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#whether its platonic or romantic these two are SOULMATES
shadebloopnik · 2 months
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Looking at fandom like a disappointed parent, hands on hips and everything
Why is there so little Zestmilla content? Why are we failing these rocking soulmates-
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cedar-sunshine · 2 months
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my boys are so comically intertwined. They're two halves of one whole but it wasn't a neat split, they're torn remnants of what could have been a person and there's pieces missing and things that they picked up but they're both roughly half of a whole, not cut nearly, but torn apart by hand, sorted into mismatched piles. They were always supposed to be together and they will do everything in their power to avoid this until it happens. It's not sun and moon symbolism, its life and death, day and night, the same font saying two reflected things. They're interchangeable and complete opposites and the exact same
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gojonanami · 3 months
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❝ 𝐃𝐎𝐍'𝐓 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓 𝐀𝐍𝐘 𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐒𝐇𝐀𝐃𝐄 𝐎𝐅 𝐁𝐋𝐔𝐄 𝐁𝐔𝐓 𝐘𝐎𝐔 ❞
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❝ WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU FAKE DATE SATORU GOJO WITH REAL FEELINGS? ❞
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✧ pairing: satoru gojo x sorcerer!reader
✧ summary: you can't help but say yes when your longtime crush asks you to be his fake girlfriend for a year to get the gojo clan to stop arranging marriage proposals for him. but little did you know, he would be doing both of you a favor.
✧ warnings: 18+, nsfw, smut, fluff, reader is the same age as gojo, set during s1 of jjk, fake dating hijinks, drunk! gojo, jealous! reader + gojo, implied satosugu (sorta, i see it more in a soulmate way, whether its platonic or romantic), switch! gojo, oral (f + m), deepthroating, handjob (m), fingering (f! receiving), sex (p in v), creampie, naoya makes an appearance, gojo clan elders suck, gojo's made up clan responsibilities,
✧ wc: 16,043
✧ for my 2k celebration event: item 6 has been sold to @chuluoyi and an anon!
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“C’mon, you don’t know until you try, sweetheart,” 
You run at your temples, you didn’t need to feel burgeoning ache of a headache forming to know it was coming — but you knew it would whenever you met with this blue eyed idiot, “Satoru, the last time you said that, you nearly got me killed,” you didn’t care to re-live him sending you on a mission meant for him to take a grade 1 one curse, only to end up fighting two other grade 2 curses along with it. 
You were lucky you made it by the skin of your teeth — and lucky that Shoko woke up when you showed up at her door, half dead. 
“And this time, there’s no risk of death,” he grins, stirring his sugary drink that counts more as sugar than a drink, “that shows great personal growth, don’t ya think?” 
“I think this conversation shows that just because you’re the strongest doesn’t mean you have an ounce of common sense,” you mutter, as you sip at your drink of choice, “Gojo, I can’t marry you — for one, there would be a risk of death — yours,” 
“Eh you wouldn’t be able to kill me — you’re far too—“ and you raise an eyebrow, daring him to finish that sentence, “kind,” 
You rolled your eyes, “One of the traits you’re looking for in your future partner?” 
“The thing is, you wouldn’t have to marry me at all — it would be a big sham!” He said with a thumbs up, as if that made it any better at all, “just for a couple weeks so I can fool the Gojo Clan into complacency and to stop the search for my future spouse — you’d be sparing the hundreds, no thousands, of possible candidates from facing the burden of my rejection,” 
“And I suppose the fact that the clan would get off your back is just a fringe benefit?” You sigh, “Gojo, why don’t you just tell them you don’t want to get married?” 
“I’ve tried — but the stubborn old geezers won’t budge — I’m caught between a rock and a hard place — and you know me,” his lips curl, “I’m a lover, not a fighter,” 
Yup, you have a headache now. 
“What would we have to do to convince them we were together?” 
Why were you considering this? 
“Dates, a few public outings, meeting the geezers because they would insist, and you would need to show your face around the clan compound,” he lists off, sipping at his drink, “there may be other things, but we’ll cross that bridge when we get to it,” You may jump off a bridge by the time this is over and done with, “what do you say?” 
“I have two questions,” and he leaned back in his chair, back and forth, impatience personified, “how long would we have to do it?” You didn’t want to be stuck in this arrangement for an undisclosed amount of time, but the second question was far more important, “ And why me?” 
“Three months, maybe longer,” you gape at him, “I can pay you?” you raise an eyebrow, “I will pay you,” you sigh, “and choosing you was easy because—“ 
“If you make some sort of joke about me being single, I don’t care if you have infinity, I’ll find a way to murder you,” you grumble. 
“Because you’re a sorcerer, you’re from a minor clan — so you’re an acceptable choice, and I trust you — you’re one of my closest friends,” he adds, for once his words are deprived of any humor. 
And that answer was…almost worse than the joke. The word “friend” stuck in your side like a thorn you could never pull out, festering and growing until it had become a part of you — that ached only when you thought of it. 
Your feelings for him, they were still there? You thought you had discarded them years ago, thought it was safe for you to move back to Tokyo from Kyoto, thought you had finally left that childhood crush behind — dead and buried — but here it was, still stubbornly clinging to life. 
And now it would thrive with new roots, stems, leaves, and buds if you agreed to this. 
He said your name, “Well?” 
He remains as inscrutable as always, But you could never say no to him, could you? “Okay, fine,” it would also help you out in the form of another problem of Naoya Zenin who had been nothing but persistent since you came back…but you didn’t want to dwell on that. Your eyes find Gojo’s again — as they always did. 
It was why you had left for Kyoto in the first place. 
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“Is this really necessary?” you grumbled, as the servants that served the Gojo clan fussed over your clothes — it was a traditional kimono in the colors of your clan — a deep indigo, embroidered with white koi fish that swam along the fabric, embroidered with waves. You supposed you were only grateful that Gojo didn’t leave you to get dressed yourself. 
Gojo watched as they adjusted the obi around your waist, and your eyes remained fixed ahead, but your gaze couldn’t help but wander to him. Satoru Gojo was always unfairly gorgeous — there was a reason people fawned over him even when he had just rolled out of bed without even a once over at his appearance — but those same people probably would have passed out if they saw him as he was now. 
His formal wear was a sky blue — the same as his eyes, a coat draped over his shoulders and loose trousers of snow white that was a nod to hair of the same color. His hair remained unkempt as it always was. 
“Gonna change into that but not comb your hair?” You remark, and he smirks, running a hand through his hair. 
“Well I think if I start being too well behaved, they’ll know it’s fake,” and the word sticks in your chest like a dagger between the ribs, as the servants finally finish with your clothes, and you sigh. 
You straighten yourself, looking at yourself in the mirror, “How is it only been a couple hours and I’m already exhausted?” 
“The suffocating grip of old geezers and their backwards traditions would do that to you,” but his eyes linger on you, “but lucky for you sweetheart, it seems to suit you,” 
“Do you have to call me that?” You murmur, cheeks warming, as you pretend to busy yourself with adjusting your clothes in the mirror. 
“You have to get used to it,” his footsteps draw closer, heart battering against your ribcage as he does — surely, it would break free of its bony cage by the end of this, as he slides a shiny pendant around your neck — a sliver infinity with a singular small blue gem glinting in the middle — “after all, you are mine now, aren’t you?” 
“Gojo, this is—“ 
“Satoru,” he reminds you, as his fingers brush against your neck as he clasps the necklace, “how will it look if someone overhears you calling me by my last name in private?” And your fingers brush against the necklace, toying with the pendant as you positioned it properly, “do you like it? I had it made especially,” 
Especially — the lack of ‘for you,’ stuck out to you, as you force a smile on your lips, “it’s perfect — it will definitely sell the act,” and your eyes can’t find his as he adjusts his sunglasses, “I’m surprised you’re not wearing your blindfold,” you turn to face him, “doesn’t it drain you not to wear it?” 
“I can wear sunglasses sometimes — usually I get strange looks if I wear a blindfold in normal society — and here,” he pulls off the glasses as his cerulean irises seem to pierce your very form, “it reminds these old men who holds the cards here,” it was already hard enough for you to meet Gojo’s gaze as it was, it always felt as if he could stare right through you — and now, it felt as it your entire soul was beholden to him, “and as a bonus,” he draws close again, as he holds out his hand for your own. You resist the urge to bite your lip, inside giving your hand as he wished, and he lifts to his lips, before tilting his head to press the back of his hand to your cheek, “now I can look at my beautiful girlfriend unobstructed by these pesky eye coverings,” 
You scoff, “You always have something to say, don’t you?” As you try and fail to move your hand away, “Gojo—“ 
“A good escort should never let their lady walk in without their hand being held, don’t you think?” And you sigh, as he leads you out of the frying pan and into the fire  — you only hoped you wouldn’t be burned — your eyes sliding to Gojo again, fingers toying with the fabric over your chest — in more than one way. 
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“So you’ve gotten yourself a partner, eh, boy?” the elderly man sits with his eyes closed as he sips his tea, steam rolling off the surface in droves, but he seemed unbothered by the heat — perhaps because of the steam coming out of his ears, “I’m shocked,” you kept your gaze down, only had greeting him upon entering — stating your name and clan, before kneeling beside Satoru on a cushion. 
“Shocked that someone like me could ever find my match? I know I’m truly one of a kind,” lips curled in that smirk that seemed to annoy almost everyone Satoru Gojo knew — including you — but no one showed the level of irritation that this man showed. 
Gojo may be the head of the Gojo clan — but you supposed there were still people he had to answer too, if only due to age and tradition — the two very things Gojo hated the most. 
“Why bother respecting those for aging when they haven’t done anything for me to respect?” he had said flippantly to Yaga one day during a lesson, “I rather die young than live to the age of these old coots without accomplishing a damn thing,” and then Yaga firmly smacked Gojo on the head right after, for disrespecting Gakuganji during the sister school exchange event. 
And you had a feeling this meeting was about to go as well as that class did. 
“Is this serious? Have you proposed?” and you have to keep a straight face, but your cheeks burn. 
“Now, don’t embarrass me and my girlfriend,” his fingers intertwined with yours, “but this is serious — she’s the only woman I want to marry — and I’ll do anything to accomplish that,” he leans forward with a smile, squeezing your hand, “because I love her, and I only will ever love her,” 
His gaze slides from Gojo to you, eyes boring into your skull, “and do you feel the same?” 
You never have been one for lying — lying was an uncomfortable feeling that twisted and turned in your stomach like questionable leftovers that you took a gamble on eating, ones that wanted to come out the same way it went in. But you had learned with time because sometimes it was necessary for a sorcerer to lie, and when it was between telling a lie or dying, you’re forced to become quite adept at things you hate. 
And you had learned, as you meet his hardened look, the best lies had some truth ingrained in them. 
“I do, Satoru and I went to Jujutsu Tech together, and he’s the only man I ever loved,” perhaps it was too much truth, as you forced your voice to be steady, “he’s frustrating, irritating, full of himself—“ 
“You don’t have to be that honest—“ Satoru grumbled. 
“But he’s also selfless, unendingly kind, a great teacher, and a good person, maybe even the best person I know,” you can’t bear to look at Satoru, “and he’s the only man I want to call my husband,” 
The silence lingers in the room for a moment before the old man grunts, “I’ll believe it when I see it,” 
“What kind of answer was that?” You asked as Satoru walked you back to the room, his fingers still laced with yours. 
“It means we have to make him believe it — but he’ll at least stop arranging these meetings for me with prospectives,” 
You raise an eyebrow, “and what will make him believe it?” 
He smirks, as he tugs you a little closer, fingers under your chin, “I could kiss you right now, might sell the act,” 
“No one can see us,” 
“Someone’s always watching,” he murmurs, leaning far too close as your breath catches, eyes widening before they flutter shut and you wait. But instead his lips brush your forehead, followed by a flick, “gotcha,” 
Your eyes snap open in a glare, “Gojo!” And he’s cackling. 
“Satoru,” he corrects, as his hand leaves yours as he opens the sliding door to the room, “you coming?” 
You pout, rubbing your forehead, as you brush past him — this was going to be a long few weeks. 
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“Why do I even have to go to this?” You were being led through a bustling mall, his arm around your waist, as if to prevent you from escaping (good idea). Your lips twisted in a grimace, you allowed him to drag you along, knowing him, he would carry you over his shoulder without a hint of shame (you don’t think he even contained the word shame in his own vernacular), “can’t you go and wear a ring and go by yourself?” 
“A ring is not as good as having you on my arm now is it?” he bumps you with his hip, “plus, we’re not engaged yet, unless this is a proposal,” he raises an eyebrow, and your cheeks burn. 
“Shut up, I’d never propose to you,” he laughs, but it’s almost strained.
“Never propose to me like that right? Because I deserve a better proposal than that,” he sighs, leading you into a store, “come on, we have to find you a nice outfit for the wedding,” 
You glance at the store, your jaw dropping, “Gojo, this store is so expensive, I can’t afford this—“ 
He lowers his sunglasses just to show you that he’s rolling his eyes, “Who said you’re paying, Princess?” You stare at him, slack jawed, while a salesperson comes up to the two of you — though she’s clearly only interested in one of you. 
“Hi, what can I help you with finding today?” her lips curled in a smile, as she twirled a strand of her around her fingers, “I’d be more than happy to assist you,” her gaze completely fixed on Gojo, without the slightest hint of acknowledgment for you to spare. 
You bite back a scowl, plastering on a fake smile, as you lean into Gojo, “My boyfriend is looking to buy me an outfit for a wedding we’re attending — baby, could you tell her what style you want me to wear?” 
Gojo glances at you, a flicker of surprise that is quickly covered up by a smirk, his arm tightening around your waist, “Yes, I have to make sure my sweetheart is looking her best — so can you please find these styles of dresses for me?” You can’t help the smile on your lips as the salesperson shuffles away, lips a thin line rather than the grin she once had. 
“Didn’t know you were the jealous type,” Gojo chuckles, and you roll your eyes, hoping your expression didn’t give your heart away, the feelings you had stuffed into a crevice of your chest that threatened to burst. 
So you choose to turn it on him instead, as you meet his gaze with a small smirk, “I don’t like people taking what’s mine,” 
But he only takes it in stride, only as Gojo can, “I’m yours, huh?” 
You shrug, choosing to hurt yourself rather than let him do it, “at least for the next two to three months,” and your gaze snaps away and looks to the saleswoman as she comes back with a selection, “if you get to choose my dress, I get to choose a suit for you, deal?” 
Gojo raises an eyebrow, but smiles, “Anything for you, princess.” 
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“You just wanted to see me model for you, didn’t you?” Gojo emerges from the changing room in a black button down and white suit coat with a matching white tie — as he tilts his head, “I would say my best suit is my birthday suit,” and you grimace, “oh c’mon, it was a good joke, although—“ 
“Don’t say it’s true,” you lean back, phone in hand as you snap a picture as you did for the last three, “I love to see that self confidence of yours has grown into full blown arrogance,” 
“How can I not be arrogant when I see you snapping pictures of me?” He crosses his arms, the fabric taut and straining over his chest, the top button undone, showing off the adam’s apple that bobs in his throat, “it’s definitely a step up from when you ignored me,” 
You snap from your thoughts, “When did I ignore you?” 
