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#stabbed clean through the stomach from the back
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So like… Arthur can’t die can he. Man just straight up cannot die no matter how hard he tries. He should be dead like seven times over from the normal human-killing stuff, much less the whole Being Possessed By An Outer God thing. But he’s not dead. Somehow, he’s still plugging along.
Someone out there really does like him, don’t they?
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peachesofteal · 4 months
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Light On - single mom/neighbor fic - PTSD, mentions of death, trauma Simon Riley/female reader
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Simon’s boots are sticking to the floor.
He had scrubbed and scrubbed them, scratched a sponge against the sole and up over the toe, used coiled wool to try to scrape the bits and pieces from the bottom, digging deeply into the cracks to try to dislodge anything leftover from the last month. The heat made it a particularly difficult task, melting together the dirt and blood, sealing it to the rubber in a congealed mess that he couldn’t clean off.
It’s spring now, and his breath doesn’t fog through the air like it did before he left. The mornings are coated in a prickly frozen dew that sparkles just right in the sunrise, refracting orange and pink hues into the building’s front lobby, washing over the bland egg white walls and coloring them into a spectacle, cold shadows of night chased away by the long fingers of warm daylight.
His boots scuff along the hallway, squeaking like they’re trying to announce his arrival, trying to give up his position before he deems it necessary, before he gets inside the entryway, blasting a signal through the flat that he’s home, that he’s made it. The sound of his boots competes with the buzzing that’s bouncing around in the back of his skull, sawing through the soft, pink mush of his brain, trying hack away at the only good pieces he has left. It’s gotten louder since he parked the car, competing with the drum beat of his heart, the churning of anxiety and anticipation in his stomach. He’s so, so close, and still a thousand miles away from you, even though he’s in the kitchen. His fingers grip fast to his bag, canvas straps twisted around his wrist, and he holds his breath, world rotating in slow motion as he listens for you, catches the musical note of your voice in Emma’s room. His spine stays stiff, unsure, and the buzzing that bites at his synapses gets louder, fills his head with the low rumble of fear that’s been simmering beneath the surface since he stepped out this door a month ago. You’re safe. You’re here. You and Emmaline are fine. You’ve been texting him everyday. You’re safe. You’re-
“Simon?” He blinks. You’re in the kitchen with him, eyes sleepy, Emma in your arms. One of his t shirts sits at your hips, plaid robe half falling off your shoulder. She’s more awake than you appear to be, and he begs his mouth to work, encourages his tongue to move so he can talk to you, so he can say “good morning, sorry I didn’t call, wanted to surprise you.” Or “hi, good morning, I missed you so much.”
But he can’t. Because all he can see, all he can taste, is blood. He doesn’t see his girl, he sees you broken and limp on the floor. He doesn’t see his baby, he sees Joseph’s lifeless body. He sees the carnage of this last op, hears the dying draw of a last breath, over and over.
“Hey.” Your fingers tentatively skim along his forearm. “You’re still dressed.” You note, and he nods, locked up, trying to push the buzzsaw in his brain away. He didn’t change, showered at the safe house before the flight home, and then immediately headed your way, his uniform clean, untouched by the gore and misery, still starched and formal unlike his tac gear, all of it made to wring the blood from its stitching over and over again. “Simon, someone wants to see you.” Emma’s now half in his arms, cooing at him, carefully supported in your hands, and he instinctively curls around her, swooping low to nose along her scalp.
The reverberations cease. The buzzing and gnawing and stabbing into his brain silences, just like that, and he fills his lungs with air, one hand now cradling your face, the other warm beneath Emma’s weight.
“Welcome home.” It’s a whisper, the softest, sweetest thing he’s ever heard, and he smiles beneath the balaclava, pressing his lips to your forehead. “We missed you.”
“I missed you too.” He murmurs. He wonders if the moment has passed, if he should be stepping away now, and he flexes, testing- only to be pulled back, an arm sliding around his back, anchoring him closer, tighter.
“Just stay here for a minute.” Stay. Stay here with you, stay with his girls. His voice roughens as he croaks out an answer.
“Always.”
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mockerycrow · 1 year
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Love your works! May I please get a "don't worry, i'm not going anywhere." with Ghost? Take your time, I love what you write!
400 Follower Celebration
—“Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere.”— With Ghost
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Summary: You’re apart of the 141 and Ghost recently had a near-death experience. You’ve been plagued with nightmares about the situation, but you try to hide it from him, feeling selfish about your night terrors. One night, you’re thoroughly convinced Ghost had actually died.
A/N: THANK YOUUU I KEEP BLUSHING ILY AND TYSM FOR 500 FOLLOWERS
[WARNINGS: vomit, detailed nightmares, panic attack, gore, fake-death, angst, hurt/comfort.]
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It was always the same nightmare. It was a repeat of that one mission months ago—nearly a year ago by now, where you and your team went to grab some important intel about a new uprising cartel that was showing some dangerous potential. It was a large compound, four floors including the basement, wide rooms with many blind-spots. Using your rifle equipped with a heat signature sensor, you swept room to room, leading your team through the building, putting anyone down who dared fired a bullet at you or your team.
You turn that familiar corner and your heart sinks. You’ve tried many times to change the course of this dream, but no matter how frantically you try to scream about what is waiting on the other side of that door, your mouth refuses to work until Ghost rumbles out, “I’ll take point.” You try to fight every muscle in your body to stop this, but it’s like the dream freezes until you continue down the.. “right path”. Quite literally is a living fucking hell for you, and there’s absolutely nothing you can do to stop it except do what it wants you to do.
“Roger.” You mutter, backing up behind Ghost instead of staying in front of him and leading him the others. The others are always blank faced soldiers in this nightmare, but you know who is who. You pat his shoulder, aimming over him as you walk down the hall close together, hugging the wall. You’ve been through this so many times, you know to eye the floor and you watch the moment happen—Ghost steps on a pressure plate and—BOOM.
You’re always forced to watch it in slow motion; the wall being blown open right next to Ghost, watching the debris scatter everywhere, scraping yourself up as well as Ghost. He raises his arm to shield his face from whatever is happening, unable to process in time that a man wielding a sharp combat knife is pulling his arm back and comes down with it.
You watch the way the knife so easily slides into his rib cage, and it’s almost like you could hear it penetrating his lung like it did—but this time, the man rips the knife out and does it again and again and again—this has never happened before—Ghost’s falling to the ground, his blood splattering everywhere, fuck, it’s like the guy is trying to gut him—but you can’t move. You have to sit there and watch this man. plunge a knife in and out of Ghost’s chest until he finally decides to stab him deep and yank downwards, spilling his intestines and stomach—yet, his lifeless eyes keep eye contact the entire time.
Your eyes fly open, dizzy from your heart pounding and unable to focus, you throw the blanket off of you and you make your way out of whatever room you’re in—you’re too freaked out to know. Your chest aches and feels like there’s a hundred tons sitting on your rib cage, restricting your breathing. You keep walking until you bump into something and you manage to focus enough to notice it’s the bathroom door. Your hand shakily grabs the doorknob and opens it, and you already feel the vomit traveling up your throat.
You end up bent over the open toilet, body heaving with every exile of the contents of your stomach, which by this time of night is mostly just bile. Your head is spinning and your hands keep shaking and by this point, you really don’t care how clean this bathroom is. You lean your elbows on the toilet rim and hold your head in your hands, trying your best to stifle a sob, even though all you can smell and feel is his blood on your fingertips. Your tears drip down your cheeks and collect at your chin before dripping off.
You keep one arm on the toilet seat to keep your head propped up and the other goes around your stomach, which is twisting painfully inside of your gut, ripping another sob from you. You gag into the toilet, but you’ve already thrown everything you had inside. Your throat and nose burns from the stomach acid, but it doesn’t compare to the emotional pain of losing Ghost. You just stood there and watched him get gutted—why do you deserve to grieve when you could have prevented it in the first place? Someone killed the Ghost, and you let it fucking happen.
A large hand sprawls across the flat of your back which is accompanied by a low, gritty voice. Whoever it is says something, but you don’t quite hear them. It’s probably Price, trying to comfort you, trying to say there’s one thing you could’ve done to stop it, but you know there was something you could do, anything you could’ve done.
Price calls your name and you go to shove him away, but his hands wrap around your wrists, and the voice is more insistent. You choke on a sob and shake your head, struggling against him until you hear it—his voice. “Fuck, [Name], can you hear me?” Ghost’s voice. It’s his voice.
No. Your mind is playing tricks on you and you won’t fall for it, you won’t let yourself go through this horrendous grief for a second time. You try to curl up into a ball, wanting to grab at your hair or your clothes, just anything but be here. “Look at me.” His hands grab your face and force your face to look at him and..
It’s him. It’s Ghost.
All of your noises stop for a moment as you stare with wide eyes that are full of unfallen tears, eyes full of grief, all for him. Ghost stares back at you with uncharacteristically wide eyes, and you can see the way his hands are slightly trembling—he’s worried about you. Ghost’s eyebrows furrow when he sees your expression of anguish. “Hey—hey, what happened?” Ghost’s voice is so quiet, like he’s afraid you’ll break if he speaks any louder. Your hands come up to his mask and touch it and you burst into a harsh sob again, throwing your arms around him.
Usually, Ghost would hesitate. He would be reluctant to reciprocate such personal touch, such desperation, but he pulls you close into his arms without a second thought. Your hands grab his shirt and you breakdown into his chest, wetting the fabric with your tears. His heart slipped a beat because he’s never seen you like this—has never seen you break down this horribly.
He’d be here when you were ready to talk about it, but for now he’ll stay to hold you until your shoulders stop shaking. Ghost moves to sit on his bottom and you whimper in fear, like he’ll leave. “Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere.”
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cammys-imagines24 · 5 months
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°•Astarion When You're Injured•°
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On the one hand, oh no, his beloved is hurt.
On the other, gods is he turned on.
Now if you were actually at deaths door, that would be different.
Astarion would be a nervous, furious, tear stained wreck. Worrying that he'd lose the single most important thing in his cursed existence.
The one thing that truly matters in his life. You.
But, if you're injured from just the run of the mill scrapes you get yourself into? Well that's fair game for him to be horny as all hell.
The way you wince when you roll up your shirt, a stab wound gouged into your abdomen.
How the blood trickles down to your breeches and stains your flesh, the crimson glinting in the slant of moonlight coming in from your partially open tent...
He'll feel his pants grow tight.
"Darling, I know you're injured and probably aren't in the mood but I must say you look positively scrumptious right now."
Astarion will watch you like a hawk as you stumble about your tent, looking for alcohol, bandages, a needle and thread.
The way you bite your lip to stifle yet another whimper, the sweet scent of your blood in the air. He licks his lips.
Oh, he could just eat you right up.
"Kitten, you've got to stop whimpering and groaning unless you want me to ravage you this instant."
When Astarion sees you go to clean yourself up though, he'll be absolutely affronted.
"Ah, ah. Don't you dare grab that rag, my dear. Have you forgotten about little old me? I could clean the blood off of you far better."
He'll say, sinking down to his knees before you. Have no fear though, the vampire will lick your wound til not a single leaking drop of your blood is left.
"This really gets you going?"
You'll ask, bracing your hands upon his shoulders for balance, your skin tingling from his attentive mouth. He's so skilled that you've nearly forgotten about the pain. Nearly.
"Well, my sweet, I could do without the you getting stabbed part but how can I resist when you're dripping red in front of me? You don't know the effect you have on me."
Astarion won't be selfish enough to ask you to take care of the little, well big, problem in his pants however.
He loves you dearly and he is here to help, in anyway he can.
You are injured and he understands that what you need from him isn't unbridled passion but sincere affection.
He will offer to stitch you up himself, seeing as your wound is in an awkward position and you can't really see it unless you're in front of a mirror.
The pale elf will tell you to lie down while he practically straddles you to get closer to the afflicted area.
Crimson eyes twinkling, fangs pearly and white as he smiles but he'll be gentle.
Threading through your raw skin carefully and giving your thigh a few affirming squeezes with his other hand when you gasp.
"See, pet? Aren't I just the best lover you've ever had? Flesh isn't so different from fabric and my stitches are perfect, wouldn't you say?"
Afterwards he'll wrap your stomach in bandages and get you anything you need.
Medicine to make you feel better and of course, all the recuperation time you need.
So much so that if the others in your camp need you that he will shove them out of your tent and order them to leave you be.
You'll not be leaving your bed for awhile that's for sure. Not while he's here to act as your nurse.
When you ask him to lay in bed with you, Astarion will give you one of his rare, tender smiles. Genuine with no mischief.
The fact that you need him and want him near is still a marvel to him.
It warms his ice cold spawn heart.
Makes him feel things he hasn't felt in 200 years.
"Oh, alright. My body is yours, in more ways than one."
Astarion will joke, flirtatious smirk slotting back into place along his mouth but he'll slip into bed without a fuss.
Your head resting on his chest, him mindful of your wrapped up abdomen.
Once you've had your medicine, rejuvenating sleep will call to you but before that you whisper how much you love him. Your words quiet in the night, against his ruffled shirt.
He'll hear you all the same and it disarms him.
"I love you too, sweetheart. You have to learn to be more thoughtful of yourself. Can't have you dying on me, now can I?"
Astarion's voice velvet, his fingers tracing abstract patterns along your back.
In his comforting embrace your eyelids droop, the pain a distant throb that you wish to have pass. His cold chest soothing against your flushed, exhausted cheek.
He'll pull you even closer, if that's possible and kiss the crown of your head.
"Sleep now, darling. I'll be here with you. Always."
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deadsetobsessions · 4 months
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Jason cursed. This is on par for most of his evenings, as it was rare that he ever got a peaceful night. However, this? This takes the goddamn cake and smashes it on his face.
Red Hood stood, with a portable wet vacuum in his halo bed hands, cursing everything in the world as he cleaned and followed the small puddles of Lazarus water. The people in the streets give him a wide berth, having long learned the intricacies of Red101: if the Red Hood is doing weird shit but there’s no gun in his hand, you make sure you’re not the reason he’ll have a gun in his hand.
“O, you there?”
“Copy.”
“Mark this priority, would you?” His voice is tense, pissed. “Some bastard’s dripping Lazarus water all over my territory.”
A pause.
Oracle’s calm voice flowed through his helmet, “Then we’ll have to watch out for League influence. I’ll let the others know. Red Robin?”
Red Robin chimed in, “Yeah, already on it. It’s weird though, Ra’s isn’t supposed to be here for another two and a half weeks.”
“And how would you know about my grandfather’s movements?”
“Careful, Robin, I might become your grandma!” Red Robin chirped sadistically, before clicking off his comms, snickering at Robin’s spluttering.
“Jesus fuck. I’ll try to hunt down the bastard from the ground. O?”
“Can’t help you. The cameras around your area has been scrambled for the last half an hour.”
“Shit.” Red Hood tensed, one hand going for his pistol as the street’s current inhabitants wisely vacated the area.
“Hood. Don’t go in alone. It could be a trap.”
“Whatever, B, you’re not the boss of me.”
“Give me three minutes. I’m close by. Do not go in without back up, little wing.” Nightwing piped in, and Red Hood could hear the faint whooshing noises of a quiet grapple.
“Cass and I are close by as well. Staking out a place but we could be on standby if needed.”
Two taps. Cass’ tacit agreement.
“Got it.”
When Nightwing gets there, they follow the trail into a dead end with no sign of any scaling of the wall or secret passages.
“Fuck! What the fuck are we chasing, a ghost?”
“Don’t even joke like that-” Nightwing said. “You’ll set Red off again.”
Jason kicked at the wall.
“Fuck!”
——
On the other side of the wall, thirty minutes earlier:
“Life is like a hurricane, here in Duckberg…” Danny mumbled as he stumbled away. He’d saved his alley kids from a pretty serious mugging that ended with a stabbing that Danny foolishly allowed to touch him because he wanted to keep the wicked looking knife. Normally, he’d be able to brush this off, but with his recent injuries, mental stress, and the lack of food that is the hallmark of a homeless teenager, Danny barely kept himself conscious as he stumbled into a particularly dense in ectoplasm dead end.
“Napping place… napping place…” Danny mumbled before eyeing the brick wall. Yeah, okay, he’s slept in weirder places. He could sleep in the dumpster, but… he’d smell and Danny could not handle an infection. So, he went intangible, invisible, and pulled the knife out of his body. As he settled in (quite literally into) the stone wall for his nap, Danny manages to mold his ectoplasm to hold his cut up stomach together.
Danny allows sleep to take him, blissfully unaware of the glowing green puddles of ghost blood he’d left behind.
——
Jason, terrified: he’s in the walls!! He’s in the fucking walls!
Danny, quoting vines and tiktoks while napping in walls for that back support option: thanks for checking in! I’m still a piece of GaRBaGe.
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greatdenimbeast · 1 month
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Diamond Castle au- introducing, Shadow, Muse of History, Astrology and Astronomy
Once a mortal in ancient Greece, moulded from clay by an inventor and brought to life by the blood of a god, he spent his years caring for his ill sister, Maria. Doing his best to assist his creator in finding a cure. Since the blood of god ran through his veins and, seeing that his existence was a miracle in of itself, it stood to reason that he could be the miracle that helped save her
Cuz he was quite literally born yesterday, his sister loved to tell him stories about historic events, tales of gods and heroes to teach him about the world and how it cane to be. She was a damn good storyteller too, always leaving Shadow craving for more.
