#i wish i could explain it LMAO.

[ardberts]

dress-up estinien | [ 02 / ?? ]

#ffxiv #final fantasy xiv #estinien #estinien wyrmblood #estinien varlineau #gpose #gposers #pose credit: venu @ xma #prop credit: sleepykitten93 @ xma #my edits #edits: dress-up estinien #i have had this image in my head of estinien with a bat for such a long time... #i wish i could explain it LMAO. #also i'm really proud of this?? #i feel like i'm slowly understanding how to gpose better #next step is posing from scratch on my own. #also estinien in street clothes???? #you agree.

[pineappical]

I always thought is very tricky to draw that wrinkle that goes from the nose and around the mouth and still male it look good, but gosh you nail it in every art, super expressive and pretty. Looking at all your drawings 🔍🕵‍♀️ to properly appreciate and study it. But wow really in love with your art style is so expressive and pleasing to look at, and the colors are so pretty 👌👌👌👌

i LOVEEE drawing wrinkles!!! it makes faces soso so expressive and i try to add wrinkles to every character i draw whenever i can. and the fact i also love drawing characters smiling (they make me happy, so i want to be able to share my joy to other people by drawing them smiling too!) which of course makes that wrinkle around the nose and mouth more prominent :-)

im not a person that can draw well from memory, i use references excessively even if it doesnt turn out the same way from the reference im copying from in the end 😊

i drew these out real quick but i have no clue how to explain any of these so i just thought about sharing it with you anyways!

call it "cheating" or whatever, but most of the time i even trace over the reference just to have a base i can copy the expression im trying to draw from. i do art for fun and if it makes my process that much easier then. well!

anyhoo, ignore the fact these are all mr lassos... i just love him a whole bunch 💛

#im not saying 'tracing is good!' as a whole. never trace from other people's work and pass it off as your own obviously. i just think you - #can learn a whole bunch of tricks and how to draw specific things if you just Trace Over References #'ohh but youll never Get Good by just tracing though! :/' who cares. i love drawing men being silly and thats enough for me. #Getting Good be damned! #apologies if this doesnt make any damn sense LMAO !! i just got home a couple hours ago and its now 3am zzzz #pn.ask #theres also the matter of me being obsessed with handlebar facial hairs and how it 'removes' the upper lip when im drawing so i use the - #bottom part of the mustache as the line for the mouth itself #ITS THIS WHOLE PROCESS.... IDK!!!! wish i could explain it any better but i am. so bad at writing down my thoughts. why cant i just beam - #them directly into your mind smh #THANK YOU FOR THIS ASK THOUGHHHH i waited till i got home before answering it because i have some stuff i wanted to say

[aroaessidhe]

2023 reads

What Stalks Among Us

YA thriller

two best friends skip a field trip to explore some old forgotten backroads - and get trapped in a looping corn maze full of weird shit, including their own dead bodies

they have to figure out how to get out, what’s killing them, what’s causing the maze, and face their traumas

fat girl MC with anxiety, both are bi and have ADHD, no romance

#What Stalks Among Us #aroaessidhe 2023 reads #sarah hollowell #wait i just noticed it's them on her shirt on the cover... #i enjoyed this a lot! #it really immediately gets into it huh. not any build up. but in hindsight that makes sense #it gets a little repetitive in places but it works and I love how it all tied together #no romance #(it DOES explore past abusive relationships as a theme but very much just the effects of healing from that rather than showing #much of the actual relationships) #I really love how it emphasised how important their friendship is without there even being a question of it being romantic #(but also exploring that a bit re: the side character stuff in a way that I think is great) #it does make references and then explain them a lot (though also i get that could be an adhd thing with ur mind going on a tangent) #she even is like man i wish my brain would stop making all these pop culture references! #that plus a few other aspects of the writing felt a bit unsubtle - but also it is YA its allowed to be #that and a few other aspects of the writing felt a bit unsubtle - but also it is YA its allowed to be #also some of the references made me laugh LMAO. including: #'remember when you thought the maze followed crossroad rules from supernatural. do you think the maze knows about super hell' #i cannot fault someone for saying heckin wimdy because I sure do that. well not 'heckin' but #anyway felt like realistic teens #bisexual books

[zodiacsea]

actually obsessed with the way astarion & halsin handled the whole negotiating romancing them both. chef’s kiss

