#like yeah it's realistic that at one point he won't be able to make people's approval of him keep going up

[lloydfrontera]

i know it's the logical conclusion and realistically it makes sense to point out that people can only like you so much. but. i really want lloyd to be proven wrong. i really want him to realize there's no limit to how much someone can love you. i want his parents and javier and julien's approval rating to keep going up even when lloyd thinks there's nothing more he can do to earn their love for him. i want him to be able to learn that sometimes love can keep growing every day for no other reason than because the other person is choosing to love you over and over again. i just want him to feel loved just for being him and not for what he does is that too much to ask for?!?

#lloyd frontera #tged #the greatest estate developer #i know it's probably not what the novel is going for but!! i can dream!! #like yeah it's realistic that at one point he won't be able to make people's approval of him keep going up #because there's only so much he can do to make them like him #but like!! love doesn't work like that!! your actions do matter when it comes to whether someone loves you or not #but at one point it also comes to the other person deciding to keep loving you! to choose to keep building upon that foundation!! #and i want lloyd to experience that!! #i want him to realize that yes there is a point where he won't be able to do more to earn more approval from them. but that it doesn't #matter because they love him and everyday they spent with him is one where they love him more #im sorry im a sucker for characters finding out how loved they are by their family and friends do you still think im hot #one thing i do have to say is that tged has always been very clear that actions do matter when it comes to people liking or loving you #like it starts with lloyd taking over the body of someone who by his own actions had made it so everyone hated him #and so he had to earn back the trust and approval of everyone around him #but that's an extreme case! it wasn't even something he had done! but it definitely influenced how he approached everyone around him #because instead of having to just start from 0 and naturally build relationships like it's normally done #he had to work twice as hard to repair what og lloyd had broken #idk i just think it's fascinating and i would love if the novel acknowledged how unfair and actually a little fucked up it was to give him #a system where he had to earn points from his relationships with others and always be aware of how much they either liked or disliked him #(something that would fuck with the self esteem of anyone) #while also putting him in the body of someone who had already done so much to burn bridges with everyone and his damn best to be disliked #but i know it's probably too much to ask for 😅 #i talk a lot <3

[gothicprep]

so glad that AI video is here! sort of. kind of. you ever want to see a screensaver that looks like it was designed for windows 2000, where fish are flying through the air across village streets? sora can do that with one easy prompt! you ever wanna see a woman lying in bed, roll over, and watch her arm turn into the comforter? sora can do that too! it's amazing! do you ever want to see a POV of an ant's tunnel that looks like something worse than what you'd see on bbc's planet earth? sora can do that too!

i'm sure we've all seen these videos and many more at this point. the ai evangelists swear that this is a game-changing revolution in its ability to turn simple prompts into movie quality video. assuming that movie quality means a late-stage mcu movie, or madame web, or a direct to video dreamworks knockoff from the early 2000s. really? none of those things. it's not as good as any of those things. and yeah, yeah, i know, "it's going to improve", "this is the worst it's ever gonna look", "it's gonna get more realistic". but there are some who will tell you that this is the beginning of a brave new world. a whole new era! we've got a whole movement that's going to unlock creativity that's been untapped, trapped within people who have no actual talent but, um, some ideas i guess. there's a deep reservoir of those people who society has been wasting for all these years.

let's be real here. more likely, the AI is probably going to be used to much more boring ends than new great works of art when it's not being used for more nefarious ends. on the more boring side of things, you'll have people on the internet say "what if you had batman fight the straw hat pirates from one piece? that's something an ai could do!" fanfic kind of stuff. "what if goku fought superman? who would win? i'll bet ai can show us that!" another thing it can bring to life? sex tapes that you didn't make, but you're going to be starring in! get ready for the future where someone gets mad at you online, and five seconds later, you're in a bondage orgy! have fun at the bondage orgy! that's what ai promises :)

but that's not the worst of it, believe it or not. the real problem with ai is that it's going to give bad actors the ability to create international crises by ginning up phony videos. want to spark a riot in the urban center of a country you don't like? fake a video of a cop killing a kid. it'll go viral and the gas stations will be burning before the city can prove it didn't happen.

wife & i were watching the second season of tokyo vice last night while we were waiting for true detective: night country to come on, and in the premiere episode, there's a video of a sex worker being beaten to death while a gov't minister looks on. when presented with the video, he pulls the shaggy defense and just says "it wasn't me". the denial doesn't wash because the technology at the time couldn't have faked it, but in short order, we're going to be in a future where we won't be able to prove it was or wasn't him. "oh, it was ai". welp. no one will know.

the ability to circulate low-quality, unverified information has real downsides. and if anything, the decades during which i've grown up with the internet prompts me towards a lot more wariness of ai than unbridled enthusiasm. if the best case scenario for ai is what the internet did to the information environment already, we're all fucked. the speed with which things can spread and proliferate is frankly terrifying. the prompts people are using now are dumb, and the programming is not very good, but the ai evangelists are right when they say it's going to get better. and as it gets better, it's going to be more tempting to use it in ways which absolutely are negative for society. i'm sure there are cgi artists working at major studios who will be able to use these things in good ways, but i sit here and i hear people talk about "oh, the great wave of creativity is going to be unleashed by ai!" and i'm just like. what kind of future are you living in, where the technology always works out the way you want, and everyone is happy, and there are flying cars in the sky and rainbows?

#oppenheimer ending but he doesn't understand the ramifications of the nuke so he's just smiling

[project-sekai-facts]

have you seen that theory about vbs not being the original owners of their sekai, and if so what are your thoughts about it?

i stared at this post for a few minutes wondering if you were talking about a post that was written by me and then i checked twitter and a post about RADder being the original owners popped up on my fyp so i'm assuming that's what you're talking about (also i realised that my post is. still in my drafts).

i go full pepe silvia under the cut. uh. sorry.

yeah anyway i do agree with that theory. kinda. The Street SEKAI is mentioned multiple times in the initial cards to have been around for a while, though this could be referring to the fact that SEKAI take time to grow before they manifest fully to the owners (think about School and Wonderland SEKAI, which probably took years to reveal themselves). But it could also imply that someone else contributed to the SEKAI before VBS. I actually talk about the theory briefly in that first linked post, so we'll continue from there.

so I don't think it was RADder. And yeah basically my only reason is that they're too old. MEIKO was released in 2006, considering the only date mentioned in the game is (Autumn) 2021, this is after An was born, when RADder was already pretty successful. Also we don't know enough about SEKAI physics to confirm this, but Miku seems to be more important than MEIKO so maybe space-time wasn't broken until 2007, and RADder is probably even more successful at that point because of the CDs they recorded when An was a baby.

the SEKAI just doesn't work in the time frame. What we know is that the Street SEKAI was formed by dreams and aspiration. Which is kinda the case for most SEKAI but Street SEKAI was more specifically formed by the passion its creators have for these dreams. and while RADder had big dreams to be top musicians in the world and was passionate about that, they were like realistically never gonna achieve that, but also they were at a point where they were doing very well and were very successful and on their way there. they didn't really need the help from Miku as much as VBS needs it.

Now the way Nagi talks about some things in Light Up the Fire definitely could be read a certain way, especially when she talks about passing on RADder's dream to the kids in the audience at RW, but I still don't think RADder being the original owners entirely works. Honestly the easiest point to argue for that claim is that the Street SEKAI has a very strong attachment to RAD WEEKEND, which on the one hand could be part of the fact that Taiga very clearly never moved past it and never fully processed the death of his sister, but it makes a lot more sense to be a trait tied to the people who aspire to surpass it. also MEIKO outright says that's why the attachment to RW is there in her initial 2*.

