#i'll hit a motherfucker with another motherfucker

[remadra]

Birds were meant to fly

#little nightmares 3 #little nightmares low #little nightmares alone #my art #i'll hit a motherfucker with another motherfucker #already hcing alone as being really strong because i think this would be hilarious. is it too late to add this as a mechanic to bridge gaps

[l-michalska-writer]

🗡️Protective prompts

Can I kill him now?

He deserves to die after what he did to you. And I’ll bring it to him.

He doesn’t even deserve to be breathing the same air you are.

I wanna know as soon as he does anything that makes you uncomfortable.

I’ll deal with him.

I'm not going anywhere.

I want you to go to me any time he does something that freaks you out.

She's my date. Fuck off.

Why was he talking to you?

Did he want something from you?

You won't go anywhere with him.

He touches you again and I won't guarantee you I won't kill him immediately.

He said what to you?!

You go near him ever again and I'll kill him.

Is he just a friend?!

I looked everywhere for you.

I'm yours, you're mine. I don't intend on ever changing that.

You're mine. There's no changing that.

She's mine. Get lost.

You're mine. But I'm yours too. You don't have to worry about me not being loyal. There's only one woman I could ever want in my bed and that's you.

Baby, am I your first?

I hate the thought of other men touching you before me.

Just say a word and I'll kill him.

Was it your first time?

One your word and I'll take you from here.

I love the fact that I was your first.

You'll stay with me. Where you're safe and near me.

You're worried about me sleeping with other women? I don't want anyone else but you. That means I won't sleep with anyone else but you.

I won't hear another word.

He won't hurt you again, I promise.

Whether you like it or not, you're safest with me.

I don't care what you think. I won't let you come back to that motherfucker.

Yeah, I killed him! He used to hit you! What did you expect me to do?! Leave him alone?

I won't let him come near you.

I won't let you saty here. Not when you're so close to him.

#protective #fanfiction prompts #my prompts #protective prompts #morally gray prompts #writers and poets #writerslife #writing prompt #dialogue prompt #prompt list #angst prompts #writing prompts #writing ideas

[talaok]

I can save myself

Pairing: Joel Miller x Fem! reader

Summary: Joel comes to your rescue once more, and for some reason, for as many times as you tell him, he doesn't seem to get the message you don't need to be saved.

warnings: age gap(reader is legal), smut(unprotected penetrative sex, some degradation, but also some praising) and violence.

"FUCK YOU!" 

He threw another punch at you, his tight knuckles inches from hitting your face before you dodged it crouching down, making him hit the brick wall instead.

Bet that hurts motherfucker

As the opportunity presented itself, your face so very close to his precious crotch, you took advantage of his distraction as he winced in pain, and deciding to give him a taste of his own medicine, you threw a punch right between his legs.

"FUCKING BITCH!" he yelled, stumbling back

"right back at ya" you chuckled, leaning on the wall to struggle back up on your feet "what?" you smirked, mocking him "was that all you got?" you laughed softly "because that's pretty lame if you ask me"

"oh you think you're funny?" he asked, his jaw clenching as he took a threatening step toward you

"we'll see what you'll think when I'm done with you," he said "you little bitch" he spat out as he bolted in front of you and his quick hands grabbed your shirt.

Now,

that might have been a stupid decision,

but it's not like you were ever known for making good ones.

"Aw you’re mad” you cooed, trying to not let your heavy breathing come off as fear “you just got owned by a girl and now you’re ego is hurt?” You asked with a smug pout, trying to distract him as your left hand reached into your back pocket for your switchblade “is that it?”

“Do you always talk this much?”

You smiled amusedly, the cut on your lip hurting as you did “I’ve been told before”

“Let’s see if you’ll still want to with a dislocated jaw,” he said, his piercing eyes angry, as his hold got tighter on your shirt, and his fist came up threateningly.

You reached for the knife, but just as your fingers touched the metal, your head swang to the side, his knuckles hitting your cheek.

Well fuck,

He didn’t have to punch you that hard.

“That’s what I thought” he spat out,

You looked at him, the chunk of dark-gelled hair on his forehead, the wrinkles around his eyes, the eerie grimace on his lips, and you couldn’t help but laugh.

“What? You need another one?”

“Depends,” you said, “can you even throw another one?”

"you really need to learn when to shut up," he said through gritted teeth, his hand gripping your shirt once more

"I'll keep that in mind" your hand reached for the blade again, and his fist came up once more.

You gripped the handle, your hand tight around the hardwood as you finally slipped it out of your pocket.

His fist tightened, his knuckles turning white, and you turned the blade in your hand, ready to push into his fucking abdomen when all of the sudden his hold on you got lighter

"What the fuck is going on here?"

huh?

you turned your head to the side, and fuck if you wish you hadn't

"let her go"

he didn't

"I said let her go"

"or what?"

"Or I'll have to make you" Joel took a slow step toward him "and you don't want that"

"you think I'm scared of you?"

"I think you don't want any troubles" Joel explained "and neither do I"

The guy looked at you, and you just scowled at him,

You weren't mad at him,

well yes, you were, otherwise you wouldn't have gotten into a fight with him, 

but the annoyed look on your face now belonged exclusively to Joel fucking Miller, not him.

He quickly glanced at Joel before coming back to you

"you're lucky daddy came to the rescue"

"oh I'm sure I am" you rolled your eyes and he snickered as he let go,  slowly walking away into the sunlight just out of the shadowed alley.

Joel walked over to you, his expression angry and yet stoic.

"I didn't need your help"

He stopped in his track, glowering at you before taking a deep breath and resuming his steps.

"I had him"

He was now in front of you

"I'm sure you did"

You huffed annoyedly, crossing your arms and avoiding his expecting glare as you looked behind him at a spot on the red wall.

"Let's go" he ordered

"where?" you frowned

"my house"

You snickered "I expected you to be more of a gentleman, to be honest," you said, "not even a date first?"

His expression didn't change at all, still stoic, still annoyed, 

just like every time he talked to you.

"You need to get cleaned up" he explained, reaching for your chin and turning your head to the other side, studying your wounds "and maybe get a few stitches"

He stared at you, expecting an answer, and you stared back,

just two stubborn motherfuckers looking at one another

"fine" you gave in, after a long moment of silence

"good" he nodded "let's go," he said, grabbing your arm to walk you to his car.

"fuck" you winced as a shock of pain coursed to your ankle.

he didn't say anything, he just stopped, disapproval very clear on his face, but something else, something deeper, something hidden flashing behind his eyes, something that, as you looked closely, seemed to resemble concern.

"I'm fine," 

"let's go"

__  __  __

The stairs to his apartment creaked under his heavy boots, the feeble setting sun shining through the windows lighting only the rusty handrail and part of the floor as you struggled up on them.

He couldn't help but look back at you every few moments, he had been doing it since you got in the car, you didn't know if he thought you wouldn't notice, or if he did it absentmindedly, but as much as you wanted to find it annoying, just like everything else about him, his savior complex, his condescendingness, his stubbornness, it felt nice, it felt nice to have someone check up on you, see if you were following or had fallen down.

After what felt like an eternity, with one deep sigh, he finally got to his floor, and you followed just after.

"finally" you sighed, stepping on the tiled floor.

He didn't say anything,(what a surprise)and just started down the third door on the left side of the corridor.

"Hello"

You heard Joel audibly groan, and you couldn't help but smile, as he turned around to face his neighbor.

He was an old man, his hair fully white, his skin tired, his green eyes small, hidden under two very heavy brows, and a wooden cane gripped in his shaky hands.

"Hello, Mr. Jones" Joe grumbled, immediately turning back to the door to fumble with the keys.

"Hello" you then offered your widest smile, walking over to the old man "I'm y/n" you offered him your hand

"oh what a beautiful name you have" his trembling voice spoke, as he unsuccessfully tried to shake your hand "I'm Harold"

You smiled, you were already closer to Joel's neighbor than he was after only meeting him for five seconds. Of course.

"Harold" you repeated "I like it"you added "it's sexy"

"thank you young lady" he tried to laugh, but it quickly transformed into a cough.

" may I say," he said, struggling to take a slow step toward you "I'm glad someone's keeping him company" he nodded to Joel, who had opened the door and was looking at the two of you like he would have rather been dead than there right now "He's very lonely" he tried to lower his voice unsuccessfully "but can I ask you a question?"

"of course Harold"

"Well-" he glanced at him and then at you hesitantly "aren't you a bit too young?"

Your lips twitched into a very amused grin, "well you know what they say Harold" you turned to Joel, now even more irritated "the heart wants what it wants" you answered with the dreamiest and most dramatic of sighs, as he clenched his jaw, before turning back to his neighbor

"I better go now," you said "daddy doesn't like when I make him wait" you pouted, turning around and not even bothering to look at Joel as you entered his apartment.

He closed the door behind him.

"he seems nice" you commented, turning to him, as you stepped into the bare and sad-looking living room.

He sighed deeply, looking like there were so many things he wanted to say that he didn't even know where to start,

He pinched the bridge of his nose, and you witnessed him visibly give up, deciding just to guide you to the couch

"sit"

"yes sir" you smirked, and he sighed deeply again, his eyes closing briefly in exasperation before he walked to the bathroom to retrieve his first-aid kit.

The mahogany couch wasn't exactly the softest, but it still felt like heaven to you.

It had been what? 3 years since you ever felt a surface comfortable enough that you didn't have to get up with a sore back.

You closed your eyes, losing yourself in the feeling, as you laid your back against the sofa, and threw your head back.

Joel in the meantime had found the kit, and as he came back to the living room, finding you rested on his couch, a content look on your face, he couldn't help but stare for a moment before your eyes fluttered, and he cleared his throat, waking you up from the peaceful trance.

"Your house is nice,” you said “definitely needs some decorations, but it’s nice”

He shook his head “thank you” he grumbled, as he sat next to you.

His large hands contrasted with the small bag as he opened the zipper.

He took a ball of cotton out and used a bottle of disinfectant to wet it.

His hand then went to your face, turning you fully towards him so he could determine what he needed to do first.

It was a weird feeling, having him so close you could feel the heat radiating off of him, could smell his manly scent, and only hear his calm breathing, something sparked in the back of your head, a match lit, a match that had lit many times before, but just like those, you ignored it.

It was like an involuntary reflex, your body telling you that it wanted something, and you shutting it off.

He brought the cotton to your cheek, and a sting of pain ignited where he was cleaning, making you wince.

He stopped a moment, looking at you like he wanted to say something, but stopped himself before he actually could.

“He started it”

He tilted his head, looking like he didn’t believe you not in even in the slightest, and to be fair, he was right.

“I’m sure he did” he resumed cleaning the wound.

“I can protect myself you know?”

Something happened behind his eyes

“I don’t need you to come and save me”

“I can save myself”

He was silent as he wet another ball of cotton

“You’re gonna get yourself killed”

You blinked slowly, looking at your legs “so?”

His mouth opened, no words coming out of it

“You’d have one less puppy to rescue”

He frowned, visibly hurt and stunned at the same time.

"I-" he stared, but you interrupted him

"How did you even know where I was?"

He didn't answer

"were you following me?" you turned to him, and he still stayed silent, fueling your anger "oh my god, were you actually following me!?"

"I wasn't"

"and I'm supposed to believe you just stumbled across an abandoned alley?"

He sighed like he was about to say something he would have regretted"I asked around"

"You asked around" you repeated, "why?"

his ember eyes fell to his hands before coming back up to yours "I had a feeling"

"you had a feeling?" You chuckled "are you serious?"

"well I was right wasn't I?"

all the amusement disappeared from your face once again, he was always able to do that, always reminding you that he was an annoying piece of shit.

"I didn't need your help," you said, "I told you, I can protect myself" 

His eyes didn't let anything get through.

"Listen, I don't know what your deal is, why you feel like this is your problem, like I am your problem," you spoke "I don't know if you're doing it because you think that if you'll save me enough times I'll let you fuck me or if you just have a pathological need to have someone to save, but I'm telling you, I'm not that person, so find some other troubled girl to obsess over because this is ridiculous"

He swallowed thickly, his eyes cruising over your face "I don't-" he sighed "y/n I don't think that"

"about the fucking or the savior complex?"

