#its NOT happening and you know it. convince me otherwise i dare you. you wont.

[neonbuck]

got cut off my health insurance with no warning but i dont have the energy to ask for help anymore. im just gonna deal and try to draw faster and better so i can afford to get back on it/pay premiums

#.txt #too many people need help most of my friends are also suffering #people are dying people are starving and everyone who has the power to stop it doesnt care or enjoys killing people #theres zero fucking hope in this damn earth and im just alive to pathetically attempt to care for my loved ones #and anyone else i can possibly help in any way #its so over lol its so BEYOND fucking over #just look at the last thing i reblogged #can you look me in the eye and tell me with a straight face that things wont just keep spiraling into hell #can you look me in the eye and tell me you truly believe that 'voting' does anything or that there will be a 'revolution' #its NOT happening and you know it. convince me otherwise i dare you. you wont. #everyone is either too tired or too selfish and cowardly #and its too fucking late. the cruelty and pain and injustice has torn a mortal wound in the earth itself #its OVER. and everyone with a heart is slowly bleeding out.

[om-headcanon]

☆ mc catching the obey me brothers crying

i believe its fair to assume mc has seen at least one of the boys cry. here is what i believe happened. (if you want me to do undateables, let me know! tw for low self worth, panic attacks, and survivors guilt/death mentions)

lucifer

without a doubt the most embarassed to be caught crying

he had just gotten into an argument with diavolo, and he questions his importance in diavolos life

he goes into the study to get some extra work done late at night to reassure himself he is useful

with all of the stress from the situation at hand and some stress from supporting the family on his back, he cant help but shed a few tears

all he wants to do is keep those around him happy and healthy... and it tears him apart when he cant

if i cant make the ones i love happy then... what can i do...

he doesnt notice your presence, as he has hands over his eyes and is breathing slowly in order to relax himself

you call out his name softly to get his attention

lucy jumps and tries wiping his eyes and playing it off as if he was never crying

you walk closer to him and he keeps inquiring if theres anything you need

you dont say anything, you just place your arms around him and hold him in a tight embrace

and he starts crying again on your shoulder... harder, this time. holding you tighter and closer in the embrace

because of his pride, its hard for him to admit what he needs the most: someone to show they care for him

mammon

mammon is the type to not cry often but when he does, its a lot

while his brothers dont really have bad intentions, the daily degradation they execute against mammon really gets to him

he can only put up his confident front for so long, and not long after a fight with asmo, it recedes

he lay on his bed sobbing heavily into a pillow to muffle the sound for nearly a full hour

his mind cant help but insist all the words his siblings tell him are true... and he wishes more than anything that you were there to tell him they werent

he looks up to the door every once in a while with blurry vision, mind convincing him theyre at the door, but you not being there makes him cry even harder

maybe they just think the same as the rest of my brothers

he hears the doorknob, but convinces himself its his mind again. ironically enough, this makes him cry even harder

except its actually you this time

you run over to his bed to sit down next to him and rub his back reassuringly, asking if hes alright

he jolts up, shocked youre actually here. he closes his mind and smiles sadly with a tear stained face

he pulls you into an embrace and whispers a soft thank you... your presence helps him more than you will ever know

you hold him for a few minutes and tell him how awesome the Great Mammon really is

leviathan

its been a long stressful day at rad, and he cant help but overthink every single action he has made

every single glance hes made, every single word hes said ... just everything

most days he would resort to playing a game or watching an anime he loves in attempt to distract himself, but other days its not that easy

he starts spiraling, thinking of not only everything hes done that day, but actions hes done in the past too

eventually hes past the point of no return, and starts having a panic attack

levi cant seem to catch his breath and with the thoughts still rushing through his head at full speed, he cant attempt to calm himself down

he envies those who dont feel the way he does right now because god, what he would do to not feel like this

you were just wondering why your gaming buddy hasnt come looking for you so naturally, you go to him

you knock on his door waiting for him to ask you for the entry code... but theres no response

you enter and are quite shocked to see levi shaking on his bed

this is familiar to you... whether youve had to guide a friend through a panic attack or have been through one yourself, you know what to do

you reassure him this will all pass and knowing how hard school is for him, you tell him he did well today

you get him to regulate his breathing and gain some composure

hes embarassed you had to see him like that... but he lets you know hes so thankful that you came to help him

satan

he just wants to be his own person but with how his life was set for him, its almost as if thats a tall order

its very rare he cries from happiness or anything like that, but sometimes he gets so sad that he gets angry... and then he cries a lot

no one dares to go near him like that

and that hurts him too... that nobody could or would ever dare to console him because they fear what hed do to them

he acknowledges this is a justified fear as he is after all the representation of wrath itself, but it still hurts nonetheless

belphie decided to poke fun and tease satan reminding him of how hes lucifers shadow

he didnt take it well... and retreated to his room to handle his emotions

he knew his family didnt want anything to do with him while he was angry... and that made him feel like a burden

but he grew used to everyone expecting he handle his emotions himself even if every once in a while he desired some reassurance

satan sat in a corner of his room crying to himself waiting for this to pass because he didnt believe anyone else would care to check on him

but you were curious as to why he wasnt in his usual 4 pm reading spot, so you decided to check his room

he was just sat completely still staring into the distance while tears fell down his face

he didnt even notice your presence until you sat down next to him

you didnt want to pry, so you just asked if he wanted to talk about it

he shook his head, laid on your shoulder, and just said “this is all i need”

asmodeus

ahh... while self love is so easy for him, self value isnt

its easy for him to believe people want to be around him solely with lustful intent rather than because they genuinely love him

he doesnt really believe anyone could ever love him

so he overcompensates through self love because he believes hes the only person who could ever love him

hes great at hiding it but sometimes, this gets to him... especially after some quick encounters with others at the fall

he thinks maybe there is no depth to him.. maybe i really am just a pretty face and nothing else

asmo cries pretty often, but he only lets people see him cry when its over something material (ie, he couldnt get a new bag hes been wanting for weeks)

he cries quietly too in effort to make sure nobody sees him

he seemed to have forgetten that you two were planning to go shopping today so you went to his room to see if he was ready

you werent expecting to see him rolled over in bed softly crying to himself

you startled him when you said his name

“oh, mc, i didnt see you there!” he chuckles lightly to himself in effort to change the mood of the atmosphere as he wipes his eyes

you ask if hes okay and his sad smile falls slightly

he asks you if you genuinely think he could ever be lovable

your heart breaks a little knowing that he even has a moment of self doubt, but you reassure him that hes a lovable person inside and out

you hug him tightly while another tear falls down his face

you two decide shopping is best for another day... for now, you just want to talk and do facials

beelzebub

beel loves his family a lot

more than he loves food (also a lot)

he hates conflict between them and would do absolutely anything to avoid it

what he hates the most about himself is how hungry he gets... hes aware its poorly timed but theres really nothing he can do about it

but the feeling hes being an inconvenience to those he loves hurts him

beel is great at smiling as often as possible, but if theres any tension between the family, he wont stop crying until its resolved

once he was so hungry it wasnt possible to control himself and he ended up going on a rampage

he earned scolds from lucifer, mammon, and satan for this

it tore him apart knowing that he had caused his family trouble for even a second and he started crying because of the guilt

he couldnt even find enough energy to make it back to his room, so he just sat in the kitchen with tears on his face

you had decided to go to the kitchen to get a snack when you saw him

he apologized for being in the kitchen and offered to move if you wanted his seat, but you declined

beel didnt even bother wiping the tears from his eyes... he wore them like they were a punishment for his own behavior

when you asked him what was wrong, all he said was that he was a bad brother

you tried to tell him otherwise, but then he went into detail about the situation and how all he does is cause the family distress

you told him that isnt true at all and he continues to bring light and happiness to all those around him

hearing that his brothers will come around and know he meant no harm is all he needed to hear

“thank you, mc... i feel less hungry when im with you”

belphie

he has lots of survivors guilt

its been millenia but he still wishes that it was him instead of lilith

because of this he cries quite often, but never in front of anyone other than beel

this feeling that lilith and him should have traded places haunts him often, and its not always so easy to sleep it off

as fore mentioned, he usually finds comfort in talking to his older twin but beel isnt always there

beel was at one of his clubs at rad and belphie didnt want to bother him, but he really did need someone right now

unlike his older brothers, belphie actually makes an effort to find you

he doesnt find you in your room nor the kitchen, so he continues to search around the house in hopes youre around here somewhere

he happens to find you by yourself in the study on your d.d.d.

belphie feels bad bothering you, and enters the room quite quietly

“mc, can we talk?”

he sits down next to you and lays his head on your shoulder

contrary to what he stated he wanted, not much talking is being done

he just lies there quietly crying with no explanation why

he realises he may not be as ready to talk about it as he thought... but thats okay

you tell him that youre going to listen whenever hes ready to talk about it

that makes him feel a lot better

he falls asleep right there with a thankful smile placed on his face

#satans was lowk the hardest to write #i hope i wrote them all well tho >: #also some of these are .. quite long o_o #my apologies #obey me headcanon #obey me #belphie headcanon #beel headcanon #satan headcanon #mammon headcanon #lucifer headcanon #levi headcanon #asmo headcanon

[musubiki]

do u have any chilumi hc’s ?

aaa sort of!! but again i havent played his quest yet so some of these may in inaccurate and/or confirmed/unconfirmed!!

- they sparr at least once a week. this was childes proposition, and he looped her into it by promising lots of rewards (which she wasnt sold on at first), with paimon being like “no!! no trust!!” and then he threw in a free dinner afterwards and paimon was like “HHH LUMINE..JUST A FEW TIMES A WEEK...WOULDNT HURT...” so now its a regular thing. think of it like the golden house fight (except he doesnt use the foul legacy), and its somewhere in the mountains where they wont get in trouble with anyone

- and then they go to various restraunts afterwards (he is a man of his word)

- lumine never asks him for mora. even though hes offhandedly said “come to me for mora anytime~” she feels uncomfortable about it and/or thought he was being an ass again. instead she works vigorously on commissions for the guild

- (BASED ON THAT LAST PIECE) sometimes he cant make it to their little sparring “dates,” and she finds him at the northland bank suffering because he has to do paperwork, which he hates. he stares at the wall for 5 hours wishing he could go fight someone instead

- so she helps him with paperwork stuff. once it was after she did like 16 commissions that same day and just passed out.

- childe has a little suite in his office at the northland bank that he stays in. that time she passed out he let her rest in his room because god knows when was the last time she had an actual bed instead of just sleeping in abandoned treasure hoarder camps (you know the ones)

- he spoils her LMFAOOO!!! he always says “gotta make sure my sparring partner is in top shape, otherwise its boring!” which is the same excuse he convinces himself is the reason. deep down he kinda cares about her. 

- i just got the black sword in-game and it looks so much like a fatui weapon, so i like to think its a gift to lumine from childe after she complained once about her sword getting too old and damaged. 

- she looks at the lore, “hmm it says this sword makes the user thirst for violence...” childe just replies “i know right?!?! isnt that badass???” hes so happy. right up his ally

- (she uses it anyway)

- but she also gave him a bow she pulled from the gacha because she doesnt use bows and his heart skipped like 5 beats its such a nice bow (THAT ONE NICE BLACK AND RED BOW THAT MATCHES HIM SO WELL)

- lumine doesnt know that exchanging weapons used to be a courting gift. childe doesnt tell her. he uses the bow regularly

- they go walking in the city a lot

- they also play theatre mechanics against each other and its brutal

- sometimes on his day off he tags along in her adventures!! catch him running up to her at the city gate going “ahaha im free today, need an archer??” and shes like “ok”

- he gets jealous when she tells him she has OTHER people she sparrs with. he acknowledges its a dumb thing to be jealous about, and its a normal thing but...,..,,. hes lowkey seething in his office, filling out new recruit forms while his girlie sparrs with xiao. he’ll kill that dumb bitch

- i think scaramouche knows him and lumine are “friends.” he tried to hold it against childe once but then childe was like “oh yeah what about you and that water witch from mondstadt?” and now scaramouche shuts his stupid ass up. catch them being emo about their cute not-girlfriends 

- (I KEEP THINKING ABOUT THAT CUTE COMIC OF CHILDE WEARING LUMINES FLOWER AND SCARAMOUCHE IS LIKE “lmfaoo bro whats that on your head???!!!” and childe goes “...whats that on your head?” and its MONAS HAT)

- everytime lumine kicks someones ass and/or does/says something violent, childes reaction is either “thats hot” OR “when are you joining the fatui?”

