#cuz yk. they didn’t try fighting to the death

[mimi-croissant]

They would get along so well

#nimona #ambrosius goldenloin #THE MOVIE VERSIONS WOULD BE GREAT FRIENDS I THINK #cuz yk. they didn’t try fighting to the death

[wannaseewhatshangin]

Hey, I hear you’re out of ideas 😏😏😏

What ab a Sodapop x reader (or pony or Darry ig cuz they live in the same house) with a girl next door kinda trope ??

Like she just moved next door and theres immediate chemistry 💪 or yknow, whatever you want ur the writer LMAO

You can do headcanons if you want (I very much like ur other hcs😎) or write it however way you wnat

or don’t, ur choice LMAOO

Omg I literally love you. bc I was just on the brink of death and you just saved me. I will DEFINITELY ask that for you. I’ll do sodapop first then pony and Darry you’ll get 3 diff versions?? MAYBE THO ofc they won’t be on the same page but still. Maybe I’ll do a Dallas one too but buck will have to make a room for you too bc yk..yeah anyway I hope you like it and PLEASE private message me bc I LOVE your energy but tell me that your the one that made this request so I know it’s you. <3 and PLEASE I want to hear more requests from you.

Sodapop x next door! Reader (before and when you are dating) ❤️

So basically, you moved in and he was like ‘who da fuq is movin in?’ In his head LMFAO

He ignored it, thinkin it wasn’t important.

Then he saw you through your window..

He looked at you for a little.

Not wanting to be creepy tho but he still couldn’t help looking at you.

He saw you outside when he was at the park, dude..he’s still a teenager yall think he not gon play on that swing set? Think again.(LMFAOOO)

Chile anyway. You were 2 swings down from him.

And he would look at you and look away when you would look at him.

You decided to make a small convo.

“..uh my name is y/n. I just moved here 2 days ago.”

He was kinda shocked that you said something to him.

“I know. I saw the moving truck outside. You’re my neighbor. I’m sodapop.” He said with a smile. (His smile ahgdjsnsh)

“That’s a cool name.”

“Thanks I like your name too.”

Y’all ended up playing tag (STOP! I DONT LIKE THIS GAME! 💀)

This is the best he has felt in a while since sandy left.

Y’all ended up being friends, talking about anything, playing at the park.

The park was y’all’s daily thing.

Especially at night. (Idk why but parks just hit diff especially when your friends are there lol)

You would notice him blush when you looked at him.

Best believe that y’all write on paper and tape it to y’all’s windows. (Yes. I used to like Taylor swift when I was 10 leave me alone)

If you go to school he would wake up just to say bye to you before you left.

And would wait for you to come back the whole time.

You almost made him want to go back to school. LMFAO.

And if you don’t go to school you will go to the DX with him and hang out with him while he works on cars or at the counter.

Y’all laugh so hard when y’all are at the park and at the DX..y’all almost got in trouble once lmfao.

Y’all talk about LITERALLY anything.

The boys catching on to his act and realizing that he likes you. Aw cute.

He finally tells you that he likes you.

Y’all are at the park laying in the grass.

And you say “Hey you know I like hanging out with you..”

He looks at you and says “and I like you.”

He realized what he said and looked away while blushing.

You didn’t know what he meant by that.

And you didn’t want to just assume that he had a crush on you so you asked.

“In what way?”

He looked at you and smiled.

“More than a friend. I’m in love with you and I understand if you don’t feel the same wa-“

You cut him off with a kiss. AHH so cute!!

“Is that a yes?”

“Soda..be fuckin for real.(LMFAO) Of course it’s a yes I just kissed you dummy.”

He sneaks into your bedroom through your window and cuddles with you.

Constant “I love you’s” from him.

The gang loves you.

You hang out with them all the time.

They just hope you’re not like Sandy.

You prove them wrong when they find you two in his room play fighting and giggling and kissing back and forth. And when they hear “I love you” wars.

They know your not like her. Duh. We ain’t fake.

Sodapop loves you with his whole heart.

