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fantasyescapes17 · 9 months

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This is War (the Soldier I)

Lieutenant Colonel Lee Jihoon isn't sure exactly why he's fighting this war or if he's even on the right side. He only knows two things: one, his brother Joshua's death was not an accident; and two, the Empire has no shortage of dark secrets waiting to be uncovered.

Genre: dystopian!AU, war!AU

Warnings: Violence, war, general death and devastation, strong language, character deaths, sexual themes (no explicit smut, only implication), dark themes overall, slow burn and plot-heavy. There's nothing you wouldn't find in a typical dystopian YA novel, but its still not for the light-hearted.

Word Count: 10.7k+ [Won't lie, this is 10k words of pure plot and world build-up. The reader and half the important characters haven't even appeared yet, and the romance hasn't started. Buckle up, we're in for a long ride.]

Prologue + Masterlist

Marcet Sine Adversario Virtus.

The ancient Latin phrase was engraved on an imposing metal plaque underneath a large statue of the Empire's emblem.

A delicate golden rose with thorns.

Lieutenant Colonel Lee Jihoon sat at his desk directly in front of that rose statue. The statue was a permanent fixture in the cabins of all high-ranking military personnel stationed at Military Base 1. The golden rose and metal plaque served as a reminder to the cabin's visitors that they were not merely addressing Lieutenant Colonel Lee, but an esteemed officer of the Empire.

Military Base 1 was a staggering edifice. The walls and buildings were made of dark bullet-proof glass that soared into the skies, looming far above the crumbling tenements that formed the rest of the city. It was located in the heart of the Empire. An impenetrable fortress behind which the Empire’s loyal military officers strategized ways to protect their dwindling population.

Military Base 1 was the bedrock of the Empire. The harsh thorns which protected the delicate rose within.

“Sir? May I come in?”

Lieutenant Colonel Lee Jihoon looked up to find Captain Kwon standing hesitantly in the doorway of the cabin. The young Captain’s eyes lingered uncomfortably on the golden rose, before he briskly saluted his commanding officer.

Jihoon nodded.

“Come in, Captain Kwon. At ease.”

Captain Kwon Soonyoung entered. The cabin's walls were covered with military insignia and medals reflecting Lieutenant Colonel Lee’s numerous achievements. He had obtained many colourful laurels during his short but successful military career. While impressive, the laurels could not fully distract Soonyoung from the gaudy golden rose that glimmered threateningly behind Lee Jihoon’s unsmiling face.

“Here to report, sir.”

Jihoon nodded and stood. He had been sitting at his desk all morning, and his legs were beginning to feel stiff. There was no space to move around with that infernal rose statue taking up half of his cabin.

He leaned against the desk and looked at Captain Kwon.

“I heard there was some commotion in the barracks earlier. Any cause for concern?”

Captain Kwon bit his lip. “Not at all, sir. It was a minor tussle between some of the newer recruits. They, uh, snuck an illegally recorded copy of Vesta’s new film into the barracks. I had to confiscate it from them.”

Jihoon raised an eyebrow. “And where is the film now?”

Captain Kwon blushed. “Sir?”

“I hope you didn’t keep it.”

“I-sir-”

“Dispose of it immediately,” Lieutenant Colonel Lee ordered. His handsome face was unsmiling. “You may cancel training for today and let the men have the evening off. The Brigadier-General is hosting an unveiling party for the new unmanned combat vehicles- all the high-ranked officers will be occupied anyway.”

Captain Kwon smiled brightly. An evening off sounded excellent.

“Ah-yes, sir.”

“I don’t want to see you or the men putting themselves at risk for trifles. If they want to watch Vesta’s new film, tell them to pay money and watch it honestly in the theatre.”

“Of course, sir. Thank you, sir.”

The corner of Lieutenant Colonel Lee’s lips curved upward in a hint of a smile.

“What are you thanking me for?”

Captain Kwon cleared his throat awkwardly.

“I’d be lying if I said that Vesta’s films don’t go a long way to boost morale among the men, sir. She’s captured many hearts in the barracks. They would give up their lives for her, just as soon as they’d give up their lives for the Empire. Beautiful women are every man’s weakness.”

“Hopefully not every man,” Lieutenant Colonel Lee muttered.

Captain Kwon hesitated, worried that he had offended his commanding officer. It was difficult to predict how Lieutenant Colonel Lee would respond to any given statement. Jihoon was famously impulsive.

“Of course not, sir. I only meant to say-”

“You’re dismissed, Captain Kwon. Have a nice evening.”

“T-thank you, sir. You too, sir.”

Lieutenant Colonel Lee Jihoon leaned against his desk as he watched his subordinate leave. Then he closed his files and straightened his military uniform. He would have to meet the Brigadier-General for another night of drinking and raunchy entertainment, under the facade of unveiling newly designed unmanned combat vehicles.

What a criminal waste of time, Jihoon thought to himself, when there are so many more sinister things taking place in this very Military Base.

As Jihoon walked out of the cabin, he glanced back once more at the enormous thorned rose and the ancient Latin phrase. The symbols of the Empire.

Marcet Sine Adversario Virtus.

Or, in the modern tongue, valour withers without an adversary.

He smiled wryly at the foolishness of the Empire’s ancient motto. Evidently, the people in charge had been in a hurry to justify the war they were starting and had not considered one crucial possibility.

What if the Empire’s biggest adversary was not outside its walls?

What if it was hiding deep within?

—----------------------------------------------

Research Division 3 (or RD-3, as it was often abbreviated) was the military’s golden child.

Every few months, the scientists up at RD-3 designed a glamorous new weapon of warfare, which was unveiled and paraded around at a special display for high-ranking officers. Each new weapon brought the Empire a step closer to winning the war against the Invaders, so celebration was deemed appropriate.

In truth, the displays were simply an excuse for the commanding officers of Military Base 1 to gamble, drink and cavort with women.

Deep down, humans were all the same.

“Lieutenant Colonel Lee! You’re late, as always!” the Brigadier-General called out in his booming voice. The large older man was extremely drunk. His gray beard was stained from spilled wine, and he wrapped an arm around Jihoon in a friendly manner. The Brigadier-General had never had much regard for personal space. “How is it that you’re always the first to arrive at the military briefings, but you can never turn up to a party in time, eh?”

Jihoon forced his lips into a tight smile. “I apologise, sir. I had to finish my reports for the day.”

“Surely an unfiled report has never hurt anybody!”

“I’d rather not find out, sir.”

Lee Jihoon had acquired a reputation as a passionate and loyal young officer of the Empire. The Brigadier-General may have been a drunkard, but he was no idiot. The older man knew that Jihoon was destined for great things. It would not hurt to keep the promising young officer close as he climbed the ranks.

“Excellent work, Lieutenant Colonel Lee. Officers like you keep the Empire safe.”

“Thank you, sir.”

“I know you don’t enjoy these unveiling parties but we must let RD-3 show off their little toys, eh? It’s the least we can do. But I know what will cheer you up! We have a special guest today, and she’s an absolute beauty. Come and have a look at her.”

Jihoon accepted the glass of wine offered to him and followed the Brigadier-General into the crowd of people.

The unveiling party was held in the ballroom of Military Base 1’s recreation wing. The enormous hall buzzed with high-ranking military officials, their wives and other entertainers. A group of scantily-clad dancers occupied the stage. A lady in red crooned into the microphone.

“Now, where did that pretty little thing go?” the Brigadier-General wondered.

Jihoon’s hawk eyes took three seconds to scan the room and spot what his superior officer was looking for. Near the back of the ballroom, a group of male officers were crowded around a beautiful young woman. She had a stunning smile, and batted her eyelashes prettily at the eager men surrounding her.

Jihoon sighed. He was unimpressed. “Sir, do you mean-”

“There she is!”

The Brigadier-General made a bee-line for the beautiful actress. Jihoon struggled to keep up. Some of the younger officers scattered at the sight of the Brigadier-General, but Vesta’s pretty eyes sparkled.

She gave the older man a sultry smile.

“Oh, Brigadier-General! I was beginning to wonder if you’d left me alone,” Vesta cooed. It was evident that she was not alone. There were half a dozen men around her, but the actress was an expert at flattering officers of rank.

The Brigadier-General grinned foolishly. “Never, my dear, never. I only stepped away to welcome Lieutenant Colonel Lee to the party. He’s a bit uptight, you see, and he needs some company at these gatherings. Lieutenant Colonel Lee, this is Vesta. Of course you recognize the most beautiful woman in the Empire.”

Jihoon barely glanced at the actress and nodded. “I am familiar with your work.”

Vesta giggled inspidly. “Oh, he’s so stiff!”

“Yes, Jihoon can be rather serious, but he’s a good man. Never mind him, darling. Tell us that lovely story about filming The Last Commander,” the Brigadier- General insisted.

Vesta began retelling an anecdote about how she had been moved to cry real tears in the climactic scene where her character’s husband was revealed to have died on the battlefield. The men listened, riveted.

Jihoon watched the actress disinterestedly for a few moments, before finishing his glass of wine and looking around in hopes of a refill.

He needed air.

There had been a time when Lieutenant Colonel Lee enjoyed gatherings like these. Early in his budding military career, he had felt it was an honour to be invited to a weapons unveiling. Now, Jihoon only wished there existed some alcohol or drug strong enough to make him forget the entirety of these events.

He sauntered outside.

Adjoining the ballroom was an outdoor platform that served as an enormous balcony and helipad. Men and women in white lab coats scurried around the sparkly new unmanned combat vehicle and prepared it for the display. The ‘vehicle’, with the words Aeris VII labelled on the side was actually a drone the size of a small helicopter, made entirely of bulletproof fibreglass.

Jihoon sighed. It looked exactly like all the other aerial combat vehicles the military already possessed.

“What’s so special about this one?” he asked a passing dark-haired scientist in a white coat who didn't appear busy.

The scientist blinked at Jihoon, his expression suddenly changing as he eyed Jihoon's military uniform and the pin on his shoulder signifying his rank.

“Sorry, sir?” the man asked.

“What is so special about this one? Didn’t RD-3 release an unmanned aerial combat vehicle three months ago? What does this one do better than the last?” Jihoon asked.

The scientist looked nervous. Jihoon suddenly realised that even though he was wearing a white coat, there was no patch on the scientist's chest signifying that he was an employee of RD-3. All the other white coats bore patches of either RD-2 or RD-3.

“Uh, I’m not-I’m not part of the design team for this. I was just observing,” explained the scientist carefully.

“What team are you a part of?”

The scientist’s eyes darted back and forth nervously. He seemed uncomfortable under Jihoon’s curious gaze. “I’m under Research Division 1, my apologies. The weapons are handled by RD-3…”

Something struck Jihoon as odd. He had never met anyone from Research Division 1 before. To be perfectly honest, he wasn’t even entirely sure what Research Division 1 did. Was the work highly confidential? It wasn't talked about as much as RD-3’s warfare weapons, or RD-2’s agricultural research. He suddenly remembered hearing about it long ago, from a familiar voice...

“What does Research Division 1-”

“Excuse me, I need to leave.”

The scientist hurried back inside the crowded ballroom and Jihoon stared after him, a sour taste in his mouth. Something was wrong about the way that scientist had been looking at him. Did he know Jihoon? Did he have reason to keep something from him? Jihoon wasn’t sure, but his interest had been piqued.

What did Research Division 1 do?

Where had Jihoon heard about it and why did the dark-haired scientist look familiar?

“Sir, can I help you?” another of the white-coated scientists asked. This woman had a large smile on her face and a patch on her chest that read RD-3. She looked far more welcoming than the previous man. “Are you curious about the new design for the unmanned aerial combat vehicle? We’d love to give you a briefing!”

Jihoon blinked and nodded. “Yes, thank you.”

