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chocosvt · 3 years

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tagged by @gamerwoo & @secndlife!

if you were mentioned in this, then consider urself tagged oxoxoxo (unless u have already done it lol). i thought this was so enjoyable and a gr8 timeframe which lays out all ur progress + i luv reading the responses! thx for the tags!

01: first creation of 2020

split your heart, posted in february.

my last few months of 2019 were pretty rough, and i think i took a december hiatus? i didn’t actually get back into the swing of writing until after january! and i came back with an ANGST obviously!!

02: most recent creation of 2020

paint by numbers, posted in december.

this fic was a gift for my cwc secret santa!! it gave me an excuse to write more joshua hehe. HE HAS SIX FICS ON MY MLIST HE’S BEING SO GREEDY!!

03: one of your fave creations from 2020

i’m going to BREAK the rules and mention two fics, okay? okay. i would definitely say fireflies, my prince!seokmin au <3 enemies to lovers makes makes my heart flutter + because i love you, posted for jun’s bday! those r like... my comfort fics which r among the few of my works i can actually reread :_)

04: a creation you’re really proud of

CONNECT! this is my cyborg!au for vernita :-) i’ve always wanted to write an au of this sort but i could never get it quite right! then one day, the writing gods bestowed upon me this miraculous edge for writing sci-fi. WHO KNOWS WHERE THAT CAME FROM bc i don’t /// anyways, i luv the connect universe!

05: a new style that you tried this year and a work that used it

my style legit changes per every fic i write so i CANNOT answer this!

06: a creation that took forever

okay everyone already knows the answer to this IWFJEURF but of course it’s going to be honeyboy for mingyu ;_; that 54k behemoth!! i think it took me five months to complete + an extra month that went toward proofreading.

07: your creation from 2020 that received the most notes

fireflies, my prince!seokmin au. i think it’s abt ten notes away from 1k? which is verycrazy verycrazy. i honestly thought not many ppl were going to read that fic bc i don’t seem like the type to write royalty au’s! so i was shockt.

08: a creation you think deserved more notes

probably second life, my ghost!au for woozi! but it’s got some very serious/sensitive topics so i definitely wouldn’t push ppl to read this story!

09: a new fandom you joined and a creation you made for it

honestly, i didn’t join any new fandoms this year! i rly do not have the excess time like i once did ;_; i can only focus on svt and even then i slip so much! i also need to make time for myself bc there r many things i need to improve on. it’s partly the reason my presence on this site has declined a lot BUT no need to worry i always try to make time for my blog bc it’s very important to me!

10: a creation you made that breaks your heart.

NONE! my heart is unbreakable! just kidding. hmmmmm but honestly i rly do not know! i guess second life? but i don’t know. but it could be! but prob not. OH WAIT nvm I JUST REALIZED I HAVE AN ANSWER forgive me i am stupidt. heat and heartbreak for chan!! mwhahahahahahaha. it’s a break up!au.

11: a simple creation that you really love.

nine in the morning, my fwb fic for my sweet prince, mr moon jun! this was actually a shorter piece (which could have totally blown into smth HUGE but eurhfwuehf no.... it’s soft, fluffy and to the point! very rare find over here, guys.

12: a creation inspired by someone else.

@chanhao-s time travel!au for jeonghan helped me form the plot for second life, and the fact that woozi’s spirit had been preserved from the last century. i just LOVE time travel stuff even though i would NEVER DO IT!!!!! omg.

13: a favourite creation made by someone else

i’ve been giving ficrecs like crazy on this blog and i’m sure those authors r so tired of me crawling into their mentions like a ferret off its leash. SO INSTEAD I WILL GUIDE YOU TO MY FICREC BLOG BC IT HAS SOME OF THE JEWELS AND GEMS OF THE CARAT WRITING COMMUNITY / @chocoreads / + more to be reblogged when i have the time to leave my unnecessarily detailed comments.

14: some of your fave content creators this year

@ally-127 / @by-moonflower / @candyshua / @carat / @celestialpearls / @dinolovebot / @dinoshaur / @fallinnflower / @fluffysvt / @hansolmates / @jaeyoonurl / @kabira / @love-dreams / @luvshuas / @minkwans / @redevenir / @secndlife / @shionwrites / @shoshishua / @solarwonux / @sunlithues / @sunlightwoo / @tearsofsyrup / @thekidultlife / @thetypingpup / @wavesmp3 / @woozisnoots / @viastro

i tried my best to gather everyone who uploaded smth i fully enjoyed this year, and i’m so freakin sorry if i forgot anyone ;_; thank u so much for creating and putting pieces of urself out onto this dusty site for everyone to enjoy <3

15: and for good measure, a couple more creations of yours that you love

i mentioned pretty much all my content from this year except for the weight of blood + sweet poison! i don’t think i’m forgetting anything .... hmmmm, i probably am bc i have the recollective abilities of a deflated bag of potato chips. ANYWAYS! my heart goes out to everyone!! i luv you very much!

#lettuce see many happy moments in the new year guise #AND YES I'M REUSING THIS BANNER just pretend you've never seen it before and if you haven't then u're fine don't even worry #t:tg

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gotatext · 5 years

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claws my way out of the dirt like the goblin i am ..... hello thots, its nora, once again bringing you a revamped version of a muse i played yonks ago n some of u may have even written against... here is her pinterest.....

this is margaret greta, she’s a whole can of trauma spaghetti plastered over with a toothy grin and a lot of dad jokes. the only reason she’s in gifford really is bcos shes been put there as part of a witness protection program cos lots of police r monitoring livingstone so its deemed relatively safe.... haha... anyway she changes major all the time. she started off doing fine art but since then she’s done modules in architecture, film, bio-chemistry and is now dabbling in medicine.

CIS-FEMALE — ever hear people say GRETA O’DRISCOLL looks a lot like DIANA SILVERS? I think SHE is about 21, so it doesn’t really work. The MEDICINE major is a SOPHOMORE that is from DEADWOOD, SOUTH DAKOTA. They can be +CHARMING, but they can also be -EVASIVE. I think GEE might be SHEEP. They are living in YATES. ( nora. 23. gmt. she/her )

this bitch is the most restless creature u ever seen. before she came to livingstone, she’d lived in 8 different cities in 3 years.

was adopted as an infant. had two foster moms and two older sisters so always surrounded by women. lived in a boarding house, very much like the one in 20th century women, with lodgers coming in and out all the time, mostly artsy young women because her gay moms were both high school teachers trying to set up their own arts collective. one of her moms left when she was 4, n she doesn’t really remember her.

while living with entirely women made her super into catlin moran and the guilty feminist, as a teenager she often let boys walk all over her bc she just craved male attention jst bcos she’d never really experienced it. saw it as something aspirational, like sitting in the back of chad’s second-hand truck while he drove you to macdonalds and offered you and his five friends with identical haircuts weed was the height of being cool to greta, she wanted to be their dream girl, even if it meant compromising her beliefs

bubbly bitch but also massive snake. metaphorically and literally, always shedding her skin. loyal to few, ruled by none, out for herself, babey!! every place she goes, she becomes a new character, someone who’s a figment of her imagination, as if each city is repertory theatre and she’s a character actress, so as a result som ppl think she’s called rita, some ppl know her as margot, she just flicks through identities like nobodies business.

goes through phases of being intensely feminist and tweeting “men are trash i don’t need them” before flipping into being lonely and needy n wanting male attention again. tends to gravitate towards men who are just pieces of shit tbh like her friends are always like hun.... pick a nice boy..... but no.... she’ll go for the boxer with several arrest records for gbh or the small-town drug dealer just trying to hook her onto pills for a little extra cash, or the reformed sinner who thinks he’s being protective by reading all her texts and always knowing where she is..... n she always finds a way to spin it so that they Just Care About Her and aren’t a p.o.s

left school at 18 n didn’t go to uni, moved in w her boyfriend of the time instead, but soon got bored, n then went backpacking around the states making money in the casinos by being a shot girl (yeehaw) and trying to make it as a mysterious 1920s widow with a smoky voice, a dark secret n a heart of gold, looking for love in the big city. all she found was producers and acting agents who’d promise her stardom n actually just fuck her in a motel n then ignore her calls.

