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vanaglorio · 3 years

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VANAGLORIA : A STUDY IN HUBRIS.

HECTOR SOLORZANO. full name, HECTOR ALEJANDRO VELASQUEZ SOLORZANO. 27 years old, born on december 28th, 2994 in mexico city. cis man and uses he / they / doesn’t really care about pronouns. sold his soul to his family’s global construction and real estate empire and works as a civil engineering project manager.

SKELETON. DYNAMICS. PINTEREST. HISTORY & MISC. BELOW.

trigger warning: suicide, drug overdose

IMPETUS.

the concept of making some kind of lasting, indelible mark on the world that wasn’t gilded, silver-spooned and handed to him on a platter. the glory of having his own name mean something, beyond inheritance and privilege and absurd extravagance. creating something with his mind and his own two hands — in and of itself, an impossible feat considering all he’s ever achieved has had his family’s insignia stamped on it. but an ambition he holds fast to like a cardinal point on a compass

plain old kendall roy style retribution and succession drama baby. hector’s never forgiven his father for destroying his brother and despite his father’s best attempts to shape him into the back-up heir, he’s going to fuck this company up before he ever gets to inherit it.

hubris is his ultimate achilles heel and downfall. yes, irony thy name is hector. thinks he’s somehow smarter, faster, hungrier and more brilliant and than everyone around him. which is obviously not the case. this guy is playing so many games within games with enemies and allies alike, he couldn’t claw his way out of the matrix-style shit storm if he tried.

HISTORY.

only child, the demon, angle and beloved favourite all in one. originally born as the younger son. the spare, not the heir.

hector’s father is the CEO of the largest civil and engineering construction company in the world. their headquarters is in mexico city but they have subsidiary offices in madrid, london, tokyo and los angeles. hector’s mother is the heiress of the velasquez real estate empire, her family holding company owning substantial parcels of land all across south america, north america and europe.

his older brother, teodoro, was born 7 years before him. the consummate perfect son and heir to the empire — until, of course, he wasn’t. escalating parental pressure, crushing academic expectations, the weight of the world upon his shoulders. teodoro was no atlas. hector was 14 when they found his brother overdosed in a penthouse in saint-tropez while on summer vacation.

the process of priming hector to become the next heir was so swift, so damning, as to be almost surgical. teo’s body was barely cold and laid to rest in the ground before their parents began to talk about hector’s ‘future’.

hector never forgave his parents for what happened to teo. they were to blame, of course they were — they stood by and watched as teo slowly killed himself, until there was nothing left but his body to go. he was dead long before he swallowed his own heart and jumped on a one-way first class flight to the french riviera.

generally speaking, hector’s academic record was rather unexceptional until teo died and he had no choice but to perform in teo’s stead. and he did it, teeth gritted and eyes slitted murderous, the whole damn show pony circus show. the endless parade of meaningless extracurriculars: everything from debate club to swim team and lacrosse to mathematics decathlons. enough to fill a trophy room with lustrous medals, accolades, first place ribbons, and still not enough. hector could never live up to teo’s looming shadow, nor did he want to. it felt, somehow, like a betrayal, to prove he was better than his brother in any way. to validate his parent’s desire to mould him as the emergency replacement.

the only subjects hector enjoyed with any genuine passion or fascination that wasn’t feigned were classics and history.

enrolled into verdamme as a staunch fuck you to his parents who had astronomical hopes he’d attend MIT or stanford or ETH and get an engineering degree. (he did end up getting one, postgrad.)

was julian’s so-called right-hand man throughout all the years at verdamme and is also one of the riot club member’s who knew julian the longest. loved julian as much as he hated him and thought he deserved to die. one of the leading proponents of the #kill caesar movement. somehow not the most suspicious potential suspect.

the irritating bastard in class who barely tried but seemed to ace every single test. in reality he just has an exceptional short-term memory and mind for rote learning — in one ear, out the other, etc. very much the kid that seems to be napping for all of class and then pipes up to give the most bizarre, unexpectedly insightful comment in the middle of discussion.

fucks with people, their lives / hearts / hopes and dreams, as a way to feel something? inside? maybe?? notorious for being one of julian’s worst enablers but was also plenty responsible for his own schemes, manipulations and cruelties.

