#to the point i feel bad about the thing i was very very excited to be working on for myself

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for telling my dad to let out his emotions?

(cw: this entire post is about animal death)

Long story short, my dad (58M) has wanted a dog for decades. My mom (54F) has been refusing a dog for all 25 years they've been together. A few years ago, she finally agreed to get a puppy, and my dad was more excited than I've ever seen him be for anything.

Our dog passed away from a tumor a few months ago. He wasn't even three years old. This practically destroyed all of us, especially my dad, since he'd fought so hard for a dog for years. On top of that, he hasn't had much of a chance to let out his emotions since my mom keeps stopping him, and also making it worse.

A couple of weeks ago, on the way home from a party, something reminded my dad of the dog, and he started to cry in the car. We all comforted him, but after a few minutes my mom rolled her eyes and told him to stop crying. When we got home, my dad apologized for getting emotional. I (18M) told him he didn't have to apologize, since crying in grief is a completely normal thing to do. My mom told me I shouldn't say that, since he would just "wallow in his sadness all night" and it was better to just tell him not to do that.

I was baffled by this. I realized that she wasn't trying to make him feel better, she just didn't want to deal with him crying anymore. (I also recently noticed that she does the same thing to my sister (14F) and I.) Apparently this has been going on for pretty much their entire marriage of ~20 years.

On top of all of that, my mom brings up the topic of our dog and his death to people at Every. Single. Opportunity. And it always makes the rest of us feel like shit. She ordered a custom portrait of our dog as a Father's Day present for my dad. When I implied that this might be a bad idea, she said "So you hate it. Great." She also wants another dog exactly like our old one, despite the fact that he was a purebred, and had some health problems because of it. At this point, she wouldn't shock me if she said she wanted to clone the poor dog.

My dad has struggled with depression for years. He lived a very difficult life growing up, and was basically taught that showing sadness or fear was weak. Throughout my life, though, he's always made sure to tell my sister and I that he never wants us to have to bottle up how we feel and that the "boys don't cry" attitude is stupid.

So you can imagine my surprise when I tried to comfort him earlier tonight and he said "No, no, I'm fine. Boys don't cry. Don't worry about me." After that, my parents got into an argument about my mom telling my dad that he needs to "move past this".

TLDR: My mom keeps doing things that remind my dad of our dead dog, but then when he gets overwhelmed and starts crying she tells him to stop because she doesn't want to deal with his crying. AITA for telling my dad that she's wrong?

#aita #am i the asshole #pet death cw

[peachhcs]

jealousy, jealousy

hughes!sister x will smith au (samy + will)

will does a bit of stalking on his burner account

1.7k words

here's a bit of will's groveling while talking with the guys from back home. if i had a burner account, i would also stalk my ex on it, so will's kind of real for that haha

au masterlist

will's eyes glued themselves to his phone screen. he didn't mean to click into samy's account, but one thing led to another and his fingers just typed away the password to his burner account that the girl had no idea he had so he wasn't blocked there.

he just needed to look. a check-in? what sounded better than calling it plain stalking? at least gabe and ryan weren't there to peer over the boy's shoulder and chirp on him for stalking his ex.

the boy's fingers slid through her profile. he hadn't seen it in awhile, so when he saw four new posts in her feed since the last time he looked, he was immediately tapping into them. will's gaze slid over every single photo.

samy's smile was wide and bright as she stood with hannah and their other friends. even her soccer photos captured her large smile and seeing it made will smile back. he always loved seeing her love soccer as much as she did.

the blonde scrolled until he stumbled onto a photo in one of her recent posts. the fourth picture out of the ten in the set was of samy standing very close to a guy will didn't quite recognize. his arm was wrapped around her waist and something in will pinched.

that feeling—one he had so long ago he hardly remembered it—started resurfacing the longer he stared at the photo. memories of samy's senior homecoming flashed in will's mind while he compared her date to the guy in this photo.

who the fuck was this guy? luckily, he was tagged, so will went to his account. it was public.

upon further inspection, the guy was their age, a soccer player for the men's team, and worst of all he had a similar photo of him and samy on his account too. actually, the brunette was in his feed twice.

they looked really close. too close.

will scoffed. the guy wasn't even that good looking. plus, he so wasn't samy's type. the boy clicked back into her account to inspect the rest of the photos.

for some reason he couldn't believe how happy she looked as if they didn't break up. she looked like nothing even happened, but that was how will looked too. at least he tried to.

suddenly, the boy's phone buzzed in his hand. gabe's name flashed across the screen and a smile appeared on the blonde's lips as she slid to answer the call. his friend's face quickly appeared.

"hey, did i catch you at a bad time?" gabe wondered when he connected.

"no, no. i'm in my room," the blonde chuckled.

"okay, good. ry and drew are with me too. they wanted to say hi," the dark-haired boy pointed his laptop towards the other boys who waved.

"hey smitty!"

"yooo, what's up!"

will smiled widely at their hello's, "hey, it's good to see you guys again."

"we miss you a lot here. it's not the same without our other guy," drew cut in.

"i miss you guys too. it doesn't feel the same not playing on the same team anymore," the blonde hummed a bit sadly.

that was the hardest thing about all of this. on top of going through a breakup, will's best friends weren't around to help him through it. he only saw them through a screen now.

"you start soon, right? in a week?" ryan wondered as him and drew sat behind gabe in what must've been one of their rooms or something. 

"yeah, i make my debut at the game next week," will nodded, excitement filling his system at that. he's waited since he was a kid to finally take the ice as an official nhl player and knowing that day was finally a week away didn't quite feel real. 

"dude, you're gonna be awesome. i wish we could be there to see it," gabe frowned a bit which made will frown again. 

"i wish you guys were here, too. how's boston been? the same?" 

"yeah, pretty much. tailgates, parties, practice, you know. the usual," drew commented earning small eye rolls from gabe and ryan. 

"mostly practice. coach wants us working extra hard this year after last season," ryan cut in and the blonde nodded. he figured coach would get on the team harder this season after they lost the ncaa finals without scoring any points. 

"what've you been doing though? are the guys cool?" gabe changed the subject. 

"oh, they're great. they've been showing me around the area and i think i'll really like it," the boy nodded. he felt content and the people on the team seemed like good guys, so he knew he was in good hands. 

there was just a few things missing. 

"met any girls?" drew teased with a large smirk. 

will's expression faltered while gabe and ryan glared in the other boy's direction. they didn't hound will as much about the whole breakup anymore, but the subject was still touchy and they knew for a fact will wasn't ready to meet other people yet. 

"dude," ryan mumbled, but will still heard him through the call. 

"uh, no. i haven't, but it's fine," the blonde offered a tight-lipped smile. the other three studied their friend for a moment, trying to decide if he was being truthful or not. 

samy's name wasn't one that came up a lot around them anymore when will was in conversation. they knew he didn't wanna talk about her, so they tried keeping her name out of their mouths as much as possible. they never even told him she visited last weekend to see them for their first home game of the season not knowing how that'd make will feel, but gabe decided to try his luck today with the topic. 

"uh, samy was up last weekend. she came and saw us for the first home game of the season," the dark-haired boy informed. he studied his friend's face for a reaction, worried that will would get mad or something. 

"oh, she did?" was all will said. 

"yeah, it was really nice of her. she was pretty excited for us. we took her out for dinner and everything, too," gabe smiled a bit. 

"that's cool. i'm glad she..she went out," will nodded while a part of him twisted. 

he knew the guys were still her friend, he just never really thought that she'd actually fly out to see them still when he wasn't there. plus, none of them even said anything to him about it last weekend. there wasn't even a story post about her being there. will knew his friends loved him, but did they really think they needed to hide whenever they were hanging out with his ex so he didn't know? 

"she asked about you..or well..we started talking about you a bit and she asked about you," ryan hummed making the blonde's ears perk up. 

"what did she say?" 

"just asked how you were. we said you were good. settled into san jose. she said she's glad you're doing good," ryan continued. hearing all of that made will's stomach continue twisting. of course she was glad he was doing good even when he (stupidly) broke her heart. 

"i haven't talked to her. i don't think she'd wanna talk to me anyway," will laughed dryly. 

