#Dudley/Dudz

[cryptidofthekeys]

Dudz aka my ISWM OC but re-done

So uh yeah I re-did this fucker,, bc I just didn’t like the old description- It wasn’t spaced out enough and just- annoying to look at-

I’m much prouder of this dude now

TWs: Cannibalism, Injury, Death, and Vomiting are kinda mentioned here

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| Real Name: Chase Dudley Blackwell

| Nicknames: C, Dudz, or Cryptid

| Title: The Arnston Forest Huntsman sometimes called The Rabid Huntsman (considering the name Chase means ‘the huntsman/huntsman’ I figured it’d be fitting here)

| Gender: Trans FTM (He/Him)

| Age: Mid 30s/40s

| Height: 7’3”

| Species/Race: Human but he’s god VERY inhuman strength

| Occupation: …Not really an occupation LMAO- but he’s a Murderer essentially, a cannibal for more specifics!

| Eye Color: Baby Blue (REALLY dark circles underneath his eyes)

| Hair Color: Black (his hair is just frazzled, messy as hell, hasn’t been brushed in years and it’d hang completely over his face if not for Murdock insisting he pin it back with a man bun or ponytail)

| Weapon of Choice: His favorite weapon is his large ax (aka Ax Big) second is just a butcher’s knife

| Skin Color/Body Type: He’s extremely pale and fat (big large and w i d e frame man)

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| Appearance: Dudley’s main outfit is a black apron that’s torn up and dirty in many places (he usually just keeps it on since he’s constantly going and getting more victims to consume), he wears a dark purple turtleneck sweater underneath it, gray jeans that are also ripped up and his outfit is pretty much covered in blood.

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He has black combat boots with purple laces in them, he thinks it looks nice ok? A killer can have aesthetics too-

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He wears a black bull mask over his face as well, he wears black gauges in his ears, he doesn’t have pointed ears or anything like that but he does have two sets of fangs, he also has black n purple painted nails too (it looks terrible, he’s not good at it at all) and he has a circle beard.

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And he has TONS of scars like ALL over his body, there’s too many to count or name he’s got so many, most of them look like they were from past struggles essentially (aka victims fighting back and some of them got pretty fuckin n a s t y with him)

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And those scars were caused by all sortsa things, like some were bullets, some were stab wounds, some were burn marks, etc- That’s actually one of the reasons he wears the mask over his face.

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He made it himself out of a bull skull that he painted black in the end, the most prominent scarring is the burn marks covering his face, hence the mask he wears.

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| Personality: I was gonna skip this again but fuck it, okay he’s a sadistic bastard likewise, that much won’t change, he’s a goddamn menace who takes pleasure in hurting and or killing others, he v much loves eating humans- He’s a disgusting bastard-

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He’s still very selectively mute and doesn’t much care for talking even then (the most he’s ever talked to someone was his dad, Stan The Water Man, not even Murdock has heard him speak that much) that’s the only silent thing about him though.

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He’s a HUGE dude so he’s going to make a lot of noise otherwise but that’s besides the point, he’s cruel, evil, and very dangerous- that’s short, straight and to the point as I can get it-

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| Side Facts: Okay so first up is how Dudz n Murdock met and instead of giving a mini-fic, Imma keep this as short as I can- (newsflash its not short) First and foremost- Dudz is kinda a notorious killer, especially around the Arnston Forest area, not many people stay around Arnston these days.

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Because of all the murders that happened, they ESPECIALLY actively avoid the forest like wildfire …But hey you always have your idiots who’ll go exploring in places they shouldn’t, yeah those idiots haven’t came back either.

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But basically, Dudz met Murdock after one of his own victims escaped and ran into the forest (unknowingly mind you)- Dudz was out just patrolling around, seeing if anyone wandered in when he heard one of his traps go off nearby.

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He had his ax with him and headed that way and sure enough, he found a person there …They were pretty marked up already, more so than just the bear trap, in fact those were… Stab wounds? …Oh well either way

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Of course they screamed at the sight of Dudley which only made him exhale deeply through his nose, he wasted little time in picking them up by the head (with one hand mind you, I’m not joking when I say he’s HUGE and inhumanly strong)

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He practically tore them from the trap, their uh poor leg getting left behind unfortunately which only caused them to scream and cry louder, which he was getting annoyed at (...there is a sense of sadistic satisfaction)

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But he just h a t e s the… the l o u d… Too loud, it's too loud but he doesn’t have time to uh…

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Deal with that right now so- He just swings them over his shoulder (Murdock had caught up btw, I forgot fgjdklgfjdfs, he’s been watching in the bushes and he saw Dudz pick them up by their head and rip them from the trap with o n e hand)

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Murdock would usually be angry at someone for stealing a kill from him …But this time? Oh no… He was actually mildly curious so he followed behind at a distance, being careful as to not be seen or anything.

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And the whole thing goes as, Dudz takes them back to his dusty crusty old cabin he stays hidden out in when he’s not visiting his dad- And he chops them up and prepares a meal n such as that-

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Murdock is watching through the window and that’s when it strikes him- Cause this guy seemed familiar already but he just couldn’t put his finger on it (there are wanted posters of him after all)

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This was that cannibal the news n things had been talking about! …And oh man… Murdz was SUCH a fan, sure, okay, yeah- don’t get him wrong, cannibalism? Not his schtick, he would never- But this killer… Just, oh m a n-

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…As Dudley is preparing the meal, Murdock notices- the guy’s setting out… Two plates? …Is he expecting someone and then he sees Dudz grab his ax and suddenly whip his head around to the window Murdz was in.

