looked so happy and god you were the most beautiful person in the world. He felt himself blushing as you turned around, his gaze quickly focusing on the the coffee infront of him.

He pulled his phone and immediately texted Sam, not know how to handle the situation.

just talk to her buck, I’m sure you’ll fall into routine like back in the day ;)

Bucky scoffed at his message, looking up to find you but you were nowhere in sight. He frowned, looking out the window and seeing you walking down the street, coffee in hand. His heart dropped a bit, upset he would never see you again, but he brushed it off quickly.

Sam was over for the weekend, the two sat in Buckys living room, watching a soccer game and making small talk.

“was thinking of getting a cat” bucky mentioned, taking a sip of his beer and looking at Sam. The man smiled, nudging his friend.

“ooh okay! gonna get yourself a little grumpy staring partner i see” Sam teased and bucky rolled his eyes smiling at his friend.

“dunno if i should, you know since we go on missions all the time” he frowned and Sam shook his head.

“you can always ask your neighbors to cat sit if your gone for too long, I’m sure it won’t be too much of a hassle” Sam assured his friend and bucky smiled, nodding his head as the two friends relaxed.

The next day bucky headed to the nearest animal shelter, nervous to pick out his new feline friend, his eyes shining as they took him around the facility, presenting each of the cats with utmost pride.

“this guys name is alpine, he’s quite mellow and sweet, very well behaved and house trained” Buckys eyes met with the cats and he smiled, the cat purring into Buckys hand.

“I’ll take him” he smiled, the cat cooing up to the super soldier with ease. As he signed all the papers, alpine continued to purr into Buckys touch, excited to finally have a home.

“you can pick him up in two to three weeks after we finish up checking him out and giving him some shots! We’ll give you a call two days prior if that’s fine with you?” The receptionist smiled and bucky nodded, waving goodbye to alpine and walking out the shelter doors.

Bucky had a smile on his face and his eyes were for once off the floor, smiling to himself as he shopped for his new friend, getting him all sorts of toys and treats. He easily went up the stairs to his apartment before stopping at his door and realizing he need to unlock the door. The boxed and bags he had so delicately balanced came tumbling down as he set them down to reach for his key.

“fuck” he whispered, trying to balance everything only to have him drop his key.

“let me help!” he heard a sweet voice, he was too embarrassed to look up, fumbling with everything as you took half the things in your hand and let him grab the keys. Bucky looked up and met your eyes, his heart raced and he realized it was you, from the coffee shop.

He didn’t let his state linger for long, quickly moving to unlock the door and grab the rest of the things from the floor, holding the door open and inviting you in.

“you can set it on the counter, thanks so much” he smiled, you nodded, placing everything down gently as your arms already shook from how heavy the boxes were.

“you’re getting a cat?” You smiled and bucky heard sams words ringing in his ears, just be yourself, let the 40s flow back to you, he had scoffed at him before but now here was bucky, letting himself just trust his gut.

“yeah! i get lonely sometimes and ive always wanted a cat” bucky smiled, your knees buckled. God his smile, that had to be the most charming smile in all of Brooklyn, you were sure of it.

“oh nice! I used to have a cat, his name was mittens” you smiled, nervous as he looked at you, your fiddled with your fingers before realizing he probably wanted you to leave.

“I’ll get going don’t wanna bother you” you smiled, waving goodbye to him.

“wait!” bucky called out and you stopped in your tracks, face flushed as you turned around. Bucky smiled at you before speaking up.

“what’s your name? I could’ve sworn I’ve never seen you around, i would’ve remembered someone a pretty as you” he asked and you chuckled lightly, blushing at his words and your palms sweating a bit.

“y/n, I’m two doors down” you smiled and he returned it, walking up to you, your heart raced in your chest as he stuck his hand out for you to shake. You shook his hand quickly, noting the way his hands were much warmer than yours and how his calloused hand felt against yours. Your stomach was in knots by the time you pulled away, mind racing and wondering if he felt how sweaty your hands were.

“I’m bucky” he replied, “I’ll see you around i hope” bucky grinned and you nodded.

“if you ever need anything you know where to find me!” You shot him one last grin and walked out, face hot and heart racing. You felt a bead of sweat rolling down the side of your face and you couldn’t stop yourself from laughing once you shut the door to your apartment, you were so flustered by him you were fucking sweating.

You had seen bucky in the halls a couple times, flashing each other a smile and making small talk. Each and every time you found yourself nervous under his gaze, sweating once the two of you parted ways and you hoped to god he never noticed. Bucky being the observant super soldier he was, did notice, but he found it sickeningly sweet. His heart fluttering as he noticed the way your heart rate quickened around him, the way you fumbled over your words at times and fiddled with your fingers.

Bucky took any and every opportunity to talk to you, helping you with groceries even if you weren’t struggling, dropping stuff on purpose for you to help him out. He even invited you out for dinner a couple times, the two of you getting along perfectly and conversation flowing easily.

“you know you have a really nice smile” you complimented him as you stopped infront of your door.

“do i?” Bucky grinned and you nodded, heart racing as you looked away from him, “then whyd you always look away when i smile at you?” He teased your mouth flew open.

“i- well it’s just- you-” he cut you off with a small laugh.

“just teasing you doll, i have the same smile as my mom” he spoke softly and you smiled, you hand squeezing his slightly, “you should get to bed, don’t you have work in the morning?” Bucky grinned and you nodded.

“You’re quite the charmer james” you whispered and you looked into his blue eyes, leaning in and giving him a quick kiss on the cheek, “I’ll see you soon” you smiled before walking into your apartment, leaving bucky outside smiling like a fool.

The shelter called bucky a couple days after that date and bucky couldn’t get to the shelter fast enough, excited to bring home his new friend. Scooping him up into his arms and signing a couple more papers before walking out of the shelter with a wide smile, cooing at the white cat.

“got someone who i think’ll wanna meet you buddy” he smiled, pulling into the apartment complex and walking up to his apartment, letting himself in and setting down alpine to explore.

“youll pee here, this is your litter box, best of the best for you” bucky smiled, pointing everything out to the cat. He played with him for a bit, giving the cat sometime to get used to his surroundings before going two doors down and knocking, a smile on his face.

Your heart jumped at the sudden sound, you weren’t expecting anyone so who was this? You looked through the peephole and saw bucky, a small smile on his face as he looked down at the floor and then back down to his door.

“oh god, oh fuck” you whispered, looking at the mirror next to you and taking in your appearance, you were in sweats and a t shirt, hair slightly messy. You tried fixing your hair to the best of your abilities before taking a deep breath and opening the door.

Bucky could hear you panicking, he bit his lip to stop the smile on his face. But he failed miserably as you opened the door and gave him a shy smile.

“hi bucky! i wasn’t expecting you” you laughed softly and he gave you a small smile.

“sorry, i just- i got alpine- my cat, i picked him up today and figured maybe you wanna meet him?” he asked, rubbing the back of his neck and your eyes lit up, a smile on your face as you nodded quickly.

“oh! yes oh my god yeah let’s go!” You giggled, following bucky quickly down the hall and into his apartment. Your eyes landed on the white cat and your hands flew to your mouth.

“he’s so cute!” You cried out, bucky smiling at your reaction, alpine quickly noticing you and walking up to you. “hi little kitty, are you alpine? such a sweet name for a sweet boy!” you cooed, smiling as you crouched down and let the cat. Bucky couldn’t stop his heart from fluttering, cheeks flushing as he watched you.

“can i pick him up?” You asked, looking up at bucky and he nodded, you swiftly picked the cat up with a wide smile.

“you can sit on the couch if you’d like” bucky smiled and you thanked him, gently sitting on the couch and bucky followed suit, giving you some space. The two of you took turns petting and cuddling on alpine, soft giggled filling his apartment.