"i'm sure she does if she asked how you were doing. she's not that heartless, will," drew chuckled some. the blonde could only manage a weak smile in response. 

"do you know if she's like..talking to anyone or anything?" will tried asking casually so it wouldn't seem like he was stalking her account and so the guys didn't know he resorted to the burner account to look her up. 

"uh..not really. i think she's just going on random dates. nothing serious," gabe shrugged. 

"so she is seeing people though?" 

when gabe nodded will felt his heart sink. he figured she probably would, but hearing it aloud hurt even more than he thought. 

"why do you ask?" ryan wondered, eyebrows raised. 

"no reason. i was just curious," the blonde attempted to play off his disappointment. 

"were you stalking her account?" gabe said because he knew his best friend well, even through a screen. the boy knew about the burner account because he saw it on will's phone a few months back when he caught him stalking samy's account too. 

"no." 

"will." 

"okay, maybe i was," the blonde rolled his eyes. 

"i thought she blocked you?" drew raised his eyebrow. 

"she did..i was just looking on my burner account," will admitted, embarrassment coating his expression. 

"oh boy," ryan muttered like he was unimpressed, yet he knew will would do something like this. 

"oh, come on. give me a break. it's not stalking. i was just..checking in?" 

"i think you should reach out to her. see how she is?" gabe cut in before ryan began arguing with him. 

"i told you, she doesn't wanna talk to me. she said she never wanted to see me ever again, so i doubt she'd want me to randomly text her. i'm probably blocked anyway," will mumbled knowing he definitely was because he actually did try and reach out to her about a month ago. his text went green, so that was a clear indication his number was blocked on her phone. 

"well, i hope you know she does wanna see you again even if she won't say it. i know she still thinks about you because she wears her charm bracelet and she's always stroking the shark charm i'm guessing you have her?" gabe raised his eyebrow. 

will immediately thought back to his farewell party where he talked a bit with mrs. hughes. the envelope had sat in his pocket all day deciding if he should find samy and give it to her before deciding it was probably better to have her mom give it to her instead. he didn't even know if samy would want it, so hearing that it was on her charm bracelet was a surprise. 

"i wouldn't think she doesn't want to see or talk to you too fast, will. you guys have history. you're like family. we're rooting for you guys," ryan said with a soft smile. 

the hockey player hummed, swiping out of the facetime to go back to samy's instagram. after another sweep of her recent posts, he did notice the charm bracelet sitting on her wrist. all of the charms were still there, even the ones he gifted her since she's had it. a soft smile spread across will's lips when he caught sight of the shark one. 

#will smith hockey #hughes!sister x will smith au #samy x will #samy hughes #boston college hockey #boston college #will smith x oc #will smith imagine #uofmichigan #umich hockey #bc eagles #bc hockey #san jose sharks #sjs #ws6 #will smith hockey angst #umich wolverines #gabe perreault #ryan leonard #drew fortescue #boston college hockey imagine #boston college imagine #boston college hockey blurb

[fakescenariosbeforesleepblog]

The strongest shape.

Ghost x Reader (y/n) x Soap.

Corporal Y/N Sanderson, alias Kamikaze. Yes, you're the young sibling of Gary 'Roach' Sanderson, you loved your brother, he was the best, you learned a lot from him, that's how you ended up in the army to feel a connection with your brother again. But you weren't expecting to find love on the way.

Warning: long and perhaps a bad story, the images are not mine, includes a lot of grammatical and spelling errors. I'm trying to not make much specific description of the reader but I apologize if it's too much.

Anyway, if you like the story don't forget to leave a ❤️, I hope to not write too many parts of this one because I feel like I'm not good doing them also I always disappoint you with my endings, but enjoy it.

Btw, Pt.2 is ready.

You and a few members from your unit were selected to train with the British special forces, you couldn't feel more excited, just like your brother before you, you would be where he was and you somehow would feel close to him again.

Captain Price and his team would be with you and your teammates, training you.

- (...) So, these American guys will be here at any time, let's show them how things work here. They said they selected members with high potential, so let's take them to their limits, alright?

«Yes, Captain!»

- Good, let's go for them.

Meanwhile, you and your comrades were waiting outside of the building, those were the orders, probably the training would start right there, no wasting time.

Your teammates, some of them younger than you, are still rookies without much discipline, you're still learning as much as them, but you know when and where to lose control, but being surrounded by all that youth makes you feel wild. Also your friend, Foxy, loves to presume about your talents.

- Come on Kamikaze, teach these boys how to climb a building.

- I don't think it is the right time Foxy...

«Do it!» «Come on, show us how to do it!» « GO, GO, GO, GO...!!»

Everybody yells and dares you to do it, so without thinking too much you run and start to climb the building in front of you easily, you're accustomed to these activities, you climb all the time, since you and your brother were kids, in your teenage years you learned some Parkour so it was easy, you arrive to the top quickly, some other soldiers tried to imitate and follow your steps but you were fastest, suddenly a group of four men came out of the principal door of the building, the rest of your comrades stopped to yell and formed a line, like a group of scared children avoiding the looks of those men.

- Nothing like the first impression.

One of them said, none of the young team spoke, all of them quiet, while you and the other soldiers who tried to climb with you were still in the building.

- 3... 5... Where are the rest?

Another asked and still, no one dares to respond.

- Are you deaf? The captain made you a question!

Finally, Foxy, gives a step and simply points at the building. The captain follows your friend's pointing finger. There you were, the only soldier who arrived at the top, some others are in the middle of the way. At this point you think you will be sent back home, the look of your new Captain is not very hopeful.

- Tell them to come back here, now.

Foxy quickly approaches the building and yells «Come back now! Quick!»

You don't hesitate, jumping and climbing once again to go down, you land first, your teammates took their time as if they weren't worried about losing this opportunity.

You walk directly to the line, standing at Foxy's side, you're looking at your boots trying to not look at the men in front of you.

«We don't have the entire bloody day! Hurry up!»

Finally the rest was in the line with all of you.

- Who started this?

You decided to be brave and look at your new superiors. A man with a skull mask was asking who started that silly game, you're regretting not thinking about it twice.

Once again, Foxy gives a step and firmly accepts the fault.

- It was me, Sir.

- May I ask why?

- My teammates were trying to compete between them to kill time while we were waiting, so I pushed my friend Kamikaze to stop their silly game, it was my fault, Sir. I wanted to presume about Y/N's skills.

The masked giant didn't say a word, it was the captain who spoke this time.

- Discipline is important here, following orders can be vital for your survival on the battlefield. So next time i suggest you think twice before breaking the rules or disobeying your orders.

«YES, SIR»

- Now, I'm the Captain, John Price. And these men are my team, Lt. Ghost, Sergeant Gaz, and over there is Soap. We will be working with all of you. There's no need to introduce yourself just tell me your last names quickly.

«James, McAvoy, McCarthy, Black, Rivers, Blackwood, Clearwater, McNabb, Sanderson»

- Good, nice to meet y'all, now... Black, James and Blackwood, don't unpack your stuff, you lose your chances. Go back home.

Just like that, the young boys who lazily climbed down with you lose their opportunity to work with such a team. And as the young soldiers were, all of them started to complain and beg for a last opportunity, you were at the edge to faint, it could be you too, but somehow the captain had mercy on you, you live to see another day in this place. Moments later, before you could relax, Ghost, the man with the mask, talks to you.

- Sanderson.

- Yes... sir.

- Like... Gary Sanderson?

- Indeed, he was my brother, Sir.

- That explains a lot.

That's all he says, he walks to his comrades while the captain is pretending to listen to the poor complaints and explanations of the now excluded soldiers.

You froze on the line with the rest, but you can see the looks of Soap and Ghost. They're definitely talking about you.

From the moment you appeared on his view, Ghost thought you looked familiar, but he wasn't sure why, you were beautiful that's the first thing he thought about you. He quickly tried to eliminate that from his mind, you were clearly undisciplined, just like young people is, yes, that's how he tried to replace his thoughts about your beauty, then he said to himself maybe he was judging you wrong, he met you just a few seconds ago and was already labelled you.

