#I wish I could say I was joking.... I'm here in my clown outfit | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ahsxual · 4 years

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Sassy Girl

Pairing: L!Joker x Fem!Reader

Summary: J finally took you to a meeting with his men. After seeing you agitated, he decides to confront you about it once you leave.

Genre: Smut

Warnings: Sir kink, spanking, dom/sub, vaginal sex, nipple play, degradation, rough kissing, slightly exhibitionism, dirty talk, breath play (nothing too serious), sassy reader, swearing

Word Count: 3,3k

A/N: soo me and @harlequinjoke were role-playing about L!Joker and Harley Quinn, and I really liked the idea, so I decided to write something about it <3 It's my first time writing about J (internally shaking). I got inspired by the incredible, unique and talented @jokerslilhyena, so I hope I get more comfortable with time writing him, because I REALLY love that chaotic bastard 💜💚

Gif Credits: @antonija89

You and J had an uncommon relationship: you weren't considered his girlfriend and vice-versa, however you were together. It was a totally different experience dating someone so chaotic as him, someone so dangerous and unpredictable. In the beggining, you actually were scared that he would hurt you, however he has proved the opposite: whenever you argued, he would break the first thing he found, scream or even leave for a long time... but he never would lay a hand on you and would always come back, eventually. However, he never apologized, not directly. He was extremely aggressive and reckless towards others, but with you... he wasn’t any of that. Of course he was very proud, would still throw tantrums here and there and sometimes he seemed indifferent, especially when the subject was about affection. Nevertheless, he loves you in a way that, even if it’s strange and unreal to others, he still shows you that he cares for you, that he doesn’t want to make you feel bad and he does anything to protect you from the rude and injustice world you live in. For you, it’s his "special" way to love and honestly, you are fine with it, since he always comes back to you and keeps you alive and safe.

Sometimes you wondered how did you get where you were, having a "relationship" with the one and only prince of crime, the one that everyone fears with all their being. But you, you were unordinary and different from others... and that's what caught his attention. You knew you wouldn't be judge by him, wether it was physically or mentally.

You always had a thing for villains, J being the most dangerous and strategically intelligent of them all: you saw J as someone who doesn't care about other's opinions, someone courageous enough to prove and make the world wrong, someone who isn't afraid to express himself and be the way he was meant to be... the way life made him. You deeply admire all those features about him: his confidence, his intelligence, his insight...

Today was an unexpected day: you wanted to see how J worked, how he organized and "planned" his ideas, how the "bad guy" life was. J, of course, didn't let you go... at first. He said that it didn't make sense for you to join him and he didn't want to get distracted by you, but you knew that was not the whole truth. J didn't want to show his only weakness to others, especially to dangerous people. As intelligent and practical he could be, he was just one man, so he avoided dealing with even more problems, mainly because you were the one who would be in danger. Nevertheless, you insisted, telling him that he didn't need to present you as someone he was having a case with, just a girl who wants to be apart of his "plan".

J knew you would bother him about that until he accept it, so today he finally gave you the answer you were dying for to hear.

"Oh... really? You won't argue with me about this anymore?" you were surprised for him letting you go.

"What do ya want me to do, huh? You were pressuring me all the time about it, so this is the only way to ah... end this." he was obviously annoyed, but he wanted to do that favor to you too. Maybe it wouldn't be as bad as he thought, and it would be one time only, so it was not a big deal.

"Thanks, J! I knew you wouldn't be such a daddy, it means a lot to me!" he smirked before you hugged him by the neck, something he was not expecting. He just tapped your back with his gloved hand in response, a gesture meaning you were welcome.

"Come on bunny, I can't be late. The boss have always to show up before his ah... employees." he joked, earning a laugh from you. You quickly put some comfortable shorts and a top that slightly showed your cleavage.

"I'm ready, time to go!" you said excitedly. J noticed that your outfit wasn't the most appropriate, but he didn't have time to tell you to change into something that wouldn't show too much skin. He thinks that you should cover the first piece of your neck's skin, to the tip of your toe. J was a possessive man to that extent... and you were a teasing to that extent too.

When you entered J's stolen car, you noticed how the back seats were spacious... immediately your dirty thoughts signaled their arrival, which made you unconsciously bit your lip slowly. Your clown didn't miss it, being as observant as he was, and instantly thought this wasn't a good idea... at all.

"Ya better stop doing that with your ah... lip, doll. Ya better behave or I will make ya be sorry later." he said in a serious tone. The sexual tension between you two was always evident, something that both of you loved and needed: J could have his way with you, respecting your limits obviously, and you would just enjoy the sex as much as he did, since no other man could dominate and have his way with you the way he did... you were his little masochist, his strong woman that simultaneously was so easy to break. He was obcessed with you: you were his drug, his only weakness, his vicious, his significant other... you just completed him, even though he never told you that, he definitely proved it to you everyday.

