#and theres this giel

[angelicmemo]

Why! Cant! I! Be! In! Love!

#or better question why does my stupid brain and even STUPIDER heart go oh ***** youre so sweet and lovely and talented and wonderful and i #want to be around you all the time and when i talk to you i cant stop smiling and when you hold my hand or wink at me from across the room #i feel so weak i could just collapse #oh ***** you sang song that so well i breifly forgot how to spell the word orange #I SAJD THAT #TO HIS FACE #HIS STUPID PRETTY FACE #and i try and see other people and i try and distract myseld and i try and like anyone but him and it kinda works! horray! im having a nice #time with a dude who is really cool and funny and is JUST as cute and smiley #and then he turns round and doesnt want me either #what the fuck #and the older guy the one everyone keeps telling me is a creep for liking me as if i cant make my own fuckinf decisions #DOESNT EVEN LIKE ME #hes talking about some girl and some concert and how he 'hasnt felt like this since his fuckjng wife' and im just there in the corner #trying desperately to be okay i dont even LIKE him like that i just want someone to love me #literally anyone please i feel so helpless #and theres this giel #girl #and shes cute and we like the same shows and she likes ME but shes only 18 and she reminds me so much of me i cant do it #what the fuck is wrong with me what exactly makes me so unloveable #AND!!!! i live with my ex and his girlfriend how wonderful! a constant reminder that i will never be chosen #im fucking bisexual AND polyamorous my dating pool is as big as humanly possible and still im here #personal

[cornerstorebitch]

no i cant explain what it is about schlocky teen dramas that infest my brain. but seasons 1-5 of degrassi are sincerely really solid tv especially for the demographic it was aimed at. i dont think a lot of people grasp how highly controversial both next gen and degrassi high were - degrassi has more gay characters and storylines than glee does. marco being gay was one of the first storylines they tackle in next gen. obviously the stds, rape, teen pregnancy, school shootings, and abortion storylines are more fraught but due to the psa nature of the show the sex stuff is pretty much expected. but degrassi was the first time in my life i saw a gay person on tv and the writers producers etc honestly deserve credit for airing a commercial with two guys kissing over and over on teen nick in 2009 or whatever

#part of it is that the les critical acxlaim a piexe of media gsfd fje more fjdy xan fer away wifh which is why theres SO many gay thsmed #episodes in sitcoms that cane out between 1975 and 1995 #i think wilipedia acfually has a list of tjemm #of them but like barneh miller? anybody? anybody? thay show has a gay episode #maude is another one. the nanny. golfen giels. pretty sure married with childrsn did one

[turing-tested]

THRAX/ODETTE THER. music video about a germ. hes not a guy hes just a fucking germ and theres like apparently more than five videos about this germ from OSMOSIS jones just like falling in love with a giel from the swan princesss. peopele just

[apeshit]

i don't know your tastes well, but as for music recommendations, how about "dancing" by katie dey? (sorry if this sent twice lol)

couldn’t listen all the way through | not my thing | it’s okay | kinda catchy | ok i really like this | downloading immediately | already in my library

i think the official video (with the dragon giel and fox girl) was rly nice and ill probably come back to watch it again and the lyrics and stuff reminds me of my younger self a lot, i like it but its not the kinda music i listen to much, i only ever listen to music off my youtube playlist and am so picky about it cause i want them all to invole the same feeling from me like i Loved mcr as a kid and theres many wham/george michael songs i enjoy but theres no mcr and very little wham on my music playlist anyway heres the music playlist i listen to btw https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLtRKQBFIdeH4tCtMFcVaHyKIxqHlor50b

[tsubomipsycho100]

i think u would like gon. i think ud like all of them tbh. u might like canary... killua and gon aka the besties... of all time... btw hisoka has like no intestines whatsoever his oitfit is insane he is a clown..... leorio is reigen but not as old.... kurapika is an icon mmm yes