- childe told the northland receptionist to give her vip access to the bank and if she ever asks for him let him know IMMEDIATELY. he also gave her full access to withdraw from his account whenever she wants (she found out via the receptionist. lumine dare not touch his savings)

- people at the northland bank who know are like “has....has he lost his mind?” and someone else goes “what, are YOU gonna confront childe, the 11th harbinger, about his mental health?” and the answer is no.

- hes very attracted to her. and she is to him too. lumine hides it better/doesnt act on it but catch her checking him out lowkey when hes not looking

- theres a 100% chance they made out at some point but im not sure what point or how it happened

[skycollides]

Hi bubba!❤️ I really hope you’re well and happy! I’m falling in love with your fics😍😍 your writing is honestly remarkable!! I wanted to request for ez if that’s okay? With “You love her don’t you?” “is it that obvious?” It can be an angsty or fluffy ending whatever you think fits best!! Thank you so much🥰❤️❤️

Hey sweetheart! Thank you for all the love and support from day one! I love and appreciate you❤️❤️

I really hope you enjoy this one 🥰😘

No risk no fun

Ez x Reader

Authors note: I apologize in advance for grammar mistakes

English isn’t my native language.

Let me know if you want to be added to the taglist.

Warning: swearing, a little heartache, happy end

Words: 1.981

Ez’s Pov:

Another night at the clubhouse. Another party takes place and Ez can’t take his eyes off you. From the moment you walked in he was practically hypnotized by your beauty which was pretty obvious to Angel.

’’Hey little brother!’’ no reaction from Ez.

’’Ey earth to Ezekiel’’ he says smacking his head. Ez’s hand finds its way to the spot Angel hit him rubbing it.

’’Ouch. What was that for Angel?’’

’’Since you weren’t reacting I had to do something to get your attention. It’s hard to catch nowadays when my sweet Y/n is in the same room. Oh and by the way it’s really starting to become obvious. Bishop noticed too. You love her don’t you baby brother?’’

’’Is it that obvious?’’ 

’’Well only me and Bishop noticed so it isn’t that bad but dude if you love her you gotta tell her. You know I have this thing going on with her best friend and she told me that there is this guy, co-worker of hers who’s trying to get her attention he already asked her for a date so you better step up your game before its too late.’’ Angel tells him.

’’Why the hell would I tell her and make things awkward when she’s already seeing this guy? I lost my chance it’s better that way. She deserves better than an outlaw biker who murdered a cop. If you excuse me now I need to get new beer.’’ with that being said Ez leaves Angel there standing by himself.

Angels Pov:

‘‘Hey Y/bf/n baby. Come here.’’ he says standing at the door of the clubhouse. She leaves you and Letty and heads outside with Angel.

’’What is it?’’

’’Listen I need you to be honest with me. Do you promise me to tell the truth I need to ask you something important?’’

’’Sure. Just tell me what’s up?’’

’’Does Y/n have feelings for my brother?’’

’’Angel I can’t’’

’’What do you mean you can’t? You fucking promised me. Please I beg you.’’

’’Fine. Yes , yes she does. Why?’’

’’Yes I knew it! That’s fucking awesome. Listen baby I need your help. Ez loves her. I’m surprised you didn’t notice him staring at her all the time. We need to make this happen. My baby brother deserves to be happy after everything he went through with Emily. You simply need to convince Y/n not to go to the date with that guy and leave the rest to me okay?’’

’’Okay Angel. I hope this is working out or otherwise she’ll have my head for spilling her business.’’

’’As if I would let that happen’’ he says and kisses her head happy with the new information he now has.

A week later

Your Pov:

’’C’mon Y/n your co-worker is boring as fuck! He won’t make you happy.’’

’’And Ez will?’’

’’You’ll never now if you don’t tell him. Cancel the goddam date and come to the clubhouse with me. No risk no fun. Do you want to send the rest of your life overthinking what could have been between the two of you? Seriously he’s such a sweet guy you’d be perfect for each other!

’’Okay you win.’’ you give in defeated knowing that you will not won this fight and she is right. You can’t win without taking a risk.

You reach your destination about an hour later. Y/bf/n has texted Angel letting him know you will be there soon so when you get there he is already waiting for you outside.

’’Hey baby’’ he greets your bf before giving you a hug.

’’Hey Angel’’ you say.

’’Is everyone here already?’’ your bf asks him and he nods.

’’Yeah the party is started a couple of hours ago. Some guys from other charters are here so are Vickys girls. Well not everyone Ez went to his trailer shortly before you arrived. So let's go inside girls.’’ he finishes his monolog

’’Actually’’ you start 

’’I gotta talk to Ez first you can go in.’’ you say and your cheeks heat up being happy it’s dark so they won’t notice.

’’Go on. We’ll be inside’’ your bf says and they walk to the porch waiting there for what’s to come. Which you don’t notice since you’ve turned your back towards them. You open the door without knocking and go in there.

’’Listen Ez I gotta-’’ you stop speaking at the sight in front of you Ez only in his boxers laying in his bad with one of Vickys girls barely covered.

’’Y/n I-’’ he starts but you interrupt him right away.

’’I’m so sorry I- I should have knocked. I’m sorry’’ you say with a shaky voice literally running out of the trailer slamming the door behind you, tears leaving your eyes.

The door opens again and Ez come out now at least waking jeans.

’’Y/n wait! He says but you’re already in your car driving off.

Ez pov:

He turns around and sees Angel and his girls standing there looking at him. 

’’Are we going to finish what we started or what?’’ he hears a voice behind him.

’’Leave!’’ he tells her and she does as she’s told.

’’Are you fucking serious?’’ he hears Angel yell while he walking towards him.

’’What?’’

’’What? That’s all that comes to your mind genius? Crazy that a guy who’s as dumb as you got into a university like Stanford. You’re a fucking idiot that’s what you are. I told my girl to talk Y/n out of that fucking date with that guy so you have a shot. She convinced her to tell you about her feelings and you’ve got nothing better to do than getting your dick wet? I seriously thought you love Y/n but I guess I was wrong. My fault that beautiful and smart girl git her heart broken.’’

’’I do love her man! I had no idea’’ he says realizing he probably made the biggest mistake of his life.

’’Then do something about it brother! FIGHT FOR HER as I fucking told you before!’’

’’Ez that’s the key to her apartment. Please don’t fuck this up I want to see my best friend happy’’

’’Thanks guys’’ with that we walks to his bike and drives off.

Your Pov:

As soon as you get home you drop your heals in the hallway going straight into your bedroom jumping into bed and crying into your pillow. You can’t remember the last time you were hurt like this. You really thought you had a shot with him but it looks like your were wrong. And so was your best friend. With your thoughts running wild and all the crying you don’t notice someone coming into to the room. You only notice when the mattress moves.

’’I told you y/bf/n I fucking told you look where it got me!’’ you say with your voice cracking. You turn around and can’t believe your eyes. It’s not here sitting on your bed. It’s Ez with the most apologetic look on his face.

’’Get the fuck out of here. NOW!’’

’’I wont leave until you listened to me Y/n. Look I’m sorry you had to see this. God I don’t even know where to start. I better start with the fact that I’m completely in love with you. Head over heals. I know it doesn’t really look like it right now but listen. Last week Angel caught me staring at you again. And he asked if I was in love with you. He told me about your date with your co-worker and I knew I will never save a chance with you. I mean who am I? A outlaw biker who got out of jail couple months ago

because he murdered a cop. I mean come on Y/n. That guy has a stable job and is not in conflict with the law. I though you were better off with someone like him. I knew I lost so I tried to get over you with one of Vicky girls. I swear nothing happened. I know it looks bad but I couldn’t. You were on my mind the whole time sweetheart. I stopped her right before you walked in. I swear. I know that probably wasn’t the brightest idea to be honest. 

What I’m trying to say Y/n. I love you. I love you so fucking much baby. You had me hypnotized the moment I laid my eyes on you for the first time. I was blown away by your smile and your beauty. And girl don’t get me started on those beautiful eyes. But that’ not the reason I fell in love with you. That’s a lie it is a part but the main reason is your character. You are the sweetest girl with the biggest heart I’ve ever met. You light up my world babygirl. Please let me make it up to you. Give me a chance to prove that to you.’’ he ends his little speech staring down at the mattress nit daring to look you in the eyes.

’’Ez?’’ you say softly. No reaction.

’’Ez, sweetie look at me’’ and he looks up to you.

’’First of all you are literally the biggest idiot I’ve met. Seeing you with her fucking hurt me. I don’t think I’ve ever felt hurt like this before. I’m glad you didn’t sleep with her by the way. Listen Ez I love you. I don’t care that you went to jail. I love you for who YOU are. You are so much more than an outlaw biker Ezekiel. You are such a wonderful human being. I chose to become your friend for a reason. I love being around you. I love that I can have deep conversations with you. I love that you listen to me not matter what time it is. I love your kind heart, your humor and your smile. I swear you got me with that smile. I’m glad you’re here right now. Thanks for stopping by and telling m the truth. I love you too Ezekiel Reyes.’’ you say with a smile and before you can say anything else he grabs you by your neck pulling your face to bis before pressing his lips onto yours. Your hand fins its way to his cheek caressing it with your thumb while EzS tongs asks for entrance keeping the kiss as soon as you allow him. You’re the first one to release his lips to get some air. He leans his forehead against yours smiling at you.

’’Wow’’ you say.

’’Wow indeed. I cant believe I missed out on those soft lips for so long. Be my girl mi amor?’’

’’I thought you’ll never ask’’ you say laughing.

’’Yes I’ll be yours babe.’’ you say and kiss him again.

’’You’re going to stay here right?’’ you ask him hoping the answer will be yes.

’’Yes just let me call Angel real quick then I’ll join you in bed sweetheart.’’ with that being said he gets up from the bed gets undressed and calls Angel while you head to the bathroom getting ready for bed. When you leave the bathroom he’s laying in your bed still on the phone with Angel.

’’Ill see you tomorrow Angel. Bye!’’ Ez ends the call and puts his phone on the nightstand while you get into bed. 

’’Everything okay?’’

’’More than okay baby. Y/bf/n won’t kill me I guess that’s a good sign if you ask me’’ he says and you laugh.

’’Yes she can get quite protective to be honest.’’ you say cuddling into his chest. He wraps his arms around you pulling you closer before kissing your head.

’’I love you Y/n’’

’’I love you too Ezekiel. Sleep well my love’’

’’You too mi amor’’

Taglist:

@everyhowlmarksthedead

@mayans-sauce

@justatiredfool

@lovebennycolon

@queenbeered

@nadinesabre

@ocetevasgirl

@spookys-girl

@angelreyesgirl

#mayans mc #mayans imagine #ez reyes x reader #ez reyes #jd pardo

[baalzebufo]

🔫😃 give us them monster au Majima deets I dare you /hj

I'm invested, I wanna know stuff, like; What was the interaction between Kiryu and Majima like after the reveal? How did Haruka find out? Was it because she lives with Kiryu or did Majima tey to keep her oblivious to it as long as he can because no.?