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The two locking eyes right then and there (I said this was going to be short and straight to the point psh, since when can I ever?) But uh I’ll… Try to wrap it up- Anyways- Dudley motions for Murdock to step in and to his surprise he does, he figured the other would run.

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Then he notices the bloodied knife Murdz is carrying, and then he blinks slowly (almost like a frog blink) ah, so that’s why the victim was already pre-stabbed… Makes sense.

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Murdock tries to ease the tension down because he can tell Dudz is a bit ‘trigger’ happy with his ax right now and on high alert, just tries his smooth talk, puts his weapon away and then to his surprise Dudz puts his down.

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…Murdz does uh the talking since Dudley doesn’t, well, ya know- Tells him that he’s actually a big fan which Dudz tilts his head at, he looks… Bemused if anything upon hearing that- A… Fan…? Of his work?

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Murdock explains that he’s heard many things about The Arnston Forest Huntsman or… The Rabid Huntsman, whatever he prefers- Which is when Dudz announces his name/nickname which seems to startle Murdz, like o h damn- he CAN talk- okay

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“...Got’cha, Dudz…” And then Murdock introduces himself and Dudz seems to perk up at that name, and it's clear that he knows who Murdock is …And okay he’s not- gonna fanboy rn-

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Although Dudz can see the excitement in his face ….hmm… Cute… And then it goes from there, Murdock makes a deal with Dudz bc he’s also on the run too, the two could use each other’s help- even though Dudley seems to be the loner type …Surprisingly he agrees.

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The two seal the deal by having a meal together, despite Murdz attempts to get out of it bc o-oh no I don’t eat hu- …Dudz’s death glare and heavy breathing was enough, he sat down and tried it (he didn’t tell Dudley but he threw up within the hour)

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…Dudley was none the wiser and VERY pleased Murdock liked his meal so well- And so they kinda just, hit it off from there essentially-

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Dudz finds Murdock to be very annoying at times with all the scheming and planning, he h a t e s all this talking and shit- So Dudz just d o e s, he’s the brawns more so than the brains- He just wants f o o d, he’s definitely by no means smart, he’s a dummy-

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Murdock is genuinely surprised that Dudley hasn’t gotten caught yet with how reckless and dumb he can be but eh surprise surprise- Despite the two seemingly hating each other on the outside, looking to constantly get on each other’s nerves.

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Deep down, they are very close, Dudley is genuinely overprotective of Murdock- He’d lay down his own life to protect the other, and Murdz would do the same to Dudz- They do love n care for each other deep down a l o t …Also they’re gay for one ano-

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Dudley despite most his meals involving human, is a TERRIFIC cook and he’s a very excellent baker as well, sometimes he’ll be lazier and not go out hunting humans- Sometimes he’ll actually just fix normal food-

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He’s got a HUGE sweet tooth and is HEAVILY motivated by candy, probably a way you could survive (...yeah ya know what I’m getting at here) if he smells candy on you, he’ll lower his weapon and just start drooling all over you.

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Murdz has used the candy motivator many times on Dudley to get him to do something he needed or to follow along with the plans he’s made, literally if you throw the candy- Dudley will get down on all fours and run at it like a dog.

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…Murdz has also been pounced on and nearly had his bones crushed because of said candy motivator tactic but AHEM besides the point.

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Dudley would… NOT give great hugs- I don’t care how soft he is- …I’m not saying you CAN’T hug him- oh no, I would never- But he’d either crush your spine or he’d just take a bite out of you, either one really- …Even if you give him candy, your gonna get crushed-

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The only one he’s TRULY and fully gentle with is his dad, Stan- Stan The Water Man.

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Lemme be clear he isn't super rough or careless with Murdock, he’s kinda gentle with him but not as much as he is with someone like Stan bc he knows Murdz isn't AS fragile in a weird sorta way.

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NOW- Speaking of Stan- likewise, Dudley isn’t related by blood to Stan oh no no- BUT- Stan adopted Dudley, now sure… He is a… Grown man but it just looked like Dudz could use a father figure in his life at the very least bc to Stan he didn’t seem to be doing much-

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And also when Stan called him ‘sport’ ‘champ’ and stuff like that it seemed to make him c r y- at first Stan thought he had offended him or upset him but Dudley slowly explained, even switching to sign language when his throat was giving out.

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It went fairly normally, although the adoption wasn’t uh set in a legal setting- …It couldn’t be because for some reason unbeknownst to Stan- Dudley didn’t want uh to go anywhere where like cops n shit like that would be

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…But oh well! Stan STILL considers him a son! No documents don't change that! Dudley is VERY fond and attached to his dad (as you can imagine, his real parents were shit) honestly? Stan is the only real dad he’s ever considered.

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Stan wholeheartedly and fully supported him when he found out Dudley was trans, he was a little confused at first, but Stan tried v e r y hard to be mindful of the questions he asked until he got on track, and he told Dudz these words “Well no matter who ya are, I’ll always love ya and support you, sport”

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Murdock has met Stan, their first meeting went HORRIBLY wrong bc uh he didn’t know this was Dudz’s dad- Murdz did try to kill him but uh Stan is oblivious as hell and didn’t even notice like at ALL

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Dudley fucking rushed Murdock and grabbed him by the face and practically tossed him out the window, Murdock was of course angry like DUDLEY WHAT THE F U C K MAN?!? …Dudley quickly began explaining to Murdz that, that man was OFF limits.

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Bc dude, that’s my dad you dickhead! You’re NOT killing my dad! And then …Oh m a n was it awkward… Murdock actually apologized for that, like …o-o h  shit- sorry Dudz, I uh- didn’t know- …The two apologized and made up- Dudley for tossing him out the window and uh Murdock for almost killing his dad.

