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riverdale-retread · 3 years

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Riverdale S5 E8 Lock & Key

5 Things I loved/ 3 Things to Consider

I loved this:

1. THE KEY PARTY was excellent and ultra high stratospheric camp, that you can only appreciate if you really know the show. Achieving this tone- ‘this isn’t how things are but wouldn’t it be so amusing if it was?’ - is very difficult, and I felt rewarded for the close attention I’ve paid to the show. Further, at this sex party they have a heavily pregnant lady, and the only person who is in any way apprehensive that he might get paired with her is Reggie - everyone else is like, It’s fine. And also? The majority of the invitees have ALREADY had sex with each other, and almost all of them are also currently cohabitants and/or coworkers and/or doing joint projects, in various states of married, long-term relationship, casual hookup and courting. Just, absolute catnip I tell you!

Sidebar: Again CHADWICK FUCKING GECKO being SANE, and objecting to Veronica drawing Archie’s key with - NOT WITH YOUR EX. I mean, why does this always happen to me??? Why am I *Chad*?

2. I loved Betty in this episode. Just fell in love with her like I am flippin’ Jughead.

#1: Betty is so very sexy. Wow I was so not ready. Her in the FBI T shirt & him in fire fighter gear! Yeah it’s good looking people in actual Halloween costumes, but what makes it work is Betty's reaction - electrified, then amused and looking forward to a good time. Love this for grown Betty.

#2: Betty is so very wounded and vulnerable, and by her estimation lovers / boyfriends will never stand by her, but friends will. I love me a character in romantic anguish.

And related, #3, and yes, this may be wishful thinking, but there are hints that Betty actually feels the impact of what she did to Jughead and Veronica in her Senior year. Why else would Betty think that engaging in an actual adult romantic relationship with Archie for real will cause the light to go out and the haven bubble to collapse? Oh Betty. She’s so accepting about Archie abandoning her immediately after she told him she wasn’t mentally/emotionally well because she feels both ruined and like a ruinous force.

Finally #4, the kindness and care Betty shows to her mother, who does not deserve it, made me respect her a lot.

Sidebar to give Archie Andrews a Demerit: Betty has a single emotion in front of Archie (waking up from a trauma nightmare) and Archie (who woke up from a trauma nightmare first thing after the time jump) is just unwilling or unable to provide the necessary commitment. He in fact decides RIGHT THEN that Betty needing extra support (of the kind he needs, in fact) means Veronica is the answer. (Archie, please redeem yourself. Tell me what’s happening with you soon).

3. The only reason the high camp works though is because there’s a grounding in reality, with believable human emotions providing a solid foundation, and boy this episode really delivered!

The shaky breath Jughead lets out after he says Billy (character in the novel he’s teaching) might be crazy right after he sees MOTHMAN. Love this detail. The shame and pain Jughead goes through, writhing with his whole little face, while confessing that he’d been a reckless drug user and drinker to Tabitha, who sweetly feels some of that pain with him, was heartrending.

The ‘you are a jackass’ face that Archie makes at Chad while also SMILING (because that is how he looks handsomest) in reaction to Chad dude-bro-ing him with ‘females’ and ‘podunk town,’ without even bothering to reply to his dickhead question, is wonderful.

And most heartbreaking - Fangs’ laughter that presages a dawning realization that Kevin really intends to implode (his words) their whole life and his gentle tone in trying to figure out what the hell his boyfriend is doing was very upsetting and wonderful. Apparently, over the past 8 years, Fangs has been trying to give Kevin everything he wanted - monogamy, non monogamy, the baby, the marriage - only to have it go up in smoke.

4. Now that the characters are older, they can meet a wider array of adults and I really appreciate this - the expansion of the world of the show. Who knows if she appears again, but I very much liked this anthropology professor who has segued into creating a support group for the disturbed people she meets while she pursues her very esoteric interest in alien encounters. Minerva the campy lesbian art collector who wants an Original Cheryl Blossom and Rick the gay trucker who is like, the most sexually easy going man in the history of humanity are really fun additions too.

5. And this last one is going to sound mean spirited but I love what is happening to Alice Cooper. She was so horrendous and monstrous to both her daughters - I mean between Betty and Polly it’s really hard to tell who had it harder from Alice - and she is having to atone for the damage she did to her smart, resilient girls by the peril that Polly is now in. Polly, despite being born in Riverdale, could’ve been another Betty in terms of accomplishment - academic and career - but Alice just bashed her head in, basically, and now look where we are. So, suffer for your sins, Alice Cooper.

