dandelionpath

[dandelionpath]

smh... there has been a recent spike in activity in my house again, which feels like a completely different being.

Which means my upstairs neighbors are either back in their uneducated woo-woo shit and have managed to invite something else in OR (I think more likely) they accidentally left a standing invation that something else took advantage of.

Regardless, I'm going to have to ward our space so whatever is going on can stay up their with them and I am absolutely ✨️trash✨️ at any kind of banishing/warding. I can cleanse and that's about it in that department, so it will certainly be a challenge for me to make more than a wet paperbag level of defense.

#oh this is some really good advice !!! #having physical elements to wards was such a gamechanger for me when I started doing that #protection #warding

[dandelionpath]

I've been trying to figure out how to lay out my thoughts in a way that will be understandable and readable, but not too confined... still not sure how to do that, but let's just leap into it and figure it out later!

anyways! I am working on DBT through a local group/class, and I am also slowly stepping back into some aspects of spiritualism.

today I was listening to a podcast that touched on this, and last night I had a very strange and insistent dream about this, and yesterday I had the sudden realization regarding all this as well - I keep finding myself caught up in black-and-white thinking/all-or-nothing thinking, willfulness, and the inability to just Experience things.

When I sit down or pause for a mindfulness practice, I'm focused on doing it Correctly, and doing it Well, doing it Best. Never on the actual practice of just being. just existing and being present. There's always a goal. I can never seem to just let myself experience the moment.

And there's a certain black-and-white, all-or-nothing thinking to this, and there's definitely a willfulness aspect to it. Willfilness is not always a negative thing, but in this case it is unhelpful at best, and actively damaging at worst. I want to always be improving, to be doing things to the best of my abilities, and this is definitely not a bad thing always! But I get so caught up in it that I cannot think of anything else, and there isn't any balance. It's all-or-nothing. If I don't do it to the best of my abilities, then I've failed and shouldn't have done it at all. If I don't come across perfectly the way I wanted to, then I may as well have just kept myself isolated and not tried to connect at all. I must always be striving for the best; I can never let myself just exist, experience, feel things as they happen, be in the moment.

And I think I need to start working with the reminder that there is no perfect. There is no ultimate goal. There is no finishing. There will always be more to learn, more work to do, more suffering to experience (and more joy), more opportunities.

There will be a constant push-and-pull when it comes to the brain. The work will never be "done". A state of constant contentment will never be reached. This is all just a pendulum swinging - I will be constantly working to arrive in the middle. And when I reach the middle, I will celebrate and experience a state of contentment for a moment, and then I will find myself swinging one direction and have to course-correct to find my way back into the middle. And that is how things are, and this is okay.

I am allowed to just experience. I am allowed to just exist. It is good to work on things, but the moment I start fighting how things Are or clinging to something too tightly, then there is an issue. Adjustments can be made to steer things in the right direction, but things can rarely ever be forced.

Also would be good to go back to basics on things. I am aiming for so high that I can't even reach it, and climbing for it is only causing my hands to bleed and make it more difficult. I need to build the ladder rung by rung to reach the high-up spot. I never got the chance to build the basic skills, and have had to bandaid over them to learn the higher-level skills to catch up and keep myself safe, but I have some space now to go back and learn those basic skills to fill those gaps. I can re-learn and pave over some wrongly learned skills as well!

#comets posts #comets path #i feel like this reads as a bunch of nonsense but tbh this is just for me because I cannot keep a traditional journal LOL #I'm just trying to write it down before I lose all of it entirely #and then I can sort through it later when the brain is playing nice and will let me work through difficult things

[dandelionpath]

anyone want to see some 2018/19 era Loki shenanigan doodles?

pretty sure the two duo poses were taken from silly pose bases on pinterest but this was four yrs ago so I honestly have no idea LMAO

#also i was at a hockey game (the only one I've been to in my life lol) for the first and third image #i think i was at school for the second drawing #comets posts #flames can make a hearth