This boy has so much love for you that when your away from him he actually cries.

The boys try to comfort him but if they ain’t you they can see theirselves out. There’s 👉the door 🚪.

When you come back the boy literally make you catch him and kisses you all over your face.

He is such a sweetheart please take care of him. He loves you so much. <3

#dallas winston headcanons #dallas winston x reader #sodapop headcanons #johnny cade #johnny cade headcanons #johnny cade x reader #sodapop x reader #ponyboy curtis #ponyboy headcanons #ponyboy x reader

[aita-blorbos]

AITA for killing a guy?

So where I grew up was like all culty, out in the woods, isolated, don’t like outsiders and such. Everyone there sucks. My whole life I tried to prove myself to them but they just weren’t having it. I was a weird little freak and they didn’t know my mom and my dad left so ig that just made me defective or something. Anyways, my big day finally came where I could prove myself without it being subjective opinion or anything. Just plain and simple black and white. Nothing complicated about it. The new second in command was going to be chosen.

How that works is anyone who wants to try to get the newly opened position can volunteer to go in the fight pit basically. Everyone who volunteers goes in at the same time and it’s a big fight to the death (or until forfeit). The only rules once you’re in there basically are: you can’t leave the pit without forfeiting, you can’t kill someone who has forfeited and must allow them to safely leave the pit, you can’t un-forfeit, and the last one remaining gets to be second in command. Very simple rules, no one ever breaks them cuz there’s so few and stuff. People also tend to forfeit rather than die and most people don’t wanna kill the people they grew up with so there doesn’t tend to be as much deatb as you’d think there would be in a “fight to the death.”

Anyways, the big day. I volunteer ofc cuz then if I win, everyone will have to respect me and see me for my skills and how much I’ve trained and everything. My two former best friends (they don’t know what the internet is so I can use their names, haha (ooc: these are ocs. Using names won’t spoil any media or anything). Python F and Leaf M. I basically grew up with them. Python stole the job I had wanted for my whole life tho so I hated her a bit and then the two of them stopped talking to me and pretended we were never friends) also volunteered for the fight. Yayyy… Also I overheard them plotting before the actual fight. Python didn’t even want to become second in command. She was just helping Leaf become second in command so he could impress his stupid mom (she sucks. And that’s not just my opinion, like she objectively sucks. Not the point tho). I feel like that shouldn’t be allowed, but the rules say nothing about it so whatever. I didn’t say anything and it’s not like anyone would listen to me anyways. I’m still pissed about it tho

Fight happens, blah blah, long story short, I dropped some big rocks that were like loose along the walls of the pit on Leaf and the person he was fighting, which would be fine and dandy except for the fact that right as I did so and couldn’t stop the rocks from falling anymore, the guy Leaf was fighting forfeitted, making it so I *technically* killed someone who forfeitted and therefore not only eliminating me, but also getting me sentenced tl the death tunnels (exactly what it sounds like) cuz I killed someone I wasn’t allowed to and yk, murder is bad and all. Then freaking Python got second in command, stealing the job I wanted for a second time, but not only that! Her role was effective immediately. She just watched as I was taken away to the death tunnels and didn’t say a word. Didn’t use her new role to even *try* to save her childhood best friend. Like yeah, I hate her guts, but I find it hard to believe that I’d just stand by and watch her get sentenced to the tunnels without a single word. And everyone says I’m the heartless one! She didn’t even want the job!! If she saved me and everything got cleared up and I wasn’t found to be guilty of illegal murder, I could have taken the job she didn’t want anyways. I could be second and everything would be fine!

Yeah, I did in fact kill two people and not feel bad about it really, but that was allowed. It was legal murder and they knew what they were signing up for. The only issue is that technically that guy forfeitted. What was I supposed to do?? Reverse gravity????? I can’t just suddenly gain magical powers to reverse stuff. If I could’ve stopped the rocks from hitting the guy, I would’ve, but there was absolutely zero way for me to do so so idk what they expect of me. They just saw a chance to get rid of me and also not have me as the second of command, so they took it.