3 Things to Think About

a) Toni has “a medical condition that makes it harder for her to get pregnant the older she gets.” This is called BEING A HOMO SAPIEN. I was so amused by this that I actually looked up the production notes and this episode was written by a woman (!) and directed by another woman (!!) and the scene is acted out by two women (!!!) one of whom was actually pregnant at the time in real life (!!!!) so now I’m like, Wait, is Cheryl…an immortal? Is Cheryl somehow not 100% homo-sapien and that’s why Toni says this?

b) I gathered yet more evidence that Archie is a Riverdale-HS-Sexual. Archie is in the teacher lounge at Riverdale High talking remodelling plans with Veronica, who says she needs big changes, and he immediately switches into Let’s Fuck mode. When Jughead innocently asks what the blueprints are for, Archie TOTALLY acts like he got cockblocked.

c) The long pointy-nailed manicures on the lesbian couple’s fingers REALLY bother me. More than 20-something almost-perfect-SAT scorers Cheryl and Toni not understanding that human fertility wanes with age. I will just say that.

#riverdale positivity #riverdale s5

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kasunex · 7 years

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Yesterday me and @heiligelanze were bored so I made this trash complaining about P4. Don’t read if you like P4. Unless you are very chill about people hating on it.

we talk about why p4 is not good.

#1 - Boring characters

Yosuke: Wah wah small town is borin (why doesn't he just plan to move when he's older), also homophobic in way that suggests writers thought we were too. neck is too long. Also not closeted >:/

Yu Narukami: Stupid name, stupid design, stupid fuckin face, I hate him, no character arc or character at all, Gary Stu. Boring peice of shit. Also. Not GAY Enough >:/

Yukiko: Boring. Thinks she's trapped into being innkeeper when not at all. Never tells parents she doesn't want to or makes any attempt to change anything. Only other character trait is laughs (annoying)

Chie: Guyz I like kung fu n meat isnt that quirky, (bc apparently women don't like meat?????) also not gay or trans >:/

Kanji: Almost good. But misleads to think he is good representative media pushing artistic gay man strugling against stereotypes that gays rnt tough. Actually about gender roles but not well explored. Hinted to be bi at best. Atlus u fuckin cowards let me be gay for once >>>>>>>>>://////////////////

Rise: 2 kawaii. Gets annoying. Unwarranted, undeserved crush on main character you cant say no to. (But unlike p3 game doesn't make u with her but we will get to THAT LATER FUCKING P4G)

Naoto: Too good for game. Shoulda been trans tho.

Teddie: Remove or kill. Annoying af. Tries to steal ur girl. Major mysognist (game is like lol)

Mitsuo: Insulting to ugly people and to gamer fanbase

Moorako: Insulting to ugly people. Hahah who cares hes dead he was uggo lol

Hanako: Fat ppl r gross rite guys lollolollolllollolololollollololl haha she thinks she's atrratcievew lolololo fat pppl thinkin their hot lololololololo

Kashiwagi: She's old but busted except she looks 30 and treated as gross icky old woman when real teens would be like "I wanna bang dat shit on de desk"

Dojima: Ok I guess

Nanako: Emotional manipulation. doesn't die. unrealistically precious and mature.

Adachi: Presents as awkward relatable BUT NO ACTUALLY EVIL OVER THE TOP EVIL MUHAHAHA because he couldn't just be a cool guy with a darker side, had to be ANIME CRAZY EVIL DID IT FOR THE LULZ

Namatame: Not built up enough, comes fuckiin out of nowhere

Izanami: Comes even more da faq outta nowhere (GUYS THAT GAS STATION ATTENDENT SHAKING YOUR HAND OBVS EQUALS EVIL OR PLOT SIGNIFICANT LOL) also rips off Nyx and does it shitty

Ameno-Sagiri: Comes even MORE da faq outtta nowhere and vanishes da faq outta nowhere, also irrelevant to plot and meaningless distraction

Margret: Boring af, no personality at all, Elizabeth was more fun

Saki: Underdeveloped bitch, supposed to be so sad when dies despite not being shown for anythin but bitch also supposed to feel bad for yosuke when she dies even tho she hated him and he would have been rejected anyway seriously wtf

Marie: COMPLETELY IRREDEMABLE GARBAGE FIRE OF PANDERING TRASH. SHOEHORNED INTO PLOT WHEN COMPLETELY MEANINGLESS AND IRRELEVANT. GAME FORCES HER AS LOVE INTEREST WHEN SHE SOMEHOW MANAGES TO STEAL WORST GIRL FROM YUKIKO. ANNOYING TSUNDERE STEREOTYPE. MAKES ME WANT TO KILL SELF.