“thanks for introducing me” you spoke and bucky grinned at you.

“‘course, had to show him the most beautiful gal here” bucky smiled and you blushed at his comment, but he didn’t stop there. “i was wondering actually uh- stark has this gala thing- i mean you can say no it’s just- do you wanna go with me?”

Now it was Buckys turn to blush, he knew there was a huge chance you’d say no. I mean you hardly knew each other, the longest you had talked was for like 30 minutes in your apartment when he helped you bring up groceries two days ago.

“me?” You questioned, eyes wide as bucky nodded.

“I’ll get a dress for you and everything, just need to take someone and I’d prefer it be you” he smiled, how could you say no to him?

“uh- i wow- i mean” you sputtered out before stopping yourself and nodding, “yeah okay” you smiled and bucky grinned.

“thanks so much doll” he spoke and you couldn’t wipe the smile off your face, giddy with excitement.

Soon enough the gala came and bucky dropped off your dress, letting you know he’d drop by at 5:30 to pick you up to head to the dance. You were nervous as you slipped the gown on, it was a black to match the suit he’d be wearing, somewhat simple but had some pretty accents throughout that made it absolutely stunning.

You got ready quickly, bucky knocking at the door before you had a chance to slip your shoes on. You opened the door with a smile, Buckys mouth falling open.

“oh wow” was all he said, immediately closing his mouth and clearing his throat, “i mean- i- hi” he chuckled and you smiled, letting him.

“i brought you flowers” he grinned and you blushed, smiling at the beautiful roses he handed you.

“bucky barnes ever the gentleman” you grinned and he smirked.

“only the best for my gal” he shot back and your heart raced, moving to put the flowers in water and rushing to slip your heels on.

“let me just finish getting ready, I’ll be done in a minute” you smiled, looking at him through the mirror as you put on some earrings.

“you’re so gorgeous, melting my heart like it’s butter” he smiled, dazed in your beauty. Your heart continued to face and you smiled, rolling your eyes at him.

“oh hush” you protested, finally finishing and holding the door for the two of you to head out. He offered you his arm and you gladly too it, taking the elevator and stealing a glance at him. Bucky noticed and smiled, standing up a bit straighter.

As the two of you arrived you grew self conscious, there were so many other people here, so many girls that were much prettier than you and most likely much better than you. Bucky noticed your discomfort quickly and pulled you closer to him, giving you a reassuring smile.

The two of you walking over to where the rest of the team was and he smiled widely as Sam and steve made eye contact with him. Tony flashing you a smile.

“hey guys” bucky smiled and you followed his lead, grinning at everybody, trying to appear composed even though you were absolutely yelling your lungs out on the inside. “this is y/n, y/n this is- well this is the rest of the team” he chuckled and you laughed softly.

“hi! it’s a pleasure to meet you all” you greeted and they smiled, wanda immediately coming up to you and giving you a hug.

“I’m wanda! It’s nice to meet you, do you wanna get a drink?” She asked and you looked at bucky quickly before smiling with a nod, natasha following the two of you as you all walked over to the bar, bucky sitting next to steve and Sam.

“you’re dating bucky?” She whispered and you blushed, shaking your head.

“oh no! we’re just neighbors- well we’re friends, we talk sometimes” you rambled and Natasha smiled.

“ever since you helped him with whatever it was last week or two weeks ago he hasn’t shut up about you” Natasha whispered and you blushed, looking over at where bucky was and your heart raced as you made eye contact with him, quickly turning your head away from him.

“it’s true, even came to me for advice, I’m the one who suggested he ask you to come tonight!” Wanda smiled widely and you took a sip from your drink.

“let’s change the topic, what’s your favorite pasta shape?” You smiled.

Steve and Sam cheered on bucky as he sat down next to them.

“told you she would say yes!” Sam smiled, patting his back.

“i knew you still had it in you” steve smirked and bucky couldn’t stop the smile on his face as he watched you talk and laugh with nat and wanda.

“shes perfect” bucky mumbled, face beating up as Sam and steve made a fuss, “oh will you two shut up” he rolled his eyes, smile still on his face as his two friends continued to tease him, forcing him to spill his guts.

“can i buy you drink sweet cheeks?” You heard from behind you, but you ignored it, thinking they were talking to Natasha or wanda. The two girls looked at you with wide eyes when you didn’t react. Your eyes wide when you realized they were talking to you.

“me?” You asked, laughing slightly as the man nodded, a smirk on his face. You looked over at wanda and Natasha and they gave you a wink, your heart raced.

“uh- okay i guess” you smiled, ordering up enough for the three of you before smiling at the man, downing your shot with wanda and Natasha and ditching the man before he could even see where the three of you headed off to.

Bucky smiled as he watched the way you doubled over in laughter with the girls, wiping at your eyes softly to stop the tears of joy from ruining your makeup.

Soon enough the three of you walked back to the team, you sat next to bucky, letting yourself relax into his touch. After a couple minutes you saw steve and bucky both perk up, the sound of some 40s song playing as couples swayed on the dance floor.

“would you care to dance with me doll?” bucky asked with a smile and your heart raced.

“oh i don’t know how to dance” you whispered and Buckys smile only grew, “I’ll teach you darlin” he smirked as he easily pulled to to your feet, leading you to the dance floor and ignoring the whoops and cheers from the others.

With seconds the two of you were on the dance floor, bucky looking at you with soft eyes as you stood in front of him, looking around at everyone.

“eyes on me doll, or else you won’t learn” he teased you felt your stomach flutter. “side step right left to my beat doll, just follow the flow of the music” he spoke softly, your arms snaking around his neck and his cautiously let his hands rest on your hips.

“look at you, already getting the hang of it” he praised you and your heart raced, smiling up at him, you were only inches away from his face.

“you know nat and wanda told me some pretty crazy things” you whispered and bucky hummed.

“things like what?” he smirked, already knowing what you were gonna say.

“like how you’ve been talking ‘bout me” you spoke, the two of you still swaying to the music.

“i have been doll” he replied quickly, spinning you around before catching you back in his arms once again.

“what’ve you been saying?” You asked, breathless as the two of you were closer than before.

“oh you know, just how you’re the girl of my dreams, how i wanna make you my girl but i dunno what you’d say” he spoke smoothly, his cool tone causing your knees to buckle. Bucky held you up firmly, smiling at you.

“oh” you managed to squeak out, “well i wouldn’t say no” was all you managed out and bucky laughed softly. Your blue eyes met his and you felt your heartbeat in your ears, eyes flickering down to his lips. “what- what else did you say” you asked and he smiled.

“let me show you, talk is cheap and don’t mean a thing” he mumbled, slowly leaning into you, without a moments hesitation you crashed your lips onto his, your eyes fluttering closed as your mouths moved together, smiling into the kiss and pulling at the hair at the nape of his neck.

For a second the world melted away, it was just the two of you, rocking back and forth to the soft music as you smiled into the kiss, pulling away breathless with sparkling eyes and pink lips.

Then everything came back to you, suddenly everyone’s presence was a little too prominent for your liking, face growing hot. Bucky smiled at you, not wasting a second before grabbing your wrist and pulling you along, walking out of the venue and waving goodbye to everyone hastily. Wanda and Natasha shot you a thumbs up and you smiled brightly.

Within moments the two of you were alone outside, the cool Brooklyn air refreshing both of your flushed skin.

“you know, was gonna ask you to be my girl with a bunch of flowers and over a candle lit dinner” bucky chuckled and you smiled softly at him, your fingers intertwining in his hand.

“why don’t you?” you asked softly, he smiled at you as he threw his head back with a soft groan.

“cant wait that long doll face, i just wanna be yours already” he grinned, looking at you with soft eyes, adoration clear on his face.