Anyways, though, I know I’m not the asshole, but I need to prove to someone that I’m in the right so I need more people to agree with me. Thanks in advance for helping prove I’m in the right B)

#aita #am i the asshole #unreality

[ringmyheart]

Dating Johan headcanons? Your Vinjin one was literal ✨gold✨ and yk so now i'm super curious about how you'd think dating Johan would be like.

Thank you!! 😭 I hope I did this well <33 also a warning, skip to where I wrote [HERE] if you’re uncomfortable w reading anything ab religion. Also I didn’t mean to offend any religion I am religious myself and didn’t specify any to avoid saying something incorrectly !

If you’re religious, he’s very VERY wary and cautious. Not of you but of the people you’re with, and it worries him a LOT

If u tell him ur hanging out with church friends he’s either insisting he comes too or asking a suspicious amount of questions of ur whereabouts and watching u from afar. He’ll probably step in on accident cuz he saw them like reach for ur shoulder or smmn and intervene cuz he thought like u were ab to get kidnapped but they were just gonna bring ur awareness to the food store around u, he’d be so on edge

He doesn’t like entering churches but if u go and u won’t negotiate on wether u can or can’t go, he’ll risk it all and come too

He’ll rough up the preacher after the service tho like “what’s your thing ???? Like what do you do.” And ask them questions completely unrelated and honestly kind of confusing to intimidate them

Like, “oh so this is all u do? U just preach?”

“Uh, yeah I love my job and am devoted. :) 👍”

“u have no other job? Nothing?”

“No...”

“R u married?”

“Yep!”

“Yeah, that’s what I thought.”

“What??”

And he meant like yeah good keep ur eyes off of u his s/o or SMM but it came out off putting and frankly indiscernible 😭

While in the service he might even start to shake cuz he’s so worried if he sees AC or hears it running he’ll grab ur hand and book it cuz he thinks ur being poisoned 😭

[HERE]

Likes to share things with you, like clothes and all. U know that black jacket he always wears it’s also ALWAYS on u too

Half of it is cuz he’s stingy w money naturally so it’s like less money spent if u guys r sharing ur food and clothes and all

So ur always wearing his stuff but in return he’s always wearing urs and like even shoes. If ur taller than him and have clothes that were his size he has ur old wardrobe in his closet now as hand me downs

HE PROBABLY wraps ur shirt around his wrist as a good luck charm before fights. Before he gets into a showdown he’ll wrap it around like his arm and kiss it and say ur name or whatever and he swears if he does this tradition he cannot lose he won’t let himself

Because u don’t spend much money, u have wired earphones (nothing wrong w that ofc) HOWEVER if ur listening to music together and he runs into someone he has beef with he’ll start swinging and ur just there like 🧍🏽‍♀️ cuz the earphones r still connected and he’s fighting to the death w like sweet but psycho playing in the background

He loves physical activities to do together. If ur not active u probably will be now forcefully bc he’ll be like please and u can’t say no so now ur hiking every day

Forgets to wait up for u bc he gets rlly ahead of himself the amount of times u get lost on the trail is unbelievable and he eventually establishes the “if u lose me, HUG A TREE AND I WILL FIND YOU” rule w u and now three times a week ur hugging a tree and waiting for him to come pick u up in the middle of the woods

He’ll apologize and tries to teach u the layout but u don’t memorize it ever

Also loves biking and gets u matching bikes, likes walking the dogs w u, going on runs etc. if u cannot run he grabs ur hand and is all its okay u got this :)) like thanks for the sentiment but it doesn't help💀

DO NOT DO HOBBIES W THIS MF!!!!!!!!! If u like to dance and tell him he’ll do it with you and within two days he leagues better than you it would suck

He is so good at picking things up if u play just dance for fun he will kick ur ass and ur like bro I thought we were just playing having fun wtf 😕 and he genuinely wasn’t even trying

So if ur competitive don’t put him on the hobbies ur into cuz he will start it a beginner and be better than u within three days

He’ll feel so bad tho if he finds out u don’t like it. Like when u drew stuff he’d sit by u and draw too and when u saw he was advancing to surpass u u stopped. He thought u just grew out of it but finds u in like a closet drawing to hide from him

But he loves doing stuff ur interested in w u even if it’s something he was never into. If u like it he likes it by association

The type of boyfriend to buy you ten fruits if you say you like one.