He was debating with himself when a familiar last name that he hadn't heard in a while caught his attention «Sanderson» he quickly looked at the direction where he heard that name, you. Finally, he understands why you looked very familiar to him, but it could be a coincidence though, before he could considerate what to do, he discovered himself talking to you, his suspicions were ventilated, Roach and you are family. That explains your ability, now he wonders what else you and Roach have in common.

On the other hand, Soap, had the same feeling about you, when he saw you at the top of the building, the first thought he had was about Roach and the memories he shared with your brother, he was absorbed by his thoughts when Ghost brought him back to the moment.

- Did you hear that? Roach's sibling.

- What? Are you serious?

- Yes, looks like a troublemaker though, but also reminds me a lot of him.

Soap nods in silence, observing you, you're younger than them, but certainly you look like your sibling, Roach lives in Soap's memory, he always thinks about him, he was a good soldier, but also a great man and friend, he feels like you will be pretty much the same, except that you're extremely gorgeous, your body shape is a blessing for his eyes, your hair looks so soft and then... Your lips are so pink and juicy, your cheeks red like apples, your bright eyes. Soap wondered why Roach never talked about you before, you look like a nice person or maybe there was something bad about you, he was curious, he felt like he needed to know everything about you to understand why he never heard about your existence before.

The rest of the day was definitely more difficult than at home, all your teammates including you felt exhausted and excited to see what the next weeks will bring to all of you. Meanwhile, Ghost and Soap decided they need answers, why are you there? Does the captain know who you are?.

- Price, Did you know that corporal is Roach's sibling?

- I did, so what?

- So what? Captain, why's here?

- Y/N is here by its own merits... I hope both of you can understand that and put aside the fact that Y/N is Gary's sibling.

- Cap, don't get me wrong but... Maybe Y/N is not the right person for this kind of training, that kid won't survive the first month!

- Sanderson is capable enough, you will see boys, I wouldn't approve Y/N's solitude if i didn't believe on those skills and potential. Read the files about these soldiers. You will be surprised about some of them.

Price leaves his office without saying more, Ghost and Soap observed at each other, clearly none of them have interests in the rest of your team, they want to know about you. As two kids tried to hide their interest, both sighed and left Price office.

That same night, Soap asked Kyle to check on your expedient and then share the information with him, Ghost on the other hand decided he wanted to trust on the Captain's judgment and he would keep an open mind about you.

#x yn #cod x reader #call of duty x reader #x reader #fanfiction #long reads #141 x reader #reader insert #soap cod #ghost cod #cod 141 #cod #john soap mactavish x reader #ghost x reader #soap x reader #cod mw x reader #cod fanfic #cod x you #ghost x you #soap x you #soapghost #ghost x female reader #simon ghost riley x reader #john mactavish x reader #reader imagine #x female reader #x gender neutral reader

[minimoefoe]

Rewatch Thoughts: Rogue

I wish the ep started with 15 and Ruby showing up and seeing everyone dancing and being excited, kinda like Donna and 10 Unicorn and the Wasp vibes, rather than them already being in there idk

It’s a very difficult cheese lmao I like that little scene a lot

The fact Ruby sees Susan Twist yet again and doesn’t mention it to the Doctor at any point. They had other shit going on tbf nvm

‘Faster mover’ lmao. I like the Doctor’s vibe when he says that. Like he’s actually a bit shook by the fast moving. It’s more Doctor-y than the overt flirting in the rest of the ep.

Why would Rogue think that the Doctor was a Chulder when he’s been speaking like he’s from the future or whatever. If he WAS a Chulder don’t you think he would be playing pretend as a person from 1813. Not talking about the fuckin stars

Genuinely don’t see how ppl have said they’ve seen a gay vibe between Ruby and Emily. ur waffling sorry

I’m choosing to believe 15 doesn’t like being called Doc bc it makes him think of Graham and that makes him sad but tbh I do think 13 found Graham annoying sometimes so.. Maybe it reminds him of him in a bad way 😭

15 upping the Scottish accent and mocking Rogue’s American accent earlier lol

Shoutout to Kylie Minogue

15 being flustered over the psychic paper. Also 10/10 very Doctor-y 

New boss.. So Rogue is the Meep’s co-worker then. I wonder if whenever we meet the Boss they’ll make a reference to a person who ‘worked for them but disappeared’ aka Rogue

All the faces !!!!!

I feel nothing about Richard E Grant being there other than I know I don’t consider him in any part of the Doctor canon of my mind but I hope other ppl have fun arguing about where he should be in the timelines

The way Ruby awkwardly said ‘ah.. right’ after Emily told her who she wanted to marry made me think of Charlotte Ritchie in BBC Ghosts

15 singing before entering the TARDIS was a bit cringe

Rogue kinda is Jack just less whore-y and more romantic yknow

15’s solution to not killing the bird ppl being to send them to a barren dimension is sooooo funny like king you realise why that’s actually worse than killing right😭Unless we’re supposed to assume they can survive fine in this barren dimension? But the Doctor clearly sees it as a punishment when he thinks they’ve killed Ruby so presumably not

Rogue is very pretty I fear

I like that Rogue uses ‘they’ to refer to the person he lost idk why

‘I know the word OK’, Emily is so funny

The proposal making 15 actually freak out a bit and forget he’s acting lmfao

The Chulder’s actually using the word cosplay makes me cringe a bit. I think it would've been better if ‘cosplay’ was just the word the Doctor uses to explain what they do

On first watch it was literally right as Ruby told Emily that she was from the future that I realised Emily was one of them

Ruby not actually getting got is cool but like that scene literally shows the lightning and we hear her screaming but then in the flashback to what actually happened neither of those things happen so them putting it in the initial scene feels like a shit/lazy way of trying to hide the fact it was gonna be revealed that she was pretending all along when they coulda made it so that we the audience know she’s fine bc we don’t see the telltale Chulder bodyswap signs but the Doctor thinks she’s dead. Very strange imo

Been obsessed with the way the Duchess shouts ‘the wedding’ since I first saw it in a  trailer icl

That scene with Carla feels so out of place and tbh random bc like. This is the second time Ruby has almost died in an ep so surely we shoulda seen that flashback the FIRST time it happened not now

15 loves a cry and idk how I feel about it

Other than the non-Doctor-y flirting I think this is the most Doctor-y 15 has felt to me

Did Rogue really have to replace Ruby? He literally just shoved her off? Surely he coulda just stood at the side of the triangle and pulled her out of it instead? Or are we saying that once it’s prepped for 6 ppl then it won’t leave without 6 on it? Bc I don’t think they make that clear in the episode at all

This episode is sooooo Maxine Alderton in 13’s era coded to me in that it’s an ep where the writing, other than the couple of choices I don’t love, just overall feels much tighter than the rest of the eps in the series have been like I feel like I can tell the difference 

I love 15 and Rogue’s dynamic but I really wish 15 was more awkward in his attraction to Rogue. He was far too suggestive and direct imo, it didn’t always feel like the most Doctor-y thing ever. Like he may be 'healed' (whatever that even means) but he's still the DOCTOR

Overall a banger. 4.5/5. I think this is the first ep this season  where I’ve rated it a bit higher after rewatch

#doctor who #fifteenth doctor #rogue #ruby sunday #dwrwt

[yarameijer]

Hello!! I just wanted to say i love your fics so much, when i first saw it in around 2022, i was amazed! Your writing style is so good, and it inspired me to be able to write fanfics aswell. I've gotta say, your fics are very interesting and entertaining! My most favorite fic of yours is probably Warped and Accidental Reverse. (I re-read those stories atleast 54 times i think?) Anyway, i was thinking if you had any headcanons for the Gryphon Trio? (Tsurugi, Tenma, Shindou) Also, if possible, DONT ABANDON ACCIDENTAL REVERSE PLZ🙏

Heyhey! Thank you for all the kind things you said <3 and good luck with your own fanfics!

Ohoho you don’t wanna know how many people asked for headcanons for these three and it took me ages because apparently I’m very bad at coming up with headcanons?? Who knew??

