nonbinary-smartass

[nonbinary-smartass]

[nonbinary-smartass]

[nonbinary-smartass]

That's the British spelling bro

PETITION HERE

[nonbinary-smartass]

Not sure why y'all get your knickers twisted when someone's trying to warn others about dangerous people. I'm sure you'd do the same for white supremacists making a good point?

Hopefully you grow up soon and realise a few things about the world before you get anybody hurt. In the mean time, feel free to shut the fuck up about trans women.

END SARS

END POLICE BRUTALITY IN NIGERIA

#anyway #support the Nigerian protestors #fuck gender essentialists 👍

[nonbinary-smartass]

I fell asleep without my white noise and jerked awake when my mom came in from work, so I actually remembered having a dream (very rare for me).

My dream was about a cult; I was in the perspective of the cult leader's main girlfriend, and she was very much Not On Board with the cult shit and wanted out. I don't remember much in the middle except that she got out and then was captured and forced back into their compound.

At the end of the dream the cult leaded had his arm around my throat and was whispering (and texting me because dream logic) in my ear that if I'd just give in and marry him, it would all be wonderful. He kept saying sweet things, but then accidentally revealed that he wouldn't allow the internet in the compound anymore because it "made people think bad things about us" or something. I remember going still and planning how to kill him just for that, and then I woke up.

Not the most original or exciting dream. I blame my current obsession with cults and MLMs (what's the difference? *da dum tsh*) for the subject matter. I'm still laughing that the point where my dream MC decided the cult leader needed to die was when he was going to deny internet to his followers, lmao.

#dream #cult #dreaming #dreams

[nonbinary-smartass]

I love seeing supposed trans people knowingly misgender trans women characters, that's just. *clutches fist* Yeah.

#transmisogny mention #im just #really? gonna put you're enby gay and dont want truscum transmeds or terfs around on your blog huh? #and even when someone oointed it out you ignored them 🤔

[nonbinary-smartass]

I've never really liked/felt in tune with my name. I know it's my name and I'll respond if I hear it or w/e, but it feels like it isn't my TRUE name; idk what is though... :/

I feel like that too. Like, my name is practically a stranger's name to me. It's weird.

#🤘 #big trans mood tbh #i respond to my given name and recognise it as a way to be addressed #but my mouth doesn't work right when i refer to myself directly (beyond the 'hi this is X!' social script)

[nonbinary-smartass]

So I'm gonna talk to my psychiatrist tomorrow (with encouragement from my therapist) about getting evaluated for autism and ADHD.

I've lived my life in a fog that didn't lift very much until last year, and the more it lifts the more I notice things about myself. I rock, I pluck at my shirt, I do weird things with my fingers, all day long. Some days less than others, but I've been rocking when I'm concentrating on a case. I make myself stop and look around nervously, get back to the case, and end up rocking again.

I'm terrified that I'm exxagerating or outright making up these habits. Like I said, I've been in a fog for nearly 2 decades, and aside from remembering my mom constantly fussing about my leg jiggling I don't remember much of anything, let alone potential signs of a disorder. So what if I'm making it up?

I can make myself stop, but it starts right back up when I'm not paying attention. I've always had a hard time with classes or training lasting more than 1.5 hours; I need to move. But I've also been wondering if I'm autistic or have ADHD for years, so what if I'm just amplifying what's already there? How do I tell the difference?

#diagnosis #undiagnosed #i don't want to clutter the adhd or autism tags so #i feel so stupid trying to get evaluated at 30 #i tried at 26 and got told that there was no way i have adhd bc i was able to focus (mostly) when talking to the therapist #and that it was pointless even if i had it bc I'm not a little boy and did well in school #(failing my first semester at uni and nearly being hospitalised multiple times while at uni apparently doesn't matter next to my 3.5 GPA)

[nonbinary-smartass]

I get so fucking tired when ignorant hearing people try to talk about sign language.

[nonbinary-smartass]

Fuck transmeds✌️ Especially transmeds who claim to support nonbinary ppl.

I have gender dysphoria. I have genital dysphoria. I desperately want hormone therapy. But the argument is always about"fe/male brains", so how the fuck can I possibly be trans in that light? How are you supporting me if you don't believe my brain can be nonbinary?

Fuck you for how you treat trans people fortunate enough to not have dysphoria. Are you trying to force them to develop dysphoria so they can be "real trans"??? Why the fuck, if YOU really have dysphoria, would you treat people who don't have dysphoria like this? You think they don't suffer enough so by gum you'll make them suffer???

(And don't anybody start with that bullshit about how I'm actually binary trans and afraid to admit it. Imagining forcing myself to live as either of the (western-centric) binary genders makes me equally nauseous, equally depressed, equally suicidal. Fuck off.)

[nonbinary-smartass]

Just something I've noticed

[nonbinary-smartass]

"woman"? no, you misheard. i'm an omen.

[nonbinary-smartass]

I wanted to ask... I had a friend who was like my LGBT guru, if I had any questions I went to her on it, at one point I said "I think I might be bi, or straight, I think I like guys" and she said "no you like girls" and another time "I think im trans" " no youre not, youre a girl" and I cant help but think I would have realised I was trans sooner had she not done that.... I don't know how to think about it, and I was wondering if you could help me decipher it a bit... as a fellow trans person...

My dear lgbt+ kid, 

I can relate to what you go through - Years ago, I told my girlfriend I think I might be a trans boy and she instantly shut it down. No, of course I am not, she would knew if I was, I am just a lesbian who likes to dress masculine. 

She was my first serious relationship, one of the first openly queer people I ever met and so I looked up to her as my “LGBT guru”, too. I believed that she must be right because, well, I was a young closeted baby queer and she wasn’t. 

When I look back, I feel the same way you do. Maybe I would’ve figured out and started to accept my gender identity earlier if she didn’t react that way. 

How to think about it? Well, the most important part may be to accept that she was wrong - which can be more difficult than it sounds. If we look up to someone and their advice/opinion means a lot to us, it can hurt to suddenly see that they can be wrong. It can feel like you wasted your trust on that person or you may blame yourself for believing them (blindly). 

Please know that it’s okay to feel hurt or even angry. A good advice-giver will help YOU figure out what YOU feel and want - not treat their own feelings as the ultimate truth. It sounds like that’s what she did. She thought you’re not trans, so that was the truth in her eyes. 

I’m not saying you need to hate her now or even that she’s a terrible person. I don’t know her and can’t judge why she reacted that way. It is possible that she genuinely tried to help and just did it in a counterproductive way. 

The most important thing, however, is that you learned more about yourself, despite her wrong advice. That’s wonderful! I am proud of you. I can’t tell you how to think about her but I can tell you that you found your answers, even when the circumstances made it harder. Maybe you would have figured it out sooner if things went differently, yes, but you figured it out now and that’s good news! You can be proud of yourself for that! 

With all my love, 

Your Tumblr Dad 

#i had a counselor who dismissed any notion that i could feel romantic feelings for my best friend #and informed me i waas mistaken when i brought up that i might be non-binary #and so i stayed confused for years #i still can't quite shake her voice in my head

[nonbinary-smartass]

fuck instagram except for the lesbian couple i follow on there with two kids who got married 10 years ago as a “heterosexual couple” and then one night one of them came out as a lesbian and then the other one came out as a trans woman so they stayed together and now live their best gay life

[nonbinary-smartass]

Your given name and assigned birth is just your cissona

[nonbinary-smartass]

#big mood

[nonbinary-smartass]

i’m not AMAB or AFAB, i’m AHAB and i have to kill this fuckin whale