songsofacagedbird

[songsofacagedbird]

you’re something out of a dream

a love letter to luxor’s balo driskell

While I think tissues are needed at this point for all three of these playlists, can I just say with Balo’s I think they’re especially needed? Maybe I’m just extra soft for Balo in general but hers personally made me the most emotional, she definitely went hard with this one. Anyway, it covers the entire Luxor timeline for her just about, major plot points and stuff, but a bit less so the reveal of her main secret that occurred during graduation honestly - as this playlist was made before that and given it took me ages to perfect the end, I’m just going to leave it be. 

Again, there’s references to other muses / plot points littered throughout, as well as references to eating disorders and a couple nicer things like her love for art. I’d also like to thank Lex for her help during these playlists, from the idea itself to helping me test listen yet again, this is going to be a pattern in these descriptions and I’m sorry for anyone who like “Katie stfu” already but genuinely it’s really thanks to her that these even exist and honestly they’re actually some of the playlists I am most proud of to date.

Please keep in mind that the standard Balo triggers apply (mental health, eating disorders, abuse / child abuse). Any additional tws will be noted on their sections if they apply.

in dreams you will lose your heartaches. whatever you wish for, you keep | pre-luxor (aka pre-rp):

balo before luxor, navigating her life

Song of the Caged Bird (Lindsey Stirling) [ instrumental ] // Castle On A Cloud (Isabelle Allen) [ I know a place where no ones lost. I know a place where no one cries. Crying at all is not allowed, not in my castle on a cloud. ] // Paint the Pictures (of Verona) [ I paint the picture of the oceans I'll never see. I hold a candle through the darkness so I believe. ] // almost home (mxmtoon) [ No one ever says all the love you give might not be enough. Broke my heart in two a couple times before it hurt too much. ] // A Dream Is a Wish Your Heart Makes (Lily James) [ Have faith in your dreams and someday your rainbow will come smiling through. No matter how your heart is grieving, if you keep on believing the dream that you wish will come true. ]

does it hurt to see how our smiles have changed, my friend? | summer & fall 2019:

the period of time I was playing Balo in Luxor originally, from June 2019 right up until her intervention in October

Friends In The Corner (Foxes) [ Do you need someone? Everybody's looking like they need someone. All of my friends in the corner, everybody's looking like they need someone. Pretending we don't fear the morning. ] // Scars To Your Beautiful (Alessia Cara) [ She says, “beauty is pain and there's beauty in everything. What's a little bit of hunger? I could go a little while longer,” she fades away. ] // Never Gonna Let You Down (Colbie Caillat) [ I'm never gonna let you down, I'm always gonna build you up. When you're feeling lost, I will always find you, love. ] // Running with the Wolves (AURORA) [ There's blood on your lies, the scars open wide. There is nowhere for you to hide, the hunter's moon is shinin'. ] // She Is the Sunlight (Trading Yesterday) [ And it will take this life of regret for my heart to learn to forget. Tomorrow will be as it always has been, and I will fall to her again. ]

you keep trying to get inside my head while i keep trying to lose the words you said | winter 2019 & early Spring 2020:

Balo’s hospitalization, and the time at home following it.

All the King's Horses (Karmina) [ Is it still a home when you're all alone? All the king's horses and all the king's men couldn't put me back together again. ] // Safe (Britt Nicole) [ Oh no, my walls are gonna break. So close, it's more than I can take. I'm so tired of turning and running away. ] // Lost Boy (Ruth B.) [ There was a time when I was alone, no where to go and no place to call home. My only friend was the man in the moon, and even sometimes he would go away too. ] // Keep Your Head Up (Ben Howard) [ 'Cause I'll always remember you the same, eyes like wild flowers with your demons of change. ] // Wake Me Up (Madilyn Bailey) [ They tell me I'm too young to understand. They say I'm caught up in a dream. My life will pass me by if I don't open up my eyes, well that's fine by me. ] // Dance (Foxes) [ I want you, got no shame. This therapy's gone to waste; when the midnight hour comes in vain, you're in my head, you say my name. ]

what the fuck are perfect places anyway? | spring 2020:

Balo’s return to Luxor, leading up to her breakdown at prom additional tws: drugs and alcohol (perfect places)

Good Day for Dreaming (Ruelle) [ There's a hope, there's a spark, there's a fire. There's a light in the dark burning brighter. It's a good day for dreaming. ] // Perfect Places (Lorde) [ All of our heroes fading, now I can't stand to be alone. Let's go to perfect places! ] // prom dress (mxmtoon) [ I'm sitting here, crying in my prom dress. I'd be the prom queen if crying was a contest. Makeup is running down, feelings are all around. How did I get here? I need to know... ]

i would sell my sorry soul if i could have it all | summer 2020:

summer camp adventures, and the starts of questioning who she is

Live Life (Zayde Wølf) [ Sometimes I think that I'm the dreamer, the one that's standing all alone. Sometimes it feels like it's forever since I've truly felt at home. ] // Celeste (Ezra Vine) [ You're something out of a dream, messing with my head and I've been looking for you. Are you hiding? ] // The State of Dreaming (MARINA) [ If only you knew my dear, how I live my life in fear. ] // If Only (Dove Cameron) [ If only I knew what my heart was telling me. Don't know what I'm feeling; is this just a dream? If only I could read the signs in front of me, I could find the way to who I'm meant to be. ]

my heart can't possibly break when it wasn't even whole to start with | fall & winter 2020:

balo’s disownment, her breakup with kitty, and coming to terms with them

raindrops {an angel cried} (Ariana Grande) [ The day you left me, an angel cried. ] // Because of You (Kelly Clarkson) [ I was so young, you should have known better than to lean on me. You never thought of anyone else, you just saw your pain, and now I cry in the middle of the night for the same damn thing. ] // human (Christina Perri) [ Your words in my head, knives in my heart, you build me up and then I fall apart 'cause I'm only human. ] // Illusion (Zedd feat. Echosmith) [ It feels like the fairytale is over. I really wanted these pages to begin with once upon a time like all those lullabies. I should've known better. ] // Cry (Kelly Clarkson) [ Is this as hard as it gets? Is this what it feels like to really cry? ] // drivers license (Olivia Rodrigo) [ Sidewalks we crossed. I still hear your voice in the traffic, we're laughing over all the noise. God, I'm so blue, know we're through, but I still fuckin' love you. ] // Until The Sun Comes Up (Gabrielle Aplin) [ Do you want to get lost? Go waste our time, lose this city skyline. Be so much better if you're by my side, find myself and lose my mind; think I need a moment to re-align. ] // Part Of Me (Katy Perry) [ Throw your sticks and your stones, throw your bombs and your blows but you're not gonna break my soul. ] // Love Not Loving You (Foxes) [ You were always giving me all of your insecurities. How could you do it? You knew what you were doing to me. ] // no tears left to cry (Ariana Grande) [ Right now, I'm in a state of mind I wanna be in like all the time, ain't got no tears left to cry. ]

you forgive, you forget, but you never let it go | spring 2021:

her classmates choice in the gym, and it’s aftermath additional tws: drowning (When the Storm is Over)