His favourites were the ones related to the stars, the constellations, so much so that Gerald noticed and taught him how to properly chart them
Maria wasn’t allowed to leave the house, her grandfather fearing that the elements would be too much for her and that often made her sunny demeanour dull and, looking to cheer her up, he did his best to find ways to brighten her mood until found one that worked
He entertained his bed-ridden sister with tales of history, of old dead heroes, of gods, of prophecies, things that he had picked up from local traders and travellers when he was out running errands for Gerald.
Maria was enthralled by them, hanging off of his every word
“The island of Crete truly holds such a monster?”
“It’s travellers gossip, but who’s to truly say.”
He wasn’t as good of a storyteller as she was but he did keep record of every story he could, and Maria loved it so that was all that mattered
As Maria got worse, Shadow started praying and giving offerings to the god Asclepius and the god Apollo, he doubted they would come to his aid but if there was a chance they could help he wanted to be sure.
But it was getting harder to cure her, some of the medicinal herbs they needed grew far off and the merchants that brought them to the markets to sell them kept marking up the prices out of greed. So Shadow, who had been blessed with inhuman speed, was sent off to pick the herbs himself, allowing him the opportunity to venture and see more of the world and bring back more stories, even making a few of his own, slaying a few monsters on the the way
The soldiers for the nearby king didn’t make it easier, tormenting the people for laughs, outright stealing, sometimes outright killing people when they refused to cave to their demands. Gerald was always being pulled away from his work for a cure to craft machines and statues for the king, the only reason the soldiers were unable to harm him or Maria when he refused was because of Shadow being there to protect them.
This became an issue when the king decided that he wanted Shadow
Soldiers stormed the house and workshop, taking the inventor prisoner, dragging him away to the castle and as Shadow tries to get Maria to safety she pushes him out of the way of blade and gets stabbed through her stomach
Shadow blacks out.
When he comes back, his hands are covered in blood, the bodies of dead soldiers litter the floor, his ears are ringing.
The only other breathing Shadow could hear besides his own was the shaky, laboured breaths of his older sister
He rushed to her side and examined her, the wound was deep, too deep. He tried his beat to clean up the blood but he could barely see what he was doing past his own tears. As he did he prayed, to his other father, to Apollo, to any god that would listen, to please save his sister, to not let her die
Then Maria’s hand squeezing his stopped him
“Sh…Shadow… o-one more story…”
“Maria please, please, i have to treat this, I won’t let you die, i won’t let you, i can’t let you die!”
“One…one m-more… please?”
“…okay… okay, one more story.”
So he shakily told her a story, about the fabled diamond castle, the birthplace of music, home to the museum of music. He struggled to remember parts of the story but Maria shakily helped him fill in the blanks
Then as the story concluded, Apollo made his presence known and applauded the two on how exemplary their storytelling was. It turns out Shadow has gained Apollo’s attention for a while, ever since he started praying to him and he had an offer for him
He wanted him to be his muse, an inspiration, a god. Initially Shadow wanted to refuse until Maria winced and coughed in his arms, then he got an idea
“…Lord Apollo I will accept this honour on one condition, that you heal my sister of her wounds and her ailment so that she may live as freely as she wishes.”
Apollo accepted these terms and gave Shadow, ambrosia (the food of the gods). It burned away his mortality and left him a god
And Apollo fulfilled his part of the deal, healing his sister, and did Shadow one better by turning Maria immortal so that she may be Shadow’s attendant to assist him in his duties before whisking them both off to the diamond castle
50 years later Shadow meets the next muse
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ghouljams · 2 months
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King!Konig absolutely railing his darling till she can’t think after the assassination attempts, stab wound be damned (it probably only makes him more horny let’s be honest) is all I’m dreaming about this morning
He is a nasty man tha I unfortunately want 😔
What do you think he's calling her for??
You're led to the king's private drawing room, something small, comfortable, official off the throne room. The court physician is speaking as politely and hurriedly as you've ever heard a person, to a man that dwarfs him in every possible way even seated. You enter the room and König stands, ignoring what you assume is his physician's advice as well as the man himself. Your eyes dart to the blood soaking his shirt, the torn fabric that may as well be torn skin the way it bleeds. Your eyes are forced lower by the strain of König's pants, the bastard is hard.
"On your knees," He commands as you take a breathless step into the room. Your eyes snap to his, that dark malevolent gaze chills you, but it's not for you. You turn your attention to the physician, and see König tips his head curiously as you start to regain your composure.
"Get me some gauze," You order, moving to inspect the herbs laid out on the low table.
"I-" the physician looks nervously between you and your imposing patient.
"Now!" You snap at him. Above you König nods. You turn your attention to König, his eyes crinkle at the sides, smiling even under his chainmail hood. You narrow your eyes, and grit your teeth against the swell in your heart, "Lay down."
"Du bist herrisch, das gefällt mir." König's teeth flash through the tight chain, but he settles onto the couch all the same. The physician hands you a bundle of clean cloth as you drop herbs into the hot water bath a servant is placing on the table. "Everyone out," König bellows, as you dip the cloth into the makeshift tea. There's a scramble for the exit, and a grunt of pain as König strips his shirt off.
"Pants too," You tell him without looking up from your work. He doesn't argue, and you're quickly maneuvered onto his lap. König looks far too pleased with himself as you shift to find a comfortable position.
"You'll never get it in like that Liebling," He hums, gripping your skirt and ripping it up the middle. You press the soaked cloth against his wound in retaliation and he tips his head back with a hiss. You can feel his cock twitching under you, and just as quickly as you stanch the bleed he's lifting your hips and holding his cock against your entrance.
"König," You warn, ducking your head as your face heats, you wish he didn't have such an affect on you.
"I fucked you this morning liebchen, you'll be fine." He pushes into you and your fingers curl tighter into the cloth. You whine, feeling ever fat inch of his cock stretching you out, filling you full. It burns, just at the edge of too much, each lubricious inch of skin against your walls forcing you to make room for him. He scrapes against something deep and achingly tender and your back arches, your head tipped back as you swear.
You lean your weight onto his wound and he bucks up into you, filling you in one good thrust, hitting you so deep in your stomach you can't do anything but gasp. König murmurs some distant praise as you try to get your bearings, try being the operative word. The way he holds you down against his hips, forces you to put your weight either onto his cock or onto his wound, a vicious seesaw of pleasuring yourself, of pain-pleasuring him, makes you shiver, makes you beg for more. You're kept in place as König fucks into you, shallow but devastating, angling your hips so he hits exactly where he wants.
You squeeze your eyes shut, panting out moans and feeling an agonizing warmth churn in the pit of your stomach. A pressure that doesn't stop building, only lessons when he allows you a break, when he diverts your focus back to tending to his wound. You lean against your hands, attempting to get away from some of the pleasure he thrusts into you. You feel the squish of fabric, the flex of his muscles, hear the low groan of your king.
"Harder meine engel, or you'll never stop the bleeding," He sounds pleased with himself, breathless and excited. The new angle lets you feel the tight drag of him in and out, your cunt clenching to try and keep him where you want, while the rest of you aches and trembles. He's right, you know he's right, but you hardly have the mental fortitude to push as hard as you need to. Not with him moving you like a toy, hitting everything perfectly so that stars burst behind your closed eyes.
König's hand grasps the back of your neck and pulls you down tight against his chest. Your fingers press hard against the cloth, your body keeping pressure on as König growls, and plants his feet on the couch to fuck you harder. You shake against him, breathless punched out moans dripping from your lips, every muscle tensed until they aren't. Something drips between your legs, watery and slick, forced out by König's thick cock. It only eases the slide of his cock, lets you feel how absolutely destroyed you are for him.
"Giving orders like a queen, look at you now," König grunts, "coming on my cock like a whore." You nod, rub your cheek against his shoulder, lave your tongue against the taut lines of his throat. You can feel his chain mail draping over your forehead, your cheek. "This time-" König mumbles to himself, thrusting hard into you and stilling, "this time."
You feel the flood of heat as he spills into you. You whine, clenching around his cock as he breathes through his orgasm, fucking you with shallow thrusts as you milk him for every drop. His hips buck short, jerking with oversensitivity as he settles you back onto his lap. You swallow, try to get your head on as you tip it back to look at his covered face, his closed eyes, you rise and fall with his steady breaths.
"Does it hurt?" You fret, attempting to sit up enough to check his incredibly recent stab wound.
"Your pussy? No, it's very warm actually."
You could smack him, but he's already injured enough. "That's not funny."
"It's a little funny." He opens his eyes to smile at you and stops, making a soft pained noise. "Oh, liebling," He coos, switching his grip to swipe his thumb against your cheek, "don't cry, I'm alright."
Are you crying? You reach a damp, bloody hand to check, though it doesn't do more than smear the crimson over your cheek. You can feel the tightness in your throat, the sting in your eyes, even without seeing the tears. You pout at König, at the concern, at the interest, in his eyes. You hadn't even realized you were upset enough to cry.
"I'm fine," You tell him, wiping your cheek with your shoulder and refocusing on your work, "Don't look at me."
You're not surprised when he doesn't follow that order.
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ningvory · 3 months
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♡ ❚ ❚ ❚ ❚ ❚ ME & YOU ┊ kim minjeong
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parings: cop!gp!minjeong x criminal!f!reader
synopsis: after the gang you were affiliated with was found, cops came and and killed almost everyone. you were left with having to take them down yourself, just when you thought you thought you got them all, a young woman caught you. that woman being kim minjeong.
warnings: omg!? 1k followers already!? tysm you guys!! it’s only been a month and a few weeks since i started this blog and i had NO experience with writing, means a lot to me so i hope you enjoy this fic!! reader is lowkey a bitch, minjeong is cocky, violent, lotss of profanity, angry sex, minjeong fucks you in her office, oral (minjeong receiving), choking, cum swallowing, minjeong rubs your clit, overstimulation kinda, reader just needed a good fuck fr, unprotected sex (big no no guys!), cockwarming, minjeong’s office is soundproof, reader gets manhandled, they kiss like once, lmk if i missed anything!!
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breaking the rules was second nature. you were involved in a gang which could've been the best or the worst choice of your life. you were mainly known for stealing because of how quiet you are. they start to think you're a trained assassin. you never used violence unless it was absolutely necessary, you preferred to keep your hands clean from some randoms blood when doing your job. you always went for luxury items, you're a expensive girl, anything that caught your eye you got it.
the gang you're affiliated had been on the most wanted list for some time. most wanted criminals on the loose ever since some jackass decided to shoot a guy at the club for finding and swallowing the illegal drugs, which the police found after some time of fully inspecting it. when you were notified you wanted to kill the guy off yourself, you weren't into taking drugs so you questioned how hard is it to keep them unnoticed.
no one seem to be aware of the police finding the base so when you heard the sound of a door getting kicked down and gun shots being fired, you jumped. you were half asleep due to it being close to 3 in the morning, they must've picked a late time thinking that you all were asleep so you wouldn't put up much of a fight.
you quickly jumped out of your bed, adrenaline running in your veins as you found a knife and a gun. you wanted to accept your fate but your pride was ahead of you, you aren't going down without a bit of a fight. they would have to take you dead or unconscious.
you ran out your room and was met with chaos. what was known as your home has now became a battlefield, your friends and coworkers were dead on the floor, their blood surrounding them. this just fueled the flame but you knew to keep your composure.
you quietly went downstairs, not making a sound and began shooting at every cop you see. dodging their bullets and using their dead comrades as a shield as you ran toward them, getting close enough so you can stab them.
it was a one woman army, shooting them all until it was only you left standing, white dress gown drenched with their blood as well as the rest of your body. the smell of blood makes you sick to your stomach every time. just when you thought you killed them all, someone attempted to shoot you. making you drop your knife from the shock. the perpetrator took the opportunity to try and pin you down but you were quicker, you kick their side and pulled their hair, bringing their face close to yours.
you inspected the perpetrator, it was a woman who you gotta admit, is stunning with short dark orange hair that was faded to black who stared back at you. you were about to land a punch her way but was met with the feeling us electricity being zapped through you which made you let out a scream.
"bitch! get off of me!" you screamed at the woman you was sitting on your tummy.
your words seemed to phase her because she landed a forceful slap to the side of your face which made you yelp and attempt to hit her back. she was obviously more stronger than your current state because she almost effortlessly pinned your hand above you and used her other hand to choke you.
you were gasping and twisting your body around in a attempt to get her off of you. strangled moans and whines spilling from your mouth and tears filling your waterline, threatening to fall at any given moment. just when you felt you were completely out of air, she let go and placed a cloth over you lips and nose, forcing you to breathe in the substance on the cloth. your struggle evidently grew slower and less frantic and your eyes were half lidded, threatening to close as your vision began to blur until you were met with a void of darkness.
-
you jumped up from your sleep, breathing staggered and panic filled your eyes as you struggle to manage what all took place. your memories came back to you as you calmed your breathing, you've been caught, you're not even aware if anyone else made it out alive or if they were all killed. you took a look around the unfamiliar room and looked down at your body, you're now wearing an orange prison suit, with what appears to be black sneakers.
"you awake now sleepy beauty?" a husky voice spoke which made you turn your head to the direction of where you heard the voice.
it was the same woman from yesterday, manspreading in a chair in your room.
"were you watching me sleep? ever heard of privacy?" you questioned, attitude laced in your voice.
"say bye to privacy, you get none of that here. wake up 'cause this is your new life." she smirked looking dead in your eyes, fixing her posture in the chair.
"you've slept long, its already lunch time." she spoke again, standing up and walking to the door, which made you stand up when she put her fingers in a "come here" motion.
the woman, which now you know as, minjeong by her coworkers but winter to the prisoners gave you a tour around the prison. showing where everything is, you don't understand why she's doing this. all the prison movies you've seen never shown a cop giving fresh meat a tour.
you don't even know how long your sentence is but you surely hated this lifestyle, the food was so shitty you spit it back out.
"who the fuck is cooking back there because they personally need to get their ass beat for cooking this shit. i'd rather starve." you muttered.
"they'll force you to eat if you don't yourself. they go as far as to stick a tube in your tummy and feed you like that." an inmate told you.
you began chatting with the inmate that you found out was karina, she was totally gonna be your best friend in this hell hole.
the first few days have been okay, you always had an uncomfortable sleep because you were sleeping on literal metal. the other inmates would always look at you creepily which freaked you out a bit, especially in the shower room. but luckily karina came in there with you. with minjeong, you hated her. from her cock ass attitude to the way she would just look so fine. it just pissed you off all together and you made her aware of that. throwing mean words at her anytime you get such as, "bitch, don't touch me." "leave me the fuck alone, bitch." she let it slide but today it seemed she was in a bad mood and she wasn't having none of it.
you woke up and she was in your room, like always. you always poke your fun at her, wanting to hit a nerve so bad so you can laugh in her face.
"you're such a fuckin' creep. don't you have something better to do than be in my room everyday even when i'm sleep?" you questioned, trying to sound annoyed but you do in fact don't mind her in here.
she said nothing but stood up and walked over to you, hooded eyes staring back into your eyes. it startled you, taking a gulp as she walked over to you before grabbing your arm and yanking and you up. dragging you to an unknown place.
"yah! what the fuck — where are we going!?" you whispered not wanting to drag attention to yourself.
she remained quiet, but you felt her hand squeeze your arm, telling you to shut up. so you did, listening to her for the first time letting her drag you to wherever it was that she was taking you to.
you were dragged into what looked like an office, her office. you inspected the area wondering why she brought you here.
"the fuck are we in here for— ah! what the hell?!" you were cut off when you were pushed down to the ground right in front of her black couch.
minjeong stood right in front of you and that’s when you finally saw it, her hard boner pressing against her cop uniform. just the position of you guys had made it visible what she was gonna make you do making you gulp.
minjeong, after making sure you see her problem, started undressing her bottom half. once she took off her boxers her cock rested flat against her tummy, angry red cock leaking precum already.
“go on” she muttered out, patience running thin.
“hah! make me— mph!” the words died down in your throat because she sure as hell did force you.
her hands gripped your head, keeping your head in place while her hips were thrusting wildly into your warm mouth. tears were running down your face while you were gagging on her thick cock, hands on her thighs trying to push you outta her mouth but she was far more stronger than you.
“fuckk! you’re so pretty like th-this, not being a mean bitch. ngh! yea — just keep your pretty eyes on me.” minjeong groaned, forcing you to keep eye contact while she used you as a flesh light.
“fuck! g’na cum! and you’re gonna swallow it all.” she groaned.
her hips began to stutter as she picked up the pace, thrusting wildly into your mouth making you gag until she stopped. your nose was on her pelvis, throat burning while you’re trying to breathe through your nose. she finally came, seed shooting down your throat, more tears prickling your eyes as you swallowed up all of her seed.
she finally pulled out, strings of your spit connected to her cock until the string broke. you were gasping, trying to inhale as much air as you can. she barely gave you a break because she manhandled you on the couch and pushed into you, making you scream she was fucking into you with no prep, you never had something so big in you!
you were screaming trying to run away from her until she pined you to the couch. thrusts were fast and hard making your body push up with every thrust.