TW domestic violence, TW gun, her watershed moment came when she met luke in sioux falls while she was playing bass for a country n blues band. he was a few years older and had a car, and they kind of went from seeing each other to being that super intense couple who are just necking all the time.

they got engaged like 3 months after they met n rented a flat together, much to her family’s annoyance but she was 19 so there wasn’t much they could do. their relationship was super super intense though, often really heightened and when they fought it could become quite violent, but she’d pass it off as just him being really passionate.

one of their fights got really heated and greta threatened him with the gun he kept in the glove box of his vauxhall corsa, but the safety was off and she accidentally shot him. she pleaded self defence in the trial n cos of the amount of times she’d been hospitalised for various concussions n things like ‘fallling down the stairs’ the police were like yea... pretty watertight evidence that he was a bastard who [chicago voice] had it coming..... also this happened in 2017, he was mixed race and greta is white so naturally the police totally took her side. she’s now under witness protection, rehoused in livingstone as a sports-scholarship student, due to the amount of police involvement in the area, it would mean should one of luke’s family members try to track her down, she’d be relatively safe

massive sports fanatic. plays tennis. on the cheer team. was a track superstar in her high school. honestly just that sporty bitch, you’ll see her doing lines at a party at half four and then on your way to your 9am lecture you see her running across the park like a fresh fucking daisy who is this bitch

pretty easy to get along with (provided you don’t anger, provoke or question her too much) because she WANTS your character to be enthralled by her and will do whatever it takes to win them over. she wants everyone to love her

is That Girl who always knows where the parties are, and is always there, on the sofa, talking about institutionalised racism and trying to coerce you into a game of beer pong that she’ll definitely win. doesn’t really have one solid group of friends, just kind of on good terms with everyone and social butterflies about

has changed her major so many times. decision? who is she. currently studying medicine, but doesn’t rlly enjoy it. she’s very unmotivated and lazy and probably wouldn’t ahve bothered going to uni if she hadn’t been placed in one by a witness protection program. will probably change on to history or gender studies soon n just make up the extra credits by volunteering

massive feminist. low key quite scared of powerful men bcos of her ex. wants to start a female only lesbian commune bc she misses her childhood in a south dakota boarding house and has endless support for women. honestly annoyed that she is attracted to men, would so be 100% gay if it was a choice. cuffs her jeans and can’t drive. is That bisexual. skateboards. wears backwards caps. i hate her

plays bass guitar, has a teal green fender and it is her BABY. it’s covered in stickers about saving the planet and ending fracking and going vegan. she’s in an all-female punk band w agnes (n mayb jade i think) n they play gigs every now n then in grotty club basements full of druggy sweaty college kids

PERSONALITY: easy-going, sociable, observant, blunt, amiable, nihilistic, self-serving, laid back, independent, unmotivated, charming, lazy, impulsive, alluring. ESTP and a leo

LIKES: art, music, john wayne movies, black mirror, philosophy, cowboy chic culture, DC comics, arcade games, candyfloss, deep red lipstick, marijuana, dogs, karaoke, Kate Moss, late-night strolls, zip-lining, chemistry, suspenders, cigarettes, herbal tea, gallows humour, cold coffee, long showers, brown eyes, tchaikovsky, dr. seuss, boiler house DJ sets, magnolias, decorative lamps, worn-out furniture, twangy electric guitars.

DISLIKES: bananas, coffee, Woody Allen, mental mathematics, children, Trump, institutionalised misogyny, the imaginary future, french literature, Wes Anderson films, spoken word poetry, the general mentality of cheerleading squads (despite being on one)

aesthetics:

a bubble of pink gum on chapped lips, mom jeans, a beaten up pair of adidas, denim jackets, strawberry laces, knee-highs, chapped lips, peeling sticky plasters, split knuckles, bruises you try to cover with concealer, stick and poke tattoos, hot coffee, sleep caught in your eyes on a lazy afternoon, kissing girls, cigarette smoke shrouding you like a veil, alien conspiracy theories and sci-fi paperbacks, doc martens with fraying laces, the red string of a thong peaking out purposely from jeans, leonine arch of your back and that stellar smile that says ‘you have no idea who you’re dealing with’, a rucksack permanently packed for the move, a streak of red across your lips, roller blades, cut knees, not eating your greens, smiling with a mouthful of blood, and piercing your own ears with a safety pin when your mom wouldn’t take you, kate moss posters lining the walls of a teenage bedroom, his name scrawled in rage across the pages of a diary, thumb holes poked through the cuffs of your sleeves, a tennis racket you punched through in a fit of temper, feet pounding the earth until your soles bleed crimson, sleeping in a cherry lip balm and scrunchies to keep the wild locks from your eyes.

wanted plots: since greta literally can’t differentiate between romantic and platonic love, she’s got off with so many of her mates, so i want awkward friendships where they nearly dated, or exes that have now just turned into weird friendships, and girls from the cheer team who she’s like, weirdly intimate with like the shower together but its not a Thing cos the other girls straight, and I want like, fellow medicine students who are like?? how is this bitch still passing?? i swear she goes out every night?? she works part time at a fast food restaurant, i want a mate that just goes and sits in there talking to her until her manager gets angry. ppl she did a few modules with before changing course and somehow sort of remaining in touch with, like she did a few art modules, a bit of film, n some architecture before switching to medicine, though she’ll probs switch course again soon. ppl who she runs track with. someone she’s trying to make a zine with. here’s a list of plots on her old blog if u want any of them w her.

would love plots of any type, throw them all at me please, i cnt wait to interact w all of u. like this if u want me to message you about connections / plots! xo

full biography if u can be bothered

trigger warnings: drugs, domestic abuse, gun.

you never meant for it to happen. you’d heard the stories, of girls who let their man walk all over them, and thought to yourself “i’ll never be one of those girls…” the kind that eat low-fat yoghurt and drink slim fast to shred a few extra pounds because he said she was getting round in the tummy, or the ones who spent their evenings tied to a kitchen sink drinking wine while him and the boys played poker, wishing god, if only I could get out of here. not you, not you raised by strong women, four bright shining beacons. single mother with her hard-as-nails attitude and her stony glares, elder sisters (twins) one ginger, one blonde, one doctor, one lawyer, both determined to take a bullet to the brain and a hammer to the patriarchy before they let a man touch them without asking. you were always so inferior, so insecure and small, like a bird (like a sparrow) with blonde plaits down your back sucking tropicana whilst your busom buds sucked dick, their lips permanently ripe with stories of their sexual exploits, fake tan and glittered nails whilst you sat in the unbroken egg of virginity wondering what it was like to be loved. one day you found out.

lily milligan’s parents gone and a free house for the night, bottles of ouzo and tequila swiped from your mother’s liquor cabinet thinking she wouldn’t know (she always knew) your legs, hardened from pep squad, slut dropping on a kitchen table because the boys thought it would be fun to get the quiet girl drunk. you’d never had a sip before that night. band t-shirts, denim shorts and the split soles of rotten converse that you refuse to let go of, you still clutched with both hands to your youth, but in a tube top now (borrowed from alice carmichael who had a sister in college) and a short tennis skirt, your feet not in trainers but in thigh-high boots. uncomfy as hell but lily said you needed to look sexy. you didn’t know if you wanted to be sexy. you didn’t know what kind of girl you were, if you were even a girl at all. but robbie looked at you like he knew exactly who you were, like he knew you better than you knew yourself, and his lips had the pink cupid’s bow of a movie star, and his hair was dark locks, curling like a mane. his hands were soft, and suddenly on your waist, and after three more shots his lips were on yours and his name was the only sound in your head and on your lips as you lost it in lily’s college sister’s bedroom beneath the glare of a T-Pain poster. you bled for what seemed like hours, his hand still in yours, kissing on the sofa as truth tellers and dare devils continued to spin a bottle of unprecedented youth. you thought it was love. robbie was the one. he loved you, you knew it, how else could someone be so soft? but soon he grew bored, scrunched up your paper heart and set it alight. then came the tears, the hatred, the ‘fuck robbie, in fact, fuck all boys.’ and that you did.

you were known for being easy. any boy could be yours for a night, as long as he promised to love you for those few short breaths and pants before you cried yourself to sleep. you felt poisoned, but poisonous as well, as if by ensnaring these young boys you were gaining power over them, and not the other way around. soon it started to work. they’d want more, but you’d deny them it, sick of sucking off silly schoolboys, they’d call you a tease, a vixen. maybe you were, but you couldn’t help but want older men. you got the history teacher first time, him bending you over his desk to sneak a hand up your tennis skirt as the after-school clubs carried on next door, unawares. love didn’t exist, not for you. it was nothing but a game for pretty young girls to play, bubble gum in their canines and a hand tugging at the hem of their cheer skirt.

