#I’ve had involvements with people and I’ve had my heartbroken aplenty.

[rowanhoney]

.

#idk why I got hooked watching the couples therapy documentary #and it’s so interesting #but now I’m so glad I never let anything get serious that has so far come my way #I’ve had involvements with people and I’ve had my heartbroken aplenty. #but I don’t actually think any of those were losses #and I’m glad I’m picky af #god Pluto rly working hard on my Venus #i don’t think I’ve ever experienced the approach to my birthday with such high self esteem #this time of year usually destroys me #but rn idk i feel like a person who does have so much love and others can actually see it now #I don’t feel so hidden or misunderstood as I used to #and that always brought me such a fear that I would never find the people I want around me #and that id always feel out of place #but I’m feeling good I’m feeling secure!!! #and im so glad I’m picky . I’ve dated too many people who tear me down in the hopes I’d feel too low to leave them #and I’ve had people who I adored or had a really great ongoing rapport with. #who may have understood me fundamentally. but our attitudes were so misaligned and I couldn’t sacrifice my values like that #and also that I tend to attract and be drawn to people with substance abuse struggles when that is my trauma and one thing I cant cope with #im glad I’m a deeply reflective person and i understand myself and my situations so well actually #thinking again how I’ve seen friends in either unhealthy or senseless relationships and i just #am so grateful for my own strengths fr fr