“nghh- ah! wait — slow down!!” you cried, eyes shut and back arching with your hands frantically looking for something to grip on.
it was like she didn’t even hear you, her hips had a mind of its own. she growled seeing her bulging your tummy, removing her hand to toy with your clit and the other to press down on your tummy bulge. making you let out pornographic moans which are basically screams until she shut you up with a kiss, all your moans were muffled by minjeong until you came all over her and her couch!
she let you ride out your high, pumping into you until she’s cumming into you, painting your tight walls white.
-
“you just needed a good fuck, huh?” minjeong said, your attitude was the complete opposite from your regular one with her. you were on her lap, head resting on her shoulder while cockwarming her.
“oh shut up!” you groaned, lightly hitting her making her chuckle.
let’s just say, this affair was between you and her and you both were fucked if anyone ever found out! <33
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xhoneygirlxx · 4 months
Text
he's not magic
eddie munson x fem!reader
summary: the time of the month has come and Eddie is the only person who can sooth you.
warnings: talks about menstrual cycles/blood. mentions of dying. tooth rotting fluff. Eddie is a cutie pie. pet names used; sweetheart, baby, honey. shitty writing/spelling errors; if you find any plz ignore it lolololololol.
a/n: i'm currently in so much pain from my period and the only thing i want is for someone to coddle me and tell me i'm going to be ok. i hope you guys enjoy this very small thing, it's not much and it's not good but maybe it'll help you feel good on those days when life is shit. love you all <3
--
You're dying, a slow, painful, and mournful death. At this point you stopped caring, stopping all the begging you've done all morning for your life to continue. If this was how you were going out than so be it, you just wished your end had come faster.
You've already bled through two pairs of panties and two pairs of shorts, now left in your trusty period panties and an oversized shirt. Your stomach was bloated to the point it was uncomfortable, your breasts were so swollen that your chest felt like it was going to concave under the weight, and your back felt as if it was going to snap in half at any moment.
It felt like you tried everything, ibuprofen, heating pad, and propping a pillow in between your legs - none of the tricks worked. Now you were left in the fetal position, arms wrapped around your middle and knees pulled to your chest.
For the past how ever many hours you've been moaning out in pain, the stabbing feeling in your uterus just too much to handle. You're sure if someone were to walk in and see you they'd think you were insane and right now you couldn't blame them.
You did look insane, hair wild and matted to your face from all the sweat you've accumulated, voice hoarse and scratchy from all the wounded animal sounds you've made, and your face screwed up in an unflattering way.
Your phone has gone unanswered all day, the only person to have texted you was Eddie. At first it was only tik toks, small comments he thought would make you giggle, and then it turned into him updating you about his day at work, and finally worried questions about if you were okay.
You felt so fucking guilty for not responding, not telling him that you were fine but you just physically couldn't move from your crouched position. This only made you angrier, the fact that your temporarily paralyzed and are restricted from doing the things you need to do.
The fridge sits empty and in need of new groceries, laundry stays piled up by the washer where they wait to be cleaned, and Eddie is waiting for your response worrying about your well being - that is if he hasn't already contacted the national guard to track your location.
Everything is so shitty, the pain, the hurting, the guilt, the frustration. You feel like you're a balloon that's been filled up too much and is waiting to burst at the seams.
You don't have to take long before the heated tears from your eyes fall down, hitting the bridge of your nose, only to land on the pillow beneath your head. It's not a violent cry, at least not yet, just frustrated tears that seem to slip away from their barricade.
You don't even notice the front door of your apartment opening or the sound of Eddie calling for your name, only focusing on the pulsating of your uterus that debilitates your body.
"Fuck, baby I've been worried about you," You don't even turn and look at him, your eyes are still harshly closed. By the sound of his voice you know he's out of breath, brown curls probably wild from the speed of his running.
"Shit, sweetheart, are you okay?" The worry in his voice hits right on the spiderweb crack, shattering you into a million little pieces.
You can't hold it back, the wailing that rips from your throat is something close to bone chilling. Tears streams from your eyes without relent, whole body shaking from the cries that rip from your body.
It doesn't take more than thirty seconds to feel the bed dip as your boyfriend crawls into bed next to you. He doesn't think twice before pulling you in, one arm wrapped around your back and the other soothing down your hair on the side of your head.
"It's okay, baby. M'here, you're okay." Eddie coos and it's like music to your ears.
The warmth from his body fills you in a way your heating pad couldn't. Even with the mucus that fills your nose you catch a whiff of his scent, smoke, pine, and outside -undoubtedly him. His calloused hand runs soothingly up and down your back, allowing your bones to relax into his touch.
Eddie doesn't have to ask, he knows you better than you know yourself, and the way your scrunched up on your bed and crying he knows that you've been battling your pain all day.
"Sweetheart, you have to breath. Can you do that for me? Take one big deep breath, s'all I want, okay?"
You nod your head against his chest, following the way his chest moves as he demonstrates for you. Between hiccupped breaths and streaming tears, you allow your lungs to fill up with as much air as you can take in, releasing it right after in one long exhale.
"Good job, baby. Did such a good job f'me." Eddie's being soft with you, a side of him he only allows you to see and no one else.
You let his praise melt over you, soaking it right up like the plants in a drought. For the first time since you woke up you feel lighter, something you only feel when Eddie's by you. The cramps that have been going nonstop have finally subsided, the presence of your boyfriend scaring them away.
"It hurt so bad, Eds. S'really bad today." Your voice is shaky, as if one wrong move and you can break out into another sob.
"I know, honey, but it's okay. I'm gonna take care of you, kay? I'm gonna make it all better."
You both know that he has no control over what your body decides to do but just the promise alone has your worries easing away. Your body relaxes into him, your knees slowly falling down to their normal position until your laying right up against him.
"On a scale from one to ten, where are you at?" You take a moment to think about it, really evaluating the squeezing of your organs.
"Was a ten but now it's like a seven."
Eddie hums, his hand still soothing up and down your back. A small pause settles over his words, like he's trying to wrack his brain for the next action he's going to make so you can feel better.
"How 'bout you get some rest, then when you get up we'll get you something to eat? Sound okay?" You nod again, too tired to form any sort of response.
Eddie acknowledges your response with a kiss to the top of your head, making you hum in content when he does. It doesn't take long for the tiredness of your body to settle over you, quiet snores coming from your nose in no time.
Even if his arms fall asleep and his back feels stiff, Eddie stays there with you, soothing you in your sleep to ensure that your pain stays at bay. When you do wake up he's right there, waiting for you with some water and more medicine before helping you into the shower.
He's not magic and he has no idea what to do when it comes to woman's health but Eddie Munson will be damned if a period makes his girl cry like that again.
---
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Text
Lover Boy
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Pairing: Simon “Ghost” Riley x f!reader
Warnings: just pure fluff i think (very corny, very cheesy but i think it's deserved)
Words: 6k
Synopsis: Ghost wants to do things the right way…
Ignore how cringey the photo is I’m struggling
Link to The Roommate Series Masterlist
You are currently reading chapter 7 of The Roommate Series
The first thing you noticed when you pulled the fresh and clean laundry out of the dryer was Simon’s jacket that you had snagged off the floor shortly after he had left early in the morning just a few days ago. You had debated on whether you would be able to handle washing it but the thought of leaving his bloody clothes in his hamper, sitting there as a reminder of what could’ve happened, made you want to throw up.
You had spent the last few days working the blood out of it, his shirt unfortunately unable to be saved, because you were determined to save this one piece of clothing of his. You weren’t sure why, you knew that he most likely would’ve tossed it, you’re sure he's done that with many of his clothes for the same reason, but you didn’t want it to come to that.
The jacket itself seemed pretty worn and though this was the first time you had gotten a proper look at it, your recognized that this was the jacket he always wore when he left to go to work. There wasn’t much to it, it seemed like a pretty standard coat, rain resistant that had a hood and enough layers to keep him warm, and it even had velcro patches on the arm where you had to rip off a UK flag from. 
You inspected it, making sure that the stain was truly gone and nearly smiled to yourself when you saw that there wasn’t a trace of it, before your finger poked through a hole on the fabric.
Your stomach dropped and you dared to look at the hole as you fought back against the pit in your stomach.
Part of you couldn’t believe that he had been stabbed with the full intention for him to not be able to walk back through your front door. There had been so much blood from something so violent, so traumatic and yet you were holding the jacket as if that were something completely normal.
It was normal. Normal for Simon but something completely alien to you.
Over the past few days, you hadn’t exactly been skirting around the topic of his job but you certainly didn’t bring it up even though you had a few questions. You knew how tense it made him when you asked, how panicked he got for a reason you didn’t want to ask, so for his sake you didn’t say anything.
It didn’t bother you not knowing, not in the sense that it would break up the friendship you had because you could very well live without the details. Still, that didn’t mean you weren’t curious and since he would be home for a while, you couldn’t help but think about it.
You glanced back at your room with a soft smile on your face as you stared at the closed door.
It was one of those rare moments where you had woken up before he did and it was only because he was still recovering from his injury. You would’ve stayed in bed with him, honestly it took a lot of self control to not go back to sleep in his arms when you had woken up, but you had planned to get most of your chores done so you could spend all of your time with him this weekend uninterrupted.
This was the last load of laundry you had to do and if you folded them quick enough then you could crawl back into his warmth before he woke up.
You placed the jacket into the laundry basket with some enthusiasm, the promise of falling asleep or even laying with Simon again enough to make you want to do your mundane chores.
Just as you were about to walk into the living room you felt your shirt being lightly tugged to stop you and the ghost of a touch against your lower back which caused you to shiver. 
A smile spread across your face and you turned around to see Simon.
He had just woken up. His hair was messy and his eyes were still bleary as he rubbed them, a look that a child who had just woken up set on his face as he stood in front of you bare chested but still bandaged up. You were surprised you hadn’t heard him, he wasn’t exactly as light footed as he usually was at the moment, but you were happy to see him nonetheless.
“Good morning.” You spoke lightly.
“You weren’t in bed.” He grunted and you raised the laundry basket up for him to see.
“Thought I’d start early.”
He eyed the laundry basket and you could see the thoughts racing through his mind: You shouldn’t be doing the laundry now that I’m here. I wonder if I could take the basket and fold it myself. I can’t believe laundry stole her away from me.
His eyebrows knitted together when he saw his jacket and he picked it out to the other clothes, inspecting it carefully as he made it look like a normal sized jacket in his hands. His eye went serious when he stuck his finger through the hole in it before he glanced at you.
“You didn’t have to wash it.” He said but you gave him a soft smile.
“I’m just glad I got the blood out.” You walked into the living room with him in tow as you set the basket on the floor. “Your patch should be somewhere in here.”
You searched around for the patch and when you turned around to give it to him, he was already folding the laundry. You weren’t as surprised as you thought you should’ve been considering the past few days had been a fight against him trying to do things around the house instead of resting. 
At every turn, he was trying to sweep the floors or washing the dishes or he was trying to fix something before you shooed him away. You practically had to push him back into his room or back onto the couch with threats about calling Price, who had messaged you yesterday asking about Simon’s recovery, to get him to stop pushing himself.
You had never seen him so restless before. You were worried that maybe his mind wasn’t exactly in the right place, that maybe he was fighting off the urge to hide away in his room but you also had a sneaking suspicion this was his attempt at making it up to you.
Making up to what, you weren’t entirely sure.
“Maybe I should tie you down to get you to rest.” You teased and didn’t miss the way he eyed you with a glint in his eyes. “Simon.”
“Didn’t say anything.” He didn’t look away from you as you noticed the faint hint of a smile on his features.
You couldn’t help but chuckle from the comment you made even as your face went warm. However, instead of dwelling on it and subjecting yourself to Simon’s flirting, which had been directed towards you more often than you expected these past few days, you decided to focus on the laundry. You wouldn’t get anything done today that you wanted to if you let him and you wanted to get the laundry put away.
You sat down next to him on the couch and smiled when you felt him press his thigh against yours. You put more of your weight against him in return and watched as his eyes softened while he continued to fold.
A smile pulled at your lips as you set the patch down.
“You know if you had waited, I could’ve made breakfast.” You teased and he hummed.
“I could fold while you make breakfast.” He countered and you shook your head.
“You’re allergic to giving yourself a break.”
“Slept pretty good past few nights.”
You gave him a look but he didn’t seem very phased, in fact he was a little smug about it which only made you playfully roll your eyes. You knew it was a losing battle, one that you had only won once a few nights ago, and it made you wonder if he was this stubborn with his coworkers. 
He bent down to grab the last of the items that needed to be folded and his eye twitched. You watched him fight the urge to put a hand on his side and you bit the inside of your cheek.
Simon had been recovering well considering he didn’t rest nearly as often as someone should for being stabbed and you couldn’t help but wonder if maybe that was because he was used to still being on the move despite any injuries he has received. The thought made you feel sick but you could only assume that the military was that brutal, especially when you assumed that’s where he got his scars.
Before you didn’t really think about them, it wasn’t your business, but now you wondered how many of them had happened in the same circumstances as his current injury. How many of them had been near death experiences? How many of them caused him to nearly bleed out? How many of them were close calls?
You heard your name being called and you blinked a few times before you realized you had been staring at his bandages. You looked up and met his eyes, watching as he gave you a sad look before he very gently took your hand into his.
“Feeling better today.” His eyes flickered down to your hand where he rubbed his thumb across your knuckles. “Just sore.”
You nodded, knowing that he wouldn’t lie to you about that, and gave his hand a quick squeeze. You let out the breath you had been holding, feeling a little less uneasy, though you found yourself glancing back at some of his scars, particularly the one so close to his eye.
You didn’t want to think of how that one happened.
The laundry was folded in no time and before you could even stand up to put it away, Simon had pulled the basket away from you, forcing you to make breakfast instead. Though, you were sure when he was finished he would make you sit so he could cook instead. 
Just as you pulled out the skillet, he walked into the kitchen and stepped into your space and looked at you expectantly while he held his hand out.
“You know I cook everyday when you’re gone.” You raised an eyebrow and watched him scowl.
“Now I’m home.” He argued and gestured for you to give him the skillet.
You handed him the skillet before you pulled out the food from the fridge, avoiding the arm that he was about to put out to stop you from going back to the stove. You watched the inner turmoil inside of him, the urge to fight you about this butting heads with the urge to let you do as you pleased before he conceded and let you stay beside him. 
You gave him a triumphant smile that caused him to scoff before the two of you began to cook together.
“So what do you want to do today?” You wondered as you added a pinch of spices into the breakfast. “We could go on a walk or stay in if you’re not up for anything outside.”
Simon was silent for a moment and you glanced at him to see that he had a very concentrated look on his face as he stared at the skillet. He almost instinctively leaned closely to you, your shoulders pressed against each other as his knuckles turned white, and you couldn’t help but lean into him as well as you waited patiently for him to speak.
When you put pressure against him, his eyes darted towards you before he looked away from you quickly. He shifted on his feet and let out a short breath before he looked back at you with hidden fear in his eyes.
“Was thinking maybe we could go on a date.” 
You blinked a few times as you stared at him with wide eyes, unable to say anything as the words failed to come to you. You couldn’t quite believe how forward he had just been about it, considering the most forward he had been was when he pinned you to the counter just a few nights ago, but this was entirely different than that. 
This was a date, not your first ever, but the first one you would have with Simon.
The emotions bubbling up inside of your stomach were almost too much for you as the giddiness surged through your veins and made you feel hot all over. You could hardly breathe, like all of the air inside your lungs had been stolen as you struggled to even think of a reply.
“Yes! I would love that.” You grinned after a moment and couldn’t stop.
Simon let out a deep breath and his once tense shoulders relaxed as he nodded, looking incredibly relieved by your answer before he ran a hand through his hair. He still avoided looking at you as the tips of his ear turned red as he focused on cooking breakfast instead of letting it burn.
“Great.” He said and you waited for him to say more as he plated the food made for the both of you.
Normally you would’ve been patient, knowing that Simon took his time to think of what to say, but you were too excited about the thought of going on a date with him.
“What are we doing? What did you have in mind?” You couldn’t help but stare at him with wide eyes as he sat across from you.
“Dinner. At a restaurant.” He looked almost unsure as he stared at, gauging your reaction to his suggestion as if his life depended on it.
You couldn’t help the grin split across your face even though you were quite surprised by the fact that he wanted to take you out. You were expecting him to suggest making you dinner inside the apartment, much like how his birthday had been spent, which would’ve been perfectly fine for you, but this made you even more excited. 
You didn’t even care what restaurant it was or even if the two of you didn’t get any food, you just wanted to go out with him.
Simon’s face fell with relief and he couldn’t help but smile as well, which you were sure made you both look like idiots. He let out a short sigh and began eating and you started talking, a lot more than usual, but he didn’t say anything to get you to stop.
You were too excited to really care anyway. You had thought a few times in the past about whether anything could come from being romantically involved with Simon and you thought about it even more since the night he had kissed you. You wondered if there would actually be something since he had never once talked about dating someone before or even looked interested in someone in the three years that you had known him.
