bigmeatpete69420

[bigmeatpete69420]

Usterswe

uterus? no. weterus

[bigmeatpete69420]

Full video here of this gastropod-specialized snake actually eating the snail, I just think these first few seconds are the new funniest thing in the world somehow

[bigmeatpete69420]

It's never too late to learn a new skill! Who knows maybe you have some innate ability previously unknown about

Just watch out for illusion spells you never know what you're gonna see

@bigmeatpete69420 guess how it was being treated by the Argonian healer? (I can't believe I'm talking about this... like this)

[bigmeatpete69420]

Seems more like a punishment from dibellas than a blessing but go off!

Teleportation spell gooder for more than one thing

@bigmeatpete69420 guess how it was being treated by the Argonian healer? (I can't believe I'm talking about this... like this)

[bigmeatpete69420]

You, a heroic paladin have successfully slain a fearsome dragon. But the dragon warns you that death is but a door, and dragons don’t die, they reincarnate. You paid it no mind….until your son was born with golden, slitted eyes.

[bigmeatpete69420]

Lawn mushrooms

#mushrooms #fungi #fungus #mycology

[bigmeatpete69420]

Lawn mushrooms

#mushrooms #fungi #fungus #mycology

[bigmeatpete69420]

Spongebob SquarePants

List of media where the title is significantly more accurate than you expect going in:

- Jojo's Bizarre Adventure

- Everything Everywhere All At Once

- The Thing

[bigmeatpete69420]

The way people end phone calls

Things that work in fiction but not real life

torture getting reliable information out of people

knocking someone out to harmlessly incapacitate them for like an hour

jumping into water from staggering heights and surviving the fall completely intact

calling the police to deescalate a situation

rafting your way off a desert island

correctly profiling total strangers based on vibes

effectively operating every computer by typing and nothing else

ripping an IV out of your arm without consequences

heterosexual cowboy

[bigmeatpete69420]

Efficiency, brief serendipity

Brevity, everyone looks the same to me

Trepidation, contemplate self conflagration

[bigmeatpete69420]

#rose #red rose #classic red rose #bigmeatpetegarden #flower #red flower

[bigmeatpete69420]

#hydrangea #bigmeatpetegarden

[bigmeatpete69420]

I’m so sorry babes anytics and marketing don’t get you like I get you 😢

#“why's this show putting cults in such a bad light? Nah I don't think this'll get an audience.” #because scientology owns the people who killed this

[bigmeatpete69420]

when i say i wish people started using the reblog button more i don't mean it in a 'i want more notes' kind of way i mean it in a 'i want to read about your thoughts on this particular thing' and 'i want to have conversations in the tags' and 'i want this to feel like a community again and not like any of those boring social media platforms where artists are content creators and interactions never goes beyond a like'

[bigmeatpete69420]

The current state of pop girlies is so funny like

Ariana Grande: getting dragged for homewrecking with the guy who played SpongeBob in the SpongeBob musical

Taylor Swift: dropping her worst album in years about how deeply obsessed she is with Matty Healy

Billie Eilish, for some reason:

#queen shit

[bigmeatpete69420]

i hate when i send someone a meme in another language and they're like "uhm... translate? 😒" fucker i sent you a meme where 90% of the words have an english cognate and/or you don't need to know what they're saying to find it funny. can you at least TRY

#french

[bigmeatpete69420]

Brother Gregor never spoke and often spooked the neophytes with his appearance, but he was a gentle soul and a phenomenal cook and knew more ways to prepare a fish than the abbot knew hymns