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#and without effort before. and a little bit rn im having the space to remember that thats an active practice helloooo thats why its an activ
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how to be wary/alert without crossing over into fear? is the question
#a question. i guess. today i had enough energy to think about how to navigate spaces/places w/o getting dumbed down by fear#ok a certain kind of fear. like the ..disabling kind? idk. mayb this is a superficial boundary but how to keep the leash on a warranted '#'paranoia'. alertness that enables access to action and direct action and harm reduction stuff. not endless paranoia and guilt-feeding.#feel like u have to be in a very well-resourced space internally to idk have the stamina to keep up that kinda alertness/wariness#this has a lot to do with killing/unlearning the part of you that cringes at being 'out of step' or being surveilled or not wanting to step#on ppl's toes or disturb the negative peace or whatever. i feel like i could've explained this better when im not knee-deep in an episode bu#whatever lol what i am saying is im fearfullllllll im full of fear and its not the healthy kind lol it is paralyzing it keeps me from breath#ing and moving and etc etc#and also when am i gonna feel secure enough to sense that this shit is just straight up silly? and stupid? all the way through? that i find#it so disinteresting and un-arresting that i am deeply unimpressed n so able to achieve another sorta buoyancy? that lets me keep working or#being or doing the shit i want to do#cuz rn im so fatigued -- well its better i used to not be able to lift a finger without wanting to die -- that all this seems inaccessible o#or something . and ive been passing slowly thru the same old acknowledgement that maybe it isnt lol. it makes sense that this is a praxis a#way of life to orient towards rather than uhh uh the thing in my head that says that losing my grip on this means losing my grip forever and#its a permanent reflection of my worth/failure or whatever. its a one-time thing. end or be all. all or nothing. etc#lol. like relearning is a one-time bus stop. lol. sorry lol.#u know i was so angry and despairing at how i cant even rest now without guilt pervading all senses even tho i remembered i could easily#and without effort before. and a little bit rn im having the space to remember that thats an active practice helloooo thats why its an activ#practice it did not hit me immediately or at all as most things do rn but uh yeah its starting to look not-impossible. finally. i really had#to slog thru months to come to a point where this is possible again huh. exhausting#dont rb#soy talks shit
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innocent bones ch2
Summary: Apollo gets a wake-up call in a few ways. It’s okay, though--he’s got best-friend backup.
Link to AO3 in the notes.
“Goood morning, sunshine!”
“Blrgh,” Apollo says, more to his pillow than Clay. He rolls over and pulls the blankets over his head.
“Oh, are we grouchy this morning? I can drink both of these by myself if you wanna be left alone.”
Apollo peeks out from the covers warily. Clay dangles an iced drink in a plastic café cup tantalizingly over the bed. The morning is already hot, and only promises to get hotter; Apollo knows by the time he has proper clothes on, he’ll want something cold and sweet. He sighs and kicks the sheets aside, stretching.
“Why are you in my apartment?”
“Why were you sleeping with one sock on?”
Apollo looks down. Sure enough, he still has on the sock he’d yanked on at three in the morning. “...Fuck me.”
“Well, since you asked so nicely,” Clay says, batting his eyelashes, then cackles as Apollo swings a pillow at him and chases him around the room. When they reach the kitchenette, Clay successfully diverts his attention to a small paper bag of baked goods. Apollo allows him to exchange the pillow for a chocolate croissant. “To answer your question, I’m here to chill with my best friend on my day off, like we’ve been planning for, oh, the last three weeks?”
Shit. That’s right. Apollo scrubs the crust of sleep from his eyes, shoulders slumping. “Sorry. I remember now.”
Clay smiles easily and slides him the drink. Apollo sips. Peachy oolong tea with lemonade. “No harm, no foul. Seriously, though. Why the sock?”
“I had the most surreal fucking night,” Apollo says, and tells him about it. Clay starts laughing uproariously as soon as he mentions the teeth. He doesn’t stop until Apollo concludes with Prosecutor Debeste’s intervention.
