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sgt-scottymoreau · 5 months

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Alliances - Part 2

Summary: They all say there's a begining to everything. They also say that when the opportunity present itself, you should take it. After a terrorist slip throw her hands, she found herself need of foreign help. Call it faith or dumb luck, but this is how Scotty would describe how she got to meet the 141.

Warning: None, probably lot of military innacuracy and other things like that, but we are here for the fun not the realism :P

Word: 6.3k // Part 1 // AO3 // Masterlist

A/N: This will be a two part because no way I'm post 11k fic in one post here lol But the A03 version is the full fic no cut.

Price was pissed that this went sour as it did. They just have to hope that the fire that started after the explosion was able to cover up most of the papers related to the terrorists. News would be talking, they didn't need the public to worry and even less Lambert to figure they were after him. Which so far seems like he did. A question that everyone wondered about; how? He was not aware that Scotty had followed him all the way here, as far as they knew, he probably bet on the fact that she had no way to come after him to be moved to England. In theory, he would never have been aware of her current position and he should be in custody by now.

Scotty was out of the infirmary with her shin bandaged and ready to return on the field. Her shoulders were painful, but nothing she couldn’t handle. She walked towards Price's office for a debriefing on what just happened, when she spotted Ghost ahead. She quickened her pace to catch him. "Thanks for the save back there, sir." She thanked him. Scotty knew it was his job, but it never hurt to be nice.

"Don't mention it." He replied not even looking at her. They walked in silence together after that as they were both heading the same direction and room.

Price was at his desk, face in his hands. He had to think carefully of their next step of action. He lifted his gaze only when the door closed behind Scotty. Soap and Gaz were already there, also rattling their brains on what could have happened. Price let out a sigh and shifted in his seat. “The only connection we had with Lambert is death, all proof except for the map Scotty took are considered gone. We need more than that if we want to find him.”

“What about the file she brought?” Gaz referred to the papers she shared about the recent activities on the first briefing.

“Despite being recent activities, none of them connect to the current situation. At least not from the first glance of the map.” She said almost defeated. “However, I have much more information on his older activities on the BSF database. If I could just retrieve it, we might be able to work out something.”

That sounded like the exact kind of good news they needed to hear. Price offered his seat so she could potentially login. Scotty found her way quickly on the Belgian Silent Force personnel only website. In a matter of minutes she was in, full access to all the reports she made and current work. “That’s odd.” She muttered. Price wondered what she meant, but Scotty didn’t reply. Her face changed from calm to concerned. She quickly scrolled up and down, fast and then slow. Her eyebrows frowned at each rolling movement. Even tried the search option. Yet, nothing came up. She let out a swear in French which took everyone by surprise.

“Sorry.” She smiled. “But, I can’t find the dossier anymore. All that I had on Lambert is gone… Fuck it was all here before I left! How the fuck did it all vanished!”

“Either someone had access to the system or internal help?” Gaz tried.

“That’s the only two options. First one is very worrisome while the second… I had this man under the radar for a while, nothing he did escaped me and I never saw if he had no connection with the inside.”

Scotty groaned with frustration. This was getting ridiculous. Since she teamed up with the 141, it felt like everything that could go wrong was and she felt like an idiot. Price was leaning above her shoulder looking at the screen, thinking that maybe she just missed it; nothing. Scotty glanced quickly at the captain to try to see what he was thinking. A neutral concerned face. Her eyes then followed the lieutenant who was in front. He had his arms crossed and despite the mask, she could feel his glare. Great, he was probably thinking she was a waste of time, exactly what she needed… The other two sergeants were as concerned as the captain.

But not all hope was lost. While 141 would examine the map and draw conclusions, Scotty would try to make some call back home. The file might have disappeared, but maybe someone could help her trace it back. Considering this fact, she should also notify her superior to be on the lookout for any suspicious activities. Pacing up and down the hallway as she called a colleague, her brain was restless. She missed something, something that could cost the life of many now that it seemed that Quds Force were also involved. A name that didn’t go unnoticed by Price. This small fact changed everything. It meant that if Lambert was working with them the risk of a bigger disaster was high. Added to this the military grade armament they found, they had to act quick. Gaz was the first one to point at the marked locations on the map connected all to one central point; Lambert’s ex company HQ. The one Soap and Scotty just infiltrated. The possibility of another bombing or hostage event was most probable if they followed the man’s pattern. One location actually matched the port the captain had been in. Reinforcing his theory. Their train of thoughts was disrupted as they heard a voice rise in the hallway, in a language they were not used to.

“Sir! Please even without all of this we are still close enough to get him! …. No! I refuse! I do not care if it’s an order! … Give me two more days! …. Fuck, yes sir. Sorry sir.” When Scotty returned inside, she was greeted by the four men looking at her. “What?”

“What was that about?” Soap asked before anyone else could.

“That was hmm… my commander on the phone.” She grimaced. “He said that I’m wasting my time and should return to base.”

“Didn’t catch everything, but that didn’t sound like a calm conversation.” Price smirked. Scotty rubbed the back of her neck with a nervous laugh.

“I would be surprised if you know Dutch, sir. But indeed… it wasn’t. Nothing to worry about really. What did you find? On my side, nothing could be done to find the lost data, it was worth the shot.”

Price explained their findings and the plan from there. Because of the spread out operations, they would have to work with more than just five. Price could call the SAS to get agents positioned at the designated places. However this had to be done without anyone knowing they were being watched. The death of Goldberg will already put them on alert, no reason to alert them more. If they know, they will disappear. The cities had enough CCTVs cameras around that the task force could request help to keep an eye on any sight of Lambert. The 141 and Scotty would be stationed near the HQ. Because of a lack of information on the time and date, they would have to stand outside and be ready at any moment. Price, Soap and Gaz will be wandering around the building, disguised as civilians. And because of Scotty's involvement before, she would have to remain on overwatch with Ghost. If Lambert sees her, he would most likely call off any operation he had planned. For now, the captain ordered his team to take a rest while he did make some calls. They had, according to numbers found on the map, only one day to prepare everything.

Scotty tried her best to sleep the rest of the night, but her mind was restless. The more she thought about what was unfolding, the more it felt like she was missing a big piece of the puzzle. The one that would explain all the bullshit that was going on since she landed in England. She berated herself for being so careless and to provide botched intel. Eventually Scotty fell asleep, but wasn’t rested when the first ray of the sun timidly showed up in the foggy morning. Her brain was still rattling to connect the dots even now, it was exhausting. Vaguely remembering where the mess hall was, Scotty made her way there to grab something to eat. On her way there, she spotted Soap and Ghost in a lounge room, sipping their coffee in peace. At least Soap was. She greeted them.

“How was sleeping?” Soap smiled. Without even asking, he poured her a cup and handed it.

She returned the smile and grabbed the mug. It tasted bitter! She usually drowns her coffee with sugar and milk. “As good as you can have when you can’t stop thinking.”

“If your intel was good from the start, we wouldn’t be there.” Ghost dropped casually. No accusation in his tone, but still could hear some annoyance.

“Excuse me?” She raised an eyebrow. He stood up, the chair loudly creaking under him.

“Let’s say you leave a bad first impression. Everything is going to shite since you arrived. I have seen better recon specialists, much better.” He didn’t mince his words. He grabbed his mug, walked to the sink to dump whatever was left and walked out the room without more. Scotty was speechless. Frowning like she just had been insulted, which yes was the case, she turned to Soap who was casually sipping his drink.

“What the fuck is his problem?” She dropped once her brain had fully reseted.

“None, he is always like this. Don’t take it personally. On the fields you can count on him no matter what, but outside? It takes him a while to warm up to people.”

It was true that she had only met them only a day or two ago. She couldn't really expect them to all be as welcoming as… She snorted. Technically, the other three operatives had been welcoming. Price as a captain probably hadn’t many choices. Soap and Gaz could have been jerks, but no they had been quite nice. Only Ghost seemed to have issues with her. He was right in a sense that she didn’t give the best first impression. But how could she have predicted that all of this would go from bad to worse?

Eventually in the late morning, early afternoon, the task force was called in the briefing room. Agents from the SAS, CCTV agencies and other military personnel were seated to listen as to what their task would be. Scotty was put under the spotlight when it came to explain which man they were after. Not that she minded it wasn’t the first time she had to speak to an audience. Once everyone was clear on their task, it was time for the real thing.

Stationed in an old building across the HQ, Scotty looked through the scope. They had set up a stakeout last night so they would be ready as soon as the working crowd would start to flood in. The street wasn’t too busy once the 8 to 9 hour rush passed, she easily spotted the three men who scouted the surrounding area.

“Roger that, 0-7 out.” Ghost replied to the radio and let out a sigh. “Don’t lose sight of anyone will you?”

Scotty hummed an answer, not even wanting to bother. Her eyes followed Gaz for a moment, she warned him about a suspicious individual at his 3 o’clock. It turned out to be nothing. Four hours went by and no sign of either Lambert or Quds Force. Had they been tipped off again about what was going on? No. This time she didn’t even take the time to inform her commander of what was happening. Too focused on finally catching the man.

“CCTV 5-896 here.” A voice came through. “Back of the building, emergency exit on the north-east side, there’s someone matching Lambert's description.”

Finally some good news! Price ordered Gaz to come with him through the back. Soap had to enter the building with Ghost providing cover. Scotty would remain on the lookout for anything else suspicious. The captain and sergeant carefully made their way to the back, arriving just on time to see someone opening the door for Lambert to get it. With only a fraction of a second to act, Price jumped to grab the door before it would completely close. He gestured to Gaz to silently follow him inside.

Soap entered the building who was slightly more lively. Looking at his watch it was lunch time, indeed people would be gathering here and there a lot more than during work hours. That was the perfect time to strike something. With Ghost watching him like a hawk, he walked around the lobby, on high alert.

Scotty couldn’t shake the feeling that something wasn’t right. Why would Lambert join forces with terrorists from another country against his company? Even if it was because he wanted to make things right for the shady trials that were done in the country Quds Force were, that was very extremist on his part. Not only that but why suddenly dip in illegal weapons trading? Military grade even, well at least they looked like standard weapons used, which was probably stolen property thanks to Lambert's new allies. She scouted the street as her brain was burning to connect all. Two gray vans rolled in opposite directions. They parked right in front of the building. It all clicked in an instant. Most of Lambert’s bomb attacks were never meant to hurt, only to scare. But this time? It wasn’t a bomb he had planned. Her hand flew to the radio and pushed the button. “Captain, there's no bomb! This is going to be a bloodbath!”

Ghost shifted to look at her. “What do you mean? What’s going on?” Price asked in a whisper.

“Two vans parked in front of the building… the weapons… Quds Force… They are not taking hostages today!”

Ghost’s head snapped back to his scope to look at what she meant. Indeed when the doors opened from the vehicle, men with scarves, masks on their faces were visible. “There’s hostiles coming your way Soap. Possibly armed.”

A door slamming behind him, brought him back to his surroundings. He looked above his shoulders to see the room empty. “Fucking hell don’t tell me!” He returned to his scope and saw Scotty running across the street, a bulletproof jacket in hand, avoiding being seen by the enemies and she entered the building.

She pushed the door, getting a few puzzled looks from everyone. She was in full gear standing out from everyone else in the big hall. The security guard didn’t waste time to catch up with her, but she was faster to catch up with Soap who was rather surprised to see her. “What are you doing here? You are supposed to be with Ghost.” He inquired.

“You're gonna need a hand. And more plates.” She handed him the bulletproof jacket that he quickly put on.

“Excuse me, I don't know what is going on here, but I’ll ask you to come with me or exit the perimeter.” The guard said.

Scotty grabbed his shoulder. “What is going on here is that in a few seconds you have a group of armed personnel who are going to come through that door and start shooting. So get everyone out of here now!”

“You expect me to belie-” He was interrupted when a gunshot came from behind them. The two soldiers turned around handguns at the ready, to see Lambert standing on the central counter. They could have shot him right and here and there, if it wasn’t from the panic of the crowd and the new rounds of shoot being fired. It was pure chaos. Civilians ran everywhere to take cover, others ducked flat on the ground making it a hazard for the runners and death bodies started to drop. On the opposite, ten men, armed with automatic rifles, approached shooting at anyone they had in their way. Soap and Scotty didn’t waste another second and opened fire back. But not before, she fired on Lambert who realized who was standing in front of him. She got him in the chin. The man yelped in pain and fell down. At the same time, one of the attackers dropped dead, headshot on the back. This took all of them by surprise. A window of opportunity for Soap to aim at one and hit him on the chest.

They all quickly dodged for cover once they figured out they were surrounded. Price and Gaz showed up on time and they also took cover.

“That’s a little extreme isn’t it?” Gaz commented.

“You don’t say!” Scotty groaned, ducking back after attempting to take a shot.

“How did you figure this out?” Price asked. He got one that dropped right in the middle of his track to change position.

“Instinct? This was a much more calculated operation. He had many allies and new gears, then the vans showed up. It just clicked.” She admitted. Another sniper shot echoed in the hall. Scotty looked over her cover to see how the situation was. Many civilians were still in the crossfire, seven out of ten attackers always standing and… “Son of a bitch!”

Lambert was attempting an escape despite his wound. He escaped her once, not this time. Cover me was all she asked the 141 as she jumped back in the action to run after him. One of the attackers saw this reckless act and took the chance to shoot at her. Price reacted fast, however not fast enough. The bullet still hit her. Scotty groaned in pain that did not stop her though. She kept going after Lambert who in a desperate attempt started to fire back. She dodged it by jumping in a nearby room. “It’s over Lambert! Surrender now!” She yelled.

“Not till they realize what they have done to thousands of innocents!”

“What do you think you are doing here! Not much better!” Scotty mounted her gun on the door frame and leaned to check how the situation evolved. Lambert was standing in the hallway, a young man held in a choke hold and gun pointed at him. Not good. Scotty slowly raised from her spot, gun aimed at Lambert. “How is killing innocent people here, will change anything?”

“Please!” The young man begged. “I don’t want to die!”

“Shut up! I tried to bring attention to the company, but no one listened! I tried to scare them and it changed nothing. I tried the pacifist route, time to speak the only language they understand, death!”

“Come on Lambert, this kid has nothing to do with all this. Let him go.”

Lambert tightened his grip and pressed the muzzle harder against the man's head. “She is right sir.” He cried out. “I’m just an intern! I did nothing!”

Lambert was getting agitated. “Fuck! He promised you wouldn’t find me! Fuck!”

“Who?”

“Shut up! Fuck this was not supposed to happen!” Footsteps echoed from behind the sergeant. Lambert saw the three men coming towards them. “Don’t come closer or I’ll shoot!”

The captain and two sergeants stopped only a few meters behind Scotty. The tension was high. One wrong movement, word or look could end in an innocent man dying. Lambert stepped back, eyes locked on the task force, if they dared a single step forwards… “Lambert, for the third time, let the kid go and let’s talk about everything. We can find a peaceful solution.”

“You think I’m stupid! No court will let me out of prison till I die, there’s no peaceful solution.” He armed the gun.

A shot fired. And a scream echoed.

Her eyes never blinked once even after the body hit the floor. The young man collected himself and made a run for his life in the direction of the soldiers. Scotty didn’t want things to end up like this, but with the life of an innocent at stake, it’s all she could do. Reasoning with Lambert was impossible. His body lay down on the ground, motionless, blood slowly covering the carpet where the shot had pierced his head. She lowered down her weapon and turned to Price who looked at her unfazed. He would have probably made the same call.

While everything went down to the HQ, the other teams raided the location simultaneously putting an end to any further risk from these specific operations. Once all the heat had died down, SAS cleaned up the mess, paramedics were called from all stations to tend to the wounded and critical states. Meanwhile the 141 and Scotty returned to the base. Now that this was all done, she could return home, more or less at peace. Something was still missing. Who helped Lambert? The only reason why she regretted killing him was that this will remain a mystery for a little longer. If she could ever get to the bottom of this.

Pack hanging from her shoulders, Scotty let out a sigh. It was time to return home and for some reason, she couldn’t bring herself to be happy to do so. She had barely spent three days with the team and wished they could work again together… Would it be wild to say that she wouldn’t mind working for the 141? A crazy idea that Scotty pushed aside for the moment. But the sense of urgency, the action, the quick thinking and fast pace, she never experienced that in such a short time. Usually, even with the big cases, it took longer to get from start to finish, the adrenaline rush wasn’t the same. She closed the door of the room and headed to Price’s office.

Scotty knocked on the door and a faint coming in rose from behind. Price was there talking with Ghost, it felt like she was interrupting something important. "I can't come back later." She proposed.

