askangmar

[askangmar]

Witchy baby pls. What color should I dye my hair?

Hello, anon!

I don’t know but honestly I just get strong purple/violet vibes from you, so I will recommend that. I suggest having a professional do it for you, since all but those with the fairest hair will have to lighten it chemically and that is tricky. However you did not ask for advice on how to colour your hair, only what colour to make it.

The Witch-king has a fondness for Manic Panic’s Ultraviolet and Pravana Vivid Violet.

Having the ability to appear and disappear, and wearing a cowl, and most importantly being an immortal unliving sorcerer, I am fortunate that my hair is always a nonissue.

I hope this helps!

Angmar

#ask angmar #ask the witch-king #nazgûl #questions about fashion #haircolor #angmar answers #angmar #ask the witch king #ask blog

[askangmar]

You can’t spell “cringe” without “ring” so get some advice from everyone’s favorite Cringewraith

#ask angmar #ask the witch-king #nazgûl #my art

[askangmar]

I thought it was your master who put the romance in necromancer?

Hello, Anon.

My rule is that if you are a necromancer, you can use that joke. So technically, I suppose we both put the romance in necromancer.

Platonically,

Angmar

#ask angmar #ask the witch-king #nazgûl #questions about sauron #necromancy #romance #angmar answers

[askangmar]

What is your favorite method of getting revenge? Asking for... a friend

Hello, Anon.

I’m sure you’re expecting something gruesome or sketchy or evil. But my favorite method of revenge is to live (or, in my own case, un-live?) well, be true to yourself, and give no fucks whatsoever about those who would seek to cut me down. They are worth no energy of mine and should be worth no energy of yours your friend’s.

People will fuck up their own lives and you wanna be able to pettily watch that shit from afar.

Avenging myself by being cooler than my enemies since the mid-second age,

Angmar

#ask angmar #ask the witch-king #nazgûl #questions about life #revenge #angmar answers

[askangmar]

Thoughts on Galadriel?

Greetings!

I think Lady Galadriel is a reasonable and wise ruler who could have been a great ally if only Mr Baggins (the younger) would have been more insistent with his gift of the Ring. You know what they say… If you liked it, then you shoulda put a ring on it.

However… since she decided to go into the west and remain Galadriel, Isuggest we could perhaps sway Beyoncé, who is definitely already a Queen.

Food for thought,

Angmar

#ask angmar #ask the witch-king #nazgûl #questions about other people #galadriel #angmar answers

[askangmar]

Angmar is better than Anor. Thank for building the coolest kingdom on the north

Hello, Anon.

Thank YOU for supporting the great and noble kingdom of Angmar!

Keep being awesome,

Angmar

#ask angmar #ask the witch-king #nazgûl #questions about places #not actually a question #angmar answers #angmar

[askangmar]

How do I bake a cake?

Hello Anonymous,

I suggest you use a cake pan and an oven.

My favorite cake recipe follows.

The Witch-King’s Kahlua Chocolate Cake

1 package Devils Food Cake

1 package jello instant chocolate pudding (4oz or 5.5oz)

4 eggs

3/4 cup Kahlua liqueur

1/2 cup water

1/2 cup vegetable oil

Preheat oven to 350°F/175°C

Prepare a Bundt pan of your choosing (lightly spray a nonstick pan with oil or cooking spray—I use a coconut oil aerosol—or grease and lightly flour pans that are not nonstick)

Wait for the oven to come up to the cooking temperature before you combine the ingredients; the texture is better if the batter does not sit out

Combine all ingredients in a bowl, and beat on medium about 2 min (stand/electric mixer) or with a mixing spoon by hand about 3-5min, until smooth

Pour batter into Bundt pan and tap sides gently to level

Immediately put cake into oven

Bake 55 min

Let cool in pan for 25 minutes then invert onto cake plate or other serving item

Sprinkle with confectioner’s sugar & serve to your friends and enemies

Enjoy,

The Witch-King

#ask angmar #ask the witch-king #nazgûl #questions about food and drink #angmar answers #kahlua cake #angmar’s recipes #cooking with angmar

[askangmar]

Get highly coveted advice and answers from the Nazgûl who puts the “Romance” in “Necromancer”

[askangmar]

ಠ_ಠ

[askangmar]

It’s very relaxing

What was all this about you and Angmar in a steam sauana? 😏

Uhhhhhh….Angmar you wanna take this one?

[askangmar]

Sounds like people are curious about getting steamed and more

What was all this about you and Angmar in a steam sauana? 😏

Uhhhhhh….Angmar you wanna take this one?

[askangmar]

Don’t see why not, I’m not doing anything else right now.

*opens door to what is clearly a shed*

Step into my office

I got this, anon

You and Angmar KISS. NOW

Im too sad to make out :(

[askangmar]

Wait, nobody told me about this

You and Angmar KISS. NOW

Im too sad to make out :(

[askangmar]

What’s that modern saying?

“I’ve never seen a ring plug a hole”

It’s like that , but... Er... wait.

I’ve never seen a ring unplug a hole.

Hmm. Weird that consensual nazgul sex would be the thing people get hung up on about you.

People get hung up on a lot of things with me, I guess it’s just my nature. Feel free to ask me other questions though!

[askangmar]

How do you feel about the return of eru?

Hello, Anon!

I am feeling pretty good about it, surprisingly enough. He seems like a cool guy, though I admittedly haven’t spent much time thinking about it. Time will tell!

Love,

Angmar

#ask angmar #ask the witch-king #angmar answers #questions about other people #eru

[askangmar]

🍿

This is prime incomprehensible elf drama, that’s all I know. I’m here for it.

Are you adopted?

piece of shit greyface, what the fuck kind of question is that? are you hinting something, uh? you wanna catch these hands?! MY BOYFRIEND WILL BOIL YOU ALIVE

[askangmar]

As long as @ask-thingol passes out in someone else’s yard this time I can’t see anything that could possibly go wrong with this idea.

Time for Nazgûl Brunch Club, Valinor Edition 🥰🔥🍾🍹🥂

@saurons-advice we need to talk about messing with my creations…

#eru gets invited to the party #thingol invites himself #what could go wrong #nazgûl brunch club #brunch #the witch king makes a friend