“Oh, man,” Clay chuckles, wiping at the corners of his eyes. “How does this shit happen to you?”
“If I knew, don’t you think I would try to stop it?”
“I don’t know, would you?” Clay smirks maddeningly and bites into his muffin. Through a mouthful of crumbs, he drawls, “I’m sure you suffered so much with a handsome man vying for your attention.”
“Don’t talk with your mouth full, you disgusting goblin.”
“Ach, Herr Forehead,” Clay says, in the worst fake German accent Apollo has ever heard. “When I’m sad and lonely, you’re the first one I think of to cheer me up. Oh, how I wish you were here with me—“
Apollo seizes the pillow again. Clay rushes to get a grip on it before he can take a swing. They struggle for control until they both tip out of their chairs and go crashing to the hard, unforgiving linoleum floor in a heap.
“Ow,” Clay says. “Huh. I’ve had more exciting tumbles.”
“And Mr. Starbuck trusts you to pilot a rocket with him,” Apollo scoffs, feeling a bit ow himself.
“Please, I’m much nicer to Mr. Starbuck than I am to you, I don’t have to worry about fighting with him.”
They attempt to sit up. Clay somehow maneuvers their tangled limbs apart without injury to either of them. Apollo moves to stand, but Clay slings his legs across Apollo’s own before he can go anywhere.
“Hey,” Clay says, low and serious. “For real. You okay? You didn’t have any new nightmares because of all that, did you?”
Apollo winces. “...No.”
“What was that face for?”
“Nothing.”
“You’re an awful liar and you know it.” Clay frowns, concern creasing his brow. “You can tell me anything. You know that, right? You don’t have to, if you don’t want to. But I’m here for you, dude.”
“I know, space cadet. Calm down.”
“Alright, alright.”
Clay moves his legs out of the way. It’s Apollo’s turn to interrupt him before he can rise by dropping his head onto Clay’s shoulder.
“Worse than a nightmare,” he mutters.
“What? What’s worse than a nightma—oh, my God,” Clay gasps. “You had a sex dream?!”
“WH—NO!”
“MY BABY BOY IS GROWING UP!”
“I DID NOT HAVE A SEX DREAM!”
Apollo tries to smack him. Clay catches his hand and wrestles him into a headlock.
“The most important thing to remember is that this is a normal part of puberty,” Clay says, solemnly, even as Apollo shrieks with dismay. “Every growing boy—“
“I WILL KICK YOUR ASS.”
“Like you could? Alright, sunshine, let’s hear it. What’s worse than a nightmare, aside from a sex dream?”
“I don’t want to tell you anymore,” Apollo says, sulkily, voice muffled by Clay’s arm.
“Come on, don’t be like that.” Clay pats his head with his free hand. Apollo grumbles some more. “Is it really that embarrassing?”
“Yes.”
“Oh, then it’s about feelings.”
“Wh—how did you—I mean, what makes you think that?!” Real smooth, Justice. Apollo can feel the hot flush of mortification on his face.
“Honestly, dumbass, how long have we been friends? You think I don’t know how your brain works as well as you know mine?”
“That doesn’t mean I have to like it.”
“Yeah, you’re busy saving all your affection for Klav—ow! Don’t hit me!”
“Shut up! God.”
“You know you get to have a crush, right? That’s normal and okay.”
“I don’t want to have a crush,” Apollo moans, hopelessly. Clay finally releases him from the headlock so he takes the opportunity to bury his face in his hands. He hates catching feelings. He always blows it somehow. It doesn’t help that they never have these conversations anywhere less weird than the kitchen floor. “He’s my colleague. I need to be professional. Our working relationship is too important for me to fuck this up.”
“He got lonely while he was high on painkillers and called you at three AM and you’re still going on about professionalism?”
“It sounds stupid when you say it like that.”
“That’s because it is stupid.”
“Your face is stupid.”
“I’m serious, man. Like, if you wanted concrete evidence that he considers you a friend outside of your working relationship, it just got handed to you on a silver platter. There’s no way you’re the first friend he’s ever had that’s been a little into him.”
