#left behind part 5

[scribbles97]

Left Behind - Chapter 50

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 Chapter 48 / Chapter 49 Read on Ao3

Aunt Val had been quiet on their way home. In itself, it wasn’t an unusual occurrence, yet, the way she had snapped at Gordon when he had tried to lighten the mood suggested there was something more wrong than met the eye. 

Virgil had been preoccupied with Scott and Tia on the scene. He had almost forgotten about the conversation he had witnessed between Mom and Aunt Val. It was apparent that he wasn’t meant to know about it. Or maybe, Mom had just forgotten too, Tia distracting her as much as she had him. 

Except, it seemed that Aunt Val hadn’t forgotten.

So the flight home had been painfully silent. 

That Kay had met them in the hangar, ready with crates of supplies that needed restocking, had only seemed to worsen their Aunt’s mood. Virgil had noticed the way she had stiffened when Kay had appeared, the way her brow had dropped into a deep frown and her lips pressed into the thinnest of lines. 

Had she and Mom been discussing her?

Kay had been out the previous day, tracking something that he wasn’t allowed to ask about. Virgil hadn’t seen her in over forty-eight hours and was sure Aunt Val had gone even longer without seeing the younger woman. 

The glare she had received though hadn’t put Kay off, she had simply turned to him with a smile.

“Eos sent me a stock list. I thought I’d help, then we can go and see Scott.” 

It wasn’t like Kay, not that she was ever unhelpful, but she knew he liked to check his ship’s stock himself. It was his responsibility, and she always left him to it. 

As Aunt Val huffed and stormed off across the hanger though, his tired brain finally gave in and decided to leave her to it. 

“Do you know what’s up with her?”

Kay was watching after her too, a frown replacing what must have been a forced smile. 

“Her and Mom had some words at the scene.” He murmured with a shrug, “I don’t know what about.”

Kay paused for a moment, her frown deepening before she turned to look up to him, “I think you should go and talk to her.”

Virgil startled, looking down to her with a frown, “Me?”

“Yes.” She nodded, “It was when I mentioned Scott that she reacted.”

He was too drained to question how she had noticed that tiny detail, or to press any further just why it was down to him. It was Kay after all, and if there was anyone’s judgement he trusted it was hers. 

So he had headed off to get washed and changed. If he passed the kitchen in the hunt of coffee before he went looking for his Aunt, it was simply so his brain was firing on all cylinders. 

“Oh.” 

She looked up from the frying pan as he froze at the bottom of the stairs, the statement falling from his lips before his brain booted enough to stop it. 

Aunt Val snorted and waved towards the coffee machine with the tongs, “There’s coffee in the pot.”

He didn’t say anything as he grabbed his mug from the cupboard and the cream from the fridge. If anything, the last thirty seconds had proven the need for his fuel before any form of conversation was going to happen.

“Every Saturday, your Uncle Lee and I used to make a fry-up breakfast.” She started as Virgil settled onto one of the stools with his drink.

There was a vague recollection of his Aunt and Uncle cooking together, though the where and the when escaped him. When the last time the pair had cooked together had been, he wasn’t sure, Mom and Dad had done most of the cooking when they had all moved to the Island. 

“Then it was your Mom and Dad’s thing,” she continued as she poked at the sausages in the pan, “I think they did pancakes because they knew Lee couldn’t make them.”

He was listening, quietly absorbing every word he could, even if his brain hadn’t quite woken up enough to interpret the point behind her words. Taking a sip of coffee, he watched as the fat in the pan bubbled and spat, landing on the glass of the hob and settling there in a splattered pattern. 

“Then your Dad went, and your Mom still made pancakes. Every Saturday, she made sure of it. It killed her though, every time, she did it knowing that Jeff wasn’t ever going to make them with her again.”

Virgil remembered the Saturdays after Dad vanished too well, remembered how Mom’s smile had been too tight every morning, how her hand had always shook as she passed the syrup across the table. Scott had always covered when she had slipped away in the middle of breakfast, eyes brighter than they should have been. 

For all he had wanted to follow her, he knew that his own mental state hadn’t been strong enough at the time. Back then he would have done anything to never see Mom cry again. 

“What would you do Virgil?” She asked him, “Would you just put on a brave face and carry on?”

She might as well have shoved him off of his seat and onto the floor. 

“What?” He blinked, setting his mug down, “I don’t-- what do you mean?”

She was focussed on the pan in front of her, avoiding looking back to him as she turned the bacon. He wondered if she regretted the sudden question out of nowhere. It was so out of the blue, even with coffee in his system he wasn’t sure he could connect the dots.

“If something happened to Tanusha,” She murmured, turning off the pan and setting down the tongs on the counter as she turned to face him, “Like it did to your father, like it has to Tia, what would you do?”

He understood the question, but the answer was far from simple. 

Aunt Val had lost Uncle Lee. 

Mom had lost Dad. 

Scott might have lost Tia. 

He could so easily lose Kay.

“I don’t know.” He admitted softly with a shrug, the thought of Kay stuck under the rubble in Tia’s place sending his stomach lurching. 

Looking back to his Aunt, he swallowed. She was braced against the countertop, head bowed over the pan of forgotten food as she slowly shook her head, eyes distant and unseeing.

“You will never understand the pain until it hits you square in the chest.” She whispered, “And then it’s too late.”

He knew what she was saying, could attempt to fill the holes that he knew he had missed earlier. 

“I don’t think we can choose who we fall in love with.” He murmured softly, hands cradling his coffee, willing the warmth to replace the stone cold dread that had filled his chest. 

She shook her head where she stood, Virgil wasn’t sure if she was capable of words any longer. 

Yet what did he say to fill the silence? What did he say to make it all better? 

None of them had any idea where Uncle Lee had gone. He had vanished without a trace and without a word. They had tried all the possible routes, contacts, and places, yet he was simply gone. 

It had taken the rest of them months to get over Dad’s disappearance. 

Why should Aunt Val be any different for the man she loved?

“I think that’s the thing about love,” He murmured softly, “It opens us up to the worst hurt we could ever imagine, and yet we walk into it anyway.”

And he could only hope that he would never put Kay through that kind of pain. 

It was the life they had chosen though, a job they had gone into with their eyes wide open. They had all seen the risks, heard the reports of missions gone wrong, watched when their own family had come back injured. 

He didn’t doubt if he had to do it all again he would make the same choices again. They did good, they helped people that truly had no other hope, they saved lives. 

It was an unfortunate truth that maybe doing what they did made other aspects of their lives so much more complicated. 

“I’m not so sure it’s worth it,” She whispered, eyes closed as she sucked in a breath, “The love doesn’t seem quite so good as the pain is bad.”

It wasn’t the time to point out that things hadn’t been good between his aunt and uncle for some time. Mom always said there was a very fine line between love and hate, and he could see how Val and Lee were prime examples of the case. Both still loved each other immeasurably, but so much had happened to drive them apart in life. Even when he had been young Virgil had been able to see the fear and hurt bubbling over as anger towards one another. 

Was it maybe the case that their love just hadn’t been strong enough? 

Was his and Kay’s love any stronger?

“I don’t want you boys to get hurt like that.” She swallowed, straightening to look at him with tears in her eyes, “It hurts too much to let any of you go through.”

He sighed and let go of his coffee, hopping down from the stool to go to her. He wasn’t taller than her, but he was definitely broader and it was easy to engulf her in a hug. Instinct would have been to tell her it was okay, that none of them were going to get hurt like that ever. 

Except it was a fools promise to make, the kind of thing just said in the moment to put a plaster over a wound that needed much more attention. 

“I love her Aunt Val,” He sighed, “I can’t change that. Being paranoid about what might happen isn’t any way to live. But, if the worst does happen, I know that I’ve got people around me that understand.”

It wasn’t much consolation, he knew. She was obviously still hurting, still grieving and afraid of what else might go wrong. 

“And so have you.” He added, “You’ve still got the rest of us.” 

She nodded wordlessly, eyes still screwed shut against the tears that hadn’t fallen. 

“We’re all here for you Aunt Val. Whatever you need, we’re here.”