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Stan’s first ACTUAL meeting with Murdz, oh my fucking g o d it was awkward as hell bc this man had no idea this one had tried to kill him n shit- and he would NEVER know- …When Murdock left after the meeting-

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Stan literally turned to Dudz and told him “...I don’t trust that one too much, sport… He might be a bad influence on ya” …Dudley sweating profusely at that (Stan don’t know the half of it)

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BUT if that’s who Dudley chooses and loves, then he won’t hold him back and stop him, just… He just wants his son to be careful- which brings me to the end of this nearly- Stan has NO fucking clue his son is an actual cannibal serial killer (has never seen Dudz’ face but he’d probs recognize him uh if he saw under that mask)

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But for now Dudley INTENDS to keep Stan away from the truth, he’s very desperate to hide his true identity from Stan, he’s terrified the other will be scared of him, upset with him, disgusted with him, that he’ll even be like ‘you… You’re no son of mine, you’re a monster’ he’s got it deeply ingrained that Stan would hate and disown him if he found out the truth…

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And lemme tell you right now, Dudley would NEVER under ANY circumstances hurt and or kill Stan, even if Stan was about to turn him into the police, he’ll just run away if he could and NEVER return to Stan ever again but hahaha what are the chances of that oblivious man EVER finding out his son is a wanted cannibalistic serial killer?!

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…Oh btw he has never and won’t ever try to feed Stan human meat either, no no- any meals he cooks for his dad are STRICTLY normal foods/desserts n shit like that-

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Was the one to get Dudley to actually properly hydrate bc oof- oh m a n this dude was fucking b a d at drinking water n shit- Stan helped him to drink more water.

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He’s got a southern accent when he speaks bc why not- complete this weird unholy era of cannibals having southern drawls

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And to finally finish this shit off because god this has gone on for-fucking-ever! Dudley is Pansexual.

#iswm #iswm murdock #in space with markiplier #iswm oc #Dudley redone #im so happy i re-did him tbh #...also another thing i do have like- actual reactions planned up for the other egos #like what Dudz thoughts on em would be so if anyone sees this and uh wsants #just shoot an ask about like what ego ya wanna hear Dudz' thoughts on #...n-not an in character thing- just me describing it of course #tw cannibalism #tw death #tw vomit mention #tw injury

[so-much-for-subtlety]

the dudley experience: one minute with dudz.

spoiler: I thought he was going to throw up a hairball on me but he didn’t

#dud

[askmyboys]

Dudley (Piglin Brute OC)

| Name: Dudley

| Nickname: Dudz

| Gender: He/Him but he also likes It/Its

| Age: N/A

| Height: 10ft

| Species/Race: Piglin Brute

| ‘Hair Color’: It’s pretty much just fur in the shape of hair tbh- its pink and his ‘hair’ is in a quiff style

| Eye Color: His left eye is a Crimson Brown color and his right eye, well usually he wears a black eyepatch over it but it is white and cloudy, it also has three claw marks swiped over it, he can’t see outta that eye at all.

| Skin Color/Body Type: Pink and he’s actually pretty chubby and just- w i d e, a wide lad lmao

| Appearance: Tbh he genuinely doesn’t even need to wear clothes, he has nothing to hide under there but he still likes the feeling and it makes things feel er… Less awkward, his main outfit is a black toga with a golden ribbon piece going over it and it connects to a large golden shoulder pad on his right, he wears black pants with rips and a distressed look to them with, gotta have that giant golden belt buckle to keep them pants up too (idk why i just think its silly how big them belt buckles actually are in game lmao) he has hooves for hands n feet likewise, he can grip things though with his hands- gotta have that hoof thumb or whatever ya really wanna call it, he has folded ears, fairly long tusks that stick out of his mouth, the rest of his teeth are actually pretty sharp too, also his body is pretty much all fur, but the areas with the most fur is the chest, bigem fluffy chest, the elbows, and technically the fur that makes up his hair.

He has a few golden piercings in his ears, black gauges, he also wears a large golden gauntlet that has big spikes on them on both of his wrists, some golden bracelets on his arms but not TOO many, he also has a golden nose piercing he wears in his snout as well.

| Personality: He’s got that BIG bastard energy, him stimky piglin brute mans, he’s the type to pop through your nether portal and steal a bunch of your food and call YOU a bitch, he acts SUPER tough and cold, even borderline mean but deep down? If you befriend him or he seems to like you… He’s a big softie who’s very sweet and caring, and if you do become his friend? You’ve got a DAMN good protector! Anything tries to bother you? Well it’s going to have to get through h i m first and that ain’t easy, his actual strength? It ain’t no act at all lmao

Unlike most piglins he literally doesn’t give a shit bout gold or any valuables really, he just comes to the overworld to steal people’s foods n such, while he might be a big bastard he actually won’t attack you unless you hit first, he’s actually under the chaotic neutral alignment tbh- He can rile people up because its funny to him and poke fun but he won’t actually fight unless someone fights against him first.

Tl;dr: big stimky bastard pig who’ll come over even if u don’t know each other and steal ur food, will purposefully do n say shit to piss you off, actually chaotic neutral though, will only attack if you hit first, doesn’t give a shit about gold or valuables just wants ur food, acts SUPER tough bc he kinda is tbh, definitely acts mean n cold as well, a big jerk tbh, however if ya get close with him well he’ll still be a big bitch and steal your food and be a meanie toward you, but you’ll notice its DEFINITELY more light hearted than it sounded before, anything tries to hurt you? That thing D I E S… A very good protector to have, not the cuddly or huggy type but when you’re asleep is when he’ll strike, if you catch him though he’ll only play it off like “mm… Was only protectin’ ya bud…”

| Side Facts: Because he’s still a Piglin Brute, he does grunt sometimes- mostly he grunts when he’s frustrated or literally just too tired n lazy for English conversations, he can still speak fluent Piglin as well so hey another bonus if your his friend, he can translate shit for ya if needed!