He looked at you, his eyes very clearly saying -really?- 

"I want to help you"

was he fucking serious?

"I don't need your help, Joel!" you raised your voice "how many times do I have to fucking tell you?"

"you want me to thank you?"

"is that it?" you asked, "you want me to tell you how grateful I am that you get yourself involved in my life for whatever fucking reason?"

"you want me to tell you that you're so much better than me and that you're a good person?"

"well I'm sorry but I'm not going to" you spat out "I didn't ask for any of this"

The room fell silent, the first aid kit long forgotten.

You could feel him staring at you, but you couldn't look at him back.

"y/n"

you hated the way his name rolled so beautifully off his tongue.

You turned to him, scowling.

"I'm sorry," he said, taking you by surprise "maybe you're right, maybe I do have a savior problem or whatever you called it" he confessed "but if you really don't want my help why are you here?"

now it was your turn not to answer.

"you could have told me to fuck off but you didn't," he said "you got in the car and walked in here"

"so if you're gonna tell me I'm not honest with myself I think you should look at yourself first"

You exhaled deeply, anger so strong inside of you you felt like you were gonna burst any second now.

How dared he?

Who the fuck did he think he was?

fuck him.

fuck Joel.

"you know what? you're right" you nodded "I made a mistake coming here" you looked at him, before getting up from the couch " and I didn't tell you before but I'll tell you now," you glared at him "fuck off" you stated, before starting towards the door.

You heard the couch's springs creak as he got up, and you had no idea why but a sort of relief washed over you.

"fuck- wait, y/n-" he grabbed your arm, stopping you in your tracks.

"What?"  you turned to him "are you gonna give me another inspiring speech?" you mocked him "are you gonna finally tell me the secret on how to be so fucking annoy-"

His lips were on yours before you could even register him leaning closer.

Your eyes were still open, wide open.

His hands went to your waist and a shiver traveled up your spine, as a warmth invaded your body.

Fuck it felt nice.

You hadn't felt human contact in what felt like ages, and you couldn't help but reach for him too as you closed your eyes, melting into the kiss.

He took a step forward and you followed him, finding yourself trapped between the wallpapered wall and his body.

One of your arms went behind his neck, bringing him impossibly closer to you, while your other hand explored his body, starting from his chest and ending up on his back.

He, on the other hand, was still holding your waist, his hands so big, you felt like his fingers could have actually met where your belly button was if he had tried hard enough.

The kiss was heated, his salt and pepper beard grated against your mouth and cheeks as his tongue moved into your mouth, letting you taste him, all of him, from the dry meat he seemed to feed himself only of, to the whiskey you had caught on the kitchen counter.

You smiled into the kiss as he brought his arms behind your back, forcing you flush against him.

He leaned away, and from the look on his face, he was even more confused than you, which made you grin even wider.

You really wanted to tease him, but his parted lips looked too inviting now that you had gotten a taste of them, so you leaned closer and crashed your lips with his, in a hungry hungry kiss.

His hands went up your shirt and you whimper lowly into his mouth before he took it off for you, throwing it somewhere behind him.

His quick hands immediately went to grope your tits, your bra still on, your nipples hardening against it.

As he was busy with your tits, you started unbuttoning your shirt, your hands roaming on his now bare chest.

He suddenly broke the kiss just to start a trail of hot and sloppy ones on your neck.

"so I was right huh?" you breathed

"you really need to shut up" he murmured against  your neck, his voice  vibrating through your body

"or what" you laughed softly "you'll spank me?"

"might just have to"

oh

he smirked, clearly proud of himself

"you're so easy" he shook his head, now kissing your collarbones

"fuck off" you rolled your eyes even if he couldn't see "you're the one with a hard-on"

He chuckled briefly, before coming back up to your mouth "wanna do something about that?"

You smirked "depends" you bit your lip "what did you have in mind"

He smirked too "oh I have a lot of things in mind" he grabbed your sides firmly

"mh?" you hummed "like what?"

"like letting you kneel in front of me and watch as you take my cock down your throat" he hissed "you'd do that wouldn't you?"

"I would" you confessed with a breathy sigh.

Just the thought of it made you salivate.

"I knew you'd be good" 

You raised an eyebrow "so you did think about this" you smirked "I was right. you're a perv" you let the last word slowly roll out your tongue purposefully.

"and still, you're letting me fuck you" 

you smiled,

touchè.

"What did you think about?"

he looked at you questioningly

"When you thought about this what did you imagine?" you explained, even if it was obvious.

"oh" his hands started exploring your body again, "I thought about you" his mouth resumed the trail of kisses down your neck, "I thought about your body" one of his hands went to squeeze your ass "about the filthy sounds you'd make, about opening up your pretty legs" he murmured, as his feet spread your legs" and watch as I slip my cock so deep inside of you, you can't talk anymore"

An involuntary whimper fled your throat at the image.

"You'd like that?" he asked against your mouth, and you could only nod "words baby, use them"

"yes" you gulped "I would"

"good girl" he praised you "jump" he instructed, and when you did, he caught you, his hands holding your legs, balancing you around his waist.

He kissed you again as he walked towards his room, and once you were in, he threw you onto the bed, making you gasp audibly.

"take off your pants"

You tilted your head "where did all the chivalry go?" you bit your lip, as he pulled his pants off quickly.

"y/n..."

"Joel..." you looked at him maliciously as you slipped your shoes off.

"fine" he sighed, crouching in front of you and hooking his fingers into the waistband of your jeans to shuffle them off for you.

He groaned lowly just as he did, his eyes fixated on your clothed pussy.

He immediately took your panties off, and he seemed to have forgotten you were even there because he was so fascinated by your beauty that he seemed in a trance.

"fuck you're perfect" he groaned "such a pretty pussy" he said, kissing it briefly and earning a little whine from you "so wet" he passed a finger through your folds " he bit his lower lip "just waiting for my cock huh?" 

"yes Joel" you arched your back, and he smirked

"fuck you're such a slut" he chuckled "aren't you?" he whispered to your ear, as he bent down closer to you " you're my little slut" he murmured, as he took off your bra"ready to take anything I give you"

You would have fought this if it wasn't for all your reasoning having been thrown out the window the moment he had first touched you.

"say it"

You could feel his hard dick through his boxers and it was making it really difficult for you to think

"I am"

"you're what baby?"

"I'm your slut"

He growled, kissing a spot underneath your ear "that's right" he pulled his underwear down, his manhood staining from them "that's right baby" he kissed your mouth briefly before straightening up to position himself at your entrance.

You moaned loudly as he pushed himself in, your hand grabbing the sheets in a tight fist as he split you apart mercilessly.

"fuck Joel!" you cried out

"not so loud"

"why?" your breathing was ragged and he had only just started

"I have neighbors"

"and you don't want them to know you fuck?"

he didn't answer, as he took your legs and pulled them up to his waist, getting even deeper.

You giggled, realizing what it actually was "or do you not want them to know you're fucking someone half your age?" 

He glared at you "I'm not gonna lie" he bent down to ghost your lips "I was hoping that having my cock in your pussy was gonna shut you up" he said "but I guess I'm gonna have to try harder"

You bit down a grin but quickly had to let your lip go as he slammed into you harshly, a gasp fleeing your throat.

"fuck" you sighed

"you're gonna be good for me?"

Your lips twitched into a smug smile, and he thrust into you again.

"are you?"

You gave up

"yes-yes I am"

"good girl" he kissed you "see it wasn't so hard now was it?"

You shook your head no, and he grinned proudly, before leaning back again and grabbing your legs to keep them in place on his waist, he started pushing in and out of you, his pace quickly fastening.

"fuck you're tight baby" his voice was strained " 'feel so good" he groaned, his fingers leaving marks on your legs.

The bed was creaking beneath you, following his rhythm, just like your bouncing tits.

You were biting your lip to silence your moans, but as one of his hands came down to strike your ass, the pain mixing so deliciously with the pleasure, you couldn't help but moan, loudly.

"quiet" he struck you again, and you forced the cry climbing your throat to move back down.

"be quiet for me baby," he said, his pace not slowing in the slightest "or I'm not gonna let you come"

You looked at him with pleading eyes as you fought a whine.

"that's it" he praised you "that's it baby" you didn't think it was possible but he quickened his pace, his cock hitting every single spot "good girl" he groaned "just be quiet and I'll let you come" he murmured "don't you want that?" he asked, "don't you wanna come around my cock?"

You nodded eagerly 

"words baby"

"y-yes" you struggled to spit out "I do"

 "of course you do" he chuckled "you're such a slut" he cooed "you just have to don't you?" he mocked you "you just can't help it"

You bit your lip again, his words enlarging the tight ball in your belly that was ready to explode.

"Y-yes I'm a slut" you were breathless "I'm your slut, Joel"

"fuck" he growled "fuck- that's right"

"please Joel" your voice was almost inaudible under the sound of his skin slapping with yours.

"What baby? You already need to cum?"

You nodded, and he struck your ass again.

"y-yes " you remembered "I'm coming"

"good girl " he grunted "come, baby, come with me," he said, his thrust getting sloppier "such a good slut" he groaned "such a good fucking slut" he said, and the ball in your belly broke, a tidal wave of pleasure coursing through your whole body as he followed just after, grunting as he shot his cum deep inside of you, his head falling to your shoulder.

"fuck" he hissed, pulling out of you to lay next to you.

You grinned, laughing softly, and he looked confusedly at you "I knew I was right"

he scowled at you

"and she's back" 

#joel miller #joel miller x reader #joel miller smut #joel miller fic #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller x female reader #joel miller x fem!reader #joel the last of us #joel #smut #the last of us #the last of us fanfiction #joel miller x y/n #joel miller x you

[captainpondlilly]

Okay! The Gilear plush has arrived. This is my best attempt at all of his lines. Two have been unintelligible to me, and several are pretty long and fast which made it hard to follow.

My search history is.. hospitals near me, foot stuck in object, head stuck in object

You're low, he's low, It's Gilear's day baby!*

A guy on the street kicked me in the nuts as hard he could

I don't like "lunchlad"

Help me to understand what I have done to deserve this

My horoscope says "today is a good day to die motherfucker"

I ate a quick cup of yogurt on the way over here to bolster my spirits after I changed, I'm ever so sorry

What do you mean "When" life gives you lemons

I went to apply for the guidance counselor position but I was usurped by a drug dealing werewolf named Jawbone

In my haste to put the armor on I buckled the leg plate and think I clipped the tip of my penis against one of the leg plates and Everytime I move it feels like it might fall off so I ASSURE you demon I have no pride to speak of!

In highschool I was voted "Most Likely To Get Pushed Out Of A Tree"

My car was repossessed by the ride share app that I was working for

It's actually a good thing that no one came to my birthday party because the bounce house flooded and was swept out to sea

I just discovered that *all* of my emails have been going to everyone's spam

Unfortunately I have been banned from that hot air balloon service not because of anything that happened to me in particular but the guys who run it just sort of know my whole deal

Mmm this yogurt tastes like *potatoes*

I asked the woman at Home Depot why my plants kept dying and she said it seemed like they were reaching away from the sun

I've found out recently that one of my shoes is so filled with mildew because a pipe in my bedroom is leaking and I've developed a fungal infection in my foot which I didn't know was possible for elves to get

I don't think that I've ever "Peaked" in that we started neutral and have been going downhill ever since

I am currently trapped in a storm drain. The bottom half of me is above the ground, the other is below

Another Own Goal for Gilear Faeth, yes

Everyone knows you eat 7 spiders in your sleep every year, but I have a bunch coming into me the backway

My sandcastle I'm afraid was destroyed, as I was about to finish it, the tide came in and with it a man holding a bazooka who shot me and killed me

I know you're not going to believe this but Ive just been kicked by a snake

I found out the hard way that people can legally reject status as an emergency contact

The title of my autobiography is going to be Gilear Faeth: Please Stop

On my way here I was carrying a large bowl of Italian wedding soup which shattered on the ground in front of me and several of the small pasta balls rolled through the cracks and alerted vermin to my presence. I've since learned after a trip to the hospital I am deathly allergic to the sting of millipedes which is a way of me saying I need someone to come down to the hospital and pay for this. There is a doctor holding a gun to my head and now that I think about it this clinic is in the back of a storage unit and I think have gone to the wrong place

he said and I quote "he'd stomp my goon ass" if I ever got on his bus again

Gorthalax it was very nice to meet you, you've made a cuckold of me

We're the throw up boys!*

I've been informed that the brownies I consumed were laced with cannabis and rat poison

I am completely unprepared for the perils ahead and am deeply frightened, I'll go get the coffee

A gorilla monster punched me so hard in the back of the head I died

Today I have been hit by 3 scooters

Everytime you squeeze my hand it breaks several small bones

My imaginary friend as a child ghosted me because he said I was too depressing

Do you want me to go back? I warn you, it will break me

Can I interest you in an herbal soda? You must understand I am an intern at a ponzi scheme*

When I go to sleep at night I dream of a world where I might be able to walk through a field without stepping on a rake or gopher hole

If anyone needs me... I will be surprised.