there was so much anger inside of your small body, ‘beware of boys and their hook-like words’. hockey helped. there was something formidable about the feeling of a stick like a weapon in your hands and the thwack it made against thighs in the heat of a scrum - “slipped, sorry!” - you’d utter with a snakeskin smile, millicent quinn knowing that you’d hit her on purpose because she shagged robbie at that party last week. she couldn’t prove it, cobbled acne on her forehead turning green with disgust. ben came into your life like a car crash. two years your senior, with a baseball jacket and shoulders like a god. he became your personal hero. on the pitch, he was lethal. together, you could bring anyone to their ruin. each day after last period he’d be waiting in his car. you’d leap into his arms like a girl-half starved, love me, love me, love me, your heated kisses the envy of every junior girl. he was yours for three blissful years, utterly yours, and you were his, his star-spangled girl, and he was your knight - you were both the same, playing games, always difficult to predict. it was a shock to all when he proposed, high-school sweethearts find love in south dakota.

the engagement was a bittersweet affair; three months – you barely out of your gingham print skirts and into a graduation gown, him, a surly quarterback towering above your sisters, cigarette at his lips and a scowl like a fart in a lift. they hated him. so did you. but you were eighteen and in love, and he fitted the cookie cutter mould. everyone wanted him, and you had him. you had him and you were happy, happy, happy, and he loved you. he said he’d give you the world, anything you wanted hand-picked and given to you. instead, he gave you a jack russell terrier and a flat you couldn’t swing a cat in, wallpaper peeling like the rotten bits inside of you, the bits that only he knew. and you got tireder and tireder of the sad excuse of a life he’d picked out for you, him out doing god knows what to pay the bills, and you dancing on tables to pave your way to stardom, and this was love, this was real, until the shine wore off and your fresh-faced, dimple-cheeked cheerleader facade faded and the ugliness started to reveal itself, the whining, the petulance, the sharp-tempered cruelty, the mind games, the need to always win, win, win. he was dull, he was boring, he was nothing like the boy the girls had said he was and no chiselled six pack could hide his lack of anything remotely interesting, your patience wearing thin until it snapped like rubber, a rucksack on your back, running shoes on your feet and the joint bank account emptied into your eighth grade birthday wallet.

you built your small fortunes working the casinos of sioux falls, a crimson dress and an attitude to match. bookish archie with his little dipper freckles was fun for a month, before he became just as dull and dreary as the rest. a three hour bus and you were in minneapolis, bright eyed and bushy tailed, fresh meat ready for the pickings. a hostel here, a friendly co-worker’s sofa there as you made what you could by taking off your clothes and shaking your ass like you were back in pep squad, doing what you did best. you met your fair share of creeps, and soon it was back on the road to escape a wide-eyed stalker and a restless itch for more. milwaukee, chicago, you made the roads your own. log cabins and lodgings, and the occasional motel, a beaten up pick up truck purchased at a scrap merchants – you got a few miles out of it before it bit the dust, and when you finally set it alight after nights spent lounging across the driver’s seat, a parka tucked over you as a duvet, you were sad to see it go. you’re nomadic by fault, never attaching to place, people or things, creating a new personality in every place you go like a character actress; each town is a different repertory theatre, and you’re the star. a compulsive liar, you even fib about your own name, to some you’re ellen, nineteen, bookish, a law student who likes smoking and cosmos. to someone else you’re rita, you’re twenty five and look young for your age, like smoking, comics and fucking in public places.

in the bright lights of michigan, you found charlie, sweet charlie, too good for you, though you let him spoil you while he thought you were the small town girl of his dreams. next came abigail, who was fun until the jealously kicked in, and then luke, gorgeous luke, dangerous, exciting, who despite his temper, despite the fights, despite bruises down your spine and your teeth marks on his arms, loved you with the strength of a wild fire. there was destruction in your wishbones, a savageness from the field, from the pitch and now somehow in his arms, you were godly. he was cruel, he was careless, and he refused to fall at your feet like so many other boys had, which only you made you want him all the more. you were rage incarnate. you hated him so fiercely you thought you might kill him, so he played the only card you wouldn’t predict; proposed.

the house you shared was a backstreet flat in detroit, you making your name as a downtown singer while he footed the bill with pills. they had a drug for anything these days, to dull the senses, to pick them up, to drive you to insanity or pull you out of the madness hole. the two of you lived like criminals on the run (you never told him that you were, living out your days as the enigma he wanted you to be), you with your voice like caramel and fishnet legs. you were his and his alone until his hand was at your throat and the gun was in your hands screaming at him to stop, stop, stop, until a bullet stoppered his brain, crimson staining linoleum as you cast yourself out like lucifer. self defence was decreed the moment they saw your violet neck, black tears and headlight eyes and mind screaming red, red, red like the pom-poms you shook so willingly in school and the insides of his skull. you were gone, and “you” was born, renamed “greta”, boxed, shipped-out, and next-day delivered to livingstone where under witness protection you were a student, blank slate, fresh-faced in a place where no one knew your name, doing what you always did and starting again.

#livingintro #this is such a long boi....... waht the fuck.... u dont need to read the bio the summary notes are long enough fuking hell

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prkrc · 5 years

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hey there demons! it me, sam! this is just parker’s same old intro edited with some updates and wanted / taken connections, so feel free to take a look if you’re interested! messaging me @ellvie is probably easiest!

DISCLAIMER: this is a sideblog so i might post stuff to the wrong acc sometimes js

so, this guy right here…riley ignatius parker-warrington…will throw hands if you call him anything other than parker. it’s what everyone calls him. you gotta be really special to call him riley and not immediately get decked for it. tbh most people probably think parker is his first name anyway so! moving on

parker was born to a wealthy family in a small but affluent village called alderley edge in cheshire, england. he’s the youngest of four sons so he has three older brothers.

his family, the parker-warringtons ( known more commonly as the warringtons ) are stupid rich. it hurts me to think about it askdh. they’re basically the british rockefellers. parker’s great x6 granddad started the family business back a couple centuries ago and nowadays they’ve got their hands in everything from business to architecture to real estate to education to oil…they own a lot of stuff. the warrington building in downtown london was completely made up just now is basically the rockefeller center of the uk.

the family drama has been highly publicized in the uk & europe for longer than anyone can remember at this point, but not as much in america.

anyway, parker spent his early years sheltered and pampered and homeschooled by tutors and nannies bc his parents never had time for him but it’s whatever he got over it really early on in life.

parker’s always been a huge troublemaker with a restless nature so his wealthy, uptight, lowkey shady af parents who are obsessed with the family’s image could never really deal with him and eventually decided to just ship him off to boarding schools all over europe, just one after the other after the other bc he kept getting kicked out lmao.

about the only thing he enjoyed about his childhood and schooling were his music lessons. he was taught to play piano, violin, and even the harp. other things like math and history and science didn’t come easily to him at all, but music? he was great at it and he’s always loved it. during his teen years while away at boarding school was when he first procured an electric guitar and learned to play. along with that, he also discovered punk music, aka the greatest thing in the entire fucking universe if you ask him. far as music goes, he’d found his calling in his early teenage years.

at school he was basically that rebellious kid in all the movies who wore doc martens with his prim & proper school uniform and carried around a pocket knife and cut class to go smoke while vandalizing school property and would absolutely fuck up some prissy pretty boy’s face just for looking at him the wrong way.

literally the only reason he actually graduated rather than flunking out was because his father was able to pull some strings aka bought his very last boarding school a whole new library wing. parker did actually consider running away a few times, but there was a part of him really reaaaaally deep down that actually enjoyed some aspects of school ( though he very strongly believes many education systems across the world need a serious overhaul and blahblahblah don’t ask him unless you want a lecture ). anyway, the moment he was done with school, he did finally skip out on…well, everything and everyone and ditched the country altogether, heading out first to seattle washington, then to los angeles, california, and then he finally settled in new york city when he was twenty years old, meaning that he’s lived in nyc for the last three years!

started his band, rabid porcupine, right after moving to the city. they’re a punk band, popular among the subculture and virtually unknown to everyone else. parker is the lead vocalist, guitarist, songwriter, overall face of the band but don’t get it twisted he could never go solo his whole band is important to him.

his parents have threatened to cut him off & disinherit him about a billion times but will probably never actually do it even though they see him as a huge disgrace to the family name. they call sometimes but he never picks up. if anybody asks he’d probably say that he hates his family but he honestly doesn’t. i don’t think he’s capable of hate lmao. he doesn’t like them and he’d rather stay away from them bc he and his family just do not get along, but at the end of the end of the day, v deep down he has like….a teeny tiny molecule of affection for them even though his family is 100% genuinely awful people

so, parker left nyc for a bit! even though it was only like a week ago in real time i wanna say he’s actually been gone for about two to three months maybe? idk but he went back to england in a rush, just kinda vanishing overnight as he tends to do.

he told no one where he was going or that he was even leaving at all. not even his roommate or…the person he’s very attached to, stas. he didn’t wanna tell anyone why he had to leave.

