whatdidugetforvday

[whatdidugetforvday]

(spongebob narrator voice) two years lat’eur

hi there. I’m doing a lot better now, go figure. I’m in college again and doing really well there, I know I’m loved by a lot of people and I’m genuinely so happy to be single that I’ve gone on dates but didn’t feel like dating right now. I cry like once every few months (mostly when rewatching LOTR), and I’m in a good mood most of the time. I eat pretty normally.

I still have dreams about you though but they’ve changed. They’re nightmares now, and usually the scary part of the nightmare is just meeting you and not being able to strangle you to death. Weird how things change, huh?

I just dug this up again because I’ve been reading Why Does He Do That, a book on abusers. It’s really, really freaking helpful and it’s online as a pdf so I can only recommend it. 

What I apparently didn’t mention here is that my therapist told me after you broke up with me for the second time that if we had stayed together you would have started to physically abuse me. I know now that I was in an abusive relationship. And I know now that I wasn’t to blame for how you treated me, and neither was your self- diagnosed mental illness. You were. I’m pretty sure your “abusive” ex girlfriend was actually a victim too, from what I gathered. I haven’t seen you since the last post I made here and I’m fucking glad because every time I drive into your city I get nauseous because I fear you might be there. At the same time I want to kick your teeth in so if you read this don’t feel too good about yourself. One of the last times we hung out, you threatened to beat me up in public. And I still would have stayed with you. So thank all the dogs in the world that you broke up with me and moved on. 

A month ish after the breakup you sent me a text to clear your conscience, vaguely saying that you felt bad about how you treated me. When I exploded back at you via text and calls you blocked me and it’s stayed that way ever since, thank dog. The only time I think about you now is when I have a dream about trying to assault you and then I just feel that I really want to warn others to get out of your way before you get to them. 

If anyone reads this and feels like they feel the same way I felt in my earlier posts, please google some signs of abuse or start reading Why Does He Do That because when I wrote those posts, I was still trapped in about a year’s worth of gaslighting and emotional abuse. When I read this now, it doesn’t sound like me at all. It’s not shameful to be in this situation. I am smart, independent, ambitious and I fucking kick ass and I was in the same situation. 

I thought I deserved it, I thought it was normal, I thought I was being dramatic or that I was happy with him and everything else was the problem. It wasn’t, it was him. As soon as I got over him I felt so, so, so much better. I know it’s almost impossible to get out because you probably don’t want to realize you’re being abused, but if you do from reading this, stay safe and you can do this.

And if you, P., are reading this- I haven’t seen you in two years and I’m happy that way. And don’t think you have control over me any more or can scare me. The only thing I’m feeling is trauma from when you did. I’m living a happy life, moving forward and being genuinely loved and supported. I already won. 

#abuse

[whatdidugetforvday]

a Realization

Recently, I realized

No matter how gently I touch my dog

Even the softest pets 

Cause his whole body to move just a bit.

I think that is an Important Realization.

#winnie the pooh #dog #dogs #doggo #doggerino #doggerson

[whatdidugetforvday]

today on: my dog is annoyed with me

So I invented a game for my dog and it’s called “quality control”. Guess who’s the quality control in this house? He is! 

So there’s a hallway between the kitchen and the pantry, and in that hallway is my dog’s very favorite bed. So at some points during the day, and after his dinner when he settles in to snooze, he’ll be in the hallway, sleeping and waking up every time you walk by him. So when I make my own dinner and grab ingredients from the pantry, I constantly alert him and walk by him with new things.

It started when I got up at night to go grab a bottle of water from the pantry and he woke up from a deep sleep, looking very tired but alert. I always pet him back to sleep and talk to him for a bit, but the water bottle always put him a little off. He’s a small dog, and he’s sleeping on the floor, while the water bottle is as tall as him and is held five feet higher than him so of course it’d make him a little nervous. So I just explained to him what I was doing, showed him the water bottle, and he eagerly sniffed it for a bit before settling in to sleep once again.

So since then, whenever I have something that can be safely sniffed by him, I lean down, tell him what it is, and let him have a little sniff.

He’s a very calm little fella, too. He just sniffs things, gives me an “ah, that’s what that is. I’m done now hooman” look and goes back to chilling. He hasn’t once tried to eat something or looked like he wanted to eat it, even passed bananas through quality control recently and he really likes them. Very professional.

