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milla-frenchy · 6 months

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Deja vu

2k9 | Joel Miller x fem reader Summary: after a bad experience with a former boyfriend, you meet Joel who makes you trust him fully in the bedroom Warnings: 18+ mdni. Dead dove - dark - noncon Footjob and jerking off in public (restaurant), drug added to alcohol without reader's knowledge, mutual masturbation, oral (f receiving), unprotected piv, dirty talk, degradation, ass play, rimming, ignored safe word, anal, manipulation, lies, creampie, forced orgasm No age specified, no outbreak a/n: Thank you @romana-after-dark for this dead dove december 🤌 Thank you @not-a-unique-snowflake-blog for correcting me, and for the depraved ideas on this one, again 😏💕🫂 Heed the warnings. If any of this makes you uncomfortable, do not pursue reading. This fic isn't for everyone, and that's ok. I don't condone any of this. Follow @millafics and turn notifications on for fics updates

Read on ao3 | Masterlist

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You and Joel have been seeing each other for a few weeks. You met during Thanksgiving at the Adlers’, his neighbors, who were your distant relatives. You exchanged phone numbers, and he called you back a few days later. He was charming, magnificent, polite, and gallant.

And great in bed. He proved it to you orgasm after orgasm, whether with his tongue, his fingers or his cock. He was generous and attentive to your pleasure, before his own. It was like you had found the perfect person, sexually.

You talked a lot about your desires, your fantasies, you discussed them before realizing them, and you had put in place a safe word. In a few weeks, you were more confident with him than you had ever been with any other man, and this complicity, this closeness, made you want to give him more and more.

A few rare practices had been put aside, whether categorically, or “perhaps one day”. One of those “perhaps” was anal. You had a bad experience in the past, a former boyfriend who was too pushy, to whom you hadn't been able to say no, who hadn't taken your discomfort into account, and until now you had never wanted to try again.

You had talked to Joel about this experience and he had been understanding, as usual. He had reassured you by telling you that if you ever did it, it would be when you were completely confident.

He had introduced you to rimming, and you loved it so much that since then he did it regularly. You also realized that you took even more pleasure when he pressed one of his fingers against your ass while he fucked you, or even when he pushed one of them lightly in it.

Once, he brushed his cock against your ring, and it turned you on. He asked you if you felt ready to try, and you answered yes, because you really thought so. He had prepared you, eating your ass for a long time, and the moment he squeezed his cock and started thrusting in, you got scared. You thought about this previous experience and used your safe word. He had stopped immediately, caressing your cheek, and thrusting slowly in your pussy, whispering in your ear that it was ok, that your pussy was enough for him, felt so good and gave him so much pleasure.

He had been so understanding and gentle that since then he had eaten your ass again, touched it, and you still loved it just as much, without apprehension. You told yourself that one day this blockage would go away, and you’d be capable of more.

One evening, you went out to a restaurant and during the meal you thought about one of his fantasies: a footjob. You took off your shoe and moved your foot up his calf, before placing it on his knee.

He smiled and said “what are you doin’, sweetheart?”

You smiled innocently at him, sliding your foot along the inside of his thigh, before coming to place it delicately against his already swollen crotch. You heard him groan from across the table, and you smiled again, a little less innocently this time.

You stroked his cock through his pants and he passed his hand under the table, placing it on your ankle, accompanying your movement.

“You’re a naughty girl, baby… taking advantage of me in a public place, when I can't do anything.”

“Oh, that’s a shame, Mr. Miller,” you replied, drinking your cocktail through a straw. He looked down at your lips and you saw his Adam's apple contract with difficulty.

He moved his hand under your ankle and lifted your foot slightly, while he unzipped his pants with his other hand, and pulled out his cock.

He had rested your foot on it, and you felt his skin under your sole. You stroked his cock, and all you could think about was making him cum, right in the middle of this restaurant. So you dropped your other heel, and your foot came to join the first, grabbing his cock in between. Slowly, you began jerking him, his eyes fixed on you. You said softly and slowly so that he could read your lips “come for me”. But you didn't have time to make him cum with just your feet without the risk of attracting attention, so he released your ankle and grabbed his cock, starting to jerk off while your feet continued to move slightly up and down his shaft.

He sped up the movement of his wrist and you placed one of your feet slightly lower, on his balls. Just before he came, he held your feet against him, preventing you from removing them. His jaw clenched so hard that you couldn't help but smile, as you felt his cum leak onto your skin.

In the car on the way to Joel's, he patted your knee as you were driving. You looked at him and asked “so… did you like it?” smiling mischievously.

“You, little brat, made me cum like a teenage boy.”

“Yeah you came soooo quickly… my feet still remember it.”

He laughed and said “it was perfect, sweetheart. But I’ll make up for it soon.”

“Oh really? And what do you have planned?”