“When we graduated Jujutsu Tech, you’d spend time with Nanami or spend a weekend with Shoko, but whenever I was around, you wouldn’t even reply to a text,” your eyes fall to the floor, chewing your lip, “it wasn’t always like that — I thought we were close,”
It was true — but it wasn’t because you hated him. It was the opposite. You had tried to be his friend, but the more you were his friend, the more it hurt — hurt to see him smile at you like everyone else, hurt to see him with his eyes on the one he wanted, and with his arm around Suguru. 
And you really didn’t hate Suguru —  it was the opposite really — you thought they were perfect, a person who grounded him, made him a better person, and with a much tighter grip on reality than Gojo did — perhaps too tight. Too tight that it shattered apart in his hands, the pieces too far gone to pick out — and too far gone to save him. 
You tried to be there for him — knock on his door when you knew he was home and force him to shower while you and Shoko cleaned up his room. You stayed even when Shoko had long left, holding his hand as he hid his tears from you with his back turned, and you didn’t admit you could hear his nearly silent tears. But eventually, it turned into movie nights, meals shared, and even grocery runs. 
And it became harder and harder to hide how you felt — each minute spent with him was another drop in a bucket that was already overflowing to begin with. At first it had been a crush — an unattainable crush that you were happy to leave at just that. But eventually, it became so much more — you had fallen in love with him, when you really shouldn’t have. Because he didn’t need a partner — he needed a friend. 
“Gojo, I didn’t ignore you—“ 
“I’ve called you sweetheart, did your number change and then magically change back when you came back to Tokyo?” 
But once he had pulled himself together, you were graduating and you requested to be put in Kyoto — your excuse being you were tired being in the city — but to Satoru, you gave no excuse, you quietly left without a word. Because you were really tired of having your heart broken — so you needed space, and you were willing to do anything to get it. 
“Gojo, I didn’t really talk much to Nanami or Shoko when I left either, I just needed space—“ 
“Space from what?” You sighed, parting your lips when his phone rings. He checks it before taking it, “another mission? Yeah, I can leave tonight,” you bit your lip, “send Ijichi to take me to the airport. Yeah, ok,” and he hangs up, “we’ll have to cut this short. I have to go overseas,” 
“How long will you be gone?” 
“Probably just a few days. I’ll be back soon,” you bite your lip, and he tilts his head, “you worried about me, Princess?” 
You flush, opening and closing your mouth, “I am,” and he blinks, seemingly surprised, “come back safe. Text me to let me know when you land,” 
His lips curl, as he ruffles your hair, “I will — and I’ll be back soon enough. Promise,” and he pauses, “you want a souvenir?” 
“You don’t have to—“ 
“I want to,” he cuts you off, and your cheeks warm. 
And just then, he gets a text, “Ijichi Is almost here. I’ll have him drop you back first,” and he turns to change out of his clothes.
“Satoru,” you catch him by the sleeve, and he pauses, “I’m sorry I didn’t talk to you after all of that. It had nothing to do with you, there was just a lot going on—“ he says your name, but you shake your head, “but it won’t happen again, I promise,”
“Good,” he steps back into the changing room, a grin on his lips, “I wouldn’t let you get away this time anyway, sweetheart.” 
“Gojo?” You say again, and he tilts his head, “get the indigo suit,” 
He grins, “and you have good taste, well, of course you do,” he holds the door open, “I am your boyfriend after all.” 
And the door of the fitting room swings shut, and you hope he’s not looking at you, as your cheeks burn, your heart squeezing in spite of every thought of your mind telling not to go there — not to go down that road, but you should have known, the moment you said yes to this plan—
You were already there. 
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You had never known that the buzz of your phone could make you more happy — or anxious. 
But it had been over the course of the last few days. Because you’re probably an idiot, but that wasn’t the point. 
how bad of an idea would it be for me to try this Karanga and Chapati place that Yuta recommended? 
You snorted, Satoru, the last time you had curry — that wasn’t even that spicy, you couldn’t taste anything for a week.
Another buzz, But Yuta said it’s not so bad
You roll your eyes, imagining the pout he undoubtedly has on his lips — Yuta has never seen you cry over a bowl of curry — stick with your desserts, and you chuckle as you add: you may be the strongest but you have the weakest taste buds 
It takes some time for another response to come — and when it does, you realize a grave error on your part was made: never point out any flaw to this idiot because he will take it as a challenge. 
This is Yuta — Gojo-sensei tried it and he’s now in the bathroom. He told me to tell you he’d text you later. 
This was how the last few days flew by — texts with updates about his mission, his work, and his check-ins with Yuta. And the night before he was flying back, just as you were cooking dinner, he called you— 
“Gojo? Isn’t it 2:00 AM there right now?” 
“You learned the time difference for me?” you heard his words slur over the other line, “Sweethearttttt,” I went out with Yuta and Miguel, and I may have gotten a littttttle tipsy,” 
“Isn’t it like 2:00 AM there?” 
He clicks his tongue, “Miguel challenged me to a drinking contest,” and you groan, rubbing a hand down your face, “but they got me back into my hotel room, even though I’m not tired,” he mumbles, as you hear the crinkle of his bedsheets and the rustling of his comforter. 
“Have you drank water? How much alcohol did you have?” 
“Are you worried about me?” he giggles, before sighing, “I’m glad,” 
“Why are you glad?” You hold the phone between your cheek and shoulder as you stir the pan with your dinner currently in it. 
“Because it means you care about me,” he murmurs, “everyone who cares about me always leaves,” he gives a small bitter chuckle, “maybe it’s better for you not to care about me. It’s dangerous to care about someone like me — the type to die young or live far too long,” 
“Gojo—“ 
“Satoru,” he mutters, voice growing thick with sleep, “call me Satoru,” and his soft snores fill your ear as he falls into the sandman’s grasp — a small reprieve from his feelings — while you were left to dwell in them. 
All this time you had been thinking how you felt, what you were dealing with, what you wanted — and all these years and you hadn’t thought about how your actions made him felt. You thought he was beyond any hurt you could possibly inflict — his infinity meant that he was leagues above anywhere you could possibly reach — but it didn’t. 
He wasn’t. He was a person — and when had you stopped treating him as one? 
You texted Yuta: make sure your sensei is lying on his side and make him drink some water. And don’t let Miguel goad him into drinking ever again. 
Yuta: got it. sorry about that sensei — gojo wouldn’t listen
You scoffed, chuckling at how Yuta called you sensei but did not afford Gojo the same courtesy. 
You stayed on the phone with Gojo, hearing Yuta come in and persuading him to drink some water, before he fell back asleep, but even in his drunken state, he wouldn’t give up his phone — Yuta snapping a picture and sending it to you. You laughed when you saw it — loml with a dozen hearts and a picture of you in your obi, clearly taken when you weren’t looking, but it wasn’t those things that made you laugh — it was the way Gojo clung to his phone, fingers wrapped around it desperately, as he slept. 
You stayed on the phone with him all night, even when you went to bed — of course just to make sure he’s fine — the call waking you when it disconnected after reaching the max call time. Your eyes flutter open, glancing at the time — 5:00 AM. And almost like clockwork, your phone rings again, Gojo’s number flashing on your screen. 
You pick up, “Mm, hello?” you yawn, “finally awake sleeping beauty?” 
“Glad you finally decided to acknowledge my beauty,” his voice is gravelly, thick with sleep, and god, you can’t help but imagine waking to this voice every day — “ugh I have a headache,” he murmurs, the crumple you hear must be him burying his face in his pillow because the next question he asks is muffled, “why were we on the phone?” 
“You called me last night after drinking, and refused to hang up after Yuta helped you get settled,” you chuckle, as you hear his groan over the phone, “I got a new contact picture for you out of it, love of my life,” 
“Glad you’re finally on board,” he mutters, growing quiet, “why didn’t you hang up?” 
You pause, “what do you mean?” You ask slowly. 
“You could’ve hung up at any time, but you stayed on the phone, even when you fell asleep,” his voice was soft, “why?” 
“I just,” you bit your lip, you couldn’t lie to him, at least not completely, “I just wanted to make sure you were okay, and you didn’t want to hang up — so I didn’t,” 
He’s silent for a moment, and you almost wish you could sink into the Earth — but he only says, “okay, now what’s the plan for the day, Princess?” 
Your lips curl, “Well my day has not really began yet since it’s 5:00 AM here, so I’m probably going to sleep for several hours and wake up at an hour that is not bereft of god,” 
“You really couldn’t just say ‘ungodly?’” He snorts. 
“Well, 5:00 AM makes me wax poetic, what can I say?” Another yawn parts your lips, “I’m going to sleep,” 
But he doesn’t hang up, “I’ll be here, sweetheart.”  
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You glanced at the time, he’s late. 
Well, he wouldn’t be Gojo if he didn’t make an entrance. You slumped on the couch — even if he was getting home from his mission, there was no guarantee he’d stop by your place to see you. He might want to just go home — or stop by Jujutsu Tech, or be anywhere else. You couldn’t have expectations — expectations were only a  way to be disappointed, a drop from soaring that would only be met with the impact of the cold, unforgiving ground. 
Especially expectations from a fake relationship. You lay on the couch, staring at the ceiling — why were being such an idiot about this? The TV drones on in the background, illuminating the dark of the living room, as you sit barely paying attention to a random rom com you had picked. 
Maybe it was because Satoru had spent the rest of today on the phone with you, even through a security check (warning the security officers not to hang up his call) and at the gate. And then every day after that, he had called and texted you like clockwork — stupid things— good morning and good night, random memes that made him think of you, pictures of his day (including ones of him messing with his students), questions of what sweet you wanted from the shop he had decided to frequent, calls about your day and his own, and hours long conversations about nothing at all. Maybe because you could hear the smile in his voice as he spoke to you — or maybe it was because you were just down bad. 
It was probably the latter. 
You take a throw pillow and pull it over your face. What were you thinking? Falling for your old crush and fake boyfriend a night before a wedding was a trope in a bad rom com that you spent your weekend night watching — it shouldn’t be how you feel. 
“That’s a nice look,” you jump, pulling the pillow away, to be met with Gojo’s gaze hidden behind another pair of sunglasses, “honey, I’m home,” 
You bite back your smile, “one, this isn’t your home, and two, how did you get inside?” 
“It’s pretty easy when you can teleport, you should try it sometime,” he sits beside you, more like collapses as he falls into the couch, his head resting against the top, “although if someone moved in with me, it’d be much easier,” and you laugh. 
“Shouldn’t you ask a girl out before you ask her to move in?” he shrugs, his arm resting across the top of the couch. 
“I’m anything but traditional,” he sighs, glancing at the TV, “what are we watching?” 
“A bad rom com,” 
He snorts, “watching it to mercilessly pick it apart?” And you raise an eyebrow, “what? I did stay awake for some of those movies— it was some of my favorite memories during that time and some of the only times I could actually sleep,” 
“Yeah, it was a nice way for both of us to turn our brains off for a bit,” you glanced at him, “thought it’d be nice for us too,” his gaze slides to you curiously, “I know there’s been a lot on your mind — with itadori and the special grades,” 
He sighs, running fingers through his hair,  “Yeah, old geezers seem to cause problems in all parts of my life,” you snort, “can’t believe they’d try to do away with Itadori while I was gone,” 
“They don’t see anyone as innocent — they see whether you’re an asset or a threat, unfortunately, they see Itadori not as the former,” you shake your head, as your eyes stare at the movie flashing on the screen, but you don’t really watch, “they’re too far gone to see the innocence of children,” 
“You sound like Kento,” and your eyes meet his, his cerulean gaze already on you, his sunglasses discarded on your coffee table. 
“Funny, thought I sounded like you,” he blinks a moment, “Satoru, you’re all about preserving the youth of children — that’s why you saved Megumi, Yuta, and Yuji — even when you had every reason not to,” 
“How could I not? Youth belongs to the young after all,” a wistful smile on his lips, “i don’t want the same to happen to them that happened to us,” 
“To us,” you repeat, a sharp pain sticks between your ribs at the flash of Haibara’s smile and the whisper of Suguru’s laugh, “more like to them,” 
“Yeah,” a silence falling over the two of you as the white noise of the TV filled the quiet, “but sometimes I think we went down along with them,” 
You shake your head, “I think a part of us did — a part of us will stay there—“ frozen in time and seeping like poison in our bones, “but we’re still here,” you risk to toe the line you’d never cross, your fingers brushing his, “and it’s not over for us,” 
And his eyes flicker to your fingers threaded with his, as his fingers squeeze yours slowly, the corner of his lips quirk upwards, as you stretch and sit up, fingers falling away from his, a yawn on your lips, “should we get some sleep?” 
“Come on, let’s finish the movie,” he murmurs, even though sleep seems to weigh heavily on his body, eyelids fluttering shut as he turns to you, cheek pressed against the couch, “hey,” he murmurs, “it wasn’t the movies that let me relax,” and you can hear the unspoken meaning in those words — but that was the problem. 
It was unspoken. 
Your fingers twitch, wanting nothing more than to brush your fingers against his cheek — but you can’t. 
You’d allowed yourself to toe the line you’d long drawn in the sand that you’d built into a wall — you had even allowed yourself to stir a few bricks from its place, but you couldn’t cross it. Not now. 
Your eyes are growing heavy. Maybe not ever. 
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Your neck hurts. 
The first thought you have as you rouse into aching consciousness. Why was it so bright? Did you forget to draw your curtains? You draw an arm over your face, already dreading the waking hours, until you realize it’s your day off, and you sigh, relaxing into your bed. 
Or what you thought was your bed. 
Except your bed couldn’t move, nor could it pull you closer. But now something or someone was, an arm around your waist with movement behind you that made breath warm your ear. And you probably would have screamed, if you hadn’t heard the familiar voice whisper your name in your ear. 
Gojo. 
Gojo??? 
Your head slowly turned to be met with the strongest sorcerer very much passed out, half behind you, half on top of you — his blue eyes hidden under his eyelids for once instead of any covering that he used to protect himself. His snowy white locks brushed against your skin, the close proximity doing nothing to alleviate your feelings — you had only hoped you could see one flaw, one ick, and maybe you’d be done. But on Satoru Gojo? The man born to be perfect — the same one who sang karaoke for the first time as a teen only to be so incredible that it moved your server to tears? 
You really should have fucking known better. 
Your breath caught, and you wondered if it was possible to die from embarrassment—if no one had, you would surely be the first case. You were always a trail blazer. 
And you tried to shift again, if only to maneuver yourself out of this situation, but he moved along with you, seeking out the contact he was losing. And this only ended with him lying on top of you, his head buried in the crook of your neck, and his legs straddling one of your legs— and then you felt it — a very distinct bulge pressed against your thigh. 
Fuck. Your. Life. 
He mumbled in his sleep, nose brushing against the hollow of your neck, drawing another shiver from your body. You had a rare opportunity to touch him — didn’t you, no infinity between the two of you — just him and you. You were in a position probably many desired to be in — admirers and enemies alike (neither category being mutually exclusive). You supposed old habits die hard — and so did old crushes. 