Tenma loves hugs

This means that when he gets excited he tries to tackle Tsurugi with hugs, and Tsurugi normally tries to evade him but every once in a while is caught off guard and then has to deal with octopus-Tenma

As time goes on Tsurugi starts accepting physical affection a bit more, but he's still a tsundere about it

It’s actually quite the normal sight for Tenma to hang off of Tsurgi if he gets the chance

Tenma’s less quick to hug Shindou, and for the first few months in their friendship, hugging Shindou is a very big no! in his mind because that’s his senpai, he can’t just hug him!

Over time the two of them grow more comfortable with each other and after talking out a pretty major argument (that I will be writing at some point) they hug for the first time, and get more comfortable doing so

Tenma’s still kinda shy about it tho so Shindou’s usually the instigator

Tenma is a bit more hesitant to tackle-hug Shindou than Tsurugi

Shindou is actually quite quick with giving minor physical affection! Usually shoulder touches during excitable moments, whether that’s after scoring a goal during a match or when one of his friends is upset - think light squeezes or just laying his hand on someone’s shoulder

They all live on different sides of Inazuma Town and the riverside soccer field is more or less in the middle of their houses, so if they want to meet up for soccer outside of school, that’s where they go

Usually when they hang out for non-soccer activities, they just agree to meet at the place they’re going

They like hanging out at Tenma’s place because Aki always has the best snacks, they like hanging out at Tsurugi’s place because his parents usually are working so they’ve got the place to themselves, and they don’t like hanging out at Shindou’s place because Tenma and Tsurugi feel very out of place

Despite that, Tsurugi and Tenma love listening to Shindou playing the piano

Shindou has the worst sleeping schedule out of all of them because he gets caught up in whatever he’s doing (reading a book, ridiculous research on whatever caught his attention this time, thinking up hissatsu techniques or strategies for the team, etc.) and Tenma and Tsurugi judge him for it

Tenma and Tsurugi had a lot of fun training for Fire Tornado Double Drive and end up continuing their hissatsu training together in their free time

They don’t tell anyone about it but Shindou figures it out when they keep coming to him for ‘’hypothetical’’ hissatsu questions

Tsurugi, every chance he gets, rubs in the fact that he’s the tallest out of the three of them

He bullies Tenma by raising his hand too high for high-fives or keeping things above his head out of his reach

He tries the same thing with Shindou, but every time Shindou just stares at him wordlessly, incredibly unimpressed, until he lowers his hand

In fact, Tsurugi is not that much taller than Shindou, but still the one time Shindou tried pulling the ‘’I’m older’’ card in an argument, he didn’t hesitate to play the ‘’then why are you so short’’ card and Shindou didn’t talk to him for two days

Shindou and Tsurugi also have this habit of high-fiving without looking (‘’because they think it makes them look cool’’ ‘’Tenma shut up’’) but one time they missed and Shindou slapped Tsurugi in the face by accident

It was during a match so it got caught on camera and every once in a while Tenma sends it in whatever group chat they’re all in (Earth Eleven, Raimon, etc.) to humble them

Tenma’s a lot quicker to tease them both in group chats than face-to-face

In person, Shindou is the one who teases the others the most, because their reactions are very funny

Tenma gets very shy and starts stuttering

Tsurugi tries to pretend it doesn’t bother him but he’s also very pale and it’s very easy to see when he turns red

For Tenma and Tsurugi both Shindou is (one of) their go-to person(s) for advice, although Tsurugi is a lot more quiet and subtle about it than Tenma

I’ll probably add to this later, because recently I’ve really been building these characters to my liking and I’m starting to notice that it’s easier to come up with this stuff once I’ve developed them more individually.

That being said, I should probably do headcanon lists for them individually!

#inazuma eleven go #inazuma eleven #ie11 #ina11 #ie go #ina11 go #inazuma 11 go #accidental reverse #accidental reverse ask #matsukaze tenma #tsurugi kyousuke #shindou takuto #raimon go trio #what's their official name i've seen like several versions #friendship headcanons!! #will post more later #accidental reverse headcanons

[phoenixyfriend]

HI DO YOU WANT SOME COSTUBE DRAMA THAT TURNED KINDA WHOLESOME

Pt 1: The Drama

Okay so a long-ass time ago (I think like 15 years), a British costume historian on youtube by the name of Cathy Hay decided she was going to remake 'the peacock Worth gown' and started a kickstarter for it. She made a bunch of money, but the actual work ended up being much more than she expected, so the project kept getting delayed.

In the years after, she befriended the now much more famous Bernadette Banner. They got close enough for cross-Atlantic trips to visit, etc. They were best friends and often joked that they were the same person.

Drama started riling up as people criticized Hay for not engaging meaningfully with the problematic history of the gown in question, which had been made for the wife of a British Governor of India during the 19th century, for a party celebrating British imperialism in India, and the gown's shining feature was Indian embroidery which was almost certainly underpaid, and that embroidery was the massively time-consuming bit that had been delaying her this whole time.

It was a whole thing that she sort of? Tried to address? buuuut The thing is, one of the seemingly obvious ways to manage this conflict would be to coordinate with an Indian embroiderer. In fact, a very accomplished specialist did reach out to her about collaborating on this! And she ghosted him! Maybe even blocked, I don't remember, but the thing was that he was ready and willing to do this cool project that could explore and reimagine a beautiful but morally ugly example of their shared countries' histories.

And she just… kept refusing to engage.

And then people started pointing out the weirdly predatory marketing she had for an online product/newsletter she had, and the discourse kept building as people realized overall that she was just… not as good a person as she claimed to be.

It got bad enough that Banner broke off the friendship, in large part because of that refusal to engage meaningfully with the loaded history of the Worth gown project

Pt 2: The Wholesome

So, a few days ago, Bernadette Banner released a video of her making a Regency gown. It's a very standard kind of project for her, just using old patterns and adding a touch of her own gothic tastes with historical methods to make a cool piece of clothing that explores costume history.

Halfway through, she has a call with someone she is planning to do a different video with. We don't know what the video is, but!

The thing is

The person she is having this call with

Is the Indian embroiderer, Mayankraj Singh, that Cath Hay ghosted.

And the video continues on with Banner and Singh talking about her Regency gown project and just. He ends up making an embroidered chiffon overgown with a crow motif. And it just feels very wholesome and I love to see this all coming back around.

(Okay, double-checked and apparently Hay requested a sample from Singh, and then ghosted him after she got photos of it)

In late September, another costumer, Miah Grace, released a video noting that, in 2020, Hay had requested an embroidery sample from with Mayankraj Singh, founder of the luxury fashion brand Atelier Shikaarbagh. Indian embroiderers in this shop possess skills that go back seven generations. Singh reportedly made a sample made but only sent Hay photos of it. After Hay stopped responding for many months, Singh went live on Instagram to explain what happened. Apparently, when his head embroiderer found the sample, he burned it, and scolded Singh for making it. “He said it was an inauspicious design,” Singh said, “and we do not make it anymore.” Hay later apologized to Singh, and he now considers the matter settled. - Craftsmanship Magazine

Anyway, yeah, after all of that from a few years ago, it was kind of exciting to see Banner collaborating with Singh

And she's so excited to open the package! Happy screaming!

It's so sweet.

He had his team embroider their names on the hem And she loves it

I am living for this vicarious excitement

(She does lay it on a bit thick at the end, but you know what. I'll take it.)

OH and the ending involves her attending the ball with Nami Sparrow, one of the creators of Indian background (Indian-American) that was a voice of Expertise criticizing Cathy Hay a few years ago.

Which is like. Tacit endorsement? If Singh alone wasn't enough.

Anyway yeah I lost my mind a little about this.

#phoenix liveblogs #costube #bernadette banner #cathy hay #mayankraj singh #nami sparrow #youtubers #costume history

[mister-eames]

how do you think arthur and eames would take in other slowly growing old.. I don’t see either of them as characters being insecure about themselves but how the other person would see it is kinda a mystery and exciting.. so how do you think it would go? hugs xx

Oh my goodness I love this question. I agree on them not being overly insecure in themselves - not much, or too seriously, at least. They may lament a thing here or there but nothing that would take up too much mental space.

I know it sounds a bit cliche, but overall I think they'd fall more in love with each other, tbh. Growing older is a sign of survival against an often unkind world. Of experience. It's the sexiest fucking thing in the world to see your SO earn those signs of age alongside you, to say you made it, you keep making it, despite everything life has thrown at you, you are strong enough to survive.