Bad Blood (Taylor Swift feat. Kendrick Lamar) [ Remember when you thought I'd take a loss? Don't you remember? You thought that I would need ya, follow procedure, remember? Oh, wait, you got amnesia. ] // Talking to Ghosts (Foxes) [ And I can be your guiding light if you just let me, but I can’t be your guiding light if you have left me. ] // When The Storm Is Over (Sofia Karlberg) [ But when it comes down something in the air says we're 'bout to drown. Baby, we wеren't meant for closure, tеll me when the storm is over. ] // Try (Colbie Caillat) [ You don't have to try so hard, you don't have to give it all away. You just have to get up, get up, get up, get up, you don't have to change a single thing ] // Still Have Me (Demi Lovato) [ So take my faith but 'least I still believe (I still believe, in me), and that's all I need. I don't have much but 'least I still have me. ]

and i don't really care if nobody else believes ‘cause i've still got a lot of fight left in me | early summer 2021:

the story of therapy, the start of recovery, learning to love oneself, and a little bit of romance.

Daisies - Acoustic (Katy Perry) [ They told me I was out there, tried to knock me down. Took those sticks and stones, showed 'em I could build a house. They tell me that I'm crazy, but I'll never let 'em change me 'til they cover me in daisies. ] // Home (Gabrielle Aplin) [ I'm a phoenix in the water, a fish that's learnt to fly. And I've always been a daughter but feathers are meant for the sky. ] // Change (Taylor Swift) [ ’Cause these things will change, can you feel it now? These walls that they put up to hold us back will fall down. ] // Dear Happy (Gabrielle Aplin) [ Don't you worry, oh no, don't be alarmed. I'm just working it out here, working it out here. I'm somebody with a recovering heart, you've waited there for me, keep waiting there for me. ] // Fight Song (Rachel Platten) [ And all those things I didn't say, wrecking balls inside my brain. I will scream them loud tonight, can you hear my voice this time? ] // Catch My Breath (Kelly Clarkson) [ Catching my breath, letting it go, turning my cheek for the sake of the show. Now that you know, this is my life, I won't be told what's supposed to be right. ] // Wildflowers (Elle Fanning) [ Wildflowers you brought me are crumbled in my hands. This love that you taught me, I still don't understand. ] // Begin Again (Taylor Swift) [ And for the first time, what's past is past. 'Cause you throw your head back laughing like a little kid, I think it's strange that you think I'm funny 'cause he never did. ] // Let's Sort The Whole Thing Out (Carly Rae Jepsen) [ I love you, this is a new thing. One more drink, let's get to the bottom of it. I love you, let's sort the whole thing out. ] // Youth (Foxes) [ And as we cross the line, these fading beats have all been severed. Don't tell me our youth is running out, it's only just begun. ] // Soft to Be Strong (MARINA) [ I took my bitterness and made it sweet, I took a broken heart and made it beat. ] // Way Less Sad (AJR) [ Don't you love it? Don't you lovе it? No, I ain't happy yet, but I'm way less sad. ]

#musings ( playlists ) #a dream is a wish your heart makes ( musings ) #eating disorder tw #abuse tw #child abuse tw #disownment tw #drugs tw #alcohol tw #drowning tw

[songsofacagedbird]

Text || Minnie 🦝

Minnie: I promise that it had nothing to do with not trusting any of you. Or feeling like I couldn't talk to you. It's just... after last year, I didn't want anyone worrying and I /was/ fine, for a while, I just... I'm not good at leaning on people. I've just always been better at being the one people can lean on.

Minnie: I don't think there's anything wrong with not being upset by it. Or think that anyone really has a right to expect someone to feel a certain way. You feel how you feel. And it makes sense that it changed you. I... I'm still really sorry that it happened.

Minnie: I know I said it before, but I really am glad that he has you.

Minnie: ... Honestly, I don't think I'll talk to him anytime soon. Especially knowing how that usually ends for both of us. I just think, for both of our sakes, that it's best we really are /done/. I'm finally learning that there are things that just cannot be fixed. I really hope he's okay, too, though... His mom can be a lot and I'm just hoping she isn't giving him a hard time.

Balo: I'm still sorry, Minnie. You shouldn't have had to feel like worrying us was an issue, or anything like that. But I understand the urge to avoid it, I don't like it when people worry about me either.

Balo: It's fine, but I suppose you know what I meant when I said The Crusade had been nice when they revealed my eating disorder though now. This is what I was most concerned about, because if my dad found out... and then they did it right in front of him, and I have no idea how I'm supposed to protect her now.

Balo: [...]

Balo: His mom seemed... upset with him over dad's book. because she thinks he had something to do with it, even though there's no way he knew anything about it. They haven't been talking, and, he would have told me if he was involved. I'm... very concerned about how she's reacting to this on top of it.

Balo: *his dad's

#I mean Ches literally did... and then sent it to Daniel to autograph because 'it's the least he could do after murdering her mother' #a fucking brat that one #minnie #txts:minnie #parkmin seo #eating disorder tw #anoxeria tw #abuse tw #events ( graduation 2021 ) #location ( lake george )

[songsofacagedbird]

Text || Kenzie🐱

Kenzie: Whatever you say.

Kenzie: I will. She left a graduation present for you. I'll bring it over later. And perhaps your mom could use someone else to talk to about stuff with, someone who gets it. Alice is a good person to talk to.

Kenzie: Hey, cuddle pile with Collen and Ches! Sounds great to me!

Kenzie: Honestly, I think Minnie really needs to talk to her mom. I'm going to talk to her too, but I think she finally needs to have a conversation with her mom about stuff.

Balo: [...]

Balo: Thanks Kenzie.

Balo: I don't think making her talk to her umma right now is the best idea though? She should have a support system there too, and I'd rather give her part of mine then find out she was alone through all of this again.

Balo: I can't stop thinking that if maybe we did more after prom, this wouldn't have happened, and she'd be okay now.

#reellykenzie‌ #txts:kenzie #kenzie #events ( graduation 2021 ) #location ( lake george )

[songsofacagedbird]

Text || Lucy 🐬💜

Lucy: Hi. I haven't seen her.

Lucy: Are you looking for her? Do you need me to help with that? Or to keep you company?

Lucy: I'm sorry, Balo. These suckers are going to pay for everything eventually. Just you wait and see.