In passing you mention liking watermelon the next day you come home there are ten on your counter and he’s like hey :DD!

Gets you a matching dog god jacket like him so u two and ur dogs r matching always

He doesn’t care if you’re wrong, he will die defending you!!! U r always in the right what do u mean the total cost is 10.00$?? What do u mean it says 10$ on the register?? They said it was 8$ u heard them

He’s pretty reserved when it comes to personal stuff and just everything in general. U will be three years into the relationship and realize u don’t know what his last name is??!!!

He’s a “I didn’t see why it was so important” mf... if u ask ab his past or occupation he’ll tell you but in a way that underplays it extremely. Because he isn’t that ready to be vulnerable and open up as well as thinking u might not care or you’ll leave him

He’s a pretty jump-y person because he had to be alert and on his toes most of the time. If you surprise him by accident by being too quiet then appearing right by him he’ll jump three feet up like a cat or sock you in the face then apologize profusely and tear up feeling horrible

He’s pretty perceptive but when caught off gaurd he gets very nervous, can’t help it

While watching tv shows or bingeing a series he will narrate everytning to u. Because he really enjoys the show and wants to make sure u understand in the fullest too and enjoy it. If he didn’t understand sometning in the beginning but then understands you HAVE to know too

“Oh my god he just shot him....”

“The dog RUNS AWAY!?”

“She said she loves him oh my gosh...”

“They’re kissing?”

Like yes Johan.... we know.... if you tell him he’ll stop but it’s like programmed in his DNA to not shut up while watching tv he can’t help it

He’ll also pause the show to turn to u and go “I KNOW HIM!!”

And ur like “rlly?? OMGG”

And he’ll go “YEAH he’s also in that other show remember :O” and u realize he does not know him recognizes him

😑😔 .

He’s not that updated on internet and how humor has progressed over the past few years so if u send him any meme over 2015 he will be so confused

Send this and he’ll text back “😅 why did you send me this?”

“Is that sonic?”

“Are these your texts with someone?”

Otherwise he’s a pretty normal texted. He uses punctuation sometimes which will throw u off gaurd cuz it will be like “I love you.” And it’s like sweet but why did he add the period?? But he doesn’t always so it’s regular

If playing sports or doing something competitive he threatens everyone in the beginning to let you win and always lets u get the score/goal/net, whatever. He pulls everyone into him prengame by their collar and is like “listen ur letting them win got that. If I see u take that ball from them....”

He’s a helicopter boyfriend he is always seeing what ur doing what ur up to how u are, etc. protective to a fault basically

Holds u back when crossing the street as if ur seven years old

I have more I could say, but I’ll inevitable write another johan relationship hcs some day again so I’ll save it for then 😅 I hope this was what I wanted! Thank you for requesting ❤️❤️

#Johan x reader #Johan seong x reader #Lookism x reader #Lookism #Johan seong

[kung-fu-headcanons]

Hello, I'm wondering if you have ideas for Master Council HCs? It can either single character, bond of a pair or three of them. Thank you!!! :

I find it hilarious how I didn't know who they were until I searched it up BAHHAHAHA I WAS LIKE "OH YEAH ITS THESE GUYS"

I'm gonna do all three cuz along the way you can drift off into a pair and just a single character lol

According to the wiki Rhino is DEAD HELLO WHAT HOW SINCE WHEN

Nvm it says that he died by one of Shen's cannons I do not remember that- but then again it's been so long since I've seen KFP 2 lol anyways

Not only did Rhino's death make Croc and Ox lose faith in kung fu it was also a really personal attack because they were really close friends beforehand