BUT WE’RE ALL GONNA FIND OUT RIGHT HERE AND NOW SURPRISE! his dad died. yikes. now they had a very…complicated relationship. parker hated his father and his father hated him. tbh his death wouldn’t have been enough for parker to go all the way back to england bc he fucking hates it there if it weren’t for the fact that his dad was pulling some fuck shit from the grave.

long story short, he left the family company to parker in his will. not the family, not his wife, not any of his other three sons. nope. the whole ass billion dollar company, every single subset, everything…was left to one riley ignatius parker-warrington.

naturally he was fucking furious. he hates the family business, he hates their company, he hates office work, and he hates knowing that his father only did it to spite him. he immediately attempted to get rid of the company. tried selling it, just straight up giving it away, even driving it into the ground lmao. just, anything to get it off of his hands and out of his responsibility but nothing has worked so far.

and that’s why he’s back in nyc! he wants a lawyer’s opinion so what i think parker is gonna do here? lowkey try to sneak into town, get some help from a lawyer he trusts and then leave without anyone else noticing or knowing that he was in town at all because he absolutely does not want to be here and he especially doesn’t wanna show his face. too bad for him!

lemme…stop? and just give you a few quick facts bc this is getting super long who’s even still reading this?

looks like he could kill you and could actually kill you

he hasn’t been home in like five years but he still has the heaviest most posh british accent you will ever hear in your life + he knows he’s fulfilling a stereotype here but he doesn’t care he fuckin loves tea

his three older brothers are named sebastian, nikolai, & rian. he doesn’t get along with any of them but he and rian he by far has the worst relationship with rian, his identical twin who’s a few minutes older. unlike most stereotypical twins they’ve literally never been in sync, have never gotten along and have probably beaten each other up before.

his family is big on modern day arranged marriages but you can miss parker with that bullshit he will date whoever he wants

that being said i think he’s probably…straight? idk tho & like who’s really straight anymore honestly

most people think that he’s a jerk bc he’s incredibly standoffish and temperamental but he’s actually…not that bad? like he’s sure he’s permanently grumpy but he also holds the door open for people and says thank you to janitors and probably helps old ladies across the street and would literally rather die than be rude to wait staff in a restaurant

seemingly very passionate about everything always openly expresses his emotions. he doesn’t…know how to hide them? he doesn’t know how to pretend like he doesn’t care?

adrenaline junkie, reckless af & likes to party but isn’t into hard drugs. he’s tried once or twice but just really isn’t a fan. he smokes & drinks & smokes weed sometimes but that’s it

very observant and good at reading people

basically the walking talking rl embodiment of the jerk with a heart of gold trope.

knows he’s not the easiest person to befriend but if you are his friend, then he’s gonna be loyal af, the realest ride or die of all time

however, he tends to take the tough love route when he’s trying to help someone out. like just bc you’re his friend he’s not gonna coddle you bc you’re upset he’s gonna tell you how to how to deal with your problems & emotions

which is funny bc lmao he’s angry af 1000% of the time. will throw hands anytime anywhere

so to the surprise as nobody he took up boxing as a kid and to this day it’s the only sport he cares about at all. he still boxes once or twice a week as a hobby & it’s probs pretty good for him tbh

also took a lot of music lessons back in the day. he’s actually a very talented pianist who probably could’ve gone on to play professionally if he stuck with it but nah. he likes the guitar. you’ll probs never catch him playing the piano which is a shame bc he honestly is a beautiful pianist :/

worked as an auto mechanic before he committed to his band full time but highkey misses it sometimes. he still likes cars & absolutely loves motorcycles, will talk about them all day with you if you want.

he has a motorcycle which pretty much built it himself from scratch and it’s just…it’s literally his child ok he will freak if you so much as lay a hand on his motorcycle ok /f r e a k/ like don’t even look at it the wrong way

feminist af

parker is grumpy and angry and standoffish but look he really is and really tries to be a decent guy. anyone who knows him well would see that very clearly and honestly, that’s probably why they stick around even though he can be difficult.

CONNECTIONS

family

future step sibling - genesis iver

maternal cousin, don’t get along - open.

paternal cousin, basically the only family member he likes - ingrid larson

romantic

ex girlfriend / highkey in love - anastasia sangster

ex on good terms - open.

ex on bad terms - open.

former toxic on / off relationship - open.

fwb - maia kauri.

former fwb - open.

platonic

best friend / ride or die - mason grey

roommate - open. please check the main for info on this wc!

close friends - reese monroe, kennedy drakos, isla thompson, open to more.

friends - warren daily, marnie almeida, sullivan ramsey, alexandra blakely, cameron jones, open to more.

unlikely friends - wren daily, open to more.

frenemies - rosalind cox, jake carver, open to more.

attempted good influence - logan van kamp

workout buddy - willow sparks

negative

enemies - lukas donovan, open to several. parker is a goblin so he could’ve pissed someone off for many reasons

ex friends - jay weston, open to more.

doesn’t like / trust - lex sinclair

since this is officially a novel i think it’s time for me to sTOP LMAO. i have no specific wc in mind but i’d love to plot so please feel free to message me if you’re interested! as always i’m super excited to plot and write with everyone!

#excessintro #death tw #mostly just for my personal reference but he could use some connections so pls feel free to take a look!

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drunklander · 6 years

Text

Drunj!Der Yells About Outlander

Thoughts on Ep. 309

*puts Lonely Island on repeat* Shipnanigans are here!

I was originally kind of not looking forward to the second half of the season because this part of Voyager is absolutely batshit bananas. But then I was wicked underwhelmed by the part of the season I thought I would love.

So fuck it. Bring on the ridiculousness.

I like this episode. But only if I try to watch it pretending like the first part of the season didn’t happen... Because if I watch it with the other episodes in mind, I just get mildly ragey that we skip over the important emotional work Jamie and Claire still have to do in favor of fluff followed by another separation. And yeah, I love fluff. I love secksi times. I love Fraser snuggles. But the jump from the end of ep. 308 to the start of ep. 309 leaves me salty that we’re yet again asked to headcanon the reconciliation between Jamie and Claire. *side eyes the similar jump between ep. 207 and ep. 208* Whatever.

Get your towels ready it's about to go down. Everybody in the place hit the fuckin’ deck. But stay on your motherfuckin’ toes. We runnin’ this, let's go.

New credits! And the title card... Take a good hard look at the motherfuckin’ boat.

Ok this opening bit. Like Jamie was an asshole for the last two episodes. Claire never actually got to tell her side of things. She basically was like nope, I don’t think I even want to be here. But now it’s like all good, she’ll go on this 18th century sea voyage to find Jamie’s nephew. For real? They couldn’t have made a handful of tweaks last week and the beginning of this week so she could say she was going because she wanted to be with Jamie and keep working on their relationship? And Jamie’s apparently never going to apologize for being a massive piece of shit toward her? They do a good job over the course of the episode of showing them together but still with the insecurities and stuff, but jumping from where they were on the cliff to where they are in this episode makes me side eye the show like whoa.

And yes, I know that she’s really going on the ship because she wants to try to make it work with Jamie, but geez, let her say that. Let her tell him that he’s been a dick to her but she knows he has it in him to be not-shitty and she’s going because she thinks he can be better than he is in the last couple episodes. I don’t know why it bothers me so much when they make us fill in the blanks ourselves on stuff that seems definitely important enough to actually show. And then make it seem like we’re dumb or bad fans or something for wanting to actually see things instead of just headcanoning them in, because that’s how this production team rolls.

Replacement Rupert and Angus just aren’t the same as the originals. Like no one can replace Rupert and Angus, but like, I can’t bring myself to give a crap about these randos?

For real though, Claire’s inner monologue is probs like yeah, never thought I'd be on a boat. It's a big blue watery road...

And I get her 20th century scoffing at superstition, but like, girl. You’ve been in trouble for being a “witch” enough times now that c’mon. Don’t act like you don’t understand what’s going on with the sailors.

Marsali is my everything. I love her. I love her so much.

As much as I want Jamie to stand up for Claire, I do like that Fergus does it. Because Jamie, my dude, you deserve everything Marsali’s throwing at you.

Claire’s “No. You don’t.” as she drags Jamie away is also my everything.

Oh hey, a trunk of clothes! Got some swim trunks, and some flippie-floppies. But not a nautical themed pashmina afghan in sight. Welp. Can’t have everything.

I know it’s supposed to be sweet that Jamie wouldn’t let anyone get rid of Claire’s clothes. And a nice inverse to Frank burning her clothes. But I’m still just kind of chuckling because it’s not like he ever saw them? What with him living in a cave and then prison and then Helwater and then with Laoghaire. But whatever.