If it wasn't for bad luck, Id have no luck is both true and what was written upon the billboard I crashed through

I wonder if any of these will feature in Junior year 👀

*Thanks to @cappa-cappa for telling me the lines I wasn't able to make out!!

#d20 #dimension 20 #naddpod #bahumia #brian murphy #emily axford #brennan lee mulligan #gilear faeth #siobhan thompson #lou wilson #ally beardsley #dropout #spire #fantasy high #fantasy high freshman year #fantasy high sophomore year #fantasy high junior year

[qqueenofhades]

I'm having a bit of a rough mood from seeing that the judge in the Georgia case dismissed some of the orange motherfucker's charges.

Can I get some your ever-insightful perspective on this, and if there's still hope for prison time for something? Anything at all?

I can offer a few pieces of context on this, yes. First, the judge did dismiss a few of the less-substantiated and secondary charges against Trump in the Georgia election interference case. However, these charges were primarily related to "soliciting others to make false statements," i.e. how he enlisted others in the purpose of overturning the GA election results, and do not contest or impact upon the actual fact of election subversion (which is at the core of the prosecution). The judge also openly invited the prosecutorial team to re-submit the dismissed charges with more substantiated evidence and clearer testimony, so this wasn't a from-the-bench hack job like the ones Aileen Cannon keeps running in the Mar-a-Lago classified documents case (seriously, when can we appeal to the 11th Circuit to get her taken off? WHEN???) Which, considering that this is a Republican judge appointed by a Republican governor (Brian Kemp) is a good sign.

In short, this wasn't the judge saying "all these charges are bogus and inadmissible," it was the judge saying "I'll dismiss a few of these for not being as well substantiated as the others, but please resubmit with revisions/improvements and I will be happy to consider them again." And while I am not a lawyer, it is my understanding that prosecutors typically bring a multiplicity of charges, including some that might not ultimately stick, in case of this exact circumstance where some of them get dismissed/required to undergo judicial review/are otherwise ancillary to the central indictment. Which, in this case, is still intact. So no, Trump is 100% not "getting entirely off the hook" or "no longer under investigation in Georgia" or whatever else. I'm sure the GOP will try to spin it as such, but ignore them. The Trump "find me 11,780 votes" phone call to Raffensperger and the rest of his Georgia election interference has not been dismissed, and the RICO case still largely exists as first filed.

This is also a good sign that the judge won't order Fani Willis dismissed and the case completely shut down, as the Georgia Republicans have been trying to do with their hit-job inquiry into her personal life. If the judge was leaning toward dismissing Willis/the case entirely, this could have been a lot more sweeping intervention, but it doesn't look like he's going to do that, and in fact offered them an invitation to re-submit and make the case stronger. So that actually bodes better for the chances of eventually securing a conviction in the Georgia case, if the prosecutors have to go back to the drawing board and make sure everything is airtight. It's probably helpful to see all this in the above light and to understand that all legal cases drag on for years, with forward progress and setbacks. Especially this one, which is unprecedented in all ways.

However, I need to warn people again about thinking that Trump will be tried, convicted, and imprisoned before the election, and that this will spare us from having to vote against him or otherwise electorally dispose of him. SCOTUS, to nobody's surprise but still our disappointment, agreed to hear the Trump immunity case in late April (instead of just accepting the DC Circuit's opinion), and while they're likely to rule against him, that still creates another months-long delay. Importantly, though, the Department of Justice has announced that the "no legal proceedings 60 days before the election" rule does NOT apply to Trump, as he has already been indicted and the cases are currently being litigated. If they had decided that the 60-day rule applied, all trial proceedings would have to be frozen in the first week of September, but since not, they can continue into October and November. If the 60-day rule had been upheld, it would have drastically increased the odds of Trump avoiding trial entirely before the election, as few prosecutors would have wanted to proceed when they knew that there was an automatic kill switch built in. But if the DOJ holds to this, Trump could literally be on trial on Election Day itself. Which is good, obviously, but still: it will not be the magic solution. We still have to vote for Biden.

As I have said before, the stakes in 2024 are simple. The criminal trials will not get rid of Trump before the election. There will be another election that is Trump vs. Biden and therefore one of them will win the presidency. If Biden wins and Trump loses, Trump will be out of delay options and will go to prison almost 100% as all his criminal chickens come home to roost. If he wins, we will be fucked for generations to come. Vote accordingly.

#anonymous #ask #politics for ts #the giant orange monster

[tigertales9]

Good Clean Fun

Pairing: Joe Burrow x Reader

Warnings: 18+ / Smut

Description: You accompany Joe to the Hamptons for the white party

Time/Place: July 3, 2023 - the Hamptons, NY

A/N: I wrote this just after the white party pics dropped, but I'm still not sure about it. 😬 I've tweaked it to pieces and finally decided to just offer it up. Hope y'all like it.

Inspo pic: (one of many)

Pic source = white party hotness

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

You jolt awake at the sound of your phone ringing, fumbling to grab it off the bedside table. "Hey," you whisper.

"Hey," Joe says. "What are you doing?"

"Just laying in bed … thinking about you," you answer nonchalantly, not wanting to admit you were asleep. "How's the party going?"

"It's … fine," he mutters. "I wish I was there with you."

"Me too, babe."

"I'm thinking about leaving early."

You check the clock on the bedside table. "Better stick it out for at least another hour," you advise, smiling when he heaves a sigh. "I know it's not your scene, but you need to do this, okay?"

"Are you gonna be awake when I get back?" he asks, the pouty tone in his voice causing you to smile even bigger.

"Of course. Shoot me a text when you leave and I'll be waiting for you at the front door."

"Promise?"

"I promise," you chuckle. "Now get back out there and mingle," you order, laughing at his dramatic groan.

"Yes, ma'am," he grumbles. "Love you."

"Love you, too," you echo.

You set your phone down and look around the elegant but unfamiliar bedroom. Joe had begged you to come with him to the Hamptons even though you weren't invited to the white party. Y'all had flown up the day before on a private jet, quickly settling into your Airbnb before ordering a dinner delivery of salmon piccata pasta, caesar salad and garlic bread. Joe had uncorked a bottle of crisp sauvignon blanc, and y'all had enjoyed your meal while watching an amazing sunset from your upstairs balcony.

You smile to yourself thinking about what happened after dinner; you and Joe tangled together on the plush bed, him getting you off twice with his fingers and tongue before putting your legs over his shoulders and fucking you slow and deep, his big hands teasing your breasts and clit in a way that had you writhing beneath him, your third climax of the night hitting so hard you actually saw stars.

You bite your lip at the intense memory as you flop back against a pile of fluffy pillows, heaving a sigh as you look around the tastefully decorated bedroom. The Airbnb is a few miles away from Billionaire Lane where the white party is taking place, but even though it's more modest than those monuments to conspicuous consumption, it still has amazing views, a super comfy king-sized bed, and a huge shower with a built-in bench and several different water features.

You giggle when you think about the shower; you had a little solo fun in there earlier after a couple glasses of wine and a couple pics of your man at the white party looking like a walking orgasm got you worked up. "Sexy motherfucker," you mutter to yourself, still smiling at the naughty memory when your phone chimes; you read the text from Joe before sending a quick reply.

"Thirty minutes is not exactly an hour, Joseph Lee," you giggle to yourself, "but okay." You place your phone on the bedside table before easing off the bed and walking into the en suite bathroom to check your reflection in the mirror. You're wearing a short silk robe the color of pale seafoam green and a lace thong to match. Your face is devoid of makeup and your long wavy hair is in a messy bun on top of your head; you briefly consider fixing it before giving a shrug. "Fuck it," you mutter, walking downstairs just in time to see a car pull into the driveway. You watch through a front window as Joe climbs out of the backseat of the car and ambles up the sidewalk, his slightly unsteady, long-legged stride making you smile as you swing the front door open.

"Hey," you purr, staying mostly hidden behind the door as the car reverses out of the driveway and drives off into the warm, humid night.

"Hey," he mutters, giving you a lopsided smile as you close the door behind him. "You look gorgeous," he says, reaching a hand out to finger your slinky robe as you raise an eyebrow in response. "And you look drunk as fuck," you chuckle, pulling him into a tight hug. "Did you have a good time?" you ask, inhaling his pungent aroma of sweat, vodka and a hint of weed.

"Not really," he pouts, "and I'm not drunk. I'm just a little buzzed," he argues. "Just a little crossfaded," you retort. "Maybe a little," he admits, giving you a sheepish smile when you pull back and look up at him. "But I'm mostly just tired as hell," he continues. "I couldn't relax the entire time I was there because I felt like an animal on display at the zoo. I mean, it was fun to catch up with the guys, but then there were these random peeps who kept staring at me, taking pics and vids." He makes a stank face before continuing. "Some of them even tried to talk to me," he shudders. "Weird as fuck."

"Awww, you must be so exhausted," you murmur sympathetically, pulling him into another tight hug. "I am," he sighs, burying his face in your neck as you reach under his shirt and scratch his back through his thin tank top. "Poor baby," you coo. "It's a lot of work dodging all that pussy being thrown at you. No wonder you're tired."

He leans back and looks down at you, narrowing his eyes at the bratty look on your face. "For a second I actually thought you felt sorry for me," he grumbles, trying hard not to smile when you roll your eyes. You stick your tongue out at him just as his stomach gives a loud growl. "Did you eat anything at the party?" you ask, shaking your head when he lists a few appetizers. "That's not nearly enough," you state, grabbing his hand and leading him into the kitchen. "Good thing I got you a lobster roll when I ordered mine earlier."

"Oh yum!" he chirps, placing his phone and sunglasses on the kitchen island before shrugging his "crochet" shirt off and tossing it over a barstool; he hurries to the kitchen sink and washes his hands, giving you an almost giddy smile as he plops down in another barstool, his entire demeanor perking up at the thought of delicious food.

You preheat the toaster oven before pulling a fluffy split-top roll out of a paper bag; you quickly slather butter on the roll before popping it into the oven to crisp up, throwing him a smile over your shoulder while opening the fridge. "I got it deconstructed so it wouldn't get soggy," you say, grabbing a bottle of water out of the fridge and sliding it across the counter to him. "It'll be ready in just a few minutes."

"Thanks, babe," he sighs, twisting the cap off and guzzling most of the bottle in about five seconds, a tiny drop of water escaping one corner of his mouth to casually slide down the long, sexy column of his throat. You watch the downward progress of the runaway water droplet like your life depends on it, biting your lip when he finally wipes it away just before it reaches his collarbone. Your gaze lingers on his broad shoulders, muscular chest and sculpted arms, the skimpy tank top and smiley face necklace he's wearing showcasing those impressive attributes in a way that makes your mouth water.

"What are you thinking?" he asks, giving you a loaded look when you meet his gaze.

