idiopath-fic-smile

[idiopath-fic-smile]

SO i've got a ton of creative projects i've been wanting to pursue, but it's super hard to justify prioritizing them over paid work. to that end, especially as i near the finish line on writing season 3 of starship iris, i've been thinking about getting my mostly-dormant Patreon running again.

if you think you'd be potentially interested in backing me on Patreon, would you do me a tremendous favor and take a two-question survey here, so i can get a sense of what type of work people would most like to see from me (songs? prose? scripts for shows i can't yet afford to make? that dnd concept album, posted track by track? another option?)

should take about 20 seconds, maybe less. it would be a tremendous help. thanks!

#signal boosting to the fic account!

[idiopath-fic-smile]

nothing like taking a break from writing for work to...also write.

i now have 4k of maybe the most niche fic i've ever written (julie the reagan-hating waitress and the unnamed fry cook from this fall in love and also hate reagan together).

does it even count as fanfic at this point if zero canon characters have even been hinted at thus far? i will leave that to the philosophers.

it will ultimately incorporate a tiny bit of canon characters, i'm just not there yet

pls drop me an ask or a chat if you're up for a beta read! it would be a big help

#my true fandom is just loathing conservative 1980s politicians #never ever gets old as far as i'm concerned

[idiopath-fic-smile]

taskmaster au? could be gen fic or any pairing

amazing. your mind.

okay, i think this one is crying out for leverage. new leverage because i refuse to include nate:

eliot is the host.

the most chaotic challenge of the season is "cook a steak without entering the kitchen."

harry attempts to rig up arm extensions out of broomsticks. he can't even get the steak into a pan.

breanna tries to overheat a laptop enough to get some kind of sear on the outside of the steak but unfortunately, she'd already upgraded all the computers on set to run super-efficiently as a favor to the crew and she can't even get the laptops to warm. she winds up researching the history of steak tartare and the semantics of the word "cook," elaborately plating the meat raw on a soap dish.

sophie convinces one of the lighting technicians to cook her steak for her. she stands just outside the doorway, calling out instructions. however, her charisma makes him visibly nervous and he accidentally drops the steak in the trash.

parker steals a camera guy's lighter to rig up a blowtorch in the garage. she's halfway through a really nice crust when she gets bored and somehow manages to explode the steak.

hardison hacks the smart thermostat and uses it to order delivery from a nearby steakhouse. "you did not cook the steak," eliot growls. "i caused the steak to be cooked," hardison replies with a grin. he and sophie high five.

eliot is outraged to realize that technically, parker came the closest, in that she did successfully apply heat to the meat in such a way as to alter the protein structure. "this is," says eliot in a low voice, "the single worst way anybody's cooked a steak since the invention of fire." "that's my girl!" says hardison.

there was a grill outside

there was a grill outside

the next episode, the contestants are charged with bringing in "something surprising" as a prize. hardison's contribution is a coupon for a dinner for two with eliot at the nicest restaurant in town. "he'd be good company if he wasn't so hangry," hardison explains. it's got eliot's signature at the bottom. eliot did not sign it.

parker's contribution is a coupon for a dinner for three with eliot at the nicest restaurant in town.

yeah, she just stole hardison's and added another spot for a name.

"surprised?" says parker. "that's one goddamn word for it," says eliot.

now parker and hardison are playing to win.

#leverage ot3 #leverage au #food cw #this one got away from me #5 au facts meme

[idiopath-fic-smile]

eposette groundhog day au?!

HELLLL YEAH

from the "name an AU and i'll tell you five facts about it" meme here

cosette has become a high school choir teacher in puxatawny, the small town where she grew up. she had a rough couple of teenage years in the foster care system and she has fond memories of how singing in school let her feel free.

eponine made her every career decision to get the fucking hell out of puxatawny. she didn't really expect her journalism degree to lead to a stint as a weatherwoman but fuck, she'll take it

as teenagers, eponine and cosette were briefly in a garage band together. it broke up because neither of them were willing to acknowledge the growing romantic interest—and, okay, simmering lust—they felt for each other.

eponine agreed to do the whole stupid schlocky hometown reunion concept WELL before learning that cosette was still there. jesus. and honestly, how was eponine supposed to guess that not only did cosette never escape small-town pennsylvania but also that cosette's school choir is doing a special groundhog day performance for the news?