“Would you care to dine with me this evening? We drinking Santana champ, cause it's so crisp.” This captain is seriously the human equivalent of ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. Like dude. You’re the captain of the ship and you’re just like welp. Can’t do anything about the men. They’ll do what they’re gonna do. It’s not like I’m the one in the position of authority or anything.

High fives to Fergus for calling Jamie on his bullshit revisionist history.

Although it’s kinda icky that Jamie knows all of the girls who Fergus has banged? And also fuck him for being super chill about Fergus banging tons of girls but so fucking uptight about Marsali and Bree. I know, I know, it’s a different time. That doesn’t make him not a hypocrite though.

Slash Jamie’s the last person who should be lecturing *anyone* about the importance of honesty right now. But whatever. No real consequences for lying soooo... *pretends the last few eps haven’t happened*

Yi Tien Cho convincing Jamie to do acupuncture is also my everything. Seriously, I know I had a *rull* low bar for how that character was going to be changed, but I’m really, really loving him.

I for real can’t wait for more of Claire and Marsali. Like yeah, Jamie’s marital status *was* Claire’s business, and Jamie hadn’t been living with Laoghaire and the girls for ages so Claire also wasn’t really breaking up a family or anything, but I really like that Claire just lets Marsali’s comment slide. Like call Jamie out on all of his bullshit, please, but Marsali’s a teenager whose life was thrown through a loop and I feel like trying to talk to her when she’s in this kind of mood isn’t going to get anywhere. So by just being like “well the whore should get the bigger bed, shouldn’t she” it’s like telling Marsali that she’s not going to be cowed by the snark and also that she doesn’t need to justify her place in Jamie’s life to a rando. Like she’s not going to concede power by trying to explain herself to Marsali.

But for real, I love Marsali.

I honestly don’t get Jamie’s aversion to Fergus and Marsali though. Like they’re not making the age difference a thing in the show. And Jenny’s fucking kids have apparently been married and spitting out babies since they hit puberty. Like I get it makes for some tension with Laoghaire, but who gives a fuck? She hates them all already?

Claire and Yi Tien Cho are my favorite pair that I was not expecting to like so much. But like her being genuinely interested in his story and him being open with her, which is probably the first time he’s gotten to talk like that with anyone since he got to Scotland, is so great.

Oh. Another VO. Cool. It’s basically like I'm on a boat motherfucker take a look at me. Straight flowin’ on a boat on the deep blue sea. Bustin’ five knots, wind whippin’ out my coat. You can't stop me motherfucker cause I'm on a boat.

Ok this insecurity in Jamie about hurting Claire’s feelings about the tea and acupuncture is adorable. Asshole Jamie’s insecurity of the past few episodes wasn’t. He was just an asshole.

And also, broseph, this is the kind of secret it’s ok to keep. Small, insignificant, adorable. The other one, not so much.

“My return has been confusing and frustrating. But it’s never been a question of whether I love you.” Confusing and frustrating is putting it a bit mildly, Claire, but apparently we’re done having real talk and Jamie doesn’t have to own up to being a fuckwad. Bqhatevwr. (Don’t get me wrong, I’m 1000% here for the fluff in this episode. I just have to pretend they actually did more of the hard convos in order to get to where they can have the fluff again.) And I’m pretty sure it *literally was* a question of whether you loved this Jamie, Claire. We all know you loved the old Jamie. But like, the whole thing on the cliff was literally about whether you loved the new Jamie. Y’know. The thing they never bothered addressing beyond the question being asked. Because lol nothing matters, fans can headcanon it and if they don’t they’re whiny and #badfans.

Whatever. *actively doesn’t think about past episodes* Here for pincushion heart eyes. Lookit how cute they are.

Cause of death: Claire telling Jamie about reading Bree Goodnight Moon.

And I love them talking about the moon like with the science of men flying there and the folk tales of the man in the moon representing each of them. They’re gonna fly this boat to the moon somehow. Like Kevin Garnett, anything is possible.

“You miss her.” “Terribly.” Glad they’re highlighting Claire still feeling the loss of what she gave up to come back to Jamie. Still salty at his non-reaction to learning about his kid. And even here, like one line from him about Bree to let Claire know he loves her too? Or thinks about her too? To let Claire know she’s not alone in missing Bree? Please? No? Ok.

Here for the cuddles. I want the fluff. Believe me, I am trash for the fluff. I just wish again that the fluff felt more earned because they’d actually come to an understanding about where they stand with each other rather than just glossing over the hard part of coming back together. They showed the angsty set up then skipped the resolution and went straight to the fluff.

Whatever. Back to pretending the last few eps didn’t happen. Give me all the fluff. It’s fucking wonderful. I love fluff. I am a broken record.

I feel like the gif of Claire saying “that’s insanity” is going to come in quite handy...

Jamie going to save his dude like fuck land, I'm on a boat, motherfucker. Fuck trees, I climb buoys, motherfucker. I'm on the deck with my boys, motherfucker. And no one is gonna mess with his Ardsmuir boys.

Really reaching to fit some of these lyrics in and I’m not at all sorry.

The way they chant Jonah is def the angry mob way to chant it, but in my head I def kept being like Jo! Nah! Jo! Nah!. Like pumping someone up at a sports thing or something. You’re doing it wrong, brain.

I have a lot of feelings about Yi Tien Cho giving up his story and letting it go before he wanted to in order to save Jamie and his men. Yi Tien Cho really is the best of them.

And honestly Jamie telling the captain to let YTC speak is maybe the most decent thing he’s ever done for the man.

And then the papers fly off in the wind and I realize that I give not a single fuck about the actual plot of this episode.

But Claire saying thank you to Yi Tien Cho is so much more than just thank you for quelling the fight. Like this guy just told the story of his life, of where he’s from, and now he needs to give it up. And she recognizes and respects and appreciates what it’ll cost him to give it up since she too is from a place the fuckers on the ship couldn’t possibly understand. And he did it for this group who, as he so passionately said, thinks the worst of him. I have so many feelings about Claire and Yi Tien Cho, guys.

They kept in the ship quickie! I def thought they were going to cut it! Bless them for keeping it. Blesss. Same feelings about the rest of the fluff still apply, but this show is probs always going to pull stuff like this so I clearly just need to get over it and accept the fluff I’m given like a #goodfan.

Jamie’s like believe me when I say, I fucked a mermaid.

(I swear, I *hated* the line last week when Jamie said Jenny would sooner believe Claire was a mermaid than from the future, but at least it means the most ridic lyric in the fucking song fits perfectly.)

And Jamie being cute about Claire’s hair. Awww.

I hate the king of men line. Hate it. Hate that the production is so fixated on that. And that they think it’s cute to keep including their weird in-jokes in the show itself.

But whatever. Snuggle time! Yay for snuggles! Embrace the fluff! Forget your issues with the show! Stop being a sourpuss!

Oh snap, the British are coming! Never thought they’d see the day, when a big boat comin’ their way.

RIP Lt. Babyface. Long live Capt. Babyface!

Yay for Claire telling Jamie about her oath. And yay for Jamie actually getting it and respecting what she needs to do. It’s like ep. 306 Jamie again with the whole respecting Claire’s calling thing. So like, we should just ignore ep. 307 Jamie? Because he was an asshole about it.

Oh man, next week is gonna be rough, isn’t it. *All* the puking. This ain't Seaworld, this is real as it gets.

For real though if the puking noises next week are like the brothel noises in ep. 306, I’m going to just watch on mute or something with the closed captions because it’s over the top, show.

Ok if Thomas Leonard is Capt. Babyface, I guess that makes Elias Pound Midshipman Fetus.

Oh man the cook being all like I'm flippin’ burgers, you at Kinko's straight flippin’ copies. Don’t fuck with Claire when she’s in Dr. Claire mode, my dude. You will not win that fight.

Yeah. If I pretend like this episode is the first one of the season, I like this episode. I’m kind of pissed that the show managed to make me salty about fluff. I love fluff, why you make me salty about fluff, show? And now I just want a goddamn fluffernutter.

And since I’m ignoring everything that could have been up until now, it doesn’t bug me that Jamie and Claire are separated...again. Because lol nothing matters.

Fucking give me all the badass Dr. Claire you have, show.

She’s on a boat motherfucker, don't you ever forget.