However,

I don't think it's entirely out of the question for some of the other side characters to have an influence over the Street SEKAI. As I've mentioned, the SEKAI has a strong attachment to RW, and all of them have the same goal of surpassing the event. Also the 4 older VSingers in the SEKAI (MEIKO, KAITO, Luka, Miku) all takes traits from the members of RADder. Which makes a lot of sense for the main mentor figures in the SEKAI to be based on the people that the kids look up to.

There is an argument to be made though that they gave up on their dreams to easily. In LUTF, Taiga decides to crush all their dreams and Tatsuya (+ his group), Arata and Kotaro all leave, like, they just give up while (an admittedly very shaken) VBS sticks with their dream.

Tatsuya and EVER leave because all this time they'd been just carrying on until they eventually saw victory, but after taking a beating from Taiga, they realised that there's some things that you won't be able to overcome and give up.

Arata leaves because even though he has skill, Taiga was able to get through to his weakness - Souma. Taiga realises that Arata has experienced a similar loss and grief to he did, and although Arata is trying to carry Souma's dream on his behalf, Taiga knows from experience that Arata is just clinging on to Souma's dream as a way of coping with his loss, rather than actually trying to uphold it (basically he calls him selfish). Arata isn't able to argue back, feels a lot of guilt over that, and leaves.

Kotaro is like. particularly interesting and also most eligible for Miku therapy. He's genuinely really scared and overwhelmed by Taiga's challenge, and gives a poor performance when he has to stand up to him, and straight up gets called shit and weak by Taiga and the audience. Dead serious. Afterwards he literally has a breakdown, calls himself an idiot for not being able to sing and then goes on about how he's shit at everything and apologises because should've given up ages ago because all he's ever done is drag everyone else down before literally running away and DAMN do I hope he gets development on that in the Toya event.

all things considered i'd honestly say that all of them to some degree could've contributed to the formation of the SEKAI, Souma included (honestly he seems the most passionate about it even though he was forced to give up). all of them were passionate about it but then there's always the fact that they all gave up really easily, although they were reluctant. that said, toya did the same thing in the main story so...

Although,

There's still an argument that the Street SEKAI was just formed by the four of VBS, and Kohane was just the final piece of the puzzle that made it reveal itself. Three passionate people who are wholeheartedly devoted to their dream and one ordinary girl who wants to do something that she can dedicate herself to and feel passionate about. inverse MMJ if you will. fate is probably canon in project sekai also like i've mentioned this a few times before so that could play a part in all this.

but come to think of it, the sekai doesn't even reveal itself to Akito and Toya until really late in the main story. supposedly they still heavily influenced it but that's a bit... odd? don't you think? like the only other times that happens is N25 and WxS, wherein the SEKAI was made by only one person and let the others in later, but this was a SEKAI that was supposedly made by all 4 of them. so if you think about it hard enough, could the street sekai maybe do that again?

Also,

Nagi is very important to the VBS story and lore despite the fact that she was very obviously written in much later in development. Going back to the fate thing, at RW she states that since RADder is over and she's over, she now has a new dream, that being that she wants the next generation to be inspired by what they achieved and carry on their legacy. While when she says that, she's talking about An and Akito in the audience at RW, it's stated multiple times that the "next generation" includes all of VBS, and all the side characters. so yeah, the fate thing. I doubt the game will ever do anything about it since they're side characters, but I think it can be argued that they contributed to the SEKAI a bit.

i wrote this in so many increments and in the wrong order and now it lacks any cohesion whatsoever and i have no idea what i'm even saying at this point and i think i sort of proved it and disproved it simultaneously but like. yeah. it's an alright theory. i have some thoughts on it.

#project sekai spoilers #theory #mod talks #asks #part of this may or may not be copypasted from an essay i wrote on another blog so if any part of it seems familiar shhhh no it doesn't

[hobbinch]

The assessment went! Interesting! I'm pretty sure I'll be able to get a power scooter covered by insurance if I want one, if I say the word to the PT I saw. This was the first time in this whole process I've spoken to people who know MORE about how it all works than I do. This process is so fucking overwhelming oh my god.

Now I'm on the fence on if a power scooter or a light manual wheelchair with a motor attachment would be better for my lifestyle. Part of why it was so overwhelming/confusing was that while I *did* get information that I needed and couldn't have easily gotten anywhere else, the vendor from a power chair company who was there was SO FRUSTRATING OH MY GOD.

At one point we were discussing if I could break down a power scooter to keep in my car and and it was like

Him: well if you're anything like my wife, you won't want to go to JUST one place while you're out

Me: Then I'm not like your wife? I'll be fine going to one place and then home for the plans I have to use the scooter (id made it clear by now that i can use the walker for short errands but need a powered aid for things like museums or potential jobs)

Him: Yeah but imagine if you weren't disabled and could do everything you want in a day, would you still want to just go to one place

Me: That's not a situation I'd ever be in, so that fantasy isn't useful for me to follow? I'm trying to be realistic.

And kept talking about how if *he* had to break apart the scooter and take it out of a car he wouldn't want to do anything afterwards, which like. Ok? This isn't FOR YOU. I practiced taking it apart and lifted the parts to a table, and my reaction to it was "Well this has me glad I'd be hypothetically sitting down for a while after I do this"

I still got valuable info about power scooter and wheelchair companies overstate how "transportable," or the ads assume the customer already has an aide and/or a car with a lift, and about what further research I can do before I make an expensive decision. But also oh my god I hate him so much. He kept making so many frustrating assumptions about my life and level of disability, and *completely* ignored jay who was sitting Right There even while saying shit like "if you bring a friend with you then you could just have them push your manual chair instead of using the motor :)" I hate youuuuuuu

If anyone has direct experience with the difference between motorized add-ons to chairs and power scooters I'd love literally any guidance. This shit sucks so much oh my godddddd

#welcome to my twisted bones

[skaruresonic]

Shadow had an entire game exploring everything there is to know or say about his past and feelings on maria/gerald/and the ark. And in the true ending he says "goodbye shadow the hedgehog" meaning that he's moved on completely. Everything that happened back then is in the past and it won't chain or define him any longer

So yeah. It's really annoying when "fans" of the character demand that everything shadow does, says, or thinks, should be completely revolved around the ark, forever.

They say the characters are stale and need to do different things but also clap and cheer at the idea of having a character chained to one thing for their entire publication history. It makes no sense whatsoever

I personally prefer Battle's take where he gives Emerl the Chaos Emerald, saying he doesn't need it because he has Maria in his heart. It's a much more realistic, balanced, and grounded approach to the issue than acting as though the past never mattered imo.

Nonetheless, the point remains that Shadow's moved on. The games are trying to invent new problems for him, trying to build up new depths of character or at least tell some kind of story with him, but this inability to see anything but SA2!Shadow as the only valid Shadow is hindering him in that regard.

---

So yeah. It's really annoying when "fans" of the character demand that everything shadow does, says, or thinks, should be completely revolved around the ark, forever.

I wouldn't even necessarily have a problem with Shadow revisiting ARK memories as long as they provided a new perspective and it wasn't just torture porn for angst's sake.