“You’ll know soon enough.” You looked at him, his charming smile made you fall for him, and you stepped on the accelerator to get to his house a little faster.

Once the front door closed behind you, Joel grabbed you and pulled you against him, gripping your ass with both hands.

“Mmmm you smell so good” he said, his nose buried in your neck.

You put your arms around his shoulders, and you felt the shivers run through your body. You loved feeling his torso against you, surrounded by his arms, him leaning slightly towards you.

“Go wait for me in the bedroom, I’ll be there in 2 minutes while I bring us something to drink.”

You sat down on the bed and a few seconds later he arrived with two glasses of champagne. He handed one to you and took a few sips. You did the same, enjoying what you recognized as your favorite champagne while your eyes were fixed on each other.

You told him to take off his clothes, and you watched him do so, crossing your legs and taking another sip of champagne. He unbuttoned his shirt and took it off, undid his belt and slid it down his waist then let it fall to the floor. He paused and you nodded, mentioning him to continue. He unzipped his jeans and grabbed his bulge with one hand, stroking himself through the fabric.

“Why don’t you finish that glass of champagne, baby, so you can slip your fingers into your panties?”

You smiled, finished your glass and placed it on the floor, pulled your dress up to your waist, before spreading your thighs and slipping your hand into your panties, reaching your already soaked pussy.

“Go ahead baby, stroke your clit.”

You moved your wet finger up to your clit and gently swirled it over it, and said “take your cock out, Joel. I wanna see you jerking off.”

He pulled his pants and boxers down to mid-thighs, and his cock pointed upwards. He spat in his hand and started jacking off, his gaze moving from your panties to your eyes.

“Take your panties off now, I wanna see your pussy dripping for me.”

You took them off and he added “let me see her, sweetheart.”

You spread your legs wide, and pushed your index and middle fingers into your pussy again, before running your index finger over your clit. You groaned from the shivers you felt and leaned your head back.

“Fuck, I wanna taste you,” he said, removing his clothes completely. You removed your dress and bra, and climbed back up to the top of the bed. He lay down between your legs, his forearms surrounding your thighs. He lapped you from your wet hole all the way to your clit.

“So wet for me, baby.”

He pushed two fingers into your pussy, wrapping his lips around your clit to suck on it. His tongue came rolling over your clit.

“You taste so good”, he said. He looked down at his fingers digging into your pussy.

“I love the way you look when I fuck you with my fingers.”

“Fuck, Joel…”

You grabbed your breasts in your hands and bit your lip, just as his tongue caressed your clit again. He took his fingers out and spread your folds with his thumbs, watching your wetness trickle down to your ass.

“Can I eat your ass, sweetheart? I just… I wanna feel it under my tongue. You know how I love it.”

You looked at him and nodded.

“Answer me, sweetheart. I need to hear it.”

“Yes Joel, do it. I want it.”

“Tell me the safe word, baby.”

“It’s purple.”

"Good. If you want to stop, you say so. And I’ll stop immediately. You trust me?”

“Fully, Joel.”

He looked down at your pussy, its folds still spread with his thumbs. He pushed his tongue inside and fucked you with it, one thumb now rubbing lightly over your clit. You spread your thighs as far as you could, your hands resting on his head. The tip of his tongue trailed down to your ass, pressing against that tight ring. He softened it, going up to your pussy a few times while his thumb continued to caress your clit.

“Fuck, sweetheart, I love it so much. So much.”

He pressed his tongue against your ass again, which was beginning to open. The tip entered it and you loved that feeling. You trusted Joel, and your body was much more relaxed with him than with the other men you had known. You knew he wouldn't force it, that he was attentive to you, and your mind allowed your body to relax.

“You like that, don’t you, baby?”

“Yes, Joel, I love it.”

He licked from your ass to your clit, and pushed two fingers into your pussy again.

“You’re gonna cum for me, sweetheart? You’re gonna let this little pussy scream for me?”

“Y… Yes. Come suck my clit, please. Make me cum.”

He placed his tongue on your clit, and pushed the third finger into your pussy. As he swirled your clit under his tongue, he pulled the ring finger out and slid it to your tight hole, pressing on it lightly. His finger went in easily, and the sensations felt in three places simultaneously made you cum on his tongue.

He accompanied you with his tongue and fingers until your moaning stopped, your fingers gradually releasing their pressure in his hair. He knelt down for a few moments and said “you’re so beautiful all spread out like this…I’m gonna fuck you now.”

He moved up to your face and kissed you. You loved feeling your taste on his tongue. He pushed his fingers into your mouth, then put his hand on your pussy, and fingered you again.

“You’re so fuckin’ wet for me. You want my cock, baby?”

You didn't answer him right away, you felt a little weird. As if slightly feverish.

“Baby?”

