#i am literally figuring this all out as i type hence the v long tag ramble and also being nowhere near the post that started this train

[rowenabean]

.

#just saw a post that was like 'if you have religious or moral objections that stop you from providing certain types of medical care maybe #you shouldn't work in healthcare' (paraphrased) and... #what a way to look at the world tbh #like. they're talking about me i think - i am a conscientious objector when it comes to euthanasia #(which granted has come up exactly twice and both cases in a theoretical capacity only this is not a frequent request to me) #and... i am also a good doctor #last week i told someone that her weight doesn't matter to her health with receipts to prove it and she cried #no one had ever told her that before #and that was something that came from me specifically. that was something i would not trust all of the GPs in my practice - a practice of #excellent and compassionate GPs! - to say #i am verifiably doing good in my job that is coming from specifically who i am as a person #i cannot put that down when it comes to issues i care deeply about #fundamentally the fact that i cannot put it down is what makes me a good doctor #i think that's what i'm trying to get at #the reason that i do well by my patients is that i practice out of my values and my ethics #if i did not stand on that core i would not stand at all #so you can't have it both ways. you can't have engaged and active and compassionate healthcare providers without sometimes those engaged an #active providers having things they do not feel comfortable doing #and it is to everyone's service if they are up front about it and do not try to hide (i am suspicious of people who try to hide this) #i am literally figuring this all out as i type hence the v long tag ramble and also being nowhere near the post that started this train #(honestly in med school we talked so much about ethics as like. abortion! euthanasia! trans rights! and the ethics in practice is the littl #things. do you apologise when you mess up. how do you manage a consult with your patient with paranoid dementia and her child in the same #room at one time - or one by one bc that's fraught too. (that one's on top i had one of those today.) how do you act with grace when #you're a bit stressed and your patient is a bit stressed and the nurse wants to add five more things to your book. the day to day ethics is #SUCH a bigger thing when you come to actual practice.) #this is obviously entirely about me and leans on the fact that i largely do think i am doing a good job i am really feeling my own way #to a Thought. but i think to a certain extent it is generalisable

[unproduciblesmackdown]

A Prompt

April 14th: What do you like about being autistic?

can be Hard To Say only because it's like, literally everything about me being an autistic person's Characteristics lol, and that like, that initial sense of Difference between myself and other people was like, noticing some sort of mismatch / misalignment, but also that i was the one feeling shut out / out of place about it, so it's defined in that negative way like, well i guess i'm doing things wrong somehow, and it all keeps being framed like, whenever it seems to stand out that there's something Different about myself, it's about trying to figure out what's wrong here, why some interaction isn't working or whatever, and when actually getting positive responses or whatever, it's doesn't quite feel so individual, like, oh i guess i'm just seeming normal to people here, right lol. but that, also, of course, things you Could consider positive / like about yourself sure might not be received / responded to in that way by other people, can't always even just feel neutral about anything / not notice it, even if it can't possibly actually Matter / isn't causing any kind of problem for anyone else it's like well why are you doing this unnecessarily & Weirdly.....and you know, pathological model vs social model, naturally, where i don't think "hey if this part of being autistic led to Negative Experiences, it's b/c being autistic is worse than being allistic and i wish i was allistic, b/c that's the only way to Not be, for example, objectively and rightfully excluded and punished by people around me" lmao