"No, it's alright, lass. We were done." Price reassured. He grabbed a backpack under his desk and threw it on his shoulder. "Time to go, Scotty."

She frowned. She came here to say goodbye and thanked him for all that they had done for her. But the way he was acting now, why did he sound like he was also going on the plane? "You are going somewhere, sir?" She played dumb. Which dragged what she swore to be a snort from Ghost and his shoulders quickly moved up and down. Probably the closest thing to a laugh she saw coming from this man. So he had a sense of humor!

"I'll be accompanying you back to your base. Laswell wants to make sure that your superiors get good words for your work."

"And it has to be in person? Not that I mind the company traveling back but wouldn't it be simple to send a message, letter I don't know."

Price and Ghost exchanged a look. She was wiser than she made it look. Price reassured her by explaining that he anyway had business to attempt in a nearby country, so a quick stop wouldn't be an issue. Scotty shrugged it off and half an hour later they boarded the plane back to Belgium.

At the landing, Scotty was rather surprised to not see Commander Peeters standing there ready to chew her up as soon as she stepped a foot on the tarmac. Thinking about the last conversation she had with the man, it was obvious she would be in trouble for her disrespect. Only his assistant, who urged her to go see him. She guided the captain throughout the building to her commander's office. At the door, waiting outside they saw a familiar face.

"Laswell?" Scotty wondered. The woman lifted her eyes from her device.

"John, Moreau. Glad to see you here." She offered a smile.

"I didn't know you would be there." The sergeant returned the kindness with a shake of hands.

"This mission sort of became mine when I assigned the 141 to help, it's only wise to see it's complete resolve from where it all started. It's a shame that Lambert had to die, he could have given us more information on Quds Force." Scotty raised an eyebrow. "I read it in the captain's report."

"That was quick, sir." She scoffed. "I still have to write mine." Price gave a pat on her back. She excused herself to have a talk with her commander. The door closed silently behind her, the man never lifting his head from the papers on his desk. She cleared his throat, not even a reaction.

"Good afternoon sir." She attempted.

"Take a seat, Moreau." The commander finally got up from his, went to the door and locked it. Scotty took a deep breath ready to get chewed on. "I'm very disappointed in your attitude these last days. Going above my authority to get what you want, yelling at me when I calmly asked you to come back because this was going nowhere."

"Sir, if I'm may…"

"No, you may not." He dryly interrupted her. "I don't care what you have to say. If you can’t respect your superior, I don't think you deserve that promotion."

"Sir, wait! Laswell is the one who…"

"Enough! I'm not done! Not only do you not follow the directive, but now our only suspect is dead. What if he had more allies? Why did you have to shoot him?" He leaned close, glaring at her.

Time stood still for a moment. Scotty looked at her commander worried. Not because she lost her promotion but… "Sir, I haven't written my report to you yet… how do you know about this?"

Peeters’s expression changed quickly and he shifted back up, uneasy. "I… I have my contacts."

If he had been wise enough he would have said he read it in Price's report that Laswell could have given him prior to this meeting… but his non verbal spoke for him. This was all she needed to finally connect what was right under her nose.

It came all crashing down like the biggest slap in the face she ever received. That was why he tried to get her off the case, she was getting too close. When they raided Golberg's house, she did call him first and told him too much, he tipped off Lambert about their arrival which would explain why they missed him by not much. The missing files in the database, he erased all of them. The weapons transfers must have been approved by him… And the only reason why they succeed in catching Lambert this time was because she kept most of her newest information to herself. Otherwise, the terrorists would have called off the attack. Her eyes glared at the commander, Scotty kept it together. Her fists clenched on the armrest. Rage was boiling up inside her chest, her breathing was fast. "It was you." She dropped.

Peeters adjusted his uniform, more as a nervous tic than a need. But his demeanor changed quickly. As if the man in front of her was someone completely different. He walked calmly behind his desk. "You can't prove anything. In the end, it is your word against mine and who do you think higher up will believe? Now, I'll be waiting for your report on my desk by this evening."

"You… How! Why!" Scotty stood up, slamming her hands on the table. The commander didn't flinch. It was from this angle that Scotty saw it. His hand under the desk. "You wouldn't dare kill me when there's people outside?"

"I think we both know that this wouldn't be the worst thing I have done." They remained at a stand still for a moment. Waiting for the other to make the first move, tension rising up at every click of the clock. What could she do? Jump on him and defend herself? It was probably what Peeters hoped to make it look like she was the one to have been a threat. Run to the door? He wouldn't hesitate to shoot her and god know what excuse he would find to save his ass. She could call for help… but the door was locked. Sweat rolled down her temple, she never looked away for a second. Something had to be done and now. The only weapon she had with her was a throwing knife, however her intentions were not to kill the man. He had to stay alive and face the consequences of his acts.

"Why would you even do this? Why would you betray us?" Scotty questioned.

"We are not military, Moreau. We are something different and…"

"We are still sworn to protect our country and the civilians! Not bring terrorists and bombs all across it! Did you agree with Lambert? That our government and this company should pay for what's going on in other countries? Your sentiments might be in the right place, but your actions are not!"

"Wise as always. I didn't lie when I told Laswell that you were one of my best assets… it's a shame to waste it."

Fight or flight. Scotty pushed herself quickly over the desk to grab the commander's arm before he would pull out the pistol. The man moved a step back, almost tripping on his chair, but was able to avoid her. In the action, all the paper and computer's screen that on the desk went flying in a loud noise. A noise that alerted Price and Laswell on the other side, as if the heated conversation hadn't already but it was hard to understand what they were even talking about when it was a language they didn't understand.

The sergeant rolled off the desk, fell flat on the ground and pushed herself back up ready to tackle the commander. The man had anticipated her actions; he was anchored, immovable. Peeters grabbed her shoulders and hit her in the stomach with his knee. She let go of him with a groan. He took this opportunity to grab the pistol. Before he could aim at her, Scotty grabbed his arm, twisted in his back forcing him to let go of the weapon. She kicked it away. Peeters yelped in pain. His remaining free arm was enough for him to elbow her in the face. She bit her lip and the taste of blood overwhelmed her mouth. Scotty lost her footing, Peeters went for a frontal tackle. Both hit the ground, Scotty harder than him, knocking the air out of lungs. The commander punched her in the face. She barely had the time to protect herself from the second blow. "Captain!" She screamed.

Peeters was taken by surprise. Now was her chance. She hit him hard on the side. The commander growled, moving off her with the impact. Scotty rolled on her belly, ready to jump back on her feet and aim for the door. He was quicker and grabbed her by the hair, pulling her back to him. Meanwhile, Price was pounding on the door, slamming with his shoulder to open it.

The commander grabbed her in a chokehold, his arm pressed tight around her neck. Even using his second arm to apply as much pressure as he could. "It's over, Moreau! You can't win, you were never meant to." He whispered in her ear. Scotty struggled to get him off. Her body jerked in all directions, feet kicking to push him back, arms trying to loosen the grip or hit him, nothing. She gasped for air, but none filled back her lungs.

The door came crashing. Scotty choked on a call for help. "Let go of her now!" Price barked at the commander.

Peeters didn't not. "She attacked me first!" He yelled back with a strong accent. His grip tightened even more to the point Scotty swore her neck was about to be snapped. Through her blurry vision, she could see that Price and Laswell had nothing to force him. In a last attempt, she jerked her foot in a direction. Price followed and saw the pistol on the ground. Without hesitation he grabbed it and aimed at the commander.

"Don't make me repeat myself!" The pistol clicked. The commander admitted defeat.

Scotty was about to pass out when his arm loosened. Air rushed back in, she caught violently and choked on a few breaths. Laswell intervened to grab her and pull her away from the commander. Price was always aiming at the man.

The racket alerted other operatives in the area who rushed to the scene. Including the second-in-command of the base. He entered the room rather surprised by the scene unfolding. "What's going on here?"

"Fucking Commander Peeters is a traitor!" Scotty choked. Her throat hurted. "He worked with Lambert and the terrorists! He fucking betrayed us!"

The commander slowly stood up, hands up. The second-in-command looked at his superior silently asking if this was true. A question that got no answer. "What proof do you have about these accusations, sergeant?"

Scotty opened her mouth to explain what she found, even if nothing had concrete hard proof, but Laswell was faster. "Sergeant Moreau here has actually been the one to reinforce proof we had about your commander sir. Whatever she can add, will be supported by ours."

Scotty looked at Laswell bewildered. What was going on? Laswell explained how the CIA had been into Commander Peeters for a while now, how they retraced some shipments all the way to here that, now thanks to Scotty's help, made in his name. Second-in-Command Willems was still skeptical but to not risk anything, he agreed to put Peeters under custody till he could either clear himself or Laswell could prove his guilt.

*****

Sat on the infirmary's bed, Scotty winced when the alcohol rubbed on her wound. Price was standing there watching with a smile. When the nurse was done, she left the sergeant and captain alone. Scotty put back her jacket, lifting her head to meet the captain's eyes. "So, she only helped me because that was an advantage to her?"

Price chuckled. "No, kid. You two just happened to need each other. You needed someone to keep going with your operation, she needed someone that could fortify her findings, in a situation you were both working on. Don't take it like you were used."

"But I was, in a way." She held her head in her hands with a groan. "I get what you mean captain. Don't worry. It explains why she was inclined to help a total stranger in the first place."

"No hard feelings?" He took a seat next to the bed.

"Not at all. Not toward you or her… only my commander. I held him in such high regard and, despite my sometime talkback, always respected him… it's a little bit of a blow."

"Betrayal is always a tough pill to swallow. I hope you are ready to testify against him. You know this might happen."

"He tried to kill me, sir. I'll be more than glad to testify." They both laughed heartily. Scotty began to fidget with her fingers. "May I ask you something, sir?"

"Call me Price. What is it, Scotty?"

She softly smiled when he emphasized on her callsign. "Working with the 141 was… I really liked that. The team was great to work with." Even if Ghost was a little bit of a cold bitch. Well the only good word he said was that she did a good job after the assault on the HQ. First and last compliment she got from him since she had arrived. "From what Soap and Gaz told me about your previous missions, your job seems more interesting than what I do."

"Interesting is one word to describe it." He smiled.

"What I mean is what you do really has a larger scale impact on everything… And… well the worse you can say is no, but…"

"You want to join?" She nodded. "Let me talk with Laswell. But you might have to get approval from your new commander."

Scotty thanked him, holding down a much more excited reaction. She didn't want to put too much hope into this.

******

Ghost was standing on the tarmac wondering why Price asked him to retrieve something important. Soap was also there, looking rather more restless than usual. They had heard from the captain what happened two weeks prior when he traveled with Scotty. It was an impressive turn of events. In the meantime, life had returned to normal for the 141. Well Soap had been corresponding with Scotty at that time and he knew a little secret. The reason for his demeanor as the helicopter landed.

"What's the matter, MacTavish?" He asked.

"Nothing, Lt." The Scotsman replied, yet he had a grin on his face.

"Something I should know?"

"See for yourself." He nodded in the direction of the heli. Ghost returned his focus on it and saw Scotty jumping down from it. That was a surprise. She quickly ran to them as the heli started its engine to fly back.

"It's good to see you again." She greeted them.

"What are you doing here?" Ghost wondered. "Need help again?"

"No sir. I'm here to be officially part of the 141." It was hard to read him behind the mask. She couldn't tell if he was surprised, happy or angry by this. All he did was a small nod.

"Welcome back."

They took her back to Price who made her sign a few more papers. Being classified as an international task force, adding someone like Scotty wasn't much of an issue. Commander Willems allowed her to 'quit' the BSF, on the condition that she would come back to the country once in a while. Especially when the time will come to bring Peeters to martial court. Otherwise, she was free to be part of her new team.

This was a big decision and change, something Scotty was used to, from joining the military to the Belgian Silent Force and now the 141, this would only be a new challenge she was happy to accept.

#cod fanfic #cod oc #series: wie goed doet goed ontmoet #oc:camille scotty moreau #simon ghost riley #john soap mactavish #kyle gaz garrick #captain john price #kate laswell

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legobiwan · 4 years

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Alright people, I am finally caught up with the Mandalorian Season 2. My reaction thus far:

(spoilers ahoy)

So far, this season doesn’t seem to have a strong direction. It’s mostly Din getting sent from sidequest to sidequest featuring “this week’s special guest stars(s).” I realize that this is all supposed to be building up to something, but I hope the payoff is worth it.

I love Cobb Vanth. This is probably because I love Timothy Olyphant. I dearly hope he returns and gets a bit more material to work with before the end of the season. Kind of annoying that we had to go back to Tatooine again, but Star Wars just can’t seem to kick its legacy characters (which is something I’ll get into later).

Speaking of Tatooine...while I loved the introduction of the idea of the moisture farmers and the Sandpeople working together, we never really...saw any of it happening? Show, don’t tell, as the old adage goes. While there wasn’t time for a treatment of Tatooine’s complicated social issues as was done in the Kenobi novel, the whole concept seemed pretty perfunctory as a way for Mando to blow up a krayt dragon.

(and I had to laugh, whatever “prize” organ the Sandperson found was 100% one of those bouncy balls you’d find in Ralph’s or Von’s or something at the beach sale bucket for $4.99. Along those lines, the effects - both practical and VFX - have not been anywhere near as high quality this season.)

Frog episode. Fun! It was one of my favorite episodes even though it accomplished very little in terms of pushing the narrative forward. Funny characterization of baby Yoda (I kept expecting him to go full-on Yoshi with those spiders), great introduction of the Frog species, and the spiders were pretty cool.

Bo-Katan episode. A PORT CITY! Something DIFFERENT! Finally!

Mando seems to suffer from power creep and relapse which is a persistent issue in Star Wars in general (see the Ahsoka episode for more discussion revolving around that). He blew up the krayt dragon almost single-handedly, fought off all those spiders, and yet was pretty taken down by the Mon Calamari pirate gang.

I had no issue with Bo-Katan showing up, and I think her reference to Mando being in a religious cult is fascinating and I would like to know a lot more about that. (Also interesting in how it can also be an oblique reference to the Jedi who were considered, by some, to also be an esoteric religious cult.)

So because of this, does Mando seriously not know who Bo-Katan is? I’m guessing all that history was erased, even something as simple as the fact that Bo-Katan was the sister of a Mandalorian ruler.

And funny enough, I feel kind of bad for her. She wants that Darksaber, wants to rule Mandalore and it feels like she has been fighting the same fight with the same words since we were introduced to her in TCW. I don’t know if that was the intended effect (likely not), but she strikes me as a character almost stuck in her own narrative, unable to move on. Although I do appreciate that she still seems rather morally grey here, which is a nice change of pace from characters who masquerade as morally grey (read: Mando and clan) but who are really coded as the “good guys” (fighting - again - against the “bad guys”.)

(Which gets me into a whole other discussion in that I find that only the Prequels and TCW really delve into that uncertain area where the good guys - even the Jedi - are not 100% good. And that the Legends material really dug at the fracture while the new material - books, movies, shows - tends to shy away from moral complexity. It’s frustrating, as the ambiguity is what is so appealing about the whole damn thing.)

So if the Frog Couple’s children were the last of their kind, was Baby Yoda about to perpetuate a genocide because he was hungry? Because, that’s honestly pretty damn funny.

Oh, the New Republic isn’t learning from the Old Republic. Much like Russia, you never try to invade and control the Outer Rim. It just ends up in tears.

Okay, the macaron scene was pretty damn funny and wholly superfluous and petty use of the Force that I could see...wait for it...Obi-wan perpetuating in his youth.

So. Clones. M-blood. Shadows of Jen Zanna Arbor and Plageius’s experiments. Plus Gideon looking on at his Death Trooper clones who look a bit like Vader. Is Gideon trying to create a Force-sensitive army that can be controlled via these suits in TIE Fighters that look A LOT like Thrawn’s defenders? Does Gideon know about the Chiss Navigators and is this how he got the idea? Because that would tie some things together.

Alright. Ahsoka’s episode. Sigh...

Dave Filoni needs to let go. I love Ahsoka, she’s a fantastic character, but at this point, she sucks the oxygen out the room for any other storyline. I never liked the way she was brought back in Rebels, I thought her existence on that other plane after the battle of Malachor was a perfect ending for her.

(I’m not going to get into the costuming too much. It didn’t work. Disney has enough money to do effects, I don’t why they couldn’t have touched this up just a hair while keeping with the “gritty realism” aesthetic of this show. The whole thing was rather jarring.)