Balo: Please! I've been looking all over for her, and it's a really big campus. Has it always been this huge? It feels like they added a billion more rooms to check since yesterday.

Balo: I don't know why everyone keeps targeting me though? The gym, game night, now this? It's not like I did anything. I hid my eating disorder and didn't tell my abusive father about my mother having an affair because I'm worried he's going to kill her over it. Why does anyone care?

Balo: Sorry

#txts:Lucy #luciellebp #lucy #events ( graduation 2021 ) #location ( lake george ) #death tw #murder tw

[songsofacagedbird]

maiacroft​:

open starter: @luxorstarters​ when: sunday brunch

“I just don’t really get it.” Emmett commented to the person sitting next to him, his typical condescending look was on. “Why are the people who got exposed still hanging around? And their families? That’s embarrassing. Not sure what part of it is more embarrassing though, the fact that they couldn’t keep their shit under wraps or the fact that now everyone here has to know about it.” If he was speaking honestly, he was fully expecting Maia to be amongst those people and when she wasn’t, he figured she was just better at keeping her shit on the down low. Which in itself was shocking to him. “Some people have no shame I guess.” He concluded with a shrug.

“Is it?” Grace raises an eyebrow at Emmett, questioning why this man thought he had any right to breathe in her vicinity at all, let alone speak to her? She was pretty sure his haircut was a violation of the geneva conventions. It certainly felt like cruel and unusual punishment for him not wear a bag over his head with it. Still, she didn’t have a bag she was willing to part with at the moment to amend that situation, so she’d have to deal with it for now. “Because I don’t think you can say much about embarrassment, considering you showed up with that haircut. Please tell me you sued your hairdresser for that monstrosity. The pain you must feel every time you look in the mirror must be agonizing. I’ve heard fish oil can help it grow back faster, I’d be more than happy to contribute to the GoFundMe to get you some.” She glances him up and down, taking in the rest of his look. “I suppose the rest of you is tolerable, though, so you can continue to speak for now. What were you saying again? Something about embarassments...”

#I am sorry for Grace apparently she's like time to insult a man #whelp #Emmett Pruit #events ( graduation 2021 ) #Grace Driskell #maiacroft #maia

[songsofacagedbird]

Text || Minnie 🦝

Minnie: Of course. Anything for you. Always.

Minnie: I promise I don't mind. I... No, you don't have to pretend that you don't know. I mean, I wish I could pretend that no one knew but I don't think my umma is going to let me forget. And it's okay, it's... Well, I suppose no one really will believe anymore if I say it's fine, huh?

Minnie: I'm sorry. I know he's your brother and I don't mean to talk badly about him. I don't even mind him sometimes. I'm just annoyed with him. Of course it doesn't make you an awful sister. Like I said before, you can disagree with his decisions and still love him.

Minnie: You guys really are close huh?

Minnie: Not that I think that's a bad thing! I'm glad he has you. And it isn't a bad question. I... I probably should apologize to him, actually. He was right about me this whole time, after all. I haven't seen him, though. Not recently. He tried to talk to me and my umma earlier but I haven't seen him since.

Balo: Okay, I’m sorry people found out like this though, Minnie, and that you didn’t feel like you could tell us? I understand why, of course, but I know how isolating feeling like you can’t tell anyone you’re struggling can be.

Balo: It’s okay? I’m genuinely not upset by it. But I dunno, I feel like I’m expected to be, and that this time last year I would have been? Maybe The Circle was right about one thing, the stuff in the gym changed me.

Balo: […]

Balo: We are! I'm really lucky to have him, and I don't know what I'd do without him honestly. I'm not sure if now is a good time to get into that with him though? He's got a lot on his plate too right now, and with how your conversations go it might be better to give him a day or two? I'm... hoping to avoid talking about the stuff with my mom when I find him too, just in case. I really hope he's okay though...

#Is it bad I wanna joke like clearly Ches is the only one who preordered Daniel's book? XD #but yeah honestly Balo's just like LEMME GO WITH WHAT MINNIE SAID #so whelp #txts:minnie #minnie #parkmin seo #events ( graduation 2021 )

[songsofacagedbird]

Text || Kenzie🐱

Kenzie: I won't go near your dad. But sending a teacher or staff over to him could work. Not sure if he would try something with them.

Kenzie: Alice is on the move to ask her to grab a drink off campus. I can't promise she won't say anything about her being there for you and Zander more or something, but you know Grandma Alice. She sort of does and says whatever she wants.

Kenzie: Yes, I definitely believe that. And I'm not totally planning to sleep over with you tonight no matter what you say.

Kenzie: I'll check on him. Promise.

Balo: He'll notice if someone talks to a teacher and they go talk to him. I think it's better to leave him be. I think the boys are keeping an eye on him, and his sons are... probably less threatening? Hopefully?

Balo: Tell Grandma Alice I say thank you when you see her again! And I really hope she doesn't, we had a massive heart to heart earlier this weekend and I think we're all good now. I even saw my dad yesterday and it actually went well? He was nice!

Balo: I'm fine, really Kenzie. There's no way I'm going to get Collen or Ches off of my floor tonight, you know? And I love you and you're welcome to pop in, but there's probably people who need you more after that secret reveal. Have you talked to Minnie yet?

Balo: Thank you!

#BALO THAT WAS NOT NICE HOLY SHIT even if it actually was kinda nice for your dad XD #events ( graduation 2021 ) #kenzie #reellykenzie‌ #txts:kenzie #location ( lake george )

[songsofacagedbird]

Balo during the Graduation Ceremony && Balo during the Father’s Day Brunch

#a dream is a wish your heart makes ( musings ) #flower gleam and glow ( visage ) #I HAD TO PULL OUT THE MATCHING HEELS AT SOME POINT #and with me leaving after this event now was the time okay #like yes Balo and Ches have matching heels and yes they make me soft #I've been wanting to pull them out since like Christmas? Thanksgiving? yeah you know how long it's been #luxorevent

[songsofacagedbird]

Text || Juliet 🦄

Juliet: Balo, where are you?? Are you alright?

Juliet: Forget your mom for a second. Let her deal with the consequences of her acts. Harsh, I know, but there's nothing you can do

Juliet: The important part is: will I be invited? haha

Balo: I'm okay! Nothing to worry about! I'm definitely not freaking out or avoiding the majority of our classmates, I'm good!

Balo: I don't know what he's going to do and that scares me, Jules. He's extremely possessive of her, she's not even allowed to see her parents, so seeing anyone - let alone cheating is a big no for him. But I suppose there's a lot of people, so as long as he doesn't get her somewhere isolated... I'll try to breathe, sorry.