“The upgraded vehicle is more aerodynamic. It’s lighter, it can carry heavier missiles and it moves faster. We’ve also fixed some failures in the defensive capability of the bulletproof fibreglass. This one can withstand open fire for longer than the older models…”

Jihoon had lost interest.

------------------------------------------------

At exactly 11 pm, the senior military officials gathered in the balcony of the ballroom to watch the new unmanned aerial combat vehicle soar spectacularly into the sky for the first time. Jihoon, uninterested in the theatrics of the display, quietly slipped out of the back of the building and into the dimly lit streets of Military Base 1.

A sleek black car with dark windows was parked at the end of the street. Opening the passenger side door swiftly, Jihoon slid into the back. There was a clicking noise behind him once he closed it.

The car doors had been locked.

“Cigarette?” Vesta offered. Her fingernails were painted a bold red, which contrasted with the plain white of the cigarette wrapper. A half-empty pack was lying on the seat between them. The car reeked of smoke.

This was clearly not her first cigarette of the evening.

Jihoon shook his head. “No, thank you. I’m trying to quit.”

Vesta raised an eyebrow. The pretty, innocent, simpering young lady from the party had disappeared. The actress now slouched carelessly against the leather seats. Her bare feet were crossed and planted on the backrest of the passenger seat in front of her.

She placed the cigarette between her painted lips.

“Mind if I smoke?” she asked, moving to light it before Jihoon could speak.

“Joshua didn’t like you smoking.”

“Joshua’s dead,” Vesta replied harshly as she dropped the lighter and took a long, shaky drag.

“He was worried about your health-”

“There are more disgusting substances entering my body on a daily basis than tobacco, for fuck’s sake. Cut me some slack,” Vesta snapped. She took another long drag before her face relaxed and she chuckled. “Great job pretending not to know me back there. I’m familiar with your work? You could have at least pretended to be a fan.”

Jihoon frowned. It was all he could think to say on such short notice. He hadn’t expected to see Vesta at the unveiling party, and there was no reason for him to be acquainted with a successful actress like her. At least, no reason that could be spoken about openly under the watchful eye of the Empire. They needed to appear to be perfect strangers in public.

Which wasn’t difficult because in truth, they were strangers.

Jihoon didn’t know Vesta's likes and dislikes, or what sort of a person she was. He knew nothing about her past or present life. All Jihoon knew was that they shared one simple thing.

Love, for a man who was now dead.

“How is it going?” Vesta asked. The dark tinted car windows were shut so the smoke she exhaled remained inside the car. It was suffocating. Jihoon glanced longingly at the cigarettes and closed his eyes.He had not had a cigarette since Joshua’s death. It had been four months and he wasn’t about to give in now.

“How is what going?” Jihoon wondered.

Vesta chuckled. “Your attempts to be transferred to the Border Forces. Is anyone taking you seriously or are they telling you to be a good little boy and wait? You can tell me. I have plenty of experience being patronised.”

“It’s not easy.”

“Nothing is easy in this place.”

Jihoon folded his arms across his chest and frowned. “It took two years before Joshua’s application to be transferred to the Border Forces was accepted by high command. I doubt they’ll accept mine anytime soon. I’m not as friendly with the high-ranking officers as Joshua was.”

“You’re not as friendly as Joshua was, period.”

Jihoon gave her a frustrated look. He was tired of her sharp words and unconcerned attitude. Vesta seemed to be treating Joshua’s death with a sense of carelessness that infuriated him. Couldn’t she at least pretend to care?

“Yes, thank you. I’m trying to find out the secret behind the death of a man that meant the world to me. I assumed from the fact that he sent you a similar letter that he meant something to you. Maybe I was wrong.”

Vesta lowered her eyes. “You’re not wrong.”

“So what is your problem?”

“My problem? My problem is that I’m tired of being in love with a man who’s dead, Jihoon. They don’t award you medals for that sort of loyalty. I’m in this shit alone because Lieutenant Colonel Joshua Hong thought it was a good idea to go chasing after something that he should have kept his fucking nose out of,” Vesta snapped.

Her eyes were red as she lifted the cigarette to her lips once more.

“Joshua really wouldn’t want you to keep smoking that-”

“Fuck you,” Vesta replied. She reached down and aggressively stubbed the half-finished cigarette into her ashtray, putting it out. “I don’t even want it anymore. Are you happy that you’ve taken away the one thing that actually makes me happy in this world, Lee Jihoon?”

Jihoon rolled his eyes.

“I didn’t take anything away. You put it out yourself.”

Vesta stared at him in disbelief. She felt a burning anger flow through her as she met Jihoon’s calm and judgemental eyes. Was this what Joshua had left her? After all his tall promises and romantic words he had gotten himself killed, leaving behind a dark secret and his insufferable younger half-brother to babysit?

“What are we doing, Jihoon?” she demanded.

“We’re trying to find out why Joshua had to die.”

“And then what? Even if Joshua was right, if there is some dark secret in Military Base 1 and he was killed because he knew too much… what next? We don’t have a plan. We don’t have support. How do you intend to exact revenge against whoever is responsible by yourself, Jihoon? You, and whose army?”

Jihoon bristled. “I have a battalion.”

Vesta laughed scornfully. “No. You don’t have a battalion. The Empire has a battalion that they put you in charge of, and they can take it away from you anytime they please.”

“Then we’ll build a new army. We’ll find someone with whom our interests align. There’s a whole world outside of Military Base 1. Rebel organisations, an enormous organised resistance underground. I’ve seen glimpses of it during peacekeeping missions. I know it exists. We could be a part of it,” Jihoon insisted heatedly.

“Why, though?”

“What?”

“Why would you join a resistance? What has the Empire ever done to you that you would rebel against it?” Vesta demanded.

“There’s definitely something happening. Joshua died less than a week after he left for the Border Forces-” Jihoon insisted.

“He died in the course of duty.”

“That’s what they say.”

“You have nothing that proves otherwise, Jihoon. Nothing. None of the high-ranking commanders of the Border Forces will speak to you. You don’t know what Joshua was investigating. All you have is a vaguely worded letter from a man who died after being transferred to the most dangerous division of the military. The Empire even awarded him a posthumous medal for bravery. I’m tired. I don’t know how much longer we should keep doing this.”

Jihoon clenched his fists. “I know this is difficult-”

“It’s impossible. Do you understand how helpless you are in this world? How helpless and alone we both are?”

“I have leads. Just trust me for a little longer. I need to find out why Joshua had to die, I know I can. I can find the people responsible and I need your help.”

Vesta and Jihoon stared at each other for a long moment. It was difficult to read the young woman; she was an actress, after all, and her words and expressions often changed so swiftly and erratically that it was hard to tell just where the actress ended and the real woman began. Jihoon had a feeling that he hadn’t even scratched the surface of whatever Vesta really was. Jihoon didn’t have the time, energy or inclination to dig below her abrasive personality.

But Joshua had trusted her.

So Jihoon had decided that he would trust her too.

“Fine,” Vesta replied, finally. “Tell me what you want me to do.”

“Do you know anything about Research Division 1? What sort of work do they do?” Jihoon wondered. “I remember Joshua mentioning it once, but I can’t remember what he said.”

“Research Division 1? Does that even exist?”

“If 2 and 3 exist then isn’t it logical to assume that RD-1 exists too? Is there anyone you can ask to learn something about that?” Jihoon asked. There were a lot of questions that would arouse suspicion coming from an officer of the military, but might sound harmless coming from a seemingly air-headed actress.

“I’m meeting Major-General Jung in his apartment tomorrow, I can ask him. Why do you want to know?”

“Just a hunch. See if he’ll say anything about the Border Forces too-”

“I’ve tried that before. The Major-General never talks about the Border Forces, even when he’s drunk. He sobers up as soon as I mention it and it’s unpleasant because things are a lot easier for me when he’s not sober,” Vesta replied firmly.

Jihoon groaned. “He knows something.”

“It’s no use to us if he won’t talk about it. Just because he's reluctant to reveal confidential military information doesn’t mean it’s anything to do with Joshua's death.”

“Can you search his personal office?”

“Do you want me to die?” Vesta snapped. “Because if your aim is to unite me with Joshua in heaven then that would be the perfect way to go about it. The Major-General’s home is filled with security officers at all times. He keeps himself well protected. The rebels would love to take a crack at the commander of the Internal Peacekeeping Forces.”

Jihoon sighed. “Never mind.”

“I’ll get in touch with you if I have anything to tell you, okay?”

“Fine, I get it.”

“Go back before they notice you’re missing from the weapons unveiling,” Vesta suggested. Jihoon nodded. He unlocked the car door and then glanced back at the actress. He cleared his throat.

“Take-uh, take care.”

Vesta smiled emotionlessly. “Sure. As soon as I find something worth taking care of.”

—---------------------------------------------

Once upon a time, the Empire had been a peaceful place.

Jihoon had grown up during those times but he could barely remember them. He had vague memories of his mother’s flower garden and the smell of her home-cooked pies. He had once gone to school. He had family and neighbours and friends. What had happened to them all? Jihoon wasn’t sure. He hadn’t seen any of them since the first Air Strikes.

Air Strike Zero was the starting of the War.

Jihoon remembered huddling in the basement of their small house with his mother and his half-brother Joshua, terrified and not understanding what was happening as the ground shook and explosives fell from the sky.

It was only three days later, when they emerged from their basement, cold and hungry, that they learned the truth.

The War had begun.

Joshua had never been one to sit still. Long before the military had declared mandatory conscription for all able-bodied men, Joshua signed up to fight. We have to protect ourselves, Joshua had said the night before he left. We are at War.

Jihoon had stayed home with his mother until he turned 18. But she had always been of fragile health, and a world at war was no place for her. The older woman's heart gave out and Jihoon had to bury her two weeks before his 18th birthday. Then he enlisted for the army and joined his brother in the ranks. Theirs was not the only family that had been torn apart by the War.

The War either killed you, or made a soldier out of you.

Jihoon chose to be a soldier.

—-------------------------------------------

Captain Kwon’s face was white.

“Sir, we seem to… um, we seem to be missing some items from the weapons storage, sir.”

Lieutenant Colonel Lee Jihoon snapped his head up to look at the trembling man in front of him.

His dark eyes narrowed dangerously.

“What?”

“Lieutenant Smith did inventory this morning and we’re missing some firearms from Storage Unit 7B,” Captain Kwon repeated. His heartbeat thudded wildly. Kwon Soonyoung dreaded delivering news to the Lieutenant Colonel. Having to deliver bad news to him was simply dreadful.

"And? Where are they?"

Captain Kwon swallowed. “We’re investigating to find out how we could have lost them. There’s no sign of breaking or entering in the storage unit so it might have been somebody who knew the passcode or had access-”

“Captain Kwon.”

“Y-yes, sir?”

Jihoon stood up and slapped his palms on the desk, hard. His voice was enraged. “Do you think I give a flying fuck who it might have been? I want to know who it was!”

Captain Kwon swallowed. “Yes, sir. Of course, sir. We’re working on that right now, sir.”

Jihoon pressed his fingertips to his temples. “How many weapons are we missing? What kind? Give me an estimate.”

“Primarily firearms. Lieutenant Smith has found 10 assault rifles, 12 semi-automatic rifles, 3 grenade launchers and a couple of pistols unaccounted for. We’re also doing an emergency inventory check of all the other Storage Units under our control to make sure this is the only storage unit that was targeted,” Captain Kwon rambled on. Perhaps if he kept talking rapidly, then Jihoon wouldn’t have time to yell at him. “There aren’t many soldiers with access to Storage Unit 7B in particular so it must have been someone who was on security duty at some point-”

Jihoon lifted a hand in the air and cut him off. “How many is a couple of pistols?”

Captain Kwon swallowed. “Thirty-five, sir.”

“Thirty-five?” Jihoon demanded. That amounted to a total of 60 deadly firearms. Sixty firearms was no small theft. It was enough to keep a small army going. A small army which was evidently not affiliated to the Empire, or they could have obtained the weapons without committing military treason.