You usually have an answer for everything he says, but now you remained quite to not make things worse for both of you. You had to keep that fire inside your core hidden from his men or there would be consequences... after all, he is a man of his word.

You finally arrived to the place where the meeting would occur: it was an abandoned building as expected; around it, was nothing more than grit and some old and rotten cars; the sky was almost black, the stars and moon being the only ones lightning the establishment; there were two men located at the front door of the same big building, and surely there were others in the rear entrance. You couldn’t deny you were feeling nervous. As much as sometimes you wished, you couldn't be completely fearless like J.

"Don't worry doll, ya don't need to be afraid. If something goes wrong, we ah... always have a backup." he confidently said, showing you the inside of his coat covered in bombs and grenades. You laughed once again.

"Sure you do, J. You wouldn't be you if you didn't have it." you said while winking at him. He smirked before getting out of the car.

You knew from now on, until the meeting is over, he would act differently: he couldn't have the reputation of being a murderous clown with a soft spot for his little bunny. No one would take him seriously once that was revealed, and you understood it perfectly.

Once you arrived at the front door, where the two men were, they looked strangely at you and then at J.

"Will ya stay there looking at me like the ah... dick heads you are, or ya will let me pass already, huh?" J was expecting this reaction from them, yet his acknowledge didn't prevent him from being annoyed: he wasn't in the mood to give explanations to anyone, mainly to his temporarily needed men. The two men looked at each other, before nodding towards their boss and letting you both pass the tall, rigid door.

The moment you entered the room, you saw all of his men in their seats, already prepared for their meeting with their boss... and his company.

"Who's that?" a man asked boldly.

"She's our ah... tonight's special guest. She will help us with our mission by dealing with the ah... cops." he lied, successfully convencing them. He knew they wouldn't be suspicious about it, since that was his task. You sitted right next to him, noticing the side glances from some men.

While time passed and J talked about his "plan", you deeply admired how attractive he looked: he was so confident, fearless, so right about what he was saying and doing... it made you think how is it possible for a single man to be so strategic and dominant with others... and when J was with you, it was impossible not getting completely horny, feeling hot as hell and being completely at his mercy, gladly. He obviously noticed your long glances in his direction and felt how your legs would rub shamelessly against each other under the table, where only he could catch your signals, since you were almost glued to each other.

"Any questions about what I just said?" he asked after explaining everything that should be done. His men just nodded in return. "Good. Tomorrow morning, 9:30 am. I will be ah... extremely upset if any of you arrive late. And trust me, gentlemen, you wouldn't like to see me mad." he then got up, grabbing your arm and pulling you in front of him while you were walking, which surprised you. Once you approached the car, he opened the back door and pushed you roughly into the back seat, making you lay down with him above you after removing his long purple coat covered in grenades into the passenger seat.

"Now, now... would ya explain me what you were ah... doing back there, huh? Ya seemed very... restless during the reunion, don't ya think... bunny?" he whispered one of your favorite nicknames given by him into your ear, being so close that you could see every little and precise detail on his face: you could feel his hot breath against your skin and see his pupils dilating more and more by every passed second. J decided to confront you about it, wanting you to admit everything you did back there right in front of his face... and you would be the best liar if you said he didn't give you chills all over your body, especially making your core dripping from excitement and eagerness.

"I-I wasn't doing anything, I was just listening to y-"

"Ata-tada, ya don't wanna go that way, doll. You ah... know very well that I don't like when people lie on my face, especially you... not-one-bit." he madly said, pressing firmly the last words with his skilled tongue. Oh, how you loved seeing your psychotic clown having his way with you...

"What do you want me to say J, huh?? That yes, I was feeling horny like a goddamm whore just from seeing you leading those assholes, that I couldn't stop looking and admiring you?? That I couldn't even countain myself from touching myself like a fucking needy virgin?!" you couldn't take it anymore, so you spelled it out so he could make a move as soon as possible... because you knew very well: if you aren't honest with him and don't tell him what you desire, he will tease until you cry and beg desperately for him to touch you... and when that happens, J won't do anything until you admit it. That's how provocative and bastardous he was... but you loved it. J seemed pleased with your answer, since he grabbed you hardly by your hair and pushed you for a clumsily and rough kiss. You wanted to test his limits a little further, so when you felt his tongue against your lower lip, you didn't give him the permission to explore your mouth like he wished. By this, he bit your lower lip hard enough to draw some blood, showing how you couldn't be in control. If you even tried, you would suffer the consequences. You groaned while you tasted your own blood, seeing his face lighten once he saw and tasted the blood himself. His eyes were totally dark now, just like his soul and heart: you knew how much he loved pain and blood, something that was fully attached to his being.

