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#“that's funny” that im abt to be ur baby mama
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╰┈➤ 18+ none of these stories belong to me! this is a masterlist of all the fanfics stories i’ve read and reblogged! just thought it would be nice to have them all in one spot! (if your fic is on here and you wish not to be, please let me know!) some will have summaries if provided <3
ᡣ𐭩 how you can help palestine . fic recs m.list
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☾ @luveline
☼ You Haven't Kissed Me All Day
⭒ miguel assumes you're mad when you stop initiating kisses and tries to get back on your good side
☼ Waiting Game
⭒ the tension between you and miguel rises to an all-time high
☾ @bluesidez
☼ Firefighter!Miguel, part 2
☾ @scoobysnakz
☼ Loser!Miguel
☾ @theorphicangel
☼ Will You Be My Valentine?
☼ Lazy Day In Bed
☼ Does Cupid Give Second Chances?
⭒ you have a valentine’s date tomorrow and you’re somewhat excited for it. but there’s just one thing you’re unsure about…thankfully your trusted roommate can help. right?
☾ @lacedinweb22
☼ Valentine's Day
☼ Miguel Talks You Through It
☾ @clementine-thedestroyer
☼ Cockwarming
⭒ Miguel loves having you cock warm him.
☼ Come To Bed
⭒ Basically, sleepy Miguel fucks you because you wouldn’t come to bed and let him sleep. Fluffy at first, then turns smutty.
☾ @wyvernest
☼ Neighbor!Miguel
⭒ moving into a new city with no friends and family around. having to find your place in an entirely new space and into new people's lives.
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tuliptyper · 2 years
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HI SORRY FOR THE VAGUE REQUESTS BUT I WANNA HEAR ANY THOUGHTS U HAVE ON DOOMHEAD OR FOXY i enjoy them so badly 🙏 no pressure ofc pls take ur time mwah
YES OFC!! ANYTIME FOR U MOOT 🙏🧎
im sorry i only did doomhead bc i had more ideas for him and it looked weird to have like paragraphs abt DH and 4 sentences about foxy 😭😭 ill write a separate post about him if you want nws!!
rlly messy post, a mix of thoughts + headcanons with a LOT of projection (potentially ooc) proofread but still shitty
LONG POST!
TW for suggestive themes and angst i mean...this is doomhead we're talking about
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- my backstory headcanons differ slightly from yours (please check out imeldas DH headcanons theyre great!);
- i think he came from a well-off family but was definitely abused and neglected. growing up in the time and place that he did, he had no support and was forced to take his future into his own hands. he probably ran away or estranged himself from his family as early as possible (possibly stealing a few stacks to keep him afloat)
- pre 31 he was most likely a petty criminal who got mixed up in some violence, possibly word got around and he was picked up by Father Murder (i imagine it the same way models are recruited on the street and thats funny)
- i agree that hes been in 31 since its conception, hes definitely the top dog, the most reliable and efficient Head out there. I'd like to think Father taught him a thing or two about hunting numbers down (and how to clean his messier kills) so younger/less experienced Heads definitely aim to be at least acknowledged by him
- i think doomie does many odd jobs just to pass time between 31 ; security at seedy bars, occasional plumbing/installation jobs etc. not only does it help with his small-time acting (being able to play and adapt to many roles) but it also allows him to slip into the background of the community. hes not too important but not too insignificant either
- i think the face paint and theatrics was his idea. i believe Father (and co) are just hardcore snuff/sadists and just wanted to see their victims in fear, but DH really took it upon himself to add character (and subsequently more fear) to his job! slay
- being involved with 31 and all, i think he has a few connections with organized criminals, especially considering he has to obtain fake IDs and alibis. hes grown quite friendly with a few respected mobsters and its rewarded him handsomely
- with all this said! i don't think hes some perfectly suave, totally composed Casanova, i believe hes really scared of feeling vulnerable and that makes it hard for him to form any relationships that arent superficial, simply because he doesnt know how to cope well with feeling exposed and emotional around others.
- i diagnose him with (gay) BPD and i think hes very insecure abt that fact. he was probably taught that his emotions were bad so he puts extensive effort into seeming composed and put together around people. one good thing about 31 is that its a space where his bizarre outbursts or even mania is not only accepted but embraced/rewarded so hes got that going for him i guess??