Could you let yourself enjoy this for a moment? Enjoy the feeling, no matter how real it never would be? Maybe it was wrong, but — your eyes fluttered shut as your arm wrapped loosely around Gojo — you certainly didn’t want to be the one to wake up first. 
And you weren’t — your eyes flutter open to movement, and your eyes meet cerulean eyes, lips parted in surprise, “Morning,” he manages, a flush of pink coloring his cheeks, “did we fall asleep?” 
“I guess we did,” you bite your lip, “are you going to—” 
And he blinks, before scrambling off of you, “Sorry,” he mumbles, as he turns away to fidget with his phone. 
“Guess that was one very boring movie,” you murmur. 
“Or I was in a very comfortable bed,” he replies with a smirk that turns to a grimace. 
“What is it?” 
“Naoya Zenin is making an appearance at the wedding we’re attending tomorrow,” and you groan, as he raises an eyebrow, “how many proposals had he made you?” 
You scoff, “Proposals? More like propositions,” you shake your head, already aching from the sleep you had barely shaken off and now it had graduated to a shooting pain that made your eye twitch at the thought of that man, “he’s offered to do me the ‘honor’ of being the next heir’s husband half a dozen times. If he ever becomes the head of the Zenin clan, I may help Maki annihilate them myself,” 
Naoya Zenin — the most pretentious and egocentric man you had the displeasure of meeting. Even his pretty face could do nothing to fix his hideous personality ridden with misogyny, hatred, and spite. And you’d been offered his hand in marriage half a dozen times due to your lineage in a lesser known clan family with a unique cursed energy. It was a strategic move to try and secure his place — as was every move he made — he had no room for anyone he deemed useless to his plan. 
Unfortunately, you did not fall into that special category.
“That won’t happen,” Gojo replies, texting on his phone, “plus, he’s too weak to force that to happen — not to mention he’s a first class prick,” 
“You say that, but you basically propositioned me,” you teased, as his eyes flit up from his phone, as you rise from the couch, “quite the proposal you came to me with,” 
He pauses a moment, a small smile on his lips, “one, i don’t recall proposing, and trust me that’s something I’d remember,” and you roll your eyes, “and two, aren’t you just as bad, since you said yes, sweetheart?” 
“Can you blame a girl wanting a little extra money?” And he locks his phone, drawing close, your breath catching as he lets himself linger for a second too long. 
“Can you blame a man for wanting a beautiful and intelligent woman?” And he’s leaning close, but he leans back, only grabbing his coat from the couch, still slung over as it had been. He spares you a smirk at your bewildered expression, “close your mouth, you’ll catch flies, princess, and what a shame that would be,” you scowl, and he laughs as he heads to the door, slipping on his shoes, with a final glance and grin thrown over his shoulder as he opened your door, “I’ll see you tomorrow night.” 
Right. Tomorrow. The wedding. 
Fuck. You were so screwed. 
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KNOCK. KNOCK. 
Fuck. You scrambled from your vanity as you finished putting the finishing touches on your look for tonight. You didn’t think Satoru Gojo of all people could ever be on time, but you supposed there was a first time for everything. 
You slipped the dress over your head, careful not to smear your makeup or mess up your hair. You were starting to regret not having the Gojo family’s attendants get you ready for this event, if only so you could have turned your mind off for this time. But you knew all too well that your mind could never give you a break — with all of that free time came free real estate for your anxiety to set up camp and put down roots for all the things that could possibly go wrong. So it was better this way, as you reach for the ties on the back of your dress — of course, maybe if you had let yourself be helped, you could actually have someone to tie your corset back on this dress. 
Another knock. 
“Sweetheart?” You hear Gojo’s muffled voice through the door, “you’re not planning on standing me up are you?” 
You stumble your way to the door, clutching the back of your dress, as you take a breath and throw it open, “Can you tie the back of my dress?” 
Fuck. He looked gorgeous. His hair was parted and combed off to the side, a deep blue suit coat and a crisp white collared shirt tucked into a matching suit pant. A pair of sunglasses were tucked into the chest pocket of his jacket in front of a white pocket square. 
“No hello, ‘can you tie my dress?’” Gojo tilts his head, his eyes graze over your appearance, as he steps inside and closes the door behind him, “turn around,” And you do, fingers still clutching at the fabric at the back of your dress, cheeks burning as you do, “gonna have to let go, and let me help you, sweetheart,” 
You slowly let go, but his warm fingers brush against the skin of your bare back as he holds the dress up from slipping, carefully lacing the corset, “I was right, blue is your color,” he murmurs, as he tugs lightly at the strings, “let me know when it’s tight enough,” 
“It’s good now,” you sigh — though the corset wasn’t as tight as your chest now, you face him now, trying to adjust your hair. 
“Let me,” one hand cups your chin gently, your breath catching and you can only hope he can’t feel your pulse through your skin. His fingers run through your soft tresses, your eyes unable to meet his — but you wonder if he can see right through you anyway — “you’ve never been good at asking for help,” 
“Look who’s talking,” you glare at him, as he chuckles, “well, I asked you didn’t I?” 
“Why did you ask me?” You raise an eyebrow, “I’m sure you could have asked anyone,” 
“Well, I didn’t want just anyone,” he murmurs, fingers tracing the blush you had lined your cheeks with, “I wanted you,” 
“Why?” And he parts his lips, a soft smile that pulls at his features — was it a hint of pink across his cheeks. 
“Because—“ and your phone goes off — a reminder with the time of the wedding. And the moment’s broken, as reality settles over you again, “We’ll be late,” 
“I don’t mind being late,” and a heat burns from his touch, from the tips of your fingers to the his fingers leave your cheek, warmth fading as quickly as it came, but he offers his hand, “but if it’s for you, I can be on time,” and your fingers find his, interlacing, before he tugs you close, his arm around your waist, “as long as you stay by my side.”
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You never were one for weddings. At least not one like this. 
A stuffy event held in an extravagant manner — a large banquet hall for the reception, but now the guests roamed the gardens the hall opened out into — lush greenery serving as a perfect backdrop for this wedding — a distant branch of the Zenin family was marrying, which meant all of the main clans were invited to attend. Including several elders of the Gojo clan. 
And now you were being subjected to this as well — several dozen eyes on you — all due to the man whose arm you were on. His arm wrapped almost protectively around your waist, his lips nearly brushed against your ear when he whispered in it, letting you know just exactly who was coming over. 
“I didn’t think you were one to care for remembering these things,” you wave at the couple that just left the two of you, his fingers grazing the skin behind your ear as he tucked a stray strand behind it. 
“I usually don’t care, but I know it’d make you uncomfortable otherwise, especially among all these people,” he smirks, his fingers finding yours, and squeezing, “plus, we need to make a good impression, don’t we?” 
“I think we’re making an impression just by being together,” you murmur, and he raises an eyebrow, “everyone’s staring — didn’t you notice?” and he shrugs, a sly smile on his lips. 
“Didn’t notice,” he tilts his head, his eyes fixed on you, “I was too busy looking elsewhere, I guess,” 
Your cheeks burn, but as your lips part to respond, you see him walking over to the discreet corner you had parked yourselves in,  “Fuck,” you mutter under your breath, your fingers tightening around his. 
Naoya Zenin strides over in a black yukata kimono, his silver hair pushed back, his lips twisted in a slimy smile that made your skin crawl, your name leaving his lips, “it’s been far too long, you’re looking lovely,” his eyes raked over you like hot coals, “though the company you keep—” 
“Has improved markedly,” Satoru’s lips curl in a grin, “do you have business with my girlfriend?” 
Naoya raises an eyebrow, “Girlfriend?” 
Satoru’s arm tightens around your waist, “I didn’t realize you went hard of hearing — I know your hair had started to go, but your hearing too—” you hid your snort poorly, Naoya’s sharp gaze flickering between the two of you. 
“I’m younger than you are, and my hair is bleached,” he snaps, “or are those six eyes not sharp enough to see that as well? They certainly aren’t enough for you to have found Suguru Geto before he caused a war,” 
And Satoru’s hurt is imperceptible — a hint of hurt that only shows in the tightness of his jaw for a millisecond, before he’s only giving another laugh. 
“At least I am already the head of my clan, because even if I were without my six eyes,” he smirks, but a certain meanness pulls at his features, “I’m still not as weak as you are—”
Naoya’s expression sours, curdled into a foul scowl, “What did you—” 
“Alright,” you hold up your hands, “Let’s save the dick measuring contest for later, okay? This is a wedding, let’s not cause a scene, ok?” you glance between the two of them, and Satoru pouts — while Naoya seems all too pleased, a grin broken across his lips. 
“This is why you’re the perfect woman — you know how to mediate between men’s egos, and—” 
“Naoya, I said let’s not cause a scene, and you’re two steps away from me causing one right now,” you snap, “I wasn’t interested the first dozen times you asked me when I was single, so why would you think I’d be interested now, when I have a boyfriend?” 
His face flushes red, and you’re not sure whether it’s in anger or embarrassment, “I doubt you’re even really a couple,” he hisses, “I know all about the proposals that this idiot has been getting and the pressure to marry,” he runs his fingers through his hair, “I’m sure you’ll come running to me once he’s done using you—“ 
Satoru surges forward, but you press a hand against his chest, “We don’t need to justify our relationship to you, so think what you want — but even if Satoru and I break up, I rather die single than ever spend a minute with you,” and you look at Satoru, your gaze softening, “and I rather spend be single for the rest of my life than spend another minute without him,” and you slide your eyes back to Naoya, his fists clenched, as you lean in, “so fuck off.”
He opens his mouth to reply, but the staff begin to wave everyone into their seats, and the wedding begins. The two of you sit, a silence falling over as others take their seats beside you. A subtle tension as music filled the air and the wedding proceedings began—but you could have cared less— god what the fuck had you said to Naoya? How had Gojo taken it? Does he know how you feel? Does he think it’s an act? 
Then his fingers find yours, “Thank you,” he whispers softly, managing only those two words before the wedding begins. 
And it dawns on you — it wasn’t what you said, it was the fact you had defended him, your heart aches, it was the fact you had defended him when Naoya insulted Suguru. 
Your eyes stay fixed forward as the ceremony begins — it was never about you — as you pulled your fingers away from him. 
Like it always never was. 
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The wedding ceremony goes by — as does the reception, without much to-do. The only silver lining is that there’s far too much small talk for the two of you to have a moment to talk alone, especially when the two of you spot the Gojo clan elders side-eyeing you from the table of old folks, not to mention Naoya hovering around that same table, the same scowl on his face. The only remark that Satoru whispered as the two of you floated by the table pointedly, a smirk on his lips as he waved and held you close to his side — “one quick hollow purple could solve my problems,” 
You gave a forced chuckle at that — unfortunately not yours. 
And finally, the two of you head home — in relative silence, the drive being short to Gojo’s apartment, where your car was parked. You sigh as he pulls in, “I’ll head out I guess—” 
“Why don’t you just stay the night?” and your gaze snaps to his, the first time all night, “it’s really late, and I have a guest room—” 
“My apartment isn’t—” 
“Your apartment isn’t far, but I thought we could…talk,” and your heart gallops to a start — talking was the last thing you wanted to do. 
“What is there to talk about?” And his fingers brush against your chin, forcing you to meet his gaze. 
“Maybe about why you can’t meet my eyes?” You huff, looking away. 
“Can you blame me? Your blue eyes are freaky,” you grumble, and you can hear the judgment in the silence, a first for Gojo,  “Gojo, what do you want me to say?” 
He stays quiet for a moment, “You don’t have to say anything, just come inside,” So you do — following him inside, the silence hanging over you like a guillotine waiting to slice, “Thank you for what you said—“ 
The door clicks behind him, as you stop, “Gojo—“ 
“Satoru,” he corrects, and you’re shaking your head. 
“You don’t have to thank me, I was just—“ 
“But what you said—“ 
“I said what I had to—“ 
“You didn’t have to say all that, Princess,” his voice grows soft, “you know you didn’t,” and he’s drawing closer across his living room. 
“He was upsetting you,” you murmur, eyes unable to find his again, falling instead to his plush carpet laid against his hardwood, “I couldn’t stand by and let him — I know it hurt when he brought up Suguru—“ 
“Suguru?” he repeats, and your eyes find his, finally, and you find his brow furrowed, “is that what you think I was thanking you for?” 
“What else would you—“ and he’s stepping even closer, your breath stuck in your throat as his fingertips graze your cheek again, “Satoru—“ 
“Did I mention how beautiful you looked tonight?” he murmurs, a soft chuckle in his voice, “you always look beautiful, but tonight in particular, I couldn’t take my eyes off you,” 
“You don’t have to—“ 
“That’s just it, I don’t have to,” his palm slides against your cheek, “I want to — I want to when it’s you,” 
“But, i can’t do this, not like this,” tears burn at the corners of your eyes, water threatening to spill out of a too full glass that had been full for far too long, “not when it will give me—“ you cut yourself off before you cut your own heart out, but he’s only forcing the scalpel back into your hand. 
“Give you what?” 
And you can’t turn back now — you’d turned from this road far too many times, sprinted in the opposite direction only to end up here again — you needed to do this, even if it lead to a dead end cliff, “Give me the wrong idea,” and you’re turning away, but his hand catches you by the wrist, “stop, I—“ 
“It’s not the wrong idea,” and you stop. 
No, it was. It was, right? 
“Satoru—“ and his fingers find your own, as he steps closer, “please, don’t—“ 
“If you want me to really stop and forget about this, I will,” he murmurs, “I’ll turn around and open the door and let you go home right now, sweetheart. I won’t bring this up again,” but you don’t move away, you don’t say anything, so he continues, “but if you don’t want that, and you want the same thing I do—“ 
“And what is it that you want?” And you hear his soft chuckle, his cheek brushing against you, as his fingers tuck your hair behind your ear. 
“I thought that was obvious, but I guess I’ll have to spell it out for you,” he squeezes your hand, as he guides your face to look back at him, his lips curled in a small smile, “I want you,” 
Your breath is shaky, no, no — he doesn’t mean that, “No you don’t,” 
He tilts his head, “You don’t think I don’t know what I want?” 
“Satoru, I don’t want to be a substitute for others—“ 
And his hands are sliding around your middle, pulling you closer, “You think I could ever think of you as a second choice?” 
“But—“ and every doubt from when you were younger wells up, every fear of not being enough — but they are erased away, crumbled into dust, by the way he looks at you — entire multitudes of skies all made to look at you. 
“You keep finding reasons not to do this,” and his fingers skim your cheek, before resting under your chin, “but have you tried finding a reason why we should?” 
“Satoru—“ you can’t help but lean into his touch — god, he was a temptation personified — everything you ever wanted, even when you tried not to want it. These feelings were never fake — so why not give in? Just this once. Your fingers slide against his cheek, and you can feel his skin burn under your touch, “do you have any idea what you do to me?”
“No, sweetheart,” he leans in even closer, your breaths becoming one, “but I’d love to find out,” 
His lips brush yours — it’s chaste, hesitant, testing the waters — he tastes like sugar, and you almost laugh — he tastes like the frosting from the wedding cake that he had swiped a slice of on the way out that he finished before you two had reached his car. His eyes flutter open for half a second, before your lips are crashing to his this time — a new record for addiction? A second maybe and you were too far gone. 