[dandelionpath]

man i know I've been getting back into mindfulness and spirituality but that dream I had last night was so painfully on the nose regarding my thinking about how everything may be connected via energy and how we may all be small within everything else LMAO

there was imagery of the earth being folded into the universe and then the "camera" zoomed out and we saw the milky way being folded into itself into a ball shape (similar to earth's shape) and then from there another zoom-out and the same folding into a sphere happened to the universe as a whole and then we were looking at just a void with the universe as a ball (with two cartoonish eyes for some reason), small within the nothingness. at that point things started to lose the plot a bit (as dreams tend to do) but there was some grand presence that sent this little universe ball to school within the void with a bunch of other universes, so I could technically glean meaning from that as well I suppose, but MAINLY the dream was carrying symbolism similar to horton hears a who, which is ... pretty funny, all things considered

#very strange! it is one of the strangest dreams I've had in a while #usually its all just the same sort of horrific trauma nightmares every night lmao #so while this one did end up being a nightmare in the end... it wasnt trauma related (as far as i can tell) #it may also have been influenced by me watching jerma play seaman as I fell asleep though ngl SBDHDJDL #comets posts

[dandelionpath]

hmmm okay so I'm doing a DBT class (I have hated CBT and mindfulness and found them essentially wholly unhelpful, and I've disliked DBT in the past, but this one actually is promising so far) and I've also recently gotten back into some meditation stuff so ... I may post about that? It's either going to be me journalling in a physical book or posting notes and findings on here; I haven't quite decided yet!

Just as a "here's what to expect and let me know if you're interested in that" sort of thing!

#gotten back into a podcast that I really loved a couple years ago that talks about all sorts of things #and through that im taking steps back into meditation and things :) lines up really well with the DBT class! #comets posts

[dandelionpath]

Six years of this blog!! That's crazy! Before this one, I had an alternate account called briars-witching, and I know a few of y'all came over here when I switched blogs. Absolutely wild, thanks to those who have stuck around so long, and welcome on in to any new faces as well :]

#comets posts

[dandelionpath]

And just to follow up on that previous reblog without derailing it: a lot of the really weird relationships and discourse that exist out there in the neo-pagan, Satanist, and atheist communities are in fact echoes of the weird relationship that Xtianity has with Judaism.

Xtianity has a weird, tumultuous relationship with Judaism because they must simultaneously validate the Tanakh and the Jews who created it or else their own religion is devoid of context and built on a house of cards. But! If they validate Judaism, then they have to grapple with the fact that the Jews did not accept their interpretation of the Tanakh, that we still, against all odds, exist, and that because we still exist, we are still around to point out the ways in which the New Testament does not fit with the Tanakh and that the Tanakh does not inherently or naturally point to Jesus. And that's to say nothing of the bloody history of Xtianity towards Judaism. Our continued existence is a sore point and a weakness in the Xtian narrative that has been a constant source of irritation, frustration, and violence since the dawn of Xtianity. And, at the same time, there is a certain fascination with Judaism related to things that have been appropriated by Xtians or understood as particularly useful in spreading supercessionist ideas. So what you wind up with is a toxic mix of antisemitism and philosemitism (effectively fetishization and orientalism) that drives too many Xtians to "love" us by attacking our beliefs and way of life, and stealing whatever they think will be most helpful in their mission (especially as it pertains to Jews) in order to try and convert us.**

Many people who have also been hurt from inside of Xtianity or by the broader Xtian culture they live in seek to deconstruct those ideas by creating an inverse of Xtianity in one way or another. Those who turn to Satanism typically do this by worshipping the opposite force of the Xtian god. Those who turn to neo-paganism typically do this by embracing an unambiguously polytheistic religion and/or by turning to the cultural historical enemies of Xtianity. Those who turn to atheism typically do this by rejecting "God," "faith," and "organized religion" (as these concepts are understood by Xtian norms.)