#2 - Shit plot

Boring af. Crappy tonal issues all the way thru. WAY TO SLICE OF LIFE WHO FUCKIN CARES.

HEY IM A TRANSFER STUDENT JUST LIKE LAST GAME LOL. Everyone loves me immediately even tho im a lil bitch.

Oh noes murder of some random chick we never met so sad ;~;

Meet Chie n Yukiko both boring af, immediately like me

Yosuke is trash can, Mitsuo is creppy and wierd b/c gamers r uggo and uggo ppl are socially inept and suck

Bitchy girl shows up and then dies

Yosuke does1n't get dick wet (he wouldn't anyways but still) so sad

See TV world, meet worst character in ORGINAL game (assult of bear puns)

fight dumb fuckin demon frog bc yosuke is bored (wtf is dis shit)

Chie is gay bUT NOT REALLY

Boss of dungeon is too hard, someone went missing or something idk who cares

Meet gay but nOT REALLY

Chases u bc u judge him but NOT REALLY

Gets kidnapped, gay dungeon bUT NOT REALLY actually about gender and cuz he likes cute stuff means he's gay STUPID but actually he's not because gays r icky lol

Campin time yaya the girls can't cook pffffft a WOMAN CANT COOK TF WOW WOW SO FUNNY A WOMAN CANT COOK WTF WHAT TEH FUCK and also HANAKO IS FAT AND That's' bad

HOMOPHOBIA TIME LOL KANJI IS GAY ARE YOSUKE AND YU SAFE IN A TENT WITH HIM? FIND OUT AT 11

Sexism next day when Yosuke is like I bought u girls sexy swimsuits and will now shame you to wear them ARENT I AN ENDEARING CHARACTER but no dicks are wet except with water (also vomit) including kanji lol abuse (also that could have seriously injured but never brought up BECAUSE ABUSE IS LOLOLOLOOLLOLLLOLLLLOLLLOLLLLLLLLOLLLL) Also game forced u/Yu to be sexist too fuck off game

Nanako is sad whatever who cares

Yosuke wants idol puss so yay idol but shes sad so we stalk guilible peepin tom who is the killer but NOT REALLY while adachi is quirky

Rise is sad that she doesnt know who she is or something fuckin idk STRIPPING TIME BOWCHICAWOWOW also teddie feels useless so everyone dies or smth

Teddie comes out of TV and is now human and annoying mother fucker, Rise is now not sad but KAWAII and Yosuke no longer wants idol puss idk but but IDOL PUSS WANTS BORING FUCKBOY YU DICK (not pandery at all, just your average sexy teen idol wants boring fuckboy)

Teacher is dead he was dick and uggo so who cares lol

Chase after uggo game lover nerd haha dungeon is nerdy game shit lol video games cause violence right guys? Didnt u know that video gamers are all ugly socially inept muderous pathetic freaks????? THATS U BTW UR UGGO INEPT MUDEROUS CREEPY LOSER FREAK LOL

Also rise cums when you kill enemies

Now murders are solved rite so lets have celebration!!!! Girls make omlettes but they CANT COOK LOL wasnt that so funny last time joke so nice they made it twice

Summer festival time Rise wants yu dick and Yosuke wants wet dick but teddie claims all three girls for himself and they go without protest despite not wanting to because they are STRONG FEMALE CHARACTERS WHO KNOW THEIR PLACE AND KNOW NOT TO BACKTALK THEIR MAN (isnt this game so progressive)

PERSONA 3 REFERENCES also underage drinking bUT NOT REALLY JUST SEXUAL HARASSMENT BECAUSE LOL also teddie stalks them lol also teacher books SEX HOTEL???? How wacky