“...I guess that’s true.”
“Who knows? Maybe he’s a little into you too.”
Apollo gives him an incredulous look.
“It wouldn’t be the weirdest thing to happen to you in the last year, that’s all I’m saying! And he has an awful lot of nice things to say about you for a courtroom rival.”
“We’re not rivals,” Apollo says, mostly on automatic. Clay ruffles his hair as they clamber to their feet.
“Sure, sure. Hey, speaking of things he has to say, has he said anything to you this morning?”
“How should I know? Somebody bullied me out of bed and I left my phone behind.”
“I’ll go get it, you eat breakfast.”
Apollo finishes his croissant. After a moment, Clay tosses his phone at him.
“Do I really have to check it right now?”
“If you’re gonna be such a big baby about it, I can check it for you.”
“Ugh. No, fine, I’ll look.”
Klavier Gavin, 9:04am
hey, i just wanted to apologize for last night. i hope i didn’t scare you too badly. i remember you saying i owed you one, so let me know if you come up with a way i can apologize.
Apollo lets out the breath he hadn’t realized he was holding. Clay makes a questioning sound and a grabby hand gesture. Apollo passes his phone over, obligingly, and steals a chunk of Clay’s muffin while he reads it for himself.
“Totally normal,” Clay says. “See? It’s fine. You’re fine.”
“I’m fine,” Apollo echoes. He takes his phone back and sips absentmindedly at his iced tea as he types.
Apollo Justice, 10:38am
I’m going to change your contact name to “Teeth Theft Victim.”
How’s your mouth this morning?
Klavier Gavin, 10:39am
HF no :(
not the worst. definitely not as bad as it was last night!
i had some painkillers when i got up. mostly just feels a little weird rn
Apollo Justice, 10:41am
That sounds about right.
Klavier Gavin, 10:42am
did you get back to sleep okay?
Apollo Justice, 10:43am
Yeah, I’m fine.
Klavier Gavin, 10:43am
you’re always fine, HF ;P
Apollo Justice, 10:44am
I bet you think you’re clever.
I got plenty of sleep. Don’t worry.
Klavier Gavin, 10:45am
i am sincerely sorry though. seriously, let me know if i can make it up to you somehow
“Do I actually seem angry?” Apollo asks Clay, mystified. Clay peers over his shoulder at the message thread. “He didn’t really do anything wrong, considering his mental state at the time. I’m not trying to be brusque with him.”
“Tell him to take you out for coffee,” Clay says.
“What? Why? Where did that come from?”
Apollo Justice, 10:47am
All you have to do is not call me at 3AM saying ominous things without context again.
I know this is a terribly high bar to meet, but I have faith that you’ll rise to the occasion.
Klavier Gavin, 10:48am
you really thought i was actively dying, didn’t you?
were you actually on your way out the door?
Apollo Justice, 10:49am
I thought you had gotten roofied. Of course I was on my way out the door.
Klavier Gavin, 10:50am
my knight in shining armor ;)
“TELL HIM TO TAKE YOU OUT FOR COFFEE,” Clay yells, aggressively shaking Apollo by the shoulder. Apollo yelps and almost drops his phone.
“He’s always like this! It doesn’t mean anything!”
“I WILL DO IT MYSELF.”
“Do what yourself?! Take him out for coffee?! Fine! I hope you’re very happy together!”
“God, and you mean it, too. You’re hopeless, AJ. No game at all. Give me your phone.”
“NO!”
Apollo Justice, 10:52am
awerrttrtrtFSDFFG
Klavier Gavin, 10:52am
?? HF??
Apollo Justice, 10:53am
BRB
Have tio kickmny friendsd ass
Apollo does not kick Clay’s ass, because Clay has fifty pounds of muscle on him and Apollo hasn’t gotten in a real fight since he was a middle schooler, but he damn well tries. It’s the effort that counts. Maybe. Hopefully.