Balo: Of course! Did your invite get lost? Oh no, I'll let Ches know she needs to text you the address. I'm sorry!

Balo: How are you doing, with everything, btw? I'm sorry about, you know... are you okay? I love you.

#i legit forgot what animal Juliet is supposed to have as an emoji so I was like okay what is an extremely high honor in Balo's book? #the unicorn emojii #i cannot get over the fact she gives her friends animal emojis ok anyway #abuse tw #julietxmccoy #juliet #txts:juliet #events ( graduation 2021 ) #location ( lake george )

[songsofacagedbird]

Text || Kenzie🐱

Kenzie: I see her now. I can have my grandma get her out of here if you want? I could maybe get some teachers to talk to your dad to keep him busy

Kenzie: B, are you okay? Do you need me? Or Cade? Zander?

Balo: Please do not approach my father if possible, it'll be more dangerous for whichever one of us he gets alone later if you add fuel to the fire. Your grandmother swooping in and borrowing my mom would help a lot though.

Balo: I'm fine, and definitely not sitting on the floor crying with Ches right now! But thank you for the concern, I appreciate it.

Balo: Although, if you see Zander, please make sure he's okay? I.. didn't tell him before for obvious reasons, and I'm sure he's freaking out.

#reellykenzie‌ #kenzie #txts:kenzie #abuse tw #violence tw #god it's really a neon sign Balo's not doing well when she doesn't slip in any emojis at all / doesn't have any interest in doing so #events ( graduation 2021 ) #location ( lake george )

[songsofacagedbird]

Text || Minnie 🦝

Minnie: ... i'm currently hiding from my umma, but I'll let you know if I see yours.

Minnie: I hope that's the case, but if you need some help looking for her, I don't mind. At least if I'm with someone, my umma will probably quit breathing down my neck. I mean, it's a long shot but anything is possible.

Minnie: The Crusade is on my non-existent crap-list for the rest of eternity, right above The Circle and J... Nevermind... If this is about you knowing their weakness, I would call this a serious overreaction.

Balo: Thanks Minnie! I'd appreciate that.

Balo: Are you sure you don't mind? I know you're probably dealing with a lot, considering.... is it better if I pretend I don't know that? I'm sure your umma isn't the only one breathing down your neck, I'm sorry.

Balo: You can say Jack, I know who you mean. He's on a lot of people's lists, and a lot of them are for good reason, and I'm not offended. Does that make me an awful sister?

Balo: Actually, speaking of brothers, have you seen Leo? I'm sorry if that's a really bad question, I know you two aren't really talking lately.

#not me replying to texts fast because that's about what I've got the energy for whelp send help #also since this is after the thread with Elizabeth and Cass Balo and Leo should know now so... wow you're just not going to explain shit huh #minnie #txts:minnie #parkmin seo #events ( graduation 2021 ) #location ( lake george )

[songsofacagedbird]

Text || Open

Balo: So, if anyone sees my mom please let me know if she's safe I'm freaking out.

Balo: Although Will says he's seen dad multiple times since the reveal and he's not covered in blood or anything, so she's probably just laying low and avoiding him.

Balo: Anyway The Crusade is officially banned from my graduation party next weekend! Although I'm pretty sure Ches wouldn't invite them anyway, she's not very fond of them. I think they're still mad at me for finding out their weakness to Disco music, although I wish they'd just come and talk to me instead of doing stuff like this...

#luxorstart #Balo you don't always have to try to lighten the mood / downplay shit holy shit #also if anyone wants a thread thread with Balo feel free to dm me but it's kinda like with as much as I have going on I feel like I'll get #back to y'all faster if I do a text one and I'm sorry #I also wasn't sure if people wanted me to respond to their dinner stuff or not with the whole secret reveals so I'm sorry for just tossing #up an open #abuse tw #violence tw #blood tw

[songsofacagedbird]

thexcowardlyxleo​:

Elizabeth’s initial reunion with Leo went about as well as she could have expected it to go… Because it was always too much to expect him listen to her and have a normal conversation with her, and any time she showed the slightest look of disappointment, she was the villain. It was no wonder her next stop was immediately in search of - anything to drink. In desperate times, she couldn’t afford to be picky. She took a generous sip of the champagne and prayed her headache would ease up soon. Once she heard a voice directed at her, she tried to perk up and brush her hair out of her face to look somewhat more composed. “Hmm, it seems like just yesterday I was here at this exact spot, thinking to myself what I did that was so horrible to not deserve one conversation to catch up with my son…” The passive aggressive remark slipped out before she could bite it back, and simply sighed once she heard the words out loud. “I’m sorry, I… God, you must think I’m the worst mother here- it’s… just been a difficult year… for all of us.” She smiled gently as the other went on to speak about her kids, and paused. After a moment of hesitation, she answered “Leo… He’s - probably in the art room or something, he’s always losing track of time, you know… I’m not sure if you know him? He doesn’t really make friends very easily…” At least, she assumed as much. He didn’t exactly go out of his way to tell her about them, and she couldn’t say the possibility didn’t particularly surprise Elizabeth. “And yourself?”

Cassandra blinks in surprise when she hears the passive aggressive comment, but she certainly could relate. She was surprised Zander had talked to her at all, this trip, but she supposed she could understand just how complicated everything was after talking to him. “I understand, the younger of my sons is the same way. Although, he’s never been very talkative, I suppose.” She finds herself nodding in agreement even when Elizabeth mentions that it was a difficult year. “You’re hardly the worst mother here, and I wouldn’t beat yourself up about being frustrated with him. Teenage boys can be difficult. Hopefully both of our sons outgrow it, sooner rather than later.” She takes another sip of her champagne, glancing around to see if she could locate her children. One, two, three, where was Balian? Safe, she supposed, she could see Lance still, and it hadn’t been that long she’d seen her youngest. She blinks in surprise, when Elizabeth says her son was Leo. “Everett? My children speak highly of him, actually. My daughter, especially.” At least, they did on their Instagram posts, they weren’t exactly talking to her all that much after everything that had occurred over the fall. “Zander and Balo. Alekzander is... difficult, at times. Balian, though, if you run into an excitable girl that’s almost like a human equivalent to a golden retriever, that’s my daughter. I know we’re not supposed to pick favorites but, she’s my pride and joy. I don’t know what I did to deserve her...” But just like a puppy, she was dangerously naïve at times, which made it all the more important to protect that innocence, and her smile falters when she realizes just how difficult that was going to be thanks to Daniel’s book, and she takes a longer swig of her champagne as she remember the exact issue she was trying to avoid at the moment.