You kno how muder was solved WELL NOT REALLY WHAT A SHOCK THE GAME HAD NO PLOT FOR LIKE TWO MONTHS anyways

Naoto is strong masculine manly mc man detective but gets kidnapped and is actuallY TRANS BUT NOT REALLY IS ACTUALLY JUST GIRL AND THINKS SHES CHILDISH OR SOMETHING but NOT REALLY ACTUALLY SHE’s JUST LONELY but not really idefk. Remember kiddies being different is okay!!! uwu (so long as you ARENT ACTUALLY DIFFERENT U FREAKOZOID kill urself)

Cultrue festival Rise wants u 2 do her in school halls balls deep but game doesn't let you????? lame 0/10

But then YOSUKE FORCES GIRLS INTO UNCOMFORTABLE beauty pagent that they cant back out of even if someone else signed them up under penalty of DEATH AND RAPE (I presume) because yosuke remains such an endearing character BUT THEN girls get revenge by forcing him into drag contest and u and kanji too even tho it was only yosuke because the GIRLS ARE SUCH AMAZING FRIENDS lol girls are objectified lol fatty thinks shes hot lolllollollooololooloololoollolololooll0lkooolloollololoololol (game designers had to stop in order to finish laughing at own jokes)

then drag contest ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww grosssssssssssssss icky teddie wins because................a dude? PASSING AS A WOMAN??????? Totes not transphobic vibes none at ALL

then HOT SPRINGS SLEEPOVER at inn because there is just SO MUCH MORE FUNNY TO BE HAD (isnt this all so relevant to plot and character??? rich narrative very necessary part of story, game would be UNSALVAGABLE without it)

Girls are bitches and think that guys are perving because hot springs doesn't tell them when it's time for girls to go? ?????? Great fuckin service amagi inn also why would the guys perv by just casually walking in??? Why why why why why qwhyw why why anyways they throw buckets at the guys and it's HILARIOUS and not at all uncomfortable, guys run away in terror and the girls are like YEAH GIRL POWER!!! Then they find out about mistake and apologize like good friends, people and normal humans would b/c even for pervin that was extra no just kidding LOL They actually keep it a secret becausE LOL GIRL POWER STRONG RELATABLE FEMALE CHARACTERS AMIRITE WHO HASNT ABUSED THEIR FRIENDS WITHOUT ANY FEELINGS OF REMORSE OR GUILT LOL (also nanako saw that all bad influence on child)

since the friendships are all so wholesome and not at all toxic or unhealthy the guys totally write this off and try to explain themselves to the girls. NO, actualyl, since Tedide and Yosuke are still such ENDEARING characters they instead decide to molest girls in sleep RELATABLE but uh oh they accidentally molest fatty and uggo old teacher who looks 30 and then fatty and teach are like cool let's fuck and like REAL TEENS they are grossed out at being offered sex because yuck women over 20 and fatty also why are fatty and "old" lady hangin out anyway?? Apparently if ur gross u hang out together, b/c that's how it works rite. such grea t non contrivences

Nanako is dying whatever who cares

Namatame then kidnapps nanako or somth who cares dojima dies but NOT REALLY

then they go to heaven because nanako is sad but nobody gave a shit narukami never cared to ask or try to keep her company isn't he just so GREAT and considerate to the girl being boderline abused and neglected in his own fuckin house no who cares BUT NOW WE CARE RIGHT GUYS

Namatame is cray cray and his boss design is uggo and bullshit

Nanako dies, Yosuke advocates MURDER because he is still SO ENDEARING and player has to chose EXACT FUCKIN DIOLOGUE WITH NOT ONE MISTAKE OR EVERYTHIGN SUCKS AND ITS ALL UR FAULT also in some endings you murder because fuck you

but then if u dont murder NANAKO WAS DEAD BUT NOT REALLY but only if u dont murder so congrats u were emotionally manipulated into killing the mentally ill b/c ur so great good job

then it turns out Namatame you know how he was cray cray well turns out he wANST REALLY CRAY he just had plot-convient-tempo-insanity-itius as the doctors call it then u talk to him and u know how he was the killer? Welll...NOT REALLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY he was actually good guy u almost killed innocent man fck u then u have three chances to guess killer and only u can and if you dont get it in three guesses you get, as the doctors call it, plot-convient-stupid-cant-think-anymore-itius and thus you run out of time and nobody in the world can guess except you and even over the next three months nobody can guess because who cares I guess lol 2 ppl r dead it turns out you know quirky relatable cop man well NOT FUCKIN REALLY he is actually crazy because he's bored and as everyone knows when youre bored you kill also he's sad that he doesn't have talent even tho he is sucessful detective???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? then god bullshit end of world or smth who cares

then everything is over also i forgot teddie disappears so sad but NOT REALLY

Christmas eve sex ( i banged rise on top of christmas cake)