- i think, deep down, he'd really love a somewhat domestic relationship; having somebody at home to eat with, a partner he can rely on, to be cared for and care for someone else. hes a sap at heart, hes just very scared of showing it
- probably wouldn't want kids, even in an accidental knock-up, he'd slip his baby mama plenty of scratch and encourage her to find a man thatll support them. he can always be the distant but fatherly family friend but thats really it (UNLESS you're his s/o then thats a completely different story-)
- probably neurodivergent in some way, simply because i see him as incredibly observant, analytical and calculated when hes focused/interested, traits i typically see in other ND people lol
- my doomhead is definitely queer, he doesnt use labels but i see him spending time at drag shows (in the corner silently handing the queen a stack of cash LOL) at underground gay bars (and had a few fellas for company ykk😏) hes more than aware of the struggles of having no family to support you and needing to make ends meet no matter what (since hes been there himself) so he has respect for such folks
- hes SO committal, especially because he doesn't have many healthy long term relationships. hookups dont mean much to him and really just give him dopamine boosts during the lull of a lonely life (#bars). if you're his s/o, you're his life partner, he would kill and die for you 100%. even if you guys split he would probably just give up on relationships then and there (as sad as that sounds lmao)
- ik the movie is set in the 70s but in a modern setting, i think he'd listen to some quirky, creepy music. probably genres like glam rock and dark cabaret (think scissor sisters and the dresden dolls)
- on that topic!! some songs that remind me of him include
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chal-latte · 2 years
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y/i/n
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Liked by thecw and 1.389.200 others
y/i/n put these monkeys back in the zoo please!!!
tagged: @tchalamet @lilireinhart
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thecw when world crossed upside down
*Liked by @y/i/n
fanpage38 I MISSED THEM SM 😭😭😭😭😭😭
fanpage10 FINALLY THEY MEET AGAIN MY COMFORT PEOPLE
fanpage89 THEY GIVE OFF ONE BRAINCELL LEFT VIBES 😭😭😭😭😭😭
y/i/n fun fact they almost fell and broke their necks
↪️ pauline.chalamet i hope timothee learned a thing or two
↪️ y/i/n oh you rly wanna know what happened after that?
↪️ tchalamet @pauline.chalamet anything y/n say is denied rejected its false its a hoax its not true she’s exaggerating
↪️ pauline.chalamet @tchalamet certainly didnt look like that
↪️ y/i/n im now pauline’s (real) sibling you can fuck off @tchalamet
fanpage49 waiiiit y/n chalamet then???? 👀👀👀
fanpage40 Y/N CHALAMET ❤️
fanpage39 place date & time when?
maudeapatow i’ll gladly be the pastor☺️
↪️ y/i/n mauds…
↪️ maudeapatow you may now kiss the bride @tchalamet
↪️ tchalamet @maudeapatow no need to tell me twice
tchalamet tagged @y/i/n in a story!
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tchalamet shake that thang aye ayee
y/i/n
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Liked by tchalamet and 920.282 others
y/i/n ya know the vibe😉 new video up NOW!
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tchalamet they actually dont know the vibe
↪️ y/i/n im aggressively asking u to gtfo
↪️ tchalamet no tpwk no poke bowl
↪️ y/i/n DO U SEE IT NOW WHEN I TOLD U TIMOTHEE ABUSED UR MOTTO 😡😡😡😡 @harrystyles
*Liked by @harrystyles
fanpage40 i want what you & timmy have 🥺
fanpage36 it was long overdue mamas :( but im glad youre back!
↪️ y/i/n ik im sorry babes its been a packed month, hope you enjoy it 😘
fanpage49 y/n keeping us fed we love to see it
fanpage17 can u tell ur trick on how to be so calm all the time?
↪️ kjapa she carries a small ball, preferably a lemon, on set so if shes stressed or pissed she’d throw them at someone or something
↪️ y/i/n @kjapa YOURE MAKING IT LOOK LIKE ITS A BAD THING
fanpage19 so we shld just turn to violence in order to be calm all the time
↪️ fanpage20 NO😭😭😭😭😭
fanpage34 harry: tpwk y/n: tpwv (only when stressed)
hoooooyeony i miss you!
↪️ y/i/n i’ll ft u when im home <3
y/i/n
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Liked by hbomax, sydney_sweeney and 2.290.108 others
y/i/n did i just find… cassie’s blueprint?
tagged: @tchalamet
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sydney_sweeney he’s actually my double
*Liked by @y/i/n
tchalamet this picture is embarrassing i wont forgive u
↪️ y/i/n ill delete this ✌️
marcellrev this is so funny😭😭😭
fanpage88 not cassie😭😭😭
fanpage92 i’d pay trillions to see timothee play cassie
↪️ fanpage40 AND ETHAN- THAT THEATRE SCENE
donni.davy just a bit of glitter here and there and he’ll be perfect
↪️ y/i/n ugh so true!!! @hbomax @a24 thoughts???