#Elizabeth Everett #stitch ( leo ) #events ( graduation 2021 ) #Cass the amount i am judging you rn #is even more than normal #thexcowardlyxleo #Cassandra Driskell has no taste who'd have guessed after who she married lol #alcohol tw #drinking tw

[songsofacagedbird]

Who:  Elizabeth and Cassandra (+ Leo and Balo later on, @thexcowardlyxleo​ ) Where: The Grand Hall When: At some point during the convocation dinner

Despite the fact Cassandra had finally told Balo the truth about her biological father, she was going to try her best to keep her daughter away from finding out who it was, and that involved ensuring she didn’t get her hands on a copy of that book. She’d considered trying to grab ahold of the redhead who seemed all over her children’s social media page, try to convince her that it wasn’t in either of their best interest to let them find out, but from what she could tell from their admittedly brief interactions if something wasn’t in their best interest the girl would try her best to prevent them from stumbling into it. Which certainly gave her one less thing to worry about. Lance was an entirely different story, keeping it from him long term wasn’t going to end well, it was all a matter of figuring out how to break it to him, she supposed, in a way he wouldn’t go off the rails again.

She needed a glass of champagne. She smiles over to one of the other mothers when she takes one of the flukes, well, she didn’t seem like she was having the best time at this dinner either. At least Cassandra wasn’t the only one.  “I can’t believe we’re already back here, it feels like the year flew by.” Not quite, it’d seemed to drag on, without any end in sight.  As much as she’d missed her own children, them being home was bittersweet. They certainly had been safer when they were all away from home.  Still, she was keeping an eye out; if she could prevent it there wouldn’t be a repeat of what occurred last year. “Which one is yours? Or I suppose ones, actually, I have two currently in Luxor myself.” Small talk about children usually never hurt, maybe this would be one of the parents of the kids who were usually on her children’s social media feeds? It might be nice, to actually get the chance to talk to other parents for once without Lance hovering over her shoulder.

#alcohol tw #i figured Cass wouldn't realize exactly who Elizabeth is when approaching her okay but lemme know if I should change that #drinking tw #Elizabeth Everett #stitch ( leo ) #thexcowardlyxleo #events ( graduation 2021 ) #location ( lake george ) #cassandra driskell

[songsofacagedbird]

Balo at the 2021 Convocation Dinner

#flower gleam and glow ( visage ) #luxorevent #events ( graduation 2021 ) #a dream is a wish your heart makes ( musings )

[songsofacagedbird]

Self Para 003: But Don't You Waste the Suffering You've Faced, It Will Serve You in Due Time Word Count: 4,530 words Notes: I’ll probably reblog this onto Zander later too considering this is a duel POV one and he has his own section, although it is mostly Balo. Also this is pure angst, I’m sorry. I do feel like it is important to note that this self para did end up giving me second hand anxiety, so if you’re prone to anxiety right now or if you’re highly empathetic, please tread with caution. Thank you! TWs: Disownment, (Child) Abuse (mentioned, not actually occurring), Anxiety & Anxiety Attacks, Dysfunctional Family Dynamics, Suffocation (mentioned, not actually occurring), Blood Transfusions (mentioned, not actually occurring), murder / death (mentioned in threats)

Graduation was supposed to be exciting, a moment where she was bouncing off the walls as she eagerly said goodbye to this chapter of her life. So, why wasn’t Balo happy about it? It was almost as if she started to dread it more and more as the time passed, sure, she was relieved that it was almost summer vacation. She was still playing a certain phone call in the back of her head, how easy it could have been to- no, it didn’t matter. It didn’t do her any good to think about it, and so she shifts her attention back to packing up her room.

“They’re hosting a father's day's brunch, and I don’t want to go.” She tells the teddy bears on her shelf, knowing full well they can’t respond. But, that was what made telling them easy, they couldn’t react poorly to any secrets she whispered to them, they couldn’t worry about her, or say something that made her feel guilty for coming to them at all.

And despite how safe it was to talk to inanimate objects about everything, she’d much rather talk to Leo. He understood, probably more than anyone expected him too. Maybe they’d be able to find their own corner of the brunch on Sunday, say Zander was their father so they wouldn’t be excluded or something. Although, she was probably expected to sit with George and Jack, which, considering she’d heard through the grapevine he’d dumped Juliet, well, Balo wasn’t exactly excited to sit at a table with Jack and their adoptive parents in general after everything that had occurred the past several months, but especially now.

Maybe that made her a bad daughter, but, it was far from the first time she’d been one, and she’d doubted it’d be the last. After all there was a reason her own parents hadn’t wanted her, and she supposed that only made it worse. She wasn’t going to see her mom, she doubted Will could afford to fly in again, and Grace probably was going to try to protect herself. What was there to be excited about? She survived her last year at Luxor, but she’d survived plenty of bad situations before, it wasn’t worthy of celebration.

The shirt in her hands falls to the floor. Wait, what was that? Her head whips in the direction of the noise. Who was knocking on her door? She hadn’t been expecting anyone. Still, she picks up the article of clothing, quickly trying to fold it to pack before she forgot it.

“Balo, open up, we have a surprise for you!” Ches, but, what did she mean by a surprise? What had she roped Zander or Collen into this time? Balo sets the shirt onto the pile before she walks over to her bedroom door to open it.

Wait. Was that Grace and Will?

“Ohmygosh!” Balo throws herself at Will before reaching out to try Grace into a group hug, clinging to them closely. “When you guys hadn’t said anything, I thought that you weren’t-  because mom and dad-” She can’t help the tears rolling down her cheeks, the way she holds onto them even tighter.

“There, there.” Grace pats her back awkwardly, “we’re here. That’s what matters.” She’d never been the best with these kinds of emotions, Balo knew that, but she appreciated the effort, the attempt to comfort her. “But you might not-”

“What Gracie is trying to say is, we’re not the only surprise.” Will interrupts, “and they’re not all good. Lance is not happy I came.” Wait, why would Lance care? Unless…

Balo let’s go of her siblings immediately, turning to look at Zander and Ches. “What did you two do?” She hisses at them, but neither of them seemed keen either. Okay, so Ches hadn’t decided to do something like trying to repair family relationships, and while she feels guilty for even considering, for a moment, that Ches was capable of being so dumb. She knew that Ches didn’t always think through her plans to help, but she wouldn’t, not if she thought it’d hurt Balo.

“There’s a Father’s Day brunch, Balo. I didn’t do shit. Luxor sent out the invitation for me.” Zander groans, “but it’s going to be fine, because that means mom is coming too, which means he can’t really hurt her for talking to you right? There’s too many eyes. You can ask her all the questions you’ve been meaning to-”

“Yeah, Sherlock, until they go home.” Grace huffs, glancing over to Zander with a perplexed expression. “Did you even think before you opened your mouth?”