“what’re you waiting for barnes?” You teased, stopping in your tracks and crossing your arms over your chest.

“for us to get back to your apartment so i can kiss you all night” he shot back with a smirk, loving the way you looked at him with wide eyes and your heart raced. He pulled you into his chest, kissing you on the lips quickly before pulling away, not caring that he had red lipstick all over his mouth or that it was now smudged on your lips now.

“will you be my girl y/n?” He asked breathless, the stars twinkling above the two of you and the cold New York wind cooling your hot bodies.

“depends” you smiled, “how much time do i get to spend with alpine?” Bucky smiled brightly at you, picking you up in his arms and walking to the car.

“of course I’ll be your girl james” you replied, kissing up his neck and leaving a trail of red lipstick. Bucky opened the door with one hand, easily holding you up with his other before setting you down in the car seat.

“i know, just wanted to hear you say it” he smirked and you gasped.

“you’re too cocky for your own good” you teased him as he slid into the drivers seat.

“not cocky, just charming, that what you called me didn’t you” he replied quickly, leaning over and kissing you before starting to drive back to your apartment.

It’s safe to say that you spent a lot of time with alpine, cat sitting when bucky was away on missions and lazing the weekends away cuddled in bed or on the couch with bucky.

There was never a dull moment in your relationship with bucky, constantly flirting with you as if he hadn’t been dating you for years already. The Brooklyn boy was head over heels for you and was not afraid to let the world know.

Which is why he reminded you everyday how much he loved you. Because to him, you were his whole world and all he’d ever need.

#stream butter #soty me thinks #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes drabble #bucky barnes headcanon #bucky barnes one shot #bucky barnes blurb #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x reader #bucky x you #bucky imagine #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes #bucky barnes smut #soft bucky barnes #flirty bucky barnes #bucky barnes x fem!reader

[pies-writes-and-more]

HIHIHI I HAVE A REQUEST IF YOURE UP FOR IT KASJHDASKD i was wondering if you could do tsukishima, akaashi, and kageyama (you dont have to do all of them if you dont want to) with a s/o who loves giving affection but doesn't really take it *seriously* when they recieve it? like they think that the character is joking bc they could never actually be that amazing? (sry if this made absolutely no sense just ignore it if you want kaskjasd)

Warnings: potentially some swearing, Akaashi saying “good girl” which I do think deserves a warning, Y/N having some insecure moments, but all fluffy endings promise!

Characters: Tsukishima Kei, Akaashi Keiji, & Kageyama Tobio, all with a fem!Reader

A/N: okay @lucyheartfilias-wife i know this took foREVER for me to finish and I’m so sorry xD but i kept going back and forth between ideas so this is what we ended up with! I hope they’re decent enough!! <3 Not of the following gifs are mine! Creds to the original creators :)

Haikyuu Masterlist

Tsukishima Kei

If Tsukishima knew one thing, it was that he was a lucky boy. Somehow he had managed to make a girl who was probably made of sunshine and rainbows, like him back and somehow figured out how to keep you around.

Although he always had an annoyed look on his face when they did, anytime the team asked about you or mentioned you to him, he was always happy to subtly brag about you.

“Our little Tsukishima has grown up hasn’t he?” Sugawara laughed, slapping pats to the back of the tall first year. “You’re not blackmailing her are you?” Tsukishima just rolled his eyes in response.

“It must be nice to have such a pretty girl around!” Noya whined loudly, punching the wall angrily.

“It is,” Tsukishima smirked, enjoying the immediate anger that Noya tried to turn on him. Daichi held the wild libero back with an exasperated smiled, shaking his head.

“She’s really smart too isn’t she?” Hinata gaped, having only really heard of this girl that Tsukishima was dating but Yamaguchi said it was a girl in their class so she had to be smart.

“Anyone’s smart compared to you,” Tsukishima scoffed but shrugged. “She’s the top of our class.”

Everyone made sounds of excitement and surprise, the upperclassmen nodding in approval, “Who knew this salty bean pole could find someone smart and pretty to like him back?” Tanaka snickered and Tsukishima just rolled his eyes.

You hadn’t meant to overhear the conversations happening in the club room but you were just waiting for your boyfriend against the railing. To say you were a bit embarrassed was an understatement. And that embarrassment was probably written all over your face because when Tsukishima finally came out, his cheeks turned pink seeing your expression.

“What?” He asked after a beat, avoiding your eyes as he started to walk towards the stairs.

“You know you don’t have to lie to your teammates right?” You asked him eventually, giving him a small smile. “I’m sure they know you’re just being nice.”

For once, you had actually surprised Tsukishima. Normally he could tell exactly what you were thinking but this time, he actually stopped in his steps and looked at you like you had grown a second head in the last few moments.

“Lie?” He asked, tilting his head up in thought before scoffing a bit, “What part of what I said was a lie? For that matter, how much of that nonsense did you hear?”

The word nonsense rang in your ear repeatedly, echoing all your insecurities further into your subconscious, “I dunno, how much were you saying?” You retorted, glancing at him with a shrug. “Come on, I wanna get home before it gets too dark,” you decided when he didn’t answer right away. The two of you started walking, Tsukishima clearly deep in thought because for once on your way home, he wasn’t complaining about the boys or listening to music. He was just… walking.

“When did I lie?” He finally asked at your doorstep, as if realizing if he didn’t ask now, he never would. He grabbed your wrist before you could turn away and leave without answering him, tugging you closer so he could look right into your eyes (he could always tell when you were lying to him).

“What?” You squirmed a bit. You knew exactly what he was asking but did you really want to admit it?

“You said I lied to my teammates. What did I lie about?” His frown was tight, eyes as serious as ever. “I’ve been thinking about everything I said to them and I can’t think of a lie that I told. Was it about everyone being smarter than Hinata? Because I really was telling the truth.” The little smirk at the end made you feel like he was trying to keep this lighthearted. But the topic weighed so heavily on both your shoulders.

You could feel Tsukishima keeping your gaze right on him, and knew if you looked away, he might just get more upset. So you were forced to just look at him awkwardly, as if he was looking through your very thoughts.

“I asked you out didn’t I?” He continued when you didn’t respond right away. “Doesn’t that make you my girlfriend?”

You let out a little laugh, surprised that that’s what he had come up with after that very silent walk home. “Yeah, I suppose so,” you smiled, finally pulling your eyes away from him and staring at your hands as you fiddled with your fingers.

“So what-”

“They’re just being nice,” you tried to tell him awkwardly, cutting him off from asking one more time. “I’m not… I’m not everything they’re pretending I am. And you don’t have to keep up the charade with them.”

Tsukishima’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion, what charade could you possibly be talking about.

“I know I’m not as pretty as your managers,” you explained quietly. “And I’m sure being surrounded by them all the time has got you having some high expectations and standards for girls. That’s why I was surprised when you asked me out… but I know it’s probably just cause we’re always together and we study together. I know I’m pretty helpful when it comes to schoolwork so-”

Tsukishima started laughing. Like genuinely, throwing his head back, from the bottom of his belly kind of laugh. Your eyes widened as you watched this normally cool and collected idiot snicker himself practically to death.

“T-Tsukishima?” You blinked, poking him a little to make sure he wasn’t just having some sort of weird seizure.

He finally ran out of breath, standing back up straighter than ever and hitting the top of your head (not as gently as he should’ve, how rude), “Listen here, shortie,” he huffed, leaning down slightly so you were forced to look at him. “I have high standards for anyone I even keep around me. The only one who’s exceeded my standards for dating though, is you.”

You watched him, blinking nervously as if he was going to laugh in your face again and tell you it was a joke.

“I didn’t lie to them, idiot,” he shook his head, flicking your forehead. “You’re way too pretty to be as self-conscious as you are.”