ST probably has the best idea out of all of us. Recent Shadow offerings sometimes have him reflect on the past, but in a bittersweet manner that is never overbearing. I'm thinking about that comic about Shadow remembering how he got his name, as well as the most recent Sonic Channel piece where he walks by a store and sees blue shoes in a window.

ST allows us the breathing room to reflect on these moments and grapple with the emotional resonance on our own time, instead of cramming suffering down our gullets in the hopes that we'll cry on command.

In addition, Karasuno's art of Maria and Shadow taking tests and stargazing is just plain adorable ;A;

---

They say the characters are stale and need to do different things but also clap and cheer at the idea of having a character chained to one thing for their entire publication history. It makes no sense whatsoever It's an oxymoron. If Shadow is only Shadow to you only when he behaves like he did in the past, how are you able to recognize him when he does literally anything else in the future? You can't. People see him not acting like his former brainwashed self to a tee, and they assume it's OOC.

It's like when Infinite tormented him in Virtual Reality using Omega and Rouge's faces and voices, but that still wasn't good enough. Infinite apparently needed to psychically know who Maria was and torment Shadow with her memory... Even though that would have never worked since, unlike Rouge and Omega, Shadow knows for a stone-cold fact that Maria is dead. Because he spent three freaking games coming to terms with that.

If Infinite had really tried it, he would have been like

#asks #gif

[ventruevitae]

Katerina's baby sister is a Lasombra? :0

indeed!

of course, she had no idea of this until Many years after the event had already taken place, but yeah, elissavet is still out there & survived despite the odds. she was embraced a short handful of years after kat was by a lasombra looking to gain a foothold within the camarilla. not exactly a mirror of apollonnio, but definitely not a person with her best interest at heart either. elissavet's sire is... 'friends' isn't the correct term, but they know apollonnio & had business dealings with him prior to either party embracing a childe. elissavet's embrace was actually suggested by him, knowing how much tragedy her family had experienced in recent years tragedy which totally completely had Nothing to do with his meddling, none at all & knowing how the lasombra typically went about scouting candidates, it made sense.

he also saw it as an opportunity for future potential plans, knowing there was a solid chance he would be able to use this to his advantage some way in the future. it didn't take a lot of manipulation on his end to convince elissavet that her older sister had intentionally fucked over their family and that definitely shouldn't waste her time reaching out to kat in any capacity. elissavet may or may not have been privy to at least some of the abhorrent treatment kat was receiving at the time, which makes for a very 'interesting' discussion in the years following the events of bloodlines.

basically just a lot of betrayal and hurt feelings between the two lmao :')

elissavet was the youngest of the five sisters, & being the oldest, kat basically raised her after they lost their mother young. i think at some point, elissavet realizes how much she was used and manipulated, but won't broach the topic herself because she's quite frankly Terrified of her sister's reaction. she also feels that kat would be completely justified in feeling any type of rage towards her, because she took everything apollonnio said at face value & ergo was complicit in kat's abuse. realistically, was that a fight she could have won, had she tried to rescue her sister? probably not, but at least kat would have seen that she still had people who cared about her.

& as for how kat feels about her sister presently, it's really complicated, tangled up in so much pain she doesn't even know where to start unravelling it. on one hand, she knows what her sire was like, so she's not surprised and even a bit forgiving about the whole thing. in her head, elissavet was a victim too, just in a different form. on the other hand, kat finds herself sitting with real genuine grief about it. she can't help but wonder just what it is about her that makes her so easy to leave behind, if it's somehow her fault, if she didn't take good enough care of her sisters, if she somehow deserved all of this. somehow it evolves into a nasty spiral of self loathing.

but she also knows that would still be a way of letting her sire win. whether that's true or not is debatable, but that's how it feels. he took her away from her family, made her old life disappear and made her stand by and watch as her father & sisters scrambled to pick up the pieces. she still hasn't visited her father's grave and doesn't know if she ever can. if she stays mad at elissavet, she's losing that one final fragment of who she used to be. apollonnio and his bullshit will have completely severed those ties, and that would be just one more thing he took away from her.

so she's kind of a pushover when it comes to her sister. elissavet struggles to put aside decades of being told that kat intentionally abandoned them all, selfishly fleeing once she got tired of playing caretaker at home. keep in mind, elissavet never really had another mother figure, but her siblings did, so they never felt as gutted when kat disappeared. she spent a long time convinced that taking care of her was what drove kat away. incidentally, their current relationship's status varies wildly from one week to the next. elissavet ends up accidentally hurting kat often, not really able to properly process the reality that kat never wanted to leave them & she was used as a pawn in someone else's fucked up mind game. kat keeps allowing it, not wanting to be abandoned or give the impression that she's leaving elissavet again, not wanting to let her sire take something else away from her.

elissavet is... conditionally allowed to be around the rest of kat's coterie, shall we say lmao. they tolerate her presence because kat wants to be close to her again so badly, it's kind of sad to watch her keep putting her neck out there time and time again, only to have it all crumble after a misplaced word or two. skelter is by far the most cordial, content to just let her sit there and mind her own business. elissavet is keenly aware of her status here, so she does what she can to not rock the boat. damsel's grudgingly tolerant, especially after she ends up friends with kat, because it's a favour for someone she's come to care about. still, she finds it frustratingly paradoxical that kat is the only person who seems to be able to openly express distaste with elissavet, even if she kind of gets it at the same time. (kat appreciates the great amount of effort it takes for her to bite her tongue, don't kid yourself.)

nines is also very much letting this happen for kat's sake. he does Not like elissavet, doesn't like the cowardice she's exhibited before, and definitely doesn't like her habit of stirring the pot & then leaving when things start to get too heated. he absolutely understands why kat will put herself through the ringer for her sister, and thinks that if the roles were reversed–if he suddenly found out that one of his siblings had suffered the same fate as him–he'd also be bending over backwards to keep them around. of course, he has the added benefit of knowing none of them would ever end up working with someone so openly fucking Vile like apollonnio, so it'd be easier in that respect. he genuinely can't wrap his head around how elissavet could just be a bystander for all of that. kat hasn't told him everything that she's been through, but the bits and pieces he's heard are enough. to him, it doesn't matter what lines she was being fed, elissavet shouldn't have fucking done that. if kat ever decided she was 100% done with her sister and never wanted her near the vicinity again, he'd make it happen without a second thought. for now, though, her just kind of hovers whenever she's around. elissavet isn't going to try anything, it's just more of a silent reminder for her to try not to say anything stupid.

mitchell is ambivalent about her, honestly. they've met a handful of times, with elissavet avoiding the malkavian more than anything. it's pretty clear that she doesn't like how insightful mitchell can be, or how easily she reads her. elissavet has always preferred keeping her cards close to her chest, so someone who has an uncanny ability to see right through that is unnerving at best. mitchell also seems to be the one person who can get away with telling kat that her sister is a horrible person (is this because kat expects it from her, or because mitchell is a more objective opinion? we may never know the truth).

none of kat's other immediate family found themselves as kindred, and elissavet lost track of their other three sisters as time went on. she knows for certain that none of them stayed in new york after losing two siblings and their remaining parent, but beyond that, not much else. it's very possible that kat has some neices and nephews out there, but she tries not to give that too much thought because the idea of being removed from that hurts. they each use falsified surnames and swap them out every few decades for the sake of upholding secrecy, though kat is a little more lax with the timing these days. kat is far more sentimental than her sister, and far less adverse to physical contact. elissavet likes to pretend that she's unaffected, but one of the things she missed the most after kat disappeared was the easy way she would offer hugs & brush her hair well past childhood. reflexively, she finds herself opening her mouth to get on kat for smoking so much, since she's never liked the habit, but stops herself when she remembers that the cigarettes won't hurt anything at this point. despite it all, she misses the sound of kat's laugh. they aren't at the point where she's had many opportunities to do it (tears are more common), but she remembers it enough to know it was a sound of comfort.