i'm not saying that the only way to break the time loop is for eponine and cosette to save the news broadcast (when the scheduled soloist loses her voice) by singing a romantic ballad about how every day feels new when you're in love but i guess i'm also uhh not not-saying that

#askmemery #5 au facts meme

[idiopath-fic-smile]

im worried that last one was mean and too restrictive so how about straight up space au. aliens and shit let's get INto it

aw bro no worries and also re: space HELL YEAH

from the "name an AU and i'll tell you five facts about it" meme here

we're going vaguely star trek on this one because why the hell not

grantaire is a member of that race of extraterrestrials that is mostly renowned for its hot green alien ladies. if you ask him, he'll claim this doesn't bother him—never being taken seriously, his every word projected to be a come-on, (he is attracted to a wide range of people, he reminds himself, so he should be okay with it, he tells himself)—but secretly it bothers him quite a bit.

just to make things interesting, enjolras is not captain of the ship. he is a low-ranking security officer whose extreme political ideals have gotten him into hot water before. he doesn't want to impose his own notions on other space cultures but he has a really hard time with the concept of not interfering when there is clear injustice at play.

cosette is the captain's daughter but she is determined to prove herself on her own merits. she's there for diplomacy and she insisted on hiring eponine, who is the best navigator this side of orion's belt but uh it's complicated. sometimes eponine will say "we can't take that route" but refuses to explain why and cosette always has to weigh, like, the mood of the crew vs. her burning curiosity about what eponine has seen and knows.

the thing about the time grantaire stowed away on cosette's ship, was discovered by enjolras and tried to flirt his way out of it, okay, is that enjolras didn't fall for it for one second. enjolras didn't see grantaire's half-open shirt and heavy-lidded eyes—and okay, the green skin—and assume that grantaire was nothing more than a barely restrained libido in search of a hot swashbuckling human to get off with. and that, perversely, strengthens grantaire's regard for him.

the problem is that they're in grantaire's native region of space, and eponine insists it will be helpful to keep grantaire on, at least for a while. but also: eponine and grantaire clearly have a history. both cosette and enjolras notice the two of them in the mess hall with their heads bent together, talking and laughing, and both cosette and enjolras are a little more irritated about this than they maybe strictly should be.

#askmemery #5 au facts meme

[idiopath-fic-smile]

uhhhhh e/r beach bum + lifeguard au

from "name an AU and i'll tell you five facts about it" here

this is a lovely prompt and i'm gonna apologize rn bc i will not be able to do it justice due to the fact that i wilt at the slightest hint of sun or sand

grantaire was once a young surfing prodigy who washed out (no pun intended) after an injury and now he sometimes sells popsicles on the beach. he can't bring himself to surf again but he also can't bring himself to totally leave those waves behind. he is making a very patchy living and camping out on the couch of ex-lawyer friend bossuet, who runs a little seaside bar

enjolras is an idealistic lifeguard who really believes in making the beach experience as accessible as possible, not just for wealthy tourists. grantaire starts showing up on days grantaire isn't working just to watch enjolras ensuring the safety and wellbeing of everyone on the beach

combeferre is a marine biology grad student gathering data on like local seaweed. grantaire feels so bad for this poor nerd who is clearly totallly at sea (no pun intended) that sometimes grantaire helps him accumulate samples without knowing combeferre is enjolras's longterm bff.

there is an Inciting Incident where grantaire is so distracted by the majesty of enjolras like reprimanding some drunk tourists for throwing rocks at sea lions (Marine Mammal Protection Act, motherfuckers) that grantaire forgets to observe proper sun safety rules and gets sunstroke, oof how embarrassing for a local.

enjolras sees grantaire drop to the sand in a half-faint and runs to him with a bottle of water and escorts him to the shade. enjolras crankily (but gently) rubs sunscreen on grantaire's back and lectures him about Slip, Slap, Slop (slip on a shirt, slap on a hat, slop on some sunscreen) and grantaire woozily says "isn't that for Australia?" which it is, it's part of the Australian Cancer Council's messaging and grantaire only knows this because he toured australia when he was a hotshot kid athlete. which is about the time enjolras puts together that grantaire is the same promising young surfing talent who inspired enjolras to get into lifeguarding.

