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veronicaphoenix · 7 months

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Chapter tags & trigger warnings: Japanese folklore, implied mentions of depression + substance intake. Mentions of sex. Noah is about to burst out, and Lia will too, eventually. | Word count: 3.5k | Cross posted on AO3. | Series masterpost. ✧.*

General trigger warnings: This work addresses and depicts issues related to addiction and violence, contains explicit sexual content, and explores themes of childhood trauma. Reader discretion is advised. +18

The house was full of people coming in and out.

Me and the boys were meticulously loading boxes into the back of the tour truck parked just outside the house. It was 10 a.m., and the best time to avoid traffic in the neighborhood.

It had been two weeks since I last saw Lia.

Last night I had tossed and turned, thinking of her, worrying about her, missing her, and eating myself alive thinking what I would tell her the next day, when I saw her. None of the scenarios I had played in my mind ever took place.

Despite the sun and the clear sky that morning, it was chilly outside, and I was wearing one of my hoodies and cargo boots. My phone pang in the pocket of my sweatpants and I moved to the side of the inside of the truck for a couple of seconds to let Jolly and Folio load boxes with the instruments. I had a text from Matt, letting me know about some last-minute change regarding the guests that were coming with us on tour. I started typing a quick reply and made my way to the exit.

As I jumped off the truck and turned the corner, I suddenly found myself face to face with her. My phone hovered precariously in my hands, almost slipping through my fingers as I attempted to reply to Matt’s message. Our eyes locked, and time seemed to stand still.

Lia looked as beautiful as always, except for the dark bags under her eyes that she had tried to cover with make-up and the fact that she looked thinner. She took two steps back and I took the two-second window to check her out. She was wearing black leggings and her jeans-jacket over a white t-shirt. Her hair was open and falling over her shoulders and chest.

Our emotions and unspoken feelings collided.

Surrounded by the tour truck and the remnants of our shared professional life, Lia and I seemed to stand on a precipice.

“Hey,” I said.

Lia replied to me with a soft “hi”. We both knew we were going to see each other again that day, but by the look in her eyes, it was as if she hadn’t expected it to happen until, I don’t know, maybe one minute to midnight.

I wanted to say so much yet I couldn’t bring myself to it. I wanted her to get on her tiptoes and kiss me on the cheek as she always did. I wanted to envelop her in my arms. I wanted to tell her how much I had missed her, and that I wanted her, and that I didn’t regret what happened that night, that I wanted to do it all over again and keep her with me forever because…

But we just stared at each other.

She was happy to see me, that much I could tell, but there was nothing else to say yet.

Not having any hope that anything would change at that moment, with all the things I wanted to tell her, I stepped aside and continued toward the entrance door, sliding my phone inside my pocket. But Lia spoke my name, calling me, and I stopped in my tracks, turning towards her with a small flare of fire in my chest.

“Yeah?”

“How are you?”

I assumed she was referring to my illness. I had been through some horrible days, but I was okay now. The fact that Lia was there had a lot to do with it.

“Better,” I replied, nodding. A simple word that held the weight of the uncharted territory we were navigating. She smiled slightly, a flicker of warmth. I was going to ask about her, but it was obvious, wasn’t it? She looked damn tired. “It hit me hard, but I’m on the mend now.”

“Good.” Her response was simple, yet it carried a wight of concern that spoke volumes. It was a relief to know that, despite the unspoken tension, there was still genuine care between us.

I made my way inside. Lia turned her back to me and walked to meet Steven, who was making sure that all the boxes that were getting loaded had a tag on them.

The house inside was still packed with many other boxes. They had delivered the new merch two days before and everything was stacked behind the sofa and in every corner available. Jolly had the bad habit of keeping the shoes he was going to take on tour lined in the house entrance, and on top of that, our suitcases were also creating a barricade between the living room and the open kitchen. The sofa was also quite a mess, for the fact that last night Jesse, Jolly and I had watched a couple of episodes from a new series on Netflix and we had left the blankets unfolded and dirty sweatshirts and socks on the floor. It was a scene of controlled disorder, a reflection of the whirlwind that awaited us on the road (and probably on the way back if no one bothered to sort out the house before we left).

Bryan, the perpetual documentarian armed with his camera, had brought two bags with his equipment and they were now open in the table in front of the tv, to make the scenario even worse. He wanted to record everything to make an after movie or something when the tour was over. Little did we know that the snippets he captured would transcend the boundaries of personal memorabilia. Some of those very moments, frozen in time by Bryan’s lens, would later find themselves on the grand screen of a wedding venue, immortalizing moment of our lives that now seemed trivial.

As many as we were in the house that day, we managed to organize ourselves pretty well. We were getting used to it. It was part of our job, and we knew how to roll with it more or less better than last time.

The next three hours went by pretty smoothly, with music in the background coming from the music videos playing on the TV. Despite some minor inconsequential arguments among us, we managed to make significant progress and get quite a lot of work done. At some point, Folio’s dad made a surprise visit in his Range Rover to check on us and offer help if needed.

Around half past noon, I found myself in the kitchen, engrossed in some tasks when Jesse, holding a mug of coffee, appeared through the hallway. The aroma of the freshly made drink lingered in the air. Nick had prepared coffee a while ago and now there were empty mugs scattered across various corners of the house. Two empty mugs rested on the kitchen island, mirroring my current focus on the iPad, while another sat on the small coffee table in the living room, where Lia had been working in merch-related paperwork, surrounded by a couple of blankets and sweatshirts. Her discarded Vans were still here.

Although we had barely acknowledged each other while we worked, there was an unspoken awareness of each other’s presence whenever we shared the same space. As I ventured in an out of the house, I saw her engaging with Bryan and Steven, and then with Jolly, who said something that made her laugh and then he tousled her hair.

“Has anyone seen my slippers?” Jesse asked to no one in particular. He looked around. Opposite to us, he was still wearing the same t-shirt he used as a pajama and the same sweatpants he wore last night. “This is a freaking mess. I’ve been looking for them for an hour.”

“I’m afraid,” Jolly said, coming from outside and putting a hand on his shoulder, “that you won’t see your slippers until we’re gone.”

“Next time try to be more organized when you plan to leave for a tour. Can you not actually keep your bags and shoes in your room until the day you leave?”

“My room is too small. I don’t know why the fuck we decided to move into this house.”

“The other one was too big for the three of us,” I replied while I moved to check one of the boxes by the kitchen isle. The other house had been perfect for us when Mike and Lia still lived with us. As soon as Mike moved into his girlfriend’s apartment and Lia decided to move on her own, it had become too big to manage for Jolly, Jesse and I, and we decided to rent a smaller place.

A while later, our mission to streamline the packing process for the truck felt like a Sisyphean task—each time I reentered the house, it appeared to be accumulating more belongings rather than less. Suppressing a muttered curse, I surveyed the chaotic scene, the disarray contrasting with our initial goal of simplifying the load.

As my frustration brewed, I spotted a figure at the end of the hallway.

Lia stood motionless in the threshold, her back turned to me, her gaze fixed on something inside that room. Maybe focused nowhere. Maybe lost in a realm of memories…

I called her name softly. She turned around, the movement deliberate, as if she had been waiting for me to appear and call her, and for a fleeting second, I believed that she could remember, that she could feel my fingers on her skin, how good I had treated her.

If I could have had my way, things would have been different; I would have pushed us inside of the studio, closed the door behind us and relived the intensity of our connection two weeks prior. Another part of me just wanted to be by her side without feeling this excruciating tension.

The way she looked at me could have brought me to my knees. There was something different from all the times she had looked at me before, when we were just friends. But it all faded away when she pretended to get distracted by something.