Captain Kwon looked devastated. “Yes, sir.”

“You have two hours to find out who did this before I come down into the barracks and investigate the matter myself. This is likely the work of some rebel organization. That means we have traitors of the Empire here. Traitors. In my battalion. Do you understand the seriousness of this situation, Captain Kwon?”

“Yes sir, I do, sir.”

“Good.”

Captain Kwon shifted on his feet and then cleared his throat. If he was about to be put to death following a court martial then he really wanted to know sooner rather than later.

“Sir, are you… are you going to be reporting this matter to high command?”

Jihoon folded his arms across his chest. He had no intention of putting his own neck on the line this early. The Empire would not take high-grade weapons being stolen directly from Military Base 1 lightly.

There would be hell to pay if the culprit was not found.

“Let’s try to find who did this first. In the absence of anyone else to punish, Captain Kwon, high command may just decide that you and I will be held responsible. I would rather it didn’t come to that.”

“Of course, sir.”

“Find me the traitor. Now. Dismissed.”

-------------------------------------------------

Lieutenant Colonel Lee Jihoon carried his brother’s final letter tucked in the pocket of his military uniform at all times. The folded paper was worn out from having been read so often over the last four months, and every single word was precious to him.

Jihoon,

I’m sorry I couldn’t say goodbye before I left. My request to transfer to the Border Forces was accepted on extremely short notice. I leave tonight.

There is something I’ve been investigating. I’ve had my suspicions about the Empire for a long time, but I think I’ve finally found some evidence. I need to go to the Border to confirm my suspicions. When I return I’ll explain everything. If I’m right, then everything we know about our lives could be a lie.

I’m scared.

I hope I’m wrong. I really hope I’m wrong.

If I don’t return, that means the Major-General knows what I’ve found. Don’t trust anyone in the military, Jihoon. Especially not the high command. They don’t care about our lives. All they care about is themselves. They’ve done horrible things in the name of research and war and they’ll stop at nothing to protect their positions.

Tell Vesta I’m sorry. I wanted to help her but I think I ended up making her life worse. You would probably laugh, Jihoon. I wish I could see the incredulous look on your face when I tell you I fell in love with her. I’m sorry I couldn’t introduce her to you. Maybe, when I return, you can meet her and you’ll see how wonderful she is.

I want to make you both proud. I hope I can.

I love you. Stay safe

-Joshua.

Sometimes Jihoon wondered if his brother had intended to leave him in a state of complete agony. Could a more vague and incomprehensible letter exist? Why couldn’t Joshua have stopped to explain exactly what he was investigating? Life would have been easier even if Joshua had just gone to the Border without leaving a letter at all.

At least then, Jihoon could have believed that his brother had died bravely in the line of duty, as the Empire claimed.

Peace of mind can be more valuable than the truth.

Jihoon possessed neither.

“Sir? Your written communications have just come in,” a young officer on administrative duty entered the cabin and saluted Lieutenant Colonel Lee before placing a pile of envelopes on the desk. Jihoon quickly tucked the letter into his inner coat pocket and sat up.

“Thank you, Private. Dismissed.”

“Yes, sir.”

Jihoon looked at the envelopes. All of them were stamped and sealed with the Empire’s emblem; the golden rose with thorns. Most were non-urgent. Field reports, requests for leave and other routine mundane tasks relevant to the maintenance of his forces. There were a handful of invitations to social events being held by high-ranking officers.

Then Jihoon saw it.

The only envelope where the rose was hand-drawn instead of stamped with the official Empire stamp. The difference was slight and difficult to notice for an untrained eye, but Jihoon and Vesta had been communicating in this manner for long enough that he instantly knew the envelope was from her.

He tore it open.

Asked about RD-1. It's old- it existed even before the Air Strikes, but was shut down shortly after the War began for ethical reasons. Something about human experimentation. Major-General wouldn't elaborate. RD-1 hasn’t been operational for about a decade, so I don’t think it has anything to do with Joshua.

He also wouldn’t talk about the Border Forces. He never does.

I heard that the Major General is looking for some new personal security. He’s not allowed to take on-duty soldiers for his personal use, so he hires whoever he can find men from the disciplinary barracks- ones undergoing punishment for frivolous things. Do you have any men we can trust? If you could get them into the disciplinary barracks by tomorrow, then it’s likely they’ll be chosen. Make sure whoever you pick looks a little naive. The man doesn’t like his guards to be smarter than him.

Lots of concerns about rebel uprisings on the coast. Civilians aren’t complying with the food rationing laws and are hoarding their own farming and fishing produce.

I’ll be at the Brigadier-General’s wedding anniversary party this weekend. See you there.

Jihoon tore up the letter and reached into his drawer for a lighter. He no longer smoked, but the lighter was still useful for other things. Jihoon watched the sheet of paper curl into ashes on his desk while he tried to process the information.

How was it possible that RD-1 didn’t exist anymore? If it had been shut down and ceased operations years ago, who was the man in the white coat from the weapons unveiling party? He had clearly stated that she was with RD-1. Jihoon pressed his fingers against his temples and frowned. It seemed like the Empire had more secrets than anyone could have anticipated. Everywhere Jihoon looked, he found inconsistencies and strange rumours.

But never any solid evidence. Why?

The door to Jihoon’s cabin opened with a bang.

“Sir? Permission to enter, sir?” Captain Kwon demanded, lifting his arm in a salute. His eyes were shining and there was a thin sheen of sweat on his forehead.

“Yes, Captain Kwon?”

“We’ve identified the man who stole the weapons, sir. The problem is… he’s already absconded.”

--------------------------------------------

The men stood stiffly to attention.

“Our culprit is Private Lee Chan of the 7th Squad, sir,” Captain Kwon explained, while Jihoon paced up and down the cramped barracks. The soldiers froze in terror at the sight of the Lieutenant Colonel in their humble sleeping quarters.

One bed was conspicuously messy and unmade.

“How did he escape?” Jihoon demanded.

“He loaded all the firearms into a military transport vehicle and drove it out of Military Base 1 at 6 am this morning. The security personnel suspected nothing because Private Chan often drove military vehicles in his line of duty, sir. We’ve told the gate security forces to keep an eye out if he comes back and hand him over to military police immediately-”

“He’s not coming back.”

Captain Kwon bit his lip. “Sir?”

Jihoon glared at his subordinate officer, making no effort to hide his irritation. “He’s not coming back, Captain Kwon. A Private made off with military-grade firearms that he plans to deliver straight to the rebels in an act of treason and you think he’s going to come back? Why? To face a court-martial and public execution? Don’t be foolish. He'll have gone underground by now.”

Captain Kwon swallowed. “Sorry, sir.”

"And I suppose none of you noticed the blood leaking out of those blankets?"

There was a dark red stain seeping out of the crumpled blankets on Private Lee Chan's bed. Jihoon stepped forward and tugged at it. A bundle of rags absolutely drenched in blood fell onto the floor along with a solid object. It was a small, metal device the size of Jihoon's fingernail.

"He cut his identification tag out of his arm and left it right here," Jihoon hissed. "This took you all morning?"

Captain Kwon only trembled.

Lieutenant Colonel Lee Jihoon took a deep breath and then frowned at the other soldiers standing in the barracks. They were all members of the 7th Squad. Men who had been forced to enlist because of the Empire’s ongoing war. Men who would much rather be anywhere but here. They were young and wet behind the ears, Jihoon observed.

But Private Chan could never have managed something so brave and reckless alone.

There were more.

Jihoon intended to find them.

“How many of you were close to Private Chan?” Jihoon demanded. He looked around at all of the men, but their heads were lowered. They were avoiding eye contact with him. Was it fear? Or defiance? Lieutenant Colonel Lee tried to scan their faces but it was hard to tell the difference.

“Are you going to answer me or do you all want to be handed over to the military police?”

One of the men spoke up. “He-he was friendly with all of us, sir.”

Jihoon narrowed his eyes at the soldier who had spoken. He was of average height but his rounded face and soft features revealed that he was just a boy.

“Your name?”

The boy saluted. “Private Boo Seungkwan, sir.”

“Private Boo. I saw your name on the duty roster. Weren’t you in charge of locking up Storage Unit 7B after firing practice yesterday evening? That means you were the last person to see the stolen firearms before Private Chan got his hands on them.”

Private Boo Seungkwan hesitated. He seemed to regret having spoken. “Y-yes sir. But Private Chan was on security duty at the Storage Units from 11pm to 5 am, sir. I clocked out at 10:59 pm after Private Chan came to relieve me from my post. I haven’t seen him since then, sir.”

“And what did you do afterwards, Private Boo?”

Seungkwan’s steady gaze faltered. “Sir?”

“What did you do after Private Chan relieved you from duty at the Storage Units? Did you come straight back to the barracks for a good night’s rest?” Jihoon asked calmly. He watched as Seungkwan nervously exchanged glances with some of the other soldiers. They seemed to be frowning at him.

“Uh, no sir.”

“You didn’t return to the barracks? What did you do, then?”

“I-I went to watch a film, sir. I returned to the barracks quite late,” Seungkwan admitted.

“And what film was this?”

Boo Seungkwan’s ears turned pink. “Vesta’s new film, sir. The Last Commander. I-I’m a fan of hers.”

“So if I understand the situation,” Lieutenant Colonel Lee Jihoon said slowly and dangerously, “you were the last person to see the firearms intact other than the culprit himself. You were also the only soldier who didn’t return to the barracks in time last night because you went to watch a film.”

Seungkwan swallowed. “Yes, sir.”

“Are you aware that enlisted soldiers aren’t allowed to leave official duty for personal reasons or entertainment, unless granted permission by a Commissioned Officer? Did you have permission to go watch this film last night, Private Boo?”

“No, sir.”

Jihoon had heard enough. He turned to Captain Kwon, who was watching the exchange nervously.

“Well then. We’re done here. The abscondee, Private Chan, is a traitor to the Empire and we have sufficient evidence in the form of his bloody identification tag that somehow nobody here noticed. Captain Kwon, please report the criminal to the military police immediately and have him declared an enemy of the state. They will send out an investigation team to locate him as well as the firearms, so the matter is out of our hands now.”

Captain Kwon nodded. “Yes, sir.”

“As for Private Boo…” Jihoon glanced at the younger soldier. Seungkwan was standing with his fists clenched and sweat beaded on his forehead despite his attempts to look relaxed. “Private Boo will face six months locked up in the disciplinary barracks for taking leave to watch a film without permission.”

Boo Seungkwan blinked. “Sir?”

“Captain Kwon, come see me in my cabin in an hour. The rest of you are dismissed. Go back to training.”

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Captain Kwon had always been punctual, so Jihoon was pleased to hear the young Captain's voice outside his cabin in exactly an hour.

“Sir. Captain Kwon here on your command, sir.”

Lieutenant Colonel Lee looked up calmly. His dark eyes focused on the young man who was saluting him from the doorway of his cabin. For a brief moment, Jihoon doubted himself. One wrong move could jeopardise everything. If Kwon Soonyoung was loyal to the Empire, then Jihoon’s entire career could be at risk.

But Lee Jihoon had reached his position in life and rank in the military by trusting his instincts.

He would simply have to trust them again.

“Enter, Captain Kwon.”

Soonyoung entered the cabin. Despite being a frequent visitor, he was once again momentarily flustered by the enormous statue of the Empire’s emblem. The golden rose was conspicuous. It took Soonyoung a few moments to refocus his soft eyes on the Lieutenant Colonel sitting at the desk in front of it.

“Sir.”

“Before we get down to business, Captain Kwon, do you have anything to say to me about the events of this morning?" Jihoon asked.

Soonyoung paused. The question was loaded. The Lieutenant Colonel did not make small talk; there was almost certainly a right and a wrong answer to this question.

"I should have supervised the Storage Units more closely, sir."

Jihoon did not blink. "Hmm. Anything else?"

