#userorb

[the-force-awakens]

#appreciation post for poe's very pretty eyes (▰˘◡˘▰)

#swedit #starwarsedit #usersophie #userorb #star wars #poe dameron #nym.gifs #originally i was just gonna post to my sideblog but. #they're like bottled starlight oml #also i got distracted by his stubble an ungodly amount

[poelya]

Just wanted to say your Poe rant was so good and do true, Nym!! 👌

I regularly get frustrated with just how much Poe's feelings are dismissed, overlooked, or just plain ignored throughout the sequels. Yes, Finn and Rey are still good friends, but Poe needs certain things (things everyone has the right to) that he's just not getting. He's always looking out for everyone else, more often than not throwing his own needs under the bus for them, but i just don't see anyone doing that for HIM. I remember that one quote about Poe being everyone's best friend, but it made me sad because not everyone is HIS best friend back. Poe needs those reassurances, he needs that approval, he needs that genuine appreciation for how much he works his ass off, or even just for being himself. Poe just seems to be held to an unfairly high standard by most people, and no one seems to notice how damaging that is.

Ough, that Charles Soule quote was floating around in my head yesterday when I was talking to @dameronalone about it, but I ultimately forgot to bring it up there OR in my analysis so thank you for bringing it up! I think the fact that Poe does come across as everyone's best friend might have a lil bit of a handshake meme with the way he's so eminently ride or die for people just from the bare minimum — and certainly I don't think he's close to everyone he's friendly with, but I think there's a level of something there.

But you're absolutely right on all accounts! It can be kind of frustrating to watch, because so much of his emotional needs are neglected or outright dismissed — and that's not even counting what you just said, about impossible standards. More ranting, and lots of subjectivity below the cut.

This is not a "I'm ignoring the nuance" of these situations kind of post, and I'd like to say outright I do try my best to understand where every character is coming from in an objective way, etc, bc I'm like a lil scientist sticking them under microscopes.

That being said this is about Poe, about his feelings, and he's the actual light of my life so there do be a very narrow view of things ahead bc I'm focusing on *him*. Okay? Okay. Now that that's out of the way.

My heart just honestly breaks for Poe constantly, considering....how little anyone seems to take his feelings into consideration? Although I certainly believe that he likely kept some degree of his captivity a secret....I honestly can't imagine what would have gone through his head if Poe knew that Leia still thought her son could be saved after torturing him - hell, even brought back to their base, mere hours probably after Poe told Tas he never wanted to talk about Ren again until the day he was behind bars.

And I think the biggest "Poe is held to impossible standards he can't reach" moment for me, is in tlj during his first conversation with Holdo. She makes a jab at him for the dreadnought run, reminding him of the people he just lost under his command. Which, sure, impulsivity and disobeying orders is a good reason to remind someone that you don't trust them.

However.

The only reason your ass is alive to say these things, is because he went through with that plan. Had the Dreadnought still been around, the Resistance would have been obliterated in nothing flat. They would have all been dead.

The (admittedly delayed) accomplishment of saving the fleet, is entirely dismissed. This is on the grander scale, but we see this again in tros.

Poe has grown, obviously, since tfa and tlj. Gone are the days where Leia is pinching the bridge of her nose and telling him to put some battles back that's too many. Instead of recklessly running back into the village against hopeless odds and damning his mission, or recklessly pursuing a battle with likewise poor odds and having a similarly high cost, Poe now hauls fucking ass in the most reckless fashion imaginable from a fight. Come hell or fucking high water, he's getting out of this fight like he's been told repeatedly he needs to, to save as many people as possible.

And the accomplishment of saving their lives over drastic odds, completing his mission, is almost immediately dismissed. His out of the box thinking is also derided - sure, everyone survived, but the ship that can clearly be fixed a billion times over got trashed so!! That's still not enough.

And it comes up again and again I think in tros in little ways also - getting teased for his past with Zorii, the most. [gestures vaguely] the 4D Chess argument that he and Finn have where they're talking about the Force Sensitivity but not really but they ARE its just accidentally cutting to the heart of Poe's insecurities and whoops he tried throwing that in Finn's face and WHOOPS that backfired fr....

tfw when you're playing 4D chess so your friend can safely come out as force sensitive during an argument but then you try throwing the fact that you're not force sensitive back at him and in doing so accidentally get right to the heart of your insecurities of not being enough and him, still on the subject of force sensitivity, unintentionally affirms this!!