“Some of your clothes are on top of the drawer in my bedroom. If you wanna take them…” I started to say. I walked toward her, but an insurmountable distance lingered between us.

Her chest rose, as if she had been holding her breath the whole time we spent looking at each other.

“Okay,” it was a soft barely audible answer.

With that, she glided past me, and the mere proximity of her aura sent a pang of longing through me. How I ached for her, for hell’s sake.

I wanted to follow her inside, but I just watched her, and when I saw her coming out, she did so with her hands conspicuously empty. She didn’t even acknowledge me on the way out. She went straight to one of the pile of boxes in the living room and picked up two of them that were clearly too heavy for her.

“Hold on. Let me help you,” I rushed to offer.

“I can manage.”

“Don’t be so stubborn,” I shot back.

“I’m not.”

“The hell you are.”

That was our dynamic, but it felt off as I picked the top box from her and freed her from that weight that seemed to symbolize more than just physical baggage. As our eyes locked once again, we knew we would never be able to escape the echoes of that night if we didn’t sit down and put our cards on the table.

I was tired of it, and I had no idea this was going to follow me through the entirety of the tour.

We took a break for lunch. I offered to take the car and go to KFC and bring buckets of hot wings for everyone. That would keep us satisfied and was the perfect solution to avoid the impending battle over dish duty that could come at the end of the day, with everyone tired and dreading to fall into bed.

I was hoping Lia would come with me because that’s how it used to be.

She didn’t expect me to ask her to join me, of course, and she looked at me with wide eyes. She didn’t say anything for a while, and for a moment it felt as if everything around us was frozen. We were outside, the guys were looking at us, expectant to Lia’s answer. She bit her lip nervously. Any other time, I wouldn’t have had to ask. She would’ve just followed me like a happy rabbit, excited about the prospect of getting take-out food.

“There’s work to do,” she finally stated. The weight of responsibility in her words was genuine, but there was something else.

“Take a break. Come with me, please,” I implored, my tone carrying an unspoken plea. I wasn’t one to beg, but for her I would.

At least until I had it.

She didn’t say no. She must have noticed something in my voice or seen something in my eyes.

She followed me to the car and slipped into the passenger seat, avoiding my gaze.

The moment I put the engine on, we fell into an uncomfortable silence, Lia switched on the radio and immediately the car was flooded by Skylar Grey’s voice signing

“You're telling me to keep my hope Because you've got a heart of gold, But maybe you should let me go.”

Lia let it play for a few seconds, her fingers still on the radio. Then she switched to another station and sat back in the seat as if the whole thing had drained her.

The atmosphere was heavy with unsaid words, and after a minute, I broke the silence.

“You’ve lost weight.” I said. I avoided looking at her. I didn’t mean to make her uncomfortable. It was just a fact that worried me.

I was glad that her voice didn’t come back aggressive; defensive.

“I know,” she replied quietly. “It’s not that I’m not eating well. It’s… the medication, I guess. And the lack of sleep.”

I felt relieved that she was telling me all those things. I was scared that she would have closed herself and wouldn’t let me in again.

We looked at each other for a moment, and she returned the observation.

“You don’t look that good yourself.”

“Yeah. Lack of sleep, too.”

“We’re damned.”

We just fucking miss each other, I wanted to say.

“How did you stop coughing?” She asked, suddenly with more energy as she looked at me.

I shrugged. “I don’t know. Just like that. One day I was fucked up and the next one I wasn’t.” I took a turn and kept driving down the road. “Grandpa would have said that the Lord works in mysterious ways.”

“Sure as hell he does,” Lia faked a laugh. The memory of my grandpa’s sayings sparked a smirk on my lips.

I recalled how Lia, even as a child, dismissed the notion of supposedly divine intervention all the time. Whenever grandpa spoke of that Lord working in mysterious ways, Lia would attribute it so someone more tangible—a friend, a schoolmate, a neighbor, even—believing in the simplicity of human actions over divine orchestration.

The origins of this banter traced back to a childhood incident involving math homework. I, being particularly terrible at it, had given up one afternoon, declaring I’d face the consequences at school the next day. To my surprise, the homework miraculously appeared completed when I opened my notebook the following morning. When I shared the news with my grandparents, grandpa uttered his infamous line, and Lia, the cheeky girl who had quietly done my homework while I wasn’t looking, assured us it hadn’t been any lord working in strange ways.

I found myself smiling at the recollection and stole a glance at Lia’s face.

“But that proves I’m right.”

“What about?” I questioned, curious at her words.

“You don’t need me to get better.”

The conviction in her voice and the expression on her face erased the little smile from my face. I glanced back and forth from the road in front of me to Lia.

“You’re here, aren’t you?” I responded, a touch of defiance in my words, an attempt to prove her wrong.

“You can’t possibly keep thinking that,” Lia countered.

“Well, I do.” I declared, my voice carrying a mix of frustration and determination. “I was fucking sick on Monday, then Tuesday I was as good as new. Whatever this shit disease is, it knew you were coming back.”

She didn’t tell me then, (but she would later), that on Monday she’d had an appointment with her therapist, and she had made her realize something that she hadn’t accepted until later that night, and that was the reason I was fine the next day, and the reason why I never got sick ever again.

Grandma was right.

I attempted to steer the conversation towards a lighter note, given that Lia remained silent after my words.

“Well, what do you feel like eating?”

Her body sunk in the seat a little, and her head turned towards the window.

“I’ll be fine with a Go Cup of hot wings and wedges.”

“Alright.”

We reached the drive-thru at KFC after another five minutes, and we remained in silence all the while, only speaking to order the food, and then falling busy with our phones; our interaction reduced to the glow of our phones, which was a substitute for the warmth that had once existed between us.

It was making me sick; the silence grating on my nerves.

When I felt suffocated enough, I asked Lia if we could talk. She replied with a “no, please. Not now.”

I wondered if there would ever be a “right” moment or if patience was a virtue I could muster for much longer. I was surprised she was managing with such ease at this game she was playing, keeping her emotions at bay. It used to be so easy for her to tell me everything. Now that we had crossed the physical boundaries of our relationship, it seemed that an ocean had grown between our souls, the same ones that grandma kept on saying since forever that were tied together.

Everything was just a pile of bullshit.

A guy wearing a KFC cap and t-shirt handed over the carefully packed bags of food. With practiced routine, I passed them to Lia, offering the customary “be careful, it’s hot” as I navigated to secure the surplus in the back seats.

Once we had everything, I drove out from the place and headed back home, the smell of fried chicken filling the car. It hadn’t even been thirty seconds when I extended an arm and put my hand inside one of the bags in Lia’s lap to take out a wing, and what was once a routine action—her slapping my hand to tell me off for being impatient—was now a mere void. It didn’t happen. It was like she was scared to touch me, of what it meant if she did.

So, I took out the wing and ate it with her silence surrounding me, filling me. At least, when I was finished, she handed me a few tissues and I wrapped the bone in it to chuck it later.

Before reaching the house, I mentioned to her that I had talked to grandma and told her about her eagerness to see us again. I didn’t mention anything else about our phone conversation, but Lia probably knew that there had been some talk regarding what was going on… At the mention of grandma, Lia’s attitude shifted a bit, she seemed to come a bit more to life. The prospect of returning to Japan, Land of the Rising Sun, always brought an impossible-to-hide excitement to her. Lia loved Japan, the country’s culture, the people, but the root of it was in the love for grandma. They had a connection, and that understanding between her and grandma was one that Lia had never experienced with her own mother.

After the car trip and as we gathered in the kitchen and the garden to eat lunch, and then later as we went back to work, I couldn’t keep my eyes off her, and it was too obvious. At some point Jesse approached me and told me not to worry, that the touring and working would be good for her. Yet what truly eased my concerns a little was witnessing her interactions with the rest of the group. Among Folio’s stupid jokes and Jolly’s playful banter, Lia seemed to be her normal self. They were all there for her. She wasn’t alone.