Girls can now cook character development girls learned how to cook 10/10 v progressive

Then flash forward to three months later because fuck you and Yu is leavin because idk and the game ends BUT NOT REALLY ashkually you can get TRUE SUPER AWESOME ending if you are able to figure out that you have to go to junes for no reason except fuck you

turns out the gas station attendent u know him? well he was super bored and he's actually a GOD WOWZERS so amazing did you know jesus was a part timer at a gas station????? NO??? That's why youre playing this sack of shit anyway humanity wants ignorance or so god says (sound familiar, Nyx??) and she almost wins BUT NOT REALLY Because yu has the power of frienship and you know that awesome scene of makoto fighting nyx? Well imagine thaT BUT SHIT b/c no buildup

for all ur xtra efforts u get teddie saying hearts are connected anime KH cliche (wasnt that so worth the extra bullshit dungeon)

Yu is leaving SO SAD WHAT ARE YOU CRYING ABOUT P3 WUSS CAST? Your friend is dead? GTFO with those 1st world problems NARUKAMI HAS TO TAKE THE TRAIN TO SEE HIS FRIENDS THIS IS THE TRUE TRAGIC DRAMA WHAT COULD BE WORSE

THE END 0/10000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

#3 - ASSULT OF THE CASH COWS

so p4 is gr8 rite m8? well no but apparentlly dumb 14yr old boys were like "omg this game half akcnowleges gays exsist so PROGRESSIVE also i can fuck mai waifu n have friends" and so p4 made a shit ton of money atlus saw dis money printin out and were like $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! so dey were lyke "lets release a buncha shit”

Persona 4 The Animation: Imagine the same shitty p4 plot but with EVEN MORE HOMOPHOBIA!!!!! also racism!!!! plus MORE FAT JOKES!!!!!!!!!!! Hahahaahahahahah also the animation is piss poor shit!!! Doesn't this sound wonderful?????

Persona 4 Arena: So Atlus was lyke yannao wat totes goes with our super serious and super "mature" jrpg seriess? Do u kno? BLAZBLUE!!!!! The over the top weeb fighting game!!! YEah son!!!!! So anyways a fighting game comes out with barely any playable characters??????? Great. Fantastic not the least bit fanficy character writing. Also, there is a plot b/c dis shit be canon. Dats right!!! Now you may be thinking "mmmm how does that work????" well the geneiuses at atlus say "B/C SHITTY P3 RETCON CHARACTER IS SAD ABOUT DESTROYING FRINEDS WHOLE TV WORLD BECOMES ARENA WERE PEOPLE HAVE TO FIGHT FRIENDS" and u may hear that and wonder?? "what deh fuck, wasn't tv world gone also when did this ever happen in p4????" to which fanboys proply accuse u of hating fighting games and behead u.

So at this point in time, P4 is offically dead. It is dead as doornails. but atlus is lyke "Hey let's rape the corpse" and they release shitty remake on overpriced shit system nobody bought. You may be wondering "2012 didn't p4 only come out less than five years ago????" to which atlus says "shut the fuck up and give us money" hence P4 Golden

Persona 4 Golden: Added marie, inistant failure trashfire BUT WAIT!!!! THERE IS SO MUCH MORE!!!! Added events!!!

a) Yosuke wants dick wet and will cum if he feels boobs on his back!! So Yu and Yosuke team up to get shitty dumb ugly bikes b/c they're sooooo cooool rite mitsuru? You and ur dumb motorbike p4 is the real mature game. Anyway. Then they go hit on girls and yosuke gets one!!! YAY!! BUT OH NO!!! IT'S ACTUALLY STUPID FATSO STILL THINKIN SHE'S HOT WHEN SHE'S ACTUALLY STUPID BC SHE'S FAT!!! She then sits on yosuke's bike and it breaks because lol shes fat get it get it get it get it????? Doesn't this add so much to the story??? RICH NARATIVE RIGHT GUYS?!

