#SO MANY IDWAS BUT FOR NOW | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

thelittlepalmtree · 3 years

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I have such a desire to make a blog for all the rp drama I've experienced. I was recently in a rp server (because this will be confusing I'll just say it was Harry potter) this server was marauders based, I prefer golden trio era. The admins in the marauders server had tons of characters and there was really one clique and everyone else was pretty inactive so I tried to be nice and make friends. This will be important later but I often felt my characters' words and actions were willfully misinterpreted to always make them the bad guy. For example I had a character constantly be called judgemental because she would say "the slytherins are being dramatic" but other characters were fine to say things like everyone in your family is trash. I had a ton of trouble plotting with anyone let alone doing something shippy. And for some reason the entire roleplay happened in the dm channels (a lot of rp servers have them, it's supposed to be like texting) and there were almost no threads. I posted many starters and got a total of two replies in the 2 months I was there. These problems were overlooked though because I'm chill if I have characters that I like.

So I decided to start a golden trio era rp, that's my favorite era and it's rare to see people in it. The two admins of the marauders server and a few other active members joined my server. It was fine at first and the two admins (as we'll call them) decided to play Harry and Draco respectively with the internet to ship them. This surprised me because I'd had a long conversation with the new draco mun about how fandom unfairly simps over him and he's never been held accountable for his crimes and we agreed. We were feeding off each other even.

Now I play Ginny since I love her and Hermione because she's a major player in the plot. Before I knew about Drarry I approached part 2 of our destructive duo because they had applied for Harry. I said what I would say to anyone. I have a lot of love for hinny but it's not my otp for ginny so we can do whatever you want and I'm good. Their response was "Harry's not good enough for Ginny, but I'm also going to apply for Michael Corner and maybe he could ship with Ginny" (more or less). This was deeply weird to me because if Harry, the person who saved Ginny multiple times and always treated her kindly and respectfully is "not good enough" for Ginny why is the guy that dumped her for being good at quidditch better? Like if she had just said "i Don want to do it because I have something else planned" I would have been fine with it but I wasn't interested in a consolation prize and I certainly didn't feel comfortable with the way it was discussed as though I was being done a favor. But okay,I'll let it go.

As we open the rp there's a death eater element and Ginny, who I'm playing as an auror,suspects malfoy of being one and says so publicly. I felt it was a foregone conclusion she would hate Malfoy,his dad caused the single worst thing to happen to her in her entire life. Is it fair to blame Draco for his father's actions? Maybe not but Ginny doesn't need to ve rational.

So as things go along there is no attempt to plot with people outside the three that came from the other server even though we're getting new people everyday. And I've had complaints about people trying to plot with them and feeling really left out. Meanwhile in character Harry publicly goes out for a drink with Draco and gets tacos with him. And Ginny and Hermione are like "wtf you're going out with someone who used to be a death eater, bully, and is seemingly still a racist (because at this point he indicated he still believed that purebred were better)?" And pushed Harry on this. And Harry (ic) got defensive like how dare you judge who I keep in my life!!

Hey guys, if my best friend started dating the high school nazi who let all his nazi friends into our school, supported them as they beat up my remaining friends, guarded the door while their aunt tortured me, called me a slur, and never once apologized for any of their actions, I would end that friendship. Yes. Even if we were close.

So this whole thing blows up when each of them.loses their mind at these in character attacks. Keep in mind, my characters have faced much worse attacks in their servers. Absolutely no responsibility is taken for the fact that there are all these intricate little plots they've supposedly crafted without telling anyone. The issue is just that Draco is being attacked in character for what he did at Hogwarts ( you know when he was committing acts of terrorism for his nazi cult) and Harry was being judged for dating him.

The conversation with the draco player lasted for HOURS and my co-admin who was acting purely as a mediator and had no dog in this fight was shaking because of how stressed she was and how badly this person behaved. I was ready to kick them as they'd clearly violated the rules, but she did her best to give them a chance. If I were to post the dms believe me you would feel the same but we're not there yet.

So we kick the one and the rest of the clique follows. Okay, whatever. Fast forward to tonight and they've started their own server clearly copying my idwa, they've even copied my ad. I wouldn't be surprised if they jut cropped out my name and put in theirs.