but for a start i saw some quote from an autistic person the other day mentioning just this sort of like, what they love about themself re: being autistic, and i remember one of them being You Mean What You Say lol, with the example "if i ask 'how are you' it's because i want to know how you are" lmao like yeah a really exhausting Greeting Ritual in particular when it's like, literally every time you hear that you have that awareness like "okay remember this person doesn't Actually want to hear about how you are," tbt to times like "when it's was really discouraging being texted regularly like 'what're you up to / how long will you be away' because for a sec i'd interpret it as 'this person is actually just asking what's up or wondering when you'll be around to hang out with, might be asking with the intention of making plans With you,' but then i have to remember it's about hoping i'm Away so my presence isn't interfering with what they want to do and of course it's not about genuine interest in my life/day otherwise or wanting to hang out" like, this shit is exhausting lmao. and you know, of course i know Different Communication Styles and how people will read different implications and intentions into the same kinds of interactions or behaviors or whatever, it's just Funny(tm) when like. some nt ppl think their social/communication styles are what's Objective, Universal, Correct, Intuitive, Effective, etc. like they'll be like "it's Great to say what you mean instead of Playing Games" and think autistic people are blunt / rude & it's b/c they're communicating Wrong, like actually you guys are saying you love ppl who are Real & Honest while being that post like "i love drama i love games if you fuck with my friends i will help you do it" lmaooo

also yknow to an Extent i think that like. sometimes just being very independently Enthusiastic about something can seem fun to nt people lol like, yes i can monologue about something aloud for 5 or 10 or 80 minutes maybe, or just you know, talk about it to myself via Posting lmfao, and sometimes that appeals to people or they at least regard it Neutrally because it's like. supposing that sometimes even when it's not something someone else is also interested in, idk, people are down for a like, individual experiences of unfettered expression of that passion lmao, but like, ftr i would hate instances of this as like a "because being enthusiastic like that is," deep inhale, "cute" or whatever, like, if i'm gonna talk about something it's a Lecture okay lmao. and plus i do plenty of it via Text lmfao, so, not many times i get to in person talk about whatever, or it'll be like, look at this video of a cool bird. i do not need someone's like, Personal Affection to find it Cute or Wholesome that i'm passionate about birds, or, god knows, fine anything else Cute, an assessment i never need or want, engage w/the information being shared please lmao. and then also, you know, i Draw Things based on it being v Of Interest lol so that's like, thank you to myself for having these Thoughts i want to express about Things Of Interest, i get to have fun like, just focusing in on what Creative Project i wanna do about it lol even if it's also like, boy, what if i could just have the idea and it'd Manifest, and you know, drawing is a way i am Talking About Something, certainly also if i'm dropping a tags essay about it lmao.........love to just delve tf into things and have all these thoughts & things to say about it, and really like, Exceptional when anyone wants to engage with this like, repeatedly / regularly lol. shoutout, Thanks, Epic

and well you know. i don't have any incredible specifics coming to mind here but in whatever ways i might think of things Differently it's like, hell yeah then, epic of me, i will be out here Figuring Shit Out even if i have to marinate on things, i'm sure motivated to engage with stuff that's Of Interest to me, when i have these solid ways to communicate with other people it's fun and flexible lmao, and i think there's that fun of being like, Performative in a way, theatricality, which i think like, maybe a source of that can be when you Have to be aware of the "rules" of interactions / social performance, but also how yknow, you can Act any way, there's nothing universal, there's maybe plenty of bullshit involved, hence how you can Have to be at least somewhat aware of things because you have to try to figure out the Secret rules and patterns and you know, simply Being Yourself and Behaving Naturally at all times isn't an option.....def have the Theatre type Theatrical thing lmao, the "theatre gay ft religious parents, enjoying harmonizing in the church choir lol i'm a Tenor babey" experience lmao, being in 4th grade auditioning for this set of play scenes like oh i get to be the main Antagonist guy? also i'm playing a guy? also i'm in this play and have lines and stuff? Hell yes lmao. and the Stage Performance via eventual roles via dance classes, i remembered the other week the studio i used to be at Used to have this like, idk, thing where the older dancers in a certain group maybe used to have a trip to nyc, think that fell away not long before i was one of those more Skilled Dancers like damnit, never really went to nyc except driving in and out to pick people up from the airport, like hey that distant smudge out the car window is probably the statue of liberty or something.....but the rehearsing and playing a Part and being in shows was. a ton of fun. i Said No to Stage Fright lmfao and really enjoyed being backstage and rehearsals and etc. but also i think i just Can be theatrical you know, in my own social approach lmfao, i'm big on talking with my hands lmao and i can get like, some Social Momentum going that way, i can have some confidence and can sort of hit that groove and it's like, not exactly masking trying to act """"normal"""" but i'm still Being Myself in this more "acceptable" way that nt people might better Understand or whatever. i also just like, personally, i love to be kind of theatrically Funny for sure lmfao and like, if people are just like overwhelmed by the least amount of goofiness / can't or won't play along at all i'm like, Please, work with me here lol, also like damn you live like this??? cmon lol