[head in my hands] sometimes these three exhaust me, they really do. I love them but ongod you guys need to work on your communication.

And I think what's ultimately so tragic about the fact that Poe's feelings and needs often fall to the wayside, is that the moments where we DO get people praising Poe or being truly affectionate about him....Poe misses it.

I can't specifically think of an example for Rey or Finn in the movies off the top of my head, but it happens with Leia. It happens with Leia consistently in tlj.

Obviously, there's the fact that he's unconscious during the "he's a troublemaker. I like him" "me too", but Poe also misses a little bit of her fond smile at him aboard the transport by looking back towards the Raddus, and then again on Crait, he turns around before he can truly see Leia's proud mama look during the "follow me" scene.

Like truly is it any wonder he immediately crumbled the second he was no longer leading WITH Leia? He was already being made to feel like nothing he did was good enough as her second in command - of course he freezes up at the thought of being the ONLY one in charge, and needs someone to help carry the load with him. So much rides on poe's shoulders, and no one gives him the grace he needs.

And when those reassurances he's craving, the praise he needs, finally do come to light - he's already looking to the next problem, and misses it entirely.

#ask box #userorb #my meta #ISH! #no shade to any character I love them all but also y'all need to shape up a lil bit #he's! trying his fucking best!!!!!

[thefrogdalorian]

🎱 ⇢ post your AO3 total stats 

🍓 ⇢ how did you get into writing fanfiction? 

🥑 ⇢ you accidentally killed somebody, which mutual(s) do you text for help?

🥤 ⇢ recommend an author or fanfic you love

🧩 ⇢ what will make you click away from a fanfiction immediately?

Helloooo thanks for sending some emojis!! 💕

🎱 ⇢ post your AO3 total stats 

Here they are! I don't know how they stack up but it's nice to have a little record of this moment! Unholy word count considering I started posting at the end of September 🫣

🍓 ⇢ how did you get into writing fanfiction? 

Well I did have a Wattpad account like a decade ago where I posted rpf 😭!! But I have mostly blocked such A Horror from my memory. This time at least, my journey to begin writing Mando fanfic took a few months I guess. I started reading a lot of fanfic after season 3 ended. Then last summer I read a book called Fangirl by Rainbow Rowell. I got it cheap from a charity shop lmao and it's about a nerdy girl who goes to college and writes fanfic, and I just thought "Hey, I could do that!" It's a sweet story and she doesn't shy away from being a nerd or a writer and I wish I did the same at Uni but hey ho! I'm embracing my nerdiness now. So there we go haha. That's my uncool story 😎!

🥑 ⇢ you accidentally killed somebody, which mutual(s) do you text for help?

I feel like I could rely on you, Orb! I think you'd probably give good advice and stop me panicking. Then I would text @suresnips simply to ask for Din pics to calm me down HAHA. Then for the real nitty gritty of it all, I'd ask @decembermidnight because she kind of scares me [affectionate]. I think she would know what to do, how to handle the logistics of getting rid of a body because no, I'm not going to even attempt to explain it to the police.

🥤 ⇢ recommend an author or fanfic you love

Ahhh I'm gonna recommend my favourite Din/reader fic that I read so far, it's called Beneath Beskar and is, in my opinion, a MASTERPIECE. I think I read it last like a year ago, definitely due a reread soon! It's so good, the slow burn and characterisation AND PLOT TWIST/REVEAL AT THE END! Incredible.

🧩 ⇢ what will make you click away from a fanfiction immediately?

Basically just poor spelling/grammar to the point of it being unreadable, but that's very rare. Or if there was an improperly tagged trigger. But I'm not very fussy about plot or characterisation! I'll give most things a shot tbh :D

Writers Truth & Dare Ask Game

#inbox #ask game #writing #userorb

[the-force-awakens]

In the night, find the light, Rey. Star Wars Sequel Trilogy (2015-2019)

#swedit #starwarsedit #starwarsblr #swsource #usernik #usersophie #userorb #filmedit #nym.gifs

[the-force-awakens]

did you mean: the light of my life? [insp / template]

#swedit #starwarsedit #starwarsblr #swsource #starwarscolors #usersophie #usernik #userorb #star wars #poe dameron #nym.gifs

[the-force-awakens]

Hi. I'm Poe. STAR WARS: THE LAST JEDI (2017)

#swedit #starwarsedit #swsource #starwarsfilms #starwarsblr #disneysw #thestarwarsdaily #usersophie #userksena #userorb #usernik #nowritingonthewall #star wars #the last jedi #poe dameron #nym.gifs #technically for my poeaversary tomorrow but i'm posting early bc tomorrow is pjo!