“I request you to reconsider the severity of Private Boo's punishment,” Captain Kwon added. He tried to speak confidently, but Jihoon's sharp and piercing gaze was terrifying. “Sir, I think it’s rather excessive. None of the other privates have been sentenced to six months imprisonment in the disciplinary barracks just for watching a film while they were off-duty.”

“Close the door, Captain.”

Soonyoung's lower lip trembled. “Sir?”

“Close the door and take a seat.”

Kwon Soonyoung obeyed. His hands were trembling so he clasped them together tightly in his lap. Jihoon’s dark gaze and unsmiling face did not help his racing heartbeat.

“Do you really think,” Jihoon began slowly and carefully, “that I sentenced Private Boo because he went to watch a film?”

Soonyoung was silent.

“I sentenced him because we both know that he didn’t watch a film last night. He helped Private Chan load sixty firearms from Storage Unit 7B into a military transport vehicle and then aided his escape from Military Base 1 while you watched. You're many things, Captain Kwon, but you're not incompetent. I don't believe that a lowly Private managed to hoodwink you. The only explanation is that they did this with your help."

Soonyoung's face was turning red. "Sir, with all due respect-"

Jihoon cut him off sharply. "You and Private Boo are not the only members from a rebel organisation in my battalion. I know there are others. I’ve been waiting for one of you fools to out yourselves for a while now.”

Captain Kwon's fists clenched. To Jihoon’s satisfaction, the young man did not look scared anymore. A look of steely determination had crossed his childlike face. Kwon Soonyoung was not as innocent as he tried to appear.

“With all due respect, Lieutenant Colonel Lee, you can’t prove any part of what you just said,” Soonyoung said stiffly.

“I have no interest in proving it. Even the suspicion of being affiliated to a rebel organisation is enough to have you court-martialed and executed. But I don’t want to do that, Captain Kwon. You’re not much use to me dead. I have something far more interesting for you to do.”

Soonyoung was silent.

“I see you’re afraid to open your mouth in case you incriminate yourself. That’s all right. I’m not going to interrogate you about your organization. Frankly, I don’t give a flying fuck what the rebels get up to. What I need is someone to spy on Major General Jung. He’s the commander of the Internal Peacekeeping Forces and the second most powerful man in the Empire. I’m sure your people have their eyes on him. Tell me. How much would information about the Major General’s private dealings and conversations be worth to your organisation?”

Soonyoung was silent but his eyes glimmered.

“I’m going to help you and Private Boo get into Major General Jung’s house,” Jihoon continued. “I can also help you communicate whatever information you manage to find to your rebel organization. I only need one thing. Everything you find will be reported to me first.”

Kwon Soonyoung’s hands were shaking. His soft eyes wavered in indecision before he suddenly looked boldly up at the Lieutenant Colonel.

“What’s in it for you?” he demanded.

Jihoon raised an eyebrow. “Excuse me?”

“Why do you want us to do this? Clearly there’s some information that you want from Major General Jung. I need to know what your motivation is.”

“That is irrelevant.”

“I think it’s very relevant. You’re asking me to spy on the commanding officer of the Internal Peacekeeping Forces. If Private Boo and I get caught, then we die. Don’t we deserve to know why we’re putting ourselves at such a huge risk for you? What if you use this against me and my loved ones?”

Jihoon had assumed that Captain Kwon would be naive and easy to manipulate. Evidently that was not the case. The young officer was also brave. Jihoon leaned back in his chair, impressed. Soonyoung could handle entering the lion’s den. Jihoon had stumbled upon the right person for the task.

“Captain Kwon. I’m sure you’re familiar with the Empire’s emblem. The golden rose with thorns. What do you think it means?”

Soonyoung’s eyebrows furrowed. “What?”

“What do you think the emblem with a golden rose and thorns symbolises?”

“Uh…” Soonyoung looked at the enormous statue of the emblem behind the Lieutenant Colonel’s head. It was beautiful but there was no mistaking the thorns that lay underneath it. Soonyoung had never stopped to think about its meaning. “Um. I suppose it means that you should stop and think before you pluck the rose because the thorns will prick you?” he guessed doubtfully.

Jihoon nodded. “Interesting.”

“What does it mean?”

“I don’t know either,” Jihoon admitted. He sighed. “Let me put it this way, Captain Kwon. I’ve lost someone close to me. I need to know whether the Empire’s thorns merely failed to protect him, or whether they pricked him themselves.”

Soonyoung hesitated. He could see the pain behind Lieutenant Colonel Lee’s dark eyes. He had never imagined that such a high-ranking officer whom everyone feared could also be a victim of the Empire.

Then again, perhaps everyone was a victim of the Empire in some way.

Soonyoung took a deep breath. “I’ve lost people to the Empire too. My family back home struggled because of the new laws and all our land was taken away from us-”

Jihoon cut him off quickly. “I don’t care.”

Soonyoung blinked. “Oh.”

“I have no intention of exchanging childhood stories with you, Captain Kwon. I don’t want to be friends. I want information. Let’s talk about how you’re going to get it for me.”

---------------------------------------------------

A vast majority of the Empire's power resided in the hands of two men.

The military took pride in claiming that the Empire wasn’t an autocratic state like the destructive military dictatorships of the past. Instead, it had quickly created the concept of a high command. A pair of men who controlled the military, and as a result, the rest of the Empire.

Major-General Jung, commander of the Internal Peacekeeping Forces.

And Major-General Yang, commander of the Border Forces.

Together, these two men commanded the two primary functional divisions of the army. First, the Internal Peacekeeping Forces were tasked with ensuring the common folk obeyed the Empire's laws, while suppressing occasional violent rebel uprisings and keeping peace within the walls of the Empire.

Second, the Border Forces defended the Borders where the constant looming threat from the Invaders needed to be taken care of. The Borders was where the newly designed weapons and the bravest of soldiers were sent. Fighting at the Borders was no joke.

Every few weeks, fresh bodies were brought back from the Borders in caskets.

“I don’t understand your obsession with the Border Forces, Jihoon,” the Brigadier-General complained as he swallowed a large glass of wine. It was his anniversary party, and he hated talking about official business during celebrations. He wished Jihoon would relax and leave him alone. “Can’t we discuss this on Monday? It’s so dull to be talking about applications and transfers when one should be in a festive mood!”

Jihoon bowed his head. “I apologize, sir-”

“Have a glass of wine, eh? Here!”

“Yes-thank you, sir. I don’t mean to bother you. It’s just... I’ve heard rumours that the Borders are in need of more officers since the threat from the Invaders is steadily rising. The most recent exchange of hostilities at the Border four months ago left our forces crippled-”

The Brigadier-General's grey beard twitched in sympathy. “Ah, yes. Lieutenant Colonel Joshua Hong was one of the brave victims of that devastating attack. Your half-brother, correct? You’ve mentioned him before. My condolences.”

Jihoon clutched his wine. “Thank you, sir.”

“But you should know better than anyone how dangerous it is!” the Brigadier-General cried. “The Borders are treacherous and few return alive. The death toll increases with each passing month. There’s a reason the Empire limits the number of commanding officers we send there. One efficient attack by the Invaders is enough to wipe out entire battalions, and we can’t afford to lose too many at once.”

“I understand, sir, but-”

“We need brave officers like you here and alive, Jihoon. Internal peace and harmony is crucial for the efficiency of this war. The Internal Peacekeeping Forces are doing important work. Wars cannot be won unless the nation is unified from within.”

Jihoon pressed harder. “I’d rather fight at the Borders, sir. I don’t believe the Internal Peacekeeping Forces need me. Rebel uprisings will stop naturally once we can terminate the threat of the Invaders, and return the Empire to its former prosperity and glory.”

The Brigadier-General’s mouth twisted downward. “Do you believe that’s possible?”

“Isn’t it?”

“I don’t know,” the older man admitted grimly. He finished his entire glass of wine in one gulp and then patted Jihoon on the back in a friendly manner. His eyes were slightly unfocused due to the alcohol. “You have a lot of potential, Lieutenant Colonel. You’re a smart young man and I don’t want you to die yet. I’ll submit your application to go to the Borders, but you know the final authority on these matters is Major General Yang. All I can do is send your application onward.”

Jihoon nodded gratefully. At least it was a step in the right direction.

“Thank you, sir.”

“Now, are you done hounding me at my wedding anniversary party? Go get another drink, and find a pretty young lady to dance with! I can introduce you to a few if you’d like…”

Jihoon politely declined. He found a quiet corner to enjoy his glass of wine while the Brigadier-General left to greet his more important guests. The private anniversary party was smaller and humbler than some of the official military galas, but there were still a significant number of high-ranking officers and research officials present. Jihoon wished he was sociable enough to interact with them the way Joshua used to. But that had never been his style. He didn’t have many friends.

Jihoon wondered whether he should stay at the party until Vesta arrived, or leave since he had sufficiently interacted with the host. Jihoon didn’t have anything to say to Vesta. To be frank, he didn’t even enjoy her company. But there was a small and inexplicable comfort in talking to someone who missed Joshua just as much as he did, even if she had her own abrasive ways of handling her grief.

Perhaps it was too risky to keep meeting her.

Jihoon squeezed past the throng of guests and wondered how many more infernal parties and events like this he would have to attend before he found out the truth behind Joshua’s death. What dark secret was concealed in the midst of these studded military coats and sparkling wine glasses? What was so consequential that Lieutenant Colonel Joshua Hong had requested a transfer to the most dangerous, deadly division of the military in order to investigate it?

Jihoon had no idea how to find these answers.

He didn't even know where to look anymore.

Was this the end?

Would he never find out what had taken Joshua from him? Even if Jihoon’s application to transfer to the Border Forces was miraculously accepted, what would he do once he went there? He didn’t know what Joshua had been looking for, and it seemed that the man had confided his secrets in no one.

Yet, it seemed so surreal.

What had Joshua been trying to investigate by himself? Was it even possible that he had single-handedly unearthed some enormous conspiracy? With no outside help? Joshua had been secretive on occasion, yes, but Jihoon still couldn’t believe it. Perhaps Joshua had not told his lover because she had enough worries of her own. And perhaps he had even kept it a secret from his little brother to avoid putting him at risk. But surely he had confided in someone?

Someone?

Out of the corner of his eye, Jihoon saw the flash of a white coat.

It was him again; the same young scientist from the weapons unveiling party. His dark eyes had been watching Jihoon but he averted them the moment he realized he had been caught. Jihoon’s stomach clenched.

He had seen this scientist before. He had seen him multiple times, as a matter of fact, at almost every official celebration that took place in Military Base 1.

Why was this scientist always lingering around him?

The man turned to leave the room and Jihoon made an impulsive decision to follow him. He exited the Brigadier-General’s front hall and followed the man out of the penthouse apartment, and down multiple flights of stairs. The man kept glancing back at Jihoon but he wasn’t trying to get away.

In fact, he seemed to be leading Jihoon somewhere.

Jihoon followed the scientist onto the deserted street. He kept walking until he reached a small, cramped alleyway between two apartment buildings. Jihoon expected him to stop, but he kept going, kept walking and Jihoon began to doubt himself.

What was he doing? Why was he following a strange scientist into places that he didn’t know? There was a service pistol tucked into Jihoon's belt but he doubted that would be of much use if this man was leading him into some kind of a trap.

Finally, the man stopped and turned to face him.

“Lieutenant Colonel Lee Jihoon,” the scientist greeted calmly. His hands were clenched by his sides, and Jihoon could see his fists trembling.

“Who are you?” Jihoon demanded.

“My name is Junhui,” the man explained softly. “I used to be a researcher at Research Division 1. But that’s not important to you. The truth is…. I knew Lieutenant Colonel Joshua Hong. I was the last person to see him alive before he left for the Border.”

Jihoon felt numb.

—------------------------------------------

There was very little in the world that surprised Vesta.