His hands cup your cheeks, one sliding to the back of your neck, as the other slides down to your waist to pull you ever closer. 
“Did you find it out?” You murmur between kisses, lips meeting and parting if only to allow you both a breath. And his snowy eyelashes flutter, as his lips quirk upwards. 
“Think I need another,” and his lips swallow any coherent thoughts you have, his hands slipping down your sides, lips parting again, “another,” he murmurs, a kiss, “another,” 
“How many do you need?” you ask breathlessly, a chuckle caught in your throat, and his lips press desperate kisses along your jaw, a smirk against your skin. 
“Is infinity an answer?” And you laugh, “have to take responsibility — I’m addicted to you,” 
“And if I’m addicted?” His hands squeeze your hips, drawing a gasp from your lips. 
“I’d be more than happy to take responsibility for you, Princess — always have,” 
Your heart beats against the bars of its cage, threatening to burst out — but you couldn’t — not without knowing, “And if you break my heart?”
“I won’t ever break your heart,” he leans down to press butterfly kisses to your cheek, “but even if I do, I’ll put it back together,” 
“Promise?” You murmur, and his lips meet yours again, and again, as he’s leading you towards his bedroom, his fingers running through your hair.
And the door to his bedroom swings shut, “Promise.”  
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“How long are you going to tease me?” you’re grumbling, cheeks hot and eyes averted, the back of your hand pressed against your lips, as Satoru presses needy kisses along your neckline of your dress. 
He looks up at you through his snowy lashes, and you don’t know if you want to slap the smile off his lips or kiss it off, “You’ve been teasing me for years, you can’t give me this time, sweetheart?” His teeth graze the juncture of your neck and shoulder, “plus, do y’know how fun it is to watch you squirm?” 
Slap. It’s definitely a slap. 
“You’re insufferable,” and he smirks when your breath catches when his lips ghost over the swell of your chest. 
“Yet you’re the one who's under me—“ and you try to get up only for him to pin you back down, a pout on his lips, “alright, alright, can’t blame me for wanting to see you squirm, Princess, how many chances will I get?” 
“Only this one if you keep this up,” and he’s finding your lips in a languid kiss, an apology with no words, a smile filled with affection that only made it hard for you to feign annoyance. 
“Then I better make this count,” he’s gently helping you up, turning you around to undo your corset strings — but you wonder if he’s undoing it or tangling it, “why did we choose a dress with such a complicated back?” It’s his turn to grumble and it only draws a giggle from you. 
“Surprised you haven’t hollow purple’d it by now,” 
“Trust me if you weren’t in it, I would have,” he sighs, as the fabric begins to loosen up, slipping off your shoulders. 
“And here I thought you were good at everything,” you chuckle as he helps you shimmy out of the dress, the fabric falling away from you in a small pool around your ankles. Pools of blue rake over your exposed body, raising goosebumps in its wake, as your arms reflexively try to cover yourself, but his hands find your own, easing them away. 
“I’m good at what counts, Princess,” he kisses your wrist, pulse jumping under his touch, nose brushing against it, he hovers over you, as he undoes his tie, fingers tugging at the knot, as he undoes the top button of his shirt, “and I’ll show you.” 
~~~~
Satoru had dreamed of this — of you and him. He knew when he realized it — although it was too late when he did. Maybe it was the night before you left — the night after graduation — before you left — you had fallen asleep watching the movie you had put on. Your lips parted and mouth ajar, your eyes fluttered shut, and you were out. He had leaned over to grab his phone to snap a picture to tease you with later, only for your fingers to grab onto him, your head on his shoulder, a quiet murmur of his name. 
“Satoru,” — not Gojo, as you had always called him. And he knew he wanted to hear you say it again and again. His fingers brushed a stray strand of hair away, his head leaning against yours.
Suguru was everything to him for a time — he had come to Satoru at a time where he thought no one else would ever be able to understand him. No one else would be able to reach him — because how does a person reach for a god? But here you were — and the way your head rested on his shoulder and your lips said his name made him want nothing more than you by his side. 
And when you left — you didn’t reply to his messages, you disappeared, just like everyone else did in his life. He was always left alone in the end — maybe it was his fate. 
But then you came back — came back almost right after Suguru left for good. And that part of his heart that was meant for you began to thrive again and again — as he spent more time with you. 
And god, when his clan started to pressure him to find someone to marry — he wrote them off as he always did. He thought he could ride out the ridiculous proposals and dates they had arranged for him — but as he thought more about who he wanted to spend his time with, who he wanted to see after a tiring mission, and who he couldn’t imagine being without —- 
And he realized it was you. 
“Satoru, don’t tease me,” you pouted, teeth bearing down on your bottom lip, legs spread for him, his eyes flirting between your all too cute expression and the growing wet patch on your panties, “fuck, please—“ 
“Gonna have to tell me what you want, sweetheart,” he presses a wet kiss to your inner thigh, his arm hooked under your knee, your foot pressed against his back, “where do you want me?” 
“You fuck-er—“ the last syllable is a gasp as he kisses your sensitive clit through your soaked underwear, “Toru—“ a whine leaves your throat. 
Fuck, you’re so cute, his fingers toy with the elastic of your panties — and all of this was worth it, worth it to see if these feelings were what he thought they were, worth it to make you smile, and worth to end up with you. 
“How can I refuse you when you say my name like that?” he’s tugging your underwear away, exposing your sipping cunt to a rush of air and his warm breath, “all this f’me, baby?” You mumble something he can’t quite make out, “what was that?” 
Your glassy eyes look up at him, blown wide with lust, “Only f’you, Satoru,” fuck, his dick twitches — he could bust just looking at you. 
“Fuck, baby,” he murmurs, “g’nna make me cum just with your words,” but he diverts his attention to your needy cunt, his long fingers graze over your pussy, collecting the precum on his fingertips, before he pinches your clit. 
“Toru,” you squirm, as he grins down at you, all too pleased. 
“Imagine if the elders could see you like this — spread out for me like a good little wife,” he’s leaning down to kiss your fluttering folds, leaning back for you to see the shiny pre that clings to his lips that his pink tongue darts out to clean off, “sweetest thing I’ve tasted,” 
“Please, Toru, fuck—“ and finally his finger is circling your hole, before sinking in knuckle deep — fuck, you were fucking tight — he could melt from your warmth, pulling him in like a siren to a drunken sailor, “oh my god,” 
“You don’t have to call me ‘god,’ princess,” and he earns a glare from you that fades into an open mouthed moan as he begins to pump his finger in and out, “so good for me,” and he’s adding another finger, the wet squelch of your cunt growing louder, as he reaches a hand down to graze against his erection if only for a little relief. 
He wishes he could memorize the way you looked right now — perfect little lips parted for him, his name and soft pants the only sounds you could manage to make, your back arching into his touch, and the way you moaned when his lips found their way around your clit. 
His tongue circles your clit at first before his lips suck at the hard pearl, fingers parting your dripping folds, finally finding that spot that had your walls giving that telltale spasm, “Toru, I’m close—g’nna cum—“ you whimper, his fingers pistoning in and out of your cunt as he sucks hard at your clit, and you cum, hard, around his fingers, drenching his face and finger alike, as he fucks you through your orgasm. 
You’re beautiful — lips parted and chest heaving, as you moan his name again, “good girl,” he’s murmuring, as your eyes flutter open, to watch him lick his lips and fingers clean, “might get addicted to how you taste, sweetheart,” 
And you’re boneless, but still you’re still reaching for him, pulling him into a languid kiss, his cock twitching as he shifts himself over you, hands pressed into the mattress, his clothed cock rubbing against your drenched folds. 
“Wanna make you feel good,” you mumble against his lips, and he’s pulling back an inch — but unknowingly, he’s given you a mile, as you flip him onto his back. 
You’re a vision — your perked up nipples visible through your bra, halfway slipping off your shoulders as it is, hair a lovely mess, and pretty lips kiss ruined. 
“My turn,” and your lips burn a trail down his jaw, along the curve of his neck and the cut of his collarbone. You take your time, if only to pay him back in full for all the teasing he did, “didn’t know you taste so sweet, Toru,” your tongue drags up his chest, “must be all the sugar you eat,” 
And your lips smile against his abs at the sharp gasp he fails to stifle, “I’ll have you know I’m very sweet—“ and your fingers graze over his clothed erection — his hips buck up into your touch, “I’m known for it,” he hisses, as a giggle escapes your lips. 
“Uh-huh, I’m sure almost everyone would care to disagree,” the tip of his cock strains against the fabric, the dark wet patch growing larger the more your thumb beared down on it, “but I wouldn’t be one of them,” and you’re dragging the fabric down his hips, freeing his cock, your eyes nearly hypnotized by the slight of it, thick beads of precum dripping from the slit, before your gaze finds his again, softening, “because I know how much you do for others — and how much you’ve lost because of it,” you kiss his inner thigh softly, nose brushing against the skin. 
“As long I don’t lose you,” he says softly, “I think I’ll be okay,” 
And your fingers find their way around the base of his cock, drawing a ragged gasp from his lips, before you lean down and flick your tongue against his leaking tip, “I’m not going anywhere, Toru.” 
Your tongue drags a thick stripe up his cock, before beginning to trace along one of his veins, your fingers slipping up to use his pre to rub up and down his length. Your thumb teases his slit, and a hiss leaves his lips, a smirk against his dick. 
“Fuck, sweetheart, you know exactly what you’re doing to me,” his cheeks burn, dusted with pink surely — as he watches you lick the precum that dripped down your fingers onto your wrist, “knew that mouth would be s’fucking good—“ 
“Turns out you don’t shut up even in bed,” and that earns you a cheeky grin that parts into an ‘o’ as his dick sinks into your mouth. He swears he was closer to death than he was when Toji nearly killed him — not that he’d like to remember that man in this moment — but you’d surely be the death of him, and you would be — if he had to spend another second without you in his life. 
Fuck, he looks down at you, eyes half shut, his white knuckled fingers gripping the sheets — you’re gorgeous as you swallow him whole — sucking and licking, nose brushing against his pubes as your eyes water, as you bob along his length from tip to base and back again. 
“S’good for me, so pretty, fuck—” he groans, when his tip brushes against your throat, his fingers finding your scalp to try and ease you off,  I’m s’close princess, g’nna cum—” But your hands only slide to his ass to hold yourself against him, as his dick twitches in your mouth, and your fingers drift to his sack while your tongue flicks along his slit and he’s done. He’s cumming down your throat, hot release painting your mouth.
He’s watching you with half lidded eyes pull away from him— a string of cum and spit strung between your lips and his dick, before beginning to drip from the corner of your mouth. And fuck, it’s enough to make him hard all over again. You lean over him, wiping the release from your lips, as you kiss up his body. 
“Now who’s good at everything?” and he huffs out a chuckle. 
“I stand corrected — actually, don’t think I’ll be standing for a while after that but—” and he’s finding your lips in a kiss, tasting himself you, his teeth grazing your bottom lip, as your fingers find his erection again, stroking it, before he’s flipped you onto your back. He runs a hand through his snowy locks, a smile on his lips, “don’t think you’ll be doing much standing after this either,” 
“So full of yourself,” you roll your eyes. 
“That’s what you’re going to be full of in a second—” 
“Oh my god—” and your laugh dies on your lips as he starts to tease your entrance with the head of his cock, “Toru,” you whine, as he watches your needy cunt flutter around nothing as he drags his length up and down your dripping hole, watching your releases mix, “please—” 
“So polite,” he hums, as he leans down to press a kiss to your lips, “now how can I refuse that?” and he begins to sink his length into your cunt, warm walls nearly pulling his cock in deeper, as he groans your name, “s’perfect, s’good for me, princess, made for me,” and inch by inch, until he’s finally bottoming out. 
“Toru, ngh, s’big—” you gasp, lips parted in a silent moan, as you pull him even closer, face buried in the crook of his neck, but his fingers tugging your hair to show your face. 
“Let me see you,” he murmurs, as his lips meet yours in a sloppy kiss as he continues to thrust into you — his hips meeting yours, the wet squelch and skin slapping echoing in his ears. A gasp parting your lips as you pull apart, your head thrown back in a moan as your walls flutter around him as his tip breaches that one spot inside you. 
“Haa, I’m close, Toru,” you groan, and he’s nodding, his fingers reaching between your bodies to find your clit. 
“Cum for me, pretty girl,” and you do — cumming hard, as he notches himself deep inside you, before spilling inside you, his hot release deep in your pussy. He’s moaning your name, as your bodies slow and his fingers cup your cheek gently, and his lips find yours. 
He slowly rolls off of you, your warmth leaving him for a moment, before he’s pulling you close again, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead. 
“Is this a dream?” you mumble, eyes fluttering shut, and a small chuckle leaves his lips, legs entangled. 
He buries his face in the crook of your neck, “If it is, I hope I never wake up, Princess.” 
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Your body aches — that’s your first thought as you stir into consciousness. Fuck, why does you feel so sore? Your eyes try to flutter open, but the sunlight blinds you — a soft groan leaves your lips. You shift, as you stretch, your back aching and muscles tight, but then someone moves behind you, an arm wrapping around your waist. 
Your eyes shoot open, as your head slowly turns to find looking at Satoru. A gasp is caught in your lips. 
Fuck, it was real.  
You slowly turn to face him, his soft breaths leaving his pink lips — god he’s so gorgeous. His pretty white eyelashes resting against his skin, lips parted ever so slightly, and his snowy hair askew and mussed. Your fingers ghost over his cheek lightly — how many people have seen him asleep like this? How many had seen him with his guard down? You knew he didn’t sleep nearly enough, you were surprised he was still asleep — but, your cheeks burned, you both did spend half the night awake. 
But there were more pressing things to think about — what did this mean? You chew on your bottom lip, he had said he wanted you — but what did he want? Just last night? Or something more. 
“I can’t sleep with your thoughts grinding so much,” he mumbles, heat rushing to your cheeks, he’s burying his face in the crook of your neck, “why are you awake so early?” His nose brushes against your neck, his lips pressing softly against your pulse. 
“I just woke up,” you murmur, a small shiver running up your spine, as you relax into his touch, your fingers running through his soft locks, “did all my thinking wake you?” 
“Yes, and you’ll have to compensate me,” and you snort. 
“You’re rich, like old money rich,” he’s pressing sweet kisses to your skin, heat climbing up your body. 
“Money isn’t what I want,” he nuzzles you, nose brushing against the skin of your neck, “wonder what other ways you can repay me,” 
You chuckle, humming at his touch — god even the simplest of touches has your logic up in ash, “I’m sure you can figure out some other methods of payment,” 
And his lips find yours again — it’s a lazy morning kiss, soft and slow, but not bereft of any of the passion from the night before. His fingers slide down your body, as he pulls you impossibly closer. 
“My preferred method of payment wouldn’t have us leaving this room until tomorrow morning,” his lips curl in a smirk, “but I’ll collect my charge tonight — how about I make us breakfast?” 
“You can make breakfast?” You raise an eyebrow. 
“I know how to scramble an egg,” he shrugs, and you snort only for him to pout, and you smile, your fingers brushing against his cheek, before your thumb runs down his lips. 
“How about we make breakfast together?” 