↪️ hbomax @y/i/n thoughts are being thunken
euphoria 😭
fanpage60 WTFFF DO YALL SEE HBOMAX’S COMMENT???
fanpage77 DOES THAT MEAN???? THEYRE CONSIDERING TIMMY??????? FOR EUPHORIA?????
fanpage50 TIMOTHEE AND TOM HOLLAND IN EUPHORIA PLEASE FOR THE NEXT SEASON
tchalamet
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Liked by y/i/n, jacobelordi and 5.829.202 others
tchalamet you might not notice this but i like to count ur freckles when ur asleep and u seem to like it when i caress ur hair i wish u could see how precious you are
tagged: @y/i/n
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fanpage32 LET ME JUST- 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
devonleecarlson she owns my heart
fanpage66 IM SOBBING SO HARD RN
fanpage26 u guys are really soulmates huh
tomholland2013 cheers mates! 🖤
fanpage40 this to me when?
y/i/n timmm whats this for🥺🥺
↪️ tchalamet to remind you that love u and everything abt you that u dont like
↪️ y/i/n oh shut up☹️
fanpage82 she talked abt how she was insecure with her freckles in the cosmopolitan interview and this post made my heart melt🥺❤️
onwardwanna yall so cute
↪️ y/i/n baby bro🥺🥺🥺
maudeapatow kiss the bride! NOW!!!
jacobelordi america’s favorite lovebirds
fanpage31 MY HEART😭😭😭😭😭😭
fanpage90 maude is me. im maude.
fanpage66 and they say romance is dead
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falcqns · 2 years
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do you have any more flo shifting stories? or can you do dish the one about evans? sorry i get so intrested lmao
oh i have so many. heres some info abt her in my dr (nsfw and sfw):
loves having her hair pulled when she's down ... there
the best cook ever. it doesn't even have to be healthy. you say your favourite food and she'll make it for you. i mentioned once how i liked the Warm Cinnamon Roll and Lefou's Brew from Gaston's Tavern in Magic Kingdom and the next morning she made it for breakfast for me
her morning voice?? FuCk Me i love it so much.
cuddles with her?? immaculate. her boobs are so comfy
from one little to another: best Mama ever. so sweet and calming, makes homemade chicken nuggets, her bottles are amazing (if you drink them) and sings u to sleep 😭
nights with her are amazing. every night feels like a sleepover because her and i stay up too late talking and scrolling through tiktok and laughing like 12 year olds.
nsfw- can switch from sweet and soft to dominate in a millisecond. we ended up having sex on set a week after we admitted our feelings for each other because we were filming a scene where she had to grab my neck and slam me into a wall and i couldn't even hide how h0rny i was lmao.
she fits in with the fam so well. we ran into one of Mom's old teachers and she literally thought Flo was my sister because she looks more like Scarlett than i do apparently lmao (thanks Dad for giving me ur dark hair 😩)
her and Lizzo?? iconic. i talked her into making a tiktok account and her first tiktok was her duetting Lizzo aggressively teaching the dance to her song and she had the pout going and everything so she looked like a 5 year old in ballet class lmao it was so funny
she's amazing when i'm struggling mentally. has literally sat with me in the bathtub and washed my hair bc i couldn't do it myself
get her to play sims with you. i let her build a house once and it looked like a box with the square roof that doesn't go past the edges (cant think of the name rn rip). i showed her wicked whims and told her to hit the random button and the scream she let out was hilarious.
the little texts she sends me throughout the day :') in love w them. calls be darling, sweet heart, baby girl, my love. i love her sm.
yknow that scene in DWD where Harry is eating her out and she's basically writhing in pleasure?? insanely accurate. and it helps that she tastes amazing. def has an innocence kink which came up when i went down on her for the first time bc i didn't know what i was doing but she taught me what to do.
when she posts about me she's so sweet, and talks about me like im a piece of art or something and i adore her so much.
you're going to love her <3
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babysizedfics · 4 years
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Hey! So idk if you still wanted asks from that ask game you posted but I saw that no one asked about number 1. Is it a medical condition? I tried to look it up and it looked like a fainting thing maybe? Anyways I hope you're having a nice cozy day Bee. (:
Yeah im still doing the ask game for sure! it's a pretty good day thank u i hope urs is good!!