#*#drunj!der yells about outlander #outlander starz #outlander 3x09

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aceofwands · 7 years

Text

it wants to give us the exciting parts and the emotional pay off without actually doing any of the work, is the best way I can think to explain it Ria hateblogs Discovery: Episode 7 “[Poorly Written Time Travel] Magic to Make[s] the Sanest [Wo]Man Go Mad”

liveblogged to @kendradaynes

we had entirely 'last time on Discovery' before the intro credits, like not even a teaser ...

kendradaynes... That's an unusual choice

aceofwands I thought so too!

it was just Mudd being left behind on the Klingon ship. probs cause Mudd is gonna show up (we saw in the teaser last week). seems an odd choice too, like it was only a couple episodes ago, we haven't forgotten what they did???

close up of Michael's face, giving a personal log

oh lord

already paused it to write an awful line of dialogue down: "despite my fears, I seem to have found my place on this discovery"

discovery of WHAT

the dialogue is so bad Shin, so bad

kendradaynes..... What? That is...That makes angsty teenage fic seem well written

aceofwands: she's talking about the ship's settled into routine ... which ... what? aren't they in the middle of a war?!!!!!!!!

and about how she's made a friend in Tilly, and how she's taken comfort in her work

and how "this ship has become the most important weapon in the Federation's arsenal"

and I can't even

it doesn't even feel like they're at war! the way they go around on this shiny ship and talk about how it's settled into routine??????

kendradaynes... I want to send them all of DS9 s7 and Voyager's Year of Hell 2 parter and maybe Enterprise season 3 to show WHY THAT WOULDN'T WORK

aceofwands: Stamet's wacky drive piloting ability has "Given him access not just to unseen parts of space but his personality as well" and like ... that's a worry! WHY IS NO ONE WORRIED ABOUT THIS

kendradaynes THAT IS NOT A GOOD THING GET THAT MAN TO A PSYCHOLOGIST

aceofwands I keep pausing this ONE PERSONAL LOG

she confesses she finds some members of the crew more interesting than others (lol what others, they feel even more like background characters than any of the other shows somehow???) and it's her talking to Voq-Tyler

(people online have been debating how it's too obvious that he's Voq, but I don't have any faith in these writers not doing the really fucking obvious)

"Lt Tyler has suffered so much and still maintains such dignity and kindness" I really really hope he actually is Voq like wow I want them to be this bad at writing (and nothing I've seen so far makes me think they're any good at it)

“I fear my personal history interferes with my ability to forge relationships. I am among the others yet also apart." I can't get over this, it's like bad self-insert fan fic (I'm not even 5 mins in lol, I'd better let her finish her stupid log and stop pausing it lol)

oh lord, she's facing one of her greatest challenges so far ... they're having a party

they're ... playing ... beer ... pong ... on Star Trek

this is like a gross noisy college frat party ... on Star Trek ...

why is Michael not wearing casual clothes ...

kendradaynes... #weneedtheorville

aceofwands Orville's party in Pria had more dignity??? which y'know, the show is full of dick jokes

oh it's okay though, Tyler is giving a speech

wait did he just point to a guy who's "sacrificed for us" who had some sort of disability? I went back - there's a guy sitting on what I think is supposed to be a futuristic wheelchair I guess?

how did we get from It's Only a Paper Moon to this?

kendradaynes There are also... Very few disabling things that can't be at least partially cured by the 23rd century

aceofwands yeeeeah my thoughts exactly. but it was unclear and part of a dramatic speech so

Tilly left Michael and Tyler alone together at the party, but they were asked to report to the bridge

I still don’t know why everyone loves Tilly ... she doesn't seem like a cadet, unless you count the AOS crew as cadets ... again, everyone's too 2017

ummmmmmm. so Michael and Tyler were walking along the corridor. when she bumped into Stamets and knocked a container of whatsits over. and he hugged her and asked why she's apologising for a random moment that makes life so gloriously unpredictable and WHY IS NO ONE CONCERNED FOR HIM

kendradaynes... That makes sense. He sounds high

aceofwands ohthe Doctor has just shown up in this conversation out of nowhere. "I deeply apologise for my partner, lately he's been acting ... different"

WHY ARE YOU HERE IN THIS RANDOM CORRIDOR DOC! YOU WEREN'T WALKING BESIDES STAMETS??? WHY DID YOU TURN UP JUST TO BE PART OF THIS CONVERSATION

(I keep pausing it, I'm only 7 mins in, I might uh ... stop pausing it and try to keep up lol)

kendradaynes There are so many plot holes in this show

aceofwands they made a cybernetic augment for his arm??

then they asked what the deal between Michael and Tyler is ... and I just ... why is this show ... so ... clumsy? there is no nuance, no subtlety, it’s like they have to hit us over the head with everything like MICHAEL AND TYLER LIKE EACH OTHER OKAY AUDIENCE, DO YOU GET IT?

kendradaynes Honestly it feels like 18 year old self-insert fanfiction

aceofwands cut to the bridge. Saru and Lorca found an unidentified signal ... its some sort of biological space organism

which Michael knows a lot about

kendradaynes Of course. Because she knows everything

aceofwands protocol requires them to take care of it, because it's endangered, which is nice because actual Star Trek things

and um what

kendradaynes I hate her, jsyk

aceofwands they just beamed it into the cargo bay???????????????????

IT LIVES IN SPACE

IN VACUUM

HOW WOULD IT SURVIVE IN ATMOSPHERE AND GRAVITY???

kendradaynes welp that thing would be dead

aceofwands OMG IT HAS A DEMOGORGON FACE

some dude in a helmet hitched a ride inside its mouth and used it to get on board

its killed a bunch of people, but Michael escaped

oh its Mudd, to no one's surprise

kendradaynes Of course. Because self insert

aceofwands "did you really think you could leave me in a Klingon prison and suffer no repercussions?"

what have they done to his character

good fucking grief

kendradaynes*sigh*

aceofwands he's come here to find out why the Discovery is special, and is talking about how he's gonna sell it to the Klingons, but "not this time". so Mudd's causing a time travel loop. exploding their ship. the Discovery is blowing up. but now it's back to the party

this sucks

usually I LOVE time loop episodes

they're usually so fun! but this show is boring and dumb

oh man ... if you're gonna repeat scenes ... THIS IS THE BEST YOU'VE GOT???? them walking along a corridor talking

OH LOL it's Stamets. he's the only one who recognises the time loop. and everyone thinks he's crazy! "I need all of you blasted people to start listening"

why is this episode not about Stamets talking to someone?

why wouldn’t they listen to him???

Michael's all "oooooh how did Stamets know what it was going to be???"

.....had to pause it. Michael requested being in charge of the operation. Lorca: "I don't give a damn, I just want it done". then Tyler requested being in charge for security. and Lorca: "I still don't give a damn"

this. is. not. Star. Trek.

seriously

when there was a time loop on Next Gen and they started realising they HELD A FUCKING STAFF MEETING! and they realised through the poker game, which was clever! and everything about that was more fun and impressive than this shit has been in the first 15 mins!

the spore drive just activated, and they're all like 'why is this happening?". but obvs Mudd's in engineering

Tyler and Michael are threatening him with phasers, but haven't shot him on sight. oh they finally did. but there was a forcefield. Mudd's trying to figure out how the drive works.

Michael: "You are mad."

Mudd: "No, I'm Mudd."

WHY

I wish the idiots who wrote this garbage would get stuck in a time loop and forced to watch this awful episode over and over until they figured out how to stop it from being so bad

then he yelled at them to tell him how to work it AND STAMETS WAS BEHIND HIM AND SHOT HIM IN THE BACK. and said: "As days go, this was a weird one" which is hilarious

except that I'm not even 20 mins in and somehow bored?

how can they make time loops boring?

they keep saying different things???? in the scenes????

is it a time loop or isn't it?

do they know or don't they?

this doesn't make sense!

kendradaynes That's... not how a timeloop works. It only changes when they realise it

aceofwands yeah it's clearly trying to jump to the parts later on, cause Stamets implies that they've looped many times already. but instead - as usual - it just comes across as .. confused? muddled? like it's not really a time loop because they clearly know it's a loop enough to change what they say, but not enough to realise they're looping???

kendradaynes Yeah that's not how time loops are meant to work and I'm mildly vexed

aceofwands Mudd has got Lorca to come down with him "I really can't take it from the top again Lorca"

ummmm Mudd's talking about how he's explained this to Lorca before, but needs his help to access part of the ship ... if he's aware they're looping then ... why is he so bad at ... I don't even know .... [I stopped being able to explain everything wrong with this episode’s plot around this point]

this episode is a primer in How Not To Write Time Travel

Stamets is explaining how he thinks he's outside of the loop: "it's getting really hard to keep it straight" lol

he needs Michael to talk to Tyler but they're about to loop, and Stamets wants her to tell him something so she'll trust him straight away next loop. and she did??? and he made a sad face and said he was sorry

don't make me have feelings with your decent acting Anthony Rapp

but also do they not have protocols for time travel or like anything else to share???