MISCELLANEOUS.

is currently engaged to the heiress of a spanish shipping company in the world’s longest running engagement. almost never wears his ring but mexican and spanish news outlets made quite a big deal out of it when it was first announced over a year ago.

speaks spanish, english, french and italian fluently. due to being your typical classics nerd, also fluent in latin and ancient greek. conversational in german and portugese.

general vibe is aloof, albeit quite disarming once he strikes up a conversation, laidback, chariasmtic, “chill”, able to talk to anyone about anything when he can actually be bothered to. also the guy with zero chill, secretly. we don’t talk about that.

endeavours to avoid personal drama at all costs that hasn’t been purposefully orchestrated for some kind of game but will enjoy the schadenfreude from the sidelines while placing bets on who’ll come out on top. it’s probably a gambling problem.

some kind of deep emotional trauma (re: parental neglect & then overnight obsession with him being the perfect replacement son for the dead brother) (re: aforementioned dead brother who is possibly the only person he’s ever loved) that prevents him from properly connecting to people on a deeper level beyond shallow, casual and purposeless sex

travelling is the one and only perk of his current job. he loves travelling, but in the niche struggling backpacker way that normal twenty-something years olds do, not the private jet lifestyle of a billionaire heir of a global conglomerate

collects obscure roman artefacts, specifically from the late roman republic, and has an antique knife collection. his favourite is a ceremonial gold dagger and sheath from the tomb of tutankhamun.

teo’s girlfriend left his dog, socrates, with him after the funeral, claiming she couldn’t bear to have the memory of him around her. he’s unironically hector’s best friend.

#𝐈. 𝐈 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓 𝐀𝐍 𝐄𝐌𝐏𝐈𝐑𝐄 𝐈𝐍 𝐌𝐘 𝐓𝐄𝐄𝐓𝐇 / VANAGLORIA.

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ralexsol · 4 years

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Sanders Sides Possession AU

Yeah, so I would write an actual story about this but I’m busy writing my Lies series rn. If you want to write this or make a comic off it, just ask me first because I wanna know about it and read it. :P Also, please credit me if you make a story off this. I was inspired to make this AU after watching Thomas’s “wipe it” little video

-Thomas lives in an alternate universe where magic is a thing and he lives in Britain instead of Florida for some reason

-His dad, Patton, dies one day and so they have a funeral for him

-At the funeral, Thomas accidentally conducts a magic spell that takes seven souls of the dead from their graves and puts them into his body

-Thomas doesn’t realize this until he’s cleaning his mirror later that day, and basically Thomas’s short video happens but instead he doesn’t change clothes and Virgil is like “who cleans their mirror?”

-Obviously Thomas freaks out because he just lost control of his body for a good ten seconds and multiple other souls were in control instead

-After a long and arduous conversation between himself and six of the souls (the seventh refusing to show face- Orange) by wiping at the mirror, Thomas discovers who each of the souls are

-Virgil: a 22-year-old artist who had been hit by a car two months before

-Logan: Thomas’s 10th grade high school teacher who’d been shot at a school shooting a year prior

-Janus: a mob gang leader from the 1920s

-Roman: a long-dead knight

-Remus: a long-dead duke who happens to be Roman’s brother

-And Patton, Thomas’s father

-So, Thomas is really happy because his father is actually alive again! But Roman, being from a time where a lot more people used magic, informs them of what spell Thomas had conducted. Yes, they all share Thomas’s body and are “alive” for the time being, but if they don’t get put back in their graves before a year passes their souls will all be sent to Hell- including Thomas’s

-Of course, being the kind person that he is, Thomas wants to let them all stay in his body for a while and let them live again. This is where the story can go anywhere pretty much, as it’s just them having fun being alive again

-They change clothes every time they switch control of Thomas’s body

-This is because Thomas tells everyone about what happened, so by changing their outfits other people can differentiate between them all

-After a little bit of training, all the sides (including Thomas) can hear each others’ voices in their shared headspace

-Eventually they start looking for ways to undo the spell, but y’know- eventually Orange (once he’s revealed in canon series and we know what he’s like) tries to get in the way of their plans because oh no!! He knows a way to stay in Thomas’s body forever and he plans to take it for himself!!

-When they find the counterspell Thomas let’s each side go wherever or do whatever one thing they want to do most, and each side leaves individually

-Logan wants to go stargazing at Arches National Park and goes back to his grave first. He also makes a star chart for Thomas

-Roman and Remus leave together. Roman, who’s been dating a handsome fellow this entire time, goes to Paris with him and they kiss on the Eiffel Tower- he gives Thomas a fanfic about him and Leslie Odom Jr.. Remus was ready to go for a while but was waiting for Roman to be ready, as all he’d wanted to do was dance to invigorating music with other people and he did that in a park with a large crowd. Remus gives Thomas the music album that has the song he danced to on it

-Virgil goes to a MCR concert one last time and gifts Thomas his precious jacket

-Janus performs in a play and records a message for Thomas telling him that he deserves to take care of himself and that he is one of the greatest people Janus has ever known

-Idk about Orange, obviously they make peace with him and Thomas lets him go back to his grave instead of sending him to Hell

-Of course, lastly you have Patton. He and Thomas share a heartfelt goodbye and Patton tells Thomas that it’s okay to lose people, because there will always be somebody else there for him. Patton gives Thomas a dog pin and goes back to his grave

That’s all I’ve got, if you need a story name I came up with Octo Animarum, which is Latin for ‘eight souls’. Do with this what you will

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sir-skarsgard · 4 years

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Prompt List

My list of prompts that I’ve found on the internet or from movie quotes for one-shots; pick a character, pick one or more dialog prompts below and send in a request! Maximum prompts per request is three.