And the thing is, she’s taken on Vader, has come back from the dead twice, has defeated Maul and then suddenly this weird Magistrate Lady is giving her issues? Like, I get getting older and not being as on top of your game but if Ben Kenobi of the desert could take down Maul in three slashes, you would thing Ahsoka wouldn’t be having these issues.

Along those lines, that fight sequence was painful to watch. I’m 1000% certain Filoni was referencing either some Western or Kurosawa flick which I am too film-illiterate to know offhand, but it just...didn’t work. Especially seeing as the VFX wasn’t strong enough to support the questionable choreography/blocking.

I have no issue with Ahsoka coming to terms with the Jedi at an older age, that’s what happens. You have to drop at least some of your grudges. And I don’t even mind Mando and Grogu meeting up with a Jedi like this. But I wish it had been a different Jedi or maybe one we hadn’t even known before.

And that’s the thing. Star Wars gets so bogged down in its legacy characters (see: the Sequels) that it gets in its own narrative way. (And ironically enough, most of these “legacy” characters are from the much-maligned Prequel-era). Look at the popularity of Rebels, of Fallen Order, of the Thrawn books (and ELI VANTO, ahem). There’s so much room to expand and play with new themes, new ideas rather than fall back on this “good rebels” vs. “evil empire” with the “very good Jedi” helping mystically along the way. Give me more religious cults, more conspiracy theories, more politics and taxation and trade routes. That’s what made the Prequels so great. I’m hoping this Moff Gideon storyline will go off in an interesting direction as will Mando’s culty background but we’ll see.

So...five episodes into the season I give it a 6/10 so far. We’ll see how it all goes.

#hello there #the mandalorian #the mandalorian spoilers #baby yoda #bo katan kryze #ahsoka tano #and now i'm going for a run #back later tumblr #legobiwan watches a television show

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katehuntington · 4 years

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2020, 1st edition Disclaimer: ‘Kate Huntington’s Author & Fanfiction Recommendations’ is a platform for writers, to show appreciation for their work and expand their audience. I do not claim to be the author of these stories, neither do I own them. Read each writer’s warnings carefully, most of them are rated +18.

Without further ado, here is my list of recommendations.

One shots

“While You Sleep” - written by @foreverwayward Fluff - Dean Winchester - 617 words A heartwarming little fic about Dean living the domesticated life we all wish he could have. The writer has a very clever way of storytelling and the end might come as a surprise, only adding to the emotion it already brought along.

“Imagine” - written by @pennydrabbles Fluff - Dean x Reader - 800 words ‘Imagine calling Dean after a bad day and saying you miss him,’ says the header of this marvelous little story. It’s soothing, with strong descriptions, yet never over the top. Simplicity isn’t necessarily a bad word. It takes skill to not overy describe a scene and let the tale be told by the personal emotion of the reader. The author is able to do this with such elegance, that you actually feel Dean’s comfort.

“Heartbeats” - written by @there-must-be-a-lock Fluff - Dean x Castiel - 930 words Castiel is fascinated by the human heart, but doesn’t quite understand it, until he becomes human himself. I’ll start by saying that I don’t ship Dean and Cas together, but I do appreciate the people who do. What this little piece of art does is incredible, however, because while I was reading, I found myself rooting for them. The writer does a great job by using the literal human heart as a backbone of this story. Intriguing and very well executed.

“Everything That’s Yet To Come” - written by @fictionalabyss Fluff - Dean x Reader - 812 words Dean experiences what the future beholds, with the people who he wishes could be there. The author took me by the hand through this moving little one shot, which feels like a collection of greatest hits and wishes come true. It offers peace and closure not only for the older Winchester brother, but for the reader as well. Beautiful piece of writing.

“Take A Drunk Girl Home” - written by @amanda-teaches Fluff - Dean x Reader - 1869 words Dean taking care of others; it’s his nature and shows what a kind soul he truly is. The situation sketched here is no exception, and it’s softer than one can imagine. The pace is steady and the balance between fluff and comedy is just right. A lovely read.

“New Beginnings” - written by @our-jensen-ackles-love Fluff - Dean x Reader - 1665 words New Year’s Eve; a new start, a new life and plenty of reason to celebrate. A lovely ‘feel good’ story that makes us forget about the monsters, pain and loss Supernatural is known for. The level of fluff is equivalent to cuddling with puppies.

“When He Cries” - written by @revengingbarnes Angst/fluff - Dean x Reader - 1894 words When the woman who Dean loves falls victim during a case, the hunter has trouble dealing with the aftermath. And, boy... Does that hurt to witness. This is one of the most breathtaking stories I have stumbled on. The realism that is used to describe the gruesome and horrific angst, the emotion that is laced in every word, had me clutching my chest while reading. It’s is a beautiful piece of art.

“Nobody” - written by @soaringeag1e Angst - Dean x Reader - 2561 words This one shot reminds us why we should never stay angry with a loved one and let a fight unresolved, because what if something bad happens and we won’t have the chance to make it right? The writer gives a great sense to that fear and having to watch Dean go through this nightmare is truly heartbreaking.

“The Demon Inside You” - written by @foreverwayward Smut/angst - Demon!Dean x Reader - 4375 words Curing Dean from the demon that he has become proves to be difficult when he’s so hard to resist. What else is hard to resist, is this beautiful pitch black one shot. I don’t read Demon!Dean fiction often, because it still feels foreign to see the character who I love so much turn into something evil. This however, is so gripping and well written, that the darkness swallows up the beholder. Rough, hot, sad, narcissistic, all these ingredients packed up in one hell of a story.

“Curves And Edges” - written by @kittenofdoomage Smut/fluff/angst - Dean x Reader - 4375 words This equally sweet, sexy, funny and sad story is a big shout out to all women who think they don’t meet the beauty standards and feel like they will never be good enough to get noticed. It is one thing to replace a name with Y/N and call it a reader’s insert; it’s a gift to make every person reading this feels like they are the character in this story. The author handles every woman’s insecurities with grace, making her words both relatable and soothing. Her spot on version of Dean reminds us that we are all beautiful, desired and unique.

“Hold Her Tight” - written by @waywardbaby Fluff/smut - Dean x Reader - 2955 words ‘A story of a deep need to feel someone close to you’, is how the author describes her work. I couldn’t have said it better, because this one shot isn’t about sex; it’s about love making, and there’s a difference. What I also appreciate, is that Y/N takes the time to pamper herself. We all deserve some self care.

“Watch Your F!cking Mouth!” - written by @impala-dreamer Smut/comedy - Dean x Reader - 1984 words Dean falls under a literal curse, and it’s the most fun I’ve had in a long time. I was wheezing, couldn’t breathe and died laughing. It’s astonishing how the writer can juggle comedy and sex without the two taking each other down. An uplifting read.

“Thank God For Sexual Frustration” - written by @winchester-fantasies Smut - Dean x Reader - 4398 words God had nothing to do with writing this sinful story; we can thank the author for that. When Y/N is on a dry spell that has her frustrated, Dean helps her out in the best way imaginable. Delicious smut served in three courses, because we all know Dean keeps his lady satisfied.

Series:

“Life For Rent” - written by @winchest09 Smut/angst/fluff - Mobster!Dean x Escort!Reader - WIP This amazing series follows an experienced, smart and resilient escort, who is ruled by contracts, money and aliases. When Dean becomes her client, he makes it his mission to understand what this interesting woman is hiding. Conspiracies, deceat, crime. A strong family bond, blossoming love, oh, not to mention the sex. This series is intriguing beyond imagination and certainly not just another mobster fanfiction. The writing is smart and I could tell from the first paragraph that it’s loaded with hints and foreshadowing, but I couldn’t pick them out. This triggers a curiosity like an itch I can’t quite scratch away until I finish reading this story. And so I wait eagerly and drop everything the second a new chapter comes out. An absolute must read!

“Findings” - written by @kathaswings Angst/smut/fluff - Dean x Reader - finished. Update: Sadly, this series is no longer online This story starts out with what seems to be a routine demon hunt, until Dean and his brother find a frightened five year old survivor amongst the blood and corpses. Keeping the smart little Mackenzie safe and getting her back to her older sister proves to be difficult, because this case is a whole lot bigger than they anticipated and is likely to change their lives forever. This is one of my favorite Supernatural series and I revisited it recently. The overall story arc is a mystery I just had to unravel and I couldn’t put it down if I wanted to. The bond between Dean and Mackenzie is so precious. Writing a child isn’t easy. I’ve read plenty of books and seen plenty of films in which the maturity the creators added wasn’t natural, but this author handles Mac’s dialogue amazingly well. What’s also interesting is the jumps from point of view between Dean and Y/N, giving very personal perspectives on the gripping story.

“When You Least Expect It” - written by @coffee-obsessed-writer Fluff/angst/smut - Jensen Ackles x Musician!Reader - WIP This gorgeously written slow burn series kicks off when Jensen visits the idyllic town of Seaside. After a bad breakup he keeps his mind occupied with the organisation of a music festival, hoping to find a musician that fits the vibe he has in mind. He meets a spirited, undiscovered performer, not only her voice catching him by surprise. A friendship blossoms, with potential to grow into something more, but will their past allow the love they feel for each other? Talking about an epic love story, but it’s so much more than that. The music that plays such an important factor, the setting that is Seaside. The fabulous supporting characters Bri, Rob, Jason and Jared, the wardrobe, not to mention the wonderful little gems and details that this author weaved into the story, showing how much love she has put into it. This is without a shadow of a doubt my favorite RPF I’ve come across.

Thank you for reading! If you enjoyed the work of the authors above, don’t be afraid to let them know. I’m sure they will appreciate it. Feel free to share!

If you have any suggestions or would like a tag in the future, drop a request in my inbox or send me a message.

Love, Kate

‘Kate Huntington’s Author & Fanfiction Recommendations’ taglist: @adoptdontshoppets @fangirlxwritesx67 @idksupernatural @indecisive20something @tranquility-or-chaos @winchest09 @wingedcatninja

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thoughtsofanexcitedspacechild · 4 years

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Writing Tips (Pt. 3): Writing Believable and shippable relationships in literature.

Hello friends! First of all, let me say a HUGE thank you for the support on the Kataang post! I worked really hard on it and it means so much to me all the little notes you give it and reblog it! I know it’s not at a huge number of notes, but I like knowing that people took time to read through the endless rant and reblog it! I’m planning on doing another full analysis on Zutara and why specifically it doesn’t work. I’ll make it respectful though as I know that a lot of Kataang fans are REALLY defensive and anti-zutara. I promise I’m not one of those people, and believe that no matter who you ship, your opinions on fictional characters are your opinions and you are FULLY entitled to ship and like whatever you want (as long as it’s not incest or a huge age gap. PLEASE don’t ship that stuff lol. U nasty mfs know who u are.) Speaking of ships, let’s talk about writing them. Writing ships for movies, books, shows, etc. can be surprisingly hard. Writing characters themselves can be hard enough as it is, but writing a pair of characters that fit together like a puzzle piece can feel impossible. Nevertheless, I’m here to make that process a little bit easier. When I’m trying to set up a relationship that’s going to happen, here are some things that I keep in mind to make sure that I and the audience of my writing ship the characters I have end up together.

DISCLAIMER before I get a’rantin: I am by NO means telling you how or what to write and am by NO means a professional writer of any sorts. I’m doing this mostly because I write a lot and speak from my own personal experiences with writing and because these are just the things that I found work best when writing my own stories. I also read and analyze a lot of others work on my own personal time, and these are just the details that I pick up on that I find makes a piece of writing effective. With that in mind, remember that writing is and art form, and the beauty of that is that there’s no one right way to do it. Ever. You can read the same thing as another person and interpret it in a completely different and unique way.

1. Complementary Characters usually work out best.

This is more than the classic “opposite’s attract” theory, and characters don’t necessarily have to be opposite to be complementary. Some things to think about when thinking of and writing complementary characters:

-Complementary doesn’t necessarily mean complete opposite in every single way. Often times I find it much more helpful to have characters share a common interest in hobbies, upbringing, childhood trauma (that one’s a bit overdone these days), etc. so that they’re not butting heads all the time. Just like yin and yang, theres a bit of darkness in the light and vice versa. To keep the balance harmonious, you can’t have characters be polar opposites and have no common ground. That leads to what many people consider a toxic ship, and will either lead to an unrealistic balance that inevitably leads your characters to be fighting all the time.

-Keeping common interests in mind, often times the paces where character’s contrast is in their personalities. (Shy and bold, heart and head, bubbly and brooding, quiet and gregarious, etc.) Different personalities often are able to balance each other out and hold each other accountable for their weaknesses.

-Going off of that, one character’s strength is another’s weakness, and all traits are both. A character’s empathy can lead them to be loved by many, but may cause them to starve themselves and drain their cup so there’s none left to take care of themselves. A character’s logic may lend them top of class or calm in stressful situations, but can lead them to be insensitive to others and even their own emotions. Your characters should balance each other out and work well together, and part of this is helping each other grow from their weakness.

-This one isn't as important, but what I also find super compelling, especially in film and tv shows is when the authors/writers deliberately choose to give the characters complementary color palettes. (I dove more into this on my Kataang analysis so go read that if you’re super interested.) If the character’s look ascetically pleasing together, it makes shipping them a whole lot easier. Focus on orange and blue, yellow and purple, red and green, and any variation of those colors together.

2. Buildup

Often times one of the biggest critiques of ships that just don’t work out is that there’s not enough buildup or foundation to have a romantic relationship. It seems obvious, but if you’re going to have them end up together, there’s going to need to be some buildup or else the entire relationship will feel wrong and contrived no matter how pleasant you make it.

Some tips for increasing and establishing buildup:

-Have your otp spend time together as friends first. I personally find that the healthiest and most successful ships are friends before they’re lovers. This is why Kataang specifically works so well, but Korrasami, Romionie, and Liesel and Rudy from the Book Thief are all good examples. If you observe these ships, all of these characters spend time together as friends first. Korra and Asami were able to bond and become friends over a toxic guy (cough cough MAKO) and eventually developed feelings for one another. Ron and Hermione weren’t romantically interested in other people and were friends until they started seeing other people and found out they liked each other. Liesel and Rudy were best friends before anything else and Liesel didn’t realize her feelings until it was too late.

-Time together. When your otp spends time together, make sure that whatever time is being spent together is time that they both enjoy. No, the activity itself doesn’t have to be enjoyable to both characters, but the time spent together should be. If the characters really aren’t enjoying the time spent together, then it’s never gonna work out. I’ll use the ship that I’m writing as an example. Currently, I’m in the process of writing a third atlas series and we’ll use my characters Liang and Hana. (Yea I used my own name for one of my characters. I think it suits her bc she’s basically my clone, just, she’s the avatar. I’m going to change both of their names once I do more research and can find culturally and historically accurate names.) Liang REALLY loves pro-bending matches. Hana, not so much. She still goes with him to see matches and attends his matches when she can. On the flip side, Hana really loves going to her favorite tea shop. Liang vastly prefers a strong cup of coffee, but he goes with her anyways. Why would they choose to do something that they don’t necessarily like? Because that’s more quality time spent with each other and doing something for the other person.

3. Romantic Gestures

Going off of my last point, we have the art of romantic gestures. These can range to things anywhere from a hug, to an elaborate firework display, to a locket with both of their pictures in it. Make sure that the romantic gestures are there! It’s gotta be clear that both characters are thinking about one another and consciously choose to do something for the other person. Here are some fun ways to do it:

-Remembering a gift the other character wanted. This one’s cliche but it works, because often times the best way to show affection is through physical gifts and objects. Think coffee from a favorite shop, handwritten notes, that piece of clothing the other has been eyeing, etc.

-~symbolism~ *add chime here* By that I mean have an object to symbolize their relationship with, like Korrasami’s iconic hair pin or Liesel’s book that Rudy retrieved for her. This way, the readers not only have a visual representation of their favorite ships, but the object can physically link characters together and make a vague relationship full cannon. (I know for sure that someday when I get a tattoo, I want the hairpin tattooed on my wrist, ankle or side of my body.)

-PDAs. Works best in film and visual stuff, but still applies for everything. I’m talking cuddles, kisses, falling asleep in each other’s arms, the whole shebang. I mean how much clearer can you make it than a pda?

-Love languages. Each person loves in their own unique way. Have characters figure out and learn each other’s love language. It really shows and adds a whole other layer to the cake. This one can make a ship that feels a little bland have more depth and realism, because in the real world, healthy relationships are formed and aided by learning and applying each other’s love language.