Though, at first, I can see Arthur having a sort of existential crisis about it.

Not because he finds Eames any less attractive. On the contrary, he loves Eames extra padding, the changes in him; the very real markers that signify that they both have survived and they are experiencing this very real privilege to get older and to do it together; that they get to share a life, full of good and bad memories - to trust someone with who you were, who you are, and who you are going to be.

But in that same regard, I can see it finally hitting Arthur in a very real way (kind of the way it hits all of us); oh... our time here is actually limited... isn't it.

Perhaps it's when they're no longer in dreamshare, risking their lives, but it occurs to Arthur in a strange, sudden sense that some day the world will go on without them. That they are in fact, mortal, despite cheating death so often in their dreams and in real life too.

Arthur might be having this crisis at 35 or 45 (probably has it every ten years after his mid-thirties tbh) and he has literal decades ahead of him, but their own own mortality really hits him. He knew, intellectually, and with Mal and Dom, and with others in his life, that nothing is guaranteed. It's just... he feels like he has earned this life with Eames, after all they've been through together and personally, and it's not even that they're geriatric or "old" by any means, but the signs are there - they are not getting younger. They are visibly growing older. There's the greys, and the aches, and the weight gain here, the fat loss there.

The fact is plain and simple with life: there is no turning this car around.

Time is a real thing. One day it starts tick-tick-ticking away very loudly in Arthur's brain, like a bomb about to go off, setting off the same kind of panic in Arthur that says do something about it -- but there is nothing to be done about it. That's the worst part. It's just life, and not even Arthur, point man extraordinaire can mitigate it or stop it.

So Eames unearths the source of Arthur's panic after Arthur takes up three new languages, asks Eames for the fiftieth time if he's sure he won't regret not having kids, dyes his hair to get rid of the greys, takes up trumpet lessons and books them a cruise or seven - and then Eames is utterly bewildered by Arthur's heightened state of existential panic because he's not even fucking old, they've never been better or happier.

At first, Eames is like, "Calm down, dear. Complain to me when we have liver spots and we're both using walkers to get around. Old is just a state of mind."

Arthur, in the midst of frantically planning a new diet for them both sans-alcohol, is not amused.

So Eames asks him, "What are you so afraid of?"

"I don't know... losing time, I guess." Arthur replies. "Or... not making the most of it."

To which Eames asks plainly, fondly, "Aside from spending your days panicking, what are you gonna do about that? What do you need to do, at the end of it all, on your final day, to look back and say 'I regret nothing'?"

"I..."

"Ask yourself: what does your life without regrets look like?"

Arthur thinks, and after a long pause says:

"I... need us to live... exactly as we are now."

"That's good."

"Maybe tell you I love you more."

"And I will do the same."

Arthur takes the deepest breath he's had in days.

Then Eames adds, "By the by, I hear that not being on your husbands back about folding laundry is the key to a long, happy life."

"Nice try," Arthur rolls his eyes, taking his beloveds face in his hand and kissing that cheeky smile. "Speaking of which. I hear helping your husband fold the laundry does wonders for longevity."

--

The press of his lips against Eames and the quiet laughter between them in that moment, is one he never forgets.

--

Later, once all the laundry is folded and they're enjoying a glass of wine, Eames will Arthur that he is wrong. They are not losing time - that every day is more time they gain together.

Arthur will concede that Eames is right, sometimes.

--

As for Eames, well. He has all the pride, heart growing with love, etc etc, but you best believe he has several canvases and sketches and papers with a timeline of every iteration of Arthur, a visual chronicle of a beautiful man, drawn by Eames, over time, in varying mediums.

Not to say Eames has never felt strange about growing older, or Arthur growing older. But he's very much at peace with it, and earned the ability to be at peace with life - and himself. He's not afraid, not when there is so much to look forward to, and so much to learn.

And so many more versions of Arthur to appreciate and adore; on paper, and in person.

--

They both take the other ageing as something wonderful, something to be cherished. We only get one chance to get old, after all, but we get near endless chances to grow older. They don't get it right every day -- that is to say that sometimes life is an alarm clock that you get up and get on with on first ring, and sometimes in life you just press snooze and both is okay -- but they get it right often enough that they can call theirs 'a life, lived'.

So, yeah, they fall deeper and deeper in love with all the signs of age on each other -- it's all the time they've had, and all the incredible time they still have to gain.

#is that an edith piaf reference yes it is #but its also something i personally ask myself so #there you have it #you can't stop Arthurs brain from Doing The Thing #but Eames is always going to make it better #or ameliorate the worst of it #because they are a team #damn i didnt mean to get so sappy but here we are #and here i am #having feelings about two dudes #as an aside i'd like to think as they get older they swap their dress sense #it just makes sense to me #inception #arthur x eames #eyy what good is your otp if not for making peace with your own mortality

[imaybe5tupid]

Traveling alone is quite dangerous for a girl.

(my toshiro overcompensating trans man hc)

bonus 1

bonus 2 ft. toshiyuki (middle brother) grown up a little but still a menace

#toshiro nakamoto #shuro dungeon meshi #my comics #i feel like when he announced himself everyone in the household was really excited his dad especially #1) now there’s an heir 2) cause he finally thought his kid was starting to be interesting and for a short time it was kind of novel #he thought it was so cool and edgy to have a son like that but then that quickly wore off #since toshiro didn’t start becoming like him or stop being a boring person to him #and lowkey the little inheritance competition where toshiros peers are like. a bratty 14yo and an 8yo. #is his way to walk it back that he should be the heir #even though he already got acknowledged and everything #meanwhile hien trying to be a woke affirming queen and just feeding his insecurities unintentionally “you’re a man aren’t you” #their friendship changes and they try to slot each other more into their gendered expectations and drift apart #toshiro compulsively works out and trains and carries himself and acts in certain ways #to be masculine in this very conventional way to affirm himself as a man and as the heir of a samurai family #and as a counterpoint to his wastrel layabout father #he becomes the kind of stealth trans guy who lives in constant state of fear and stress. to the point his little brothers have no idea #-> creates that distance emotionally from them #dungeon meshi #i think his relationship with his dad is absolutely horrendous hes a scummy guy through and through #but i personally enjoy bad relationships in fiction where there was something good to lose in the first place #and despite everything he does still care like in the first comic hes genuinely trying to be mindful #in his own condescending thoughtless way which like confirms all of toshiros worst fears about how his father sees him #like he really got assigned the retainers who are 1) 2 teenage girls one who wants to escape the other whos lowkey scared of him #3) his ex childhood best friend who things are weird with currently 4) random woman whos never even met him ONCE before #5) his smothering nanny/teacher ALL OF WHOM dont really respect him as a leader at all or have a professional rapport with him even😭 #in his dads pov he was like okay ill assign women retainers so he won’t hide from them (wrong). also ones who wont intimidate him (wrong) #damn im smart! meanwhile toshiro having a breakdown over it

[chainofclovers]

Being a human is literally like this weird combo of being okay and not okay that goes on forever except there is also death

#(i'm fine) #(personally) (mostly) (really) #this has just been an absolutely terrible year for our planet and its people and animals #and it's fucking insane that as an american living in relative safety and comfort and experiencing the pleasures and guilt of that... #...i can experience this horrible yet ENTIRELY SURVIVABLE blend of acute pain over so many things at once #including war and genocide and the utter hopelessness of that #and also things like being really really sad that matthew perry's life was so hard and he died #and also so many bad and weird things have happened to family members this year but we mostly have the resources to come together and deal #which is amazing and bolstering and exhausting #and my brain still has space to be excited about writing and numb to writing and angry/impotent about writing #desperate for feedback yet private and retreat-y and weird #always hoping to hit upon The Perfect Thing :-/ #and i live in a place that basically is not a democracy any more and also the u.s. is so cursed we've never been what we said we were #so a lot of my own perceived safety is incredibly fragile #but still so much more solid than what the people i am mourning for had #and none of the comparisons make a lick of sense and are in and of themselves deeply unfair #to the point that it's humiliating to feel guilt (making it about me) and simultaneously humiliating that i don't feel guilt *constantly* #and i have therapy this week but also this deep sense that while my therapist will be a fine person to talk to it will feel unuseful #i've always been a muddle of optimism and pessimism and i am very adamant that life is super beautiful and this is precisely why... #...all the violence in the world is so brutally devastating #it's just that the casserole of all these thoughts feels increasingly horrible #and feeling that way is 100% sane #and even intersectional frameworks and intentional attempts at gentleness only get you so far in the grapple #for meaning and for ideas of what to do #so i end up contacting my reps about various awful things #and zooming in and out on my fixations and having excellent days and terrible days #often dependent on what feels like a camera setting i only partially control #and i'm sure i'm not alone in feeling embarrassed that deep empathy and grief for people i've not met somehow ends up being... #...at least a sliver about ME and my little world #about me

[afniel]

Maaaaaaaaaaaan, come on.