Y'all really think you're good guys here? Have fun jerking each other off I guess

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hutchismo · 2 years

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I think people at Academy forwarding my posts to Twitter no idea. One said good to go. They think I'm funny. Many good people there thought this going well. I don't know there are many ask them. Benjamin Della Ronan Carl the planetariium staffI Son AnnaJoe have no idea I just went to work. Fun place to work but they have bad folks too I insgibe somebidy weaing Acedemy vest woman in park recently guy kissing at baby in strolller lookibg at me kinda looks like Santos dad they ralkex badly about my dad did this to his dad,taunted me about mystery weapon and stealing my work driving me crazy like those diplonats semi truck in oark lobg story I'm not autustic I was told not to look at certain people it was an investigatiion I thought I've nothing to hide. One SFPD guy said alrighty at me after Serb beard guy. I don-t know ask him. Santos in park said outside craziness ehen I was seeing and reporting in mind. Pretty sure ne kbew all this his dad too bo udsa ask them. Oh yeah I don't think Katie food look at her tattoos I never have. She plays in a band. Oh yeah the 15 year old put her hand on my back during Russel Kwan from Mummies did at party but he could be fine no idea Jim Granato posted British band on FB day of Jan. 6 made me so angry. Dave Paling jis friend oh yeah Fozzie Ukiah grower I don-t kbow I don't care anyway Nellie Dorn in Sofa band Santa Cruz obe famous member Gillian Welch Rot scene San Mateo Ben Geddes Nudelmans Aaron Dave Dave Hawaii. Ask them no idea. Nudelnans tryst fund I don't kniw they were nice kinda all atandoffish I was pretty boring person and quiet usually I moked to much weed. still do. I did not commit crines in park. If I did in my sleep arrest me how would I know very much doubt I'm watched or would be dead. I don't know CIA tech will not speculate ask them. I'm not dumb.

They deleted mystery weapon and releasing clues about my work and stealibg it. That weapon has veen used on me nore than once near certain and agents here I think. Direcy ebergy I suggested getting decibal meters and frequency analyzer like in AV in my head. I think they did no idwa. It stops quick when I notice it. Rosanna mebtionex Tinnitus Oh yeah Jason Burke no udwa about Jason but he said sonething racist in PR and we sat and he stared at undrrage girl doing homework in coffee shop snapped photos of guy's girlfriend in beach I thought it was gross then and now , Robert Macdougal sonething he was exonerated guy from union Brian Goodspeed did his tine not accusing him at all just being honest. If girl un coffee shop said I atared he set me up to be there and I k ew it just like Gallagger and Claymore and talk to Scott Pearson he has a past he was never convicted drug trafficki g foreign he could have been lying to me to set me up get me killed not my friend.

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isaacathom · 4 years

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god im thinking about so many stories now... tdoc could be pretty fun, especially if the soul loss ‘mechanic’ is clearly established. youd get the one by accident (the mentor at the beginning who had previously killed a demon lord), then probably one of the protags later deliberately, because the reaction of a soul being spent would distract The Fuck out of the demon lord, and they were willing to pay the price if it meant the demon lord would die.

third time would presumably be the team up on the demon king where a group decide to all go together, hoping their combined soul will be enough to weather the impact killing such a powerful demon would cause. it does stand to reason that the impact of killing a demon king would be far stronger than killing a mere lord. so i feel like on the one hand, the team up should work, but kill all the participants, who get maybe a few moments in the aftermath to look at each other and the reinforcements and know they did it. like. demon lord saps more than half, right. lets say... 60, for sake of example. hence why tryig to kill a second one a) doesnt work and b) causes such a powerful reaction - you burn through your soul and it fucking explodes, almost.

so, say theres... 4 demon lords. and 3 heroes (as the 4th hero expended their soul to ensure the death of one of the lords, having killed either #1 or #2). each expending 60, they have 120. or if its 75, they have 75 of a soul. so either the king takes double, or the king just takes a full 1. if the former, the trio are dead no matter what. the reason they’re still able to kill the king is because of the soul reactions, which still deal damage, which means that the amount expended is... less? sort of? like, trio stabs, they get 30% in, n1 explodes and takes it to 40, they get 65 and then n2 takes it to 80, and n3 takes it home and their explosion seals the deal. all roughly simultaneously, but you get the idwa, right.

however, if we assume it only requires 1 full soul to take a demon king down, then the 120 version has a chance to make it if their souls are weighed as 1. which is also neat! thats the other hand! i like the idea of the trio surviving with the barest sliver of a soul each, dazed and in pain on the floor of this kings throne room, victorious and alive. unable to really appreciate what theyve done because theyre convinced its the end, that with each flutter of the eyelids the void approaches. passing out exhausted together at the foot of the throne, content in the knowledge that they won, and waking up confused some days later with no understand of how or why they were allowed to live. itd be guilt inducing a little, to know that if theyd teamed up with that 4th hero to attack the dragon, they wouldnt have died there, in that city that wasnt their home. but how would they have known that it would work? the choice to team up with pure desperation, the decision to injured warriors trying to gain something out of their seemingly inevitable defeat. their friend would not begrudge them the knowledge they had gained.

