#the content i give honestly deserves awards tbh

[dancingwiththeplanets]

An Angel Amongst Demons - chapter two

Boba Fett x fem!reader

     chapter 1 / masterlist

Summary:  A few days after the incident in the throne room, Boba hovers around you like a shadow worried you’ll leave him. You try to reassure him through small, intimate moments with him that there’s no place you’d rather be.

A/N:  Really trying to expand on the idea that a gorgeous palace lays hidden underground/ behind the throne room! Also, I think we can all start calling this Boba’s Palace now, jabba is gone. Sorry for the low quality edit it’s my first one haha

Warnings: dancing!boba, protective!boba, suggestive content, plain old day at the palace, soft!boba, not a lot of content tbh but cute moments and we get to know our OC Mandos Raul and Enzo, I didn’t plan this out, im sorry

Word Count: 4.5k+

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The ballroom, though practically useless in its existence and never actually having served its purpose, has recently become one of your favorite rooms in the palace. Initially, you didn’t know what to do with the space. It’s not like Boba seized at the idea of throwing a ball and inviting a group of strangers into the palace, providing anyone the opportunity to discover the secrets hidden behind the throne room. Let alone risk letting an adversary sneak their way in and stirring up trouble.

Nonetheless, you’ve taken it upon yourself to spruce the place up. It is, after all, one of the grander rooms in the castle, with paintings coating the ceiling and the walls bordered with columns.

It’s actually extremely beautiful, you’ve decided, wiping your forehead against your light-blue sleeve, frowning when it comes back brown from the dust that’s stuck to your face. It seemed like a sensible thing to wear this morning. A loose fitting blue blouse with flowy pants to match, secured in the middle by a slightly darker sash. Your pant legs were tucked into your boots so as not to get in the way. It was one of the more cozy and plain things you owned, though not poor in quality by any standards. The fabric was refined, flowy and soft against your skin. Quite honestly, even in your working clothes, you looked nicer than you felt you deserved to. But far be it for Boba to allow his princess to wander around in anything but the best.

The week you’d moved in was a busy one, filled with surprises and adjustments that were quite honestly overwhelming. You arrived at Boba’s palace with a literal sack over your shoulder, enough to stash your small wardrobe of two garments and a few trinkets of personal value. Tatooine was a simple place, you only owned what you absolutely needed. And you, being a young and simple waitress at the local cantina, could barely make enough to cover your cost of living. You were never awarded the luxury of having needless objects.

The first few days of your arrival, Boba had stuck to your side like glue, making sure you got around okay and had everything you needed. Initially, he’d even had a seperate room made up for you to stay in. It was absolutely beautiful, by far the lightest room in the entire palace, though lacking in a window. It was one of the biggest, not as impressive as his own chambers, but still spacious. He decorated the room with paintings and furniture and accented the space with hues of blue and gold. Unfortunately, the pretty room barely got any good use out of it.

Boba escorted you to your quarters on your first night, cradling your chin and kissing your forehead at the door, bidding you goodnight. He reminded you where you could find something to sleep in, having delighted himself in surprising you with an entirely new wardrobe.

You pulled on a satin, lavender slip, admiring the foreign material for a long while as it weighed so delicately on your form. You took your time readying yourself for bed before crawling in and feeling engulfed by pillows. Once you settled, left alone to your anxious thoughts and feelings, you suddenly felt overwhelmed by the exquisite room embracing you. A flutter of giddiness and exhilaration filled you, your mind and body enraptured by the day's events. You felt absolutely spoiled.

Feeling bold on an entirely unnatural level, you slipped away from the warm, velvety comforter and tiptoed to the door. With a rush of courage, your hand met the handle and you stepped out, bare feet cold against the tile floor. You peeked around before quickly darting down the hall, forever grateful that not a soul was around to see your practically naked form running by, before ascending the stairs that led to Boba’s door.

You lifted your hand, your knuckle knocking gently three times against the rough surface.

You heard Boba shifting on the other side of the door, tugging down on your nightgown that just barely cleared your thighs. The hinges of the door creaked as they turned, opening slowly to reveal a very smug looking Boba in just his underclothes.

He hummed, eyes tracing over your form with a shake of his head. “Wandering the halls looking like that.” He chided, gently grabbing you by the waist and pulling you through the door, “That’ll get you into trouble, little one.”

-----------------------------

You smile as you recall the memory. Suffice to say, you didn’t end up sleeping in your own quarters that night, or any night after that, for that matter. Though Boba’s honorable gesture in providing you with your own space was not lost on you.

Continuing on with your endeavors, you move to stand from your crouch on the ground, simultaneously trying to tighten the blue sash wrapped around your middle. You gasp as you run into a hard surface, exhaling in relief as Boba braces you in front of him.

Mumbling an apology, you watch as his helmeted face looks you up and down, steady hands holding you out from him.

“What?” You ask, a smile making its way to your cheeks.

“Your outfit, it...looks like something I wore as I boy.” He says adoringly, now fondling the blue sash at your hips.

You glance down again at your form, a matching blue blouse and trousers tucked into simple black boots. “I...look like you as a young boy?” You counter, earning a deep chuckle from your lover.

“Well I looked rather plain in it,” He says, “I don’t think I looked half as radiant as you do.”

“So you do like it?” You ask.

“Of course I like it,” He grins, “I bought it.”

You shake your head as you carry on with your tasks, allowing Boba to shadow your movements for a while before leaving you again to carry on with his own agenda.

You spend the next few hours actively scrubbing away at the room, feeling especially motivated to complete it, not like all the other half-finished rooms scattered about the palace, which is partly your fault. But the ballroom felt different, once you dusted away all the grime and filth and replaced the lighting in the ceilings to give the room more life, it really started to come together. Unfortunately, your previously clean clothes and skin were paying the price for the hard work being done, you definitely looked a little worse for wear. Wisps of hair beginning to tickle your cheeks from where they’d fallen loose from your braid.

Currently, you were taking extra care to polish a beautiful mosaic decorating the inside of an archway. Thousands of small, colorful shards lined neatly together to form the image of a bold Tatooine sunset. One of the few grand beauties your home planet was known for. A surprisingly lovely work of art left behind, albeit not properly cared for, by the previous inhabitants of the palace.

You admire the artwork for a while after polishing it to near perfection, letting your bum fall to the floor and legs splay out comfortably in front of you. Your wrists support your upper body, arms holding you up as you lean back onto them, head tilting lazily to one side.

You find yourself distracted from your glossed over gaze by Boba, who seems to have wandered his way in here for the third time today. Enzo tails him a few paces behind, but stops to stand guard idly by the door. You can’t imagine he or Raul feel as though they serve any real purpose wandering these empty halls, probably much preferring when they get to patrol the throne room or secure the perimeter.  

Boba approaches you, pausing over your fatigued form and huffing out a laugh when you don’t move to stand, instead opting to gaze up at him with tired, doe eyes. He holds a hand out to you and you groan, placing your palm in his as he hoists you up.

“The room looks lovely.” He says, voice raspy through the modulator as he looks around.

The praise makes you smile. “Come see what I found,” You say, leading him by the hand. You open a large dresser to the right, stuffed full of old vinyls and a polished record player sitting proudly atop. You carefully choose a record, placing it beneath the needle and starting the track, allowing it to play soothingly in the background as you guide him around the rest of the room.

He follows you around, listening to you babble about the lovely art on the ceiling and how nice the light looks coming through the one, boxy window at the top. He watches the childlike sparkle and admiration in your eyes as you point out different things you’ve noticed, the excitement trickling out in your tone.

His mind contemplates how different this life is from the one you used to have. You went from a one room, compact home, just barely big enough for your small bed, to a palace filled with grand staircases, hallways and countless bedrooms, a blissful dream in your eyes. Nevermind the fact that you were still stuck on Tatooine. In fact, you seemed happy to stay, oddly attached to the sandy planet, something Boba found amusing.

A couple trips around the room later, and a few songs having gone by, the two of you now stand in the center of the empty room. Him, groaning in protest, and you, placing his hand on your waist yet again. You’ve spent the last few minutes trying to teach him a basic waltz, something your father had taught you when you were little. A rare memory you shared with him before he...well-  

“Boba,” You scold with a giggle, “Try again.” Your request earns you another frustrated grumble from your partner. At some point you were able to coerce him into dancing with you, having pleaded desperately when your favorite classic came on. “C’mon, you nearly had it that time!”

He sighs loudly, tilting his helmet in an exasperated fashion. “Last time,” He says with finality, his finger raised in your direction.

You nod your head, an amused grin spread wide on your face.

He holds tight to your waist and reaches for your other hand, a final effort to humor you.

“And...1, 2, 3...1, 2, 3..” You begin moving again to the music, trying to swallow the snicker working its way up at the image of your armored partner staring at your feet for guidance. Visor following your every move, looking unsure and sloppy and quite honestly graceless.

You jump at the voice of a forgotten presence in the room.

“No! No, no, no, boss.” Enzo finally pipes up, his silent and judgemental self unable to be contained any longer. He moves forward with a swagger in his step as he struts towards you from his previous position against the wall, “You’ve gotta lead her by the waist,” He says pointedly, reaching for you “Observe-”

Boba’s arm shoots out, blocking Enzo by the pauldron, “You touch her, you're a dead man.” He growls, deflecting his attempt to take you by the waist.

You jerk slightly at the interaction, rolling your eyes and waiting for the show of dominance to subside.

Enzo’s hands raise in surrender, bowing away respectfully before returning to his earlier stance, no doubt a grin slapped on beneath his visor.

Boba’s hand returns to your waist with a shake of his head, noting your half-suppressed chuckle, evidently amused by the encounter.  

“Alright,” He grunts, “once more.”

You start counting aloud, moving at a pace Boba can keep up with. You step out on the final eight count and slowly twirl back into his arms, your back now braced against his front. He tugs at your hips, holding you closer, “Mm,” He hums in your ear as you sway in your position, “Well I do like this.”

The sound of his accented voice filtering through the modulator sends a shiver down your spine, and you breathe out a light exhale as he releases you a moment later, turning you to face him.

“See,” You sigh, “You can dance.”

He hums in response, turning around to retrieve his weapon.

You move to face your hired gun, again leaning casually against the entryway.

“Do you actually know how to dance, Enzo?” You ask, reflecting on his earlier attempt at an intervention.

“-Wouldn’t matter if he did.” Boba interjects loudly over his shoulder, dismissing any ideas before they transpired.

You hear a light chuckle emitting through Enzo’s modulator, turning back to see his stance remaining motionless aside from the slight jerk in his shoulders.

Boba returns to your side, tapping his forehead against yours in an obvious farewell.

Your head falls heavily to one side as you tenderly hold one of his gloved hands, fingers tracing the rough fabric of his own. “Is that all the time you’ve allotted for me today, my king?” You say, a teasing smile pulling at your lips.

“Duty calls, I’m afraid.” He replies, “But perhaps I’ll come find you in a bit, see what further progress you’ve made.”

You nod, a slight frown tugging on your lips. You hesitate raising the concern suddenly weighing in your mind.

Ever since the incident with Crane occurred, Boba’s been...watchful. It’s not that he wasn’t protective of you before, it’s just that in the past few days he’s been protective of you in an entirely different way. He’s been hovering and checking in on you almost compulsively. Whereas before he seemed to want to keep you away during the busy hours of his day, now he seemed to want you near enough to reach in a moment's notice. Almost as if he’s worried you’ll abandon him when he’s not looking.

You wonder how he can still feel so worried after sharing such a fun and intimate moment with you.

So, you’ve given him some extra leeway, allowing him to hover to his heart's content until he seems secure in knowing that you’re not going anywhere.

That being said, you really didn’t mind Boba’s loitering close by to wherever you happened to be, you only wish you knew he wasn’t doing it because of the events that conspired earlier in the week.

“Boba,” You say lightly, catching his arm as he turns. “You don’t need to keep checking up on me, I’m not...you know I’m not going anywhere, right?”