(the post has ended up in the tags btw. I am not changing this and I need you to understand that it is just me talking to myself semi-publicly)

#Nevi Writes #things said by a guy writing a thing he doesn't even intend to be writing and it's like 10k of words now. >:[ #while that's true I do want to emphasize that nobody should get excited about it right now tho okay #because like it's just. idk. I feel very much like it could end up not worth pursuing anyway. it's just a little baby wip. #(when the fuck did my little baby wips get to be 1/4-1/2 the length of my previous 'finished' stories!! what the hell) #it just feels nice to make words tho. and it does have that kind of 'ah good to catch up with these guys again' vibe which is nice. #even if the break has once again been like. on the order of days to a week maybe. I'm so bad at this taking a break business suddenly. lel. #but I don't have anything much to say about it at this point #other than I'm debating inventing a reason that presidential elections would have been moved by a couple of years between now and 2212 #what is it with me and having to be so damn precise with dates in this whole narrative. am I just mad that Capcom never tries? #(yes) (so mad) #(and 2212 would actually be an election year is the problem. I want time to have passed but I also want there to be a pres. election.) #(it's fine don't worry about it) #(this is how I decided that Blucifer got bload up and then replaced also. weird reliance on mashing up IRL things and fictional explosions) #(but it's fun isn't it? got that veneer of verisimilitude. I'm good at long words) #idk this is inevitable isn't it. but I'm going to keep playing like it's not. I think I need a little more space for this one mentally. #the first one just sort of fell out of my head fully assembled and the second one did that also but with different vibes #though it did actually take some cutting things and adjusting things to make it work which Failure to Compile did not #Failure to Compile was bizarrely effortless until the mad editing dash. Outcome Unpredictable was WORK #fun work at least! but in hindsight it was definitely more work to make it flow properly. #the real job for the 3th if it happens is gonna be wrapping up threads without dropping new ones in bc that's such a habit of mine now

[rosielav]

Desperately need to find another currently ongoing podcast to listen to. I have nothing in my feed that releases new episodes except for MBMBAM and that's not nearly as exciting as I'd like it to be haha

PLEASE REC ME YOUR FAVORITE PODCASTS, PREFERABLY ONES STILL ONGOING OR WITH LOTS OF EPISODES!!!

Blease 😭😭😭😭

#Podcasts #podcast recommendation #Blease I keep getting recommended stuff that ended five years ago #Or only has like half a dozen episodes #Like I refuse at this point in my life to watch anime that is 12 episodes or less #Bc you just don't get enough substance #I'm very sure all these short podcasts are fun lil tidbits of comedy and horror and stuff #But I need something I can really sink my teeth into if you get me #Like my perfect ideal podcast is as follows #Ongoing with a full catalogue of previous episodes plus supplementary episodes or side stories that offer context #I need something to look forward to but also something to listen to right now #Camp here and there has been interesting but it's only 34 episodes and I'm literally about to finish the entire series #I don't feel satisfied when I finish something I feel empty which I'm sure could be psychoanalyzed to mean lots of bad stuff #So yes anyways lol I struggle to finish things that are short or have been finished for years #I can't bring myself to finish wolf 359 or the am Archives #For two drastically different reasons but still #The Amelia Project I was excited to csthc up on and now I'm excited for next season #Same with Victoriocity and the white Vault #But every other podcast I've listened to is completely finished and for one podcast I'm just not interested in the sequel #So yea... Please. Rec me something long and ongoing.... Blease.

[skymantle]

everytime i remember abc_123_a.ogg from undertales files i lose it even more. not only are gasters soundbytes (wng_dng1-7) sampled from it, but one of the tts voices from it reads out "DELTARUNE" at the end of chapter 1, lending even more to the idea that gaster's involved with deltarune's universe! (link to the clip below, tumblr wouldn't let me attach an actual audio file?)

it's also! interesting to note that one of the other anti-datamining files, attention_hackerz_no_2, calls chara into mind! both files were changed in versions 1.001 and beyond (abc_123_a into laugher) and this file changed into...

it's especially interesting/funny considering that the variables attached to this script are titled demona, demonb, demonc, and demond!

#but! but! abc_123_a.ogg changing to laughter means we have possible canonical gaster laughter! #sorry for! the exclamation points! I got excited...! #the question is what it all MEANS!!! #if these were simply teasing dataminers well. sorry mr fox. some things can't be forgiven! #undertale #deltarune #metatext #logs #utdr #gaster tag #chara dreemuur #wd gaster #tobys become much more accepting about datamining since 2015 so i don't feel bad theorizing about these... #deltarune even has 'Transmitting VERY EVIL computer virus into dataminer's house and room...' in chapter 2's script #compared to the. i don't want to say rude but compared to calling dataminers pathetic and sad.... #safeutdr

[eatingsomegreeneggos]

Looking at Sunny Starscout screenshots on Pinterest and crying because she's literally so perfect 🥺💗 The cutest little horse to have ever horsed, one might even call her a little pony... (altough you'll find she's actually of average height). But yeah Sunny is like actually my favorite pony period. I will stand by this I love G4 as much as the next guy but Sunny is so precious to me! I wish they'd use her character more like come on I want to see her more in mym 😭 (I love her quite a lot in tyt though) But yeah she's so great she's really interesting to me and cute and funny and I would love to be friends with her 💕💕💕

#little appreciation rant #I feel like she deserves it #shes adorable come on #I cant even explain it well I think of her making a bad joke and laughing about it and I just want to cry its so endearing #just so many things about her are so interesting #shes excited and bubbly and confident but also you can sense how shes been effected by her lonely youth and losing her dad #i say all in all she handled it really great #but stuff like her ignoring zipps concerns. not wanting to be an alicorn. being uncomfortable with being apart from her friends #stuff like that #can clearly be traced back to insecurities that she probably doesnt even realize #but also small things like her being a bit of a history nerd and being very idealistic but at the same time shes a bit oblivious and naive #I know that sounds like pointing out flaws but I think its so fun!! I love those things about her!! #and I doubt most of it was even intentional which I guess wouldve been nice if they fleshed this stuff out more #but it doesnt change the fact that I live her so so much #mlp g5 #sunny starscout #mlp

[mejomonster]

I need to read a Bad Buddy canon divergent fic where either Pran makes a move FIRST, or Pat realizes he likes Pran early.

Possible scenes of divergence:

In the scene on the rooftop where pran meets pat and says he was the one who gave him the green tea. What if in that scene Pran said "do you still want to watch the moonlight with me" and then did not follow it with "did I break your heart?". Or, if when he said that, and Pat Said "fine I'm the heartbroken one," what if Pran pushed him there. And asked why he's heartbroken, if it's because he wanted Pran... because you know that whole scene? Pran is dancing around the fact he did like Pat in high school, is kind of giddy that Pat flirted, kind of giddy Pat asked him on this date (on accident), and kind of feeling out if Pat would actually want to date him...if that was even something Pat could consider. But Pat takes Prans feeling around as "trying to put the blame of the situation on someone" so Pat let's himself be the "loser who's heartbroken." (Which is so interesting because 1. Pran literally thinks he's the heartbroken loser right now because he loves Pat and thought he lost any chance with Pat in high school so as soon as he sees Pat on this roof he hates that he got his hopes up on a potential crush, and 2. Pat will later take the conscious stance to lose to his crush Pran whenever winning would hurt Prans happiness... and even here, before Pat is even aware it's a crush he feels, he already has decided he will choose to "lose" if it will make Pran feel better. So Pat chooses to act like the "heartbroken" one in this scene, even though he's not even AWARE of why Pran feels like a loser in the moment, only aware Pran seems defensive and sort of sad so He wants Pran happy... and pran is happy when he wins their competitions).