~ DING ~

You jump as the timer on the oven goes off, shaking your head as you place the warm roll on a plate before grabbing the container of lobster salad out of the fridge. "I'm thinking I need to get this food in your belly," you mutter, smiling when Joe groans as he watches you pile an obscene amount of lobster onto the crispy roll before setting the plate in front of him.

"You're so good to me," he mutters, taking a huge bite of the roll as you hand him a bag of kettle chips and another bottle of water. "SO good," he repeats, his eyes rolling back in his head as he devours another bite. "I didn't realize I was so hungry," he mumbles, holding a big hand in front of his mouth as he speaks so as not to show you his half-chewed food.

You walk behind him and scratch his back as he continues to scarf his food, grinning when he pulls his tank top off to give you better access. You continue to scratch his bare back just the way he likes, your pulse reacting to the sex-type noises spilling from his pretty lips. "Feel good?" you ask, sliding one hand up the nape of his neck into his sweaty curls, his low-throated moan making you want to pull his hair and have your way with him. You ponder that naughty thought for a second until your pragmatic inner voice reminds you he needs food and sleep more than sex since y'all have a fairly early flight out tomorrow morning.

"Feels amazing," he groans after swallowing his last bite of lobster roll.

You give his back a final scratch before grabbing his empty plate and walking to the sink. "I got you some dessert, too," you say, quickly rinsing the plate and washing your hands before reaching into the delivery bag to pull out a small package. "I hope that's a euphemism for sex," he purrs, giving you a dirty wink when you cut your eyes at him. "These are better than sex" you state, placing a napkin in front of him before setting two peanut butter chocolate chip cookies on it.

He raises one eyebrow before taking a huge bite of cookie. After chewing and swallowing he narrows his eyes at you. "These are delicious, but they're not better than sex. Not even close."

"I was just teasing," you chuckle, watching in amusement as he crams the rest of the first cookie in his mouth before reaching for the second. "If you think these are better than sex then I really need to up my game," he grumbles, polishing off the final cookie while giving you a pouty grimace.

"I said I was teasing, grumpy cat," you giggle, reaching forward to wipe cookie crumbs off of his lips while he continues to faux-glower at you. "If you upped your game you'd give me a stroke." You flick his pouty bottom lip a couple times until he smiles. "Anyway," you continue, "quit thinking about sex. You need a shower and sleep since we have an early-ish flight tomorrow."

He makes a face before speaking. "I'm almost too tired to take a shower, but I know I need one since I feel grimy." He lifts an arm and gives his armpit a hearty sniff. "I smell like b.o. and vodka."

"And weed," you interject, chuckling when he wrinkles his pert nose at you. "C'mon," you urge. "I'll help you shower since you're so wrung out."

He follows you upstairs into the en suite bathroom, leaning against the wall as you turn the shower on to heat up. You squeeze toothpaste onto both of your toothbrushes before handing him his, keeping a close eye on him while you brush to make sure he doesn't fall asleep on his feet.

When you finish brushing you strip naked before helping him do the same, ushering him into the steamy shower and immediately ordering him to sit on the built-in bench while you angle all of the water jets to your liking. You grab the handheld shower head, quickly switching the setting from pulsate to rainfall before wetting him down head to toe, stepping in between his spread thighs as he slumps back against the tile wall and groans at the feel of the warm water cascading over him.

"Let's wash your hair first," you murmur, placing the shower head back in its holder before squeezing some shampoo in your palm. You rub your hands together before sliding them into his wet hair, thoroughly lathering the drenched strands while he ogles your bare chest.

"Close your eyes and keep 'em closed, please," you state.

"How am I supposed to keep my eyes closed when your tits are jiggling in my face?"

"You wanna get shampoo in your eyes?"

"No."

"Then keep 'em closed."

"Yes, ma'am," he grumbles, squeezing his eyes closed as you step a little closer, dropping a quick kiss on his wet forehead before massaging his scalp. "Feels good," he groans, sucking his plump bottom lip into his mouth as you grind the pads of your fingers against his temples, slowly working your way down the nape of his neck before reversing course. You smile at the look on his face as you grab the shower head. "I'm about to rinse so keep your eyes closed tight."

"Okay."

You thoroughly rinse his hair then grab his tube of face cleanser. "Hold a hand out for some face cleanser," you order, squeezing some gel onto his palm and waiting for him to lather up his face before rinsing again. He wipes the water off of his face and slicks his hair back as you reach for his shower pouf and wet it down, squeezing a generous dollop of his fav body wash on it before getting down to business.

You get him to lean forward so you can reach his back then move to his shoulders, working the foamy lather down each muscular arm all the way to his fingertips, pushing his wristbands up to clean underneath before moving to his chest; you grin when he squirms a bit as you tease his nipples with the frilly sponge, urging him to lift both arms so you can scrub his pits before continuing down his torso.

You bypass his crotch, ignoring the fact that he's semi-erect as you lather up his long legs, upper thigh to ankle. "You better do your feet," you giggle, knowing you could easily catch a foot upside the head if you accidentally tickle him. "Got it," he mumbles, quickly scrubbing his feet before handing the sponge back to you.

You rinse the pouf and apply more body wash, dropping to your knees between his spread legs before matter-of-factly soaping up his dick, still ignoring the fact that it's getting stiffer by the second as you slide the mesh sponge down over his balls and between his cheeks. He scoots a bit lower on the bench to give you better access and you slide two soapy fingers just behind his balls, biting your lip when he moans low in his throat as you massage the sensitive skin, reaching farther back to ghost your slick fingers over his hole a few times before grabbing the shower head to rinse him off. You give him a thorough rinse starting at his shoulders and working your way down, your mouth watering at the sight of his fully-erect cock laying against his glistening abs.

You eventually place the shower head back in its holder and position yourself on your knees between Joe's legs, dropping open-mouthed kisses from knee to groin, leaving love bites where his ample ass meets the top of his muscular thighs. He gives a grunt of approval and cups one big hand behind the nape of your neck as you lightly suck his balls while ghosting your fingertips over his impressive erection, teasing him for a few minutes before sliding your tongue farther back, tickling his hole with your tongue while slowly pumping his cock.

"Woman, if you keep that up I'm gonna cum in ten seconds," he grits out.

"Is that good or bad?"

"I wanna cum," he gives you a naughty smile, "but not in ten seconds."

"Okay, I'll ease up," you chuckle, his well-defined abs tensing under your fingers as you slide your hands up his torso, teasing his nipples while sucking your plump bottom lip into your mouth, giving him a filthy grin before lowering your head.

You hold eye contact with him as you flatten your tongue against the base of his cock and slowly drag it up, tracing a prominent vein all the way up before lapping at the precum on his tip; you feel his hand tighten on the back of your neck as you take him deep s-l-o-w-l-y, feeling every vein on his cock as you start to bob your head; you go deep enough to choke on him a few times, knowing he loves it even if he's too much of a gentleman to push your head down himself.

"Yeah, baby, just like that," he groans, squirming underneath you as you continue your sensual onslaught, dropping a hand down to play with his balls before sliding it farther back to tease his hole. "Don't stop!" he grits out, his throaty groans magnified by the acoustics of the shower enclosure as you follow orders, tears streaming down your cheeks as you continue to deep throat him.

When you feel the first spurt of his climax hit the back of your throat you quickly pull off and take the rest of his load on your face, using your free hand to milk every last drop out of him. "Fuck!" he grunts, his head dropping back against the tile with a thud as he watches you slide your tongue out to lick his creamy essence off of your lips. "So fuckin' hot," he mutters, panting hard as he continues to watch you through half-mast eyelids.

You wait a few minutes before speaking. "Did you like that?" you ask, playing with his slowy-softening erection as he catches his breath.

"I loved it." He gives you a blissed-out grin as you reach for the shower head, quickly rinsing your face and hands before turning it on him to give him a final rinse.

"Good. Let's get you dried off and tucked into bed."

"Lemme get you off first."

"You can return the favor tomorrow."

"Are you sure?"

"I'm sure." You step out of the shower and grab a fluffy towel, handing it to him as he steps out behind you. "You want some undies?" you ask while drying yourself off, stepping into a pair of panties as he half-ass dries himself. "Gimme that," you chuckle, taking the towel from him and vigorously finishing the job. "No undies," he mumbles, walking into the bedroom and faceplanting onto the bed. You laugh to yourself as you crawl into bed beside him. "Goodnight," you whisper. "Night," he croaks, his voice muffled by the pillow.

After several minutes of silence, he speaks up again. "You still awake?"

"Yeah."

He turns to face you. "I feel like I left you hanging," he says, punctuating this statement with a huge yawn. "Lemme get you off."

"I'm good, babe, seriously. I'm kinda tired, plus I had a little solo fun earlier with that handheld shower head."

He perks up at the mention of you pleasuring yourself. "Tell me more," he orders while scooting closer, his expression a little hard to read in the dim lighting.

"You know how our handheld shower head at home only has two settings?"

"Yeah."

"Well this one has a few extra settings." You give him a naughty smile before continuing. "One of them is pulsate."

"Ohhh, sounds interesting. So you got yourself off with it?"

"Mmm-hmm. I got worked up looking at pics of you so I decided to relieve the pressure."

"That's hot," he purrs. "Why didn't you do a repeat performance just now when we were in the shower together?"

"Because you were half asleep," you state, smiling when he tries to stifle another huge yawn.

"I would've instantly been wide awake if you started going at it with the pulsating shower head," he grumbles.

"Exactly. That's why I didn't do it." You give him a quick kiss before rolling onto your side, facing away from him. "Go to sleep, horndog. Our car will be here to pick us up at 10:00 am."

"Did you set an alarm?"

"Yeah. We'll have just enough time to get dressed and pack our shit before the car gets here."

"Can you set it for forty minutes earlier? Pretty sure we're gonna need a looong shower before we leave for the airport."

"Are you serious?" you ask, rolling back over to try and read his expression.

"I'm dead serious," he mutters, giving you a sleepy smile when you grab your phone off the bedside table to reset your alarm.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

You do a final walk-thru of the bedroom and bathroom, making sure y'all haven't left anything before heading downstairs. You check your watch as you walk into the kitchen -- 9:49 am -- giving Joe a smile as he places your bags by the front door.

"Good thing we're in an Airbnb and not a hotel," he states, winking at you when you raise an inquisitive eyebrow. "Why?"

"Because that loud ass scream you let out in the shower would have folks calling 911 if they heard it," he teases, pulling you into a hug when you roll your eyes at him. "Did you scream that loud when you went solo with the pulsating shower head?" he whispers against your ear.

"I didn't scream at all when I went solo."

"So it was better with me?"

"Of course it was better with you," you scoff, leaning back to give him a 'boy please' look. "Your fingers, tongue and this," you give his cock a gentle squeeze through his slinky shorts, "were the stars of the show. The shower head was fun, but you're always the main event."

"Glad to hear it," he gloats, giving you a smug smile while reaching into a pocket to grab his phone. He quickly pulls something up before showing you his screen. "I ordered a pulsating shower head for you," he grins, giving a dirty chuckle when your eyes go wide. "You didn't have to do that," you demur, secretly thrilled that he did. "You know I'm always looking for new ways to make you scream," he purrs, sliding his tongue into your mouth when you pull him down for a kiss.

Several heartbeats later a car horn honks in the driveway, signaling the arrival of your ride to the airport. "I'll thank you later, daddy," you whisper against his slick lips, giggling when he playfully swats your ass.

#joe burrow #joe burrow fan fic #joe burrow fanfic #joe burrow x reader #joe burrow imagine

[lizzieisright]

SAY IT LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK!!!!!!!!!! abby anderson would be the best fucking alpha in the game, and you just know she’d be so smug when another alpha tried to flirt with you but backs off once they realize THE abby anderson is YOUR alpha. I need this more than air atp

Yessssss she'd be so respectful and caring and so fucking protective but in the best way possible! She'd be this type of an alpha that comes across like a total fucking asshole because she looks like she'd kill you just for the crime of breathing but you know she's a softie and low-key terrified of you.