Words would never solve your self-consciousness, you knew this. But if there was ever a moment that would ever come close - it would be this one.

“Go inside alright,” he grinned at you, pressing a quick kiss to your forehead and shoving you closer to your door. “And the next time I compliment you, you better accept it.”

You couldn’t even retort anything back before he ushered you inside, gave you a cheeky wink, and started to head home.

You were still very bad at accepting Tsukishima’s compliments and almost felt tortured with how much he could try to get you to understand how much he loved you. So naturally, Tsukishima just did it more and more.

Everything you did became a compliment, just to make you all hot headed and make him chuckle. He would praise you for being one of the smartest people he knew after a test or assignment, he’d say you were the cutest person up on the stands after his volleyball games, would just shower you in aggressive amounts of affection (well aggressive for him).

And then one day…

One day you day you didn’t fight back as much. And Tsukishima just smiled because he would never say anything to you he didn’t mean.

Akaashi Keiji

Akaashi was literally an embodiment of everything that someone could want. He was calm and wonderfully humble, his voice was like a mellow song that you could fall asleep to and he had the most amazing biceps that just made your heart flutter every time you saw them.

He was everything you could ever dream of which was both incredible… and not at the same time. It almost hurt to know that he was this unobtainable boy standing near you. Sure, you were dating - but how long until he realized you were beneath him? How much longer would it take him to realize that there was better.

You couldn’t hide these thoughts from Akaashi and more often than not, he’d give you a look like I know what you’re thinking, stop that, and then tell you he loves you before you just nod and smile and try to focus on something else. He’d let it go there, but he’d probably spend the rest of the day with you trying to convince you he really meant it.

But today he wasn’t next to you to read your face. Today, he was going to be down on that court, showing off his incredible reflexes and sports ability, and you would be up here. Blending in with the crowd. You were a filler character - something to fill the stands with and not be noticed. Unoriginal. Boring.

“Y/N!” Bokuto ran to you, grinning as wide as ever. “Look what I brought you!” He held up Akaashi’s jacket happily, waving it over his head as he jumped up and down in front of you.

You tried to put on a smile, as if you hadn’t just been spinning in your insecurities a few seconds ago. Your eyes focused on the jacket that Bokuto was trying to put on you, blinking as you came to the realization that he had 100% stolen this from your boyfriend without his knowledge, “Bokuto, won’t he need this?” You offered with a small laugh.

He shook his head with a grin, “He practically discarded it somewhere. I thought I’d come bring it to you! It would probably make him super happy to see you in his jacket! And you look so cute in our colours!” Bokuto declared, patting your head. You tried to start telling him that he should bring it back and that you weren’t really sure Akaashi would want you wearing it, but suddenly you could hear his coach on the court screaming from him to get his ass back down there. “Whoops! Gotta run! Cheer hard for us!” Bokuto gave you a thumbs up before running down.

You stood there for a moment, face feeling hot as you start to smell Akaashi’s scent on the jacket. How did he manage to smell this good all the time?

You could hear whispers from people in the stands, some people wondering who you were or if you were Bokuto or Akaashi’s girlfriend, since it was Bokuto who gave you the jacket.

All the ruckus from his coach made Akaashi actually look over, smirking a bit while Bokuto was getting scolded. He sheepishly made his way over, trying to seem all innocent to his best friend.

“Where the hell even were you?” Akaashi asked, throwing him a toss as the boys warmed up.

“Oh! Just dropping something off to Y/N for you!” Bokuto grinned, nodding in your direction as he received the ball nice and high.

Akaashi shouldn’t have looked over. But he did. His eyes locked onto you and saw you in his jacket and for a moment, he definitely spaced out. His whole brain was just thinking about you and nothing else and he didn’t knock himself out of it until Bokuto’s pass knocked him right in the head.

“Akaashi! Are you okay?” Bokuto laughed, knowing the pass had been pretty soft. Akaashi’s cheeks turn a bit pink as he shook it off, running after the ball.

You were wearing his jacket. And you looked so good in it.

After a complete win for the game, Akaashi was so hyped up to see you. You had worn his jacket the whole game and he had to avoid looking at you because you were just so distracting.

But now that it was over, he wanted nothing more than to swoop you into a hug and admire you. You gave him a huge grin when you caught up with the team, excitedly cheering them for their win and giving Bokuto high fives.

Akaashi watched you with a small smile on his face. You glanced over at him and gave a nervous sort of smile, noting there was a difference in how he was looking at you. “Oh! Here, you’ll get cold soon when your adrenaline stops pumping,” you said, pulling the jacket off.

“It’s alright,” he insisted, smirking a bit down at you. “You look gorgeous, I don’t want you to take it off,” he admitted with a smile, patting your head adoringly.

Your face gets all hot again, avoiding his eyes quickly, “Alright alright, Mr. High Off Of A Win,” you laughed nervously, poking at his chest gently. He raised an eyebrow at your dismissive behaviour.

“What do you mean?”

“Don’t go spreading stuff that isn’t true,” you shrugged, shoving your hands in the jacket pocket. Sure, you liked the jacket but there was no way you were as pretty as he was making you out to be. Gorgeous? No way.

Akaashi’s eyes darkened slightly hearing this, taking your chin into his fingers and tilting your chin up so you were forced to look at him, “You think I’d lie to you?”

The question made you shrink inside, noting his hardened expression. He didn’t like it when you were hard on yourself, always made you notice all the little great things about you. But this wasn’t a private conversation, and people were starting to stare, which just made your face go even warmer. “N-No,” you mumble out shyly, trying to look away but he kept your gaze.

“Good girl,” he smirked at you, tapping your nose gently, “Now take the compliment. And wear my jacket more often, alright?”

You couldn’t help but nod at that point, Akashi smiling in his satisfaction before dragging you off for the team’s celebratory meal. The pit in your stomach that liked to tell you you were a filler character was slightly less intense now, after talking to your boyfriend. Akaashi had such an effect on you and there was no denying it. How could a guy like that be with a girl like you, you would never understand. But there was such an honesty in his eyes, and he was right after all, he wasn’t the type to lie about these things… so maybe. Just maybe. There was some truth to it.

Kageyama Tobio

Kageyama wasn’t the best at noticing hints and subtle things, and honestly, he’d rather if people were just blunt and to the point with him. But with you, he knew that he would have to learn between the lines. It wasn’t because you weren’t great at communication (and let’s be honest, even if you were bad at it, Kageyama was in NO place to call you out on that), but rather, Kageyama understood that at some point in relationships, it was important to see what the other person wanted.

So when he started really trying to read you, he found himself almost discouraged by a reoccurring instance.

It was real subtle at first, and in that moment, Kageyama probably wouldn’t have noticed. But he probably just smile at you and press a kiss to your forehead, thanking you for always thinking of him.

“You’re always so thoughtful, Y/N. I appreciate what you do for me,” he told you, almost like he was thanking a teacher for their help on homework which just made you laugh.

“Don’t be silly, Kageyama, it’s just a milk box,” you insisted, giving a little wave to his teammates before he left.

But it wasn’t just a milk box and even Kageyama could see that. He had forgotten his lunch today and you had shared yours with him. But he always had a milk with his lunch and you didn’t have one, but he didn’t have the chance to actually buy one before he had to head back to classes. He didn’t think he had mentioned anything about the milk, or even hesitated to eat without it. But you had still gone out of your way to buy one for him and bring it to him after classes.

You had even apologized that it was later than he usually had his milk, as if you should’ve known to get it earlier. Kageyama was amazed that you even went and bought him one. He held the box in his hands for a moment before getting called over to start practice, promising himself to have the drink right after practice.

It wasn’t just that you brushed off his appreciation for what you did for him. Kageyama always felt something was wrong when he complimented you. So much so, he had to awkwardly ask his upperclassmen for help.