In the scene when Pran is looking at a new apartment, Pat follows him in, and they wrestle then tickle on the bed. The audience knows, they probably would've kissed if the rental girl hadn't come in. So, how would that have changed EVERYTHING? Would they even kiss... or would Pran lay on top of Pat until they BOTH realized Pran wants to kiss, then Pran would get up, get angry and defensive, and run. And Pat would have to confront that it was VERY likely Pran had just wanted to kiss him, that it's likely pran ran away because he didn't like that he wanted to (and that entire can of worms). And Pat on a lighter immediate level would contemplate if he'd wanted Pran to kiss him... if that actually would be great. On a more concerned level, just like what actually plays out in ep 6, Pat probably wouldve gone to try to find Pran and ask why he ran. Ask why Prans scared. Why prans upset. Ask pran what he wants, why he almost kissed Pat. Pat would probably admit during such a conversation that he wishes Pran did kiss him, actually, and he doesn't know why Pran ran away when Pat isn't upset at all about the almost-kiss. And then episode 6 stuff would hit like a fucking train Way earlier in the story's plot. Because Pran wouldn't admit it's their parents feud keeping him scared of being close to Pat only to risk losing him and everything in his life here. At least he wouldn't admit it easily. And Pat would be dealing with the anvil of a realization he likes Pran, desperately loves him and does NOT want him to withdraw, did like him back in high school and was in agony when he was gone, and has been desperate to get close to him again ever since they ran into each other in college. The difference from the shows version? In the show, Pat gets all of episode 5 to deal with those realizations alone, then Pran doesn't withdrawl To An Intense level until ep 6. But if they almost kissed in episode 2 in that apartment? Oh boy. They'd be both dealing with those heavy emotions at the Same Time.

Alternatively. Pat could kiss him impulsively in that apartment bed. Thinking of it as gay chicken competition and Just, as usual, enjoying anything he does with Pran and not even realizing the depth of what that gesture Actually means to Pran right away. It would only be later, when Ink enters the plot and prans in absolute disaster mode (because pat kissed him but didn't even mean anything by it), that pat would realize oh OH pran has loved him since high school. And Oh no... pat totally wrote off prans feelings, didn't think about if pran cared, and now it makes sense why pran is avoiding him like the plague. It would play out a bit like the Canon story's eps 5 and 6, except in reverse. Pran would be withdrawn first (like ep 6) and then pat would figure out he's in love and prans been in love.

The scene where pran is designing the bus stop and pat pretends to be his boyfriend. Though honestly? Any little scene anywhere in the show, could work for this kind of exploration.

In the shows story canon, pran says in episode 5 right before the kiss "you can't keep doing this to me. We aren't a thing. We aren't even friends." And those lines speak volumes. It's an acknowledgement pat HAS been flirting. Both in high school and in college, before he realized he liked pran and after. But to pran, its been interpreted as flirting with no intent to actually be with pran. Flirting with no intent to take prans feelings seriously. And even if Pat WAS oblivious to his own crush? When pran says that, pat is fully aware he Has been flirting for years. "You can't keep doing this to me" pran says. Keep acting territorial over who's close to me (when I can't do it to you), keep flirting with me (leading me on so I keep wanting you... and Pat does purposely tempt pran to keep engaging with him, because pat loves being close to pran, even when pat isn't aware he has a crush.... on some level pat has always been aware that when he Flirts pran responds by interacting with pat more, and pat WANTS that and has wanted that for ages... maybe even since pran saved Pa as a child tbh). Pran is talking about how pat has been trying to keep pran close to him, but they cant be close. Both because pat kept picking friends and girls over pran, and because their family situation and friend situation won't LET them be close even if they tried to be. "We aren't a thing" is about romance. It's vague, it could be about a lot honestly. But to me I see it as pran being like "we aren't lovers, we aren't even fuck buddies, we aren't crushes (according to what you said to me about liking ink)" and then "we aren't even friends". To pran, it's clear pat has acted way more intimately than a friend would... for ages. And in that moment on the rooftop pat is aware he HAS been. Even when he wasn't aware he liked pran romantically, on some level he Had to pick up on pran crushing on him (after all pat doesn't go through any big exploration trying to figure out if pran likes him... it's obvious from all the times pran shut down pats flirting and fled, the way pran wrote a LOVE SONG FOR PAT, from the times pran put out feelers to see if pran would respond to the bait and Just Ask Him Out). And Pat has been indulging in prans crush by giving it attention, to keep pran close to him. And the "we aren't even friends"? Pat is so jealous of SO MUCH, but mostly that. He can't even go to prans house and eat dinner, the way friends can. He can't go up to pran and ruffle his hair and hug him and smile and joke in public with him... like prans friends (especially wai) can do at any and all times. Pat can't simply knock on his door and be let in (pran made him jump through hoops, pat has to push for every inch... which is partly why he resorts to flirting... because it Works and pran gives up an inch at a time, but pran pushes pat away constantly so pat can't just go into his room to hangout for no reason, can't give him headphones without an excuse, can't cry on his bed about a stupid fight or get drunk with him at a public bar. In fact who knows how much pat indulging his friends desire to beat up architecture kids was (at least ep 1-2) partly pat subconsciously angry those people got to cling to pran and ask for his help and hug him and laugh with him when pat can't even walk next to him in public or knock on prans family door? The line "we aren't even friends" hits pat right in the heart. The line "we aren't a thing" hits pran in the heart.

That emotionally open conversation on the roof in ep 5 before the kiss? In reality, they might have been able to have that conversation at any point. It could have happened earlier, a bit different. But the core of it: that pat has been flirting without being able to give pran the full reprocitiy he wants, and that pran keeps pushing pat away because he's scared of getting what he wants then it destroying the part of his life he enjoys. That was there since they ran into each other in college. And the outcome would ultimately always end the same: pat would decide if pran wants it? Then he CAN commit to giving full reciprocity and the consequences are worth it to pat. And pran would get what he's wanted forever, and be terrified of losing it on the terms of outside consequences instead of by his own choice, and withdraw.

It's possible the scene in the sleepover, when pat confesses to liking ink...that in that particular night, things could have gone differently. If pat had said he liked pran? Or pran had the guts then to ask "do you like me?" Instead of do you like ink? That night could have gone very interesting. Because if pran DID ask "do you like me?" Pat would've stopped his one way track mind on ink. He would've been surprised. Then he would've realized, if pran sounded serious, that pran liked him. And that would've made pat more careful in what he said next. Because pat, conscious of his crush or before that, would always rather lose then see pran hurting. He'd rather he has to move next time their parents threaten, he'd rather pran was never sent to boarding school, he'd rather confront his parents then have pran feel he has to do the confronting. And he'd rather admit he likes pran first, if pran feels safer that way (hence ep 6). So if pran DID ask if pat liked him? The entire trajectory might change. I'd be very interested to see how. I imagine later, after that night, hed confess to ink still as more of a weight off his shoulder and excuse to vent about his other crush to her (just like in canon). But what would pat say that night, if pran asked? Would pat say "who wouldn't like you?" And try to deflect his sudden realization that pran might want or need an answer to the years of flirting pats done just to keep pran from throwing him farther away. Would he say that to make it clear he thinks prans great, he just isn't ready to answer? Would pran be pissed off at that answer, that non answer, because it's another occurrence of pat flirting with him without committing to SHOWING if he really likes pran back or not. Would pran tell him to get out? Would pat deflect and ask "do you like me? I'm very likable." Would it devolve into them challenging the other to see who falls first, like in ep 6, to spare both of them the terrifying notion of having to confess their true feelings that night? Would pat be brutally honest, and answer without thinking, and just say "I've never thought about it." Which would break prans little heart, confirm that pat HAS been flirting with no intention of follow through, imply that pat never liked pran as much as pran THOUGHT he did (pran especially used to think the crush was mutual in high school). I am so curious