4. Dialogue. This one can be hard to master, but once you do, it’s a breeze. First off, I recommend getting all your ideas out, and editing. DON’T EDIT AS YOU GO! This is often tedious and super annoying, so get everything out first, and go from there once you have a decent amount to work with. Dialogue is tricky, because dialogue in and of itself is meant to communicate and express feelings. Here are some tips and steps to at least get a start:

a. Know EXACTLY how your characters feel about one another, and make that evident through communication. It seems obvious (again) but this really helps and I find that putting myself in the character’s shoes for a second and really thinking about it helps to decide exactly what they would say in a given situation, especially if the scene you’re writing involves confrontation about feelings for one another.

b. Dialogue is more than just talking. Body language, tone, facial expressions, etc. are all part of dialogue too and are SUPER important! In the real world, humans communicate through more than just words, and sometimes a playful grin, grimace, crossed arms, or pout is much more effective than a character outright saying something.

c. Once you’ve written the dialogue out, be concise and smart about your dialogue and pare it down as much as you can. Often times, adding too much dialogue can make a scene boring and flat. Use your words sparingly! The purpose of writing is to covey a story or message and often times this can be done effectively with less words rather than more. The main point in dialogue itself is to provide necessary context and information. Otherwise, don’t use it.

d. Make sure the conversation is two sided. This (say it with me now) SEEMS OBVIOUS, but make sure that both people are talking/communicating. it’s a conversation, not a speech. (Unless it is a speech or declaration of some sort.)

Before I go: A QUICK (Long) PSA ON TOXIC SHIPS:

The concept of a toxic ship is very common in a lot of literature. Often times writers choose to include elements that may be toxic to heighten romantic tension in a story. While I do recognize that this sometimes may be a stylistic choice, there are MUCH better and effective ways to create tension that having something be toxic. Toxic relationships in my opinion share one purpose, and that is to establish a relationship’s toxicity and ineffectiveness. I don’t recommend writing these into a story unless it’s an obstacle for your characters to overcome, and having a character forgive the toxic actions of another character and still end up with them isn’t the right move because it completely disregards and diminishes the effects of what happened previously.

One of the best examples I can think of is Reylo from the new sw trilogy. I did touch on this briefly in a couple of my earlier posts (The Effect Of Modern Day SW characters and My Tips for Writing (In General) which I highly suggest you go read bc they both took me a bit of time and state the purpose more in depth) but I think I’ll quick reiterate and say that it wasn’t a good choice on the writer’s part to have some of the dialogue be so intense and vicious and then have them end up together. I still like the idea of Ben Solo and Rey together and ship them together out of cannon, but in cannon, it’s the perfect example of an ineffective ship. There was little to no build up, the dialogue was often spiteful and sharp, and it escalated a bit too quickly. I would’ve liked to see more of Ben Solo (NOT Kylo) and him feeling sorry for and repenting for the bad that he’s done before he and Rey end up together. Yes, we’re all suckers for the enemies to lovers trope, but PLEASE make sure to filter out the toxins before boarding your ships and watching them sail.

That’s it for now! I hope this helps a little when writing shippable characters! I’m always free to rant to and to critique. I’m going to start posting as much as I can, because these guides help me too! Check out my other ones if you’d like to know tips for writing in general and I made another one on how to write characters.

#writing #writing tips #writing tingz

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genderless-consul · 4 years

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Top 5 glee ships?

Straight to the live wire, huh?

Ok, so:

1): Brittana - The fact that I really struggle to write them doesn’t change the fact that this is the one they got right, and I can still barely believe it to this day. The original joke in Season 1 was so obviously a throwaway lazy gag from a writing staff that consistently wrote women with absolute contempt, but Naya pushing them to take it seriously changed the course of the entire show. Their arc in Season Two is Glee at its absolute best (they even made Gwyneth Paltrow tolerable!), they have some really beautiful moments in Season 3 even if that whole season and Santana’s coming out arc in particular is kind of a disaster, and as much as we love to make fun of Santana’s gay panic in Season 4 (don’t act like it’s not highly relatable) even their break-up is legitimately beautiful - Naya turning Mine into a breakup song with nothing but her voice is the moment that cemented her as the GOAT Glee vocalist in my book (also Hand in My Pocket/I Feel the Earth Move is my second ranked mash-up of all time and I’m so angry the awful Santana/Kurt scene right after overshadowed it). And I have....complicated feelings about A Wedding as an episode (and we’ll get to that) but their part of it is absolutely everything it needed to be. “I would have suffered it all, just for the tiny chance to be standing up here marrying you.”

2): Faberry - No surprises here, except maybe that it’s not number one (canonicity was the tiebreaker, sadly). My favorite thing about Faberry is that there’s a million ways to ship them and all of them are great - obviously I’m more than onboard for an alt-version of Glee where theirs is the slow burn unlikely love story, but I also really love the tragedy you can read into them just from the canon, especially spinning out from the Quinntana one-night stand: that Quinn probably does have feelings for Rachel but either realizes it too late or just buries it out of self-loathing, and by the time she’s comfortable with herself the chance for storybook romance has already passed her by. Like seriously - if they had made that characterization explicit instead of retreating to the laziness of the Biff/Quick disasters in the anniversary episodes, I would have been just as happy with that as a Faberry endgame, both because the latter was always probably impossible given the centrality of Finchel to the show’s core structure and because Sad Flameout Lesbians deserve representation too, goddammit! And of course they’re a gold mine for fanworks, because there are so many “could have been” moments where their story has the chance the take a different direction, the best being their confrontation in Original Song: “you can’t hate me for helping to send you on your way” is the best use of Glee’s existential sadness since the Pilot. Oh, and their one and only duet is a fucking Red/Blue sequence and also one of the best songs on the entire show - enough said.

3): Finchel - My ultimate hot take, at least as someone from the Faberry side of the fandom, is that Finchel is Good, Actually. Keep in mind, I never watched Glee as it was airing, so I never experienced the frustration of Finchel’s inevitability; I knew from the very beginning that they weren’t going to get their happy ending. And as irritating as some of the on-again/off-again drama could be and as choppy as the pacing was at times, it really was one of the few relationships on Glee to be developed with consistent care and effort. I love that they have a genuine friendship and push each other to be the best versions of themselves (however inelegantly) even when they aren’t together, and the dynamic where the guy is the willing sidekick to the female protagonist and knows what they have might only be temporary was really refreshing to see, especially in a high school show. I’ll always be heartbroken that they couldn’t end it the way they were supposed to even if I wouldn’t have liked it, and they’re the reason the final scene of Season 3 makes me sob every time.

4): Tike - The ultimate “THEY DESERVED BETTER” ship. And yes, I know it’s off-brand for me to put two m/f ships on the list, and yes, I know RBI basically had to make Tartie endgame as a courtesy to Kevin and Jenna for sticking it out until the absolute bitter end, but I’m still mad. Tina was always used as a joke, and Mike was never used at all, but when they were together they got the briefest taste of actual storylines, and they were so. goddamn. cute together. Sing! and L O V E aren’t the first Glee duets that most people think of, but they captured the magic of just being straight up in love with someone better than a lot of the more over-the-top numbers from other characters. And look, I don’t actually need my ships to stay together forever on a high school show (or any show), but given that they had the longest run as a continuous couple on the entire show I will never forgive RBI for using them as the one “no”in A Wedding in a disingenuous attempt to pretend they were at all interested in realism and weren’t just throwing bones to the fanbase. Like, I don’t know how to explain this to you, Ryan Murphy, but it’s not subverting expectations to kick the shit out of Tina one more time because THAT’S LITERALLY ALL YOU’VE EVER DONE WITH HER (Sorry, what was I talking about?)

5): Klaine - my ultimate love/hate ship, and the ultimate victim of Glee being consumed by its own hype machine. The initial arc - the staircase, Teenage Dream, Blackbird - was magical even at its corniest, and beats like the GAP Attack and Blame it on the Alcohol were desperately necessary moments of complication that kept Blaine’s character more interesting than “Kurt’s perfect boyfriend” (also, real quick, fuck Ryan Murphy’s biphobia). But the second Blaine transferred in Season 3 it became clear that they didn’t really have a plan for Klaine in the same way they did for Finchel - Blaine gets a different personality every single season, Kurt gets to a completely different place in his life that makes his inability to move on from Blaine really hard to buy, and Blaine as the New Rachel in 4/5 is every bit as insufferable as that conceit implies. Even with all that, though, they kept winning me back, because Darren can sell the hell out of over the top cheese and Chris Colfer is the world’s greatest exasperated Straight Man (thinking especially of Teenage Dream Reprise and that absolutely batshit Beatles proposal, both of which worked for me way more than they should have). I also weirdly like the messiness of late Season 5 Klaine - the episodes aren’t good, but I appreciate their willingness to confront how much of a terrible idea them living together at that stage of their life actually is, and they even managed to win me over to the idea that they would find a way to make it work anyway. But the Karofsky thing in Season 6 was just one reversal too far, and to get them back together again after that in the most contemptuous, smug, “nothing matters so just give the shippers what they want I guess” insincere way possible (I really hate The Hurt Locker, can you tell?) was the last straw for me, to say nothing of how disrespectful it was to Brittana and Klaine to have one couple’s wedding coopted at the last moment by another so that it was no longer about them as characters but about how much Ryan Murphy has done for The Gays. So yeah, Klaine: My favorite canon ship that I wish didn’t actually end up together, at least not the way they did. But they were at their best when Glee was actually relevant and changed a lot of lives as a result, and that timing alone earns them a Top 5 spot.

#Glee #top 5 anything #long post

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ghoste-catte · 4 years

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N R T

N: Is there a fic you wish someone else would write (or finish) for you?

Gosh, yeah. I have a couple of fic ideas floating around in the proverbial hopper that I just don’t think I have the plot/action/adventure writing skills to handle. I’m much better with feelsy, character-driven stuff, so anything that has too much plot in it feels very intimidating to me. There’s one fic idea in particular that I wanted to write for GaaLee Fest last year that’s a “Lee Wins” AU where Gaara loses their chuunin exams match and is badly injured instead. The concept was sort of that jinchuuriki healing is imperfect at best, and so while whatever injuries Gaara sustained during the match would, like, not bleed out or kill him ... I’m not convinced that damaged internal organs would be restored to full function, especially with Gaara’s seal being fucked up and Shukaku being such a blunt instrument. So the idea is that Gaara is left permanently debilitated by the match. And the spin-out from that would be that Gaara isn’t able to participate in the match with Sasuke, and the Konoha Crush can’t move forward because their ultimate weapon is incapacitated. So Orochimaru-as-Rasa would ... probably try to kill him, and to take Shukaku and implant the tailed beast in someone else. Not to mention Gaara would have to grapple with losing for the first time in his life, and Lee also would have to contend with ending someone else’s dream (even though Gaara’s dream isn’t really to be a shinobi). Anyway, there’s a lot that changes if you change something that early in the plot, and I’d need to really comb back through canon and probably re-read a lot of the exams and the Konoha Crush Arc and I’m just ... not up for that at the moment, and I’m not convinced I would be able to make the logical A-to-B-to-C connections from a plot standpoint, even if I could make them from a character standpoint. So I’d love to just ... wave a magic wand and have written it (or have someone else who has the bona fide plot chops to have written it).

R: Are there any writers (fanfic or otherwise) you consider an influence?

Hmm, this is hard. I often go back and re-read favorite stories or favorite handlings of similar tropes before I launch into writing my own take on a trope. I went back and read ‘you can get what you want or you can just get old’ by hyperlight (that’s a BNHA fic btw) before I wrote my own superhero AU, because I loved how they handled the ethics of superheroism. And especially if I’m writing a gift for someone who is also a writer, I’ll go back and read their stuff first to get a feel for their narrative voice and try to incorporate bits of that. So for example, when I was writing ‘A Snowball’s Chance in Hell’ last year for the GaaLee Holiday Exchange, I went back and re-read ‘The Bright Side’ by @gidget-goes to get a sense for their voice and style (because their style is so fun and so off-the-cuff snarky but still has such beautiful imagery). I guess my thought process is people write similar to the stuff they want to read, y’know? And there’s always someone who has done-the-thing better than I can hope to, so I might as well try to catch some of that shine.

If I’m trying to write an AU of a certain canon, too, I’ll go back and read some of that. So, like, I re-read parts of The Goblet of Fire when I was writing ‘Homespun, Heartfelt, and Handmade’ to try to get that feel. Before launching into writing ‘i think we’re haunted’, I re-read a bunch of favorite horror stories, so a couple vignettes from ‘Lullaby’ by Chuck Palahniuk, ‘Modern Coyote’ by Shane Jones, ‘Raphael’ by Stephen Graham Jones, parts of ‘House of Leaves’ by Mark Z. Danielewski, and ‘The Dionaea House’ by Eric Heisserer (which is not a book at all but a web-based text horror of sorts, like an interactive precursor to the modern creepypasta). The stories that are quoted at the header of each chapter actually made up a big part of the inspiration for that fic. Plus I’d never written horror before, so I wanted to get a sense of the pacing.

There are a lot of non-fanfic authors I like, but that I can’t say I’ve tried to crib styles off of them, necessarily. I do tend to read things that are similar in feel to what I like to write, so more character-driven than plot-driven. I love Maggie Stiefvater’s The Raven Cycle, but I could never properly emulate anything she does. I really like anything that has that magical realism feel, so Helen Oyeyemi, Gabriel Garcia Marquez, Jorge Luis Borges are some favorites. And I prefer short stories over novels. My favorite short story ever is ‘Story of your Life’ by Ted Chiang, but I could never, ever, ever hope to replicate the genius of that concept, and it’s a plot reveal that’s only really effective once.

T: Any fandom tropes you can’t stand?

(answered here)

fanfic ask game!

#answered #ask meme #nonbinarymerbabe

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sympathyfortheblinderdevil · 5 years

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All is Fair

Oh, Dear God. I’ve had an idea for a fic. Tommy is bored with his OBE, MP life. In an attempt to cheer him up, Ada invites him to a fundraising soiree she has organized, and Tommy becomes horny intrigued by a bright young thing.

“I’ve lined up Picassos, Muchas, a couple of Lalique glass figures — lots of up and coming artists.” Ada paced back and forth before Tommy, counting on her fingers the artists whose work would be shown at the charity auction she’d helped to organize for the Grace Shelby Institute. “I snapped them up for a song, but with the crowd I’ve invited all trying to outdo one another they will bring in thousands…” Ada stopped mid-step and stared at her brother. He had insisted on meeting her before the start of business, and after summoning her at such an ungodly hour he didn’t seem to be listening to a single word she said.

“Tommy. Oi, Tommy! Are you listening to me?”

Tommy had been listening. He absorbed every word spoken in his presence, even while he seemed a million miles away. Smoke from a dwindling cigarette curled in a graceful column before his eyes. He was mentally weighing how much money the auction would bring against the amount in his charity reserve account. Of course, he could singlehandedly fund the Institute with the stroke of a pen and skip this whole event, but that wasn’t the point. Publicity was important, and Ada had arranged for all the right people to be seen at his party. That was the point. He knew the rules of the game, but it weighed heavily on him. He was bored with pretending to care about the issues and opinions of the upper-middle class. He craved the gritty realism of Small Heath; the honest observations of the working class meant more to him than the relentless droning of his new peers.

“Yep, Ada, got it,” he sighed as he stood up from his desk and pulled on his jacket. He crossed the room to where she stood and lit another cigarette, seemingly forgetting the one he left burning in the ashtray on his desk. “It should be a resounding success. Thank you for all of your hard work.”

In the clear light of day, Ada could see the strain of the last few years playing out on her brother’s face. His pale blue eyes used to snap with electricity, but now they were slower, deeper, and more contemplative. Not quite sad, but worn and weary. “I know it’s hard for you to go to these things, Tommy, but I’ve invited some bright young people who will make it a bit more bearable. Who knows? You might have fun,” she shrugged and smiled hopefully.

The energy that it took to keep up the façade of a legitimate businessman and Member of Parliament had sapped every ounce of fun from his life. “That wouldn’t be fair, now would it?” he mumbled as he stepped out into the hall and out the door.

***

“Lia, wake up!”

Sunlight streamed in through the window, painting the backs of Lia’s eyelids pink and warming her face. She had stayed up late talking with her cousin the night before, catching up on family gossip and getting the lowdown on her new job.

“Five more minutes,” she mumbled and pulled the sheet over her face. Her mind lazily drifted to thoughts of the upcoming day. She was to train as an assistant librarian; a position made possible by her cousin’s connections at City Hall. Even though she was grateful for the job, the temptation of a few more minutes’ sleep was tough to resist.