b) BEACH TIME!!! Because that's where the real compelling drama is!!! Anyway they go to the beach and yuckerbears kanji is in a speedo!!! Gross!! I hope yosuke doesn't catch the gay!!! Then teddie tries to molest the girls bc he's such an endearing character lol then kanji's bathing suit falls off!!!! How did this happen u may ask?? ANIME MAGIC!! So then they dress kanji in seaweed like birth of venus and girls scream and run. the end.

c) Fireworks festival yay time ted-fiya so memorable. Yosuke wants to murder Teddie bc PORN so funny haha more fat jokes also teddie wants 2 bang nanako

d) Nanako is sad again whatever who cares

e) Halloween party!!! BUT NOT REALLY!!

f) SKIING TRIP!!!! YAY!!! P3 REFERENCES!!! YAY!!! Shiptease!!! Yay!!! Teddie steals food so Naoto advocates for his MURDER!!! YAY!! IF YOU DID MARIES SLINK YOU GET XTRA AWESOME DUNGEON!! ALSO IMPLIED RAPEY SEX IN THE SNOW BUT NOT REALLY!!! ANYWAY turns out that marie sucked up the ameno sagiri fog! What u thought it just went away on its own?? BULLSHIT!!!! Next you'll be questioning the ever so important role of NPC John Smith in creating Izanami's gas attendent disguise. Or NPC Billy Bob in giving Ameno Saigiri directions to the boss fight. RIVETING DIOLAUGE LIKE "is this like the part in movies where the bad guys lair collapses??????" WORST GIRL IS DEAD BE SAD EVERYONE ELSE IS U MONSTER!!! BUT NOT REALLY!!! INSTEAD SHIP FUEL!!!! Also marie is polite for half second, AMAZES ENTIRE CAST GREAT WRITING!!!!!!!!! dont u love it when ur friends treat u like shit? then there’s a lovely scene where the dudes perv on the girls who are sexaulized and marie attacks them. Riveting. Then they all died and we were all happy.

g) New years eve. That is all. also new stupid persona evolutions that look stupid.

h) Valentine's DAY!!! I bang Rise on the da beach!!! Also if u slink with marie at all she forces you to cheat!!!! YAY!!!!!!!!

i) OH, NO! Yosuke is going to have to move maybe idk wasnt he supposed to want to move??? idk shut up. anyways. to keep yosuke miserable his friends have to become a band in TWO DAYS!!!! How will they ever do that??? well guess what with zero experience the entire group becomes master musicians in TWO DAYS!!!!!!! That's right, it's that easy!!!! U 2 can become as good as Green Day in two Days!!!! not that they ever play again lol or ever bring this up again lol. Then the dudes jump into the crowd and lol the crowd dodges thme aand nothing is accomplished.

j) New super awesome epilogue you only get if you slink marie even tho she isn’t there for 90% of it whatever the new designs suck

Anyway since the game isn't slice of life enough you can now bang rise in the movies and the hot springs also you can go out at night so exciting.

You can now force Naoto into sexy outfits against her will because isn’t it so cute when girls don’t like being objectified??? Also they molest her at the hot springs??? Also

So yeah P4G sucks ass. But ATLUS didn't stop there!!!! OH no! Atlus then went on to make Persone Q!!! They decided this time to drag innocent bystander P3 as well!!

Persona Q: some bullshit about a dying girl causes the P3 and P4 cast to meet in a wonderful culture festival crossover!! With lovely gameplay and no regression in character!! Chie always had nothing to her past loving meat right????? Also yu can fuck the dog from p3!! isnt this so believable and not the least bit stupid or contrived? isn't it?? Isn't it???????? Not much to say its just dumb surely Atlus must be done now right?? RIGHT?? WRONG!!!!!!

Now you see since P4G came out, OBVIOUSLY the anime needs to be partially remade! You may be asking, isn't the anime less than TWO YEARS old at this point? Why remake it? Did golden really have such a different story? No.

P4 Golden Animation: Marie, marie, marie, marie, ten episodes of marie, never goes anywhere, confusing and boring af but look 16 yr olds in bikinis and nude and not totally shit animation so it's ok right? RIGHT? RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! P4 at this point has been raped to death all over again and the corpse is still being fucked and they won't just let it die. BUT NO!!!! Enter p4 arena ultimax!!