Before you had wondered if maybe he just wasn’t somebody who wanted a partner and though it was a hard pill to swallow you had decided that whatever would happen would happen. It made your chest warm now that you knew he did want something, that he was trying to have something even though maybe he had it before. 
It was hard for you to wait for this evening, in fact it took everything in you to not tell him to just take you out right now. 
One look at Simon said he was feeling the same. 
You don’t remember a time before this moment where he looked this happy. Even though he wasn’t smiling as big as you or talking all that differently, you could see how much brighter his usual tired eyes were and how his shoulders had relaxed significantly since he had come home. 
He glanced up at you from his plate and your eyes met briefly but it was enough to nearly knock the wind out of your chest.
You always found comfort in his dark eyes. You knew that he had seen things that many others haven’t and yet he always managed to look at you softly. It had become something that you always looked for and even in this moment you looked for it, but you didn’t find it.
Instead you saw only what you could imagine was pure adoration. His eyes were incredibly warm even for someone who always gave you that safety. You knew he wasn’t someone who was very affectionate, even recently as your relationship changed so you never would’ve expected him to look at you any different. You tried to write it off as your mind playing tricks on you since you were overjoyed about going on a date with him, but when he spared you another glance as he took both of your plates to wash them, there was no mistaking it.
All you could see in his eyes was love.
~
You lost track of how many times you looked at yourself in the mirror, checking to make sure that your entire outfit and your makeup looked perfect. Never in your three years of living with Simon had you ever been worried about your appearance, even after you figured out your feelings for him, but when you needed that confidence, it was nowhere to be seen.
A dinner date. An official one, one that you had been properly asked out on by the very person you were in love with, which not only made you feel like you were on top of the world but had caused you to put some unseen pressure on yourself.
You didn’t want to let him down, you didn’t want to disappoint him and yet you couldn’t help but feel incredibly foolish for feeling so nervous about a simple dinner date. It wasn’t like you had never eaten dinner with him, in fact he was really the only other person you ate dinner with other than the occasional going out with friends, so in your mind there was no reason why you should be freaking out.
However you couldn’t help the fact that you saw every imperfection with your outfits to the point where you had changed at least four times already. You were trying hard to not work yourself up and as you looked in the mirror, you couldn’t help but think you didn’t look that good.
You glanced at the clock and clenched your jaw. 
There wasn’t that much time left and you didn’t want to make him wait but you were too conflicted about your outfit. You let out a short huff and weren't to change again when there was a knock at your door that had you holding your hands tightly together.
You should’ve known that he would want to go early just in case there was an emergency or some crazy reason why you both wouldn’t be able to get there on time. 
“Hold on!” You called out and made sure that you looked presentable.
You tried not to be harsh on yourself since you wanted to have fun but unfortunately, your mind wasn’t having it. Instead of showing that however, you opened the door with a smile, one that grew at the sight of Simon on the other side of the door.
He was dressed up in a black button down shirt that you didn’t even know he owned but looked quite nice in nonetheless. He had cut his hair and even shaved off the stubble on his face, making himself look more put together, though you wouldn’t have minded if he hadn’t since to you he looked pretty every day. 
Despite that, the effort made your heart swell, especially when you caught a whiff of cologne, that you also didn’t know he owned, mixed with his regular smell which had all thoughts pushed out of your mind.
Fuck, he smells really nice.
Simon stared at you and stepped closer to you, leaning into your space and taking over your senses with him. You could feel his warm breath on you as his eyes bounced around your face, spending just the right amount of time on the details he wanted to look at.
He was breathing slightly heavier and you saw his arm twitch as he nearly brought his hand up for a second before he swallowed hard.
You waited with bated breath for him to say something, anything at this point. You wanted him to reassure you that whatever was going in your head was a lie, that the weather was nice, or that his shirt was scratchy. His silence never bothered you, even now, but you desperately wanted him to say something just so you could find enough courage with his voice to push away your nervousness.
“You look nice.” You breathed out and watched as his eyes flicker to your lips. “I didn’t know you owned a shirt like that.”
Simon cleared his throat and absentmindedly rubbed a hand across his shirt as he took a step back. He nodded and it looked as though he were struggling to find the words as he looked at you so instead he put his attention to the door frame beside him.
“The old man got it for me.” He glanced back at you and he seemed to lose his voice. “You look…lovely.”
“Yeah? You think so?” You gave him an unsure smile because even though you didn’t want to make it seem like you were fishing for compliments, there was still that part of your mind that couldn’t stop thinking poorly.
“Yes.”
He looked sincere and serious as he stared at all of you. You had rarely ever seen him this serious and you wondered if maybe he had seen the insecurity written across your face or maybe in your eyes no matter how hard you tried to hide it. The look on his face made you sigh softly before a genuine smile spread across your face and you felt the ugly thoughts wash away from your mind.
“Thank you.”
You grabbed everything you needed and made sure that your outfit was put in place before you walked to the living room with Simon in tow. You went through a checklist with him, one that you knew wasn’t necessary since he had most likely ran through it multiple times in his head but you did it anyway.
You were about to walk out of the door when he stopped you.
“Shoes.” He gestured to your feet and you looked down at your feet with raised eyebrows.
“That would’ve been embarrassing.” You laughed and went to put your shoes on before he stopped you.
Simon didn’t say anything to you as he kneeled down and began to put your shoes on for you. You stared at him dumbfounded as your heart fluttered for a moment while he made sure they were on correctly and comfortably. 
He gave your ankle a soft squeeze when he was finished and set your foot down before he stood up. He gave you a quick glance before he grabbed what he needed after taking your wallet from you since he insisted on paying. He brushed his knuckles against your arm as he stepped past you and opened the door for you.
Your eyes softened and you couldn’t help but place a hand on his arm, giving it a squeeze as well, before you stepped outside with him right behind.
The ride to the restaurant wasn’t long but the both of you talked the entire way. It was easy conversation and for a moment you were content with just spending your time with him speaking about whatever came to mind. There was nothing different about it when you normally spoke to him, especially now since he had been home for longer than he had been before.
When he parked at the restaurant, you gave him an unsure look as you saw that it was one of the more expensive ones in town that you had always wanted to try but never had enough money for since you were a college student.
You couldn’t say anything as he helped you out of the car rendered speechless by the fact that he took you here for your first date. 
You entered the restaurant, followed closely behind by two other patrons, and made your way to a booth towards the back.
The dimly lit restaurant was beautiful in your opinion and you wondered if maybe he had been here before or if this was new for him. You were still speechless about everything until you opened the menu and saw the prices, which nearly made you grimace.
“Simon, are you sure?” You asked softly as you gave him an uncertain look that had his eyebrows knitting together.
“Why wouldn’t I be?” He stared at you and studied your face as if he were gauging to see if you needed to leave.
“It’s a little expensive.”
His eyes softened as he set the menu down for a moment and placed a hand on your wrist before giving you a gentle squeeze that had you letting out a sigh.
“I’ve got the money for it.” He reassured you and made sure that your worries were gone before he went back to looking at the menu.
You hummed, a question popping into your head but you were unsure if you should ask it. A server came and took your orders while you ruminated, wondering if you could say something or if it was better to leave it alone. You didn’t want to make him uncomfortable, not during a dinner where the two of you were going to enjoy delicious food and each other's company.
Simon tapped your foot with his and when you met his eyes, he gave you a look. His face had turned serious and it was easy to tell that he knew what you were thinking about. 
His shoulder did tense, but instead of looking angry or nervous, he gave you a short nod for you to go ahead and say what you wanted to.
“So you get paid well at your job.” You began, almost skirting around the question which you knew he didn’t like, but you decided to anyway.
“Not that much, enough to pay rent and eat.” He shrugged and rubbed his thumb across his water glass. “Sorry to crush your dreams.”
You laughed and rolled your eyes at his teasing, watching a small smile pull at his lips as his eyes flicker to yours. You scolded him lightly and though you wanted to tell him that you could care less if he had money or not, that you didn’t even question him about what his job was for three years, you decided not to.
Instead, you gathered enough courage to ask the real question on your mind, one that had been in your mind since John, Kyle, and Price had showed up at your shared apartment. It made you a little nervous as you fidgeted with your discarded straw wrapper.
“What rank are you?” You asked, chuckling nervously to yourself as that didn’t really sound right coming out of your mouth. “Is that how it works?”
“I’m a lieutenant.” He was straight to the point with a serious look in his eyes and you nodded slowly with indifference.
“And that’s good?”
Simon raised an eyebrow and you gave him a sheepish smile. It was clear you didn’t know as much as he assumed and you watched his shoulders relaxed ever so slightly. He shifted in his seat slightly as he stared at you, looking for something in your eyes but when he didn’t see it he continued. 
“Means I’m good at my job.” He said matter of factly and you felt your chest warm at his confidence. “I can tell Johnny and Kyle what to do when Price can’t.”
“Oh, so that’s why you’re bossy.” You teased, more of his behavior making sense to you now that you knew, and he sent you a look.
“I’m not bossy.”
It was your turn to send him a look as you raised an eyebrow, watching as he didn’t concede on that blatant lie. Simon just as stubborn as he was a little bossy, but he was never forceful or mean and always seemed to have the best interest in mind, which you always thought was him just being willing to do everything, which was still true, but now it was because he was used to telling people what to do.
Luckily for you if you told him to stop he would. You weren’t sure if John or Kyle had that luxury.
“You are a little bit.” You said but you didn’t make it sound like a bad thing which made him sigh with relief. “Especially when you want to do everything in the apartment.”
“That’s what I did before you moved in.” He told you and you shook your head.
It was a bad excuse.
When you had first moved in, when he was home, Simon would do everything around the apartment because of that. He had a routine he told you about and how he stuck to it even with you added to the equation, but after a year or so of you living with him he had dropped it.
This was something different.
Whether it be because he wanted to make up something to you or for another reason you weren’t sure, but you knew that he was doing this out of routine.
You were about to ask him why as your food was served and nearly did before he stopped you.
“I like…taking care of you.”
For a moment it was like the world had stopped. You stared at him with wide eyes as your entire body grew warm and you bit on your bottom lip. You blinked a few times, unsure of what to say as he stared at you with worried eyes as if he had said something wrong. You were so overwhelmed by the good feeling that washed over you, having never expected him to admit that outloud, that you were holding  yourself back from rushing around to the other side of the table to kiss him.
You wanted to. Your hands itched and suddenly your legs went restless as you felt the urge to shower him with as much love as you could before he got tired of it.
Simon pulled his hands into his lap and looked almost embarrassed for having said it but he didn’t look away from you.
“You shouldn’t have to do those things when I’m back.” He said softly and you managed to pull yourself out of your shock to give him a sad smile.
“You shouldn’t overwork yourself.” You countered, knowing how hard his job had to be, and he frowned.
“You do everything when I’m gone.”
“And I’m okay with that.”
He looked as if he wanted to argue with you but didn’t say anything. You saw that look, the one full of guilt he had given you the night had come back home and you felt your heart ache ever so slightly.
You scooted out of the booth, ignoring the confused look on his face, as you pushed your plate to his side and scooted in next to him. You gave him a warm smile as he made room for you, breathing in the good way he smelt, before you pressed your thigh against his in a way to comfort him without overwhelming him.
“We can do stuff together.” You suggested, though there was little room for negotiating, and began to eat your food. “It doesn’t have to be all on you.”
Simon was silent for a long moment as he stared at you but you didn’t mind. You could tell he was thinking as the guilt didn’t necessarily disappear from his eyes but was lessened as he put more of his weight against you.
He let out a soft sigh when your eyes met with each other and you watched them soften again as he got that adoring look that made you feel like you were on top of the world. 
He began to eat as well, staying quiet for a few moments before he hesitantly placed a hand on top of your thigh that made you shiver.
“Spend more time together.” He nodded and it made you smile as you placed your hand on top of his.
“Doing the little things.” You added with a soft voice rubbed your thumb across his knuckles.
“Normal things.”
The two of you ate and talked for a long time, you weren’t sure how long you had been in the restaurant but neither of you had cared in the slightest. It didn’t matter, not to you as you felt incredibly happy to just be with Simon. The food was so good that you both ended up taking leftovers after you had joked he had to take you there for every date from now on, though you were sure he’d really do it if you wanted him to.
You held onto his hand as you walked out of the restaurant, accidentally bumping the patrons who had walked in after you, and didn’t let go until you were in the car. You smiled the entire way back home that your cheeks hurt by the time you were getting ready for bed.
The two of you went through your regular routine and you were so ready to crawl into bed beside him you nearly skipped everything entirely. 
You felt Simon place a hand on your lower back when you were drying your face off from washing it and when you looked up from the towel to give him a smile, he gave you one back.
You were about to ask him if everything was okay when he pressed a soft kiss to your forehead, causing you to lean into him.
“You’re beautiful.” He whispered in your ear as he caressed your cheek.
“I just washed my face.” You giggled and he hummed as he pressed another kiss to your cheek. 
“Doesn’t matter.”
You pulled back and shook your head as he continued to caress your face. You leaned into his touch and watched as his eyes flickered to your lips which made you give him a coy look, knowing exactly what he was thinking about.
“There something you want?” You teased and he scoffed as he glanced up into your eyes.
“Heard it was bad to kiss on the first date.” There was a glint in his eyes as he stepped closer to you.
You raised an amused eyebrow and gave him an expectant look as you waited for him to close the gap between the both of you. When he didn’t you pursed your lips in a fake pout when you realized he was waiting for you to tell him he can kiss you.
“Well, I don’t think it’s a bad idea.” You faked a sigh. “Maybe I want one as well.”
“Be kinda bad if I didn’t then.”
“Oh, absolutely.”
Simon pulled you into him and pressed a tender kiss to your lips. He sighed when your lips met as he wrapped his arms around you to keep you secure to chest while you wrapped your arms around his neck. He very gently bit your bottom lip as one of his hands moved to your hip and he stuck his tongue inside when you let him.
You could taste every word that he said through the kiss, every feeling that he must’ve had trouble saying during the date and it only made your heart swell. You kissed him back, hoping that he would know everything you wanted to tell him too.
The way he made you feel like you were everything, the way things always felt good when he was home even when it was the bad days. It took everything in you to not utter those three words when you broke apart from the kiss…
I love you.
Link to part 8
A/N: I’ve been mean with the angst so I figured the best way to balance it out would be give y’all a little date. Excuse the poor dialogue i tried to write flirting but i have no flirting skills
The tag list is closed!! I am so happy that so many of you want to be tagged for this story but I will not be accepting anymore requests to tag people in this series since this list has gotten long and it's hard to keep track of how many I have to add! Sorry for the inconvenience!
Tags:
@kat-nee @alexwashere82 @suicidal-marshmellow @shuttlelauncher81 @poohkie90 @reiya-djarin @k4marina @mionacaped @igotmajordaddyissues @xxghostyx @pasta-m1lk @imstargazing @jacksonpleasestopkillingme @kgive @konig-is-bbygrl @lialacleaf @frazie99 @gremlin-ghuleh @spencerreidisbae123 @alastorhazbin @writingmysanity @lillianastuff @alastorhazbin @reid490 @lockleywife @sheepsel @dead-noodles @marshmallowtraver @sinclairbrosbathmat @sofasoap @crazyfandomist @iwmtfm @oiiviagrande @genesis1363 @revyjerry @guttabutta00 @greenkiki @d4z01 @quietlyignoringyou @mysticalgalaxysalad @almightywdm @maviee @lycheedr3ams @multitargaryen @fruitymoonbeams-blog @lilpothoscuttings @eatingtheworldsoffanfiction @adriennepoison
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yenqa · 4 months
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10 THINGS I HATE ABOUT YOU — TEASER
READ HERE!
in which...
you hate heeseung. you hate his snobby little voice, his stupid little glasses that are too big for him, his nosiness, and his ability to prove anything or anyone wrong easily. you hate hate hate the way you try to avoid him, but somehow he’s always around, and he can’t see how much you hate him. you swear nothing could make you like him, but after you get caught in a sticky situation with him playing your knight in shining armor, you realize that maybe he isn’t so bad after all.
pairing — heeseung x fem!reader
genre — one sided enemies to lovers, highschool au, he falls first she falls harder, oblivious x obvious, tutor x tutoree (kind of), childhood friends (ish because the whole one sided enemies thing) to lovers, long fic
wordcount — teaser is 1005! fic est. 9k-13k words (hopefully not too ambitious)
warnings — profanity, kissing (no suggestive stuff or nsfw), miscommunication, parties/underage drinking, name calling (bitch, whore, stuff like that), food
featuring — lia of itzy, miyeon of g-idle, hyung line of enhypen (sorry maknaes too many people), ocs : sooyun + teachers
disclaimer — i am not saying this is an accurate representation of these idols or trying to sexualize them at all. this just something i do for fun.
release date — hopefully by mid march?
taglist — open! send an ask or comment to be added!
yenqa — watched the movie on the plane and i was kind of obsessed… but this does not follow the movie plot, i just thought the title fit
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YOU WATCH AS THE SNOW FALLS SLOWLY TO THE GROUND
A blanket of white has got you and the guests at your house locked in for the night. You weren’t very happy with these strangers staying at your house for the night—In fact, you had just been completely shut down by your dad when you asked him to kick them out. It was obvious why he did that, but this definitely had to be your least favorite christmas out of the eight you had been through.