However, there was still a raging conflict going on inside of me, even as the day unfolded and Lia and I seemed to be okay at moments, pretending to be the professionals we were.

Could it be possible that things would go back to normal? Could we be the best friends we had been, leaving behind the memory of our bodies intertwined in the sofa that night?

If she could, I was sure I couldn’t.

All I could think while I drove with her sat in the passenger seat was touching her, pulling her on my lap, kissing her, and fucking her right here in that right moment; how good that would feel, how good I’d make her feel…

There was no way I could go back to who we were.

#noah sebastian fic #bad omens fic #bad omens fanfic #noah sebastian x ofc #koi no yokan #noah sebastian

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vryivs · 2 years

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koi no yokan is a very simple fic

#fic notes #koi no yokan

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dalivanmagritte · 10 months

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NCT FIC REC : LEE JENO

back to the nct fic rec

Jeno fic rec part.2

lionheart (fav, smut, fluff, royal!au, knight!au, monarch!au)

premium boy-toy (fav, smut, stripper!au)

step on a crack, dr.lee's gonna break your back (fav, smut)

wanna know what it's like (fav, smut)

yours to tame (fav, fluff, smut, knight!au, princess!au, royal!au)

koi no yokan (fav, smut, abo!au)

slick pup (fav, pervert!au, smut)

prince of wolves (fav, smut, werewolf!au, vampire!au)

i suddenly realize my archnemesis is hot (fav,fluff, angstish, demigod!au, mythology!au)

pride & perjudice (fav, fluff, angst, smut)

secret (smut, fluff, sub!jeno (kink discovery))

my sunset is yours (fluff, hogwarts!au)

helping hand (fluff, hogwarts!au)

sweet lies (smut, angstish, ghost!jeno!au)

heatstroke (mechanic!au, smut)

transfiguration spell (smut, fluff, angstish, hogwarts!au)

sinking ships (smut, sailor!au, mermaid!au, horror!au)

tattooist!jeno (fluff, angst, tattooist!au, florist!au)

himbo (smut, himbo!jeno)

cute little intern (smut, ceo!au, intern!au)

mine only (smut)

possessive dad! (smut, pregnancy!au, soon to be parents!au)

ridin' club switching lanes (smut, streeracer!au)

sweet fury (smut)

rainfall (fluff)

the deal (fluff, college!au)

cigarettes after sex (fluff, angstish, suggestive, college!au)

just so you know x jaemin (smut)

change in you (smut, vampire!au, georgian-era!au)

puppy (smut, supernatural!au, werewolf!au)

sunshine (fluff, angst, mermen!jeno)

hit the breaks! (serie, smut, streetracer!au, mechanics!au)

rich purity (serie, smut, virgin!au)

the lucky one (fluff, angst, demigod!au, mythology!au)

son of morpheus (fluff, demigod!au, mythology!au)

son of apollo (fluff, demigod!au, mythology!au)

son of shadows (part of elysios serie, fluff, demigod!au, mythology!au)

the tale older than time (fluff, demigod!au, mythology!au)

late night company (fluff, comfort angst, demigod!au)

scream (smut (dirty smutt), halloween!au, ghostface!jeno)

possessive jeno (smut, roommate)

a different kind of exercise (smut, personal trainer!au)

the rock of gibraltar (smut)

jeno uses his strength against you (smut)

why dying my hair was the best decision of my life (fluff)

the bat & dove (smut, fluff, mafia!au, racer!jeno)

do you even know how to have fun? (angst to fluff, badboy!au)

take my breath (smut, abo!au)

puppy pound (smut, abo!au)

jealous (smut, abo!au)

sos x jaemin (smut, abo!au)

destiny (smut, abo!au)

i'm a mouse duh! x jaemin (smut)

they're roommates x jaemin (smut)

sos x jaemin (smut, abo!au)

stepbro alpha jeno (smut, abo!au, stepbro!au)

day6: overstimulation (smut)

day19: pet play (smut)

banana (smut)

guardian gloves (smut, angstish, boxer!au)

teddy bear (smut)

strong jeno (smut)

codename : monster (smut)

his order (smut, ceo!au)

sli(ck-p)up (smut, perv!jeno)

fireproof (smut, brotherbf!au, college!au)

size kink (smut)

only 'til dawn (smut, badboy!jeno, goodgirl!reader)

little wifey (smut, husband!au)

pretzel (smut, abo!au)

hard dom! (smut)

wrapped around your fingers (smut)

phone fuck me (smut, ghostface!au)

my first and last (smut, college!au)

the sequel x jaemin (smut, ghostface!au, halloween!au)

incubus!jeno (smut, incubus!au)

summer hair = forever young (smut, fluff)

cookie jar x jaemin (smut, stepbrother!au)

perv!jeno (smut, roommates!au, perv!au)

monster in hiding (smut, stalking!au)

can't take it? (smut)

can you handle it? x johnny, jaehyun, jaemin (smut)

ascention to the throne (serie, smut, royal!au, prince!au, political!au)

baby trapping (smut, sugardaddy!au)

shameless (smut, stepson!au)

undone (noncon, smut)

teddy bear -> our sick story, thus far x haechan (dubcon, smut)

stepbro!jeno part.2 (DUBCON, smut, stepbrother!au)

behind closed doors x haechan (smut, slight dubcon, stepbro!au)

the walls are thin x jaemin (DUBCON, smut)

shoplifter x mark (dubcon, smut, bodyguard!au, stepfather!au)

switch -> chain x johnny (dubcon, smut, neighbour?au)

arcade (continuation of switch/chain, smut)

#nct #jeno #smut #fic rec #fluff #lee jeno #jeno smut #jeno fluff #jeno angst #jeno scenarios #jeno imagines #jeno fic #nct jeno #jeno x reader #jeno oneshot #nct dream #nct fic #nct imagines #nct x reader

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dollsuguru · 4 months

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WIP LIST: SUGURU GETO. (VALENTINE’S DAY EDITION)

જ⁀➴ premonition of love (恋の予感)

♡ “there’s a japanese phrase that i like: koi no yokan. it doesn’t mean love at first sight. it’s closer to love at second sight. it’s the feeling when you meet someone that you’re going to fall in love with them. maybe you don’t love them right away, but it’s inevitable that you will.” - nicola yoon.

one day you go to meet your new best friend satoru at his apartment and end up coming face to face with his beautiful roommate - suguru geto. unbelievably enamored by his beauty & charm, you hope to get to know him better & develop a relationship. perhaps you two will become something more than acquaintances & just friends?

જ⁀➴ kanzashi

♡ you & suguru take a stroll in kyoto after a mission. while walking past stunning sakura trees & beautiful street stalls, you see a hairpin that reminds you of him and give it to him - it’s a token of your love that you hope he wears & carries with him always.

જ⁀➴ black is the color of my true love’s hair

♡ your devotion to suguru is second to none - you would do anything for your beloved! bonded by true love, loyalty, & utter admiration, these are a few moments where suguru has been unbelievably thankful for you & smitten by your acts of love & service!

જ⁀➴ starry-eyed

♡ in which tired 3rd year student suguru geto meets annoyingly adorable and extroverted 2nd year you. your upperclassman is someone you’ve always had a crush on so you try to get to know him better & ultimately end up worming your way into his heart!

he’s endlessly fond of you but he’d be lying if he said he didn’t want to kiss you senseless to make you shut up about how he should “consider condensing cursed balls and put them into boba” sometimes.

જ⁀➴ fangs & flirting

♡ as a recently turned vampire, you try and navigate vampirehood along with your human best friend suguru geto! eternity is a long time, but you think it’d be a manageable feat with someone like suguru by your side.