I feel like there are so many things that he’ll never be able to taste because they’re not safe for him or just because I never think of giving him some of the stuff I eat, too. And sniffing is a really fun activity for him. He loves sniffing in the wild, so I hope he likes sniffing all kinds of different things and wonder what information he gets.

He’s a very precious friend and passing a bag of lentils or a couple of bananas through my little helpful quality control station makes me happy each time.

#dogs #puppo #doggo #puppy #dog games

[whatdidugetforvday]

update kinda

so yeah i got dumped again

I’m just gonna use this for memes and stuff from now on.

I don’t wish anything bad on you, but that was real shitty, dude.

[whatdidugetforvday]

Pup Rescue

Hi P.

So today I rescued our dog in need!

He tried to run after some deer with his leash trailing after him and oh boy did it turn out badly for the little dog. He got stuck in some bushes and my dad couldn’t find him for half an hour. So, my dad called me, I drove out and searched with  him. Since the pupper was crying out when I yelled his name, I found him even though he was standing so deep in the bushes that only his head was poking out. He was so excited and happy about being rescued from there!

Poor puppy. Now he’s enjoying a peaceful nap and some cuddles from time to time. 

I also just decided that I wasn’t happy with talking to my guy “friend” who kind of wanted to guilt me into sleeping with him a while ago, and just shot him a quick message that he just overstepped every boundary ever with that and that I don’t want to see or speak with him again. I usually don’t do anything like that so I’m a bit proud of myself.

As soon as I came home my parents got on my nerves. And I’m frustrated about not having the opportunity to get a job and never having money. I just kind of want to get out of here, and fast. I’d just like my sweet little Mazda, a tiny apartment and something I like doing for the rest of my life. 

[whatdidugetforvday]

That Happened

Hi P,

Everything is seriously strange.

I just hung out with you again for two days and it felt like we hadn’t seen each other in a while, not like we were actually split up. You’re actually even a bit lovey dovey but it’s never too much, and I don’t feel like I’m in love with you more than you like me. You do make stupid jokes sometimes but I can call you out on it so it’s alright.

It’s really refreshing to hang out with you because honestly, I love my best friend and I love my brother and I like many people but there’s no one I can talk to like I can talk to you. And I mean, being cuddled is about the best feeling ever. 

Since this is kind of like our honeymoon phase, I’m still a little bit guarded. I think I don’t show it but I’m definitely trying to guard my feelings a little more than I would usually. It did feel good to kiss you again, kind of like coming home after a long journey.

My parents aren’t too excited, as is my best friend and brother, but in the end it’s my decision and I know you make me happy. You bring out the side of me that I can’t usually show. We have our differences, but it’s good that way. There’s nothing I hate more than people who agree with you on everything.

And I feel like I’m doing way better than I used to, I’m comfortable with my body around you and I’m eating around you, and when I get my jealous or sad moments, I can snap out of it and remind myself that I’m overreacting. 

Now I’m looking forward to seeing you again, but you work now so it’s not as easy as it used to be and I’m trying to get into work or a program for next year as well. 

I’m looking forward to seeing my best friend this week too and I’ll have to talk to my brother on whether I’ll go see him too this month. We were kind of planning on it, but I’m not sure. I’d like to see him again, it’s always great hanging out with him. 

[whatdidugetforvday]

[whatdidugetforvday]

[whatdidugetforvday]

Literally Like OMG Hi

So yeah, you know about this now. I sent you the link to here and it’s pretty embarassing, but at least you know that I’m extremely sincere about how I feel towards you.

What happened in the meantime was basically that we had a discussion/ fight about some too private things for this platform. And how the result we got right now came out of that, I don’t know, but it did- we’re going to hang out again and you agreed to be monogamous if we still like each other.

So now I’m looking forward to seeing you and I’d love to just see you right the fuck now! I mean, hello? It’s great talking to you again, I’d love some cuddles and just to see you again. But it’s probably going to be at least a week.

Also it’s a bit weird still. We don’t know how this is going to turn out. But I want to try. I really, really like you. And you said you’d try too.

My therapist was really proud of my progress and she said I should keep on doing what I’m doing right now, and it’s alright that I’ll be seeing you again.

I also got an invitation to an interview for the program I’d like to join next year so that’s great. I’ll keep applying to other stuff though, just so I have some back up. Now I feel more secure about my future. I can use this year to figure out what I want to do and keep working on myself.

I’m looking forward to seeing your town, hanging out with you in the bath tub and being silly with you again so much. I tried to guard my feelings but holy shit, I can already feel myself falling in love again.