“Yes, sorry… I felt a little strange but it’s alright now…”

“Did you have such a good orgasm, sweetheart?” he asked you, laughing.

You smiled, before responding “yeah… fuck me Joel, please.”

He took his cock in his hand, pressed it against your entrance and thrusted in with one slow movement.

“Oh god, Joel… it’s so good.”

“Yeah…This tight pussy couldn’t wait anymore to get fucked, didn’t she?”

“Mmmm yeah…” you replied, and he pulled his pelvis back before thrusting in again, still slowly. Your pussy was gradually getting used to his size, and you put your legs around his waist so he could thrust deeper.

“You feel so good, sweetheart”, he said, setting a faster pace, and your fingers dug into his shoulders every time he bottomed out.

He stopped after a few minutes, and said “on all fours, baby.” You turned around and the feeling came over you again.

“I feel a little weird again…”

“It must be the champagne. It’ll be fine, don’t worry.”

He grabbed your hip with one hand, his cock with the other, and thrusted into you. Something was wrong. You saw everything through a layer of fog, but the pleasure you felt taking his cock was too great to stop.

“That’s so good, baby. You take my cock so well.”

You moaned, and he said “I’m gonna play with your ass a little bit. OK, baby? You know how you cum harder, when my thumb is buried in your ass.”

"Yeah….I do."

He dropped his saliva on your ass, and his thumb came to rest, before quickly digging in. He held it down, as he now fucked you harder. You were having trouble thinking. You felt that you were experiencing pleasure, but the realization of no longer managing the sensation made you uncomfortable.

“Joel? I really don’t feel good.”

“It’s ok baby… Just a little bit more, okay?”

“Okay…” you replied, but without really being aware of what you were saying. You struggled to stay on your hands, and you bent your elbows to rest on your forearms.

“Yeah? Wanna feel me deeper? Such a good slut for me.”

He groaned, thrusting deep into you, his thumb still in your ass, feeling that you were more and more absent from what was happening.

“Wait for me, sweetheart, I’ll be right back.”

He got up from the bed and you could barely make out what was happening.

“Joel…”

“I’m here, baby.”

He came back to kneel behind you and you vaguely heard the sound of a bottle opening. You felt like sometimes you were falling asleep, unable to stop your eyes from closing.

“Joel?”

“I’m right here, sweetheart.”

You felt his fingers on you, behind, but with such a vague impression that you couldn't formalize what he was doing. His cock pressed against you again but the feeling was different. And he pushed.

“Joel, what…what are you doing?”

“What do you mean? I’m fucking your pussy baby… fuck… I’m just… Oh shit… that’s good.”

“No, Joel, stop it please. I feel really weird.”

“Shhh. It’s ok. Keep takin’ my cock like that… Fuck.”

“No, Joel… Pur… purple!”

You heard him growl, and he didn’t stop. Why didn’t he stop?

You felt him pushed all the way in. But it wasn’t in your pussy, despite what he told you. The feeling was too different. You tried to concentrate, to understand what was happening. He pulled back, then sank in harder, and pain shot through your body. His movements sped up and he said “fuck yeah! Just a little harder. Fuck, that’s good.”

“Stop… stop please, you’re hurting me…” you said in such a low voice as your mind and body were drained of all energy, unable to rebel or defend yourself mentally or physically.

“I know. Shut up now. Let me fuck that ass.”

You could no longer stand on your limbs and you fell flat on the bed. He lay on top of you and continued to pound you. His mouth against your ear, he whispered “I’ve been waiting for so long to fuck this ass. Shit… way too long, you have no idea.”

He kept thrusting while you moaned.

“Now you’re takin’ it like a good girl. Like a fuckin’ whore. Oh fuck, that’s good, that hole is so tight. You squeeze my cock so well. Your pussy’s good but fuck… this ass?”

He growled, and your mind drifted further and further away.

"You like that? I bet you do. You can finally get your little slut’s ass fucked.”

He groweld and added “fuck I’m gonna cum. I'm gonna shoot my cum in your tight ass, fuck!”

He came inside you, as you moaned under his movements. He pulled out, and spread your ass cheeks to look at your open ass dripping with his cum. He grabbed you to flip you onto your back and spread your legs, coming to lick your pussy.

“ ’m gonna make you come again.”

He ran his tongue from your pussy to your ass, licking up his spend.

“Can’t leave you with this cum leaking out of your ass, can I?”

You moaned, your body responding to his tongue. You no longer had any awareness of what was happening, you felt no pain. Just the pleasure building. And you kept moaning, feeling uncomfortable but not knowing why.

“Just let it happen, baby. Cum for me.”

You came, while he told you that you were a good little slut, always cumming for him when he wanted you to, and now ready to get fucked in all your holes by his big cock.

