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wicked-storybrooke · 5 years

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Trying to Make Sense of OUAT Season 7’s Timeline Part II- An Unsolvable Puzzle: The Coronation & Everyone’s Ages

Hey folks! Here I go again trying to explain things I will never fully comprehend! Please read part one (wicked-storybrooke.tumblr.com/post/177430184596/trying-to-make-sense-of-ouat-season-7s-timeline) to understand what the heck I’m on about a bit better. Again, please feel free to add to this or to correct me if there’s something I’ve missed!

Now, for the coronation!

So first of all, I don’t know what’s going on with Pinocchio over here, since the last time we saw any version of him, he was adult August. I cannot try to explain this without my head exploding, so I’ll leave that part for now.

So the coronation can’t have happened too long after the events in Storybrooke (with Curious Archer and the town folk) in 7x22, given the fact that young Robin was 5 years old at the time and young Neal is around a year older than her (I’m not sure if we were ever given an official age gap between the two). This means the Hyperion Heights characters cannot be in their own original timeline during this coronation. So after defeating Wish!Rumple they either: traveled back to the future xD so they could live out their lives in their own timeline and grabbed another time-hopping-bean and took a ride straight to the United Realms around 19-years-in the past just to have the coronation at that exact time; They time traveled around 3 years into the future from the time Robin meets her 5 year old self in 7x22, in which case they basically skipped time up until Hope is born, so that the coronation could be held at that exact time; alternatively they were trapped around 22 years in the past for 3 years at least or they just wanted to remain around 22 years in the past as compared to their original timeline? I think the option that arguably hurts the story least is the one where they returned to their own timeline after Rumple dies and defeats Wish!Rumple and just took a trip (22 minus 3 years, which would be) 19 years into the past for them or they waited 3 years in their own timeline and visited the UR for the coronation 22 years in the past. Sounds convoluted, I know and the biggest problem is why would Regina unite the realms in the past only to return to her own timeline. If that did happen I imagine she left the leadership of the United realms up to a bunch of other queens, kings, princes and princesses such as Snow and Charming for a hot minute up until her return in what would be around 3 years for them.

One thing’s almost certain, they must have definitely grabbed Tiana from Hyperion Heights and Zelena from San Francisco (both would likely be from the same timeline as the Hyperion Heights folk in Storybrooke’s). This is definitely the Zelena who was cursed to be Kelly, since this Zelena has magic and storybrooke!Zelena doesn’t regain magic until Robin’s 18.

If the S7 Characters were stuck in the past or chose to remain there, how did Robin and Zelena not mess up the time-space-continuum??? This is assuming Kelly!Zelena didn’t hitch a ride straight back to San Francisco after her sister’s coronation. If we still put the coronation 3-5 years after the townsfolk chased Alice & Robin with axes & crossbows, then we can say past!Regina has already left to help past!Henry at this point. In fact, she’s definitely left because on the day she chooses to stay in the New Enchanted Forest, Emma is still pregnant.

Now assuming every event occurs in a single timeline, the events in what was assumed to be Stoybrooke in 7x11, with 18-year-old Robin and Zelena had to have actually occurred in the Storybrooke section of the United realms. So why did neither of them or Regina mentioned that they already knew the future, that everyone would be absolutely fine, that the HH curse would break and that the Regina they just reunited with would eventually cast a curse to bring all the realms together?- Well, because of the space-time-continuum of course!! They’ve seen the movies, they know what’s up. No but seriously, there has to be some kind of memory potion involved (if it happens in a single timeline!). Maybe Regina took one before she left to help Henry and maybe Robin had one hell of an 18th birthday party with her mum and they mistook glasses of memory potion for party cocktails before they left (pssst….if anyone wants to write this crazy party, I’ll love u forever!) or Regina just gave them some when they arrived, knowing that the consequences could be severe if any of the Mills women already knew their future.

Unless of course, by being in the past they created a whole new timeline or when the Coven of the Eight’s curse was cast, it didn’t only take them back in time and to another realm; It could also have taken them to an alternative timeline! A timeline where an alternative-timeline-version of Robin grows up in the United Realms (as opposed to the Hyperion Heights!Robin we know, who could have grown up in plain ol’ Storybrooke). I’m not sure if the second theory works without other giant plot holes though but I think it aligns with what we’ve seen of time travel in this show in the past.