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“Was that really your first time making tamagoyaki?” you raise an eyebrow, as you pick up a piece of the rolled omelet between your chopsticks.
“Promise,” and you bite it — it was perfect — the texture, the taste, the seasoning. And you stare at him, an eyebrow raised. 
“Either you’re lying or you really are good at everything,” you mutter, and he grins, as he takes a bite of his food — a sweeter tamagoyaki he had made for himself, far too smug for his own good. 
“I think I proved that last night, Princess,” and you nearly choke on your food. And you chew thoughtfully — you two hadn’t even breached what last night meant yet. You had simply been dancing around it, or at least you had. You didn’t want to be the one to bring it up — or rather, you picked up another piece of tamagoyaki up, you didn’t know how to, “what’s going on in that head of yours?” 
And your eyes snap up, “What do you mean?” 
He tilts his head, “You’re not hard to read — you keep thinking about something,” and his lips curl, “last night?” Your hesitation gives you away — and he only smiles wider, “should I refresh your memory?” And your cheeks are burning, and he chuckles, “come on, sweetheart, let’s just talk,” 
You bite your lip — you needed to do this, you couldn’t run away from how you felt, not again  — your fingers fidgeting with your chopsticks, before you place them down on your bowl, “What did last night mean?” 
And his lips curl, but this smile he has is softer, “What do you think sweetheart? Do you think I’m really the—“ And his phone rings, and he picks up his phone, eyes flickering to the caller, and you wave him off, “you can take the call,”
He sighs, “One second,” he gets up to speak, and he hangs up a few minutes later, “text me a location,” 
“Who was that?” And he’s shaking his head, a sigh on his lips, his hand on the back of his neck. 
“The ever breathing and ever irritating geezers want me to meet them to speak about something involving the clan,” he meets your gaze, a flicker of an emotion in his eyes — a drop of water that disappears into the sea as quickly as it formed, “and it’s a good opportunity for me to discuss something I have been wanting to speak with them about,” 
“Something?” and his lips quirk in a small smile. 
“I’ll be back soon enough to explain, sweetheart,” he walks over to you, “will you wait here for me? Think I’ll be able to come back faster if I know you’re here waiting for me,” 
And you can’t help the small flutter your treacherous heart gives, “The great Satoru Gojo will rush for me?” 
“Oh, he would rush day and night if it meant he could come home to you,” and his fingers find your cheek, drawn like a magnet — why was it you could never look away from him? Even in a crowd, your eyes always found his gaze. 
And you’d go to him — like a moth to a flame, “I think I’d prefer just Satoru,” you lean into his touch, your hand over his, “I do owe him after all,” 
“You do,” he leans forward to press a kiss to your forehead, before he’s pulling away, a smile on his lips, “consider that a deposit.” 
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You didn’t know what to do with yourself. 
Alone in Satoru’s place — you didn’t know what to do with yourself. He had left right after breakfast, and he told you where the TV was, books, and told you could order anything or use anything you needed. But, this place was so him — each place you went, there was just another reminder of him that seemed trail after you, but at the same time, without him, it was like a shell of a place — no soul present. 
And you supposed the soul wasn’t present. 
You ended up back in the bedroom, crawling back under the covers. Fuck, they even smelled of him — you squeezed your eyes shut.
You really didn’t know what you were doing — did you? 
You laid on your back. What were you supposed to make of what happened last night and this morning for that matter? Was this real now? A real relationship with Satoru — you turned over on your stomach, pulling the covers over your head — you could barely imagine it. 
And your phone goes off, as you reach for it blindly on the nightstand. But it wasn’t the white haired sorcerer you hoped it was — your eyebrows knit together — at least you didn’t think it was. A text from a number you don’t recognize — and a picture to top it off from the preview. 
You nearly deleted it — only to spot a familiar mop of white in the picture. 
Your blood runs cold at the sight. Satoru? He was at a restaurant with — a woman? You didn’t recognize her, but his hand held hers, picture taken mid laugh. Your cheeks burn — no, no — there had to be an explanation. 
A text now — Want to see what your boyfriend does in his spare time? Is he done using you now? 
There’s only one person who’d text like that. 
Naoya, how fuck did you even get this picture? You stare at the photo — have you fallen so far in your clan that you have the time to stalk Satoru now? 
He replied, it’s not my fault that they are dining in a Zenin owned business. 
Another picture — Satoru and her were hugging, his arm around her waist, far too close to be friendly. 
You don’t think — you call him. It rings and rings, but no answer — the cut to voicemail makes your heart sink. 
Another text — even if you don’t believe me, do you think this will be the last of your problems? When you’re Satoru Gojo, anyone close to you will have a target on their back — if only to use your blood to paint one on his head. 
You knew you couldn’t trust this. You knew there was an explanation. You knew Satoru wouldn’t do this to you. 
But even still, you wished you could tell your heart that. 
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“What is this?” Satoru was led to a table at the restaurant the old geezers had chosen — but there were no wrinkly old cranks in sight. Instead, there was a woman. 
“Are you Satoru Gojo?” And he raises an eyebrow, hands sliding into his pockets. 
“The one and only, now I don’t suppose the old fools of the Gojo clan turned into a woman — so who are you?” She swirls the glass in her hand, before downing the liquid in one go. 
“Figures they had to lie to get you here — seems like we’ve been set up,” she gestures to the chair in front of her, “I’m Airi,” and he takes a reluctant seat, “I was told this was a meeting for us to meet for a potential engagement,” and he scoffs, he should have figured it was something like this, “but judging by the look on your face, you didn’t know that,” 
“I was expecting to meet 
I suppose we’re on the same page,” 
He tilts his head, “Really?” 
“Gojo, you may be a catch, but to me, you’re nothing more than a potential knife to my neck,” she places her glass down, leaning back in her chair, “and plus, I have someone I’m interested in,” and her eyes slide down, “and judging by the bite mark on your neck, you do too,” 
He pays it no mind, a laugh leaving his lips at the thought of you waiting for him at his apartment, “I do,” and he sighs, pushing his chair out, before getting to his feet. “and I have to get back to her,” 
She follows suit pushing out her own chair, rising, a waiter walking by, and she trips. It’s a reflex, he catches her by the wrist and by the waist, steadying her. 
“Sorry,” she pulls away immediately, looking back for the waiter, before biting her tongue, “fucking waiter tripped me,” the two of them glance around, but see no one, “I’ll have to talk to my grandfather’s advisors about this. No one trips the granddaughter of Naobito Zenin,” she mutters, and Satoru’s eyes snap to her. 
“You’re a Zenin?” And it clicks, the wedding, “who arranged this meeting?” 
She tilts her head, “My father, but he heard about this from my cousin, Naoya—“ 
He checks his phone — and he sees a missed call from you. 
Fuck. It was a set-up — in both ways. 
“I have to go,” and he can only hope you wouldn’t do the same to him when he came back. 
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Satoru calls you, but you don’t pick up. You can’t bring yourself to stare back at the photo he had set as his contact photo — the picture Yuta had taken of him clutching at his phone with your picture on his screen. 
You needed to talk to him in person. 
And it’s not long before he’s back home — practically teleporting at your feet. 
You swear, stumbling and he grabs you, tugging you close, “Got you,” he smiles, tugging off his blindfold for you to see his eyes — the startling blue that you still couldn’t navigate without drowning in its depths, “does that mean I can keep you?” and you want to pull away, you want to run, but you can’t help but melt into his touch, your fingers gently clutching at the front of his shirt. 
“That depends on whether I’m the only person you’ve said that to,” and you look up at him, his brow furrowed, “and held like this,” 
“The meeting today, it was supposed to be with the elders — I was going to discuss our relationship again but—“ you show him the pictures on your phone, and his brow knit together, “how did you—“ and he doesn’t finish his sentence before he realizes, “it was a set-up,” 
“I know,” and relief washes over features for a moment, but your eyes can’t meet his, your lips a thin line. 
And he glances at the photo again, seeing the one where he’s holding Airi, “She tripped, sweetheart, trust me—“ his hand cupping your cheek, his thumb brushing the length of your cheek, “I don’t want to hold anyone but you,” 
“I know Naoya and the Gojo clan probably set this up,” you whisper, leaning into his touch, “but—” you pull away from him, every step away from him a fissure in the foundation of this bridge built, “I don’t think I can do this anymore,” 
And he’s blinking, “Why?” 
“I’m not good enough,” you’re shaking your head, stepping back as he steps forward, “I hurt you by leaving, and I was this close to doing it again—” 
“But you didn’t—” 
“And your clan doesn’t want us together, and I don’t know, I feel even if we’re together,” the words that leave your lips break your heart and his, we’ll only hurt each other in the end,” 
“Why do you always push me away when we get close?” 
“No I don’t—” 
“You don’t think the sorcerer that’s an expert at pushing others away — wouldn’t know if he’s getting pushed away?” 
“This isn’t working out,” you cut him off, as the slice cuts through thin air — but it’s not your head that goes rolling — it’s his heart, “we should stop — I think your clan has been convinced,”
He’s silent for a moment, before he replies, “well, I haven’t been convinced,” 
You scoff, his hands by his side, as his quiet footsteps approach you, “convinced of what?” 
“Convinced that,” he stops in front of you, “you don’t feel the same way I do,” Your breath catches, as his fingers find your cheek, “all these years, sweetheart, and you didn’t know?” 
“But,” you can’t process this, it doesn’t make sense, “but Suguru—“ 
“Was important to me yes,” he murmurs, “but it’s been years, and it doesn’t mean I can’t have deep feelings for someone else — especially when I’ve had them for over a decade,” 
“You—“ was this real? As he stood before you, in his living room low lights, sunlight streaming in from his windows, “what?” 
He laughs, “Didn’t know it was possible to render you speechless, sweetheart — guess there’s a first time for everything,” he steps over your missteps with the same ease he does everything, “I really do have to spell everything out for you, don’t I?” The back of his fingers ghost over your cheek, “I’m in love with you—“ 
“No,” you’re shaking your head, and his face falls, “Satoru, we can’t—“ 
“But—“ 
“Your clan doesn’t approve of me, they won’t stop trying to break us up, and I could put you in danger,” you murmur, “they could use me against you — just like Suguru did,” you couldn’t bear the thought of that, “and is that worth it? Worth it for something that may not be real?” You ask the question you’re afraid of asking him — of asking yourself — “was it ever real?” 
And he’s still trying to reach for you, despite it all — he knows it’s dangerous to be around him, he knows anyone close to him is in danger — and that’s why he was okay when you left. If only you’d be safe — but he knew that if he always played it safe, he would never be happy, “It’s real to me,” 
“It’s not to me,” you turn towards the door, “I’m sorry.” 
And this time he doesn’t stop you. 
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It’s for the best. 
That’s what you tell yourself. The same thing you say when you’re leaving his place. The same thing you say the next morning you wake up with only a pain in your chest and a dull ache in your head. The same thing when you accept a long mission overseas. 
It was for the best. 
Then why — then why did you think of him? Each and every day, every minute, every second. But it was for the best. He was safer without you, it was easier without you, it was better — better and yet each day seemed to drag when you couldn’t talk to him. And your notes were filled with unsent texts to him — and your mind was filled with nothing but memories. 
And you couldn’t touch memories nor could you talk to them. 
Several months later, you’re sitting in a plane, watching the animation of the plane fly back towards Tokyo. You had been checking in with Yaga several times a month, but you hadn’t heard a thing from Satoru. 
Or rather, Gojo. Not that you expected to — not after what you did. 
And soon enough, you’re arriving home — heading inside your home to find a bunch of your mail had fallen out of your mailbox, knocked out of the rickety box from the storm the night before. You pick up the drenched mail between two fingers that was stuck to the sides of your walls, as you fumble with your keys to open the door. Your suitcase and mail fall to the fall as you close the door behind you, sighing. 
Fuck. You were home. 
You dragged your suitcase inside, picking up the mail off the floor. You collapsed on your couch, tossing the wet envelopes onto the table — when a name catches your eye. 
Gojo? 
You pick up an envelope — the frilly envelope doing nothing to protect the contents inside — you barely can make out any of the text, except the faint inked kanji of his name. 
You gingerly open the envelope, peeling out the insides — and your heart drops. 
Is this an invitation? The faint text was blurred and smudged from the rain — the contents all but faded and you could only make out three things — ““marriage,” today’s date, and bits and pieces of what you thought was an address. 
Satoru was…getting married? 
It felt like logic had fled your mind and panic took its place — as you looked up the parts of the address that you were able to decipher. And you found it — it was a popular venue not far from here. 
You didn’t think — you grabbed your keys and drove. 
You couldn’t let him get married, no, no — you had made a mistake when you left. You thought he was better off, you thought it was for the best — but it wasn’t. It couldn’t be when your chest hurt like this — felt as if your heart was splitting in two with a sword stuck between your ribs. It couldn’t be because you pushed him away because you were scared — scared of getting hurt again, scared of hurting him, scared of being with the only person you ever had loved. 
Basically, you pulled up to the venue, you were an idiot. 
You hadn’t changed, you hadn’t showered off your who knows how long of a flight, and now you were on the steps of a wedding venue that Satoru was getting married at. You froze before the doors. 
You couldn’t do this. He didn’t deserve to have his day ruined by you — not when you had ruined enough. If he had found someone else to spend his life with — whether it was arranged or not, he deserved to be happy. 
Even if it wasn’t with you. 
So you step down — walking off a distance to watch when the couple emerged — which judging by how dark it was and how staff were already almost done setting up — would be any minute now. 
So you wait. 
And finally when the doors swing open, you steel yourself — knowing it would do nothing, nothing to shield you from the pain of seeing—and your eyes find the groom. 
That wasn’t Satoru. 
He certainly had the white hair, but he did not have his blue eyes — he had a lovely bride regardless, who looked at him the way you had always looked at Satoru. Was that the look you had hidden away for so many years? And why were you still hiding? 
And your eyes find Satoru almost instantly — as fast as his eyes find you seemingly, as your name escapes his lips — as he parts through the crowd to your side. He’s wearing the other suit he had tried on — the white suit that had been your second favorite — his white locks parted and combed to the side, but still impossibly unkempt as they always were. 
“You got my invitation?” you blink, tilting your head. 
“But you—what?” and his brow furrows. 
“Don’t tell me you lost your ability to read and speak while overseas, princess,” and a small chuckle escapes your lips as you shake your head, wringing your hands. 
“Satoru, the invitation was wet because of the rain, I thought—” your voice wavers, glancing away as your cheeks burn, “I thought you were getting married.” 
He raises an eyebrow, lips curling, “And you were about to burst in and object?” 
You roll your eyes, but even so you can’t meet his gaze,  “Satoru—” 
His smile only grows wider, “What were you going to say? A passionate speech about how you’re still—” And you’re tugging him close by the collar, and his breath catches, your name leaving his lips. 
“I’m in love with you, Satoru,” your voice is steady as you speak, your hand sliding to his cheek, “I always have been — I was just afraid to admit it, I didn’t want to hurt you — whether it was by my own hand or not,” and his brow furrows, but you continue, “but I’m not scared anymore — because it hurts more to be nothing than something with you—” 
And his lips find yours. It’s everything you want — because it's him, he’s everything you’d ever wanted, and everything you’d ever want. You want the way his arm slides around your waist to pull you closer, you want the way his hand cups your cheek, you want the way his lips smile against yours, and you’d want his past, present, and future. And you’d do anything to keep it. 