In the morning, you woke up when Joel was still asleep, turned towards you. You had a terrible headache. You got up to go take some painkillers and came back to bed. Joel woke up when you lay down.

“Are you alright, sweetheart?”

“I have a headache, and just vague memories of last night, after the restaurant. It’s so strange."

"You don’t remember? I guess the champagne hit too hard. Don’t worry about it”, he replied.

“No, I really don’t. That’s so weird.”

“It’s ok, baby, you're probably just a little tired”, he added, kissing your forehead.

You held yourself against him, waiting for the headache to dissipate.

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Thank you for reading 🙏

Comments and reblogs are greatly appreciated ❤️

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magnus-rhymes-with-swagness · 1 year

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nimona stopping a spinning saw with her arm and not seeming to get hurt foreshadows the way her shapeshifting powers allow her to heal quickly in this essay i will-

#nimona #nimona 2023 #nimona netflix #netflix #nimona movie #and to be safe #nimona spoilers #my words #sorry i used the wrong image ignore that

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bihanspookies · 3 months

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Tagged by: @thesingularityseries

Tagging (if you want 💅): @malicedragoness @theelderhazelnut @valyrra @luna-di-fuoco

#mk alora #alora #she only ignored the safe word bc she didn’t hear them say it 💀#shes very much a ‘hit it and quit it’ girly shfhshdbbs #she likes to be in control a majority of the time #alora: tagged

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eroticcannibal · 1 year

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Regarding that whole terf being like "I can totes tell which is a real vulva just by looking at it" thing, people are covering the transmisoginy but I've noticed no one is talking about how anti-porn views are playing into how this terf views bodies

Like, their is clearly a reactionary "only bigger inner labia are real, everything is surgical" thing going on here which obviously stems from the (legitimate!) Complaints about lack of genital diversity in porn (and inner labia size was a huge point of discussion a few years back). And like, radfems being radfems, decided at the time that the appropriate response was to decide anyone with this more favoured-by-mainstream-porn kind of vulva are evil and should be mocked and probably got surgery (even if they didnt) which makes them a traitor to women etc etc

And this is not to say that this specific instance is actually an attack on anyone but trans women (though the "real vs fake women" narrative *is* something also applied to sex workers of any gender, including cis women, by radfems) but rather I feel it is something to be aware of especially considering how anti-sex work sentiment affects overly sexualised groups (trans women) and groups who engage in sex work more frequently (also trans women)

#word of god #also like kind of a dig #but this is actually very obvious and i feel the fact ppl arent noticing it shows again just how lacking most ppls knowledge of #the dangers of radfems is #its more than just terfs and transmiosginy people!#and even if you *only* care about trans women #its more than just terfs and transmisogoiny that affects trans women!#radical feminism is a plague upon us and ppl ignore it and fall for it too easily #but pat themsepves on the back amd think theyre safe cus they called out a terf engaging in teansmisoginy #thats not enough!

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anotherpapercut · 2 months

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I agree that drugs should be legalised and not stigmatized but you're delusional if you think "most drugs can be consumed completely safely with almost 0 risk to the user"

I think the key here is the word "can" by which I mean that if consumed in safe doses and safe environments and from safe sources etc most like mainstream drugs (I'm thinking of like mdma, LSD, shrooms, ketamine, coke) CAN be consumed safely with very little risks. I know this to be a fact #1. because I've done a lot of actual research on this where I've read numerous sources from scientists doctors and users as opposed to just say taking in the abstinence only information I received during school, reading a couple Tumblr posts and assuming I know everything there is to know about the topic and #2 I've used every drug I just listed and more and never suffered any adverse effects because I did my research, tested them for impurities when appropriate, and took other measures to ensure my safety

there are obviously exceptions and drugs that just shouldn't be fucked with (meth and heroin is what I'm thinking, but I also know people who have consumed these once or twice with 0 repercussions because that's how human experience works), but if you're actually interested in learning more about the many ways in which you were lied to about how "illegal drugs" are somehow automatically much worse for you than prescription drugs or socially acceptable drugs (like caffeine and alcohol) then feel free to either 1. do your own ACTUAL research that does not involve trusting for profit rehab centers and abstinence only educators (I'll even get you started with a couple good resources) or 2. message me off anon to have a real discussion about the mechanisms by which the most common drugs operate and the ways in which they can be consumed as safely as you can consume alcohol cigarettes and energy drinks but sending me your half cocked uninformed and unnecessarily insulting opinion on anon is not exactly productive. additionally, I'm sure you can see why I struggle to see or believe that you ACTUALLY think drugs should be destigmatized and aren't just parroting what you think the correct woke opinion is when you refuse to even take the very first step to destigmatizing drugs, drug use, and drug users and actually unlearn all the stigmatizing things you've been taught