I was originally gonna say the coronation happened just after an almost 19-year-old Henry left to find his own story (Jack said Henry spent his 19th birthday with him at the Crimson Crow) but if what I’ve worked out i my previous post is correct, it has to be at least around 3 to 5 years after Henry leaves, when Hook is looking for a cure for his heart so that he can return to 10~ year old (plus or minus a few years) Alice. As previously mentioned, the coronation also has to have occurred months after pregnant Emma visits Henry in the New EF. Neal doesn’t look 11 at the coronation but it wouldn’t be the first time the writers have chosen a younger actor to play the role by mistake. I think Josh dallas said he was suppose to be about 7 but idk it’s kinda close. If we say Neal was 7 during the coronation, that would make Henry 19 during the event. That would mean he met Ella and Wish Hook when he was 19. But that doesn’t work because, as mentioned in my previous post, we know Ella is 14+ years older than Alice and around the same age as Henry. We also know that Ella meets a 17+ year old Alice in ‘Pretty In Blue’ when the older woman is at least 31. And we also know that Hook is looking for a cure when he meets Henry. Alice has to be about 5 or 6 when Henry is 19. I don’t think young Alice is 5 or 6 in ‘Knightfall’ and we know Hook meets Henry after he’s separated from his daughter, so the coronation has to have occurred at least 3 years after the Bayou Rolls into Storybrooke in 7x22. That would make Alice 8 or 9 when Wish Hook meets Henry (which is more plausible!).

So that would mean Henry actually met Ella and Wish Hook when he was between 22 and 24 and so he’d be about that much older than Hope. 8 or 9 years later, he’d be between 31 and 33 when he meets 17+year old Alice. 30 makes the most sense, since Ella would be at least 31 and is likely a bit older than Henry, which would make Alice 8 when Hook is poisoned if we put past!Neal at 9 during the coronation. So, if we put Henry at 22 years older than Hope and if we say Henry is then 41-22=19 years, that would make Hope 19 in the present day, which would mean they are 19 to 20 years in the past during the coronation (depending on baby Hope’s age at the time). They were almost definitely 22 years into the past when 27-year-old Robin met 5-year-old Robin in 7x22, so it would make the most sense that around 3 years have past since 7x22′s Storybrooke shenanigans. Booyah!

Henry Meets Ella whilst Regina, Hook & Emma visit Henry and they meet Wish Hook

Henry is 22~

Ella is 23~

Emma is 40~

Hook is physically 40~

Wish Hook is de-aged to appear like OG Hook, so is likely physically 40~ (I’m gonna say Wish Hook originally appeared older because he aged during his time-travelling adventure(s) as he searched for a cure (refer to part I) it’s quite a stretch, I know but it’s the only way I can make sense of it since these events had to have occured around 9 years before the events of 7x11 due to Robin & Hope’s ages at the coronation)

Alice is 8/9~

Robin is 8/9~

Wish Hook is briefly reunited with Alice and Ella & Henry visit wonderland & eventually Lucy is Born and Drizella is turned to stone

Henry is 31~

Ella is 32~

Alice is 17~

Wish Hook doesn’t seem to age from here (probably because of the de-aging spell) so is still physically 40~

Drizella is 28~

Zelena & Robin travel to the EF2

Robin is 18

Henry is 32~

Ella is 33~

Alice is 18~ and off on her travels

Lucy is 1~

Alice & Robin meet

Alice 19~

Robin 18/19~

The curse is cast

Henry is 39~

Ella is 40~

Wish Hook is physically 40~

Drizella is physically 28~ because she didn’t age when she was turned to stone but her actual age is 36~

Alice is 25~

Robin is 24/25~

Lucy is 8

The curse breaks (assuming 2 years past and they aged during this time)

Henry is 41~

Ella is 42~

Wish Hook is physically 42~ (if the de-aging spell’s magic wore off in the LWM)

Drizella is physically 30~ but is actually 38~

Alice is 27~

Robin is 26/27~

Lucy is 10~

The present day Storybrooke folk when the HH curse breaks

Emma is 59~ (18 years older than henry at this time)

OG Hook is physically 59~

Hope is 19~

Prince Neal is 28~

The coronation

Henry is 44~

Ella is 45~

Wish Hook is physically 45~ (if the de-aging spell’s magic wore off in the LWM, if not he’s still physically 40~)

Alice is 30~

Robin is 29-30~

Lucy is 13~

Wish!Henry is 19-21~ (refer to part I to understand why I think this)

Neal is 8-9~

Little!Robin is 8~

Pinnochio is ??!??!??

The Season 7 characters’ past selfs during the coronation (just after pregnant emma visits Henry)

Henry is 22~

Ella is 23~

Wish Hook is physically 40~

Alice is 8/9~

Robin is 8/9~ (given past!Neal and past Hope’s ages at the coronation. Meaning there had to have been around a 9 or 10 year gap between the events of 7x02 and the moment Lucy was born since Robin was 18 when Lucy was still a baby in 7x11)

#ouat #curious archer #glass believer #knightrook #alice jones #henry mills #ella mills #robin mills #drizella tremaine #regina mills #zelena mills #lucy mills (ef)#once upon a time #ouat meta #ouat s7 #reposting because of problems with link #my head is not okay #becky rambles

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housebeleren · 6 years

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Dominaria New Commanders

Yeah, I know I’m way behind. I’m gonna try to blaze through the Dominaria posts super fast at this point, skip M19 pretty much altogether, so I can jump back into what’s current.

