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spaceskam · 5 years

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I don't know if you've ever listened to When you're ready by Shawn Mendes but everytime I listen to it I can only think of Malex ♥️ "Even 10 years from now if you haven't found somebody, i promise i'll be around" "Baby, tell me when you're ready I'm waitin'" could you maybe write about it?

this is quite literally the most malex thing i have ever heard. every goddamn line of this song is malex related. Thank you so much for the prompt and I’m sorry it took me a million years!

ao3

“I don’t understand why you’re mad at me!”

Alex stopped in his tracks, slowly turning to face him. He looked genuinely hurt and confused and maybe one drink more, Alex would’ve stooped to his level of transparency.

“Are you serious? You don’t know?”

“No,” Michael gushed, tears welling up in his eyes as he raked his fingers through his hair. God, he was wasted. “All I know is you told me you only wanted to be my friend and nothing more. Then you lied to me so I didn’t get to be with my mom. Then you came to me and, and started doing the thing where you’re super sweet so you can fuck me and leave me. And I would’ve let you!”

Alex clenched his jaw, taking each blow as best he could.

“Isobel helped me see I needed to protect myself. So I went to Maria before I could give into you! The one time I protect myself from you and you’re mad at me! Stop it! I can barely take seeing you, I can’t take this! Stop!” he screamed.

Alex licked his lips, taking a slow and regulated breath as he stared at the broken man in front of him. He was full-on crying at this point, pulling at his hair and Alex was so thankful for his military training. That was the only thing keeping him on his feet.

“Michael,” Alex said softly, taking a step forward. Maybe he was hallucinating, but Michael seemed to stare crying even harder. “Is that really what you feel happened?”

Michael didn’t answer right away, a million emotions washing over his face. Alex took another step forward. This was one of those stupid moments where he had to be the strong one. He hoped he’d be able to cash it all in one day when he inevitably broke.

“What are you mad at me?” Michael asked again, weaker this time. It didn’t take a genius to deduce that he knew why. He wanted to hear it. He was scared and he needed to hear it.

Alex rested his palms on Michael’s warm, wet cheeks and the man instantly melted into the touch. He wiped his tears away, lifting his hand just long enough to push his hair back. The stench of alcohol and acetone and weed was suffocating, coming off him in droves. Alex had to wonder if they were letting him get this fucked up or if he was sneaking it. He didn’t know which was worse.

“Come talk to me when you’re sober, okay?” Alex whispered, continuing to wipe away his tears, “I am upset with you, but that doesn’t mean I’m walking away. I’m here when you need me no matter what.” Michael sloppily felt for Alex’s wrists before holding on tight.

“You just were. You just tried to leave me, I saw you,” Michael whimpered. Alex sighed, closing his eyes to try and build up his walls a bit better. It was difficult. Michael had gone from kissing Maria to being putty in Alex’s hands in less than an hour. Sure, everything in his system played a part, but, deep down, he knew that wasn’t the reason. Michael was lost and hurting and Alex could wade in the water for him.

It’d already been a decade‒what was a little more?

“Come see me when you’re sober,” Alex repeated, “We’ll talk about anything and everything.”

“Then you’ll stop being mad at me?” he asked. Alex couldn’t answer. He honestly had no idea when he would stop feeling so horrible. He didn’t know what would erase the image of them kissing from his mind.

“I’ll get you are Lyft to take you home, okay? You’re too drunk to drive,” he whispered. When he tried to pull away, Michael held him tight.

“Can I stay with you tonight?” he pleaded. A mournful whine brew in the back of Alex’s throat at the desperation on Michael’s face. He so badly wanted to say yes, to bring him home and wrap him up and fall asleep to the sound of his breathing. But that wasn’t an option, not tonight. Not when Michael had a girlfriend and would regret the choice in the morning.

“Not tonight,” Alex insisted. Michael’s bloodshot eyes scanned over his face, slowly welling up with tears all over again.

“I messed up bad, didn’t I? That’s why you’re mad?” he asked. God, this was torture.