And you'd be chilling at a party, waiting for Abby to show up because your alpha is a busy woman and the only reason she even bothers to show up is to make sure you're okay. You're talking to what seems like a very sweet alpha - she's not creepy and even though you feel that she is attracted to you, she is very respectful as she closes the distance between you little by little. You ignore it for now, because you like talking to people and this alpha is nice to talk to.

But when Abby enters the room you know everyone feels it, not only you. Abby has the most suffocating alpha presence known to a man, her heavy calm eyes looking through the people but everyone feels the threat. No one dares as much as to look at her because Abby is a scary motherfucker and picking up a fight with her never ended well, especially since she is not actually bothering anyone, just makes all alphas in the room feel like they're pups. And you feel so smug, because this is your alpha, she has your bite mark on her shoulder.

The sweet alpha in front of you seems a little confused, but as you feel Abby getting closer, her scent hitting your nose, the sweet alpha starts to look scared. (Abby is probably staring her down and you know from experience this doesn't feel nice).

Abby doesn't hug you or lean to kiss your cheek, no. She doesn't need that to show who you belong to. She presses to you from the back and you turn your head to her.

"Hi Abby." You say with a shit-eating grin because your alpha is ridiculous. "This is Sophie, we just met."

"Hi." Sophie manages to say with s steady voice and you have to give it to her, because Abby is still staring her down. It's subtle, but awful nonetheless. "I'll leave you two alone." Sophie smiles politely and saves her dignity from challenging fucking Abby Anderson.

"See you around." You say politely because you always like to have new friends, and when Sophie is far enough you turn to Abby fully and frown playfully at her. "Your ego just grew three times didn't it."

Abby, the smug bastard, smiles at you and holds your face in her big callused palm.

"What can I say, scaring off other alphas from my girl is very satisfying." Abby buries her nose in your neck and breathes in. "Should've bitten you somewhere where everyone could see you're taken."

"I would've killed you for that."

"Would be so worth it, pretty girl."

#abby anderson x reader #abby anderson x you #alpha!abby #abby anderson #abby tlou #listen what if i came up with the whole backstory for this while i wrote this what then huh

[weebsinstash]

I would ruin him. (Clark)

My Adventures With Superman Clark hits me as the kind of yandere where you fuck him after a few casual drinks because he's just so cute and dorky like just the nerdiest shy little hunk you can't help but spank his bubble butt and ride him till he's about to cry and then later on you find out you took his virginity and that casual fucking doesn't exist in his world and he wants you as a serious partner now and won't really take no for an answer

Like lowkey he gives me Izuku energy with how he's, a sweet dedicated uwu baby (like motherfucker LITERALLY makes the cat mouth in one episode) but can be an absolute menace when you upset him or rather, when he's worried for your wellbeing. You can scream and yell and say the most awful things to him and he won't raise a hand against you but if anyone hurt you... well. I mean. They'll be grievously injured is all I'm saying.

Just the idea of absolutely wrecking his shit in bed just like really giving it to him and blowing his poor lil country boy mind as you permanantly punch the hole in that v card of his and afterwards you're just, back at the office like it's nothing, thinking you just got some amazing dick but nothing else, meanwhile he thinks you're like. Dating now 😭 god could you even imagine if you two start regularly getting coffees or like, doing small things together, and you just take it as like hanging out platonically and, he thinks you're going on dates and are officially dating and one day he just outright catches you with another man and is CRUSHED that you basically just say "what??? We had a one night stand, I thought that was just a casual thing?? Bro you thought us hanging out as friends was a date????"

Clark going home taking off his glasses to cry in front of his shrine of photos of you with candles and everything 😭 he's kept receipts from getting coffee or catching a movie together, bought a tube of the same kind of hand cream you use so he can have something that smells like you and also uses it too (it's good stuff, thanks for the unintentional recommendation!), he's got like notebooks with flowcharts and ideas for future potential dates, all sorts of personal notes about you, what you like, plans for the future together, some real over the top shit, bro is practically planning for marriage

You could quit your job to avoid this man and he'd be stalking you as Superman but I think it'd be hilarious if you said "Clark I know that's you :/" just, almost right away. Or, he gets on your good side as Superman while you avoid him as Clark, so, some real miraculous ladybug love triangle shit. LMAOOO imagine going to let Supes get in those guts because you think he's so hunky and cute and he's like absolutely blowing your back out, really taking charge, it's amazing, and you flip him over and it's. Seeing him on his back with his hair all tossled already with him inside of you that THEN you're like "oh shit CLARK???" but like he won't let you hop off until you've both finished either 😩❤️

He's just so. Cute and young in this new show. I want to like. Be the milf neighbor he chases after. I want to invite him in for some lemonade after he helps cut my grass and I suck him off so good he comes back every single week to "help me around the house" 👌 I fix his glasses and ruffle his hair as he leaves my front step with a blush. I wave to him with a wine glass in hand in my fuzzy pink robe and thank him for 'fixing my plumbing' and that I'll see him again Tuesday 💅

#yandere x reader #yandere superman #sinprompts #yandere stuff #going to martha kents bookclub at her house only to sneak off and get railed by her son

[deadpool15]

Roomate part 1

This is some dumb fucking shit. How can someone be this bad at their job, while sitting here smiling in my fucking face. "So, explain to me, umm, what was your name again?" Mika said, staring at the realtor with absolute disgust and annoyance. "Just Kim would be fine, sweetheart," he states, staring me up and down with a flirty expression. "Yea, that's amazing. I'm gonna call you bitch ass, you cool with that?" I stated watching his face completely drop. "So, since this very kind women can't talk to you like a fucking adult, I'm just gonna talk to you like the man child you mother obviously failed to raise. Now, would you be a dear and tell me how exactly does someone manages to sell a place to two different people with knowing. We obviously don't fucking look or sounds anything alike. Therefore, that rolls out that pathetic ass excuse. I should whoop your ass bitch-."

As I went to jump on him, the unknown woman that was standing next to me grabbed me. Holding me while apologizing, causing the man to immediately leave in fear. "OK ok you can stop now, Ms." I roughly back away from her casting her to put up her hands in the air as a showcase of surrender. "I know we are in a bit of a predicament here, but the papers have already been finalized. Plus, this place is more than big enough for the both of us, so we can just share it." I stared her down before laughing and shaking my head. "If you fuck up, I'll whoop your ass too."

And well, that's how me and bada met. At first, there was a bit of hostile energy, mainly from my side. I wasn't really sure about her, like I was judging her character before I let the real me out. Then, it all changed one night. She randomly got home from a long ass day of working, saying she needed some self-care immediately. I mean, true enough, I wasn't so sure about her yet, but I'm not a monster, and a girl in need is simply a girl in need. I sat her on the couch while we did face masks and painted each other's nails. She was a little on the rocky side about the nails, but I managed to talk or more so threaten her into it. After a while, we started talking about life. I learned she had a boyfriend named Howl, strange ass name.

"Wait so like when you two fuck, do you moan out howl or just government name. Because u fucking can't right now." I said laughing and hitting the coach, while bada sat there embarrassed and pushing me over. "I mean, I don't know. Like I don't really sit there and think about it." She says shyly. "What about you?" "Oo I don't do relationships, I mean, it's enough me to go around right. Plus, this pussy game is crazy, will have a motherfucker all obsessive and shit." She stares atcthe ground shocked. "Wow, are all Americans like this?" "Like what?"Just open and out there." I chuckle before adjusting myself on the seat. "To be honest, babes, I mean sex is sex. We are adults we should be able to talk about it freely. Plus, Korea is just really hush hush and polite about that stuff."

That night, Bada and i bonded. We became like sisters. Telling each other everything. I even met her man. They were a hot couple. I could see why they would go for each other. But that's pretty much all about Howl. we got to know each other to a certain degree. I mean, at the end of the day, girl code still exists, and it's something i truly ride and believe in, sisters over misters, you know. Like him and Bada would help pick out my outfits and stuff. Like right now. "So, what do you think?" I ask both of them as they are sitting on my bed eating snacks. "Don't you think they are a bit revealing?" Howl said while opening up another bag of the hot fries I had shipped here, while bada shoke her head, agreeing with him. "First of all, I'm a grown ass woman who is everything but insecure so I can show off. Secondly, shawty was fine in that pic she sent me, so she must wanna see all this. So, which one sluty sexy or sluty cute."

Each outfit was revealing yet gave a different vibe. I never questioned why Howl was protective over me, shit I thought he saw me as his little sister like Bada. Boy was I fucking wrong. I started showing then the messages between me and mystery women. She was a hot masc with a long wolf cut. And the entire conversation basically consists of us trying to have phone sex. But why sit in bed and play with myself when I can have her do it for me. "Wow, you two really are going to do this on the first date?" Bada asked while staring at me, looking slightly nervous, yet I couldn't understand why. To be honest, they both had been acting weird lately. They were like my best friends, so I wanted to know what was happening but didn't wanna drag it on. Maybe it's nothing. "Now you know I don't plan on dating that girl. Anyways, I'm sticking with sexy, so I'll be back and you two can do anything you horny fucks can thing of. Except fucking on my bed. Move it along weirdos." I tell them walking out the house.

"What the fuck, this shit is getting out of hand, Bada I thought we agreed to tell her?" Howl said angrily thinking about all the things Mika could be doing right now with that girl, she had been gone for hours. "I know, this is hard for me too. But we can't just tell her out of the blue. Hey, me and my boyfriend are totally in love with you, and I know you don't do relationships, but are you willing to date us, so we can finally call you ours and stop listening to you fuck other people." Bada stated basically yelling at him. "We just need to tell her this is bullshit-"

Before they could finish their conversation, they heard something slam against the door, startling them both. The sounds kept repeating as if someone was trying to get in, causing Howl to immediately grab Bada and place her behind him, thinking someone was trying to break into the apartment. "Are we being robbed?" Bada asks Howl in slight fear, but before he could defend them, both Mika comes crashing through the door, drunk as shit. With what seems to be her date. Both of them kissed and basically dry humping each other with clothes on, paying no mind to the people in the house. Mika moves her hand trying to lock the door before, the unknown woman grabs her neck shoves her knee into pussy, making sure to rub away all the tension. They both moan into each other's mouths and finally lock the door stumbling into her room, still without acknowledging her fellow roommate and boyfriend.

As they bedroom door abruptly closes shut, they are now finally out of the eye sight of Bada and Howl, who are seething in anger. "I thought you said they weren't gonna work out, jackass?" Bada whisper yelled at Howl, hitting him in the shoulder. Though he can't even find the time to register the pain before all they can hear is the sound of the bed creeks against the wall. "They shouldn't have, I mean, they don't have anything in common. What the fuck does she has that we don't?" "We are telling her tomorrow, I don't care what we have to do but she is gonna know. We can't go on like this. It's supposed to be the three of us, ok?" Howl says while grabbing Bada's cheeks, looking into her eyes for reassurance. She nods along.

"Y-yes... shit.... right there.... ughhh... fuck me...". Bada turns to looks at the door with a sour expression, "but let's go, I refuse to listen to this shit any longer. Not when we can obviously make her moan way louder then that." Howl just smiles for a moment and nods, "exactly baby let's not feed into negatively. She will be ours by tomorrow night."

(See, I know yall are waiting on the mommy duties part 2 fic, but I just got sick as fuck and I feel like garbage. But I don't want yall to think I'm one of those writers that's coming up with a new excuse every week, so I will try my best to work on it, babes. Now tell me if yall feel like roommate pt.2 would be a good idea or nah?)

#swf2 #street woman fighter 2 #street woman fighter x reader #bada lee x reader #bada lee

[twistedwonderworm]

this is my first time doing a request but can you do a Bottom Leona x Male reader with smut if you haven't already?

Here you go bro, hope it's satisfactory!!! I have never written a fic this fast in my life.