P4 Arena Ultimax: B/c the first was so great, they made another!! Game so nice they made it twice!! but now the dark hour from p3 is back because idk we ran out of ideas. Also junpei and koromaru and adachi great. But guess what!!!!!! AWESOME NEW CHARACTER!! His name is sho!! He is the secret son of dude from P3, how is this possible? fuck you. Anyway he is so tragic and sad he hates friendship!! awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!! :((((( But never fear!!! The p4 team will show sho the glory of frienship isnt this so interesting and original and great????

p4's violated, torn up corspe now has zero dignity left so atlus decided to reanimate the corpse with dead horse dildos and force it to dance

P4 DAN: Dancing. Shit dancing. Nobody knows how to dance. Remember how P4 used to be about murder and accepting uncomfortable truths???? Well now its about shittily animated dances. Isn't this so great? Guess what we lean about the characters? We learn that they can't fuckin dance and watching them is cringy af. Also now the tv world is a dance stage because the tv world just does whatever the fuck we want it to. what if a characters shadow is a rapist, would they be forced to rape?? is that how atlus would make a porn game?? if we wanted to make a chess game a famous chess player who feels forced to play chess will then make u forced to play chess. .... so obivously, the P4 fandom realized that Atlus was raping their game and refused to buy it right?? RIGHT??? WRONG. They actually will castrate you with a rusty carving knife if you ever so much as imply P4 is a cash cow.

It totally is tho

#Persona 4 #Persona 4 Hate #Kasu.txt #rape mention

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ssaalexblake · 7 years

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major MAJOR SPOILERS for wonde rwoman ahead like proceed at ur own risk i basically just liveblogged the movie from memory SPOILERS

okay like i did not expect my first thought of this movie to be ‘wow i love bruce wayne’ and yet...

the thoughtful bat bastard

also i had no idea robin wright was in this movie and after 2 days of seeing house of cards gifsets of claire underwood being shady af it was jarring.

tho also like... THANK YOU for having a good age range on the amazonians??? like, normally a movie involving an paradise like island only populated by women will have nobody over the age of what, 23?? they didn’t even photoshop out any signs of age!!!! Age diversity isn’t something we talk about a lot, but it’s important too.

oh and i don’t know /much/ about armour but it came across to me as functional, true to the comics but not sexualised either so A+

smug diana’s face when she was told she wouldn’t wield the god killer lol

also, i liked the way they filmed the fight sequences? It was clear what was going on, but where it included the slowmo and almost snapshots of the scene it had a real comic book feel to it.

kinda confused as to where the big boats went tbh but?? okay. I like Steve.

also his entire reaction to the whole laso thing was priceless poor dude

also i know this wasn’t a direct inversion or anything, but /thank you/ for none of this ‘born sexy yesterday’ nonesense!!!! Steve! is the one undressed in front of her (and she doesn’t give a fuck,and that, unlike the women, was sexualised) b/c she’s... Not naive! She’s naive about humanity in general and those with bad intentions, but they didn’t fall into the sexually naive trope trap. Sure, she’d never seen a dude before, much less a naked one, but like... she’s read all 12 volumes on pleasure and while men are required for reproduction... they’re not necessary for the pleasure part.

side bar: i’m feeling very gay today and thanks for the implication there.

i also appreciated the nods to the traditional hero story in this, because this movie follows the formula of all the others, but it is inherently feminine instead. But Diana is just as equal as the men, and she has the journey, too.

small note, when they ride to the boats to go to London i sniggered so loud at Steve getting the white horse. She got the black horse, he got the white horse. No damsel in distress on a beautiful white stallion here.