1. vee-sovagal syncope
ah look at that its projection o'clock
vasovagal syncope is when you faint as a result of an extreme emotional reaction - it can be in response to extreme fear, extreme upset, extreme excitement, anything really! your body shuts down from the intense emotion and your blood pressure and heart rate drop suddenly causing u to pass out
specifically i myself experience this when I get too overexcited and so now i'm forcing that onto vee lol
it happened to virgil a few times while he lived with janus and remus - though mainly it happened in his room since he didn't let himself show such extreme joy in front of anyone else, he was embarrassed to.
He kind of just thought it was standard, he got so so excited that he couldnt stop stimming and even his usual stims werent enough that he literally had to keep throwing himself on the bed like a rag doll then getting up and doing it again to expel the energy in his body - he assumed whenever he passed out it was because he's made himself dizzy from moving too much or because he was tired from the stimming
what actually happens is his brain gets so overloded by excitement that it struggles to process all of it and basically switches off so that it can give more attention to processing the emotion and less attention to keeping virgil conscious - literally windows error .exe
the light sides dont experience it firsthand until vee develops his special interest in sanrio characters
when vee is little he completely cannot hold back his emotions which is why he cries so much, but it also works for positive emotions! anytime he sees something that relates to sanrio he basically starts vibrating with excitement, he kicks his feet and shakes his hands and bounces in papas lap and starts verbal stimming with squeaks and squeals and its all very cute and amusing for the family
that is until logan starts to notice that if virgil is exposed to his special interest for too long while little he actually gets so overexcited that he becomes unable to express it enough through stimming and starts hyperventialting and shaking his head and whining apparebtly stressed by all the excitement
logan tries to subtly limit virgils exposure to sanrio while little, careful to make sure he only watches so much rilakkuma and kaoru or suggests he draws something besides hello kitty and pompompurin in his next drawing
but one time vee doesnt listen and logan really doesnt want to upset him by pushing it so he lets vee basically spend several hours listening to themes of sanrios shows and drawing characters and playing with his korilakkuma toy but it gets to the point where virgil is vibrating, breathing fast and shaking
and roman has become excited by all the sanrio stuff too because its cute and fun and he starts rambling about korilakkuma and kaoru and patton and roman think its so funny and cute how virgil is just getting more and more excited the more ro ralks abt it
until vee is at the point where he is breathing so fast its like hes ran a marathon and his hands are blurry with how fast he is flapping them and suddenly his smile drops and his hands freeze and he starts blinking slowly, left eye then right eye, and he starts swaying on the spot where hes sitting on the floor
he whines and falls backwards slowly and logan hurriedly drops to the floor to catch him before he bumps his head on the coffee table 'vee, baby whats wrong? can you tell mama if you feel sick?'
and vee is unresponsive except for the slow blinking and his eyes are not focussing they are moving around as if the world is spinning and he starts whining and tearing up - but before he starts crying logan feels him completely slump into his chest as his eyes fall shut
lo immediately starts a timer - IMPORTANT PSA if someone passes out start a timer and if theyre out for more than five minutes phone an ambulance!!
roman and patton PANIC because vee just PASSED OUT but logan reassures them that he is breathing much better now, his temperature is fine, his heart rate is a little fast but its slowing down to a normal rhythm - he explains vee is not ill and he realises that this is vasovagal syncope
vee does wake up soon - within 3 minutes - and he's back to being a calm sleepy clingy baby, but he is shaken up from passing out - they give him juice to bump his blood sugar and lots of calm attention and baby him loads (roman actually comes out of littlespace from his concern)
and yeah they are all gonna be super overprotective of vee for the rest of the week after this happens
i dont have much more, they just have to be very careful in the future to not overexcite vee like that again, he needs to be able to enjoy his Special Interest of course but they need to strike a good balance with it so it wont become unhealthy for him
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ingenves · 5 years
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     ok its ya girl back at it, same deal ! if u wanna plot just HMU or LIKE THIS and i’ll come to you ! wes is my father & u can peep his pinterest board HERE !