“Oh our little Kageyama needs help with his girlfriend hmmm?” Tanaka laughed, hands on his hips like he was some sort of relationship expert.

“I dunno why you’d come to us,” Daichi admitted with a smirk, leaning against a nearby wall as he considered the question. “It’s not like any of us are really all that experienced with girls.”

“But you know how to… communicate,” Kageyama explained, playing with his fingers as he shyly stared at the floor. “I’m just worried I’m… doing that thing that Hinata says I do. Where I think I’m complimenting her but I’m actually hurting her.”

Sugawara chuckled and threw his arm around his first year’s neck, fluffing up his hair playfully, “Aw! Little Tobio is growing up!”

“What kinds of things are you saying to her?” Asahi asked, offering Kageyama a smile as the blueberry boy tried to fix his now messed up hair.

Kageyama thought about it for a moment, not having to think that far back to remember an example. “This morning, she was wearing her hair differently,” Kageyama told them, gesturing towards his hair as if to act out how her hair was. “And I told her she looked very pretty.”

The boys just looked at him, as if expecting for there to be more. “Okay and?” Noya piped up, shrugging.

“That’s it,” Kageyama blinked. “Should I have said something else?”

“Why would you say something else, Kageyama?” Daichi raised an eyebrow, noting the distress in the setter’s eyes.

Kageyama huffed, remembering how you awkwardly turned away, as if he had said something brash, “She just said ‘you don’t have to do that, Kageyama’ and changed the subject. But I don’t know what she meant. Was… Was I not supposed to tell her? She did look very pretty but should I have kept that to myself?”

Sugawara gave him a sympathetic smile, “I think you did fine, Kageyama, don’t worry! Maybe she was just embarrassed.”

The others agreed, Tanaka explaining to him that some people were bashful when it came to their appearances.

“But she’s the most perfect being in the whole country!” Kageyama burst out, his forehead creased with concern. “Why shouldn’t I tell her?”

“Just in the country?” Asahi chuckled and Sugawara smacked his arm.

“Don’t tease him, I don’t think Kageyama has ever left the country!”

“Maybe she’s just not used to you complimenting her. Like how you weren’t too used to holding hands with her at the beginning of your relationship,” Daichi offered, remembering how red the boy’s face was you first took his hand at a tournament. He didn’t even know he had to hold your hand back and just had his hand staying there stiff.

Kageyama nodded slowly - he could understand that. It just took some time and then he was okay with it eventually. Now he would grab your hand out of instinct and it wasn’t something foreign to him.

After talking to his upperclassmen, Kageyama felt a little better. Perhaps it wasn’t his words then, maybe he just had to do it more.

But after a week of trial and error, Kageyama still couldn’t understand why you still seemed so uncomfortable. The day after consulting the second and third years, Kageyama had told you he really liked the way you hummed and that you had a really nice voice (he really did like it, it was his favourite thing to listen to).

But you just flickered your eyes away from him, offering a nervous laugh, “It’s nothing,” you mumbled before quickly asking him about his practice schedule.

So Kageyama thought maybe you just didn’t like talking about your singing. So when the two of you were studying, you noticed his laser focus wasn’t on his work but instead on you. His eyes were so trained on you, it was like how he was on the volleyball court.

“Kageyama?” You blinked in surprise, catching him staring at you. “Are you alright?”

“You’re really smart, Y/N!” He blurted out, a firm nod afterwards like confirming what he was saying. “I appreciate you always coming to help me work!”

But you just squirmed in your seat, turning your eyes back to your work, “I really don’t know all that much.”

It had been a week of this back and forth, Kageyama desperately trying to find what was going on. Was it him? Was he just not using the right words? Could he actually be being really rude and didn’t realize it? Was it his face? Was he supposed to smile more?

Finally, Kageyama felt like he was at the end of his rope. He didn’t know what to do now.

“The sunset is really pretty today!” You beamed as the two of you walked home from his practice. He glanced over and noticed the brilliant colours in the sky. It looked nice sure, but how could you understand that that looked pretty and you didn’t?

“I think you’re prettier.” He stated simply. Kageyama didn’t really know what lines were cheesy and what weren’t. But you did and your face just overheated immediately in response.

“K-Kageyama, don’t say things like that!” You insisted, staring to walk ahead.

“Wait!” Kageyama yelped, grabbing onto your wrist and pulling you back to him. “What am I doing wrong?” he asked you desperately, his eyes wide and searching yours for some sort of answers.

You stared at him for a moment, confused by his words, “Wrong?” You repeated softly, noticing how upset he looked.

“I…” Kageyama’s voice faltered as he watched your eyes. “I keep trying to tell you how amazing you are. You do all these things for me, you help me when I’m upset and you always help me train. You throw balls for me and Hinata, even when you’d rather be at home. You call me during my jogs just to keep me company. You bring me milk when I forget mine. And you always compliment me when I’m feeling like I’m not 100%… so what am I doing wrong? Because everything I say to you… it doesn’t seem to work.”

Something in you clicked. Is this why Kageyama had been acting so weird this week?

“Kageyama… I do all that because I like you and I want you to be your best,” you explained softly. “And I compliment you because I mean it! Not because I’m trying to make you feel better. Or try to boost your self-esteem.”

There was something in your tone that Kageyama couldn’t place. What was that in your voice?

“Why are you sad when I try to tell you things?” Kageyama was practically begging you for an answer. He didn’t understand how to read things from your tone, he wanted to desperately to understand but he just couldn’t grasp it. “Sugawara told me that complimenting people on things makes them feel good… am I doing it wrong? Please just tell me, I’ll be better! I’ll be the best boyfriend!”

Your smile was almost sad and Kageyama’s heart tugged a little in his chest, “I don’t want you to say things because you feel like you have to say them,” you sighed softly, now avoiding his eyes. “I know my hair is a mess most of the time, I know that my singing isn’t some professional level shit, and I know I’m not the model kind of girl or those gorgeous girls who come to your games. I don’t need you to try and convince me otherwise…”

Kageyama’s mind felt like it was blowing up. What were you talking about?

“Don’t be so stupid,” Kageyama whined, huffing at you and poking your forehead, “You think I’m lying about these things? You think I say them because I feel like I have to?” Kageyama shook his head, taking your face into his hands. “I’m not the best with words, I know this. But you are…” Kageyama’s face twisted into a funny expression as he tried to find the words he wanted, “the most perfect thing. You’re like when I make a perfect set and the spike goes right past the blockers!”

You couldn’t help but smile as he went on talking about volleyball. You weren’t surprised - he often related things to volleyball to understand better.

“You… are the perfect jump serve. Seeing you is like I’m winning full sets at Nationals!” He expressed, looking at you with wide eyes in hopes you were understanding. “I’m not trying to make you feel better about yourself, Y/N. You are everything I could possibly want. You make me feel like volleyball isn’t the only thing that matters anymore. I want to hear you sing all the time and I love your hair no matter how you think it looks.”

Your eyes were welling up with tears as he spoke dramatically, looking up at the sky as if that would help him figure out his sentences better. When he finally looked back at you, he jumped back almost immediately in fear.

“N-No! Don’t cry! I’m sorry! I shouldn’t have brought up volleyball again! I-”

You laughed and quickly shook your head, grasping his hands in yours, “Happy tears, Kageyama,” you explained softly, almost immediately burying your face in his chest as you drew him closer for a hug. “Thank you,” you whisper.

Kageyama wasn’t really sure what you were thanking him for but he hugged you tightly anyways. He hated seeing you cry and he would squeeze them all out of you until there was none left if he had to. “You are very pretty.” He stated, pressing a kiss to your head.

And this time, you didn’t argue. You just stayed there in his arms, and listened to the genuineness in his voice.

Haikyuu taglist (let me know if you’d like to join!)