‘it’s just rude to /assume/ i can sleep with you!’ ‘you want me to sleep with you??? ok i will’ gfhrthtrgteger that was such a nice sequence again, actively /because/ she was not naive!!! she was just not knowledgeable of western societal expectations!!! 2 different things.

diana’s reaction to seeing the baby!!!! such a cute tiny moment

also looollll at the fashion scene like, i feel u, u can’t fight in those skirts

also, when she met Etta i was struck that we’d had a whole first part of the movie with only ladies!!! b/c like, normally that’d be all you’d get, just diana and etta barely talking but no!!! they related to each other and got on and were not the only women!

also, the perspective of the movie from a female standpoint, i was far less bothered by the portrayals of the sexism. Sometimes, when you’re watching a dude centric thing, and it’s set in the 40′s or 50′s and it’s super sexist, it can feel like the focus is more on getting to portray a woman’s hurt at being subjected to sexism is the point, rather than showing how fucked up it is, like, you can practically feel them enjoying the power trip, but being in Diana’s shoes, this movie being female directed, made it about her fury and shock at being excluded. Perspective matters, apparently.

her yelling at the generals in respect of claire underwood i love her (idr her character name sorry)

and fhgfiigjfjgfj her immediate reaction to her comrades l o l ‘at least he can punch’ ‘no not him’

'his people’ possibly the best line in the movie, i will reblog the posts about it when they get here

diana’s utter heartbreak the whole way through at it not being simple, that she can’t stop and save and help everyone, her in the trenches was rough.

and then she decides that actually, nah, i am gonna save people. at least these ones.

the SHOT THE SHOT /the/ superhero shot. Her taking her hair down, her turning and being full gear, her climbing up into no man’s land, just... this was a major cry part

aaaand the sniper! Look, Steve looking at the situation, nobody judging mr scotsman for not being able to take the shot, and Steve thinking back to how he saw diana and her people fight, and engineering a situation that he knows she will do well in!! he A) paid close attention to the first fight and B) is without ego catering the situation to aid her to finish the job

i too would stand and applaud and shake her hand lol

tho i /did/ find it weird they were shaking her hand, i thought the double cheek kiss thing would have been more like, accurate.

side note: i kicked myself, literally, in the cinema for shipping steve and diana so much because i knew how it had to end and yet, there i was, shipping the fuck outta them. That was /before/ he went back into the room with her, when i thought ‘hey maaaaybe they’ll be nice’ but NOPE then that happened and i was ‘they’re doomed.’.

definitely not /necessary/ but like... occasionally they can be useful.

also her slowly learning more about her companions as people and finding their value and heart was??? they were traumatised and messes and she found the heart and i love her so much

anyways the scenes in the gala hurt me, tho like, her DRESS, even aside from it being beautiful, it was not sexualised but still made her the person who stood out the most in the whole room, somebody tell male movie makers that colour can achieve what excess cleavage does 5x easier and more effectively than the latter.

she’s just... she’s really naive about humanity in general, and the narrative doesn’t demonise her for it and she learns and it obviously hurts steve b/c he wants it to be true. he so clearly longs for her way of thinking, but he knows it’s not true, and he knows she’s going to find out and that was a warning to the audience but it still hurt.

the village :(

i think i’m gonna be perpetually hurt by her reaction when she realised her killing the dude did nothing. Always gonna sting.

and THE WATCH, the watch ‘he lets order him around’ just a watch. He gives her the watch, of everything, the watch. And she goes on to do what he does, what he believes, she goes on to love like he does, she does what the watch tells her, kinda. that one kicked me in the feelings. the fucking pocket watch gdi.

me, the whole way through the movie: don’t kill Chief don’t kill Chief and thank youfor not being awful for once

‘i can save these people but you can save the world, it has to be me’ i’m sobbing friends she can save the fucking world

(side note: steve was treated well and respected for his role in this move but when u swap it, where the man is the hero and the woman is the backup, women rarely get that courtesy, and every man complaining about steve being a sidekick love interest can be /told/ we rarely ever get the amount of respect story wise he was shown.)

she a fucking demi-god babes and she is totally okay with Fratricide so watch the fuck out ~my girl

btw the photo killed me the whole way through just fyi

and i /had/ forgotten till she touched his face on the billboard.

and then my love for bruce way back when at the beginning of the movie hit even higher b/c i now understood exactly HOW much that photo meant to her, and that idiot melodramatic bat dude spent the time tracking down the original photo just to send it to her.

no other motivation, it was, as she said, a choice to be loving. This movie has made me emotional about Bruce and Clark in BVS lol.

i’m just really choked up about this one i gotta cry a little more nvm

#rrhrhrth #ryhrth #fgerrgteh #wdfgegrerg #rffgtrhetg #gethetg #danni retroactively liveblogs wonder woman #this is A MESS but i needed to rant #spoilers #wonder woman spoilers #wonderwoman spoilers

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