#b99 is always a life saver

[terresdebrume]

bruh, idk how to tell you this but the untamed is not the "queer asian rep" you are looking for. yes, it's an adaptation from a danmei novel (which in my opinion, are as bad as yaoi manga in fetishize gay men) but since the chinese goverment banned all portrayal of queer relationship in tv, all the danmei adaptations are pretty much just queer baiting

So, there is quite probably a conversation to be had about the merit of danmei novels in terms of rep, but since the only thing I know about them is your opinion I’m not the person to have it. I will say, though, that on a personal level although I’m aware that yaoi has plenty of issues, I’m still grateful it exists as they were the only kind of queer or queer adjacent content I could get my hands on as a repressed queer teen. Sometimes, what looks like fetishizing from the outside (or, hell, is actually made for fetishism purposes) is a gateway to better work for readers, or authors, or both, so as flawed as the genre is (and believe me, I realize it is very flawed) it’s not entirely without merit.

However, I strongly disagree with you about calling danmei adaptations queer baiting.

Queer baiting happens when creators put hints they have no intention or desire to follow through. What’s going on with The Untamed (and I suppose with other drama) is censorship aka an external force preventing the people working on those adaptations from being more explicit about the story they’re telling. It is a completely different ballpark and I think it’s extremely important to recognize it. Representation forced to hide in the margin may not be what everyone needs, but it’s still representation, and just because I (and, from your message, I think maybe you too) have the privilege to be able to demand more explicitly queer stories nowadays doesn’t mean everyone else does.

Queer subtext is and has always been a way for queer people from everywhere to find each other when it wasn’t safe to do so openly. It is and has always been a life saver for many, many of us throughout the ages and the world, and you know what? If this show is being broadcasted in China, there is no doubt in my mind that there are Chinese queer people out there seeing it and feeling less alone for it, less like broken monsters because they can see themselves and their own repression in these characters. No doubt, whatsoever.

Look, Nonners, I’m sure you mean well and I’m sorry this is turning into a rant, but I currently live in a country where just saying the word “gay” plunges a room into silence. That’s where it’s at in Cambodia these days, because even though the government has taken no particular measure against the depiction of queer people, the cultural censorship is just that strong. Explicit queer stories could not be made here, not in any kind of mainstream circuit, just as something happier than Brokeback Mountain could not have been made at the time that movie came out. Do you think that means queer khmer people don’t deserve something for themselves? Do you think that means if a khmer moviemaker tried to get queer characters into their movies under the radar, it wouldn’t count as representation?

I don’t.

Western standards (and particularly the US standards upheld as universal on tumblr) are not applicable everywhere. They are not feasible everywhere. I’m not expecting The Untamed to give me B99 or The Old Guard levels of representation, but just because it doesn’t look like what I’d like (or even, yes, leaves me wishing for more sometimes) doesn’t make it not rep.

TLDR; Everything I’ve seen so far about this show points towards the crew being aware that they’re filming a love story and just can’t afford to push the boundaries more than they already are. That’s censorship, not queerbaiting, and unless this assessment gets proven wrong, I’m not blaming what seems to be a crew of passionate people for the bigotry of their government.

#The Untamed #Queer Stuff #YOU CANNOT HOLD CHINESE QUEER MEDIA TO THE US STANDARDS OF QUEER MEDIA #It's not how it works #the US is not the be all end all of queer rep #hell even inside there I'm sure plenty of queer peeps feel left out #I beg of you please learn the difference between censorship and queerbaiting #p l e a s e #Nonners #Assbox Adventures

[obsessedx]

I was tagged by @admiralheywood 💖 thank you flowerrr 🌺🌺 ily

List which 5 TV shows make you feel better then tag 10 other blogs

1. The Simpsons - when I get depressive periods, it’s honesly a life saver, it will always have a place in my heart

2. New Girl - I watched it when it premiered in 2011 and I fell in love, Nick x Jess are one of me top 5 otps

3. Sherlock BBC - nothing tops Sherlock x Watson chemistry + mysteriesss

4. W Two Worlds - first KDrama I’ve ever watched if I need a lift up, there’s always a happy ending waiting for me there

5. Buzzfeed Unsolved - same as Sherlock, awesome true crime/ ghost stories and amazing chemistry between The Ghoul Boys - Shane Madej & Ryan Bergara