#oc tag #katerina irakleidis #elissavet zervakis #i went into an essay there lmao

[justgayloringeverthrone]

(Anyways back to the point, as I said, Gale doesn't apologize with words but over time admits he was wrong with his actions. )

but that's my point he knows what he's doing what he did was wrong and he doesn't apologize or take accountability if someone does something s***** and don't apologize or take accountability or try to change your action it's not a good thing.

(second he doesn't push her into a relationship when she isn't ready, that would be Peeta, Gale saw she didn't want it and then backed off after he kissed her, she is the one who continued something romanticl.) okay I don't know how you keep thinking that Peeta pressured her into a relationship when he literally says this (. "Look, Katniss, I've been wanting to talk to you about the way I acted on the train. I mean, the last train. The one that brought us home. I knew you had something with Gale. I was jealous of him before I even officially met you. And it wasn't fair to hold you to anything that happened in the Games. I'm sorry." "There's nothing for you to be sorry about. You were just keeping us alive. But I don't want us to go on like this, ignoring each other in real life and falling into the snow every time there's a camera around. So I thought if I stopped being so, you know, wounded, we could take a shot at just being friends," he says.) also there's a fact that he literally gives her a lockit with Gale inside and again is willing to die to make sure she can have a life with him but oh sure he's the one pressing her into being a relationship tell me how does that make sense to you. and this is what Gale says this ("Tell me about it," I say. "If I could've just hated him in the arena, we all wouldn't be in this mess now. He'd be dead, and I'd be a happy little victor all by myself.:"And where would we be, Katniss?" asks Gale.)

and mind you this happens after katniss told him about not being able to be in a relationship because she's scared of being killed and her family being killed and after the quarter quell was announce again bringing up a romantic relationship in an inappropriate moment

(He didn't manipulate her.) yes he did because again he knew she was going to act to him being in pain he purposely made her feel guilty about not being with him romantically even though she told them she can't even think about this s*** right now and yeah he did stop but it wasn't because it was the right thing to do is because she wasn't kissing him the way he wanted to kiss her and that's the problem. He was insecure. He was jealous. (You can't say he manipulated her just because he loved her in a different way than Peeta. )yeah Peter did love her differently just in a better and healthier way because he didn't let his jealousy or insecurity stop him from putting katnisses emotional needs ahead of his own and that's why he's the better partner for her.

(Gale was a morally gray character. He wasn't perfect, nobody's saying that he is. But he was realistic and complex and different and he sure as hell was better than Peeta. His motives and actions are much deeper than even Katniss' so I understand how most people can't even comprehend how morally complex he was. )

okay yes he's a morally Great character and honestly I do like him as a character I just don't like his personality or makes katniss kind of feel like she owes him a relationship because they're like so many moments were she just feels bad about being with Peeta with even if it's just for her survival. and even though Gale is morally gray that doesn't mean he's a deeper character than Peeta. cuz Peter is more than just a love interest . one of my favorite Peeta lines is("I don't know how to say it exactly. Only. I want to die as myself. Does that make any sense?" he asks. I shake my head. How could he die as anyone but himself? "I don't want them to change me in there. Turn me into some kind of monster that I'm not." and katniss ask Do you mean you won't kill anyone?" I ask.

No, when the time comes, I'm sure I'll kill just like everybody else. I can't go down without a fight. Only I keep wishing I could think of a way to. to show the Capitol they don't own me. That I'm more than just a piece in their Games," says Peeta.) and in the beginning katniss doesn't't understand it but then she does when rude dies and realizes that rue and her are so much then competitors in a death match there are human beings worthy of compassion and that is what I love about Peeta he doesn't want to let the capital or his trauma change him into a monster and that's what makes his higjacking so much worse because he lived his worst fear. Peeta as a character is a reminder to katniss and the audience that it's important to stay true to who we are regardless of what happened. gale is sort of a cautionary tale of what happens when you let your trauma and your anger get the better of you and you end up doing something you regret. both characters are well written and deep and I think you can appreciate both characters and what they bring.

Okay honestly I can't with you anymore because you keep twisting the narrative into the favor of your purity culture, perfect German child boy aka Peeta to shame a brown boy who is just trying to survive and is admitting he isn't perfect aka Gale.

I'm not going to waste any more brain cells on this conversation just because you don't have any.

Now if you could just go to the hashtag "gale Hawthorne defense squad" blogs under that hashtag have already explained this and I don't feel like repeating them or myself.

#peeta mellark slander #gale hawthorne #gale hawthorne defense squad #jennifer lawrence #katniss everdeen #the hunger games

[thedawningofthehour]

What was the thing that made Draxum decide on kidnapping Donnie? I know that in your story he had been stalking him for months before he grabbed him but what was it about Donnie that made Draxum think HE would be the one worth all the time and effort? What has his thought process?

A big thing that fueled Draxum's change from the canon timeline to the doth one was realizing that what he was doing was Not Working. He did his mutation bullshit to get himself a mutant army. He doesn't have a mutant army. He poured himself into assembling the dark armor. He can't use it because it would all but kill him and wouldn't do what he needed it to do anyway. His plans had all failed so far.

Draxum's a realist. He could bitch and moan about the dark armor all day, could yell about how he could take over the surface with his army of mutants, but at the end of the day nothing would have changed. He doesn't have his dark armor, and he doesn't have his mutant army. That was reality. Nothing he did was going to change that.

What more, he realized that there was a lot he hadn't considered when first making his plans. The humans were way more technologically developed than he ever imagined, and there were just more people than he anticipated. It's one thing to know that there's eight billion people on Earth-it's something else to actually see how many people there were, in just New York itself, and know that it was a tiny fraction of everyone who lived on this rock. No elite team of warriors was going to be able to kill billions of humans. It just doesn't work that way.

He was going to have to approach this from a different direction. One that Draxum, canonically hundreds of years old and still calls his niece every time he accidentally disconnects from the internet, did not have experience with.

At this point he started thinking about Donnie. Donnie was the only one who held his own against Draxum in the first episode. Donnie and his inventions were what propelled the turtles' antics passed 'nuisance' into 'they need to be neutralized or they're going to fucking ruin everything.' And when his brothers stole Draxum's magic weapons, Donnie kept to his tech because he was more familiar and confident with it. That was exactly what Draxum needed.

(also Donnie is very much like Bella, who Draxum was very close to when she was a child but fought with a lot once she reached adulthood. He won't admit it, but he does miss her. Plus both she and Donnie are a lot like Draxum himself, so there's that)

As for why just Donnie, Draxum says it himself-it wasn't worth it to kidnap the other turtles. Draxum literally created them to be superweapons, they are dangerous. Bringing any of them onboard risked them killing him and/or sabotaging his operation. It just wasn't worth it for a single warrior.