and well, nonconclusion, but it's pretty difficult to think of things like, what do i Dislike about being autistic which isn't about the way allistic ppl treat you sucks, like, e.g., it'll be like damn augh oof Misophonia, aural texture hell, hardly fun but that's not always a disaster, and as long as i can like, do something to block it out, and if i have to be like "hm this is distressing me b/c this noise is really really pissing me off lmao" as long as you know, i'm not amongst people who are just going to be annoyed at me for making up some problem and/or daring to speak about this experience inconveniently. be normal maybe. idk i'm just like right on, Myself

#30daysofautismacceptance #2021

[dailyserperior]

Have any tips for starting a daily pokemon blog?

Ahhh i’m not sure if I’m a good person to ask but I can try to give some tips! (I think I’ve been asked this in the past too but my nets not really letting me go look right now)

Also this got a little long so I’m sorry ;v; Also i’d take everything I say with a grain of salt, I’m just a nervous person who loves serperior

But if you want to start a pokemon blog, defs pick a pokemon you not only love but love to draw! Doesn’t matter if it’s been done before, it hasn’t been done in your style! Everyone will add their own touch to how they draw. Like no lie one of my fav things is seeing how various people interpret a pokemon, heck even when they interpret YOUR pokemon (I may or may not have several things saved of people drawing Ex in their style cuz its so COOOLLLLLLL, let alone my serp folder)

Sometimes though the pokemon may be hard to draw and you may get frustrated. Like I know I could never run a sceptile blog like my friend does. ( @weekly-megasceptile ) I’ve drawn her sceptile a few times and hoo boy it wasn’t really that fun for me. I give Mint mad props for drawing that thing. My sister ( @occasionallymew ) has come to me a few times because she needed help drawing a pokemon or wasn’t sure on what a pokemon was. in her own words

“It’s why i have the bean [bean is how she and I refer to her mew Jesus]”

So if your favorite pokemon isn’t fun to draw for you you may end up just not having fun. And then you won’t want to run the blog.

That being said if your design is hard don’t think you can’t do it! draw it a bit before starting your blog to see how you like it and it’ll also get easier the more you do it.

Funny enough before I started drawing daily serperior I actually wasn’t that great at drawing snakes. I rarely did. I mostly draw humanoids and monsters and gore. So drawing a snake each day was interesting, more so because I like to draw Serperior closer to a python than how it canonically look (this is kinda the reason they are much rounder how I draw them)

But after drawing it for over 400 posts, I’ve gotten pretty good at it, I don’t really need to look at refs as much for how noodles curl, I can normally just figure it out on my own. I also no longer need to look at pictures of serperior when I’m drawing because I’ve just gotten so used to it. Like I know where to put the yellow curls, I know the husks.

That’s another thing though! this is more a general art tip than daily related, but don’t be afraid of using refs!! Don’t trace or copy directly but using a reference is a wonderful thing if you are unsure of something or the like. Like I have a folder on my laptop that is literally filled with pythons. Just lots and lots of snoots.

Another thing is a bit harder because I can get how discouraging it can be, but don’t feel down if you don’t get a lot of asks or interactions right off. And this may seem a bit mean, but don’t rely on asks to give you content for the blog. The internet can be a fickle place so you may not get the asks you want or many asks. When i started off I didn’t have too many asks if any so I just drew Serperior (this was before I decided to make it my character of excalibur) doing whatever, mostly it was related to Christmas because when I started I was in the middle of finals right before winter break. I was using this as a way to decompress each day after classes, and slowly i started to get some asks.