OOOOOH canary is the pretty giel?? n gon is fatherless behavior n um um. OH killua is white haired nonbianry rep who is cis. um. theres suit dude and his weird blond girl boyfriend ? I rlly rlly wanna see that one catboy with the white hair who holds a decapitayed head. gay rights

[futanaritalizorah]

Please...let me sleep... *hugs shiba kiba inu tight* my body refuses this medicine...i just feel exhausted all the time as a result...ans tonight in particular i canr shut my brain off...just long enough to stop being sick... I pray harder...i told connor i used to pray to god...angry but...i founf myseld being more thankful...this was months ago...now i find myself just praying for forgiveness...praying for more...more for us...there has to be more...i prqy until i fall asleep...cause i dont want my mind to wander...i pray cquse i have to believe theres some purpose to it all... i pray Cause if you cant give closure...rhen god certainly will...im in his hands.... So i pray now...cause im scared...and lonely...and tired...and exhausted...and just wanting resf from being sick every other time....i pray xause all i have is shiba kiba inu. And i hope nemo still looks out for you as shiba kiba inu does for me on nivhts like these. Or mornings im a wreck and wont haul my ass out of bed. Im a mess This fever has me so emotional too so gr9 Ugh i just wanna know whag i did wrong When theres a liar right in your face. Theyre nor even rral. They xatfiahed a person...they told ypu i banned them feom ts when i didnt do sucg a thing....why am i still the one thats the liar t.T i pointed oit they mighr use uou and...so what...now im at fault? We all got played yet i feel like im mpre wrong for knowing it than the person eho was actually responsible...t.T Wpply that to wvery other sitition. I wasnt responsible for people leaving. Thwy left xause of their own accord t.T im tired of being blamed I wanna be blamed for beinf stupid for stayibf tgis lonf. I want jose eric ans savid to slap me causr i stayed when they told me i need to looj out for myself t.t i wanna slap myself xause i was nice and stupid and dis things out of love for you but...where was thay love foe me. Why didnt i love myself enough to know i deserve better. Self respect. Why. Connor. Ufh. Connor. I told connor i prayed kinder things now. He left me as well. He left me as well. But i dont vlame him. I wouldnt wanna see me in this rut either. Hugs shiba kiba inu hugs harder* :c i dojt vlame people for wanting to leave me Please god just let me sleep T.T my mind is tired tonight. Please never let him feel this way. Ever. Cauae its so crippling to live this way. I hate crawling our of bed in the afternoon T.T i hate aleeping angry. Confusrd. Sad. Lonely. Betrayed. Usrd. I haye not beinf comfortable in my own skin because every ounce of love was misconstdued and tuened against me. That kell hoe catfished and im still cwlled manipulativw. Fun fact: kell lied. Not me. Kell lied about his/her/ their life. So they lied avout whay thwy told uou. Aris has photos. Gold has experience. Val has screen shots. Kevin streamed it all. Theres picture qns video peoof. And you chose fqke eveeu time. Thats not on ME cwuse YOU chosr fqke. I cant bring myself to be around you cause im not gonna be confused as one of those fake friends. You treat those frienda you,have well. They...are a solid 100% bunch. I was fown and shit on myself and...each one...showed up...they sgowed up abd made sure i was ok. You have great friends. Dobt confuse a pretry fucking catfishing face as a friwnd Because i lost a friend too when i found about kell. She promisrd she woildnt hurt me. And look who cobtrivuted to mwking a mockery of my,life. Kell fucked me up in ways you wont understand. All you see is a pretrt xatfishibg giel thay rwjected ypu. Worse? She played with youe fwelings. But i could have told u thay. Elligator (that fucker you were fihting with in allies?) Also had a thibg going on with kell before ann. Surprise. Ik that cwuse kell played innocent but i didnt judge. Not until she stwrted making you into one of hee toys too. You idiot. I looked out for you. Kelsrara? U told the gm not to t2ll me cwus3 im crazy. And im your ex. You idiot. I knew long befoee becwuse