#thunderbirds are go #scott tracy #thunderbirds 2015 #virgil tracy #Val Casey #Kayo Kyrano #Lucille Tracy #Left Behind #Left Behind PArt 5 #scribbles writes #romance

[mwagneto]

sheet music is so special to me. someone hundreds of years ago made something beautiful and said i can't play this for you but i can tell you how. you can recreate my work and hear my art through your own. agh

#like do you ever think about that.... old music didn't stick around like paintings and #words do but centuries later we still know what they sounded like coz they #left behind instructions anyone can follow and hear them.... sounds surviving across all this time...waaa #in other words i finally learned gnossienne no. 1 after putting it off for like literal years #it took like. 5 tries tops to get all the notes idk why i delayed it for so long it's #one of my favourite pieces #the rhythm is the tricky part you rly have to nail the everything for it to sound as intended #i think i got it but i can't tell #it looks so simple and it is on paper but the actual movements are so precise #barking #classical music

[probablyaseamonster]

Things I’m excited to see in s5

- Azure Lion finding out who was pulling the strings the whole time (his eyes glowed ink green when he achieved his goal and I think that that’s something)

- The reveal of who stole the scroll and presumably gave it to Jin & Yin or AL (I firmly believe it wasn’t Azure because the person in the cloak had human proportions)

- Azure getting stuck with leaderly responsibilities (this could very well be played for comedy)

- Everyone learns why exactly the Jade Emperor being absorbed(?) is such a bad thing for the universe

- Peng insulting more people down to their core (I am firmly on the side of the fandom that likes that bird and I think he’s got an interesting role in the group dynamic)

- Yellow Tusk being wise in a significant way (like maybe a line where he’s like “Hey Azure, something’s up with you, maybe calm down a little?”

- Nezha being taught that he has value beyond what post he can take up and maybe having a cute moment where he at least smiles

- More content regarding Princess Iron Fan’s days as a celestial (this one I’m fine with because that shot with her and DBK’s first meeting is everything to me)

- More DBK angst (dude clearly has an issue with being called “weak” and I want to see another adorable shot with him and his wife saving each other from the ink)

- Red Son confronting his own issues + maybe even his parental abuse (maybe we could get flashbacks if we’re lucky)

- MK OR MEI RESCUING RED SON (if the show ends up leaving the fam in the scroll because they’re villains and it gets them out of the way I will be PISSED)

- MK, Macaque and the audience finally seeing what mind games Wukong was being put through (because we didn’t actually get to see that in s4 and since he never got out I bet we’re being set up to finally see him and Mac’s fallout in s5)

- More monkey form MK (hopefully him eventually coming to “embrace it” without “accepting his destiny”)

- MK finding out what exactly Subodhi meant by the stone being remade to make another celestial / demon monkey, but MK not actually being born from the stone (maybe getting to meet that goddess in the artwork who potentially shaped him (Quanyin?))

- Finding out what happened to the Samadhi Fire (we haven’t seen Mei use it since LBD and the only time it was mentioned since was Subodhi talking about it in past tense, and honestly if the writers nerfed her simply because they had trouble write conflict while Mei had that universe-destroying power I’m kinda chill with that)

- Sandy’s being “too nice for [his] own good” becoming a character flaw that he has to get past in order to save his friends (someone on tumblr came up with the theory that Sandy’s hiding something and being super nice on purpose and I haven’t been able to stop thinking of it)

- Seeing WTF happened to the Mayor after LBD’s defeat (did he shrivel up and die because his source of immortal power was destroyed? did he actually get arrested by the Megapolis law enforcement that we’ve never seen because everyone saw their mayor hanging behind the demon freezing and destroying the city + he’s more closely connected to human society than any of the other villains so he deserves a human punishment? Or did he actually get away and is currently plotting revenge while having an identity crisis? (please writers even if he anticlimactically died off-screen I WANT TO KNOW))

#wow ok this was a lot of stuff #but I wanted to cover all of my thoughts #I might actually think of more later so I might ykow add part 2.5 #lego monkie kid #lego monkie kid season 5 #lmk #lmk s5 #lmk season 5 #longpost #I'm so invested in this 2 part season #they really left episodic format behind since season 3 #Lily Orchard is gonna hate this #but Ink MK is right #now that they've experienced all that they have it's impossible to go back #the show is clearly disregarding that old rule of episodic superhero shows not developing their protagonists or acknowledging their trauma #LMK is becoming darker and I have mixed feelings about it #also I did not expect MK to actually be surprised that his name could also be an acronym for his title #I guess he really wasn't lying when he said his name was so long he went by MK #his mind was BLOWN #love that identity realization for him #at first I was sceptical of monkey mk being canonized #because I thought it was fine that mk was just a normal teenager who inexplicably had easy access to the monkey king's powers #it is a kid's show after all #but Tang pointing it out actually proved the show had more thought put into it than I'd realized #of course that's not to say that the show isn't clever or doesn't have meaning #I just thought lmk was going to be more like a thoughtless kid's show with a bit of heart #but honestly #considering my child self #I would've been so grateful for this plot twist #because I was a kid who analyzed the heck out of any show I watched

[comixandco]

i think something people forget about pink diamond is that she had compassion for life long before she went to earth

the pebbles assume steven is pink not because of his gem or aura but just because he says ‘hello’ and ‘thank you’ to them, a basic common courtesy that nobody else has given them in thousands of years

in steven’s pink visions, blue is yelling at pink about the little bugs she let loose on homeworld. when one of them is found in her cell, she is quick to check it’s okay before helping it out of the room. even before encountering humans she valued organic life.

even the garden, the setting of pink’s cruellest moment, is proof of her care for organic life. Unlike every other part of homeworld, the garden is teeming with plant-life, which was kept healthy enough that it continued to grow even after pink abandoned it. the only other homeworld structure that tends to organic life is the human zoo. who’s to say the garden wasn’t another attempt by the other diamonds to placate pink after she expressed concern for the life on one of their colonies? or maybe pink picked the plants herself from the many different colonies she visited and grew them there.

pink wasn’t perfect. she had a bad habit of acting on her emotions and impulses without considering the consequences of her actions, and she hurt a lot of people because of it. but she considered all life precious and worth protecting, it just wasn’t until she had a colony of her own that she fully understood that the expansion of homeworld was intrinsically linked to the destruction of life, and the moment she realised that is the moment she stood against it.

#steven universe #su pink diamond #this post is almost 5 years too late lol #like padparadscha by the time my thoughts have found their way from my brain to my mouth the moment is long gone #but a hot take is a hot take even if it’s been in a slow cooker #i just think people are sleeping on the pebbles and the scene with the little rainbow catipillar #there always seemed to be a sentiment that pink was an inherently cruel person and that she didn’t care about anything before earth? #and that her care for life was either superficial or out of left field #but something my brain keeps rotating round is that she was always like this she always cared for other life forms but never took them #seriously. she always cared about them but never really paid close attention to how they were. and it was something she learnt off of the #other diamonds who treated her exactly the same as she treated everybody else. they loved her but they didn’t understand her and they #never made an effort to change that. and they never thought about how their actions made her feel or whether she was responding to their #own outbursts and emotions. and she never considered how her actions would make other people feel. #she didn’t think how her screaming would hurt volleyball until it happened. she didn’t consider how all-encompassing her orders to spinel #and pearl and potentially garnet were. she didn’t think about how spinel would be hurt by being left behind and quite frankly i do think #she completely forgot spinel existed once she became preoccupied with saving earth which is horrible but also makes total sense for her #character who from creation was taught that other gems were worth less than her and that they existed only to serve her or her fellow #diamonds; and as somebody who was used to the concept of being left behind and abandoned whenever the people she cared about got bored #or annoyed with her. it hurts but it’s a part of life to her. what she didn’t consider js that her words are law and she left spinel with #no free-will. she left pearl physically unable to share important information and solve the problems she left behind. #and she doesn’t consider how her death will make others feel - she doesn’t think the diamonds will care that she dies but they do and they #murder all of her friends except for two. she thinks the crystal gems will be fine without her if she says goodbye to become steven but #they aren’t and a good portion of the show is about the gems grief and how it creates an unstable environment for steven to grow up in #consistently pink diamond was taught her feelings didn’t matter and was made to feel nobody cared about her if they weren’t compelled to #and that compiled with the privileged position she was formed into made her an insecure spoiled brat who had no comprehension that her #choices could hurt people around her #did she ever even consider that the diamonds were grieving her? or did she think it was just another action of violence to exert control? #i don’t think i’ll ever be over pink diamond #funnily enough steven has a similar problem e.g. sadie’s talent show and when connie was upset he gave himself up to homeworld #but that’s a discussion for when i’m not at tag limit lol