#diary #dear diary #yeah this is embarassing

[whatdidugetforvday]

Nelly

The day after you died, my brother taped your photograph in his diary and captioned it “You were the good in this world”.

You were always a whirlwind, and you left us as suddenly as a summer shower. You never showed signs of your illness. You bore the pain for a long time until it became too much. But even on your last day, you were still full of joy and excitement. 

Some faces are so easily read. You could portray the slightest change of emotion with the raise of an eyebrow, but usually you brightened the room with your smile. Even though you weren’t very vocal, in your company I felt at home, and I knew I was understood. With one nod, or one touch, you could soothe the storms inside me.

We didn’t know each other for as long as I would have liked, but our time was filled with adventures and love. I taught you most things you knew and you taught me the things that truly matter. When you were with me, I knew I always had someone to turn to. 

Now that you’re gone, I miss you. Some people think you were just a dog, but you were my best friend. You had so much beauty, and love, and joy. You would have gone anywhere with me, and I would have done anything to keep you from harm. But in the end, it was time for you to go.

You are my reminder that there is good in the world. May you find soccer balls and spots in the shade wherever you are now. 

[whatdidugetforvday]

Waste Me, My Friend

Hi P.

It’s weird to write this here since I’m basically in contact with you again, but I can’t talk to you about anything and everything anymore and it feels great to write my thoughts and feelings down.

I haven’t texted back since our first convo ended but today I came up with a response and I just sent it.

Today was the worst day in a long time.

I just felt so tired, worthless, sick- basically just like a handful of mud.

I didn’t get out of bed until about 5 pm, then I took a bath and ate too much noodles with peas. At least I got up eventually, but it was a pretty sad day. I even cried a little bit.

Now, I motivated myself to put my feelings into words and text them to you. As a basic summary, I told you that if we started back up, I’d like to take it slow- hang out again, then if we still get along, some day I’d like to be in a relationship that’s better and different from our first attempt. 

I don’t have a clue how you’re going to respond and I’m so nervous that my hands are shaking, my heart is beating faster and I don’t think I’ll be able to sleep for a good while.

The thought of maybe kissing you again makes my head spin and my stomach do cartwheels. I’m trying not to dwell on it, but then again, it’s hard not to.

Today was terrible, but tomorrow is a new day. Tomorrow can always be better.

I need to finish my eevee project and do more applications for what I’m going to do for next year, and also find a job for now which is kind of hard without a car. Or I could just win the lottery, but I never even buy lottery tickets so these chances are slim.

I slept for so long today but I’m tired again now. I don’t think I’ll be able to sleep well though.

My grandpa has dementia and that’s been eating away at me too in my thoughts and heart. He doesn’t know me and he hasn’t for a few years. Sometimes he forgets who his children are, and he doesn’t even know that my dad has children. He used to be a witty, strong role model and now he’s always confused and physically weak. He’s still a sweetheart though. And soon he’s going to be in care for the day so my grandma doesn’t have to take care of him all the time and can go to the doctor’s office without having to arrange for someone who can watch her husband. I can’t imagine how my grandma feels. They were such a sweet and beautiful couple and now she has to care for him like a mother. 

Sometimes I wish I was more confident and had better social skills so I could help out more in situations like these but it’s hard for me to spend time with him when he doesn’t know me. 

I massaged the dog’s back for a few minutes until he fell asleep. I’m not terribly good at it, but you always loved massages from me and would randomly give me back rubs just because. I loved playing with your hair when you were driving or just sitting next to me. Sometimes, I’d make you sit in front of me on the bed so I could try to braid your short hair, and you’d be excited about the tiny braids even though they never lasted for more than a few minutes.

The dog likes my massages too, but he’s not picky about his cuddles. He thanked my by licking my hand for a while, then falling back asleep.

I gave you a hair tie of mine once and you were so grateful. We weren’t huge gift givers, but we were each so thankful of the random things we gave each other. One day, you just brought me an old ukulele of yours because I mentioned wanting to play the ukulele. When we quickly stopped by at your parents’ house, you ran back inside, rummaged through some stuff and came back with the one ring from Lord of the Rings that you gave me. You ordered a kids’ meal in the drive through just to get a cute little plush dog for me. 

So now I’m just trying not to think about your reply. Instead, I want to be tired enough to go to sleep so I can wake up and have a normal day tomorrow. 