He pauses at your words, hands stilling in their endeavor to tighten up loosened pieces of clothing and armor. You hope you haven't upset him in calling out his unusual conduct.

He averts his gaze to the side, pausing a moment before turning back to you. “I know.” He says nodding, a slight hint of defeat in his tone.

You hope perhaps some flattery will comfort him, stepping closer and lifting your gaze to meet his own. “My king,” you say in admiration, “You are a very busy man. You have a planet to rule. And an underworld to dominate. There are many things that I know put strain and worry in your mind, but whether or not your partner will still be here when you go looking for her should not be one of them.”

He doesn’t make any movements, and the face of his visor does little to allow you access to his thoughts.

“What I mean to say is,” You continue, “Go rule your empire. Your princess is safely stashed away in the palace you’ve encompassed her in.”

He breathes out a chuckle, and you smile, “I am happier here with you than I ever thought I’d be. I don’t want to be anywhere you won't be too, Boba Fett.” You reiterate your words from your conversation a few days ago. One that both started and ended with the two of you in tears. A rare moment between the two of you indeed. An exceedingly painful incident for him, having showcased the true depth of his love for you in such an unexpected and vulnerable way. And for you, to have seen the strongest and most fearless man you have ever known brought down to his knees, in tears, was absolutely gut-wrenching, especially in knowing that his own insecurities about your love had driven him to feel such fear.

You squeeze his arm and kiss the cheek of his helmet in valediction. His unmoving visor lingering on your face for an extended moment.  

Boba’s hand makes its way to the back of your head, pulling you forward slightly before gently meeting you in the middle with his own helmet. Your foreheads pressed together in an intimate and tender kiss.

He pulls away silently, giving you a nod, a gesture you return with a small smile before watching him exit the room, Enzo in tow.

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You make your way to the kitchens, stomach growling unhappily at having been neglected all afternoon. 

You pause under the doorway.

“I’ve seen you far too much today,” You sigh, feigning exasperation at the sight of Enzo shifting through the pantry for a meal to take to his room.

He stops his digging, turning to face you standing under the doorway before spinning back around.

“Vod’ika,” He greets, “Soup?” He holds a can up over his shoulder while reaching for a pot below the stove.

“No, thanks.” You say, approaching his station.

You pick up the canister of tomato soup, looking it over. “I doubt this tiny thing is even enough for just you.”

He glances down at the can in your hand. “I’ll do two then.”

You roll your eyes, what is it with these massive Mandalorians and not understanding proper nourishment?

“No, no.” You chide, “At least attempt to incorporate a healthy balance into your diet. Something with protein, maybe? Make a grilled porg-and-cheese melt to go with the soup. You can dip it in the broth, it’s delicious.”

His teal visor meets your face, shifting in uncertainty. “Can you do it?”

You sigh, “Fine.”

You get out the sandwich makings, opting to make one for yourself as well. You smear the bantha butter along four pieces of bread and grill them on a pan, layering sliced porg and cheese slices afterward.

You hear footsteps approaching the kitchen just as you’re pulling the finished sandwiches off the stove.

“Raul!” You greet with a smile, Enzo’s head whips in your direction. “We’re making sandwiches, want one?”

“You never sound that excited to see me.” Enzo declares.

You giggle at the accusation, sliding his sandwich onto a plate and handing it to him.

“Can I make you one, Raul?” You repeat.

He sighs, “No kid, thank you.” He steps forward and pulls Enzo’s plate from his hands, placing it away from him on the counter.

“Aye!” Enzo protests, wanting to transport his hot meal to his room so he could eat.

“We work for her,” Raul says, articulating the ‘we’ with an exaggerated hand gesture between the two of them. “You should be making her sandwich, not the other way around.”

“Oh, don’t be silly.” You groan, looking between the pair of Mandalorians.

“Yeah, Raul,” Enzo mocks, a slightly more threatening air to his tone. He retrieves the stolen soup and sandwich, “Don’t be a di’kut.”

Raul’s helmet tilts slightly at Enzo’s words. Not knowing exactly what the word means, but starting to get an unsettling feeling in your stomach, you attempt to intervene, “Guys-”

Just a moment too late.

Raul clamps a hand on Enzo’s arm, jolting him back from trying to pass him. His hand smacks the plate out of Enzo’s hand, the glass shattering before it even reaches the floor, and the soup and sandwich splattering everywhere.

“I made that-” You frown.

Now with two free hands, Enzo grips Raul’s shoulders and shoves him back against the brick ovens, a rough grunt escaping Raul when his helmet meets the open face of a hanging pan.

“Please stop-” You yelp, wincing as Enzo’s fist uppercuts into the weak spot under Raul’s helmet.

For being half a head shorter and not as obviously built as his opponent, the Mandalorian in black and teal armor could sure hold his own.

Raul spits something out in mando’a, his words seething as he grabs onto the cuff of the smaller Mandalorians neck covering and throws him with little exertion to the floor. You hear the crunching of glass beneath Raul’s boots as he growls with a foot on pressing to Enzo’s chest in an effort to force him into submission.

“-I wish you guys wouldn’t always do this.” You sigh, not bothering to shout anymore over the sound of beskar scraping against beskar.

You slide from your seat, taking your sandwich with you as you circle around the room to avoid becoming collateral damage in the red Mandalorian’s show of dominance.

“I have never witnessed two people fight over something so stupid in my life!” You call out behind you, tearing a piece of your sandwich off and popping it into your mouth. Leaving the sound of metal crashing against stone behind you.

---------------------------------

You sigh when you finally reach your room, ascending the steps inside your chambers to reach the bedroom. You’re about to sit down on the bed when you catch sight of your reflection, covered in dust patches and knee stains from when you scrubbed against the floor.  You opt to take a quick shower instead, washing out all the grime gathered in your hair and skin.

It takes a couple minutes of harsh scrubbing for the water to stop running off your body brown. You take extra care to wash behind your ears and around your hairline, where dirt likes to plant itself firmly.

You turn the water off when the last few soap suds slide off your hair, wrapping yourself in a warm towel.

Taking a glance out the window, you note that the suns are already setting low on the horizon, and resign yourself to just staying in for the rest of the night.

You pull on a slip dress and wrap yourself in Boba’s robe, inhaling his comforting, musky scent. You reach for your book on the nightstand before lighting a couple of candles around the space, creating a warm and cozy environment.  

Satisfied with the aesthetic you set around you, you plop down on your bed and hope to get a few chapters into your novel before Boba gets home. Admittedly getting distracted a couple times by the stunning, shaded view out your window, exposing you to the last few moments of the captivating sunset.  

Boba comes home a little over an hour later, the glow in your chambers now reduced to only a few lamps and the candlelight spread about your room, but enough to alert Boba of your presence.

You hear his heavy armored footsteps trudging up towards the bedroom. You turn your head expectantly when he reaches the top. Helmet in hand, he pauses for a moment upon seeing you, admiring the image of your figure wrapped up in his robe and curled up with a book, before stepping forward and greeting you with a kiss.

He pulls back, gaze immediately flickering to the window, probably having noticed it immediately upon entering the room but choosing to greet you before acknowledging it.

You groan internally, knowing what's coming.

“Mesh’la,” He hums, frowning at the open curtains exposing you to the darkness of the Tatooine night. A few dim lights from Mos Eisley shining in the distance. He steps forward to slide the curtains closed, you don’t complain, only having wanted them open for sunset. “What have I told you, little one? It's not safe to have these open.”

“I only just opened them, Boba.” You fib a little, hoping to reassure him.

He nods, unconvinced, before beginning to strip himself of his armor. You observe him unlatch the beskar piece-by-piece, placing the armor neatly in its designated chest.

He groans loudly when he sinks down beside you, arms raising behind his head.

You giggle at his tired show of soreness, eyes still glued to the pages of your book. “Old man,” You mutter.

“Watch it.” He growls lowly. You glance a peek at him, eyes closed heavily against his cheeks.

You ponder your bravery for a moment, sticking your nose back in your book before impulsively whispering, “Relic.” You shriek, bursting into a fit of laughter as he suddenly reaches over and wrestles the book out of your hands, using it to plant a harsh smack on your behind.

“Boba Fett!” You squeal, hands moving to shield your bum as the vibrations from his deep laugh shake the bed.

Still holding the book up in a threatening manner, a childlike gleam in his eyes, he challenges you, “Apologize.”

You consider tossing another remark out, eyes darting to the book in his hand, before deciding against it tonight.

Instead, you hoist yourself up onto your knees, allowing his robe to slowly slide down your form and meet the duvet, revealing the thin slip below. His closed-lip smile increases a little, eyes tracing down your form, book lowering slightly in the space above where he lay.

You crawl forward until your chest hovers above him, noses nearly touching, “My apologies, my king.” You whisper, pressing a kiss to his lips.

He deepens the kiss with a groan, your hand reaching back to grip your novel, which he allows you to slip from his fingers.

You let him attack you lips for another moment before you pull away. Having gotten what you wanted, you shift back to your side of the bed, turning to the page you left off at.

A deep chuckle rumbles out from Boba’s chest. “Alright, little one.” He says, “I'll let you play your game.”

He turns the light out on his side of the bed, pulling the blankets out and over the two of you before moving to embrace your form, leaning close to whisper in your ear, “-this time.”

A shiver runs down your spine and you try to resist the smile tugging at your lips, though you feel his own brushing against your ear in satisfaction.

“Tomorrow,” He says, shifting a little above you, “I’m heading into Mos Eisley with Fennec.

“What for?” You ask, finally marking your page and setting it aside.

“Nothing,” He grumbles, “I need to put on a little show of...authority, for a few people.”

You hum, “No big deal?” You question.

“Just a local inconvenience.” He gripes.

You nod slightly, not requiring any elaboration. You suppose you’ll have to entertain yourself tomorrow. “Well then, maybe I’ll have Raul teach me how to wield a dagger,” You quip, a grin back on your face.

Boba huffs out an amused puff of air, “I’d much prefer you with a blaster.” He says, apparently taking the idea seriously, “You don’t need to be up close to use it.”

“We’ll see then,” You say, standing to turn out the rest of the lights.

A single lit candle from your bedside table casts a warm glow over Boba’s face, eyes closed and head still leaning back against your bed-frame pillow.

“Get back on your side,” You chuckle, nudging him as you crawl back into your space.

“M’fine here.” He mumbles, leaning further over onto your pillow.

You smile, his body encasing yours and his nose presses into your neck.

“I’ll be fine here too you know.” You mutter, referencing the day you’ll be spending without his guard. 

“You finally gonna stop worrying about me?” You tease, having received no response.

He shakes his head, snuggling deeper into your neck, “Never.”

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A/N pt.2:  So I wrote this and I thought it was great then I read it back a few times and realized literally nothing happened haha im so sorry 😅😅😅

Literally spent too many hours on this not to upload though so I suppose here’s a filler chapter my bad lots of love 🥰

#an angel amongst demons #Boba Fett #boba x reader #boba x you #the mandalorian #book of boba fett #din djarin #mando #boba!palace #soft!boba #king!boba #boba fett x reader #boba's palace

[found--family]

We were waiting so many years for something to happen between Dean and Cas, for something to prove we are not imagining this and all those people who abandoned the show years ago now are shitting on that scene because Dean didn’t immideately said it back?! 12 years of incredibly complex relationship and they really think it could be resolved with usual hetero “I love you” - “I love you too”? If that has happened they would be the first to tell how unrealistic it was. I’m so done with antis 😤

(sorry this got so long, also sorry for my lack of links! if anyone's after something in particular i can probably help you find The Thing.)

Your anger is valid nonny 💙

A lot of the hate going around and the jokes being made at the expense of these characters and their journey is coming from people who have never watched the show or who don't ship Dean/Cas, but that doesn't bother me much. It's frustrating but haters gonna hate so best to just ignore the outsiders.