[the-force-awakens]

Alright, listen up. I don't like these rust buckets, and I don't like our odds, but - what the hell?

#swedit #starwarsedit #starwarsblr #swsource #usersophie #userorb #star wars #the last jedi #poe dameron #nym.gifs #uwu i love him

[the-force-awakens]

Thinking about what a sweet, kind, silly and gentle hearted person Poe is until you piss him off and once that switch is flipped, he's a force to be reckoned with

Oh, did you mean? my most favorite? facet? of his character? that makes me lose my marbles? and also happens to be maybe my favorite character trope of all time? that? Okay I hope you were expecting an infodump because what-ho! that's what's happening, I have come prepared and with receipts, let's fucking go on how Poe Dameron is a goddamned force of nature and how the galaxy should be really fucking thankful his loyalty is first and foremost to the Resistance and to the Light, because if it wasn't...well, I'd dread to think, but it wouldn't be good for anyone else.

The fun thing for me, is that it has always been a part of Poe's character, right from The Force Awakens -- it's subtle, but it's there, hidden between the sassy quips in the face in danger and the professionality of Commander Dameron; little fleeting moments that tell you that Poe Dameron is not someone to be trifled with at all, including one of his very first scenes:

I'm 90% certain that Poe's gaze actually lands first on Tekka's body here, before lifting it up to glare at Ren - and that's more than just a defiant glare, that's a look of loathing. Which fits, considering that I do believe the Force Awakens novelization confirms that Poe rushes in without thinking, and acts on sheer anger/rage when he goes to shoot Ren after Ren kills Tekka.

(More lengthy thoughts under the cut, I was not kidding, I saved a dozen images for this).

And that look is far from the only moment in TFA that clearly goes "oh. yeah, Poe can be scary when he wants to be", there's this frankly delightful moment during the trench run when Poe sees a fellow pilot perish while covering him:

and then moments later, when Poe flies into the heart of Starkiller to destroy the oscillator, we get this shot:

that's far more than just determination/focus, he's angry. and he has every goddamned right to be - he was just held captive and tortured for (??) days, and this monstrosity just destroyed an entire fucking planetary system, and the very Republic that Poe has spent his entire adult life believing the inherent values of, that he thought could genuinely improve. Never mind the detail that Poe probably likely spent time on the Hosnian System, if he didn't live there temporarily during his time in the Defense Fleet.

But these shots makes it clear where the comic gets the idea from that the First Order might, y'know, actually be. A little bit terrified of Poe Dameron:

He's a serious threat, and ruthless when it comes to the First Order. People joke a lot about Poe being reckless, but I don't see a lot of recognition for the fact that he can be ruthless - he sees point b and dives straight at it, and he's absolutely relentless in his determination to take the First Order down.

The quickest possible way to enrage Poe is inaction or injustice. We see this clearly in the Last Jedi, when he believes Holdo is essentially leading them to their deaths and has thrown the Resistance away:

but we also see it as far back as Before the Awakening by Greg Rucka:

This conversation carries on for a page or so more, I think, with Poe arguing against the New Republic's decision to not act or investigate further (it's also what prompts him into going rogue to investigate on his own, which leads Leia into recruiting him for the Resistance).

And we've even seen it in material as recent as Free Fall, which means this is a character trait Poe has had his entire life:

(these do not paint my girl in a great light but like she's fucked up okay!! and being groomed into taking her mother's place it's fine, it's fine, she's my fucked up little blorbo)

anyway. so this is Poe when he's, probably about 16? 16 going on 17 here, and this is probably the angriest he's ever been considering how shocked he is about the chill in his own voice (which if you were ever curious why I say Poe's anger runs cold, it's because of this scene right here). He's so enraged by the injustice being carried out by Sotin, that he's genuinely - for the first time in the book - considering actually killing someone. And he gets into a screaming match about what the right decision is with Zorii.

(he also gets to punch Sotin later, by the way, if you even care. It's glorious. I love my favorite character who decides murder is okay if said murder is in question a guy who deals in the slave trade)

But also.