I WANT THE DEETS AND I WANT EM NOW

(ya don't need ta do nothin if ya don't wanna, take yer time, I just wanna show excitement with this :>)

THANK YOU for the interest I am constantly excited to talk about things and will 100% share what deets I have

(Update: this got... WAY longer than I anticipated. So im putting it behind a readmore. sorry for the wall of text I got very passionate suddenly!!)

disclaimer: I have very little solid 'canon' established and 99% of this will be stuff I make up on the spot cause thats just how I do these things

So, in my head this all takes place after the events of the first game- Kiryu's been to jail, gets out, 10 billion yen drama ect. I think it would be peak drama if Majima accidentally let slip during the fight at Shangri-la that he isn't human, he got so hyped up on the idea of a 'fight to the death' with Kiryu (which, lets be honest, was probably a bit of suicidal ideation on his part because he wanted Kiryu to utterly destroy him) that he couldn't control himself and Kiryu gets an eyeful of claws and teeth and horns. But because things are so fucking manic during that point in the game, Kiryu deadass writes it off as a weird hallucination/'this might as well be happening' because he has WAY too much going on.

it's only after the games finished and Kiryu settles down, decides hes going to adopt Haruka and is trying to get his affairs in order when he's like. Holy Shit What Was Up With That.

Majima hasn't shown his face around him since because he becomes convinced Kiryu seeing that means hes going to despise him and/or try to kill him so he crawls into his hole to mope about it and Kiryu has to genuinely jump through hoops trying to find where he is. He was concerned! Eventually he gets in touch with Nishida who is equally worried about his boss (he knows Majima's secret but is sworn not to tell anyone) so he just. quietly tells Kiryu where Majima is living right now and prays it wont come back to bite him in the ass

He goes, Majima initially attempts to be like 'haha you hit your head pretty hard down there-' and write it off like that but Kiryu is nothing if not persistent and eventually he has a little meltdown about it and finally just shows him. Majimas been in a super weird mental state since Shimano died and hes just like, at his breaking point, so he figures 'fuck it, if Kiryu hates me, whatever' at that point

OBVIOUSLY Kiryu doesnt, hes just like. dude are you okay

they have a long ass talk about it and what happened and it all sort of culminates in an awkward love confession because turns out wow you two REALLY care about each other, huh!

Majima also shares that hes only really still in the yakuza because he feels like its the only place he belongs, that a monster like him doesn't deserve anything resembling a normal life. its that conversation that starts him on the path to realizing he's not happy there tbh

Im SEVERELY rambling at this point but. after a lot of emotional catharsis between these two they promise to try to make something work. majima considers leaving the yakuza, and kiryus going to make a home with haruka. and while hes not ready to join them properly, just yet, he's... thinking about it. in the meantime, he's heard some cool stuff about construction as a business, and he's lookin' into it.

they kept it from Haruka for a while, mostly because Majima is super not comfortable showing people. He didnt spend a lot of time around her because he still felt guilty about the kidnapping thing, but eventually Kiryu pushes him to try to apologize properly and make amends. Haruka is obviously suspicious of him but, I think shes got a good judge of character when it comes to if someones being earnest, and its clear Majima wasn't acting of his own volition. (She blackmails him for lots of ice cream as an apology.)

Eventually she picks up on the fact they're hiding *something* because of how like, furtive Majima becomes when he stays with Kiryu and how he's almost never actually around, especially since he loves being the center of attention otherwise. So they brace themselves for it all to come crashing down when they tell her.

It honestly... goes fine. Maybe its just cause she's a kid and was way more willing to believe monsters exist, but it's not quite the 100% world-shaking revelation. It does set them back a bit and there's a lot of convincing that 'not all monsters are evil', but eventually she settles on. 'he's not scary. he's just kind of weird.' and you know what? majima will 100% take that.

(also she thinks its funny how he purrs when you touch his ears a certain way. he's like a big weird puppy.)

okay goddamn this post got long enough as is but. thank you again for the interest I have... so many words in my brain about this. Ideally id love to write a proper fic but im really not great at structured writing like that- it takes a helluva lot of a work compared to just infodumping into a big nightmare post like this. One Day.

I mad appreciate any and all interest though! Like, at its heart this is a hurt/comfort kinda au, and my end-goal is for Majima to realize being a monster doesn't mean he doesn't get to be happy or that he doesn't deserve to be treated like a human. it is vitally important to me that these two old sad men be happy together and build a better life lmao

#I hope its ok to put this in the main tag im. just i like talking about this aaahh #goro majima #kazuma kiryu #monster au #im also gonna tag all this content as #longjima #because thats my silly nickname for his monster form #this is probably very disjointed and weird to read i am just!! my syndromes are activating you know

[gaetoeinhaler]

PERIOD DRAMA || NOCTU HC

masterlist

rules

includes ; female reader, nine, kirr, aitachi, day

       

scenario ;

    putting two and two together, you could make out what was happening. what you thought you had escaped from in your life as a human, has followed you over into your after life.

        soon, there's a knock at your door. trying to at least change into a new set of underwear and pants, the door opens and reveals the person from the other side.

______________

Aitachi :

• surprisingly, he knows what it is.

• will tell you how in his tribe, when a girl started her period, the tribe celebrates because then she could reproduce.

• "Aitachi, that's great and all, but i dont need a celebration for this....."

• does a mini celebration. just for tradition. but its only the two of you.

• follows you like a little duckling to the human world, asking questions as to why you needed tampons/pads and what they were.

• "what do you mean it helps with the blood?" "in my tribe, our girls walked around without those.... things." "they're call pads/tampons, aitachi, and its okay to say them." "weird pillow plush things"

• still wants to pull a whole celebration

• "So, who are you going to breed with?" "what?" "after girls in my tribe start their period, they get devoted to one of our men in the tribe and have kids!" "i don't think it's necessary for me to uh... reproduce."

• still questions the pillow plush things. he opened one of them up and eyed it suspiciously before running to you to ask more about it.

_______________

Kirr :

• things you got fucking assassinated.

• "who was it?" "Kirr, calm down please-" "was it the reapers from the 14th department?" "put your bear traps away-"

• have to explain to this man and he'll remember like the old man he is

• i headcannon he's from the flat out 1400-1500s and you cant tell me otherwise

• another little duckling

• questions pads/tampons but never out loud. keeps those questions inside his mind, and doesnt dare say them out loud

• probably wants to see how the blood works, legs spread open as he watches the blood, but he wont admit that

• like Aitachi, still confused about the pads/tampons but doesnt question it that much, though it still haunts him about the fact that you place them on your underwear/stick it up there

• not big with affection but if you need it, he'll be willing to comply

_______________

Nine :

• notices immediately

• has learned about it, school and after school

• knows a few things that'll help with your pain

• he'll make you his cookies, knowing of the craving for sweets during it

• he'll comfort you during your cramps

• he'll ask and borrow some medication from verine, with the bribe/lie of returning it. the man keeps ahold of it.

• pretty calm about it, not much to worry about since it's practically human and normal

• knows how to get certain things from places we shouldnt question

______________

Day :

• someone please explain what a period is to this man child.

• will automatically think you're going to die, even though you're already dead.

• extremely worried, even after you tell him what's happening.

• "day, please. it's okay, i'm no-" "WE NEED TO GET YOU TO THE HOSPITAL, BOSS! YOURE GOING TO DIE!"

• will try to carry and/or drag you to a hospital, but doesn't make it far after you told him to stop and put you down.

• as worried as he is, he will still listen. after trying to get his brain to process that you are not full on dying, and just suffering through shark week, he will sort of understand. not fully, but he's trying. :(

• is by your side 24/7, making sure you feel okay. when you say you need to go to the human world to get tampons/pads, he automatically wants to be the first person to go with you.

• may or may not build a tower out of the tampon/pad boxes as he waits for you to finish shopping.

• if you're craving for any sort of sweets, he will be more then happy to follow you to a stop, cafe, etc... to get it. and may convince you to get him something along the way.

• is extremely supportive during the whole time. got cramps? he'll carry you to your room or wherever you're trying to get to.

#after l!fe #afterl!fe #afterl!fe the sacred kaleidoscope #after l!fe the sacred kaleidoscope #afterl!fe aitachi #afterl!fe kirr #afterl!fe day #afterl!fe nine #after l!fe aitachi #after l!fe kirr #after l!fe day #after l!fe nine #afterl!fe x reader #after l!fe x reader #x reader #x female reader #reader insert #female reader insert

[edge-lorde]

hp update: its ur favorite tumblr user back at it again with another great post. thats right, as promised here is a more in depth look at the recent dragon themed time sensitive event!

this event takes place in year 6. bill is graduated but has been coming back to the school periodically to teach us bootleg DADA just like harry did in the books. it is on one such occasion that bill lets it slip that his next job from gringotts involves him going to the dragon reserve that we know charlie will eventually work at. bill had not told charlie about this job prior to this discussion precisely because of what happens next, which is that charlie wants to go.

this brings me back to year 4 days with the first charlie focused sidequest, where we scrounged up money to by what may or may not have been a dragon egg (it was not) from a strange man who had been seen trying to approach other unaccompanied minors walking around hogsmeade. this pure of dragon centric heart, but dumb of dragon centric ass quality was what made me start liking charlies character in the game in the first place. he begins negging his older brother in a way that is very familiar to me as a younger sibling. i as the mc of course jump on the bandwagon with charlie immediately. 

bill sounds very defeated in this part because he knows the negging wont end, and/or knows that he will eventually cave to charlies demands. “no you cant come.” he says with a sigh.

but well see about that, because charlie and i go ambush bill at work to ask again. 

as stated previously bill works at gringotts bank, which is run by goblins. i already had access to the location diagon alley, but before this event gringotts itself was closed to me. newly unlocked, charlie and i walk inside. unlike the hogwarts kitchens, it does not feel like walking into hell for me to do this. unlike house elves which only have 1 basic model used for every elf except for the 1 named elf, there is some variety in the goblin designs. there appears to be one basic goblin face that i can tell, but its paired with several different outfits and hairstyles, giving them the illusion of originality typically spent on unnamed background characters. there are also 3 named goblin characters with all their own stuff.  

the first is obviously griphook, the only real goblin character from the books. hes bills supervisor. in the books hes a pretty unlikable guy but here, though hes not nice exactly, he seems at least kind of chill. he doesnt kick charlie or me out for barging in and says its ok for us go on the mission with bill. its nice to see him unstressed. 

the other 2 goblins are the perhaps, hopefully, cool ones. one is younger than the rest and has some friendly dialog with you and his other named goblin friend, who possibly exists so the first one has someone to banter with. they dont do anything else this event but gringotts stays open after the event is completed so hopefully they will come back again and get their own plotlines. 

anyway, charlie and i harass bill at work for a bit. his boss comes in, hears our plea, and doesnt immediately tell us to leave.  instead he tells us the rundown of bills mission: a long time ago a goblin boasted that he could craft a golden dragon egg that would be indistinguishable from the real thing. he did, and it was. so much so that a dragon destroyed his house and stole it, i think he died in the process. 