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     ⌈ chris pine, cismale, he/him ⌋ hey, is it WESLEY BIGELOW that you’re looking for? you know, the THIRTY-SIX year old CARPENTER. typically i see them hanging around GRISTOL DOCKS so you could try there! i hear they’ve been in living in PRINCETOWN for THIRTY-SIX YEARS. gristol wouldn’t be the same without them, right? anyway, whenever i see them they make me think of waking up before dawn, an old rowboat sitting in still water & a kitchen full of fresh produce.
tw: car accident & illness 
this mans has lived in town his entire life!!! his parents, william and rose bigelow owned a historic farm . willy & rose were high school sweethearts, a shotgun wedding joining them together after rose ended up pregnant with their first child at the age of 19. while rose’s parents were furious with their daughter for being so reckless, william’s father was more than happy to offer them a place to stay and lend a hand taking care of the baby that would soon be on the way.
despite the circumstances, wes was never treated as an accident or a mistake. he grew up in his grandpa’s farmhouse with a loving family. the bigelow family followed some pretty traditional gender roles. wes’ dad and his grandpa would wake at the crack of dawn and work out in the field until sunset while his mother hung around the house to take care of him, doing laundry, making dinner, taking him to the park, everything.
from a young age he was encouraged to help out on the farm but being the mama’s boy he was, he was far more eager to help his mom out with the cooking and the laundry. he was close with his grandfather as well, the two always working on little projects together like building a tree house, birdhouses, his own bee house………………….a lot of houses
but wes was never rly close with his father. william wasn’t much of an emotional or talkative guy, usually just sitting there in stern silence and working the day away. a bit of a scary guy despite not ever doing anything scary?? he’s just an ominous guy that doesn’t rly seem impressed by anything so wes never rly knew where he stood u know.
the one time wes ever really felt close to his father was when they would take little weekend fishing trips together, even though they didn’t really speak. just the fact that william took his time to teach wes how to do everything and didn’t get mad or frustrated when he lost a lure or let a fish go by accident was enough to like…..send the message. that was his way of showing his love u know.
the second bigelow child was welcomed when wes was a kid and while at first he was jealous that his new baby sister was getting all the attention, having a baby around the house was kind of fun. she’d make funny faces and funny noises and he grew to love her pretty quickly. he used to always say that his baby sister was the best thing that happened to him. when she got older, he taught her how to make mud pies and how to play pranks on grandpa who was a rly good sport, all things considered.
car accident & death tw !! the winter of ‘94 would prove to be the worst winter of wes’ entire life. on the way back home to pick up a christmas tree from a nearby farm, the family’s old pick up hit a patch of black ice and ended up flipped into a ditch. it was a bad wreck. luckily his grandpa and sister were safe at home during the time of the crash, but wes and his parents weren’t so lucky, his mother being the unluckiest of the bunch. they were stranded in the middle of the road for two hours before anyone showed up for help and by the time they arrived, it was too late for rose, who got the worst of the injuries. doa at the hospital while wes and his dad walked away with mostly minor injuries. that year, there was no christmas tree and no presents. christmas dinner was replaced with takeout and no one said a word.
illness & death tw !! not long after rose passed away, grandpa bigelow got some bad news. lung cancer that no one really saw coming. just a few months after the diagnosis they were having another funeral for another member of the bigelow clan.
it was a tough year, but they got through it. wes did his job to step up and do all the things his dad couldn’t do; all the things his mother taught him. he expected all of it to make his dad more closed off but it had the reverse effect and for the first time in his entire life, wes and his father had heart to heart conversations.
jump forward to high school and things finally felt like they were back to normal. william wasn’t dating yet but he wasn’t being all that anti-social, either.
wes discovered quickly he was the kind of person that other people liked and he was quite popular??? he made good grades, played football, dating the coolest girl in school (in his own opinion ofc), everything kind of fell into place for him in high school
and then after high school he…………didn’t rly know what to do asdj;fdksgfkdlj he never went to college and decided work around town doing odd jobs and saving some money so he could go off and travel and live his life as a young person craving adventure.