“Now! It takes a while to get across town. I stuck my neck out to get you this job, and I won’t have you being late on your first day.”

The rapidly approaching clacking of high heels on hardwood let Lia know that her cousin Jenny meant business, so she threw back the covers and groaned. “I’ll be ready in fifteen minutes.”

“You’d better be,” Jenny called. “I’ve got fresh scones and tea.”

Jenny’s two up two down in Small Heath, Birmingham was like all the others in her street, except where the other houses were filled to capacity with large families, hers was all but empty. Her mom and dad had moved back to the country, and her brothers were off with their own families, so in order to stave off loneliness, she wrote to invite her favorite cousin to come live with her in Birmingham. “It will be great fun, and there’s a position coming open at the library. They promised to hold it for you. After receiving the letter, Lia and her family decided that the change would do her good. The country was stifling Lia. If she stayed, she had no prospects for anything other than marriage to a local farmer and a brood of children. Birmingham meant freedom and adventure for the restless young woman, so she went.

The pale yellow frock Lia wore stood in sharp contrast to the sooty dark patterned wallpaper in the kitchen. At one time it must’ve been green with pink flowers, Lia mused as she sipped her tea which was the approximate color of the flowers on the wall.

Jenny laid a plate of scones down on the table and eyed her cousin. “You’ll need to get darker dresses, Lia. The mud and soot of Small Heath will make a hash of that.”

Lia rolled her eyes and smiled, “I plan on doing just that with my first paycheck. In the meantime, maybe I should help myself to your closet.”

“Not with those knockers you won’t,” Jenny teased. It felt good to have her cousin in the house, and despite the early hour, they were both in the mood to laugh.

Jenny sipped at her tea and flipped through the morning post until one envelope, in particular, caught her attention. Her lips moved as she whispered under her breath, and her eyes read and reread the writing on the heavily embossed card.

“What’s that?”

“My boss has forwarded an invitation to me. It’s for an art auction at the Grace Shelby Institute.” Jenny’s eyes were wide. “Oh, my God, I can’t believe I’ve been invited!”

“That’s great! Wait, do you have to go with your boss?”

“No, it’s my own invitation, and I get to bring a guest.”

The name Shelby rang a bell with Lia. Jenny read the look on her face and lowered her voice as if Arthur Shelby himself were lurking just outside her door. “Yeah, those Shelbys. But they’ve gone legit. The leader is even an MP now.”

Lia arched an eyebrow, “Legit? How exactly does a razor gang go legit?”

“The Shelbys can bloody well do whatever they want, and we are going to this event. It means a lot to get invited to these things, and I need to show that I can fit in.”

***

The pale blue dress that Lia wore had a low cut back and fringe at the knee, not at all the stuff of a librarian’s wardrobe. She had worn it to a formal engagement party the year before and had been pining away for a reason to wear it again. In a room full of tweeds and sensible shoes, she was a flash of blue sky on a stormy day. Her cousin dressed to blend in with the crowd—perfect for a work event, and Jenny was certainly all business tonight.

While Jenny circulated around the room, Lia availed herself of several glasses of champagne and studied the paintings on offer. As the daughter of a farmer, she had not had many chances to go to museums and galleries, but she loved art and soaked up everything she could read about it. There was an amazing selection of work at the Institute including a cubist piece by Picasso, but what really caught her eye was a group of Art Nouveau paintings by Alphonse Mucha. She stood, sipping her champagne and smiling at a depiction of a woman in a gracefully flowing gown on a backdrop of stars.

“Spectacular, isn’t it?” A sweet feminine voice with a Brummie lilt drew her out of her reverie. Lia turned around to see a woman with porcelain skin, dark bobbed hair, and piercing blue eyes extend a hand toward her.

“Ada Thorne, and you are…”

“Lia Montrose,” she managed to answer in a relatively confident manner. Jenny had mentioned the Shelby’s sister on the way there, but Lia never thought she’d end up in a conversation with her.

“Pleased to make your acquaintance. You know, at most of these things people only glance at the paintings and then try to make business deals for the rest of the night. It’s nice to see someone actually appreciate the art for a change.”

She held up a perfectly manicured finger in the direction of a waiter who immediately brought over a tray of drinks. “Champagne?” She handed Lia a fresh glass without waiting for an answer and then took one for herself. She smiled conspiratorially and raised an eyebrow. “Have you seen the Max Ernst yet?”

“You have an Ernst?” Lia asked, her mouth hanging open for a moment before she realized and closed it.

“Yeah, it’s in the next room. Come on.” She hooked her arm in Lia’s and led her to the next room where, indeed, the promised painting hung.

“It’s bloody amazing,” Lia whispered.

“I probably shouldn’t say this, but I’m sure you could have it for a song. None of the tossers here will recognize its significance.” Ada gently shook her head, and the rubies around her neck caught the light. Lia blushed and looked down. She had not near enough to even make a starting bid on any of the artwork. Ada led Lia around talking about the various works up for auction. She was genuine and warm. Not at all what Lia imagined a Shelby would be like. When Lia explained that she couldn’t actually buy any of the art because she had just started a job as a librarian, Ada commiserated with her about the low pay.

“I was a librarian myself for a time. If it weren’t for my brother Tommy… well, let’s just say I know what it’s like to live on a librarian’s pay...and much, much less”

Ada didn’t expand on her role at Shelby Company Limited, except to say she dealt in imports and exports, and Lia didn’t pry. Even though Ada spoke with a candid ebullience, it seemed safer not to ask questions. As they were discussing the merits of public reading rooms a man entered by a side door and motioned for Ada to come over. “Oh, dear. If you’ll excuse me, I should go to make sure that everything is running smoothly. It was so nice meeting, you Lia.”

“Likewise Mrs. Thorne.”

“Call me Ada,” she warmly smiled and was on her way.

Lia was positively buzzing. She had lost track of time and of how much champagne she had quaffed while talking to Ada. She squinted across the hall into the main room and scanned the crowd for Jenny, who was nowhere to be found. Unbeknownst to her, someone had been watching in admiration as she strolled along.

Another Picasso caught her eye, and she stood squinting and biting her bottom lip as she looked at it. She was so astonished by the colors and lines that she hardly noticed the gentleman who had come to stand beside her and ask her what she thought of it.

“Vastly overrated. I much prefer his blue period...”

As she spoke, she turned to find herself under the gaze of the bluest eyes she’d ever seen. He took her in with an intensity that was slightly lessened when he raised one corner of his mouth and tilted his head a bit. His voice was a low, raspy rumble and Lia felt it in her gut when he tutted and spoke again.

“If our Ada were here, she’d tell you all about how it represents the chaos of war and the destruction wrought by the powerful…how mechanization renders people obsolete…turns us into interchangeable parts.”

Lia stared at him as her mind lurched toward the realization that maybe she shouldn’t have been so candid. Our Ada? “Are you…”

He turned his whole body to face her. “Thomas Shelby. It’s a pleasure to make your acquaintance, Mrs…”

As he kissed her hand her breath caught in her throat. She was toe to toe with the most powerful man in Birmingham, and his warm soft lips were currently on her skin. Tommy did not fail to notice the little shiver of electricity that passed between them.

“Miss… Miss Lia Montrose, and the pleasure is all mine.” The heat from his lips on her hand made its way up to her cheeks. She cleared her throat and swirled the champagne in her glass. “Great party.”

“Party, event, fundraiser, no matter what you call it it’s all about separating this lot from their money. Since my Picasso is shite, tell me, which ones do you like?” There was a hint of mischief in his voice as he spoke.

Tommy liked that there was something different about her. She was younger than the usual patrons of local charities, but the difference seemed to do more with the light in her eyes as she surveyed the room. Bright. The word Ada had used to describe their special guests sprang to his mind. She was one of those bright young things who Ada invited to try to make him have fun. There was a distinct lack of pretense in the way she carried herself. She had spent the evening looking at and chatting about art instead of business, and her honest reaction to his question did not surprise him in the least.

Lia giggled a little and apologized. “I didn’t mean to insult your taste in art, Mr. Shelby…”

“Call me Tommy.” He lazily caressed her body with his eyes.

“…I didn’t know who you were when you asked me.” Lia’s voice quivered, betraying her surprise at the bold way he was looking at her. After all, he was Tommy Shelby, and she was taken aback by the open way in which he was flirting with her.

He took a step closer and raised his eyebrows. “Had you known, would it have changed your answer?”

Lia bit her lip and fought back a smile before answering, “Well, no, but I would have used a bit more tact.” She looked up through her lashes at him.

Tommy held her gaze and waited for her to answer what he had asked previously. She seemed a bit dazed, so he repeated the question. “Which ones do you like?”

She glanced around the room, gathering her thoughts and began, “I really like the Mucha paintings. They are much more organic in how they reflect the beauty found in nature and…” As she trailed off, she realized that Mr. Shelby was still looking directly at her. His unwavering attention coupled with the champagne made it very hard for her to concentrate.

Tommy could see that she was having some difficulty in expressing herself, and he was having quite a lot of fun teasing her. He narrowed his eyes and ran his tongue along his lips. “What makes you think the Picasso is shite?” he asked in an exaggeratingly sincere voice.

She drained her champagne. Liquid courage could only help her current situation. “Personal preference, I suppose. It’s ridiculous,” She leaned closer to him in a conspiratorial manner. “It’s overwrought and pretentious.”

As soon as the words left her mouth Jenny came into view. Her eyes were huge as she gingerly approached Lia and Mr. Shelby.

“Oh, Jenny, let me introduce you to Tommy. We’ve been discussing his art collection.”

Tommy offered a warm greeting to Jenny, who hid her surprise as best she could. “Mr. Shelby, thank you for extending an invitation to my cousin and me.”

“My pleasure. The fine work you’re doing for our city has not gone unnoticed, and I’m happy to show my appreciation. Do you have opinions on art, Miss Montrose? Your cousin is partial to Mucha.”

Lia giggled and smiled up at Tommy, “Well, yeah, of course, I prefer him to Picasso.”

Jenny’s eyes shifted from Lia to Tommy and back again, as she could hardly believe what she was seeing. There was an obvious attraction between them. Lia was fresh from the country and had no way of knowing the gravity of the situation she’d stumbled into. But Jenny did.

She took the empty champagne glass from her cousin’s hand and placed it on a passing tray, “Thank you so much for your hospitality, Mr. Shelby, but we must be going.”

Lia frowned, and Tommy’s demeanor cooled as he turned to face Jenny. “Won’t you stay for the auction?”

“We would love to, but…” Jenny’s excuse was mercifully cut short by an announcement that the auction was beginning.

Tommy shifted his attention back to Lia and slowly shook his head, “It’s a shame, you know. I could use your expertise to run up the bids.”

Lia looked over her shoulder as she walked toward the door and smiled sweetly, “That wouldn’t be fair, now would it, Mr. Shelby.”

#peaky blinders #tommy shelby #peaky blinders fic #peaky blinders fiction #peaky blinders fanfiction #tommy shelby x oc

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the-kings-of-games · 4 years

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i’m not popular enough to get tons of asks, but I pushing off zine work and secret santa so fanfic writer asks! (YGO only)

1. What’s your favorite character(s) to write for?

Answered here

2. What character(s) do you find the most difficult to write for? Why?

Characters that don’t get much of a reaction from me from the beginning or at any point, and characters I have never considered writing before (like Bruno). Never feel like I’d write them so I never put thought in their character and stories.

3. Do you have a favorite scene you’ve written from [Fanfic Name] story/chapter?

Yeah, from Two Fingers Crossed Over Your Lips, Chapter 8: Domestics (Orinthoptershipping). It’s when Crow is laying on top of Bruno on the couch, and they share a kiss. Crow is flirty, and Bruno is cute. I think this is the best example of my portrayal of Crow, lol.

4. Did you have any ideas that didn’t make the final cut of [Fanfic Name]?

No, for the most part, I end up using pretty much everything I write out. I’m the kind of person to go back and cut out entire scenes because I tend to write out scenes I like/want to do and find ways to connect them together. It can be kind of counterproductive because some scenes might actually pull you away from the plot you wanted, but I never never plot before I write, lol.

It doesn’t mean, however, that that I have never ended up writing something bigger than I expected. Currently, it’s The Supreme King’s Husband (Prologue) because I just wanted to add in Yūsei and Kizuna, omgs. QWQ

5. Do you listen to music when writing?

Yes, I do. It both keeps me focused and distracted at the same time.

6. If you listen to music when writing, what [do] you listening to when writing [Fanfic Name]?

A lot of Joji, Jack Strauder, Oliver Tree, CUCO, and the like. Pretty much this mix.

7. What story/headcanons do you feel the proudest of?

I really love my headcanon of Crow being masculine leaning genderfluid afab (assigned female at birth). It’s really fun exploring this headcanon, and I always write Crow with this in mind. However, it’s only 5D’s Crow, not Arc-V Crow. They are both Crow but, in a lot of ways, are essentially two different characters, and I’m very attached to the former. Crow didn’t start doing he/him stuff until he was, like, nine, and Yūsei and Jack have been super supportive about it since the beginning. Crow was she one day, and he the next day. Still Crow. ^^ This is from one of my many Crow WIPs:

"It doesn’t matter how I look or what I call myself, I’d always be their friend, and they’d always be my brothers. The bond we share is irreplaceable, and I’m thankful to have met them in the first place. They’ve always supported me, and they know it’s my right to tell people about me, when and how. If I wanted it to be different, they’d be the first one to know. As it is right now, though, I’m happy with the way I am."

Crow has two feminine outfits he wears occasionally: a yellow dress with red flats (a gift from his girls), and a yellow blouse with a green plaid skirt and black knee highs. To go with these looks, he wears his hair down with his headband around his neck and shiny lip loss Trudge bought for him.

8. Do you prefer writing one-shots or multi chaptered stories?

One-shots by a long shot, lmao. That being said, I sometimes don’t finish one-shots either.

9. If you had to assign a theme song to [Fanfic Name], which would you assign?

I don’t think in music. I do that thing where you pick a song and write a fic with it but not the other way around.

10. What is the line you’re proudest of from [Fanfic Name]?

One of my favorites, from the aforementioned Chapter 8: Domestics (Ornitoptershipping):

Closing his eyes, Bruno was taken back to the beach, the one he woke up at with no memories, but this time, he didn't feel the confusion, nor the faint touch of grief at the bottom of his heart. Instead, he only felt the quiet crash of the waves on his skin, the sun shining brightly over his head. This was now a memory he remembered twice.

(I really like this one-shot a lot, lol.)

11. How would you describe your style? (Character/emotion/action-driven, etc)

A lot of dialogue, stream of conscious narrative. I think. I never really thought about it.

12. Who is your favorite author?

I don’t really have one at the moment. I don’t read a lot, lol.

13. When did you start writing fanfic?

I got more serious about it in high school, but I think I started during middle school? KHR was a thing then, lol.

14. How do you feel about your older work?

Answered here

15. What is the fanfic you’ve written that you’re most proud of?

From YGO, probably The Distance of Time which features Orinthoptershipping. It’s very dialogue heavy, but it was a lot of fun. I’m very thankful of the people who took the time to read it, and even more those who commented and gave feedback.

16. What fanfic tropes do you avoid writing for?

I don’t do gore, violence, or torture. I don’t dislike them, I just don’t write them (so I don’t have any practice either).

17. What fanfic tropes do you gravitate to writing for?

I love ones that explore the idea of soulmates. I’m a big fan of the soulmates AU, but I love the different ways that people just complete each other that borders on more realism than trope. I mostly write fluff though, and attempts at humor because I think I’m funny.

18. Do you prefer editing as you write, or waiting until it’s finished?

I edit as a I write, which is bad because I don’t edit afterwards and miss typos (lol) and sometimes makes writing take longer to finish.

19. What words do you think you tend to use the most?

Epithets probably; otherwise, I don’t know.

20. What feedback makes you the happiest to hear?

I love comments that think my pacing is good and my character interpretations are great. If someone tells me that they can imagine this happening in canon, I’m over the moon.

21. Is there an idea you’ve always wanted to write, but haven’t yet?

Yes, and they’re all WIPs.

22. Do you enjoy making OCs for your fanfics, or prefer sticking to canon characters?

I mostly stick to canon characters and don’t like doing OCs (unless they’re extras or side characters). Writing OCs makes me a little uncomfortable actually because I fear veering into self-inserts which I cannot write because that’s even worse than doing OCs. The only OCs I like do are OC babies of my favorite ships.