I know that it's a lot easier just to port over all the things you've learned from dubious sources that you trusted implicitly because they claimed to be an authority and not actually do the work required to achieve the goals you claim to support, but easier doesn't mean right

#thanks for trying though #messages like this are so interesting because what are you trying to accomplish here #oh fuck guys someone anonymously called me delusional for stating a fact which i can support with research #guess i better change my whole world view #i guess if im giving you the benefit of the doubt here ill say maybe i used the word 'most' a bit erroneously #considering there are like thousands of prescription and nonprescription drugs #but ironically people always talk about the danger of drugs without actually meaning to invlude prescription drugs #even when theyre talking about things like fentanyl. because prescription drugs are just thought of as safe #in a way that like lsd (which is extraordinarily safe) is not #but even still i feel that the rest of the point of my post shouldve overshadowed what might be somehwat of an exaggeration #youve just ignored the entire rest of the post in favor of supporting your preexisting worldview #so you can feel superior for some reason? like why else would you send this message #fascinating

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cinamun · 1 year

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New beginnings

#ts4 #indya #black simblr #meanwhile #in a penthouse in San Myshuno....#smh #no further comment #tw adult themes #bro we don't ignore safe words #fuck this guy #I know I said no comment #but he's bogus #ts4 story #sims 4 story #simblr #ch21

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idalievu · 26 days

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Started reading the jaws novel today. Why is it like that.

#it’s BAD but it’s INTRIGUING. I’m only just at chapter 5 so I’ve got a ways to go but like. there’s so much here that I think #has shifted context over the years since it was published. like the descriptions of the summer beach goers #is honestly written in a more horrifying light than the shark !! all these perfectly pristine trust fund teens #with so much money and so much time to do whatever they’d like #and they’re EDUCATED. so they may be aware of the world around them and the injustices the rest of the world faces #and they see it ALL and decide it’s below them.#(not just the teens obviously the teens just got the most physical description)#what once might have been a favorable and enviable description has now (for someone like me at least) turned into a horrifying description #that conveys an ugly greed and willful ignorance rather than a desirable cushy life #why don’t I write all this in the post where words belong instead of the tags? idk #it’s safe in here in my little blue bubbles #jaws #jaws 1975 #main tags cause why not #who’s that noshin on me leg

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trappedinafantasy37 · 6 days

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Damn, it really do only take one person to make you question your entire being and doubt everything you think and write. No idea how hard I'm resisting my inner Durge to burn my notebook and wipe my hard drive right now.

#real tempted to just going back to lurking #seems to be the only safe way to engage with content #im getting real tired of being told to shut up cause i dare disagree #or to keep having my words be twisted and ignored #sorry for the pity party. just having a bad day and the outlook isnt looking so good either.#i will do my best not to throw away all my work again like last time #starting over again from scratch was painful.

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arsenicflame · 8 months

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ran out of time to finish my full feelings write up before s2 but i wanted to put something out there before we start getting content so this might be a bit incomplete

ive been thinking about what i really want to see in s2, and in general im happy to trust the crew with whatever they do but there is one thing id like to see

id like to see izzy not forgive ed

ive already talked about how serious i find the act of severing his toe & surrounding details in general and i think, given we KNOW its going to get worse (at some point izzy loses his leg, so) i dont think the amputation can be brushed off as just a pinky.

what i want to see is their relationship worsen and worsen and get to a breaking point and just. when everything starts to goes back to how it was before, ed tries to treat izzy like he used to (not during the kraken era, but before that, before the revenge, back when they knew each other, when they were friends) and izzy doesn't take it. he flinches, or walks away, or does anything to brush ed off. ed hasn't apologised yet, of course, its izzy, its his izzy, they understand each other! or he thought they did but now hes realising that mayyyyybe he should give him a proper apology.

so he does. and:

"i dont forgive you"

and if course. ed doesn't know what to do with this izzy always forgives him, has since they were kids! why not now?

from izzys perspective, he simply cant take it any more. he will take the consequences of his actions, but he cant lie anymore and pretend he wasn't destroyed by what ed did. and maybe hes learning its not just ed and izzy against the world anymore. there are people who will stand beside him- they might not always like him, he might spit and hiss at calling them his friends, but he knows, deep down, he is not alone anymore. and that its time to take a stand. to put himself first for once.

he cant forgive him, not for this

its at this point ed realises that he might have fucked up. really fucked up. its not that he doesn't care about how the crew feels, hadnt already realised what he had done but. again, its izzy. there was a time he thought there was nothing he could do that izzy wouldn't forgive.

the way i see it this is the point that ed starts to properly rebuild. oh he thought he was doing it before but it was more masks and layers, but now he has to truly confront his actions and the consequences they have on his relationships and that maybe. he is like his dad. but at the same time, he has the space to learn that even if he is, thats not all he can be. he can be better, choose to do better, and it's hard and doesn't always work but he has to try, has to keep trying because if he fails? he has no one to fall back on any more

so izzy doesn't forgive ed.

and ed learns to forgive himself, in time. and maybe he will apologise again, and izzy still doesn't forgive him. and maybe ed learns to be ok with that. and maybe in the wreckage of decades of blackbeard and first mate hands, they can build something new. it won't be the same, and maybe there will always be a distance between them, but in time, with work, they can be friends again.