Depending on your frequency of update, the time you update, how you tag, and your sense of humor or the like, can affect if you get more asks. It also depends on how you interact with your asks.

Sometimes a post will sky rocket and then you get flooded. That’s kinda what happened with Daily Serperior, I can’t remember if it was the Gengar Plush post or the pizza post or even the move in post I had made, but something set off and I got asks a lot.

And don’t be afraid to turn your inbox off if you need to!! I know I’ve had to a few times, actually I had it off for a while, i had it reopened for the giveaway in case people had questions about it. I’ll be closing it again for a bit once I’ve finished the giveaway, because I get overwhelmed easily and it can lead to stress.

Also on the subject of asks, don’t be afraid to delete an ask that makes you nervous or uncomfortable!! Sadly not everyone is super chill, and occasionally you get some weird or bad asks. God am I no stranger to that. Honestly that’s the reason I’ve closed the ask box a few times, some people don’t like listening if you ask them to not send a specific thing. And sometimes it’ll get bad enough you want to quit (I’ve actually had a friend stop their daily blog because she got so tired of a certain type of ask). And if one person keeps sending don’t be afraid to block. I hate blocking but I’ve had to block a few blogs because they would send me asks time and time again on a subject I explicitly asked to not be sent because it makes me highly uncomfortable.

Now to get away from the negative,

All and all a daily blog is mostly about having fun. Interact with the community, send asks to other blogs ect.

Oh that reminds me, but depending on you, if you want to send in character asks it may be good to make a separate account not just a side blog.

With dailyserp i can’t actually follow back or ask as this account it’s a side blog. I do all my following and asks from my main @abunnydreamingofkisses

  (so if you see that name in your notes or watcher list it’s me!) Or i send asks on Anon. I typically send anons to other blogs because I’m pretty shy. I’m always terrified to talk to people. I’m also just really bad at holding a conversation because I just have issues coming up with things to talk about. or I’m drawing and I’m hyperfocused. So if you plan to interact more it may be best to have a separate blog. I never expected to actually get any followers I just wanted to draw a doofy noodle, so I made it a side blog and I sometimes regret that but at the end of the day it’s easier for me.

Another thing is I know there are a number of discord chats you can potentially join! I personally don’t join group chats because it actually will spike my anxiety, I love people and I like to chat and makes jokes but due to a few poor experiences with group chats in the past I have to avoid them to keep from having panic attacks.  But if you are able to maybe ask around see if you can’t join some. you’ll make friends most likely and memes are kinda a good way to get followers oddly enough (people like to laugh haha)

If Humor isn’t your thing maybe go for plot. I Know I follow a few plot based blogs and man it’s killer waiting for an update. Like over at @daily-poppy-primarina I adore the Brutus story line. I’ve got a thing for monstrous characters so learning about the dark primarina is really fun.

I know on serp I focus mainly on humor with a sprinkling of plot, but that’s mostly because almost all my asks are humor based.  I actually do have a plot all written out in a notebook on this noodles past, and I even have a comic I keep meaning to finish up after I lost the original but lifes been in my way (hence my multi week hiatus)

also never be afraid to take a break. I think that has to be my last tip. I hate taking breaks but sometimes it’s needed. Sometimes you’ll get burnt out, sometimes you are over whelmed, sometimes you just feel like getting away. It happens. But don’t let it control you to the point you hate your blog. Take a step back take a breather. It’ll be okay.

At the end of the day it’s about you having fun creating a thing you want. Draw, Write, send memes to ect.

So I guess that’s all i have to say ;v; sorry for the length I’m really bad with being concise haha

#anonymous #ask #sorta snek #Mun rambles