incorrect-rainbow-rocket-quotes
incorrect-rainbow-rocket-quotes
Rainbow Rocket Quotes
Totally accurate quotes from a group of evil dads (and one mom). Submissions and asks are always open! Those here for the Fusion AU can follow this tag. Join us on Discord!
963 posts
Guzma: I'm an adult! I do grown-up things! Independence!
Guzma, moments later: Plumes, what’re taxes --
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Ghetsis: Would you all be there for me if I was going through something?
Cyrus: No. Absolutely not.
Archie: I hope it sucks, whatever you're going through.
Maxie: I hope it emotionally scars you for the rest of your life.
Giovanni: I hope that you reach out to me just so I can ignore you.
Lysandre: I can't wait to go to your funeral, knowing that I could have changed that outcome.
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Archie: We might’ve disagreed at first, but I grew on you eventually!
Maxie: Yes, like moss or toe fungus.
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Cyrus: I once quoted a vine in front of Guzma. None of the other leaders believe him, and now he lives in fear of my supposed knowledge of the internet.
Cyrus: It’s delightful.
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Giovanni: Apparently we’re getting numerous requests from people who wish to add a “Piers” to Team Rainbow Rocket.
Lusamine: “Piers?” ... Oh! I have heard of him! I've taken his records away from my son!
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Ghetsis, to a small Anthea and Concordia: Children, would you like the present I brought back from the forest? It’s not what you asked for AT ALL!
Ghetsis, holding up N by the scruff of his shirt like a kitten: It’s a sad boy I picked up in a gutter! He’s a ghastly little fellow, but maybe you’ll get used to it.
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Guzma: Oi, Lys, I have a favor. It’s about my clothes --
Lysandre: Burn them. Burn them all.
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The problem with me is that, apparently, I have the depression of Eeyore the Donkey from Winnie the Poo, and the god complex of Gordon Ramsey, and they're always fighting.
Cyrus
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Proton: I don’t know how you got it to look so accurate, but it was WORTH IT.
Petrel, disguised as Giovanni, checking himself in the bathroom mirror: Mm-hmm.
Giovanni, walking in: Can I get in here, I need to — ARCEUS —
Petrel, in a Giovanni imitation: “It’s like looking in a mirror!”
Giovanni: No, it isn’t, Petrel.
Petrel: “Who’s Petrel?”
Proton: I already can’t tell who’s who!
Giovanni: Take that stuff off, already.
Petrel: “Ari! Get in here and settle this!”
Giovanni: Do not call Ariana ‘Ari’!
Ariana, walking in: What’s going on in here — Oh! [Laughing, pinching Petrel’s cheek] Wow, a smiling Giovanni, aww.
Giovanni: Ariana, you’re encouraging him.
Archer, walking in: I need the bathr — oh. Wow. This is confusing.
Giovanni: No, it’s not!
Petrel: “You’re my admins and I love you, but you’re terrible, you’re all terrible!”
Giovanni: I don’t say that!
Proton, Archer, and Ariana: [All mumbling in disagreement with Gio]
Petrel and Giovanni, pinching the bridge of their nose: Unbelievable.
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Giovanni: I don't think I can mansplain, manipulate, malewife our way out of this situation.
Ghetsis, raising up his cane like a bat: Manslaughter it is!
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Lysandre, whispering: Lusamine, we need a way to distract Professor Sycamore and your group of scientists.
Lusamine, whispering: Leave it to me.
Lusamine, clearing her throat: Gyrados are able to learn more Normal and Ice-type moves then Dragon or Flying-type moves combined, and therefore should be classified as Water / Ice or Water / Normal. Discuss.
Professor Sycamore, Colress, and Faba: [Immediately launch into a biology debate]
Lysandre: Oh, I don’t like this. I don’t like this at all.
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Colress: Can we talk for a second about how liquid nitrogen is essentially just reverse lava?
Maxie: No we cannot --!
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Lusamine: Can you imagine not being human, and just living out your days as a weeping willow, though? Beautiful? By the water? Unburdened?
Guzma: I wanna be the one from Harry Potter that beats the shit out of everyone and everything.
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Professor Sycamore: I want you to look me straight in the eyes.
Lysandre: Professor, you can’t have me look at those eyes and be straight at the same time.
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Colress: What if everyone just chilled out?
Ghetsis: No.
Colress: What if the whole world just relaxed, just a little bit?
Ghetsis: I neither can nor want to.
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