What does bother me, just as you mention, are the shippers who either stopped watching years ago OR who are up-to-date with season 15 but they view That Scene in a negative light and are bitching into the digital void, dampening the celebratory mood of shippers who view That Scene in a positive light.

I feel sorry for the shippers who feel disappointed or angered by the dialogue in That Scene, Dean's reaction, and Castiel's "death", because honestly what show have they been watching? TBH i think if they were more involved in the fandom they would've come across informative content (in its multitude of forms) that would help them see there's So Much to be positive about.

Let's work backwards:

We will see Cas again. afaik Misha has one more episode on his season allotment contract (possibly 2? which would probably mean a brief cameo in 15x19) if you want some hard facts - i don't have links but Google is your friend here. Also, the entire cast + crew have been pretty damn quiet in the wake of 15x18 (bar a few Twitter interactions and the DarkLight Convention livestream), which is a Big Damn Clue that they're holding back because Something More is yet to come; even Misha has refrained from posting about it on his social media accounts - i think there was 1 post? - which is very unlike him (plus we hear he's written an essay about Cas' coming out which he's yet to share, possibly waiting until after his Real final episode airs, ie. 15x20). Then there's Castiel's story: it's not over. We know The Empty is compromised due to Jack's cosmic implosion, we know there are ways into and out of The Empty, and with cosmic Entities meeting their end this season maybe The Shadow will too? Plus, Cas being left in The Empty isn't a peaceful ending for him (as Ruby mentioned, those trapped there relive their greatest regrets on a loop) and also: Been There Done That In That Place so it's not a good ending writing-wise. Not to mention what we've seen of grieving!Dean means he won't find peace either as long as Cas is in The Empty/dead. 15x18 was exclusively Castiel's love confession, so Dean's is surely on it's way, which means More Cas!

Dean’s reaction was very much in-character for him. Dean's a volatile smelting pot of Anger and Too Much Heart, especially this season, and while we've seen him blow up about some matters (Chuck's machinations, failing, losing people, etc.) and be honest and vulnerable about how he's feeling (with Sam, with Jack, with Cas - usually in regards to Chuck's BS, although I'm not just talking about season 15) Cas' love confession was something else altogether, something personal just for him, for them, something Brand New: Dean's best friend reveals he's in love with him, which is unprecedented for Dean on both counts. Losing people and losing battles and suffering because of trauma and his upbringing and The Ongoing Hunter Life - that's not new. But he has zero experience with receiving genuine love confessions, which also happen to come from his best friend (who he is also in love with if the past 12 seasons are anything to go by). So his shock/tongue-tied reaction is justified, it's expected really, because like you say an "I love you, too, Cas" just wouldn't feel organic for Dean or his years-long relationship with Cas (plus it's too soon, story-wise). While Misha gave us a stellar emotional outpouring for Cas (appropriate, since he was spilling his heart) Jensen did what he does best: micro-expressions, the nuance acting he's imbued into Dean's character since season 1 and one of the top reasons He Deserves All The Awards. Anyone who complains about Dean's "lack of reaction" isn't taking into account his shock and are apparently not fans of the show because again, that's Dean/Jensen, the subtle emotional shifts in his expression that have (skilfully) conveyed Dean's state of heart and mind through the years (when his contrasting emotional outbursts weren't on display). I understand wanting more from Dean in that moment, that folks feel cheated because they didn't get More, but.. we did: Tears steadily filled Dean's eyes as the scene progressed; Fear added to his Shock as Billie and The Empty showed up and as Cas was stolen away; and OFC the curled-up-and-freakin-sobbing moment at the end as everything sunk in, as he realised he couldn't even answer Sam's call (even if something else had gone wrong) because he would've broken down - which he did.

@ the folks who wanted more from Dean in That Scene: It's There. It's in the micro-expressions, meta, parallels, subtext, symbolism, callbacks - because this show has always needed more than a passing glance; it's about the layers, the story which every cast and crew member has always had a hand in enriching by giving the audience Something More to think about, More to feel. It's in the 15 years of Dean's character journey. It's in that closing scene. It's in the 2 whole episodes we're yet to see. It's there, you just gotta look for it. You're watching Supernatural, after all.

Once again, I encourage folks to read the brilliant meta that's been coming out in the wake of 15x18 (and all of season 15) as well as the insightful thought-posts of shippers who understand the layers and the journey of Dean and Cas' relationship and manage to sum-up canon happenings so beautifully in a hundred words or less.

And you're 100% right nonny 💚

We deserve this love story because we know Dean and Cas deserve this love story, because those involved in making the show have been building towards this for 12 years, that The Slowest Burn To Ever Slow deserves acknowledgement, closure, and a happy ending.

I know it can be hard to stay positive when your dash is littered with negativity, but remember you control the flow: use that block function for tags and post content. Unfollow and block the blogs you need to. If others get their rocks off criticising and hating The Things You Love, just ignore them. They're gonna live mad about Stuff but you don't have to. Pity the haters, but don't let them get you down. Also, post/like/reblog as much positive content as you can find; drown the haters in love.

You deserve happiness just like our beloved OTP.

#q and a #destiel #spn 15x18 #thoughts #15x18 #dean #s15

[goyurim]

eighteen again is so good!! i can finally understand what all the hype was about! also lee do hyun is just 👏🏽👏🏽 i’m obsessed!

aaaahhhhhh really??? yaaaayyyy i'm so glad you came around!!! honestly its incredibly underrated (i don't know why? is it because the cast is fairly new? or the timing? is it even popular in korea? there's barely any content on tumblr 😔) so i get way too excited when people give it the attention it deserves!

and yesss all the awards to mr lee do hyun for doing such a wonderful job tbh he really feels like a 40 y/o trapped in a teen's body lmao. what an amazing actor i can't believe this is the first i'm hearing of him? i really hope he gets more roles and popularity in the future!

#eighteen again #jtbc eighteen again #18again #once again i am asking the audience to not sleep on this show #it might not be your fave but it has wonderful characters and themes and is definitely worth your time #💌 #komal 🌷

[gamerwoo]

I hit 3k this morning (and then fell back to 2,998 and then back up to 3k) so to celebrate another big milestone, I thought I should go through and make a list of some of my favorite blogs and mutuals that I love and appreciate :] (featuring lil notes for my favorite faves at the bottom). I’ll probably miss some people since I’m throwing this together and because a lot of people have changed their urls (and I might accidentally mention people twice bc some of y’all have sideblogs and such and I cannot keep track I’m so sorry), but thank you to every single person who follows me for all the love and support for my content. I appreciate it more than I can express! 💗

[italic names are mutuals, bold names are blogs that have my fave content, hearts are for those w a message at the end uwu. and I’m sorry if I didn’t put as mutuals when we actually are because sideblogs are hard to keep track of]

♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♡

#-D:

@1ightsaber | @2miin | @baekwell--tart ❤ | @blossomjeno | @candiedmingyu | @checkin-london | @cheolsbae | @cupcakewoozer | @dreamjunhui ❤

E-I:

@fay-land​ | @felixsfxckingfreckles​ | @floodlitesc​ ❤ | @gaegurikyu ❤ | @gayforseungcheol​ | @grekirikka​ | @gyuhao-kisses​ | @heartskun​ ❤ | @hoshees​ | @hoshiandhearts 

J-N:

@jamjamismyjam​ | @je0nghans​ | @jejublr​ | @jeonghnassi​ | @jeon-wonwon​ | @jinslefteyebrow​ | @kwonsoonshine​ | @linm0mo | @middle-of-a-wonshua-sandwich | @moonlight-jiggy​ | @mukeovernetflix​ | @nct-tae-yong | @nervousatthenightclub​ | @neverknewgrey2016 ❤ | @nunupillie 

O-R:

@oksws​ | @ourstarrywonder​ | @purpleseleva | @queenaliceofthenight | @realstraykids | @ripperoonii​ ❤ | @royalbins​ 

S-V:

@sadienita ❤ | @sefuns​ | @serendipitioustaehyung | @shuvee​ | @smilesohwas​ | @smut-wars​ | @softhaos | @softseventeens​ ❤ | @soft-pentagon | @softwonwoo | @softyexo | @soonyoungz​ | @sparklekook​ | @strgaykids​ | @sugahoshi-t​ | @sundropsoo | @sunburnt4junghoseok | @vixx-me-up 

W-Z:

@wonholdmyheart​ | @wonnhao​ | @wooshooook | @wooyu-niverse | @yeo1 | @yeosprout | @ziyanqyanq

♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♡

To Bella: The sassiest, sauciest bitch (and I mean that endearingly). My girl, you are so talented, I’m jealous. Like, your writing is just...it’s art. I could never. Plus, I don’t know of many people who could write while also keeping up with a child. You’re really super mom, and I really gotta give you props for that. I know you’ve been going thru it lately, but you’re a strong, badass bitch, and I know you’ll get through it. I’m always here for you like you’ve been there for me in the past. and if you ever need me to throw hands at any rude ass anons, I’m your gal. 💕

To Ryan: MY SON!!!! I know you know I’d kill and die for you, but friendly reminders are always nice. I really can’t believe we became friends over some svt booty discourse because you are the most pure n precious bean ever. I feel extra protective of you because you’re like my baby brother or something, and like I get really sad when I see you upset (even though I suck w advice and I feel like I never reply wow world’s worst friend award @ me) but I hope you know I’m always going to be here for you, and I swear that one day I will give you the world’s biggest hug. 💘

To Rii: My big ray of sunshine :’). Even though I don’t think we’ve spoken much as of late, talking to you always makes me feel better. You always cheer me on with my writing and reassure me it’s not hot garbage, but honestly, I’m just trying to be as good of a writer as you. You’re one of the sweetest people I’ve ever met, and you’re absolutely adorable, and I love hearing the lil stories from your everyday life that you randomly tell me. I hope you know how much you mean to me, and I hope that you still know that even when my dumb ass forgets to reply lmao. I love you!! 💝

To Koko: The ultimate meme lord. I know we don’t speak as much as we used to, but you’re one of those people that you can’t help but still feel close to just because you’re so...good? Like, I don’t know how to explain it other than that. You’re just so sweet and caring and you’ve always been somebody to try to cheer up others (usually with A+ memes). I love whenever you send me things on twitter (even if it’s of breadstick demon) because like, just that you think of me makes me so happy, and I hope you know that I’m always here for you for literally anything. You’re one of my favorite people. 💖

To Raven: My sweet child :’) (everybody is my child omfg I’m so old). You’re so creative and you’re so helpful and it’s so cute because you love to help and it comes in handy for somebody like me who’s ???? about everything. I’m still forever grateful of your hand in SEVENDREAM tbh, and all of the lil oneshots and such I’ve done before. You always send in requests which makes me happy, but you’re also always there for me whenever I’m feeling down. You are the most adorable lil bean and I’m so thankful to have a friend like you. 💟

To Star: I know you’re the mom, but I always feel a lil weird calling you mom. So, uh...Star. My main bitch. My ride or die. My go-to for just about everything. I know we have like, 4 years between us, but I feel so so so close with you. You’re the one I go to for writing help, for editing, for overall advice, and lately, I can even go to you for Spongebob memes which like, 12/10 friendship right there. You always know how to cheer me up, and you always encourage me to do whatever it is I want to do. You may torture me with breadstick and tree demon, but I love you all the same. 💜

To Cady: Oh my god, my lil cutie pie. I think you were like, the first friend I ever made on here??? That’s a throwback. But listen, I know you’re busy with school and sports and everything, but that doesn’t change anything. We may not talk all the time since you’re busy and I’m busy (and also forgetful; very, very forgetful) but I still care about you so much. I know you get stressed out with things sometimes, but just know I’m always rooting for you, and I’ll always be here if you need anything. I love you so much!! 💞

To Mercy: My sweet, pure lil bean. You’re possibly a real angel?? You’re so sweet and you’re so wise?? Like, I don’t know if I’ve ever described anybody as wise, but it seems fitting. You speak like you’ve lived for years sometimes and it’s amazing. You’ve always been there to help me out with my own mental health, and I hope I can be that friend for you (even if I have no idea how to advice). You’re such a talented writer, and an amazing person all around. You deserve only the best things in life. 💌