Also you better fucking come home after this, Leona. Happy birthday motherfucker XDD

Pillow Prince (TWST NSFW)

Pairing: Leona Kingscholar x M!reader

Warnings: overstimulation, breeding kink, hair pulling, degradation, rough sex, dom reader, bratty, pillow prince Leona, multiple orgasms

Word count: 632

🦁🦁🦁🦁🦁

Appearances really were deceiving. Take Leona Kingscholar for example. Standing at least six feet tall with an intimidating glare, most people thought that the second prince of the Sunset Savanna could dominate just about anyone. Though, they don't know just how much of a brat he was and how much he loved it when Y/N put him in his place.

Leona's face was shoved into the pillow as Y/N pounded into him harshly. His hand was tangled in the beastman's hair, tugging on it occasionally to hear his partner's whines and pants.

"Look at you, begging for my cock to wreck you~" the human purred in Leona's ear, pulling his head out of the pillow again. Tears streamed down the housewarden's cheeks from the overstimulation he was enduring. The sheets were already filthy from him coming once, but with how much precum his twitching cock was drooling, Y/N knew he was going to be coming again soon.

Once he knew Leona was on the edge, he pulled out of him, ignoring Leona's irritated grumbles as he flipped the larger male onto his back. Leona's beautiful skin was glistening with sweat from the heat of the room and their… activities, and he was panting. His cock looked painfully hard, the sight making Y/N grin cruelly.

"How do you think the other Savanaclaw students would feel if they knew their housewarden was such a pillow princess~?" The human asked, his fingers teasing Leona's nipples, tugging and pinching them gently.

Leona mewled, but didn't answer his question, so Y/N decided to punish him by hiking his legs up onto his shoulders and plunging back into his tight heat. Leona threw his head back and nearly screamed in ecstasy at his boyfriend's rough, punishing pace. He had never known the human could move this fast, and his was loving it.

Y/N grinned as he fucked his boyfriend into the mattress. With a dorm full of beastmen with sensitive hearing, there was no doubt that they would be able to hear how much their housewarden liked a cock in his ass. Leona's body soon tensed up as he came with a scream, but of course the human didn't stop. If anything, he got faster, wanting to absolutely wreck him.

"I-it's too muchh…" the lion whimpered when Y/N reached between them and started jerking his cock again, "I-I cantt…"

Y/N grinned and cooed, "Of course you can, baby boy~ give me one more orgasm and then I'll fill your slutty little hole. I'll breed my little lion as long as he gives me one more orgasm~"

Leona panted and squirmed with the overstimulation, but he nodded. His moans were getting desperate now. Y/N was getting close now. Leona so good squeezing around him. He pushed the beastman's legs up against his chest, and started pounding into him harder.

Leona gasped and tried to grab something to hold onto, his hands fisting the sheets. They soon tore as a third, even more intense orgasm hit him, causing his vision to go out as he screamed out. His body clamped down around Y/N like a vice, and he pushed in deep as he burst inside, his seed painting Leona's insides white. Another whine from the overstimulated lion, but Y/N still ride out his orgasm before collapsing on top of him.

They lay together, sweaty and panting but satisfed. Leona nuzzled into Y/N's shoulder, and the other laughed at his cute behavior. He was always so snuggly after sex, especially after the more intense sessions.

"We should clean ourselves up, darling," Y/N said, but Leona answered with a snore. This just made the human laugh again, and he pulled him closer. A bath could wait then he supposed.

#horni worm #twisted wonderland #twst fanfic #smut #mxm romance #male reader #twst x male reader #x male reader #twst smut #leona kingscholar x reader #leona kingscholar

[skeletalgoats]

What was originally supposed to be an easy going pretend interrogation took a quick turn.

Horangi was supposed to go through a procedure with you if you were ever going to be held hostage and he was supposed to evaluate how well you did.

And let's just say you did a great job.

Tied up as he was behind your chair, his finger entering your folds while you felt breathless.

How well you did was based on whether or not you could keep quiet.

Slipping in another finger before quickly fingering you at an inhuman pace while you bit your lower lip trying to not let a sound out

His deep voice lowering into yours as his hand landed on your neck and lifted your head up with his finger

"You like that, huh?"

SMUT WARNING UP AHEAD

●☆●

INTERROGATION - HORANGI X READER

(FEMALE READER)

(So I saw that you were the bubble anon lmao)

BUT YES EXACTLY BRO HORANGI BEING THE HOT MOTHERFUCKER HE IS WOULD TOTALLY BE SUCH A TEASE.

He would literally finger you at an ungodly pace while kissing your neck and just to mess with you, he would make his voice extra deep and raspy, whispering things in your ear like

"yeah...that's a good girl, staying all quiet for me, letting me play around with that beautiful, soaking wet pussy.."

The lewd and wet sounds of his thick fingers thrusting in and out of you faster than you could ever imagine someone doing so.

He was so good with his fingers, such fast, deep, strokes with the 2 fingers that are being brutally shoved inside of you on repeat, he had your eyes rolling to the back of your head multiple times.

But the moment you let out even the smallest whimper, he's gonna edge you and slip those fingers out of that soaking core, no matter how quiet you were being before.

He would start tapping on your clit, slapping it lightly, letting out an exaggerated sigh before coming infront of you, crouching.

"Now what did I tell you?....Gonna be a good girl and stay quiet for me...?Or are you gonna be a bad one and let everyone know how good I make you feel?~"

He taps your cheek, smirking under his mask while fully knowing that he's driving you insane with all that he's doing.

You whimper and cry silently, begging for Horangi to continue and how you would be good for him.You spread your legs and buck your hips up, desperate for any kind of friction from him.

Horangi chuckles lightly before untying you, picking you up and pulling you on his lap as he sits on the chair.

He spreads your legs apart, but doesn't do anything just yet.

He let's the cold air hit your pussy, watching you shudder on his lap while he leave hickeys all over your neck, and collarbone.

Then without warning, shoves his 2 fingers back inside your heat, stroking the inside of your wet pussy.

"Go on, cum for me."

And with that,you're sent over the edge, cumming the hardest you ever have,throwing your head back, over his shoulder.

You're panting, unable to think properly...but despite all that you remember the next words you heard;

"How about another round?...maybe even this time I'll give you my cock?~"

At that moment you could say that it was going to be one hell of a night...

#call of duty #cod mw2 #horangi x reader #horangi cod #horangi #horangi x you #horangi smut #cod smut #cod x reader #cod x you #retro's asks #fem reader #female reader

[rowretro]

𝐓𝐨𝐱𝐢𝐜 𝐦𝐮𝐜𝐡?

✧warnings: toxic-ish themes, possessive Jake (I wrote this while I have a pretty high fever so if I do make any mistakes, please do tell me<3)

♡synopsis: You and Jake decided that you 2 deserved a break from all that overworking you do. People started to believe you were a boring couple, and that may have triggerred you. That's how Jake found himself, at the bar, with you and your so called friends.

✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧

Jake was all for a night of joy especially with y/n. The only times he ever found himself at a bar was when he was having business meetings with business men his father's age. However, now he was here with her. With some of her close friends. Close how? close physically and it fucking pissed him off.

How they often cling to her, throwing an arm around your neck, pulling you into their arms. How could he get mad at her? she's just too innocent, too naïve to even notice that these boys were practically hitting on her. They were throwing themselves at her at this point.

His grip on his glass tightened as he watched her smile and laugh with those boys, though he managed to keep his cool. He downed the drink in one gulp as he signalled to the bartender for another drink. Y/n suddenly got up from her seat "Babe im just going to head to the restroom" the girl said before placing a soft kiss on his forehead.

Jake smiled at her, his eyes immediately landing on the boys. Either he was drunk, which he definitely wasn't, or he just saw one of her so called friends, Mark, check you out. Now it made sense, he wasn't being overly possessive, or toxic, he was just being protective of you. Jake slammed his empty glass on the bar, making the boys flinch, but he didn't look at them once.

"I'm back~" y/n said with a smile, reaching out to hug Jake, only to be pulled by Mark "Hey how about we play a game of spin the bottle- those chicks invited us" He said pointing at a group of girls. The girl immediately got pulled away by Jake. "No. we're heading home." He simply said as Y/n shrugged.

Mark scoffed at Jake, not one bit bothered by how pissed Jake was. Now the girl was getting a little uncomfortable in the boys' presence, clutching onto Jake's hand. "I was asking y/n bro. No need to go all toxic mode, chill" he mumbled as Y/n stared in shock, Jake just chuckled. God how scary he truly was though he was doing something that wasn't so scary.

"You have quite a big mouth, matches those big eyes that keep ogling my girlfriend." Jake simply said softly pulling y/n behind him. "I suggest you shut that filthy motherfucking mouth of yours or else I'll fucking show you what I do to filthy fuckers like you." Jake threatened, as his hand balled into a fist, those rings and bracelets decorating his hands looking 10 times more painful.

The boys left within seconds as Y/n back hugged him. "I'm sorry babe... this night only got stressful, because of me... how could I make it up to you?" the girl asked as he turned around and kissed her forehead. "I just want to go home and sleep... lets snuggle" the male simply said, not wanting to be mad anymore.

✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧

#enhypen #enha x reader #enha imagines #enha yandere #jake enhypen #enhypen jake #sim jaeyun #sim jake #jake yandere #yandere enhypen #enhypen jaeyun #sim jake x reader #jaeyun yandere #jaeyun x reader #jaeyun imagines #jake imagines #jongseong yandere #explore #kpop fic #enha fanfic #enha ff #enhypen fanfiction #enhypen fic

[doe-eyed-fool]

Fallen {Chapter Sixteen}

Alastor x (Fem)Reader

"N-No..." I mutter. I didn't want anything to do with anymore overlords. Velvette scoffed. "Don't lie to me. I don't forget faces so easily. What the fuck is your name even?" She asks, putting a hand to her hip. My voice was shaky as I spoke. "Y/n."

"Hm. And how did you get so close to that old ass radio guy?" She raises an eyebrow. "He isn't exactly friendly. Don't tell me your his girlfriend or something." I quickly shake my head. "No! Nothing like that!"

"Then what is it? He just suddenly have a change of heart?" I took a hesitant step back. I really, really, didn't want to be having this conversation with Velvette of all people. As I moved, my back hit against something.

I look behind me to see Alastor. "Velvette. I'd appreciate it if you'd stop interrogating miss Y/n, here." Velvet scowled and crossed her arms. "Excuse me, but who the hell are you to order me around, old man?" Alastor's smile thinned. "Are the other two V's with you? Or are you just out looking to start trouble?"

Velvette scoffed, shifting her weight onto one foot. "No, just me. And if anyone is looking to start trouble, it's you. I'd watch yourself, oldie."

"Oh, he isn't so old." Came Rosie's voice as she joined Alastor's side. "Now, young lady, I suggest you go about your business. I'd hate for such a lovely café to be destroyed because of a slight...argument." There was a slight hiss in her voice towards the end.

Velvette glared at the two, Alator and Rosie returned the harsh stare. I felt my heart sink. Were they about to fight? And I would be caught up right in the middle!?

Thankfully Velvette backed off. "Whatever. I'm not wasting anymore time with you two fossils." She says as she walks past them. I sigh a breath if relief.

"My, I will never get use her attitude." Rosie says with a shake of her head. "Y/n, are you alright honey?" She asks me. I only nod my head. "Rosie, dear, I hate to cut our day short. But I'm afraid I have to get Y/n back to the hotel." Said Alastor.

Rosie waved her hand. "Oh don't worry. We can reschedule for another day, when the undesirables aren't roaming the streets."

"Of course." Alastor grins. "Shall I send your order to your residence?" Asked Rosie. Alastor nods his head. "Please do. Come long Y/n." He says, turning to me. I follow him silently.

"You two dipshits won't believe who I just ran into." Velvette says as she makes her way into Voxtek studios. The two "dipshits", she was referring too, were her fellow overlords. Valentino, and Vox. Vox, rolled his eyes before speaking. "Oh, do tell."

"Radio Bitch and his pal Grandma Rosie." She starts. "Not only them, but you remember that woman Alastor had with him at that ball? She was there too." Vox's previous disinterest quickly diminished, his look of surprise slowly turning sinister. "So, Alastor does have it in him to be friendly." He chuckles. "Now, what in the fuck could be so special about her?"

