enden-agolor

[enden-agolor]

I apologize for all the irl life posting and stuff recently. I'm going to stop talking about it online from this point on, but if I do have good news on the situation then I'll post an update on that in the future. In the meantime I'll do my best to going back to posting just mcsm stuff.

#i appreciate all the love and support in my inbox but i cant get to all of it #it means a lot to me though #i just want to go back to minecraft funny posting

[enden-agolor]

Hey enden! I just wanted to reach out as I know these are hard times for you. I’ve been wanting to say something and give you some support, but I have never known what to say, so I’m just gonna wing it.

First off, I would like to preface by saying you are an incredibly humble artist and writer. You carry great talent, yet you seem to almost expect people to not notice that. Never forget your talent, and that even something you spill out at 2am will most definitely be praised. You inspire me to create, I have been in a art and writing slump for so long. I got caught up in life and lost the love for it. You’ve lit that spark in me once more and want to get me creating, and most definitely writing, in honor of you!! That’s amazing man. You have some real special talent, and the mcsm fandom alongside others are seriously so so lucky to have you.

Second, I send nothing but love and support to you and your boyfriend. I know everything will work out just as you guys need it to. If she doesn’t get her karma legally, she most definitely will another way. I know you guys are so strong and will pull through with flying colors!! Death of a loved one is never ever easy, and the worst always happens to the best people. Know that none of what happened is your fault, don’t let guilt consume you, and both of you take care of and love yourselves. You guys seriously deserve it.

Lastly, on a less dreary note, I would like to ask if you had any fan fiction prompts for Jesskas? I want to write so bad, but I cannot come up with a proper idea that is really interesting and solid, yanno? I want to write something long, that I can really pour my heart out into. So if you had any tips or story prompts, it would seriously be appreciated, and you of course would get a huge shoutout, as you would with or without helping me since you are such a huge inspiration to me.

Best of wishes Enden!!

This may be a long response, so here-

First off, I suppose you are right when you say I don't really expect people to enjoy the content I create. It's not an easy concept for me to grasp. I have a lot of trouble seeing how people can like my stuff so much, or god even say I'm their favorite mcsm artist when there's so many others out there that carry so much more skill with colors and backgrounds and such. I know I'm not supposed to compare myself to others, but it is an incredibly hard habit to end. It's why I'm so shocked when I see actual fanart of my aus, or god even my writing. I cannot go back and read me own works for the life of me because I just cringe so bad at it, so when people say it's good I really just have to trust them and believe it.

All I could ever dream to do is inspire people to create and grow with their own imagination, so hearing that my stuff has done that sort of thing for you (and others who have told me the same) it brings me so much joy, but it truly is entirely hard to believe that it's me and not someone else being the one to do that. I don't know, but I am very honored to hear this from you. It only inspires me to push myself further and I don't know. Maybe some day I can push my imposter syndrome aside and really get a firm grasp on my full potential and be proud of it.

And thank you for the love and support towards our situation... As the days go by I fear more and more that that woman will get to keep her dog and nothing will come out of this other than we just have to move past it. So I hope you're right when you say she'll get her karma some other way. I've never in my life wished something bad to happen to someone. Not like this... So if karma does catch her, let it be as devastating to her as it was to us.

Now, real life shenanigans aside, we can get to the jesskas stuff 😏

For fanfic prompts, I always suggest exploring canon before getting into anything truly ambitious. If there's a certain scene in the game you'd like to further explore and add on to- do it! Like I've always wanted to write a fic that gets into a deep emotional moment between Jesse and Lukas after Jesse rescues Lukas and Petra from the Nether during episode 8 and they all enter the player dorms for the night. Just those off screen moments where you can take the characters and add more to the story is easy and fun in itself. I always like to look deep into the emotional aspect of it all, and really dive into how the characters might be feeling after a situation and how that gentle moment alone together could bring them closer. What I already mentioned being a good example because it's directly after PAMA, Jesse having to watch Lukas and Petra(or Ivor) die, and so on. There's a LOT of feelings to explore there. If that's something you'd want to try and tackle, go for it!! But if there's another scene from the game that really sticks out to you that you feel could be so much more, go for that too. It's good to start small and practice how you want to write the characters. Only reason I started a huge fic like Recovery straight away was because I'd been rping jesskas for like a year and a half already and was confident I knew how to write the characters and I wanted to do more for the little community by writing a nice big fic.