To Ellie: My precious gumdrop. You were one of my OG anons back in the day, and now look at us :’). I can’t imagine not having you as a friend, honestly. You’re hilarious, you’re sweet, you love to torture me with Wonwoo but it’s okay because I love you (and secretly love when you torture me, there I said it 😤). I still feel bad about that one time I didn’t know your name bUT I KNOW IT NOW and I promise, I’m still working on that nickname for you. I just want it to be perfect. Like you. I’m sorry, I had to go for the cheesy line. ANYWAY, I love you a lot. 💛

#IM SO SORRY IF I MISSED ANYBODY DON'T HATE ME

[janiedean]

Ok I need to know your thoughts about this Green Book mess

... pray for me anon XD

anyway, never mind that my general thought is that I’m really sad the mule didn’t compete this round because then it’d have deserved all the awards hands down........

tldr: the fact that people are outraged is the proof that tumblr at large can’t recognize classism when it hits you in the face.

in longer words: 95% of the hot takes I’m reading are Patently False And It Shoes People Haven’t Seen That Movie.

in much longer words: counting that I haven’t seen all the nominees but I did see both blakkk/lansman (which from now will be BKKK) and blackpanther and green book (and borap but that one wasn’t gonna win best movie anyway so) and I guess that is where the crux is, so, in order.

bkkk was obviously the best movie of the lot quality speaking. in an ideal world, it would have one. except that bkkk is a movie that’s heavily political and if y’all think that the oscars would give a prize to the heavily political movie that directly criticizes the administration in power then y’all missed the part where that’s not what happens at the oscars. last time it happened it was 1978 and the deer hunter won and I still don’t know wtf was the jury’s state of grace at that point, but in 1980 they had apocalypse now in the list and kramer vs kramer won. like. guys. if you have APOCALYPSE NOW on the list and anything else wins in the major categories then you’re a joke. and tbh it surprises me that spike l/ee is still hoping he might snag a major win that’s not for screenplay with these parameters - they’re not gonna go there. hasn’t happened since ‘78. come on;

bp was not a best movie flick. like, guys: it’s not even the best mcu film around as far as I’m concerned and while it most likely deserved the technical awards..... seriously? like. if neither GB nor bkkk won then any other movie on the list had better shots than bp. I can’t even think people seriously assume it was best movie material or ON PAR WITH BKKK as in, ‘if bkkk doesn’t win then THAT ONE should have won’. like, no;

now: green book was a *safe* pick in the sense that it wasn’t as heavy-handed as bkkk when it came to be political so it was the perfect choice if they wanted to go like ‘oh hey see we gave the award to the movie about racism without giving it to the one raising the middle finger to donald trump’, but differently from moon/light (which according to me was the most political political win of the last ten years like guys sorry that movie was nowhere near as good as people said back then and I found it incredibly overrated, and before you tell me that it’s because I didn’t understand it: exactly the point. the wire is one of my fave shows ever and it tacked all the things moon/light tried to except that it did it vastly better and I actually got it for how well it was written, moon/light completely failed in that sense and I’m glad if it was a good movie for the people it was directed to but it didn’t engage beyond that target imvho but never mind that) it actually tackled very well a series of issues I never see discussed in US cinema when it comes to *racism-themed* movies and I thought it was a really well-made movie that nailed a lot of things especially when it came to how classism and racism interject themselves in the discourse and how you don’t get out of discarding one of them so easily.

specifically, with SPOILERS FROM THE MOVIE under the cut SO GO AHEAD AT WILL OR NOT:

now: all the posts ‘this is the usual movie about the white guy who gets the black friend’ already are obviously from people who haven’t seen it because they missed the basic point, as in: that the white guy is poor and uneducated and isn’t *racist* because he’s a terrible person, he is out of ignorance and not knowing any better BUT at the same time he’s not so narrow-minded that he doesn’t have fairly forward opinions on other -isms (see THAT REVEAL IN THE MIDDLE OF THE MOVIE after which he goes like ‘I’ve been a bouncer in most of new york’s night clubs do you think I mind that thing’ which is a thing the audience wouldn’t have thought since italian-american men from the 50s/60s notoriously came from a fairly -PHOBIC culture in that specific sense), and that the guy being italian-american ie a *white* category that back then did not have *white privilege* put him in a lower class position than the black guy;

on the other side, it was spelled that the black guy’s issue was the contrary in the sense that he’s rich, he’s cultured, he speaks five languages, he’s not a stereotype and since people want stereotypes or expect them, he can’t seem to please either side and feels alienated from both, which I think is a discourse that should be way more relevant in a website where people talk all the time about people of color not being stereotypes and so on;

like the entire fucking point of that movie is that white guy overcomes his racism unlearning his ignorance and black guy has a few realizations about how classism works and reconnects with his heritage throughout the entire thing;

and the fact that it was the black guy explaining the white guy how to write the poetic love letters without grammar mistakes and got him to appreciate finer things in life while the white guy helped him get down to earth (which he plot-wise definitely needed - he was unhappy af before XD) *and* at the same time the movie never fucking forgot that skin color > money when it comes to systematical racism in the south (ie the scene where they get stopped by the southern policeman and white guy punches him bc he basically told him that being italian-american was being half-the-n-word and black guy tells him ‘yeah well I handled that my entire life you could deal with it once’ was FAIRLY DAMNED OBVIOUS even if it also showed that it’s Not How Things Should Go) was imvo a very good narrative choice/balancing;

also, I was really appreciating that scene where don asks tony (a guy who has no idea who orpheus is and thinks orpheus and eurydice is about orphans) to shorten his name because vallelunga is too difficult to pronounce and tony’s like ‘if the people you play for are so cultured they can learn to pronounce my name properly’ because like guys that’s a thing that happens with all non-anglophone names and seeing it come from someone who hasn’t had an education but doesn’t want to be *made better* because that doesn’t make them unworthy and then only accepts help when he wants it and doesn’t come from a position of ‘you need to look more presentable’ but from ‘I want to make your life better’ was really fucking nice excuse me, because it *did* make a point about how not being formally educated means that people are considered lesser when they shouldn’t have to fight for it, and I thought that the class-switch in there was a really great idea;

anyway nvm my specific opinions about specific scenes, the point is: green book is not heavy-handed and admittedly is a lot more sugary than BKKK and has the feel-good ending that makes it palatable for easy wins, but the content is fucking everything but sugary or devoid of discussing Serious Issues that I almost never see tackled in this kind of US movie and if people actually wanted to watch a movie that sees the subject counting that class relations exist, that some -isms are culturally learned and can be overcome, that money counts when we’re discussing how people are treated in the US, the *earned whiteness* concept (because tony is *white* but hasn’t *earned whiteness* and it’s plenty damned obvious) and that class relations are not automatically clear-cut *especially in the US* then green book is an absolutely valid choice. and like...... it wasn’t white saviorism in the sense that WHITE GUY GETS REDEEMED AND BECOMES UN-RACIST, it’s about two people growing and learning from each other and the fact that tony’s racism is tied to a) upbringing while being poor b) not literally knowing any better but that it doesn’t really take that much for him to see that his opinions are wrong when usually it’s poor black person vs rich white person, and actually that’s why I thought calling it reverse driving miss daisy was reaaaally not getting the point, so if people actually saw the damned movie before deciding it’s terrible that’d be nice;

I also think sp/ike lee was beyond rude in his, er, reactions to GB’s win, but then again... listen guys I love the man’s movies but since that time he went like ‘clint eastwood can’t make movies about charlie parker’ (??) and dismissed the italian partisans’s associations complains about what he did in miracle in st. anna (a movie I did actually really like but they were right about him villainizing the resistence when he could have not) with basically I DON’T CARE THAT YOU MIGHT HAVE ISSUES WITH HOW I, AN AMERICAN, DEPICTED A FAIRLY IMPORTANT PIECE OF ITALIAN HISTORY... like he needs to chill and to realize that there’s a thing called losing with grace and he’s not doing it.

tldr: bkkk imvo deserved to win way more and tbqh if I was spike I’d complain about bp having gotten more awards than his movie when bp really is the safest choice ever if we wanna talk about politics win, and I can agree that GB was a political choice, but it was not a bad political choice nor a racist one and actually it raised a lot of issues that I’d like to see explored more in movies because they usually aren’t. on top of that I thought mahershala ali’s performance in gb was fucking stellar and definitely was miles better than his part in moonlight (but like... bc he was in moonlight for TWENTY MINUTES, he was co-lead here) and I’m honestly baffled that when he won for moonlight there were gifsets everywhere and here there aren’t when this role was WAY better and more nuanced and with more to chew, never mind that again, he deserved it just for the speech under the rain I was discussing before. but like..... of course we’re all ignoring it??

also: I’m really laughing that tumblr as a whole is crying about GB winning when until two days ago bkkk was the worst thing ever because adam dr/iver starred in it and OMG OF COURSE HE WAS CHOSEN TO PLAY THE KKK MEMBER BECAUSE HE REALLY IS RACIST [lmao as if spike l/ee would work with a really racist person] and no one on this website gave a single fuck about it when it came out except for adam dr/iver fan blogs but now everyone is like OMG WHY DIDN’T BKKK WIN???!!!!! like guys you didn’t care about BKKK until a day ago and now I’m supposed to think you were rooting for it all along? when you all hated it because omg how dare they cast ky/lo ren in something where he’s not a bad guy? like we serious? come the fuck on, no one on here cared. and the fact that if blackpanther had won no one would say BKKK not winning = UTTERMOST CRIME just says all about how a film’s quality is judged around here. bye, I said my piece.

#1 #2 #3 #4 #5 #k i said i was gonna shut up but #fuck all i'm really tired of seeing people dissing gb without having seen it #bye #Anonymous #ask post

[themikewheelers]

People need to shut the FRICK up about Noah and Caleb never getting recognition. Every other freaking post is "They never get enough credit so here's a thousand pictures about them" you know who never gets any recognition?! Dustin. Gaten. I never see any appreciation posts for him. He is the funniest out of the stranger things kids and even though he didn't have to pretend to be possessed he still did a good job playing Dustin and he deserves recognition. Rant over sorry bye

Noah honestly gets more attention from this fandom than every other cast member combined tbh. And okay this is gonna turn a little ranty but all ppl ever do is whine about him not getting an Emmy nomination and it’s so freaking ridiculous bc 1) Noah isn’t going to get an Emmy or any other award as long as Will Byers stays the kind of role it is now and 2) It’s just making Noah look bad when his fans are creating this reputation for him

Adding onto reason 1, Will Byers is not a role that gets awards and I don’t think people realize that. Noah is an AMAZING actor and he does such a good job, the reason he isn’t getting nominations isn’t because of his acting or because of the awards people, it’s bc of the role. These awards are about a lot more than just “who acted the best” it’s about who’s able to convey the best range of acting and Will isn’t a role where Noah really gets to do that. Within the show, Will only really shows 2 primary emotions, fear and sadness, then with some few scenes showing others but for the most part he shows those two emotions. And Noah does a GREAT job with those emotions and he’s a super talented actor who really does such a good job, but the role he’s in doesn’t give him enough of a range to rlly get these awards. It’s not a role where he really gets to show off a variety of emotions and ways of acting, and that’s what you need to get awards. And that’s also why Millie and David are always the ones who get nominations, because on the other side of things, their characters are the ones written with the most range and so many different emotions so Millie and David are better able to showcase dynamic styles of acting. It doesn’t mean they’re any better actors than Noah or that the awards are biased towards them, it’s just the fact that their roles in the show are the kind of roles that win awards, and Will Byers isn’t the kind of role that gets awards. 