Idk what info from Secrets of the Masters is canon and not but assuming it's all canon, the entire stuff with Oogway and the Wu sisters really made them recognize each other's talents and the journey had been become really good pals

Croc and Ox honestly thought that once Shen took over they would be back doing street fighting like they did when they were younger

Because they said that kung fu was dead when Po and the others went to rescue them

I really hate how apparently Secrets of the Masters is non canon to the films

Anyways the reason Ox can figure out an enemies weakness so quickly comes from how observant he is

He's always been a very observant person I mean this dude always sneaking out to watch Master Rhino spar so.. like obviously it was for a different reasons but shhh

I feel like being a bandit has never exactly sat right with Croc despite him having been the leader of the infamous Wool Stealing Crocodile Bandits of Crocodile Island because when Rhino sparred him he was really moved by it and immediately quit his bandit ways yk

So happy his origins are unknown 😏 now I can do WHATEVER I want-

Rhino: looks like he can kill you but is actually somft

Sort of

I'm just trying to say that he may look intimidating but he's actually very nice

There's literally no way Rhino has only taught Croc and Ox he must have taught other people as well I literally cannot believe he's only taught two people

#also i saw your other request you dont need to worry about me swearing cuz i dont do cussing anymore oof #so yeah you dont need to worry about that :D! #kung fu panda #kung fu panda headcanons #kung fu panda hcs #kung fu panda hdcs #kung fu panda masters council #kung fu panda kung fu council #kung fu panda croc #kung fu panda thundering rhino #kung fu panda storming ox #kfp #kfp headcanons #kfp hcs #kfp hdcs #kfp masters council #kfp kung fu council #kfp croc #kfp thundering rhino #kfp storming ox

[vox-blr]

Voxxy ilu (/p) and i wanna hear more about ur canon. Tell me what your house or business looked like. Tell me where you got coffee, if you did. How you found Vark. Your relationship with Velvet. How you climbed the ranks. Why you fell to Hell in the first place!

How did you consume things? Could your face play me a cartoon? Were u n Ally like....... Like maybe a lil ♠ in a noromo way or like. Cuz like. :/ y'all straight GOOFY together

💙🖤💙🖤 hehehe

You're in for sooo much info tbh one thing I remember well is Locations

I moved around somewhat early on but after becoming Rich As Fuck I had a high-rise apartment that basically took up half the floor, which is massive for an apartment. I guess I could've afforded a mansion or some shit but it was already way more space than I needed and I didn't want to have to maintain grounds or have anyone coming to my house to do it for me so. Luxury apartment

In terms of aesthetics it was mostly dark walls and shiny black floors and grey/black furniture. There were neon lights lining a lot of corners but I didn't always keep them on, fluorescents for if I actually needed good lighting.

I did have a whole room that was just massive TVs and like a swivel chair. It was like a master controller setup but Upgraded a shitton

Business was uhhh Big

There was a main office I was usually at and a bunch of satellite places for different things, plus I owned (majority or just shares depending) smaller companies with their own offices, and the lot of them made more shows we broadcasted than anything originating from my company directly

But main office was a tall building, had a lot of windows, and was mostly for businessy shit like PR and Threatening People Over The Phone. Yk yk, the works. We had some tech shit going on there too, like a massive room of just data storage

My office in that building was nice desk, computer, lots of monitors (on the desk and on the wall), drafting table attachment, tablet. Like the TV Room™ but smaller

I spent a lot of time on site though with filming and broadcasting crews, both in satellite offices and on-location type folming, though mostly the former. These varied in how they looked

Coffee I got 90% of the time from the coffee maker in my house or office 💀💀 or wherever was closest if I was out or not too busy to go out

I got Vark at an animal store. It was like a pet store but people also went there to grab an animal for dinner, so. Animal store. He was a baby (a 5 foot tall baby but a Baby nonetheless) but grew Very Fast and ended up doubling that within a year 💖💖💖🦈🦈🦈

Velvet and I hung out at least every couple of days. We got along well mostly bc of similar hobbies, and we also kind of balanced each other out. Velvet went by emotions when doing shit and I went by logic, so she'd have fun ideas for shit and I could minimize any sort of fallout.