“Michael, just… we’ll talk about it over later. I promise,” Alex said, fishing for his phone to get him a ride home. As much as he wanted to just take him himself, he didn’t actually trust himself not to stay if Michael asked again.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I messed up. I’m sorry.” Michael’s words were a slurring, slobbery mess between sobs. Alex quickly pulled him into a tight hug, letting the man divulge into borderline hysterical sobbing. Honestly, Alex wasn’t sure what he thought he messed up. He’d already made it clear he hadn’t understood.

“It’s okay, it’s okay,” Alex said, shushing him like he would a fussy baby.

“No! It’s not! Stop hugging me, stop, like, like, consoling me! I messed up!” Michael made no move to pull away, even as he told Alex to stop, and for a moment it felt like a horrible guilt trip.

“Michael, st‒”

“No, listen,” Michael said, sniffling as he pulled away just enough to rest his forehead on Alex’s, “I-I’m gonna come, like you said. I wanna talk. I want… I’m sorry. Please, let me fix it.” And, god, how nice it would’ve been if Alex could’ve accepted that. But it was impossible to miss the way his eyes refused to focus and the way he had to steady himself while standing still. Michael was so fucked up, he probably wouldn’t even remember this in the morning.

“Do you even know what you’re apologizing for?” Alex couldn’t help it. All he was hearing was empty apologies.

“No,” Michael admitted, “But I know I hurt you and that hurts me more than anything. I spent ten years waiting for you to come back to me and letting you hurt me that I… I didn’t realize how bad it feels. I know you felt this bad. I know it. I see it. I feel it. I feel you.”

“Guerin…”

“No! Pinky swear we’ll talk,” Michael urged, holding up a pinky. Alex sighed and tried to avoid it, but Michael insisted. He looped his pinky through the other man’s, watching it bring a weird sort of calm over him. “Now we gotta kiss it to make it official.” Michael kissed his hand and Alex reluctantly mimicked him if only to get him to stop. “Good. Good.”

Michael was petting at his chest, wobbling and sniffling all the way. The severity of his behavior made Alex consider bringing him home anyways and having him sleep on the couch so he could check on him. The only issue with that would be dealing with the possible backlash from it that he really didn’t want. But this was Michael, this was family, and he needed help. Even if Michael was hurting him more than he could even comprehend, he was still going to be there.

No matter what anyone thought, Alex had never been good at leaving him.

“C’mon, you’re gonna sleep on my couch tonight, okay?”

Michael let out the world’s biggest sigh of relief.

Alex woke up to an empty house.

His leg was aching due to his stupid decision to sleep in the chair in the living room. He’d considered going to bed, but he couldn’t stop worrying that something would happen to Michael. He had too much shit in his system. While they didn’t know how much it took for an alien to overdose, he wasn’t eager to find out.

Yet, when he woke up the next morning, his couch was empty and so was the kitchen and the bathroom. The only proof that Michael had even stepped foot into the house and spent the night on the couch was the muddy bootprint plastered to the porch and the note on the coffee table that read: ‘thanks’.

As the day went on, Alex wondered if Michael would ever come back to talk. Or, honestly, why he hadn’t stayed to have a talk. Part of him hoped he simply forgot that they had that conversation and it wasn’t that he just didn’t want to. There was so much that he had to say, especially now that it was clear that Michael had misunderstood his intention and was now self-medicating dangerously. Alex wanted to help him if he’d let him.

The day dragged slowly, seeming to slow down even more whenever he bothered to check his phone or check to see if Michael had maybe driven up. Alex wouldn’t lie, it hurt a bit that he hadn’t stayed. Actually, it worried him more than it hurt. Why had he been so scared to stay?

A lot of things were worrying about him.

Once it was dark outside, Alex decided to go back to the Wild Pony. Anxiety bit at his stomach, telling him with certainty that he’d find Michael with Maria and they’d look happy like they had last night. However, Alex could suffer through seeing that when he knew that no one cared enough to address him being messed up beyond recognition. He’d seen them kiss, he knew that Maria had to taste it on his lips and smell it on his breath. If she wasn’t going to take care of him, then he would.