જ⁀➴ carmel-by-the-sea (snapshots) (fic series)

♡ the gang goes to a beautiful quaint town during the summer for a well-deserved vacation! you’re best friends with suguru, but you hope that you can become something more and take your friendship to the next level. this story will show snapshots of your blossoming relationship with the beautiful man you’ve crushed on since high school!

જ⁀➴ burning desire (s)

♡ renowned erotica novelist suguru geto needs some new inspiration. perhaps you can be his new muse?

#geto suguru x reader #getou suguru x reader #geto x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk x reader #i’ll try & get to these during the month of feb & beyond! wanted to try my hand at romantic stories so 🥰 hehe <3 wish me luck!#personal #snippets #my writings

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hp-bodiceripper · 9 months

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Bodice Ripper 2023: masterlist revealed

Reveals are here!

Thank you to all our wonderful participants for your skill and creativity. It's been a joy to host this fest for you again.

Thank you dear commenters, rebloggers, kudos givers, and enthusiastic supporters. We hope you feel properly romanced.

See you next year!

🖋 collarbones like a bow, skin an arrow to the heart by @lqtraintracks (Pansy Parkinson/Ginny Weasley, E, 4k)

Gin’s adjusting the lighting for their next shoot when in walks the new model Luna was so enthusiastic about, and that’s when they know they’re in deep shit.

🖋 Cool About It by @oflights (Harry Potter/Draco Malfoy, M, 16k)

Harry is so excited for his first date with Draco. But what follows isn't so much a date as it is an all-night odyssey including a malevolent lift, a Gringotts heist, a Sleeping Curse, a trip to the kebab shop, a lack of dancing, a Muggle drug, a rooftop pool party, a black eye and, eventually, a sunrise over a Quidditch stadium.

🖋 Love Me Meow by apricitydays (Arabella Fig/Minerva McGonagall, E, 2.5k)

After the students leave for the summer, Headmaster McGonagall and the new Muggle Studies professor have a chance and sensuous encounter at the beach.

🖋 Nature pricks them on to ramp and rage by @goblinmatriarch (Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter, E, 21k)

Lord Draco Malfoy may be a young man spending time in Dumbledore’s summer court, but that does not mean he needs to succumb to its licentious frivolity. He carries the burden of his lineage, the shadow of rumours, and the dignity of his betrothal to a good match. He is certainly not fool enough to be distracted by the dark curls and ready grin of the court’s stableboy, who seems to have taken up with every courtier who looks his way.

🖋 The Real Thing by @skeptiquewrites (Harry Potter/Draco Malfoy, M, 5k)

Harry only means to cheer Draco up after a terrible breakup. He doesn't mean to fall in love.

🖋 this is how we become timeless by @evadwrites (Narcissa Malfoy/Lily Evans, T, 10k)

Narcissa is in eternal servitude to the Dark Lord, bound by the tears of a burned-down phoenix. Lily belongs to the Order, bound by the tears of the same creature. They’re the only two people in the world in the position of time turners, tasked with teetering the outcome of the ongoing war into their respective side’s favor. They are light years away, yet they’ve never been closer.

🖋 Wild Horses (couldn't drag me away) by @purplehotmess (Harry Potter/Draco Malfoy, E, 36k)

Koi no Yokan (Japanese) - The feeling of excitement you get when you first meet someone and know that you will eventually fall in love with them. A more realistic version of ‘love at first sight’, it roughly translates to ‘premonition of love’. A story of magic, horses, magical horses, and two men who fight all odds to find their way to each other.

🖋 Yesterday by suhtmuikkis (Harry Potter/Draco Malfoy, T, 10k)

Harry doesn’t intentionally kidnap Draco Malfoy. Really it’s debatable if you can even call it kidnapping but the git surely seems to think so.

🎨 Harry And Draco Wearing Kilts by @ladderofyears (Harry Potter/Draco Malfoy, G, digital art)

Our favourite wizards, dressed in traditional Scottish attire.

🎨 I Bloom Pink For You by @crazybutgood (Narcissa Malfoy/Pansy Parkinson, M, craft)

Pansy has been starved for love her whole life. All she needs is someone who will give her the approval she craves. An origami comic inspired by Schmem_14's fic.

🎨 Joy Exposed by @getawayfox (Fleur Delacour/Ginny Weasley, G, Digital art)

Ginny and Fleur give an interview for Daily Prophet’s new Weekend Magazine and spend hours doing an accompanying photoshoot. When it comes to approving the selection of photos for print, they unanimously choose the candid one taken on their break, rather than all the styled and posed images.

🎨 Monday Murder Club by @vitaminpops (Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter, Lavender Brown/Padma Patil, T, Digital art)

The members of a crime-solving club find love and friendship amidst the blood.

🎨 The Professor's Passion by @digthewriter (Narcissa Black Malfoy/Hermione Granger, G, Digital art)

Hermione is a professor and Gryffindor head of house. She loves her job... until Narcissa Malfoy is hired on the school's faculty, and is now head of Slytherin. God, that woman is insufferable. Hermione despises her so much she can hardly think about anything else. (She must hate her... that's why she always feels so hot and bothered when she's around, right? And does she have to be so damn beautiful?)

🎨 You Pierce My Soul by @reliand (Harry Potter/Draco Malfoy, M, digital art)

Harry's eyes were on him almost as soon as Draco entered the ballroom. It was as if he'd been watching the door, and now Harry's eyes were wide and his mouth open.

🎵 Masks Off by @roseszain (Harry Potter/Draco Malfoy, Teen, 3h 15 min)

Draco had followed his parents to this Caribbean island as a matter of course, even though no one had told him what they were doing here or why his father’s ships were frequently attacked by masked pirates. And, honestly, Draco’d had no intention of actually finding out either.

🎵 wasps and honey by swoons by cailynwrites (Hermione Granger/Narcissa Malfoy, M, 1 - 1,5 hours)

After ten years on parole in the Muggle world, newly widowed Narcissa Black is finally allowed to do magic again — as long as she can complete all the spells on the Ministry course list. Her Ministry of Magic representative? Hermione Granger.

#hpbodiceripper2023 #masterlist #mod post #drarry #hp femslash #hp wlw #hpbodiceripper #hp podfic #hp fanart

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desceros · 4 months

Note

Hey, not sure if this is a weird thing to send, but I wanted to pass along some Rise!Leo x reader fic recs for any of your heartbroken readers in need of compensation! A lot of them are still ongoing and may not have been updated recently but I don’t think they’re abandoned. And even what’s there is really enjoyable as is!

“Worth the Wait” by morning_sun (a lot of fluff and smut, very cute one-shot)

“A Romantic Comedy, Starring Leonardo Splinterson” by morning_sun (Leo helps a stranger give birth and then helps her raise the baby, very cute)

“Koi No Yokan” by Catttoo (The_best_fangirl997) (hasn’t updated in a while, but a very good read; unique villain, enjoyable relationship buildup, good smut, fuckboy Leo finally getting his shit together; does delve into heavier topics but the romance is still the point)

“Quick Sketch” by Landsel (very cute, Leo is going through it with the PTSD, lots of smut, non-explicit illustrations included; does delve into heavier topics but the romance is still the point)

“Road Work Ahead? I Sure Hope It Does” by darn_eggs (my fav, one of the first ROTTMNT fics I read, I love it and the way eggs uses the lore of the show and explores it, SO MANY PUNS, very cute, updated recently, not nearly as heavy as some of the others out there which is also really nice as a break from the post-movie trauma)

There are definitely others but I either don’t remember them off the top of my head (all of these were in the bookmarks on my phone) or they’re much heavier/darker and may not be the best recs for people wanting a happy Leo relationship. But yeah, these recs are for all the Rise!Leo fans who feel personally victimized by desceros!

i'll never be sorry

i can confirm that i enjoyed 'worth the wait' a lot! and i started reading 'quick sketch' and liked it quite a bit, but got distracted and haven't made it back to it yet (typical), so i can't speak past the first few chapters or so. and i'm friends with eggs and i know gb (whose taste i trust implicitly) likes it, so i'll just slap a rec sticker on that one too! i can't speak to the others personally but i'm all for throwing recs out! :D

#ask tag #'raise your hand if you've been personally victimized by desceros having leo as a fav character'

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drarryspecificrecsdaily · 10 months

Text

2023.08.02

Complete fics posted on AO3 this day

1. "I Object," he said by Sowl_Walker [G, 6k]

►when Harry's longing to hear his beloved's voice one last time before he was promised to someone else manifested itself against all odds.