“so,” says griphook, “that is why we must send you, 18 year old we just hired, to go to a remote location filled with dragons by yourself to rifle through their nests and bring back what is rightfully ours. no we dont know which dragon took the egg or even the type. yes you can bring your little brother and his friends.” 

sounds legit. charlie and i convince bill to not only let us come with him, but also our other classmates from his DADA class due to scheduling mishaps. we go gather the rest of the class to tell them about this but only merula, penny, and barnaby show up and so only they get to go on the field trip, which is convenient because otherwise wed have half the school out there and that would be entirely too many characters for the devs to write at once. 

we borrow the same tent the canon characters will eventually use in all their camping shenanigans in the book from hagrid and get to the dragon reserve via portkey. the reserve now appears on the stairs screen as a permanent new location, not a fleeting one as i once thought. theres dragons flying all around, majestic as hell. 

its too late in the day to start searching so we set up camp and settle in, roast marshmallows, barnaby tells a story about a vampire broomstick. then we go inside the tent and play truth or dare. im asked to pick at one point which of my friends id most like to have with me if i were to get lost in the woods. i pick barnaby because hes the one who asked, but really id probably want merula there more. barnaby is supposed to be into dueling but ive never seen him in a real fight. ive seen merula take a Cruciatus curse and then get up and walk. pennys whole thing is potions too. i thought this choice would be relevant to something in the event but it was not. 

in the truth or dare game, merula gets bill to tell some embarrassing stories about charlie as a kid. he talks about charlie putting wings on their rat and a dragon mask on their owl, pretending that they are real dragons. everyone laughs.  this his a cord with charlie though and he storms out. we wrap up truth or dare and go to bed. 

the next day we begin the search.charlie has not come back yet. we realize this and begin freaking out, start looking for him instead. we scare a mother dragon off its nest for unfathomable reasons. eventually we hear charlies voice coming from inside a cave. we go in, charlie is alive and uneaten, but has a broken leg. he ran off to find the egg by himself in order to prove himself as teen boys are wont to do. bill and i then realize the other 3 didnt follow us into the cave, and a big ol dragon walks in. i gotta fight it singlehandedly while bill heals charlie in the back. 

the boss fight was actually pretty hard. it took me like 5-6 tries to beat the dang thing thing. much enjoyment many high stakes. i put a sleeping spell on it to stop its attack at the end, though i had the option to use the Cruciatus curse which seems a little intense, game. then the other 3 run in and are like cool your safe! sorry we couldnt help u fight the dragon, there was a dragon. im like “yes, understandable.”

bill had given up on finding the egg at this point, but then charlie finds it! its a gold egg. in retrospect this egg might have been the egg that will inspire the gold egg stealing challenge in hp book 4 but i forget if that was inspired by a story or not. 

then we have a cool down level with bill and charlie, where they both apologize, and charlie says what he did was stupid, but i insist its wasnt stupid it was cool and good even though that is factually wrong because thats what i would say in real life regardless. bill and charlie promise to never speak of this trip again, especially not to their mom. 

the last level is us going back to gringotts and regaling griphook with the tale of our journey, including the marshmallow and truth or dare bits. he says “great job, teens!” and then we all jump up in the air and the theme song plays as we freeze midair and the colors fade to black and white. we all learned some valuable dragon based lessons today friends. it took me 2 full hours to write this and i have to wake up at 6 tomorrow. 

#hp #sirius business #hphm #harry potter hogwarts mystery #hogwats mystery #dragon #charlie weasley #bill weasley #penny haywood #merula snyde #barnaby lee #goblins #goblin #griphook #rambling #Thoughts

[iluviella-cuthallian-101]

The End of All Ends - Argument

Note: Please do not repost or reblog unless permission is given. This is my WIP book as the title suggests this is just an argument section.

"Why are you here?" One of the Guardians demanded, as none other as Denarion entered. Usually Iluviella would have stopped her, but this time she didn't. It was because she didn't like the idea that others were fighting her for her, but some part of her knew Denarion wasn't just her or the Guardians' issue.

"I am here because the Guardians are not doing their job of supposedly protecting and defending the people." Came the harsh reply, spat at her and meant as an insult to wound. It failed.

"The Guardians are doing their job!" She protested; sounding almost like she were pleading with him to understand that we needed more time. "To defend. To protect. To bring Order where there is only Chaos. That is the Oaths we took."

"Then the Council will do ours if and when we see progress." He stood measuring up to her. He wanted her to falter. "Your oaths mean nothing to us."

"How dare you suggest...!" The Guardian spoke up.

"The Council and I are not ruled by you." He interrupted. "I will not bow to the Guardian Order, that was corrupt and vile and does not recognise the authority of its own council!" They were grasping onto an authority, he knew they didn't have and no longer existed and Iluviella merely held out her hand to calm the situation down, just as she believed Eru would have.

"If I wasn't mistaken, we are no longer bound to your rule, Denarion." Iluviella stated in her defense. "The Guardians..."

"...fell to the Chaos in the Beginning when you ventured into the Void yourself, how are we so sure that we are not being led to our demise through segregation and conflict within your own ranks?" He asked.

"There is none." The Guardian interjected. "Iluviella is our last and only hope, she will save us." She believed everything she said and her conviction meant he had a weapon against her.

"You are a fool, Guardian, for believing in false ideals." He began smoothly and Iluviella kept a raised hand but this time to prevent her from intervening.

He continued. "She is unfit to rule, she is a weapon and as such cannot be trusted, she exiled and should never take that place as Leader or otherwise again. By not eliminating the demon threat, she shows that the people are not safe under her banner." He gestured to Iluviella as his cold grey eyes became fixed in her direction, tongue poised ready to spout whatever poison he felt the need to use.

"People will die. That is inevitable. What matters is that I - that we all do our best to make sure there is as fewer deaths as possible." Iluviella stated calmly.

"Which you wont do by letting the demons have their sympathy." His words hit a wound and he smirked almost triumphantly. "Especially by keeping those, however few, by your side."

"Don't. Test. Me." she growled warningly.

He tutted in response. "You should know better to threaten us."

"It wasn't a threat." Iluviella stated plainly before she unsheathed her sword pointing it to his neck as he stood against the marble pillar. "I will not hestitate to do the right thing, even if that means slaughtering any and all opposition." she uttered and lowered her sword, remembering that this was what he wanted. A reaction from her.

"Good." He replied.

"But I will not condemn innocents to the same fate." she explained sheathing the blade.

"I hardly call the demons innocents."

"The animosity of Rune's demons is well known but there are those that do not agree and thus will perish at his hand." Indeed she knew that the job included saving the universe and not just one part of it. This is what Denarion needed to learn; that the Guardians, despite previous wars, believed in equality. "I will not leave them or my companions to die. I will not exterminate an entire race just because of the actions of one Demon Lord." her voice was raised angrily in defiance of his words.

"Who is leader of them all." he carefully reminded me, correcting my words.

"For now..." Iluviella turned ready to leave.

"Your anger and ill attitude will be the death of us all. The council will not stand for this. Neither will the universe. The demons need putting in their place and if you cannot tell me another way, then do not brand me a tyrant."

"So you will do nothing?" she stopped, turned asked, almost with tears in her eyes from being frustrated. "The universe was not created so that you may sit on the sidelines and do nothing!" she shouted.

"Neither was it created for you to play the supposed Saviour by offering up the universe to the supposed friends of yours."

"At least I act when even those who created this universe do nothing."

"We are acting."

"By butchering thousands of innocent lives every day?! Not all demons are the same and I hope to prove you that fact."

"If you believe in saving your people you will deem it right to stand down for the good of the universe."

"So that you can get away with murder?"

"I only kill those that-"

"That don't fit your ideals." she finished not waiting for another word to cone from his mouth. "Slaughtering them is not the way to handle such a situation. You forced their hand to defend themselves out of fear, and now as I try to piece it back together, you've sought to ruin me and the Guardians and allowed them access to pockets of our universe in the meantime and allowed Rune back."

"Eradication of demons is the way forward, I'm sorry, but I cannot see another way."

"Then let me do my duty."

"You are a weapon, Iluviella, you cannot be allowed this."

At that moment a figure appeared. "You have not heard the prophecy then."

"I did not come here to be lectured on myths and false prophets who claim she is the only one able to save us all."

"No, but she will succeed, she has to." the figure remained calm, precise, though he neglected to pull down the hood of his robes.

"She should be sent to the Void and yet here you are rewarding her with alliances and power when she has no right." Denarion paused before stepping close to her face and uttering with disdain, "You have no right."

"I have the only right." she told him as her fist tensed up at her side and looked him in the eyes as a challenge.

"Then why did the Guardians split in the first place, hmm?" he asked her almost smirking, even when he realised he was nearing his defeat in this verbal disagreement.

"Because most believed in her whilst the rest followed your ideals of a false claim that you could create a better world without us." The figure took on a persuasive tone that only irritated Denarion further.

"A better universe." he repeated still convinced that he was right all along.

"Why? What makes you think it will be better?"

"You are not the universe's only salvation." he spat back in rage at her. "For may years have the Council advised the higher powers. The Valar have more power than you in such matters." he raised his head almost triumphantly. "Why have they not done anything about it, hmm?"

"I do not know." came the curt response from Iluviella.

"Then why make it an issue at all?" he wondered aloud, sounding smug and proceeded to circle her, like a predator its prey. "Why not do nothing? Why should we trust them? Do you deny the way that Eru supposedly works?" Denarion knew his words would hit a nerve as soon as he mentioned Ilúvatar, for she was both duty and honour bound to their Creator.

"Indeed not, but then power is an illusion because after all, if it were really the Valar that held all of it then why do we believe that Kings possess power?" Iluviella asked, pausing to allow her question to make sense in his extremely hollow mind.

"Power can be earned and given then taken away within an instant. So who would you have us follow if not those whom we serve?” she asked. “I mean no disrespect or ill manner but if I am right; it is only when you lose everything that you realise you were blind to see the damage it causes.” she paused and the bowed. “But...I digress. Unions with the demons may mean your doom yet, here I thought that we were masters of our fate. Or are we really tied to the prophecies of the Powers of the world in this?” Iluviella paused allowing the weight of her meaning to sink in briefly. “We face a common enemy and if we do not stand as one, what hope does the rest of the universe have?”

"It is not our responsibility." his cool voice spoke once more in a simple reply as his shoulders deigned to shrug.

"Yet you and others hereby claim that the Valar have done enough, so why trust them to carry out another of their duties?" The hooded figure inquired, becoming intrigued as to what point Denarion was trying to portray.

"So we should believe you whose seen vague visions on a threat that we do not see?" "Just because I have seen something, it does not mean that we cannot alter the foundations of reality by changing the fabrications of future. You refuse to believe what you have seen, yes? But what happens if the universe falls because of one being believed that he had all the power, hmm? How would we be able to change such a miserable fate? Then whose responsibility is it? Ours or theirs? Would it still be theirs because they fell for one of Rune's deviances and machinations, which we allowed? Because that would only suggest that he is quite capable of fooling everyone in this entire universe. Or is it ours because we chose to stand aside and let darkness descend? Because we refused to stand together and hold hope in our hearts?” she posed the question to see whether he would explain his intentions. “If we do nothing to aid the citizens of this universe by refusing to work as one, not only have we forsaken our oaths but we would be just as bad as the Valar.” she spoke plainly in the last moment.




Iluviella felt sad that she would be seeing this happen, yet she desperately wanted to understand why there was such a hatred. Why there were lies, scheming and the illusions of supremacy, when clearly none would get anyone anywhere except the Void.

"What of Melkor? Why has he been someone whom you wished to forgive so naturally?"

“If we do not forgive ourselves and each other...” she briefly glanced in Mairon's direction and wished he would take what he could from this. “...then the darkness has already prevailed. Perfection is what many strive for, but in imperfection only will you begin to see the beauty of what is within. It is then, and only then, that you fully appreciate that beauty for what it is and you realise that perhaps forgiveness is what is best given.” she paused and turned her head to Denarion whom she now focused on.




“The demons aren’t perfect and perhaps maybe the Valar aren’t perfect, Melkor certainly isn’t, but does that mean we abandon the hope that somewhere the light will shine through and thus reveal that reverent beauty? For not all was imperfect in the beginning, even we were not so. Yet in order to see such beauty and love, we would have to save it.” she replied, a small and gentle genuine smile flickering over her lips. A gentle sigh escaped her as she dared to continue her speech, only wondering if it was wasted breath. "Right now, infighting is what they want because they are terrified to see this universe united under one banner and the power of our combined voices and weapons." she almost pleaded with him to change there and then, but regrettably he shook his head as the Guardian too tried reason.

"Don't you see? We are giving them what they want!"