Apollo Justice, 11:12am
COFFREERE
Klavier Gavin, 11:14am
??????
Apollo Justice, 11:15am
TAKE HIM OUT TO COFFEE
Klavier Gavin, 11:16am
who am i speaking to??
Apollo Justice, 11:17am
DONT QWORRT ABT UT
Klavier Gavin, 11:18am
i’m a little worried about it
is Herr Justice okay??
Apollo Justice, 11:18am
YEA HES FINE
IM BULLYING HIMN
Klavier Gavin, 11:20am
that doesn’t sound very fine
Apollo Justice, 11:21am
I am so fucking sorry.
Klavier Gavin, 11:21am
are you alright?
Apollo Justice, 11:23am
I’m fine.
I’m with a friend right now and he decided to be obnoxious.
Klavier Gavin, 11:24am
by which i suppose you
mean he stole your phone
Klavier Gavin, 11:25am
That and putting me in a headlock.
Klavier Gavin, 11:25am
:(
Apollo Justice, 11:26am
I’m fine, honestly. We roughhouse all the time.
It’s mostly my pride that hurts.
“Bet you ten bucks he offers to kiss it better,” Clay says, slurping obnoxiously at the dregs of his iced tea. As winner’s spoils, he has retained eavesdropping privileges. Textdropping? Wiretapping? Fuck it, Apollo doesn’t know.
“He will not,” Apollo says, through gritted teeth, valiantly attempting to suppress the red-hot surge of embarrassment to his cheeks.
Klavier Gavin, 11:28am
well then, we all know you’ll survive that one :P
Apollo Justice, 11:30am
Ouch. Rub more salt in the wound, why don’t you?
“You owe me ten bucks,” Apollo announces.
“You motherfucker, you didn’t even take the bet!”
“It was implied! You would have made me give you ten dollars.”
Clay grudgingly pulls out his wallet and gives Apollo a five, three ones, and a fistful of change. He hands it over way too fast to have figured out how much the change is worth, but then Clay is actually good at numbers shit, so maybe he did. Anyway, Apollo cares more about the principle of the exchange than receiving exactly ten dollars.
Klavier Gavin, 11:31am
i prefer to think of it as a salve to help you heal faster
Apollo Justice, 11:32am
By making fun of me?
Klavier Gavin, 11:33am
by reminding u that u can pull through these hard times!
Apollo Justice, 11:34am
Sure.
Klavier Gavin, 11:35am
but hey, for real. do you want to go out for coffee sometime?
“YES,” Clay hollers, victoriously. Apollo wants to curl up under the table and die of mortification.
“I can’t believe you. He thinks he has to do this because I got inconvenienced last night. This is stupid, Clay, why would you do this to us?”
“Because,” Clay says, “He flirts with you, constantly, and you’re who he calls at three AM when he’s in pain and he wants to talk to someone to distract him, and you have a crush that can be seen from space. It’s my job as your best friend.”
“It’s really not.”
“Uh-huh. Tell the nice man you’ll go out for coffee with him.”
Apollo Justice, 11:39am
You really don’t have to take me out just because of what happened last night.
Clay was being absurd.
Klavier Gavin, 11:41am
okay, sure, i understand
but do you WANT to?
Apollo Justice, 11:42am
I mean. Yeah.
If you’re sure.
Klavier Gavin, 11:43am
i’m positive :)
Apollo Justice, 11:44am
Then coffee would be cool.
“Cool,” Clay echoes. “God, AJ, you’re a mess. I love you so much. Cool, he says, when the actual rockstar asks him out on a date.”
“You bullied the rockstar into asking me on a date,” Apollo snaps, red-faced.
“I didn’t do a damn thing to him except offer a suggestion. He didn’t get put in a headlock.”
Klavier Gavin, 11:45am
Großartig! i have a meeting tomorrow afternoon, but perhaps tuesday?
Apollo Justice, 11:46am
Tuesday is fine.
What time? Where are we going?