List of character I will do:

Axel Cluney (Deadpool 2)

Bob Gray (IT)

Henry Pearl (Battle creek)

Gordan Merkel

Mark (Assassination Nation)

Mickey (Villains 2019)

Roman Godfrey (Hemlock Grove)

The Kid (Castle Rock)

1: “Sometimes I get sad and I don’t know why. I’m sorry.”

2: “I hope you find the happiness you pretend to have.”

3: “I would love you in any shape, in any world, with any past. Never doubt that.”

4: “If your life had a face I’d punch it.”

5: “Do you have any fucking clue what you do to me?”

6: “Sometimes I wish I could turn back time. Not to change anything, just to feel some things twice.”

7: “I feel like I should stop thinking about you, but I can’t”

8: “It’s a classic. He/she loves someone else.”

9: I think you’re enough. You’re enough for you. You’re enough for me.”

10: “I have nothing.“ “You have me. Am I not enough?“

11: “ I shouldn’t be jealous, he/she isn’t/aren’t even mine to be jealous over.”

12: “Who am I to be in love when your love was never for me?”

13: “Except for being a bit fucked in the head, I’d say he/she’s normal.”

14: “I love you. I knew it the moment I met you. I’m sorry it took me so long to catch up.”

15: “Words... how little they mean when you’re a little too late.”

16: “It’s a party. So I’m pretending to have fun.”

17: “When was the last time you were hugged?”

18: “How can someone just not be there anymore?”

19: “That wasn’t very romantic. Kind of gross too.”

20: “I’m not a person you should fall in love with.“

21: “I don’t mind you breaking my heart.”

22: “Do you know how it feels when the person you love the most tells you that you shouldn’t love them?”

23: “Just admit it; you want to kiss me.” “Or maybe you want to kiss me and you think using reverse psychology is going to make me kiss you.”

24: “Did you really just push that guy/girl off the couch so you could cuddle with me?” ‘Yes.” ‘This is why I love you.”

25: “Is there at particular reason you’re in my room half-naked?”

26: “Oh, would you look at that. There’s nowhere to sit besides my lap.”

27: “Can I have some of that blanket? I’m freezing.”

28: “Why are you so jealous?”

29: “What’s the matter, love?” “Nothing, I’m just a little sad.” “Come here.”

30: “I know I’m supposed to be mad at you, but I miss you so much.“

31: “What did I ever do to you?”

32: “I’m just scared that you’ll leave me one day.”

33: “I wanna kiss you so bad right now.” “So then kiss me.”

34: “I can’t sleep. I had a nightmare again.”

35: “I can’t have a proper conversation if you’re shirtless.”

36: “Holding you in my arms is the best feeling in the entire world, and I don’t ever want to give that up.”

37: “You know I’d never leave you. I love you too much and I’m too selfish to walk away.”

38: “Did you... shit, that was smooth as fuck.”

39: “You’re better than my favorite fictional character, and that’s saying a lot.”

40: “You may not be my first girlfriend, but you‘re the only one that matters.“

41: “Out of all the things I like to eat, you’re my favorite.”

42: “I always joke around because it makes you smile and I love seeing you smile.”

43: “Why are you so quiet around me?” “Because I’m worried I’m gonna say something stupid and scare you away.”

44: “Stop looking at me like that!” “I’m sorry to have to be the one to inform you, but that’s what eyes do.”

45: “My mom would love you.”

46: “I’ll always be there.”

47: “You can miss someone and still be mad at them.”

48: “The more people you let into your life the more they can just walk right out.”

49: “Why are you like this?” “Unresolved daddy issues.”

50: “I was being sarcastic.“

51: “It’s no big deal.”

52: “You scared the shit out of me.”

53: “Thanks, but no thanks.”

54: “That’s easier said than done.”

55: “Wow, you look like shit. What can I do for you?”

56: “I don’t believe in love at first sight, but if you’re willing to walk by again I think I can make an exception.”

57: “I loved you.” “You did what?”

58: “Listen.” “What am I listening for?” “Nothing, I just wanted you to shut up.”

59: “We need the cavalry.” “I am the cavalry.” “Fuck you mean you’re the cavalry?” “I’m all that’s left.”

60: “Do you think you could ever love me again?“ “I never stopped loving you.“

61: “I need a favor.” “I already gave you a favor and you got my girlfriend shot.” “She’s alright.” “And? That doesn’t change anything.”

62: “You have this smile.” “What kind of smile?” “The type of smile that would be cruel not to kiss.”

63: “Sorry I’m not a heartless bitch like you.”

64: “I’m sorry I wasn’t the friend you deserved, but you were the friend I needed.” “You’re saying that like you’re never going to see me again.” “I’m not. I’m leaving.” “But you just came to make amends!” “No, I came to apologize.”