The hooded figure stopped the Guardian and gestured for them to leave.




"I had hoped that we could show them who we are. That this universe was as defended as we all make it out to be, but..." Iluviella drew the attention back to her and she rubbed the bridge of her nose with her delicate forefinger and thumb. "...as you’ve made your decision, alas I cannot stop you.” she answered, as the smile became a wry one and her eyes focused away to the distance for a moment.




"You speak as though you have seen such love and light in another, perhaps that is what has illusioned you so." Denarion dared to state his observation clearly, and without remorse but a solemn sigh too escaped him as exhaustion took its toll.

"I speak as a voice of reason amongst a sea of doubt."

"No doubt you believe that."

Iluviella paused taking in that remark and thought carefully. "A wiser soul than I said: You are required to do nothing least of all believe. Shut one's eyes tight or open one's arms wide, either way one's a fool. Believe what you will, however, for it is not I who decides." she explained.

"I am not sure what to believe." was what broke the silence.

"A statement that possesses more wisdom than it implies. Be always aware, or is it oblivious? I can never remember."

"Your point is?"

The hooded figure entered again but this time to leave and to offer his final words before he nodded his head in Iluviella's direction before she acknowledged it with a slight inclination of her own in return. "This threat is greater than you realise Denarion." he said in his departure.

"Ha! What do you mean it is greater than we realise?"

"Either the threat is more or you realise less. Or, perhaps, the threat is nothing. Or perhaps you realise nothing." her voice purred, now taking advantage of his pride and using her wisdom against him.

"That's absurd." he retaliated.

"That's life." she answered with a casual shrug of her own shoulders.

"This changes nothing." Denarion pointed out as he briskly walked out the door in which he had first walked through.

"Then you realise nothing." Iluviella uttered before marching off in the opposite direction. “We should stand together, against demons, not fight amongst ourselves.” she muttered under her breath as she continued walking to the meeting room to further plan her advance.

#OutofArmor #my writing #The End of All Ends

[the-pan-ace-writings]

Fallout February ~ Aftermath

  A/N this is a continuation of Delirium a little bit into the future, so this does hold a similar warning to Delirium but its much less actual violence 

Fallout February    Main Masterlist 

    It took months for Riona to be able to sleep through the nights again, and almost every waking moment she could spend alone and working out she did. She didn't want to look at anyone disgusted and ashamed that she had been captured and reduced down to a pathetic weeping mess. 

   She only communicated with Codsworth and the general on occasion outside of the security of the darkness. She was fortunate that Preston had enough tact to not bring up her sleepless nights and his comforts. He was worried about her, she might have been able to survive in the world before but he's seen her push herself too far too many times. She had a bad habit of discovering things that were dangerous to her. He was convinced that her more than normal weakness to radiation was due to her being pre war, which they had discovered after a feral encounter but was confirmed the first time she was caught in a rad storm. 

    She was high strung all of the time, she couldn't stand cramped spaces anymore and would anxiously rub at her wrist when she was stressed. She refused to wear anything less than a full shirt and would refuse any assistance in healing up her back. And the sound of heavy boots still unsettled her.

    Preston had made it a habit to stop by her home every evening at the end of his patrol to check on her, and oftentimes would have to convince her to go to bed or at least just sit and relax. He had to talk her down from going off back to the Corvega plant multiple times, they needed her to get better and heal fully before he even dared allowing her out of Sanctuary and while she resented it she could understand it. 

    Preston was finishing up his patrol around the settlement, shift change coming up allowing him to go check in on Riona. When he got to her door he knocked twice and walked in, noticing a distinct lack of light. 

    “Mum, you must come out!” Codsworth was half shouting through the bathroom door clearly fumbling with the lock. He made a sound of frustration and knocked on the door again half bumping into it. 

   “Codsworth what going on?” Preston had set his boots down near the entrance to the hall and put his hat on the shelves there. Codsworth turned around in surprise throwing his limbs in the air in exasperation

    “She's locked herself in the restroom! I don't know what happened, she worked herself into a tisy and now wont come out.” he sounded panicked, “I cant open the door with my hands, either.” 

   He frowned and walked over to Codsworth and the door. 

   “I'll deal with this, why don't you step out for a little bit?” Codsworth hovered hesitantly his eyes bobbing anxiously between the door and Preston.

    “Please help her,” he sounded defeated and glided away. Bumping into the walls on his way out, Preston only moved to knock on the door after he heard the front door shut with a thump. 

   “Riona?” He pressed his ear against the door trying to hear for her. He could hear the sound of running water and sniffling now that Codsworth wasn't blundering at the door. “Riona? Are you okay?” He knew for a fact that she wasn't, she hasn't been since they rescued her. “You know I'm going to have to come in if you don't say anything.”  He waited, waiting for any sound of movement to indicate that she was going to unlock the door and just let him in, instead he heard the sniffling go silent. 

   He crouched down to look at the handle of the door, and took out a lock pick set similar to the ones the Riona used. He had been okay unlocking doors before he met her but over time she's shared her knowledge of lock picking with him, and thanks to that he got the door open in record time. He was careful opening the door, and specifically moving it slowly making sure he was in sight right away. 

    Riona was tucked into the corner between the sink and the wall, her head was pressed to her knees and her arms came up to cover her ears while she covered the back of her neck with her hands buried into her hair. It was a similar pose to what he had found her in when they found her. She was in sleeping shorts and surprisingly a tank top, her arms were bloody leaking from what looked like scratches. 

   The shower was on filling a few basins instead of being wasted down the drain. The room was lit with a few piles of melted candles that were coming close to being completely burnt out. Preston leaned over to turn off the water  and with the silencing of the shower he could hear her gasping like she was trying to control her breathing. He looked her over again, his forehead creasing with worry as he pulled out a med kit from the cupboards. 

   He sat down adjacent to her and waited. He's learned that it was best to let her uncurl from things like this, otherwise it was likely to send her mentally back to the janitors closet she had been locked in for so long. 

   When he heard her moving he made it a point to not look over at her and instead waited for her to respond. She slowly raised her head slightly uncurling herself and stared at Preston.  He was always calm no matter what was happening and she envied that, she remembered that she used to be like that. Had a grip on everything and could manage herself and the darkness but instead she sat on the floor of her restroom, arms torn apart from her own hand and in a half panic set off from staring at her scars from the room. 

   She sat up further her hair falling forwards messy from her handling and some sections slightly stained with the blood that smattered her hand. She had moved forwards unwedging herself from the sink, grunting quietly as knobs and other stuck out parts were dislodged from her and planted herself next to Preston. She reached out to grab his hand before pulling it back staring at the blood that was speckled there, and she inspected her arms that had become a blotted bloody mess, she moved away. 

   He started opening the med kit pulling out cleaning alcohol, cloth and bandages before he looked back over at her. 

   “What happened Riona?” His voice was compassionate and quiet, he put his hand out waiting for her to hand him hers. She looked away from him and found her reflection in one of the wall mirrors. She looked tired, and the lighting in the room only deepened her eye bags, her face was creased with stress lines and she watched as her face crumpled tears coming to her eyes before she turned away. She felt Preston’s had wrapped around hers and pulled into his lap, she could smell the bottle of antiseptic and she closed her eyes as preston cleaned up her hand moving to clean her arms. 

   He hadn’t questioned her further and just worked on cleaning her up and bandaging her. It had not taken long but she was starting to sag with exhaustion, he had adjusted them so that he was settled behind her and she leaned back on his chest while he cleaned up and bandaged her other arm. 

   “Every time I see them it sends me back.” She whispered as he had finished up, “it's just so much sometimes. I don't know.” she shook her head and had brought her knees back up to her chest. 

   “You don't need to know anything right now Riona, you'll get there.” She could feel his voice rumbling through his chest and she pressed further into him taking in the comfort. 

   “I'm sorry.” She turned further into him and she felt his arms wrap around her, they were swaying again. It was pulling her into sleep again and when he noticed he stood them up and collected her in his arms bringing her to her bed. 

    He had her all settled on top of the bed and a went over to her closet and pulled out one of the thicker long sleeve tops, helping her into it before tucking her into the bed. He was starting to step out of the room for the night when he felt her hands grip his fingers. “Can you stay?” her voice was quiet and sleep laced but her eyes were pleading and he just smiled softly down at her and nodded. She made an affirmative sound before rolling onto her stomach wrapping her arms around the pillow beneath her. 

    She felt the bed dip beneath his weight and once he was settled on his back, he placed his hand on her back feeling her breath. It took both of them moments to fall asleep comforted by the presence of each other. 

#fallout4 #fallout4 companions #fallout #fallout february #preston garvey #preston is the general AU #Riona #Riona Wyld #its not really a ship but if you'd like to read it that way go for it

[thehalfworld]

Fanfic MST: Forbiden Fruit: The Tempation of Edward Cullen, a Twilight fanfic [part 3]

I have to warn you all that this chapter has a rape scene in it. It’s completely ridiculous, and I really don’t know if that makes it better or worse. Proceed with caution.

Recap: Edward gave into tempation and tried putting the moves on Tiaa. She went along with it at first, but then pushed him away because they were in public and Edward already has a girlfriend. Edward seems to think Tiaa is a vampire, even though she doesn’t appear to be and his thinking she is doesn’t really make sense. 

Chapter 1 Previous chapter

AN - hi guys hope u like this one im quite proud of it! 

That’s a bit worrying.

thanx for the suport from my frends love u girls!glad u like it! oh an VINCENT ur so dumb of course tiaa didnt go to math in only her bra shes not a total ditz! 

Hey, you never said she put her shirt back on! Actually, you also described Edward ripping it off her, and we know it’s made out of fishnet, so… I kinda doubt she still has a shirt left to put back on.

one more time...DONT READ IF U DNT LIKE IT!

I can’t imagine not liking this story. I’m being serious. It’s a masterwork. It’s right up there with “My Immortal” in my eyes.

NO frickin flames what is the POINT of flamin ppl there is NO POINT so f off!

I think the point is to annoy the author. Which appears to be working.

Capter 3 – uncle larry

Wow! Really looking forward to the capter!

I sa t alone watching tv at dave and maries house. I couldnt stop thinking about my encounter with Ewdard Cullen earlier that day. He was so beuatifull and sexoy with such amazing hair and eyes I could hardly believe he had notice someone like me! 

Just me or is she a tad fixated on his hair?

Also… Tiaa isn’t the sort of girl who blends in, and she knows it. She’s aware that she’s pretty and she’s used to getting attention — both positive and negative — because of her looks. She’s also loud (she yelled at Edward when he bumped into her), and she dresses in a manner that… well, let’s just say most small-town high school students don’t dress like Tiaa. This girl isn’t ordinary and she’s well aware of it. Why the false modesty?

But I was angry at how he had made me feel, how I'd burnt like crimson hot flame wean he touched me and how he'd not listened to me when id' told him to fring off, and how he dared to touch me at all when he had a GF anyways, even if she was a mean girl with an ugly heart and not that hawt. 

Not only has she not met Bella yet, she hasn’t heard anyone talk about Bella either, so I don’t know how she came to the “she’s a mean girl with an ugly heart” conclusion.

But nomatter how much I try to hate him, I simply couldn't. Suddenly the phone range

"hello "

"hey, is that altantiana?"

"yah who is this?" I aksed.

"its Mike nooton from your class! 

She hasn’t met Mike yet either, unless that happened in the deleted scenes or something. I guess, if he called her house phone, that he could have got Dave and Marie’s number out of the school directory… but this seems a little weird if they’ve literally never met.

I was wondering if your wanted to go to La Plush with me too morrow night maybe? 

To clarify, he is talking about a beach. He means La Push. Stuffed animals are probably not involved.

