That’s how you know your dm is still pissed about oneshoting his dragon.
“Player: can I cartwheel through the door? Me/dm: sure roll for damage Player: wait what for? Me: you cartwheeled through a door there is a halfling sized hole in it.”
The mission had been accidental. The GFE-8003 had been in the wrong place at the wrong time and needed to restock.
Planet M8b9007 was a dangerous planet, lacking in higher sentient life but it’s floral and fauna rivaled even “Earth” in Maraxx’s opinion.
Maraxx watched Allen for the first bit, fearful that his loud and abrasive demeanor would summon every predator within a fifty mile radius.
To his and the rest of the unit’s amazement, Allen kept low to the ground, in near perfect camouflage because of the coat the engineers had synthasized for them. Making hand gestures to communicate direction as Maraxx led them to a refuel relay.
Then, suddenly they rounded a massive tree and Maraxx almost slammed into a quadrupedal, floral-looking monster. Before Maraxx or the creature could scream out, Allen jumped on it and cut its head off with a knife.
Never before had Maraxx been more reminded that he was dealing with a predatory race. Allen catagorized himself as “willing to eat anything that’s not moving, Marv”. He’d once downed a bottle of Siracha and vodka mix because one of his human coworkers “dared” him to do it.
You can only be around something for so long, without having it harm you, before you forget how dangerous it truly is.
They grabbed the fuel they needed, only facing minor problem. All the while, Allen would be silent, freezing in between slow movement between trees. Signaling for the ship to come in and they could return to the ship. All of them groaning in relief.
Allen, as if he was molting to become a different person began a stream of curses and inbetween groaned, “Man, that thing was ugly! And I thought the Kora-Vahn were ugly as sin.”
Maraxx just stared at him, “Glad to have you back.”
The human rolled his eyes and to Maraxx and rest of his unit’s disgust, loudly popped every joint in his body. “Well, taking a break, I need a drink. Maybe we can head on to Faron-5, I liked the clubs there.”
With that, Allen walked out to report to the Captain, his usually cheering and talkative self, talking a mile a minute as if Maraxx and the others could follow his haphazard stream of topics.
But Maraxx could only look at Allen warily. He remembered those eyes. The dangerous ease he’d wielded that knife as if it was a part of him. Even when Allen walked into a bulkhead door two days after their debriefing he would remember.
Humans were not to be underestimated.
Have you noticed humans crazy ability to be quiet??
Even the most outgoing human is able to keep quiet for long periods of time, especially when it comes to something that all humans deem important. Can you imagine Aliens reactions to this?
Like having a human, his name will be Allen, who is considered loud and obnoxious by his kind, being sent on an important mission involving the utmost silence. All the aliens assume they are going to die and this is not fair, what did they do wrong to cause their captain to assign Allen on their mission?
Yet, as soon as Allen was told of the mission assigned, he had a weird look on his face and nodded, not saying a word. This seemed hopeful, but who knew?
Then, the mission started and even the most quiet alien made slight whisling noises when breathing, but not Allen. Allen was quiet and his face resembled the stone people that all the aliens were told about (statues). He walked without a sound and, if it wasn’t for the rise and fall of his shoulders, the aliens would have sworn he was not breathing.
That “I don’t think our plan is going to work” sums up the atmosphere of that second clip. Award for best DM everyone.
Random question, does anyone have those two videos where the DM of a game first makes a joke video about a really really big minifigure of an old one for his dnd game, and a second one where it’s the big reveal to his party?