The Pony was bustling and still, Michael was right where Alex knew he’d be, sitting alone at the bar. His head was bowed against the beer bottle and he didn’t react whenever Maria would pass by and pat his head. Alex took a deep breath.

“Hey, Cowboy,” he greeted softly as he took a seat beside Michael. He was wearing the same thing he’d had on last night and smelled of the same substances. Tonight, he hadn’t even bothered hiding the flask of acetone that protruded out of his back pocket.

Michael turned to face him just a little bit, confusion written all over his tired features. Alex offered a small smile and asked the bartender that wasn’t Maria for two glasses of water. Michael never stopped staring.

“Why are you here?” Michael asked.

“I told you, I’m here when you need me,” Alex paused, giving him a once over, “Even when you don’t ask for me.”

Michael’s eyes pooled with tears, but they didn’t fall tonight. Instead, he blinked them away. He nodded.

“Drink this instead,” Alex insisted, pushing the glass of water towards him. Michael eyed it warily.

“You still mad at me?” Michael asked. Alex snorted.

“Yes. But, like I told you, I want to talk to you when you’re sober. So drink this,” Alex pressed. Michael took a deep breath but complied. It didn’t matter that Maria was watching them with jealous eyes or that a few other people in the bar were whispering about them. Michael was trying.

Alex smiled.

Alex jolted awake at the sound of his phone ringing.

He’d done his damnedest to always stay on high alert the past few weeks. Michael had been heavily relying on him, using him as a massive crutch to help him try and get sober. It was working for the most part, but there had been a few nights where he’d been left alone and he’d call Alex, drunk and apologetic and asking to be picked up from the Wild Pony. Alex didn’t blame Maria, he knew she was busy with all of her own issues, but it did rub him the wrong way that she wasn’t more forceful with keeping him away from the bar.

But she was his girlfriend, not his caretaker.

“You okay? It’s three in the morning, where are you?” Alex asked instantly, reaching for his prosthetic already.

“I’m fine, I’m at home. Just… need a distraction ‘s all,” Michael said softly on the other end of the line. Alex let go of his leg, taking a moment before he relaxed back in the bed.

“Okay,” Alex said, “How was your day?”

“Good, good. I worked with Liz for a while. Had lunch with Maria. Went to see Max in the pod,” he listed. Alex closed his eyes to the sound of his voice. It was almost embarrassing how stupid he could be for Michael Guerin, a man with a girlfriend.

“Sounds eventful. You guys any closer to figuring it out?” Alex asked. There was rustling on the other side of the phone as Michael most likely tried to get comfortable in his bed.

“Well, we were talking with Valenti and we think that we got him in the pod soon enough that we might be able to revive him with more human methods. Like, with steroids and a defibrillator to jump-start his system enough for him to get to where Iz and I could heal the rest of the way. Liz and I are working on enhancing a steroid to inject him with,” Michael explained, his tone more hopeful than he’d been in weeks. Months. Maybe years, honestly.

“That’s good, I hope it works. If you ever need my help with anything, I’m here. I know I’m not a super fantastic scientist, but I can do my best,” Alex offered. Michael let out a breathy little laugh.

“You’re so smart, Alex, there’s probably a ton of things you can help with. I’m just… I’m just glad you chose to help me. I really appreciate you and everything you do for me, Alex,” Michael said softly. Alex could feel his heart thump in his chest and his stomach tighten.

It was so weird how much he’d found himself loving Michael all over again. He didn’t think he could love the man more, but the closer they got without having sex as a distraction and with so much trust and communication, the more he found himself dizzy with infatuation. Even if Michael didn’t reciprocate it.

“What are friends for.”

“So, did you have fun on your date?”

Alex furrowed his brow at Michael’s dry tone and annoyed face even though he literally had his arm around his girlfriend.

“Uh, yeah, it wasn’t really a date,” Alex chuckled, grabbing one of the fries from Michael’s plate and dipping it into Maria’s milkshake. Maria rolled her eyes.