65: “If you think, for even a second, that I wouldn’t risk everything for her/him, then you’re wrong.”

66: “I love you.” “I love you, too.” “Do you?” “Hey, you know you’re mine.” “Yeah, but are you mine?”

67: “People are so quick to leave. It doesn’t matter if they're all you have.”

68: “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you while I was hurting.”

69: “It hurts so much, and you don’t understand how much it hurts. You don’t care because it’s not happening to you.”

70: “I can’t do this anymore. I can’t just sit here and wait for you to come back.” “I don’t want that either.” “Then stay!” “I can’t.” “Then leave. Leave and do not come back.”

71: “I love my boyfriend/girlfriend more than anything in the entire world and I would die for him/her, but I know that’d make him/her sad, so instead I’m gonna live for him/her.”

72: “What can I say? I’m irresistible.” “And yet, here I am, resisting you.”

73: “You don’t get into a relationship to mess around and cheat you get into a relationship to search for that one person you love more than yourself. And I know now that that’ll never be possible for you, because you’re incapable of loving anyone besides yourself.”

74: “Give it up and she lives.” “You’re an idiot if you think she can’t take care of herself.”

75: “Don’t tell me you're afraid.” “I was born afraid.”

76: “Go ahead. Do what I can’t do.”

77: “I don’t want to speak to you anymore.”

78: “This is everything!” “No, he/she is everything.” “You’re going to give all of this up for him/her?” “Yes.”

79: “”You wouldn’t understand. its a secret.” “I wouldn’t understand or it’s a secret?” “You wouldn’t understand (character), it’s a secret.”

80: “Thinking I had the heart to care for you was your first mistake, followed by countless others.“

81: “I can’t figure out what you are.” “Excuse me?” “Good influence or bad.”

82: “I’m scared of sex, but not because I think it’s going to hurt, but because I’m uncomfortable with my body and I’ve never been naked in front of anyone before.”

83: “Does he/she really think of her/him as just a friend?” “No, he/she’s in love with him/her, he/she just won’t admit it.”

84: “All I ever really wanted was for him/her to love me.”

85: “Nothing is going according to plan!” “That depends.” “On what?” “who’s plan you’re talking about.”

86: “You intrigue me.” “I’m not very interesting.” “Funny, uninteresting people don’t usually have to say that.”

87: “Why is he bleeding?” “Because he’s an idiot.” “I didn’t know idiocy cause people to start spontaneously bleeding from a gash in their (body part).”

88: “That is a terribly, horribly, incredibly stupid idea. Let’s do it and see what happens.”

89: “He/she’s an idiot, I’m an idiot. We’re co-presidents of the Club Idiot.” “Don’t you mean the Idiot Club?” “Exactly.”

90: “He/she’s crying. What do I do?“ “Go comfort him/her.” “How?“ “Start with hugs.“ “With what?“

91: “You know you’re in love with her, right?” “Since when?” “Since pretty much always. That’s why I’m breaking up with you.”

92: “Will you hit him over the head with a frying pan?” “I believe the technical term for that is ‘will you murder him’.” “Fine, then. Will you murder him for me?”

93: “I would like to join you in acknowledging the difficulties of your life.” “You’re the worst at this comforting thing.”

94: “You don’t strike me as a professional criminal.” “That’s what makes me so good at it.”

95: “Literally everything about that is illegal.”

96: “Why are you doing that?” “Doing what?” “Treating me like a person.” “Because you... are one...?”

97: “My mascara is too expensive to ruin by crying, but just know I am feeling a lot of things on the inside.”

98: “Did you bring us here to die?” “Obviously.” “I can’t tell if you’re being sarcastic or not.”

99: “Are you clinically insane or incredibly annoying?” “I don’t know. Probably both.”

100: “That’s not funny.“ “I thought it was.“ “You don‘t count. You stared laughing in the middle of a funeral because you started thinking of a meme you saw.”

#dialog prompts #preferences #one shots #bill skarsgard #castle rock #it 2017 #Deadpool 2 #diary of a wimpy kid #hemlock grove #villains 2019 #battle creek #atomic blonde

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things-we-used-tc-share · 5 years

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flower petals

Warnings: Alcohol mention

Ship: Royality, Analogical

Plot: Roman and Patton are getting married, and it gives both Virgil and Logan something to think about. Human!AU

((After writing that really dark fic, I thought we all deserved something much more lighthearted))

Virgil’s been staring at the faux flower petals in his hands for five minutes without blinking. Despite everything, he was somehow not freaking out, smiling down at the red and blue cotton shapes with a light feeling in his heart. His best friends were getting married today (And jokingly, Roman declared Virgil was now his son-in-law, Virgil had not minded, whilst Patton was a soft, loving father figure or ‘dad friend’ Roman allowed room for sarcasm and bitter wit). Dressed in a black suit, in which Roman had joked “Made him look like he was going to a funeral,” and Virgil had quipped “It’s the funeral of my ability to come across as dark and edgy while throwing flower petals, let me live,”

Logan shuffled next to him, tugging at his collar “I hadn’t expected to feel uncomfortable in a suit,” he admits, and Virgil looks at him with humor because really, this is what Logan wears every day except with a blazer thrown on top. The suit is dark blue, the lapels black, matching the deep blue shirt and black shoes. Despite this obvious discomfort, Logan smiles, humming under his breath. This wasn’t his usual idea of fun, and although he was certainly very happy for his friends, social gatherings and anything that required an expectation of certain reactions from him, were not his forte at all.