#bg3 spoilers #question mark? idk i feel like it’s a known thing that u can romance them both ur #but* #hilarious to say this abt any astarion interaction but it was kind of wholesome LMAO #extrenely obsessed with the fact that i was allowed to just have tav be polyam and no one got jealous. AND i didn’t have to like. #explain the concept to these characters. #also astarion’s line when u first ask him abt it? chef’s kiss. so cute actually. #hysterically i don’t rly think my tav and halsin would be a great fit romantically but i’m doing it anyway LMAO #i deeply wish u could be polyam with the other origin companions. bc in my heart they are lol #漫言 #baldurs gay 3 lol

[lavenderjewels]

I appreciate the love for Shoko but all the theories about her somehow resurrecting gojo from death is really setting her up for disappointment

#imo them collecting the body can just be a sentimental choice too not a major plot changer #shoko bringing him to life when barely any chapters have passed without him and without any indication of her having that ability would #be a very cheap move lmao #i still don’t think he’ll come back at all but if he did I’d want it mostly to be His choice. then Shoko could fix him up after #but yeah next chapter will likely be something horrific or sad #it is NOT looking good for yuuta and rika #I don’t want yuuta to die—at least not until there’s a semblance of hope for the protags #gotta balance out the misery with some hope and effort #buuuuut rika??? could see her being destroyed easily next chapter #….and maybe yuuta too. someone important might get eaten soon #jjk spoilers #wanna say that I DO think Shoko will be healing and helping though!!! #just not gojo for next chapter 🤨 part of me wishes higuruma isn’t dead tbh #look if it’s executed AMAZINGLY and thoroughly explained without making it a shocking fake out death—then sure Gojo returnings fine #jjk 248

[hershey-the-person]

i have two moods :😔 crippling depression and anxiety making it hard to stay alive 😔

and ✨️pop icon in the bathroom✨️

#honestly i think im funny when i want to be with the people i want it to be #and honestly not many people get to see that side cuz it just takes away from this mysterious and quiet persona i have #but once i let u in baby the jokes never stopping #well they stop when im having an existential crisis but lets not count thay #actually i make jokes even when i feel like dying lmao #so um yeah #i wish i had friends whom i could make jokes with #but the problem is people dont understand my humor cuz they dont about the topic im talking about #but like here on tumblr say if i make jokes about some character people do get it #my fandoms dont match with otherss irl #actually most of my irl friends are not into any actual fandoms 💀 #given i dont have many irl #people whom i actually talk to ? not more than 2-3 id say #i do have more friends but like i dont TALK talk with them iykwim #and tbh i dont really need too many friends im fine with what i have cuz thats amazing #more people u let in = higher chance of becoming toxic + more heartbreak + more energy drainage + start losing urself to please others + #more back bitching + bejng asked to give more explanation when u have ur kms times and u disappear for a while #and when u dont explain they get mad or u get tired and just cut them off #lmao im rambling all my problems in just one post oops

[todayisafridaynight]

[General fic with undertones of Masadai, very-minutely implied past Minedai. Ryo Aoki, Daigo Dojima]

[POST-YAKUZA 4] Daigo always knew running the Tojo Clan would never be easy, it's why he made every attempt to dodge such a responsibility. With the latest disaster only now starting to fade from Kamurocho's memory, the inadequacy he felt only exemplified: he should have never been given this position. For years, the men he was supposed to look after had discouraged his election, dubbing him too immature and naive to run the Clan. It was hard to find anyone to understand him- it was hard to find any breath of fresh air in such a suffocating ocean of discord, leaving him to wonder if there was any point to continuing down this path. Though, once he realized the buoy of his woes took the form of his troublesome ex, perhaps he would have preferred to just drown in the murky water. Instead, he was left with the unfortunate reality that Ryo Aoki had a remarkable way with words and making him feel understood. He would struggle to remember it was never a good thing when Aoki was playing nice...

#rgg #ryu ga gotoku #ryu ga gotoku 4 #ryu ga gotoku 7 #yakuza series #yakuza 4 #yakuza 7 #yakuza like a dragon #daigo dojima #ryo aoki #masato arakawa #masadai #snap scribes #CRINGE TIME #fic titles that make me want to listen to given up by linkin park #ive had this thing hoarded for months and ive decided to release it into the world in hopes i inspire other people to be insane #ive just been thinking of this concept for months cause its RIGHT THERE... i just wish i could better execute it #but again i wanna at least put the idea out there so hopefully someone else thinks im onto something LOL #i think i made daigo too pathetic in this but then i remember he's STILL bummed out in y5 so. i think its vaguely ok #sorry the blurb is long as hell and this fic is really wordy. i have to explain why im insane LMAO #anyway im never posting another masadai fic again dont look at me #ok bye im gonna go draw #or i should eat first wait LMAO idk we'll see what i decide to do #i have an addiction to content creation

[the-yearning-astronaut]

.