"now is usually around the time he kills the Captain" - can we stay in that when we fix the loop lol

"you kill a Starfleet captain they lock you up for ever" ummm do they really

LOL WE'RE GETTING ALL THE LOOPS WHERE MUDD KILLS LORCA AND IT'S ACTUALLY REALLY SATISFYING WATCHING HIM DIE

HE'S EATING A SANDWICH AND HAD LORCA BEAMED TO SPACE

53 TIMES LOL

AHAHAHAHAHAHHAA

OKAY

ACTUALLY HILARIOUS PART

loop back to the party: Michael and Tilly talking. Stamets appears, taps Tilly, "I just spotted the hottest guy over there and apparently, he's in a band! Have fun!" (she was explaining earlier how she used to be into soldiers but is lately into musicians, cause that's what passes for character development on this awful show)

genuinely made me laugh

Michael's secret is that she's never been in love ... which we knew from the way she acted earlier in the episode??? not even a secret

HIS DIALOGUE IS DIFFERENT

THIS ISN'T HOW TIME LOOPS WORK

oh that was enough for Stamets to prove he was telling the truth ... and she now has to talk to Tyler about mudd?? idk it's super unclear why this is happening or what they're hoping to achieve ?????

honestly this episode is a terrible muddled mess

...................had to pause it again

to explain this scene

I'm leaving out so much and you're probably confused (I'm watching it and I'm confused)

she blew her chance to talk to Tyler because she likes him, which Stamets points out, and she says she's out of her element, so he says 'dance with me, for science, so I can see what I'm working with ... 'and like .... helping Michael talk to the guy she likes .... .... so they can save the ship from a time loop ... is the worst idea for a Star Trek episode I've ever heard. and I've watched Threshold

stupid space lizards make more sense than this plot

she's wondering how people make connections

and Stamets is explaining how Dr Culber and he got together

because the Doc was humming terrible opera

I ... I ... this

I can't Shin

you'll have to watch this dumb show with me if you want to make sense of it

I have to go back and attempt

no I'll just type out this conversation

see if it makes any sense to you

kendradaynes This sounds like it's impossible to make sense of even while watching

aceofwands

"Hugh and I fell in love after I told him to get lost."

"That doesn't make any sense."

"Love isn't logical." (they're slow dancing while this happens)

"I was in a wonderful cafe on Alpha Centauri when three seats down comes this hideous humming. Have you ever heard someone try to hum Casselian opera?"

"I can't say that I have."

"Well I told him to stifle it or sit somewhere else. Instead, he sat right next to me. And he's been there ever since." [Michael looks as confused as I am]

"After such a rude exchange. Why would he do that?"

"I told him how I really felt. And he did the same. And we liked that about each other."

"I'm good at honesty."

"Never hide who you really are. That's the way relationships work."

... ............... I have no words for how little this scene makes sense. that is not how relationships work???? that is a terrible way for them to get together???? and most importantly WHY ARE THEY SLOW DANCING (hint because they realised having them stand around the corridors was fucking boring probably)

kendradaynes THAT IS NOT HOW RELATIONSHIPS WORK

aceofwands I KNOW RIGHT

THEY'RE OUT OF TIME ALREADY? NO WAY IT HAS BEEN HALF AN HOUR

lol Michael is pulling Tyler away to dance in this time loop, the lighting is very purple with lots of close ups of their hands on each other

had to pause it again I am dying of bad laughter at the nonsense

they're dancing and it's kinda sweet and they've got an almost hint at a sexy vibe .... and then Burnham goes "So I hear you were locked up in a Klingon prison cell with Harry Mudd"

whyyyy are they not having a staff meeting about this?

I mean I know Lorca is a jerk and all. but this approach makes ZERO SENSE! she's telling him the whole truth, while they dance ... Stamets is watching and looking bemused ....

Tyler is like "why would he think I'd trust you?"

"Because I like you. And he thinks you like me too."

and he's like 'oh ... tonight's gotten weird but also very interesting'

WHY DO NONE OF THEM ACT LIKE REAL PEOPLE?

like ... how is it that Shakespearean, larger than life characters in previous series somehow feel more real and genuine????? these people just SOUND LIKE THEY'RE IN A TV SHOW????? like it sounds like TV dialogue!

I can't explain it

"if time really is repeating, this won't matter" and he kisses her. of course.

maybe less dancing more saving the ship?

they're talking while dancing "he used to brag about robbing a Betazoid bank"

!"a non equilibrial matter state" - a time crystal, which she learned about at the Vulcan science academy. which they haven't been able to perfect, but a 4 dimensional being must have perfected it, according to Burnham

good thing she knew all of this ??????????

IT'S SO BADLY WRITTEN SHIN

WHAT THE FUCK

there's no figuring anything out!

they just already know!!!!!!

cut back to the bridge, wondering where Michael and Tyler are. Mudd appears, playing music

hahahahaha the computer addressed him as Captain Mudd: "I never thought I'd say this, but I'm actually tired of gloating"

he's found a weaponised dark matter ball in Lorca's stash of dangerous shit. and he's blabbing on about it "and if any of you were planning on being heroes - including you, random communications officer man" LOL (the guy just ran up to try to stop him) "you'll find there's very little I don't know."

Tyler and Michael burst out onto the bridge for some reason ????

tried to shoot Mudd, the forcefield is still there ... he chucked the dark matter at Tyler .... who dissolved ....

Mudd: "well that was new"

why would they listen to him? Michael you KNOW IT'S A TIME LOOP

STAMETS WHAT ARE YOU DOING

WHAT

THE

FUCK

he told him to stop, because he can't watch Mudd kill any more people

I PAUSED IT UNTIL I STOPPED FEELING CONFUSED BUT I DON'T THINK I WILL EVER STOP BEING CONFUSED

why

would

tell

Mudd

what kind of plan ....

why did ....

why

kendradaynes Is your brain broken?

aceofwands yes

Stamets gave himself to Mudd????? even though he knew it was a time loop?why would he do that?

Michael has figured out the space whale has a ship in its belly .... with Mudd's crystal energy source in it .....

how .... does Michael know about Stella ???? I can't explain this episode to you any more Shin ... you'd have to watch this nonsense for yourself

she has come to sacrifice herself .... because the Klingons want her more than the ship

"you'll get a lot for this ship, but what would I be worth to them?"

"what's in it for you?" "Lt Tyler" "Lt Tyler is dead" "Not for long" ... and then she ATE A DARK MATTER BALL .... to force him to reset the timeline ....

NO NO NO NO

HOW DOES STAMETS KNOW

WE DIDN'T SEE HIM AGAIN AFTER HE WENT OFF WITH MUDD

SO HOW DID HE KNOW TO TELL MICHAEL HER OWN PLAN

or are we supposed to believe she remembers?

this episode MAKES NO SENSE

has Stamets finally told the Captain? why is he on the bridge

yes ... she did tell them .... everyone there knows and Mudd's confused

Lorca greeted him "Captain Mudd, your chair" - offers his chair

he realised Stamets was "passing on notes"

"don't try to con a con man" "I'm not, I'm negotiating with a business man"

"why would a Federation Captain do that?" "I will not have a repeat of the Boran [sp?] [his past ship]"

this episode is complete rubbish

he's leading Michael and Stamets off to the transporter room to meet the Klingons

lol Stamets has found out about his wife Stella. they found out he's been running from Stella, not to her lol

this episode would have been clever if the time loop wasn't so poorly done!

they rewired the captain's chair to send the message to Stella and her father .... who's come to get him lol

why ... why are they even doing this? they're so obsessed with making a new Star Trek series, why keep bringing in old characters for no reason?

Michael and Tyler waiting for a turbolift, Stamets told them both that in a previous timeline they danced .... they're super awkward

OH LORD

"What I'm feeling is complicated, and strange" "It's okay, I'm not going anywhere”

STOP TELLING US YOUR FEELINGS MICHAEL

I actually think they're really cute? I would usually like so many of these characters! but wow the plots are so. bad.

and it's so clumsy!

holy crap that was bad

oh lord, Saru in the next ep, they're on a planet, there are Klingons and the Admrial being tortured

wow. that's over. and took me ages to watch because I had to stop it so often lol

I have watched a lot of time travel episodes in my decades as a Trekkie (and on other sci fi shows) and that has got to be worst I’ve ever seen! It was SO confusingly done!

they just have no internal consistency!

you have Mudd getting revenge and Stamets working against him ... really really poorly ...

and all of their solutions to the problems just made no sense???