2. The Pieces of Me by HP_fanfics17 [G, 1k]

►Embark on a captivating journey of resilience and love as Harry battles his disorder, guided by Draco. A story of healing, acceptance, and finding oneself amidst chaos.

---

Fest/Exchange

1. Lover, Where Do You Live? by Anonymous [E, 38k]

►Harry Potter has been running away since the War, disappearing into his job as a freelance curse-breaker. Work is his life. Home doesn't exist. He's about to disappear again when he runs into Death Eater-turned-Healer Draco Malfoy. It's supposed to be a one-night-stand. They're not supposed to pine for each other. Harry's not supposed to sleep with Draco a second time. Or a third. Or a fourth. But when a nasty curse sends Harry back into Draco's arms, he might be forced to admit that home's been waiting for him all along... ★ HD Wireless 2023 | @hd-wireless

2. Wild Horses (couldn't drag me away) by Anonymous [E, 35k]

►Koi no Yokan (Japanese) - The feeling of excitement you get when you first meet someone and know that you will eventually fall in love with them. A more realistic version of ‘love at first sight’, it roughly translates to ‘premonition of love’. [...] ★ HP Bodice Ripper Fest 2023 | @hp-bodiceripper

#drarry #drarry fanfic #drarry fic rec #harry potter #draco malfoy #daily list #2023 #2023.08

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akiology · 9 months

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Koi no Yokan || Yusuke Kitagawa x Reader

Word Count: 569 Note: have a short yusuke fic ive been ruminating about :D

Sometimes Yusuke thinks that this is not your first lifetime together. When you first met him, there was a sense of familiarity, as if you've known eachother even way before you met. It was as if suddenly, everything fell into place. He knew then that you were going to be someone important in his life.

He quickly memorized your little gestures and tells. He knows when you are raring to tell him something, whether it is about your day or one of your interests, and he gladly listens. He knows when you need a hug, or when you need space. He knows it all. He knows you.

And you, in return, know him. You know about his past and accepted him. You know about his every day struggles. You did not judge him for his eccentric qualities, instead you kept up with him. You were patient with him, even when he was hyperfocused on his craft. He never hid even a part of himself from you. You know everything there is to know about him.

Whenever you are tangled together, Yusuke thinks of how perfectly your bodies fit. As if you were made for eachother, like you were each other's missing pieces. Perhaps you were both once whole, but then the gods were afraid of your power and split you two together. He likes that idea. He always find himself searching, looking, for something. But he never knew what it was. Then, he saw you.

Maybe he was right; this isn't your first lifetime together. Your souls could have possibly met each other a millennia ago. Or if the multiverse theory is real, and that the black holes in space leads to a new world, perhaps in another universe you found each other again.

How poetic, in the grand scheme of things, two souls were forever linked together bound to always find each other in every life. And even with just one 'hello', they knew. They knew they were and will always be important to each other for the longest time.

"Darling, what are you up to?"

"Yusuke! I am currently making dinner for you! I noticed you were knee-deep in your thoughts so I did not want to interrupt."

"Apologies, darling. I am currently in what they call, a rut. My head and my hand are currently not cooperating."

"I'm sorry to hear that, maybe you'd like to eat first?"

"That may be just what I need."

Yusuke cannot imagine a life without you anymore; he partly believes he does not have to. He has an inkling, that even no matter what happens, you will find your way to him.

But then, he thinks, there might be a version of himself that chose a different path, made different choices... What if a version of himself went to a different school and ends up not meeting you? Or perhaps you did. What if a version of yourself ends up being late one Monday morning, and you met someone while waiting for the train to come?

And Yusuke was left to wait for a you that will never come.

His heart aches, breaks, for those lifetimes.

But it's not in this lifetime, and he is thankful. Because right now, you are in front of him. He pulled you close to him, and gave you a quick kiss.

"I love you, darling," he whispers softly. "In this lifetime, and the next."

#persona x reader #yusuke kitagawa #yusuke kitagawa x reader #fanfic #yusuke x reader #fluff #reader insert #persona 5

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acherontiarchivist · 1 year

Text

Status Update: Koi No Yokan

Ok everyone, progress report is Koi No Yokan will soon be leaving hiatus. I have given a lot of thought about where I want it to go from here, and honestly I am dying to get the plot I had planned out for it really rolling. At first I wanted to take more time with the slowburn romance, but more than pining I want to cultivate the feeling of fear and anxiety. Yes, there will still be romance, obviously, and lots of smut! But fear has been a driving force with me creatively lately, and I am dying to get that ball rolling more with the plot that i have planted the seeds for, and also so I can move on to other fic ideas. (I have plans for a gabirel fic and a danny johnson fic in the works). There is an end in sight for koi no yokan, but fear not, it is not near, only hovering the horizon. I haven't completely figured out how exactly I want to end it yet. It could go two ways– a good end, fuzzy and romantic and comforting, and a bad end, with loss and tragedy and fear of what is to come. I'm honestly leaning towards the bad end, but that's where the readers come in (that's you)! As it stands I have seven chapters outlined and more to go, and a few chapters partially written. I'm not quite sure how many chapters are left truthfully, if I had to hazard a guess I'd say 10-15, including the chapters I've outlined.

As a thanks for waiting so long, I'll post a little teaser from the next chapter under the cut

(Also, sorry for the long post)

Two glasses of ginger ale sit patiently on the table, collecting condensation. You try not to sweat as much, nervously biting at your nails, wondering how to best bring up the night you came home naturally. Sure, he was occupied for a few days riding a wave of inspiration, you've been there, you could understand that. But was he really? Could that just have been an excuse? He is certainly taking a long time to bring over a few sketches and paintings. Maybe he didn't really have anything to show for his excuse.

A bead of water drips down the glass and collects onto the wooden coaster, captivating your vacant stare. Steady, rapid klinks begin to overlay the fizzy bubbles of the drinks. You worry that Selina's message on her business card pressured him to move more quickly than he was ready for. Was he really going to confess his feelings for you that night, or did he dig himself into a hole and spend the last three days hiding from the mess he made? Either way, you just want to make things right. You can't keep fighting the heavy weight bearing down on your chest, the sense of guilt that has shackled your ankles since he left your house in a hurry with a slam of your front door. God, why do you always do this? You're catastrophizing again, you worry yourself too much. Maybe it's a habit picked up from the constant paranoia that plagued your not so distant past.

Keys release the deadbolt, knocking you out of your spiral just in time. Vincent peers around the door carrying a large, aged leather portfolio. You dart your hand away from your mouth and sit on them both to avoid the scolding for picking up that nervous habit again. "Hi, Vinny," you smile, trying not to look too perturbed.

He approaches your side and places the portfolio flat on the table. When he gets situated on the couch, he places one hand on your knee, steadying your bouncing leg and ceasing the hypnotic klinking noise. How long have you been bouncing your leg?