Donnie was a hundred times more dangerous than any of his brothers, true. He could (and was demonstrably quicker to) kill just as easily as his brothers, and he was smart enough that he could absolutely ruin Draxum with no chance of him ever recovering, without Draxum ever seeing it coming until it had already happened. But Donnie was also a thousand times more useful than his brothers. He could build weapons that could kill far more humans in a minute than any one warrior could be expected to kill in their lifetime. His work was vital to the rebuilding effort-the rebuilding, Draxum had a lot of plans for that, but those too he realized would be insufficient. The other turtles, he'd have no use for them after the war was finished-which was fine, he just planned to have them integrate into Yokai society and let them live out their lives, but the fact that Donnie could remain useful to him past that point upped his value quite a bit in Draxum's eyes.

So yeah. Kidnapping Donnie was an incredibly risky, resource-intensive and time-consuming operation. Draxum considered him to be worth it. And that was before he knew he was getting a son out of the deal.

#doth #doth asks #baron draxum #donatello

[twopoppies]

Hey Gina, after yesterday 's DM incident I just had a few thoughts about it and maybe I'm late to it but still, I felt like I could rant here for a while because you're one of the oldest Larry blogs that I've been following, perhaps the first one since I joined Tumblr.

I've been a Larrie since 2014 and see, one thing all of us as a fandom know is that the boys don't owe a single thing to us, and that hurdles will be thrown our way and despite them, we have to understand it all and hold on.

We can never blame them for the hate and bullying all the young fans on the internet recieve on a daily basis because that's completely the fault of the people inflicting it and their own morals.

We've been told that our idols hate us, that we've ruined their friendship, been on the recieving end of death threats and been doxxed because of our fandom which is a horrible part of the internet, and yet we haven't been deterred for over a fucking decade where most fandoms would be because it's nothing compared to what the boys have gone through.

However I'm sure the boys are aware of our situation and it's obvious that their hands completely aren't tied anymore by strict contracts anymore like they used to be.

Yesterday's situation, Louis unfollowing HLD(one of the biggest Larry UAs around and I'm sure he knew that. The antis had a FIELD DAY with that one) and just all recent occurrences (and Holivia, to add insult to injury, which I know there's a reason for it but given the circumstances, it isn't looking good for us) kind of is putting me off. If yesterday's incident was real, I'm afraid to say this but I'm deeply disappointed.

H and L are happy, I want to believe, they never do and never have owed us any "proofs" or any activity whatsoever as long as their own well being is ensured, they could take a break for years, they could take as much time as they want, after all they're humans like all of us and they're in sticky situations in a fucked up industry and we should understand that.

But at the end of the day, they're celebs with a platform and when there's people fighting for your expression for so many years and standing behind you, all these young people that have seen the worst of the internet, the last thing you do is add salt to the wound and act this way towards them, confirming exactly what the antis tell us.

Ignore us, of course you won't be able to acknowledge us at this point, we'll keep showing our support for you, but H and L need to understand that warding off such a huge part of your fandom is not a good move and it disheartens people for a reason. Realistically speaking, it's hard to still stay firm in your foundation after all this regardless of whatever prior incidents might suggest, I found myself doubting Larry for the first time in 8 years due to recent occurrences, if Louis' team thinks they're going the right direction with this, they're wrong.

I'm always careful not to do anything that makes my favs uncomfy and the way these things have played out, a lot of people are unlarrying simply because they think H and L might not want us to be doing this. That's all.

Hi sweetheart. I really agree with what you’re saying. If he felt the need to confirm that Freddie is his kid, for whatever reason, it could have been done without bringing Larry into it. So yeah, they owe us nothing. But at the same time, they have to be aware of how this sort of thing deeply affects people.

This doesn’t make me doubt Larry, but it does make me question why I’m wasting time here.

#babygate

[liliththunder]

I wanted to write this post a while now, because I see a lot of posts, which made me think about this topic a lot.

I don't think Vegas and Pete are particularly into hurting eachother while having sex or when Vegas tortures Pete that Pete thinks it's attractive.

I only judge from what I see on screen, but except from the chained hands I don't see much that could hint into S&M. Quite the opposite, while KinnPorsche sex looks steaming hot, it has a gentleness to it.

Here is what I think:

Vegas, who has a problem with trusting people, since never anyone trusted him (especially his father) fells in love with someone, who gives him a prove of absolute trust -binding Pete's hands up- a sign that Pete trusts him in doing everything right to him. He won't interfere with his doing.

In my opinion, Pete isn't someone who likes to be hurt, but he shut up all feelings inside himself to always smile for others. Vegas brings out the worst in him, brings him to the point, where he no longer is able to cover everything with a smile. But it is also like a salvation. He starts to feel again. In the sex scene, he let his feelings, he lets another person take over his feelings. Which is much for a person, who controlled all his feelings in sake for others.

So for me in this scene it's rather than hurt comfort.

Later on, Pete can't show his true feelings, his hurt and weak face to Porsche, because Pete is a person, who is the one to depend on not the other way around. He can't change that for nothing.

The reason why Vegas fell in love with Pete is I think well explored. But I also think, that when Vegas said: "Everytime I am moody, I see in your eyes that you like it." It's true, because not only Pete shows his most pathetic face to Vegas, but also Vegas starts to show his weak face, which is an immense trust. Given Pete's personality, I think this is the part he is really driven to. The Vegas he can support, he can make smile, because Vegas lets him.

They both feel when they have seen darkness. Both tried to hide their deep down wounds, one with cruelty, one with naive brightness. But this is something they could only show after being hurt.

Pete were the symbol of Vegas' failure and the reason his dad was mad at him.

Vegas were the person, who tried to hurt Pete's beloved master and his (best) friend.

This is the reason of the hurt in the beginning, but I don't think, it's the reason they love each other. Only a causality.

Also what I like about VegasPete is that there are so many nameless and complicated feelings, it's not as easy as like or don't like. It's far more than that, far more interesting of a story to be told.

KinnPorsche is at one point, 'yeah, we are in love, but sometimes we get for X reason jealous', which gets boring and predictable.

What if Porsches childhood trauma make him hurt Kinn? And he can't understand why, because Porsche can't communicate about this. It would be much more realistic. As writers, we know at all times, what each of our characters are feeling, but we forget, that we have to be several separate people at the same time. People in real life are not always understandable, not always considered. But would make it a good story, is how they solve their problems nonetheless.

If we get a second season, I hope they explore KinnPorsches relationship more in that way, because keeping a relationship is hard not to lose sight of the other person. Not to hurt eachother unconsciously, which human most likely do.

As for VegasPete although they are on the way to better, they are not done yet. Overcoming hurt is a journey going back and forth. Such as someone wrote, 'they chose each other' I want to see that again in a second season, because that makes them a very good couple of realistic written characters.