But first Dominaria. Which means let’s look at new Commanders! Obviously there are a metric shit-ton in Dominaria, given that Legendary is a thing, so let’s just get right into it! Obviously, I’ll be looking at these from a 75% perspective, as always.

It makes sense to start with these two, since they’re the Buy-a-Box promo for the set. First of all, I’m just going to say that I hate that the Buy-a-Box promos are unique cards. This card is sitting at around $15, and that’s only because they’re... honestly not that great. Can you imagine if the card were something that were playable in Standard or Modern? They’d be over $50 easily!

Anyway, as far as being a general is concerned, I do like them. They’re fully 75% playable, and they bring a different aspect to Boros, which is a very underutilized color combo in EDH. Them costing 6 mana to play is unfortunate, because making them a bit smaller body as a 4-drop would make them a great general. But for casual tables, they’re brilliant.

Let’s not kid ourselves, this card was made for Commander. It has nothing to do with the set or mechanics, but is just a sweet design for EDH. Enough has already been written about Muldrotha that I don’t need to get into it. I think the design is clever for Sultai, and there will be plenty of ways to break it. Nuff said.

Darigaaz has the other problem, which is that he really plays like a Limited bomb rather than an EDH general. The trouble is in these colors you have Prossh and Karthus, both of which are better Jund dragons. Even original Darigaaz is kinda a better commander. Waiting 3 turns to get him back is just not how EDH works.

Broken. Combotastic. I’ve already seen Jhoira decks that made me want to vomit. The fact of the matter is that it’s so easy to go infinite off an ability like this, given the prevalence of cheap artifacts in Magic’s history. She also slots perfectly into Breya decks, as if they needed any more reasons to be bullshit.

Let’s not kid ourselves. Verix was designed for Standard, which is unfortunate, since Lyra is currently making Verix look cute and pathetic. Verix is a Limited bomb, but honestly not Commander material.

New Multani is interesting. My first impression is that he belongs as one of the 99 in a Lands deck, like Gitrog. But there’s actually some weird Voltron potential here. Stick him in a crazy ramp build and just run over your opponents. I could see it in casual circles.

Lyra is the real shit. She’s dominating Standard, and on top of that, she’s arguably playable if you’re looking to make mono-White Angels a thing. Avacyn is still the best EDH angel, but she is an 8-drop. Lyra comes down way earlier and makes your deck threatening until you get to your bombs. So there may be something here.

If she hadn’t been restricted to spells you control, I’d have been sold on Blue Dualcaster. As it is, she seems like mediocre filler for an Inalla deck, and mediocre-er filler for a spellslinger deck. I’d even run the Uncommon Adeliz as a general over Naru Meha, and that’s saying something. Cute in Draft tho.

Aside from having a ridiculous name (seriously, say “Belzenlok” five times fast), this guy has some potential. I’m not seeing him as a general, but as an inclusion in the 99 of decks like Rakdos, Lord of Riots, or other Demon tribal, he’s pretty solid.

Jodah is another one that was built for EDH, no question. I would’ve liked to see him at 4/4 and out of Bolt range, but whatever. I’m putting him at the head of my Superfriends deck, for sure, no questions asked. Besides that, there are some really cool builds for him to cast massive threats like Eldrazi titans and such for cheap. Seems good, but not actually broken, which is where I like my buildaround generals to live.

Aryel is slow and not super impactful, but Knights tribal is jank anyway, and she’s probably the best general they’ve got at this point. I’d make a 50% version of this deck.

Radha seems pretty sweet. I could definitely see her heading up an interesting tokens build, with the ultimate goal to burn out opponents with massive mana spells. That said, I don’t think she’ll see competitive play anytime soon.

Oh, you forgot about Niambi, didn’t you? It’s the first time they’ve printed a new Legend in a Planeswalker deck, so I’m not surprised. Honestly, Niambi is a huge miss, mechanically, as many have already commented. Having her only job be to go find a dude to take care of things is pretty inexcusable. They could have at least given her an ability like: “Tap: Prevent 1 damage to any target,” as a way to protect the Planeswalker she went and found. But whatever. If Teferi, Timebender were a better card, I could actually see running this as a weird jank deck where you just keep ultimating him then bringing him back with Niambi. But he’s basically garbage without being able to abuse his ultimate, and that’s hard to do in these colors without Doubling Season. I think there’s an infinite combo here with Niambi, Teferi, Deepglow Skate, and Deadeye Navigator. That sounds definitely like a reasonable plan, right?