It was late when she arrived at the Brigadier-General’s party, and even later by the time the infuriating old man would allow her to leave. She spent the entire evening smiling until her cheeks hurt and enduring the hungry gazes and wandering hands of the Brigadier-General’s friends.

When she returned to her car and saw Lee Jihoon sitting in the passenger seat, she did not blink an eye.

“I didn’t see you at the party,” she drawled, while lighting her cigarette. Jihoon looked pale. He had always been a handsome young man, but the haunted look Jihoon gave Vesta sent a chill down her spine for completely different reasons.

"Joshua was intercepting confidential documents from Major General Jung's personal office," Jihoon mumbled quietly.

Vesta blinked. It took her a few moments to process exactly what Jihoon was saying. Joshua? Stealing documents from the Major General? But Joshua had always seemed to like the Major General Jung. He had always been eager to gain the commander's admiration and even shared drinks with the older man multiple times after duty. Joshua had always been the one in charge of hauling the Major General's enormous drunken ass back home after parties…

Oh.

So it had all been an act.

Vesta had occasionally wondered why Joshua was so eager to please the Major General, and why he hung around his superior officer despite the older man having the personality of a stinky wet rag…

Maybe she'd assumed that he did it in order to see her.

"What-what documents?" she asked hesitantly. "Did you find any of them? Where were they?"

Jihoon shook his head. "No. Someone told me."

"Someone?"

"This… this man came up to me. Junhui. A research scientist. He said he knew Joshua and that he was the last person to see him alive before he left for the Border," Jihoon explained.

"I've never heard of this name before. Junhui?" she demanded.

Jihoon bit his lip. "Yeah."

"Do you know who he is?"

"I'd never heard his name before today either," Jihoon admitted. His hands were clasped tightly in his lap. "But I had my suspicions, since he's been following me and trying to approach me for a while. He says that Joshua used to have drinks with the Major General and intercept his communications while the man was lying drunk in his office. He says… he says that Joshua made copies and hid some of the communications."

Vesta shook her head. "Hold on. Just stop for a moment. Who is this Junhui and how does he know so much about what Joshua was doing? Has Joshua ever mentioned him to you?"

Jihoon swallowed. "No."

"Joshua told me about you. And you said that he often talked about me. That's how you and I can trust each other. But he never told either of us about this Junhui. How can you trust him? Who the hell is he even?" Vesta demanded.

"He says Joshua saved his life."

Vesta blinked. "What?"

"When high command shut down Research Division 1 a decade ago because their human experimentation failed, they ordered for the subjects and the researchers to be killed. Junhui says Joshua was the military official on duty and saved Junhui's life by helping him escape and hide. He's been lurking around Military Base 1 in hiding and helping Joshua investigate the Empire ever since."

"Why would Joshua do that?"

Jihoon shrugged. "Because he's a good person?'

"It doesn't sound like something that can be explained away that simply. Are you telling me that this man is a fugitive?" Vesta demanded. Her eyes had gone wide in disbelief. "Are you telling me that the entire time we knew Joshua, he was harbouring a fugitive of the Empire? This man can't be sane. Why would Joshua risk everything to help some researcher hide?"

Jihoon's lower lip trembled. "But he knows so much about him."

"Like what?"

"Like everything," Jihoon replied. He took a deep and shaky breath. "Look. I'm confused too. I don't know what Joshua has been up to all these years-"

"Yeah, no shit-"

"But if there's even a hint of truth in what Junhui says, then we might find something. Listen. He says that Joshua used to steal confidential documents from Major General Jung's office. That means Joshua either took those documents or made copies."

"So? You didn't find anything in Joshua's belongings. And you searched his cabin yourself before they cleaned it out."

"Of course. Joshua would never risk getting caught with confidential documents in his possession. There's strict security outside the Major General's office. They check your uniform when you enter and again when you leave the office of any officer in high command. I know, because I went to Major General Jung's office many times to receive medals. They even check the linings of your coat."

"So how did Joshua get the documents out?"

"That's what I've been wondering. What if he didn't? What if he hid them right there in the Major General's office?"

Vesta stared at him.

"That's…"

"Something Joshua would do, right?"

"Yes," Vesta admitted hesitantly. Joshua had been clever at sneaking around and evading suspicion. Despite his seemingly trustworthy appearance, Joshua had been extremely cunning. The number of times he had managed to sneak Vesta into his personal quarters at the dead of night was evidence of his clever thinking. He would constantly come up with new and innovative ways to get her in without anybody noticing.

"We need to find those documents."

"How?"

"How else?" Jihoon asked grimly. There was no choice. "Through the only person on our side who has access to Major General Jung's office. Captain Kwon Soonyoung."

Vesta raised an eyebrow. "The Major-General's new personal security? I've seen him; I wondered if you planted him there. Is he loyal to you?"

Jihoon hesitated. "Not exactly. But he's not loyal to the Empire either. He's an undercover rebel."

Vesta leaned back and laughed. "Well, fuck. You do seem to find these strange people, Jihoon. Do you trust this Captain?"

"I have to. Will you help him?"

Vesta reached into her purse for some cigarettes and fumbled with the lighter before taking a deep breath and nodding.

"You're going to get me killed someday, Lee Jihoon."

-------------------------------------------------

Lieutenant Colonel Lee Jihoon paced the long corridor anxiously.

The Brigadier-General had sent for Jihoon to report to his cabin at once. Considering that the old man preferred to discuss even critically important military matters over alcohol and music, being summoned to the Brigadier-General's office in the middle of the day was highly unusual.

Jihoon wished he could be sure that it was good news.

The door to the office opened.

"Jihoon! Come in!"

Jihoon entered and promptly saluted the Brigadier-General. The senior officer had a much more luxurious and spacious cabin than Jihoon, but even the Brigadier-General could not be rid of the permanent fixture that was the Empire's conspicuous golden rose statue.

It glimmered brightly behind the Brigadier-General's wrinkled face.

"Sir, you called for me."

"I have some news for you, Lieutenant Colonel. It's about your transfer application to the Border Forces," the Brigadier-General began. He pulled out a pair of spindly glasses and squinted at the document on his desk.

Jihoon's heart leapt.

"Yes, sir?"

"It's been denied."

The disappointment on Jihoon's face was unconcealable. The Brigadier-General sighed and lowered his glasses with a frown.

"I'm sorry, Lieutenant Colonel. You should have been a prime candidate. Perhaps that incident with the stolen firearms influenced Major General Yang's decision. You can always re-apply in six months."

A sense of despair was beginning to take over Jihoon, and he didn’t know how to stop it from consuming him.

Was this it? Was this the end of the road?

He had been hoping that he would receive some information from Captain Kwon or Vesta, but they had nothing to report from their espionage of Major General Jung except news about the increasing rebel activity near the coasts. It appeared that either Major-General Jung had nothing to hide, or he was simply too good at hiding it.

And now the Border Forces were shut to him for another six months.

The Brigadier-General seemed sympathetic.

"Never mind the Border Forces, Jihoon. I have a much more important task that I need you to do for me. If you can pull it off, it will certainly erase any black mark on your record from that unfortunate firearms robbery."

Jihoon nodded, although he had lost interest.

"Of course, Brigadier-General."

"What do you know about the rebel uprisings near the coast?"

Jihoon knew plenty; but none of it was from official sources so he had to feign innocence. The coastal regions were the only fertile agricultural lands in the Empire. Combined with the abundance of seafood, they were a primary geographical source of food for the rest of the Empire. If the worst of the rebel uprisings infiltrated the coast, the Empire could be faced with a devastating famine that would impact even Military Base 1.

"Not much, sir."

"The coastal folk have been uncooperative for a while, but the situation is worsening. These are not soldiers; they're farmers and fishermen and they can be controlled. But we have reason to believe they might join forces with some of the more dangerous rebels."

Jihoon nodded. "I suppose the rebels could use the farmers and fishermen as an opportunity to incite some violence."

"I need you to go on a peacekeeping mission to the coastal region."

Jihoon visibly flinched. The last thing he wanted to do was go thousands of miles away from the heart of the military that his half-brother had died investigating, to shush some poor farmers.

"Brigadier-General, I am sure you don't need someone like me to control some farmers and fishermen. I'd really like to re-apply to the Border Forces-"

"You need to wait six months to reapply."

"But surely-"

The Brigadier-General had already turned away from him.

"You leave tomorrow."

----------------------------------------

#seventeen scenarios #woozi scenarios #seventeen angst #woozi x reader #seventeen x reader #woozi angst #seventeen fanfiction #seventeen imagines #dystopian!au

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fantasyescapes17 · 10 months

Text

Closed Doors (Part 3, Final)

Soonyoung had made peace with his station in life. A younger son of a little-known family, he was not set to inherit a fortune and had nothing to recommend him but his bright personality. Nobody expected Soonyoung to make the match of the season. But when you- a woman with ties to the royal family and riches beyond his imagination, a Duchess in your own right- seeks Soonyoung's hand in marriage, his life begins to spiral entirely out of his control.

Genre: Hoshi x female!reader. Regency!AU. Your title is the Duchess of Graham but your first name is not mentioned.

Warnings: Not even remotely historically accurate. Much like Bridgerton, this is all about the aesthetic.

Word Count: 8.1k+

Part 1 Part 2

Series Masterlist [This is not the first installment in this series- it is strongly recommended to visit the Masterlist and read the installments in order as they are all interlinked and the timeline can be confusing.]

You awoke with the morning sun shining brightly in your eyes.

One of the maids had opened the curtains and cracked the window. There was a gentle breeze and you could hear birds chirping; the sounds and fresh smells of the countryside estate were much more pleasing than the smoke and noise of London.

You relaxed instinctively, knowing that you were home. It was warm under the covers and you sleepily sat up in bed and blinked at the maid.

“What time is it?” you asked her.

“It’s a quarter to eight, Your Grace. I thought perhaps you might want to sleep in, but since the Duke was already awake…” she trailed off with a giggle.

The drowsiness cleared and you suddenly remembered where you were. Not in your usual bedchambers, but in the bedchambers of your newly wedded husband, now the Duke of Graham. Your face grew hot as you remembered the events of the previous night. Soonyoung had surprised you many times since your first meeting, but the events of the previous night had perhaps been the most pleasurable surprise of all.

“Do you require anything, Your Grace?” the maid asked you, concerned. “If you are in any pain…”

You wrapped the bedsheets around you tightly and tried not to show your embarrassment.

“No- I… just help me dress, please. Where is the Duke?”

“In the master study downstairs, Your Grace. He has been there all morning.”

“All morning?”

“Yes, Your Grace. He was awake long before most of the servants had arisen.”

You were confused but kept your questions to yourself. You allowed the maid to help you dress and then went downstairs to the master study. This had been your late father’s favourite haunt, and although it was not as large as the grand library upstairs, it was still a luxurious room where your father had conducted most of his business meetings and matters of the estate.

The study door was slightly ajar. You could hear familiar male voices: Soonyoung, Mr. Johnson the estate manager, and one of his assistant bookkeepers.

“There are separate ledgers for the household and for the estate?” Soonyoung was saying in a slightly confused voice. “If I wanted to see a consolidated view of the overall finances-”

Mr. Johnson spoke up. “We reconcile everything on a quarterly basis, Your Grace. Those records are kept here. I would recommend viewing them separately, however, as the household ledgers only track expenses and outgoings and we report them here as a percentage of the gross income.”

Soonyoung sighed. There was a hint of frustration in his voice. “But that gross income is before you’ve provided for taxes?”

“Which taxes, Your Grace? The ones payable to the duchy or the ones payable to the Crown?” the bookkeeper asked patiently.

“Those are separate taxes?”

You knocked gently on the study door and pushed it open. Soonyoung was sitting behind the large mahogany desk, while various ledgers and volumes were open on the table before him. He was startled when he looked up and saw you. His ears promptly turned red and he jumped to his feet.

“Your Grace!”