"Ya really know how to make me crazy, Y/n. And ya know as well that has ah... price to pay, dontcha?" you simply nodded, wanting to feel the little pleasure he was giving to you. Suddenly you felt your neck being forcely grabbed by a gloved hand. "I want a strict answer." he said with a deep and low tone, making goosebumps all over your skin.

"Y-yes..." you moaned quietly.

"I couldn't hear ya. Yes what?" he asked even more serious now, pressing harder into your neck, but not enough to cut your air completely. The car door was still open, so if you spoke or moaned too loud, his men would hear you.

"Y-yes Sir!!" you shamelessly spoke loudly. J didn't closed the door for some reason, so why would you care?

"Hmm that's what I like to hear, my good little obedient girl..." he then rubbed his hips hardly into yours, moving his lips towards your neck while sucking and biting until it was red and purple. "You look amazing with those painted on ya, doll. The purple ah... suits you perfectly." he praised you, slowly moving to your already harden nipples. J grabbed your top and ripped it off, but you couldn't care less about it. Luckily, it wasn't your favorite. You didn't own a bra, grabbing his attention immediately. "Hmm someone hasn't been behaving like they should. Ya know what happens to ah... naughty and miss-behaving girls, dontcha doll? Huh?" he dangerously spoke, while pinching your nipples hard enough to give you immense pleasure and the right amount of pain.

"N-no sir, I don't..." you eagerly answered, afraid and excited at the same time about what it would happen next. He smirked at you, his yellow teeth now red from your blood, a view that would give nightmares to anyone, but it only made you wetter. J slowly approached you, whispering dangerously into your hear.

"They get punished." the only thing you knew was being brutally turned over, making your ass being exposed after he ripped your shorts as well.

"No, p-please sir!! I promise I will be a good girl..." you cried, which didn't affect him at all.

"Too late for apologies now, sweet cheeks." suddenly you felt a hard spank into your right ass cheek. "Count until five to me, doll. If ya don't, I will start over... you already know the rules." you knew you had to endure your punishment or it would be much worse. Obviously he was doing this because he knew you liked it as much as he did: if not, you would never be in the position you were right now. You didn't have a choice but to count every spank he gave you, involuntary missing on the fourth, which meant he would have to do everything over again.

"Five!!" you screamed, your ass now painted in red and some shades of purple. You felt the burning sensation so intensely, you could swear your butt was actually on fire. Yet you wouldn't complain, since you loved the feeling of burnt skin after his spankings. "P-please sir, just fuck me, I'm begging you!! I-I will do anything to please you, anything!!" you cried harder, both of you knowing those tears were nothing but a reaction of the pleasure you were feeling and wanted to feel. J thought for a moment if he should make you beg for him a little more, or have mercy. After all, he was just eager was you were, yet he loves to play with you first more than anything.

He suddenly pressed his cock against your dripping entrance, without give you time to adjust to him. It wasn't too much hard to take him, since you were so wet, he could slide inside you extremely easily. But that didn't prevent you from feeling the pain right after, when he grabbed your hips harder than ever and fucked you faster than the light itself. His nails were breaking your skin with each deep thrust he did, more blood flooding down your thighs. J thought in taking his knife to cut you, but he preferred to do it when the two of you were in your house by yourselves, where he had the whole time he needed to really play with you.

"F-fuck!! Please J, don't stop!!" he loved how easily it was to make you cum. You once told him in your first times it would take time for you to cum, because you were shy and insecure at the beginning. But ohh, how that changed... for better, surely. And you know he was the responsible for making you feel comfortable about it: J is the only man who gives you pure pleasure, without making you feel ashamed. After all, he is not a monster like everyone, incluinding batman, thinks. He's just... a man ahead of the curve.

He grabbed your hair forcely with his left gloved hand, while his right one came directly to rub your clit hard.

"Cum for me, you fucking slut. Show me how such a needy whore you are, let me feel ya squeeze my cock hard while I fuck ya until you can't fucking walk tomorrow." he groaned into your hear, his tone much lower than before. That was enough to make you cum right there, even if he wouldn't touch you at all.

"Ohh f-fuck, I'm gonna cum J!!" you moaned loudly before cumming hard on his thick, merciless cock. You felt his dick twisting inside you, while his pace became sloppy, faster and harder, a sign that he was about to cum.

"I'm going to fill that fucking tight pussy and you will keep my cum inside of ya, do ya hear me?!" he loudly demanded, wanting to hear your response before he cums.

"Y-yes sir!! I-I will keep every last drop of you inside me, please just cum inside me, please... I'm begging you!" and that was it. J came deeply inside you while groaning like a wild animal.

The two of you laid there to get some air, him being on top of you, supporting some of his height with his elbows to not crush you. You gently massaged his back in a comforting way, your code to let him know you enjoyed your moment and were okay, that he didn't hurt you badly.