“It looked like a date,” Michael said firmly. Alex licked his lips as he thought back to his Grindr hookup from the night before. They’d met at the Wild Pony and played pool for a bit until they both decided they weren’t too sketchy and went back to Alex’s place where they had some pretty good sex before he left at 2 in the morning.

As much as he loved Michael and he was willing to wait, he wasn’t about to go celibate, especially when Micahel was in a relationship. There was just no point. Well, maybe there was no point in dating apps when he knew nothing would come close to what he felt with Michael. But, fuck, he deserved something while he waited.

“No, that was just one of Alex’s fuck toys, you just usually don’t see them because you’re with Liz,” Maria explained and the crease between Michael’s eyebrows got more prominent, “How was this one?”

“Good,” Alex answered, keeping it short. He knew he didn’t want to hear the details of Michael and Maria’s sex life, so he wasn’t about to put Michael through that torture.

But Maria was feeling extra pushy tonight.

“Oh, come on, tell me more than just that!” she laughed. Alex had been trying his damnedest to rekindle his friendship with Maria even though he still felt more than a little animosity towards her. He kept telling himself that it wasn’t her fault completely, she didn’t know the full story, she didn’t know what Michael was to him. On top of that, it didn’t feel fair to welcome Michael back with open arms and then just reject her friendship completely. No matter how much that little voice in his head told him the opposite.

So, to keep it at a happy medium, he pretty much only talked about his random hookups. It made for safe conversation. They didn’t have to talk about Michael, they didn’t have to discuss his past relationships. He just had to talk about the guy with the six-pack who did situps in the bathroom for twenty minutes before sex and tired himself out too much to even be good in bed. Alex just hadn’t anticipated that she’d be talking about it in front of Michael.

“I mean, there’s not much to tell. He was hot, we hooked up,” Alex said simply, trying not to look Michael’s way. Still, he saw the way his jaw clenched and he looked down, letting his arm fall from Maria’s shoulders.

“That doesn’t sound safe,” Michael said. Alex gave a small smile.

“I’m safe, don’t worry. It’s just something to pass the time, make sure I don’t work myself too hard,” Alex promised honesty. He nodded, but it was clear it bothered him.

Alex would be lying if he said that didn’t give him a little hope.

“Are you sure?”

“You need practice, don’t you?”

Alex responded to Michael’s slightly terrified face with the most comforting smile he could manage. He was on his couch, his shirt open, and a giant scratch on display. He’d stupidly been trying to get something out of a tree and misstepped which caused him to slide down the tree a little ways and give him a virtually superficial scratch across his abdomen. It burned a little when he tried to clean it, but that was it.

So he called Michael and asked if he wanted to test his healing abilities.

“But I don’t want to hurt you. What if I kill you instead? Max isn’t here to bring you back. I-I don’t wanna hurt you more,” Michael said, bouncing with nerves. His eyebrows were pulled together adorably in concern. Alex leaned forward with a smile.

“I trust you,” he said firmly, making sure to look Michael in the eyes. And he did trust him, trusted him more than he trusted anyone else in the world. Michael was his family and he meant everything. Especially in the last few months of getting closer and closer and closer.

“Okay,” Michael said after a moment, nodding his head. Alex leaned against his couch and Michael kneeled between his legs. He made sure to keep his breathing regular as Michael’s warm hand laid over his heart. “You ready?”

“Yes.”

And he waited a moment. And nothing happened.

“Okay, wait, I need to talk to you about something before I do this because, from what Liz says, after I put this handprint on you, you’re gonna like… feel what I feel, and I don’t want to have this conversation with you being influenced by my feelings,” Michael said, pulling back sitting on the coffee table. Alex sat up a little straighter. “You told me a couple of months ago to come to talk to you when I was sober. Well… I’m sober.”

Alex licked his lips and silently cursed Michael for not giving him a head’s up that he wanted to have this conversation today. He would’ve planned it out better.