[gumy-shark]

ive seen so much bullshit in this fandom about lizzie's permadeath and the canary curse. so lets fight this the best way possible: thinking of meta explanations that DONT make her death all about a man. please share them with me i want to talk about SECRET LIFE LIZZIE. AND HER TRAGIC FUCKING STORY

#mcyt #traffic life series #secret life smp #i already liked thinking of each season as corresponding to a season in the year #(i.e. 3L is fall LL is winter DL is spring-into-summer and limlife is summer-into-fall) #which would make SL the start of a new 'year.' and with that new 'year' old curses get left behind to make way for new ones #OR that lizzie (who watched the series she wasnt a part of) is a part time Watcher #and that gave her the power to be a spanner in the works and interrupt fated events #but in return isolated her from other players #OR finally the funeral thing i saw someone talking about once and then my brain decided to expand on bc Worldbuilding #where holding a funeral for someone/building a grave for them before they die #tricks the universe into allowing someone to live longer and defy fate since it thinks theyre already dead #but i still like my first explanation since that also accounts for scar's 'red by session 5' curse breaking #sighs. the Torment Nexus

[schadenfredde]

If I see one more horrible take about how Giorno wanted power and manipulated his friends to take it I'm gonna

I'm

I'm gonna write a Giorno analysis essay

#jjba #jojo's bizarre adventure #giorno giovanna #jjba part 5 #vento aureo #seriously did we watch the same anime #Giorno didn't nearly sacrifice himself or his dream multiple times to make sure no one was left behind for you to call him heartless #even the murder of Polpo was because he caused the death of a janitor at Giorno's school #Giorno has faults but being selfish/manipulative is NOT one of them #it literally was not his fault his friends died. they all made the conscious choice to betray the boss knowing they could die #saying they were manipulated is taking away their agency #also if you're going to hold Giorno keeping quiet about his plot to defeat the boss against him #then you better hold it against Bucciarati too because he did the exact same thing #if I keep going I'm gonna write the actual essay in the tags so I'll stop #fredd's autistic ramblings

[lavend3r-stardust]

Idk i just wanna be held and comforted or some sappy shit. I just wanna feel worthy of affection and know that people actually want me for who I am instead of what I do for them, i don't wanna the back-up friend anymore. I don't wanna reach for shit that isnt even there anymore, like i'm trying to hold onto nothing. And i keep embarrasing myself by trying to start talking with them and they just sit there like . . . They don't care. They're not looking at me, they're just working and waiting for someone else. That's all they do. Tolerate me and always talk with other people. They never fucking needed me and that's ok. I'll cut them off for my sake. I can't keep going back to people who don't care for me when i could have better conversations with gravedirt.

#hurts to cut them off because you thought they could be everything you wanted in a friend . . . but you forget about them after a few weeks #they were just an obsession i had for 5 years because i thought they could fill in the gap my old friend left behind when she moved away #clearly they have priorities and i'm not one of them that's fine #i hate inviting them over bc interactions are so fucking shallow with me and they clearly care more for everyone else #it's always those ppl in their circle and i dont feel like i part of them yk? i'm not in the group i just follow them around like a dog #if they can't reach out to me i won't waste my time on them . . . because it's always me who starts conversations and they never do #shira talks #vent post #tw vent #venting #rant post #personal rant

[dirt-str1der]

Idk anything about Yakuza but your posts seem imply Kiryu is a faggot. Can you confirm?

He likes both girls and boys but has a finicky nature about when and where he likes them because sometimes he cant get enough and other times he doesnt even realise that people are real but he is in fact a gigantic slobbering faggot thank you so much for asking

#Thanks for the ask ! #kiryu literally pegs men and eats an insane amount of pussy its part of his dietry requirement #he has lines of men and women queuing up to have their cocks destroyed by him and thats a promise #i cannot stress how fantastically bisexual he is #like he will sleep with you but you have to be direct about it because he is a man who when it comes down to it speaks with his fists #in battle. like the only girl hes ever kissed (made a move on) is the only feeemale battle companion #his actual canon on paper love interest is a girl who was more widely accepted as his literal (adopted) sister and he adopted her kid #so they were like umm yeah kiryu loved that woman look hes raising her daughter but him and that lady barely interacted because she died #and his other girlfriend went to america and he was like bye :) good luck :) #im not saying ‘oh he cant keep a girlfriend so he must like guys’ no he cant keep a boyfriend either #the one guy who followed him around with a gigantic loving puppy gaze he left behind to go start an orphanage without <- cannot stress #enough that kiryu Clearly likes him back its just that hes not built for long term relationships. he just has an extremely passionate row #with a person jampacked with fervour and heated romance then they say goodbye forever #oh but there was a girl he absolutely refused to fuck in yakuza 5. she stripped down to nude in front of him and he put his jacket over her #and was like get out of my house mayumi

[aro-aizawa]

sighs in contentment......

#shut up danni's talking #hi yes i always feel happy as FUCK when i read a v long fic but doubly so when i realise that i caught up before the end #i have spend idk how long maybe 4/5 days reading a 700k+ word fic #w only two more chapters left and i just. oh BOY #i cannot even begin to get into all the details i adore about this fic #and yes i am absolutely talking abt mortified #i spent the majority of the time listening to it via text to speech while playing mindless games #but when i got to the parts i hadn't read before (like the last 50 chaps i think) i had to give it my full attention #i just. there is so much i love. #it just adds so many aspects of world building that feels so right that its almost unnatural when i see things that goes against it #i just. #also theres no shortage of pride in there too bc wow 700k words in under a week? deffo good #HOWEVER my goal w listening to it rather than reading was hopefully something that'd take longer #considering how i read faster than it takes to speak things alas i'll have to wait for chapters again which is weird #i have been behind on it for so long #i have this mega word doc summarising the fic that i was working on to help me keep up w plot threads #and im not joking abt the mega its mammoth and i gave up in parts #i'll probs work on it as i reread it again at some point #its deffo smth i'm gonna share when its done bc i it is LONG and i know ppl don't have as much time as i do #but i want the opportunity for ppl to not balk at the size of the fic to not even attempt to read it #or if they want to read it but can only read a chapter a day so they'll need a reminder #one of the things i'll always be thankful for in fanfics is when ppl bookmark fics with a summary of the plot #its just. its reassuring to me to know vaguely what's going to happen #esp bc some plot elements will always instantly call to me #i can't begin to tell you how many fics i've ebbed and erred on but were ultimately swayed by bookmarkers' summaries #also i like to reread seconds of fics if i don't reread the whole thing #so knowing where those sections are located is v v helpful #anyways thats my lil fan project for mortified lol #always get a lil flustered when i interact w the author bc WOW the skill????? the dedication??? always a lil in awe #now to zone out and stare at my ceiling trying to process that masterpiece

[beatriceportinari]

Another reason immortality would suck is you'd always know this was there so in 10000 years when people find it you'd have to be like ouuuh I wonder what's in there 😑 and you'd be the only one not having fun being surprised

#one time in highschool/early college i left a note for myself behind my.bookshelf thinking i'd forget it and find it when i got away #with questions for my future self #except for some reason this became part of like. #you know those events that somehow get imprinted in your mimd no matter how banal like that one time when you were 5 and climbed a chair #anyway this note also got imprinted in my brain so every day i was seeing my.bookshelf and I knew it was there #so i just got it and amswered the questions like 2 years after lol

[rise-my-angel]

.