For YGO, I currently have two: Sky Hogan, the daughter of Crow (Papa), Jack (Father), and Yūsei (Dad); and Mira Princeton, the daughter of Chazz (Mama) and Jaden (Dad).

23. How much do you stick to canon?

I try to write characters based off of canon as much as possible. If I don’t see a character doing something, then I don’t write them doing that thing. I’m more about filling in blank spaces than trying to rewrite inked ones.

24. Do you prefer AUs with the characters, or sticking to the original universe?

I do original universe most of the time.

25. What scene in [Fanfic Name] took the longest to write? What was difficult about it?

Smut scenes because they are pretty much one continuous scene, lololol. There’s no scene changes for the most part, so keeping up momentum is a must and a difficulty.

26. Are titles for your stories easy to come up with?

I suck at making titles. I can have whole fics done but back petal so hard because I forgot to give it title.

27. What time of day do you prefer to write?

Past bedtime.

28. Is there a part of [Fanfic Name] you’re surprised no one has picked up on yet?

I’m not sure what this is asking, lol.

29. What part of the writing process do you enjoy the most? (Brainstorming, outlining, writing, editing, etc)

Writing it. I don’t brainstorm or outline, I just write what comes to mind. I brainstorm only if I need to connect things together. Finishing it is a close second.

30. Do you write down all your ideas? What makes you decide to write one versus the other?

I never write down my ideas; it’s either I start on a WIP or I don’t. What I decide to write depends on my mood.

31. What was the development process of [Fanfic Name] like?

I write for three hours and produce only a thousand words, smh. Agony.

32. What story do you think showcases your signature style the most?

Fluff with subtle angst, I guess.

33. Have you ever stopped yourself from writing something? Why?

Yes, because I already have so many WIPs, I shouldn’t start on another one. (Does this stop me? No.)

34. Have you felt emotional while writing a scene before? What scene was it?

I might have, but I have terrible memory. U_U

35. Where’s your favorite place to write?

In my bed in the dark, on my phone. (Computers tire me out after a while.)

36. What fanfic of yours has the symbolism you’re proudest of?

I’m not sure what symbolism is.

37. Would you ever collaborate with another writer for a story?

Yes, but it will be a really big learning experience because I’m using to have most, if not all, control over my writing. I try to be open, but getting used to new things is hard, you know?

38. What story of yours are you surprised that people liked as much as they did?

Honestly, for YGO, any of them. The feedback for YGO isn’t a lot, lol, or it’s because I write characters/ships/tropes a lot of people don’t go for? I’m just glad I now know the people who like my stuff. I know my writing is good, but I won’t force people to read it.

39. What area of writing do you feel strongest in?

Characterization, if I’m not being too big-headed, lol.

40. What area of writing do you want to improve in?

I need to stop feeling the urge to rush ending and give the settings more details.

#yugioh #Kizunashipping #ornithoptershipping #i have three zines and one secret santa on my to-do list #lmao #im lazy but like to talk about myself #i do indeed have a big head #Flame muses

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aion-rsa · 4 years

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How Arachnophobia Became the Perfect Creepy Crawly Horror Comedy

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There’s a moment in Arachnophobia where Jeff Daniels’ Dr Ross Jennings, lying in bed one night worried his new hometown of Canaima is under attack from venomous spiders, spots an eight-legged intruder lurking in plain sight on his bedroom wall. The scene builds to a terrifying crescendo when the panic-stricken Jennings, who has a pathological fear of spiders, decides to confront the arachnid – only to discover it’s a coat hook.

It’s a prime example of the power Arachnophobia still possesses, 30 years on from its release. The power to have audiences breaking out in cold sweats one minute and fits of laughter the next.

The story of an ordinary American town that becomes infested with a deadly new species of spider unwittingly transported over from the Amazon rainforest, Arachnophobia might have been a very different prospect in the hands of another filmmaker.

Fortunately, Arachnophobia had Frank Marshall at the helm.

A long-time producer who had worked with everyone from Orson Welles to Martin Scorsese prior to founding Amblin Entertainment with his wife Kathleen Kennedy and long-time collaborator Steven Spielberg, Arachnophobia represented Marshall’s directorial debut. In many ways, he couldn’t have picked a better project.

Never work with animals and children

While the old Hollywood adage claimed you should never work with children or animals, Marshall had an impressive track record with both – especially animals. He had overseen the uses of several snakes in Raiders of the Lost Ark as well as Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom and orchestrated the plague of rats that pop up in the sewers of Venice during Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade.

More importantly, like Spielberg, he wasn’t averse to cranking up the PG scares whether it be a melting Nazi or the desiccated corpse of a spider bite victim. The key to cooking up a scare in Arachnophobia, however, were the arachnids themselves.

Marshall and his production team auditioned a variety of spiders for the film, whittling it down to a shortlist of four distinct species, including wolf spiders, tarantulas, and huntsman spiders.

“I held what I called the Spider Olympics,” he explained in an interview with Amblin. “I really put them through their paces to see if they could climb a glass, if they looked scary, to see how big they were or if they looked good on camera and how we could motivate them.”

He eventually settled on three-inch wide Delena spiders; a huntsman arachnid native to Australia that had arrived in New Zealand in the 1920s.

Hundreds of little Marlon Brandos

Over 300 were shipped to the US for filming, with more arachnids added as filming continued.

“We had a spider condominium where we had different drawers with spiders that could climb better than others and some that were faster than others. It was really a science of different spider actors.”

A variety of techniques were used to direct the spiders. Hot and cold air proved effective while the crew also hit on the use of Lemon Pledge cleaner to help guide their movements.

In some of the more complex shots, microscopic leashes and tiny steel plates were used but even they had their limitations. Even so, takes regularly ran into the double digits with the film’s arachnid performers guilty of going off script like a bunch of eight-legged Marlon Brandos.

Sometimes things went like clockwork, like the scene where spiders begin to burst out of a bathroom sink.

“We blew hot air and they came bursting out of the drain,” Marshall said. “I never dreamed they would just explode.”

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Other times, however, it proved difficult, with the director citing the scene in which the town coroner and his wife are offed when a rogue arachnid gets inside their bowl of popcorn.

Marshall said: “The popcorn was probably the hardest one and in the shot that we got, the spider comes out and we follow it. That’s all ad-libbed by the spider.”

It required meticulous planning on Marshall’s part and a wealth of patience from stars like Daniels, who acknowledged to the New York Times that it took a “special kind of actor” to work with spiders. It was all worth it though.

The practical approach proved crucial, imbuing Arachnophobia with a sense of realism and a timeless quality missing from the many CGI-led spider monstrosities that have followed in the years since. Not that Marshall was averse to a little technical wizardry though.

While a real-life Amazonian bird-eating tarantula was cast as larger spider credited as “The General” in the movie and known as “Big Bob” on set, Marshall knew the arachnid was neither big enough for some of the film’s stunts nor trained enough to pull off many of the film’s crucial scenes – including any and all close-ups.

Instead, a 15-inch mechanical spider was built in his place by then-rookie special effect whizz Jamie Hyneman, who would go on to find fame on the TV series Mythbusters.

While the handling of the spiders was crucial, Marshall also understood the importance of grounding Arachnophobia in reality was equally important. That required two crucial elements: good casting and relatable set pieces.

Killer casting

One of Arachnophobia’s strengths lies in the fact the film takes the time to establish characters and setting before tearing the whole thing apart with a childlike glee. For Marshall, setting out the stall of the movie was crucial to cranking up the scares – and the fun.

“What’s important in all of these movies is you’ve got to care about the characters,” he told Amblin. “I tried to cast really great actors in the character parts and the smaller parts. I did feel it needed a little bit of comic relief in this story because it was going to be so creepy.”

Populating the town’s doomed cast of characters with seasoned performers like Henry Jones and Mary Carver as well as comedic actors like Stuart Pankin and Peter Jason proved a masterstroke and ensured, by the time the spiders were closing in, you actually cared for their safety. When the arachnids did descend, it was often to disrupt an otherwise familiar scene of life in small town USA: a garden party, a night in watching Jeopardy or a football practice. In another nightmarish set piece, the town’s soon to retire doctor is bitten by a spider hiding in his slippers.

“I thought what’s scariest to people is everyday common things that we all would freak out by,” Marshall said. “I know that every morning when I get up to put on my slippers, I still shake them off.”

In the wrong hands, Arachnophobia could easily have become a straightforward enough horror movie – and, for a brief period at least, it was. According to Jeff Daniels, when he first signed on the film was a far more serious affair.

“You could tell that the lines were kind of written by computer,” he told the Philadelphia Daily News.

With time ticking on both Daniels and Marshall eager for the film to have a streak of black comedy running through it, producer Kathleen Kennedy went in search of help. In December of 1988, she found it in Wesley Strick.

Low-hanging fruit

By then filming had already begun on the movie, with work complete on all of the scenes charting photographer Jerry Manley’s horrifying death at the hands of a spider in the jungles of Venezuela and subsequent transportation back to the US with an arachnid in tow.

Strick had been working with Spielberg on the script for a remake of Cape Fear. When he got the call from Kennedy, he was settling in for a quiet Christmas with his wife and young children. He didn’t know it yet, but Christmas was about to be cancelled.

“Kathleen called and asked: ‘do you have holiday plans? Would you be available to work for two or three weeks on a film called Arachnophobia for my husband, Frank Marshall?’ It sounded like fun and I was stuck at home, so I said yeah,” Strick tells Den of Geek.

Arachnophobia had been in development long before Marshall took charge and, with time ticking on, Kennedy felt it would be beneficial for Strick to glance through some of the previous revisions of screenwriter Don Jakoby’s original script. There were quite a few revisions, as it turned out.

“A messenger showed up from Amblin with basically a massive box full of scripts,” Strick says. “I had never seen so many drafts. It had been in development for a long time. She sent me like 12 scripts that had been written over two years.”

Strick immediately identified the issue.

“The early drafts were both funny and horrific. But by the time I got to the draft they were working with I could see they had developed out most of the horror and the humor. This kind of thing happens in development because studios often seek clarity over entertainment. They believe the audience should be spoon-fed everything.”

But without “the horror and the humor” Arachnophobia wasn’t working.

“In this instance, however, the changes had ended up flattening out the plot in an effort to make the story clear,” Strick says. “They forgot that it also needed to be funny and scary. In these prolonged development situations, people kind of lose focus on what it is they are really trying to do while trying to solve very literal problems. That’s why it’s beneficial to have another writer come in with a fresh eye. Someone who hasn’t been worn down by two years of search and can fix what got broken by accident.”

Something else that jumped out at him too – nobody in the script had arachnophobia.

“That struck me as a huge missed opportunity,” he says. “It was such low-hanging fruit. I started to question my own sanity like, how could they have missed that? So, I called Frank and Kathleen and said ‘hey nobody has arachnophobia; do you not think Ross Jennings should have arachnophobia? And they were both quiet and just kind of said ‘well do you?’ and I said ‘Yeah’ and they were like ‘well go do that’”

While Strick acknowledges such changes come off as “screenwriter 101 stuff”, the decision to make Jeff Daniels’s character an arachnophobe proved crucial in tying the plot together.

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“It helps the movie a lot. It became the dramatic arc of the story,” Strick says. “Things like the moment, early in the film, when Dr Jennings recalls how he became an arachnophobe after a spider crawled up his body as a child. That plays out again in the final act, when he’s pinned down and ‘the general’ is crawling over him. He’s forced to overcome that primal fear. Those moments play great and provide the spine of the picture. Without it, I don’t know how the story would play. It would be a series of set pieces. Maybe that would have been good enough but it’s hard to imagine it without that through line.”

Strick’s role was also to reinvigorate some of what had been lost in the multiple drafts, in an editing process known as “punching up.” The screenwriter and script doctor explains it perfectly in the context of Arachnophobia.

“With a film like this, you were essentially building a ride at a theme park,” he says. “You want to deliver thrills so there needs to be a forward momentum to it. It can’t meander. The dialogue has to crackle. That’s how movies entertain. I am always looking to focus scenes. Often, you read lots of scenes that are fine and have a clear point, but the dialogue isn’t focused. That’s where polishing comes in. It’s looking at every single line and making sure it’s right down to the number of syllables. With Arachnophobia, I had to liven it up. Add some energy and a bit of humor.”

Over the course of three weeks, Strick worked in a garage converted into a makeshift office, “punching up” the script.

“There was a lot of pressure because it was already in production but I had a sense of what was needed,” he said. “Even so, it was a little dicey. There was a lot hanging on it.”

Good times and Goodman

Both Kennedy and Marshall were thrilled with the changes Strick made. It struck a chord with Marshall’s desire to make Arachnophobia more like a ghost train ride at an amusement park than a night in a haunted house.

“I liked his dialogue and he wrote creepy scenes,” Marshall later told Amblin. “I thought that was fun… he wrote good characters.”

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Daniels echoed that sentiment, explaining to the Orlando Sentinel how the fresh injection of comedy helped the film ebb and flow.

“We approached it as a comedy with a couple of thrills,” he said. “We knew we had the thrills in there, so we worked hard to make sure the movie had a sense of humour about itself.”

The humor, he said, “kind of relaxes the audience, so that we can come in and get them again.”

Strick ended up staying involved in the project, albeit in a removed capacity – Marshall would occasionally phone him from the set to bounce around ideas. Whether he can be credited for John Goodman’s performance is up for debate, though he did write several of his lines. Goodman’s cameo remains a source of some contention among Arachnophobia fans. Riding high off the success of Roseanne at the time, it was Spielberg who suggested Goodman appear as exterminator Delbert McClintock.

Marshall had been eager to inject some humor into the proceedings but Goodman’s exaggerated performance – supposedly based on a real-life exterminator he knew and an old science teacher – jars with the straight-faced approach seen elsewhere.

Testing and Box Office

Not that it mattered all that much to movie-goers.

“I went to a few test screenings and the whole audience would be shrieking and just generally reacting,” Strick says.

Those test screenings did pick up one issue though, the original ending, which saw the film conclude immediately after the spider nest is destroyed, fell flat. It was Strick who came up with the idea of showing that the family had moved back to San Francisco.

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“They wanted something they could shoot in one day. It had to be simple.”

Billed as the first “thrill-omedy” – a term widely ridiculed by the press at the time – Arachnophobia went on to enjoy modest success at the box office, drawing $53.2 million off a budget of $22 million.

Strick has his own theory for why the film underwhelmed.

“I remember my younger sister, Charlotte, told me she couldn’t see it because she was too scared of spiders. I realized a lot of women felt like that. They say when couples go to the movies it’s the female that picks the movies. I’m not sure if that’s true but that’s gospel in Hollywood. I worried that if women were afraid to see it men wouldn’t either.”

In any case, like many films of the era, Arachnophobia went on to enjoy a second life on video, helped by some standout scares that proved popular with the rewind/slow-motion generation of VHS hounds.

Remake

While Strick tends to avoid revisiting his own work, he was pleasantly surprised when rewatching Arachnophobia.

“I was reluctant to watch it again in case it was a relic of another era of Hollywood but it’s still loads of fun,” he says. “My wife was jumping and shrieking and she’s the ideal audience because she’s terrified with spiders. It’s a very funny movie and yet a lot of people die.”

With talk of a potential remake on the way, Strick has one bit of advice: “Don’t do it”.

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“I don’t especially see how or why they would need to remake it for a modern audience. There is something timeless about the original and the way we made it.”

30 years later, Arachnophobia remains a true one-off. A film equal parts horror and comedy and one that would fall flat if either side hadn’t been up to muster. In that sense it’s wholly unique and might be better off staying that way.

The post How Arachnophobia Became the Perfect Creepy Crawly Horror Comedy appeared first on Den of Geek.

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#aion-rsa #Den of Geek

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sophieakatz · 4 years

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Thursday Thoughts: Writing Advice (Part 3 of 3)

And here is the final part!

I recently stumbled across this writer ask meme about pieces of writing advice, and I was having so much fun thinking about it that I decided to just respond to them all!

33. Embrace structure

Yes, yes, yes. Embrace structure. This is not the same thing as being limited by structure. It’s easy to mistake the two.

I spoke before about the importance of familiarity. People enjoy and respond to familiar structures. “Once upon a time” and “happily ever after” are still common phrases for a reason. They work. They’re familiar. People like them. Structure means that you don’t have to reinvent the wheel.

I also spoke before about leaning into the limitations of a medium. Having a structure to follow gives you something to lean on, while at the same time it forces you to be creative! Structure is yet another example of rules to learn so that you can know when to break them.

34. Dialogue should be purposeful

I like this rule, but I think it’s easily misunderstood.