“She’s talking about leaving him, in case you didn’t get the memo, Grace. I know California is so great you can’t be bothered to pick up a phone call-”

“Enough.” Will interrupts the two, giving both Grace and Zander a look. “Mom has always done what she’s wanted to. If she’s decided to take a risk, it’s because she felt it was safe enough for all of us to take. She wouldn’t have helped Ches with my plane ticket if she didn’t want me here, I’m pretty certain Lance coming is the only thing she wasn’t counting on.” Wait, their mother had helped with getting Will here?

“The father day brunch invitations were already sent out, and Lance had told Zander he was coming, in my defense. This was all Mrs. Driskelll, I only provided the capital.” Ches defends herself before Balo can even glance at her. The redhead’s expression was too guilty, but Balo doesn’t have it in her to reassure her friend right now. It wasn’t like she could blame her for Lance showing up, not even if she had reached out to her mother before that point. He was like a ghost, he’d always come back to haunt her. She was the fool for thinking that she’d be free after he'd disowned her.

“How bad is it going to be if dad sees us together?” Balo questions, shifting awkwardly. Suddenly the bad gut feeling was only even more intensified. What were people going to say with Lance Driskell here after her secret reveal? Everyone knew her father was abusive now, no, she couldn’t-

She turns quickly, darting into her bathroom and closing the door behind her. Her knees sting as they hit the tile, desperately trying to find a quiet corner to tuck in onto herself and hide. She can hear them discussing who’s going to come in and check on her, whispering among themselves. A door opens, but much to her surprise it’s not the one to the bathroom. Although it opens a few minutes later, and the person who sits down beside her is the one person she’d never expect to see now.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t be here sooner, bambi.”

The tears start to fall even harder as she hears that voice, as delicate fingers tuck her blonde hair behind her ears. She can’t even bring herself to look, she wants this to be a bad dream, because that’d be easier to face than the reality of the situation. “Why didn’t you want me?” She sobs, even though she certainly didn’t want to know the answer.

“I have wanted you since the moment I knew I was pregnant with you, and that has never changed.” Cassandra Driskell reassures her daughter, continuing to stroke her hair. “Everything I have ever done was to protect you, but, I’m starting to realize I didn’t go about this the right way.”

“You think?” Zander shouts from the doorway, okay, he definitely hadn’t been the one to go grab her mother. Wait if Cass was here?

“Is he already here too?” Where was Grace? Did Will wander off? Ches- immediately, Balo has the motivation to move despite the fact she’s only getting more panicked by the second.

“I can see everyone, they’re safe, little one.” Her mother reassures her, reaching out to pull her into her arms. Immediately, Balo relaxes into the embrace, continuing to sob as her mother tries to comfort her. “I can handle Lance, you don’t have to worry about anything. I’m sorry I had to cut contact, I was trying to do what was safest for you, with how angry he was... it was better directed towards me, and only me.”

Wait, Lance had gone after her because of Balo? This was her fault, it was all her fault, again she’d failed at being a good daughter. But before she can apologize, Zander’s right there. “It was safer for you. That’s what it’s always been, an attempt to protect yourself.” He hisses, “you never loved her, or me, or Will, or Grace. We were just convenient for you.”

“That’s not true-” “Then why the fuck didn’t you leave him?”

Was Zander crying? Balo glances over to her brother, reaching out for his hand as he tries to wipe the tears from his eyes. She knew better than to draw attention to it, that pointing it out would only make things worse.

“I was scared he’d come after you, that he'd kill us for leaving him.” Cassandra’s voice shakes, for the first time her mother doesn’t seem nearly as composed as she always did. “I did try to leave once, when you and Gracie were babies. But, I couldn’t- not after I found out about Balo. There was no way I could take care of the three of you on my own. I could barely afford to take care of the two of you, and Lance- he’d promised... and I was stupid enough to believe him.”

“Is it awkward if I leave and let you guys discuss this as a family?” Ches calls to them awkwardly, “because I’m pretty sure I’m not supposed to be here for this.” For a moment, Balo laughs, but before she can say anything. Zander is answering.

“Stay, I need you to stay. Don’t fucking leave me, Chessie, please.” He sounds so broken, and immediately Ches is coming to join them on the bathroom floor. How long would it be until Will and Grace tried to crowd in here with them? Was there even enough room?

As if Grace can read her mind, she’s calling to them from the doorway. “Well, we can’t all crowd into Balo’s bathroom, so if we could move this to the living room, that’d be great. Especially if she has to stay.” Despite the snide comment geared towards Ches, Grace had a point. Balo forces herself to get up off her bathroom floor -  trying to shove the fact she would rather hide in a bathroom than face the first genuine family discussion they’d ever had in her life aside.

This was for the best though, right? Finally getting everything off of their chests, working through at least part of the past 20-or-so-years of trauma. Sure, there was no chance to fix things, but perhaps trying to talk would bring some sense of closure, answer the questions that’d been eating at her for months.

Her mother owed her, all of them, that much.

—

It seemed like the more Zander talked to his mother, the more conflicted about her he’d become. Even hours after their chat, getting dressed for the convocation dinner, he wasn’t sure what he thought. On one hand, he was glad that he was wrong about so many things with her - that she'd been willing to admit to her many, many faults as a mother. That she acknowledged how much she’d hurt them, and she was sorry, and she was going to try to be a better mother going forward. That she’d only signed those papers to ensure Balo was provided with a life she could never give her, that she knew about Grace’s girlfriend and that she supported them full heartedly - despite the fact their father certainly wouldn’t. That it wasn’t her choice to send away Will, and she’d been sneaking him money because he was her son - a fact Zander had never known until William had brought it to the table himself.

His mother wasn’t evil, she had good intentions, he could see that now, but that didn’t erase the damage she’d done unintentionally to her children. She could have gotten them out there, she should have gotten them out of there.

So why was he willing to forgive her?

He throws the tie down in frustration, before he forces himself to lean down and pick it back up. Where the fuck was Ches when he needed her? Elliot’s, probably, actually, knowing her she’d gone right back to his room as soon as she dropped Clover off at the lake house for a couple hours. Drew and Clarissa were watching the dogs this weekend during the dinners and ceremonies, something about using the time to socialize Clover with other dogs while she had them around, and he supposed that made sense. Treadwell was certainly not a bad dog to socialize with, and while he didn’t know much about Ester, it was Effie’s - so it likely wasn’t demonic.

He doesn’t even question if he should interrupt Ches and Elliot before knocking on the door. “Elswood, help! I can’t get my fucking tie.” He calls out, “I keep suffocating myself.”