"Sorry," you look down to the floor out of disappointment in yourself. His thumb rubs your knee as a soothing gesture and you fight back a blush. "So, you gonna open this baby up or what?" You try to sound more chipper and meet his stare with a lopsided smile, letting your hair fall over your face slightly.

Vincent hesitates momentarily before nodding and leaning over to gingerly untie the bound leather. He takes in a heavy breath to brave himself for what he has no doubt is the serious embarrassment and rejection to come, then almost half heartedly flips the top wing of the portfolio over to reveal the sketches and paintings he had spilled his heart into underneath. The couch creaks under his weight as he retreats back into the couch and releases a breath he didn't know he was holding onto. His hand reaches out to grab your own, but goes unnoticed as you sink to the floor on your knees.

You can't believe what you see spread out on the table before you. Countless loose sketch papers spill from the portfolio, pushed to the floor and falling in your lap as you grab each one and examine it briefly before taking in the next. You. They're all you. Some you can tell are drawn from memories the two of you share– you at the dinner table, laughing with Bo and Lester, you celebrating your miraculous win at a game of pool, you cooking breakfast in the Sinclair's kitchen. Shaky breaths fight to enter your lungs, all the while your chest rising sporadically.

Composure threatens to slip your grasp. Finally, you try to neatly gather them and set them aside from the oil painting that laid beneath the piles of paper. A woman stands in a dark forest, the full moon a halo behind her head. She holds antlers on top of her head and three wolves lay by her feet. This, you realize, is you as well. Your back meets the couch as you try to process it all. All of the words slip your mind, as if you've suddenly forgotten to speak English. You open your mouth to say something, anything, but nothing escapes the void.

Vincent can hear his own heart beating in the silence of the room, threatening to deafen him, even drive him mad. He can't take it, he knows what's coming. His leg twitches as he decides to get up, leave and run away, to never turn back, to lock himself away in his safe place and never see the light of day again. But something happens, something he didn't quite expect.

As soon as you feel him move, your hand almost instinctively meets his knee as if to freeze him to the spot. Now the only sounds occupying the space are his wavering breaths hitting cold wax and the loud pulse that you could no longer tell whether it was his or your own. For the first time in a long time, Vincent finds himself fighting back tears. You swear you could almost hear him whimpering as you pull yourself onto the couch, sitting on your knees and facing him. "Vincent," you whisper and stare at the rise and fall of his chest, unable to make eye contact, still trying to work up the courage.

"Vincent, the other night, I thought I–" you take a deep breath and look him in the eye, "I thought I really fucked up. I thought I had pushed you to– I don't know, rush things I guess?"

He looks at you, unmoving, waiting. You shake your head and look at your hands, picking at a hangnail. "Fuck, I guess I still could be jumping the gun here," you laugh nervously. "Vinny, I just have to hear it from you, okay? Before you run away and hide again and avoid me and leave me a nervous wreck. Please, just tell me if I'm reading into this too much," you gesture to the pages littering your living room. No response from him still, only his grip tightening on the arm of the couch, threatening to rip the upholstery.

"I need to know you want me, too." It comes out as a whisper, tailed by a halted gasp that slips past his lips. Time stops for just a moment between you two, no movement, not a sound. You almost admit defeat and begin to nod your head and turn away, but a strong, calloused hand meets the side of your face and returns it to its previous position, now met with the smooth texture of his mask pressing against your skin. His right arm snakes around you to hold you steady against his chest by the back of the neck, sending Shivers down your spine. His grasp is firm, but not rough, you feel his other arm moving outside of your periphery, then you hear a clatter on the end table directly behind you. You close your eyes, partially because you know that's what he would want and partially as a reaction from his hot breath meeting the bare skin of your neck. His lips ghost your ear and you swear you can almost hear some semblance of 'want you' in his breath before he pulls back to kiss you once again.

#vincent sinclair x reader #vincent sinclair #house of wax (2005)#slasher fucker #slasher x reader #koi no yokan fic #post content

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veronicaphoenix · 5 months

Text

This chapter contains a heavy scene involving substance abuse. Reader discretion is strongly advised. | Word count: 4.6k | Cross posted on AO3.| Series masterpost. ✧.*

If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health & their well-being, you are not alone and there is always someone willing to listen and help. Reach out and keep fighting. There's always a light at the end of the tunnel.

Fans crowded against the fences outside. I had been hearing them from inside for a while, sort of oblivious because all that was in my head was Lia’s broken voice telling me she was in love with me.

I stayed in for a while, maybe ten minutes, maybe thirty, wrapping my head around the news.

From the outside, things appeared to be business as usual. We had kicked off the tour with sold-out shows and the audiences were phenomenal. It was the dream we’d all had since we were kids come true. With all that euphoria and pride we were rejoicing in, nobody would have guessed what was going on behind closed doors.

Jolly and the two Nick’s had gone out minutes earlier to sign some autographs and take pictures. I had been in the green room.

After Lia left, I’d been left alone and paralyzed, processing her words as they replayed over and over in my head.

As I let myself out, some fans shrieked, and I heard the typical screams of surprise. I didn’t feel like being there, doing that, but it was part of my job and my commitment to the fans, and it didn’t matter that I felt like shit about the way things were with Lia, at the fact that I wasn’t in the green room with her wrapped around me. Despite everything, the fans had waited and welcomed me in a good mood.

Nearly ten minutes after I busied myself with signatures and pictures, we saw each other again.

Lia came out through another door, distances from the bustling crowd, cigarette in hand, and when she heard the shouts of the fans calling my name, she turned her head in my direction. We exchanged glances, the kind that said so much. There was longing in her eyes, sadness, and fear. The chill of the night accompanied our silent appraisal. It wasn’t just the physical space separating us, but the emotional ravines carved by the bridges we had burnt along the way. She took a drag, and she looked away as she opened her mouth to let the smoke out, keeping her melancholy hid inside, caged in the chambers of her heart.

This was, by far, Lia’s worst year.

She had lost her childhood to a negligent mother, and her idea of real love had been shattered at the hands of an abusive boyfriend. She had sought refuge in our friendship, and we, scarred as we were, inadvertently allowed ourselves to be vulnerable, to be… raw and unshielded with each other. And we had ruined the only stable anchor we had clung to for most of our lives.

As the clock edged closer to midnight later that night and everyone gathered in the bar in the ground floor of the hotel, it was difficult to believe that the night would turn into the longest one of our lives.

We had been drawn together towards the glowing ambience of the hotel bar after we had changed and cleaned up after our return from the show’s venue. I didn’t want to be there. I had aimed towards the elevator as soon as we entered the hotel lobby, but Nicholas, always aware of what to say to get me to give in, had convinced me to follow him and the others.

I sat down in a stool by the counter, uninterested in whatever was going on around me. I ordered a beer and didn’t even pay attention to the conversation initiated by Bryan and Matt next to me. Nevertheless, despite the melancholy I was carrying, I refrained from casting shadows over the rest of the group. I minded my own business and let them enjoy the night. Even Lia was tucked away in some corner, trying to get caught in the energy that permeated the air.

I was swallowing the last gulp of the second beer of the night when Nicholas decided to give me some of his time. I was leaning over the counter, engrossed in the hypnotic dance of the vanishing foam at the base of the beer glass.

Nick patted me on the back.

“I know you’re upset about Lia,” he said in a low voice, making sure that the words stayed between us. “But Noah, I think it’s time you move on,” his voice cut through the bar's symphony, the clinking of glasses and the distant laughs. “We’re all trying to help her. What happened between you both will pass. You can’t drown yourself in your sorrow just because she doesn’t lo—”

“She does,” I interjected, interrupting his well-intentioned counsel. “Earlier. We talked. She told me she’s in love with me.”