His most favorite weapon is a Mace, his second favorite weapon is his giant netherite battle axe (the reason he really doesn’t care for gold is because, well, one he just never saw the appeal but also gold breaks so. Damn. e a s i l y. He hates how easy it always broke so he went for something m u c h stronger)

...I will tell u a secret- Even though he acts tough, mean, etc- If ur close to him n such, he actually really loves cuddling- He’ll just always play it off especially if he’s caught as he was just protecting you, or he doesnt ACTUALLY enjoy this, psh nah this weak shit- ….He loves how warm humans feel though, its a nice warmth and not SUPER overwhelming warm unlike the Nether’s heat… Another thing, he’s actually SUPER DUPER soft, despite being such a big, well, b r u t e he’s soft n fluffy as all hell.

His most FAVORITE foods are: Mutton, Carrots, and Potatoes. His favorite desserts are Cake and Cookies.

He h a t e s Dried Kelp, Beetroots, and Cod.

He’s resistant to Fire and Lava as well, and while Water doesn’t hurt him he h a t e s Water, it goes against his stimky policy! Get that shit away from him! He will N O T take a bath, he will NOT get in the water no, he’ll take Lava Baths though which only ADDS to the horrible burnt smell he radiates.

#my oc #piglin brute oc #minecraft oc #original character #Dudley/Dudz #ofc i wanted to make a piglin brute oc lmao

[flauntpage]

Brett Kavanaugh's Latest Defender: The Eminently Useless Chris Dudley

Yale alumnus and Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh: he’s terrible! In addition to his hideous record of jurisprudence, his extremely-bizarre-Washington-Nationals-ticket-buying-habits, and his work in a former life suggesting that Ken Starr ask the president if he jerked off into a trash can, he's also been accused of sexual assault, by increasingly more women. Kavanaugh’s emerging malfeasance is showing the asses of all kinds of people: The President, Republican leadership in the Senate, the entirety of the conservative media infrastructure. They are all doubling down on this motherfucker even though there are another dozen Heritage Foundation goons who could do the exact same shit Kavanaugh would do, sitting around waiting for a call.

But no one has been exposed right now like Yale University has. Say what you will about Harvard, but at least it isn’t Yale, a school whose only real function is churning out the horseshit secret society creeps who run our country into the ground. Look no further than the professional athletes each school has produced. Harvard has managed to primarily churn out weirdo cult heroes like Ryan Fitzpatrick, currently in the midst of a yardage bender for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, NBA Asian-American trailblazer Jeremy Lin, dignified senator and all-time NBA memoirist Bill Bradley (Correction: Bradley went to Princeton, but is still a very good memoirist. We regret Dudley-ing that up.). Yale, on the other hand? The most famous sporting figure to emerge from the school, bar none, is Chris Dudley.

Dudley apparently knew Kavanaugh back in his college days, and considers him a "great friend," recently helped run interference for him, telling the Washington Post that, actually most of the other people they interviewed for this article are wrong, and Kavanaugh WASN’T a "sloppy drunk" who was routinely spotted slumped over asleep at parties. and could have NEVER done some heinous shit under the influence of alcohol that he wouldn’t remember.

“I went out with him all the time. He never blacked out. Never even close to blacked out,” said Dudley, a 2010 Republican candidate for governor of Oregon. “There was drinking, and there was alcohol. Brett drank, and I drank. Did he get inebriated sometimes? Yes. Did I? Yes. Just like every other college kid in America.”

Dudley is the grandest failure who ever lived, a 6'11" heap of fuck ups at the highest level, a dude who has spent his life tripping face first into mud puddles while everyone points and laughs at him. Dudley’s emergent association with Kavanaugh is probably the best-so-far sign that he absolutely won’t get confirmed, simply because everything Dudley touches withers and dies. Take, for instance, his free throws:

I hate to be the kind of pedant who says a shitty free throw shooter should shoot underhanded, I really do, but Dudley was special. He managed a career 45 percent rate in the NBA, and his form somehow made it worse.

Watch him gather the ball, raise up, set it over his head and… and…. and… shoot the ball, flashing a hitch that feels like it’s ten seconds long. On his second attempt, Marv Albert takes a few seconds to roast his hideous form on television, right as the ball drifts in a massive arc and still only taps front iron. After a Knicks player commits a lane violation and makes him take another one, Albert twists the knife. “You know, I get the idea that Chris would rather not have this extra free throw.”

Weirdly, after getting every ounce of dignity drained out of his body on TV, the extra shot manages to go in, a mild success that was turned into a crowning moment in Dudley’s elite-level, Yale-Constructed mind palace, fortified by gold leaf paintings that say “YOU ARE DOING GREAT, CHRIS” and “YOU DESERVE ALL THE SUCCESS YOU’VE BEEN AFFORDED!”

But hey… Dudley wasn’t just a miserable failure on the court. Off the hardwood, he was the NBA Players Association treasurer during the 1998-99 lockout, a labor action that ended with the players getting absolutely dominated and set up a president that would lead to them getting wrecked AGAIN in subsequent CBA negotiations. Of course, maybe Dudley was just dogging it, steering the union into disaster because his heart and soul were just so deeply aligned with management.