#i know people liked the sequel to the last of us #but i didn't #and i kinda wanna write a fix it fic to make it more interesting #instead of a long drawn out revenge story #make it a short story about Joel having to face the fact that he's left some people feeling broken like he once did #but also by making the doctor an actual bad person so abby has to realize that shes trying to avenge a fake idealistic version of her dad #pose the question of #is the pain joel left behind for the families worse then the murder being committed by the doctor on innocent children #cus you cant tell me he hasnt killed children before trying to find an answer #he didnt try to go into ellies brain without first having tried it on non immune children to see if there was an answer #and it makes Ellie have to learn what Joel did but with him by her side so #they have to realize that Joel shouldnt have lied to her but so comming to terms with it #beacuse ultimately unlike everyone else who was trying to get her there #Joel was the only person who refused to leave and let her die on that table #the revenge is bad story isnt engaging #i wanna fix it #also it aint gonna be 5 years in the future cus the longer it goes on the more impossible it would be for abby to find him #also joels not gonna die beacuse i dont write main charector deaths for shock value #its still gonna be a reader fic tho cus i have an interesting idea for what part you play in this story that acts as a balance #betwen Joel and Abby #also cus I wanna kiss Pedro!Joel and no one can stop me #it wont be a long story #I don't think the story abould have been very long like in the game cus it should be a smaller more personal tale #rather then a grand adventure of bloodthirsty vengeance

[scribbles97]

Left Behind - Chapter 49

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 Chapter 48 Read on Ao3

According to the nurse she had spoken to, Scott hadn’t moved from the floor outside the theatre since they had rushed Tia in. He was still in his blues, his hair and skin greyed out by the dust from the disaster site. Blood stained his arm from someone Lucy had seen him helping much earlier on in the day. 

“You’re no use to her sat out here dwelling.” She murmured as she approached him, only sparing the briefest glance to the double doors before returning her focus to the eldest boy.

He shook his head, lips pressed together in a thin line as he glanced up to her, “I screwed up Mom.”

Tutting, she sighed, “Well I’m too old to be getting down there, so come on, up you get.”

His eyes darted past her to the door, and she didn’t need to hear his protest to know that he didn’t want to leave. 

“The doctors will call as soon as she’s out.” She assured him, “You need a shower, and a coffee, minimum.”

He still hesitated. 

“She’s in good hands Scott.”

He shook his head again, hands rubbing through his hair sending a plume of dust up to dance in the fluorescence of the lights. 

“She told me she loves me.”

She didn’t need him to add the next part. 

“But I didn’t say anything back.”

With a sigh she reached down to his shoulder, shifting most of her weight through that arm she eased down next to him to sit on the hard lino floor. 

“I told you I’m too old for this.”

Scott scoffed, leaning over to rest his head on her shoulder, “Sorry.”

“Tell me about it?”

He shrugged, “What’s there to tell? Just before Virg moved her she called me back and said it and I just stood there like a goldfish.”

Tia had been out of it when she and Virgil had emerged from the hole, a combination of blood loss and a concussion he had told her at the time. Lucy had stayed with the pair through the short flight to the hospital, trusting Scott’s ability to fly whilst they focused on their patient. 

“Do you wish you had said something?” She offered, rubbing her thumb across the back of his glove as she rested her cheek against his hair. 

He had only seen Tia briefly she knew, a dash from the cockpit to the medbay as the doctors had swarmed the ship. The slightest of nods from Lucy and he had been away with the stretcher, desperate to keep up with what was happening to her. 

“I should have told her.” He whispered, “That I love her too.”

There had undoubtedly been other things in his head in the moment, bigger thoughts about her condition and getting her out of danger. If his reaction early on in the day was anything to go by, he had barely come to the realisation of his feelings. A disaster zone was hardly a suitable place to organise ones thoughts. Lucy was hardly surprised that he had stumbled at her comment. 

“I’m not just saying that.” He added, “I do mom. I really love her. How didn’t I see it sooner?”

She knew the feeling, had been dealing with the same kind of thoughts herself since she had woken up in the infirmary weeks ago. 

“The thought of losing her…” Scott trailed off with a shake of his head, “It’s like… just thinking about it leaves this gaping ache.”

“Love is a funny thing.” She murmured quietly, “I don’t think you can quite describe it, but if you’ve felt it, you know what it is.”

“I didn’t realise that was what it was.” He sighed heavily, “I thought it was just stress and the relief of getting it off of my chest.”

The comment was filed away for later, something to keep a close eye on in the coming weeks. Scott getting burned out with stress had always been her biggest fear, but she had always thought he had coped with it in his own way. 

She just hadn’t anticipated the methods used. 

It was easy to see how the two feelings could get confused though, how ranting and raving made everything feel better. Who was it that she always went to for those kinds of conversations though? Deep down, she knew there was only a real satisfaction of relief when she spoke to one person in particular on the topic. 

“But it’s not,” Scott continued, “It’s different. It’s not like when I talk to you or Virg about what’s on my mind.”

“I love her Mom.” He sighed with a shake of his head, “And I only just realised it, right as I might lose her.”

“She’s a strong woman.” Lucy whispered to him, “Have faith Kid, you’ll be able to tell her everything soon enough.”

She wasn’t sure if she would ever have the courage to voice her own feelings. 

“As always,” A warm voice commented from the door at the far end of the hall, “Your mother is undoubtedly right, Scott.” 

Lucy’s stomach twisted as she met his eye, her heart suddenly in her throat as she wondered just how much of the conversation the man with the cane had heard. 

“Hey Hugh,” Scott forced a tight smile, “I thought you were back in London this week?”

The older man shook his head, “Penelope has it all in hand, I had planned on surprising your mother until circumstances changed.”

She hoped the heat that rose in her cheeks would go unnoticed by them both. Hugh surprising her wasn’t an uncommon thing, and she certainly never complained about his visits. 

Except, recent conversations had her mind wandering elsewhere.

“Trust what she says kiddo,” He murmured holding his free hand out to Scott, “Swing by the relatives room, get a shower and some food. We’ll call you as soon as there’s any news.”

He glanced between them both, eyes young and wide, “You’re sure?”

“Promise Scotty.” She smiled, stroking his hair, “Go and get rid of this muck.”

He accepted Hugh’s hand up, looking down himself with a grimace as he stretched out. 

“Take your time, good lad.” Hugh murmured as he patted Scott’s shoulder, “The slightest news and we’ll call.”

Scott nodded, looking back to his mother and holding a hand out, “Thanks Mom.”

She accepted the help up, using the wall for support as her bad leg took a moment to wake up and catch her weight. Scott hugged her briefly before turning and heading away.

“So,” Hugh started as the doors swung shut behind him, “Kid’s in love, huh? Been there myself, know the feeling well.”

Avoiding his eye wasn’t an option, there was something that just drew her to him, left her unable to just ignore anything he said even if she wished she could. Both of them knew there was too much left unsaid. 

Hugh knew Jeff was coming home. 

She had told him as soon as she could. 

He had been enthusiastic on the holo-call, but the light hadn’t quite reached his eye. 

There was the same sort of sadness there then.

“I’m sorry.” She whispered, a lump catching in her throat. It seemed like the only thing that there was to say, yet hardly felt like enough at the same time. 

He huffed with a shake of his head, “Don’t be. There’s nothing to be sorry for.” 

Except there was. She felt like there was so much to be sorry for. For drawing him in, accepting the company and the closeness. For letting him in but still keeping him at arms length without quite realising it. For falling in love when they were only ever meant to be friends. 

“Come here,” He murmured, holding his arm out to her. She hesitated, pursing her lips as she folded her arms around her torso, not trusting herself to go to him.

Hugh sighed again and nodded, dropping his arm as he did. 

“I understand.”

“Jeff-” She started, not trusting her voice to say any more. 

He swallowed visibly, “I know. I always knew that was where your heart truly lay.”

Clearing her throat, she blinked hard, not sure where the sudden swell of emotion that had tightened her chest had come from. 

“I’m still here for you though,” Hugh added, “I’ll always be here Luce.”

Something in her broke, snapping hard and sharp in her chest. His arm was held out again, and that time she didn’t hesitate in going to him and hiding herself in his chest. 

“I’m sorry.” She whispered again as he stroked her hair. 

“Me too Luce,” He sighed softly, “Me too.”

#thunderbirds are go #scott tracy #thunderbirds 2015 #Lucille tracy #Romance #Scribbles Writes #thunderbirds #Left Behind #Left Behind Part 5

[beardedhandstoadshark]

What is your thoughts on "the protagonist is actually insane/in a coma" fan theory?

Omg lowkey rant in the tags incoming, but outing myself here I used to be really into them back when they were popular. You name it, I‘ve probably heard of it and been genuinely into them, too.