My favorite instance of this, ever, which rewrote my fucking goddamned brainchemistry in 2017 when I read it and made me have to step away from my computer and honest to god pace the length of my house to walk it off, is his confrontation with Terex in issue #13 of the Poe comics.

Because you know what?

This entire fucking exchange is personal, and almost/pretty much outright vindictive? Like at this point, Poe has solidly won this round - Terex has finally been defeated, and all Poe has to do is hand him over to the First Order. He knows, in doing so, Terex will likely be killed, and after who knows how long of Terex's bullshit meaning Poe couldn't trust his squadron, and the fact that L'ulo just died - well, Poe's not real broken up about it, which is fun in itself.

But then he asks Malarus if he can have a moment with Terex before he hands him over and Poe....uses that moment to gloat.

And y'all know me i don't use words like that for Poe but like. he kind of does? he asks a moment alone with terex specifically so that he can taunt Terex that he won, that Terex didn't beat him, and that in trying to take Poe down, Terex cost himself everything (a fact Poe happily rubs in his face), and even adds that "and when I give you to the First Order, I bet they'll take the rest."

So like. Yeah.

Poe knew full well they'd likely kill him, and spends the next few issues full heartedly believing that Terex was dead. And he taunts Terex with it here in this moment. It is TRULY glorious and honestly had 17 year old me's little head spinning because it was such a subversion of what I thought Poe would do -- but he did! He didn't try to figure out a way to spare Terex's life, and he used his final moments with Terex to make sure Terex knew that Poe was fully aware of what the choice he was making meant.

It's fucking DELICIOUS.

And I also love this panel from earlier into the issue:

Because again, it's a great illustration of how Poe can come off cold because of the art choices Phil Noto made here: look at the jacket. It's zipped up all the way to Poe's neck (a rarity for Poe), and just generally gives him this very closed off, cold appearance because he's at his wit's end in this issue, and he is angry about the circumstances Terex has forced him into.

So...yeah. Poe Dameron is a sweet, compassionate, silly guy who makes the worst fucking puns you've ever heard this side of the galaxy. He loves his droid, wears his mother's wedding ring with the intent to give it to the right partner someday, and loves all of his friends full heartedly and is generally the most tactile, affectionate person you will ever meet. He's pretty much everyone's best friend, because he has that kind of charisma and ability to make anyone feel like they're the most important person in the galaxy.

But Poe Dameron is also the man that the First Order seems genuinely intimidated/afraid of. He's the man that destroyed Starkiller base, and toppled the most powerful crime syndicate in the galaxy when he was just 17 years old. He is not someone you ever, ever want to piss off, because for all his warmth and love, Poe has an anger that runs cold, and when he hates something - it's just like when he loves something, he doesn't go half-way.

General Organa isn't the only Resistance general that can be absolutely terrifying in her own right as much as she can be gentle and loving. It's just that Leia's the only one anyone ever notices, because...well, Poe's silly and funny and usually kind of easy going.

And the fact that people underestimate him is what makes him that much more dangerous.

#userorb #ask box #my meta #poe dameron #listen. listen. he's SWEET and he's charming but also ongod the first order is /afraid/ of him and can you REALLY blame them #the best fucking trope in the world is the silly goofy soft characters that also can make that switch #to like. stealing from doctor who now. to going full oncoming storm #it's WONDERFUl #i love it so much we need more instances with this trope #flashing gif #death mention cw

[the-force-awakens]

I think something that no one talks about is how Poe leans more towards being an anti-hero than just plain hero. He's willing to do the "wrong" things for the right reasons, ex: willing the kill bad people to save the innocent, basically willing to do the dirty work that no one wants to talk or think about. and I think it should be talked about more. Your post was just *chefs kiss*, the way you understood Poe is so refreshing compared to what I see him reduced to in canon

Poe definitely is willing to make the tough calls, including being willing to kill bad people to save innocent people (or destroy a planet to save countless others), but I wouldn't necessarily sort him into the antihero trope myself, more the "good is not nice" trope.