Somehow he still got the job of walking Patton down the aisle though.

Speaking of the man, he appears beside them “boo,” the eldest giggles, and Virgil actually jumps before swatting aimlessly in the others direction. “Excited? I am!”

“It’s your wedding Patton,” Logan replies with a bemused smirk “You’re supposed to be excited,” Virgil snorts in response, looking down at the basket of flower petals again. “But yes, we are certainly very honored to be here, and excited for you too uh...” He trails off, trying to articulate what he’s thinking.

“This is so why Thomas gets to do the best man speech,” Virgil comments, flicking a single petal in the direction of the elder man. The more logical of the four nods, accepting those emotional speeches were really, and decidedly, not his thing at all. “Oh is that my cue, oh shhh---sugar,” Patton giggles as Virgil starts the procession with his basket of petals, trying to evenly distribute them (Except, of course, when he passes Remy and hurls a handful straight at the other’s face)

When Virgil takes his seat because he very much refuses to stand at the altar, he gives Thomas and Roman a small wave and thumbs up. Roman is dressed in a dark crimson suit, hair pulled back stylishly from his face, and subtle red and orange eyeshadow done up across his eyelids. Virgil spots a little bit of glitter and rolls his eyes, Roman can never resist some glitter. He was wearing a plain white shirt too. The music plays and everyone turns their head, but Virgil and Thomas are looking at Roman with a smile.

Everytime Roman sees Patton, it’s like he’s falling in love again, and it shows now more than ever as a smile breaks out across his face and his eyes blink back tears. Patton, who is wearing a pastel blue suit and a white shirt with blue flowers blooming all over them, matching the halo of flowers in his hair and bouquet in his hands, smiles back at Roman like they’re the only two in the room. Virgil wonders, distantly, if that’s a life he’ll ever get. He looks over his shoulder to meet Logan’s eye, who smiles back at him, maybe one day.

Roman looks like he’s actually, for the first time in his life, got stage fright as Logan lets go of Patton’s arm for the two to hold hands. Virgil smiles up at the two, content with their happiness for now, as they recite their vows and exchange the rings. He and Remy both pull immature childish expressions of sickliness as they kiss, whilst Thomas takes pictures.

Virgil thinks he catches Logan crying a little afterward, but by the time he’s blinked the other has pulled his composure together quickly. “Even Mr. Robot actually has emotions you know,” Roman comments, but pretends he hasn’t noticed when Logan joins them for drinks.

At some point, Patton starts too cut off the amounts of drinks they have. Remy, who is five small bottles of pink wine into the evening, is the first to have his drinking license confiscated. Roman was the next. Neither Logan nor Virgil were particularly drinkers, so they simply sat back and people watched with a smile.

Roman and Patton danced all night long, twirling around each other with all the energy their hearts could muster. The two were built with love and care and they had all the time in the world to share that with each other, and Patton’s fingertips traced Roman’s and the shorter’s head rests gently on the other’s chest, breathing in their happiness. It was wonderful to watch, if not melancholy for those who believed they could never achieve that.

“I know it’s our party, but we’re going to head off guys,” Roman says gently, nuzzling Patton’s hair as the other giggles. “We’ve got a marriage to consummate, and by that, I mean we’ve just heard the new series of It’s Always Sunny in Philidelphia is on Netflix and...” Virgil laughs and waves his hand.

“You guys have fun, I’ll make sure Remy doesn’t drink himself to death,”

"Patton has to throw his bouquet first though!” Thomas exclaims, resting his camera on the table “Also I’ve got loads of pictures for you guys, including of your first dance!” It wasn’t their first dance obviously, in their lives, but since they have been husbands. And it was very calming to watch, Roman guiding Patton whilst the other smiled dazedly up at the man who would be his for the rest of their lives. If it were anyone else, Virgil would have said it was gross.

“Patton’s throwing the bouquet, ladies, lords and nonbinary royalty!” Roman shouts and various people squeal. “Go on Virgil,” Virgil furrows his eyebrows because that’s really not his thing, but Patton’s face says he’s not throwing it until he’s joining in. With a roll of his eyes, Virgil moves to the back of the crowd.