Klavier Gavin, 11:48am
let’s say 3pm? and it’s a surprise ;)
Apollo Justice, 11:49am
I won’t be footing the bill if you drag me out to some weird, fancy upscale tea bar.
Klavier Gavin, 11:50am
nein, don’t be ridiculous. it’s my treat
“Ooh, what a gentleman!”
“Can’t you stop reading over my shoulder and let me set this up in peace now?!”
“No, I just scored you a date and you elbowed me very hard in the stomach earlier. I earned this.”
Apollo Justice, 11:52am
Does that mean it IS a weird, fancy upscale tea bar?
Klavier Gavin, 11:53am
actually it means i haven’t decided yet
Apollo Justice, 11:54am
Ah. Foolish me, then.
How am I supposed to get there if it’s a surprise?
Klavier Gavin, 11:55am
oh, you can just meet me at my office and i’ll drive us there
...unless you’re still afraid of my motorcycle? :P
Apollo Justice, 11:58am
I’m not afraid.
But you better have a second helmet.
Klavier Gavin, 12:00pm
don’t i always, Schatz?
“You go on his motorcycle?” Clay says, outraged and oblivious while Apollo can feel himself going scarlet from the roots of his hair all the way down to his collar. “This is so unfair. You’ll barely get in a car with me, and you’re terrified of motorcycles. How long did it take you to realize you like this guy again?”
Through gritted teeth, Apollo says, “You drive like you’re trying to die young, and Klavier is the only person I know who consistently follows every single traffic law to the letter.”
“Sounds like—“
“Also, we work together, and basically every time I’ve gotten a ride from him has been to or from case-relevant locations.”
“—Like excuses to me. What does Schatz mean, anyway?”
“I don’t know,” Apollo lies. Clay’s eyebrows shoot up to his hairline. He’s not that oblivious, then.
“Uh-huh.”
Apollo Justice, 12:04pm
I guess so.
Klavier Gavin, 12:05pm
so tuesday at 3pm, meeting at my office, then?
Apollo Justice, 12:06pm
Works for me.
I have to go, I’m supposed to be hanging out with Clay today. But I’ll see you Tuesday?
Klavier Gavin, 12:09pm
tuesday it is! i can’t wait to see you ;)
and tell your friend i said danke, ja?
Apollo Justice, 12:11pm
Thanks, he wasn’t already being insufferable enough.
“Oh I’m the fucking best,” Clay says, gleefully. Apollo tries to hide a smile, but it’s pointless. Clay has already thrown an arm around his shoulders to squeeze him in a tight side-hug. “Who is the best friend in the whole wide world who probably just got you laid?”
“Clay.”
“Remember this when I’m done with my mission and I have time to date again, okay? I expect equally enthusiastic wing-manning from you.”
“You have literally never needed me to wingman for you,” Apollo says, with fond exasperation. “Besides, what happened to that alien boyfriend you keep insisting you’ll come back with?”
“Well, maybe he’ll only be my alien work-friend when I come back, and I’ll need my dear friend to help me push past my misconceptions about professionalism to find true love.”
“Good grief,” Apollo says, as the blush that had been steadily dying down on his face flares back to life. “True love? It’s one coffee date. Slow it on down.”
Clay opens his mouth, probably with the intent to say more wild shit about Apollo’s upcoming date (a date! With Klavier! Is Apollo still in a weird exhaustion-induced feelings dream?), so Apollo hurriedly jumps in to say, “So how did you want to spend your day off? Video games? Movies?”
“I want to kick your ass at Smash Bros,” Clay says.
“I think we can arrange that.”
“Almost as easily as we just arranged—“
“Pushing your luck, Terran.”
“I learned that from the very best,” Clay says, nudging Apollo’s shoulder with his own with a fond grin. Apollo can’t help but smile back.
“I guess you did.”
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faunusrights · 4 years
Text
OFFAL HUNT REMASTERED LIVEBLOG // CHAPTER 22
IN THIS EPISODE OF SURPRISINGLY TENDER TENDERNESS:
It had her soul by a hook, a barbed arrow digging into her flesh, gouging her bloody the more she tried to escape it.
