#countless heart attavks

[starsambrosia]

Ouch oof ouch ouch ow that immortality really do be making being alive literal hell tehe heho

My mind feels like it's splitting open my chest feels like it's shattering and yes folks this is physical ailments haha not even spiritual this time tehe

Gods look at these cutie fishes tho

#today went ok actually i just overdid it after my five consecutive seizures and the actual wordt medical care haha and anyways #whats a little heart ache a little tear in the seems a wee bit if torture in the bones a tad spice of nerological damadge #after all #countless heart attavks #countless seizures #oh cant even imagen the times i drowned #and that whole waking up at the bottom if a ditch with a branch impaled in my shoulder just to crawl out covered in blood and mud #for everyone to stare right through me like i wasnt even there #blacked out and ohohoeheheohohoho nobody knows what happened in that white cement room with solid white bars #the broken down room directly across with glass and barbed wire all over #the room to the right that was barred and locked tight with windoes covered that we were told never to look too long into #she called my birthname you know #she calked my birth name and i followed her right into a foredt and off a cliff #into a ravine #and i watched her stand iver me and smile all ethyrial #i watched my bones snap bavk into place #i watched my body contort and twist to fix itself #there is no death as horrific as coming back to life and being aware of every excruciating second of it #to feel your insides twist and snap just to solidify once more #to feel everything gradually slide into place #and then there you are #covered in blood. reminded again. no one. #no one. #is ever #going #to #save #you #so get up. #climb