And honestly? That's fine. If it helps, if it brings you meaning and joy, knock yourselves out. I have no problem with people turning to these beliefs for reasons of healing as well as simply being drawn to it. And for what it's worth, I did a similar thing by turning to Judaism. Obviously I had many other reasons for becoming a Jew as well, and I assume that's true for the aforementioned folks, too. Judaism healed a lot of Xtianity-shaped wounds for me, and if your paganism, Satanism, and/or atheism helps you in the same way as well as bringing you meaning, I sincerely wish you the best.

However, the problem is that many times, unless you turn to Judaism and learn our side of the story, it's very difficult to deconstruct the antisemitism of your past entanglement with Xtianity. Xtian antisemitism has permeated western society so thoroughly for so long that it is real *work* to identify and unlearn it. Those converting to Judaism have the benefit of the Jewish community and extensive educational resources to help. Other folks do not.

Here's the problem: if you simply invert Xtian ideas, you are still treating Xtianity as the baseline reality from which your other assumptions and beliefs flow. If you just choose the opposite at every chance, you divorce yourself from Xtianity, but not its prejudices.

Now you might fairly ask, "hey Avital, if we are making the opposite choice at every turn, wouldn't that invert the antisemitism to being at least neutral if not positive towards Judaism?" And that would be perfectly logical! But unfortunately deeply and (for us) dangerously incorrect.

The reason is because (1) antisemitism has never been rational but reactionary instead, (2) philosemitism is also bad, and (3) it is structured in a way that it's pretty much always "heads I win, tails you lose." Have you ever noticed that according to antisemites, Jews are both ultra-white and also dirty foreign middle eastern invaders? That we are supposedly very powerful and run the world, but are also weak and degenerate? That both the Right and the Left have extensive antisemitism problems? Etc.? There's a reason - it's because antisemitism is designed to other us no matter what. So oftentimes I see folks inverting Xtian philosemitism to being "those awful fundamentalist Old Testamenters" or inverting Xtian antisemitism to valorizing Judaism, but only to the extent that they can meme-ify our religion down to fighting God and/or being un-pious godless liberals.

But like other groups, we are a diverse and complicated group with a very long history and a lot of trauma to boot.

If you're trying to unpack your Xtian conditioning, please also unpack your antisemitism and philosemitism. If not for our sake and for it being the right thing to do, at least do it for yourselves, because unless you deconstruct that as well, you will still be operating within a really ugly aspect of a Xtian mindset.

(**Please note that this isn't literally all Xtians everywhere, but it is a lot of Xtians in most places and throughout most of history. There are absolutely Xtians who are good allies to Jews, but they are much smaller in number and are swimming upstream in their relationship to both Jews and Xtianity.)

#antisemitism

[dandelionpath]

hello !! i have a few general pieces of advice, since it'll depend highly on your own practice, path, and the kind of fae you'll be getting involved with !

first of all, reading! read whatever you can get your hands on! be curious, be open, be thoughtful, be willing to find information from unexpected places! if you take in a bunch of info, then once you start getting into working with the fae firsthand, you'll have a large collection of information already tucked away in your brain to figure out what was truth and what was fiction.

secondly, and probably a little more difficult, have a guide if you're able to find one! a deity, a trusted spirit, a mentor, etc! reach out to any spirits or deities you already work with and ask if any of them have any social connections to the fae - you might be in luck! this helps a lot because then you have a foot in the door already to start with, and if you mess up at all with the fae you'll have somebody they already know to vouch for you that it was an accident and help you to clean up any mess, plus it's just helpful to have someone there to guide you through interactions or at the very least give you a 101 lesson before you go out into the wide world of fae working.

third and final piece of advice is to go slow! you can of course dive in as quick as you like, but I personally advise a slooowww start with fae workings. it can be tricky and overwhelming and you may find yourself suddenly slipping to be way in over your head if you go too fast. know your limits, play within it and all that. also make sure you figure out your own boundaries around things, I find a lot of fae to be easier to work with if I am firm on what I am or am not okay with doing/experiencing/etc. it's important to be flexible, yes, but its equally important to know where your hard boundaries lie! don't let anyone push you into anything you're not okay with!