“1! 2! 3!” People shout and Patton launches it back over his head, it flies way too the back, and lands firmly on Virgil’s face, causing him to grab it out of reaction. People cheered around him, and his face goes bright red, eyes wide. “Congrats Virgil!” He blinks, all he’d done was catch some flowers, with his face nonetheless.

Remy claps him on the back “If you’re the bar being set no one’s getting married for a good decade,” Virgil hits him with the flowers. “Ouch, you’ve had hold of them for less than two seconds and you’re already turning them into a weapon, girl, why, my poor head,” Virgil raises them again, eyes slightly narrowed, but a smile on his face.

He pretends not to notice Roman nodding frantically at Logan as he and Patton are leaving.

Logan, Thomas, Virgil, and Remy are the last to leave, promising to clean up a bit before they leave. Seeing as none of them bode well with sleep, there was a high chance they would be the only ones awake enough. Virgil stands on the balcony with one of the small bottles of wine, the wind carding through his hair soothingly. “Virgil?” He hums slightly and looks beside him to see Logan, face half cast in the darkness of the night, the light of the room behind him silhouetting his figure.

“Hey Lo,” Virgil says softly, offering the small bottle, Logan accepts it and takes a sip. They both lean against the balcony, looking up at the stars with careful regard. There’s a lot they want to say to each other, but right now, the silence is all that’s needed.

Virgil, despite his better judgment, leans his head on Logan’s shoulder, the elder takes a moment, smiles and wraps his arm around the smaller’s shoulders. Virgil smiles against the cold air and the taller man’s jacket, feeling the most relaxed he has all day. “You look really good, in that suit, I don’t think it made you look like you were going to a funeral,” It’s a kindness, although Logan may genuinely have not picked up that Roman had been joking, he had certainly picked up that Virgil had actually been worrying about it.

The purple haired man smiles and looks up at Logan, whose blue eyes look dark in the night and skin so pale it might be reflecting the moonlight. He smiles and shifts a little, his body angling towards Logan. He can almost see the gears turning in the other’s head as he moves a little, his eyes reading Virgil like an open book. The corners of his lips turn into a smile, his hand moving to rest on Virgil’s waist. They take a second to just look at each other, read each other’s reactions before the shorter is leaning up on his tiptoes.

He’s not going to ever admit that he’s actually seriously thought or daydreamed about kissing Logan before. But if he had, which he hasn’t, this is exactly how he’d imagined it. Soft, hesitant, looking for guidance. For once in his life, this was something Logan did not know everything about and no amount of textbooks could have prepared him either. But he feels the elder smiling as they pull away from their gentle, short kiss, their foreheads resting as they let their brains catch up with their emotions.

It doesn’t take long before they’re pulling back together again.

@analogical-mess // @unikornavenger // @mycatshuman // @creativity-killed-thekitten//@theresneverenoughfandoms//@charmingprincey//@aclickonapostwillchangeyourlife//@heck-im-lost //@k9cat//@stilljittery//@romansleftshoulderpad //@sanderssideslibrary//@max-is-tired//@therealmoshar//@punsterterry//@trashypansexual //@miserykillme

Add yourself too my taglist: Sanders Sides/Thomas Sanders

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#royality #analogical #sanders sides

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ilovereadingandilovebreathing · 7 years

Text

Ch-Ch-Changes

Wow that’s a cheesy title, and I only partially apologize.

SO. This is my first Sanders Sides fic. I’m kind of excited about it, but this lil’ monster is an angsty mess, so we’ll see how it goes.

This fic is set to take place immediately after the filming of the “Making Changes” video (which I really love, so I have no idea why it had to be that one that inspired this nonsense. Also, hence the title), so Virgil is referred to as Anxiety here. I know, I hate it, too, but I’m being true to the timeline. (Edit: I JUST realized I called him “Virgil” like 12 times in this, so sorry I can’t even stick to my own author’s note.)

Summary: It’s not unusual for Anxiety to have issues with a video, but this time, things seem a little more tense than normal. As can be expected, the ever-lovable Patton swoops in and just wants to get to the bottom of what’s eating Anxiety.

Word Count: 1,855 (ish)

Pairing: Platonic Moxiety (MoralityxAnxiety)

Warnings: Angst, Self-Deprecation, Yelling, Crying, Mild cursing, Depression-like/Suicidal-like speech (ex: You’d be better off without me, kind of stuff), Mention of Spiders (please let me know if I missed any)

Also, because she was precious enough to say she’d like to be, I’m taking the lovely @ssides whose writing first inspired me to actually type this out.

A soft knock at his door.

"Anxiety? Kiddo? You in there? Can we talk?"

The Anxious Side could detect just a hint of a tremble in Patton's tone, and knowing he'd upset the sweet Side supplied him with a painful twinge of guilt. He had been a bit dramatic when he'd stalked off after the most recent Sanders Sides video, and throwing each of the other three a glare to beat satan probably didn't make anything better.