Nicholas furrowed his brows and glanced behind me, as if trying to make sense of what I just told him.

“I don’t understand,” he replied.

“She’s scared,” I continued, my gaze fixed on the glass cradled in one of my hands. “I’d be too, with her past. Everyone that was supposed to love her didn’t. That’s why she’s so apprehensive about us being together, I guess.”

Nick didn’t need to tell me anything regarding that. I knew he understood. Despite of it, he pressed for more details. “Did you tell her that you...?”

“I wasn’t very specific, I think,” I confessed, my words hanging in the ambient buzz of the bar and the stupid music playing in the background. “But she’s stubborn as fuck, and she won’t let us give it a chance.”

“That’s just... Noah, I seriously don’t understand.”

“What is it so hard to understand?” That’s when I raised my voiced and finally looked at him. The exasperation inside of me was reaching its limits, with everything and everyone. “Love is fucking complicated, man. I wish someone would have told me this when I was seven years old and I saw her by herself on the sidewalk, pulling at the grass growing from the fucking concrete. Maybe I would have done things differently.”

That have been a recurring thought in my head the last weeks. Did I regret every twist and turn that had brought Lia and me here, to this point? I couldn’t see a future for us. I could imagine it, I could imagine how it would be to have her all to myself, to pursue our dreams, create a family, maybe, grow old together. But I couldn’t really see it happening. My mind was an intricate maze of conflicting emotions that remained in disarray. Not even my therapist knew how to sort me out. I needed something to happen to give me clarity, for I was losing my fucking mind. I just never in a million years would have expected it to be what was about to come in less than an hour.

“I’m talking about her flirting with that woman on the other side of the bar.”

What?

I swiveled on the stool, my eyes scanning the crowded expanse of the bar. Lia stood near a wall. Beside her, a woman probably a few years older than her, with black hair and piercing blue eyes, scrutinized Lia with a gaze filled with desire. The worst part? Lia reciprocated. A surge of fiery fire ignited within me, and I was moving towards her in a second.

No, she wasn’t allowed to do this to me. Not anymore.

I pushed past a few people on the way, earning discontented murmurs and yells from the crowd.

Lia’s laugh echoed in my ears as I reached her.

“Excuse me,” I said, redirecting the older woman’s attention with a polite yet firm tone. Lia was taken aback by my intrusion into the scene and pivoted to meet my gaze. “I need you.” I declared with an unspoken plea in my eyes.

It was the other woman who replied, as Lia didn’t expect me to interrupt whatever was going on there and was startled by my presence.

“Hello,” the woman greeted. She was taller than she looked from the bar counter, and her accent was definitely not American. “Who are you?”

“Noah,” I replied, a note of possessiveness seeping into my tone, and then, “the one she’s in love with, so if you don’t mind, I need her.”

I touched Lia’s elbow, ready to pull her with me far away from that stranger, who was registering my assertion with raised eyebrows and an air of disbelief. She directed her blue scrutiny toward Lia. It just took her one look at Lia to know I wasn’t lying.

“Are you?” She asked Lia, punctuating the question with a discerning gaze.

So much for a fun flirt, isn’t it, Lia?

Lia just stood there with her lips parted and cheeks flushed. She looked at me once, and I waited to see if she would lie.

She didn’t. The woman cast her an awry expression, a blend of disappointment and anger. She grabbed a glass with some cocktail from a wall rack not far and retreated into the crowd, shaking her head. Lia and I followed her a few seconds until we turned to each other.

“How dare you?” She exclaimed.

As I looked deep into her eyes, I felt a small relief at the knowledge that she wasn’t drunk, but that only fueled my anger at the fact that she had engaged in that flirtation on purpose.

“How dare you?!” I repeated, my words a torrent of incredulity and frustration. “You tell me that you love me and two hours later you’re here flirting with a stranger? What game are you playing? This is not you.”

“I’m not playing any game,” Lia protested, swallowing at the mention of her feelings. “I’m just… trying to forget.”

“And is it working?” I wondered out loud. “Because I tried it, and it definitely doesn’t for me.”

She didn’t say anything. She remained silent, her eyes scanning mine, trying to see what was there. Then she let her head fall, giving up.

“Can you let it be, please?” It was a soft plea. She didn’t know where to look.

“No, I don’t let it be. We’ve been there for each other since forever. Months ago, everything that happened to you was my business, if not, check the calls you were making. I understand that you’re hurt, that you’re still coping with what that motherfucker did to you, and then we…”

“No. Please, no.”

“Lia,” I grabbed one of her hands and squeezed her fingers. “Are you really going to deny yourself everything you feel and repress it with alcohol and those drugs prescribed by your therapist? Look, I know you’re scared. I am, too, but the idea of not having you in my life terrifies me more,” I confessed, desperation lacing my words.

“You still have me,” she whispered, big wide eyes looking back up at me. “Even if we’re not who we used to be.”

“That’s now how I want it,” I replied to her. “And not how you want it, either. Aren’t you tired of fighting it? Of pretending? Because I am. I’m tired of pretending that I’m okay with this, that I don’t miss you, that I don’t crave you.” The last words came out as a growl that I hadn’t intended.

“Noah, stop.”

“No, Lia. I can’t stop. I can’t stop thinking about you. I can’t stop thinking about how good it felt to slide between your legs and sink myself deep inside of you. I can’t get your little moans and the way you said my name in that raspy voice out of my head. And I know that you can’t either. You can’t keep fooling me. And I wish to fuck that you would stop being scared and let me k—.”

She cut me off by grabbing a fistful of my shirt and slamming her mouth on mine.

I threw away all logical thought. I grabbed her face in my palms and let all my senses focus on her.

She kissed me with urgency, with such desperation that I could feel her pain, for it mirrored mine. It made me nearly lose my mind the way she put her soul into the kiss, her little sounds telling me how much she had fought this, and how tired she was now. She surrendered to the moment.

Her left hand still gripped my shirt, anchoring herself, while the other was pressed against my stomach. I felt her getting on her tiptoes, and I sunk myself deeper into the kiss, tilting my head to the side so that I’d have better access to her mouth. I had wanted this for so long. My thumb caressed her cheek, wanting to memorize the feeling of her skin beneath my touch.

Time stood still for as long as our kiss lasted, the world around melting away. Every doubt and fear harbored melted away in the warmth of it, or so I thought. I felt courageous, like I finally had her, like I finally had put some sense into her with my words and she was finally ready to accept that we were made for each other and that there was a future waiting for us.

I pushed her back towards the wall. When her body pressed against it, my body sought hers, her embrace, her scent, her familiarity. Lia was home.

I covered her not only with my mouth but with every inch of my body. I was dying to be back in the comfort of a house, wrapped in her arms, just the two of us and the sounds we stole from each other.

The kiss moved to a cautious, slow pace. Every sensation of her taste and warmth enveloped my senses, consuming me entirely. In that moment, she became my world—everything I could feel, hear, smell, and touch. I was lying. She had been my entire world for as long as I could remember.

The moment I started to feel her grip on my t-shirt beginning to loosen was the same moment I felt the coldness of her tears touching my face. Despite the gentle dance of our mouths, her movements had gone still. Something was off.

Reluctantly, I pulled back and opened my eyes. Lia’s tears traced a path down her cheeks, leaving a glistening trail under the lights in the room. Her lips, still swollen and wet, carried a light tremble, and her eyes were shiny in the dark, but watery all the same.

“Hey,” I whispered. I moved back and bent down a little to look her straight in the face. My thumbs wiped away the tears staining her cheeks with tender strokes. She closed her eyes and sniffled, and I felt her begin to surrender again to my touch, but a second later she shook her head so lightly that I wasn’t sure if I saw it.