The downside was that Velvet also went by emotions when dealing with problems, which meant she could be petty and childish to the point of causing issues. We didn't really fight, but her behavior sometimes caused problems when I had issues with people she liked or if she had issues with people I worked with

As for climbing the ranks, it was really straightforward tbh.

It was the early 50s. TV was just getting big, and that has a little bit of a delay to get to Hell in the first place. I saw the opportunity and took it. After working out some money early on working for other people- mostly acting- I started broadcasting, buying existing channels up, networking, etc. It all built up very fast and there wasn't even a lot of sabotage involved?? Like obviously there was Some and I was totally cheating the people I bought from out of a lot of money but the timing was so perfect that it was a comparatively very clean chain of events.

This pretty much destroyed the popularity of radio in Hell, aided by the fact that I initially sold actual TVs dirt cheap to aid my broadcasting.

As I accumulated more money, I started buying and creating completely unrelated companies, which was less about money and more about heehee hoohoo look at me I sell chimken borger

As for falling to Hell in the first place, pretty sure it was an accumulation of smaller shitty actions for the most part. I was very cutthroat in my work and trying to advance and made a lot of very con-artisty deals with people and was just generally selfish most of the time I was alive. I definitely somewhat indirectly contributed to some deaths too so like 💀💀 mostly via causing people to lose their jobs

There might be more I'm forgetting but I think I was mostly nerf'd for being a capitalist dick

I ate things With My Mouth

Basically demon physics screen was kind of like the screen in the grudge. It's a solid screen but it's also Not in some situations. Combination screen/p̤͑͐o͖͇ͬ̒͘͘͢͞r̲̠̓ͮ́͐́͞͡t̵̖̩̬͓̂̃͆a̢̽̔̂̀͢͠l̾̊́̿͏̶̕ ̪̹̬̀̈̍̏t̵ͣͮ̚҉o̢͙̼ͦ͐̔̑̕͢͢ͅ ̰͙͙͉ͯ̈́̈́̿t̵͔̊͐̆̅h͕ͪ̓͆e̓̋ͣ̿͢͠ ͈͛̓͆҉̶̀u̥̜͓͇ͩ̀͘̕͝n̴̲̹k̷̜̔̑́͢͝ň̛̟̮̣͌̀o̡̮̔w̞̪̜̹̅͛̓͘ň̢̛̳̰̫̿́͠ depending on the context.

Random note, newest face was an LCD screen.

It could play a cartoon.

Also lmao as for Al? Hard to define rlly. I'll p much roll with attention of any nature and Alastor was >:( at me so I went w it

I was very heehee hoohoo look u radio i'm in the tv screens u pass when u go outside! pay attention to me! video killed the radio star! i am very funny and Alastor was Very annoyed by my existence, moreso after I started with the upgrades a few years into being in Hell. We had a few amicable conversations before that

I was also familiar with who Alastor was before dying so there was also an aspect of like if this fucker respects me i've made it

Thanks for asking lmao I could talk for Ages

#this was fun #vox's lore #vox answers #canon shit #vox posts #vark #velvet #alastor #angel #vox's demon physics

[greensconnor]

i’m asking about your dragon age characters

molly i would KILL for u im ur personal hitman now

anyway i said my city now because the entire bioware writing team sucks shit xoxo and i’m so much smarter than all of them but also fully incapable of having a normal amount of ocs for anything (see: the time i made 20 rwby ocs in less than two weeks) so i have. five worldstates here r some assorted thoughts

uhhh so the worldstates r as follows

eira mahariel (two-handed berserk/champ spec), rhett hawke (two-handed berserk spec), alas lavellan (mage knight enchanter spec), romanced alistair/fenris/dorian respectively

shiv tabris (dual wield duelist/assassin spec), radella “rads” hawke (mage spirit healer spec), kat adaar (two-handed reaver spec), romanced morrigan/isabela/cassandra respectively because im a pc gamer and i think i should be able to date whatever video game woman i like because im infinitely better than cishet men