“Promise you’ll never leave like that again?” he murmurs, his arm tightening around your waist as he says the words, his forehead pressed against yours, “I already have abandonment issues,” and you chuckle, your fingers finding his cheek. 
“I promise,” you murmur, “I’m sorry I left — both times I left, and there won’t ever be a third,” 
And he smiles, “You proposing to me, sweetheart? I’m not one to rush into things, gotta take me out on a proper date first,” 
“How about tonight?” you find his lips again, the taste of sugar on his lips — undoubtedly from indulging in a slice or several of wedding cake. 
“So soon?” he hums,and his gaze softens, as he presses a kiss to your forehead, “someone’s eager,” and your fingers intertwine with his, squeezing his, as you would a million times more,
“Well, you don’t know until you try.” 
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✧ a/n: ahhh another celebration fic done!! this one was lowkey a struggle towards the end so i hope this turned out okay. it's beyond me understanding if it did or not lmao. i hope you guys enjoy ahhh -- gotta probably put up a poll to decide the next celebration fic this weekend :) (it's only because i'm horribly indecisive).
✧ taglist: @yunjinabla, @weluvsza, @yamaguccitadashi, @gojobbg, @soulofoz, @hfdkhjghjkghfj, @forest-fruits-jam, @cerene-dipity, @sleazymac-n-cheesy, @reaperxdeath, @octopishisahybridanimal, @hanlay, @whereflowerswenttodie, @tsukimefuku, @numbing3scapism, @arcswonderland, @kirashuu, @fushitoru, @spider-fan72, @jayathelostdragon, @sunflowmaryam, @satorusmochis, @catsgomurp, @simply-a-s1mp, @kentocalls, @weluvsza, @lucy-xv0202, @mazzd4, @dontshuugo, @zz-snow-zz
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eightringsofsaturn · 23 days
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Zoro and Luffy are soulmates. I don't care whether they're romantic or platonic, but it's definitely one of the two. The evidence backing this statement starts at the beginning of this whole thing, where Luffy hears rumours about 'the demon of the east blue' and 'pirate hunter' and decides that Zoro has to be his very first crew member. It's hard to pinpoint just one example that fully captures Zoro and Luffy's relationship, and I think that's what makes it so special, that it's always changing, yet somehow always staying the same in the ways that matter, like, the differences between the relationship between Zoro and Luffy in the East Blue saga, versus their relationship in Thriller Bark. Because realistically, you know their relationship at its core hasn't changed, but there's the sense that it's grown, not only in importance to each party, but also in their willingness to rely on each other as more than just crew mates, but also as friends.
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mccn-bcys · 2 years
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JUST A TOUCH OF YOUR HAND
pairing: marc spector x reader, steven grant x reader, jake lockley x reader
summary: when you turn eighteen, an ink stain appears on your skin wherever your soulmate touches you for the first time. the boys each are dealing with their stain in their own way.
warnings: angsty marc, fluffy jake, soulmate au, DID (I don't have DID so I'm basing my knowledge off of what is in the show, please correct me if anything is wrong), I'm also not a Spanish speaker (I used Google translate please correct me if it's wrong)
authors note: as stated in the warnings, im not a Spanish speaker so pls correct me if it's wrong. I also do not have DID and am using knowledge from the show. There will be a part two to this soon, but I figured I'd go ahead and give you all a taste! I really hope you like it!Let me know what you think! Please like and reblog guys!
word count: 1,817
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when the black stain on their knuckles first showed, all three boys weren't sure what to make of its meaning. at first, they thought it was from holding their soulmate's hand, but that didn't make sense. the stain was just on the knuckles of their right hand. 
it wouldn't be until years later, as they all started getting older, till they started having their own opinions about it. and after the boys were all aware of each other, they would discuss it. well, jake and steven would discuss it.
marc didn't want to talk about it. 
steven wasn't fully convinced that he was destined to have a soulmate. maybe a platonic soulmate, but certainly not a romantic soulmate. surely they would've shown themselves by now, right? so steven decided it best to not romanticize the stain. he just settled on maybe it was a fist bump. or even a lighthearted shoulder punch. some sort of friendly gesture. 
jake was the opposite. this man may have a reputation for being bad and mean and evil, but jake lockley was a huge romantic. he was obsessed with love. of course, the only people who knew were marc and steven.
he loved the idea that there was someone out there that was made for him. he liked to believe that they would love him despite the things he's done, despite his past, despite having two other people that shared his body.
he'd played the scenarios around in his head. there was the classic accidental brushing of his knuckles against you, maybe as you passed in the streets. he imagined that when he'd feel you brush his knuckles, he'd stop and turn, grabbing your hand and stopping you, and then it would be love at first sight. something out of a rom-com, marc would scoff. or maybe for some reason, he would be gently stroking your face with his knuckles. or maybe you dropped something, like papers or books, and you both bent down to pick them up and reached for the same book at the same time, your hands brushing each other. 
jake would spend hours, just staring at his hand and the stain on it. whenever he thinks of his soulmate, he can't keep the giddy grin off his face. sometimes steven likes to indulge in jakes fantasies, just a little. but the fantasies piss marc off to no end. but all jake wanted? he just wanted somebody to love and somebody to love him.
marc didn't want to indulge in any fantasy, romantic or platonic. he'd convinced himself a long time ago that it was just a joke. he'd stare at the stain on his hand, but instead of with a smile like jake, he'd stare in disgust. disgust at the mark, at the world, at himself. 
see, marc had come to the conclusion that the stain was from a punch or some kind of hit. he convinced himself that he'd only hurt you from the beginning, whether on accident or on purpose. but he had no intention of finding out.
he could never hurt you, whoever you were, if he never touched you. he made it a point to not touch anyone. he'd even stopped doing work for khonshu, so he wouldn't risk punching or hitting his soulmate. 
he didn't deserve a soulmate anyways, romantic or platonic. he had done too many horrible things, there was too much blood on his hands. and he knew it was all his fault. he didn't deserve someone to love. he wasn't worthy of love. he was a monster. a killer. he always had been. 
so when he was walking down the streets, head kept low, as he made his way to the grocery store to pick up some milk — because jake had forgotten again — he thought he was going to die.
it was busy on the street. everyone must be getting off work and trying to get home. marc had really tried. tried so hard to squeeze through everyone without touching anyone.
"this is just ridiculous, mate," steven scoffed lightly. marc could see him throw his hands up in exasperation from the reflection of the window across the street. "do you realize how extremely unlikely it is that we'd brush against them on the way to get milk?" 
"not taking any chances," marc grunted, determined. 
"are you scared you're going to accidentally punch someone on the street? plan on fighting anyone who bumps into you?" jake rolled his eyes. he thought this whole "no touching" thing was a bunch of shit. 
jake had always tried to tell marc how ridiculous his thinking was. that even if their soulmate didn't like their night-time jobs or that they didn't want 3 soulmates in one, at least they'd be able to meet them, know that there had been someone for them. 
and marc knew he was right. but that's part of what scared marc. what if they didn't accept him or his alters? what if they only wanted one of them? what if they didn't want to deal with their past? their baggage? marc didn't want to risk it. 
"when you front, you are more than welcome to touch people on the street. but I will do whatever the hell I want while I front," marc scowled at his alter.
"mate...you could have worded that a bit better," steven cringed. 
and marc was going to respond, but before he could even start to think the words, he felt it. 
someone's hand brushed against his knuckles. against the stain. 
and marc was ready to just brush it off. maybe turn around tell them to watch where they were going and keep walking. but none of that happened. 
as soon as the person made contact with him, a shock went through his body and left a tingling sensation on his knuckles. he stopped dead in his track. jake was screaming at him to let him front — a request marc was adamant on denying. steven was suddenly nervous. 
but marc? marc was terrified. if he turned around to look at you, it would only make it more real. marc knew it was you. knew it was his soulmate, otherwise jake and steven wouldn't be freaking out. 
"oy, pendejo! si no los miras ahora mismo, nos tiraré de un edificio!" jake threatened, but it was falling on deaf ears. 
"marc...you don't have to talk to them, but a glance couldn't hurt," steven tried pleading. 
but how it could hurt. because if he looked at you, he'd be ruined. he'd want to talk to you. get to know you. but that came with the risk of you getting to know him. because what if you didn't like it? like him? or his alters? his past? his present? he didn't want to know what he could have with you if it meant he might lose you. 
he had wanted to just keep walking. he tried so damn hard to just keep going. act like it didn't happen. but damn it, lockley had gotten enough control and kept their feet glued to the ground. 
"míralas!" jake insisted causing marc to let out a groan. 
"fine, but just a quick glance," he finally caved, receiving an excited cheer from jake and hopeful sound of agreement from steven. 
taking a deep breath, marc finally turned around and for a second time, was frozen in place. even jake and steven were speechless. 
you were beautiful. the way the sun was hitting your face right now? breathtaking. and you looked just as stunned as he did. 
you had been dreaming of this moment since the stain appeared on your wrist. you — unknowingly like jake — had gone over every scenario possible for the black spot on your wrist. imagined what it'd be like to finally meet your soulmate. imagined what it'd feel like when they touched you for the first time.
never in your wildest dreams had you imagined it happening on your way home on the streets of london. never had you pictured being stopped on the sidewalk, staring at your soulmate just feet away as the world seemed to go on as if nothing was happening. 
he was so handsome. his golden skin shining in the sun as he stared at you in awe. as if his whole world had stopped. the way his curls framed his face. and his eyes. oh they seemed to hold a storm. he seemed to be going through so many emotions at once. 
you both stood there, staring at each other, seconds seeming to pass like hours. you weren't sure what to do and neither was he. neither of you had prepared for this. 
"hi," you finally said. it had been quiet, breathless, especially with the noise of the city, but he heard you loud and clear. 
"hey," he said back, making you relax a little. you were worried he wasn't going to speak to you. 
"are you—" you both started to ask, which made you laugh a little. oh what he'd give to hear that sound again. he didn't even know your name but he'd give you the world if that's what you asked for. 
"sorry," you quickly apologized before continuing, "do you mind?" you asked, gesturing to the stain on his knuckles, to which he lightly shook his head no. 
truth be told, marc was terrified to move. no sudden movements, he didn't want to scare you off. you sounded so gentle, so kind. jake was begging to front. but marc wanted to be selfish for just a bit longer. 
he watched as you took your stained wrist and brushed it against his knuckles again, both of you jumping slightly at the shock feeling coursing through you again. you beamed up at him. 
that's it, he was a goner. 
you introduced yourself, seeming a bit shy. all three boys repeated it in their head, loving how it sounded. marc had even repeated back to you and you were already addicted to how it sounded rolling off his pretty lips.
"i'm marc," he said, quietly, as if his name alone was too much information. 
"marc," you repeated gently. like if you said it too loud, you'd break whatever spell you two were under. he loved how you said his name. 
"well, I've just gotten off work, do you want to get coffee or a drink?" you offered, wanting to immediately get to know the man in front of you. 
and before he could turn down the offer, he found himself saying "yeah, i'd like that." the hell was he thinking? he should just go get the milk and go home. forget you and that this had happened. but that felt impossible now. he doesn't think he'd ever forget you. 
so before you both know it, you're walking side by side, going to get coffee, an easy silence falling over you as you walked together.
.
edit (bc I forgot my taglist):
taglist: @leoluved @howaboutcastiel @sir-knight-slytherdor
(if you'd like to be added to the taglist please let me know!)
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nie7027 · 8 months
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Ive been avoiding sense8 spoilers for years but lately I've been curious and from the little I have allowed myself to see I think Kala ends up with both Wolfgang and Rajan
AND GOD PLEASE LET IT BE REAL
I love Rajan so much(his phrase "Parents do their best for their kids and it's our duty to forgive them for that" has haunt me and my therapist sessions since the first time I heard it) and you have no idea how much I would love him to be in the know about all the whole sensate thing. HE WOULD GO NUTS. HE WOULD BE OVERJOYED.
This man loves Kala so much there's no way he can't love (either romantically or platonically) her soulmates too. Not only they are part of her but they also care for her and watch over her and Rajan would love that. Would love to know there's more people in the world who can see how awesome Kala is. Who share his love for her
AND HE WOULD BE SO JEALOUS
Because he would love to be in the cluster, he would love to have that connection and know what Kala feels and share his own feelings with her.
AND THIS IS SPECIALLY TRUE IF YOU ADD WOLFGANG INTO THE MIX.
Because at least Kala can express herself and has the emotional intelligence to talk about her feelings but Wolfgang is a godammn block of stone AND RAJAN WANTS TO KNOW HOW HE FEELS.
Because he is now dating this strong as fuck German and yes it was sudden but he loves him. He loves him, he loves his the same way he loves Kala, and he knows Wolfgang went through some shit so he wants to be there for him. BUT ITS HARD AS FUCK WHEN SAID MAN RARELY OPENS UP AND TALKS
And it's so unfair Kala has this advantage (and Kala will laugh at how much Rajan whines about it while secretly sharing it Wolfgang).
He wishes he could know what's he's feeling
He and detective Mun befriend because of this. They form the "We are dating a hard to read sensate and we aren't even part of the cluster. (Do you understand our suffering?)" club.
Except Mun isn't suffering. He enjoys slowly learning about Sun. Slowly seeing her open to him.
Rajan does too.
Its just sometimes his impatience (and the culture differences) gets the best of him and he has crises where he feels he isn't being a good partner to Wolfgang.Completely unaware that seeing someone getting so worked up over correctly caring for him hits right into that deep tender part of Wolfgangs heart.
All his life Wolfganf grew up surrounded by people who harmed in a daily basis without a csend thought and now he gets this. Two partes who love and care deeply for him( and the cluster and Feliks of course). He's speechless and doesn't know what to do.
This only worsens Rajans crises.
Kala knows this and just enjoys watching this mess from afar. She's glad the boys of her life care so greatly for each other even if they are a dumpster on fire mess.
She eventually helps them.
Dani and Hernando, while not as in a dire situation as Rajan (Lito is an open book. It's impossible to not know what's he's feeling at all times. The boy might be an professional liar but no. He can't trick Hernando nor Dani) they still have to get used to the whole sensate thing.
They and Rajan form the club "We are in a poly relationship with a sensate/sensates (we are still unsure whether we are only dating just them or if we are actually dating the whole cluster... not that we mind ofc)" club.
It's Amanita and Nomi the ones who are laughing at all of this.
Not everybody can make such perfect and healthy relationship nor tackle the whole sensate thing as easily as them.
Sadly I don't know mucho about Capheus girlfriend but I guess she's on the some boat as detective Mun. The "Wow, this is so cool" club.