He'd glanced back long enough to gauge their responses: Logan typically unaltered; Roman dramatically responsive as always; Patton...plainly hurt. Like, really hurt. The Moral Side had immediately vanished with glistening eyes and hunched shoulders, and the shame of being the cause of that had haunted Anxiety all day.

"Yeah, Pat, what is it?" He kicked himself; it wasn't supposed to come out that harsh.

"Oh, uh, I just wanted to, you know, make sure...you're okay..."

Patton sighed.

"Anxiety, can I please come in?"

"Why?"

"I need to apologize."

"What?"

That got Anxiety's attention. Patton couldn't even kill a fly (seriously, Thomas swatted a fly last week, and Patton gave it a full-on funeral, eulogy and all), so what on earth could Patton think he'd done that required an apology?

"I said I need to-"

"I heard you." Anxiety mumbled as he opened his bedroom door. "For what? What on earth did you do to me? If anyone should apologize, it should be that punk-faced Prince."

"Now, kiddo-" Patton cut himself off when Anxiety physically braced himself for a stern talking-to. "Sorry, no lecture right now. It's apology time. I know we put you through a lot today, buddy, and I'm really sorry about that. We shouldn't have made you so uncomfortable by changing you around so much."

The Anxious Side's eyes went wide. None of the Sides had ever apologized for what they did in a video before.

"I-I mean...it's not okay..." Anxiety stuttered out, blushing a bit. He didn't want to give Patton a hard time, but he also respected Patton too much to lie to him. Plus, he was tired of pretending that what they did didn't bother him.

"I know." Patton looked him straight in the eyes, his own glistening behind his glasses. "I was wondering, kid- Anxiety, if you could tell me why that upset you so much. Obviously, you don't have to if you don't want to, but..."

Anxiety averted his gaze, feeling his stomach fluttering uncomfortably.

"It's okay if you don't want to, kiddo." Patton feigned a smile. "I just thought I'd ask."

As the other Side began to leave, Anxiety felt a strange sensation in his chest, a kind of aching disappointment and longing he'd never felt before.

"Patton-" Both Sides had wide eyes as Patton turned to see Anxiety's trembling fist white-knuckling the bottom of his cardigan. Patton didn't move for a full five seconds, and Anxiety felt sick.

He'd screwed up.

He looked too desperate.

Only he could freak out the most loving and devoted-

Anxiety’s cheeks burned when he felt Patton's hand on top of his, the Moral Side's soft palm and fingers enclosing his with a soft, loving squeeze. Patton's gaze strayed to the interior of Anxiety's room, and the anxious side took a deep breath, turning a little too quickly to lead the other into his corner of Thomas's mind.

------------------------------

No one has ever been inside Anxiety's room before, and having such a sweet, sunshine-y presence in his dominantly dark domain was startling, to say the least. Anxiety braced for Patton to scrutinize the gloom of his room but was shocked when Patton practically squealed, "Oh my GOODness Jack and Sally!!" and ran over to the Nightmare Before Christmas posters on the wall. "These are so cool!”

"Ah-thanks?" The Anxious Side replied, setting himself cross-legged on his bed as Patton took in the full scope of his habitat, noting the wide-eyed glance Patton shot toward his thick, decorative cobwebs. He'd conjured them up himself, and he was pretty proud of them.

"Uh, say, kiddo, there's no, uh, spiders in these webs, right?"

"Of course not, Pat, I can't make living things."

"Oh, good." Patton swallowed as he lowered himself on the bed, a comfortable, if not a tad awkward, distance from the Anxious Side. "So, about the whole...changes thing."

"R-right." Anxiety swallowed, his pulse picking up speed. He hated when someone's attention was so firmly placed on him like this, but....this was Patton, after all, the least judgmental being on the planet. If anyone deserved his confidence, it was this polo-wearing, cardigan-toting ball of sunshine. "Well, it's just...." How could he articulate it without sounding....whiny? Sad? Pathetic? Pathetic. "Remember the identity video?"

"Yeah, I do." Patton replied, a question in his tone.

"That's why. The whole "hunt for the identity" thing. I'm just....I still don't feel like I'm a part of the group yet, you know? Well, of course you don't know because you were there and accepted from the beginning..."

Anxiety peered up at Patton, surprised to meet an intent but sad gaze.

"And I'm still not. I don't feel accepted as a real member of the Sides because I just don’t fit in to the group as happily as the rest of you. I just seem to be a pest that hangs on for dear life because I find some inkling of purpose in trying to protect Thomas, even though it makes you guys so annoyed with me. Roman, especially, gives me a hard time, and Logan’s always on my case and you...."

He clenched his jaw, wanting to say just the right words.

"You're more patient with me and supportive, and I appreciate it, I really do..."

He bit his lip, willing the mounting fear to stay in check but unable to keep his voice from rising.