When people hear “purposeful,” they think “plot important.” So, they end up writing something in which everyone says exactly what they mean all the time, with perfect bluntness.

But people don’t always talk like that. People beat around the bush. People make jokes. People run out of things to say and point out funny-shaped cracks in the sidewalk.

A line of dialogue can have purpose other than furthering the plot. It can set the mood. It can establish a character as a bit scatterbrained. It can demonstrate that two characters are not comfortable or open with each other. (“How are you?” “Fine. You?” “Fine.” “Right.”) It can give your audience a break from the tension.

Write with purpose, yes, but don’t feel obligated for every word to be “purposeful.”

35. Be empathetic

Empathy is at the heart of storytelling. Through writing, you can create an experience for your readers which did not actually happen to them, but it means as much to them as if it had. This can be an immensely powerful exercise in empathy.

Creating a character is another great exercise in empathy. Have you created a person for your readers to connect with, or a stereotype to drive marginalized readers away?

Your readers are people. Your fellow writers are people. Your characters are also people. Treat them all with empathy.

36. Never use a verb other than ‘said’ to tag dialogue

Only a Sith deals in absolutes.

Again, all words are tools, and all words have a purpose. “Said” is a perfectly nice word; don’t be afraid to use it. But other words can convey different things to the scene.

“What did you do?” she said. (Neutral – we know she’s curious, but that’s it.)

“What did you do?” she shouted. (Wow, okay, this person is upset about whatever happened.)

“What did you do?” she whispered. (Ooh, it must be a secret!)

“What did you do?” she muttered. (She may be asking reluctantly – probably rolling her eyes, too.)

Use whatever word conveys what you need the moment to convey.

37. Do not start a sentence with a conjunction

Conjunctions are tools. Use them wisely.

Consider the medium, the audience, and the pacing. And then decide whether to start a sentence with a conjunction.

See, I just did so there – “and” is a conjunction. It works very well for the kind of train of thought writing I use in these blog posts. In more formal writing, you will want to avoid starting sentences with conjunctions.

But starting with a conjunction (oops, I did it again) is a good way to put your readers right into a character’s mind, to speed things up and make things feel urgent.

Learn the rules of grammar, and then you will know how and when you can break them.

38. A new speaker always gets a new paragraph

According to most structures, yes. Are there contexts in which you might break this rule? Sure.

But keep in mind that people expect new paragraphs for clarity. If you’re going to break a rule, break it with purpose, not just ‘cause you wanna.

39. If there’s a story you want to read but it hasn’t been written yet, you must write it

“Must,” huh? I don’t like the word “must,” as much as I like the general sentiment here.

A lot of what I write are stories which I wish I had had when I was little. This is especially true when I write about asexuality. I wish it hadn’t taken me until college to learn that it was an option. All I needed was one explicitly ace character.

Practically speaking, though, I’m not only writing these stories for my past self. I’m writing for other people.

When I write fanfiction about characters figuring out that they are asexual, readers leave comments thanking me for it – because they needed the story as much as my past self did.

I don’t see the point of telling people that they “must” write the stories they want to read, because not everyone is a writer. More people are readers than writers. And these readers absolutely have a right to get up and say, “I want more stories about people like me!”

40. The ending is just the place where you stop your story

Yes and no. The ending is where things resolve. You might have multiple options, but one will be better than the others, depending on the experience you want your readers to have.

41. The only way you can write the truth is to assume that what you set down will never be read

No, I don’t think so.

I mean, if it helps you to pretend like you’re never going to show someone your writing, then you might feel freer to be honest in your writing.

But writing is meant to be read, and true things are meant to be heard.

42. Write your first draft by hand

Dictating what kind of writing utensils people should use, and when, is the road to ableism paved with good intentions. I consider a computer keyboard a writing utensil.

Use the tool that works for you. If it isn’t working, change it up. Sometimes switching between pen and pencil, or between pencil and keyboard, can shake yourself out of a writing block.

43. Challenge yourself

If you want to improve? Yes.

44. Everyone has a book in them

I think everyone has a story worth telling. I don’t think that literally everyone will write a book. But everyone has a story and a way to tell it.

45. Dialogue should be rhythmic and 46. Dialogue should be natural

I’m gonna answer these two together because, once again, we’re using absolutes where there are two perfectly valid options with different purposes.

What kind of effect are you trying to create? Are you going for realism or poetry? Do what fits the work! Do what fits the scene!

There are rules to writing, yes, but they are rarely cut and dry. That’s the note I want to end on here – different writing advice is valuable for different moments of writing. It’s okay to pick and choose which rules you listen to, and to change your mind later.

And sometimes two pieces of advice that sound like they conflict – like this distinction between rhythmic and natural dialogue – are actually not that different. Rhythmic dialogue and natural dialogue can be one and the same.

If you take a class on Shakespeare plays, the most common rhythm you’ll talk about is iambic pentameter. “Pentameter” just means that there are five beats in a line. “Iambic” is what kinds of beats we’re talking about. An iambic beat has a soft syllable and a hard syllable – it’s all in where we put emphasis in our words.

My name – Sophie – is not an iambic word, because you put the hard syllable first: SO-phie. But the sentence “My name is Sophie Katz” is iambic – “my NAME is SO-phie KATZ.”

For the sake of the screen readers, I won’t keep typing like that. Here are a couple more examples of iambic sentences:

In Romeo and Juliet: “But soft, what light through yonder window breaks?”

In an acting warmup I learned once: “Around the rock the ragged rascal ran.”

These sentences are rhythmic. But they are also natural, and that’s why we like to hear them. Now, where do you find a rhythm like this in nature?

Put your hand on your chest and wait a bit.

What could be more natural than your own heartbeat?

#writing advice #writing #advice #shakespeare #iambic #endings #truth #first drafts #thursday thoughts #listicles #conjunctions #said #word choice #empathy #dialogue #structure

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bromotachii · 4 years

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Biri Gyaru - Flying Colors「ビリギャル」Review

Biri Gyaru - Flying Colors「ビリギャル」(2015)

Youth/Comedy/Drama

1movie - 117 mins

– – – – –

*not spoiler free lol*

Summary (strictly from memory a week and a couple days later):

Inspiring. I felt like I needed to study after watching this movie. She was a delinquent, then she totally wasn’t, and it became strictly a studying montage. But actually as a delinquent she wasn’t that bad either :”). Just blonde. And had cigarettes but those were allegedly for a friend or something, so she’s a good kid on the inside who just wants to have fun all the time!! Also she had family issues ;( Her gyaru friends totally dump her to encourage her on her studying journey but actually it was for her own good and they come to celebrate with her later so they’re actually pretty good friends even though the rejection was harsh. Basically a poor student is trying to get into KEIO!!!! Will she make it???? Watch to find out :) Also watch for her tutor. And her fellow ex-delinquent turned studier sorta potential boyfriend who didn’t turn out to be anything ;( Yee-aahh! Good movie good movie.

MVP: mr. tutor sorry we forget your name ;(

RATINGS:

Overall: 7.32/10 - We enjoyed it!! very funny and for the family...maybe.

Pacing: 7.89/10 - Not rushed nor particularly dragged out. She decent.

Characters: 8.22/10 - They were fun and relatable and didn’t feel like they were moving just for the plot! Except for that one teacher who was super against her for no reason, just ~conflict~

Sayaka’s motivation to study: 12/10 - I felt it. I wish i had that motivation lol

Realism of studying: 4.31/10 - Come onnnn as if someone could stay that motivated for that long, especially someone who is used to having fun all the time! I’m used to studying all the time and I could not study like her.

Sayaka’s Transformation™: 7/10 - She straight up went for it man. A lil unrealistic but if only it was like that

The dad: 5.22/10 - he was kinda definitely not a good father but ig it could definitely be a real situation… so points for realism but minus points for how terrible he treated his wife and children. Also he kinda turned around near the end and it feels like Sayaka forgives him so here’s to hoping the heal in the future of that movie universe

The mom: 8.99/10 - amazing, so supportive, a little weak but she knows what she wants for her children and she works for it

The little sister: 10/10 - she was totally a supporting character she deserves more. She was also so obedient and supportive of sakaya…

Baseball brother: 5/10 - it was felt but I can’t believe they actually burned ALL his stuff that he basically spent his whole life using man… all that time and $$... but I can see why. He was kinda mean to his sisters too ;(

Mean teacher: 6.78/10 - He was mean and unsupportive but the actor is a bro and totally kudos to him for actually standing kinda naked at the graduation lol (follow up on your words!!! Even though he never explicitly promised to!!)

Mr. Tutor: 11/10 - he pulled thru and was supportive and fun AND realistic. Just what u need for a tutor. Sorry we couldn’t remember your name. But we stan. His lil high five thing was too cute.

Obligatory rain scenes: 7/10 - pretty good, didn’t feel so forced, matched the mood

Fellow ex-delinquent’s test result: 3/10 - Can’t believe they just brushed over his *spoiler alert* rejection from college?!? he worked hard too. keep working dude u got this

Sakaya’s *reveals* of scores: 4/10 there were so many times we thought she was checking her results but literally every time it wasn’t it. Sad and clickbaity

Final shot after credits: 10/10 - it was very cute. We got to see the mean teacher actor was only acting and is a dancing bro at heart

Lack of song we were expecting: 0/10 - Tbh we watched this movie for this song (linked) ((which is a bop… sue owns our <3)), but turns out it was only for the Chinese version trailer or something. On us tho. This rating was not included in the overall rating. :’)

Plot and movie scenes coming full circle: 7/10 - (when mr. tutor opens the window) pretty good, suited different the moods

Getting into Keio: 8.41/10 - #realistic good on her for getting into the school!! And it’s not like she suddenly became genius and could pass with uh,,,, flying colors but she worked up to her capabilities in that amount of time so good on her

Sensitivity to coffee?: 6/10 - did not really get this part but ig she doesn’t drink coffee usually? Never change ur morning routine on test day folks! it was funny though but also stressful yikes

– – – – –

Give it watch! She’ll motivate you to pass your tests with flying colors! :flying colors emoji:

See you next time on bromomovie reviews ;)

#movie review #fun watch #bromoreview #just for fun #a lil ironic #biri gyaru #flying colors #two people consulted

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stevenuniversallyreviews · 5 years

Text

Episode 123: Room for Ruby

“It's sunny now, but it can always rain later.”

Catch and Release really did change everything. I’ve already discussed it as a paradigm shift, transforming the concept of what the Crystal Gems are: before, a quartet with Steven as the rookie, and after, a fluid group where Steven has some seniority. We’re in an era where Connie, a full-fledged human, is a Crystal Gem. Bismuth, who already was a Crystal Gem but got reintroduced and then left behind, will return as a member of the modern iteration. And two former enemies, Peridot and Lapis, have joined the group (the latter unofficially). So who’s to say a ruby soldier wouldn’t fit in?

Granted, Charlyne Yi’s performs a ruby that’s a little too forgiving, and power combo Raven Molisee (of the highly expressive Molisee’n’Villeco) and Jesse Zuke (of the barnmaster duo Zuke’n’Florido) exaggerate her face and words to the point where it’s at least a little suspicious from the start. But Navy, cleverly named for the gem on her navel just as Army is named for her arm gem, has always been friendly and chipper compared to the other rubies in her squad. It’s believable, despite us never witnessing it, that the other rubies are mean to her for this attitude. And because this is a ridiculous character, it was always possible that her ridiculously jolly attitude was sincere.

That Navy is lying the whole time is irrelevant to the wonder of a show that makes us believe that she might join up. Her betrayal might be predictable, but our status quo is as capable of change as the planet our heroes love; it’s a similar sensation to Alone at Sea, where even though nothing drastic happens there’s a real possibility that Lapis might relapse and go back to Malachite. It’s so much better than an episode where we know from the start that the character-of-the-week will depart by the end of the story.

Navy’s chipper behavior is variably cute and questionable, but I love the massive hint that is the rain sequence. Gems become Crystal Gems when exposed to water, so Navy gets her own little baptism as part of the orientation. But because she’s a false convert, we get artificial rain for her artificial reaction. Yi sells absurd joy as well as absurd frustration, but there’s a cloud hanging over this moment that becomes clearer on rewatch.

Despite beginning with Steven and Garnet, then bringing Navy along for the ride, Room for Ruby becomes a Lapis Lazuli episode as soon as we head back to the barn. Navy is as one-dimensional as it gets before the reveal, blithely accepting everything that comes her way and seeming incapable of feeling negative emotions, so she needs an external opponent if we want this episode to have a plot. Yes, it’d be fun to see this goofball being a goofball for eleven minutes, but thankfully Steven Universe is willing to go deeper.

Peridot’s bossiness and desire to impress makes her an excellent candidate to teach Navy the ropes, and both can bond with fellow shorty Steven over a shared go-get’em mindset. So it makes sense that our wet blanket is Lapis, who first distrusts Navy and then gets fed up with how easy everything is for her. She’s trying, but seeing another foe-turned-friend have such a smooth go of it isn’t easy, and exploring those emotions of jealousy and inadequacy allows for a wonderful last hurrah before Lapis abandons Earth in Raising the Barn.

Lapis has a tricky role to play here, as she’s straddling the line between protagonist and antagonist depending on how much you trust Navy. Our hero/villain is portrayed sympathetically, as we’re reminded of her traumas and her slow but steady recovery process; she might come across as petty, but it’s understandable pettiness when Navy breezes by in areas where Lapis has struggled. And it helps that unlike fellow Ornery Lapis episode Barn Mates, Navy doesn’t seem to get upset at the negativity; this isn’t Peridot trying to win over a stubborn holdout, it’s a spacy ruby who ignores the venom. But at the same time, Lapis is the only protester in the Navy Parade, and her clash with Steven’s goal of bringing in a new friend makes her a huge bummer.

Which is why I love this episode’s lesson so much: that it’s sometimes okay to be a huge bummer.

It’s okay because everyone’s going through the world at their own pace, and whether you’re clinically depressed, a survivor of trauma, or you’re just plain sad, it doesn’t make you less worthy than folks in a happier mood. Lapis attempts patience and understanding despite her annoyance, and only snaps when Navy’s attitude turns sickly sweet; feelings of inferiority are hard to work through, but it doesn’t make it okay to be a jerk the whole time. Even after the outburst, Lapis is quick to reassure Navy, acknowledging that it’s an internal problem and apologizing. She wants to like the newcomer, but as soon as she senses the forced perkiness it’s hard for her not to notice that something’s off.

A good twist is something that makes you rethink the plot, but a great twist does this duty while being enjoyable as a plot point on its own merits. The execution of Navy’s betrayal is marvelous, even as it becomes more and more obvious that it’s coming. After spending the whole episode geeking out about Earth stuff, Navy not-so-subtly suggests that she wants to go back to her ship. Steven not only falls for it, but is down to press a huge button without asking follow-up questions; it may seem inconsistent with his growing maturity, but it makes sense that an excitable kid is lost in the joy of making a new friend. The stranger area for me is his exclamation that the Crystal Gems “finally” have a pilot, as if Pearl hasn’t been successfully navigating spaceships this whole time, but again, he’s caught up in the moment.

The twist-within-a-twist is that while Navy has been plotting against our heroes this whole time, her demeanor isn’t part of the act. Yi's transition from earnest giddiness on land versus manic giddiness post-betrayal is worth the price of admission, especially as she merrily explains that she opted not to just steal the ship because she wanted to watch the Crystal Gems suffer.

And of course, this brings about Lapis’s triumphant laughter at being proven right. Jennifer Paz is awesome throughout the episode, restraining herself when necessary for big bursts of energy to hit home, and it culminates in the sheer joy that comes from righteous vindication. We could’ve gotten a somber moment of Steven’s anguish at being tricked, similar to what we got after Peridot’s duplicity in Message Received, but Lapis allows us a sense of relief despite things going horribly.

In an episode featuring a character as unsubtle as Navy (being tricky doesn’t stop her from being loud and hammy), I love the quieter story we get from Garnet. We only get a nudge that Navy’s story appeals to Ruby and Sapphire, but we don’t need more than that, so I’m glad we don’t get more. Yes, it would be fun to see Ruby hanging out with Navy, but the episode’s focus is elsewhere and we don’t indulge in fanservice that would take away from the plot. The two balloons Garnet brings at the end are color-coded for convenience, so we don’t need anyone to tell us that the optimistic red message is Ruby’s hopes and the apologetic blue message is Sapphire’s realism. It’s not a novel observation that Steven Universe respects the audience enough to not hold our hands, but it’s still appreciated.

