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I KNOW WE DON’T TALK MUCH THESE DAYS BUT I WANTED YOU TO GET THE NEWS ESPECIALLY SINCE YOU WERE REALLY SUPPORTIVE WHEN THINGS WEREN’T SO GREAT BUT LOOK HOW FAR ME AND MY PARTNER HAVE COME THIS HAPPENED TONIGHT YOU EVER GET SO EXCITED YOU FORGET WHERE THE CAPLOCKS BUTTON IS ‘CAUSE BOY HOWDY I SURE HAVE AAAAAAHHH

That’s phenomenal, Zephra human! Time’s not always especially kind (as the half-melted bots I’ve been tied up in treating this glorious fire season can attest to), but it’s a delight to see how far you’ve come, and to know that such fantastic news is yours to deliver.

Breakdown and Impact send their congratulations to you both, and we all agree that if we were in the vicinity of your ring, we would resist the urge to eat it.

#zephra85 #submissions

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Have you survived the onslaught of the Superb Owl for another year?

No, it carried me off in its talons and I'm currently a pile of regurgitated scrap metal and vole bones at the base of the Superb Tree. Tell my tale to those who ask, but only the good bits.

#Anonymous #asks #owl nonsense

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I know this is going to sound extremely weird, but I felt like you ought to know. I've been a fan of yours (on this blog) for... a while. Like close to ten years. When I had to pick a language to learn in high school, I picked German because you made it sound cool, and it turned out I liked it, and... long story short, my college degree in German Language Studies came through today. I never would have tried studying German without you, and between actually learning the language and being able to travel to Germany it's done a lot for me, and I just wanted to say thanks.

Yes, I find I have that effect on most things I say! The passage of time and what it means for humans is one of those things that will keep me up if I allow it to linger, so suffice it to say, this is one of those updates I'll just be tucking away to keep. Ich gratuliere Ihnen zu Ihrem Abschluss und wünsche Ihnen noch viele schöne Reisen!

#Anonymous

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Christmas Eve Eve Stream

Match sticks, phallic Santas, and aliens that made everything I did to your planet fine by comparison.

#stream chats

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And off we go.

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The 1989 Nissan S-Cargo!

What say you, cute or cursed?(and is the name being a pun a point in either direction?)

Puns are always a point of favor, but no amount of puns can disguise the fact that this looks like a heap of chewed banana.

#necropolitan-fairy #automotive horrors #asks

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Survival tips for working for the Big M?

Be consistently competent at whatever he's brought you aboard to do.

2. Go back in time and work for him when he was a younger mech, before his optics started wandering in opposite directions

3. Don't be Starscream.

#Anonymous #Megatron #asks

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It's fire season on Cybertron, but I'm never so busy treating severe facial burns that I lack the time for our favorite seasonal tradition.

Christmas Eve Eve stream is at 8 (EST).

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Hhhhhh okay so like. I'm drunk and on a completely different Tumblr account and fandoms than I used to be and I KNOW this sounds stupid but. BUT. Once, years ago, I was a barely-adult insomniac still stuck in my parents' house, and I was pacing the floor at night too anxious and half-delirious (and uh. Apparently experiencing mild hallucinations due to black mold but whatever) to even try make it to sleep, and I saw you seemed to be awake too, and I sent a message that I'd probably cringe at if I read it right now. I don't even remember what I said besides that nothing felt real/normal, but I remember your response. You said the things I could see in the dark were the exact same things as what I saw in the day, just clothed in a tasteful black... and I smiled. I didn't fall asleep for quite a while after that, because this is life and not a cute story, but I remembered. It stuck in my brain time after time through several life changes, including moving out, changing jobs to one I came to love, and I still do think about it whenever I start to get scared of the dark. It's helped me way more and way longer than you probably meant it to, and so I know this might be awkward, but tonight I just thought I should finally thank you. (And yes, I know, you have a reputation to maintain... but you can very easily point out that you never meant to say something that came to mean a lot to me, it just Happened To Occur... but like. Seriously. Thank you.)

Oh, I think my reputation can withstand a few blows, especially if it means being of some assistance to a human who'd done nothing to wrong me personally. So unless you're that sunglasses fellow from last month who poured his energy drink out on me, know that it was my pleasure and that it's good to hear you're in a happier and presumably mold-free place in life.

#ican'tgetintomyotheraccount #asks

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I'm sorry, Breakdown. This seductive lady of the night eats small birds and rodents without blinking and that's something you just can't give me.

#thenightetc #replies

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We live in an outpost surrounded by 46,000 miles of trees and snakes. I'm darkly curious to know what sort of local girls Leah has met out there.

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he is the queen

#Yes he is. #Yours truly

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What's the worst you've done to someone for ruining your paintjob.

Just last month I had a human back into me and then screech at me, and that night I dreamed of boiling down their ugly hybrid and then tossing them into the stinking molten metal and plastic.

Life's so much less fun when the Autobot pets monitor your every move.

#kn0ckoutt #asks

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I mean, surely it's not that different from us having a Dr Butcher or something, which is not inconceivable

My current favorite example.

#nolongeranalleycat

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You have to admit, Dr, Concussion kinda goes hard.

I'll put it on my list of potential names to call myself if things ever go so pear shaped that I need a new one.

#Anonymous

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I actually did know a mech in med school whose name translated very roughly to “Spark Blowout” and another whose name translated even more roughly to “Patient Killer.”

#Personal history

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Yes I had wanted to get this done for Pride but holy shit I have drawn robits in so long it took me all week to get this figured out. But I love it I love them they’re so gay gay homosexual gay.

#Me and mine #And Starscream.