this world state said yeah i respect mens rights. mens rights to shut the fuck up

twins bronson (sword/shield reaver spec) & bryant cousland (archer ranger spec), carmine hawke (archer assassin spec), syracuse trevelyan (dual wield tempest spec), romanced zevran/anora/josephine/bull. if ur wondering how that works my city now and the warden, hawke and the inquisitor should all meet and so they do because i Said So

riva amell (mage arcane warrior/battlemage spec), graham “gray” hawke (mage force spec), hellathen “hela” lavellan (archer assassin spec); romanced cullen/anders and later blackwall because hawke only likes men who will break his heart. hela doesn’t have a romance because she’s literally 20. who let her lead the inquisition (me it was me). also it should be noted the version of cullen i have in my head only vaguely resembles actual cullen because i write better than dragon age writers ever could and i gave him an Actual Cohesive Narrative and he gets bullied relentlessly for being scrawnier than his mage boyfriend

malien “mal” surana (mage spirit healer/keeper spec), jules hawke (sword/shield reaver spec), ash adaar (mage rift spec), romanced leliana/merrill/krem because i should have been able to kiss krem and its a Crime that i am not allowed to

knight enchanter is a Very op specialization and by Very op i mean it makes a mage with their built-in low constitution stats able to solo the biggest baddest dragon in the game on nightmare mode in under five minutes so like. alas lavellan fist fights dragons for fun send tweet

i think lavellans should be able to hit ppl with bricks for all the shit they endure. thus solas gets pranked by mahariel and alas by which i mean they just tip buckets of water onto him from the rookery

kat might be my only competent inquisitor but she did also try to knock out the right hand of the divine and attempt to gap even tho there’s fucky magic burning up her hand so does she have a brain cell? you decide

also its fantasy land and i do what i want so kat has blue/gold sectoral heterochromia

gray “mage rights” hawke is best friends with fenris which surprises literally everyone. their friendship started because they got into a fist fight and then they were like okay i respect u now. hawke is like hey fenris give me ur sword i have a fun trick to show u [uses his sword as a foci to zap carver in the ass with lightning]

i am Always thinking abt like how cullen could have been one man anti-chantry propaganda machine if he hadn’t so blatantly been shoehorned into every game past origins so anyway bioware forgot about a wholeass moon i can write what i like. [holds up cullen by the scruff of his stupid armor] not only are you bisexual you are also a bottom

i also Hate the whole uwu mage haters get fixed by romancing a mage

unlocked secret dialogue option where my inquisitors verbally cuss out dorian’s dad instead of whatever sympathetic narrative the writers were going for cuz its bullshit.

riva is a showoff and a Menace about being as good as he is because he unabashedly loves being a mage and hes like oooh look at me im sexy i dont need to use my hands to cast magic because i’m just that good ;)) and you know what. hes right.

gray, on the other hand, does Not want to be mage. he wants to be a druffalo farmer and retire in the hinterlands and be left the fuck alone. unfortunately he is gay and has one brain cell and terrible, terrible taste in men. ribbed relentlessly for this by riva (altho does he have room to talk hes been hung up on cullen since he was like 13)

shiv is trans n kieran is the result of doing the dark ritual with her wife and he looks a Lot like shiv (dark skin pointed ears, shock-white hair) and morrigan always just Assumed she dyed it or did something magic with it so seeing their kid come out like that was a WEIRD time for her

leliana almost Murdered by cassandra in worldstate 5 because the warden is Actually There The Whole Time, but its been 10 years, mal’s cut off all her hair and gotten full facial tattoos and she’s like “no one will know its me its fine” and she’s right. she gets away with it. only cullen like, Knows, because he knew her before the blight but he doesnt have a death wish n he like. will Not piss her off

shes dalish by birth n she was stolen from her clan by templars and thus is vehemently anti-circle and anti-chantry in general

uhhh the vallaslin (elf face tattoos) of my 4 dalish characters are:

eira = ghilan’nain (chose em cuz shes rlly interested in the navigation aspect of the goddess)

alas = falon’din (god of the dead n he picked them because he’s Also the god of fortune and alas is like tee hee fun but also he can and will kill u if u fuck with him so yk its fitting)

hela = june (god of the craft bc she likes to Make things but june is also the god who taught the elves 2 hunt and hela is. a hunter.)