Shalai is the real deal. At first glance, she reminds me of Sigarda, though the fact that she doesn’t have Hexproof herself makes me think of a different build. Instead of Voltron, I’d try to create some sort of Hatebear control deck with accidental infinite mana combos. Either way, angels are always popular, and Selesnya hasn’t gotten a ton of great generals recently, so I expect some people to be excited for Shalai.

Oof. 7 mana? Really? At 6, this would still be basically unplayable. Stick with Olivia if R/B Vampires is your schtick. I mean... fine. I guess there’s some sort of weird Pestilence Voltron build here somewhere, but that seems... not great.

Evra is really an interesting design, but I would have liked it a lot more at 4 or 5 mana, since 6 is just so punishing for a general with no protection. Even so, it’s a long shot for this to see any play outside of limited. If it does, it would be some sort of odd win condition in a lifegain deck.

Josu is amazing in the 99 of a Zombies build. As a general, he’s a little underwhelming, but I suppose if you’re looking for mono black go-wide you could do worse.

Marwyn is interesting. She leans towards a go-wide Voltron direction, which is a little strange, but works for Elfball. I don’t think she’s going to supplant Freyalise or Ezuri anytime soon, but she’ll also work well in the 99 of those builds too.

Well, Inalla got a new best friend. There’s basically no reason to run him as a general, but he’s going to be great in the 99.

We all love Squee, and this version of Squee actually has some potential. I can absolutely imagine putting Squee into some builds of Purphoros, and he’ll do work in Food Chain variants of Prossh. As a general himself, he’s a little weak and seems like a poor version of Norin.

I dunno... this card intrigues me. There’s potentially some sort of strange reanimator build here, but unfortunately a lot of the targets you’d really want are larger than 3 CMC. I could definitely see this seeing use in a Captain Sisay build, getting back all the cheap legendaries you’re looking for.

Okay, hear me out, but I think Torgaar is potentially a totally viable Big Black general. With a few cheap, recurrable creatures, you can land Torgaar pretty early. But more importantly, with a Wound Reflection out, you can one-shot somebody. It’s a little jank, to be sure, but anytime there’s “one card” combos like this, it’s worth taking seriously.

This card is for limited & maybe Standard. No way is a vanillia flier seeing EDH play.

I know I just said a vanilla creature isn’t going to see EDH play, but a 7/7 artifact creature for only 4 mana is pretty intriguing. Even just as a beater in Jhoira decks, this could see something.

Alright, now that we’re in the Uncommons, I’m not going to go through all of them, since they’re mostly just limited fodder. Adeliz is one of the 10 archetype signpost cards, and she’s the real deal. And as far as a R/U Wizards general, there’s actually some potential here. I mean, Wizards will always live in Inalla’s shadow, but if you’re in the market for a more aggressive tempo version, Adeliz is your girl.

Garna is really interesting. There’s a reanimator build in here somewhere, but it does seem a little pricy to be super viable.

Hallar is also super interesting. There’s not quite enough good Green or Red Kicker cards to really turn this on, but with a few more printed, there could be a real ramp build in here.

There’s a really interesting design here. Given the dearth of Sagas, I think this is really likely to be an Artifact build. Giving all your Artifacts Flash is a good way to keep the opposition guessing, and the potential to win out of nowhere. I could definitely see this doing something.

Another super interesting design. There’s some similarity to Mairsil here, though obviously a lot more restrictive. But if I were feeling ambitious, I could try to build something around her.

Slimefoot is the real deal. This little guy is a super strong contender for best Saproling commander printed. He’s a self-fueling machine, and a great general.

Tatyova seems like a great addition to just about any Simic deck. Playing Lands and drawing cards is exactly what the colors want to do. She’s probably best in the 99, but could head up a deck herself if you’re so inclined.

Don’t get me wrong, Tiana isn’t...great. That said, I’m really excited for them to be exploring this space for R/W, since so many Boros generals are purely focused on combat. I’d love for them to keep designing cards in this vein.

Whisper is sorta a variant on Hell’s Caretaker, but with more flexible timing coming at the expense of requiring multiple creatures. That said, I don’t think Whisper is going to be great at the helm of his own deck, but definitely could be a role player in the 99 of reanimator builds.

Aaaand then there’s Yargle. Somehow, this bizarre little guy became one of the most iconic cards of the set, spawning memes left and right. And you bet your ass I went right ahead and built myself a Yargle deck. Is it good? Not a chance. Did I put in Hatred and Tainted Strike for quick one-shot dickpunch wins? Fuck yeah.

So that’s basically it. There are a few more, but not that will have any impact on the format. With that, I’m wrapping up, and I’ll wrap up Dominaria shortly here as well.

#mtg #mtg commander #dominaria #magic the gathering

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