The bookkeeper and Mr. Johnson also rose to greet you.

“Good morning, gentlemen,” you greeted them with a small smile. “Isn’t it rather early to be going through these tedious ledgers?”

Soonyoung rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. “My apologies, Your Grace. I-I asked for Mr. Johnson to come. I wanted his help to better understand the matters of the estate.”

It was certainly unusual behaviour, but as with everything Soonyoung did, you could see his innocence and good intentions shining through. His eyes were bloodshot. If the maid was to be believed, Soonyoung had been here grappling with the ledgers since half past five in the morning. The new Duke of Graham evidently did not shy away from hard work. You felt a sudden rush of affection for this man, your husband, and his dedication to his new role.

“Perhaps we might adjourn for breakfast?” you suggested lightly.

Soonyoung nodded and hastily closed the ledgers before coming over to you. “Yes, yes, of course.”

“Shall we eat in the gardens?” you asked Soonyoung, who gave you a sudden handsome smile that made your heart skip a beat. You bit your lip and turned to the other gentlemen. “Thank you for coming on the Duke’s request, Mr. Johnson. I will ask the staff to arrange breakfast for you and your assistant in the parlour.”

Mr. Johnson nodded gratefully. “Thank you, Your Grace.”

Soonyoung offered you his arm and you took it before leaning closer to him. It was a strange and thrilling feeling to be so near him. While there was little reason to feel shy after the events of last night, you still enjoyed the subtle contact of your hand resting on his elbow. It was an innocent gesture, but now that Soonyoung was your husband, it felt far more meaningful.

The sight of his soft smile left a strange but pleasant feeling in your stomach.

The servants had set out your breakfast in the garden and Soonyoung blinked, squinting in the bright morning sunlight as you both stepped outdoors. The gardens were large and beautifully maintained with flower beds, water fountains, and artfully shaped hedges.

“This estate is even more beautiful by day,” Soonyoung said honestly.

You bit your lip. “Something you might have discovered sooner if you had not shut yourself in the study on your very first morning here,” you replied.

Soonyoung looked apologetic until he noticed the soft smile on your face. You did not appear angry, so he relaxed.

"I apologise if I worried you, Your Grace."

“I was only surprised. Was going through the estate ledgers so much more exciting than having breakfast with your wife?”

Soonyoung flushed. "No, I only…"

You smiled at him gently. "Yes?"

"As a second son I never took an interest in matters of the estate or business in my own family. Now I find myself the Duke of a duchy with a history and genealogy that goes back hundreds of years…" Soonyoung paused and bit his lip as he looked down at his teacup with a heavy sigh. "I only hope I can be what the title requires me to be."

You felt a sudden burst of affection for the man and you reached across the table to place your hand on top of his.

"Soonyoung."

"Yes?"

"I want you to know that you are not alone. I am genuinely grateful for the effort you are putting in," you told him honestly.

Soonyoung smiled in relief. "Thank you, Your Grace."

"Shall we eat?"

It was a pleasant breakfast in the fresh morning air. Soonyoung seemed in awe of everything; from the breakfast spread to the perfectly maintained flower beds. Soonyoung polished off his meal enthusiastically while telling you about the childhood he spent in the countryside.

"I'm sure our estate wasn't even a quarter of this size," he admitted. "I don't remember much about it. I was sent off to boarding school and then the Royal Naval Academy fairly young, and I spent my summer breaks in London."

You blinked at him. "But the Viscount said he first met you in Oxford?"

He coughed, looking rather embarrassed. "Yes- I attended Oxford for about a year. It was fun; I made friends but I was bottom of the class and it was quite evident by the end of the first year that I was not about to become a barrister or a doctor. I thought I had best cut my losses, and transfer to the Royal Naval Academy."

"Were you drawn to the navy by a sense of adventure?" you asked with a smile.

Soonyoung chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck. "A boyish sense of adventure? I suppose so. I was certainly more motivated by the thought of defeating enemy warships than being called to the bar. I wanted to do something exciting, so I will not pretend that I was pleased to learn sailors are more likely to die from scurvy or drowning than at the edge of an enemy combatant's sword."

"Is there much sword-fighting in the Navy?"

He grinned at you sheepishly. "There was plenty in my fantasies."

You could not help but smile back at him. "It seems I must apologise, then, for depriving the Crown of a potentially heroic naval captain to defend our stormy seas."

"Considering the number of times I had to retake the lesson on using a sextant to navigate at sea, I am sure the Crown is quite grateful to you for keeping me on solid land, Your Grace," Soonyoung replied humbly.

"Oh- I have always wanted to learn how to use a sextant," you said brightly. "It's a funny little contraption, is it not?"

Soonyoung chuckled as he sipped his tea. "Fiddly little things and awful to use. I was horrified when I went to the academy and learned that ships did not just sail blindly into the vast unknown, and marine navigation involved an overwhelming amount of mathematics and nautical charting," he admitted.

"You expected more sword fighting?"

"I expected less calculating."

"Well," you said with a smile as you sipped your tea, "I am sorry that you are forced to do some calculating here. I noticed that you were going through the ledgers this morning. What prompted you to rise at daybreak on your first day and undertake that particularly painful task?"

Soonyoung blushed. "You will laugh if I tell you."

"Only if you say something funny."

“I- I woke at dawn and I could not sleep,” he admitted. His ears were slightly red. “I went out for a drink of water, but I wandered down the wrong hallway and found myself in what I now understand to be the ancestral gallery? It was a long hallway filled with portraits of your ancestors who all stared down at me disapprovingly from the walls. It struck me that I was responsible for continuing their legacy, and I did not relish the idea of having to face them if I hadn’t done everything in my power to uphold the glory of their duchy. I became quite anxious, so once I had escaped the gallery, I asked to meet the estate manager immediately.”

The corner of your lips twitched noticeably.

Soonyoung pouted at you. “You promised that you would not laugh, Your Grace!”

“I promised no such thing,” you replied, but you could not help but let out a giggle at the thought of the poor Duke wandering around the manor at dawn. “But I will not laugh at you. I will only make one observation.”

“That is?”

“Many of these ancestors you saw in the portrait gallery were drunkards, gamblers, and adulterers. I assure you that there is nothing particularly grand or glorious about most of them. They were simply rich men. I do not think you shall find it incredibly difficult to outshine them, Your Grace,” you told him. “Honestly- the only prerequisite to be added to that gallery is to stay alive long enough to produce an heir that will put up your portrait once you are gone.”

Soonyoung almost choked on his tea. “Yes- an heir, of course.”

You bit your lip and avoided his gaze. “There is… no particular urgency on that front.”

“Right.”

“Shall we take a tour of the manor, then, to prevent Your Grace from losing your way and encountering more anxiety-inducing portraits?”

Soonyoung smiled. “Yes, let’s.”

Over the course of your first day as Soonyoung's wife, you were surprised by how pleasurable you found his company. Soonyoung was not suave or charming in the style of men like Viscount Hong, nor did he possess the bold confidence or pride that were often considered desirable among the male sex.

No. Soonyoung was different. He was kind, he was honest, and he was humble. You had never met a man quite like him. You had never met a man that you wanted, more than anything in the world, to love and trust with all your heart.

It was a long day but time spent with Soonyoung went by in a flash. You showed him around the manor, the gardens and the creek and told him about your family and childhood and the estate. Soonyoung listened to you intently. He hung onto your every word and although you had always been a quiet and reserved person, you found yourself speaking more than you usually did, opening up to him, and even laughing.

Your maid, Rosie, noticed the lingering smile on your face as she helped you dress for bed later that night.

"If I may say something, Your Grace…" Rosie began shyly as she combed through your hair.

You blinked up at her in the mirror. "Yes?"

"We were all quite worried, Your Grace, when we heard that you had married in London so suddenly- and to a man with no fortune, even Mr Johnson thought perhaps Your Grace was being taken advantage of…"

You looked up at her defensively. "I may be a woman but I am not an idiot, Rosie."

Rosie flushed. "Of course not, Your Grace! I see that now… I think we all understand why you married the Duke."

"Oh? And why is that?"

"Well… pardon me, Your Grace, but you haven't been yourself since the late Duke passed. You've become so quiet and withdrawn and we were rather worried. But since yesterday… well, old Mrs. Minnie in the gardens was saying that she couldn't remember the last time she saw you smiling so brightly."

You pursued your lips in embarrassment. Was it so obvious, even to the servants? You had always been careful not to reveal your true feelings too much, to mask your emotions behind a practised smile. But if even the servants could see that Soonyoung had such an effect on you…

The thought was strangely both comforting and scary.

There was a knock on your door. One of the servants opened the door and poked her head in. She seemed to be stifling a smile.

"Your Grace? The Duke is here for you. We found him wandering the upstairs hallways."

"Of course, please let him in. Are you done, Rosie?"

Rosie released your hair with a smile. "Of course, Your Grace. Good night."

The servants left while hiding their giggles, and Soonyoung entered your room with flushed cheeks. He was holding a bottle of wine- the same bottle, you realised, that you had brought to his room the previous night and left unfinished. He glanced awkwardly at the door that the servants exited from.

"That is the second time one of the servants caught me lost in the manor," he said, embarrassed. "I think they are all laughing at me. I had forgotten where your bedchambers were."

You smiled at him. "Shall I draw you a map?"

"I would probably lose the map as well," Soonyoung joked. He stepped closer to you and revealed the bottle in his hand. "Can I tempt you with a glass of wine before bed? We never finished this one last night."

You nodded. "Of course."

It was a strange sort of intimacy; comfortable and yet still exciting, to crawl under the covers with Soonyoung as he poured you a glass of wine. He lit a cigar with your permission. You ordinarily disliked the smell of tobacco, but oddly, you did not mind anything much when you were with Soonyoung.

Sipping the wine, you patiently answered his questions about the estate and the dukedom. You had been handling most of the important matters yourself for many months now; particularly since your father's illness had him bedridden.

"It must have been very difficult," Soonyoung said gently, "taking care of the estate while you were worried about your father's health."

You looked down at his fingers entwined with yours and sighed. His touch was warm and comforting.

"It was not easy," you confessed. "I lost my mother very young and my father was all I had. I was never a very social person. Without a mother or a sister to chaperone me I… I never even spent much time in society or at balls."

Soonyoung was quiet, but you could tell that he was listening.

"I had always felt alone, but it wasn't until my father passed that I realised how alone I really was," you continued. "He had wanted me to marry before he died but his health became worse suddenly…"

Soonyoung squeezed your hand.

"I'm sorry," he whispered.

You bit your lip. You had never spoken to anyone about this before and it felt almost cathartic to confess it all to Soonyoung.

"The day after my father died, all the vultures descended."

"Vultures?" Soonyoung asked, confused.

"One of my father's oldest friends- a nobleman more than twice my age- proposed marriage to me before my father had even been properly buried. When I refused him, he was furious. Another came to the funeral and told me that as a lady I couldn't possibly manage the duchy and that if I signed it over to him, he would take care of it for me and give me an allowance."

Soonyoung stared at you in disbelief.

"Monsters," he mumbled.

Your lower lip trembled. "There were more offers… some cruder than others. I began to realise that as long as I remained unmarried, I would continue to have a painted target on my forehead. But I had nobody to trust. That was when I finally reached out to Viscount Hong."

Soonyoung blinked. "But he is happily married."

You nodded. "That made it easier to trust him. I knew the Viscount from my youth, of course, but plenty of people that I knew from my youth had since revealed themselves to be untrustworthy. Viscount Hong was the only person who did not want anything from me and genuinely treated me as a friend. That is why I could confide in him. I sought his help to find a husband."

Soonyoung finished his glass of wine and then turned to look at you- his gaze was a little unfocused and you realised that he had drunk too much of the wine. The bottle lay empty on the bedside table.

"Wouldn't you rather have married him instead?"

Your eyes widened. "Soonyoung!"