But frankly, that’s not what bothers me. It bothers me how the fandom will not STOP with complaining about Noah not getting an Emmy and no one seems to realize that reflects badly on HIM. Noah has done his best to be so mature and supportive throughout every single awards show for his fellow cast members and has kept such a positive attitude. But that doesn’t change the fact that when people hear about him, all they hear is his fans whining he didn’t get a nomination and tearing down other actors, and that’s impacting NOAH’s reputation and making HIM look bad, even if he’s being perfectly mature about it himself. If you want to support Noah, start by, I don’t know, actually supporting him. And tearing down the television academy and other actors and all that is not supporting him, it’s the opposite in fact. 

And about Caleb, it’s honestly bs. He gets so much attention, but the attention he does get is nothing but “Support Caleb!!! Don’t forget about him!!! Give him attention!!” without ever actually supporting him or anything. Just like the fandom does with Lucas himself, it’s completely hypocritical. People just want to use Caleb and Lucas to make themselves look good by “supporting” the poc for “woke points” without actually supporting either of them. If you want to appreciate Caleb or Lucas, stop with the goddamn “Appreciate them!!” posts and actually start posting or reblogging content appreciating them. 

And tbh you’re right that Gaten rlly does get no attention. He is such a sweet kid but I do feel like I never see anything about him. This fandom definitely has an attitude like “Okay let’s talk about Millie, Finn, and Noah!!” and then only mentions anyone else as an afterthought. And I don’t want to get too ranty with this because I don’t want to be hypocritical myself, with those “appreciate x!!!” posts without actually appreciating them, but at least speaking for myself, I do wanna do better when it comes to acknowledging all the cast members, and I think that’s something we should all be trying 

[holochromatic]

all these sebastian appearances that started with tiff... is the man ever gonna give us a break?

i mean, i'm kind of at a point where it feels like we've hit this level of overexposure and i'm finding myself not as excited for new seb content as i was five months ago. before tiff, it was usually months between interviews, cons, or photoshoots (sometimes many months), so getting new seb material was a Big Deal...

... but now? now we're seeing new pics every week or two and as much as i absolutely adore him, it's too much. it's exhausting (if not impossible) keeping up the same level of excitement when he's attending at least one event every single week. i mean, i am absolutely thrilled that he's finally, finally getting the attention he deserves, but damn, does all the attention have to come at once?

anyway, all of the above stuff really leads to this, my Actual Point: can seb's people please wrangle him some downtime? all the attention coming at once means that he's constantly going back and forth all over north america either promoting I, Tonya, attending awards ceremonies and cons, sitting for interviews, or filming for Avengers and Destroyer and the man must be run fucking ragged at this point. i get the need for the press tour stuff for I,Tonya, but surely some of these magazine spreads could be scheduled a few months out? press tours are already a lot to deal with and i don't see other actors doing multiple fashion shoots concurrent with press. it just seems like too much tbh and i honestly don't know how he's still on his feet or able to speak coherently at this point. like... please don't let my fave die from exhaustion, okay? much appreciated

#sebastian stan #sebastian stan text #let! him! rest! #let! us! rest! #2am rambles #hell idek if i'm speaking coherently right now and i'm most certainly getting more rest than seb is

[aubaskin-blog]

about me!

so i found this 150 random questions thing so im gonna answer them all cool? cool. (link to original post at bottom)

1. ) What’s better, having high expectations or having low expectations? Low expectations because if you expect the worst, you'll never be disappointed. If the worst happens you'll have expected it, and if it ends up good you'll be happier (I learned that from the Ranger's Apprentice books)

2.) Would you rather go without junk food for a year or go without TV for a year? Junk food because I eat wayyyyy too much junk

3.) Describe your perfect man/woman. Honestly, I'll know the best when I see it. I can't just imagine a perfect person

4.) Thoughts on school dress codes? Good to a point, but can be stupid. My school has a 'no shoulders' rule which is stupid af, but I understand they want people to wear actual clothes to school

5.)Any strange phobias? Nope I'm boring

6.) At what job do you see Donald Trump best fit? A business leader. The country is not a business to be run, and he shouldn't be running it

7.) Who was your first crush? A kid named Pranav in 5th grade. He left our school but I still follow him on Instagram

8.) Who was your first best friend? Two girls named Maggie and Cara (or something like that) in 3rd grade. Cara moved and Maggie stopped being friends with me the next year, although I still see her around sometimes

9.)What is one weird thing about you? I say my hobby is reading, but 99% of the time I'm reading gay fanfiction

10.) Top 5 TV shows you like to watch? The Flash, Supergirl, Forensic Files, Voltron: Legendary Defender, and Pokemon

11.) What are your favorite boys names? Elliot and Oliver

12.) What are your favorite girls names? Ellis, Eden, Athena, unique names like those

13.) Do you have any tattoos? If so, what are they? Nope

14.) Do you plan on getting (more) tattoos? If so, what do you want to get as of the moment? I want some but I want them to be meaningful and all my ideas now are fleeting ideas

15.) Do you have any piercings? Do you plan on getting more? I got my ears pierced a looooong time ago but I stopped wearing earrings after my sister had to get her earlobe stitched together when her earring went through the bottom of her earlobe. I don't even want to wear earrings now

16.) Do you like hugging people? YES I'm a super touchy person and hugs are wonderful

17.) Think of ANY person on earth right now.  Who did you think of? My mom. First it was Newt Scamander before I remembered that he's fictional

18.) Do you have an iPhone? iPhone 8, yes

19.) What is the worst thing that could happen in your life right now? My phone breaks and can't get replaced for a while

20.) Do you watch anime? I used to watch it a lot more but I watch it in like, bursts of a single show over a few days and stop for a while and do it again

21.) What brings true happiness? Love and contentment

22.) What is the most expensive thing you’ve ever paid for? I honestly have no idea

23.) If you could have any job in the world and get paid millions of dollars a year for it, what would you be and why? A stay-at-home reader. I wouldn't have to do anything but read and that's what I do all the time anyways

24.) Do you want children? If so, how many? Yes, 2 or 3 depending on what my partner wants

50.) Have you ever been in a physical fight? No way

51.) When you get out of the shower, do you towel dry, blow dry, or air dry your hair? Towel dry, then air dry once I'm tired of hauling a towel around on my head

52.) When you go to the movies, what snacks and drinks do you take with you? I buy them there or don't have any at all (but I like Sprite and candy like Skittles or Sour Patch Kids)

53.) Do you like going to the beach? If so, do you like to stay dry or go in the water? If not, why? I don't really like the beach but if I'm there I'll have fun. I only go in the water if it's warm (it's usually not)

54.) Do you untie your shoes when you take them off? Only if I have to. Not usually though

55.) If you could have a superpower ASIDE from being invisible or being able to fly, what would you have? Being able to fill things up. Need money? Fill up my wallet/bank account. Want to stop talking to someone? Fill up their bladder. You can even fill up your phone battery :D

56.) If you were able to live for however long you wanted to (i’m talking thousands of years without aging), when would you choose to die? Whenever I decided I was done living and that there was nothing else for me on Earth

57.) What do you think happens after you die? It fades to black, like falling asleep except then your conscious disappears forever (I don't like thinking about that part, it's what makes me scared of dying)

58.) Do you believe in aliens? If we exist there has to be someone else out there

59.) Do you believe in ghosts? No but they still scare me

60.) Do you believe in spiritual things like ouija boards, tarot cards, and crystals? Do you believe they are portals for evil entities to enter the mortal world? No and I think Ouija boards are stupid but the rest are fun to just play with. I'm not spiritual at all

61.) If you could make one mythical being real, who/what would you make? Unicorns but they would be poached for their horns so I want to make sure they don't all go extinct so they can fly away in a rainbow burst to avoid hunters

62.) Do you get tan, or do you burn? Both but tan first (I think). SUNSCREEN IS VERY IMPORTANT

63.) Describe your shower routine. Shampoo, body wash, rinse out shampoo and body wash, conditioner, wait a little bit, rinse conditioner

64.) Do you enjoy school? Why or why not? Yes because of my friends, no because of homework and stress

65.) In your opinion, what is the worst way to die? Long and painfully. Short deaths sound better.

66.) Do you get carsick, sea sick, or airplane sickness? I kinda get seasick, and I used to get carsick but that's gotten better. Airplanes I just get bored

67.) What’s one memory that you wish you could live again and again? I don't think I would want to continually live a memory tbh

68.) What were some of your stuffed animal’s names from when you were a kid? I had a lavender colored stuffed dog...it was named 'Purple Doggy'

69.)Do you have any pets? Yes, one black lab named Sarah and two identical white sister cats named Tammi and Sammi

70.) Describe your daily wardrobe. Graphic t-shirt and jeans/jean shorts. Jacket or sweatshirt if its cold

71.)  Describe what your daily wardrobe would be if you were rich. Probably the same, ngl

72.)  Create a character right now.  Give them a name, age, and character description. Ellis, 19, had to quit college to support her younger brother, works at a bookstore, light brown wavy shoulder length hair and green eyes

73.)What was the last thing you bought? A fidget toy and a book called '3000 Questions About Me'. And a wonder where I came up with this idea.

74.) Have you ever bought a CD? What band was it for? My sister bought a Taylor Swift CD when she was like 8, but I only have Sims games and a movie on CD

75.) Describe your perfect ice cream sundae. Vanilla ice cream, sprinkles, a little bit of chocolate sauce, three cherries because sundae cherries are good

76.) If you could make ANYTHING happen right now with no cost, trouble, or obstacles, what would you do? Make myself have the marching band music good and memorized lol that's really getting me

77.) What are some of your favorite physical activities to do? I don't do physical activity

78.) What were some of your favorite shows as a child? Dora, Zoey 101, iCarly

79.) Describe how you would survive the zombie apocalypse.  I wouldn't

80.) What are some things you shouldn’t say at work? “Wow, my boss really sucks”

81.) If you were told that if you killed someone, you would save 100 people, would you do it? Yes but it would probably haunt me

82.) How’s the weather right now? Sunny, kind of windy, warm (I'm just looking outside)

83.) What is the background on your cell phone right now? A picture of a city I got from Google

84.) Is it better to work at a job that you love or a job that pays well? Job you love

85.) What do you have within arms reach of your bed? My phone charger, alarm clock, an IKEA cart with a bunch of random stuff, usually my glasses, anything else I leave on the window sill

86.) Have you ever been fired from a job? If so, why? Being fired would require having a job in the first place

87.) Have you ever won a trophy, prize, or medal? If so, for what? I've gotten a decent number of soccer medals from my childhood, and I got two regional and one state trophies from DI (Destination Imagination) when I was in 4th and 5th grade. I haven't gotten any actual individual awards

88.) Do you have any posters, pictures, or art hanging on your walls in your room? If so, what are they? I have a pride flag, and a galaxy calendar from last year just for the pictures. No art though

89.) Are you afraid of the dark? If so, why? Not really, but I don't like running up the stairs at night when the house is dark. I get scared of what could be behind me

90.)What is something that you’ve never done but would like to try? Skydiving, lots of stuff with my friends, nothing in particular

91.) If you could choose three famous people or characters to be friends with, who would you choose and why? Hermione Granger-she's a genius and sassy af, Newt Scamander- his hair is the best omg I love him and his actor (Eddie Redmayne :))) ), and John Laurens (from Hamilton)- he deserved better. So much better.

92.) Do you smile at strangers when you pass by them on the street? Sometimes, but it can get creepy fast

93.) Do you have a favorite TV commercial? If so, what is it? I probably do, but I can't think of one in particular

94.) Do you like your handwriting? When it looks good, yes

95.) Cable TV or Netflix? Netflix, but I tend to watch cable more

96.) What are your favorite smells? Vanilla, black cherry and s'mores

97.) Do you consider yourself physically strong? Lol no way

98.) Describe a time where you said something really rude or mean, whether intentional or not. I can't think of a particular time but a good portion of the time if I say something mean I mean it and they deserve it.

99.) Do you ask strangers to pet their dogs? Of course, it's very rude other wise. If this is about petting dogs, you bet your ass I'm petting a dog if I can.