#relationships #I'm kind of a mess #but whatever #breakups #diary #dear diary #wordvomit #wallace and gromit #yeah I'm on it #strong wit #prom's lit #enough rhymes #bad day

[whatdidugetforvday]

Yay! We did it!

Holy fuck.

Yesterday I was just chilling with my best friend and we’d just started a movie when I see a new message, open it and HOLY SHIT! FUCKING HOLY SHITBALLS! It’s you!!! My heart felt like it just stood still for a second, then it started racing and I started shaking.

Ultimately, we had to pause the movie and watch funny videos instead, I had to hug my dog, hug my best friend, and talk to my American friend to calm down. When my friend hugged me, she was shocked because my heart was beating so fast. 

Your texts were super typical for you. You’re guarded, you don’t let much information out and you avoid the actual topic. But I stayed on topic, I was friendly but asked for answers on the things that haunted me. I’m a little proud of that.

So that’s where we’re at now. You sound like you don’t want a relationship or scared of it, and I said I want one eventually. 

I thought this conversation would destroy me but I’m feeling okay. I couldn’t really sleep and I’m stuck in thoughts and a bit confused right now but I’m not desperate, I feel fine on my own, and I feel like I’m handling it okay.

I’m still thinking about my answer though.

What I want to say is “Do you just care about still being able to fuck other people or are we on the same page?” 

What I want is to hang out with my male best friend, who’s you (what a surprise), exclusively have sex with you, and be cheesy from time to time. I want to tell you that, but I don’t know if I should. Right now, I like working on myself and being by myself, too.

I think I’m a bit afraid of that rejection, that fucking other people besides me is more important to you than having me. But if it turns out that way, then it’s your decision, I have to respect that decision- but I can still think it’s dumb as fuck. 

I’m still working on the eevee plush for my mom, by the way. I wish I could show you. Right now, I wish I could meet up with you and talk about everything that’s on my mind since the beginning of the year, everything that happened and everything else under the sun.

I wish I had my little dream car so I could drive out and talk to you in the car for hours and hours after sharing some chicken nuggets.

My mom and I booked things for our trip to Ireland yesterday and I’m super excited. I wish I could share that with you. I wish I could go on vacation with you some day. Explore Mongolia on horseback or just take a road trip to France or something like that.

Right now, I haven’t replied to your last “yeah huh” text, and I’m thinking of what to say. I mean I want to convey that I’m in no hurry at all, and I’m different now. I’m more confident, I’m secure in myself and more easy going. I can do a relationship, and I want to be in one where we’re just chill and like we want, but we don’t fuck other people. I don’t know. Maybe I’ll wait until tomorrow and think about what to say some more before I regret what I tell you.

I’m just glad you don’t hate me, and that we feel the same. And that I feel so at ease now even though there’s a huge chance that I’m never going to be together with you again.

I’m going back to sewing eevee and eating some guacamole. I’d love to be able to make some Mexican food with you and watch Rogue One, finally. It just doesn’t feel right without you yet.

#relationships #breakups #dear diary #diary #letters to my ex

[whatdidugetforvday]

Pause Play Pause

Hello, P.

I haven’t written down anything for the last few days.

I’m feeling sad again. Since I’ve sent my letter to you, it’s worse than normally. Usually, I’m pretty fine but I can feel myself experiencing sad moments. Just now I remembered exactly how you told me that you didn’t want us anymore. The hurt still feels the same.

The longer we’ve been out of contact, the more sad I get when I think about us not ever being together again. The less I trust in you loving me still like I thought I knew you did. The more I’m coming to grips with the fact that somehow, I’ll have to live on my own now because I only want you, I wanted to do everything with you by my side, and now I can’t see you anymore.

I miss the little songs you made up for me and the things you’d always do to make me laugh and the way you felt when I hugged you for the first time each time we met up. 

I miss you understanding me like no one else. I miss your beautiful smile. I miss you smoking cigarettes in the car with the window down, and I miss you eating like a feral animal after a long day. I miss your compliments and your critiques.

I miss hearing your voice so, so much. I miss your wild side, your soft self, and everything inbetween. I’m still in love with you, and it feels like I’ll always stay in love with you. 

You know I’m not the cheesy kind. I don’t believe in any one true love. But I feel that you were the only one for me.

I miss you, and I love you, and it hurts that I couldn’t ever say that to your face. 