"Wow, that was... amazing. I should come to your meetings more often." he laughed at this, finally looking into your eyes.

"Ya really aren't innocent as ya seem to be doll, and I really like to see that ah... sassy side of yours. We should discuss that after our... second round when we get back home, huh? I mean, if ya can be able to speak after that." you playfully punched him on his arm while laughing, already feeling excited again.

"We will see about that, then. Let's just get home now, can't wait for that promised second round." you winked at him, earning a big smirk from clown.

"I'm sure they know now that ya aren't just some ah... chick apart of the mission."

"Well, at least they know now that they don't have a chance with me, even if they tried." after hearing that, he kissed you passionately in his own way, grabbing your ass in the process, before moving to the front seat so he could drive home to where both of you will continue your so promised round two.

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elusive---ivory · 4 years

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The Woman In Velvet pt. 5

Aaaaa, this is a lot one. This one is just all fluffy and fun.

WARNINGS: None, just fluff

PAIRING: Arthur x Oc.

Masterlist

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

Three little girls were in the dining room, setting the table for their dinner.

"Ha, Seriously Sandy? You still don't have a date for Friday?" The girl with dimples giggled.

The girl with black hair shook her head and shrugged. "Looks like I won't be joining you for your triple date."

The girl without dimples gave her a shocked look and gasped. "Sandy! Don't be such a debbie downer. I'll set you up with someone."

The girl with dimples scoffed. "Really? Because, the last time you played matchmaker, you set up Dollar Dave with his sister."

The two sisters bickered until a large man appeared in the entrance of the dining room.

"Girls." The man spoke. His voice was raspy. He had a thick, black, cigar hanging out of his mouth. He looked over at the girl with black hair. The man took a seat at the newly set table.

"Deliah, Destiny, if your cousin doesn't wish to attend your ridiculous triple date, then don't force her."

The girl with black hair turned away from the man and muttered a small "Thank you" under her breath. She sat next to him, but scooted away a few inches. The two other girls rolled their eyes and sat down with them.

"Besides, I think Sandy and I would have lots of fun without the two of you, ain't that right, doll?" His eyes were glued on the girl next to him. She gulped hard. She stared hard at her cousins.

They both stared back with menacing looks. Neither of them bothered to help.

Sandy woke up to a dreaded alarm clock going off.

'Funny,' she thought. Her alarm didn't work at all. She had planned on getting a new one, but it was her same alarm clock. As she opened her eyes a little bit, she took in her surroundings. She was in her bed, and in her usual nightie. What was different about today?

"Oh fuck." She said, aloud. Sandy looked around. She threw the bed sheets off her body and quickly ran into her living room.

Arthur was standing there in the kitchen, shirtless. Sandy approached him carefully, still not fully understanding what was going on. The early morning sun was slowly creeping outside the window. The small apartment was dark, beside the light of in the kitchen.

"Hey." Sandy said, quietly.

Arthur looked around him, slightly startled. He didn't expect her to be up yet.

Arthur smiled at her gently. "Good morning."

Sandy looked down, bashfully. "Yeah, what are you doing up?" She stepped into the florescent lighting of the kitchen.

Arthur shrugged. "I couldn't sleep."

"Really? Did you fix my clock?" Sandy smiled, giggling slightly.

"Yeah, you talk in your sleep. You kept mumbling about the alarm, so I fixed it." Arthur answered, sheepishly.

"Also, we were on the couch when," Sandy cleared her throat, "we, ya know."

Arthur smiled. "You also sleepwalk."

Sandy giggled and gently punched his shoulder. "You got all of that from just spending the night with me. Color me impressed, Detective."

Arthur flinched at her sudden roughhousing, but chuckled at her joke. "Yeah, you know. I do stand up comedy."

Sandy raised her eyebrow. "Really?" She said, brewing her coffee.

Arthur nodded, shyly. "Yeah. Tomorrow night will be my very first gig."

"Huh." Sandy stirred her coffee. "Save me a seat in the front." She winked, booping his nose.

Sandy walked out of the kitchen. Arthur's eyes followed her dreamily.

Sandy finally got into her routine according, putting on a seemingly different work uniform. Instead of matted and ripped purple violet blouse, it was a red and black velvet with a black satin skirt. It wasn't at all comfortable, but she had to make do. She put on black heels matching the overall theme of the outfit. When she was done, she found her cheap frame glasses, and gently placed them on her face.

Sandy walked back into the kitchen to give Arthur a small peck on his cheek.

"I'm heading out. Here's the spare key, just incase you want to lounge around here for today." Sandy placed a small key in his hand. "Try not to burn down the apartment." She giggled stepping out of the door.

Arthur's eyes never left her figure once. She looked so elegant when she walked. His hand gently touched the cheek where she kissed him. It left him breathless.