#id started on this thread before the e1 clip but that really solidified how i was feeling #caveat that there is obviously forgiveness both ways im not ignoring that im just speaking specifically about izzy to ed here #got fed up of trying to make this a proper post (see top note) so this is kinda just. run on. train of thought #get it out my head before it eats me #originally this was gonna be heavier on WHY i wanna see it but its a bit more narrative now idk #i don't control my brain #if this is a hot mess i am sorry i Did Not reread it once #and my handle on words is spotty at best on a good day #nyxtalks #ofmd #ofmd s2 spoilers #vaguely #izzy hands #israel hands #blackhands #edizzy #i need the izzy hands intervention squad to show him he has people who will back him on this 100%#hes not alone anymore hes safe and he doesn't need to take it #idk i just think. the loss of izzy would be the final straw for ed (izzy stays. thats the one truth. izzy stays) and it would destroy him #but maybe in a way he needs to be destroyed #idk what weve seen so far is very hot and cold and up and down and A Mess and jst. idk im pushing him over the edge #they consume me i want to lock them in a small room together i want to get them both 500m restraining orders #i did not include the 'Izzy leaves the boat' tangent on this but the door is open. to me. (sam. sam is there. To Me.)

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bunnihearted · 7 months

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hmm

#i just feel like i cant connect to anyone #i dont feel safe with anyone. ppl are so cold and callous #and in fact most ppl support and contribute to abuse & rape culture #and knowing that just makes me not feel safe or comfortable with them #thus i cant trust them w my experiences. i cant trust them at all tbh #+ i have a deeper connection w animals & nature and most ppl.. are so disconnected from those #i just dont feel.. ok with anyone #also the fact that i constantly have to mask. every interaction w ppl feels like a performance #everyone already has decided what they think others should be. and i dont fit into that. im none of it #so i feel sm like no one could understand me. and in turn i dont understand anyone either :/#it's making me feel so so so so fucking lonely #my world views and experiences and everything are things i just cannot ignore #i simply cant shut it off and be w ppl regardless #and i know i cant expect to meet ppl EXACTLY like me. but i just want some that are kinda similar #sigh all of this is so hard to even put into words. it feels like im not explaining this properly #i just look around me sometimes and feel so extremely alone bc i cant connect w anyone. i just dont understand ppl at all.#and i just wanna feel safe and comfortable #maybe what im saying is that someone world views and morals etc are important to me #i cant connect with someone who denies a genocide for example #bc that is so fundamentally against who i am and what i believe in #but it is so fkn rare i cant even come up w an example of me coming across someone similar to mtyself #idk.. just dont wanna be alone

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seiya-starsniper · 9 months

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#if I've made anyone uncomfortable with the things I've been posting the last few days that was in fact the point and fully intended #and I don't say that to be cruel but simply to drive home the point that fandom spaces can be both safe and hostile at the same time #it is a deeply uncomfortable thing to acknowledge and I know most people do no want to deal with that and I understand that truly #but it was important to me to acknowledge and to give my opinion so that's what I did #At the same time none of this changes my opinion on my ship or the fact that I love a certain character other people find problematic #and I am fine with people finding that problematic because I am human being I am problematic by default #and I am confident enough in myself as a person to know when to acknowledge when I've contributed to problematic behavior #and realize the world doesn't end when this happens #my opinion of the fandom I've made my home in hasn't changed either #I had these views before and now they're out there in the open messy wording and all #and if you've decided that changes your opinion of me for the worse that's fine you can unfollow block etc #I understand that even in my attempt to acknowledge hurt within my fandom I've probably hurt other people and I have made my peace with it #but for everyone else that's shown me support both on tumblr and in private #for everyone that's listened to me vent about this subject over DMs and validated my hurt feelings #instead of trying to press your own discomforts onto me to carry in addition to my own #thank you #I've carved a permanent space in my heart for you and I truly mean that #I waded into this mess fully expecting to be ignored at best and to lose connections at worst and I was fully okay with it #but the love I've gotten and the deep honest and vulnerable conversations I've had over the last few days has truly been astounding to me #this last part is taking me AGES to write #because I'm actually crying thinking about all the good that's come out of this #and I acknowledge that's not a universal opinion and that's fine I'm really only speaking to my personal experience with what's happened #which despite outward appearances has been incredibly cathartic and uplifting for me #and I don't need everyone in the fandom to share my views or validate me or tell me I'm right people are allowed to disagree #I also don't need to have a deep personal and honest connection with everyone in the fandom where I can share my deepest vulnerabilities #but the fact that I could have that connection with some of you? that's enough for me. it's everything to me.