#breakups #relationships #dear diary #diary #missing you #letters to my ex #sappy #well this is embarassing

[whatdidugetforvday]

Dirt n Desperation

P.

Today’s the first day I felt angry towards you for a few minutes. I cried a little too, trudging through the mud with the dog by my side.

Maybe I’m angry at myself too since I care about you so much, sometimes I feel like you’ve lead me on and I’m still trapped like a mouse in a trap. Except I was your mouse, and that was enough for me.

I’m always torn between feeling like it’s okay, I’m doing the right thing and I’m alright as a person, and feeling like a hopeless failure.

And I’m tired of people telling me what kind of person I need. 

Of course, you weren’t the perfect boyfriend. But my mom, you, and my brother all told me that I should just date a sweetheart like myself.

 My mother acknowledges that my dad is an asshole but at least he’s there for here when she needs him, whatever she means by that- she’s insecure, and he’s sure of himself, I guess. My brother is a sweetheart who doesn’t want to be together with someone who’s not as sweet as him.

I’m a sweetie, but I can also be stubborn, bad at communicating, and dominate discussions. I want someone who gives me confidence, who gets me out of my shell from time to time. Someone independent who challenges my opinions. I don’t like when someone texts me paragraphs every morning, and I hate to feel obligated to be bubbly every single day. I want someone that I can be sure of at all times, not someone who I have to confirm my love to five times a day. I want independence separate from my partner.

It sounds ungrateful, but I don’t like flowers and I don’t want someone to constantly buy things for me. I want the closest person in my life to be my best friend- he needs to understand me, and tell me when I’m wrong. With sweeties, it’s always me who’s holding all the power and making all the decisions, but I need an equal. Often, I’m too sweet, too giving, too forgiving, too naive- it’s great having someone who reins that in.

Maybe I’m rambling, but that’s just what’s frustrating me. I love having the sweetest people as friends, but I need sugar and spice in a partner.

You said you wanted to take me out for a nice dinner now that you have a job on top of college. You said you wanted to watch the new Star Wars with me. You said you wanted to have a getaway with me again. You used to kiss me on my forehead and hold my hand when we were in the car, and cuddle me even though you don’t like spooning in your sleep, just because I have trouble falling asleep and having you hold me helped.

You would take naps next to me and you’d wake up and be adorable. You would speak to me with a voice that was higher and softer than your voice was for anything you’d say to anyone else. You didn’t completely understand me but you told me that you’d always support me, and I could always cry on your shoulder. And you just got me.

I miss you so much today. I just want to be in your arms again.

#relationships #sappy #shit #breakups #diary #dear diary #welp #bad day

[whatdidugetforvday]

Twinning

hi P.

So today I was dog sitting and having my friend over in the evening.

The pupper was so sweet and awesome! I miss taking him for walks with you.

I also decided to drown my sorrows by online shopping, which feels far better than too much beer- but hello, empty bank account! So yeah, I ordered from Victoria’s Secret. Coincidentally, my yoga pants from when I was in the US five years ago got holes in them just beforehand so now I don’t feel as bad about it anymore. 

My friend and I are like twins with opposite personalities, kind of. We can just sit and be quiet, she’s working on her design project and I’m sewing my Eevee plushie, or we can pause and have giggling fits. She’s so exhausted right now, she almost has worse bags under her eyes than me, and she usually doesn’t have any. 

I have a love hate relationship with small talk right now because on the one hand, I love when I get to talk to someone but on the other hand, I get asked what I’m doing with my life and can’t come up with a good answer every single time.

I’m so tired all the time right now because I can’t fall asleep at night but I have to wake up at normal times still.

I’m hardly even thinking of you. Sometimes I get that sting of missing you, like you’re tugging on my heart from where you’re at. And sometimes I feel nervous about what you think of me now, and whether you’ll contact me again. But most of the time, I’m just going on and thinking about other stuff. I guess that’s a good sign.

I miss the way you looked at me, the way you tucked me in or held my hand or teased me. It all screamed “I love you”. And everything I did screamed “I love you”, too.

#dear diary #daily #daily entry #diary #hey jude

[whatdidugetforvday]

Shouldn’t Have

Well hey there, P.

Tomorrow is the first day that my letter might have realistically reached your letterbox and I’m pretty anxious.