The gloomy office building seemed to be even more dull and dreary than usual. Sandy sighed sitting there in her small cubicle.

"Hey, did you hear about those subway killings?"

Sandy overheard two coworkers talking. Often times when she eavesdropped she would mostly hear some stupid gossip like she fucked or he fucked her etc, but this seemed serious.

"Yeah, I did. I hear they were employees of ours."

This caught Sandy's attention. 'Employees?' She thought. She continued listening intently.

"Wayne Enterprises?"

"Yeah, I hear one of them was Dennis Cullen."

Sandy's eyes widened. 'Dennis is dead?' Half of her celebrated the death of that bastard, but it just seemed wrong. She snapped out of her thoughts when a coworker knocked on Sandy's cubicle.

"Sandy, the boss wants you."

She took a long sigh. She got out of her chair and walked down to the boss's office.

"Needed me, Mr. Don?" Sandy asked, being as polite as she could be.

A large man looked up at Sandy from his paperwork.

"Yes, please take a seat." Mr. Don gestured to the two chairs in front of him.

"Why were you not here yesterday?" His voice sounded frustrated.

"Well, sir, I was really sick, yesterday and-"

Mr. Don cut her off with a glare.

"Look, I'm too bent on excuses. Now, as you may know, Dennis, your associate, has recently passed away. It's a shame, I know, but he had lots of clients. Since he's gone, you have to take after his clients." Mr. Don looked back down at his paperwork.

Sandy stood there dumbfounded.

"Wait. Shouldn't the person getting his position get his clients?" Sandy crossed her arms.

Mr. Don looked at her begrudgingly. "Well, yes, but there's still so many clients he had. Most are pretty upset by the current circumstances. Could you please do these few clients?" Mr. Don held a sudden desperation in his gruff voice.

Sandy gave a defeated sigh. "Alright. I'll see what I can do about the clients."

Dennis would always brag about his clients and how high maintenance they were. How he was so lucky to always have meetings with the one and only, Thomas Wayne. His position was completely up for grabs.

Sandy didn't want Dennis's stupid position. Not like she could ever get get it. She was a woman working 45 hours a week, yet being paid so little.

'Why the fuck did people get so angry over some dudes getting killed on a subway?' Sandy growled in her thoughts, as she walked out of the office building.

All day clients were yelling and screaming about how they furious they were for not getting their fucking products. It gave her such a headache.

Her heels tapped the wet pavement. The lights of bars and restaurants colored the numerous puddles on the ground.

As she was walking down the street, she felt a pair of eyes on her.

Crack.

She turned around. Her eyes monitored the alleyway next to her. She strutted ahead, continuing her path, while being on high alert.

Crack.

She heard it again. She started walking fast. As she did so, Sandy glanced behind her. It was a silhouette of a man walking fast. Her heart stopped. She kept walking faster, until she was gently jogging in her heels. She was almost to the subway.

The man had finally caught up to her, and gently tapped her shoulder.

Sandy froze. She turned around to face her stalker.

Arthur smiled gently, taking off the yellow hood of his hoodie.

She sighed in relief. "Oh, thank god. Arthur, it's just you." Sandy smiled at her supposed stalker. "I thought you were the subway killer."

Arthur raised an eyebrow. "Oh, yeah, so I've heard."

"How could you not? It's everywhere. Who cares about some assholes dying?" Sandy tapped around her coat. "Damn it." She hissed under her breath.

"Hey, Art." Sandy said, getting his attention.

Arthur tilted his head. "Hmm?"

"Do you think I can bum a cig?" Sandy asked, desperately.

"Uh, yeah sure." Arthur handed her a fresh cigarette.

Sandy lit the cancer stick, inhaling the dangerous smoke, then exhaling it out of her lungs.

"Thanks, Artie." Sandy smiled. "Say, you never told me why you were out here following me anyway?" She said, with the cigarette hanging out of her mouth.

Arthur looked down, almost like a guilty puppy.

"I, uh, was worried." Arthur said, twiddling his thumbs.

Sandy smirked. "Worried? Aww, Artie. You don't need to worry about me, sweets." Sandy pressed a small kiss on his cheek.

Arthur started fidgeting with the bottom of his hoodie. "Uhh, well, of course, I do, Sandy. It's dangerous."

Sandy giggled. "Ok, I guess you can walk me back to my apartment." She put out the cigarette, and linked arms with Arthur.

The subway was deserted. The florescent lights flickered on and off as the loud railings of the subway train moved by.

Sandy was seated by Arthur's side, leaning on him a bit. For Sandy, Arthur was like a breath of fresh air. He was so comforting and sweet. He listened to Sandy's problems, no matter how stupid they were to her.

"So, you're a party clown?" Sandy said, holding Arthur's hand in hers.

"Yeah, at least I was. I'm focusing more on my comedy career. I've got lots of jokes." Arthur put emphasis on the word lots.