Stamets giving himself up to Mudd???

and then the final solution of them all working together ... it wasn't like in the Next Gen episode I keep thinking of, where they eventually realise they're looping and find the message in Data and it feels like they worked together to solve it

it feels like this show ... cuts corners

it wants to give us the exciting parts and the emotional pay off without actually doing any of the work, is the best way I can think to explain it

it was ... choppy and confused

that sums the show up to be honest.

they went on and on about how they’re telling a big serialised story, but it isn’t even? we’ve had these weird interlude episodes with Sarek and now Mudd where stuff just happens just because? and they keep TELLING us they’re fighting a war but it doesn’t feel like they’re in one!

if they’re going to do serialised season long arcs then they need to do way way better, like I just binge watched 9 episodes of Stranger Things yesterday! I know what a good serial narrative looks like and this is not it!

and if they’re going to do episodic then they need to do way way better

the plot of this was just confused nonsense that was weirdly focused around Michael and Tyler’s relationship more than anything else ... it just feels like they’re mashing a bunch of random rubbish together and hoping it works, rather than like a carefully crafted story on either an episodic OR a serial level!

and now I’m just thinking about how much I want to go watch some fun time loop episodes - like man, give me SG1 stuck in a time loop doing stupid shit any day, at least that was fun AND made sense

#hateblogging #STD #seriously so much hate for this episode #long post #extremely long

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rpsidebloghell · 7 years

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My last post got me thinking, have I ever introduced you all to my Novel’s characters? Bc I can’t even begin to explain to you how much I love them all so let me break down who they are. (Art isn’t 100% how I picture them but still awesome, commissioned the art like a year ago to help someone raising money for their dog bc of doggo health issues they couldn’t afford)

Elisabeth is the main pov character for the story and the one with the blue as red steaks in her hair. (not always there, done with hair chalk.) And she is a slightly over enthusiastic extrovert(when awake) who loves her dumbass dorky guardians like they were actually family. She also likes to goad Desmond into piggy back rides and usually fails and just jumps on Phoenix’s back and will give people the dirtiest look ever if people as if her and Desmond are dating because “no??? We grew up together??? He’s practically my brother and I’d sooner eat a live chicken????” Elisabeth is NOT the hero of this story, idk she’s just the one who stood out to me for pov bc she would be there for basically all of it bc of Aqua and Phoenis but like, plot is driven by the Elemental Advisors which btw is the name for the novel.

Desmond is Mr. I’m Gonna Wear A Ring Around My Neck Instead Of On My Finger BC I Can. He is literally the definition of an optimist, he prefers to believe that things will turn out fine until proven wrong and even then he’s someone who thinks every thing happens for a reason. He is just as disgusted as Elisabeth if anyone mistakes them as a couple but is better at hiding that then he and will usually just correct them and be like “no we’re just best friends!”. He legit has to drag his guardian out of caves sometimes when he gets into a depressed and brooding mood and once found him napping as a dragon and got Phoenix to do it instead bc “??? Dude I don’t wanna get stepped on and your more durable than me???” Draco has been a guardian to people in his family for generations upon generations, having met a young boy wanting the desert an spending 9 years helping him find his family before deciding he didn’t feel right leavin him behind. So he formed a guardian bond with him and has had one with 1 member of the family at any given time since, though there are sometimes gaps well e waits for a member to e born that he wants to form a connection with or as he tries to find someone in the family that he wants to make a guardian bond with and they with him.

Elisabeth as Desmond are both human beings from the planet earth(or mostly in Elizabetha case but???? That’s more plot centered than character which I’m nothing getting into RN)

Aquarius is the one with the blue hair and elf like ears, and honestly if it wasn’t for her neither one of her dork Elemental advisor partners would get anything done when together because Phoenix just finds it to fun to annoy Draco out of his quietness. She along with Drago and Phoenix are 3 of the 5 Elemental advisors to their king, and also spirits of the constellations of the same names. There is a whole big “Star Spirit Race” lore thing I could get into but YOLO not gonna RN. She is the physical embodiment of the star spirit of Aquarius(best way to explain without getting in depth is its roughly how gems physical form works in Steven Universe but also somewhat different??) and has powers over water and healing. She’s with Phoenix an exclusive though their commitment isn’t a permanent thing yet(which is rare with start spirits bc cause of how long they are around) and at one point when younger she and Draco had a brief relationship. She’s pretty close with the ‘elder’ advisors Perseus and Antila as well, she very much enjoys training with all of her fellow advisors in power combination and always enjoys getting their opinions on an idea that she had involving this. Free time tends to be spent letting herself drift and sink and float on any large body of water she can find.

Phoenix is the dude with the flamey hair and for the most part a giant dork who loves to annoy his best friend and future leader of the advisors Draco, who usually proceeds to try and lift himself away from the annoyance on a column of earth. He however can be a bit F a hot head at times, though it’s only ever once gotten out of control. When Draco’s wife and Polaris’(“King” of the star spirits) half human love child who they’d all come to see as a trusted friend turned evil and went crazy(legit not her fault, her human brain couldn’t cope with immortality) he lost control an Mt. Vesuvius erupted and he destroyed Pompeii and stayed their in isolation not talking to anyone or like 10 years till his mentor (Constellation Leo) got him to leave to help his depressed AF bff. He still feels terrible about what happened and will get broody whenever the city is mentioned. He Phoenix has always had a thing for Aquarius, however he never really said anything until somewhat recently by star standards-about 300 years ago. That’s a minor part in their history together though an they didn’t get together right away anyway so u won’t get in depth any more than I did in with Aqua’s blurb. His powers are pretty obviously fire related but??? He can morph into a Phoenix form as well.

DRACO, my god I had to save this broody little bitch last bc I’ll prob just keep babbling about him. Draco is my self created problematic fav. He is the next leader of the advisors as decided by Perseus, Antila and Polaris. (though TBH Aqua was a close second till se made it known she had no desire to actually lead when the debates about who would be the next leader were going on) He is also such a fucking broody little both these day, okay. Sorry back on track. Part of the reason for him being chosen as an advisor in the first place was his raw power, he has powers over both dirt and dirt like substances and plant life, can shift Ito a dragon and has naturally enhanced strength due to the dragon part of him. All this and he sill can’t stop his wife from going mad from immortality. OKAY OKAY SORRY BACK ON TRACK AGAIN.

Draco was trained in his ability a of Earth by Taurus and Plant life by Libra, later on by Perseus in leadership. He ended up close to ad old friend with Phoenix and Aqua before all the shit happened that made him a broody little bitch. When Phoenix volunteered for and left on an extended mission with Antila he and Aqua grew closer without Phoenix there, they had a brief relationship that had dwindled out naturally after a couple centuries-something not uncommon with their people. After Polaris’ daughter Vega was born the advisors were made her teachers an protectors, it wasn’t until she was nearly 30 the feelings shifted from that for Draco but there with the issue of lifespan and Vega not wanting to start somethings for the sole reason of not wanting to die on him. Eventually with the help of Aquarius and Pisces they found the solution of taking a small part of some stars energy force and replacing it with her own, though not enough for them to really notice. It worked and she was now basically immortal and they could live on happily every after for a thousand year before she went mad and he and she became committed to one and other after a couple centuries and they had matching sets of silver and gold bracelets to signify that except it didn’t last and she went crazy bc her brain wasn’t meant to handle that long of a life.

Because of her threat but neither Draco or Polaris wanting her to die she was sealed away(with help from the constellations Cepheus and Cassiopeia and guarded by Cetus lolololol couldn’t resist the Greek Myth reference bc I’m a dork) until they could find out how to fix the problem of her going mad and then Draco brooded in a cave for a few centuries before meeting Desmond’s ancestor and he wears Vega’s bracelets that he left behind when he refused o help her crazy self along with his own and basically just wonders why existence is so cruel and how to get Vega back to herself even if she still chooses not to be with him bc he’d rather a universe where she was truly herself and not driven mad but not with him than a universe where she is locked away for eternity as sill not with him. He just wants a universe where Vega is truly Vega and not some deranged version of herself driven mad by immortality.

EDIT: Legit 100% only because of her healing abilities that Aqua doesn't have scars like the boys even though she repeatedly tells them to come to her for healing when they are hurt and gives them a death glare when se realized thy have once again not done this each ad every time.

#Kayla's Ramblings #Elemental Advisors #KILL ME NOW I GOT SO OFF TEACK WITH DRACO'S BLURB IS NOT EEN A BLURB ANYMORE I MIGHT AS WELL HAVE WRITEN OUT TE WHOLE BACKSTORY I HAVE ON #HISCHARACTER SHEET IN MY CHARACTER PROFILE JOURNAL

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