Special shoutout to: The Good Place, The X-Files, BBC Pride and Prejudice, BBC Emma, Julie & The Phantoms, Worth It, The Office & B99

I tag: @eddiesdiaz, @viviansternwood, @winifredssanderson, @stevn-rgers, @belvsck, @stolenxkissess, @malydia-tate, @captainsantiagos, @swainlake, @miller-day  ✨ ✨

#tag game #thankkssss beth #the simpsons #new girl #buzzfeed unsolved #w two worlds #sherlock bbc

[betratyal]

                       the first clear thought in years:                              I REFUSE TO DIE.

JACOB BATALON? No, that’s actually PETER PETTIGREW from the MARAUDERS ERA. You know, the child of AMBROSIA PETTIGREW and ALISTER MCALISTER? Only 20 years old, this GRYFFINDOR alumni works as a DISH WASHER and is sided with HIMSELF. HE/THEY identifies as AGENDER and is a HALFBLOOD who is known to be CUNNING, HUMOROUS and ALLOCENTRIC but also OBSESSIVE, PASSIVE and COWARDLY. 

LINKS – pinboard, stats, app. CHARACTER PARALLELS – winston bishop ( new girl ), sid jenkins ( skins ), charles boyle ( b99 ), edmund pevensie ( narnia ), eric forman ( that 70s show ), bunny corcoran ( the secret history ) AESTHETIC –  ketchup stains on band shirts, an incomprehensible minute long string of curses, tracing the veins in your wrist, the smell of breakfast and fresh coffee, card tricks at three in the morning, freddie mercury impersonations, lying on the floor of the kitchen staring a the ceiling for three hours, trembling hands holding a joint, a guilty grin. HEADS UP – this intro contains mentions of bullying, death, mental illness (eating disorders (bed & bulimia) and depression and anxiety), self destructive tendencies and weed. ive trigger warned each bullet point where it comes up.

history ( 1960 - 1978 )

peter was born to ambrosia pettigrew, a halfblooded scottish-filipino witch. his father -- a muggle -- was not in the picture and hadn’t been ever since he’d learned of ambrosia’s pregnancy; he would sent her money every now and then, in the first years of peter’s life, but was never in the picture. ( and that was for the best, thought ambrosia; she didn’t love him, and he was a muggle, but still --- she was heartbroken and wished that she could give more to her son ).

peter grew up living with his mother in a small flat in glasgow. his grandparents lived nearby, and he spent a lot of time with them. peter learned how to be alone from a young age, with his mother working a lot and he himself lacking friends and peers to waste the days with --- as a child, he delved into fictional worlds ( superhero comics, roald dahl novels, animated tv shows ) and found friends there.

bullying tw / went to muggle elementary as well, but never felt at home there. he was the odd one out: his clothes didn’t fit well, his nervous habits were annoying to his classmates, his words were too clumsy and his eyes too shifty. he didn’t mind not having friends ( or so he thought, until he did have them ) but he did mind being picked on and teased. end of tw

death tw /  his grandmother died when he was seven and it was devastating; peter’s family was so small and compact, his social world so limited, that it had a huge impact. his relationship with his grandfather did grow much stronger through it. end of tw 

and then peter finally went to hogwarts! and peter made friends for the FIRST TIME. and he found a second home! ah, my god --- peter was so happy, he was really so hyped and in awe of his life and his friends. it all felt a bit surreal; especially because he looked up to james and sirius and remus so much --- james, mainly, but all of them were so amazing, and he was so amazed that they liked him, too.