"You said that this morning. Let me hear some of your jokes." Sandy said, interested.

Arthur eyes lit up.

"Oh? Let me get my joke book." Arthur reached into his back pocket and pulled out a worn down journal. Arthur gently handed the journal to Sandy.

Sandy flipped through a few pages of the journal.

"Well, what do you think?" Arthur asked, impatient. He looked pretty anxious.

Sandy laughed a little.

"How come poor people are so confused? They don't make sense." Sandy read, still laughing. "That's a stupid joke."

Arthur frowned. "Oh."

Sandy immediately corrected herself. "No, no, no. It's great, Arthur. You're gonna be great. I know it."

Arthur's frowned disappeared, and turned into a smirk. "You think so?"

"I know so, babe." Sandy kissed his nose.

"Could I look through your book more?"

Arthur nodded.

Sandy looked through each page, but there's one page that caught her eye. It had a polaroid picture of her with twisted writings all over the page.

Mrz. Sandy Fleck

Mrz. Sandera Fleck

MY dEaR, Sandy

Sandy's eyes read the page over and over again. Arthur began to look anxious.

The subway came to a stop.

"This is our stop." Sandy handed his journal back to him. "And, by the way, it's spelled S-A-N-D-R-A." She said, stepping out of the subway doors. Arthur followed behind her.

#joker x reader #joker arthur fleck #arthur fleck x reader #arthur fleck x oc #arthur fleck #joker movie #joker 2019 #the woman in velvet

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kurtty-drabbles · 5 years

Note

“Please do not feed the killer clown.” / "I'm not a clown!" / "You're objecting to the wrong part of that sentence." (Ultimate AU)

@djinmer4 @dannybagpipesarecalling @discordsworld @bamfoftheundead

N/A: headcanon that Ult Kurt likes horror movies.

The success of IT, the movie is something that no one could have predicted not even the author, but, the movie has its own fandom and many people are dressing as characters from the movie. Kitty Pryde is not exactly fond of horror movies much less IT.

If she has to pick one horror movie, well, she does pick the movie "Ring" just because the outfit is not complex to cosplay and Kitty´s own powers do help craft a good horror joke.

Meggan and Brian are Freddy and Jason. When questioned why they admitted shyly that they lost a bet to Elizabeth and they are going as those characters. "I never saw those movies, Meggan, what Jason and Freddy are" and Meggan smiles widely "glad you ask, my dear, all it begins in the 80´s"

Meanwhile, Kurt Wagner arrives as IT and well, let´s say people aren´t expecting this.

Peter Wisdom is dressed as Chuck. And once he saw Kurt his only reply is. "Please do not feed the killer clown.”

"I'm not a clown!" Kurt replies back without a care.

"You're objecting to the wrong part of that sentence," Kitty replies ready to apart any fight between the two men.

Pete is not fond of Kurt. If he had his knives...

Kurt can and wishes to kill Pete any minute. If there´s no witness here...

#ultimate au #I love Brian/Meggan #Kurt wagner #kurtty #yandere!Kurt #kitty pryde

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fly-pow-bye · 6 years

Text

Powerpuff Girls - “Twas the Fight Before Christmas”

Written by: Lauren Faust, Craig Lewis

Storyboarded by: Lauren Faust, Greg Colton, Brian Larsen, Paul McEvoy

Music by: James L. Venable, Thomas Chase, Steve Rucker

Art Direction: Paul Stec

Animation Direction: Robert Alvarez, John McIntyre, Randy Myers

Seasons Beatings!

Narrator: ‘Twas the City of Townsville, and all through the town

all the townsfolk are stirring, as snow is falling down

It's bitter and freezing in the dead of December,

But there's reason for joy, if you can remember.

For it's this time of year that our story unfolds,

When our hearts are the warmest, despite all the cold.

Yes, it is Christmas, just two days before,

And all through the town, none can wait anymore...

No doubt about it, this is a Christmas special. Not only is it snowing and freezing, the Narrator speaks entirely in rhyme. Fitting, as this plot is similar to a Dr. Seuss classic that took place during Christmas. Well, sort of.

The special starts two days before Christmas, as Townsville awaits that “one certain fat guy”. This is especially true for the kids at Pokey Oaks Kindergarten. Ah, Pokey Oaks. Not only does the Narrator say it, we see the sign right there.

Bubbles is singing Deck the Hells as she’s taping drawings of Santa on the bulletin board. Buttercup is gloating about her long Christmas list, the only readable word being “Gimme.” Got to love the subtle background jokes.

Not so subtle is a reference to the Red Ryder BB gun as made famous by A Christmas Story. This was long before A Christmas Story was mass-marketed to the point where they made an awful sequel to it more than a decade after the original. Hmm, sounds a bit familiar. No points for anyone who can guess the response to this, courtesy of Princess.