#tbd #☉ #lemme start by prefacing this with I KNOW there's no real normal way to be human #ok i get that #but fucking HELL I wish i was normal #i wish my health was normal for my age #i wish i wasn't fucking. neurodivergent #im fine with being queer but ffs why am i in between normal queer and accepted Aroace-ness #why am i abnormal in that regard too #i wish I didn't alienate people i wish i didn't have to explain why im extra quiet and moody and minutes from a meltdown #i wish my hands and feet wouldn't swell up and hurt and burn and I wish i could take a fucking shower without feeling dread #because i had the water temp set to hot and now im dizzy and my heart is racing and im overheating -- alternatively I wish #i didn't feel so self conscious because i DONT shower every day or even every other day like i dont like when my hair goes limp either! #and i use deodorant everyday and wipe off when i can but i have fuckin Let's Sweat Buckets For No Reason Disorder so i always look and feel #like a drowned rat. im tired of being tired but not being able to sleep. im tired of not being able to explain that yes its really not you #its me. me wanting to be alone has nothing to do with you ok its my brain deciding to fuckin shut down because everything is too much rn #& idk how to tell you that im at my wits end but if you treat me with kidd gloves i WILL go off like a fuckin bomb. just treat me NORMAL ffs #just treat me normal 😭 i just want to be normal. i want to be able to sit down and just do my application stuff instead of #staring at a blank document for weeks and then wanting to throw things as the deadline approaches ( #its due friday and i have absolutely nothing written lmao) and idk if its executive dysfunction or anxiety or my tendancey to self sabotage #but either way im so fuckin fucked. im NOT in the headspace rn for writing a graduate school application letter. #trying hard not to cry rn bcs my friend and her parents are sleeping already bcs they have a 9-5 sleeping schedule to fit their 9-5 jobs #like i dont even have a normal sleeping schedule lmao mine's 2-10. i just don't understand why im so broken or whatever. not normal. #& i feel bad for bitching about it all bcs objectively i have a pretty decent life. i have a home i have food i have a family that loves me #im just back to feeling like im too much and also not enough and im so fuckin lonely. im tired of feeling lonely. and i think #ive got a platonic crush or two. or something. and idk how to handle that anymore. if i ever did. #idk idk i feel like im back to looking at the world and passersby through frosted glass again.

[thecherrygod]

/

#my posts #........................................................................................................................................... #............................................................................................................................................ #is that enough i think that's enough #yeah that's how its going #everything's been getting worse and I've been feeling very bad but also very pathetic and like complaining almost makes me feel worse but #i can't do anything else about this so like. vent post lmao bc I'm a dumbass #i truly just want to(redacted)but one of those isn't an option and the other i have a drs appointment soon and i don't want to explain that #everything is just. bad. and what isn't i feel like it's getting bad and it's my fault. and I'm probably right. #just. i hate it here #the deserving mentality is truly getting to me and i fucking hate it. it's not logical. I'll still agree with it. #i truly don't deserve the food stuff i can't keep in my life and i deserve the shit that in getting and i can't stop agreeing with that #'oh this classmate wants to have lunch with me on Saturday after working on something! i should cancel before it's too late- #-so i can continue feeling bad for being an apple bc people should hate me bc I'm horrible and don't deserve kindness' like #it's. it's false. it's not logical. and yet #everyone else there's the fucking plexiglass wall and where it wasn't i think it's getting formed and it is my fault probably #i am annoying that one is true #.... I've been making posts like this all day and deleting them bc I'm pathetic also. it's. #... there's a little too much going on lmao #nothing's worth it and i feel like shit and anything i could try to do about it doesn't work and I'm just tired #... in case someone does read this i know it sounds worrying but nothing will happen tbh I'm just a pathetic coward who's sad and tired #and tired of being sad in a way that feels like it's getting worse #I'm not very sure when was the last time i felt. this bad in just. i don't know how to make it stop lmao #also in already annoying so this is all i can do i think lmao #i think I'm seeing now I'm just. being redundant and if i keep this up too much i will delete this. and i should but. i don't think i will #also without saying much this year the one thing™ has been worse than usual and that's not helping either so it truly is just. #that everything is kinda very bad #.... yeah. whatever. it's just.¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯ #... i truly wish killing myself was still an option like when i was a teen bit it's not so i just have to deal with whatever this is #... i hate being aware this is all super illogical bc the logical post of my brain teams up making me feel worse somehow.