I'm really interested in developing a relationship with The Fae but I don't know where to start, can someone give me some tips and firsthand experiences? The Fae have interested me for awhile and the only reason I haven't tried communing with them is because they scare the shit out of me. But I really like facing things that scare me so any help is appreciated. And if someone reading this doesn't have any knowledge it would be greatly appreciated if you would reblog or send this post to someone who does have the knowledge I seek. Thanks!

#also be creative and have fun! creativity and flexibility seems to be important with most fae! (but again! boundaries are also important!) #also it probably goes without saying but be sure to have protections in place and figured out beforehand! have an escape/way out of things! #just in case things start to go a too sour (dont abandon things too quickly though bc sometimes theyre just testing limits) #i hope this helps somewhat! i know its all pretty general and widely applicable but it's difficult to give specific advice #because its all so dependent on your path and practice and the specific fae and area you're working within! #fae #comets additions #spirit work

[dandelionpath]

I’m working on some beginner materials to put out…eventually. But I think my advice is pretty much summed up with: 

give thanks/offerings to your ancestors - even if you didn’t like the ones you knew, I promise you’d like someone back there; doesn’t have to be daily but regularly and water counts

give thanks/offerings to the land - I don’t care where you are or if you like where you are, you’re only there because the land allows it; doesn’t have to be daily but regularly and water counts

pick a divination tool and use it - ideally pick 2; it’s very fashionable to study things in witchblr but expertise rests on a solid foundation of use; tarot, geomancy, dice, bibliomancy, and scrying are all great

pick a guiding philosophy/source of wisdom - a lot of paganism consists of practices which do not in of themselves guide how you should move through the world or make decisions; can be a philosophy, motto, or other religion

these are to me is what I’d consider the bare minimum but here’s the bonus round:

on each planet’s day, give thanks/offer to that planet - moon on monday, mars on tuesday, mercury on wednesday, jupiter on thursday, venus on friday, saturn on saturday, sun on sunday - water counts but they do love frankincense

track the moon - a lot of people are big into phases, I prefer tracking what sign she’s in; each month she will conjunct with every planet in the sky so tracking her a good way to stay aware of those influences

learn a method of cleansing self + space - fav instructions here; physical cleansing should always be a part of it if at all possible; smoke (incense, bound herbs), sound (clapping, snapping, singing, ringing), and energetic scraping are all good options

learn a method of warding self + space - go beyond visualization; witches bottle, salting, symbols of protection above a door, creating or appeasing a guarding spirit are all good options

learn a basic method of petition or spellcasting - a simple way to start is asking the spirits you’ve already been working with like your ancestors and the land and giving them a little extra back

decide on a small tradition for holidays - as you add in holidays, pick one small tradition to try to replicate next year; eating apples at Mabon, leaving an extra plate out at Samhain, lighting a candle on the stove for Imbolc, etc

doing these sorts of things for a year will honestly get you a lot further than most in my experience. these are a solid foundation from which to build in basically whatever direction you want. earnest practice beats passive theorizing and consumption any day. 

[dandelionpath]

Afternoon offering to Loki. Sponge cake, fresh strawberries and whipped cream.

#IM SO GLAD TO SEE THIS BACK FHSGJKL #spongecakegate

[dandelionpath]

Keeping an eye on if any more weevils come into the house, because it seems like perhaps Loki has switched from spiders (I have developed genuine arachnophobia lmao) to weevils for getting my attention when I'm being really stubborn

I had THREE weevils in the span of two days, and they were in very odd places (halfway up the shower wall for example), and as soon as I acknowledged Loki and made sure to keep checking in with him throughout the day, there haven't been any more?