“One of these days you need to learn how to tie your own tie.” Ches calls back. Well, at least he knew her well enough to guess where she was. She comes out into the hall to take the fabric from him, shaking her head a little. Wait, was she wearing yellow? That was new. “You’re going to talk to your brother this time, right?” He had been supposed to during Thanksgiving, he’d told Ches he was going to. Hell, she’d even dragged him to William in an attempt to get them to talk, and he’d gotten cold feet.

“Will he even want to talk to me?”

“You’ll never know unless you try. He’s your brother, and from the way he talks about you... yeah, in my professional opinion, yes. He does.” She informs him as she ties his tie for him.

“Your professional opinion?” “I really should start charging you for all these therapy sessions.” “That’s cute, Elswood, real funny.” “Thanks, I’ll be here all day!”

In all seriousness though, Ches had a point - even though it was obvious she was joking from her demeanor. “I’ll talk to him. So, about Elliot’s dad... should I be wishing you luck or...?”

“No luck needed, now go talk to your brother.”

As soon as the tie is finished, she’s heading back inside, not giving him much of a choice in the matter. Whatever she was up to inside was clearly more important- no, him going to talk to his brother was more important. Why did she always have to have a point? He huffs a little as he goes off to try to figure out where William was. “Will, can we talk?” He asks the moment he spots the man in the grand hall, chattering with Cassandra and Balo. “Alone. It’s important.”

“Of course.” Concern crosses the older boy's features as he lets Zander lead him off. “What’s up?”

“I’ve been a horrible brother-” He doesn’t get to finish the statement, the apology before the shock on William’s face takes him aback. Had he grown another head? He might as well have if the look his brother was currently giving him was any indicator.

“What?”

“I’ve been giving you shit for years, and it hasn’t been fair. I don’t call nearly often enough, and when I do it’s to tattle on Balo or because I’m having a crisis of some sort.” Zander points out, “and I can barely call you my brother some days after...”

“That doesn’t make you a horrible brother, it’s okay, Zander.” Will goes to pull him in for a hug, squeezing him tightly. “I know these things are hard for you.”

“I was jealous of you.” “I know.” “You aren’t mad?” “Not in the slightest. I understand why. Taking care of Balo was always your thing, and then suddenly there’s someone else stepping in and doing that too. If the roles were reversed, I’m not sure I would have taken kindly to my adoption either.”

It’s almost as if a weight is lifted from his shoulders at the genuine assurance that William didn’t hate him for what he’d put the man through, and not only that, but he understood. “I’ve done a lot of fucked up shit, Will. There were posters...”

“I know. That wasn’t your best moment, and in that moment you were acting like a horrible brother, but that doesn’t make you one.”

“It hurt, when you got sent away, didn’t it?” Of course it did, why was Zander asking this as if he didn’t already lay in bed at night and imagine how much he’d hurt William by growing even more distant after he was shipped off, and it’d only gotten worse when he’d seen how badly Balo had taken everything. No matter what Will was telling him, he was a horrible brother. A good brother wouldn’t have left him alone through that, a good brother would have...

“It did, but you needed to protect yourself too. We didn’t exactly have a normal upbringing.” Will points out, “again - I understand. Lance stabbed you, Zan. That’s more than enough reason to not upset him more.” Was he going to be okay with Lance here? Zander rubs the back of his neck as he starts to question how safe having Will here actually was. While he was actually glad to see him, he couldn’t imagine how hard of a decision this was for him. To stay safe, or walk back into the lion's den.

“Are you worried about... you know?” “Scared shitless. But it’s worth it. If I’d thought you’d be okay with it, I would have come last year. But I didn’t want to overstep...”

“I’ve regretted not inviting you.” Another regret that kept him awake, not just because he thought that Will was better at protecting Balo - they’d already talked about that. The only thing he’d been able to get out during Thanksgiving, come think of it. “I’m sorry, for how I’ve treated you Will. I love you, you’re my brother, and I’m sorry I wasn't better at expressing that sooner.” Again, Wiliam hugs him, and this time Zander hugs him back - a bit awkwardly.

“I forgave you years ago, just stop being a stranger. I want us to be mates.” Friends? He could do that.

“Mates, or mateys?” He jokes without thinking. For a moment, he worries that he’ll offend Will, but the boy chuckles, pulling away and patting him on the back.

“Why not both? I am the captain of the Flying Dutchman.” “Don’t let Ches hear you say that.” “Trust me, I know. Now come on, let’s go find Gracie. She’s terrorizing the other one you and Balo hang out with, the boy... Collen?”

Well, he couldn’t leave her to do that now, could he? And Zander has no issue following after William, feeling like for the first time - things with him and his brother were actually good. That there was no ill-blood lingering, that moving forward they actually would be friends.

If only he’d talked to him during Thanksgiving, it would have saved him a lot of sleepless nights.

—

“There’s one more thing I want to talk to you about, Balo. Now that your siblings aren’t here...”

Balo blinks, turning her attention from walking Will and Zander walk off to her mother at the words. What was there to discuss that they couldn’t say in front of her siblings? Surely she didn’t mean- for a moment she starts to panic, glancing over her shoulder for Lance but there’s no sight of the man. “It’d be better if we discussed this someplace a bit more privately.” Her mother adds, as if she wasn’t already panicked enough.

Still, she follows her mother when she leads her to someplace quieter, only breathing when she realizes Lance is nowhere in sight. Safe, they were safe. “Is everything okay, mom?”

“No, not really.” Cassandra confesses, “there’s something I’ve been meaning to tell you, about your father.” Wait, was her mother going to tell her who it was? For a moment, she feels a bit of excitement at the chance of finally finding out who it was, while it’d been eating at her since she’d put two and two together in Japan. “I haven’t been completely honest about who your biological father was. I was seeing someone when I was separated, that part isn't a secret, your father is completely aware I was. But I was trying to protect you...”

“Why would you have to protect me, if Lance knew he wasn’t my father?” Wait, Lance knew, right? Wasn’t that why he treated her even worse than the other Driskell children?

“I... might have not mentioned that fact.” Well, that made things interesting. Was he aware now? He had to have figured it out at some point down the line, right? “You don’t seem surprised. How did you figure it out?” She seemed concerned, almost confirming her suspicions that Lance knew.

“I needed a blood transfusion when we were in Japan, Zander couldn’t donate. My blood type isn’t a match to either of you....” She explains, tucking some blonde hair behind her ear. “I wasn’t sure if I could ask, when we were all together, and I just got you back, I didn’t want to- I don’t want you to leave again, so I thought if I just didn’t- you know?” She can’t help the tears rolling down her cheeks again, or the guilt she feels when her mother moves to try to wipe them away again, pulling her in for a hug and stroking her hair, whispering reassuring words she couldn’t quite make out completely over her own sobbing.