he was gone for abt a year or so before coming back home & he’s just been here ever since, doin his thing
started working with a family friend in his shop, doing what he loved and building things n working with his hands u know and hasn’t stopped doing what he loves ever since
he owns his own shop now & builds custom furniture 
the….personality section has Arrived
he’s quite the Charming guy but he talks WAY too much
definitely the kind of guy who will just…..talk about himself non-stop without even realizing it ?? he needs to get his Ego in check even after all these years smh
buT he’s very good at making conversation and is rly a friendly guy!!!! will talk and joke with anyone just because……why not ?? it makes his day when ppl talk to him so he will talk to u even if u dont feel the same way
highkey the kind of person to start up a random conversation w a stranger in the grocery story just because
lowkey uncomfortable with feelings and still isn’t super great at expressing emotions and his thoughts but ya boi is trying his best
but he’s rly good at picking up on signals. he can’t express his own emotions but he’s like….pretty in tune with other ppl
a very platonically affectionate guy. loves hugging his buddies and telling them how much he loves & appreciates them
and now for the lil extra tidbits
he’s got two dogs. a german shepherd named mulder & a pomeranian named scully sfddgfhgfg and he strategically uses his dogs to flirt w ladies when they’re out on a walk LMAO
he’s got a 6 year old daughter named aspen with a woman he is no longer dating ( im prob gna put this as a wc on the main so if u want this....hmu???? ) but they are still v close and spend a lot of time together & he loves aspen more than anything :’)
he’s very much a Dad. dad jokes all the time. endless shitty puns for everyonE
the man loves a turtleneck. he can’t keep his hands off a good ass sweater u know ??
he loves to cook and is v good at it, since he’s been cooking his entire life. he is the self-proclaimed kind of bbq and honestly???? he’s always throwing lil bbq parties & they are a hit :/  u know he be winning contests w his grilling bro
obviously.........a handyman. the house he lives in now, he built himself after tearing down the old on.  he built himself a nice big deck and everything so he can have a nice place to host bbqs and everyone will come compliment him on hard work and enjoy his fantastic recipes
he runs his own business building & selling furniture!!!! need a shelf installed??? give him a call. dog chewed up ur table leg??? give him a call. house burned down???? give him a call he’ll build u a new one.
what’s better than this ??????????? guys bein dudes
he rly likes going to the movies. lowkey loves disney but pretends he only cares bc his daughter likes it but……….u know he knows the words to every song
tragically heterosexual ://///////
he loves strong coffee & he loves beer & occasionally he loves a good book & a nice game of chess
did i mention he is such a dad bc………..he is such a dad
someone hold his rough sandpaper ass hands
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Jaden nd bastion for that domestic ask thing? >:3c
THE OTP YES i have so many feelings and everyone needs to hear me sob over the nerd baby and his superhero 
also that icon is the content i look for on this hellsite well done 
who is the big spoon/little spoon Jaden is the little spoon!! he prefers being the big spoon tbh he likes curling up against bastions fuckin ripped back but jaden always falls asleep first because he has to get this twelve hours or else he will be a grumpy boy but bastion?? bastion stays up all night drinking coffee and doing god knows what bc he’s the type of guy thats like ‘hey jaden im gonna go read a bit before i got to bed’ and then he fuckin stays up all night because he has no self control lmao so when it’s like 3am and he’s finally put down his book or finished dicking around on the computer he finally gets in bed and he doesnt want to wake up his husband (yes theyre married in my mind ok im love them) so he just lays down and pulls the human kuriboh to his chest and falls asleep 
what is their favorite non-sexual activity the standard answer is Card Games but besides dool masters they like to go on drives and look at stars and talk abt whatever. bastion is a chemical engineer and jaden’s his professional duelist trophy husband so they dont get to be together as much as they want bc jaden’s tournament schedule so when they’re together they gotta make it count u know so bastion will pick jaden up from the airport and they’ll just start driving out of the city talking about DM or what bastion’s been up to or whatever’s going through jaden’s mind (an enigma lmao) and then when there are no more streetlights to make it difficult to see the stars they’ll pull over and lay on the hood and cuddle and keep talking. it’s like 4am before they finally go home and since they’re going to sleep at the same time jaden finally gets his chance to be the big spoon 