"Perhaps he's finally found someone who can get his rocks off." Valentino smirked. "Doubt it." Vox shrugs. "That motherfucker would kill someone for accidently brushing up against him."

"She might be just another dumbass who made a deal with him." Said Velvette. "But..." She mutters. "But?" Vox raises an eyebrow. "He did get awfully testy when I was "pestering" her." Velvette finishes. Vox laughed. "Oh don't tell me he's actually gotten attached! That's fucking precious!" Vox then smirks. "I think we all know what should be done now. Only question is, how are we going to do it?"

"How does she look?" Valentino asks. "You were there at the ball, how did you not see her?" Asked Velvette. Valentino just shrugs. Velvette rolls her eyes. "She's pretty decent looking, if you must know."

"Maybe I'll hit her up sometime. See if she's looking for work." Valentino chuckles lowly. "I'm always looking for new flesh."

"Gross." Velvette mutters. "Nah, I don't think we should do that. Not yet anyway." Vox spoke up. Valentino sighed. "Why?" He asked. "Use that brain of yours for once. If Alastor is as attached as we think he is, we could use that broad as leverage. Then, we do whatever the fuck with her after we get what we want." Vox explains.

"Also, Velvette, don't go spreading any word about this right away. We want to be sure before we actually go through with this." Velvette shrugs. "Whatever. I'm not trying to catch any flack for spreading misinformation, especially on something I don't really give a shit about."

"Think you can hold off too Val?" Asked Vox. Valentino nods. "For now."

"Then we're all in agreement." Vox smirks. "Better be ready Alastor, cause you're about to get royally fucked."

"I think I've had my fill with overlords." I mutter as Alastor and I approach the hotel. "That would be the third one you've met face to face. Fourth, if you include me. I understand, though, you're in hell now. You see us overlords everywhere." Alastor tells me.

"It will be one of the many things I will not miss when I leave this awful place." I say with a light sigh. Alastor went silent. As we made our way up the steps to the doorway, I look up at him. "How did you end up in hell?" I asked. Alastor glanced down at me.

"Are you sure you can handle the answer you'll get?" He says with a smirk. "I mean...I've been to a city full of cannibals and watched someone be murdered and devoured in the streets like it was nothing. I think I'll be fine." Alastor chuckles at my response. "Fair enough." He paused for a moment before speaking.

"I was a murder in my living days." Not surprising. "As well as a cannibal." Unnerving, but also not surprising. "My first kill was at the ripe age of twenty seven. Yes, I still remember it like it was yesterday." He said with a longing sigh. "Though, I didn't start the who cannibal thing until my third kill."

"How many did you kill exactly?" I ask, unsure if I really wanted to know the answer. "Got away with twelve, and unfortunately my fun was ended on my thirteenth."

"You were caught?" I tilt my head.

"I was killed." Alastor corrects. "Shot dead by a hunter. Right in the ol' bullseye!" He says, pointing to his forehead. "I see." I nod my head. "Alright, I told you how I died. I think it's only fair you tell me yours." Said Alastor.

We walk inside of the hotel and make our way through the halls. "It's...not a great death. You'd be bored." I mutter. "Come now, I'm sure it's not that bad." Alastor waved his hand. I look away from him before exhaling. "Fell down a flight of stairs. Broken neck." I mutter. "Is that right?" Alastor asks.

I nod, trying to fight back the tears gathering in my eyes. Unfortunately for me, Alastor noticed. "But that's not quite the full story?" I shake my head.

"It wasn't a fall...I was pushed." My voice cracked. "I see. Murder then." Alastor nods. "I assume you know who did it too."

"My fiancé. Only a month before we were going to get married too." Alastor stays quiet. "We...weren't in love. We never were. I thought we were, but...I was blinded by nice gestures and empty words. He convinced me he actually loved me, and in the end, it resulted in my death. I...kinda always knew it would too. And I knew he would be the cause of it...It's my own fault. I should have left sooner. It's like I was asking for him to do it."

"Nonsense."

I look up at Alastor, despite the sharpness in his tone. His expression was neutral. "What?"

"People can be deceiving. They'll break your heart and piece it all back together with the bare minimum. And sadly, it works in most cases. You're right. Unfortunately for you, and for many people, it can result in someone ending up dead."

"Alastor?"

"I believe this is your stop." I look ahead to see the door to my room. "Goodbye for now Y/n." Without another word, Alastor left. I only watched as he walked away.

#alastor x reader #hazbin hotel alastor #hazbin hotel #alastor #hazbin hotel spoilers #hazbin spoilers #hazbin hotel rosie #hazbin rosie #rosie #hazbin hotel velvette #hazbin velvette #velvette #hazbin vox #hazbin hotel vox #vox #valentino #valentino hazbin hotel #the vees

[daedalusdavinci]

24. superbat. this motherfucker JUST got to bed if any of u assholes wake him UP

24. Protecting your lover’s sleep as they doze on your lap, making sure nobody bothers them as they entrusted their peace to you. thinking about.... jlas superbat. i may not have followed this prompt to the letter but its very long so you get what you get at this point

It was just one of those days- one of those nights- one of those weeks- where one problem shifted right into the next without break, and they all found themselves running more ragged than usual. In the tower, heroes everywhere seemed sluggish and exhausted, running low on sleep and worn out from the last battle. Diana had tipped onto a couch and hadn't gotten back up again, and Wally had nearly passed out in the cafeteria, starting awake and drifting off again in the middle of a burger. After being pried away from the monitors, J'onn had gone straight to his room to sleep, and there were countless others who had followed his example.

Bruce was too stubborn. Clark was reasonably sure he'd been awake longer than anyone, but Clark could still see him typing away, doing god even knew what.

"I'll sleep when I finish," he said, before Clark had even said anything.

"I wasn't going to tell you to sleep," Clark said, taking that as his cue to approach.

"Yes, you were."

"I know better." Clark set a hand on the back of Bruce's chair, glancing briefly over the monitors. Logs, security feed, news reports- all of it a huge mess of information to sort through. Someone had to do it, but that someone didn't need to be Bruce.

Bruce looked tired. His shoulders sagged and his fingers hesitated, slow on the keys. He'd been drooping all day, attacking everything with the energy of a man on his very last leg. He'd sustained too many injuries during the fight. He'd been slow, and sloppy. He needed to sleep, but he'd never let Clark talk him into it if Clark let on that that was what he was doing.

"Can you do all this from anywhere?" Clark asked.

Bruce blinked slowly. "Not from anywhere."

"But from another computer."

"Yes. I have others."

"A laptop?"

"Yes." Bruce was eyeing him with suspicion, now, leaning back in his chair.

"Then you're doing it from there," Clark decided. "You can burn your retinas to your heart's content- I won't stop you. But I need company."

For a long moment, Bruce looked at him. Clark could practically hear the gears turning as he thought it over, taking longer to consider it than he usually would in his exhaustion. Then, finally, his gaze softened. He sighed, slumping back in his chair and rubbing his hands over his face. "Just don't watch one of your stupid cooking shows while I work."

"They're not stupid," Clark protested.

"Whatever." Bruce waved a hand, pushing himself up out of the chair. He hit a few more buttons, and the monitors condensed into the smallest screen, allowing Bruce to pull it off of its docking station. "Lead the way."

The tower had grown quiet and still with sleeping heroes. With his hearing, Clark could hear Booster and Ted's laughter from the cafeteria, but everywhere else had turned muffled and heavy with the air of sleep. People murmured back and forth to avoid waking up sleeping heroes in the commons, and most of the sleeping quarters were occupied. Somewhere, Wally got ready to portal home, while somewhere else, Oliver snored loudly. No one passed them on their way to Clark's room.

It was easy to get stuck on the fringes of his senses, listening to everything instead of whatever was closest. The need to keep an ear out for danger hadn't quite abided yet, and it left Clark feeling unmoored and anxious. Normally, it was a nuisance, but maybe this time it'd keep him awake long enough that Bruce would sleep first.

It was almost too easy to pile on his couch with Bruce. Normally, any attempt at getting Bruce to accept even a mediocrum of comfort resulted in a fight, but he sat without prompting, eyes never leaving his tablet. He didn't complain when Clark flopped down with a heap of blankets, even when Clark twisted to lean against the arm, swinging his legs across Bruce's lap. Somehow, they settled in like that; Bruce, on his tablet, and Clark, half-watching some nature show that was interesting enough, but not so interesting that it offended Bruce's sensibilities.

As the narrator droned on, Clark struggled to narrow in his focus. The lights from the TV flickered colors across the dark room, and it felt so quiet, surrounded by the suffocating vacuum of space. If he strained hard enough, he knew he could hear Earth, but he tried not to. He could feel each individual fiber of each blanket, and each snore in the building. The tap of Bruce's finger against the screen of his tablet felt obscenely loud. The constant shifting of his attention and the overwhelming amount of stimulus was exhausting, and he could feel himself sagging under it, so worn out that it was hard to hear the words coming from the TV. He rubbed his face, running through grounding exercises in his head to no avail. He wasn't sleeping, at least.

Bruce's hand came to rest on his knee. The pressure of it was enough to shock Clark out of his thoughts, but light, and gentle. Bruce hadn't looked up from his tablet, but his thumb tracked back and forth absently.

Slowly, Clark relaxed back into the couch again. His eyes fixed on the TV, but without really registering the pictures. He couldn't feel every fiber in the blankets, or hear every snore, but he was suddenly hyper-aware of that weight on his knee- a single point of focus that he locked on helplessly. It wasn't constant- every now and again, Bruce lifted his hand to tap the screen- but it always returned. Somehow, that caught Clark's attention more, leaving him waiting, expectant, caught on every detail of Bruce. The bracing warmth of Bruce's legs under his own, the vaguely ticklish stroke of his thumb, his breathing, steady and slow. Out of habit more than anything, he found Bruce's heartbeat, listening to the low thump of it until it felt like his own had slowed in turn. The familiarity of it was soothing, safe, protected, the reliability of the Batman unexpectedly grounding after so long.

His head slipped off his hand, and he started, eyes opening. He hadn't realized he'd closed them.

"Seems like I'm not the only one trying to stay up," Bruce commented.

"I'm not," Clark said. Although, maybe he was. He frowned through the haze of exhaustion, trying to focus on the TV.

"The life and death of a sea star are just that riveting," Bruce said, teasing under the deadpan.

"Shut up," Clark muttered, and shifted again, re-propping up his elbow on the arm of the couch.

It was difficult to understand how Bruce stayed awake. Without the cowl, the bags under his eyes were dark and deep, his expression something beyond exhausted. And yet, even now, wrapped up in blankets and secluded in the quiet comfort of Clark's room, listening to the soothing drone of a documentary, he tapped at that stupid tablet. Clark was beginning to doubt his ability to outlast him. The restless discomfort that had kept him awake earlier- his ace in the hole against Bruce's stubbornness- was fading into a sleepy warmth all too quickly.

And then, Bruce started to hum.

Clark could count on the fingers of one hand how many times he'd heard Bruce sing. Diana had once told him that Bruce had a voice so beautiful it could make a villain weep, but Clark had only ever heard it rarely, and never meant for him. It was a quiet lullaby, murmured to a baby that wouldn't stop crying as Clark searched for the mother, or a hum, pressed against Robin's hair in the aftermath of fear toxin. It had always felt like something he wasn't meant to hear. Now, through the ridiculous fog of exhaustion, Clark thought of sirens, calling soothingly to sailors from a distance.

Bruce's humming was soft and low, just under his breath. The tune was impossible to place, but haunting, and mournful. The sound of it seemed to vibrate through Clark, blanketing his senses until all he could focus on was just Bruce. Bruce was warm. He was safe, and close, and so confusingly present, as reliable as the tide. Time seemed to turn fluid, listening to that soft song, and Clark's eyes closed without his permission, just listening.

When Clark next opened his eyes, it was dark. The TV was off, Bruce's tablet forgotten somewhere in the tangle of blankets. His neck should've ached from the arm of the couch, but his head was on the cushions, propped up by a pillow. How Bruce had pulled that off without waking him, he had no idea.