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dancingisdangerouss · 2 years

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Heyoo, hope you're doing well!

This is a dexter morgan x fem!reader request!

Consider this, established relationship, hot smut.

That's it.

(I am starved for dexter morgan fics)

So I definitely think Dexter would 100% be into bloodplay, and hope you don't mind that I went in that direction! With his obsession with it and keeping blood trophies from his victims, it just makes sense to me.

Summary: Reader does not know her boyfriend is a serial killer, but she does discover that he has a thing for blood, and suggests they bring it into the bedroom...

Warnings: Blood/bloodplay, slight ignoring of safe words, dark content, sexual content. Dexter is a serial killer and has been known to be unfeeling for the most part, and unable to control himself at times. Read at your own discretion.

“Fuck!”

You winced and dropped the paring knife, which clattered into the sink. Vinaceous blood rose to the surface, pooling in the palm of your hand. You set aside the potato on the cutting board, cursing yourself for such a clumsy slip.

“Y/N?” Dexter called from the living room. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, no worries, it’s just a small cut. I think,” you hollered back, turning the faucet to the cold setting.

Just as you eased the handle up to start the water, Dexter materialized at your side, catching your hand in his.

“Oh! Hi, babe. You scared me,” you laughed as he drew your hand closer to himself, scrutinizing the wound.

As your eyes lifted to his, a shiver spiraled down your spine. An eerie shadow had crept over his eyes, an almost hungry glint present there as he lightly squeezed your hand, watching the fresh beads of blood dribble out. You cringed.

“Dexter?”

The blood spatter analyst drew your hand up to his mouth. His tongue flicked out to lap against the slice, slowly collecting the blood as it darted across the open wound. His warm saliva stung your skin.

“Dexter! What the fuck—?”

Dexter withdrew and met your gaze, startled, as though he were just now really looking at you. That corybantic shade lifted from his eyes.

“Shit! Sorry, Y/N, let me—” He hastily turned on the faucet, thrusting your hand beneath the cool stream. His broad shoulders shook with a nervous laugh. “I was just messin’ with you. You should’ve seen your face, it was adorable.”

You weren’t buying it. Grinning knowingly, you shut off the faucet, your hands running up and over his chest to link around his neck. “Well damn, Dex. I knew you were into blood in the streets, but I didn’t realize you liked it in the sheets.”

The poorly-hidden panic in Dexter’s face quelled. “Sorry?”

“There’s no shame in a blood kink, babe,” you reassured him with a wink. “You should’ve just told me! We need to be honest with each other if you want this relationship to work.”

“Oh…” Dexter’s lip quirked, relief tinging his expression. It was so cute, how he seemed to think he could hide things from you. To everyone else, Dexter was an unknown—a strange, unreadable man with blank pages inside. But you’d known him long enough to pick up on his emotions. There was nothing he could hide from you.

“Sooo…” You released him, fishing a clean paring knife out of the wooden knives block. “What say you? Wanna put dinner off a bit? Maybe…” you stroked the blunt end of the knife along Dexter’s collarbone and he stiffened, “we can explore this a little more?”

Dexter’s breaths quickened. “You’d…want to do that?”

“I can’t say yet whether I’m into it or not, but…” You kissed the tip of his nose. “For you? Anything.”

Dexter’s lips crashed into yours so hard, you nearly fell backward. He slid the knife from your hand and tucked it in his back pocket, beginning to lead you carefully toward the bedroom, all the while moving his mouth feverishly with yours.

You’d never seen him so excited before. Sure, he seemed to enjoy your sex life plenty, but you had yet to see this…animalistic side of your lover. You liked it.

Dexter kissed you all the way to the bed, only momentarily parting from you to root around in his closet for something. A shuffle of clothing and boxes later, he withdrew with a large plastic sheet in his arms.

“Well isn’t that convenient?” you teased as he spread the tarp out across the bed. “You’ve been wanting to do this for a while, haven’t you?”

Dexter chuckled, lifting you effortlessly onto the mattress as if you were made of nothing more than styrofoam. “Why else would I have giant sheets of plastic in my closet?”

Crawling atop you, he made quick work of his own shirt and belt, unzipping his pants but not yet removing them.

“You got a safe word in mind?” he asked as he retrieved the knife from his jeans.

You stared at the ceiling fan thoughtfully. “Fava beans.”

Dexter wrinkled his nose at that. “Is that a Silence of the Lambs reference?”

“Yup.”

“Isn’t that a little…morbid for this?”

You giggled, pulling him to you for another kiss. “Not when you’ve got a morbid boyfriend.”