His lower lip stuck out, almost in a pout as he leaned his head against one of the pillows lazily. His tone was contemplative. "It's hardly outrageous. Viscount Hong is rich, handsome, very charming…"

"And as you pointed out yourself, quite happily married," you protested.

"But you must have considered it?"

You blinked down at your husband. He did not seem angry; his eyelids seemed heavy but he forced them open to look up at you. It was genuine curiosity in his eyes and you felt obligated to answer him with honesty.

You sighed. "I will admit that I considered Viscount Hong quite handsome when we were younger- although I dare you to find a young lady in the ton, married or single, who did not feel the same way about him at some point. He is quite attractive but no, I do not think I ever seriously considered marrying him."

"Why not?"

"I am not sure we would have suited each other."

"But you thought I suited you?"

You looked down at Soonyoung. His cheek was pressed against the pillow and his face was flushed. It had been a long day; he was clearly struggling to stay awake and his voice was beginning to sound slurred.

"I did," you replied quietly.

"Why-why did you marry me?" he mumbled.

You took a deep breath. Frankly, you were surprised that Soonyoung had not asked you this question much, much sooner. It had quite clearly been on his mind. Stranger yet was that you dreaded being asked this question- it forced you to confront feelings that you were not sure you were ready to face.

"I-"

There was a soft snore from the pillow. You looked down in surprise- Soonyoung had fallen asleep. His mouth was still slightly open and his face flushed. You giggled and leaned down to kiss his soft cheek.

"Good night, Your Grace."

—----------------------------------------------

The first few weeks of your 'honeymoon period', as many called it, with Soonyoung were perhaps some of the happiest days you had ever spent. The Graham manor (a place that had never been a source of much happiness for you, and had become a source of misery since your father's death) was suddenly lit up by Soonyoung's mere presence.

He resolved to learn about the estate. You discovered that, despite his seeming lack of confidence, Kwon Soonyoung could do anything if he set his mind to it. There was a steely determination that seemed to overtake him when it came to matters of the estate and dukedom.

Even Mr. Johnson, the stiff and difficult-to-please estate manager, admitted to you that he was impressed with the way Soonyoung had taken charge of the dukedom.

"His Grace insisted upon meeting the peasants himself," Mr. Johnson told you in confidence. "I assumed it was a vanity trip; some of the noblemen like to lord their wealth before the commoners. But His Grace actually walked through the fields instead of taking his carriage and spoke to each of the peasants individually to understand their troubles."

You blinked in surprise. "Did my father ever do that?"

Mr. Johnson chuckled. "No. The late Duke would make the peasants travel up to the manor if they had complaints and to submit their taxes. It took them all day- and meant that they couldn't tend to the fields."

"This way is better, then."

"Personally, I think some distance between the common folk and nobility should be maintained," Mr. Johnson said stiffly. "Yet I cannot find it in me to fault His Grace's methods. The other day, he resolved a land dispute that some of the peasants have been having for years… I wish I had been there to see it, but I was not at the site. It seems he convinced them to come to a mutual settlement."

You blinked. "How?"

"I wish I knew. He mediated it himself- they have come to accept His Grace's authority even in such a short time."

You were surprised as well. As the Duchess, you were hardly disliked but it had been ingrained in you from a young age to keep your distance from the peasants and be and be wary of everyone and everything.

You were respected- but Soonyoung was beloved. He had such an amiable nature that in a matter of months, almost everyone in the duchy had fallen in love with him.

You were no exception.

From the peasants, to the villagers, to the servants at the manor… everyone agreed that the new Duke of Graham was nothing short of a bright ray of sunshine.

Soonyoung's dedication to his new role as Duke did not mean that he was any less dedicated to his role as a husband. He spent his evenings solely with you. You shared long walks in the gardens and often indulged in some wine before bed. Separate bed-chambers were not uncommon among married couples of the nobility, but you and Soonyoung had never felt the need for them.

"We shall have to return to London soon," you told him one morning over breakfast as you both perused the post. "Her Majesty has specifically asked me to join her court now that I am married, and you will need to take your place in court among the other Dukes as well…"

Soonyoung blinked at you in surprise. "Has the Queen really written to you personally?"

You bit your lip. "She has always taken a personal interest in me. My mother was quite close to the Queen; she would not have issued the decree which allowed me to keep the title otherwise. I cannot risk offending Her Majesty."

Soonyoung nodded. "Then we shall return as Her Majesty commands."

You suddenly felt anxious. "Maybe it was foolish of me, but I did not invite many Dukes and Earls to our wedding. At least not the vultures. They are certainly upset at my decision not to marry any of them, and I am worried they may be unpleasant upon our return-"

Soonyoung reached across the table and placed his hand on yours gently.

"It will be fine. We will handle it together."

You smiled at him gratefully. "Thank you, Soonyoung."

"When do we leave?"

"In two days."

—----------------------------------------------------

You were miserable as the carriage approached your London manor and you felt the familiar thickness of the city air.

The court, the ton, and the intricate politics and pettiness of elite society had never been to your taste. You were by no means bad at it. Putting on a fake smile and pandering to society was a skill you had mastered early on in life, but it gave you almost no pleasure.

You would have stayed at the estate with Soonyoung forever, if only it was possible.

"Your Grace!" the butler greeted you politely as you stepped into the familiar luxurious manor and the servants rushed to carry your belongings inside. You turned- but the butler was addressing your husband. "There are a number of letters here for you."

Soonyoung took them and frowned as he rifled.

"Letters already?" you wondered.

"I wrote ahead to some of my friends that I was returning to London," Soonyoung admitted shyly. "Mr. Kim wishes to know when I will come by the gentleman's club for a game of cards. Viscount and Viscountess Hong have invited us to a dinner party on Saturday. And this is from… who is the Duke of Kent?"

You winced. "A disgusting old fellow."

"He invites me to join him on a hunting trip tomorrow with some other gentlemen," Soonyoung replied. He looked at you sheepishly. "I… am not particularly good at hunting."

You waved a hand dismissively. "Neither is the Duke of Kent."

"I suppose I should accept his invitation then. Perhaps Mr. Yoon will give me some tips about using a shotgun beforehand…" Soonyoung muttered thoughtfully, as he walked away to find an ink and pen to answer the invitations.

You felt a strange anxiety in the pit of your stomach.

"Soonyoung…"

He paused. "Yes, dear?"

"I know I have said this before, but some of these Dukes can be very unpleasant and manipulative, and I…" you trailed off, not sure how to explain yourself.

You were worried for him. You were worried at the thought of your kind, caring husband alone with those manipulative noblemen who had decades of experience in the art of politics and under-handedness. Soonyoung's expression softened as he came back to you and leaned down to place a soft kiss on your forehead.

"Do not worry, Your Grace," he said gently.

"I will not be able to join you hunting, I am required to meet with the Queen tomorrow," you reminded him.

"As you must."

Soonyoung seemed more confident. Perhaps his success at managing the duchy and popularity with the peasants had left him feeling more comfortable about his position as a Duke. Yet, you could not help but feel that your husband was about to be thrown in the lion's den unprepared.

You had supper together before going to bed. As was common, the enormous London manor had separate bedrooms for the Duke and Duchess but Soonyoung always found his way to your bedroom after dark. On your first night in London, he arrived much later than usual, after you had already settled under the covers.

"I got lost," Soonyoung mumbled to you in apology as he blew out your candle and slid under the covers beside you. His arm wrapped around your waist as you giggled.

"Lost, again?"

He huffed, pressing his cheek to your shoulder. "This is my first night at the London manor. It took me over a month to find my way around the manor at the estate. Now I must acquaint myself with a completely new building full of winding corridors."

You giggled. "I'll have the butler draw you a map in the morning. Good night, Your Grace."

"Good night."

—-----------------------------------------------------------

Soonyoung left for his hunting trip at dawn and you had to leave soon afterwards for your engagement with the Queen. Her Majesty received you warmly in her tea parlour with some of the other ladies-in-waiting, and her sharp eyes scanned you as soon as you had taken your seat.

"You look different, Duchess," the Queen told you bluntly.

You bowed politely. "Do I, Your Majesty?"

"Yes. Marriage suits you. I can't be the first person to have told you this. I have seen excellent young ladies destroyed by entering into the wrong marriage, and it pleases me to see that this does not seem to be the case with you. Tell me; are you happy?"

You bit your lip and nodded. "I am, Your Majesty."

"We could have found you a Prince, you know."

You smiled at her graciously. "I am very grateful, Your Majesty. But I have a responsibility to my dukedom and my title- I could not abandon my family heritage to become a Princess."

The Queen nodded and sipped her tea. One of the other court ladies- the Countess Harrison- took the opportunity to speak.

"Our dear Duchess is, as always, thinking about responsibilities that are not hers to bear," the Countess Harrison said with a titter. "Perhaps it is time you left your dukedom to the men and learned something from the other ladies about womanly responsibilities."

You sighed. You had long learned to pick your battles carefully with the court ladies.

"And what are these womanly responsibilities, Countess?" you wondered.

The Countess giggled. "Why, of course; bearing sons to continue the noble bloodline! Surely your family will not petition Her Majesty again to allow you to pass the title onto someone else, simply because you did not bear enough sons?"

"Enough sons?" you asked. You were not taking her conversation seriously at all- frankly, you were more interested in the lemon cakes being served than anything the Countess had to say.

"But of course! You must have enough sons. Children sometimes die prematurely, it is an unfortunate reality."

You stirred some sugar into your tea. "So fear of your children dying is the reason your husband has sired so many bastards? If little Jonathan should die of fever, then at least your maid's bastard son can take over the Earldom. The continuation of the noble Harrison bloodline may depend upon it," you remarked coolly.

The Countess flushed a furious shade of red. Some of the other court ladies giggled. They were no friends of yours, but they also did not have much loyalty to each other.

The Queen looked at you with a friendly twinkle in her eye.

"Now, now, Duchess. We are all delighted to see you happily married, but you must not be so mean to our Countess here," the Queen said lightly. Her tone was playful.

"My apologies, Your Majesty," you said half-heartedly.

The Queen rose. "I wish to step outside onto the balcony. Accompany me, Duchess."

It was a statement and one that silenced the other court ladies immediately. The Queen had never been shy about the fact that you were her favourite court lady. Your mother had been her close personal friend, and despite their best efforts, none of the other court ladies had been able to wriggle their way into the Queen's good books quite like your family.

You offered your arm to the Queen, who led you outside to the balcony and called for her snuffbox. Then she turned to you with a raised eyebrow.

"Do you remember what I told you when you arrived in London a few months ago- after your father's death?" the Queen asked.

You bit your lip. "Of course, Your Majesty. You told me that as a Duchess, nothing could come before my duty to the title and my dukedom, and that I would have to make my decisions carefully."

The Queen nodded. "Do you think it was sound advice?"

"I do, Your Majesty."

"Have you followed it?"

You hesitated and the Queen's sharp eyes did not miss the look on your face. She glanced back at the parlour where the court ladies were still having tea and then raised an eyebrow at you.

"I-I have tried, Your Majesty," you replied.

"Then you should have no problem telling me why you chose to put your entire family's legacy in the hands of a poor second son without a penny to his name."

You swallowed.

"Well?" the Queen asked. "Can you?"

"... I cannot."

—-------------------------------------------------------

You were drained of energy by the time you returned to the manor. The butler informed you that your husband had still not returned from his hunting trip, and that he had sent word for you to have supper without him.

You ate and went to bed but somehow, you could not sleep alone. You had become too used to Soonyoung's warm body against yours. He always tucked you in close to him with an arm around you and his soft and steady breathing was what helped you sleep. Without him, the room was too silent.

You waited for Soonyoung to return, but the clock struck midnight and he was still not back. You wrapped a robe around yourself and went downstairs.

The butler ran to you."Do you require anything, Your Grace-"

"Had the Duke still not returned from the hunting trip?" you demanded.

The butler looked confused.