Bruce was a warm weight against his chest, breathing slow. Judging by the awkward positioning, Clark doubted he'd meant to fall asleep, knees still jammed under Clark's own and cape still on. One of his hands was tucked against Clark's side, his face hidden between his own shoulder and Clark's sternum. It was... sweet, really. To have Bruce feel comfortable enough to sleep was a unique privilege, and one rarely afforded.

Clark hadn't outlasted him, in the end. But Bruce was sleeping, and as Clark let his eyes drift shut again, he allowed himself to consider it a win.

#superbat #superman #batman #bruce wayne #clark kent #tumblr drabbles #justice league animated series #justice league unlimited #asks #ashysiashy #uno reverse card clark gets taken care of trying to take care of somebody #i think he needs it. #its good for him #anyway idk if this is a good place to end this but im sick of looking at it and i have other prompts to get to

[animexts]

𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐨𝐮 | 𝐒𝐡𝐮𝐣𝐢 𝐇𝐚𝐧𝐦𝐚

S: Hanma wouldn't accept any bastard harassing his Y/n.

P: Shuji Hanma X Fem!Reader

WC: 864

W: Mentions of harassment, of beatings, well it's a fic about Hanma so...

───────────────────────────

English is not my first language, so I’m sorry for any mistakes.

"Holy shit, Hanma what did you do?"

Hanma's girlfriend (Wife in his head) says as she approaches him, where he is with some other bonten members.

"Look if it's not my beautiful wife." He says with a cheeky smile on his face as he blows smoke out of her mouth.

"I'm not your fucking wife!"

"Let's not get into this couple fight, let's go boys." Sanzu He says leaving the room and taking the guys with him.

"Now my love, what happened?"

Hanma asks looking at his girlfriend with an angry expression and her hair a little messy.

Man she is a goddess

"Did you hit my co-worker Hanma?"

"Yes, I spanked."

Y/n looked at him puzzled.

He's not even denying...

"What the fuck Hanma"

"Do you think I didn't realize how sad you were when you got back of the service?" Hanma says bringing her face closer to Y/n's.

"I was going to tell you..."

"When? When he did something worse? If that happened honey I'd kill him right away"

"Hanma thought you had to try not to get into more trouble."

"And I thought you and I were partners and told each other everything."

Hanma says brushing her lips against Y/n's feeling the taste of her gloss.

Y/n trusts Hanma, but she doesn't want him always beating up people because of her (even if they deserve it sometimes)

"Hanma I love you, but I don't want to be the reason people die." She talks crossing her arms and Hanma rolls her eyes.

"He's not dead is he?" Hanma asks and takes another drag on his cigarette.

"Shuji." Y/n whimpers and he smiles at the sight.

“Baby don't do that, just looking at you makes me excited.”

“You're unbelievable!” Y/n I did slapping Hanma's chest, but before she pulls her hand away, he grabs it and pulls her closer.

"I know you don't like this, but what you're asking me is basically to stop protecting you, and that I could never do." Hanma says it seriously for the first time.

"I love you for that, but you could warn them before you send them to the hospital." Y/n smiles and Hanma kisses her mouth.

"Alright, I'll try that next time."

"Promise?" Y/n says raising her little finger.

"Promise." Hanma intertwines his finger with hers and kisses her to seal the promise.

"And how did you know it was him?"

"I had my way."

The way

"He's the one I saw Hanma" Sanzu says pointing to the boy about his age leaving the restaurant.

"Alright, let's go." Hanma drops the cigarette butt on the floor and confidently walks over to the boy who widens his eyes when she sees Hanma and his henchmen heading towards him.

"You come with me motherfucker." Hanma says pulling the boy behind the restaurant and throwing him on the floor.

"Is this a robbery? you want my money or something, take it." He says throwing his wallet on the floor making Hanma and the guys laugh.

"I don't want your fucking money." Hanma says taking off her coat.

"This must be a mistake, I didn't do anything."

"Oh but you did!" Hanma takes out his cell phone and squats down to his height.

"You know her don't you?" Hanma asks showing her cell phone's lock screen, which contained a picture of Y/n smiling at the camera.

"I work with her but…I don't even talk to her or anything-".

"Are you fucking lying to me?"

"I'm not! I don't even know this bitch well." When he says that, Sanzu laughs uncontrollably

"You're fucked up!" He says still laughing.

"She is my wife." Hanma says close to his face and the boy's eyes widen.

"I didn't mean it I-"

"Now that you've found out her husband is about to kill you isn't she a bitch anymore? I think you're just a son of a bitch anyway."

"Let's kill him and get this over with." Sanzu says with a maniacal smile on his face, and the boy looks at him in despair.

"I didn't do anything, please let me go."

"Didn't fucking do anything? That's not what Sanzu told me."

"I didn't even touch her I just-"

"Oh yes you did, I saw you slap her ass more than three times." Sanzu says approaching.

"How did you see that?" The boy says terrified.

"I always keep an eye on her you bastard, you're not the first and I'm sure you won't be the last." Hanma says standing up smiling.

"Well you have a hot girl Hanma." Sanzu says laughing to Hanma who looks at him seriously.

"Want to be the next to die Sanzu?" Sanzu raises his hands in yield.

"This won't happen again I promise-" The boy says already with tears streaming down his face.

"It really won't." Hanma smiles.

So for the thirty minutes, all that could be heard was the noises of punches and kicks at the boy.

"That's enough Sanzu." Hanma says pushing Sanzu who hit the boy too.

"Let's kill him Hanma!"

"No…I promised Y/n I wouldn't do that anymore.

#hanma x you #hanma x reader #tokyo rev x you #mikey tokyo revengers #mikey x reader #baji x reader #ran haitani

[jungle-angel]

Dude, Where's My Underwear? (Frat!Rhett Abbott x Reader)

Summary: Rhett has a royal freak out after a Friday night rager at the frat house and literally no one can remember what happened

Warnings: Frat life, waking up with an unholy hangover, reader missing her underwear, implied orgies etc.

Tagging: @floydsmuse @attapullman @sebsxphia @bradleybeachbabe

Notes: RIP Toby Keith, without "Red Solo Cup" I never would've gotten the idea for this fic (lol).

Rhett slowly blinked his eyes open, his vision blurred even as he rubbed away the sleepy grog.

The house was a fucking shithouse mess.

Everybody who was too drunk to stumble home had passed out on the floor with everything in disarray. Red solo cups were strewn everywhere along with a bunch of pool noodles, fading glow sticks, empty bottles and a huge pile of cans that had built up in the living room. Not since him and the rest of his Delta Tau brothers had cleaned up a notorious hoarder den off campus, had he ever seen a shithouse mess like this.

The light from the kitchen and living room windows had hit him with the white hot intensity of a thousand exploding suns, his head throbbing at the sight of it. It took everything in Rhett's power not to puke as he crawled towards the coffee table where his phone began vibrating.

"Aw fuck," he groaned when he felt his stomach lurch. It took him a minute to settle, but when he finally did, he picked up his phone and saw your contact picture.

"Hi baby," he croaked.

"You ok?" you chuckled.

"Debatable," he answered. "Where are you?"

"I'm at the grocery store," you answered. "You need anything?"

"Some Tylenol and the will to live would be great babes."

You laughed a little bit. "Alright I'll bring it over and make everybody a hangover breakfast," you told him. "Just promise me one thing though?"

"What's up?"

"No more Friday night ragers until finals are done?"

"I make no such promises sweetpea," he chuckled.

You laughed again knowing that him and his brothers would probably be doing it all again at some point or another. "Oh before you go," you said. "I'm gonna run to Wal Mart and get some extra supplies and some clean clothes. I'm missing a pair of panties and I have no idea where they went."

Rhett suddenly clenched his lip, his eyes practically bugging out of his head when you hung up.

"MOTHERFUCKER!!!!!!!" he suddenly blurted out.

The pile of empty beer cans suddenly slid to the floor, clattering and clanking as Kayce rose up out of it. "Good God what a battle," he groaned. "Are there any survivors?"

"Kayce get the fuck up!!" Rhett blurted out.

"The fuck's wrong with you?" Kayce asked, running his hands over his groggy face.

"I can't find (y/n)'s panties anywhere!"

"And this is a problem why?"

"Because the last thing I want is fuckin Smitty gettin his hands on'em," Rhett told him. "That piggly little rich asshole has been after (y/n) since she started here and I'm not about to let him claim anything I've already marked."

"Dude ya'll sound like a male cat during mating season," Kayce laughed.

"I'm serious Kayce!!" Rhett blurted out. "I've gotta find her underwear and I swear if that slimy little piece of snail cum has'em......"

"Bruh did ya'll happen to look on the turtle tank?"

Rhett's gaze turned to the turtle tank near the couch. Sure enough, there they were, a pair of red lace skivies, haphazardly thrown onto the little rock inside.

"Aw fuck," Rhett laughed. "You poor little guys, I'm so sorry."

He gave Speedy, the little brown tortoise and his female mate, a few pets on the shells, letting them lean their heads into his palm. Rhett was surprised their terrarium had survived the rager but duly made a note to have one of the freshman in the dorms take them for the weekend the next time they held a rager.

He had been about to reach in and grab the pair of underwear when Speedy somehow picked them up and stretched his little head, giving the panties to Rhett.

"I have never fuckin seen'em do that before," Kayce laughed.

"Ya'll got it on video?"

"Fuck yeah I did."

Despite the nasty hangovers, the boys made an effort to try and get some sunshine into the house. You rang the doorbell a minute later with you and two other girls from the Phi Gamma sorority, coming in, your arms full of groceries for the best hangover breakfast you could possibly make.

"Oh my God this place looks like a tornado ran through here," you laughed.

"We'll get it cleaned up sweetheart," Rhett assured you. "For now I've gotta get these assholes up."

It was a Herculean task to say the least. So many people were dead drunk in every corner of the house that Rhett was half tempted to go around with the ship's bell in the kitchen and wake everyone up. Bo had passed out in the living room with at least two other idiots having used him as a pillow, Kyle was still asleep under the coffee table, Cody was right under a window with Wes not far by. Ravi had passed out upstairs with at least three other girls and Foster had passed out in his room with his boyfriend. The newly accepted pledges were mostly in the basement while others had taken to whatever space they could find.

You cracked a few eggs into the freshly buttered pan on the stove, the sizzling loud enough to rouse a few of Rhett's brothers from their deep sleep. The whole kitchen soon smelled of eggs, bacon, sausage toast and pitch black coffee that was sure to soak up all the booze from the night before.

"Thank you baby," Rhett mumbled, wrapping both his arms and the heavy couch blanket around you and pressing a kiss to your cheek.

"You're welcome," you chuckled kissing him back.

"Still can't remember what the hell we did last night," he croaked, rubbing his eyes.

"Did anybody take any video evidence?" asked Jessica, Bo's girlfriend from the sorority.

"I think Foster was the only one sober enough to remember," Rhett chuckled.

Foster came stumbling down the kitchen steps a split second later, hungover like the rest of them. "Oh my God, never again," he groaned.

"Your boyfriend still upstairs?" Rhett asked him.

"Yeah he was the only one sober enough to remember what happened last night," Foster answered. "Oh wait a sec....."

Foster checked his phone and sure enough, there was an unread message from his boyfriend. "Oh fuck," he said nervously.

"Wassup?" Kayce asked him.

"You guys are gonna wanna see this."

You plated Foster's breakfast before joining Rhett at the table, watching the video evidence unfold from last night. Your jaw dropped, trying to keep in the laughter of everyone's drunken shenanigans. You couldn't contain it anymore when you heard the drunken frat boys singing "Red Solo Cup" like a bunch of screeching seagulls and saw a bunch of girls throwing their underwear all over the room.

You looked at Rhett who sheepishly handed you your skivies. "I was gonna wash'em later with everybody's clothes," he told you.

You kissed him again. "No need Rhett, you're good."

And indeed he was good.

#rhett abbott #rhett abbott x reader #frat!rhett #frat!rhett abbott #frat!rhett abbott x reader #outer range