JUST KIDDING
okay i’m just gonna HOP RIGHT IN if u dont mind me cause we in it now and i DON’T have time to catch you all up go read the fic!!!!!!!!!!!! DONT ASK ME SHIT
A direct line suited her better. From up here, with only the rain between her and the sky, the path ahead was so clear. The tether was a straight line.
a gaydar so refined it comes with its own overlay. sweet.
the planet below her resisted, no matter how she insisted
even when she persisted? 
She pushed, and the force released like a broken dam, propelling her body away from the unyielding world beneath it—she leapt, high into the air, and it was like flying. With huge bursts of Aura, she cushioned her falls and leapt again, from rooftop to rooftop, making a straight line across the city.
can u imagine yr in umbraroot having a grand old time minding yr own business and then u see Very Famous Tenured Professor of Beacon Academy, Glynda Goodwitch, pinging herself across the sky? nobody would believe u. do u think it’d b on the news.
The rain fell hard. It was pitch dark. Glynda had the phantom of a scent: like the last breath of a campfire before it died, like a kinder version of the acrid stench of Grimm, Cinder’s trail was clear as day to her. She was getting close; she could sense it, like blood on the wind.
ISNT THIS NOSTALGIC,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, wow. its like glynda’s abt to ruin vale’s infrastructure all over again,
If Cinder was in a fight, this rain would muzzle her. Glynda remembered it vividly: how frustration tainted Cinder’s face in Forever Fall, how her fire sputtered and died. Even Cinder would lose her edge here, in this cold downpour. If she was in trouble—if she—
remember when glynda realised this for the first time and was like ‘hoho’ only now its made a thousand times worse because u have a crush emotions r hell and yr in the soup now!!!!!!!!!!! YR IN THE SOUP NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
She almost ran right past Cinder—might have missed her entirely, if not for the painful yank at her own soul.
did cinder just hit the ground like a wet grape
“Don’t touch me!” Cinder’s voice was raw. She snarled the words out like a cornered animal and lashed out with one arm, hitting Glynda’s hand away. The other arm was limp, still tucked to her chest.
BE GENTLE WITH KITTY,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, lure her ass out w/ some shrimp on a string,
She shook like a frightened fawn under Glynda’s touch, ratchet tense and wholly spent of strength.
i cannot even describe how many of these scenes i am seeing so vividly in my head and my GOD do i wish i were better at sequential art cause i want to draw them ALL........................ I WANNA DRAW OUT THIS WHOLE THING!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAA
god i cant like. TALK ABT THIS SCENE WITHOUT COPY-PASTING THE ENTIRE THING BUT AAAAAAAAAA god. GOD. i just. phew. PHEW. its REAL TENDER. GLYNDA PICKING CINDER UP LIKE A LIL GRAPE AND wait diesel is this the thing you drew art of. diesel. diesel look at me is this that art--
Her fingers bunched in Glynda’s shirt. They were drenched and cold and Glynda hurt so much inside for her—whatever had happened to Cinder this night had destroyed her, that much was clear.
/sips drink see if i were an asshole id say hoohoo the karma but as i am not i say only this: babey 😔
If they recognized her name, they were determined to act normally when arranging the room she asked for.
“hey didn’t we just see her ping across the city a couple of hours ago--” “greg don’t even ask”
“I don’t want to talk about it,” Cinder mumbled. “Leave me.”
“I won’t.”
ough,,,, directly in the kokoro i see
The shower was a collaborative effort; Glynda inspected for injuries while Cinder sat in the tub, warm water pelting down on them both.
other slowburns when they share a shower: hoohoo,,,,,,,, the tension,,,,,,,,, the s k i n offal hunt: what if you got in the shower with yr ex-enemy,,,,,,,,,, to inspect her wounds,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, and you were both girls 😳
Glynda gently roused her own, pressing a tender flow of it through her palms, offering it to Cinder.