#vegaspete #vegas theerapanyakul #pete phongsakorn #kinnporsche #kinnporche the series #vegas x pete

[hanarinhightown]

ok wait i just finished garrus's loyalty mission - i stopped him from shooting sidonis bc i want him to be happier in me3 but tbh it felt very eeeh in the moment, like shepard wasnt respecting his decision or sth - - what's your take on the garrus mission?

hi anon, thank you for the question!!

so first of all, i think it heavily depends on your shepard's personality and the way you perceive their relationship to their crew/garrus in particular. but i absolutely see your point here and i have a lot of friends who feel this way -- in fact, i have a friend who actually thought until i told them otherwise that the only way to win garrus's loyalty at all was by letting him take the shot, because if you intervened, he would obey, but he wouldn't really trust you. because you made his decision for him which just meant he never really processed it.

and the game does sort of frame it that way, even if that's obviously not what they intended. i don't think what we get is bad as an option, but i would have liked it better if shepard's actions could be more intentionally just... stalling a bit. like, if shepard and garrus are close, they can see that this maybe isn't what will give garrus closure in the long run, so they are just trying to make him stop and think and come to a decision on his own -- whatever that may be -- instead of either letting him impulsively take the shot, or forcing him not to. ultimately garrus does say in some cases "just go. tell him to go." but it's heavily influenced by shepard being like "yeah look at this pathetic already-dead man," and i would have liked a little more heavy lifting from garrus's personal struggle with it (which is to say nothing of brandon keener's phenomenal delivery in the scene) rather than shepard's moralizing. which can come across as just odd -- especially given that shepard actually knows very little about what happened with archangel, because garrus is being (perhaps understandably) less than emotionally available at the beginning of ME2 -- when shepard might spend the whole game killing people for lesser offenses.

but again i think that depends on who your shepard is. and who garrus is at this point in your trilogy play-through (for me a lot of this also hinges on my own understanding of garrus's personal development between ME1 and ME2). but in general, regardless of my personal feelings about sid, i do like the writing better if you save him. it feels less abrupt and more realistic to see garrus still struggling with it a little in the aftermath (even if that disappears once you get back to the normandy, but that goes for most if not all of the loyalty missions to some extent)

as for me, i have a weird relationship to mass effect canon because there's the way i play the games, and then there's the way i personally perceive my canon, and there's overlap but not completely (mostly because of sidonis, to be fair), so i just sort of take the whole thing with a grain of salt and...embellish the truth. i tend to play it in the way i've described above, where shepard can see it's eating garrus up inside, and killing sidonis won't make him feel better, but shepard knows he needs to make the decision on his own to even begin any sort of process of closure. and for me he ultimately does decide to let sidonis go, although whether that's an ethical stance he's taking or an emotional one where he just can't go through with it when he finally has sid in his scope is up for interpretation for me still, because i don't think even garrus would be able to answer that, and he's got a long way to go before he actually processes the whole thing. so i do really like "eye for an eye," but i kind of see it as more of an opening-up of a wound so it can heal again correctly, rather than the stitches that close the wound and close the case, if that makes sense?

#anon #khel babbles #lantar sidonis #sidposting

[bylertruther]

I’m not trying to argue I’m actually asking here but Nancy also got the “can’t say I love you” storyline w Steve though didn’t she? in her case she was physically attracted to Steve and actually liked him romantically but just wasn’t in love with him. Couldn’t that be the case for Mike too? I think we all know he’s not actually in love with El but that doesn’t mean he never even had a crush on her.

you're being friendly and respectful, so i don't take this as you trying to argue. don't fret!

nancy did, but does everything have to be the exact same? even the parallels that we do have when it comes to relationships are similar but not exact. what brought mike and el together is also vastly different from what brought steve and nancy together—the nature of their relationships and their approaches to romance are even more dissimilar as well.

either way, that could totally be the case for mike. i prefer gay mike because i feel it especially represents the story of many who have battled with heteronormativity, denial, and the inner turmoil that causes, but i'd be happy with him being any flavor of lgbt.

"the first i love you" playing while el kisses him and tells him she loves him in front of an open closet as he plays clueless and frozen, as well as the one way sign and how he becomes a "shitty knockoff" in lenora, the mention of sodomy in eddie's speech, how he never once has said ily, how he's always likening her to family even in the first time he said ily, how he calls her superMAN, how he can't list anything about her actual personality when talking about her and what he likes about her all make me feel like .... idk. it's deeper than just not loving someone like that. if he had a crush on her, why can't he say anything about her? why is it always about her powers? why does she have to be superior? why is he paralleled to her parental figures CONSTANTLY? why does he tell her she'd be his sister in s1? why is it that he IS good at communicating his emotions and conflict resolution, but only when it comes to will? why is he only capable of doing everything that people push him to do for el when it comes to will? why is it so effortless with will but it's pulling teeth and superficial when it comes to her? if the point is that he does like her like that, but he just doesn't love her? why does he feel like he'd lose her if the issue is that he does like her, but he just doesn't love her yet or feel ready to say it YET? why is he so scared that they won't even be able to be friends anymore if they already HAVE broken up and it's not like they became mortal enemies after?

like yeah he said it's because he was afraid that day would hurt more, but why can't he be emotionally available with her anyway? why are their scenes always/usually lighthearted compared to byler's romantic and serious tone? why do they never have a genuine and emotional heart to heart or a serious conversation if they do like each other but don't love each other?

like. where is the real deal serious romance. it's not like mike was incapable of that, because season three shows him, as i said, doing everything right with will but not with her. he does have the capacity and the intelligence, he just doesn't show that with her. and it's like... if he does like her like that... why not show it? in a serious way, not just making out in your room from dusk till dawn but never actually talking to each other? why is he a shitty knockoff and not being himself? why is HE the one always facing homophobic comments directly that are specifically aimed at homosexual men?

mike can be anything and we won't know for a while, but i just see a lot of myself reflected in him and i know that his experience is especially realistic for many men and women out there, especially those that lived in his era in such a conservative place and family. when i say i prefer gay mike, i'm not making a statement that everyone else is dumb and wrong for not agreeing. that's just what i think, because they could've played the "i genuinely like her romantically As A Person And Individual" much better than they did in s4 but they didn't. again, i don't care at the end of the day as long as he isn't straight lol. we can all think whatever we want, we should just be wary of the things that we say and use as support for our headcanons or speculation.

#asks

[bubblyshortie]

oh i see you finished 2521... well you see the ironic thing we found that they wanted to do this whole "realistic" thing but the main couple who literally formed a deep connection and understanding and bond before they were even together, talked through things... just somehow couldn't make their distance work at the time?? but also how is it realistic for them not to end up together but the couple that got together based off vanity got married and endgame like?? lmfao. yeah i didn't like the ending. i enjoyed it until ep 14. the last 2, they can keep. you can't show me the whole series that they are capable of understanding each other on that level and end it like that. the scene of them crying holding on to each other, they legit did not want to let go. in the end, it was the writers who desperately wanted to fit this weird narrative and had to make them act out of character for it to work. i legit enjoyed the show and its lessons but that was not one of them. plus, if they actually wanted me to believe heedo moved on and accepted it, why is everything around her a reminder of yijin? the colored chairs, the naming of her daughters ballet shoes where she wrote on it like yijin did her sword, her face when she hears his name... like? the problem i had with this personally is, when two people like /them/ like that.. with respect and understand of another, i dont see this ending being realistic in any way /for them/ like ive been in a bad relationship where the communication wasnt there etc & the basic opposite of those two and he was my first love and its more realistic for us not to have worked out and we didnt. but THEM? no.. i won't accept it and i would never accept this ending *sigh* sorry saw ur post and something made me angry all over again. the show def has replay value though i watch it when i want to feel encouraged like heedo or find my way again like yijin. i'll never forget those lessons, but i will forget the ending.