Parodying so many movie posters that it’s hard to tell which one its referencing, Princess comes up to the Powerpuff Girls to tell them that, since Daddy gives her everything she wants anyway, she only has one thing on her list: to be a Powerpuff Girl. Duh, she’s naughty, and the Powerpuff Girls even give a list that is essentially a best of for the people who aren’t familiar with her:

She bought the city and legalized crime! (Bought and Scold)

She hired Mojo Jojo and tried to destroy the Powerpuff Girls! (Mo Job)

She gave the Powerpuff Girls a bomb for their birthday! (Birthday Bash)

She teamed up with three felons and went on a crime spree! (Meet The Beat-Alls)

She tricked their friend Robin into stealing, and then tattled on her! (Super Friends)

I believe this is the only episode that actually mentions Robin outside of Super Friends, actually. I can understand why: new characters being added late in the show is a great way to jump the shark. Still, such super friends! As Blossom walks away, she tells Princess to change her ways, or else she's getting coal in her stocking. For the record, even in the original, a walking Powerpuff Girl looks awkward.

Princess completely scoffs at this idea that she’s spoiled and naughty, as she steps on Ms. Keane’s foot on her way out. She asks her driver if she’s naughty, and we get a whole skit. It could have been a short all to itself, it’s a classic.

The same scene happens with a servant and a nanny, and this episode’s biggest problem shows its head here. This special is 44 minutes long, four times the length of a normal Powerpuff Girls episode. Season 4′s problems with pacing in certain episodes due to their double-episode length are exacerbated here, as I feel a lot of scenes are here just to fill time. This is far from the worst example.

After opening her closet to get more pillows, as her maid quickly decided not to say anything and leave the room at her "naughty or nice question", only to be completely covered in a mountain of coal apparently stored from previous Christmases. She uses the coal to put lines under her eyes, and she puts on an all black outfit. Princess is planning something big, the Narrator fears in rhyme. But first, we got to take a detour.

Some people put up their decorations early, and some people put them up really late, and the Powerpuff Girls home is certainly in the latter, waiting until at least Christmas Eve Eve to finally put up all the decorations. Then again, when your kids can fly super fast, there’s no need to spend a whole day putting up everything.

Indeed, we see the Powerpuff Girls decorating in a super hero way, all in a race to see who gets to put the star on the top. Does this actually add to the plot? Not really, but it’s still a great scene to show off the more mundane ways the Powerpuff Girls use their powers. It is also a great way to have footage a promotional music video would use.

The Professor is here to make this not-so-generic tree lighting day special by lighting up the tree. Unfortunately, he has a bit of trouble with the lights, as we see for the next minute. I can see what they could have taken out if they wanted to condense this into a regular episode. A 22 minute episode, but still.

Professor Utonium: I can make three girls out of seasoning, but I can’t get these lights to work!

Thanks, I needed this quote.

We get a small tour of Townsville awaiting for the next day, which is used for contrast with future scenes, but is mostly just filler. Highlights include a shot of a My Little Pony parody being awaited by the Mayor, doubly funny considering one of the credited writers of this special, and Mojo Jojo trying to hang an ornament on a metal tree.

Princess infiltrates Santa’s workshop in a way similar to a spy movie for the next three minutes. I will say, wearing all black was probably not a good idea in the bright and cheery Santa's workshop, but it works anyway. There's some creative imagery, being Santa's workshop and all, but I didn't remember too much about this scene. We're only waiting in suspense to learn the obvious that she couldn't realize.

She gets to Santa's private office, and is horrified to see the truth: all of the girls she hated are on the nice list, and she's on the naughty list. Actually, there's a lot more to it than that!

See, Princess was so naughty, that she’s the only person on the naughty list. He didn’t even need to make a list; he just has the naughty sticky note. She was just that bad; everyone else is nice by comparison; even Mojo Jojo is going to get something for Christmas. Remember that when you got presents even though you totally stole from the cookie jar: Princess sinned for your sins.

That, and it’s pretty convenient for Princess’s plot.

Using a magic pencil that can erase ink, she swaps the two headings. Hey, it is Santa Claus we're dealing with, he probably has an eraser with a blue part that actually does erase ink. Of course, Santa can’t possibly think that every person except for one kid was naughty, right?

At the Powerpuff home, we cut back to the Powerpuff Girls slowly going to sleep. Bubbles wakes up early because she heard sleigh bells, only to find the cookies not eaten, no presents, and a lump of coal in her stocking. Bubbles decides to investigate further.

Bubbles flies around every house in the residential area of Townsville, looking at other people’s presents with her x-ray vision. She goes to one house, she goes to another house, and then another, and another, and another, and so on. Remember when I said "worst example"? I didn’t get out of my seat and yelled "okay, I get it already!" I only thought it loudly. Honest.