Dexter smirked. “Fava beans it is. Quick question: How attached to that dress are you?”

“Huh?” You looked down at your handsome green sundress, which you had picked up years ago at a second-hand shop. You liked it, but it wasn’t anything special to you. “Not…not a whole lot. Why?”

With a feral grin, Dexter nudged the sharp side of the blade between your breasts, cutting a slow split down the fabric from cleavage to navel. His large hands slipped beneath the dress, ripping the last parts of the seam open to the bottom, fully exposing your undergarments.

“Ahh, okay, I can dig it,” you purred, wiggling as he began to peel your panties off.

He had the decency to at least remove your bra and panties by hand, tossing them haphazardly over his shoulder before bringing the knife back into play. He very carefully and meticulously drew the blade along your exposed throat, tickling the skin teasingly. Dragging it down your neck, he chose a spot at your collarbone, easing the knife into your flesh just enough to let a thin line of crimson follow in its tracks.

You shivered, wincing. The knife froze in place.

“Fava beans?”

You shook your head. “Trust me, Dex. I’ll tell you if it’s too much.”

That was all the encouragement he needed. He ran an index finger gently along the new break in your skin, smearing the blood like red fingerpaint in little circles. You had a grotesque fascination with the look on his face as he did so, his wild eyes burning like hot coals as he leaned in to dab his tongue along the streaks.

You groaned against him and his hips bucked lightly into yours, that telltale hardness scraping at your core. The knife made its way down to your belly, nipping deeper into the skin than before as he allowed more blood to bubble up to the surface. He sighed contentedly at it.

Dexter’s fingers tucked into his jeans, yanking them down the rest of the way. He kicked them off, his boxers following suit before he re-planted himself over you, pumping his length while he sucked and licked across your bloodied stomach, groaning lustfully at the taste.

He flipped you onto your back, pulling your hips up to his as he ground against your ass, the firm head of his cock nudging at your entrance. You whined, wiggling encouragingly as he circled his hard erection around your weeping slit.

“Please,” you begged, digging your fingers into the bedsheets.

His cock breached your welcoming walls, fully plunging into you in one hard, quick thrust. You both moaned in unison at the intrusion, and his teeth raked across your shoulder.

Dexter began a slow rhythm, thrusting fully in and out each time in long strokes. All the while he continued to indulge himself with the knife, leaving thin little trails of blood artfully along your back and between your shoulder blades. How he managed to steadily cut you with such precision while simultaneously fucking you from behind, you’d never know.

Between cuts, he occasionally squeezed handfuls of your flesh between his fingers, forcing more blood to rise up and trickle down from the cuts. He licked all over the punctures as he continued to strike his hips against yours, teeth even nipping at the edges of the open wounds.

Heavy panting escalated alongside harder thrusts, and he groaned throatily as he dug the knife into a spot near your upper back, piercing deeper than before.

“Dex…” Your eyes fluttered open, the pain beginning to overwhelm the pleasure. “That’s a bit much, babe.”

But Dexter continued to thrust with reckless abandon, grunting and panting as he forced the knife deeper in time with his thrusting, his eyes rolling back. You couldn’t see his face, but you almost felt the shift in the air, the change in his movements as he pummeled you.

“Ah! Fava beans,” you whimpered, unable to handle it anymore.

Dexter said nothing verbal, still moaning deeply as he rammed into you, the knife now feeling like it was tearing through cartilage. It was almost like he had tapped into some other place inside of himself, and couldn’t even hear your cries.

“Fuck! Dexter! Fava beans, fava beans!”

As if breaking out of a hypnotic state, Dexter suddenly ripped the knife from your shoulder. Blood and cum gushed forth from flesh and cock as Dexter came hard, yelling out your name as he held himself still, hips rocking throughout his powerful orgasm.

The knife clattered to the ground and you fell forward as he released you, gasping for breath. Having snapped out of his reverie, Dexter pulled his soft cock from between your nether lips and scrambled off the bed, rushing to your side.

“Y/N! Shit, I didn’t mean to—” He frantically grabbed his shirt off the floor, pressing it to the gaping wound on your back. “Shit. Are you all right? Don’t worry, I can stop the bleeding, it’s not deep enough for stitches or anything. I’m so sorry. I didn’t even realize…”

“Clearly we need a new safeword,” you grumbled, sitting up on your hands and knees as he held the t-shirt firmly in place. “I mean, fuck, Dex, it’s almost like you’ve stabbed someone before.”

You never noticed the guilt-ridden look on his face.

#asks #requests #anonymous #slowly getting to all of these #I know I'm taking forever #dexter #dexter x reader #dexter morgan #dexter morgan x reader #dexter morgan x female reader #tw blood #tw bloodplay #tw dark #tw dubious consent #at least regarding the blood and inadvertently ignoring the safe word

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