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tweeksandturns · 6 months
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After screaming about Scar and Pearl for roughly an hour, i have been convinced to share some of my thoughts. Which may or may not hurt. ALSO: secret life spoilers ahead, be wary. (all of the below entries are copy and pasted, and may not make sense altogether. some go with others, but maybe a little more of them are alone)
While Scar and Scott were half fighting with each other (Scott was trying to shoot him) he was talking about how he chose Pearl and their team over him, and Pearl and Scar were stuck together in the end, the two most wronged by their partners in Double Life (Martyn is up there, but he didn't really have it bad because he has always been a free roamer, unless he has someone to devote too) but Scott, the one who was talking to Scar about this, was also the one who left his soulmate alone. Maybe Scar saw that Scott was to blame. Maybe he saw some sort of hope in Pearls eyes that he wasn't going to tell Scott he was just playing both sides. And maybe Scar figured that she needed someone. And he could understand. They were quite similar, after all :)
Not a copy and paste but thinking about ship names (or duo name) whether platonic, qpr, or romantic, and a dear friend of mine said Moonflower, or Scarlet moon (i am a Moonflower girlie myself)
grian can go to Hermitcraft knowing that we are reaching the end of Hermitcraft (LAST SECRET LIFE SESH RECORDING was 9 days before the end and we have 5 now. how many minecraft days can our weirdo blobs fit) and he thinks, I can finally talk to scar about 3rd life because he's a winner now he remembers if we're doing backwards winners curse, and then be goes to talk to scar in scarland, but stops because. He's with Pearl. And the two of them are laughing and crying, but Grian can see just how close those two winners are so instead he turns and walks away, knowing that he's safe from the watchers with Pearl even if it hurts so badly.
AND AND. specifically. how they won. because it's not like, oh we can talk to each other and get answers from each other, its that it was the exact same method. Scott killed himself both times, and both Scar and Pearl were alone
grian can go to Hermitcraft knowing that we are reaching the end of Hermitcraftthey were both treated wrong by soulmates, (Grians cheating, Scott leaving Pearl), AND OMG that hurts so much more in that paragraph i wrote before cause what if Grian's like, i deserve it for how i treated him, because he knows that he unintentionally uses other players just so he can survive in the games (LAST SECRET LIFE SESH RECORDING was 9 days before the end and we have 5 now. how many minecraft days can our weirdo blobs fit) and he thinks, I can finally talk to scar about 3rd life because he's a winner now he remembers if we're doing backwards winners curse, and then be goes to talk to scar in scarland, but stops because. He's with Pearl. And the two of them are laughing and crying, but Grian can see just how close those two winners are so instead he turns and walks away, knowing that he's safe from the watchers with Pearl even if it hurts so badly.
quoting a friend (not the one who helped with the names) as a reply to my earlier idea of grian angst: "GRIAN THINKING HE DESERVES IT AUGH I LOVE THAT. the two soulmateless people becoming eachothers soulmates !!"
my reply to my friends words (the bit one line above this one), and the thing that really hit my the most: "no no not soulmates. that's two bittersweet for them. no they want something more fluffy, like tilly or jellie. Something like 'partners.' or 'Lovers' but never soulmates. Because really, as much as how they were treated hurt. their soulmates lead them too each other. And well, if you have a soulmate that isn't romantic, it's only fitting if they lead you to the person for you that is, whether they mean it or not.
Help i need sleep but the token semi straights are slapping me with swords-
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beanghostprincess · 3 months
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you get me on how viscerally insane i can be about yamace like wow everything abt them is so sad and bittersweet but also so good bcz yea they fundamentally changed e/o whether its romantic platonic or some secret third thing they were the first to truly understand eachother and the pain of their pasts and like wow... but they also had so much fun together and melded so well that it seemed like the one night they spent with together lasted a whole life time and wow.... anyways good for oda for making two gayasd t4t characters
The T4T couple with Daddy issues of the century tbh. They get each other so well but-- What I love the most about Yamace isn't really the poetry and soulmatism of it all they have going on. But,, It feels so genuine? Just finding somebody you like spending time with AND that you also have things in common with. Their scenes are animated in a very specific way- These two being the only ones in the world. The lightning. The music. The grief and frustration. It's not only something poetic about fire and ice or star crossed lovers, it's just- It feels like meeting somebody and so genuinely enjoying them being with you that the second they aren't there is like a limb is missing. There's so much to unpack here, but Yamace's dynamic makes me go insane in only a few episodes.
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morfanerina · 1 year
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Been seeing this DonSagi ship around and I gotta say, because I automatically think a ship with Sagi is of TMNT 2003, those two certainly had a memorable meet-cute with Don accusing Usagi of harming his brother.
This led me to this TMNT 2003 DonSagi setup
- Leo and Usagi are bff. Even if they act fruity it's just how they are, its completely platonic.
- Usagi visited Leo several times and started to really know each brother - including gentle Donnie, who will fight if he has to and for his family but prefers pacifism.
- Leo will brag about his brothers at the drop of a hat and Usagi always perks up when Donnie comes up.
- Usagi admits his crush on Donnie to Leo stiffly, unsure how the protective leader would react to it. Leo's only hesitance about it was on how Donnie might not feel the same and how it might hurt them if it didn’t work out.
- Usagi didn't ask Splinter's permission for courting beforehand because Leo suggested to wait to see whether his brother would be interested first. Diminish the amount of awkwardness all around. Just in case.
- While those two are scheming on how to get Donnie's attention without the whole ninja family nosing in, said family literally thinks those two (Leo and Usagi) are dating in secret. Mikey already has most of the wedding planned, Raph and Casey have their shovel talks ready and rehearsed and poor Donnie is angsting over having a crush on his brother’s "soulmate".
- Splinter thought LeoSagi was the end goal too but his telenovela instincts are tingling so he decided to wait and see. Besides, he knows Usagi, the rabbit would ask his permission before dating his son.
- April is the one who discovers about Donnie’s crush and is extremely sympathetic. She's also a bit suspicious about this sure relationship the rest of the family has fabricated so she manages to get Leo alone and subtly ask about it.
- I need you to imagine the most baffled look on a mutant turtle's face as Leo registers the question. Obviously he isn't in a relationship with Usagi??? Where did she get that idea??? (the swords exchange, the way you greet each other? she almost says)
- Eventually Leo blurts out Usagi likes Donnie to April.
- April's ecstatic and decides to not spill the beans about the mutual crush, instead joining in the increasingly elaborate scheming.
- And by joining in I mean wrangling the teenagers into a simple and direct plan instead of complex 20 steps or more as Usagi was planning.
- Donnie is very much sad and trying to not be in the same room as Usagi because he doesn't want to get in the way of his brother's relationship and it hurts :( also bc drama
- This makes it exceedingly difficult for any of the plans to succeed so of course it has to be an unplanned confession in a chaotic saving the world situation.
- Donnie's bafflement and asking about the supposed romanting LeoSagi gets him two twin baffled looks.
- Mikey and Raph join in with very confused "but weren't you two together????"
- Leo decides to take those two away so Donnie and Usagi could talk. Also he needs to lecture two turtles about assumptions.
- DonSagi get together... once Usagi gets Splinter's blessing and shovel talk.
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damianbugs · 8 months
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thoughts on superbat ❓
fun ship ❗️ they are 100% soulmates, twin flames, born from the same star, destined to meet etc whether that be romantic, platonic or anything between and outside of that spectrum.
its not my most fav ship, and usually i prefer them as bestfriends who love each other very much and are often mistaken for being romantically involved purely because of how funny that is. they're two very lonely people for a majority of their young lives and had trouble forming those sort of friendships, so i appreciate they found each other later in life and remain important in that regard. aside from what this relationship means for bruce wayne and clark kent, superman and batman are probably my most favourite superhero team!
that being said, some stories (literally the current worlds finest) have that romantic coding to a whole other level. who am i to refuse it then?
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hermywolf · 2 years
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Bestie I absolutely LOVE your The Boys fic recs, could we get some more? I love the longer fics, preferably butcher/hughie but anything esp polyam is great too. I'd owe you my life if you gave me these, thanks!!!
okay so i tried my best!! but there’s unfortunately not that many fics and most of them are really short, i’d love to rec longer ones but there’s not that many. this ended up being mostly smut too bc a good 70% of the ao3 butchie tag is smut, but please if anyone has other recs (even better if they’re long fics!!) let me know & i’ll add them!
here’s part one of my the boys fic recs if anyone needs it
ask a question, get an answer, 2k
smut. basically the bathroom scene in 3x08, but instead of butcher knocking hughie out they end up having sex. i love this one so much. @jaskierx​ strikes again with the characterization, their banter in this fic is>>
canary, 1k
butcher’s internal monologue during 2x03: basically him thinking about hughie’s reaction to him being back
humanity series, 49k
series of smutty fics through s1 and s2 by aishahiwatari, whom we owe like a good half of the butchie content on ao3
i don’t forgive you, but please don’t hold me to it, 1k
smut. s2, when hughie was still mad at butcher. butcher and hughie beat the shit out of each other and then have hate sex. thats it thats the fic. by god these two are so toxic and dysfunctional sometimes its insane
take your time (i won’t be far behind) 2k
i feel like every fandom needs to have at least one soulmate au, and this is it. people get soulmarks when they meet their soulmates, whether they be platonic or romantic. this fic follows each of the boys as they get their own soulmarks
but it may just be a lunatic you’re looking for, 2k
smut. 1x03. hughie is amped up after having just murdered transluscent, butcher lends a helping hand. frenchie is also there but doesn’t participate
present, 7k
awkward getting together in a non-supe au, annie and hughie are besties, annie and butcher hate each other. cute and fun
patch up, 6k
hughie gets hurt during a job. hurt/comfort. im an absolute slut for hurt/comfort my god i love angst. no mcd
ever-needy, 4k
smut. hughie borrows one of butcher’s shirts. butcher’s possessive, hughie’s into it. ik this is supposed to be smut but it still makes my brain leak out of my ears. this author’s note at the end of the fic encapsulates the dynamic perfectly:
“me, on a normal day: butcher would fuck the absolute soul out of hughie until he's bleeding and crying
me, writing this specific piece: Wait But Hughie Is His Prized Porcelain Doll”
a candle in the window on a cold dark winter’s night, 9k
post s3, hughie and butcher’s relationship changed over the past weeks they’ve spent alone, and they’re closer than ever. the boys’ outsider pov on their relationship in chapter 1, hughie pov in chapter 2 and butcher pov in ch3
black coffee, 9k
coffee shop au. i absolutely love how the author translated the boys’ world and conflicts into a coffee shop au. like the rivalry between the boys and vought is just their coffeeshop competing with starbucks and butcher is just as intense about his hatred for starbucks as he is with the supes it’s amazing
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Ted Lasso 3x12 - An Honest Review
I completely understand the amount of dissatisfaction with the finale. I had my own reservations and admittedly didn't like a few little things about it, but it didn't ruin the episode as a whole for me.
Thinking back to when the season three trailer dropped, they warned us about what to expect with the song choice - you can't always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you find you get what you need.
We might not have all got what we wanted, but the characters we've loved for three years got what they needed. Not necessarily forever, but for now.
Nate came back to Richmond and patched things up with Ted. Roy finally started therapy. Keeley chose herself. Sam got to play for the Nigerian team. Jamie worked through his issues with self-confidence. Rebecca got her little moment of gezellig. Ted got to make up for lost time with his son.
The key thing to keep in mind here is that this is what the characters needed in that moment. And at this point in time, we don't know whether this is truly the end for Ted Lasso. There's enough wiggle room for us to potentially pick up where the finale left off sometime in the future. There are things left unsaid, moments left unseen, that have the potential to be explored further down the line. If we don't get that, then at least we got to witness a bittersweet ending for a beloved show.
Now, it wouldn't truly be a trademark Lauren Review™ without me finding at least one parallel between Ted Lasso and the work of David Lynch - so here it is.
The mixed reactions to the pacing of the show and the direction of certain storylines reminded me of the reaction to Twin Peaks season two, when David Lynch left to pursue other projects and Mark Frost handled the show all by himself. In the case of Ted Lasso, Bill Lawrence wasn't present for all of it, which is where some of the perceived problems come in. On top of that, the longer episodes made it more of a struggle for some people to engage with the show (which is true in both cases).
In the second season of Twin Peaks, in what was perhaps the first big 'shipping war' of modern television, Audrey & Cooper didn't get the happy ending the fans wanted (although their relationship would have been problematic if it had become a romantic pairing) - they remained friends. Both Coop & Audrey were given last-minute love interests that arrived in Twin Peaks to sweep them off their feet and completely detach any sort of meaning from their connection. Annie Blackburn was a cardboard cut-out of a woman who fit everything Coop needed at the time. John Justice Wheeler was Audrey's rich, preppy Mills & Boone hero with a private jet to whisk her away on any adventure she desired. One could argue that in the third and final season of Ted Lasso, Michelle was Ted's Annie, and Matthjis was Rebecca's John Justice Wheeler. The difference is, Audrey didn't get on the plane. She knew that whatever was waiting for her with JJW was too good to be true. That leaves us to wonder, what if Ted hadn't stayed on the plane? What if Rebecca's relationship with the flying Dutchman didn't develop? Where would it leave them?
The cast have waxed poetic about the beauty of platonic love and the concept of soulmates and cosmic connections, but for a show that lived by the rules of rom-com royalty Nora Ephron, there was no romantic payoff for any of its main pairings. That's not to say platonic soulmates can't be as meaningful and important as romantic soulmates - they absolutely can - but for all the expectations they subverted, choosing to duck out of putting the show's leads together by opening the episode with a fake-out, after all the groundwork they built for them, felt like kind of a cheap shot. I will admit, though, it was kind of funny. And let's be honest, they gave the TedBecca gang a few crumbs to work with in future fanfics. We have to at least be thankful for that.
As a qualified screenwriter, do I feel this episode - and the season as a whole - hit all the right marks? No. But it wasn't a complete disaster either. Sometimes jokes didn't land. Sometimes a scene really was too long. But it was long enough for them to tell the story they wanted to tell.
I think one of the main reasons there was trouble in terms of giving the story enough space to be told was that we're living in the generation of binge-watching and streaming. The Ted Lasso writers are old school. They've been playing the long game within a short format, and only managed to break out of that restrictive mold in the third and final season.
Do I wish Apple had pulled a Showtime and extended Ted Lasso season three for eighteen episodes instead of twelve? Yes. I think it would have given them just enough space to tie up a few loose ends. But at the moment, we don't know if this is truly the end - there's a chance we might get to see how things turn out. I know, it's the hope that kills you, but I'm still going to hold on to that hope. Because that's what rom-communism teaches you - there's always hope in despair.
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cyberpunkonline · 7 months
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Neon Kisses: Decoding the Romance in Cyberpunk Fiction
In a future awash with neon lights, cybernetic implants, and artificial intelligence, it's easy to forget about the softer, subtler aspects of human existence. Yes, we're talking about love, darling. No, not the platonic or filial kind, but the passionate, sweep-you-off-your-feet romance that even a heart made of circuits would find compelling. Here, we focus on how romance isn't just an incidental subplot in cyberpunk fiction—it's a focal point that illuminates the essence of what it means to be human, even when humanity itself is in question.
Love in the Midst of Cyber Chaos
Take Neal Stephenson's classic "Snow Crash," for instance. Hiro Protagonist may have the mind of a samurai and the hacking skills of a god, but he's not immune to the allure of intimacy. His emotional connection with Y.T. may not be a grand love affair, but it's a grounding element that adds dimensions to his character. Even in the abstract, chaotic world of the Metaverse, romance serves as an anchor.