“Uh, well, what do you wanna talk about? I mean… I know that you misunderstood everything that happened before you went and kissed Maria, but I don’t feel like I’m completely innocent in that. I know I’m not good with my words and I also know that you’ve been so fucked over so many times that you’re going to take everything as a rejection even if it isn’t. But I think the main this is that when I came to you in your airstream after Caufield… I wasn’t trying to fuck you and leave or giving mixed signals or acting out of pity. Seeing what my family was capable of and seeing what could’ve happened to you really put things in perspective. I didn’t want to waste time, I wanted to be with you. When I came to you, that was the real deal. I wanted a relationship for real and I was willing to put you above my fears because I realized being without you was scarier than anything my father could do to me. I just had shit timing, like always,” Alex admitted, his chest heavy and his face on fire. He was too terrified to look up at Michael’s face.

“But… But you said that you wanted to just be friends, that I was too much of a criminal for‒”

“Hey, no, I didn’t say that. Fuck anything that says I can’t be with you because we’re too different,” Alex said and he hoped Michael understood he meant more than just the Criminal/Airman situation, “And I never meant just friends. I wanted to get to know you, to start over without all the pain and have something based on trust and not just fear and lust. You know, kinda like we’ve done now.”

When Alex got the courage to look up at Michael, he found him staring at the floor in confusion. Alex considered reaching out to him but decided against it.

“But, at Caulfield, you…”

“I meant everything I said at Caulfield. Just a shit time to tell you I love you,” Alex said. Michael looked up at him with a face not too unlike that night months prior when he was desperate for Alex to stop being so mad at him. “Look, I am sorry. I know it didn’t help that I kept walking away and I should’ve made sure you understood what I meant. That’s my fault and I’m sorry for being so angry at you for making a decision to protect yourself from me. I know I didn’t give you enough reasons to feel like I was all in.”

Things were silent for a moment and Alex wondered if maybe he’d said too much. At the end of the day, Michael was still with Maria. Just because Michael was it for Alex didn’t mean that was reciprocated. Love confessions were a little heavy.

“I’m sorry too,” Michael said, clasping his hands together as he leaned forward on his knees. Alex gave him a small smile.

“Do you know what you’re apologizing for this time?” Alex said playfully, hoping to lighten the mood just a little bit. Michael rolled his eyes.

“Yeah,” he said, licking his lips as he took a deep breath, “I’m sorry for hurting you. Whenever I did that, I had just had so much shit happen and I just… I wanted something that didn’t hurt. And I’m sorry for having issues with you hooking up with people too, I know that it’s not my business.”

“It’s okay. I understand,” Alex said, offering a smile. But Michael took another heavy breath and looked him in the eye.

“But mostly I’m sorry I took advantage of you.”

Michael’s shoulders relaxed as if relieved to get that off his chest. However, something sat heavy in Alex’s stomach at the unexpected words.

“What do you mean?” Alex asked softly. Michael chewed on his bottom lip, casting his eyes down as he messed with his fingers.

“I mean… I’ve known you for, what, seventeen, eighteen years? I know you, Alex, I know you struggle with your words and conveying your emotions‒which isn’t your fault. Your dad didn’t allow you to and that’s fucked. Point is, I knew it. I knew it and I still used it against you, used it as an excuse to hurt you. Then, afterward, I basically guilted you into helping me. I made you put your own feelings to the side to take care of me and… fuck, I’m sorry, Alex. I promise, I’m gonna be better about taking care of you and your feelings. I promise,” Michael explained. Alex managed a little smile as his heart thudded harder in his chest.

He never blamed Michael for everything that happened, but damn was that good to hear. He wasn’t even completely sure why it felt so good. Maybe it was just nice to hear he wasn’t wrong in being hurt by the events.

“Thank you,” Alex replied sincerely. Michael gave him a sweet smile, nodding and gave Alex encouragement to say his own piece. “And, Michael, I just want you to know… I’m here.”

Michael smiled. “I know.”