and idk! i guess it would depend on what kind of vibe the ending should have as to how fatal the attack should be. the worst ending, emotionally, is the one where only one of the trio makes it out, because while that makes sense if the final attack is viewed sequentially, like with the dodgy math above, it doesnt FEEL like that in the moment. so the survivor would feel like something is deeply unfair. and that stuffs interesting, but i feel like the survivors guilt-y angle can be explored just fine with the ‘trio survives and feels guilty about h4′ and its less... depressing overall. since killing the demon king shouldnt really be depressing. i feel like survivors guilt on that kind of scale is fucking depressing, if you catch me. it sort of sours that victory even more. if all three live, they can at least console each other. if only one lives, theyre alone in that experience. that fucking blows. i dont wanna write about. and while the ‘they all die’ ending is sad too, thats less depressing and more bittersweet. pyrrhic, etc. that feels like a sacrifice, done knowingly and with intent. not... by accident, or intentionally except one of you fucks up (sort of). right?

the two endings of ‘everyone lives’ or ‘everyone dies’ are good, i think. theres strength in both. itd be a matter of the tone of the rest of the story. and i feel like i gravitate towards sorta... lighthearted? not like joyous, at least two people are straight up dead here, but like... aware of joy. seeking joy. and that could go both ways for the ending! because there is a joy in victory, even if you don’t get to benefit from it. and the trio wouldnt, if they die there in an exhausted heap. but they won. and thats enough. and theres joy in that! theres a joy in knowing youve done well, and others are free. but the thing is that even if the trio live, they are convinced they wont. they all pass out on those stairs. i could even fucking fake out the audience by having the nex chapter from another character (preferably one who has been introduced previously as a friend or some such) a day after the kings death, where the trio arent mentioned until near the end when that friend goes to visit them. or something. it could be a fun fake out, but not purely for the sake of fucking with the audience, since it would mirror the assumptions the trio made when they committed to killing the king. they committed to dying together, successful or not, and they fully expected that they would never see the free world they made. they almost certainly imagined that freedom many times throughout the story, and especially at the end. the surprise is theirs as well. i think thats neat! though the fact the trio survived is probably telegraphed by the fact there is a chapter after their sacrifice at all? since ending on them collapsed at the throne feels like a fitting place to end it if they didnt make it. or even if they did! leave that idea hovering in the air. i dont know! i like the idea of exploring some of the immediate consequences of their success (such as the fact that island is almost certainly gonna vanish beneath the waves now) regardless of their fates. the destruction of the building they were in. all these bits. how everyone else finds out the demon king is dead, that sort of thing. that stuff is interesting, even if the long term effects arent going to be explored. the aftermath is interesting.

idk! i guess i just wanna explore what victory means? to both those who achieved it themselves, and those they did it for. so their ‘death’ would cover what they felt about their victory, their weariness and their elation, etc. and the chapter thereafter (essentially the last one) would be what the victory meant to their loved ones, regardless of whether they made it out. if the 4th heroes family/friends remain involved, including them would be especially important for highlighting the loss in winning, and even the friends/etc of the trio who did it, because even IF the trio made it out, theyre still out cold, souls and bodies drained. yknow? thered still be that threat in the air of will they die anyway? will all the soothing tonics and gentle hands in the world be enough? noone knows. everyones probably convinced that if they survive still, theyre at deaths door, hanging on out of stubborn desire to see their victory just once, but lacking the energy to make that happen. futilely trying to wake up. yknow? since many of those people would be familiar with the soul depletion thing, given the death of the mentor at the start of the story and the death of the 4th hero during its middle. noone has any reason to believe theyll survive, even if they really want them to. so if the chapter ends with that friends going to visit them where they lie in the hospital, sitting by the bedside of one and stroking their cheek and telling them gently of all the light theyve brought, and then that quiet soul stirs and gazes wearily at that friend, thats a surprise for everyone. it still means something. that the story would end very shortly thereafter, probably with a final line from the friend with some ~gravitas~ (like, yknow “you won. we’re so proud of you”, which i think works on a couple of levels) still leaves things open, its not unambiguously positive, but there joy there. theres satisfaction. theres a sense that no matter what happens to the trio, they Won.

god idk im just feeling gay as fuck thinking about the ending even though the friend is almost certainly not dating any of the trio, its just. the vibe. of adoration and respect. of that tenderness. god. its 1am it hits different at 1am to think about that kind of thing. god.

i gotta stop but this shit fucks

#story blogging #im on my bullshit again im sorry im just. im thinking about so many stories i dont know why #its nice. i want to enjoy it #and im thinking a lot about what victory means after reading Barracuda... i think its something to explore #like. the whole concept of pyrrhic victory is there. how it and 'regular' victory intersect is neat #whether you need to even know you won or witness what it causes or anything. i dont knoooowwww #i just wanna write that ending tenderness tbh. in my head its.. so its not the ending of lotr exactly but its got that aesthetic #open windows soft linens... god. i wanna be under a clear sky again. folks im feeling SOmething

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