At least there’s some payoff to this, as Blossom and Buttercup tell Bubbles that she must have gotten coal because she looked through other people’s presents. Buttercup tells her this again later on, leading to this great reaction from Bubbles. It’s just the way it’s animated; there’s no need for No Me Gusta. Well, there's a quarter for the "reboot jabs in original reviews" jar.

Rewinding a little bit, once they see that they got coal in their stockings, too, Blossom and Buttercup realize something is terribly wrong, too.

The Powerpuff Girls, after changing into their normal outfits off-screen, yeah, that’s it, go up the chimney to find Princess. Princess is flying, and it’s not because they didn’t know she couldn’t. Since Princess is the only nice girl in the entire world, Santa decided to give her what she always wanted, and give everyone else coal.

She threatens to fly all the way to Santa Claus to tell him that those three jealous girls that always denied her is now going to destroy Santa’s workshop in retaliation for their much deserved coal. Why would he believe her? Because she’s the only nice child in the entire world, silly! As she starts flying off, the Powerpuff Girls chase after after her.

There are boring ways to fill time, and there are good ways to fill time, and while the driver scene is close, there is no better way to fill time in the Powerpuff Girls than with an action sequence. They must have known this, too; almost an episode’s worth of time is spent with them racing towards the North Pole, them fighting, pulling each other’s hair, and much, much more.

There are so many highlights I can bring out of this, but I got to leave something out of the review or I'll be here forever. I should highlight one scene in particular, though: Blossom has ice breath, Bubbles has the ability to talk to animals, Buttercup can roll her tongue, what does Princess have?

Crown-controlled telekinesis! Well, Bliss isn’t so special, is she? Alright, fine, enough with the reboot jabs; I'm running out of quarters to put in the jar. As she throws this giant ice ball, she ends up splitting this ball into three, shaping it into her face. A neat touch.

Princess: Cool it, girls!

Even Princess is good at the one-liners.

In a speed more rapid than eagles, 8 minutes to get to the North Pole from somewhere in the US is rather impressive, they finally arrive at the North Pole. Yes, I timed it. They destroy everything in sight thanks to a hair tug caused fight. Princess ended up being right about the Powerpuff Girls destroying the workshop, as said earlier, though it was all her fault.

We get to see ol' jolly Saint Nick himself, except he isn’t so jolly. He's sad that every kid in the entire world is bad except for one kid. Maybe he shouldn't have skipped over the whole "he sees you when you're sleeping" part in the beginning. Considering how Bubbles is demonized for doing so earlier in the episode, maybe they didn't want to point out the hypocrisy.

How did they get Santa to believe that Princess is wrong, and they are right? Simple: all Santa needed to hear was that they were the Powerpuff Girls. Knowing who they are, but not knowing what they looked like; what kind of Santa are you? He's still cool.

Then again, Princess calling him "Santa Clod" probably helped with his next decision.

Santa realizes that, no, he doesn’t have to follow a list to know who's naughty or nice when it's clear to him. He tears the sticky note up. Who's to think that the only person that learns a lesson in this special is Santa? I can't even think of a time where that has ever happened before.

Well, there is one list that he will follow: the crew vanity Permanent Naughty List, as Santa noses Princess’s name on it. Maybe I should explain that: when he pokes his red nose, Christmas magic happens. I feel sorry for poor Bill and Ryan; Santa taught of them before thinking of that next guy.

Santa: Bum bum bum!

No, really, he says “bum bum bum” as the camera zooms into this face when he does this. Even with his utter lapse of judgment, I can still say this is one of my favorite portrayals of Santa Claus.

Another "bum bum bum" is that it's just too late; he's already done his journey. The fact that the workshop is in ruins doesn't help at all, but he doesn't hold it against the Powerpuff Girls. If only there were someone that can fly super fast.

The Powerpuff Girls become Santa for a year, saving Christmas like all those characters in the 80's. We don't see them go all around the world, just through Townsville's residential area. We can just assume the rest of the whole world didn't wake up to coal in their stocking, as the Narrator does.

We almost end on a joke with the Professor trying to wake the girls, but they're too tired having to do Santa's job in an inkling of the time it took Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, and et cetera. It could have ended with that, but that wouldn't have been as cheerful for a Christmas special, so they wake up and celebrate Christmas after all.

The Narrator ends the show like how every Powerpuff Girls episode ends, in a more rhymey and Christmassy way. Just wanted to highlight that because I miss it so much. Maybe I should make some plans for the new year.

Does it still hold up?

Minus a few scenes that lasted a bit too long, it’s a great special from start to finish with lots of actions and some creative humor. There’s not a lot of Christmas specials that can claim that, especially the former.

All I can say to end this review is...

Marry Krismas, Ms Kene.

#fpb ppg 1998 #powerpuff girls #cartoon network #christmas

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