100.)What is your most embarrassing moment? I can't think of anything in particular but I've misspoken more times than I can ever count or remember. Those don't always end the best.

101.) Has anyone really close to you ever died? If so, who was it and how did you handle it? No, the closest was my grandpa but weren't close. I didn't really care...which sounds horrible but I've become desensitized to this stuff

102.)  Describe your plan of action if you were home alone and you heard someone break into your house. Grab my phone and keys and run outside, drive my car up the street and call 911. If I can't get my keys, hide behind a neighbor's house and call 911 from there

103.) If you were to be born again, would you want to be born male or female? Male because being a female kinda sucks. Plus it'd be cool to experience both sides of the equation

104.)  What shampoo do you use? Kirkland. Conditioner too

105.) Guess the meaning of this word: ulotrichous. Atrocious because that's how it sounds (both meanings)

106.) Do you let messages (phone, email, text, social media, etc…) build up, or do you have to look at them right away? Text and email notifications especially make me anxious, I have to look at them, even just so the number goes away. I don't get many texts in the first place though

107.)  Where is the nearest McDonalds to your house? Super close, I've walked there before. (Google maps says 1.1 miles)

108.)  If you had $1 billion and you had to spend it in exactly one week, what would you spend it on? A big house, cars, and as much stuff as I could think of. The rest goes into a bank account. Actually, all of it goes into a bank account

109.) What is the best thing you’ve ever eaten? Those store-bought sugar cookies. There's probably something else but I'm blanking. I've had good sushi before though.

110.) If you could go on a trip around the world with up to three people, who would you bring (they can be people you know personally or famous people). My friend Connor, one celebrity he wants and one I want. Maybe John Mulaney? He's super funny.

111.) What expletive/ explicit phrase do you say most often? Probably hell. The other two main ones make it in a lot too though

112.) What is your personal definition of success? Being happy with where you are in life or your job or whatever, not needing to be further than you are

113.) How was your day today? It's been pretty okay, actually. Nothing tragic has happened yet lol

114.) What is the closest Big City you live by? I'm gonna go BIG city because privacy so of the main four (LA, NYC, Houston, Orlando) in the USA, New York City

115.) Have you ever been in a car accident? No but I hit my mom's car backing out of the driveway and scratched off some paint and dented my car a bit (whoops)

116.) Do you hide anything from your parents? Everything on my phone. Everything.

117.) If you could possess one talent, what would you be able to do? Is having a good memory a talent? Because I want a really good memory. And art abilities.

118.) Ugly and smart or beautiful and stupid? Ugly and smart lol

119.) What is the worst thing you��ve ever seen in real life? When we took a trip to South Carolina there was a massive, 3 inch long spider whose web was next to the front door. I cried.

120.) Use only 3 words to describe how you want your future to go. Happy, rich-ish, comfortable

121.) QUICK! give me a few things a brick could be useful for! Throwing at somebody's head and killing them (wtf me)

122.) If you could make a dream society, describe it in great detail where it would be, who would be in it, and what rules there would be? No discrimination, no crime, everyone happy and nice

123.) If you could make any animal miniature, what would you make and why? A dog because my dog is looking at me right now like she wants a miniature her

124.) What are your favorite candle scents? I don’t use candles, my mom hates open flames. I have burned some vanilla tea candled though

125.) If you HAD to have one plastic surgery, what would you get and why? The bridge of my nose, I'm self-conscious about it because it's lower than it should be as a result of many, many years of glasses. I usually wear contacts now though.

126.) Do you prefer to hang out with the same sex or the opposite sex? I mostly hang out with my same sex friends for long periods and my opposite sex friends for shorter periods. I would have to say opposite ex friends because I'm closer to them.

127.) If you could make a charity, what would the profits go towards? How would you raise money for it? The money would go towards lgbt+ kids and supporting them, especially if they don't get support from their parents or can't tell them. I would raise money through online advertising on sites like Tumblr and Instagram because they tend to have higher lgbt+ populations. Also through popular Youtuber donations if possible.

128.) Describe the body you wish you had. Skinnier, a better smile, less facial hair, blue or green eyes.

129.) If you were a famous director, what would your next movie be about? Describe the plot, characters, and possible title. Something soulmates and m/m. A romance movie, but they're meant to be together because of something (tattoos, colors, etc). They meet and both like each other, but it's only when they realize they're soulmates they confess and fall in love and it's the happy, fluffy masterpiece all Tumblr kids wish existed. (Call Me By Your Name got pretty far though)

130.) If only women were to rule the world, how different would the world be by 2050? More equality, male supremacy protests, everything would probably be better tbh.

131.) What is your favorite alcoholic drink? I'm 16

132.) Do you have a problematic friend? YES and she's not my friend anymore

133.) Are you more spontaneous or more of a planner? Both at the worst moments. I'll plan out my day (which won't work out) and be spontaneous when it comes to tests: "Crap I forgot about that I'll study the bell before" which sometimes actually manages to work.

134.) If you could change your full name, what would your name be? Something with more meaning and better initials

135.) What is one song that describes your life? The Lazy Song by Bruno Mars (there are probably better ones but eh)

136.) What is one show you’ve been meaning to watch but can never find the time for? I've been halfway through Pokemon: XY for over a month

137.) Do you find it easy to drop toxic people from your life that you’ve known for a long time? It depends. If I see them a lot, no. Once I stop seeing someone irl it's too easy for me to drop someone. If they do something really bad and all my friends feel that way then it's super easy

138.) Do you like children? Why or why not? In general yes but I don't want to be around them 24/7 (aka why I like being home alone without my three younger siblings)

139.) What is your zodiac sign? Taurus

140.) Do you like to dance? Do you dance often? In front of other people? No I suck at dancing, but I do rock out to music

141.) Name some of your favorite colors. Grey, black, purple, blue

142.) Have you ever shoplifted? If so, what was it? I've thought about it but no, I haven't

143.) If you could speak three additional languages, what would they be? Spanish, French and some random language I can surprise people with. Like Dutch or something.

144.) Have you ever been in legal trouble? Nope! I'm an innocent child

145.) Have you ever had surgery? No and I hope I never have to

146.) If you could change 2 things about yourself, what would you change and why? My smile and my motivation levels. Smile bc it looks terrible and motivation because I actually need to get stuff done sometimes. And mental health.

147.) What do you want done with your body after you die? Cremation, I guess. I don't want to become a firework or anything

148.) What three physical features do people compliment you most on? What do they say about them? I don't really get compliments; my mom likes my hair though. It's wavy after I shower

149.) If you could have your own business, what would you do? Make things for lazy people that people are surprised that they needed (but actually do need)

150.) What current friend do you have that you’ve known the longest? My friend Amanda, since the start of 6th grade. We're going on 5 years now!

yay now you should try these the original post is here and feel free to ask me any other questions bc i like talking to internet strangers :)

#about me #150 questions #im bored #questions about me #this was fun actually #im gonna do that 3000 questions book too ill post interesting questions from thatr #that #i cant spell #whoops

[pacman-tattoo]

... i hit 1000+?

wow

just...

wow.

i’m gonna be kinda sappy for a moment and say i’ve... never dreamed of hitting 300, let alone somehow manage to get to over 1000 - and i 100% mean that.

heck, i never expected to get more than ten notes on literally anything i’ve written tbh???

i never expected to have the friends that i have now, or the confidence that i’m gaining now when it comes to things like theatre and writing - hell, i was convinced i’d just go and force myself through culinary school and end up in some job that i’d probably end up tolerating rather than loving? hell, the future isn’t certain and who knows if i’ll end up on a stage anywhere - but at least if i do, it’ll be something i love

and just... so many things have changed over the past month and i’m honestly speaking when i say that:  i never expected any of it

so... i guess just... thank you? thank you all for following me and liking my content and talking to me and just... being there, i guess.

im just gonna thank a bunch of ppl because i fuckn love all of u <333333 sorry if stuff gets repetitive idk how many ways i can say ‘I LOVE U THANK U FOR SUPPORT HERE’S A SMOOCH’

to @sincerlyyme and @imdedicatingeverydaytoyou - the two people that actually got me into writing to begin with: thank you. so so fucking much. y’all are so sweet and i absolutely love you two because i never would have actually posted anything if it weren’t for the fact that you two inspired me a ton! plus i might have nearly cried when the two of u followed me so <33333

@earlyjunes @a-second-hand-sorrow @connormurphyobsessed @imagine-boyo @dear-alex-hansen and @huffleheck - the swan fam: I LOVE ALL OF U??? SO MUCH???? swan fam is best fam <3 especially because y’all??? are the sweetest babes???? i love all of u and support all of u and we all should talk more i swear (aka if y’all have discord, swan family discord + swan mama. speaking of swan mama...)

@polygenderselkie - i wasn’t gonna leave u off just put u separately: MY FAVE SWAN MOM <3 thank you for just being a huge influence in my life and being the mom that i’ve kind of needed as of recently tbh? if i’m ever feeling down, i know that you’ll def be there to give swan kisses n sweet words <3

@sarajanesmith42 / @connormurphyisbab: ren i love u so much dude. i’m glad you trusted me and messaged me and i’m glad to talk to you because w o w what a sweetheart??? you’re such a cool dude and i love seeing you happy because it’s such a nice thing tbh? love you a lot, dude <3

@protecting-my-legacy: MACKIE. I LOVE U. ur fics also inspire me a lot and i love your writing and i’m glad we can talk tbh??? uh what else can i say other than i love u and ur a cool babe and just. 10/10 i’m glad we can talk about fics n shit and just???? love u <3333

@waving-at-failed-words: MADDIE I LOVE U BECAUSE WE CAN NOT SLEEP TOGETHER AND IT’S GREAT. thank u for the bird and the sweet things you always put in the tags whenever u reblog my shit <3

@anotherstellarconversation & @luckyadd: u two have to deal with me not sleeping and u deserve an award for that tbh. alex, you’re such a cool bab and u know of my secret love for things and??? i love u a lot??? and lucky - i love ur art and i’m glad we can just talk about random memes n shit and iii am 100% sorry that i never sleep (which is gonna change soon, since... school.........)

@1two-player-game1: elizaaaa. my player one. my amigo. my icon buddy, my pal. i love u a lot tbh??? ur always such a sweetheart and u also have dealt with me not sleeping and u also deserve an award for that i swear 

(these are slowly getting shorter as i realize how many ppl i feel the need to thank jfc sorry babes)

@pleasedontatme​: CAT U COOL NERD I LOVE U AND UR WRITING???? ur poly fics inspire me a lot since.... i love poly fics a lot and they’re rare as far as i know??? love u 

@psychedemigod​: psy. i love u. so much. u make me laugh and u have given me ideas for shit and just??? ur so cool and i jUST RLY LOVE U OK <333 

@yikesjaredkleinman​: adam i love u alot and i’ve literally stayed up waiting for ur writing because its jUST SO GOOD???? UR SUCH A COOL DUDE AND <3333 LOVE U

@twoplayergaymers: i love u and i love talking to u and??? i just love u a lot dude <3333 (plus ur art??? im love <333)

and to two other GIANT NERDS who i love a lot:

@thebirdwitch and @commando-76: jfc how long have we been friends? i love both of you to the ends of the earth and i’m glad we’re all friends still tbh. you two put up with me talking about theatre and my singing and my stressed ranting/venting and your both... still here? which is... really, really weird honestly since i’ve opened up to people before and they’ve ended up leaving me one way or another - which sucks, but... i don’t blame them? i really love both of u and appreciate how much we’ve generally fucked around and our stupid jokes and laughing with you two over the panty raid one night because it was just a fucking stupid thing to say but it was hilarious because we were all tired little shits. love you guys. maybe someday we’ll actually meet face to face? i fucking hope so, honestly.

to anyone i haven’t thanked or ppl that quietly support or ppl that stay on anon: i love you guys too. you’re all always so sweet and i love you all a lot as well. sorry if i left you off this list - i don’t mean anything by it. i love u guys a lot and just <3333

thank you. for everything.