dude, the fact that i never thought about this point of view, but i agree with everything you said... like, you opened a whole new door for me and i will gladly get in

you made a really good point right there, so im afraid i wont be able to add up more into the argument

but, i want to highlight what you said about them not being the kind of couple that would end up like that. exactly!!! their characters were designed in a way in which it doesn't make sense they didn't end up together. almost as if the screenwriters spent more time justifying why they're meant for each other, instead of making up good reasons of why they had to break up

portraying how couples, as much as they can love each other, may not be together forever is a worthy lesson, someone's gotta talk about it!! that's what's more common between real people! and it's okay!!! but they didn't do it right in this story. they could've shown a couple with more downs than with ups, a couple that maybe didn't try enough, etc. but these guys, heedo and yijin, prioritized communication, naturally understood each other, they tried so hard because they loved each other and they chose to love each other every single day

the main difference between yijin and heedo's mom's actions is that yijin did tried. for instance, if he ever couldn't arrive at time, he would go to her house anyway... and heedo was truly okay with that because she understood him and they appreciated each other's effort no matter what. that was until the screenwriters remembered they were supposed to break up.

that last hug showed how the characters didn't want to break up, that reason wasn't worth-breaking-up enough for them

so, yeah

sigh

#answered #mine #my post #txt post #reviews #ask me #25 21 #twenty five twenty one #kdrama #kdramas #25 21 spoilers #2521

[saltypiss]

The problem with bringing Conker's Bad Fur Day back is that it's got nothing in gameplay to offer on it's own, and today's standards can hardly keep the game up with modern times.

What people really want, is the artistry, voices, and characters. That, is what kept people playing. Hardly anyone truly thinks "oh yeah that was a fun moment" they're usually pissed off at the controls.

Live and reloaded proved to the world two things, refining isn't enough sometimes, and artistry really fucking matters. A more realistic depiction certainly helps to show the graphical differences between last gen and now, but it completely destroyed the artistry. The pure black darkness for shading, the bright but battered looking characters, everyone speaks like there's wood stuck in their throat.

You can write a book on how to make a mature cartoon look good with Conker's Bad Fur Day. You can show that even though everyone in the game is unlikable in personality, they're lovable as characters. You can show that voice direction matters in subtle ways, that to this day, aren't matched or tried to be.

But for gameplay? Honestly, they got the B button. And weighty but generic platforming. In terms of how Conker animates while moving, again, could write a whole book based on just how he leans bounces, drunkenly walks, etc. It feels amazing at points.

But again, really, for a game designer, what does Conker have to offer that hasn't or wasn't done better? What can you change without it being a different game?

What I really think people should do when 'demanding' a sequel to CBFD is to heavily focus on the characters and artistic values of the original game, while acknowledging it's short-comings in gameplay.

Now, all that being said, it's not like the gameplay is poor, or that it's got no value, genuinely the gameplay could only work within that world. It didn't need anything extra or fancy, it sold itself on charm and that charm is what has kept it around the public consciousness for as long as it has.

But. Plain and simple. CBFD isn't able to come back. In title alone it can. But if you watch through the entire developer commentary on YouTube, you'll come to realize, that game being created was an absolute crapshoot, had 0 realistic chance of coming into the world of the time.

The crew behind it not only won't come back, but even if they did, they wouldn't have the same mentalities.

Here's a good story that I think can show this angle best. One of the discussions they had was that the fart sounds were real, and reminisced about one of them just taking the mic and farting into it.

They also discussed how just having a group of people who mutually respect each other is incredibly healthy for a game's development, that you can throw any big name developer at a concept and it won't always be great, they themselves admit they were hardly a great dev team, just a good team.

And that is what the whole game feels like. A buncha twats shooting the shit, turning that shit into a world with life and substance, and then making a game out of it.

Honestly, without that, the game would've been shit. You can't hand the blueprints for CBFD to anyone and expect them to recreate it. But for a brief period of history in game development, there was this one group, who were allowed, somehow, to turn their child friendly violentless game, into what is still the most crude experience anyone will experience.

It can't come back.

That's not even getting into PC culture, the differences in hardware that enabled the artistry to be so grand and timeless, the fact that all it's humor was derided from the fact that for gaming, all the crudeness was incredibly unheard of. So unheard of it wasn't advertised by Nintendo and hidden behind the counters of porn stores. It sold 60k units.

This is what indie development feels like to some degree sometimes, except with professionals with budgets.

Timeless and yet not. It exists between console generations and was one of if not the last for the n64. The whole game feels like it narrowly made it's way into this timeline. It's a one of a kind experience, once in a lifetime chance, for sure.

#conker's bad fur day

[incarnateirony]

Talking to another true aged Thoth dedicant is fascinating. One, he believes every word of what I've told him, because it falls into what he experienced, but also is aware how this falls into much larger motions.

While ironically I am, within a roving egregore, in a moving demiurge state, I'm not even the only person doing that. Shit, people been doing that since the dawn of time. But when I say these are generational damages across metempsychosis/transmigration, I mean it. Shea's shit is rotten several lifetimes deep, and impacts very widely as a result, and is a Peak Whore Of Babylon type to be eradicated tis cycle, but she's like, not the only one, and this dude is both aware of that but also, after talking to me, fully cognitive on why she's fucking me up so bad.

Like, yeah, that tracks. Hard enough to keep your hat on through and after that, and this cycle has a helluva setup going on asrologically that would probably make you boogaloo all on its own, but add in the world's dumbest stalker--what'd you call her, crackbear lilith?--and yeah, someone made the Universe snap on them.

Yeah. And now the universe is processing her out if she refuses to budge this time.

He's sooo much like me, defines as a Khaote, avoids formal lodges.

Meanwhile crackbear's out here clinging to my old romance playlist for roleplay mixed in with my new great hits and her emo pining, to draw variants of my shit, mostly my shadow block, to hump as a coping body pillow for what she can't face she chose to lose, and refusing to read any books, cuz they will also point out the same things, and it's better for her to hide her eyes from the truth, in her head. Like goddamn it took 2 solid weeks to pull her off the anime octopus jibberish halfway, at least on her blog title, and then she ran to be crackbear. She has no direction, path, reason, method, nothing, she just has what she wants to play barbie in now.

She's been fucking people up for her own ego since Vesuvius. And earlier probably. Not sure why Hermes tried to have faith she'd change now.

Did you know the greeks believed volcanic eruptions came from Tartarus? Funny story.

There were over 111 earthquakes in yesterday's 24 hour period alone, not counting what the eclipse will bring. Our realistic Schumann Resonance with appropriate magnifier is at almost 300 and expected to climb. We're under intense solar winds, only half generated from the sun itself and large portions appearing opposite, coming from Somewhere Else. Radiation is peaking, the aurora is having a disco, the world is shaking, prophets are singing my song that I've never met, and she's still picking her nose and denying everything going on around her when it reads like a fucking book narrative, just deadass able to be followed point to point. One she should even remember, from internet breaks, chat GPT and other AI screams, to our entire solar and other astrological configuration and events. But if she acknowledges that, then she has to acknowledge the other shit.

Yeah man, you made Coyote hate you, and it's all your own fault, process it. Now be honest. All the way. And let us go. All the way. If he decides to return to you then so be it, but let's not pretend he'll fly right back to your window after all this heartless caging. Much less if you continue to refuse the work.

It's time, Shea. You're not a little girl anymore, stop acting like a witch who just found her first "turn into a cat" mewmew rhyme spell on webcrawler.

What you are experiencing is the horrifying realization that for all those years, I was right. And it takes work, effort, and learning. I never force anyone down one specific path, but you tried to force yourself down mine without wanting to actually do it, just ride on my back. I've learned enough to teach dozens of paths, even if they aren't mine, to send people on their way, and you won't even be assed to learn a single one, just play "I'm special cuz I talk to spirits (shadows)" and "om nom nom reeses cups for the gods" with a touch of "feeling nostalgic, gonna pretend I'm not roleplaying to my ex's top jams on his face trying to recreate him." and like. that's it sweetie. That's what you've got.