[deadsh33p]

I genuinely believe IDW and Rise Mikey s are the best versions of the character. They feel much more than just comic relief.

#i enjoy 2012 btw! no hate. but somtimes he acts a way... makes me so mad #havent watched much of 2003 (planning to tho) but i think he's still better than 2012?? #though what theyre missing is empathy. i think. #IDW and Rise makes mikey so SO much more of a cinnamon roll without making it feel forced #ily IDW mikey #i love him because he cares so much he is such a good guy #same with Rise mikey!! #also ik 2003 and 2012 are old shows so this doesnt count as critic but... the way Mikey talks in these shows LMAO #same with the masterpiece that Batman vs TMNT unironically is #OMG THE WAY HE TALKS UGHHH SHY DOES HE TALK LIKE THAG #i mean ig thwre are teenagers that talk like this but ive NEVER SEEN ONE #i cant explain how he talks but i think you guys know what i mean #like the🤙🤙DUUDE WHA🧍👉👋✌way lmao #idk he sounds so dumb wished i could STRANGLE him

[gojoest]

back from the dentist and sadly i will have to go back idk how many times again bc things are bad and ai is very sad 🥹

#— ai rambles #apparently the surgery 2 years ago did not do me any good #so much of the bone is gone i will kms #sorry i rly don’t know any dental or medical terms i wish i could explain but i barely get it in my native language lmao #but yea the horrors are starting 🥹 idk if i can go through this again hahaha #not when even my fave is dead 🥹

[hauntingblue]

NAMI NEEDS TO GO UP THERE AND FIGHT BIG MOM I AM SO SERIOUS!!! THIS IS A BATTLE FOR THE ROMANCE DOWN TRIO!! SANJI DO NOT DARE TAKE HER SPOT!!!

#big mom just giving birth here on the battlefield..... #do i comment on the incestuous relationship between clouds made of the same soul??? no?? okay... #oh jesus.... goodbye kid and killer.... nami needs to get up there and take control of zeus and i am so serious #HER SKILL IS SO POWERFUL AND SO PERFECT FOR THIS FIGHT AGAINST BIG MOM BUT BECAUSE SHE IS NOT PART OF THE STRONG TRIO SHE GETS STUCK WITH #THE B LIST VILLAINS!!!! LKKE WHY DOES SHE NEED TO FIGHT ULTI?? OKAY THAT WAS MEANINGFUL BUT THAT COULD END THERE!!!! #SANJI GO FIGHT PAGE ONE!!! SOMEONE TAKE CARE OF ULTI AND LET LUFFY ZORO AND NAMI TAKE CARE OF KAIDO AND BIG MOM!!! I AM SERIOUS!!! #big mom is inside the castle.... maybe i will get my wish granted (kinda...) #kid and nami against big mom.... maybe sanji can join... i can see it so clearly.... come on now..... #if namo knew armor haki she would have gone up there and taken zeus and dealt with prometheus and his sister wife. let the others w/ big mom #fucking hawkins... end him killer.... calling him domesticated lmao... end his pathetic ass #using conqueror's haki on the weapons..... also zoro having it too.... the flower petals symbolism..... OHHHHHHHHH #nani indeed...... BREAK THAT MACE!!!! YEAAHHH!!!! law is completely baffled #KAIDO GOT SENT BACK!!!! LETSGOOOOO AND THE OG INTRO MUSIC QUICKS IN!!!! law just saw god again.... #he said fuck off i got this.... omg.... he is either gonna nearly die and doesn't want them to follow or doesn't want to worry about them #while he fights and they try to defend him.... no other explaination (apart for 4 the plot reasons) #talking tag #watching one piece #episode 1028 #luffy king of everything that was such a slay #they changed luffy chiquito's design.... #i was gonna say luffy swimming...... but he can't yet akdhajsj #yasopp taking care of everyones children but his own...... i see how it is.... #WHY WOULD SHANKS STAY IN GOA IF NOT TO TALK WITH GARP WHO LIVES THERE!!! I AM TELLING YOU SHANKS IS IN KAHOOTS WITH THE MARINES!!!! #i was thinking about shanks scar... and thought it might be from buggy with his three knives in between his fingers you know #but it is too small... like the knives would take more space.... but maybei might be reaching and it is from buggy and not like a little paw #or little hand.... however much distrubing you want to paint it.... #shanks is testing little luffy's intelligence... he knows his weak spot already akdhjasj #uta calling herself a diva.... ajshaksn might this be the reason luffy was so inclined to having a musician since the start??? #episode 1029 #that was like a perfectly realistic relationship between an older smartass girl and a younger boy lmao it was spot on