#bean talks #follower milestone

[neglectedrainbow]

If the Tony's was like your suggestions my life would be complete. But apparently on the Tonys soundtrack sincerely, me is on it so it might be the song played. Honestly, if they do play sincerely, me instead of you will be found I might scream but from joy or dissapointment we may never now. Also, on a serious note what songs do you think some of the musicals are going to play?

Awww I’m so glad you enjoyed that post! Thank you!!

So! I’ve been thinking about what DEH will most likely perform. 

Honestly, it’s incredibly, incredibly, incredibly unlikely for them to perform a song that doesn’t feature Ben Platt. So… “Anybody Have a Map?” “Waving Through a Window” “For Forever” “Sincerely, Me” “Requiem” “If I Could Tell Her” “Disappear” “You Will Be Found” “To Break In A Glove” “Only Us” “Good For You” “Words Fail” “So Big/So Small” “Finale” (BUT!!! Because Rachel Bay Jones is also nominated in a very, very important role (and is all-around amazing), I could image them performing “So Big/So Small” if another song featuring Ben singing was performed as well)

Also! Let’s be honest, there’s a -0.8% change they would perform “To Break in a Glove” and any finale song is always unlikely… So. “Anybody Have a Map?” “Waving Through a Window” “For Forever” “Sincerely, Me” “Requiem” “If I Could Tell Her” “Disappear” “You Will Be Found” “To Break In A Glove” “Only Us” “Good For You” “Words Fail” “So Big/So Small” “Finale”

And, while “Waving Through a Window” is an incredible song that I absolutely adore, beyond anything else, and Ben Platt’s performance of it is consistently amazing, it has been performed so many times that it’s unlikely to be heard again. “Anybody Have a Map?” “Waving Through a Window” “For Forever” “Sincerely, Me” “Requiem” “If I Could Tell Her” “Disappear” “You Will Be Found” “To Break In A Glove” “Only Us” “Good For You” “Words Fail” “So Big/So Small” “Finale” (They could do a little brief reprise of it, just because it is so famous)

MOST SHOWS PERFORM SONGS EVERYONE KNOWS AT LEAST A LITTLE, IF NOT THEIR MOST POPULAR SONG (unless they perform more than once, in which case they often do 1 Popular Song Everyone Knows and 1 This Is A Fun Song and/or Really Features Someone’s Talent)

Personally, I think that any of Zoe and Evan’s love songs are also unlikely, as performing such a song could give people the wrong impression about the show (i.e. they could think it’s a love story, which, at the center of it all, it really isn’t) “Anybody Have a Map?” “Waving Through a Window” “For Forever” “Sincerely, Me” “Requiem” “If I Could Tell Her” “Disappear” “You Will Be Found” “To Break In A Glove” “Only Us” “Good For You” “Words Fail” “So Big/So Small” “Finale”

Up until they put “Sincerely, Me” on the Tony soundtrack, I honestly thought there was no chance it would be performed. I love that song, so much, but it really, really doesn’t explain the musical well. If someone hasn’t heard of the musical, “Sincerely, Me” being their first introduction to it wouldn’t really give the musical what it deserves, in my opinion. While I love that song so, so, so much, I don’t think it should be what they perform. I love it, I really do, but it doesn’t encapsulate what the show is about and is actually pretty confusing if you don’t know the storyline.

So, “Anybody Have a Map?” “Waving Through a Window” “For Forever” “Sincerely, Me” “Requiem” “If I Could Tell Her” “Disappear” “You Will Be Found” “To Break In A Glove” “Only Us” “Good For You” “Words Fail” “So Big/So Small” “Finale”

It’s uncommon for shows to do a song that is The Emotional Highpoint. (The Color Purple did so with their performance of “I’m Here”, but that’s uncommon). This, I believe, was because of the amount of press and love Cynthia Erivo’s performance was given, and their marketing was greatly focused on her performance. For these reasons, I believe that it is genuinely possible for Ben to perform “Words Fail.” Instantly, after seeing that song live, everyone can agree fully and completely on Ben’s overwhelming talent and abilities. It’s such a beautiful and stunning song, but, I worry, out of context, it could be lost. (Preferably, I would love them to perform “Words Fail” and then “So Big/So Small” because Tears Angst Love Wow Nice Good Talent Sh00k).

I would be completely content with “For Forever” (Ben has performed that before, but I don’t think it’s completely out of the running).

TBH, “You Will Be Found” (perhaps with a bit of “Disappear” at the beginning) is the most likely. It’s a moving song. It features the whole cast. It shows what the show’s really about (mental health/mental illness) and the amazing talent of the show cast. If they perform “You Will Be Found”, I would like for them to include Ben’s monologue beforehand. 

Think about how powerful that would be. He gets up on stage, starting his speech, “Hello students and faculty,” looking out at the Tony’s audience, completely in character. Then, he drops the cards, the room is silent, everyone instantly is pulled into this show, because Damn that’s amazing acting right there. Then, the song starts, with solos from Ben and Mike, then the whole cast as well. It’s the most reasonable choice, I think. (And I cry every time I listen to that song nbd)

I hope, though, that the DEH cast gets to perform “Sincerely, Me” at another, less serious event (like Fun Home did with “Come to the Fun Home”), but I don’t think it’s the best choice for the Tony Awards. SO!!!!! 

My personal preference would be “Words Fail” with “So Big/So Small” mainly because I want an HQ version of those songs to watch over and over and over and over. My logical belief is that they’ll do something involving “You Will Be Found”.

#this was so long i'm sorry iomfg #long post #did not mean to make it that long #analysis #my analysis #text #txt #long #scroll #tony #tony's #tony awards #tony nominations #tony's 2017 #tony 2017 #tony awards 2017 #tony nominations 2017 #my post #my content #i wrote this #deh #dearevanhansen #dear evan hansen

[gukiee]

So??? Wow? I can’t even believe I’m able to make this because where the heck did you all come from so quickly?? I’ve only made this account a couple months ago and the amount of followers I’ve gained in such a short amount of time has really? Blown my mind I don’t know how I ever came to deserve you guys. I’ve made so many friends and had such lovely interactions with you guys I will never begin to explain how thankful I am for you all. You guys really do help get me up in the morning and whenever I’m sad you guys always lift me up so high my heart is so warm for you all. 

I really really want to thank everyone who has ever interacted with me, sent me asks, reblogged my content, asked me for advice, given me advice, tagged me in posts, and so on. It’s not even about the numbers honestly, although this is a goal of mine and I am really shocked how quickly it came about, it’s really more about each individual person. You guys are all so sweet and kind to me and I know there’s lots of negative things people say about ARMY’s I have to say that you guys have not let me down at all. I won’t lie I pre wrote a lot of this last night but I came back and edited it and added this because my heart is really pounding so hard now that it’s real and I just??😭😭😭  LOVE you guys wow okay. I know the list isn’t that long, but I put a lot of careful thought into it and wanted it to be a bit more intimate and special. Even if you’re not on this list, I still love you and appreciate you just as much!!!

SO that being said!! 

Bolded: Mutuals 💖: You have a special place in my heart ☀️: We don’t talk (much/at all) but you’re my favourite 👀 : I wish we spoke more 💌: There’s a message for you under the read more (sorry in advance)

A-G

|  @ask-bts-stuff💌☀️  | @apgujeon  |  @bangtanhmu  |  @chimchams  |  @damn-hoseok💖💌  |  @floral-hobi💖💌☀️ 👀  |  @fullofloveforeveryone​💖💌  |  @gukks |

H-O

|  @havesometae​💖 💌☀️  |  @hob-e​☀️ 💌: | ​ @hobiswife​  | @hobuing  |  @jeondiary​  |  @jeonify​ |  @jungkookio​  |  @junqkookied​💖💌👀☀️  |  @jiminzinho​  | @mylifeiskpoptrash​💖💌👀☀️

P-#

|  @pingkeujin 💖💌  |  @rosytaes  |  @sweaterpawsjimin  |  @taekookiesandcream 💖💌  |  @whyparkjimin  |  @yoongsins 💌☀️ 👀  |  @yoonmin-smile 💖💌  |  @02tae 💖💌☀️ 👀

Messages: 

@ask-bts-stuff: I don’t really have much to say here I just wanted to let you know how amazing and adorable your art is. Whenever I’m really down I always look at your blog and it cheers me right up. 

@damn-hoseok: My angel😭 You were the first person I spoke to when i created this blog and we clicked instantly. I’m forever thankful that you were my first friend on here. I appreciate all the jokes we share, and staying up/getting up early to watch award shows together while we live react to them. You’re always the person who keeps me informed of new things that are happening and always have links and sources when I need it so I can’t thank you enough for that because I’m?? A disaster. I appreciate and love you to no end and I’m so thankful you’re back from your trip safely I was very stressed out for a month. 

@floral-hobi: Dani♡ Even though we don’t talk much (because I’m shy and awkward lmfao) I will forever appreciate the conversations we DO share and all the times you tag me in pictures of guk. You’re one of my favourite blogs and you’re honestly such a sweetheart.

@fullofloveforeveryone: Soli you are my sun, my flowers, my clouds. You were another one of the first friends I made on here and we got very close quickly. You’re like a little sister to me. I’ll never be able to thank you enough for being there when I’ve had panic attacks or when I’ve been stressed out. I know i’ve been really busy with school and we haven’t spoken as much because we’ve both had things going on but I want you to know how much I really love and care about you. I will always be here for you no matter what. When we laugh, we laugh really hard, and when I’m sad you always know how to bring me up. You’re like a breath of fresh air and my appreciation for you is boundless. 

@havesometae: Even though we don’t speak much, I think you are the cutest sweetest thing ever. You always supported my writing and any new content I created, always messaging me after to give me your feedback and make me feel better when I was unsure. Your writing has been improving lots and I’m really so so so proud of you. If you ever need help with anything please don’t hesitate to ask. Whenever I was creating new content it was always you who kept me motivated so I thank you for that!

@hob-e: Even though we’ve barely spoken, I think you are really so pretty inside and out. Your love for hobi and your kindness for others really shines through your blog and I always find such great pleasure visiting your blog if I’m stressed out or upset. You’re easily one of my biggest tumblr crushes and although we’ve barely interacted I still? Care about you a lot sdfgh and think you’re really great!!! So never change for anyone!!!!

@junqkookied: MIA. I don’t even know where to start. Whenever we talk my stomach twists in knots a bit because I find you so fantastic and sweet and amazing and I honestly want nothing more than your happiness. I will never be able to thank you enough for sitting down with me and answering all my questions about making gifs or colouring or even just life stuff. You’re always so encouraging when I’m not sure of myself and never make me feel bad when I ask you stupid questions. I miss you all the time and wish I could give you a really big hug sometimes. You’re another person who was one of my first friends on here and I care about you more than the world. I’m always here for you if you need anything I hope you know that. 

@mylifeiskpoptrash: I know we don’t speak much (which is mostly my fault because school is kicking my butt) I want you to know that your strength and kindness is really inspiring to me. You always offer to listen to me when I’m down even if you have your own personal stuff going on. You put everyone before yourself and are sosososo sweet my heart is so warm for you. Thank you for being there for me and keeping me company when I’m lonely!

@pingkeujin: Sissi ♡♡♡♡♡♡ You’re one of the people I talk to every single day. I love our stupid snapchat conversations, whether it be over life stuff, asking each other for advice or encouragement, or just sending stupid pictures with filters. I’m so thankful I have someone who shares my adoration for vmin and yoonseok lmfao. I really love the relationship we have where we can talk to each other about serious stuff or our interests, but also 99% of the time we’re sending each other funny videos or memes. I always look to you for reassurance with my content or work when I’m unsure because your input means a lot to me and I really value your opinion. I look up to you a lot. I hope that, because we live relatively close, we will be able to meet up one day♡ 

@taekookiesandcream: Nakita... the ki to my ki... my kiki soul mate...... We haven’t been talking long but I always get really excited when I see you in my messages. You’re so lovely to talk to and our conversations are always so refreshing even if we’re not talking about anything important. I’m glad you decided to show me what your silver hair looks like because if you hadn’t we wouldn’t be friends. You’re very kind and gentle hearted and I really appreciate that about you. You’re so positive all the time and you really are my sunshine. 