kelsara kept harassinf me.i have ss of thay as well. In fact keyrus had to step in becaus3 kelsara just wouldnt stop harassibf me T.t you wnna se eharasment?? You fucking see the shit i had to deal with because od the lies *you* made and the mistakes *you* made. I had to deal with the afteemath abd i had to d3al with youe byllshit when u went aeound and told people slander aboht me. I knew! And i didnt *hate* you. What made me not stqnd yoy was your lies about me! Ask kell! I knew about kelsar! I knew! Ask aris! Yet i didnt fucking attack you qbout it when you cqme back to the gqme. I knew and i didnt bothee you qbout it T.T i deqlt with it. Like a fuckong human. I dealth with it So dont yoy fucking say you didnt hurt me. Cause you hqve no right to sqy you didnt hurt me. Cwuse thqts qll ive felt. Alll i wanted to hear was a solid stoey od what i did to you. Not one of them hqd stoei3s vexauae you hqve none. I loved you. With qll my heart. I cared too muchm that is called love So fuckinf decide if you want real or fake. Cquse i gave you real stories that are long lasting. Your lies will run out. You wre more thwn thia so stop lyinf. You left the pawn shop cquse you didnt like tueninf people away. You wanted to help. Stop calling me crazy and every othee shot when i speak the world of you despite qll this shit you keep pilinf on me. Knoe who made tge mistakes. I didnt fuckinf do shit with kell or kelsarq. Those were your mistakes. Not mine. In fact i told everyone rlse the sqme shit. I told them to ruck pff you xause you made mistqkes vut you dont deserve to be crucified. We qll deserve bettee *hugs shiba kiba inu* Im tired of sobbing qnd nobody hears a thinf. Fuxkinf do me a favor and log into swtor. Fuckinf app is too nuch of a pussu to tqlk to you avout liquidatinf. He wants to sell the fuild. If you dobt log in > he gets gm > he sells the guild O am i mqnipulativw again? No you fuck. Peoplr have disappointed me relebtlessly. I am the burxen of bad news. Why? Cause i fucking tqlk 5o them. I listen. That is how i know. So fucking get online and kick or whatever or discuss it witha pp. O hate hes doinf this when he could just discuss it. Ill hqte myself foe tellinf u thos cquse youll find a way to say i wqs reaponsible foe it. And ill hqte you for blaming me again. And then ill hqte myself cause i let you blame me agaib. I warned you cause youre a friebd...or...once a friend...idk...you said we werent driensa...you tell me Ik where i wanna stand. Im tired of feeling lost like an animal looking dor a home. I sound angey tellinf you this but underatand where im coming feom. My options are thin. You dobt teust me for God knows what reason. Here, lets say app doea get the guild and aella it...youre fonna blame me xquse i simply *knew* about it. But im hoping you know bettwe than to do that cause i pointed it out before it happened. I cqnt even comfortably talk to app abymore ever aince he admitted to wanting to liquidate shit. So i cant. I cqnt wqtch this unwind in front of me. I cqnr watch a supposed friend of yours liquidate the guild. And what? Youll come back homeless? I cqnt watch cause your "friend" is reaponsible for that Lets say i could have warned you. Could i have? Could i prwvwnt this feom hqppenibg? Or will you blow it in my face as me teykng to mqnipulatw people This was apps idea. Npt mine. Im simply relaying tge msg. I never hated you. So get your fucking eggs in a line. Cause im not th3 one fucking you,over. Kell, kels, and now...possibly app Thats what im deqlinf with even tho,youve been gone. I wish app wpuld just discuss it with you. He thinjs youre gone forever. Nah. I doubt it. Othwrwise that fuild would be gone officiaply. God just fix your shit before you blame me for it. I gried so hard. You kee0 nlaming me for wbeeythinv goinf weonf in your life. I only remember being ypue biggest supportwr next to your mom. What the fuck ever. I warned you...so please...dont hate me for knpwing...he might npt liquidate it if you come back to the game...itll give him a reason to play...but...sigh...im tired of beinf the bad person...i try to avoid peoppe from seeinf u thay way...uve just had toufh days...but...u uraeld paint me in that light... So ..self respect... whats wronf with me