mal = elgar’nan (allfather/god of vengeance bc. she is Vengeful. she is Angry. but yk fucking with shem politics and fucking their divine is like. mal may have little a retribution. as a treat.) yes she has the full half-face solid colour tattoo she does NOT fuck around.

bronson and bryant r not genetically identical but they Look similar enough 2 anyone who doesn’t know them well enough 2 play spot the distance. anora and bronson think this is a super fun game to play, especially when nobles realize they’ve swapped out the king but they’re too nervous to say anything

eira mahariel has two hands. one is for holding hands with alistair and the other is for throttling elven gods, apparently. she’s killed one before so solas she’s coming for your bitch ass next. watch urself.

speaking of eira and alistair are married thru dalish tradition and humans don’t recognize it n alistair loves 2 re-propose to her with random things. he’ll just pick up like. a bit of cheese and be like “marry me ;)” and she’s like GASP but whatever will the chantry say!!!! all of their friends r sick of them

“vhenan if you love me bring me a sword” “you think i could do better than a sword made out of space rock?” “:)”

eira is my youngest hero at 18 at the start of her game and kat is my oldest at 32 at the start of her game.

none of my hawkes are under six foot. rhett is the tallest (6′8″) and rads is the shortest (6′2″).

syracuse trevelyan would have been the Perfect inquisitor if he were not a pretty boy himbo and a gay bastard who does Most Things just to spite his parents.

[corypheus pointing at syracuse’s visage in his crystal orb thingo] i want that twink obliterated

i love the companions from older games return thing i truly do so i make it a point for Every companion to return in inquisition so the gang rlly is all here because i am a Slutte for found family

i lie in my keep worldstates because i dont want to choose between hawke and alistair during here lies the abyss but i never make him king and every time i play inquisition and cole has the wicked grace line it makes me Scream. alistair baby im so sorry i did this to you but i didnt actually do this to you

yes this is my everyone lives au but like. all the time. i have never left hawke in the fade and i do not intend to.

fuck whatever nonsense about wardens not being able 2 have kids. by sheer divine power (me) anora and bryant have three daughters; eleanor, sabina & cecelia n both bronson and zevran make Excellent uncles because i think anora deserves good things because i’m tired of bioware being like women bad, actually,

so like most of the time i have the warden & hawke turning up after the move to skyhold n then staying on, with the exception of bryant, carmine & mal. mal is as mentioned previously just There the whole time with her girlfriend. bryant steps in as king of ferelden w/ interests in closing the big hole in the sky spewing demons in2 his kingdom yk. carmine shows up because she wants to help & she wants protection for bethany but she outright says she’d rather die than be inquisitor so cassandra is shit out of luck.

“CHANGE HER MIND VARRIC” “she once doubled down on insisting amaranth was a shade of blue because she didn’t want to admit to being wrong. no one’s changing her mind seeker”

alas is the middle child of eight and is thus very good with children and also bossing around people older than him. 2 of his older siblings come to the inquisition when stuff in wycome has been settled

i left ash with the basic canon background with Some variation (he grew up under the qun and left of his own free will when his magic was discovered n he realized he couldn’t take living as a saarebas

kat on the other hand was raised tal-vashoth and has bounced around basically all over thedas and leads her own merc company when the conclave blows up. she also speaks multiple languages. is there a language she doesn’t speak? probably not

just realized how long this got so im gonna like. stop my general rambling now but lmao yeah theres some basics. waves hands.

#sol.txt #sol.orig #long post #late night followers im SO sorry for this #but also like. #i love them so yall just have 2 cope w/ it #no thoughts head dragon age #peonydarling