@yoongsins: Your art is honestly so amazing, I’m forever thankful I commissioned you for my icon and I will continue to commission you for such in the future! We brief conversations and interactions we have, and I honestly wish we had more! We have so much in common and I think we get along really great. I forever admire how much hard work you put into your art and designs because they’re honestly so beautiful and you’re easily one of my favourite artists on here. Please continue to work hard and be passionate and do what you love! 

@yoonmin-smile: God dfhsdsghkjdsj I don’t even know what to write here tbh... I don’t know where to start. Okay. Well, firstly I’m really thankful that you messed up sending me an ask and forgot to click anon. I was having a really bad day that day (probably one of the badder days I’ve had in a while) and you were so kind and soft to me and listened to all of my concerns and gave me advice even though we had never interacted before. We clicked automatically and have become so close so quickly it’s unbelievable. You’re one person I speak to every day. Before I’m even awake in the morning I make sure to check my messages to see what you had to say before anything else because I know you probably sent me a rude guk gif or something sweet for me to wake up to. I appreciate our gif wars. You always remind me to eat well and go to bed early and make sure my homework is done, which is something I’m so thankful for. You’re seriously my big sister and I come to you for everything. Sometimes I talk to you more than my actual big sister. Thank you for sending me pictures and gifs and tagging me in stuff it always makes my day a bit brighter. I love you literally to death and would probably do anything for you. Please never be afraid or embarrassed to open up to me or come to me about things I’ll always be here for you no matter what. 

@02tae: Carly... my aesthetics princess sdfghj. You and your blog are ? So pretty my heart always beats a little faster when I see you’ve messaged me or tagged me in stuff (which thank you for doing by the way I always appreciate it so much!!!). Although we don’t talk much (again, because I’m really shy and I think you’re super great and it makes me super nervous to talk to you gfdhjf) I really do love every second we interact with each other. Even the moments we’re not interacting and you just so happen to show up on my dash I always get really excited. You’re so sweet and soft and make my heart so warm and I’m really thankful for you! Please never change I love you lots!!!!

Okay well!!!!! My hand is gonna fall off and my heart is bursting with how much I love my mutuals, followers, or even just the blogs I follow and like a lot. Thank you all for everything♡ Thank you all for putting up with my rants lmfaooo. You guys always give me the most beautiful moment(s) in life. I love you!!!!

#ff #personal #not bts #follow forever #THIS WAS ridiculously long i am so sorry

[voldiebuns]

Oscars 2018

The Oscars are tonight, who's excited?? I don't tend to watch them except vicariously through tumblr, but I'm actually planning to watch live tonight. Part of it is that I feel like there's a lot of really good films nominated this year, part of it is that I've been getting more interested in the film industry as a whole. Plus my favorite podcast had a great episode about the nominations, plus several about individual nominees (Call Me by Your Name, Phantom Thread, The Post, The Shape of Water, Star Wars: The Last Jedi, and various others). I sort of challenged myself to watch as many of the nominations as possible before the Oscars, though as there are iirc 69 things nominated, I knew I wouldn't get through them all. I do think I watched more than most years though, with a total of 7. Which doesn't seem like a lot, but I'm pretty sure I saw like 3 last year lol Most of them I even saw in theaters since I've been watching a lot more in theaters lately. (I will squee about MoviePass in another post sometime lol) I'll likely be liveblogging on my “Oscars 2018″ tag, so feel free to watch me be completely wrong in real time! Which is in not much time at all, wow this post took a long time to do...

Under the cut is my list of watched nominees plus short reviews, and my predictions.

Nominee Reviews

Beauty and the Beast I really only went to see this movie bc my friend had an extra ticket and I was her third string option lol I don't particularly care for Disney films in general and hadn't seen anything to interest me from the previews. I was unexcited about seeing it, and I remained underwhelmed lol I had a myriad of problems with it, from bad costume design (Belle's dress was just so so bad) to uncanny valley CGI (Cogsworth and Lumiere esp) to general boringness (not that that's entirely the fault of the adaption, since it's well, an adaption, but they didn't do anything to help). The only redeeming feature was Gaston and LeFou, both of whom I did really enjoy overall, and I even have complaints about that! Mostly that there was all the hullabaloo about "gay content, le gasp" and there was... none. One split second same sex dance does not gay content make imo. That is paltry rep and I'm not satisfied with that anymore tbh. The Breadwinner I just watched this last week when I happened upon it on Netflix, and I'm so glad I did. It was a beautiful movie, and so so heartwarming/heartbreaking. I was legit crying by the end. The story was wonderful, as was the animation. I tend to do other things on the computer when I watch movies, but I really got sucked into watching. I'm disappointed it didn't get more attention, but I really do highly recommend it. Get Out Just saw this one recently as well after hearing so many good things about it. All of which were certainly deserved. My horror movie experience is not terribly deep, but this was one of the best I've seen. It was so clever and so well acted, it's kind of amazing that Jordan Peele put out such a fantastic movie for his directorial debut. I actually watched Scream, which Get Out has been compared to a lot, on the same day, and tbh this was a much better and more intellectual film. Highly recommended. The Greatest Showman This is actually the only one I've seen twice (so far). I expected to like it since Hugh Jackman and musicals are two of my favorite things, but I liked it so much more than I even expected. Even on my second watch, I was on the edge of my seat for the suspenseful bits and crying for the angsty ones. The acting and singing was fantastic, as was the storyline. I know it deviates a lot from what actually happened, but honestly this movie was so heartwarming and beautiful that I don't even care. My only complaint is that there's been so little attention on the secondary characters, bc I found them so so fascinating! Logan Saw this one the other day after meaning to watch it since it came out. I was... disappointed tbh. I found the plot kind of stiff and confusing, and the acting for the most part was not particularly memorable. I'd heard a lot of good things about this, but I really didn't care for it. Definitely not one of the better XMCU films imo. The Shape of Water If you follow me on tumblr, you may have seen that I was like desperate to see this since I'm a huge del Toro fangirl, and I was really pissed that it took so long to come out where I am. But I finally got to see it and it was just as wonderful as I'd expected!! My only disappointment is that we didn't get to actually see any fish dick lol But seriously, this was a supremely beautiful movie with fantastic acting and fantastic characters. I think that's one of the things I liked best about it, that each of the characters was so distinct and so compelling. Like I had a really visceral reaction to the fingers scene (you should know what I mean if you've seen it...). I was so impressed by that, that the writing and the acting gave such life and depth to the characters and their stories. I was really just enthralled the whole way through <3 Star Wars: The Last Jedi And if you follow me on tumblr, you also know that I hated this movie lol Which was actually really disappointing, bc The Force Awakens was really good and I think that movie set up a really good start for this trilogy. Unfortunately, I don't think TLJ followed through with any of the interesting plotlines that had been set up. Mostly, this felt like an entirely pointless movie to me. It didn't move the plot forward at all really, and I felt it even went backwards (or sideways) on a lot of things. The characters were dull and many of their storylines (esp Finn, which was esp disappointing) didn't really go anywhere or ended up being totally superflous imo. I felt like Rian Johnson was more interesting in making a movie that would get him attention than in making a good Star Wars movie. It feels like just another mediocre white male director being handed the helm of a big franchise and fucking it up bc they have no respect for the franchise or its fans. Honestly, this movie was just so bad that I've lost almost all interest in Star Wars :/

Predictions

Best Picture: The Shape of Water It's gotten so much critical aclaim and already won so many awards, I feel pretty confident in this one. I would not be salty about Get Out winning instead, but although it got pretty great critical acalaim as well, I still think the Academy is still too racist, plus the fact that it's a horror movie, which is not a genre that is generally seen as legitimate in awards circles. Lead Actor: Gary Oldman, “Darkest Hour” I had no interest in Darkest Hour since I hate war films, but everyone seems to love Gary Oldman in it. I don't necessarily think it's a deserved win compared to some of the other nominations, but I do think it's the likeliest. Lead Actress: Meryl Streep, “The Post” It's fucking Merly Streep, is there more that needs to be said? Supporting Actor: Woody Harrelson, “Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri” I don't even know what this movie is about, but ppl seem to be loving it so... Supporting Actress: Lesley Manville, “Phantom Thread” By all accounts a fantastic movie and a fantastic actress, though I haven't had a chance to watch it yet. Director: “The Shape of Water,” Guillermo del Toro No contest, really, since he's won all (or at least most?) of the other best director awards for the year. And I mean, he's my favorite director, so I'm certainly not mad lol Animated Feature: “Coco,” Lee Unkrich, Darla K. Anderson I abolutely think The Breadwinner or Loving Vincent deserves it more, but I think this is one of the categories where most of the voters will not have watched the movies and it's a Disney movie, so of course it will win. Animated Short: “Revolting Rhymes,” Jakob Schuh, Jan Lachauer Since it's the only one I've even seen anything about lol Adapted Screenplay: “Call Me by Your Name,” James Ivory The only other one I think that has a chance in this category is The Disaster Artist, honestly. And I think that Call Me by Your Name is such an arty film gives it the boost. Original Screenplay: "The Shape of Water,” Guillermo del Toro, Vanessa Taylor Lady Bird and Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri have good chances here, too, but again, The Shape of Water has gotten so much acclaim. Cinematography: “Blade Runner 2049,” Roger Deakins Bc apparently Blade Runner is the epitomy of cyberpunk. Which is bullshit and The Shape of Water deserves it more but whatever. Best Documentary Feature: “Icarus,” Bryan Fogel, Dan Cogan Really I think it could go to any of them fairly equally, so it's more of a tossup imo. Best Documentary Short Subject: “Heroin(e),” Elaine McMillion Sheldon, Kerrin Sheldon Again, only one I've heard anything about in the category. Best Live Action Short Film: ? I literally have heard nothing so who knows! Best Foreign Language Film: “Loveless” (Russia) Yet again, only one I've heard anything about. Film Editing: “The Shape of Water,” Sidney Wolinsky I think this one's a bit of a free for all, so I just think The Shape of Water should get it lol Sound Editing: “Baby Driver,” Julian Slater Since this is basically the entire draw of Baby Drive afaik. Sound Mixing: “Star Wars: The Last Jedi,” Stuart Wilson, Ren Klyce, David Parker, Michael Semanick I don't think it's deserved tbh, but I think it's most likely. Production Design: “Beauty and the Beast,” Sarah Greenwood; Katie Spencer Again, definitely not deserved, but everyone went googoo over it's overall shitty production design so. Original Score: “Phantom Thread,” Jonny Greenwood I certainly wouldn't be mad if The Shape of Water won instead, but from what I've seen and heard, I think Phantom Thread has a really good chance. Original Song: “This Is Me” from “The Greatest Showman,” Benj Pasek, Justin Paul Really not sure whose going to actually win, but I really really think The Greatest Showman deserves it most. This Is Me is a spectacular song. Really, the whole soundtrack was amazing. Makeup and Hair: “Victoria and Abdul,” Daniel Phillips and Lou Sheppard Really the only choice out of the nominees. Costume Design: “Phantom Thread,” Mark Bridges I mean, it's basically what the movie is about, so it should win. Beaty and the Beast is the most likely other choice since it got a lot of attention when it came out, though I found the costume design there appaling. Visual Effects: “Star Wars: The Last Jedi,” Ben Morris, Mike Mulholland, Chris Corbould, Neal ScanlanIt's a tossup between Star Wars and Blade Runner 2049, but I think the greater nostalgia will win out. Who actually deserves it? Fuck if I know.

#Oscars 2018 #posted this on lj earlier so thought I might as well post it here too lol