peter always loved heroes. he loves comic books and people who save the day and get the girl and do it all. i think he kind of … projected that onto james and sirius especially? did not know how to do this friendship thing as an 11 year old tbh, was a mess, was blinded by their amazingness damn, and thus kind of hero worshipped them, didn’t see their flaws and faults.

re: peter being a gryffindor; peter admires heroism and bravery and chivalry, and it’s your values that get you sorted some place. and he always did try to be brave, and he WAS in a lot of moments, because he became a damn animagus for his bud! i mean! he was not a hatstall btw  — i choose to ignore that stupid bit of post canon. it took a while for the hat, sure, but no more than two minutes.  

peter was a pretty bad student, to be honest. not because he was stupid, but because he’s just not build for school. deadlines? exams? homework? no thank you --- those were both sources of stress and horribly tedious things and peter was much too occupied with shenanigans and having fun. peter learned better in different settings: he got very good at certain charms because they allowed him to be lazy ( hello, accio! ) and was able to put his mind to becoming an animagus because there was a necessity and a proper motivation, and became better at potions because of all the hangover potions he brew. 

becoming an animagus for remus was ! important ! to peter ! he did it for remus, not because of peer pressure, or anything else — he did it because it was right, and his friend deserved it and ! he did it, too, because he could. sure, his transfig grades may have been more than poor, but the kid did have some skill. he just needed motivation, which mcgonagall didn’t give (bc. she scared him.) and this situation? motivated the hell out of him.

peter would be lying if he said he wasn’t taken a bit aback when he learned about remus’ lycanthropy — not because he was scared of him, to be honest, but he was just ? shocked ? he was more scared for remus, and so sad? so fucking sad for him? : ( he cried

he also loved spending his time at hogwarts playing games; from muggle card games to chess to gobstones. collected chocolate frogs Very Seriously as well, and still does tbh.

weed & anxiety tw / peter started smoking pot in the summer between his fourth and fifth year, and never really stopped. it made him slack more at school, but also eased his anxiety, which had started to develop in his fourth year. as months passed, peter became more and more of a stoner, which made him both more relaxed and funnier, but also … a whole of a lot lazier. end of weed tw

peter had always been a bit … fidgety, easily on edge, a bit nervous, but he’d never really known anxiety until around fourteen years old. his insecurities grew, as he started comparing himself more to his friends and finding nothing but things he lacked in comparison to them, and questions as to why they put up with him. end of anxiety tw

so his schooldays mostly looked like … doing nothing, playing games, having fun with his mates, getting high, forgetting his homework, stressing about homework, and somewhere, in a tiny corner of his being, worrying about the war. whenever those worries started coming up, though, he was able to push them away, because the war was not yet there, not for him at least. there was graduation to worry about first, and once that was done, then he could worry about the war.

post graduation - now ( 1978 - 1980 )

peter joins the order along with his friends, because it was what was right. peter believes in their cause, hates the death eaters, hates discrimination and racism and terrorism --- of course he fucking does, and so he joins, even though he feels incompetent. i have written a lot about this in his app too, which is linked above! 

he starts working as a dishwasher in muggle glasgow, preferring a bit of a break from the wizarding world every now and then. peter’s not unambitious, per se, but he doesn’t have enough faith in himself to try and pursue a career ( and besides, what’s the point in the midst of a war? ). plus, peter doesnt need any more stress on his plate, and dish washing is laidback and at least kind of fun. 

depression & weed & eating disorder (bed/bulimia) tw | peter feels useless in the order, though. he seems to lack the skills, the guts, the everything that the people around him have. before, their heroics mightve inspired him; now they just make him feel like a shitty person, like a burden. peter starts secluding himself a little, hiding in his mother’s home. he smokes more pot. he sometimes goes almost week without seeing someone besides his mum and his coworkers. he watches too much telly and reads comics and drowns in fictional worlds and he becomes depressed. he sinks into it without noticing and can’t come back from it. his eating habits ( which have always bordered on unhealthy ) turn worse; peter binges, and then restricts, falls into a cycle. it’s the only routine he has.