Because for as much as Poe is willing to shoot the bad guys, or blow up a planet if it means saving the galaxy, he's usually the first person to lower his blaster or offer someone a second chance. The biggest source of conflict between himself and Zorii in Free Fall is the fact that Poe can't fit into this life of shades of grey, and that's a trait that does follow him to the Resistance. He can lie (badly) for them, he can steal ships, be labeled a criminal if it's done for the right reasons/for the Resistance but at the same time, he also......really can't wrap his head around and seems uncomfortable at times with Suralinda's way of manipulating or recontextualizing the truth for propaganda purposes (which i wish had...been better explored in the comics it's Fine, but like I wanna know more about Poe "can't lie" Dameron and Suralinda "i'm here to tell a good story" Javos. I WANT TO KNOW MORE LUCASFILM), even if Suralinda is doing those things for the Resistance, so they can gain more support.

There's also this quote of Rian Johnson's, that I really love, and that I feel like sums up Poe the best for me:

“Oscar is like a reincarnation of my favorite old movie stars; he has that old school magnetism paired with insane acting chops. Poe is a straight-up, good-guy hero, and although he gets put through the wringer in this film, because of Oscar you never lose faith that he’s going to come out the other end all the better for it.” [from this post]

I'm having trouble wording/it's kind of hard for me to explain, but like. I view Poe as someone who is, like Rian describes him, as a good-guy hero, who usually cannot quite stop the instinct to do the heroic thing, and how that can make him quite reckless (I do believe Oscar actually described Poe during the TFA Press Tour as "recklessly heroic" sir I'm sorry i ever doubted you about Poe being reckless, I thoroughly learned my lesson #13 Poe issues and a knife to Poe's hand later) - but I think also that doesn't mean that Poe needs to look like the hero, and I think TLJ proves that? He does what he believes is the best for the Resistance, and seizes control of the Raddus. It's a last resort, of course, and I don't think he necessarily cares about what people might think of him for it* - he's a commander, he makes the hard calls all the time, and regardless of his own desire to be a hero, I don't think Poe necessarily wants to be praised as one. He's just gonna do the right, most heroic thing at any given moment, and doesn't care what people say. I mean...we kind of get the impression he's used to being seen a certain way, y'know? Poe doesn't seem surprised in the least when Holdo berates him, he just has this look of "oh this banthashit again I thought I'd heard the last of it", y'know?

*y'know except for leia. because he definitely makes a face when she says that thing about holdo in the transport. anyway moving on because this got completely. the train jumped the track here. adhd moment.

As much as he is willing to do some hard things for the Resistance, I feel like Poe would. not last a day in the Rebellion - the Rebellion is just gray. You have to be, fighting something like the Empire, they're quick and dirty and. manipulative and liars and assassins, and Poe...wouldn't have the heart for that, I think. So I do believe there would be a line, in what Poe would even be willing to do for the Resistance.

That said, I do wish canon/fanon would be more willing to explore....any of his. nuance. that everyone seems very allergic to acknowledging, and I'd especially be interested in seeing more of Poe's - I'm a dw nerd sorry I'm just gonna call it this every time - "oncoming storm" side because it's so much fun. There's some other facets of his character I'd love to see explored in more detail, but that one especially. It would honestly be a dream, I think, if Alex Segura got to write for him again, but perhaps this time in the Resistance era, because I think that man would have a blast!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! with writing a good spy adventure.

#ask box #userorb #my meta #(again. oops?) #poe dameron #i haven't seen anyone categorize him more as an anti-hero before tho! but tbh i also. #don't see many people categorizing him as good is not nice either #because that would imply. yknow. acknowledging that poe has depth #and nuance. #and that he exists as a character outside of being attractive or a part of [is sniped] #anyway. #unfortunately getting any exploration on him would. involve.....actual content for him and we're in the middle of a fcking drought right no #i would also Love if someone explored how sensitive he can be t hough #and i don't just mean in a fjaofjaosfj oscar 'he has a sensitive side' isaac way lmfaoooo but wouldn't that be something #poe definitely has rsd i think because he takes rejection/slights SO hard #i kind of want to make a compilation of it JUST from the movies/resistance alone #unfortunately there's So much there (plus in through the turbulance) that i.........do not have the spoons to do so

[the-force-awakens]

Just thinking about how Poe is so open to giving affection and compliments and does is SO effortlessly and how I just wanna call him a pretty boy and watch him malfunction and become a blushing, stammering mess

i imagine what would happen would be very similar to that tiny moment in tfa where dameron.exe effectively crashes when Finn leans in close to talk to him Very Seriously About Rey and all systems switch over to the bi panic of "pretty man leaning in close":

there's not a damn thought in his head right there. not a one. i'm hopelessly in love with him. which just brings me right back to the point of this ask: can you seriously for real imagine flustering poe dameron? can u actually imagine making him malfunction? i would either malfunction just from how flipping endeared i am with him, or get SO smug i'd also do a full system (heh) crash