who uses all the hot water in the morning getting jaden to shower is a fucking struggle he’s like a cat. living in the slifer dorm made him accustomed to being a generally gross person in general so he lives off dry shampoo and body spray so he doesn’t smell like hassleberry after a workout so that leaves bastion to take all of the water because he showers every morning after his run and insists on h is hair being perfect and well taken care of. like the guy has at least five different hair care products in the shower at all times while jaden, even though he’s dumb thick rich, buys that 3-in-1 crap he and syrus used to make stretch for a month back in college. jaden is also known to stick his kuriboh hair under the sink and shake it out like a dog because he is a gross boy that usually gets up about ten minutes before he has to leave so there’s no time for an actual shower and we’ve gotten away from the actual question but the tldr is bastion stands under the hot water he’s got one of those mirrors to shave in the shower while he’s doing his deep conditioning treatment and has a pore strip on his nose for beautiful ™ skin 
what they order from take out this one ties in a lot to my sageshipping BrOTP headcanons (on god there needs to be a brotp ask so i can scream to the world my love for bastion/alexis friendship) but the bit of background is that bastion and alexis would always order from this indian place that was open real late at night when they were in grad school together (no delivery at duel academy cause its an island u know) so it has a special place in his heart. jaden is a wimp when it comes to spice but since bastion loves it they order it anyway and the people that deliver the food know to make it wimpy baby spicy for jaden so he doesn’t end up sweating half his body weight up and crapping out lava four hours later 
what is the most trivial thing they fight over oh god they dont fight a lot because they love and appreciate each other’s eccentricities but if they’re going to fight its going to be over who’s doing the driving. they both love cars, bastion likes taking it apart and modifying them and whatnot and jaden likes the aesthetique (though his aesthetique is painting flames on a corolla jaden u lil shit smh) and they both like to go fast so when they go out they bitch abt who gets to drive. bastion tells jaden he doesnt appreciate the feel of the machine and jaden says bastion drives like a fucking old man so they end up settling the matter with rousing game of rock paper scissors 
who does most of the cleaning NEITHER OH MY GOD theyre both total slobs. bastion’s desk and home office is covered in his notebooks and duel monster cards, his walls covered with god knows what (formulas, dates, to-do lists, grocery lists) the guy just grabs the sharpie and starts writing because he’s afraid of forgetting something if he doesnt get it down right then. jaden lives in filth he has three day old bowls of cereal at his desk and uses used napkins as tissues he is certifiably NASTY. anyway they hire a housekeeper to make sure the entire house doesnt fall into disarray and she’s like their surrogate mother making sure they eat more than takeout and coffee and making sure the house smells nice. they call her Mama Cheryl (good middle aged mom name) and she’s the embarrassing mom at jadens local tournaments the kind that prints out huge pictures of his face and wears shirts with Neos on them and cheers for her boy v loudly. again we’re away from the question but i have a lot of headcanons abt this i’ll probs put in my dissertation lol 
what has a season pass in their DVR hmmm this is an interesting one…i like to think jaden loves crime shows because they’re heroes and he likes watching the good guys ™ win in the end. his favorite show is psych (which u all should watch its hilarious) but since that ended a while ago he’s been in to criminal minds and SVU because he likes watching the really diabolical criminals get caught. bastion never knew his mans was into such dark stuff until he opened the season pass thingy and got quite the heart attack because he thought jaden was all butterflies and flowers and funny stuff but bastion had to learn the duality of man the hard way. bastion doesn’t watch television that much but his guilty pleasure is vikings on the history channel and stuff on the discovery channel because he loves learning what a nerd 
who controls the netflix queue jaden is the one that likes to watch netflix the most but i wouldnt say he’s in control per se. they’re usually down for watching what each other likes but in the end jaden will sometimes end up superseding bastion because dammit bas we are not watching a documentary about the dead sea scrolls you dont even believe in god and bastions like fine youre cute we can watch Castle (even though thats not on netflix but i wish it were) 
who calls up the super/landlord when the heat’s not working jaden. jaden all the way. bastion brings up a a wikihow article about how to fix the hvac system and he’s like I CAN FIX THIS and jadens like ily babe but you work with chemicals not with this kind of thing ur gonna break it like the time u tried to fix the sink and fuckin clogged the shit out of it we are calling Cheryl and Cheryl’s like jaden im a housekeeper call someone who actually does this for a living. anyway while theyre waiting for the professionals to get there bastion tries to demonstrate he knows what he’s doing he is smort by writing the steps and shit on the wall and jadens like youre so cute but no dont touch the heating system. he has to distract his lil nerd by asking him about what deck he should use for his next tournament or what the probability of drawing three polymerizations on the first turn is and bastion loves talking about math so jaden keeps asking questions until the system is fixed (he doesnt remember much of bastions mathematical explanations but bastion looks so cute with his eyes all bright and shiny talking about statistics) 