"His Grace returned a few hours ago. He was tired and went straight to his bedchambers."

You blinked and nodded before dismissing the butler. Perhaps Soonyoung was too tired to risk getting lost in the manor in search of your room, and had gone to sleep in his own bedchambers. You went back upstairs and hurried to the bedchamber that you knew to be your husband’s.

You knocked on the door. "Soonyoung?"

There was no response. You turned the handle.

It was locked.

An unsettling feeling came across you. You could not think of why Soonyoung would lock the door to his bedchamber. You often had to remind him even to just close the door- he had a careless habit of leaving doors completely ajar.

There were footsteps on the stairs. Some of the servants were awake, and you decided to return to your own bedchambers instead of causing a scene.

—----------------------------------------------------

You awoke to find Soonyoung had already left the manor. The butler informed you that the Duke had gone to visit his friends Mr. Kim Mingyu and Mr. Lee Seokmin, and would be back in time to accompany you to the dinner party at Viscount Hong's.

You tried not to read too much into it. Soonyoung had lived in London for a long time, and his friends were undoubtedly eager to meet him upon his return.

You wondered if you would have had an easier time making friends if it had not been for your title.

You kept yourself occupied for most of the day with your correspondence and answering invitations that flooded in from members of the ton who had learned you were back in London. The social season was drawing to a close and there were plenty of balls and events crammed into the next week. You could not possibly attend them all, nor did you wish to.

Soonyoung finally returned in the evening. The carriage waited outside to take you both to the Viscount's home, and you smiled in relief at the sight of your husband.

"Soonyoung!" you greeted him warmly. "I did not see you last night. How did the hunting trip go?"

Soonyoung grimaced as he helped you into the carriage. "I couldn't shoot anything," he told you honestly. "But neither did the Duke of Kent so at least I was not the worst hunter there. The Viscount shot a rather plump pheasant."

"Viscount Hong was there?"

"Yes, thankfully," Soonyoung muttered. You eyed your husband anxiously as the carriage took off. He was quiet, but it was not entirely unusual for Soonyoung to sometimes be more quiet and withdrawn. He often did it when he was focusing, or thinking deeply about something.

"Did you enjoy your morning with Mr. Kim and Mr. Lee?" you asked lightly.

Soonyoung nodded. "Oh-yes."

"What did you do?"

"We only played cards and talked about how they've been during the last few months. I didn't bet much money on the cards," he added quickly.

You blinked, confused. "I am not worried about you gambling, Soonyoung."

He flushed. "Yes- of course."

The carriage arrived at the Viscount's grand manor and you both descended. Soonyoung offered you his arm and you took it.

The Viscount and Viscountess were waiting to greet you at the entrance. Viscount Hong smiled, while his wife embraced you and congratulated you and Soonyoung warmly on your marriage. They guided you to the drawing room where about ten or eleven other guests were already gathered. You saw the Earl Harrison, the Duke of Kent and some of the other unpleasant old noblemen along with their wives.

"Perhaps we should have looked more closely at the guest list before accepting this particular invitation," you mumbled to your husband. Soonyoung did not smile or agree with you. His expression was grim and he seemed uncomfortable. .

"Ah; the new Duke and Duchess of Graham!" the Earl Harrison greeted you loudly. You forced a smile. He was a disgusting man with a reputation for sleeping with his servants, and you had no respect for him.

"Earl Harrison," you replied politely.

"We had the pleasure of hunting with your husband just yesterday. Rather unfortunate that you did not enquire whether he could handle a shotgun before you married him!"

You felt Soonyoung stiffen beside you and gave the Earl a sharp look.

"I did not consider proficiency with a shotgun to be one of my primary requirements in a husband, sir," you replied coolly.

The Earl raised an eyebrow. "Indeed? Well, it leaves one to wonder…"

"Wonder what, exactly?" you demanded.

"Why you married him, of course."

You felt a burst of irritation. You were normally much better at controlling your anger and keeping calm, but the Earl's snide remarks about Soonyoung wound you up more than they should have. Your jaw clenched but before you could respond, the Viscount and Viscountess inserted themselves into the conversation.

"Earl Harrison!" the Viscountess said with a kind smile. "You must allow the Viscount to show you his new hunting rifles in the gallery. Perhaps you would be interested as well, Your Grace?"

You were furious but the Viscountess was the master of smoothing things over. She quickly ushered the gentlemen into the gallery to look at the rifles, and then took your arm and pulled you aside.

"Are you all right?" the Viscountess asked you gently.

You nodded. "Thank you."

She sighed. "I am afraid Earl Harrison forcefully wrested an invitation to tonight's dinner from Joshua yesterday. I did not want to invite him at all, especially after I heard what he was saying about you and the Duke during the hunting trip."

You stiffened. "What has he been saying about myself and the Duke?"

The Viscountess looked upset. "Nothing of any substance, only some nasty remarks about why you might have married the Duke. It's all baseless, really, everyone knows that-"

"Has he been saying these things in front of the Duke?"

The Viscountess bit her lip. "I do not know."

"I want to know what he is saying."

She sighed. "I am really not sure that you do…"

The Viscountess was a lovely woman, and the last thing you wanted was to create a scene in her home. But you were angry; you needed to know what this foolish Earl was running his mouth about. You had tolerated his insults long enough, and you would not allow him to insult your husband as well.

You went into the gallery where a number of gentlemen were gathered looking at the Viscount's new hunting rifles. Earl Harrison was standing a short distance away and talking to the Duke of Kent. He made no attempt to even lower his voice.

"-women have too much power these days, I tell you. Outrageous that the Duchess should have been given a title at all. That calculating wench knew that if she married one of us, she would be put in her rightful place immediately. So what does she do? Marries a poor man without connections or a fortune so that she can control him like a puppet!"

The Duke of Kent laughed. "Naturally, naturally. She wanted a young man she could keep under her thumb. The poor Duke does not realise she is emasculating him entirely. Pathetic excuse for a man."

You saw red.

How dare they? How dare these disgusting men stand there and say these vile things about you and your husband in public? Had they said similar things within earshot of Soonyoung?The thought made your blood boil

"Would you like to repeat that so that I can be sure what you are saying?" you demanded loudly.

The room fell silent. All conversation ceased.

Soonyoung and the Viscount Hong were standing a few feet away, and you saw your husband watching you with wide eyes.

"W-what?" Earl Harrison sputtered.

"I asked if you would like to repeat yourself," you said coldly. "Surely I must have misheard you. Surely you could not have been standing here and openly insulting the Duke and Duchess of Graham, who outrank you in every possible way. That would be a very foolish thing to do, don't you agree?"

The Duke of Kent smiled abominably. "My dear Duchess, you must not go into hysterics-"

"Then perhaps your and the Earl should avoid giving me reason to go into hysterics, Your Grace. Or have you forgotten who is the Queen's close confidante? Who receives letters and invitations to tea from Her Majesty personally? Allow me to refresh your memory, Earl Harrison. It is certainly not you or your stupid wife."

The Earl paled. "I have never had a woman dare to speak to me this way-'

"You do not want to make an enemy of me, Earl Harrison. I will not waste my time with backhanded gossip and failed petitions to the Crown. One word from me can persuade Her Majesty to strip you of your entire title and estate in a heartbeat. I will undo your generations-long lineage in an instant. Do not test me."

The Duke of Kent frowned. "That is quite enough!"

"I agree," you replied sharply. "I have had quite enough. My husband is a hundred times the man you will ever be, and the next time you worry about anyone being emasculated, you would do well to remember that a woman is in charge of the Crown and your life."

Soonyoung was staring at you with wide eyes, as you walked over to him and took his arm.

"We are leaving," you said firmly. The rest of the room watched in stunned silence. "I apologise for the intrusion, Viscount and Viscountess Hong. Thank you for your hospitality."

You took your husband's arm and walked out.

—----------------------------------------------

Soonyoung said nothing in the carriage ride home.

You could not speak either; the adrenaline was still pumping in your veins. You had never addressed anyone in that manner, much less an Earl and a Duke. They had said worse things about you in the past, you were sure, and it had not made you angry. But the idea of them saying these things about Soonyoung made your blood boil.

"Perhaps we should go to bed early," Soonyoung mumbled as he left straight for his bedchambers. You had never seen him look so tired and withdrawn.

You followed him upstairs to his bedchamber and called out to him just as he was about to slip inside and close the door behind him.

"Soonyoung, wait."

"I'm tired-"

"Please don't close the door."

There was a long pause and he finally opened the door again, allowing you inside. You took a deep breath and entered, sitting on the edge of his bed as you thought about what to say to him. Soonyoung stood patiently near the door and watched you for a long moment before finally speaking.

"It's all right," he said quietly. "You don't need to worry, Your Grace."

You blinked at him. "What?"

"I knew this was a marriage of convenience. You were always honest with me. I would be a fool if I resented you for it just because some Earl said it aloud. I knew perfectly well what this marriage was when I agreed to it."

Your heart dropped.

"Soonyoung, no-"

"I know you were in a difficult position, and you needed to marry someone who would not dare to exercise power over you or the dukedom. It is a rational decision to make."

Your throat felt tight.

"Don't call it that-"

"I am saying it is perfectly understandable and rational-"

"But it's not!" you cried. You rose and stood in front of him, grabbing his cold hands. For some reason you suddenly, desperately needed Soonyoung to understand what you were telling him. "Rational? Choosing you was not a rational decision, Soonyoung. Far from it; it was possibly the least rational thing I have ever done in my life."

Soonyoung's hands were limp in yours but his dark eyes flashed.

"What do you mean?" he asked.

You took a deep breath and looked up at your husband. You had not expected to open up to him, or to reveal your vulnerabilities to him tonight, but it was now or never.

"It was an impulse, pure impulse. I was so tired of always doing the right thing, the expected thing. If I was being rational then I would have married a Baron or a Lord. Heaven knows there are plenty of them to be had."

Soonyoung was quiet. "Why didn't you?'

"The night we met- at the ball when we danced- I know it was only a few moments but you made me smile. I felt happy with you. For the first time in my life, I felt something that wasn’t just duty or obligation or responsibility. I felt like this nightmare of a life might be bearable if I could share it with someone like you," you confessed quietly.

Soonyoung's expression had softened and his dark eyes looked down at you with a sudden gentleness and vulnerability.

"But we hardly knew each other-"

"Which is why it wasn't a rational or calculated decision. The decision to marry you wasn't made for the good of the dukedom or the title. I made it for the most selfish of reasons- my own happiness. It was worse than irrational. It was a rebellion against everything my father expected from me."

Soonyoung's lower lip trembled. "You must have regretted it, then."

"I thought I might," you admitted shakily. "For the first few weeks after I proposed to you, I was terrified that I was making a mistake. But Soonyoung… you never gave me a single chance to regret it. At every turn, you only showed me, over and over again, that I made the right choice."

"Do you mean that?"

You lifted your hand to cup his cheek.

"I love you," you told him firmly and honestly.

Soonyoung kissed you. It was a soft, gentle, loving kiss and you wrapped your arms around his neck as he pulled you into his warm embrace. You gasped against his lips and he slowly pulled back and pressed his forehead against yours.

"I love you too," he whispered.

Your heart swelled with happiness. "Do you mean it?" you asked him softly. "Just moments ago, you were calling this a marriage of convenience-"

Soonyoung's lips curved into a smile as he cupped your cheeks.

"Because I thought you felt that way. How could I not love you? You are a divine angel that came into my life. Some days I wake up and look at you beside me and think that I must be in some kind of dream, because I don't know what I did to deserve your love and trust."

Your lower lip trembled. "That's not true-"

"It is. I love you."

You wrapped your arms around his neck tightly and buried your face into his shoulders. Soonyoung embraced you and you breathed in your husband's warm, familiar scent.

"Then don't ever close that door again."”

"I won't," he promised. "I won't."

—------------------------------------------------------

#reblog

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