You snap out of your thoughts, continuing to eat whatever you had left on your plate, hesitating when you saw the amount of vegetables still left.
“Mom! I’m full.” You try to hide your plate from her, showing her instead a pout with a hand on your stomach. 
It didn’t work—obviously, so you were stuck at the table, a frown on your face as you forced in the greens. Across from you, a boy your age, who didn’t seem to mind, he almost looked like he was enjoying it.
That’s impossible though, no one likes vegetables. Maybe he was doing it so Santa would get him an extra special gift?
You grumble when he finishes his place, showcasing his plate that had been licked clean to his mom. He stared at you for a second looking down at your—full plate then looking back at his mom, she said “Great job Heeseung!”. He returns his plate to the table with a smile. 
Stabbing your fork back into your food, you stuff it into your face, hoping that you would enjoy it as much as Heeseung did. Again, it didn’t work, and the bitter taste returned to your mouth.
After what felt like hours of groaning and complaining, you had taken the last bite of your food, a proud smirk on your face when you made eye contact with the boy from earlier, who only smiled at you in return. 
Throwing away your plastic plate, you realized that now it was present time, and Santa just had to reward you for your good deeds.
Rushing over to the tree, you spot everyone gathered around the area, opening their presents. You run to your present, recognizing the wrapping paper from last year. Looking at your mom for approval, she nods and you tear apart the paper, lifting up the box inside.
You squeal when you see the picture, you had been begging your mom for weeks for a Lego set, specifically if it was minecraft themed. And Santa had gotten you just that. You hug the box, squeezing it. You exclaim a loud “Thank you Santa!” before running up to your room to assemble the build.
Reading the directions, you start the house, quickly getting confused on how it isn’t looking like how it does in the picture. 
“I think that’s the wrong piece.” A voice says, you whip your head around to see the same boy who sat across from you.
“Who are you?” Your eyebrows furrow at the sight, confused on why those were the first words he said instead of “Hi!” or something.
“My name’s Heeseung—Um, my mom told me to come upstairs and said we should be friends. Do you want to be friends?” 
You huff, “I’m Y/n. Also no, I don’t want to be friends, you’re mean.” You force your legos together, frustrated already with the pieces. You continue to reread the directions, pushing—what you think are—the exact legos to the board. But it doesn’t seem like it’ll fit. Maybe if you push it harder?
“Oh—okay.” You jump slightly, too focused to realize how he's been watching you for the past few minutes. “Do you need some help?”
Yes, you need help. But did you want to accept his help?  . This was your christmas gift from Santa, you shouldn’t have to share.
Glancing at the picture then to the building that had looked like an abstract rendition of it, you let out a sigh. I mean, it wouldn’t hurt, right? “Yeah, I guess.”
He takes a seat on the carpet next to you, focusing hard on the directions before breaking off the wrong pieces, reassembling it so you’ll be on the right track.
“Does this go here, do you think?” “No, it goes here.”  That was a summary of what the conversation was between you, and somehow you were always the one asking the question. Sighing, you lean back, taking a short stretch break before starting again.
You’re shocked at his speed and efficiency, it almost seems like he’s always a step ahead of you. Geez does this guy ever slow down? 
The roles are quickly switched as you are sitting watching him instead. Rummaging through each box only for his eyes to lighten up one he finds the right one. You watch him for a while, getting a break that you very much needed.
You hope that he waits for you to finish it, or that he doesn’t completely do it all by himself because again,  it’s your Christmas gift, and he wouldn’t do that, right?
Not right, because apparently he’s a machine—he finishes the build. He stands up, pushes his stupid glasses up also and smiles at you, heading to the door. You think he’s going to say something else like “Sorry for taking away your present!” instead, he thanks you for sharing and happily skipping away. 
Heeseung. Even his name infuriates you. He was very unpredictable and you hated that. Why did he just do that? He’s so rude. People don’t make sense—especially boys, they have cooties.
Your head was filled with calling him the rudest things you could think of—You even said a few curse words.
Though later you realized that you probably would never see him again, you were ecstatic, so ecstatic you had disassembled your legos just to rebuild it, to completely forget about your bad experience with the boy. 
Only two weeks later were you disappointed to see that same boy, sitting across from you during dinner once again.
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perm taglist — @jwnghyuns @ja4hyvn @trsrina @redm4ri @badmuni @yeokii @enhastolemyheart @softpia @s00buwu @ox1-lovesick @boyfhee @hanniluvi @teddywonss
yenqa © please do not copy, steal or translate.
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tarrynightss · 4 months
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Thinking about poor Ghost losing his love…
Tw: major character death, blood
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The apartment was completely quiet as Simon stepped in, relocking the door behind himself as he always did, pushing down the hood covering his face.
“Love? I’m home.”
He arched an eyebrow as he got no response. Usually you would run up to him, or at the very least call out to him from wherever you were. He called out your name as he stomped through the hallway, not bothering to take off his shoes as his heart started racing. Had you gone out without telling him? Had you fallen asleep? He opened the door to the living room, and all those thoughts turned into mere optimistic dreams.
You sat slumped on the couch, your hands laying flat beside you and your head hanging back at an uncomfortable angle. He didn’t even need to glance downwards at the blood spray or the dark puddle leaking out from under the couch. You were dead.
Simon stood frozen, staring at you, the reality not sinking in. It wasn’t you. It was just another corpse, like many he had seen before. It wasn’t you. Yet even as he repeated that mantra over and over again, his eyes watered up, light catching on the ring around your finger. The one he had used to propose to you to two months ago.
Your name left his throat in a strangled sob as he stumbled forward, crashing to his knee on the couch next to you. He gently cradled the back of your head, feeling his stomach churn at the sickening feeling of the blood and small yet noticeable hole under his fingers. He held you in his arms, taking in the almost peaceful look on your face as you blankly stared forward.
The sob that had been building up finally came out, and despite knowing he shouldn’t move you, he couldn’t find it in himself to care, crushing your motionless form against himself.
“No! No! God!”
He screamed as he pressed your bloodied head against his hoodie, stroking your hair from your face like it might bother you. This was because of him. There was no note, but he was certain of it. Someone had sniped you, clean and from afar, right through the large apartment window. It could’ve been Simon’s job, expertly done.
The sobs he let out wrecked his whole body, hugging you tighter and tighter against himself. The hard reality was right in front of him, yet he couldn’t seem to wrap his head around it. Just seven hours ago he had seen you, smiling brightly and kissing his cheek as he left. He should’ve stayed, should’ve been the one to take the bullet, but instead he had left as he always did. ‘I’m worried this job will one day cost you your life, Simon.’ He remembered your words, how you had frowned in sorrow at the thought. You were right. He had lost his life, his light, his everything.
Your skin was already cold as he pressed a weeping kiss to your forehead, fingers swiping gently over your eyelids to close them forever.
“I’m sorry, god, I’m so sorry.”
He pressed his forehead against yours, whispering apologies over and over again like it would change anything. As god knows how long passed, his grief started to get laced with anger, which grew and grew until he was gritting his teeth. Whoever did this would pay. They would suffer, over and over again till it was no longer possible to keep them alive. It would be a small comfort to the pain he felt, but he owed you this much. He owed you revenge.
Slowly, he put your body down on the couch, laying you flat like you were sleeping. It pained him greatly to leave you here, but he had to act fast. He would make sure someone picked up your body and had it taken care of. Before he left, he took your ring from your finger, stuffing it in the pocket over his heart.
“I’m sorry, love, don’t be sad, I won’t be long.”
With that promise, he left, rage and a burning need for revenge making his rattled body move. One step at a time, and then one stab at the time.
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awfcspencer · 4 months
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Hot Water Bottle || alessia russo x reader
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alessia russo x reader
prompt: Alessia takes care of you when you get a painful period.
warnings: period related things
Your body had been sending you signs that your period was approaching soon, your face broke out, you were particularly moody, and your lower back had hurt for the last week. So when you woke up at roughly 6 in the morning after a night of tossing and turning, you realized you had come on during the night, you were not surprised in the slightest. When your monthly visit from mother nature rolled around, your emotions and cravings were all over the place and often times you experienced unbearable cramps. Thankfully you didn’t bleed through onto the bed but you still needed to get up and shower, wanting to clean yourself up. Carefully trying to wiggle out of Alessia’s strong arms without waking her up, you fail miserably as she stirs slightly.
“Where are you going babe?” she asked, raspy voice laced with sleep still and her eyes slightly open, she felt your side of the bed empty.
You now had two options, tell Alessia you had come on and that would lead her to try to skip training and take care of you all day because she knew how rough your cramps were. Or option two, not tell Alessia, as you saw you having your period as a not sufficient excuse for her to skip.
“I am just gonna hop in the shower, woke up early. Go back to bed, you have training soon” you tell her in a whispered tone as you place a warm kiss on her cheek. Alessia simply hums in agreement and rolls over, fast asleep again in a few seconds.
Hoping to relieve yourself of some of the pain in your abdomen, the warm water instantly helps. You stay in the shower till the water begins to run cold. Getting out you grab one of Alessia’s old jumper and throw on a pair of loose sweats, not wanting anything too tight on. For some reason, the cramps you were having today were worsening while you tried to cook breakfast. Your body felt like it was betraying you, taking some tablets to hopefully help the painful shooting stabs in your torso.
Decked out in Arsenal gear, Alessia makes her way down to eat breakfast with you before leaving for training.
“Thanks for cooking baby” she says smiling. Before sitting down to eat, she walks over to where you were cleaning the last of the dishes you had used because you were hungry when you started cooking but by now the food made you slightly nauseous and your stomach hurt so bad that you didn’t even feel like eating anymore. She pulls you in for a hug, her arms pulling you close to her body as a small whimpers leaves your mouth at the sudden contact and the pain in your pelvis.
“What’s wrong? Are you okay?” she immediately is asking, eyes scanning your body rapidly to find some sort of physical injury.
“I’m all good love, just hit my toe on the floorboard” you told her, trying to sound convincing as you lied through your teeth.
You could tell she didn’t believe you and she went to speak but you pulled her in for a kiss to stop her in her tracks and usher her toward the table so she can eat. Breakfast went swimmingly other than that small incident, talking to Alessia about her upcoming game and all sorts of conversations. Next thing Alessia is leaving and you are now alone to curl up on the couch as your cramps have still not subsided.
You feel bloated and uncomfortable, desperately wishing you had told Alessia what was really going on, knowing she would help you feel better. But unfortunately you did not, so you spent most of your day smothering yourself in pillows and blankets trying to get comfortable. You try to relieve some of the pressure by drawing your knees as close to your chest as possible, curling up in a small ball as the day passes you by. You had been in and out of naps, awaking at painful jabs and then eventually falling back asleep. You knew where Alessia kept the warm water bottle but you were in too much pain to move, simply just suffering through it, figuring at some point, the pain would stop.
You don’t hear when Alessia returns home, but she can hear your small whines that left your mouth as you napped.
“Hey baby, wake up.” she softly whispers, gently shaking your shoulder. She pushes the little baby hairs out of your face as she takes notice of your hot body and the contorted grimace on your face.
“Are you feeling okay?” she asks, her tone laced with concern.
“I came on in the middle of the night and I am having bad cramps.” You reply, tired of lying because right now, you just need Alessia. Another painful cramp whipping through your body, a groan leaving your mouth. Alessia reaches out her hand to hold yours.
“I’m going to go fill the hot bottle and be back with more tablets baby. I promise I will be right back.” she tells you.
She returned with the items she promised to get. The now positioned hot water bottle on your abdomen mixed with the tablets you had taken began to bring relief.
“Baby why didn’t you say something this morning. I would skipped training.” she immediately asks you when she returns but she could tell you weren’t in a position to explain yourself. She slips in behind you on the couch, her chest pressing up against your achy back. Her strong hands gently massage circles into your abdomen. The act is soothing and begins to alleviate some of your pain and discomfort. You hum in response and eventually drift off into sleep. The two of you stayed in that position for a little while until Alessia got up, waking you up.
You whined half heartedly at the lost contact. Now that Alessia was home, you had become increasingly clingy, wanting to be near her as you were in pain.
“I am going to go run you a bath real quick, come upstairs in about 6 minutes okay?” she tells you, giving you a quick kiss before she left for the bathroom.
You met Alessia upstairs, a smell of lavender filling your nostrils. You couldn’t help but smile. Alessia was genuinely such a sweetheart and none of your previous partners had ever done anything like this for you. You notice she has set out new clothes for you, another one of Alessia’s jumper that was your favorite and joggers. Getting in the warm bath, Alessia leaves you to relax. Alessia had come in and check on you a few times to make sure you were still okay and asked if you needed anything. Alessia’s initial massage and the hot bath had helped your cramps subsided a bit, so you get out of the bath, change, and head back down towards Alessia.
Alessia had ordered in your favorite food and turned on Netflix so you two could enjoy a film. Your heart swelled everyday at the simple gestures that really were big gestures for you that Alessia did. You two eat and enjoy one another’s company before calling it a night and getting bed.
“Next time, I want you to tell me baby” she tells you as she pulls you closer to her.
“I know, I just didn’t want you to skip training just because I can’t handle some period cramps.”
“I want you to listen to me baby. I want to be there for you, I like taking care of you, I want to make you feel better. I don’t like when you are in pain.” she explains to you. You listened to her, relaxing more into her hold.
“Thank you baby, for everything.” you whispered to her before you fell right asleep.
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luvrxbunny · 8 months
Text
gone too long
Pairing: Steven Grant x F!Reader
Prompt: Masturbation
Warnings: 18+ MDNI, some angst (im sorry), masturbation, pillow humping, panty sniffing, piv, unprotected sex (lmk if I forgot anything)
WC: 3.2k
A/N: probably too long and emotional for kinktober but its my first time so bear with me please
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You’ve been away for almost a week now. Steven tried to be good, he tried but it’s been so hard without you. He goes to bed alone, hard, surrounded by your scent and wakes up the same way.
He spends hours in the night writhing around in bed. He can’t sleep anymore, you always used to get him off after he came home from work and again before bed to help him sleep but now he just spends his time missing you, squeezing his throbbing cock, and crying for you as he palms himself to the edge of orgasm, unallowed to get himself over the edge.
He wakes up in more pain than when he went to sleep. His dreams are all about you, some sexual, some domestic, but they all make him hard. He cries for you some more before starting a painfully cold shower and setting off for the day. 
 If you were coming home tomorrow it’d be a different story. Steven would’ve stayed good, he would’ve waited for you, but he’s had a particularly hard day today, and amid all the commotion he forgot that you wouldn’t be there to comfort him. He’s thinking about you the entire bus ride home but it never clicks. He thinks about how he’ll stop you from cooking and order takeout, he’ll ask you to ride him as you guys wait, he’ll make sure you take it slow, savoring the way you guys feel together, how your bodies mold into one another perfectly. 
He fattens up in his pants as he unlocks the front door, he swears he can hear the TV on inside. He thinks about how you’ll tell him all about whatever new show you’ve found while he undresses you. 
He’s met with the most hollow feeling when he opens his door and reality stabs straight into his heart. 
Tears well in his eyes as he takes deep breaths, trying to calm himself. He keeps breathing slowly as he takes his shoes off, and as he puts his coat up. He starts breathing out through his mouth when the hollow feeling doesn’t leave, he keeps it up as he unpacks his bag, setting everything back in its proper place for the weekend, and he starts up a pot of tea. It’s all futile though, because his tears come pouring out the moment he sits on the bed, your faint scent gets pushed out of the cushioning and the hollow feeling becomes part of his bones. 
He can’t even function for the rest of the night, he turns the stove off through his watery gaze and buries himself in the blankets. Surrounding himself in your scent as he cries himself to sleep. 
He’s soft and sensitive when he wakes up, a state you know how to handle perfectly. But you’re not home. He has his usual morning delirium as he reaches out for you, reality slapping him as he feels your cold side of the bed. 
He rolls over onto his stomach, burying his face in your pillow- the only thing on the bed that still smells like you. 
Three more days. 
His cock is already twitching against the mattress as he huffs your scent, he whines at the stimulation. He wants to be a good boy. You asked him to wait for you, you said he could touch himself but you wanted his balls full for you. But you must not have understood how hard this would be for him. His hips are already grinding into the mattress. 
She won’t find out. Can’t. She’s not here.
He reaches out blindly for your side dresser, knowing you keep spare underwear in there. He feels something a bit hard and his head raises quickly to see what it is. His cock spasms at the sight. 
His mind flashes back to two weeks ago. One night, you and Marc were a little too drunk and way too needy. He pulled your panties to the side, fucked you, and let you soak it in your juices as he came over your stomach. He was too tired to clean you up so Steven took over after Marc fell asleep. You were sleeping so in an attempt to cause less of a commotion he just threw your panties in this drawer. He must’ve forgotten to get rid of it. 
Fuck. 