[hualian]

anyway I got my first tattoo (!!!) and you just KNOW I had to incorporate a butterfly into the design to honor both hualian and Hua Cheng 🦋💖

#look when I say tgcf and hualian mean a lot to me #I mean they mean enough to me to have it on myself for the rest of my life enough to me #this was years in the making but I finally did it !!! #I'm not posting the full design because it's very personal to me and a very close friend designed it but #this is the best part of the entire tattoo #getting my traditional south african desi parents to accept this was WILD lmao but we move 🤡 #anyway. i really do love hualian and tgcf a lot 😭😭😭🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋 #macy speaks #I'm OBSESSED like I wish I could explain how much this means to me and what an accumulation of my life this is

[lavb-b]

Me, Myself, and I

Actually based on that one post I saw theorising abt his blue , red and purple aura corresponding to Mob's self I forgot where I got it tho :')

#I srsly wish i could explain it better im srry lmao #WhenTheMoReallyGoesPsycho100 #mp100 #mob shigeo #mob psycho 100 #Im also just reposting old art here bc im still in the middle of exams and i cant draw for the time being teehee

[jonny-b-meowborn]

I am genuinely so terrified of the fact that I have to find a job now. I'm trying to think of or look up a job that's suitable for my mentally ill autistic ass and I just. I don't know. Everything either requires some very specific qualifications that I don't have, or seems at best awfully exhausting, at worst literally putting me in danger. And I'm not even exaggerating, I genuinely think that working in retail, for example, could possibly kill me if I was forced to do that job for long enough. I sometimes get overwhelmed to the point of crying when there's too many other customers while I'm shopping, I can't imagine working in an environment like that. I suppose physical jobs could work, I've been to this blueberry plantation twice last week and mentally I was fine, but it was. So tiring. And you don't even make that much money a day, I don't think I could earn enough even if I did work there everyday, not to mention it's only a seasonal job. Right now it's fine for me to go there every now and then, but if I wanted to move out and become independent I'd have to get an actual day job. And that sounds impossible. The only job that sounds good to me is being an artist, it's not too mentally or physically difficult, and it's something I enjoy. But I'd have to get commissions constantly or start a small business or something like that to actually survive. And I'm not saying it's impossible, I know that people can live by being an artist, but it's so hard to get into that field. I wish I could do it but I dont know if it's possible for me. Makes me wanna cry. I hate this I hate that my brain isn't suited for this world and still I have to participate in all that shit that everyone has to do. My brain isn't made for working like that

#I've talked about this a lot with my sister who is also autistic #and were both like. on a similar level of autism i dont know how to properly explain it #were functioning in similar ways i guess #and we both agreed that we're in this awkward spot of being autistic #where we're not suited for living in this world the way we're expected #but we're good enough at surviving that we can't really ask for help #like from the government or smth #im not sure if im making sense #but like neither of us ever had a normal job for longer than a few days #she's incredibly lucky bc her boyfriend (also autistic lol) has rich parents #so he's able to have a small business where hes making youtube content and games and merch #and he gets financial support from his parents. so he can have the job he feels comfortable with and enjoys #and my sister is now able to work with him. theyre both making their silly little games and trinkets and are able to live normally #which is just so great for her i love that. im also so jealous lmao #and then theres me who also is made for creating art and not much else but im not lucky enough to be able to do that and survive #idk. my mom is great and doesn't put too much pressure on me. she was the one to take me to that blueberry job #and she really supprts my plans to be an artist full time #but still. thats really difficult to do. ugh #sometimes i wish that i either wasnt autistic at all or was 'less functioning' so at least i could get some help with living #bee buzz

[unforth]

"It's because you're kinda like a mom...kinda like a dad-mom," my daughter, explaining why she's telling me what she got me for mother's day.

I really wish I understood my gender as well as she does. 🤣 like I haven't even tried to explain to my kids that I'm genderfluid, I might as well be cis as far as they know, yet somehow they just get it anyway.

#unforth rambles #her concept of gender is god tier lmao #i wish she could explain it to me cause she sure gets it better than i do