“No, I mean… I’m here for you,” Alex said and Michael’s smiled started to drop, “I kept you waiting for a decade, so… It’s my turn to wait. And I’ll wait as long as I need to. I love you and I want to be with you and I’m willing to wait.” Michael gulped.

“Alex.”

“And I’m not trying to make you feel bad or force you to choose or anything. If Maria makes you happy, then I’m not going to stand in the way. You can take all the time you need, I’m not trying to push. I just know that you’re it for me and I also know this shit began with me never making that clear. So, just, whenever you’re ready, I’m waiting. Always, no matter what, no matter who you might see me with,” he explained. Michael tugged his bottom lip between his teeth, staring with worried eyes. But Alex wasn’t worried. He didn’t expect anything in return. He just needed him to know.

“No pressure?” Michael asked. Alex grinned and help up his hand, sticking out his pinky.

“None at all. I promise.” Michael managed a smile, looping his pinky with Alex’s and they each kissed their own fists.

“Then let’s get you healed.”

Michael moved closer, kneeling between Alex’s legs once again. He locked eyes for a moment, silently asking for permission which he received immediately in the form of an encouraging nod. Michael gently placed his hand over Alex’s heart again.

His palm started warming up slowly and, along with it, waves of comfort began coursing through Alex’s body. He let his eyes close as it did and, the more he let himself fall into the feeling, the stronger it got. It was Michael that he was feeling, Michael’s overwhelming affection and undiluted, unconditional love. It got stronger and stronger until that’s all Alex could feel or think just love

love

It was overwhelming and it was becoming harder and harder for Alex to keep his composure. It was deep, embedded in his bones. Especially when the feeling grew, blossoming into pure pleasure. His mind and body slowly unraveled, succumbing to whatever Michael was filling him with until he couldn’t think anymore.

And then Michael pressed harder and a determined scream filled the air.

Alex lost all sense of self-control at that point. His back arched into Michael’s touch, his jaw dropping open in a pathetic, deep moan. It was something akin to the world’s most satisfying orgasm. Which had to be when Michael snatched his hand away.

Alex felt dizzy at the sharp loss of contact, most of the pleasure in his system disappearing with it. He could still feel it deep in him and he could feel Michael in his mind in a way he struggled to understand. It was warm and comforting and loving and, had Michael wanted this to lead to sex, Alex would’ve had his jeans on the floor before he could finish his sentence.

But Michael didn’t want it to lead to sex, in fact, he couldn’t seem to breathe as he fell back against the coffee table. Alex did his best to clear his mind, to push away how turned on he was so he could focus on Michael.

“I’m sorry,” he said instantly because what else do you say when you get off on your ex-boyfriend platonically touching you. Michael still couldn’t catch his breath. Alex searched his mind for what he’d been told about healing. “Are you gonna throw up? Do you need me to get a bucket?”

Michael’s heavy breathing started to pick up and he was staring at Alex with wide eyes that almost seemed offended. That was a quick way to shove away all of the good vibes he’d just gotten and it became more apparent that Michael’s presence in his mind seemed to be just as panicked.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay. It’s okay. I’m here, I’ve got you. Look, it worked,” Alex said softly, moving closer to the man on the floor. Alex hesitantly went to run a hand through Michael’s hair. His eyes closed to the feeling, so Alex kept it there, massaging his scalp and letting it soothe him just a little bit. It was clear he was just as overwhelmed as Alex had felt, just in a different way. “Talk to me.”

Michael froze for a moment before scrambling to his feet.

“I have to go. I’ll be back.”

And then he was gone, Alex’s door left wide open in his wake.

Alex didn’t hear from Michael for the rest of the night, but he didn’t let himself worry too much. If there was anything that came out of having Michael’s handprint on his skin was that he was more sure than ever that they were meant to be. Even if Michael was with Maria right now, Alex could feel the love Michael had for him and it was enough to have him strut into the Project Shepard bunker with a helpless grin on his face.

“Well, now everything makes sense.”

“What do you mean?”