But as fun as they are for babies first edgy fan theory, once the novelty wore off, they just suck out any fun and nuance of things for clickbait and edge. How dare a story be fantastical, surely the writers secretly conspired these minute details to overshadow the dark and sad reality lying underneath! And not just that they. Wanted to write something cool and fun.

Plus for me the fun thing about theories is that chance that it could be true, or the way things can build in fun way from there - the what if? But with these, it’s kinda…missing? "Ash is in a coma and pokemon are fake“. "The very happy girl in a happy kids show is addicted to antidepressants“. Ok. What now? There’s nothing to pull from here, no where to go, no lines to draw. It’s empty.

The one exception I‘ve got is when there’s some genuinely weird things going on with the worldbuilding and plot that it actually fits in as a proper theory. Then it’s cool! But in that case the " - is in a coma“ part is also just happenstance lol.

#another anon ask #like. on one hand there’s Fînal fantaśy 8 #granted I haven’t played it and #it’s 100% also total crap but it has the HEART #clear points with consistentlay appearing weird things starting from a precise plot point that’s left uncharacteristically open #and would shed light onto a major scene at the end that comes out of nowhere and has no explanation #while throwing in some fun things about time loops #it’s got the energy - that Ok. But what IF? And it strings other stuff together too #on the other hand there’s the Lïnk is Dead theory #because the places represent the 5 stages of grief and that somehow makes LÏNK the one being dead #and not. The world that literally has a moon falling on it and EVERYONE ELSE being the ones to die #and the whole point of the game is stopping death. #It’s the world that’s dying MatPat #why are you using Lïnks very adult ghost as proof he died as a kid MatPat #why is an entire region symbolic of Anger because a single ape was pissed #why is the creepy statue proof for the kid being dead when his is the only one that doesn’t have blank eyes like the dead folks‘ statues #game theory (derogatory) #im not ashamed to say I used to be a really big fan of it but #The science…of! was the only good part fr #I‘m very glad the guy behind it finally broke off after all these years

[mihotose]

btw did a couple runs of hades today after a few days break just to max rank all the keepsakes and it just wasnt feeling Right and i realise now i basically had zag kill himself via minotaur

#i was just really curious as to what the consequences of not making it through an area in time with that condition activated #ok i did kill asterius with like two minutes left on the timer and the Whim overtook me #and so zag spent two minutes ducking behind pillars from theseus' spear just to see what would happen #broke my like 40 streak for that. for science #You Die btw. its like -5 health for each second you pass the time limit. so you die slowly #first time since literally before my first successful escape that i died anywhere other than hades #gemitus #im not Entirely fussed about the last two achievements anymore 45/47 is pretty good #i think the impetus for this burnout is that i purposefully got hit in erebus bc i needed one more red onion #for the next part of the codex entry and then it said i needed Ten more #you want me to fail on purpose Ten more times. come on man #hades

[churipu]

BEAUTIFUL FEATURES 𓆝 ⋆｡𖦹°‧

ִ ࣪𖤐 featuring. gojo satoru, nanami kento, fushiguro megumi

ִ ࣪𖤐 warnings. cursing on gojo :)

note. while i'm working on chapter 5 of my killswitch lullaby series, i'm gonna upload something because i just got home from a get together with my big family, and part 5 of killswitch lullaby is still halfway done :(

𝐆𝐎𝐉𝐎 𝐒𝐀𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐔

"you have freckles."

averting your eyes to gojo through the mirror in the bathroom, you nodded, "mhm, they've always been there," it's not like you've made them noticeable — so the reaction was expected, you never really liked them.

"why did i just notice them?" he asks, leaning his shoulder onto the doorway, "i mean — they look really pretty y/n."

pretty didn't sit well with you, especially not when you grow up hating that certain feature. chuckling out softly, you raised a brow, "they're not pretty, they're weird, 'toru."

the male blinks, "who said that?"

"everyone else but you—" he scoffs, throwing his face to the side with a lop-sided smirk, "what? why are you laughing?"

gojo shakes his head in denial, "fuck what they think — i think they're pretty, and they suit you. why would you hide it?" the blue eyed male watches your every move as your fingers pressed on the skin colored cushion onto your skin, sealing away the beautiful dots gracing across your cheeks.

"because i feel better without them." you nonchalantly answered, patting the cushion a few times to flatten the foundation. your freckles immediately drowned under it, disappearing from sight.

gojo was silent, his face was indescribable — and you don't know what he had in mind next. frankly, he's a little angry. not at you, anyone but you. the male then stepped towards you, throwing an arm around your waist, "can i ruin your make up just the slightest bit . . ?"

"yes, but 'm not going to talk to you for the rest of the day . . . or two."

the blue eyed male chuckled, but he wasted no time wrapping his slender fingers around your wrist, peppering gentle kisses across your cheeks, right over the semi-wet foundation — leaving traces of his lips on your face. gojo didn't even care about the sticky substance graved on his lips.

pulling back, he seemed satisfied at his work of art. your make up ruined almost completely as your foundation was smeared away, the smooth layer now barely even there at all, and all was left was trails of his kisses over your sun kissed freckles.

"you're so beautiful, i'd kiss you right now — but i wouldn't want to get foundation in your mouth," he whispers, instead of leaning into your lips, he pressed his foundation laced lips along your forehead, engraving his lips on your skin.

"you're so cheesy—"

"way to ruin the moment, y/n. really great! you're lucky i love you," he grazed his thumb over his art, wiping away your foundation, "i love you and everything about you."

smiling lightly, you nod, "i love you too."

𝐍𝐀𝐍𝐀𝐌𝐈 𝐊𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐎

nanami traced his finger on your skin behind your ear, the tip of his finger grazing over the same spot again and again. his eyebrows furrowed the slightest bit, "what happened here?"

you glanced at him, "hm? what happened where?" the male didn't answer, but his finger traced your skin — specifically, where your birth mark laid. and he blinked slowly, "oh, i forgot about that. nothing happened there, 'ts my birth mark."

the male nods his head. his eyes never leaving the darker spot behind your ear, "i never knew you had one . . ." he mumbles out, a little upset he's never noticed such a beautiful feature on you through out the time he has been with you.

"i didn't want you to," you replied back.

nanami retracted his hand back, "are there any reasons why?"

craning your neck to face him, your e/c eyes averted around the room. anywhere but right at his eyes, "um . . . i don't think that my birth mark is an important feature, you know where i'm coming from?"

nanami in fact didn't, "unfortunately, not."

"i just don't think it's nice to look at," you tell him the truth, chuckling, "but i actually forgot that i had that behind my ear for a bit."

once again, his fingers flew to trace your birth mark, admiring it silently. strands of your hair gets tangled in between his fingers at the action, but the male wasn't pulling on it, "it's beautiful. you're beautiful."

"think so?" you asked.

nanami didn't answer you, but his hand cupped your face gently, pulling you close and before you knew it, his lips were on yours. it was a short kiss, but it was full of admiration and love, "i do. i mean it," he states out, gazing into your eyes.

"i love you, ken. you know that, right?"

"i love you more, y/n. you know that, right?"

𝐌𝐄𝐆𝐔𝐌𝐈 𝐅𝐔𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐆𝐔𝐑𝐎

you'd think that your boyfriend wouldn't notice the way you strain back your smile from engulfing your face? frankly, thinking megumi wouldn't notice was something stupid — megumi notices everything, especially things about you. his partner.

"why do you do that?" he questions, leaning back onto the wall.

raising a brow at him in confusion, you replied back, "do what?"

"straining back your smile — why don't you just . . . smile?" his voice was quiet, but there was something behind it. not anger, not disappointment; megumi was just confused, was it something that he should be concerned about?

even if it wasn't, he is already concerned.

his question left your mind a little hazed, wondering if you should tell him the truth or just lie your way out of this. but (thankfully), you ended up with the first choice, "i didn't want to deepen my smile lines, they look weird."

now it was megumi's mind swirling with different questions, "smile lines? why— what? what?" he mutters under his breath — mind a little disintegrated.