Theres a party on the beech with whole crowd of us going and I thought you seemed relay nice so I thought maybe youd want to me my date please? -

I can maybe buy that a high school boy is desperate enough to ask a random pretty girl to a party with him in the hopes that maybe it’ll kindle some sort of romance, but this is a really bad way to go about it. Asking out a girl you’ve never met is… not the best plan. Why not just frame it as inviting her along because she’s a new student and it would be a good opportunity for her to hang out and make friends? You don’t have to be explicit about your crush before you’ve even had a conversation with her.

Also I think Mike is already dating Bella’s friend Jessica, but fuck her, I guess.

"arent you the guy who hangs out with all the pathetic chearleaders and stuff?" I asked

"you mean bella and jessica's gang? 

I’m gonna wait a bit to talk about how weird it is that Bella is hanging with a “gang” of cheerleaders, but like… why does Tiaa know Mike hangs out with them? Again, this is their first conversation, and (as far as we know) the first time she’s even heard of him.

Sometimes I guess but theyr'e way shallow and not as hot as you. 

He’s maybe undermining his own point there.

And they can be mean sometimes.-"

So… like anyone, then?

"then why do hang out white them then you shallow CREEP!and why are you askin me out when you harely no me mike! Cos u think im' hot? Why cant you see your just as shallow if you want to date someone just cost of what they look like - I'm not THAT pretty anyways! 

Oh, Tiaa, you and I were on the same page until you pulled the fake modesty card. Besides, isn’t this a bit of an overreaction? He asked you to hang out with him at the beach, it’s not like he’s proposing marriage or anything.

And even if i was, I'm SO screwed up in the bran you cant even imagine! u would no want to date me if you new how screwed up I was!"

What exactly does she mean by “screwed up in the brain bran”? Like, are we talking legitimate mental illness, or is this just teenage angsting? And, in either case, what exactly is her problem that makes her undateable? This is about the vaguest possible rejection, and I don’t know if she’s implying something is actually wrong with her or that she’s just Not Like Other Girls.

"I would, tia, beleive me I would! Your so beautiful you cant even imagine. Your so pretty people lose there minds when your around and forget there names and forget to brethe! 

That’s your only reason? She’s pretty? Weren’t you saying something about cheerleaders being shallow a minute or two ago?

How can't you have noticed that? 

Decent point, actually. If your character is dropping jaws and turning heads with her beauty, either she’s aware she’s beautiful or there’s a reason she doesn’t realize. Like… maybe Tiaa thinks the people staring at her are doing so because of how she dresses, not because they think she’s pretty. Tiaa has actually seemed pretty aware of her effect on others throughout, though, so unless she’s just playing modest around Mike for some reason this scene doesn’t make any sense.

And I don't CARE how screwed up you are! It only maked you more interesting! 

He’s not even gonna ask for clarification on that?

Your cool and different and you are honest about stuff! you are right to be angry with me. I'm sorry for benign shallow and dumb just give me a chance to show you how much I care, please? "

The argument he’s making would probably be way more convincing if this wasn’t, you know, their first conversation ever.

"well...ok maybe ill go along if I dont have anything else to do" i said, not believing a word he said about how pretty i was.

Oh, come on.

"thank you altantiana thank you so much!" he sounded so happy I couldnt help but smile as I put the phone down but my smile faded as I return to my thoughts. Mike Nooton was kinda cute and seemed like an ok guy but he was nothing next to Ewdard Cullen. 

Yeah, I guess when compared to the weird dude who tried to fuck you in a locker room and threw a shirt at your head Mike really isn’t worth a second thought.

Even though I was anger with edward than I have ever been with anyone in my life and part of me wanted to chop his head off with a sore, a part of my soul would all ways remain in that coridoor where we had kissed so hard and passionably. 

My mistake, they were in a hallway, not a locker room. Not sure if that’s better or worse, but, depending on how busy that hallway normally is, it’s probably worse.

I creamed myself. 

Didn’t need to know that.

My heart had soared that day like never before, and i new that no one else would ever make me feel like that again, then I thought how he was a cheater and a bastard and my face burnt with shame. I couldn't beleive I had behaved like such a hore. 

I mean… she didn’t, really. She went along with his advances up to a point, and it doesn’t really show good judgement on her part, but he was the one acting like a “hore” in this situation. Putting the moves on a random girl in a public space when you’ve already got a girlfriend? Keep it classy, dude.

I was scared of the affect he had on me.

Effect. “Affect” is a verb. Nice sentence otherwise.

(Okay, if you’re a grammar pedant, “affect” isn’t always a verb… it can also be a noun, when we’re talking in a psychology context, which Tiaa isn’t.)

"bye tiaa! We'll be back on Thursday ok?" mari put her head rind the door suddenly

"Ok then, have fun" I wispered clammily..dave and marie where visiting relatives for a few day.

Convenient. Two less characters for the author to have to deal with.

Wait, no, oh my god, I just remembered what happens in this chapter.

"you look so pretty" she says, smiling -your the prettiest gril i've ever seen!”

I… okay, that’s some natural dialogue.

"omg whatever" I reply. I hated it wen people say that. 

Come on, girl, it’s just a compliment! Not like she’s hitting on you! At least I hope not.

I pulled my blond hair over my face. I was wearin a short hot pink dress cut low with black lace frills at the bottom and black lace stocking.

I kind of like that Tiaa is a goth girl who likes bright pink. There are plenty of real-life goth girls like that, but you pretty much never see them in fanfiction.

"daves brother larry will be looking after you wile where gone you'll be ok when where gone wont you tiaa? I hate to leaven you alone like this!"

You know “leaven” is what you do to bread to make it rise, right?

"i don't need a freakin babysiter u no!" i was so embarasing, I could look after myself!

Freudian slip? I mean, she is pretty embarrassing.

Marie smiles and leaves the house.

Marie doesn’t give a fuck, it seems.

"greeting a;latnaniana my names uncle larry" said uncle larry, he came in threw the door he was fat and bald with tiny black eyes and a red face

You know he’s a bad guy because he’s ugly. That’s how it works!

"Hey - i said

"your the orphan arent you" he says "is it true you kiled your mother when she gave birth to you?”

Nice to meet you too, Uncle Larry.

"Wat!" I cry, my eyes filling with tears

"your an evil bich arent u? Go outsite and wash my car" he shouts angerly

I’ve just thought of a fun game. There are five more chapters left. Let’s all place bets on which chapter Uncle Larry will get horribly murdered in.

I stood up and left to wash his car. I got soap and a bucket, afraid of what he would do if I refuzed. I went outside and started to wash hush car it was a red porche. He came outside and wached me and I new he was waching me! 

I know the implication is he’s watching her in a pervy way, but if I was making someone wash my car and I didn’t particularly like them I’d keep an eye on them too.

After a minite he came over and hit me hard across the face

"wft!" i shouted

What Fuck The?

He poored the bucket of water all over me and hit me again,. I was wet and crying and he started to rip my dress and bra of me and rip my clothes. He touched my naked breats and I try to push him off me I screamed at him to stop but he did'nt. He bent me over the bonet of his car and spanked me on the ass for half an hour then he pulled my panties down and started to rape me!

I really don’t want to be laughing at a rape scene, because rape is one of those things that’s just inherently unfunny, but… this is testing me. I mean, an entire half hour of spanking? The dramatic announcement that he began raping her after he forcibly stripped her naked and spanked her for thirty minutes, as if this is a surprise? The fact that all of this is happening in plain view of any neighbors Dave and Marie might have? Good lord. I truly do not know how to react.

I also have to wonder why Tiaa makes little attempt to fight back here. It’s pretty reasonable to freeze up when you’re violently attacked, but Tiaa has proven that she’s both capable and willing to fight off anyone she perceives as a threat (kung fu babie!) previously in the story. Is Uncle Larry too physically powerful for her to win against? We don’t really know how big he is compared to her, and Tiaa has been described as strong and fast previously. Both of them are unarmed, and, if there are neighbors, the noise should alert someone to what’s going on (Tiaa has been shouting/screaming throughout). Why is he getting away with all this? Oh, right, plot reasons.

"stop raping me!" I cry but he didnt stop! 

Shocker.

The pain was terrible even tough his manhood was small. 

Didn’t need to know about his dick, thanks!

I cryed and cryed but he didnt stop for hours and when he finally stopped he left me on the floor and spat in my face and left me there. 

Wait… hours? This guy has impressive stamina.

I pulled on my clothes and cryed madly and ran off into the seething darkness of the midnight street. I ran and ran un till I came to some woods and then I fell down in the woods and cryed.

“Seething darkness of the midnight street” is a pretty good phrase, actually. I mean, super cheesy and doesn’t really mean anything, but if this was lyrics some alt-rock band wrote I’d accept it.

Suddenly a blast of white light exploded in head and my mark on my hand burned like a flame. I closed my eyes and saw the face of a tall white man looking over me with no expression, his eyes were burning red and his face glimmered cold and bright as the moon,. 

It was… VLODEMONT AND DA DETH DEALERS!

I fell back from the brightness of his body, his hair was dark as night,.

It was… VOLSEMORT IN A WIG AND DA DEATH DEELRS!

"atlantiana?" he whisperd in a voice softer than clouds -my daughter?-

Well, we all saw that one coming a mile off.

"omg" I whisperd as my mind went blank and the world went dark.

I hope she whispered the acronym instead of saying “oh my god.” Her dad will be totally confused! Old people don’t know how acronyms work!

Next chapter

#forbidenfruit.mst #fandom:twilight #halfworld.mst

[trpg-dingusmaster]

The plot was actually furthered! And a new character joins the party.

I missed a few sessions, not sure how many. Time isnt real.

anyway. a week or so ago, maybe two? The dm for the evening was running 90lbs FineCoal, though nobody knows I call it that.

a few things happened since I was there for this campaign.

- the new guy in the group (who I met during Bassun on the Sea) is playing a gnome pyrotechnic in this game

- the gang/faction we are most at odds with blew up a children’s hospital in what I assume was retaliation for liberating their sweatshop and stealing the rights to the land it was on but I’m not sure.

-new things were added to our base of operations but none of those were new bedrooms or a kitchen upgrade so its still cramped and weird like theres like 6-9 people living there but only 2 bedrooms? I assume this is what my character was doing while I was gone. 

this session, as we went into town to restock things and sell stuff we noticed a new faction running around putting up fliers and standing on corners looking official while giving an announcement.

“By the decree of the Templars in one week all citizens will be reporting for a mandatory community meeting. We will be patrolling the streets until then to be certain that everyone attends and that no trouble is caused. Nonattendance is punishable by law.”

we did some investigating on who these people are and found out that they’re pretty basically the military police? they are I think supposed to answer only to the highest authorities but its possible they may not be in full cooperation but maybe thats just me thinking too far ahead. They may also have, or at least at one time had, some kind of agreement with the gang the party is against the most. Rumors say they are probably the reason magic no longer exists in the walled up nation.

time passes and we head to the meeting, the gnome is dressed up and disguised to look more like a child in hopes he’d be able to sneak around and investigate further. Hugo supplies him with some booze, coal, and sawdust/wood scrap to assist in any explodey shenanigans he might need to get up to.

He is however captured, somehow they know right away that he was in disguise. Based on how the dm described the encounter its not clear  if its because of the rolls the gnome and healer made to craft the disguise OR if they had some other means, perhaps some magical means, to see through the disguise. 

they load him up in an armored wagon to pick up other stragglers to the meeting and he gets a view of just how numerous and well armed the templars are. the gnome, wanting to stall some of them from being at the meeting or maybe bringing them to a trap says that he knows of a factory where the children are still working and are being withheld from the meeting.  The templars say theres no time but would like to go there later and arrest the factory workers or something so he did the only reasonable thing and set the wagon on fire from the inside, eventually the wagon stopped and the doors were opened and he weaseled away to rejoin the party at the meeting.

mean while the oh so important address the templars wanted to give was a strange one.