Kyle was waiting for him in the bunker already, sitting in one of the chairs and raising an eyebrow high. Alex couldn’t even let his smile fall at that.

“Guerin broke up with Maria last night,” Kyle said. Alex’s heart started to beat a little harder.

“Really?”

“Jeez, Alex, you could at least try to not look so happy about it,” he chuckled. Alex shrugged and went to take his own seat. He wanted to feel bad for Maria since he knew she was probably upset, but he couldn’t bring himself to. Michael was going to be his and he wasn’t going to fuck it up this time.

Things were falling into place.

“So, what happened?” Kyle asked. Alex pulled his partially open shirt to the side, flashing him the handprint. Kyle’s eyes went wide.

“It was just a scratch, but he wanted to practice. And we had a good talk about us and when he healed me, we sort of just… felt each other. He sort of freaked out and left, but he said he’d be back so I guess I should’ve assumed he was going to Maria,” Alex said, shrugging. A stupid smile found his face again once he realized that Michael had taken those feelings so seriously.

“You’re not worried that he freaked out?” Kyle asked. Alex shrugged again. He didn’t really know how to explain it. He could still feel Michael and, even though it was a lot, it was overall positive. He seemed to be feeling good, if not just a little confused about the events. He understood that he just needed a moment.

“No. I… I can feel him. He’s okay,” Alex offered. Kyle rolled his eyes.

“Great. More psychic alien bullshit.”

Michael was pacing the front porch of the cabin whenever Alex got home that night.

Alex made sure to school the smile on his face before he approached him. He didn’t want to overwhelm him anymore or show that he was too excited about what might happen. Michael might not even want to jump into a relationship even if he did just get perfect evidence for just how much Alex loved him. He couldn’t get his hopes up too high.

“Hey,” Alex called to him. Michael stood taller and spun to face him, eyes wide and nerves rippling off his body.

“Hi,” he said, “Can we talk?”

“Of course,” Alex agreed, opening the door and leaving it open for Michael to follow. They didn’t even reach the couch before Michael started talking.

“Yesterday, you… That was a lot,” Michael breathed. Alex smiled and nodded his head, sitting on the couch. Michael sat on the coffee table in front of him just like the day before. “You actually love me.” Alex sputtered a laugh.

“I told you beforehand that I love you.”

“I didn’t realize how serious you were!”

Alex shook his head at Michael and the two of them smiled. Michael’s knee was bouncing and he was moving in between smiling and biting on his lip. Alex fought the urge to bite it himself.

“I broke up with Maria.”

“I heard.”

“I love you too.”

“I know, I can feel it.”

They again fell silent, smiling wider than before. Alex was feeling even more hopeful than before. He couldn’t wait to get his hands on Michael, to call him his boyfriend and to love him as he deserved. And he couldn’t wait to be loved as he deserved.

“I care about your feelings, Alex. Whenever you want to have an epic emotional breakdown like I have, like, weekly, I’ll be there. I’m gonna be here to pick up the pieces just like you do for me. Because you’re my family,” Michael said and Alex wondered if he’d created a list of things to clarify before they finally got back together.

“Can’t wait,” Alex laughed, “You’re my family too.” Michael took a deep breath.

“And we’re gonna be for real this time. All trust and communication, right?”

“I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

“Are you ready?” Michael asked, “Because I’m ready. I can’t keep you waiting for a decade, I need you too much.”

If the world exploded and ended at that moment, Alex wouldn’t have noticed. He wouldn’t have cared. Nothing else mattered except for Michael and Alex and love.

“I’m ready.”

Michael surged forward without much of a warning, pressing Alex into the couch with a desperate kiss. Alex’s body lit on fire as he pulled him closer, melting into everything that was Michael Guerin. It wasn’t that much different than the night before, that absolute feeling of euphoria and love and affection and love and happiness and love and love and love.

It was the beginning of forever.

#malex #malex fic #michael guerin #alex manes #roswell new mexico #roswell new mexico fic #michael guerin fic #alex manes fic #requests #alexs pov #6k word #other tags probably that i can't think of

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