@scphiredrafts @aurumk @devilkittymusic @thisnoodlewritesao3 @satan-ruler-of-hells @trashy-simp @jeppiet @lucyheartfilias-wife @darkvadeeer @haikyuutothetop @wolfishwriting @livy384

#tsukishima x reader #akaashi x reader #kageyama x reader #haikyuu!! #tsukishima x you #akaashi headcanons #kageyama tobio #tsukishima kei #akaashi keiji #tsukishima kei x you #akaashi fluff #akaashi keji x reader #akaashi fanfiction #kageyama x y/n #kageyama x you #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu fluff #haikyu fluff

[nemeseos-noctua]

Hi! Could i request hcs for Diluc and Xiao with a reader who is shy? Thank you!

𝐅𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆: xiao, diluc (separate) x gn!reader

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒: a few swears in diluc’s! (it’s like one or two)

𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄𝐒: this is actually my first tumblr post.... ive been super busy with school, sports, and other stuff. sorry! ill try to write more in the future! (constellations has been doing everything so far since i still dont know how tumblr works lol)

also, these are stupid long... and for what.

adventuring was a lot for you to process

okay, so maybe having your own Benny’s Adventure Team was not great while traveling through Dragonspine and Liyue

too many of everything

you ended up getting really beat up.

after passing through Mingyun Village, you could see Wangshu Inn and decided to stay there until you were healed up

you always found comfort in the night sky, so you went out there every day

It was your fifth night staying at the inn before you saw a short male standing on the balcony where you would usually be. Strange. You’d never seen anyone like that before.

You seemed to have caught him off guard when you started to approach him since he jumped a little. 

Taking a closer look at his face, you studied it a bit. He had golden eyes and dark teal hair that seemed to frame his face perfectly, accompanied by lighter streaks of the same colour.

Pretty... you thought, completely entranced by this strange man (boy?). 

“Ah, sorry. I’m probably disturbing you... I’ll go now...” 

He blinked. 

god he’s in love

not even romantic love but he loved you like the past adepti

xiao would see so many couples over the years that he’s been at the inn and absolutely hated them, but this?? 

okay it’s a different type of love but damn it felt nice

You started to turn and walk back to your room before hearing his voice.

“Stay.” 

STAY??? WE MOVING KINDA FAST BUT ALRIGHT PRETTY BOY !! 

On the outside, you were cooler than a cucumber. The inside? Chaos. Millions of thoughts raced throughout that little head of yours. 

“Only if you’re fine with it...”

Turning back around, you took a few steps forward before noticing that he wore a lot of accessories on him. One of them being a mask that resembled one of the Vigilant Yaksha’s in that one book you read as a kid. Probably just a fan or something.

You reached the balcony, taking a spot next to him while also keeping some space between the two of you. Leaning on the balustrade (the railing of a balcony), you rested your head on top of your arms.

A comfortable silence was placed in the middle of the two. A silent breeze blew, adding to the mellow mood. 

“What brings you here?” the pretty stranger suddenly inquired, gaining a small jolt from your serene state. “Did I scare you? My apologies.”

“Oh, uh, it’s nothing...” You lifted your head to look out at the lands of Dihua Marsh. Seeing Dragonspine in the distance gave you a chill. Those were not the greatest memories. The small movement didn’t go unnoticed by the boy.

“You’re an adventurer?”

“Oh... yeah, I am... I’m not that experienced yet, though...” 

for SOME REASON... this man felt even more inclined to protect you

you still had a fair amount of bandages wrapped around your limbs, so it was clear that you were injured

GOD IF HE COULD JUST HUG YOU RIGHT THERE AND THEN

but he did not.

he has restraint.

he is a good boy.

“I met a traveler that wasn’t very experienced either.” This fact shocked you. So he has been here for a while... but why hadn’t you seen him before? Does he just... disappear into thin air..?

the answer is yes

he does indeed do that

but that’s besides the point.

“Oh... that’s nice...” 

It was getting late. The moon was starting to lower back down and the lids of your eyes were getting heavier and heavier by the minute. You let out a yawn, but it was muffled by your head being buried in your arms once again.

“You should go get some rest.” You hummed. 

Then, a thought popped into your head.

“If you don’t mind me asking... what’s your name?” 

Even though you weren’t facing him, you could feel his piercing gaze on you. It wasn’t uncomfortable at all, but gave you a feeling of protection.

“Xiao.” You mouthed his name to yourself silently. It was nice.

“Goodnight, Xiao. I hope that we can do this again soon.”

“Goodnight to you...”

“(Y/N).”

“...(Y/N).”

you were a cryo catalyst that tried to fight against some cryo slimes alone

hint: that was a bad idea

my favourite elemental reaction was immune!

literally... you couldn’t even do anything to them

and you were getting beat up. 

badly.

for plot convenience you were at the lake next to Dawn Winery

“Shit...” 

At this point, you’d been fending these slimes off for around a quarter of an hour now and you were getting tired now.

Your dumbass tried to drown them in the lake but forgot that they immediately froze any moisture underneath them. You tried attacking them but everything you could do was inflict the freeze effect (against CRYO slimes). 

You literally could not do anything. Time to get frozen to death!

“Burn!”

WHAT???

Suddenly, a big fire bird swept up the slimes that had been occupying you for the last 20 minutes or so, effectively taking them out. 

At this point, the only thing that kept you standing was your adrenaline, which quickly ran out as you dropped to the ground in exhaustion. You let out a sigh, finally free from those damned slimes. You will have your revenge one day... just not today.

While you were resting on the ground, your saviour had been standing there, watching you calm down. And so you looked up to be greeted by probing crimson orbs, which definitely startled you.

Your saviour was.... Master Diluc. Master Diluc Ragnvindr, wealthiest man in Mondstadt. Him. In front of you. 

“OH! I, um, Master Diluc! What brings you here?” 

‘WHAT BRINGS YOU HERE??’ HE LIVES HERE THOUGH?? 

“I was taking a stroll around the winery and happened to see you in your own predicament.”

You attempted to stand up, though your legs failed you as you only flopped back onto the dirt. 

diluc doesn’t wanna admit it but that was unbelievably stupid, cute, and endearing

okay and what if this emo boy doesn’t like people

he still has feelings too >:(

“I’ll stay here with you so you won’t get attacked again. So relax.”

Mans was telling you to “relax” while you were in the presence of a literal typhoon here. He was so brooding and scary-looking all the time that you couldn’t even try to relax.

A few minutes pass and the sound of water rushing was the only thing keeping you two company. 

It was nice to enjoy nature, but the tension between the two of you was still higher than ever.

To break this silence, you had tried to stir up some small talk.

“The weather is nice today, huh...”

He grunted, which seemed to be a regular response of his. You started to notice this after a few questions like “how’s your day been” or “have any plans today?”

Not that you were genuinely interested. You bet that he could tell that you were trying to make it less awkward by responding at all, but it just didn’t help at all.

You were probably sitting for a good 10 minutes before deciding to stand up again, in which you were successful. But could you walk back to the city?

That was debatable.

You definitely felt and looked unstable, so being the gentleman he was raised to be, Diluc reluctantly bent down and slung your shoulder over his.

The height difference between the two of you was pretty big, so he ended up just carrying you to his place. As goofy as it looked, it got the job done.

― riri ✨

#genshin x reader #diluc x reader #xiao x reader #genshin headcanons #genshin imagines #genshin scenarios #genshin #genshin xiao #genshin diluc #genshin impact imagines #genshin impact scenarios #genshin impact headcanons #genshin impact #diluc scenarios #diluc #gi diluc #genshin impact xiao #xiao #ririsann

[staygolddindjarin]

Grief

Chapter two: Rebellion

Din Djarin x Reader x Cassian Andor

Series Summary: Raised on Mandalore, born into a bloodline of warriors, no one ever expected for the daughter of a Clan leader to go rogue. Leaving the life of security and making the journey to fight in the war against the empire meant many things... giving up the way of the Mandalore, and giving up a solid future. A future that involves an arranged marriage to a foundling from another clan.