when he’s around his friends, he lives up a little. he cracks jokes and wants to play games and laughs and feels a bit more alive, but he always craves his time on his own. that’s his new way to feel safe: to stick to his newly found routine, hidden in his room, away from reality. | end of tw

the idea to join the death eaters comes out of fear. peter feels like the order is losing, and feels like death is inevitable. i dont know how true this is, but the fact is that the death eaters are ruthless and that his life is on the line because of his position. i wrote a Lot about this in his app too, so if u want a more comprehensive explanation i’d def read it here, its the second hc!

he joins, because he thinks it will give him a saver position. play both sides, play for the winning side --- he’s always had a bit of an opportunistic streak, which definitely helps sway his decision. in the end he’s just afraid of dying, and that’s why he joins; he’s twenty, his life has hardly started --- he doesn’t want to die, no cause is worth that, none at all. ( he should have just ran )

he joins in may 1978, for timeline reasons, so he’s been a death eater for only a few months. it’s been a lot different than he imagined ----- peter thought he’d blend in the background quietly, that he’d have to do shitty jobs ( which is true ) and that he’d be left alone. he underestimated it, because well --- he was desperate when he joined, and he didn’t think about the consequences, and he didn’t think about how voldemort’s cruelty wasn’t just reserved for his enemies but for his followers, too. there’s no stepping out of line with the death eaters; mistakes are not treated lightly and peter --- afraid, a bit of a bumbling idiot, learns this quite soon.

his function is mostly just to be a spy; relay information and share plans, name members, etcetera. he’s not very active because he’s a spy, but i imagine that he is present at the bigger meetings. AND FML HE’S GOOD AT IT! he’s good at lying and sneaking and being a sly bastard --- he used those skills for pranks, once. now he uses it to betray his fellow prankers : D

peter, at that point, hates himself. he’s always had a bit of self loathing, but it’s gained the upper hand now and he’s drowning in it; it does allow for him to ignore his conscience, though, for him to ignore the reality and just stew in his negativity. he’s got a woe is me mentality, for sure, and he’s so god damn passive about his situation. 

timeclash reaction.

peter’s reaction to the timeclash was ... a lot. i wrote about it in his app, so if u want to read my whole ass rambling, i rec that. but tldr: he’s shocked, at what he becomes. the peter he is now is a traitor, yes, but he’s not yet the person who ends up betraying james and lily and harry, who frames sirius --- and it’s ground shattering to find out that he’s on the road to become such a person. 

self destructiveness, weed, alcohol tw / his self loathing grows more. peter wasn’t doing very well before, but the timeclash makes something snap inside him --- he abandons his needs, punishes himself in small ways, loses sight of himself. he drinks and smokes too much. he’s so scared of himself. he’s in hiding, when he first finds out, scared of his friends and the death eaters and the order members and the people from the future who have met a worse version of him end of tws

part of peter is also like “i havent done any of these things yet, i know i am not the BEST person but i am still . not That Bad! stop being mad for something i havent done yet!”

around this time, he’s realising that he can either keep hiding, that he can completely destroy himself and all the ties he has, or he can take this opportunity to change his course. to not become the person all these people from the future know, to change change change, to make up for the wrongs he has committed and the wrongs he will commit if he keeps on going the way he is --- and that’s where he’s at now.

on another hand, he definitely watched all the star wars movies that came out over the past 50 yrs and hates kylo ren and cried when han died!!! he is in awe of the mcu movies but also thinks they did the comics dirty. i wish someone would introduce him to video games bc he would cry from happiness.

personality & details

OKAY onto the fun stuff, that was way too depressing and peter is usually a comedic icon

peter parker is his favourite superhero just because … they share a first name and because peter parker is a bit of an underdog too and peter is just like! amazing! he named his owl parker.

he hates cats. used to love them — he was allowed to take the cat from home with him to hogwarts when he was eleven, but he brought him back home after an unfortunate incident where his cat nearly ate him while he was in his animagus form. “sorry ma, i don’t love him any more. here. have him.”