“I’m ready to lead our comeback.” After his retirement from being a crappy basketball player, someone in the Oregon Republican Party approached Dudz about running for Governor, like so many mediocre Yale men who came before him. For a while, he didn’t do that bad: his opponent, John Kitzhaber, was a machine politician who was an easy target for an outsider candidate. But, in politics as in basketball, Dudley was a stiff who got heaps of terrible ideas in his head, like, airing ads that featured comically corrupt NBPA chief Billy Hunter.

Dudley’s failed run at governor would probably be the most embarrassing thing that ever happened to him, if they had never legalized dunking in basketball. Because, friends, this dude LIVED to get dunked on:

Here’s Shawn Kemp rising up over Duddles, arms in the air, just waiting to take a slam, bringing shame to Portlanders everywhere who live only to see Seattle defeated in sports.

Oh hey, here’s Glenn Robinson getting some, executing the platonic ideal of driving the lane and throwing it down on a grimacing, overmatched big man. Look at Dudley’s face as he walks away from this disaster. He knows this will live forever, a totem of his shame on display for everyone.

Even Dudley’s own dunks manage to seem like Dudley getting dunked on. Here he is kind of… angling over Bill Cartwright, who absolutely couldn't care less. Two hands, looping over the body of another player, just baaaaarely making it. He doesn’t even celebrate, probably because a Yale Man never shows emotion in public, only in private, with his friends, while they all jerk off into microwaves filled with dead squirrels.

Oh, but nobody—NOBODY—has been more destroyed by any one person's single act than Dudley was when he was on the receiving end of The Shove. It is poetry in motion: Prime Shaq, in shape and looking like a fucking tank made out of nightmares, catches the ball on Dudley. He posts up, and takes Duddles DEEP in just a few short motions. He then turns around, raises up, and dunks on Dudley while thrusting his entire crotch into Chris’s midsection.

As he lands, Dudley stumbles and Shaq, who is an IMMACULATE asshole, plants two hands right in Dudley’s chest and sends him flying into the hardwood. Dudley proceeds to scramble up, soaked in his own blue blood, pick up the ball and heave it at Shaq, coming about as close to hitting the biggest dude in the league as he did on those free throws earlier. No one comes to his defense. Shaq just jogs back on D, they both get techs, and Dudley is left to stare irritably at a dude who just defined his career and life on national television.

It is, in my mind, the greatest NBA dunk of all time, just a wild tangle of peak power and bad feelings, spilling out of the screen. It works as one little piece of something, a GIF of pure domination you can play in a loop forever. It works as a short story, a tale of one man turning another into an embarrassed pile of mush. And it works as a synecdoche of the two men’s careers and lives, Shaq having paraded through anyone and everyone who stood in his way night after night, while Dudley collected fat-ass checks to be totally unnecessary, both as an NBA big man and a shitty Republican lackey, and just getting fucking owned in public over and over. Hopefully, his streak will continue in the future, both near and long term.

Brett Kavanaugh's Latest Defender: The Eminently Useless Chris Dudley published first on https://footballhighlightseurope.tumblr.com/

[bringbackmsdudley]

A Long-Winded Thank You...

My story has always been complicated, so I won't bore everyone with the ugly details.

I came to HU in 2009, but I started working for Ms. Dudley the following year. I made my closest friends because of her, got years of experience in my field because of her connections, and learned to use my voice because of her. A lot of people don't remember that I used to be shy and let people walk all over me. She didn't allow that. She things in me that even my closest family members could see and pulled it out of me.

I could stop there, but that wasn't her greatest impact. I dropped out in 2013 due to personal and financial issues. During that time, Howard switched from paper forms to a computer, losing a lot of paperwork -- mine in particular -- that showed withdrawals, overrides, etc. When I got back on my feet and decided to go back in 2016, the school told me I had a 1.4 GPA since I was still enrolled. I spent weeks begging to be readmitted, but no dice.

I decided that I would transfer...Ms. Dudley wrote my recommendation letter, talking about how great I was. She didn't care about what my transcript or the things that had been said about me. She genuinely wanted me to win and that's kind of rare.

Before the transfer went through, I got a call from someone saying that the Dean wanted to speak with me. Reluctantly, I went to see her. She talked to me about potentially letting me back in, but said I would have to go to another school and get my Associate's degree in order for that to happen.

I was short only a year -- so yeah, no, I wasn't doing that. I was told by plenty of administrators that I should've been grateful for that because I didn't even deserve to graduate from Howard. I didn't deserve it??? So of course, I did what most SOC students did when we felt attacked -- went to Dudz office. She looked at me, gave me some money and asked if I would go pick her up some lunch. Then she told me that if she wasn't in her office when I got back, to wait for her. Of course, I did what I was told.

I got back and she wasn't there, so I waited. When she finally walked in she told me to go back and see the Dean. There was an agreement on the table -- one semester at PG Community college to prove that I was a serious student. So I took it.

I wouldn't have graduated without Ms. Dudley. I wouldn't have had a four page long resume before I graduated without Ms. Dudley. I didn't have any allies at Howard besides Ms. Dudley.

I owe her so much and if I had it, it'd be hers. This can be a start.

[cryptidofthekeys]

Wow here he is, the lad, i literally made a killer sona for this shit huh, gjfkdljfdfk- i swear to g o d- i see O N E character, I grow attached to said character very much, they go on the l i s t... And then I start bustin’ out the sonas so anyways i started blasting- fghjdkdfjs but uh this one’s dark sooo...