His hand is shaking as he brings it up to his face. There are dried white streaks of your arousal running all over the crotch, a small circle of it from where your pussy cried for him. He can’t help but moan at the sight and brings the fabric to his nose. It still smells like you, like her. His tongue is darting out to taste it before his brain has even finished processing your smell. His cock spurts out loads of pre-cum into his briefs as he starts to thrust against the bed again. He pushes your pillow down to his crotch with one hand as the other holds your old, dried panties to his face.
He feels so dirty as he does this, almost disgusted with himself but pleasure clouds his mind over as he feels the softness of your pillow on his pulsing dick. It’s comparable to how your pussy feels to him, not as warm and nowhere near as wet but just as soft.
He’s face first on the bed, your panties directly over his face the way your pussy would be, his tongue prodding at where your pretty little hole should be. He’s groaning out your name in half sobs, wishing you were here, wishing you were the one touching him because as good as this all feels… you still feel so much better. 
He feels the molten pleasure work its way up his spine, he feels his balls begin to throb with the load they’ve prepared. He feels it coming, he can feel how much there’ll be and a pang of guilt that he’s not saving it for you. He knows how much you love when he fills you up, how whiny you get when you’re packed full of his load, how you mutter his name on repeat, begging him to fill you up. 
But the thought just works him further to the edge, he can feel his muscles tighten as his dick starts to pulse, he feels relief just out of reach, and a small guilty smile spreads over his face at how good this is going to feel. His mind races through scenes of you, unable to choose one to cum to, your name rests on the tip of his tongue as his hips stutter into the pillow one last time before
nothing happens.
He can feel his orgasm at the tip of his cock, right there and he wants you. He forms scene after scene in his head of how many different ways you’ll touch him when you get back. He thinks about how many times you’ll make him cum, how you’ll coo over his overfilled, swollen balls, how you’ll apologize to him as you fuck him into oblivion but nothing gets close to how he feels when your hands are on him. He needs you.
The realization is accompanied by a teary whimper of your name into the pillow.
The teary whimper is followed by an angelic sound of “Steven?”
His head snaps up and he’s scrambling out of bed before he can rationalize the fact that you’re not supposed to be home for another four days. 
But you’re actually here. 
You’re smiling at him as you place your coat on the rack, your boots already off and eyebrows raised as you wait for him to make his way over to you. He’s standing in the doorway frozen. He thinks he’s lost it, that he was right, all these days without you did drive him insane. 
I told her this would happen. 
His eyes well with tears as he tries to will himself to see the truth. His fists are bunching at his sides, angry at the hope he felt when he thought he heard you calling his name, having already been riled up at his futile attempt at relief. 
You’re growing concerned under his indecipherable stare. “Steven?” He gasps and his eyes widen. You approach him slowly and cautiously, worried at this odd reaction. He takes a hesitant step toward you and gasps at the small amused smile that blooms on your lips. 
“Are you okay, Stevie? I wanted to surprise you but you seem-” You pause to look him up and down, finally taking him all in and noticing the bulge and wet patch in his pants. Your expression changes from shock to sultry disappointment. “You seem like you’ve been bad.”
His eyes are still wide and watery. “Are you really here?”
Your mask drops with a sad smile. “Of course I am, baby. Did you miss me that much?” He envelopes you in a hug, burying his face in your neck, inhaling your scent with a shaky groan. 
“I m-missed you so much. I’ve been good.” He’s already got that distant, airy, aroused tone as he speaks. “I didn’t cum. I- ” He’s started to grind against you already, his bulge pressing itself into your thigh over and over as he grips your shoulders. He’s moved to the top of your head, inhaling the scent of your conditioner. “I wanted to- I tried.” 
His voice breaks at the end and you can’t stand it anymore. You grab the hair on the back of his head and roughly work him to your lips, relishing in the loud moan that breaks from his throat as your lips meet his. He’s trying to lick into your mouth immediately and you let him, you’ve missed the way he tastes. Only, when his tongue presses into yours, he tastes different… something familiar but it’s not him. You pull away confused and Steven’s lips chase yours with a whine. You have to hold his face away from yours to get his attention. 
“Steven, what is that?” He’s too delirious to understand what you’re asking, he just tilts his head like a puppy. You try not to let your endearment show through, attempting to be stern. “What’s that taste?” You can see his recognition flash over his face as he realizes what you’re asking but he starts shaking his head slowly and pulling you back in. “It’s just you, darling.”
You let him kiss you as you process, his words paired with the vaguely familiar taste let it click. You’re moaning into his mouth and pressing your thigh back into his weeping cock, earning a grateful moan from him. 
You walk him back to the bedroom desperately. You’ve been yearning for him as much as he has for you. You spent nights rolling around in bed, clit pulsing for him, unsatisfied with your ministrations. You tried fingering yourself but your fingers were nowhere near as long or as thick as his, you couldn’t hit the same spots he could. You tried. You push him onto the bed with a grunt and notice a pair of undies where your pillow should be. Confusion flies over your face before you look back at Steven, noticing his red face.
‘I tried’ 
The memory of what Steven said earlier finally makes sense to you. It also explained his desperate, disheveled state, why he was leaking and yearning for you. 
Arousal shoots between your legs like a jolt of electricity as you picture the scene; Steven grinding against- your pillow it seems- as he sniffed and licked at your panties. 
That’s why my taste was on his tongue…
Steven’s face is still burning red, looking anywhere but at you, as his hips uncontrollably twitch up for you, it brings a fond smile to your face. You take off your pants, matching him in your bottoms, and place yourself on his clothed bulge with a moan. You meant to tease him but it was already affecting you more than you anticipated. His hips are already thrusting into yours, his hands on your hips to hold you- press you down into him. He’s moaning out for you, whining about how good you feel but still trying to hide his face in his shoulder.
You give in and swivel your hips against him, earning a whole new level of volume from Steven. His hands aren’t just resting on your hips, they’re running all over your body wildly, grabbing and groping anything he comes across. You lean down to his ear and begin your questioning.
“So what are m- shit. What are my panties d-doing over here, S-Steven?” His name accidentally comes out as a moan as he drags your clit right over the tip of his dick. He’s not even looking at you, his eyes are fixed on where he’s rubbing you against himself, the way his tip dips into your soft skin and leaves streaks of his pre all along the fabric. His jaw is dropped open and little pants make their way past his wet lips. 
You can see this feral look in his eyes that you’ve never witnessed. He’s told you drunkenly how badly he craves you but you’ve never actually seen it, you’ve never really believed him. Like this, though? You can see what he was talking about. You can tell that he’s zeroed in on how good you’re making him feel, you don’t think he even heard you, too entranced with how he’s moving you along his cock. 
Your pussy clenches at the thought and he can feel it. He falls back against the bed with a groan before propping himself up on his elbows to pull you both back against the headboard. He whimpers at the momentary loss of friction but smiles once he can collapse onto the board while still staring at you. His hands come back to grip your hips, upset that you’ve stopped moving your hips without his help but you stop him. You lean forward on him, pressing most of your weight on his tip, he gasps and grips your arms with a moan. “Please! Oh Gods-”
You silence him with a short kiss, pulling away before he’s satisfied. He starts to mumble pleas to you again but your finger is pressed into his lips, he licks them, tasting your finger in the process and moaning at the taste of your skin. “Stevie…” You pause and he sighs at the sound of his name on your lips. “Did you use my underwear to get off?”
His eyes widen and dart to where they lay, exposed on the bed. You feel his cock twitch under you and you have to bite your lip to hold in a whine at the way it rubbed over your clit. He’s embarrased but turned on at the fact that he thought you’d never find out but you still did. The way that he could never hide anything from you, the way you don’t seem upset at the fact you caught him.
“I needed you so b- bad an’ you- an’ everything smells like you. I- I’m sorry.” He drops his head onto your shoulder as his hips slowly grind into you. “ ‘M sorry, alrigh’?” His accent gets heavier as he grinds into you more deliberately. “I just- I jus’ -oh I needed you so b-bad.” He whimpers into your neck, trying to muffle himself in there. You’re lost in the feeling, in his words as he humps his cock into you. He’s kissing along your neck, sometimes just licking at your sweat and moaning at the taste. His hips were starting to twitch and stutter into yours, his moans pitched up and his hands began to bruise into your skin. “I’m-”
You lift off of him. “No- Wh-y? P-please.” You ignore his plea and pull your shirt and underwear off as he scrambles to do the same. “Are we gonna-?” You smile at him softly and prepare for your confession. 
“I couldn’t get off without you, Steven.” You shift your weight nervously as he just stares at you. “I- My fingers aren’t enough anymore.” You whine at him and his cock jumps, leaking onto the sheets as he reaches out for you. He pulls you into a kiss and fumbles to take your bra off. He lets you climb over him again and moans into your mouth as you line him up with your soaked hole. “Put it in. Put it in- shit. P- put- ” He’s cut off by both your moans as you sink onto him. 
“Fuck I can t-tell your- fuck.” He whines out as you as you squeeze around him. “Your little fingers aren’t enough t’properly stretch you f’me hm?” His eyes roll back and his eyebrows draw inward as you grind onto his cock. You try to keep a steady pace but his tip is slamming right into your G-Spot, pressing into it no matter what he does, no matter how you move. Your legs give out halfway through a thrust and your body slams down onto him. He groans your name and hugs your body close, planting his feet on the mattress and fucking into you slowly.
“S’it too much?” You moan his name into his ear and his cock jumps inside you. “Fuck I’m-mm” His words get drawn into a whine as his thrusts slowly lose rhythm. Your pussy begins to clench on him, arousal coiling in your stomach at the telltale signs that he’s gonna cum. Steven’s hand comes to cradle your head into his neck, stoking your hair softly and whispering soft assurances and begs for you to cum around him. 
“‘M right here. I’ll take care of ‘ye, keep you nice an’ safe. C’mon. Give it t-to me.” Your orgasm explodes inside you like a solar flare. It bursts in your stomach and ripples throughout your whole body, moans are shoved from your mouth, almost deafening Steven with their volume and pitch but they only push him over the edge. His cock twitches violently inside you before releasing a torrent of cum. He tries to stay semi-calm as his orgasm crashes over him, his stomach won’t stop tensing under you and his mouth can’t shut. He can’t hold any of his moans in as his balls empty themselves inside you. 
He feels like it’ll never end, he’s at his peak for what feels like years. He can hear you distantly whining about how full you feel, about how much he’s filling you up. His hips have a mind of their own as he ruts into you pathetically, doing anything he can to prolong his euphoric high. He feels tears spring to his eyes, unable to believe that you could make him feel so good. He feels your lips over his mouth that’s propped open on a silent moan. He’s panting out whines down your throat as you whisper praises to him.
“W- It won’t stop. It- f-feels so go-od” He’s gasping at you as he speaks, his entire body shaking as his cock spurts out more ropes into you. You’re leaking all over his thighs, unable to hold all the cum he’s pumping into you. He moans out your name one last time before his body goes limp, and his cock finally stops spitting into you. He’s incoherent for quite some time, fading in and out of consciousness. 
He always whines out for you when he wakes up, sniffing and huffing until some part of you comes in contact with him. Once it does he’s pulling you into a crushing hug and doesn’t let go for at least another hour.
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Thank you so much for reading! If you enjoyed it, here's the rest of my Kinktober Works, and be sure to check out my Main Masterlist!!
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dilemmaontwolegs · 5 months
Text
Not A Verstappen: A New World {8}
Pairing: Charles Leclerc x fem!driver!reader x Lando Norris Summary: It's you first ever first anniversary and you hope you got it right. Warnings: 18+ only, nsfw, fluff, angst WC: 2.4k F1 Masterlist NAV: Sibling Rivalry One || Two || Three NAV: Gridlocked One || Two || Three || Four || Five || Six || Seven || Eight || Nine NAV: A New World One || Two || Three || Four || Five || Six || Seven || Eight || Nine
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Round Fourteen - Dutch GP 2023
It was the 1-2 finish you should have had a year ago and thankfully Max didn’t crash into you this time. Standing beside him on the podium as the home crowd cheered almost brought tears to your eyes. It wasn’t your ‘home’ race like it was for Max but the people had adopted you under their flags and banners anyway.
“What’s your plans tonight, zusje?” 
“It’s date night,” you said with a grin before handing over the jeroboam bottle of bubbly to your team. They deserved a piece of the celebration for their hard work on the car and you didn’t want to get drunk before the night began. “Charles is heading to Maranello tomorrow for testing so we are going to celebrate our first anniversary tonight.”
Max’s mouth parted in shock and he brushed a hand through his damp hair. “It has been a year already? Did anyone remind Lando?”
You rolled your eyes at his theatrics. “He’s not that bad at remembering dates.”
“Not that bad,” he echoed with a mocking tone. “He would be screwed without you and Charles to remind him.”
“Then it’s a good thing he has us,” you said as you waved to the crowd one last time before heading off the platform and back to the garage. You parted ways from Max as you went to the Aston Martin hospitality and he diverted to the Red Bull one. He was going to visit Jos while he was in the country, and you were glad he didn’t ask you to come, it saved you both from the awkwardness of the situation.
Lance looked defeated as he sat alone in a booth, everyone giving him a wide berth. Steering away from the path to your room, you took a seat opposite him.
“Tough race,” you commented softly.
His shoulders bounced with a laugh that held no humour. “Not for you, you got points.” His hands fidgeted with a napkin and he tore it to little shreds as he glared at the engineers walking into the motorhome. 
“You looked like you had a good break, did you do any sim work while you were on holiday?”
His lips twisted into a sneer and he shoved the rubbish across the table, the paper drifting onto your lap like snowflakes. “I can have a break and still keep up with my training.”
You rolled your eyes as he pushed off from the table. “That’s not what I meant, Lance. I practised with the new upgrades last week and it really changed the drivability. I was just making conversation.”
“Sure you were,” he huffed as he grabbed his bag from under the table and left.
Cleaning the napkin off your suit, you stood up and felt your stomach grumble at the smell coming from the kitchen. One more stop on the way to your room, you thought as you headed to the chefs.
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“You have hardly touched your food,” Charles said with a frown as he saw your plate still full while his and Lando’s were empty. “Do you not like it?”
You clutched your stomach and pushed the plate away. “I ate too much before we left, damn chef’s were making waffles in hospitality.”
Lando chuckled at your weakness but happily took your plate and stabbed his fork into the schnitzel. “So I guess you won’t want dessert then, pretty sure I saw stroopwafels on the menu.”
You perked up even with your stomach bloating and protesting the thought of any more food. “I might find room to fit one or two more.”
“I thought so,” he chuckled before reaching under the table for his bag and producing a gift box. “I know we said no presents but I’m terrible at listening and got one anyway.”
“Me too,” you said as you reached into your handbag.
Charles shook his head, and you almost believed he had followed the rule he had set, but his lips tipped up. “My present is already hanging in our bedroom for when you get home tomorrow.”
“Is it a nude?” Lando asked with a nod. “Please tell me it's nude. Blink twice if it’s a nude.”
“It’s not a nude, mon cher,” Charles clarified with a laugh.
“Dammit.” He sent Charles a smile to show he wasn’t actually as disappointed as he made it seem and Charles reached across the table to hold his hand. 
“Here, you two can open this,” you said as you slid the box towards their hands. “I’ve never had a first anniversary so I didn’t really know what to get but I saw this and thought it was kind of fitting…” You fell silent as Charles untied the bow and Lando lifted the lid. “But if you don’t like it I can get something else…”
Lando reached for one of the items first, lifting the chain up so he could see the pendant that hung on it, identical to the other two necklaces. Charles picked his one up next and examined the detail that had been masterfully engraved into the white gold. 
“It’s a trinity knot,” you said as you pulled a card out from under the last necklace, yours. “There’s a whole lot of symbolism in it like the past, present and future, but I like that it's just like us, you know, three connected. It’s stupid, isn’t it, I’ll take them back.” You felt like an idiot as you reached for them but they both pulled away before you could swipe it from their grasp.
“Hey, this is mine,” Lando huffed as he clutched it to his chest. “Get your own.”
“We love it,” Charles assured you as he took your hand and kissed your knuckles. “I think we were both stunned, in a good way, mon amour.”
“Not me, I just liked hearing her ramble,” Lando chuckled and you sent him a dirty look. “It’s adorable, love.”
“You suck,” you groaned as your cheeks heated.
“I do, asked Charles.”
“Will you help me put it on?” Charles asked as he held his up, ignoring Lando’s cheeky comment.
You rose from your seat and walked behind Charles, unclasping the necklace before draping it around his neck. The chains had been made longer since both of your boyfriends had thick necks from their training and when you let it go the trinity knot settled over the centre of his chest. Dipping your head down, you kissed him sweetly and whispered, “Happy anniversary, baby.”
While you were up, you took Lando’s and did the same before he grabbed the last necklace and patted his lap. You were grateful the restaurant had been hired out for the night so you could have the privacy to share the intimate moment as you sat down. His fingers were warm against your skin and you smiled as the cold chain balanced out the heat. It wasn’t enough to quell the fire that started when he kissed your nape where the clasp locked together.
“I love you,” he whispered as his hands started to drift up your thighs. “How about we skip dessert and head back to the hotel?”
“What about your gift?” Charles asked, rattling the box in his ear to try to guess what it was.
“Bring it,” Lando winked. “I’ll come in handy for what I have planned.”