And again, it's Minecraft. There's a whole world to explore and put these two right in the middle of it. Think up certain scenarios you like and add on to it! Like if there's a certain scene you really want to do, build to it. Give the characters a goal and put obstacles in the way so you can really flesh them out on the way to that goal. What made them want to go there? How do they get there? What do they do when they get there? How do they communicate with others that might also be there? And how differently do they treat eachother compared to how they treat the others? Those are all things you really want to know ahead of time. Also pay attention to the scenery. Really look into the visuals your mind creates and do your best to get into the details about it all. There's a lot to get into with writing, and the best part about it is you're in complete control, so go crazy with your imagination, especially since it's Minecraft. It could be entirely self indulgent, or even something out of your comfort zone. No matter what it is, it's still growth and it's still progress to being a better writer. Just make sure you're having fun.

Also, thanks for taking the time to send this ask. I appreciate you 🩷

#ask

[enden-agolor]

im waiting so incredibly patiently for your forest deity au fic im looking forward to it heavy

Oh man me too. I've already got down what the first three chapters are going to look like so now I just need to write them. I'm still working on another fic at the moment, and it's coming along nicely, but I'll have to wait until that one is finished before I can start on this big new project. I'm super excited for it though, and I hope fans of the au like it.

#ask

[enden-agolor]

haha silly man has crush on forest deity i wonder what will happen????!1? (From @enden-agolor ‘s AU (please check it out if you haven’t already it’s so cool!!!!!)) (also these designs were made by enden, remember that 😐🫵)

i love them they are so silly <3

#oh my goodness hehe i love this so much #you captured lukas' image quite perfectly #and i love big deity jesse in the background just oblivious #hanging out with his little forest creatures #its so endearing #adorable art dude #forest deity au #favorite

[enden-agolor]

Jeez I have a LOT of asks to get to. I apologize for the wait on them. I'll try to get to them soon 🫶

[enden-agolor]

Oh my goodness... I have so many words for this, let's hope I can find them-

Firstly, I kind of just sat here at the dinner table speechless in shock looking at this. Somehow your art always finds a way to genuinely stun me, like to my core. The artwork is so beautiful, I can hardly believe it's real. I showed Andy and it made him smile so much. For that I find endless thanks to you. You've been bringing us both so much joy with your art, I just wish I could put all my feelings into words to bring forth the reality of how much I truly adore your artwork.

I LOOOVE the way you drew Enden. He's perfect?? And Shiro is such a goofy little guy, you captured his image flawlessly. And I mean that. He always was our goofy goober. Andy also said he's never seen such amazingly rendered art of his sona, and that he loves it so much.

We're going to make a print of this and frame it to our wall, if you don't mind. I've been wanting to do the same with your forest deity au fanart, because honestly? It's something I find myself coming back to frequently during these tough times. It continues to inspire us both to work on the au.

Anyways, long story short, I love this so much, and you brought so much joy to Andy and I both for this. I promise your hard work on this went a long ways. The colors, the scenery, the characters. Perfect. Amazing work as always dude and I am forever looking forward to seeing more from you. 🩵

Oh my god, am I really late? About the main thing, I have no words. I was very upset when I found out about Shiro. Maybe I don’t understand this pain because I have to see it too, but then I wanted to hug you from the bottom of my heart. I hope this art will bring you only good memories (seriously, I was afraid it might be the other way around).

I also hope Andy's thumb feels good. (That feeling when you can’t scratch something under the cast hahahaha is terrible)

Your care for each other is so strong, it warms soul so much. I believe in you, you are great.

#favorite #fav art #this really did make me feel so much better #thank you so much dude #we'll cherish this art forever

[enden-agolor]

How are you and your boyfriend doing?

I just want you to know that you're amazing. You make my day and night with all of the homosexual cube males (and of course the homosexual cube females and the other cubes) and I hope you're doing better. I only want good luck to find you in the future. I know it's tough losing someone you love, I understand what it feels like. Just know that you can do this. I believe in you man! Keep up the amazing art and have a good day/night!

Hey there, and thanks so much for reaching out...