“I can’t, Noah.”

What I would have given to enter her mind, delve into her thoughts, fight whatever was there that was telling her that this was wrong, that this was an unnecessary risk, that we were meant to be doomed.

Helplessness washed over me; I didn’t have the key to free her from every single thing that had twisted in her past. I remembered that night many years ago, when she came to my bed because she had had a nightmare. She told me her mother had assured her that she would drown, that no one would be there to hold her hand.

I reached out to her and gently clasped her wrist. She stopped for a second. Her other hand touched my hand, her fingers grazing the skin on the back of it, then she pried herself open and walked away.

An hour later, I was still sitting in the same stool where I had started the night, gulping down another beer. I wasn’t drunk. Far from it. Maybe it was that I was too aware of what was going on that alcohol couldn’t affect me anymore, and I hated it for it. It wasn’t my intention either to get drunk and forget. I had just been standing in front of Lia merely fifty minutes ago telling her exactly not to do that. I wanted to feel everything. I was just drinking for the sake of doing something instead of screaming and banging my head against a wall.

I was about to order a glass of whiskey on the rocks even before I finished my beer when my phone started buzzing in the pocket of my jeans, and my heart skipped a beat when I saw Lia’s name on the screen. However, I didn’t sound any excited when I answered the call.

I heard a sniff coming from the other side.

“Noah… I’m sorry…”

“I know,” I replied wearily. I couldn’t hide my exhaustion, how drained I was. “It’s fine.”

It wasn’t. It was far from fine but I didn’t have it in me to say anything else. I was tired. I took another gulp of beer, hoping to find solace at the bottom of the glass.

“I’m…” Lia began, her words hanging in the air.

“It’s ok,” I said before she continued. “You don’t have to say anything else.”

There was a moment of silence.

“But… Noah, I’m…” Her voice wavered. I could tell she was struggling. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t want… I think— I think I… I need help.”

That’s when my alarms went off. The urgency, the desperation in her plea was far from right. That was an honest ask for help, and that wasn’t usual from her. I straightened up on the stool.

“Are you alright?”

“Please, help me.” She was about to cry, and I had never heard her so scared, not even when I discovered that Mitch had been abusing her and I insisted that she leave his house and came home with me.

“Lia, what’s going on?”

A few steps from me, Jolly and Nicholas heard my concerned voice amidst the music and spotted the worried lines crossing my face.

“I was scared and I took…” I heard Lia swallowing hard on the other side of the line. “I took… I don’t feel good. Please, can you come?”

As her voice faded away, my heartbeat sped up.

“Lia, where are you?” By the time I asked the question, I was already on my feet.

“Room,” her voice was a mere whisper that I would’ve had trouble deciphering if it wasn’t for the obviousness of her location.

“Okay. I’m coming right now. Can you tell me what you took?”

She didn’t need to tell me. I could make out a rough idea, and it terrified me. The image of that little medication bag she kept with her, full of pills and other substances, came to my mind and a knot formed in the pit of my stomach.

“Noah…”

“Yes. I’m here. What is it? Lia, you have to tell to me.”

“I’m…” Her voice grew drowse. She sounded sleepy. She was drifting away.

“Lia. Lia, hey. Hey! Stay with me. I’m coming.”

I motioned urgently for Jolly to follow, patting him on the back. Folio and Nick, sensing the urgency, joined us. As we hurried through the reception hall, Jolly called out to me just as I was about to jump up the stairs, opting to fuck the slow elevators.

“Do you have a key to Lia’s room?” He asked.

“No.”

Panic gripped me.

Fuck.

Jolly rushed to the reception and asked for a key. The woman behind the counter, a young girl full of make up and hair all pinned up, told him she was not allowed to do so. Jolly and Nick told her Lia was with us, that she was part of the band’s crew, she was our friend, our family. This was an emergency. The lady kept on rambling bureocratic bullshit until Iapproached her, frustration boiling over, and screamed at her to give me the fucking keys.

It must have been my expression which spoke louder than the volume of the order, because she complied and handed me a copy of Lia’s room’s key with a shaky hand.

I put the phone back to my ear.

“Lia, are you there? Can you hear me?”

All I could hear was a disconcerting white noise, then a sound that I recognized as a phone falling on the carpeted floor of the hotel room.

“Lia!”

Each word echoed through the narrow hallway as I ascended the stairs with hurried, long strides. The resonance of our footsteps was a backdrop to the relentless pounding of my heart against the cage of my chest.

I reached Lia’s hotel room and unlocked the door with the cardkey. The scene before me sent a shockwave through my senses.

She was on the floor, laying by the side of the bed.

My legs carried me to her side, and I fell to my knees. I scooped her up in my arms, cradling her fragile form and calling her name. With trembling fingers, I brushed aside the strands of hair obscuring her face. Her eyes were closed, and she was so pale.

The boys were talking behind me, saying something while doing an effort to maintain their composure, too, but the overwhelming emotions threatened to engulf us all.

My gaze fell upon the empty blisters scattered on the bedside table and strewn across the floor. The reality of the situation pierced through the haze of fear and shock, and it was then that I became acutely aware of my own tears, silently streaming down my face in tandem with the tumult of emotions that surged within me.

I told Jolly to call an ambulance, ignorant to the fact that he had already done so. Nicholas was slumped against a wall, looking at Lia in my arms, and Folio was standing by the door, holding his head with his hands.

“Lia,” I gently shook her, praying for her to wake up. “Lia, baby. I’m here. Stay with me, yeah?”

I clung to her, cradling her form against my chest. The fear of losing her tightened its grip on my soul. I wouldn’t let her go.

“Noah?” Her voice, feeble, made my heart take a halt. Hearing my name coming from her lips brought a smile to my face despite the tears that still flowed down. A bittersweet relief washed over me as her brown eyes struggled to focus on my face.

Lia blinked a few times, confused, disoriented.

“Hey, beautiful. Hey. I’m here. I told you I would come, didn’t I?”

“Noah, I’m sorry,” she said, her trembling lips betraying her.

“Shh. It’s okay. It’s gonna be fine. We’re gonna be fine, I promise.” Leaning in, I pressed a gentle kiss to her sweat-drenched forehead.

“I…” Her words faltered, and I sensed another wave of pain pulling us down.

Panic took over me again as I saw her slipping away. I shook her frail body.

“Hey. Hey, stay awake, don’t fall asleep,” I urged, swallowing my own tears and the lump in my throat. “Stay with me. Can you tell me how many of those did you take?”

“I don’t…” Her voice trailed off, darkness threatening to take her.

“No, no falling asleep, Lia. Keep your eyes open, please. Please, Lia.”

As the seconds ticked by, she was gripped by muscle spasms that turned into convulsions. Her eyes shut; her body went limp in my arms. Terror froze me momentarily. When I saw the foam coming out of her mouth my paralysis was shattered.

I screamed her name, the echoes reverberating through the room, a guttural cry for help directed at Jolly, Nicholas, and Nick, at whoever was in the hallway that could help us.

My world felt apart as I clutched Lia in my arms, realizing, as time slowed down, that I was losing her. I was suddenly in a suffocating prison, trapped in a nightmare. She was slipping away like grains of glittering sand through my trembling fingers. I was seized by desperation, clawing at my heart. My breath came in ragged gasps. My senses ignored the distant sound of footsteps, the flickering light casting shadows across the walls. I could only fight to feel the heartbeat of the one I couldn’t bear to lose. The fragile red thread that my grandma had talked about so many times was threatening to snap at any second, condemning me to a reality where Lia was gone.

#noah sebastian #noah sebastian fic #noah sebastian x ofc #bad omens fic #bad omens #bad omens fanfic #jolly karlsson #nick folio #nicholas ruffilo #koi no yokan

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