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Round Fifteen - Monza GP
You had felt off since FP1. There wasn’t anything wrong, you just didn’t feel right. Your mother pressed the back of her hand to your forehead as you curled up on your couch and napped between the practices, but you didn’t have a fever.
“I’m just tired,” you mumbled as you pulled your cap down over your face to block out the lights. “I’ll be fine after a little sleep.”
She had disappeared after refilling your drink bottle and went to visit Charles since it was his team’s home race. He was feeling more nervous than usual with the added pressure of the tifosi out in force and he wanted to make them proud, make Ferrari proud. 
“Hey, love, wake up,” Lando coaxed you awake, a frown on his face at how long it had taken. You were like Charles, who, unless completely drunk, was a light sleeper. “It’s time for practice.”
“Shit,” you groaned as you saw the time, still a little lethargic and drowsy. “I haven’t even warmed up. Why didn’t anyone wake me earlier?”
“Kristian tried, but he came and found me. I think you would have killed him if he found an air horn to wake you. Are you feeling okay?”
You nodded as you sat up and stretched your back. Accepting his hands to pull you up, you used the momentum to crash into his chest and snake your arms around his waist. “I’m fine, but if you want to piggyback me so I can sleep on the walk then I will love you forever.”
“You are already going to love me forever,” he smirked confidently before it faded away and he pouted his lips, his brows softening above his smouldering eyes. “Could you ever hate this face?”
“I hate it when you do that,” you groaned as you felt your body awaking in response. “Goddammit, now I’m horny.”
“Good, at least that means you are wide awake now, come on, time to go.”
You would like to say the weekend improved after that but the car really struggled and you weren’t much better. You still bested Lance with your 9th place finish and another two points to the tally. It wasn’t much but it was enough to strain the already tense relationship with your teammate.
“I lost Charles,” you commented from your spot on Lando’s lap, having to talk right into his ear as the music was so loud. The nightclub was packed with Ferrari supporters and the two of you hidden in the VIP lounge were definitely the odd ones out. 
“He’s over there,” Lando pointed out, spotting the head of dark hair making his way through the crowd back to you.
A round of boo’s started to grow towards the entrance and it drowned out the music as Max walked into the club. Even from across the floor you could see Max roll his eyes at the sound he was growing used to, but you rose from your comfortable seat as it grated it on your nerves. Dressed in a white shirt and jeans, you were grateful your brother didn’t arrive in Red Bull merch and antagonise the crowd further. 
You shoved your way through the crowd and Charles changed his direction as he spotted you heading to the exit, intercepting you as you finally reached Max. “Shouldn’t you be celebrating your win?” you asked, elbowing a particularly annoying drunkard who was shouting at Max in Italian. 
“They aren’t the same without you there.” His eyes widened and he caught your shoulder, tugging you into his side as the crowd swelled closer, the anger growing by the second as Charles stood in front and Lando covered your back. You could hardly breathe as you were surrounded by the three of them and Charles shouted back in Italian, but they weren’t listening to the man they had idolised only minutes earlier.
“We should get out of here,” Lando shouted to the group, the charged atmosphere bringing security inside. You were escorted out of the club and Max was quiet as he slid into the back of the SUV with you while Charles rode shotgun beside Lando. Worried eyes searched for yours in the rearview but you were frowning at your brother. 
“Well, that was fun,” Charles broke the silence, twisting in his seat to look at Max too. “Are you alright?”
“I didn’t mean to spoil your evening,” he answered quietly, staring out at the street while Lando drove back to the hotel. 
“It’s fine, we were going to head back soon,” Charles said with a shrug. 
“I was getting tired anyway,” you added as you dropped your head on his shoulder and yawned. “I just want to have a break for a few days, but I can’t even have that.”
“Why not?” Max asked, since the next race was just under two weeks away in Singapore. Everyone was having a short break before the long cross-continental trip but given the wince he saw on Charles' face before he turned forwards in his seat, you weren’t one of them.
“Kristian,” you huffed resentfully.
“He still has you on that bullshit training programme? Tell him to fuck off.” Max shifted so your head could rest more comfortably. “Are you flying with me to Singapore?”
You shook your head and yawned again. “Charles has to fly with Vista for a promo.”
“And let me guess, you can’t really can’t go a few hours without him? What happened to bros before hoes.”
“Hey,” Charles feigned indignance and scowled at Max. “I can’t help it, I am so irresistible.”
Max gagged and reached for the car door. “Lando, let me out. I’ll see you at breakfast.”
Fortunately for him the hotel was in sight and Lando pulled into the turn, trying to park in the valet area while struggling with laughter. He hadn’t even put the SUV into park before Max’s door was opened and your pillow was gone with him. 
Your stomach rumbled as you headed into the quiet hotel and you blamed Max for mentioning food as you entered your suite. “Where’s the menu for room service?”
“I don’t think anything here is Kristian approved,” Lando commented as he read over the options but you pulled it from his grasp and reached for the phone. 
“Fuck Kristian and fuck his diet, I’m hungry.”
Lando held his hands up in surrender before walking off with a laugh to Charles. “And you say I have attitude.”
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Joel Miller x f!Reader The Last of Us 6.6k Words/ 3rd POV Feral Reader Masterlist Summary: She never paid attention to the newcomers when they joined Jackson until one of them begins to get close to Joel. Warning: Angst. Hurt/Comfort. Violence. Sexual Content. 18+ Minors DNI
She didn’t care when Jackson got new people. She wasn’t one of the regulars that crowded around the entrance, watching patrol bring them through, so similar to how they joined. No, she didn’t care because the rest of Jackson didn’t matter, just the two people she currently lived with. If it didn’t have to do with Joel and Ellie, she didn’t care. So it was at least a month before she met Harper, when she was added to their patrol duty. 
The other women in town, the ones that frequently fawned over Joel Miller, were different from his companion and she knew that. Her insecurity frequently reminded her that she didn’t belong in Jackson with these women that still took the time to dress up and do their hair. But she had seen Joel downright ignore their flirting enough times, had heard him reassure her that wasn’t the type he was interested in. Someone to watch his back. With teeth, he had said. Harper had teeth. She was a good shot, wasn’t afraid to get her hands dirty, and never complained about the work. She got along well with Maria, with everyone really, able to get them to talk about their interests and lives easily and seemed like an open book. Harper helped with the horses and in the food hall and knew how to cook and how to clean a rifle properly. And to her dismay, as she watched the patrol party enter the gates where she definitely wasn’t waiting for the man she lived with, Harper could make Joel smile. Not a smirk or a condescending tilt of the lips, but an actual smile. She watched them dismount from the horses and the woman laughed at something Joel said, his lips curving into a grin, and her heart dropped in her stomach. Because she wasn’t sure the man had ever smiled like that around her. Easy and charming, relaxed. Suddenly she was the old version of herself, anxious and unsure, insecure in her own skin and embarrassed. All her faults and problems blared in her head alongside the echo of the threat hanging over her head. Assimilate or get kicked out of Jackson. She was on her last strike after three rough months of living there while this woman had shown up and fit in better than she ever could after only a month. Her nails dug into her thigh sharply, the small hints of pain trying to keep her grounded. She’d almost convinced herself to turn around and walk home, leave before Joel could see her standing there with all her defects, but then his eyes met hers. And if she didn’t feel awful enough, his smile dimmed a bit, became unsure and almost bashful. Like he didn’t want her to see it. She wondered if Harper had noticed his eyes were more hazel than brown when he was in a good mood. They both walked over to her and she stood there, stiff and stabbing into her own skin, wanting to bolt. Harper turned to her, light hair catching the sun and blue eyes glistening. Perfect and still pretty even after the world went to shit while she was very aware she hadn’t brushed her hair in three days. “Oh hi, I don’t think we’ve officially met,” she smiled sweetly, adjusting the rifle on her back and the bandana around her neck. Joel cleared his throat, nodding towards her and ignoring the furrowed brow that was permanently on her face around strangers, “Harper, this is Red. Red, Harper.” “I’ve heard so much about you. Red’s such an interesting name,” she smiled with a light chuckle though it wasn’t as wide as the one that had been aimed at Joel, her eyes roaming over her. Taking her measure. She only frowned and ignored her eye contact, staring at Joel’s shoulder instead. “It’s not my name,” the words were quiet but raspy, a growl. Harper’s smile tightened in the corner of her eye. The silence weighed between them, stifling, and Joel cleared his throat, “Harper happens to be from Austin. We frequented some of the same spots surprisingly.” The words were almost an explanation or an apology, or an excuse. She didn’t reply, eyes still solely focused on his shoulder and avoiding looking at either of them. Small talk was hard on most occasions but this seemed impossible. She wasn’t sure how she should reply to that. Congrats? Good job finding another person you could easily talk to besides me? She chewed the inside of her lip, feeling uncomfortable and desperately wanting to run, words stuck until she nodded and spit out, “I’ll see you at the house later.” His brow had furrowed when she swiveled on her heel and started walking down the street, rigid and feeling the small welts of blood seeping into her jeans from her nails. ___________________ It wasn’t long before she started seeing Harper everywhere and she grit her teeth every time. 
When she walked into the bar, the location on her list of places to search for Ellie, she found Joel and Tommy chatting with the woman at the bar top. She was talking rapidly, a smile on her face and hands waving as she told some story. A hand talker. Tommy was behind the bar, leaning on it and seeming enraptured by the conversation while Joel was standing with his elbow resting on the counter, body fully turned to face Harper. All three chuckled at something and she watched as her hand landed on Joel’s arm, staying there a few seconds too long before sliding off. Too lingering to be innocent. She wanted to snap her teeth at her, go up to them and put her hand on his back or in his belt loops, a move he’d done so often to her. Push him against the countertop and take his mouth with hers or even straight grab Harper’s perfect hair and slam her face against the table. A million images flashed through her head only to come to a halt at remembering her predicament. Joel’s urges to try to join the community or risk getting kicked out. She knew she was a fine thread away from getting booted. One wrong step out the door and probably bashing in perfect new girl Harper’s face would do the trick faster than she could blink. So instead she pivoted, snarl in her throat, and walked out the bar. Harper became a regular on Joel’s shift. She only worked with the newcomer a couple times. She was good and that irritated her. The woman was a survivor and knew how to handle herself and watch out for others. All the things she usually found lacking in the townspeople and hated, Harper had that and more. She didn’t know what to do with that knowledge and the growing list of the woman’s skills. They’d been scouting out a small location, a couple of cabins a few hours away from Jackson. She’d rode to the far side of them and gotten off, checking the houses for anyone hiding out or seeing if there was anything good to scavenge. When she heard the sound of glass shattering and heavy thumps a few houses down, voices crying out, her heart almost pounded out of her chest. That’s where Joel had been checking. She’d ran fast, bow out, feet carrying her quicker than she’d ever run before on the muddy Spring ground. Previous moments flashed in her mind. Too many close calls. Joel’s blood on her hands from a stab wound. Joel hurt. But the action was already over as she barreled into the room. A Clicker lay bleeding out on the floor, a large hatchet stuck in the fungi petals of its face, mouth in a grotesque scream. Joel was panting on the floor with his back against the corner, pistol in hand unfired, while Harper stood over the infected triumphant. With a grin, she ripped the hatchet from its head and walked over to Joel, offering him a hand. She felt useless. Harper had his back. Teeth. _____________________________ Tommy had finally found her a job she was actually fairly decent at, after being taken off both kitchen and farming duty, but noticing she seemed calmest with animals. People didn’t want to work with her and in her mind that was fine, but in Maria’s it made her a problem. But she liked the dog kennels. They weren’t unlike her. She could understand their wants and needs, their habits and what they deemed their territory. Training them wasn’t easy but it was rewarding and it came with the added benefit that she was around the animals more often than people. She didn’t have to be talkative or put on a mask. They knew hand signs, could read her feelings and what she wanted. It felt comfortable to be with them. Often in the morning she would go and feed the dogs, go over their exercises, walk them in the outside yard they had set aside behind the kennels. Ellie had fallen in love with them as well and sometimes would tag along, was even there when one of the dogs gave birth. She’d been grossed out initially but once the blood and the goo and all the disgusting parts of birth was over and done with she held the small puppies in her hands and helped them find spots to feed. Joel had come a few times, watched them with arms resting on the pen door as they sat in the hay and held the tiny jelly bean puppies. Ellie had grinned, taking over naming duty, and had even held one up forcing Joel to name one. He’d frowned, shrugging at the little brown squirming blob, scratching at his beard, “I don’t know, Brownie?” “Really?” Ellie scoffed, rolling her eyes, “So original. Naming it after its color.” “You named me after my shirt,” she chuckled, raising an eyebrow at the teenager. Those first few days when she hadn’t known how to interact but knew she had to make sure the girl was safe. Unwilling to give any piece of herself, especially her name. So Ellie had formed a piece from the rubble and taken it for herself. Ellie huffed with a sniff, nose turning up, and ignored the dig, “Whatever, Red suited you.” She held the squirming puppies in her lap, watching them seek warmth while holding a small container of sugared ice for the mama to lick and enjoy after pushing out ten little bodies, “Good thing I wasn’t wearing a different colored shirt.” Joel’s eyes were on her and she looked up at him, finding him watching her with the slightest tilt of his lips. She knew he was worried about her, had already been fighting tooth and nail with his brother and his pregnant wife over her position. He was working harder to help her than Ellie who had adjusted quickly. This was the one job inside of Jackson’s walls she was relaxed in and she could feel him taking in the way she seemed at ease. The smile grew, warming. “Did Maggie have the pups?” a familiar voice rang out. The smile vanished and she stiffened.
The kennels had been converted from one of the old stables, the dogs held in old horse stalls on either side of the room. She couldn’t see the woman from her position on the floor, the walls of the stall blocking the view, but she knew it was Harper that had walked in. She came up to Joel’s side, almost touching shoulders, and looked down at her and Ellie with the pups and Maggie. “Oh, hi Red,” Harper’s smile became a bit tighter, head tilting, “I didn’t realize you were the one taking care of her.” She didn’t answer, averting her gaze to Maggie and adjusting the bowl for her to lick. Ellie answered instead, enthusiastically holding the puppy up in her hand, “She takes care of the dogs now! Joel named this one.” The man frowned almost bashfully, shrugging, “It’s Brownie.” Harper laughed and her dimples showed, head quirking as she looked at him, “That’s adorable.” She couldn’t get up and leave with the puppies all around her and both Joel and Harper leaning on the pen door. She was trapped, listening to them chat and laugh and Ellie showing off all the dogs while she sat there and tried to be invisible. She wanted to scream, rage, do something other than be meek and small. It was like every time the woman showed up, the version of her from two decades before took over her skin. The girl who had been shy and timid and didn’t know how to fight back. She wanted to scream at her to do something, say something, snarl at Harper that if she touched Joel one more fucking time she’d break her wrist and shove it down her throat. Instead, she sat there, listening to Ellie talk to her easily and Joel’s soft musings, the three of them getting along better than she ever did. Try. Try. Joel’s pleas haunted her constantly. She was trying. God, was she fucking trying so hard. But this wasn’t an instance like with Grant who had touched her and paid the price or his fucking brother who had sneered in her face and called her a bitch. She could argue those were justified. She could have done worse to them and didn’t. But the problem was Harper hadn’t done anything wrong to her. She hadn’t been mean, she hadn’t touched her, hadn’t done anything but make her feel small in comparison to her presence. There was no reason to fight her, to twist her pretty locks in her fingers and smash her face in until the strands turned red and she was nothing but a cavernous hole. She hated settlement life. She hated the fucking politics of it all, the dance to be respectable. Before, there was no time to worry about feelings or what her and Joel were, how he felt towards her, what her role was in their complicated mess of a relationship. It had moved beyond just sex, but she wasn’t sure what exactly. They’d gone through hell together. Maybe it was that she happened to be there, a place holder to fulfill all he needed while taking care of Ellie, but now he had options. There were other women that could fill that place. Could be a better guardian to Ellie, could take care of Joel, could watch both of their backs. One that didn’t cause problems or that he had to jump to defend or cause Ellie to yell at gawking strangers on her behalf. She tried not to focus on it. Swallowed it down deep in the pit of her stomach and refocused back on the things that mattered, which were caring for Joel and Ellie. 