(bonus) they share a popsicle and kiss under a bridge but way later bc there is nothing sexy about sunstroke

#askmemery #5 au facts meme

[idiopath-fic-smile]

Let’s play a game. Send me a potential AU and I’ll tell you five fun facts that would happen in a story.

#hello friends it is a monday night and i am feeling UNCHARACTERISTICALLY SOCIAL #so hit me up if you feel like it! <3

[idiopath-fic-smile]

one writing trademark, maybe not universal but distinctive: a certain je ne sais quoi gift for achieving dramatic irony through an unreliable narrator.

point of contrast 1: some unreliable narrators are deliberately opaque, such that one has to first suspect they're being lied to and then start piecing the truth together, possibly requiring rereading; that's neither better nor worse, merely different, from this technique of yours that I'm talking about. you sell the narrator as unreliable while also making it perfectly clear what it is they're missing or omitting.

point of contrast 2: when some writers try to communicate those kinds of misunderstandings, they fall back on swapping in parts of the other party's POV in a way I find messy or distracting, or making the narrator a mindreader who knows too much about the other party's internal state to be realistic, just happening to miss exactly the hidden thoughts that would clear up the misunderstanding. that's a pet peeve of mine, so it feels very distinct from this technique of yours I like so much.

you present very clear and realistic perspective characters and their worldviews, but in a way that makes the reader very aware of the character's blindspots, and that's REALLY engaging.

oh gosh, that is lovely to hear! i am a big fan of reading experiences where you realize you have more information that the POV character, so i am really glad it works for you on that level.

#assorted memery

[idiopath-fic-smile]

writing trademark: someone blinking a lot, when they try to hide their real emotions! i don't feel like you overdoing it, but i only ever saw that in your writing, and so whenever it appears during the text, i'm always like "that's right, it's idiopathicsmile" :)

oh man, yeah, well-spotted! i have terrible body awareness (both in being physically clumsy, and also often forgetting that i have a body) but body language is of course tremendously useful as a shorthand in writing and the result is that i have an extremely small menu of physical tics that i am basically always drawing from, haha.

#assorted memery

[idiopath-fic-smile]

Re: writing trademarks, one thing that stands out for me is a very witty and funny narration voice, regardless of the pov character or fandom, as well as just a general aura of like, whimsy.

Some particular standout lines include "He had never bridged that distance faster, not even on Soup and Boardgames Night" from Lovesickness and "FIX IT, YOU VILLAIN, shrieks Crowley’s heart" from Birds of a Feather. Also the "inherent stochasticity of the universe" bit from In Defiance of all Geometry stuck with me to the point of me borrowing it for a chemistry presentation at work a few years back.

re: wit, thank you! re: whimsy, i think it is a thing i do almost automatically as a way to keep my adhd brain entertained. and i hope your work presentation of several years ago went well!

#assorted memery

[idiopath-fic-smile]

I’d say your writing trademark is snappy and fun dialogue

thank you! i do love having characters crack wise at each other

#assorted memery

[idiopath-fic-smile]

What’s my writing trademark?

I’ve seen this for art, but what about my writing makes you go, “ah, that’s a _____ production”?

#conserving my energy tonight for a marathon day of cooking tomorrow #i feel like i don't have a writing style in the same way a lot of midwestern americans will insist they don't have an accent #feel free to tell me differently i guess #askmemery

[idiopath-fic-smile]

I need you to know that i read your Singing In the Rain fic yesterday and immediately went to the library to borrow the dvd becuase i haven't seen the movie and now i want to. anyway the fic is lovely your characterization is great and i hope you have a wonderful day

aw, this is so lovely, i hope you enjoyed the movie!