I shouldn’t have downed three whole beers yesterday night. I can’t even handle one properly. Now I have to deal with the aftermath of telling my male friend who apparently wanted to fuck me about when I was the victim of sexual assault- and also the nausea that comes from drinking too much. Also, the last beer resulted in me picking up my parents’ dog and petting him on my lap, on the couch, where he isn’t allowed normally, holding him like a warm furry baby. He was probably wondering what on earth was wrong with his human. You know me, I get annoying when I’m drunk but it’s fun sometimes.

So I started sewing the Eevee plush for my mom and in a whole afternoon I finished one ear. I don’t know how I’m going to try and finish that in like a day or two. 

My American pen pal invited me to New York for my birthday next winter, which makes me really excited! I’ve always wanted to go there and it’d be so great to meet him since he really is a great friend. It would be awesome to really know each other in real life as well.

Talking about real life, I need to figure out what I’m doing this year as soon as possible, but I’m taking my time to feel good as well.

On a side note, my hair is finally not so terrible anymore. But I’m not happy with my body yet, I really need to do more exercise.

I've got such a weird feeling right now. I feel normal most of the time, and not too bothered by you not being with me anymore. But now there are moments where I miss you terribly, and wish for you back, and moments when I get scared of what your reaction might be to me reaching out. I guess time will tell, but I feel a bit hurt even now.

 I miss your scent and your warm tummy and kissing your nose and ears and  the way you can put one sock into the other neatly using only your feet, and your arms around me when I sleep and your hand on my thigh in the car and your creativity and your endless jokes and your love.

Sometimes I feel like I’m stupid because you weren’t the best boyfriend but I care about you so much and still do, and I’m having a hard time getting over you. But then I have the few minutes each day where I feel that all the BS was worth it, you were so damn great and it felt amazing to be with you.

I’m going to bed way too late again, but how can I sleep when I’m feeling so many things at once and have so many possibilities that my head is constantly trying to go through?

#relationships #breakups #diary #dear diary #getting over you #letters to my ex #bad day

[whatdidugetforvday]

Self Care And Stuff

1. Stop over thinking.

2. Accept what is.

3. Don’t compare yourself to others.

4. Do things that scare you. Do things that you’ve been putting off for a long time, or that get you out of your comfort zone.

5. Keep healthy friendships and tend to them like little sweet flowers- or cacti, depending on what you like.

6. Treat yourself. Whether that means taking an extra 15 minutes to play your favorite game, or to order yourself some pizza, or to go out with your friends- do something that makes you happy without feeling guilty.

7. Eat your veggies. Get some fruit, or vegetables, or anything that’s healthy and makes your body function well and feel good- and nosh on that!

8. Stand up for yourself.

9. Catch some fresh air, or try some of those yoga poses that you saved but never really attempted, or do some squats until your legs feel wobbly. Anything that will energize you and make you happy.

10. Distance yourself from social media. Take a little break from all social media, or remind yourself that social media isn’t the real world and things aren’t always the way they seem. Social media presence is everyone’s stage. You don’t usually see behind the scenes.

11. Allow yourself to be emotional. It’s okay to have a bad day, or even a bad month. It’s good to let those tears, the anger, or even the frustration about feeling nothing out. It’s okay to be imperfect, and you should embrace your flaws.

12. Shower, clean up, organize something, do the laundry, get out of bed before you want to, check off some items from your to do list. Do something productive even though you really don’t want to.

13. Help someone or be nice to someone. Even a simple compliment on a dog’s instagram can make you feel better, but helping someone who really needs it makes the whole world better.

14. Do something quiet like reading, drawing, writing, taking a walk. Something that lets you just be for a while forgetting everything, or be in your thoughts.

15. Cook something. Even if it’s just spaghetti with tomato sauce, it feels better to eat something you’ve made yourself.

16. Get a plant, or pet cats and dogs at an animal shelter, or cuddle a stuffed animal. Giving love and caring about something other than yourself makes yourself feel better too.

17. Use a lip balm or lotion or a face mask

18. Light a scented candle, take a bath or wear your coziest clothes.

19. Drink water. If you want an alternative to plain water, you can put a bit of lemon juice into your cold water- it’s refreshing and tastes great (provided you like lemons)

20. Think of an achievable goal in your future, or write something realistic onto your bucket list. 

21. Get out of the house once a day, even if you don’t technically need to.

22. See a therapist. It’s a big, scary step, but it can help you find the tools to deal with tough situations or understand what you’re dealing with.

#self help #self care #relax #reminders #self love #you're okay #think about puppies and butterflies #there is good in the world #i mean look at this doggo