Before I get into how we are doing, I just wanted to say thank you for taking your time to say this. We really appreciate it, and I love so dearly that you enjoy my silly block art. I still have a lot of trouble wrapping my head around that, especially as of late, that people actually like it so much. I have trouble accepting so much praise, but jeez does it go a long way. So thank you. 🩷

As for how we are doing

We are okay. We now know the woman who did this, and we also have a lawyer too. Animal control was no help (no surprise there) so we are mostly relying on the lawyer for help us figure out what to do next.

Andy went back to the doctor recently to get his cast removed and reapplied. His thumb was looked at, and while the sight is... very unpleasant to look at, they say he's healing nicely. Looks like he'll be keeping his thumb. Yahoo!

We also got Shiro back. Bro is in a little brown box now. Our little minecraft brown brick. I've been through animal death more times than I'd like to admit, and I cannot go into detail about that here, nor will I ever in public probably, but I know with my experience that I will be okay. My main concern is Andy, because Shiro was his best friend. The trauma of the event is unholy, especially for him. I'm taking care of him the best I can through these tough times. Feed him, bathe him, take care of the house and animals. Definitely a Recovery moment (as he likes to call it 💀) In the end, Andy is very strong. The strongest person I know. He's tough and has a heart of pure gold. I know he'll be okay. Sudden loss is terrible and changes you as a person, but life must go on and I know we will be okay. We just have to live our lives in honor of our sweet little guy. It's what he'd want.

Everything Shiro taught us and we taught him will be carried along to a new friend in the future whenever we are ready for it, so in a sense, Shiro is still very much with us in the way he impacted our lives and will continue to do so in the future. Even if he is gone, he'll always be our baby boy and I know I'll see him again some day.

#ask #tw animal death #cw animal death #tw mentions of death #hopefully this isnt too dark to post #i hope i will have good news to bring about all this in the future #i dont know though

[enden-agolor]

im going to eat a brick i love your art wtfffff wtf wtfff OTS SO GOOD AAAGGHH I LOVE THE WAY YOU DRAW THE FUNNY BLOCK GUYS SO MUGH AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHGHGEHDWFYUHJIKNM THEY MAKE ME WANT TO EAT BRICKS

thank you so much 🥹 reading this made my night 🩷

#ask

[enden-agolor]

in your forest AU, is jesse big n stupid? (scientific purposes)

No, he's extremely intelligent. He's still the same Jesse we know and love, just very, very scarred and hurt deep down. His lack of speech doesn't make it impossible for him to communicate though. Once I get to writing the fic, you'll see what I mean. The only thing he's truly "dumb" with is affection and feelings and stuff. He's spent a decade or so without any positive human interaction, so it's hard for him to get back into that realm of emotion.

#ask #forest deity au #he is big tho #just not stupid #and when lukas compliments him he could probably be seen scratching his head trying to wrap his mind around that #scratching his head with stick like cave man

[enden-agolor]

have some stuff and things

#my brain is so fried #art is kinda hard rn so ive been mostly writing but heres some doodles n stuff #mcsm #my art #minecraft story mode #mcsm fanart #forest deity au #jesskas #jesse mcsm #lukas mcsm

[enden-agolor]

In your forest deity au, Jesse's like a bear constantly being hunted and Lukas is like a rabbit whos soft and lovable

you are so right dude and also i am sorry for this

#my art #forest deity au

[enden-agolor]

i may be quiet for a while but just know i AM thinking of them

#ngl they are my coping mechanism rn 🤪 #the story is coming along nicely #i hope people like it #forest deity au #my art

[enden-agolor]

Hai!!! I know this might not b much but I wanted 2 submit a lil Forest Deity au doodle to potentially cheer u up in trying times

This au is still in its early stages but it’s already helped me get thru tough times irl & I rlly appreciate u & ur bf for writing it :3 keep being swag 💜💜💜

Aww I love it, they're so sweet. Thanks so much for taking the time to draw them. I'm happy to hear you enjoy the au that much, even as early on as it is. We've been doing a bit better, and this definitely cheers me up. Appreciate it a ton 🩵

#ask #forest deity au

[enden-agolor]

An update:

Thank you to everyone who has reached out to me and my boyfriend Andy during these horrible times. We're still working really hard with animal control to find the woman and her dog responsible for the death of our little Shiro. She needs to be held accountable for his death and the medical expenses for Andy's emergency surgery. If we do find her, there will be a lawsuit. I have a feeling it's going to be a very long and rough road ahead. All the support we've had from friends, family and from the followers that have reached out, we appreciate it more than you could ever know. Thank you.