"But it's not enough. I just don't see my worth in it all, you know? I don't have a solid role or place in Thomas's life that can't be filled by all of you. The fear and worry aspect could be cancelled out by Logan taking over fight-or-flight, and Roman could be more free to dream without me. And-and you could be j-just as happy as you d-damn w-well please w-without me around to bring you d-down."

He didn't know when he started crying, but now Anxiety's body was wracked with sobs, his eye shadow spreading across his cheeks as the tears fell more steadily. He doubled over, crossing his arms, folding into himself, and holding himself as he was so used to doing, rocking himself as his emotional tremors shook the bed.

“S-so w-what’s the p-point of even h-having m-me around, y-y-you know? It’s not l-like I’m really w-wanted. I only c-cause t-trouble-”

His breath caught in his throat when he realized his weren't the only sobs filling the air; he looked past his bangs to find Patton hunched over, his head in his hands and tears moistening the sleeves of his cardigan. Anxiety had only ever seen one of the other sides cry (when Roman lost his favorite childhood stuffed animal, Mrs. Fluffybottom), and he certainly didn't expect to ever see Patton cry. He knew the Moral Side was incredibly emotional, but he always assumed that the positivity was delegated to Patton and negativity was reserved for him.

Why was Patton even crying?

Did he feel pity for Anxiety?

Was his story really so pathetic?

He held himself tighter, jumping when he suddenly felt a hand on his left shin. Patton, now hiccuping through sobs, gazed at the gloomy Side not with pity, but with what seemed to be genuine concern and sorrow. Patton's entire face was contorted in pain, and Anxiety's stomach clenched at the thought of having caused the closest thing he had to a friend so much distress.

"P-Pat, I'm sorry. I shouldn't h-have said that stuff. It’s all t-too m-much. I-I-I’m t-too m-much..." He trailed off. He was so pathetic; he couldn't even look at Patton-

"Anxiety." Patton cut in, his voice suddenly hardening. "How dare you say something like that?"

Anxiety froze, the sobs catching in his throat; he'd never heard such a tone come out of Patton before. It was firm, toeing the line of anger. He braced himself for the inevitable paternal protectiveness; he shouldn't have been so mean about he others-

"H-how D-DARE YOU say s-something like that about yourself?!"

Anxiety’s head shot up, eyes bulging and jaw clenched tight at the simultaneous anger, sadness, worry, and confusion plastered all over Patton’s features. He’d broken-

He couldn’t even process the thought before he felt the bed shift and arms pulling him forward. Patton embraced Anxiety with all of his strength, spluttering out," N-no one c-could EVER r-replace you! D-don't you d-dare say that! You are j-just as important as Logan a-and Roman a-and me! T-Thomas NEEDS you, Anxiety! W-we need you!" Patton took a deep breath, trying to compose himself in vain. "I...never w-want to hear you....s-say something....so...h-hateful....about yourself...again! D-do you understand?"

"I-"

"Anxiety." Patton loosened his hold just enough to let Anxiety breathe easier, truly steadying his tone as he spoke softly into the Anxious Side’s ear. "You have a place, right here with the rest of us. With me, and Logan, and Roman, and Thomas. We need you, Anxiety. You are irreplaceable and so important to all of us, especially Thomas. I need you to know that. I need you to know you matter, Anxiety."

Anxiety sat for a moment, awed and limp in Patton's embrace.

“ And...I love you so much. “

He...loves me?

Before he could stop them, Anxiety's arms were wrapped around Patton's back, hanging on for dear life as the sobs overtook him once more. No one had ever shown him physical affection like this before, or any affection, really, and Anxiety couldn't deny that this was the warmest and just....the most he had ever felt since he came to be. It caused a strange burning and clenching in his chest, a yearning to be held forever, a sorrow at knowing he'd missed out on something for so long, and the mounting fear that it would be over far too soon. The last fear was unfounded, for Patton sat and held Anxiety even after the tears stopped flowing and his trembles settled, not letting go until the Anxious Side let out a long sigh and released his hold.

"I'm sorry, Pat. I'm so sorry." Anxiety held Patton's gaze. "I can't say I'll never ever feel that way again, or act out again, but....can I at least know I can count on your when I do?"

"Of course, kiddo, whatever you need whenever you need it." Patton smiled.

"Thank you, Patton."

"So...do you wanna be alone now, or?....I was thinking we could watch a movie or something to settle down a bit. Your pick!"

Anxiety searched the other's face for a minute, and then, giving him a shy smile of his own, replied, "Yeah, Pat. I'd like that a lot."

“Alrighty, then!” Patton rose, offering Anxiety a hand before preparing to transfer them to his realm.

“Hey, Pat?”

“Yeah, kiddo?”

“I love you, too.”

All of my Sanders Sides fanfics

#Sanders Sides #Sanders Sides Fic #Sanders Sides Fanfic #Thomas Sanders #Moxiety #Patton Sanders #Virgil Sanders #Platonic Moxiety #TSfanfics

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