Chapter warnings: some brief angst, this ones pretty mellow ngl

Words: 3.3k

A/n: i was not expecting such a good response from the first chapter but bruh you guys are amazing- anyway here's part two of my brain's misery

Part 2/?

The trip from Mandalore to the planet of Dantooine was long, and still ongoing. We all took turns, watching to see if we were any closer. After each jump from hyperspace, the transport would stop at a space refueling tank, before slowly going onward toward the destination. We must have been traveling several systems across the galaxy. We had a few laughs, mainly while watching Gander try and steal Shyloh's food from his knapsack while he was sleeping. Most of the other time we all just sat in silence, up until this point.

"What do you think we're all going to do once we get to the rebel base?" Merc raised his voice slightly, barely capturing our attentions as we had all been dozing off, and Shyloh was taking watch at the view point.

"What do you mean?" I had asked, not quite sure of what he was getting at. I sat up straighter against the wall, showing my interest in the newfound conversation.

"What branch do you think you'll end up in?" He was in a daze as he spoke, almost unsure of his intentions of bringing it up. His dark eyes were nearly emotionless under his furrowed brow.

"I hadn't really thought about it. I would say maybe something like mechanics," I said, thinking of the best possible use of my talents. I'm sure there's plenty of mechanical help already assisting the rebels, but with the galactic empire growing it's forces by the day, they needed all the help they could get.

"What about flying?" Shyloh perked up from his seat at the window.

"What about it?" I asked, curious as to why he suddenly thought of the new topic.

"You could do it of you wanted to. Be a pilot, I mean. You have the skills," He told me, but I scoffed. He wasn't in any way shape or form was making an ounce of sense at all.

"Speeder control races are a bit different from piloting fighters against the imperial troops don't you think?" I laughed at the idea, but he rolled his eyes, persistent with his opinion.

"It's less different than you think it is. Also mind you, I never saw you lose a race," He objected, but I wasn't having any of it.

"That's because when I raced, my own credits were on the line," I joked, seeing what he would try and come up with next, only to be met with a cold hard stare, before an answer that would shake me to my core.

"Well, now the freedom of the galaxy is on the line."

My smile dropped from my face and I turned to face the other two, who were looking back at me. They didn't expect that answer either. Shyloh was well known to be a boy of few words, and only really spoke to his friends and family. He was a founding just like the rest of them, but he had been with ths clan longer, due to having been saved from a war infested home as a baby.

He could sometimes be very wise, even if he didn't think he was being so. We weren't sure what it was, but he had this sort of presense that was so powerful. We knew when he would walk in a room, or walk out of it. It's like the air would change. Much like it changed now, with his words rendering us all speechless.

The silence was uncomfortable, and I was the one who left it unresloved, so I spoke up in favor of my crewmates to not keep quiet any longer.

"Perhaps I shall see where I am needed first."

"Perhaps you shouldn't be so afraid to explore an option you would excel in," He again rendered me speechless, and I did not have anything else to say this time. I was young, but my mind was not. I could comprehend thoughts the same way that an adult could. I could handle things just as well and if not better than some, too. He was right. I was simply afraid.

"I think we're finally here," Shyloh said, turning back to look out of the view port again.

"Its about time," Gander stood up, slinging his knapsack over his shoulder and standing at the transport door waiting for it to slide up.

We all followed suit, but Shyloh stopped us and held up a warning finger to stay still.

"There's manding droids, we gotta sneak off carefully. They don't look like bulk but they could be armed," He suggested. We were not yet at the rebel base, meaning these were probably droids of the land, and belonged to whoever oversees the exports on this planet.

When the panel opened, we were all careful to first peek out of the transport. This planet was nothing at all like Mandalore, which was dry and hot. This planet was lush with plants. And the air was slightly humid. It was a very welcome contrast from where I spent most of my life.

We all sneakily bolted out of the transport, ducking down behind one of the cargo units placed outside. We saw an opening in what looked like some sort of forrest patch.

There was a chill in the air on this planet, even in the middle of the day. Mandalore only ever got colder at night, when the sun was down and the moons were shining.

"That was close." Merc mumbled as we began to turn around and head into the grasslands, trying to find the rebel base.

We made sure no one was behind us, and were careful to check if any droids had caught sight of us.

We all went to turn around, but as soon as I did, I collided with someone's chest, rather hard might I add, sending me to the ground on my bottom. I didn't even collide that hard with the person, it was just the shock that sent me backwards.

"Need a hand?" I looked up to see a man, a sly smirk on his face as he held his hand out towards me. I took it without question, heaving myself up from the grassy, and somewhat muddy ground beneath me.

"You must be our contact," Merc smiled, and the man nodded, turning and begining to lead us to a speader that was hovering nearby behind a large set of trees.

"We must be careful not to use names outside of the base. I would be more than happy to formally introduce myself once we reach our final destination," He chuckled. It was only now that I realized he had an accent, a thick one. Probably left over from his native tongue that spilled out his mouth when he spoke galactic basic.

I know that sometimes my accent slips in when i speak. I never had to worry about using Mando'a around my fellow crewmates. They were foundlings, and hadn't been raised to speak it. Shyloh was, but he prefered to use galactic basic anyways because he had forgotten so much of it.

We all boarded the speader, Gander and I sitting on the back, our legs hanging off as we held onto the side bars.

"This might be a bumpy ride for you two," The man said, looking at both of us before giving me a wink. I scrunched my face up, not sure how else to react to it. The man was definitely on the younger side, but I wasn't sure how he could possibly see an interest in me.

Maybe he did and I just didn't want him to. Maybe I was still hinged to the idea that I would go back to Mandalore someday and marry my betrothed. I was so young, and hadn't the slightest idea of what feelings I could possibly be harboring, if any at all.

I couldn't deny I found him appealing. Anyone would, at least any human with eyes that is.

His hair was dark, and so were his eyes. He had a bit of stubble along his jaw and above his lip. He was somewhat scruffy looking, but in a good way.

As the speeder went through the forresty stretch of pathway, I kept turning around to catch a glimpse of him. Each time I did I had to look away fast because Gander would give me weird stares.

I would play it off like I was simply taking in the view of the green planet around me, and he wouldn't seem to notice.

After a while, with quite a few twists and turns, and Gander and I nearly falling off the speeder twice, we arrived to our destination.

We all hopped out of the transport, following the man into a giant cargo port. As soon as I looked to my left I could see an X-wing fighter in all it's glory. I had never seen a real one before, just heard stories and viewed holograms.

"Alright. We have about twelve other recruits arriving on this base today, so you will all be attending orientation this evening. As for right now, you look beat, and should rest. PX-74 will assign you to your bunks," He said, gesturing to the droid before beginning to walk away with a nod, but I stopped him before he could take a step.

"Wait a minute... I believe I recall something about a formal introduction," I crossed my arms over my chest and shifted my weight, trying to give off the look of having as much confidence as I could muster. I was putting on a facade, possibly to make me seem more mature. I didn't know the real reason.

He smirked, raising an eyebrow as he scanned me up and down with his dark eyes.

"Cassian Andor," He smiled, then looking right back at me with questioning eyes. "And how about you... you got a name?"

"Y/n from clan Maldrix," I said, my confidence wavering a little when he looked at me the way that he did.

"She's a Mandalorian," Shyloh perked up, and I sent him a warning glare.

"Yeah, sixth generation," Merc added, his cocky smile pasted on his face for all to see and be annoyed by.