Hi everyone.

This isn't something I'd typically post, but this loss has absolutely devastated me.

This is Shiro. He's been one of my bf's and I's best friends for 5 years now. He was going to turn 6 in July. Shiro passed away on Tuesday in one of the most tragic and unexpected ways possible. I'm still trying to wrap my head around it. I cannot believe this is happening. My heart is so broken.

His passing was not of natural causes, and I will not rest until we have justice for him.

I may not be online as much for a while. Art and writing is my comfort as well as my passion, but we just need time to grieve for our sweet baby boy.

Thanks for understanding and I hope to be back soon.

#im sorry to be posting stuff like this #i know its a bummer #i hope to be posting art again soon #tw animal death #cw animal death

[enden-agolor]

I'm starting to slowly return. Here in the second picture I was thinking about what Lukas would look like in Jesse's shirts from Ask. I think the look of him in the kitchen in the morning would be incredibly cute and homely. By the way, I was also thinking about what Jesse’s house from the forest AU would look like. Will it be on stilts or a stone foundation? or it doesn’t have a foundation… There will be a hut made of solid logs or boards, rectangular or complex in shape… Oh, this will be an interesting adventure in Minecraft for today or tomorrow, otherwise rip my right hand. I’ll go make full-fledged art, otherwise I’ve been putting it off for already counts on fingers for months..5? oh my god there are several of them! (here is the unboxing of the torso haha)

I’m pretty sure I’ve been doing this a lot. This type of shit is generated in my head every day

#dude im going to be real with you this brought the first genuine smiles to me and my bf in days #we needed this so bad #your art is always so gorgeous #and i love how beautifully you honor our au #thank you so much for everything you do #i still cant wait to write this fic but it will take some time #i love the long cape on jesse its like a big ol blanket #something to help make lukas feel safe and happy #and all your doodles are precious #also god DAMN that admin and lukas in those last two pictures #ok I'll be honest those are the ones that made us smile and be like 👀 #oh fucking hell yes #lukas boy you are about to get it #anyways thank you so much for the art #it made me feel so much better #forest deity au #also #jesse has a cabin! its not huge but it is built for someone very tall #its quite messy for someone who has stopped caring about himself and knowing no ones coming to visit #only when he finally feels safe enough to bring lukas in does he actually start cleaning up

[enden-agolor]

Hi everyone.

This isn't something I'd typically post, but this loss has absolutely devastated me.

This is Shiro. He's been one of my bf's and I's best friends for 5 years now. He was going to turn 6 in July. Shiro passed away on Tuesday in one of the most tragic and unexpected ways possible. I'm still trying to wrap my head around it. I cannot believe this is happening. My heart is so broken.

His passing was not of natural causes, and I will not rest until we have justice for him.

I may not be online as much for a while. Art and writing is my comfort as well as my passion, but we just need time to grieve for our sweet baby boy.

Thanks for understanding and I hope to be back soon.

#i miss him so much i just dont know what to do anymore #cw animal death #tw animal death

[enden-agolor]

LUKE WEARING JESSE SHIRT I CANNOT IM DYING RN 😭😭😭

I love to think he wears Jesse's shirt aaall the time. The shirt is nice and snug on Jesse, but still pretty long so he tucks the rest into his pants, so when Lukas wears it, it's like massive and resting right on his hips. Like he'll go to bed wearing just that and his boxers and he's comfy happy cozy. Also Jesse lends it to him on days where he's not feeling well, or days where Jesse has to leave for a long period of time. Lukas definitely wears it as a comfort thing and he adores the smell on it. Smells just like Jesse's cologne and natural scents. That, and Jesse thinks Lukas looks really really cute in it. Especially when he's just got out of bed and his hair is all messy (mostly just the top because the rest of his hair on the back of his head is short and scruffy).

Unfortunately Jesse is a bit too big to wear Lukas' clothes 😔 But it's okay because Lukas buys him shirts and stuff with Jesse in mind and that in itself feels so special to Jesse, he ends up smiling in the mirror more often when he's wearing what Lukas gets him.

#ask