Not taking this as fact though yet because it might've just been a wild happenstance that three ended up in that room so close together in time. We'll see! If I keep up with Loki and don't see any more weevils then I'll be a little more leaning towards a metaphysical explanation for it :]

#i am working very hard to keep my head firmly on my shoulders this time around with my path and metaphysical workings #I struggle with various mental health things that make it extremely difficult to stay grounded in reality esp when I'm struggling a lot #so I'm keeping a close eye on my mental state and grip on reality this time fsdjkl no delusions for me this time! #i never posted anything that fell into my delusions on here btw (afaik) - all of that was kept to myself bc it was all very distressing #so anything on here is (again only afaik! i might be incorrect or misremembering!) what i consider to be real experiences w the metaphysica #comets posts #flames can make a hearth #comets path #comets deity work

[dandelionpath]

I tried to make myself do individual replies to everyone who's chimed in on this but I think that is too much for me to do with where I'm at energy-wise, so instead I'll just do a big overall reply this way and hopefully that suffices :')

Anyways: Thank you! So very much! Everyone's given me a lot to chew on and take heart in, and it's helped more than I can express honestly. I am so grateful that so many people were kind and reached out with advice or comfort, and I appreciate it more than I can say💙

I have made progress on things since I posted this (only a day or two ago!) because of everyone's kind and helpful words! I feel like something has shifted in me and things feel like they're coming much more naturally to me now, and I've also spoken with Loki about things and we're working things out now! I feel genuine lasting hope for my practice/path for the first time in ... possibly two years, so thank you all again!!

I really appreciate everything, and I would tag everyone who's replied but that feels like it'd be annoying or overbearing to do, so I'll just have to hope everyone who has replied/reblogged sees this so they can receive my gratitude 💙 I truly am so grateful for the kind words from everyone!!

I'm not going to lie - I have no idea how to get back into working with Loki. my brain is so scattered nowadays and I have an incredibly bad memory and I feel terrified of fucking things up. I keep trying to figure out how to make it work but I try and nothing seems to click into place and it's all feeling far too difficult. And then I start to think maybe Loki doesn't want to work with me anymore, despite the assurances I've received that he still definitely does. But at this point ... what really is there in it for him when I'm like this? I feel like I'm far too much work than it's worth for him.

I'm just not sure what to do but it tears me up inside to give up on this; I desperately want to have him back in my life but I feel like something is getting in the way and I just keep clawing at it to try to get over it and back to Loki but failing miserably and ending up scratching myself all up instead.

#I am so ... I'm trying to think of the correct word for it #I feel so much gratitude and joy and hope just from the fact that I reached out for help and people responded with such kindness #I was not expecting that at all ;-; It means a lot that people are so kind and caring!! #comets posts

[dandelionpath]

Hi Comet! I saw your post about Loki (although I don't work with him, he used to be /very/ interested in working with me when I was with Thor) and I just want to say that I think it'll be okay. I'm not sure what you've tried so far but it sounds like a lot of anxiety is building up, or trauma resurfacing that might be skewing things a little bit. Have you talked with Loki about this, your fears? It's very possible he might have suggestions to help. Don't go in thinking you need to go back to how your practice was before your break, what matters is that you both want to work on it (and I know secondhand and some first hand experience that Loki is LOUD and very stubborn when he wants something). I would start with baby steps, very small steps just to get back into it. Even just talking to him or putting on some music you think he'd like. Loki WILL tell you if you mess up, of that I am very sure of, so try to relax a little. You're working with a deity that obviously cares about you a lot and has seen you through some things, you guys already have history, I would think he already knows how you work and is more than willing to help you out or to just patiently wait. I've experienced this myself many, many times and it normally is the shame spiral or guilt that's holding me back vs anything actually wrong (although it couldn't hurt to do a cleanse or similar at the very least it might help you center yourself).