Passion in 'New Rose Hotel'
William Gibson's "New Rose Hotel" dives headfirst into the passion, lust, and betrayal that define many a romantic engagement. The tale is a gripping love triangle set in a world of corporate espionage. As the two male protagonists vie for the attention of Sandii, a woman with mysterious intentions, the atmosphere is charged with sexual tension and emotional complexity. The affair culminates in a heartbreaking finale that's as devastating as any tragic love story, showing how romance can be the ultimate double-edged sword.
Love Beyond Wires: Man and Machine
The allure of the artificial woman has been a subject of fascination in films like "Ex Machina." Here, the film doesn't shy away from exploring the complexities of a romantic relationship between a human and an artificial being. The unfolding romance is not just taboo; it's a direct challenge to the very notion of love as we know it.
Unconventional Love Stories
Even LGBTQ+ romances find a place amidst the cybernetic revolution. Anime like "Serial Experiments Lain" explore love and sexuality in ways that are as non-binary as the data streams coursing through the network. The ambiguous nature of Lain's relationships, often tinged with romantic undertones, mirrors the complexities of sexual identity in a high-tech world.
Dystopian Soulmates
If you've ever played "Cyberpunk 2077," you know that love can be found even in the gritty streets of Night City. Characters can engage in romance regardless of gender, each relationship offering its own unique storyline. And it's not just superficial; these romantic arcs bring nuance and depth, adding emotional gravity to the game's overarching narrative.
Why Love Matters in a Cyber World
Romance in cyberpunk isn't just filler; it's an essential part of the genre's DNA. Whether it's the explosive chemistry between
partners in "New Rose Hotel," or the forbidden love between man and machine in "Ex Machina," these romantic elements serve to humanize the high-tech landscapes. They serve as a reminder that even in a world dominated by technology, where our very essence could be boiled down to lines of code or genetic sequences, the need for love and intimacy is a fundamental part of the human experience.
In these dystopian settings, romance acts like a spark in the dark, a symbol of resistance against the dehumanizing aspects of technology. Love stories in cyberpunk worlds serve to question societal norms, challenge our understanding of affection, and underscore that our ability to feel love is what sets us apart from the machines we create.
So, while you're navigating through hacker wars, corporate greed, and artificial minds, don't forget to look for the neon heart beating at the core of cyberpunk narratives. Because if love can survive in these stark, mechanized futures, then surely it can endure just about anywhere. And that, darlings, is a comforting thought for any age—cybernetic or otherwise.
- Raz
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Trope rating game
tagged by @zerokrox-blog. Thanks so much!!!
rules: How much do these tropes affect your decision to click on a fic? -10 -> very dissuaded  0 - don’t care either way  +10 -> very enticed  nope -> if it’s a hard no and you’d never click on a fic with that tag or or you even have the tag blocked or you’d insta click out of the fic if it wasn’t tagged.  Bonus points for explaining the rating and whether it’s conditional.
Age gap: 0
It becomes an immediate -100 when one character is underage and the other isn't.
Codependency: 0
It becomes +10 if it's Platonic Stobin but otherwise I'm pretty neutral.
Obsession/Possessiveness, jealousy: -3
Honestly the other tags would have to sale this for me. I don't mind a bit of jealousy, but a lot of these I've seen lean into Dark!fic, which isn't for me. I like angst, yes, but it's gotta be leading towards Angst with a Happy End.
Opposites (grumpy/sunshine etc): 0
Here's the thing, in a lot of these opposites fic, they aren't actually opposites. It's like... their outward appearance is opposites, or they approach things in different ways, but at the core, they aren't opposites. Having just opposites tagged wouldn't get me to click on your fic.
Enemies to lovers, Enemies with benefits: +3/-8
Duel ratings here. Enemies to lovers, yes. Enemies with benefits, absolutely not. This is just me as an ace person who can't contextualize sleeping with someone you don't even like??? Couldn't be me, I'll never understand it.
Friends with benefits: +3
I like it only if it ends with them together. I'm a hopeless romantic that way.
Sex to feelings: -5
Same at the enemies with benefits. I gotta know at least one of the characters is already halfway in love for this to work for me.
Fake dating/relationship: +10
Oh the angst!!! I love it. Especially paired with the Mutually Pining tags, so good!! So, so good!
Friends to lovers: +1000
This is top tier to me.
Found Family: +10
YES! Let the families be found!
Hurt/Comfort: +10
Yes. I want them to hurt and then be so so comforted. Every time. All the time. ^ Zero wrote that and I agree.
Love Triangle: -5
Ugh. No.
Poly, open relationships: 0
I'll read Poly, but not open.
Mistaken/hidden identity: +3
This hits my misunderstandings/miscommunication desires well, so I do like it.
Monsterfucking: 0
It will not deter me from a fic, but I don't really read PWP because it doesn't hit for me. I need the plot. I gotta know that the character loves the monster their fucking or I just click out. Listen, judge all you want, but I will click into a PWP fic and scroll to the very bottom and read the ending first. I gotta learn if it ends with love or not! I'm not wasting my time to be disappointed :/
Pregnancy: -9
Not a -10 simply because the tags CAN persuade me to read but rarely.
Second Chance: +8
Second chances lends itself so well to the Angst with a Happy End, miscommunication, and misunderstanding tropes I adore. I won't read if the second chance is for abusive relationships but otherwise yes, I love it.
Slowburn: +2
Here's the thing. I like this in theory. I want to like it. But it's got to be well done. There's only so much suspension of disbelief I can do before I'm eye-rolling at how these two won't just talk??? This is especially double for fics that give us the POV of both characters. If I can see they're both in love and stupidly obvious to everyone around them, I can't. I will skip whole chapters to find where the slow burn ends. I'm not sorry.
Soulmates: +10
Soulmates!!!! I love this trope. However, I think it is at its best when the soulmates are platonic, OR the thing that makes you soulmates (like words appearing on skin, or images, or seeing color, etc) happens only after you've fallen in mutual love. I'll read fics where this doesn't happen, of course I will, but there's something special to me about the "we found each other, and without knowing if we'll be soulmates, I've decided to love you anyway. I love you, soulmate or not" and it's through that decision to love that the universe grants you each other.
I'm going to tag: @i-less-than-three-you @nburkhardt @afewproblems @rebelspykatie @steddierthings @a-little-unsteddie @skepsiss @localinsaneman
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quartzguts · 8 months
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Trope rating game
i'm putting this as its own post instead of reblogging to avoid having a super duper long post on my blog. thank u @rinn-e for tagging me!
rules: How much do these tropes affect your decision to click on a fic? -10 -> very dissuaded 
0 - don’t care either way 
+10 -> very enticed 
nope -> if it’s a hard no and you’d never click on a fic with that tag or or you even have the tag blocked or you’d insta click out of the fic if it wasn’t tagged.  Bonus points for explaining the rating and whether it’s conditional.
Age gap: +10
YEAH YEAH YEAH. pretty much all my recent major ships have had age gap (ardynoct, askefinn, sladin, etc). i've figured out recently that i find it kind of boring when the two characters are on the same level, and age gap is an easy way to effect that power imbalance.
Codependency: +10
yep yes and always. love when two people are each other's world. love when they would do anything for each other and that's a bad thing. love when they destroy themselves for each other.
Obsession/Possessiveness, jealousy: +7
see above lol. this one gets a lower score because jealousy can get a little annoying. i actually like it when characters AREN'T jealous... like, A trying to make B jealous and B doesn't care, because they know A will come crawling back to them sooner or later.... nice... if the jealousy is warranted (like an above situation w flirting/cheating/etc) then that crosses the line into love triangle which i'm not big on, and if it isn't warranted it gets annoying. i like obsession and possessiveness a lot but jealousy doesn't necessarily have to be part of that.
Opposites (grumpy/sunshine etc): 0
eh, it's okay. i prefer it when two characters in a ship are shockingly similar, even if they have completely different values/motives/goals, whatever. opposites can be cute but it's not really my thing.
Enemies to lovers, Enemies with benefits: +9
i started writing a paragraph about how i prefer enemies to remain fucked up and awful even if they get into a relationship, but then i remembered all the crying i've done imagining soft sweet Wales endgame askefinn and i was like yeah, let's not lie today LOL. both are good.
Friends with benefits: -5
where's the ROMANCE? where's the DRAMA? where's the OBSESSION? it's not like i hate it but i typically want a more substantial emotional attraction y'know. also, a lot of the fic i've read recently does... not really involve the characters in question being friendly lmaooo.
Sex to feelings: 0
this is a difficult one to rate because it can be very very different depending on the existing dynamic. are we talking about two strangers who keep hooking up and develop feelings? two enemies who feel nothing but hate for each other, but their relationship starts to change once they have sex? i guess this trope is more the former, which isn't something i would actively look for but isn't something i dislike either, so it gets an even 0.
Fake dating/relationship: +6
god i used to read this trope so so often. i'm not huge on established relationship because i want to see the relationship grow (rereading this i realize it makes me look like a tool because i've written a bunch of established relationship recently but like... I KNOW how they got there ok. my city now), but i also love cutesy romantic shit, so fake dating is right up my alley (along with arranged marriage and soulmates for the same reason). bonus if the faking is very uncomfortable for one or both characters. put those blorbos in a psychologically stressful situation where they have to pretend to be happy 👌
Friends to lovers: +3
yeah it's fine. see above, i like my ships terrible and fucky. this trope doesn't usually facilitate that. if it's awful friends to awful lovers i'm all over it.
Found Family: -9
not gonna lie, i wasn't big on found family in the first place and kingdom hearts fandom utterly destroyed whatever little interest i had in it. while i like platonic relationships in original fiction, for fic i rarely if ever read gen fic. it's shipping or bust for me. if they aren't doing the nasty (physically or emotionally) i'm not interested.
Hurt/Comfort: +8
ohhhhh yeaaaahhhhh babyyyyyyyy i'm all about that whump. love it when a blorbo is harmed and another blorbo has to help them. i can go for hurt/no comfort too sometimes but only if i'm in the mood for it.
Love Triangle: -6
yeaaaah no. this is another area where i like them in original fiction but am not at all into it in fic. i like my ships with two characters (who preferably have no interest in anyone else).
Poly, open relationships: -5
i do have some multi character ships (pyra/mythra/rex/nia is the one that immediately comes to mind, though i don't typically read xenoblade fic) but i'm not usually a fan, for the same reason i mentioned for love triangles. a lot of times i'm only here for one or two characters in the relationship so anyone extra feels unnecessary and distracting.
Mistaken/hidden identity: +5
i probably would've given this a lower score if i wasn't in my sladin revival era. superhero secret identities are perfect for conflict.
Monsterfucking: +8
gave this an 8 because when it leans too far into furry/bestiality territory that's when i'm out. generally love monsters of all kinds though, and all the hentai-esque tropes that come with it.
Pregnancy: -8
hate kid fics. god do i hate kid fics. this only gets a -8 and not -10 because unwanted pregnancy fics that do not end with a kid being born can be pretty angsty, which is nice.
Second Chance: +6
second chance for... what? as in a redemption arc? sure i'm down for that. also down for a character getting a second chance even though they have not earned it, because another character refuses to give up on them/let go. second chance time travel where a character gets to go back and redo something is also top tier.
Slowburn: +1
this one was very hard to rate. i've read some slowburns that i absolutely loved. i'm currently writing a slowburn where it's 20k in and the mfers haven't even held hands. but i also get bored easily and if it's TOO slow it begins to feel like the fic is dragging its feet. to keep me interested i usually like if there's another element going on, like fake dating, enemies to lovers, heavy whump, etc.
Soulmates: +9
YES. YES YES YES. LOVE THAT. again, it's a way to have both relationship development AND immediate sex/romance. especially good when the soulmates are enemies or otherwise not suited to each other in any way whatsoever and this is surely the work of a god with a very shitty sense of humor. i have written and read many soulmates fics and i intend on writing and reading many more.
Tagging all of my lovely mutuals!! qwq some of u have already been tagged so i will save u the trouble of tagging u twice!
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hardtreekoala · 11 months
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Understanding Soulmates: A Connection Beyond Words
Introduction
The concept of a soulmate has been captivating humanity for centuries, inspiring poets, writers, and dreamers alike. The idea that there is one special person out there who completes us, understands us on a profound level, and brings out the best in us is both comforting and intriguing. In this article, we will explore the concept of a soulmate, its different interpretations, and its significance in our lives.
Defining a Soulmate
A soulmate is commonly described as a person with whom one shares an extraordinary and deep connection that transcends time, space, and circumstances. This connection is believed to go beyond the realms of logic and physical attraction, involving an inexplicable bond between two individuals. Some describe it as a feeling of familiarity and recognition upon meeting, as if they have known each other for a lifetime, even if they've just met.
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Types of Soulmates
Romantic Soulmate: This is the most commonly perceived type of soulmate. It refers to the partner with whom we feel an intense romantic connection. Romantic soulmates are believed to bring passion, understanding, and a sense of completeness to each other's lives.
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Platonic Soulmate: This type of soulmate is not necessarily a romantic partner but someone with whom we share a deep and profound connection. It could be a best friend, a mentor, or even a family member. Platonic soulmates often understand us on a profound level, offering unwavering support and companionship.
Karmic Soulmate: Karmic soulmates are thought to come into our lives for a specific purpose – to teach us important life lessons or to help us grow emotionally and spiritually. These connections may be intense and sometimes challenging, but they serve as catalysts for personal development.
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The Significance of Soulmate Connections
Self-Discovery: Soulmates often mirror parts of ourselves that we may not be fully aware of. They can help us discover hidden strengths, weaknesses, and aspects of our personality that require attention or development.
Growth and Transformation: Soulmate connections can be catalysts for growth and personal transformation. These relationships often challenge us to overcome obstacles, break patterns, and become better versions of ourselves.
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Unconditional Support: Soulmates provide unwavering support and understanding, creating a safe space for vulnerability and emotional expression.
Spiritual Connection: Many view soulmate connections as a sign of spiritual alignment and destiny. The belief in soulmates often extends beyond a single lifetime, suggesting a cosmic connection that transcends time.
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Finding Your Soulmate
The idea of finding a soulmate can be both exciting and daunting. While some people believe soulmates are predestined, others see it as a matter of chance or serendipity. Regardless of beliefs, there are several key aspects to keep in mind:
Self-Awareness: Understanding oneself is crucial in recognizing a soulmate connection. Being aware of personal values, goals, and desires can help attract a compatible partner.
Patience: Finding a soulmate can take time. Rushing into relationships without genuine connection may lead to disappointment.
Openness: Remaining open-minded and receptive to new experiences and people can increase the likelihood of encountering a soulmate.
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Conclusion
The concept of a soulmate goes beyond mere romantic notions, encompassing deep connections, personal growth, and spiritual understanding. Whether through romantic, platonic, or karmic connections, soulmates play significant roles in our lives, guiding us towards self-discovery and transformation. As we navigate the journey of life, it is essential to stay open to the possibility of encountering these extraordinary connections that transcend the ordinary and enrich our existence.
The sketch you need to MANIFEST love Ready to meet your true Soulmate?
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