peter is actually a solid cook. this is because he learned to make some basic food when he was still a kid, first with his grandma, and later on his own. he liked doing it for his mother and he was. .. good at it? peter is also just passionate about food and finds comfort in cooking. breakfast food and baked goods are Prime Food Categories.

he is asexual af, panromantic. has kissed both guys and gals and nb pals but did not like it??? confused. does not understand sexuality and all that jazz but tries not to think abt it because like! he’s got enough stress! doesnt need to think abt this!

peter is also agender, but i think he’s a lot less aware about this, because it’s confusing and so he just tries not to think about it. he does feel okay with he/him pronouns, but just doesn’t feel connected at all to being a boy/man

peter has abandonment issues because his dad, well, never even bothered to be there. not even for a second. he’s just constantly scared that people will leave and it’s funny, because he will probably end up abandoning all of his loved ones KDJFHSDF.

peter is quite non confrontational but also not … meek? he just avoids it, either by physically staying out of people’s way or by dismissing most of the things said and getting out of there. a Passive Kid. 

he’s such a fucking dork i swear to god. but he’s funny! peter is really funny. i deeply believe in this. he makes great puns and is able to just come out of nowhere and make a comment that just. hits the nail right on its head.

peter curses a lot and has a scottish accent and sometimes he will have a minute long cursing session that no one rly understands.

#quantum intro #this is . long ig

[seagreen-meets-grey]

shoutout to my friend @astrangetypeofchemistry because she’s awesome and only deserves best.

babe you’re not garbage in any way.

what if you never clicked on that percabeth fanfiction i wrote so long ago? what if you never reviewed?

i answered you and you kept reviewing and i kept answering you and we were like why stop talking and now our chat has like 1.8k messages

and although our only way to communicate is social media you’ve become this part of my life that i’d miss so much if it were gone

hey remember that one time we actuallly skyped? whY diD w e oNL y ev Er dO tH i S ONCE maybe because I’m too insecure about talking to someone who speaks english perfectly and I’m like how horrible would it be if i made a really stupid mistake or slip into an accent or what if the connection’s terrible and i can’t hear what she’s saying properly and well yeah i guess that’s why from my part lol

i know you tend to hate on yourself and so have i once and sometimes still am but i learned to live with myself and i hope you will too some day and just remember that every time you said something nice to me i smiled and my self-hatred flipped me off as it shrunk, at least for that moment, and i say thank you for that you beautiful soul

i remember the very first thing you said to me when we were skyping, it was something along the lines of, ‘wow. you’re really pretty.’ and just know that it made my day

i love how we dig the same things like percy jackson and harry potter and mlb and b99 and taste in music and i always forget how you’re actually a few years younger than me

y’know if i lived in the usa i’d come to your house whenever you feel like garbage and i’d tell bad puns like really bad puns, you know how i can get sometimes and show you that you’re able to make me smile until you feel better

because you matter

and when not if because we’re doing this we finally meet in person i’m gonna crush you with a hug, prepare for that. if you die young, it’s because i hugged you too hard.

despite what people are saying i am not good with words, at least not like this, but i’m 100% honest when i say that you’re great and matter and you’d never be a burden and i’d love to actually get to know you.

and do you wanna know one of the many reasons why i’m so psyched for the b99 hiatus to end? because we’ll be watching it together, only from different locations, and our snaps and reactions and fangirling in general is what i love sm.

always remember that you can make someone feel better by simply showing them you think of them which makes them smile and probably keeps them from doing something very stupid in that very moment so imo that makes you a potential life saver and shows you matter.

see how i’m basically rambling rn cause i’m so bad at this?

i hope i got my point across

I LOVE YOU OKAY?

maja out.

#even internet friends are friends #during the time i just spend writing this i could have done something productive like having a shower #but i chose to do this #and now my hair looks still bad #but i don't care #cause i love you girl #♥ #see this is what happens when you say bad things about yourself in your snapchat story