"it leaves a mark behind, i don't like it—"

"you look fine." he cuts you off, "you have a nice smile, don't hold it back."

coming from someone like megumi, you thought it might have been the greatest compliment you have ever gotten the whole entire year. the first genuine smile popped out on your face after a bit, the apple of your cheeks rounding as you beam out at the male in delight, "really? you mean that?"

megumi sighs, nodding, "really."

"that means a lot to me, gumi. thank you," the male blinked — he wasn't sure what had gotten you so happy, surely it wasn't his compliment, is it?

it is, "yeah."

© CHURIPU 2024 , DO NOT COPY OR REPOST ANYWHERE

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk #jjk fluff #jujutsu kaisen fluff #fluff #gojo satoru #gojo fluff #gojo satoru x reader #gojo x reader #nanami kento #nanami fluff #nanami kento x reader #nanami x reader #megumi fushiguro #megumi fushiguro x reader #megumi fluff #megumi x reader

[tojikai]

Sundered 2: EMBERS

Pairing: Gojo x reader

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 ...+

Genre: Angst

tags/cw: angst, mean!gojo(kinda), babydaddy!gojo, babymomma!reader, motherhood, insecurities, arguments, implied pregnancy, mentions of abortion

word count: 5.4k

a/n: it's not sad.

Pining so intensely for something you never had to the point where you physically ache.

Each step that you take away from Satoru’s house feels like a stomp to your already broken heart. Your eyebrows furrowed, feeling the waterlines of your eyes start to get hot and itch. You recalled the noises and laughs that you heard from them while you walked out of their door. 

They have no idea how much you want to get down on your knees and beg them not to take away the only thing you have left. 

Your feet feel heavy with each stride you make toward your car. You could taste blood inside your mouth as you bit your inner lip to channel the pain away from your heart and to your body instead. You found yourself looking for answers on why all of this has to happen to you. As if being replaced by the man you love so easily and having to see how he treats someone else a thousand times better than you were not enough, you also have to witness your own flesh and blood turn away from you. Am I really that far behind that woman?

Is she that much better that even my own child prefers her over me?

You placed your hands on the steering wheel, looking down at your lap as you let the tears fall. You kept glancing over at the gate, hoping that Satoru would come out, running with your baby in his arms. Yet, you don’t want him to see you crying miserably. You swallowed thickly, letting out a large breath in an attempt to get rid of the painfully heavy feeling in your chest.

Driving away was numbing, and all sorts of thoughts ran inside your mind. But above all of them, your eyes were focused on the toy store as it got bigger in your view. You wondered about what you could get your little love to at least make her smile when she comes home. You remembered how your gift to her, her favorite bear that she used to hug as she sleeps ever since she was an infant, was cast aside as she clings to her new ones. 

Is that a foreshadowing of how you’d end up being in her life? It scared you.

Reaching the parking lot of the store, you looked at yourself in the car mirror, noticing your bloodshot eyes. You inhaled and let a big breath out slowly, puffing your cheeks as you assured yourself that it’ll be fine when she comes home later. Your head hurts so much but you can’t afford to care, stepping out of your car and heading to the front door of the store. The first thing you saw was a pregnant, young lady checking baby books. 

She reminded you of yourself when you were still pregnant with Yui; curious about everything, eager to learn, and all was about the baby. You admit that it wasn’t like that at first, given that you were young and had to drop out of college at that time. You were anxious, torn between decisions, and terrified of what life would be like for you from that point in time. During that period, you and Satoru were ignorant but trying hard to figure everything out.

You met Satoru at a nightclub where you worked as a bartender. He was flashy, and women just flock to him as if it was the most natural thing to do around him but that night, his eyes were on you. What with persistent offers of buying you drinks and talking to your manager to let you off early for the night, you ended up in a luxurious hotel suite with him. 

He even wrote his number on the price tag of the fancy lingerie set that he bought you after he ruined the one you were wearing the previous night. He was joking that you’ll never get enough so he’s providing you his contact for next time. You thought that would be the end of it. You didn’t think that it was just fate giving you a helping hand in advance because you’d end up with a child together. 

You consider it a dumb mistake. You know that Plan Bs exist. But with a working student like you who couldn’t even have time to get a proper boyfriend, it slipped your mind. The first thing you did after you got the results was call Satoru. You thanked the heavens that he wasn’t seeing anyone, and that he remembers you. It was a tense meeting, what with you asking if he wants you to abort the fetus. Next thing you know, you two were already dealing with your mood swings. 

“Look, I really want to work this out with you, Y/N. For the baby.” Satoru sighed, slamming the door behind him as he watched you sit on your old couch. You lean your elbows on your knees as you covered your face with your hands, harshly running them down your cheeks to wipe away the big, fat tears that fell from your eyes. There are just so many things going on with your life. 

“I’m only 21, Satoru. I got my whole life ahead of me.” You looked up at his tall figure, frustration was evident in your eyes. You can tell that he was also distressed. His hair was messy, his jaw was clenched tightly, and even if you cannot see behind his tinted glasses, you can tell that he hasn’t been getting enough sleep. The dark half-circles under his eyes and the redness in them show just how exhausted and disquieted he has been in the past few days.

Satoru’s five years older than you. He was born to a rich family of politicians who don't and probably will never need support from him or the other younger generations in their household. He has a stable source of income, he could probably make life investments that could cover your yearly living expenses. He has nothing to worry about, he won’t be dropping anything if he decides to take in another mouth to feed. But you…

You’re basically your mother’s retirement plan and now you got pregnant with a kid of a man you barely know. “Y/N, listen to me.” He got down on his knees in front of you, trying to take your hands off of your face as you sob, struggling to catch your breath. What’s going to happen to you now? You didn’t even get to finish the degree that your mother was working her ass off day and night for.

“You won’t have to worry about anything, you know? I’ll handle everything you need—” He trailed, trying to calm you down as he gently grabbed your forearms. “You don’t understand!” You cut him off, snatching your hands away, aggravated that he’s not thinking about how it could affect everything in your life. “Then, what the fuck do you want to do?!” You flinched as he raised his voice at you, breathing hard as he backed away.

“You think you’re the only one who’s going to be affected by this? You think you’re the only one who’s being robbed of another future! Open your fucking eyes, stop being selfish!” Satoru snapped back, harshly taking his glasses off before throwing it across the room. You started to cry, whimpering as you used the collar of your shirt to wipe your tears away.

“I’m scared, Satoru. I’m just so scared. I can’t even take care of myself, how am I supposed to raise a child…” You broke down, turning your body away from him. There was a long pause, a moment of pure silence, save from your sniffs and Satoru’s ragged breathing. 

You felt the couch dip as he sat down before pulling you to him, letting you cry on his chest.  “I know, I know. I’m sorry.” You would be lying if you said that the back rub, the temple kisses, and his whispers of reassurance didn’t calm you down. Those thoughts were recurring in your head and now that you finally let it all out and got answers from him, you were soothed.

You blinked hard, shaking your head to get out of your trance. You went straight to the dolls section. You can’t believe you just had a flashback of Satoru comforting you in the warmth of his chest. Your mouth started to twitch, wishing that he held you like that earlier when his girlfriend was slapping into your face that they’re gonna give your child siblings. It shouldn’t hurt you, but it still did. You realized that this girl, this woman is gonna have everything you wish you had with Satoru.

You walked past the kiddie pools and trampoline section, stopping when you saw a playpen, almost similar to the one Satoru bought for your little girl but smaller. The size doesn’t really matter though, because you know that you don’t have enough space in your place for something so big, anyway. 

Going closer to check the prices, you bit your lip as your eyebrows bumped together. You were calculating your monthly expenses along with the money for your savings in case of emergency. It’s expensive but you’re determined to cut back just to buy it. You kept your eyes on the tag as you took half a step away from it but your back was met by something, or rather someone behind you.

“It’s not cheap, is it?” A man’s deep voice boomed as you turned around, but your eyes were met by a broad chest. He’s big, you thought. He’s literally blocking your view. It didn’t help that you were short enough to have to look up to see his face. He was also staring at the playpen as he held the pushcart beside him.

“Y-yeah…” You answered, a bit awkward as you found yourself admiring the guy. You admired fathers who are active when it comes to their children. You grew up without a father so, you just found it endearing. You looked away from the man, gritting your teeth as an image of Satoru and his girlfriend shopping for baby things appeared before your eyes for a split second.