TWs: Death, Cannibalism, Murder

| Real Name: Chase Dudley Blackwell

| Nicknames: C, Dudz, or Cryptid

| Title: The Arnston Forest Huntsman sometimes called The Rabid Huntsman (considering my name, Chase means hunt/huntsman I figured that’d be a good basis)

| Gender: He/Him

| Age: N/A but it’s clear he’s an adult

| Height: 7’0”

| Species/Race: Human. . .? If he’s human he’s got like an INHUMAN amount of strength (I wanna clarify, he’s not indestructible or invincible by any means)

| Occupation: …Not really an occupation LMAO- but he’s a Murderer essentially, a cannibal for more specifics!

| Eye Color: Baby Blue

| Hair Color: Black (his hair is long and stringy, hangs down in his face mostly unless Markus insists he puts his hair up, which he’ll do either into a ponytail or a man bun)

| Weapon of Choice: His favorite weapon is his large ax, sometimes he’ll use a butcher’s knife or a baseball bat

| Skin Color/Body Type: He’s extremely pale and kinda chubby (big large and w i d e frame man)

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| Appearance: Dudley’s main outfit is a black apron that’s torn up and dirty in many places, and then he has a dark purple shirt (he keeps his sleeves rolled up to his elbows) has a little black bow tie on as well, wears some dark purple leather gloves as well- Has black ripped up jeans on that has chains hanging down, then he has black combat boots that have purple laces in them. He wears a black bull mask over his face as well, he doesn’t wear any sorta jewelry except for black and purple gauges in his ears, he has no tail or pointed ears but he does have black and purple claws and then his teeth are razor sharp, he also has a circle beard- if I don’t say that now I’ll forget it later.

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And he has TONS of scars like ALL over his body, there’s too many to count or name he’s got so many, most of them look like they were from past struggles essentially (aka victims fighting back and some of them got pretty fuckin n a s t y with him), and those scars were caused by all sortsa things, like some were bullets, some were stab wounds, some were burn marks, etc- That’s actually one of the reasons he wears the mask over his face, he made it himself out of a bull skull that he painted black in the end, if I had to say I guess that would be the most prominent scarring would be his face got burned and so he wants to cover that up.

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| I legit do not want to do a personality tbh gfldmkfgkdls I just want a simple description  of what he looks like and some side facts- bc I mean it’s PRETTY OBVIOUS he’s a bad person, he’s a murderer and a cannibal! He’s cruel and sadistic as hell- so Imma move onto the side facts

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| Side Facts: Dudz works with Markus Crowe (that’s what I’m calling the murder mans from iswm) how those two met was fairly simple… Markus was chasing after someone who tried cutting into the Arnston Forest in hopes they’d lose the other, but little did that person know that they would run into yet another… Problem… They had run through the woods only to fall right into a bear trap set out by another infamous killer, who had unfortunately just been rounding the corner right as they got caught. He heard the scream and slowly walked toward the victim who was struggling and crying, like they always do… Screaming even louder when he approached and looked down at them.

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First thing C noticed was that they had already been pretty roughed up, in fact he saw a knife wound on one of their arms which was… Odd… However, Dudley was hungry and this would do for supper tonight, so he quickly grabbed released them from the bear trap and before they could fully get away he grabbed them by the leg and began to drag them, ignoring their screams, cries and pleading for help, they were like everyone else who came into his forest… Ugh, another screamer… Dudz HATED those, as much fun as it was to cause suffering he h a t e d loud noises…

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Unbeknownst to him however, there was someone following him… And well it’s obviously Markus, he was going to be upset for a moment- Figuring someone was going to help them but it seemed this dude was just dragging them through the dirt, literally ignoring their pleas and crying, this intrigued Markus so he decided to follow along… He wasn’t even angry at someone potentially stealing h i s kill, there was far too much curiosity to be angry right now… ANYWAYS- skipping ahead, so Cryptid drags the person back to his run down looking lil cabin in the woods with Markus secretly following behind and then peering in one of the window’s, meanwhile Dudley threw them harshly against the wall which knocked them unconscious.

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He sighed in almost relief it seemed at the screaming stopping, Markus watched through the window, watching as the other then grabbed the victim and got to work, I don’t wanna be here ALL day so basically uh Cryptid does what he does and prepares the victim essentially, like cutting them up, ripping things off, etc- Gathering his ingredients and throwing them together all while covered in blood, this made Markus grin in delight, now… Usually he wouldn’t take too kindly to someone stealing his kill, but this… This could be the start of an interesting situation… He heard Dudz huff before setting the plates down, and that’s what made Markus blink, why… Why did he prepare two plates, was there someone else? And then Dudz grabbed his ax and turned toward the window, staring DIRECTLY at Markus and gesturing for him to step inside.

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Markus was surprised by this, cautiously he kept his knife out as he slowly approached, head peeking around and in the doorway, he still had a sly grin on his face meanwhile Dudz expression was more neutral “Well well well… Hello there big guy…~ I gotta say, I’m impressed… Ya mighta stole my kill but ah, no hard feelin’s there… I ain’t here to start no trouble, so relax… Let’s put our weapons away, see?” Markus stepped into the doorway, slowly lowering his knife back to his pocket and to his surprise, the other lowered his ax and tilted his head, seemingly curious before glancing down at the plate, pointing at it then toward Markus… The other nodded “Yeah, I’m sure ya saw their wounds, dat was all me~ But like I said, ain’t no hard feelin’s… I was merely… Observing, after all, I noticed you weren’t helping ‘em out… Instead dragging them back, ignorin’ their desperate pleas and cries for help so I gots a lil bit curious ya know?”