You literally have to unpack that. You do that? You'll be more powerful than you'll ever know. Give yourself ten years uninterrupted on that path and you, too, may be possessing random idiots like your current self to holler about your shit into the internet because they open door themselves like you do. But right now, you can't even cast a beginner spell. Not really. You can put together parts you read in a recipe but understanding and thus willing its function, no you fuckin don't, miss "tried to summon an archangel and just threw a tiny aaron shadow @ aaron--why is he just laughing and throwing it back at me??"

Because you have no power here. Your heart is in nothing you own, and it certainly isn't with YHVH's path, and you lead people from the path to providence, and there is a millstone reserved for you with him, especially as you cling to your shadow serpents. That's why, Shea.

Your words give life meaning and shape. And until you reach attainment, you can't copy my words. You don't understand them or the state of being or the path that rendered them. You have zero actual UNDERSTANDING, just antithetical mimicry. So, those words give me meaning in your life. Those portraits you convinced others to draw, or drew yourself, those give me power in your life. Every compulsive prayer or offering--frankly every stubborn attempt to reblog hermes to prove something. Am I Hermes? No, but you've wholy attached him to me in your head, hence the renderings you convinced others of, so like. Cool, you reblogged a classic Hermes, I see you're still on your shit with no individual vision?

Your words. Give. Life. Meaning. And if you want to have a meaning in life that isn't defined by me, my shadows, or you spinning in circles of denial, your first words need to be to yourself, and to that shadow lady. And to apologize. To Athena. And reach out and take her hand, and help her out first, and say you're sorry. "You're me." But you gotta understand it Shea. And she's just part of that screaming lady. To be honest, to Mark and anyone else you've fucked up with this. And to apologize to at least Hermes, since I'm still convinced you'll never apologize to me no matter what you've done to me, you've thoroughly dehumanized me in your head to the point transphobia is free.

We've done what we can to help Athena but you have to do SOMETHING. YOU HAVE TO MOVE THE BOX, SHEA.

Hey. Shea.

...Ever wake up from a dream with real weird narrative consistency?

I know you like centering yourself in all things, and while it is literally applicable to you, I do actually mean it about myself.

I did. Took a few dozen bullets to the head and zipping through timelines to find a hat I could save, but I did, okay?

That's what you're fucking off with and refuse to admit.

I really like it here. I just want to be in the game, in peace, but you won't let me, so now we're ending it.

It's time to start facing how deep over your head you are, how large the workings against you are, and how committed I am. It's time to face that this is real. And it's time to cough up my fucking Air Jordans. Because I just need one fucking person to believe me. And that person is you. The metaphorical shoes, madam.

I swear there's some books somewhere about what happens when someone that completes a mystic path dies but doesn't die. IDK, you probably never read any of those. Maybe imagine Jack sparrow in Davey Jones' locker, and when he comes back all the other Jacks are still there, and summarily fuck up anybody else in the locker, and the real secret is, you're all in the motherfucking locker. We're off the edge of the track-map mate, did you think I was kidding?

#what was it you said? #listen to the lyrics?

[caelusarchetype]

· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·

They are between fourteen and forty, a group of women with rifles made of frozen mercury. They are activists who fight on two fronts, the aftermath and the dead hand. No one agrees with them except themselves, and no one tries to stop them.

Once, the roads were lined with red lights on the sides. Those who pass through those lines are prisoners sentenced to walk the world until their artificial legs stop working. It was designed to make sure the immortals suffer. Like Sisyphus, to keep on doing something meaningless without rest.

But then people kept spreading that Sisyphus is happy, so the so-called punishment lost its use in due time. It didn't stop though, only that those forced into a death march for the rest of their lives got a few privileges, like being able to eat while walking, love while walking, and rest while walking.

Alone, in a dark opera house, a woman pours her heart out dancing ballet. Clones of her watch her, as these clones need to memorize her movements and expressions to be the best ballet dancers they need to be. This woman won't be going home poor tonight.

A red eye-shaped scanner is embedded where her irises are supposed to be. She was told that if she were to accept the deal of being the model ballet dancer for posterity, she may have an artificial dream world before death. Ten seconds will be one hundred years-- they will create for her an almost immortal-like simulation for her to live on once she dies in the real world. Her eye is what will let her access to that technology.

On the other hand, an organization known as the Bullet Sorority started forming around that time. They are radicals that believe no one will be able to change anything without drastic measures that will make them care about the world such as terrorism, death, and pestilence. The Bullet Sorority is currently recruiting members in preparation for the first phase, which is to free all the immortal criminals from their Death march. One of the people they let in is a man in a woman's body, wishing to be free since a long time ago. Yet today, only by disgustingly spitting out to these people "I am a woman too" can he, he thinks, create a change in the world.

He held a rifle for the first time, and he pointed it at a sister. Then, he pointed it at the people, yelling commands in exchange for their meager lives, supported by the machines inside their bodies. He followed the leader's commands. When the time came, he was one of those who pulled the plug that disabled the red lines on the sides of the roads.

The Sorority did not expect that these immortals would not want to be free from their chains. Even after the red lines were gone, they kept walking, as it was what they knew their entire lives. The immortals tried to explain themselves to the sorority, and of course, the women could beat them in any debate. The sorority then demanded that the immortals should help them, as they did help them although they can't see it yet. Of course, most of the immortals adamantly refused. The radicals did what they did best, and through a show of force and moral dilemmas they got the immortals to join their cause.

It is about this time wherein the ballet dancer was about to lose her life. Her back was open in the operating room. When the surgeons told her the situation is impossible, she told them to take her to an address-- where the machine was located. The machine makes the minutes before death feel like an eternity.

What she didn't know is that the surgeon is a part of the sorority, and investigated her for this exact purpose. For years they've been trying to create a replica of that before-death technology, wanting to configure it to be their hideout, and so that learning times would be shortened as years would become seconds. But no matter what they do, they couldn't access it. Now is the golden chance. This woman is leading them directly to technology.

Yeah, but let's be realistic here. Of course, it doesn't work. The sorority will be unable to replicate this technology and this woman will be able to enjoy her immortality until she begins to feel the existential dread. So let's go forth to the other ink blot in the timeline.

That's cute. Very cute. Yes, very much so. They are keeping secrets from each other now. Let's give him a name. Acacia. Aca. Good. On their backs they sprayed the hail of many countries, cultures. When history begins to write itself again with the fingers of tired, hardworking, sleep-derived scribes, they will be hated for erasing so much of what has happened, manipulating the plot to suit their morality. Acacia will take care of it.

Are they successful? It's a work in progress. It's a never ending WIP. They fight with frozen mercury, and they fight in the world as well in living simulations to strengthen their future power. The moon might as well implode in their hands. Still, the sorority stays as passionate and opinionated as ever. It's about time for them to be fragmented. Time causes generals to turn into specifics or rebels. Through time, Acacia himself becomes one of those who have a lot of people under his wing, waiting for the right opportunity to get out.

And he has a way out. it's the same before-death technology. Imperfect, yes, prototypal. Acacia jumped on it the first moment he got. Did he return? No, but that's good. He tried to convince others to join in an immortal world where they can complete their goals.