“Excuse me, sir. I still have to buy my daughter a gift.” You bowed slightly before turning away. He just nodded his head, too occupied to even look at you. You proceeded to check out the little dolls, hoping that you’d find something that’ll really catch your daughter’s eye. Picking up a dark-haired baby doll with big blue eyes sitting on a stroller, you smiled as you remembered how it has the same eyes as your baby.

You went to pay for the doll, and your heart was filled with joy despite the throbbing pain in your skull and the hot feeling behind your eyes. You reminded yourself not to forget to take your medicine. Thinking about getting sick and having to leave your child for a couple of days with them again makes you anxious, afraid that she’ll never want to go home to you again. 

You hurriedly went home, driving in the midst of the rain. You put the little doll on the chair, ready to surprise your baby girl when she comes back. You had to bear with the time, constantly checking your phone if your little girl and her dad are on the way to you. Your heart swelled at the thought. 

Though, you know that you’ll never be the one he comes home to, it’s still nice to think about. 

—--------------------------------

“She really called me Mama.” Naomi giggled as she kissed his daughter’s cheek. Satoru smiled, watching them play together warms his heart. It made him feel like he was staring at his family even if he knows that his daughter isn’t hers. He pursed his lips, remembering the look in your eyes at what you heard the child say.

He felt conflicted, not knowing how to react to all of it. He doesn’t want to embarrass his girlfriend by correcting her in front of you. But he also felt bad that he just watched you walk out that door on the verge of tears. Satoru had you memorized after all this time, it wasn’t a long time but he used to watch everything you do.

“I don’t think it’s a good idea, though.” Satoru sighed, shaking his head as he pushed a bit of Naomi’s hair away from her face. Her expression dropped as she adjusted the toddler in her arms. Satoru pulled her close to his side, hugging her waist as he thought about how to explain it to her without making her feel disheartened.

“I’m worried about how Y/N will feel about it, to be honest. I don’t know but it may worry her.” He kissed the side of her forehead before stepping away as he watches his daughter’s eyes look at them. He knows that she’s still too young but he feared that she’ll get confused by all of this. 

Like why is her father not with her mother, and why is he holding someone else?

He wondered if she’ll grow to hate him for giving up on their family. “Oh, Is that so…I thought we were fine already.” Naomi’s voice was quiet as she bit her lip, making Satoru rethink. “It’s not that, I just think that maybe that’s how she might feel.” Satoru took one of her hands, kissing it before rubbing his thumb on her soft skin. “No, I understand, I got too comfortable. I’m just a girlfriend, I shouldn’t have done that.” 

Satoru doesn’t want to make her feel like this, she’s just really attached to his baby. He knows that Naomi adores kids, they often joke around about it, so he could see why she’s excited about his daughter calling her Mama. Thinking about it now, maybe this shouldn’t be so bad. After all, she’s not gonna be just a girlfriend to him forever, right? Naomi is a great person, and Satoru thinks that it’s not impossible to have a future with her.

“Don’t say that. That’s just my assumption. She’ll tell if it’s not alright, I know. We’re co-parenting so we have to talk about those stuff.” Three squeezes to her hands made Naomi smile sweetly at him, her eyes as kind as the stars. “Yeah, discussions are important. I don’t want her to feel like I’m trying to keep her away from us.” The calmness in her voice comforted Satoru.

—-------------------------------------

After receiving a text from Satoru, you found yourself staring at the mirror, retouching your makeup like it’s gonna make him fall for you. Hopeless. Not long after, the doorbell rang and you dashed to the door. There, Satoru stood with Yui asleep on his shoulders. You took her bags, along with the teddy bear that she was hugging to her chest. Seeing her holding it again made you feel relieved.

“Are you feeling better now?” Satoru inquired, walking past you to put your kid in her little bed. You hummed in response, “She’s full, don’t give her any more milk. Naomi fed her before she fell asleep.” Her again. You thought as the small smile on your face dissipated. You’re just thankful that he didn’t take her with them here.

There was a moment of silence as the two of you watched your daughter sleep peacefully. A sigh escaped Satoru’s lips before he turned to you. He was about to say something, but closed his mouth, thinking. You took a deep breath, pursing your lips as you collected your thoughts. You started to rub your hands together, trying to get rid of the cold feeling on your fingertips.

Your communication issues with Satoru only worsened when he got a girlfriend. Seeing how he is with her made you doubt the importance of your words to him. It’s like if you get stuck in a room together with her and something happens, you’re almost certain that he’d accuse you first. You wouldn’t admit it but you yearn for him. You yearn for the way he acts towards her. You yearn for the things he does for her. 

You yearn for the things he so easily, willingly offer to her; things you had to beg for when you were still together.

“Satoru, I just want to ask…Since when did Yui start to call Naomi Mama?” You looked at the ground, somewhat embarrassed of your question but can’t pinpoint why. It just made you feel…weak and insecure. And you are that. But you can’t let Satoru see it. You don’t want him to feel even more sorry for you. You can see it in his and his girlfriend’s eyes whenever they look at you. They probably pity you and the state you are in. 

Alone. With no one to hold your pieces together but you.

“I don’t really remember. Look, I was going to mention that…” Satoru trailed, looking everywhere but you. He probably noticed your discomfort earlier. “I know it doesn’t seem right to you because she’s just my girlfriend but…” Here’s the “but” again. How come he can always find the good when it comes to her, even when she literally did you so wrong by letting your daughter call her Mama and even acting like one in front of you?

Ever since Satoru got a girlfriend, arguing with him started to feel like fighting in a war without any type of armor in your body. How are supposed to stand strong, when the fact that he’ll always be on her side was your weakness? There were times when you wanted to fight for yourself but you couldn’t bear to because you know that he was shielding her from everything, heedlessly deserting you.

“I didn’t really appreciate it. I mean… I-I just think she’s not in the place to—” You thought the words you chose to describe the situation were too risky when you were cut off by Satoru, taking his glasses off. You can’t read him but he’s looking at you with that apologetic gaze again. His face was filled with contrite and you can’t quite understand why. But like a mouse sensing danger, you wanted to run away.

“I…I’m thinking about proposing to Naomi.” It shouldn’t hurt. You told yourself again. You don’t have the right to feel hurt. This man disrespected you, hurt you, and made you feel so incredibly small yet here you are, wishing you were the one he wants to spend the rest of his life with. “I know she’s just my girlfriend now, but it’s bound to change.” You suddenly just wanted him to leave. “She…she’d like to ask for permission to let our daughter call her Mom. You know she treats Yui like she’s her—” 

“I don’t want to.” You whispered firmly through gritted teeth, cutting Satoru off. You don’t wanna hear it anymore. You can’t go through that again and you can’t let that happen again. “Yui is my daughter, and I don’t want her calling anyone else Mama.” You looked up at him with glassy eyes before turning away to walk out of the room, not wanting to startle the toddler from her slumber. Satoru was instantly on your tail, calling your name.

“She’s my daughter, too. Y/n, what is wrong? I know that you have your limitations and that’s why I’m here to talk about it with you, but why are you acting like this?” He walked closer to you, trying to catch your eyes. “I know it’s not just about this, I know you’ve been having problems with her but give a reason, at least. She’s been nothing but good to our kid. ” It’s getting hard for you to breathe as you tried to process your emotions and his questions.

You proceeded to the kitchen, hurrying to grab yourself a bottle of water before you collapse, but failing terribly when Satoru spoke the next sentence “Y/N, we all have to adjust, don’t be unfair to her, she doesn’t deserve it.” 

“And I do?!” You shouted at him, taking him by surprise and making him take a step back. 

“You think she doesn’t deserve any of that shit but I DO?!” You lamented, shaking your head in pain and disbelief. There were tears streaming down your face and no pattern of breathing can help you control it. You were able to keep it in when he shoved his new girlfriend in your face several months ago, but now it’s taking its toll.

You were about to get the clothes that he bought for your daughter on your way home from work but were met with a woman snuggled up to him on his couch. You hated him for allowing you to see them like that when he knows that you haven’t even processed your split yet because a month before that, he was saying that he could fix his shortcomings for you and his daughter. 