#ask box #userorb #i-belong-to-the-stars #also yes his ear IS that red i checked to see if my coloring had fucked up #im guessing it's from wearing the helmet so long #[once again Yeah It's a Scrap Gif]

[the-force-awakens]

I can't view a simple gif set of Rey without my brain making it completely about Poe just from a blurry side glimpse of him

You know that scene at the end of the last jedi, when Rey and Leia are talking? In the shots focused on Rey, in the corner you can actually see Poe bobbing in and out of frame while he talks to....C'ai? I think? Or maybe Ematt? I can't remember who.

Anyway, you can see him in literally the very edge of the frame, I don't even think his head is properly in the shot, but you bet your britches I have gotten distracted watching those out of focus awkwardly cropped shots of him at the edge of the frame instead of. Y'know. Focusing on the actual scene itself.

#ask box #userorb

[the-force-awakens]

"Favorite thing is generally Poe Dameron's existence." You're so real for this

I just....love that man so much. He's gotten me through so much - 2015 was an utterly rotten year for me, and Poe Dameron was the bright spot of it. He kept being the bright spot in my life, with the comics being released - it was like every month, he and BB-8 very briefly burst into my life and offered me an escape from everything that was happening in my life at the time.

And I wouldn't know any of my partners without him! Or any of my friends! Cos he's why I stuck around in the fandom!! And how I met everyone! And since I got back into the sequels in 2020, he's been a consistent comfort for me and been the reason i've met even more wonderful people and made more friends.

So, like, yeah I generally love Poe Dameron for existing because he's my favorite character of all time. But I also love him so much because my life would look so much different, and so much poorer, without him.

#ask box #userorb #'talk about poe dameron and be normal about it' challenge failed #he really means SO much to me

[poelya]

Sometimes I think about Poe but end up getting distracted thinking about Poe.

I feel like you might understand this

Actually this happened to me last week (Saturday? I think?). I was infodumping in a server a long list of reasons Poe is disabled, and I started to get into my theory about his sensory needs, so I used a behind the scenes/in character shot of him from tros that I won't share here because I didn't make the gif, but I ended up getting.....so thoroughly distracted by my example gif that I completely lost my train of thought.

#asks #userorb #he's dangerous

[the-force-awakens]

Saw a gif set of Poe sticking up for Holdo, and now I'm thinking about how Poe is first to notice not one, yet TWO self sacrifices in tlj

Oh yeah, I think about that a lot. So much so, that I made a gifset about it once. It's something that I think goes over people's heads, by and large, just judging from how they talk about Poe in that movie -- but the sheer fact is, the movie opens with Poe doing the exact thing that Luke does. He goes out, one man against an army to give the Resistance more time to evacuate, by offering himself up as bait.

Poe recognizes a self-sacrifice, because...he's tried it. We see him do the same thing, it just largely gets overlooked because what happens is that it doesn't work. That's the horrifying fact for Poe: he's convinced that the most he can offer the Resistance is his own noble sacrifice, and if in the meantime, he can take down a fleet killer that could kill them all later? That's even better. But instead, Poe survives - Poe survives, again, let us not forget that he's also the only one, save the First Order and BB-8, that night in the village - and instead he has to reckon with the fact that people under his command have died again, while he hasn't.

"Dead heroes, no leaders" in my perspective, tlj is by and large Poe being forced to reckon with the fact that there's more to him and more to this fight than just dying for the cause. One thing I'm noticing throughout my chronological reread of stuff that's about/features Poe heavily, is that there is this desperate need for purpose that guides him, and that purpose seems to truly be to be a soldier, a hero that can pull of last minute miracles, and if he happens to die for the right reasons at least it'll be for the right reasons, and if he gets a little adventure in between, that's even better. That elusive search for that purpose pushes him off Yavin in Free Fall, and he's still struggling to find it when he's with the Defense Fleet in Age of Resistance.