Cinder’s Aura was hollow and hungry. Her soul lapped up everything it was offered. Cinder leaned back slightly, like that would help the boost go through faster; or maybe like all she wanted was a kind touch. She didn’t look back. Slowly, the various cuts and scrapes that littered her body erased themselves.
i am loving this mirroring which you probably already guessed but im like wriggling in my chair abt it all,,,,,,,,,,,,,, THIS GAY SHIT. FUCK YEA. FUCK YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEA
She turned off the shower and stepped out, gathering up the biggest towels she had found, bundling Cinder up in one and fluffing her hair again. This time the white towel came away clean. Cinder peered out owlishly, her face a far healthier color despite the purple bruising that remained around her eyes, telling plainly of her weariness.
OKAY straight up that description is so cute i physically clapped a hand to my mouth and went ‘AWUGH’ because BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! B A B Y
There was a gulf between them in the hotel bed.
It wasn’t at all like their nights at Cinder’s house. This was closed off. Distant. A thousand questions and answers hung unspoken in the air, heavy like the rain clouds themselves. The two of them were warm and dry, but not much else. There was little comfort to speak of.
see the real slowburn experience is having progress and losing that shit again. we take one step forwards and two back. u get the HIGH and then u get the real low but rn i hope cinders round face smiles once again. nobody who looks that baby like should ever b so sad and thats a fact 😔
Cinder, in her sleep, started crying again. It came and went in disconnected pieces, until she finally cried herself awake, startling out of her dreams.
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i sent this crying cat in response to the update announcement but i never knew how real it was until now
again there’s a whole ass section where i cant pick one bit cause its ALL good but GOD this fucking. whole silent conversation theyre having. OUGH. THE SOULMATES.
When Cinder didn’t answer the question, Glynda held one arm out, lifting the blankets between them. “Cinder.”
Glynda didn’t know which surprised her more: that she had offered, or that Cinder accepted.
OH???????????
She settled quietly, face pressed into Glynda’s collarbone, her breath flitting warm over scar-marked skin. Glynda’s arm, curled around her back, weighed her down. Cinder did not hold on to her in return. She was folded up around herself, fitting into the space Glynda had made for her, taking to warmth and shelter like an abandoned child.
OH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ;w; 
also whuh-oh:
The fear was eating her alive, and bit by bit, her skin seemed to unravel, every layer of her body sloughing off into just meat, rent through by that light—it felt like teeth, like destruction, like being twisted apart in some giant’s hands like an insect having its wings pulled out. It held fury like she had never felt. She quailed before it, and it bared its teeth, black tar and grave-rot spilling from between yellowed fangs.
Glynda tried to close her eyes, to look away, to run away, but it seized her like a bear trap sinking its jagged teeth into the wrong prey, snapping a much more fragile deer bone with ease. It sieved her being out from between her ribs, drinking only the cacophony of her soul, lapping up every part of her inheritance—all the while she was fighting, struggling helplessly in its grasp, her mind mere shatterings of bright-red pain, with only slivers of meat and fragments of bone remaining of her body—torn apart by lances of sunlight, burning like fire, a dawn that came with the sound of a scream.
firstly: 👈😎👈
secondly: do i gotta say how i love how visceral this fic is? i say it like in every liveblog. BUT IM SAYING IT AGAIN FOR GOOD MEASURE. IM SAYING IT AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It was coming. It would destroy her. With ease, with relish, it would tear her still beating heart from her chest and discard it, offal from the slaughter—and then it would dig deeper still, to draw out of her that very engine that kept her moving.
is this the closest we’ve gotten to an almost title namedrop?
Glynda stared through the darkness, seeing nothing, but knowing without a doubt that her gaze pointed north like a compass.
HRM............................................. I N 👈 T E R 😎 E S T I 👈 N G
THATS CHAPTER 22 BABEY. it was VERY good. i mean rip cinder’s whole ass but i do love her. i love this evil baby. i also love glynda picking her up with all the effort of picking up a bag of crisps,
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