[idiopath-fic-smile]

That one scene from W.A.R 👀👀

#this is so cute! #i love poor grantaire's shocked expression haha

[idiopath-fic-smile]

Happy Halloween! In lieu of a fistful of tiny candy bars, I wrote a thing

Title: "Giving it My All, at the Bloodsuckers' Ball!" Category: F/F Tags: Member of a 1960s monster-themed novelty band/actual literal monster, or, "those G-rated vintage sapphic monsterfucker vibes that absolutely nobody was asking for" Wordcount: 2,616 (including an original song demo because I've gotta be me, babyyy) Excerpt:

“Oh, everywhere she goes, all the guys, dig her ruby lips and her hypnotic eyes And I’m heartbroken, I’m a mess ‘cause everybody wants to date the vampiress!” The singer turned her red-painted pout to the crowd, hamming it up as she crossed the stage. Her backing band wore shabby suits, and her slinky black dress looked like it had come from a costume trunk, a poor person’s idea of what a rich person might wear, but she had a certain jaunty charisma, an infectious smile, and the beginnings of a healthy flush on her cheeks. On the edge of the marble dance floor, Sabina closed her eyes and massaged her temples. “Enjoying the party?” said Leander from the vicinity of her left shoulder. “Did you,” said Sabina, voice low and dangerous, “while organizing the single largest vampire gathering of all of 1966, decide to book a bunch of humans in a monster-themed novelty act? “Shh.” Leander grinned. “Don’t ruin the single funniest thing I have done in fifty years.” Sabina opened her eyes, the better to glare at him. “They’re called Vera and the Vamps,” Leander added, voice choked with suppressed laughter. “They’re from Hoboken. Their agent promised an evening of hair-raising musical thrills and chills.” “The next time some aspiring young Van Helsing goes looking for our kind, I’m giving him your home address,” grumbled Sabina. “This is absurd. This isn’t even the fox in the henhouse, this is hens in the, the fox den. They won’t make it to the end of their first set, and then we’ll have to spend the rest of the night either in stone silence, or listening to Dimitri attempt to play the flute.” This, at least, earned a flinch. Dimitri’s flute playing sounded a little like an endless shrieking wind, if that wind somehow also had diarrhea. “He’s had five hundred years to practice.” Leander sounded almost awed. “You’d think he would’ve at least learned proper breath control.” “I think he mostly performs for mortals, and lets the pale skin and chiseled features do the heavy lifting, as it were,” said Sabina. “Can’t say I’ve ever seen the appeal.” “Well yes, I know you haven’t,” said Leander. Sabina didn’t reply, too busy watching the stage.

Link: Here!

#Member of a monster-themed novelty band x actual literal monster #i'm begging you friends: please help me make this a recognizable AU scenario #it would be a SCREAM

[idiopath-fic-smile]

13k, complete. cosmo/don/kathy

summary:

Don and Kathy would move in together. They would have a dog or two and then inevitably, a small parade of adorable little brats who would call him Uncle Cosmo, and they would spend less and less time with him, not on purpose but busy with the rest of their lives, and ultimately Cosmo would learn to make his peace with it because he’d have no other choice and he would have to try to move on and not live too much in his memories. He could picture it so clearly, he figured if the songwriting gig with Monumental didn’t pan out, he could always return to the backwater circuit with a new act: The Amazing Cosmo of the Cosmos—ladies and gentlemen, he sees the future, he reads the stars, he silently pines for his best married pal and all the while tap dancing! Don and Kathy inviting him along on their honeymoon, though—that part was a surprise.

featuring multiple original showtunes, polyamorous shenanigans on a boat, feelings, romance, the worst knock-knock joke you've ever read, confessions, and some dawning realizations.

#it's here! it's done! #singin in the rain ot3 #singin in the rain #singin' in the rain #the title i picked at the last minute BUT it's in “fit as a fiddle” which don and cosmo perform together AND #it's in “singin in the rain” which don sings about kathy #so like. i've connected the two dots dot gif #this one was so fun to write; many thanks to everyone who followed along

[idiopath-fic-smile]

i could still use a pair of eyes or two, please toss me a chat if you're interested!

ETA: i'm good now, many thanks to those who volunteered!

from the bottom of my heart i just wanna thank everyone still following this blog despite the fact that at this point there is almost zero pattern or consistency as to what fandom i'm gonna write next. if you have bounced that is totally understandable but if you've stuck around so far, much appreciated! <3

also i wanna warn you that i think what's coming next down the pike is *checks notes* ot3 fanfic for Singin' in the Rain (1952) so prepare for that i guess