“I’m not going anywhere ever again, I promise.” Cassandra whispers, continuing to stroke her hair. “I’m so sorry you had to find out like that, bambi.” And she seemed genuinely apologetic, a bit too focused on reassuring Balo to continue on about what she wanted to say. And Balo clings to her mother even tighter at the promise she wasn’t leaving, how was she supposed to know that? She wasn’t supposed to leave her in the first place.

How was she supposed to trust something wouldn’t tear them apart again?

“Did he ever-” Could Balo even ask that, if her biological father ever wanted anything to do with her? Cassandra sighs, pulling away to look her in the eyes.

“It was safer for everyone involved if there was no contact. But, bambi, I’m not sure you’re ready for the answers to your questions.” She wants to protest, tell her mother if she was old enough to tell, surely she was old enough to know why he wasn’t involved, or who her biological father even was, but she relents, deflating as she realizes she wasn’t going to find out who it was from her mother anytime soon. “I’m sorry, I know this isn’t what you want to hear, but baby steps. He was a good man...” She trails off, and when Balo glances over her shoulder, she immediately understands why.

Was she supposed to say hello? What was the best way to handle Lance Driskell at the moment? “Balian.” He greets her, “how about I walk you and your mother back to dinner? It’s about to start, isn’t it?” Wait, was he being nice? Confusion fills her features immediately, but she doesn’t protest when he offers her an arm. This was too private, if she upset him... “You wouldn’t happen to know why your classmates are giving me strange looks, would you, lass?” He whispers in her ear as soon as she’s close enough to, his voice sending a shiver down her spine.

“Someone dug up old court records, tried to use them against Zander and I. We’ve been trying to do damage control ever since, but not everyone believes us it was a one off.” Balo whispers back, hoping the lie isn’t too obvious. Where was Zander and Will? Even Jack right now would be better than being alone with Lance and Cass. “I swear I didn’t tell anyone anything, dad.” He seems calm, but, when it came to her father, sometimes she wouldn’t know she was in trouble until he striked, and the inability to tell if she was safe, or in extreme danger, only made her even more frightened. Where was Leo? She wanted Leo, right now.

“Don’t let it happen again.” He believed her, and it suddenly feels easier to breathe. “Oh, and Balian?” As soon as the relief came across her, it was gone as it became apparent he wasn’t finished with her quite yet. “If you ever step out of line again, I’ll personally ensure you will never speak to your mother again. Do I make myself clear?” There’s a threat there, she knows it, and she’s immediately nodding along.

“Yes sir! I won’t, I promise.” She couldn’t, and once they reach the grand hall, she drops his arm.

“Good, it was nice to see you again. Come along, Cassie.” Lance doesn’t give her much room to say much else, not that Balo wanted to, and as soon as they’re gone, she can feel the tears welling up in her eyes again. Leo, where was Leo? She scans the grand hall, trying to see if she can find him but before she can get very far, there’s another person coming up to her.

“Hey there, buttercup!” Emmett greets her, although his expression quickly shifts when he notices her crying, the mirth that seemed to sparkle in his eyes getting replaced with someone much more serious. “You can come hang out with Cam and me, if you’d like.” And while she’d much rather hide behind Leo, the offer to have someone with her until more people arrived, and it wasn’t just a handful of them in the grand hall, wasn’t something she could bring herself to deny.

“Please?”

“Always. If you want to stay with us in the city this summer or anything, really. I know my father offered you an internship.” He had missed the memo; she didn’t want to discuss that, didn’t he? Still, she nods. She had been offered a design internship with The Elswoods, and she still couldn’t bring herself to say yes. After all, how much of it was them actually being impressed by her talents, and how much of it was nepotism? She wasn’t sure how much Ches had whispered in his ear.

“Can we discuss this later?” “Of course, come on. Camellia has more animal pics for you.” Now, that was a subject she was more than happy to discuss. She follows Emmett quietly, hoping that he wouldn’t be too offended; she wasn’t her usual excitable self at the moment. She had way too much on her mind to wear that mask at the moment.

Now all she needed to do was hope that somehow, she’d be able to find the energy to put it on before everyone arrived.

#disownment tw #child abuse tw #abuse tw #death tw #murder tw #anxiety tw #anxiety attack tw #suffocation tw #blood transfusion tw #a dream is a wish your heart makes ( musings ) #but tell me when will my life begin? ( self paras ) #musings ( the family ) #do you remember when we learned how to fly? | ches & zander #lance driskell #cassandra driskell #will turner-driskell #Emmett Elswood #Grace Driskell #and 3/3 of the BIG self paras written #Ches's still needs to get posted at some point but hers is secret related so #events ( graduation 2021 )

[songsofacagedbird]

parkmin--seo​:​

when: a week or so after prom  where: somewhere outside of luxor 

Minnie had spent the majority of her day hiding away in her room while throwing herself into her artwork, but after hours of doing the same thing, she found herself desiring some fresh air. It felt like forever since she had allowed herself to go outside and figured the sunshine might do her some good. She hadn’t been wrong in thinking as much, necessarily, but her mood wasn’t as improved as she wanted it to be. About a half hour passed when she decided she should probably just go back inside, but as she started to walk, she noticed Balo and ran to catch up with her. After their talk, she felt confident enough to approach her, despite the overwhelming guilt that initially washed over her every time that she saw the blonde. “Balo, hi!” She greeted her, the smile on her face feeling more genuine than most she had offered up lately. “How was your prom?” The words hopefully better than mine were on the tip of her tongue, but she bit them back because she didn’t want to talk about how prom had gone for her. All things considered, it could have been worse than being ditched for someone else, so she wasn’t too upset about it. “You looked absolutely beautiful, which is hardly surprising,” she complimented, forcing any and all negative thoughts to the back of her mind. “And your dress was gorgeous. Did you design it?” 

“Minnie! Hey, do you want to walk with me? It’s such a lovely day, isn’t it?” And Balo was going to enjoy as much of it as she could, basking in the sunlight, and enjoying as much of the warmth as she could as she tried to forget about graduation. “Prom was incredible, Cade’s here on holiday right now so it was so nice to be able to go with him. It was everything last year should have been, and more. How was yours?” It was easy to gush about her boyfriend though, having fun with him. Seeing him would also probably be the highlight of graduation too, as she couldn’t imagine the Elswoods skipping that, or well - she couldn’t imagine Emmett, Cade, or Camellia skipping it at the very least. “Thank you! I did, and Ches’s too, honestly. Colors really suit her, so it was nice to be given free range to use them. Your prom dress was so pretty too, honestly, you looked like a princess and that shade of pink looked incredible on you.” And she’d assumed that was a Minnie design, which only made it even better.

#replies:Minnie #minnie #parkmin seo #location ( lake george )