You remember how sick you felt in your stomach when he introduced her, saying that you weren’t supposed to see them like that. It’s revolting; how he thought that you were upset because of what you saw and not because he just went back on his words. Naomi kept her head down, standing in front of you as she muttered an apology before scurrying to Satoru’s room. 

Naomi was his father’s new assistant and unlike you, she got to finish her studies. Despite being classmates in high school, she was three years older than you due to the frequent relocation of her family. Regardless of her tough childhood, she was known to be a smart kid. No wonder his mother approved of her in such a short amount of time. 

You and Satoru were never perfect but it doesn’t mean that you were never happy with each other before. The issues overpowered your interest in each other, making it hard for the two of you to bounce back. You admit that you’ve been negligent of Satoru at a certain point of your relationship but it was only because you got tired of his ways.

He would come home late, making you stay up all night because he failed to reply when you texted him, asking him his whereabouts. He’d be out drinking with friends, and it wasn’t a problem but you just wanted him to at least let you know so wouldn’t be worrying to the point that you can’t even sleep.

His mother was overbearing. You got pregnant by someone’s son in a one-night stand and that’s all she paints you with. You were belittled and told that you can’t even take care of the child properly. Hell, was she so eager for Satoru to leave you and find someone better who achieved something in life.

Consequently, this negligence led to fits of jealousy from Satoru. This drove you to quit the job you used to have after a coworker of yours who only wanted to help became the subject of his suspicions. His mother saw you getting dropped off by your friend while she was babysitting your daughter. 

It was only because your car broke down and you don’t want to bother Satoru at work. You couldn’t really blame him for thinking that way because you know that he’s been feeling invisible to you which wasn’t true. You just don’t know how to deal with it anymore and you started to pull yourself away.

It got to the point where you couldn’t even communicate how you truly feel about him because it was overshadowed by your problems. You were arrogant enough to tell him that someone could treat you right and do much better and now, look at you; standing before him and his girl. Longing for him and eating the words you spitefully told him.

Pining so intensely for something you never had to the point where you physically ache.

The memory was tormenting, heart-rending, and traumatic to you. And now you get to watch them write their happy ending while you are here, left in the dust, drowning in the feelings that will never ever get recognized and will never ever be relevant. 

It hasn’t even been a year, and he’s already planning to marry her. He’s been nothing but better to her, yet, he couldn’t even change his ways for you and your child? Couldn’t he learn to truly love you after everything you endured just to be with him? You know that you have flaws, and chose some wrong steps and paths in your relationship. 

But you can’t bear to lose him like this. You know that you could have fought more for your relationship. He’d always say that you’d work things out. So, why did he stop? How could he stop choosing you so easily?

“How could you give her the world, yet refuse me the tiny bit of what I have left?” 

Your voice was small as you backed away, defeated. Satoru couldn’t move. From everything that has happened that morning, he could tell that you’ve been on edge. To Satoru, the only thing that connects you to him is his daughter. He refuses to believe that after all of that, you can still make it work.

At least, that’s the realization he came about when he met Naomi. She taught him that love isn’t supposed to be strenuous, it isn’t always about fighting. Within his tumultuous relationship with you, she came around and showed him that he’s seen. That his feelings are valid. He came to the conclusion that maybe he just wanted to love you because you have a child together. 

“Tiny bit?” He asked, frustrated that you just won’t let this go easily, irked that you always think you’re the only one having a hard time. If Satoru’s being honest, he’s just tired of it all. He just wants you to understand his point and get it over with. But now you’re crying in front of him and again, he doesn’t know what to do. He can’t even think of the right things to say or the right decisions to make. It’s like it’s all back to square one with you.

“You call it ‘tiny bit’ when I couldn’t even live my life because of you?! I’ve given everything, Y/N! I just want to be at peace with everything and I’m obviously not having it with you!” You couldn’t even breathe through the piercing ache in your chest from the daggers that are coming out of his mouth. Your hand reached over to your chest, grasping your shirt as his every word irreversibly pulverized your already wounded heart.

“I wish I never met you that night and I wish I never had Yui with you. You’re a thorn in my side, Y/N!” By the time he finished screaming at you, you were shaking like a leaf, grabbing a chair beside your table as your wide eyes stared at him in shock. Grief, mortification, and agony were plastered on your face, and only then did Satoru’s words sink into him.

“Y/N, I—” Before he could even form a proper phrase, a loud cry erupted from the other room. Yui. He watched as you quickly wiped away your tears, seeing the emotions mix inside your eyes until they turned into a weeping void with all the tears pooling inside them.

“I…I loved you, Satoru. And I hate that even now that you’re kicking me while I’m down for the sake of someone else, I still love you.” The crack in your voice had Satoru subconsciously moving closer to you, opening his arms to pull you into him but you were quick to flinch away, sniveling.

“Please, just—just go. Do whatever you want, just d-don’t take Yui away. I’m fine with it now, Satoru.” It’s almost as though something in you died when he spoke those words to you. You don’t know if he heard because you couldn’t even hear yourself. You could feel the beat of your heart in your chest and each one of them sends a burning ache to your body. “Just go, please.” You whimpered as you bit your upper lip, looking down on the floor. 

Satoru can’t take his eyes off of your fragile figure as you leaned on the kitchen counter, slowly walking back to your daughter’s room. He remained unmoving until you exited the kitchen area. It was only after a few minutes that he decided to go, not bothering to wipe away the tears that rolled down his face as he listened to your muffled cries behind the closed door.

Each sob was filled with anguish that Satoru knows he’ll never be able to erase.

—------------------------------------------------------

A few weeks later have passed yet Satoru still doesn’t know what to make of himself. He couldn’t focus on anything that he works on. He couldn’t even workout properly, he always ends up getting angry. It was a good thing that both he and Naomi were swarmed with tasks; they didn’t have time to interact any more than what their jobs would allow. If they did, Satoru isn’t sure if he’ll be able to focus on her. She still has time to visit every week, though. During those days, she spends her time with Satoru and sometimes, Yui.

He makes sure to free his time and himself completely when he’s with his daughter so he can give his full attention to her. Satoru picks her up from your house, same schedule as before. Sometimes it’s you, but other times, it was your mother. “All I asked of you was to never break her, Gojo.” were the first words she spoke to him. Satoru can’t look her in the eyes. Your mother was a kind woman, humble and unjudging. And to have her talking to him like that, Satoru was beyond ashamed.

He couldn’t give her a reason, or an answer. All he did was apologize. Like he should. Naomi was unaware of it all and the proposal that Satoru was planning for her was set aside due to all that had happened. He just doesn’t think it’s the right time to plan about it when his relationship with you is strained. Yes, you’re not together anymore but you’re still the mother of his child and he wants to be civil with you, at least.

Yui kept asking for you even when she was with him as if sensing that her Mama was hurting. She’s always carrying the new doll that you bought for her. Satoru once asked her if you cry and she would simply shake her head. He gets nothing out of it, of course, she’s just a kid. But who else could he ask?

Satoru has no idea what you have been doing. He knows that you go to work, but other than that, he’s clueless about the places you go to and why your mother started babysitting his daughter more during the past few days. Satoru thought that maybe you just can’t stand seeing him anymore and is refusing to face him whenever he picks his daughter up. You have every right and reason to despise him, after all.

So, now he stands on the other side of your door, wondering if he’ll get to see your face this time or be welcomed with the frowning face of your mother. He knocked three times, like he always does, adjusting the collar of his shirt. To his surprise, it wasn’t any of the two women he was expecting holding the door open for him. 

“Who are you?” A shirtless man with a muscular build stood before Satoru, a curious yet accusatory gaze scanned him like he was an intruder in his own woman’s home. He leaned on his tattooed arm against the doorframe, blocking the tiny view he has of the inside. It pissed him off, clenching his jaw for a few seconds before speaking.

“Who are you?” Satoru bit back, raising his brows in an attempt to intimidate the guy. He’s only a couple of centimeters taller than the stranger but he’s bigger. It wasn’t a big deal to him until the man opened the door wider. A short, deep chuckle escaped his lips before a smug smirk appeared on his face. 

Tilting his head, the man gave Satoru a clear look at the scratches adorning his nape and the purple and maroon marks on his jaw. It made Satoru’s blood boil, unreasonably so.

“Think you know who I am now?” 

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