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Dudz nodded and gestured for Markus to come on in, to which he casually did, the tension was somewhat dying down but still… Could never be too careful… Dudz sat down at the table as did Markus, and- okay to speed things along more, Markus chatted with Dudz, he was doing the talking entirely in fact (Dudz is selectively mute, he CAN talk but strangers…? …Eugh…) After a bit of listening to the other, bc Dudley was actually genuinely curious, and some of the murders the other talked about got a grin or a deep raspy chuckle from him… But then… C noticed something… Crowe didn’t seem to be eating the food which made Cryptid tilt his head again, the killer shrugged “I uh, as much I appreciate the effort, uh, I’m just a killer… Ain’t uh, ever tried eatin’ any of my victims, ya know…” Dudz shook his head and pointed at the plate, and then his brows furrowed, he seemed to be getting upset but it seemed more directed at himself as he cleared his throat…

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“...Tttt… T…Tr… Trr… Trrryy…” Markus was shocked by this, shocked by the other speaking so suddenly and quickly like that, he seemed very adamant about Markus trying the food and to not risk ruining this before it could begin he nodded “O-Okay… Yeah, alright…” And with that he picked up a piece, he actually seemed nervous for once… But Cryptid was looking at him expectantly and so Markus closed his eyes and tried some, surprisingly enough after a bit of chewing and then finally swallowing it down, Crowe sighed and looked over at C who was looking expectantly, the killer clicked his tongue and smirked “...Not bad… Definitely uh, not as bad as I thought, figured it’d wind up making me sick…” Dudz made a delighted sound, in fact he looked overjoyed as he watched Markus enjoy his cooking “Yoouuu… Rrrreally… Liiike…?” Hm, this had delighted Dudz so much he was actually trying to talk now… Markus nodded “Yes, I really like~”

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After eating Markus stood up and cautiously approached Dudz who didn’t seem as tense as earlier, if anything he was delighted… In fact Cryptid opened his arm and scooped Markus up in a big hug, an almost spine crushing hug which at first worried Markus but he awkwardly hugged back, patting the other’s back gently “U-Uh yeah yeah… Y-You’re uh, welcome buddy… Yo…You a r e kinda crushing my spine though…” Dudz blinked and carefully released the other, apologizing to which Markus held a hand up “It’s fine… Listen, I gots a proposition for ya… Figured since we uh, ain’t tryna kill each other, and hold no ill will or nothin’ like dat against each other… How’s about you an’ me… We form a lil… Alliance, of sorts?”

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Dudley blinks and tilts his head, not fully understanding what Markus means to which the other sighs “Look, I needs me a new place to crash… My uh, old place ain’t safe no more… And I figure, you an’ me, since we uh, we’re friends now how’s about I crash here? We could be an unstoppable duo! And plus, I can bring in some cash for ya if you uh, need it~ So whaddya say big guy? We gots a deal~?” Markus held out a hand and this made C think for a moment, if he had money he could technically do more… After all, the methods of cooking he had were kinda… Primitive, he’d love to have more ways to cook and maybe even… Bake, and having someone who DIDN’T scream, cry, or beg to be let go, who just said the same old rhetoric over and over again …Genuinely? It would be nice.

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So Dudz shook Markus’s hand and the that’s how the two got p much stuck together gfkldjfghdk just being in the right place at the right time …Well not for the victim cause goddamn they were in the w o r s t place BUT ahem- That’s how Dudz and Markus began to work together, Markus could get him income and plus he said he was his friend! And that’s all Cryptid needs! And Crowe needed a good place to hunker down and this was p e r f e c t so it benefited them both! This was the start of a beautiful yet deadly partnership… Sometimes Dudz does find Markus insufferable because he drags things out so PAINFULLY long like u g h, it’s painful for H I M- and many other reasons but if it came down to it, C would put his life on the line for Markus for sure, someone trying to hurt him? Dudley will legit slam them INTO the ground.

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That’s p much it on how they met though, that’s all I needed to cover, but anyways- Aside from that- Dudz literally doesn’t know about a n y of the other egos, has no idea any of those exist- No idea about the multiverse, or anything like that-

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And this ISN’T canon but I had a funny thought of just Stan being his dad, being this HUGE murderous bastard’s dad, who Dudley is soft and gentle with- like Stan is oblivious, has n o fucking clue what Blackwell does but he just sees this big dirty and bloodied dude and like yep, that’s my boy! Dudley is a monster, cruel and sadistic but then with Stan, his dad he just smiles sweetly and seems so happy as he waves and talks with like normal, essentially just “Hello dad…!” no stuttering, trying to figure out words, his voice is still deep n raspy sounding BUT he talks perfectly fine with Stan bc I mean, that’s his dad!

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Would always make sure Dudz had water on him, makes sure Dudz drinks enough water, just a normal father and a murderous cannibalistic son (but dad doesn’t know bout that bit, shh don’t tell dad!) Dudz would never tell his dad about any of that, never get him involved like EVER in that sorta business, makes sure he stays oblivious and unknowing of the truth bc if Stan ever found out, it would crush Cryptid to the point where he’d probs never show his face around dad e v e r again, he’d be too shameful and guilty, and he knows if that happened… J-Just, bad… bad things, things he doesn’t nor would e v e r want to do… :)

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BUT ANYWAYS- Sometimes C picks on Markus’s height, he finds it amusing to be so much taller and it’s also funny how a n g y Crowe gets over it, it's all in good fun of course- another reason it’s funny is that Markus is usually as cool as a cucumber, even says so himself that he doesn’t get mad so easily gkfldjfgkdls, but now there’s a polar opposite situation!