I'm rooting for you! Here if you need to talk :3

Hiya Shiloh!! Good to see you :]

This has helped SO much honestly, and I don't want to say too much publicly because there is a lot of trauma stuff and just even general mental health stuff going on it turns out, but all the things you said here have really helped me flip a page in my brain and start moving forward properly for the first time in like,,, a couple years honestly :')💙

Thank you so so so much for the kind words and advice, this has helped SO very much and I am so grateful for the help and kindness ;-; 💙 (Also the cleansing recommendation was definitely needed omg I lowkey (haha) forgot that that was a thing that actually helps, I've been out of my practice for FAR too long it seems!)

#genuinely though this has helped me so much and i cannot overstate how grateful i am ;O; #comet answers #comets posts #flames can make a hearth #save

[dandelionpath]

So. Meditation.

I expect that a lot of you just cringed. Meditation is often presented as a cure-all, much like exercise is. And just like exercise, it's presented in a moralized way that fails to account for people who struggle to "just do it". In fact, in many ways it is worse- at least with exercise, you have sports, weightlifting, and running as classics that are widely known. With meditation, the only way generally spoken about is the "sit down and clear your mind" style. If there's only one way to do something, a large number of people are going to be completely unable to do it.

What meditation is supposed to do is to get you grounded in the present moment. It's supposed to help you tune back into yourself and the immediate world around you. Yes, I know that sounds like woo. Think of it as... an extended grounding exercise.

Here are some accommodations for various problems I've seen people have with it.

It puts you to sleep? Do it before bed and before naps.

Can't sit for an extended period of time? Take whatever position is comfortable. You also don't have to do it for long periods of time. Sometimes I set aside like five minutes to chill out and meditate to ground myself, and it has noticeable benefits for me.

Can't sit still? Walk. A park would be awesome, but just a room you can pace around works. If you really have to stay in one place, rock or sway. The key is that you want a rhythmic movement that you don't have to actively think about. I know at least one person who dances.

Distracted by the world around you? Focus on the input of one of your senses. Put all your processing power into hearing everything around you, or seeing everything, or feeling everything you can touch. The last one creates a great use for any fun rocks you have; you can roll them over in your hands and feel every part of them, and just experience the Texture. An advanced version of this is trying it with two senses.

Unable to clear your mind at all? Take your thoughts, start examining and untangling them. Then, organize them and figure out where they go in your mind. Why are you having this thought? Where should it be classified? I like thinking of the thoughts as books that need to be shelved correctly. This won't get rid of the thoughts, but it works as a form of meditation because you're thinking about the thoughts rather than just thinking them.

If you have another problem with meditation, please feel free to bring it up, and I'll see if there's anything I know that might help. It still won't be for everyone. Nothing is. But having more ways more widely known will expand the number of people who benefit.

#meditation

[dandelionpath]

I'm not going to lie - I have no idea how to get back into working with Loki. my brain is so scattered nowadays and I have an incredibly bad memory and I feel terrified of fucking things up. I keep trying to figure out how to make it work but I try and nothing seems to click into place and it's all feeling far too difficult. And then I start to think maybe Loki doesn't want to work with me anymore, despite the assurances I've received that he still definitely does. But at this point ... what really is there in it for him when I'm like this? I feel like I'm far too much work than it's worth for him.

I'm just not sure what to do but it tears me up inside to give up on this; I desperately want to have him back in my life but I feel like something is getting in the way and I just keep clawing at it to try to get over it and back to Loki but failing miserably and ending up scratching myself all up instead.

#comets posts #comets path #lokean #putting it in the main tag because maybe someone will have something to help ;-; I'm at the end of my rope here #I don't know what else to try or what else to do!! I feel so confused and lost on it all

[dandelionpath]

Silk panty with ravens and dandelions // FRKSlingerie

#i will always love maria's Odin design SO much (and loki ofc) #art #odin

[dandelionpath]

im understanding why people are reactive actually see bc I have always had to be quiet and sneaky and vigilant while angry growing up. its loki weaseling his way out of the grasp of the enemy. it’s not cathartic at all. i need to hit bad guy with hammer i get it now thor sorry for slandering your methods

#ough. #loki #flames can make a hearth