(Also appreciated is a soft moment of Garnet bonding with Steven independent of the plot as they make wishes; Steven may be growing up fast, but he’s still allowed to be a kid sometimes instead of spending every episode in teen angst mode.)

In terms of criticisms, I’m a little torn about the pacing: Room for Ruby meanders a bit in that second act, even though I understand its purpose. Lapis needs to have her tolerance for Navy strained to a breaking point so she’s not throwing a tantrum out of nowhere, so we need multiple examples of frustrating glee. But it does get a little boring on rewatch to have the point driven home again and again that Navy is a perfect little angel, even if it’s all building up to the twist that she’s anything but.

Still, I can’t help but enjoy the nostalgia this structure provides, because major plot points aside, the episode fits right in with classic Season 1. We get a simple story that primes us for an obvious conclusion. Steven will find an unusual solution in his cheeseburger backpack. Steven will learn patience when Pearl takes a while to reform. Steven’s beach party with the Gems and the Pizzas will teach the Gems to respect civilians more. Lapis will grow to accept Navy’s differences. But instead, Steven’s improvisation only goes so far, and he’s impatient again as soon as Pearl returns, and the Gems still don’t care about Fish Stew Pizza, and Lapis’s negative outlook was correct. Steven Universe first made its mark by toying with the conventions of episodes with straightforward morals, and it’s nice to see that legacy continue so late in the series.

The implications of Navy’s actions are soon made clear, as the loss of the Crystal Gems’ only means of space travel (stolen from the very barn where Steven, Greg, and Pearl first experimented with space travel!) makes Steven’s imminent sacrifice that much weightier. But before that shoe drops, we can enjoy one last glimpse of our favorite little ruby.

(I’m kidding of course, our Ruby is the best ruby.)

We’re the one, we’re the ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR!

Charlyne Yi hamming it up and Lapis’s grouchiness paying off? What’s not to love?

Top Twenty

Steven and the Stevens

Hit the Diamond

Mirror Gem

Lion 3: Straight to Video

Alone Together

Last One Out of Beach City

The Return

Jailbreak

The Answer

Mindful Education

Sworn to the Sword

Rose’s Scabbard

Earthlings

Mr. Greg

Coach Steven

Giant Woman

Beach City Drift

Winter Forecast

Bismuth

Steven’s Dream

Love ‘em

Laser Light Cannon

Bubble Buddies

Tiger Millionaire

Lion 2: The Movie

Rose’s Room

An Indirect Kiss

Ocean Gem

Space Race

Garnet’s Universe

Warp Tour

The Test

Future Vision

On the Run

Maximum Capacity

Marble Madness

Political Power

Full Disclosure

Joy Ride

Keeping It Together

We Need to Talk

Chille Tid

Cry for Help

Keystone Motel

Catch and Release

When It Rains

Back to the Barn

Steven’s Birthday

It Could’ve Been Great

Message Received

Log Date 7 15 2

Same Old World

The New Lars

Monster Reunion

Alone at Sea

Crack the Whip

Beta

Back to the Moon

Kindergarten Kid

Buddy’s Book

Gem Harvest

Three Gems and a Baby

That Will Be All

The New Crystal Gems

Storm in the Room

Room for Ruby

Like ‘em

Gem Glow

Frybo

Arcade Mania

So Many Birthdays

Lars and the Cool Kids

Onion Trade

Steven the Sword Fighter

Beach Party

Monster Buddies

Keep Beach City Weird

Watermelon Steven

The Message

Open Book

Story for Steven

Shirt Club

Love Letters

Reformed

Rising Tides, Crashing Tides

Onion Friend

Historical Friction

Friend Ship

Nightmare Hospital

Too Far

Barn Mates

Steven Floats

Drop Beat Dad

Too Short to Ride

Restaurant Wars

Kiki’s Pizza Delivery Service

Greg the Babysitter

Gem Hunt

Steven vs. Amethyst

Bubbled

Adventures in Light Distortion

Gem Heist

The Zoo

Rocknaldo

Enh

Cheeseburger Backpack

Together Breakfast

Cat Fingers

Serious Steven

Steven’s Lion

Joking Victim

Secret Team

Say Uncle

Super Watermelon Island

Gem Drill

Know Your Fusion

Future Boy Zoltron

Tiger Philanthropist

No Thanks!

6. Horror Club 5. Fusion Cuisine 4. House Guest 3. Onion Gang 2. Sadie’s Song 1. Island Adventure

#room for ruby #steven universe #su #steven universally #review

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comicteaparty · 4 years

Text

February 10th-February 16th, 2020 CTP Archive

The archive for the Comic Tea Party week long chat that occurred from February 10th, 2020 to February 16th, 2020. The chat focused on Betrayal by Alex Lewis.

Featured Comment:

Chat:

Comic Tea Party

BOOK CLUB START!

Hello and welcome everyone to Comic Tea Party’s Book Club~! This week we’ll be focusing on Betrayal by Alex Lewis~! (https://alexmakescomics.com/betrayal/)

You are free to read and comment about the comic all week at your own pace until February 16th, so stop on by whenever it suits your schedule! Discussions are freeform, but we do offer discussion prompts in the pins for those who’d like to have them. Additionally, remember that while constructive criticism is allowed, our focus is to have fun and appreciate the comic! Whether you finish the comic or can only read a few pages, everyone is welcome to join and chat with us!

DISCUSSION PROMPTS – PART 1

1. What did you like about the beginning of the comic?

2. What has been your favorite moment in the comic (so far)?

3. Who is your favorite character?

4. Which characters do like seeing interact the most?

5. What is something you like about the art? If you have a favorite illustration, please share it!

6. What is a theme you like that the comic explores?

7. What do you like about the comic’s story or overall related content? 8. Overall, what do you think the comic’s strengths are?

Don’t feel inspired by the prompts? Feel free to discuss anything else that interested you!

Delphina

Just finished reading! I really found the part with Aune's "book of secrets" such a heartbreaking sequence. Alex using the blue pen kind of reinforces the themes of differentness and being an outsider not only in her outside world, but even just in the context of being honest about her own feelings. https://alexmakescomics.com/2019/06/07/chapter-six/

I also really felt for her in Chapter 8, when talking about her relationship with Aune and saying "the more time I spent with her, the more of myself I lost trying to keep up with her. It didn't matter to me at all. I liked myself better when I was with her." Just again, this theme of finding something to define herself when she'd been adrift, but not always in an honest or healthy way. https://alexmakescomics.com/2019/08/11/chapter-eight/

Eilidh (Lady Changeling)

I like the art style - it's very unique!

snuffysam (Super Galaxy Knights)

I like the way the comic ends on sort of an open-ended note. It's not very often that we get completed comics here on CTP, and I think this comic's ending is weirdly satisfying in its incompleteness. Like we don't know whether Aune and Alex make up, but we know that they're both open to it, y'know? I also looked into the Harold Pinter play Betrayal (which this comic is partially based off), and it's pretty interesting the ways they're similar and different. Like the story regards a group of friends and their romantic relationships (and them betraying each other, of course), but the main group of characters is two girls and one boy rather than two men and one woman. I'm curious how many of the changes are due to it being partially a memoir of the author's life and how many are the result of just creating an interesting fictional story about high schoolers.

I also really like the comic's use of flashbacks to tell Alex's story - flashing back to her childhood contextualizes her experiences as a highschooler really well.

RebelVampire

I really like in general how the story is told with a non-linear timeline. Not a lot of stories can actually pull them off successfully, because you run a high risk of confusing the audience. However, despite this one time jumping around a lot, it was never confusing. I think I chalk this up to the fact that the focus on the comic is not the plot itself but the relationships. So you don't need to know the timeline exactly to be able to empathize, experience, and understand what is going on in the relationships. So this is something I really enjoy about the comic. I really love non-linear when it's done well, and this is done well in that regard.

What I enjoy about the beginning of the comic is just how damn awkward everything is. Like, everything about their interactions is exactly why ill never go to a high school reunion. Cause there's this expectation to be super impressed with ppl (hence shallow comments) while also being a mind reader (like knowing someone doesnt go by an old name anymore). It's embarrassing and horrible and the comic really hit at some of my deeper social anxieties that while I've grown from, never will quite be gone. So bravo for making benign horror XD(edited)

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

Woah, I was not expecting to read a completed comic here! That was a nice change of pace. I really agree with the people praising the non-linear timeline. Using a highschool reunion as a framing device was an excellent decision

I wonder if the main character was gay or asexual?

Alex_makes_comics

Hello, I'm Alex. I made this comic - and I'm crying reading your comments. I've never had people review this book before. Some of the chapters only had about two views before this week so... This is very big for me. Hooboy. In answer to ongoing questions: changes to the Betrayal script from Harold Pinter's play were made to make it fit my experiences. The play is always a question of who is betraying who in a toxic love triangle. It's a jumping off point for me to talk about my memories. I went to see it and it hit a chord, after which I immediately sat down and wrote this. I love how the title of the play conceals who is betraying who: betrayal is a flexible concept. Hiding behind Pinter's words meanwhile ,when I have to, makes it easier to share my memories with others without self censoring. I am always terrified of people I know reading this book! In answer to the question of orientation, I'm bisexual if that helps anyone

RebelVampire

My favorite moment in the comic I would say is the ending. I like that it's open-ended and that there's no clear leaning one way or another. It's kind of up to the reader to judge the events they just saw. Not to mention, I feel the open-ending nature fits the mood of the comic in that relationships aren't straight forward and constantly in a flux. So having the ending be not entirely clear suits that well. As for a favorite character, I'm honestly not sure I could pick one in this case. Everyone is so human and I feel like picking a favorite would kind of be like picking a side. Or kind of like your friends trying to ask you to rank them in terms of how much you like them. That would be a challenge I'm not up for in this case. As for interactions, definitely Alex and Aune. The relationship there is fascinating from the way the story is told, so I'm never quite sure what to make of it, especially when knowing how the relationship sours. And since its through their interactions we get to know Aune, it almost feels like a character study in a way whenever the two interact.

Before I blather too much in one day, one thing I like about the comic is how different the kid versions of the characters look as opposed to the adults. I feel it's more true to life since a lot of adults do change a ton from how they looked at kids. So while theres definitely similarities, the age progression just felt really natural.

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

I agree with what Rebel said about the age progression feeling natural. If I could describe this comic in one word, I would maybe choose "realistic."

It does a great job of protraying that feeling of growing up and leaving things behind

Emotions and drama that feel so important as a child and as a high schooler turn out to really not matter that much at all

Comic Tea Party

DISCUSSION PROMPTS – PART 2

9. Given the story’s title, in what ways do we see betrayal throughout the story, and which moment stuck out to you the most regarding the subject? What can be learned from the story in regards to dealing with it?

10. What do you think the story can teach us regarding the nature of relationships and how they change as we grow older? In what ways do these events perhaps relate to your own life or what about the storytelling makes them relatable in general?

11. What do you think the story has to say about growing up in general, both in regards to how we change and how the people around us change? If applicable, why do you think coming of age stories like this are important?

12. How do you interpret the end of chapter 10 where Alex and Aune finally interact? What do you think each character is feeling? Overall, do you think their relationship can be repaired after the damage is done?

Don’t feel inspired by the prompts? Feel free to discuss anything else that interested you!

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

12) i didbt read the ending as starting to repair a relationship. I saw it as leaving your past behind. Also she doesn't seem to understand the damage she did to their relationship, so i don't think the main character would want to reconnect

Kabocha

Oh, dang. So I just binged the entirety of this comic, and there's something about this that feels a little... close to home, I guess? I really empathize with Alex -- the feeling of having someone who you love just kind of up and ditch you like that... That hurts. Granted, her situation was a bit more complicated, but... hhh. I think at best, she might go the route of wanting to be friendly with Aune later, but it just isn't gonna work out. That pain still exists, and even if Aune is past it, Alex pretty clearly isn't. And I think it's understandable. It's not a grudge, but more like that kind of awkward avoidance because you don't wanna get hurt again. just... aaaaaaaaaa. This was a very good read. Thank you @Alex_makes_comics.

RebelVampire

I do think what @Eightfish (Puppeteer) touched onto is the comic's strength: realism. Every event in this comic is so relateable since I think everyone can say they've at least been in a similar situation at least one of those times. So it forms a real connection with the reader so easily, thus allowing it to pull on the heart strings. Let's talk about themes and stuff though! So for in regards to betrayal, the moment that stuck out to me the most was the classroom convo between Alex and Aune where Aune is kind of distant and doesn't seem to really like anyone anymore and wants Alex to do break up dirty work. The reason this stuck with me is you can so clearly see it as a betrayal, and yet at the same time, it's such a benign thing. Like nobody is being literally stabbed in the back, nobody is having money stolen, no one is stealing anybody's lover. It's just...distance and a friendship falling apart for various reasons. Which I think is really the sad part. Since rather than dealing with betrayal, I think this story shows the many different forms it can take. And that sometimes its not this overdramatic thing. Sometimes its a slow burn that just singes for hours and hours.

However, I do like the story's maturity in that it shows us relationships are hard and need active maintenance. Cause without that, they fall apart. Additionally, as we grow older, its sad but common place friendships wont last. People change all the times, especially interests. So in the end those changes will drive people apart. At the very least I certainly haven't talked to my high school friends in years since many of them moved, got married, had kids, etc. Even during high school I had friends drift away. And I think these are pretty universal experiences, which is what I think makes the storytelling as relateable as it is.

As for the end, I kind of interpret it as "not ready." From the expressions, I think both Alex and Aune clearly felt awkward. Like the elephant in the room. They both wanted to talk about it seriously, but also both didn't want to talk about it. Too many feelings still fresh, coupled with maybe not enough desire to fix everything yet. So while I do believe most relationships can be repaired given time and effort, both parties need to be ready. And I just don't see that happening yet from how things ended.

Comic Tea Party

DISCUSSION PROMPTS – PART 3

13. What are you most looking forward to seeing in regards to the comic?

14. Any final words of encouragement for the comic?

Don’t feel inspired by the prompts? Feel free to discuss anything else that interested you!

Kabocha

As I said before, I'm really glad I read this. It felt very personal, and it was kinda cathartic to read! It also was kind of nice to see someone else kinda express the awkwardness of meeting again with someone who you felt hurt by. And just... Yeah. Thank you for this comic.

Alex_makes_comics

Hi, Everybody. I'm not sure if this is the last day of Betrayal book club, or if tomorrow counts still, but I wanted to use this opportunity to thank everyone for reading and engaging with my work, before you start on the next webcomic. I have never been through a process like this. Most of the time, I make comics and release them into the internet, never to be seen again. It's a long and lonely process, full of self questioning and self doubt. You've all really restored my confidence. Just knowing that you read and genuinely got what I was trying to achieve is amazing. I was worried about the ending of chapter 11, that it might put readers off, but seeing you all bouncing ideas off each other about "will they"/ "won't they" get back together reassures me that I did the right thing. This was my first completed graphic novel,and I have learned a bit since making it. I am currently working on draft 2, which involves a full redraw. I have about half of the book done. The redraw is going to be 30% more cartoony in style, to give the book a clearer aesthetic. I am aiming for stronger lines and colour themes. I'm also adding new pages throughout. Part of this is to have Aune more visible in the background of scenes between Alex and Jonas, because they're all in one school: you can't avoid people completely in these situations. I'm also making some of the school scenes noisier to play on the "benign horror" elements - thank you for this term, Rebel Vampire! My goal is to redraw everything, update the website, then print a small batch to sell at cons. If anything bugged you about the current draft that you think I have to know, you are more than welcome to tell me. Otherwise, in case you want to know when the new version is out, I have a mailing list here: https://mailchi.mp/e64c62c2d202/alexmakescomics Thank you again for everything. You really don't know how much you've helped me these two weeks. It's been mind blowing.

RebelVampire

What I'm most looking forward to seeing in regards to the comic is just more people finding it. It's a really touching, raw, and personally gripping story. Not only is the storytelling well-done with its use of time, but just overall, its one of the few stories where I can actually say it really got me thinking about life, relationships, and other things. And not a lot of comics can do that.

Comic Tea Party

BOOK CLUB END!

Thank you everyone so much for reading and chatting about Betrayal this week! Please also give a special thank you to Alex Lewis for volunteering the comic and creating it! If you liked Betrayal, make sure to continue to support it via some of the links below!

Read and Comment: https://alexmakescomics.com/betrayal/

Alex’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/alexmakescomics

#ctparchive #comics #webcomics #indie comics #comic chat #comic discussion #book club #bookclub #webcomic book club #webcomic bookclub #comic tea party #ctp #betrayal #Alex Lewis

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