-several books are now banned possession and reading of these books is punishable to the full extent of the law. some of these books were: the complete writing of alexander graham bell, the notes and diaries of nikola tesla, the legions, the crystal eye, history books from this year to this year, historical writings from these authors,  

-all crystals, precious, and semi precious gems are now outlawed, ownership and use of any is punishable to the full extent of the law

-immediate search and seizure would begin, no back aly, mine, sewer, or forest would go unchecked

this was an odd because most of the citizens and even the players themselves are unable to read in the first place and are much too poor to own any crystals or gems.

never the less how dare they and Hugo threw a bottle at the speaker. the gnome caught the tail end of this and he, the healer, and the healers sibling set to starting a riot. claiming that these new regulations were going to raise taxes and the seizure of the gems was literal out right theft from people too poor to probably have any of worth anyway, it would disrupt businesses and the searching would be more like ransacking and vandalism. 

hugo, the one handed girl, jamie, and the gnome then head off to the library once the riot seems to be getting going and the templars were all distracted. the healer- wearing a stolen high ranking gang uniform meets up with some lower ranking members if that gang  and convinces them that increased templar activity would mean without a doubt a crack down on their criminal activity. Sooner or later whatever hold the street gangs have over the people would no longer suit the forces that allowed them to gain so much power. these people spread that word. the people are in a full on frenzy now. 

Its also worth noting that a particular new npc was pointed out to us more than once during all of this: a very burly bald and beardless man well over seven feet tall but has otherwise only human features.

the group at the library find several books to steal but not quite enough and certainly not all the right ones. with further searching a secret door doubling as a book self hiding a spiral stair case is found and the one handed girl- being the one who can read the best of the lot is sent down to investigate. the rest stay upstairs waiting to hear her scream for help and to defend their position. the one handed girl finds several more books that the templars had listed as illegal but ALSO one that had a solid black binding and hundreds of blank black pages. upon picking it up she feels a powerful connection to it.

several templars enter the library and a fight begins, but it is quickly ended by the new oddly specific but unnamed npc. the group escapes, calling bruce the cabby to gather the party, drop three of members, healer, healers sibling and gnome head to the ruins hospital to loot. since there would be no one around to stop them what with the mayhem and murder happening. on the way the healers sibling witnesses and exchange between a templar and a higher ranking gang member, an exchange that suggested if the the two factions had any sort of agreement it was probably over/off the table now... but another interpretation could be: shut mouth don’t talk about that where someone could hear/see you. we don’t know yet. 

heres where I got confused because the prty split up, at some point during the looting the healer found a strage door that the bombing had uncovered? or made easier to access because it wasnt hidden anymore? with the gnomes help they enter leaving the sibling to continue to loot. there was a long tunnel? and then a strange chamber with strange device that when described was probably a tesla coil. There was also an unusually large person guarding the room about 8 feet tall and very burly. there was also a book in there. I’m pretty sure he was guarding the book, which I assume was the writings of tesla based on context. they gnome and healer question the guardian trying to figure out what he was and why he was there. for some reason a fight begins? the tesla coil is part of some kind of trap system that does some clever stuff but I didn’t catch it. the two kill him and loot his body we didn’t get a description of his face i’m pretty sure it was too messed up from the fight? or maybe I just missed it, but I cant help but wonder if he too was bald and beardless? 

when the group that headed to the cabin arrived, the one handed girl had begun investigating the books and discovered a note: unfortunately the note was a prop and the only one who could actually read all of the dms handwriting was me but HUGO cant read for shit, I’m not even sure he knew what books were until that day. but I don’t think the bits I picked out that others couldnt read were that important. 

what it amounted to seemed to be that, something happened and it might happen again and they- the templars we assume -could not let that happen. I’m pretty sure I read a bit that said like- ‘we cannot allow ‘them’ to rise again,” but I wont know if that particular bit is important until the rest of the books are examined but even if it is I think think the group will be fine.

there was also a very old bank note worth over 200 coppers but probably needs to be appraised, at least to figure out how old those books are/how long they were in that secret room? idk but I’m sure theres something important there... surely its not just because the dm is concerned the party will starve to death in winter and thought to give us extra money to survive with.

the three who went to the hospital got back to the cabin, I’m pretty sure they stole a wagon.

the plan is, to examine the books a bit, then wrap them in leather and seal the leather in wax to bury them where we will be building something, then also having some decoy holes dug/filled in? and if a templar is like wtf is all this- we explain that were in the middle of construction or something and thats where we’re building stuff? 

but I sort of suspect that have some magical or supernatural means of detecting things? so it might not matter... but if winters coming we probably need to have some weapons and defenses anyway because hungry wildlife is an issue we’ve been told.

the only book not getting buried is the black one- that is staying with the one handed girl. to what end? I’m sure we’ll find out.

Hugo is down to 44lbs FineCoal- the cabby requested payment in furs and meat instead of coal and copper this time around. 

the ruffian, the noble, and the nobles guard were not present again, I’m pretty sure they just don’t like showing up to these campaigns with the weird rules. 

#90lbs FineCoal #huntsman josiah hugo

[izzpeng]

Unsent Emails

25/08/2016

To: [email protected]

Subject: Surprise bitch, I'm back!

Dear Smithy,

First of all I would like to say, fuck you for telling me I wouldn't get an A* in maths just because I messed around in class too much. Second of all, I would like to thank you for being a fraction of motivation in my math studies. I have to admit, I liked you enough to study 10% harder than I usually do and for that you deserve a blog post dedicated to you, just kidding you worthless piece of shit who wont even dedicate your thoughts to me. But it's too late now, so you're very fortunate for even being mentioned in my oh so popular blog.

Thanks for being a great teacher/supporter/motivator/useless advisor/racist bastard/...friend. See you in the afterlife you dick.

With cold fury,

Izzati Azhan

To: [email protected]

Subject: God Bless the Lopez

Dear Lopezo Mighty,

You don't deserve a 'fuck you' because you knew my potential and only encouraged me day after day, with your sadistic humour and the quiet blazing fire dancing in your eyes which was the only sign that you're actually human. I'd express my gratitude in a 10,000 word essay but I'm sure you'll just read the introduction and conclusion and base my grade off those two paragraphs. But without your life coaching I would not have gotten A*A* for both my Eng Lit and Lang. Dare I say it, thank you for setting us a Date Wiv Des Tinny, those practice papers were torture each week but well worth it in the end. You are my spirit animal in all dimensions, maybe except in Hell where you'd be Satan but...

Stay Healthy Senôr!

With all my love (though you believe it is just another concept of convenience),

Izzati Azhan

To: [email protected]

Subject: bust out the roti, girl its about to get some of this izzatikkamasala

Dear Beenal the Brindian,

I know I know, this time its a fuck me for getting an A and not an A* but Miss I was 3 marks of an A* if that makes you feel any better, it does with me! I actually don't feel that thankful towards you since I do feel I did hm... mostly all the work, I took the exam after all. But an email of gratitude to show manners and my kissing ass abilities can't hurt can it? So terima kasih for all the lessons you spent dramatically telling us your stories, sometimes even twice of the same one, thanks for letting me doodle in class just because you talk a lot of the time and therefore I am allowed to half listen. I wouldn't be the indian food loving person I am today without you, oh and almost forgot... of course thanks for helping me achieve that almost A*! Fuck the examiner for me next time will ya.

With all my beloved assets,

Izzati Azhan

To: [email protected]

Subject: smile at me wit ur eyes, nat yo mouth only

Dear Turquoise Eyes,

I'd like to get to know the 16 yr old you but my chance has passed. Inappropriate flirting aside, guess what sir! I got exactly what I got in the most recent geo mocks 149/180 and I thought the mocks weren't an accurate indication. I'd like to thank you for having beautiful eyes and smiling at me even though on the inside you be like "lol fucktard thats the most incorrect answer ever, like not even close." I enjoyed your classes and you're sometimes funny but not on purpose, more like weird funny yknow? I think you'd like to get credit for my success but honestly i learnt how to answer case studies properly through Ajmal through Mr Cook, so who is really my teacher here? Me. Because I taught myself to sought answers and techniques elsewhere but sure I guess you can have some credit, those eyes deserve at least a generous 5%. lol ok bye tq

With a 9 on the Ritcher Scale,

Izzati Azhan,

You guessed it, the wait is over! #gcseresults2016 was trending on twitter and the sounds of 16yr olds packing their bags, getting ready to get disowned by their parents was the most honest and lit af song this year (after Frank Ocean's Blond of course). I admit its always nerve-wracking receiving results, where a single exam determines your ability to understand (or memorise) a two year course. But I had faith that with my prayers and hard work Allah gave me the results I truly deserved, so presumably my anxiety was on the down low while my trust in God was at sky high.

Alhamdulillah I got 3A's 6A*, I was so confident I would smash an A* with Business and Art but alas the grade boundaries proved me otherwise. With three fucking marks off an A* in Business I was so irritated at which examiner marked my paper, not irritated to risk a request for a remarking though. And Art, I hoped for an A*  but instead faced it's less prestigious sibling, an A. I asked around of course, not trying to compare or anything but I just needed to know what the students who I thought was for sure going to get A* actually got, to my delightful (?) surprise they too got an A which led me to believe that scoring an A* in Art is no easy business. Business isn't easy either lmao.

To this, I must admit defeat to my mother. She's been on my back for my choice of Art as an A-level subject saying its hard to score high in Art, but my cocky ass just waved it away and dismissed it altogether. Doubt has risen up in my throat, threatening my artistic capabilities to spill out across the walls of abandoned buildings as grafitti instead of street art. So thats something to think about before Saturday Morning.

UPDATE:

I attended Enrollment day alone, my heart beating, my eyes watering and my mind wandering. I chose to do IB diploma, for many reasons. I am just so drawn to how different it is, I think of all the future local Bruneians who did A-levels asking for the sam scholarship then I imagine the MoE going through the applications like "Great a-levels, a-levels, a-levels Oooo IB whats this?" and I just feel like I would have a standing chance you know? It would also help me to mix around with more international students and prepare for the university life so when I do go to university Insyallah I wont feel vulnerable and small.

But I just feel like my mother is against me taking IB, like she's trying to be supportive by giving a tight smile and grim nods but inside I know she's not convinced and this all happened on the way to the Arts Centre which made me even feel more queasy. My Father on the other hand, gave me a genuine "Go for it" which helped me so much on every level, I just need the motivation, just that little push to help me get going, feed me a trickle more of confidence.

So I had a choice to approach either Duckling or Dickinson on my IB subjects, and okay Dickinson was full okay there was a long queue and I ended up going to Duckling because I really had no choice! hehehhehhehehhe. Anyway I waved the papers in my hand high above to indicate that I was next and he laughed and told me to come and sit, so naturally I did. He took a look at my grades and praised me and then circled my subjects that I intend on studying, giving me advice that I should only need Math Studies seeing as how I'm not thinking of a mathematical kind of career. He then said " blablablabla Youre subjects are a smart choice, I think you're good to go, Welcome to the IB program"

And that was the clarity I was searching for, that little- push.

NOT JUST BCS HE'S HIM BUT BCS I NEEDED TO HEAR IT.

Just before that, Brindian approached me asking me  about my business results and encouraging me to take that remark because I was three marks off an A* saying that theres no reason I dont deserve the A*. I was uncertain because sure it makes me feel so fucking good about myself and so very satisfied, but who really needs an A* in GCSE Business to get accepted into a University? So I made a face. The face. and She went "What do you have to lose?" And of course one thing instantly came to mind "Um money?" then she gave me a look. The look. So I said I'll think about it and apparently only 1 or 2 students got A*. The thing is I actually would get it remarked if my Art grade also got bumped up to an A* but I have no idea what Ms Stroud is trying to do by contacting the exam board?