She tried not to think about it when later that evening when they’d gone to bed he pulled her into his body, hands roaming over her soft belly before gripping her tightly and pushing his hard length against her backside. She tried not to think when his fingers slipped inside of her, pumping in and out as his other hand squeezed her tit and pinched her nipped. Tried not to think if he was pushing into her from behind because he was imagining someone else’s face. The confusion turned to a twisted sort of pain and hurt and rage that needed an outlet. Defiance against her situation. She couldn’t do anything outside the walls of their house and her frustration was tearing her up. She was a fox with its foot caught in a trap, snapping and snarling at whatever she could but unable to do anything. She pulled away, feeling him slip out of her, and shoved him onto his back. Joel let out a small grunt at the hard push, but she didn’t care as she climbed on top of him, watching the small bit of confusion in his eyes. He knew something was off, but didn’t stop her. Let her take what she needed. She had to feel some ounce of control. So she rode him hard, nothing gentle to the way she rose and fell on him, sweat coating her skin and panting. There was no rhythm to it, only primal need and hurt carrying her movements. He sat up, brows furrowed and not keen on the distance of laying back, the angle changing enough she groaned. His hand caressed her neck softly in contrast to her harsh movements and the small tattooed stars on her collarbone he was always infatuated with. Almost as if he was trying to bring that version of her back to herself. But she didn’t want that. She didn’t want to give him an ounce of control over her, show him he could affect her at all. Because that meant someone else had the power to hurt her. Twisting her fingers in his curls tightly, she crushed her lips to his to avoid his searching eyes, swallowing every sound he made from the pleasure of their jutting hips. Her nails scraped along his scalp and into his shoulder hard enough she knew there would be red lines in the morning. He was letting himself be distracted, giving in, snapping his hips into hers equally rough with arms a tight band around her middle and holding her to his chest. They were wrapped around each other. For once there wasn’t the coaxing sound of his urgings as he drew her moans from her usually quiet throat, his praise at how good she was for him and how she felt. He was silent in the face of her aggression and she wasn’t sure how to feel, trying desperately to chase that control and release of her emotions. Her lips left his swollen and bruised and she pressed open mouth kisses onto the hard muscle of his shoulder as the pace became a mess. It wasn’t about her orgasm at that moment. She wanted to make him come, drag it from him like a trophy. Show him exactly what she could do to him. And when he did find his release, the hot spend of his arousal filling her, she bit down hard into the skin of his neck making him groan harder and dig his fingers into her skin. He tasted like sweat and salt and the earthy air from working outside. She didn’t come, didn’t mention it or even want it, only held him tightly as he came down from the high and slid his hand over her naked back. His grip was a little harder and she kept her face tucked into his neck when he tried to meet her eyes. They went to bed without any discussion, him holding her to his chest while her eyes stared into the darkness longer, listening to his breaths. The sound of knocking in the early morning woke them up. She heard Joel curse and throw on pants and a flannel, not bothering to button it up before lumbering down the stairs. Sleep beckoned to pull her back under, breasts pressed into the cool sheets and covers slid down from Joel leaving. It was usually Tommy, up early and taking care of things or letting him know of any problems. But she paused at the distinctly female voice she heard. A few minutes later Joel came back into the room and began to dress fully. She bit her lip, watching him from where her face was shoved into the pillow, brows furrowed. Boots, jacket, holster, gun. Everything signs he was leaving the walls. He looked at her after snapping in his gun and paused when he noticed she was awake and staring, two large unblinking eyes watching him from behind her arms. Joel hesitated in the darkness, contemplating, almost guilty. It was supposed to be his day off. Yet here he was, racing off. “Harper said one of the guys is sick and they’re short one so I’m gonna go help out with morning patrol,” he explained and nodded to himself, thumbs in his belt. A reasonable excuse. She wondered if he hadn’t noticed she was awake would he have left without telling her? But still, she said nothing and tucked her face back into the pillow, exhausted and a little sad and drowning in her own deteriorating self-esteem and doubt. A few moments later, she ignored the trail of his fingers on her naked back, soft and apologetic, before he left the room. Most of the time it was Tommy asking him to fill in. He didn’t say yes often and would tell him to shove it before going back to their bed. But Harper had asked this time and she felt her hackles raise at the fact she’d come to their house. To ask him specifically. And he’s been quick to say yes. 
These feelings weren’t something she knew how to process or handle. Who the fuck handled being jealous of all things in the apocalypse? It was ridiculous, but settling in Jackson had allowed those things to creep in. She became aware of all she lacked and all she couldn’t handle and how other people didn’t have the same issues as her. She let her instincts guide her. The kennels became her home. She knew when Joel was home and avoided him, knowing that if she didn’t see him with Harper then it wouldn’t hurt as much versus death by a thousand cuts. She knew better than to try and sleep in the downstairs room, he’d only find her and yell at her to go upstairs, so she went to bed early or late. Asleep before he would show up or waiting until he was sleeping himself. Ellie followed her around when she wasn’t going to classes or helping out where she could. The girl never asked directly what was wrong, but she knew something was up. There was worry in her eyes and she would ask for help with inane tasks, trying to lure her home like luring a frightened dog home with a treat. She didn’t want to worry or hurt her, but the feelings were choking her and she didn’t know how to cope. Some nights, she missed her sister and having someone to walk her through it all. Annie had been so much smarter than her despite her young age. She understood the world better, was sassy like Ellie, and could read people so well. Unlike her who was gullible back then and immensely naive, unsure and anxious constantly. Book smart, but not much else. But Annie was gone along with that version of her. 
Sometimes she’d feel Joel inching closer to her in the bed, hands ghosting over her shoulder or brushing through her hair when he thought she was asleep. His lips brushing her skin. Never pushing, far too patient. 
When he left for morning patrol, she pretended to stay asleep. Harper would be in his group and when that happened, she liked to wait outside the house for him. The kennels welcomed her and she spent time with each dog, shoving her face into their necks and running her hands over their fluffy coats. She checked on the puppies and weighed them all, walking Maggie so she could get a break from the squirming things. She even spent time with the older dogs, taken off duty, making sure they got attention and massaged their joints and hugged them in her lap. Her brain made backup plans. If Joel asked her to leave the house, she could set up a cot in the kennels and stay there. There was even a small converted garage she could live in if she needed to. If they asked her to leave, she could go north and stay within distance enough she could visit Ellie often enough. Maybe set up a radio code similar to what Joel had told her about their friends Bill and Frank so she could set meet up spots. The latter was more likely. People only put up with her because of Joel and if he chose Harper then there wasn’t any reason to keep her in Jackson to them. Ellie would have guardians, she wasn’t necessary.
Hours passed while she cared for the dogs. She skipped breakfast and lunch, choosing instead to spend time training them or napping with the senior dogs in their pens.
It was mid-day when the doors opened and she heard footsteps enter. They weren’t familiar and her body stiffened instantly, shutting the pen door behind her as she exited Maggie’s enclosure. Sometimes it was one of the patrols, coming to switch out the dogs, but they didn’t always take them out unless someone was spotted and none had been taken that day. Her heart thudded even louder when she saw who it was, Harper’s smile a little too tight as she made eye contact. In all the times since the newcomer had joined Jackson, she’d never been alone with the woman. Now she didn’t like the lack of a buffer, the way her focus took in every inch of her. But in the same way, the cracks in her mask were showing. What had seemed gentle in the lines of her face were now condescending, mocking, ingenuine. Her lips were stretched thin in almost a sneer and those blue eyes were hard. Oh. She could see the game then, the cunning analyzing way this woman looked at her. She was right. Harper was a survivor, was so very smart, and was also willing to do whatever to get her way. You don’t survive this long by being sweet and kind and caring. You had to be ugly sometimes, but Harper had gotten good at hiding that ugliness from the right people. There was no reason to hide it from her though. 
The woman stepped further in and walked towards her languidly, trailing her hands along the stable doors. Her exit was cut off, having to move around the woman to leave, and she began to see the situation for what it was. A standoff. A fight. Her teeth were grinding, nails sinking into her palm if only to inflict some kind of violence to keep herself in check. 
Harper smiled, faux kindness painted on her lips, “They told me about you, warned me to be careful around you, and all the problems you’ve been having. They told me how you’re on your last leg here.” She paused and the smile widened, “You should just go and save everyone the trouble. Ellie’s doing great here and from what Joel has told me, he’s enjoying having his brother back and this new settlement life. If you really care about them, you’d realize you’re holding them back.”
Her blood was boiling, rage roaring through her head at Harper’s gall to mention her people, and she growled, “And you’re so worried about them, right? Concerned citizen?”
“Joel has been through a lot,” Harper spat out and she wanted to snap her teeth as if she didn’t fucking know, “He shouldn’t have to worry about some woman messing things up and getting them kicked out.” Some woman, as if that was all she was. The words were spit out of her mouth like they were covered in grime and blood. She didn’t even bother to hide what she meant. The words were all there, the implication that the man had opened up to her, told her about his life and what they’d been through, and his feelings regarding this new chapter. Things he hadn’t told her yet, too busy trying to douse fires and help her get settled. 
Cleaning up her messes.
With a clenched jaw, holding in the hurt and the anger to keep from showing the damage, she bent down and grabbed her bag to try and leave. There was no winning in this sense because she was right and she’d never been good with words. Better to get out of there, go somewhere else before the damage took hold and would start to fester, “Your concern is noted.” Moving to go around her and leave, Harper stepped in her path, shoulders straight and spine rigid with her chest puffed out, “It’s not just for them. This is a civilized place.” And you’re not that went unsaid, “Why don’t you do everyone a favor and go? They’ll be fine and happy. No one has to worry if you’re gonna freak out and kill someone and you can finally roam the forests and be back home.”
She was so close she could smell the trees and wind on her, the slight hint of sweat from the horse. Too close. Close enough she could wrap her teeth into her flesh and bite and rip. Too tempting.
“Or you can get the fuck out of my face?” she hissed with her teeth bared. It was all rising, the urge to hurt her. She’d hurt so many people for less and it would feel so good to break her knuckles open on her mouth, to hear the cartilage in her nose crack. But her smile turned smug and she only pressed in, almost chest to chest, and using her few inches of height to look down at her, “Or what? What can you do? They’ll kick you out and do you really think Joel would be on your side if you hurt me?” That made her hesitate. Because she wasn’t sure. With the other women, the men and their obvious disdain for her, yes he would defend her. But this new person who was like a merging of all he liked? Tough but good with people and pretty and able to hold her own, someone he trusted at his back. Would he defend her? Harper sensed that hesitation and, before she could blink, took advantage and shoved her back. She stumbled, losing ground, so aware she was trapped. The fox with its leg in a noose, all over again. Fighting would give her exactly what she wanted. Not fighting back made her weak, someone to trample on. Someone too weak to live. 
“Come on. Settlement life make you lose your bite or are the rumors hot air?” Harper hissed and shoved her again. Her instincts were screaming to fight, to shove her back, grab her knife, or use her fists. Beat her teeth in and make her swallow each one to the point she could only eat soup until she choked on it. But that hanging threat was there like a guillotine, Tommy’s voice saying Maria was considering kicking her out.
Joel asking her to try.
So she did nothing. She clenched her fists and bit her tongue until blood coated it. And when Harper threw a punch, snapping her head to the side, she still did nothing. 
Shame and anger and resentment bloomed in her chest and the small taste of blood grew until she could feel a steady trickle down her throat as her nose took the brunt of the damage. She’d killed so many people for simply touching something of hers, looking at her, had done awful things to protect herself and her two people, and yet she would take this if it meant keeping them safe and happy. But it felt so much like losing to just let it happen.
“Can’t do anything, can you?” Harper chuckled, “They don’t need you, ya know that? You’re baggage. Joel and Ellie’s lives would be so much easier without you dragging them down-” “The fuck you just say to her?” The moment the deep voice snarled through the kennel, she saw Harper freeze. It came from the open doorway and she watched as the sneer on her face morphed into surprise and then tried to turn soft, apologetic. Fake. They both turned and watched as Joel entered the kennel, lips twisted into a hard frown and brow shading his eyes. He was looking at the woman differently now. Like an outsider or a threat. She could see the subtle fear and discomfort swim to the surface under that gaze. The game was up. Mask invisible. “Joel-” “Not another word. You shut your fucking mouth,” he snarled and Harper shrunk in response. She watched it all with a disconnect, feeling the blood slide down her lips and into her mouth. There was no relief at his appearance. Shame was still a heavy blanket on her shoulders at him finding her cowed.
With a gulp, Harper’s gaze swung between the two and she slid away, scurrying around him and towards the exit. But not before he called out, “If you say a goddamn word to her ever again, I’ll let her finish what you started and swear before the whole town that you deserved every bit of what she does to you. I’ll make sure she doesn’t get punished for a single fucking thing.” The threat was there but not from him. No, even catching them with her own blood smeared across her face, he knew she could do the damage herself unrestrained and untethered. That this moment was a special circumstance because what she could do was far worse than what he would. Harper ran and didn’t look back. Silence took over between them, tension thick enough the dogs whined and pawed at their pen doors. She stood stiff and unmoving, eyes not meeting his but looking off into the darkness. He was the first to break the silence. “Why didn’t you fight back?” Joel asked, a growl still in his voice but not towards her. She smiled humorlessly, hands on her hips and staring down at the door floor. Her blood was speckled on the ground, “Because I’m trying.”
Joel scoffed and stepped more into the room, grabbing her chin until she looked up at him. From his back pocket, he pulled out a rag and gently began to wipe the blood from her face, “Trying to do what? Be a punching bag?” Blood was in her throat when she swallowed, heart beating a little louder at his touch, but she continued to avoid his gaze, “Integrate.” He paused at the word, his thumb rubbing the edge of her jaw compulsively. Then his grip tightened and he turned her forcefully to meet his gaze. Joel’s eyes were hard and lips pressed thin with anger but also regret and frustration, “I don’t give a shit if we’re integrating or whatever. Someone gives you shit, lays a hand on you, fuck even makes you feel like you don’t belong with us then you knock their fucking teeth in.” She swallowed as he all but snarled the words at her, his fingers so tight on her skin, but he continued, “Settling down here doesn’t mean I want you to become a doormat and I’ll argue with Maria until I’m fucking blue over that. They start shit? Then you sure as fuck finish it.” Her teeth clenched and she felt the sharp coppery tang of the blood still in her mouth, “They’ll kick me out-” “No, they won’t,” he hissed angrily, “I fucking mean it, Red. I don’t want you softening for our sake if it means people try to make you feel like shit. Your place is here with us. No one is going to get between us, I can assure you that.” “She wasn’t wrong,” she replied softly as if saying it out loud was exposing an open nerve, exposing her insecurity to him, “I’m baggage. She could take care of herself and you and Ellie. She can cook and watch your back and gets along with people. I can’t do that-” “Stop,” he ground out, “I’m not that easy. Jesus, I’m not going to chase after the first woman that can hold a gun and make me a fucking pie.” Despite his hard words, he still gently wiped her face clean, taking such care in checking her over and making sure she was okay. It was almost too much, “Give yourself some credit, Starshine-” “You spent a lot of time with her,” the words were like ripping open her skin, bitter and stupid and raw as they spilled out of the wound, “She’s…from Austin and…you laughed and smiled with her. You just seemed happier around her.” Joel paused and pulled back a little to fully take in her expression and what was at play. She could see the moment he saw her, really saw her no matter how hard she was trying to hide her feelings. The insecurity. The jealousy. Everything she had struggled with. He chewed his lip and nodded, brow furrowing a bit harder, “I’m sorry I didn’t realize what she wanted or how she was making you feel. But you’re fucking stupid if you think I wouldn’t turn her ass down in a second.” The words weren’t gentle or soft, but they were said as a fact. The simplest fact that Joel would never choose Harper. That he wasn’t actively pursuing that. And it worked. She felt the tightness in her shoulders ease a bit as he pulled her forward into his embrace, pressing a kiss against her forehead. Her fingers dug into his back, gripping the worn denim fabric of his shirt tightly and she couldn’t help but sigh into his embrace. Home. It felt like home and comfort and everything she had felt she was missing. Breathing him in, she mumbled against his chest, “She’s probably going to complain next time you have patrol with her.” “She’s not going to be on patrol with me,” he murmured into her ear, pulling back to sweep her messy hair behind her ears, “I’m gonna make sure she works exactly where she belongs. On shit duty.” “You don’t have to. You don’t have to come to my rescue,” she argued albeit weakly. “Oh I’m not,” Joel chuckled, lips turning up into a smirk, “This is all for me. No one insults what’s mine.” She looked at him, brow furrowed at the words, mind trying to process them. But she didn’t get very far before his lips were on hers, kissing her hard and tugging her back flush against his body so she could feel exactly how much he wanted her. Her nails dug into his skin, teeth tugging on his bottom lip, while his hands kneaded the soft curves of her ass, pressing the hard front of his jeans into her stomach. He groaned into her mouth and pulled away enough to speak against her lips, grip on her still tight, “Let’s get back home so I can fuck you so hard you’ll stop doubting yourself.” She chuckled, wanting to argue that that was a hard promise to keep, but he was already dragging her out of the kennels and into the darkening streets as the sun began to lower. True to his word, Harper found herself with a brand new post going forward. Tommy didn’t mention the reason why to her, didn’t pull her aside and question her over what happened. Ellie didn’t even mention her bruised nose. Whatever Joel had told them was enough. The woman went out of her way to avoid going anywhere near any of them going forward, even straight turning in the opposite direction when she saw them and eventually coming off patrol duty all together. She tried not to feel satisfied at that. Tried not to feel more at ease or proud of herself when Maria told her she was doing a damn good job with the kennels and asked if she wanted to take on more duties, almost cementing that she wasn’t going to be asked to leave. Joel and Ellie did that for her, celebrating every small win and reminding her exactly where she belonged. With them.  _________________________________________ Taglist:  @alouise20 @faceache111​​ @hawsx3​​ @taxidriversainz @iluvbunnyhops @mrfitzdarcyslover​ @emlovesya  @agent007knight​ @spaacerabbit​ @namgification @wonwoosthetic​  @wxnderingthoughts @sagggy @escaping-reality8
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