Anyway yeah. I'd love some canon divergent fic. If you've read any, PLEASE recommend me some! ToT

#bad buddy #patpran #meta #lb #rant #im thinking about it and. if pran at ANY POINT had kissed pat? #had dared to say: i like you. date me you prick. unless youre a coward. #pat would have IMMEDIATELY WITHOUT EVEN THINKING ABOUT IT AGREED. #he might think its a competition first or pran playing mind games and pat might be terrified #that pran doesnr actually like him and is planning to leave pat heartbroken now that pats falling for him #but like. in the moment? if pran kissed him? pat is KISSING BACK no hesitation #if pat asked him out? as in directly. yes no as only options? pat is saying yes. #because pran approaches his crush very sideways. he will throw a feeler out and see if pat takes the bait. but pran wont #actually say or do what he really feels. now... thats just his Character so pran is Not likely to kiss or make tje first move. #but im saying if he DID? things would go GREAT #i think pran mightve made the first move in high school. like #if hed been able to sing his song and see pat after? them excited they played? hed admit to pat the song is about pat. #and pat wouldve been shocked but probably flattered. and 100% wouldve #tried to see if he had a crush back and explore that with pran #(which is Exactly why prans mom sent pran away. sje probably knew if they kept hanging out theyd get together #its horrible but yeah ive met parents who did shit like that. no way she didnt rip pran away #to keep him away from pat)

[flugame-mp3]

SEASON NINE FINALE WAS WILD. I HAVE MANY MANY THOUGHTS. WHAT JUST HAPPENED. A FUCKING ROLLER COASTER FOR SURE

#theo.txt #I DID NOT REALIZE DEMON DEAN WAS NOW #DESPITE KNOWING THAT YEAH HE LOOKS ABOUT THAT AGE OR WHATEVER IN THE SCREENCAPS IVE SEEN #WHEN I TELL YOU I CHEERED AT THE END WHEN I REALIZED WHAT WAS GOING ON!!!!! i love crowley pulling some bullshit at the last minute. classi #king of hell shit #and in the end scene where it's just mark sheppard's stellar monologue and the EYELID NOISE... chefs kiss that got me so hyped for s10 #i do think this finale got me really interested to see what s10 brings generally #AND DOESNT ROWENA SHOW UP THIS SEASON?? WE LOVE TO SEE IT IM EXCITED #rip gadreel though he was an interesting character. sad he had to die just to prove a point and blow up a cell. but a fitting end ig?? :( #i also loved cas's plan at the end though with the angel radio thing. get his ass lol #but also god i felt so bad for him. can the narrative give him a fucking break. he is trying his god damn best #the curse of free will and the curse of loving. painful but you do it anyway. castiel when i get my hands on you #also if i am not mistaken... the shot parallels to sams first death with deans death... we cry #IS SAM JUST GONNA BE ALL ALONE NOW?? I ASSUME CROWLEY TAKES DEAN WITH HIM? #OH NO 😭😭😭 SAM BABY IM SO SORRY #not that he doesnt always have a rough time but he has a particularly excruciating season. someone give this man a hug #i feel for him very deeply #'i lied' 'ain't that a bitch?' got me. i hate them. SOOOO brothers. #anyway #AAAAAAAAUGH #also why was metatron the worlds number one destiel shipper at the end of the season here im DEAD. MULTIPLE pieces of dialogue hes like 'yo #did it all for HUMANITY... for your ONE HUMAN of CHOICE... the HUMAN who motivates you...' JUST CALL HIM A SLUR WHY DONT YOU #im dead #idk what the general community thoughts are on that episode but i did enjoy it. wild fucking ride from start to finish #s9 wasnt my favorite and definitely did not hook me in the second quarter for some reason. def was not as compelling as like s7 for me but #the points that i liked i really enjoyed #loved sam resorting to summoning crowley. he wants his ass dead SO bad. i think sam deserves the world after the shit he was put through #this season #anyway overall. i am gnawing on the walls and pacing around my room at incredible speeds. what is UP with this show. #man.

[theultracharmingladynoire]

This has been a rant building up for a while now and I just need to put it in here but it's that. I remember the joy and excitement I felt when I watched y/o/i ep 1 - 10 because I literally. Knew nothing about the show except for the fact it was gay?? dvsjgshd but it just was so GOOD but then I. Came across a couple of interpretations of ep 11-12 (which I hadn't watched by then so I had no idea what went down) which was just people being disappointed, people thinking the ending was changed for a season 2, people thinking it was out of nowhere (especially V/ictor's comeback?? I guess??) And that really. messed up my perception of the show?? Like upto then I was forming my own interpretations of the characters and after this I. Was lowkey scared to watch the last two episodes because I was afraid of it being bad™ (if that even makes sense) and then one day even when I did watch them I didn't watch them properly?? Like I even missed a lot of scene and dialogue because I was too nervous about what I had read about it before.

And like. I don't even think those interpretations are entirely wrong for record. I understand that especially when there was a whole week between episodes and when the fandom was so huge and active people might have a very different viewing experience which directly plays into how they interpreted the character arcs! And those interpretation are extremely valid even though I disagree with them. The show definitely leaves a lot upto intrepretation of the viewers so there isn't any interpretation that is necessarily wrong™ (Idk how to phrase this sorry)

But it's just that I wasn't able to form MY own interpretation properly because I was influenced by others' ?? (In lack of a better way to word it) and I just. I've been mulling over this for a whole MONTH and going back and forth and back about the ending. And it just feels very draining when I go out to look for meta and people who had opinions similar to mine and find...like what ten people?? it kind of makes me feel like I am looking at things wrong, and that probably the finale WAS just bad or whatever (which seems to be a more common idea in what I've seen)

I do think there were pacing issues, and I do think the character arcs CAN be interpreted differently than what they are in the finale but I also am a bit sad that not many people tried to recontextualise the show in light of the finale (again, it isn't a MUST But I really wish people tried to if I am making sense?)

And it's sad because I know this can be fun if I just created my own bubble without all the meta and opinions I disagree with but it's hard when that is somehow always what I come across? And I KNOW I should stop reading a post when I see that it may suggest something towards the opinions that I disagree with (because that'll just waste my energy), but then what if I AM wrong? What if those posts are right and I am willingly closing my eye towards what the characters originally are or something?? Is what perplexes me out and really makes me sort of nervous and uneasy(?)

And now it is getting worse and I feel like I am slowly losing all the love I had for this show and it absolutely SUCKS because I just want to enjoy this silly little show and now this is all....just a mess

#N rambles #I feel like I am just repeating things at this point #I've been trying to hold back a lot from venting about this on the main because it just plainly seems like a very trivial thing to be this #upset about #But after weeks of ranting in tags I just feel I really HAVE to say this because it is actually really making me sad #Like. I thought maybe after exams I wouldn't be upset? And I was so excited to do a lot more things for the show #I was so excited and looking forward to this #Especially since I have TOO much of free time now so I also am prone to overthinking in such a situation #And I did and this just sucks and I am fed up with just overthinking and keeping all of this to myself and getting too upset #so. yeah. I still feel very bad but I also think it's probably due to a lot. Of other factors #and this one is not helping #And for one thing: I am actually really nervous about posting this because this seems to be such a dividing topic #And by no means am I saying people shouldn't have been upset - but...yeah #I just. Don't know. I really do wish I could find more people who are active and who liked the finale?? I really want to talk about #The character arcs and themes and ramble about them but there's no one to. talk about it to positively??? #I also want to rewatch the show. It would actually just solve this problem but #I am low-key scared??? I don't think this would be a right time to do it because I am just really confused about this whole issue and it #Will definitely reflect in forming my own opinions and I don't want that #like at this point I just want to discuss about the finale with people who also didn't feel it was too off or ooc or something #And just tried to intrepret it in good faith #Again I don't really care about people disliking it obviously #It's just that*I* wish I could find more people who liked it #(sorry for the weird phrasing in this whole post I am trying to express what I feel but idk how to do it exactly) #Also I used the slashes because I don't want this to turn up on search sorry