So thats that, she asked me about my ever so popular brother. So I told him oh he did well, she asked about which university and I replied Leicester and I told her that Im actually going off and missing 3 weeks of school. Then she went "oh you know Leicester's my hometown, in what area is he living because Im there in December" and i was like wtf creepy. And she continued saying "Oh Imagine if we just bumped into each other on the streets" and I was going to say something awkward because like what the fuck right? But Mr Duckling was open and ultimately saved me and she gestured me to go ahead.

After that, Mr mcluck approached me well not really, well kind of but it was super fucking awkward because I was waiting for my turn with Mrs Krüger and he was on the table nearby and made eye contact and he smiled and I returned it and i was like fuck am i suppose to go over lmao so i slowly sat down while he came over to me. YAKNOW gotta play hard to get. SO again he asked me are you happy with you results blablablabla were you nervous getting your results so I told him that I wasnt as nervous because other people were like "oh my life is over" and he laughed and blablablabla just mostly nodding and smiling. Then he asked me about my brother's results hi ok 2nd teacher to ask about my brother cool. I gave him a vague oh he did well and told him Leicester University on 18th September and I added that I was actually going to send him off and missing 3 weeks of school. Blablbalbalbalabl then he finally asked about IB saying that oh great choice.

And Wendy told me that at the YC Mcluck was talking about me to wendy asking me what I got and he saying that i Was exceptional kekekekkekekekk fuck man his eyes are so blue, dont think about it dont think about. Did i tell you I had a dream of him as Ben Affleck like wtf, first of all why would I even dream about him, maybe it was because I crossed his mind like just the night before omg. but whatever. Idk that made me feel so good about myself. Then Brindian thought that Fatin was Hana and approached Fatin and Wendy haahhahahahah and somehow started talking about me?? Like boi they both love me so much, I wonder if Lopez or Julibear bear talks about me like that. Sigh imagine

Smithy: Shes a fucking pain in the ass

Lupez: Intelligent fucking pain alright

Smithy and Lupez: But she's our pain in the ass.

OMGGGGGGGGG I loved all my GCSE teachers and classes! like those were the best days of my JIS experience so far. Art was super chill, she let us sing out loud together saying that we were the only class who did that and that she'll miss us :(((((((( Smithy couldnt care less, he just moved on click like that. Anyway, hope everyone got what they expected with their results or better and just remember kids, grades DO define who are and where you'll be in life. lol goodluck fam.

Izzati

[alsodiplodocus]

“Durchbruch” (Breakthrough) (Growth pt. 1) (2016)

I wrote this one while listening to a hell of a lot of Max Coopers old “Traum Series” stuff, which dictates the mood of whats going on a lot. The main idea of it, which i wont spoil, is from a song called “Plastic Plant” by Thee Oh Sees, which at some point mutated to something completely different from the actual song, but anyways - this is the first bit of three from a story called “Wachstum” (Growth) about a lonely mad scientist that wants to hold infinity in his hands but doesnt actually know what it means or what hes really doing, since hes just a limited human like us, sadly. If that sounds pretentious to you, you might be right, but i still had fun writing this. Maybe you’ll enjoy it anyways.

Click this thing to get to the story:

I never imagined that my whole life would once find its whole fulfillment in one single moment. I always thought it was impossible that after so many years of arduous labour everything would just click. Just fit together. A moment of unbelievable clarity. It was infinintely small, and yet this one moment encompassed all I worked for in all those years. In my tiny laboratory something just came to existence that will not leave anything in its place once I unleash it upon this world. Now I could finally experience this moment, even if it was just a split second. How many people know what this feels like? I can even barely describe it myself... But before I was able to fully relish it, it already flew by. The only thing still left is my sweet memory. This feeling will probably never come back, but at least i was able to welcome it for a short while. I closed my eyes and leaned back. Slowly, the realization of everything that just happened swept through my body. All the years of work were not going to be in vain. And the result of all this is right there in front of my on my laboratory table, emitting light and rumbling about while it functions. In the midst of heaps of sketches, post-its and discarded ideas it just layed there. And it was working. A small, round materialization of my childhood dreams. I put my instruments to one side and put it in my hands. I raised it, careful to not shatter all the intricate structures that I incorporated in it. How would I even explain this to the rest of the world? What was in my own hands was not just a silly invention of my younger days that people know me for. I have bult something that would change the course of humanity forever. This little capsule I was admiring would go down in history. I am holding infinity in my hands. But as i made a rough estimate of all the possibilities i just opened up, my senses overtook me and dragged me right back into reality - this is no time for dreaming.

The somewhat stupid looking grin of my former mentor and friend Thomas pushed itself into my field of view. You could see that he was excited in a way that a preschooler is excited when he gets handed his favourite ice-cream by his parents. "You finally did it, Alex! You were right all along, man!" He kept beaming at me. "Hey, why dont you put a smile on that face? Is this not what you wanted all along, are you not happy?" While i was wondering how he even got into my laboratory in the first place, Thomas gave me a pat on the shoulder. "Well then, we have to celebrate this, dont we? You earned it, buddy."

Thomas was one of those people without which I would not have made it here, whether I wanted to admit it or not. I met him when he was still my teacher in physics classes. Back then he always thought I was a dreamer. In basically every single class he had to tell me to stop daydreaming and finally pay attention, otherwise I would fail. But after I wrote my second A+, he told me to go talk to him after one of the lessons, and I decided to tell him about everything that was going through my head in those days of school. At that time I already began forming this dream that would one day bring me to this day. Initially, he treated me like some crazy teenager with some delusional hallucinations, but after every physics lesson, I came to him with my ideas and sketches, until he finally gave in and accepted that he didnt even know what exactly I was showing to him. One thing followed another, and he gave me a possibility to make my dreams a reality. He knew that he could only stand there and admire it. Meanwhile, I am 20 years old and Thomas is seeing his last years as a teacher.

I forced a smile and tried to look as natural as I could. "Thanks for the offer, but honestly I am just really tired. I... I just need a while." With a slightly disappointed smile Thomas just replied with a sigh and a resigned attitude. "Sure, if you dont want to, I am not forcing you to do anything. I know you too well. But think for a second, will you? For seven years you are trapped in your own four walls to chase after your wild dreams. You gave everything up just to be able to work even more. And now you did it, don't you understand? The result is right there! It exists!" He gestured towards the round capsule in my hand. "And now you still want to remain here? You finally have a chance to prove yourself out there, damn it! As long as your invention just lies there on your table, nothing will happen."

It was like this every time I found a breakthrough. Every single time Thomas would try to distract me from my work and convince me to go out into the public. But this time, he was right. For seven whole years I was living here in my laboratory, shielded from the outside. The only contacts i still have are the five helpers that Thomas organized, which became my best friends. If I'm not still stuck in my lab in the evening, working on my plan, I spend time with them, talk about technological advances or play billiard. The rest of the time I just sit in front of my little machine and refine some details or test the new prototype. Until it finally started working today. If not for Thomas, I would die of starvation with my face against the desk. Of course I was thankful. Because of Thomas, I was able to not worry about anything but the next step of my invention.

"Oh come on dude, now you are staring holes into the air again. You look like someone stepped on your face. Stop that.", continued Thomas. "Tomorrow morning, once you have slept all you want to, we are going to get you in top condition, and you are going to show the world what you made. Don't you remember what you told me when you started the project?" He started at me like I was suffering from alzheimers.

Of course I remembered. I wanted to build the ultimate energy source. Something that would solve the ancient problem of humanity to not have enough power for anything. And not just postpone the problem, but finally put an end to it. The little capsule lying in front of my on my table and producing electricity would push the development of technology into a direction it's never seen before. Besides me, of course. For eternity, we struggle to find out what the universe really is: Little advances into the inner workings of nature have always given us a bit of enlightment, made possible by ingenuity and brute force combined. Like the discovery of the higgs boson. The only thing we still need to make our ideas real is pure energy. And now it is time. We will never again have to worry about not having enough of everything. Just having the right amount of resources to keep us going.

Again, all the infinite possibilities of what my little machine means flowed through my head. We are going to build all the things we wanted to make for centuries. We are going to create all that which we thought was impossible. With this little energy capsule, we can dare to advance into territories that we always thought were not meant for us. From now on, nothing stops us. It's like I broke down a dam to give way for a flood. And all thanks to the little wonder in my laboratory.

I shifted my view back to the little capsule on my desk. I will call it Vision Generator. Then I turned back and looked at Thomas. I did not even know what to say. Single tears suddenly appeared on my face. For the first time in all these years, a tremendous feeling of fatigue set in. Thomas put his wide grin back on. "Well, I see you need some time to process all of this. We'll see each other tomorrow. I won't tell anyone, don't worry." And with those words, Thomas disappeared out of my laboratory and concentrated on his own plans. He shut the door. Finally, silence.

Tomorrow is going to be the time to tell the world about what I have created, and what is now possible. I stared at the sphere again. in the span of 7 years i created a tiny microcosm, with every single detail tailored and thought through with love.

I stood up. I would try to put my achievement into words tomorrow, now I just needed some sleep. I put my hands on my desk and slowly stood up to head for the laboratory door in the dark. Once it automatically opened, my room filled itself with the chilly light of the hallway lamps. To the left the hallway had a glass wall with a door leading to the meeting room of my assistants, and straight ahead was my bedroom. The three most important rooms of my last few years. To the right was a door that led outside, but only Thomas really made use of that one. While I staggered towards my room, a strange, unfamiliar sound echoed through the corridor. I looked to my left, a bit bewildered. Behind the glass wall were four of my assistants, assembled on a couch, and all of them were concentrating on the TV in front of them. It was showing the news. When was the last time I saw the news? Maybe five years ago? Or six? I could not even remember that there was a television in the meeting room. None of my assistants seemed to notice me in that moment. What could be so important?

I rubbed my eyes and looked closer. The broadcast was showing a hysteric reporter, flailing her arms and shouting something to her audience. The video was unsteady and behind her, the background was constantly in motion. I tried to distinguish what exactly was happening, but it was all blurry and vague. While the reporter tried to convey what was going on, there was a line running across the bottom of the screen. "Possibly mutated plants broke out of local New York homes and are spreading at incredible speeds." Am I seeing this right? My lack of sleep might cause severe hallucinations at this point. I tried to listen in to what the reporter is shouting, but her voice was clashing against the screams of civilians, the roaring traffic and some indescribable, rustling sounds. My assistents kept staring at the screen, mesmerised and fascinated. Another small bit of news hurried across the bottom of the screen. "First dead and injured citizen founds as a result of the plant catastrophy in New York." What now? Dead and injured citizens? How does that tie into all of this? Tomorrow I would try to explain to myself what on earth is happening outside. In all the time of isolation I probably either lost my mind or severely lost track of the outside world. The revelation of my machine would have to wait. My assistents also probably knew more. But in any case, I really ought to get some sleep.

I shuffled to my bedroom and went inside. When I finally sank towards my bed, what followed was probably the most cathartic and purifying sleep that I ever had. Yet when I opened my eyes the next morning to look forward to a new day of work, my whole body suddenly felt really stiff. I could barely move. I tried to switch the light on to have clearer sight, but something held me. Something didnt let me stand up. I slowly raised my head to see what was there. And when I saw what kept me tied to my bed, terror bolted through me. A huge amount of tendrils,  leaves and roots covered my whole body and had me in their firm, but gentle grasp. It was brimming with small and big twigs, blossoms, and all sorts of plants of all shapes and sizes. I had the terrible desire to scream, but for some reason it was not an adequate reaction. So I just stared. With my mouth wide open. As soon as I looked closer, I could see that it was all still growing. And not just my bed was taken by green, it was my whole room. Memories of the news broadcast from yesterday shot through my head. What in hell is happening to the outside world? But before I could get a clear thought, I felt something slowly growing at the back of my head. One of the countless tiny plants was making its way around my head. After a short time, my whole head was gripped by the thing, and after it was done, I had no room left to move it. And as soon as it reached my forehead, I was left with the feeling of nothing at all.