So, Poe's spent majority of his life wanting to be a soldier like his parents. In some ways, he thinks that's what he's best at. When Leia implies that she can see more in him after L'ulo's funeral in the comics, Poe is confused - he can't see that potential in himself. And then even after he understands what she's trying to tell him, in the Enshado arc, he mentions to Snap that he prefers being a pilot, and not have to make the hard calls or moral decisions that command has to - for Poe, he's more than happy to be t he person to jump into the fire and do what's necessary, even if it costs him his own life. He doesn't fear death, he doesn't even fear it in Free Fall when he's just sixteen/seventeen years old, and it's clear that he still doesn't really by the time the movies roll around.

And TFA, he was originally supposed to be the martyred hero. And he still almost is - but that sacrifice is aborted, and suddenly Poe is the survivor of that mission to Jakku. And the First Order is so much larger than any of them could have ever imagined - so he offers himself as bait, to give the Resistance some time. He could have easily died, during that initial run. He strapped experimental tech that hadn't even been tested to his X-Wing, just to give him an edge, so the Resistance could finish evacuating. He was ready and willing to die for them.

And he knows, first hand, more than anyone else in the Resistance, just how big the First Order is. He puts himself between them and the ship he was just held captive and tortured aboard for days - and decides that if nothing else, the dreadnought has to go because it's a fleet killer.

(And sure, no one in that battle went into it for the "right" reasons. Every Resistance officer in that fight wanted a fight. They've lost people, just lost their home, lost their only support - and I've no doubt that's also going through Poe's head.)

But then...Poe isn't the one to make the sacrifice. It's everyone else, and it's on his command. And he knows it was the right call to make, because the Resistance can't be killed by a fleet killer later (good thing, too, since the first order ambushes them) but...he still lost people under his command, and he has to deal with the worst weight of leadership: being the one to survive.

And then he straight up gets grounded. Like, his X-Wing is destroyed. Poe cannot be the kind of hero that he believed he was anymore - that soldier/rebel pilot to run headfirst into things. Now, he's pushed into the role that Leia normally is: the one to stay behind, and trusting an important mission to someone else. Being the person that everyone tries to come back to.

And it results in Poe becoming what Leia knew he could be all along: someone people could trust and be inspired by to follow, to fight for. When the Resistance feels that it can't trust Holdo, they trust Poe. And under the threat of total obliteration, and the knowledge that they're officially the last line of defense between the galaxy and the First Order, and almost dying several times and losing so many people he was friends with and almost losing Leia - I really do think Poe realizes he doesn't want to die, he wants to live for the Resistance, for the galaxy, and not just die for them. He knows, now, that there's more to him than a noble sacrifice, and he sure as hell doesn't want the people who died while he got to live's deaths are in vein (we see that lampshaded explicitly in tros).

Poe recognizes a self sacrifice when he sees one, because it used to be the first thing he'd think to do. But by tros, we see that he cares less about a noble sacrifice, and more about surviving -- which is the biggest hurtle he's maybe overcome, considering how little he's always feared death.

This is already a touch incoherent and rambly because I'm tired, but I think - I think the slightly tragic thing about Poe is that he wanted to be a soldier like his parents. But he got so good at it, that he ended up flying straight into being a leader - and that terrified him, because that meant that Poe had outgrown the purpose he's been seeking his entire life, and it also means that he has to carry a lot more burdens, including the burdens of when his plans go wrong. He can't be the person to die with his squadron, he gets to be the one to survive and carry their sacrifice with him.

#ask box #userorb #this got so incoherent i'm so sorry but i. am tired #sui ideation cw #just in case #my meta

[the-force-awakens]

It's the Poe Dameron yearning hours, Nym

Oh buddy....but Orb, isn't it always the Poe Dameron yearning hours? 😉 but seriously, maybe we wouldn't always be yearning for him if he wasn't so

y'know if he wasn't the actual bonafide cutest cutiepie in the galaxy?

#ask box #userorb #honestly i couldn't even include my favorite shots of him bc my internet SUCKS #on my pc #so let's pretend his little autism face when he realizes the crystal critters are gone is here #and also his 'I KNEW IT' in tros is here #okay? okay

[the-force-awakens]

Sometimes I just think about how pretty Poe is and get lost in thought

boy!!! you and me both (as uh @dameronalone and @hermitmoss can well attest to)! I mean like....

uh. uh what was I saying again?

#ask box #userorb #lomlllll #all of these r my gifs lmaooo I make so many scrap gifs for him it's unreal #also yes they're almost entirely tlj leave me alone