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Markus stays as cool as a cucumber, he is sly and doesn’t get upset or angry at situations as easily as C does, C can lose his temper VERY fast, he can get extremely angry in a matter of seconds and then the destruction starts, not AS cunning as Markus or as sly by any means- which ya know Crowe mentioned that bull mask he has on fits him very well because of that hot fiery temper, how angry he can get quickly but Markus tries to keep that at bay. After all, getting blindly angry like that could lead to Dudz getting hurt or w o r s e… And Crowe can’t have that- They are honestly opposites in a few regards but that one mainly.

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Markus is mostly the brains meanwhile Dudley is definitely the brawns, not to say Dudz ISN’T intelligent bc he definitely can be! Dudz has a collection of masks actually, the bull one is just very special to him since 1: it was the FIRST one he crafted and 2: Because of what Crowe said about it, that made it more special- TONS of masks, a lot of them are animal themed but then he just has regular kinds of masks that aren’t based on animals, also has MANY traps, some are regular bear traps and then some are special traps he’s invented himself, he’s invented a few with Markus as well over the time they’ve spent together.

#Dudz #iswm sona #tw death #tw cannibalism #tw murder #gonna tw tag it too just to be extra safe ya know?

[flauntpage]

NBA Dunk of the Week: Ben Simmons and the Virtue of Banging on Suckers

Before I get to this week’s dunk, a wonderful slammer from Ben Simmons that left Avery Bradley sprawled out on the hardwood, I wanna write about a legendary dunk from the past: Shaquille O’Neal blitzing Chris Dudley. Don't worry, this will all make sense when it's over.

If you’re not familiar with the dunk, it is, quite simply, the best and most Shaq–esque dunk of Shaq’s extremely Shaq career: simplicity and brutality all in several wonderful, life-affirming seconds.

Shaq gets the ball in the post against Dudz, who is, uh, lighter than Shaq. Shaq makes three dribbles in the post, heaves his back into him, turns around—almost as if Dudley isn’t even there—rises up with his legs splayed as far as possible, practically thrusting his crotch into Dudley, and slams down so heavily you can hear the rim aching. Dudley, trying not to fall or something, finds his arms wrapped around Shaq, who is exhibiting absolutely no respect for Dudley. Shaq then winds back and throws him to the ground with a two-handed shove before jogging back on defense. The refs appear to have, like, completely missed that Dudley was not, in fact, harmlessly taken down by the pure momentum of the play, but rather an action of pure malice.

Dudley stands up, more thoroughly owned than he has been in his life (up to that point), picks up the ball, and hucks it at Shaq with an optimally pissy look on his face. It’s incredible. You think about being dunked on as being humiliating, but most dudes seem to, at least for the most part, take it in stride, accept that it’s part of the game. But getting dunked on, and then getting sprawled by the NBA’s all-time greatest schoolyard bully? It’s such an open and active stripping of your opponent’s honor, the only natural response is to stand up and pitifully try to reclaim a shred of dignity by doing something even more embarrassing. It is, truly, one of the great, perfect moments in the history of the NBA.

When I see Shaq throw that seven-foot string bean on the ground, my spirit becomes one with the big man’s. I find joy and glee and release in his success and in his extra dickhead flourish, as Dudley, all angles and bones, collapses on the baseline. In that moment I become, for one second, not a hermit blogger but the hand of Shaq itself. Dudley's embarrassment at the hands of the Big Cactus gives me a little piece of that power, inspiration in the moment.

But as I get older and, as Dudley before me, I become a middle-aged Pacific Northwesterner with acute (albeit wildly divergent) political opinions, I live in fear. I fear that someday I will not ever again feel the joy I feel when I see a sucker take on more than he can handle, and get banged on. I worry that where once stood cheerful malice, in watching someone’s day get fucking ruined by Shaq, there will be only pity, understanding, empathy. I feel the encroaching softness possessing me. I fear it.

Take, for instance, the above. Avery Bradley is on my personal short list of dudes who I like to see get chumped. He played for the Celtics for a long time, he is naturally overrated by dint of his try-hard-ass defense, and he has no aesthetic or ideological qualities of which to speak. In every part of me I’m truly acquainted with, watching Bradley pick up Ben Simmons in transition, get almost immediately laid out, fall to the ground, and throw up his hands in frustration is a mitzvah, a dream, a vision of myself, resplendent in youth, the world ahead of me for the taking. It is, simply, two points that belong to me. I am Ben Simmons, I am the young man at the center of the future for the Sixers, and I have destroyed the banal Bradleys of the world. I am victorious.

But there is a haunting person in the back of me, living in the darkness of my mind, dancing like an impish ballerina, squawking and spinning and chirping, troubling my present consciousness with the horror of a thought that I am not comfortable with. It coos…

Aww man, poor guy…maybe that was a charge.

I wretch, I grab the thought and do everything I can to cast it out of my mind. I am youth, I am the future, I am glorious, I am the bullet train speeding through the mansions of the world. I am not the defender getting blitzed and throwing up his hands, begging for the favor of the ref! I know this! I do not FEEL Shaq’s hand on my chest as he embarasses me in front of millions of people, I AM SHAQ’S HAND, the confident instrument of his petty wrath!

But you cannot turn away from the voices in your head, not really. Giving them purchase gives you fear, and now the fear that I am washed, forever splayed out on the court, lives in me forever, chirping, ever massaging my mind, trying to haul me away from the place I have always believed I belonged—the land of winners. I pray I live with the strength to remain.

NBA Dunk of the Week: Ben Simmons and the Virtue of Banging on Suckers published first on http://ift.tt/2pLTmlv