If you've never experienced a migraine before, consider yourself lucky...ugh
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no offense but if your friend is trying out a new hobby be fucking nice to them
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he says i hate everyone except you and that is addictive and that is kind of romantic and beautiful because you're young and you're kind of a sarcastic asshole too and you don't like bad boys, per say, but you don't really like good ones either. and you like that you were the exception, it felt like winning.
except life is not a romance book, and he was kind of being honest. he doesn't learn to be nice to your friends. he only tolerates your family. you have to beg him to come with you to birthday parties, he complains the whole time. you want to go on a date but - people are often there, wherever you're going. he's just so angry. about everything, is the thing. in the romance book, doesn't he eventually soften? can't you teach him, through your own sense of whimsy and comfort?
at first - you know introverts often need smaller friend groups, and honestly, you're fine staying at home too. you like the small, tidy life you occupy. you're not going to punish him for his personality type.
except: he really does hate everyone but you. which means he doesn't get along with his therapist. which means he has no one to talk to except for you. which means you take care of him constantly, since he otherwise has no one. which means you sometimes have to apologize for him. which means he keeps you home from seeing your friends because he hates them. you're the single exception.
about a decade from this experience, you'll type into google: how to know if a relationship is codependent.
he wraps an arm around you. i hate everyone except you. these days, you're learning what he's actually confessing is i have very little practice being kind.
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what do you mean youre technically a detransitioner cause of terf bullshit?
it's a v long story but i detransitioned for a couple of years when i was 16/17, for multiple reasons but mostly because i fell into the blaire white/kalvin garrah chamber of "you have to be This way to be trans otherwise you're not real".
i was already Deeply insecure about myself and my 'passing' and i was led to believe that i couldn't want to wear makeup or skirts, and i couldn't choose not to have bottom surgery, and i couldn't do anything but bind for 12+ hours a day to the point that my ribcage is still misshapen. basically i thought that if i wasn't suffering enough doing 'feminine' things, i couldn't really be trans, so i should just go back to being a girl and suck it up.
the terf bullshit is because i'd seen a lot of terfs/detransitioners talking about the 'dangers' of testosterone and how it would turn me into a horrible ugly evil monster and how there was nothing worse than wanting to be a man. which combined with 'you need to fully medically transition to be valid at all' creates some very dangerous and upsetting feelings to cope with.
it also came from trying really hard to put myself in a little box before i realised that my sexuality/gender are very fluid and it's FINE for me not to have a label and just do whatever i want. when i was 19 or so i went back to using they/them (and eventually he/him) and changed my name again because even though i like doing 'feminine' things, i don't want to be seen as a woman.
tldr: i was conditioned by transphobic/terf rhetorics to think that i was being trans the 'wrong' way so i couldn't be trans at all, so i believed i must actually be a girl if i still wanted to do 'feminine' things. nowadays i am a transmasc who does feminine things because i don't give two shits about what any transmed prick thinks of me anymore.
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morgana is so funny, she needed gwen out of the way, she literally could have just killed her, instead she went: "first of all I'm going to resurrect her old lover,"
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We very much need to become more aware of the cultural perception and criteria of fatness bc the latest online discussions of it are deeply embarrassing to read. Everyone has a different definition of fatness, and this is due to the way society dictates fatness in relation to others. A person could be called skinny or fat depending on the context, who or what theyre being compared to relative wise, clothing sizes, its all due to the stigma of fatness that makes any slight connection to it (being the slightest bit curvier compared to the stick thin standard, having a small stomach pouch, ect.) be seen as confirmation of fatness
But whats crucial to understand here is that bigger bodied fat people will never have the "privilege" of being considered skinny, and their existence is often treated as a way to make skinnier or mid-size people look thinner by comparison. Fatphobia is ALL about being afraid or uncomfortable with the biggest fat people, of being like them in any way. So while you are arguing about whether the latest "chubby rep" character is actually "average/normal sized" (i hate categorizing any body type as normal btw), maybe pause for a moment to consider if you or anyone else in this discussion has thought about fat people who could NOT be afforded the argument about whether theyre skinny, fat, or midsize. The ones who are unequivocally fat, with double or triple chins, fat rolls, large stomachs or double stomachs, ect. They are the ones being most left out of discussions and arguments about what constitutes as "really" fat/chubby, when they face the brunt of fatphobia and erasure the most
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