"A mandalorian? I've heard the stories but I haven't ever met one. Are you-?"

"I'm not," I cut him off before this got twisted into one big lie. "My mother and father are."

"Doesn't that make you one too?" Cassian furrowed his brow but his tone was somewhat joking and humorous.

"No, it does not," I wasn't harsh with the way my voice came out, but I was firm. Though I wasn't one of them, the mandalorians and all they stood for were very important to me.

"Mandalorian is not a race, it's a creed. Some of the best Mandalorians I ever had the pleasure of knowing didn't even have a bloodline from Mandalore. They were foundlings, like these three," I explained, laying out the facts so that there was no longer any confusion lingering, but now there was a tension that was thicker than the trees on this planet.

"Even still, she can fight just as good as any soldier taken the creed," Merc jumped in, trying to clear the air, and thankfully, it seemed to be working.

"She flies even better," Shyloh mentioned, and I swore I could kill him. He was just so pushy sometimes, even with his massive sense of wisdom.

"You fly?" This peaked Andor's interest, and immediately he seemed more engaged towards me.

"I'm not as good as they say I am," I admitted, but he shook his head.

"No, really... if you can fly we could really use you. We're putting together a team for an air raid that's set to happen about one month's time from now," He came up closer to me and stared me in the eye.

"I'm just a kid, I might really let you down," I joked, trying not to get too caught up in his eye contact. His eyes were much darker when you could see them closely.

"I tell you what, I can arrange for you to have time in the flight simulator after orientation. If we feel you would be an asset, we can add you to the strike team," He said, nodding along to his words. I understood that they might need backup, and if push came to shove, I could maneuver faster than any pilot back on Mandalore. I never lost a race, nor did I ever lose a bet.

"Okay."

I could tell I was blushing from the extra attention I was receiving. I wasn't so sure what about me was so enticing that I deserved it.

"I have to go now to pick up the other recruits from a drop station. I leave you in the capable hands of PX-74," He said, returning to his speeder and letting us be lead off into the base.

"There are only so many open bunks left. Two of you will share one, and the other two will be placed with bunk mates." The metalized voice of the PX unit was strong in our ears, and we all followed after him as we ventured into the long hallway at the end of the cargo port.

The droid stopped at a door about midway through the hall and opened it using the side panel on the wall, revealing a young man that seemed almost younger than me even.

"One of you will be staying here. Which will it be?" The droid asked, turning towards our small group.

"I'll take this one," Shyloh said, stepping forward into the bunk to meet his new roomate.

The boy looked a bit frightened at first, but because of Shyloh's powerful yet calming energy, he seemed to relax almost immediately.

He turned and smiled back at us, waving before the IG unit closed the door and kept us going.

He walked us down passed several more doors, maybe more than twenty, before he stopped at another one and opened it up.

Inside sat a young woman, her legs crossed as she sharpened a knife with a smirk on her face. She looked up and made eye contact with me first.

"I wondered how long it would be before they got someone else in here." Her voice was somewhat low and raspy, but it was kind of soothing in a way.

"One of you-" the IG unit began again, but I stopped him, stepping into the bunk with the girl inside.

"I'll take this one." I smiled at the two boys left before the door closed on my new bunk.

I moved to set my knapsack down on the bottom bunk, but my roomate stopped me.

"Bottom one's mine." She said, looking up from her sharpened knife again to inform me of the sleeping arrangements.

I instead threw my knapsack on the top bunk, trying to climb up into it, but failing miserably.

"You need a hand?" She chuckled, watching my lame attempts to swing my leg up high enough. The fact that there was no ladder should have tipped me off.

"I'll be okay, thanks," I laughed, keeping my attitude loose and positive, though this bunk bed was already causing unnecessary problems for me.

"If you say so," She chuckled again, seeing as I finally managed to haul myself up and onto the bed.

"First try," I joked, and she laughed like it was the funniest thing in the world. I think that we would be getting along, because no one ever laughed at my lame sense of humor.

I laid back, resting my arms behind my head and staring blankly at the ceiling.

"So, where are you from?" She piped up, not taking her eyes away from her previous knife. That thing must mean a lot to her.

"Mandalore," I let out, trying to get comfortable on this lumpy pad that was under my head.

"Actually?" She seemed surprised. Everyone had heard of the planet that the mandalorian tribes had resided upon, and usually they understood what kind of people the place would breed.

"Yeah. Left just in time. Tomorrow's my birthday," I shut my eyes continuing our converastion with one less sense. It didn't matter, though. I was still fully awake.

"What would you have had to do?" She pondered curiously, finally looking up towards the bunk in interest.

"Well, to put it short... tomorrow I would have had to swear my freedom away. No living being would ever be able to see my face again till the day I died," I laid it out plain and simple, and she seemed to understand.

"How old are you?" She asked, her trail of questions getting longer and longer.

"Sixteen tomorrow," I answered, feeling a bit more tired now that my eyes had been closed, and the lights in the bunk rooms were dim.

"You're just a baby," She scoffed. "How could they possibly expect you to make that choice so young?"

"It's just the way it's always been there. This is the way," I remembered. Those words used to be said to me nearly ten times a day, and now they only rung in my mind as a memory.

"That's insane. The people on your planet must be crazy to take an oath like that," She muttered.

"You would think so... the strangest part about it is that there are kids brought back as foundlings that take the creed without hesitation. They don't even belong to a bloodline, they just feel as though they have right to the creed as much as anyone else," I silently remembered Din for a moment. He was the bravest, strongest, most loyal Mandalorian I'd ever known. A foundling.

I began to get bitter at the thought of leaving him. He could have made things better for me if I had just given him a chance. I had to let my head get in the way. I needed to think about something else.

"What about you, huh? Where you from?" I asked, changing the subject as quickly and painlessly as possible.

"Alderaan. Born and raised," She said, getting up from the floor and dropping herself on the bottom bunk.

"You been a lot of places since then?" I asked, but she first let out a heavy sigh before speaking.

"Only too many to count," She said, settling herself on the bunk like I had done.

"Must be nice..." I muttered. Finally able to relax on this pathetic excuse for a bed pad. Of course I couldn't complain. I'm the one who chose the life of the rebellion, including their miserable bedding. "I've never been anywhere outside my home planet until now. I haven't even seen the entirety of my own planet."

"Most new comers are the same. They haven't been anywhere else, then they come here and its like we're moving non stop. Base to base, on just about every planet in this galaxy," She reassured. At least now I didn't feel so out of place.

"How long have you been stationed here?" I asked, unsure of how long I would get to adjust to things.

"A few months. It's likely we'll have to leave soon. There's rumors of the imperials knowing our location," She answered, rolling her eyes, thought I couldn't see from the top bunk.

"You're kidding," I scoffed. After just getting here, I might have to up and leave again. I'll have to learn to accept this new life, it's what I wanted.

"I wish I was, kid," She added.

"I have a name," I retorted back, not a fan of the nickname 'kid'. I waited for her to ask me what it was, but when she stayed silent I sighed. "It's Y/n."

"I'll call you what you are... now get some rest, they'll come pounding on that door in a few hours for orientation," She said, as though she somehow had grown to a habit of mothering me only five minutes after we met. I dropped the conversation and drifted off to sleep, my eyes were too heavy to keep open anymore anyway.

.

.

Tags open

A/n: okay so like i wrote this a while before everything with gina carano happened and i do not in any way condone her whatsoever so let's pretend she's been recast already...

#din dijarin x reader #din djarin #din djarin smut #din djarin imagine #din djarin fic #reader insert #din djarin x jedi!reader #din djarin x oc #the mandolorian x reader #the mandalorian #mando x you #the mandalorion spoilers #siege of mandalore #cara dune #pedro pascal #pedro pascal x reader #cassian andor #cassian andor x reader