who leaves their stuff around BOTH they are slobs. jadens a bit worse if we’re being honest because while bastion leaves his papers and cards around schmaden schmuki leaves his underwear and food and cups in the living room and is prone to stripping off his clothes for one reason or another and just laying on the couch watching ESPN with his goddamn pants on the floor and saying they were constricting his knees or some shit when bastion asks why he feels the need to be half naked all the time. bastion had his own room in college so he doesnt quite understand why jadens comfortable just answering the door with a trail of clothing behind him because most people that dont know him assume he’s been getting bizzay but nah he just be Like That
who remembers to buy the milk jaden do because he drinks milk in his coffee. bastion drinks it black so if theres no milk its like eh whatever but jaden is a mess without his caffeine and he hates how bitter and gross it is when theres no milk in it so even if jaden’s not the one going to the grocery store he’ll write it on the wall so bastion will remember it because his mans dont check his texts that often but anything on that wall he fuckin remembers and jaden doesnt understand why he be Like That 
who remembers anniversaries both! they are dumb thick in love with each other and they like to plan little things to do for the anniversary of their first date, when they made it official, their wedding, etc. jaden is much more extravagant and will do something like jump on the bed until bastion wakes up and then drag him out for breakfast and get atticus to sing a really off-key renditions of classic love songs and bastion blushes so hard and its so cute it should be criminal lmao. bastion will get jaden a cute little gift like one of those pictures where the artist takes a photo and paints it so they can hang it on their wall. or bastion will fine tune his duel disk or get him a new card for his deck. they are in big gay love and i love them so much 
thanks for this ask on god i just wrote 1800 words of tutorship feels i have a problem lol 
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eddiethehunted · 7 years
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so we definitely know about Madison (you guys are def an Iconic Duo), but who are some of your other tumblr friends? and what's something about each of them that you like/love? ❤︎
omg,, you’re right... madison and i truly are Iconic...
i’m super tired rn, but i’ll name off the first people who come to mind (and i’m so sorry for whoever i miss i promise i do love u)
@archangcl/@cooldadshiro - kayla has been my friend for literal years and i would lay down my life for her even tho she kinkshames me regularly (i have receipts on her too tho tbh)
@lmperio - cara and i are both emotionally unavailable cynical depressed binches and she hates everything i hate, she’s perfect???? also so cute 
@mama-kit - kit is honestly really hot and needs to Not think otherwise also deals with SO much shit but sitll keeps kickin.... luv kit
@miichiru - alena is super sweet and funny and never fails to make me feel 100% better when im down.
@kvincsky - i think i’ve known michelle even longer than i knew kayla??? but she’s so kind and SHE’S SO TALENTED TOO I CAN’T BELIEVE SHE EVEN LOOKS AT ME
@pctroclus - mal is such a bich and a furry but i love her to death i can’t wait to fight her irl
@legendarydragondefender - mia is a really good writer and she’s really nice and like super chill
@cryopods - SO GOOD AT GIFS?? AND SO ATTRACTIVE?? AMAZING
@starryiedd - katey...... is just as nasty and full of kinks as i am, i love her. she’s like one of my go-to’s when i have some kinda kinky shit to talk abt
@piningmarco - gwen UGH i’d die for u i love gwen s o much. their selfies are always super cute and i don’t feel nervous to talk to them abt ANYTHING
@hanceome - bex, the ultimate unproblematic fave, i can’t believe how chill bex is? she’s a cryptid
@dcrao - always sends me THE best things on snapchat but my phone hates me and crashes every single time. possibly bc mo is so Cool my phone can’t handle it :/
@alteanlance - lmao elyse i lvoe you so much i’m STILL laughing about that banana thing you told me, also ur way too cool for me tbhjdfh
@punkkeith - nat is THE chillest person in the world i think, also her baby is so cute i tear up every time she shows him to me 
@mccreesasshole - a walking meme. just saying. but i love u alec. but ur a meme
@sebastianfucker - JESS and i dont talk nearly as much as we should anymore (my fault lol) but she’s super hot and i love her so much
@juptiers - i have emma on my phone as ‘asami’ because she’s so perfect and strong and amazing
@clemntine - cant believe theres someone out there who wants to bone ghirahim as much as i do, shoutout to dakota the real mvp
@spacemcclain - kaz is honestly one of the nicest people i’ve met on here tbh
@bennylafitte - i guess wendy’s okay :/ (i’m kidding,,, i luv her)
@echoinglight - ECHO ugh echo is such a good writer and possibly the sweetest and cutest human bean in the world
@squishyspacenerd - squishy is actually 1,000 dogs and puns in a trenchcoat and i love that
@mikeyjcaboose - talented and cool and chill? a perfect combo. also a+ au’s 
okAY IM GONNA SHUT UP NOW SORRY IF I FORGOT ANYONE IMPORTANT 
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